#do your research folks

[theramblingvoid]

Low level/continuous pain tips for writing

Want to avoid the action movie effect and make your character's injuries have realistic lasting impacts? Have a sick character you're using as hurt/comfort fodder? Everyone has tips for how to write Dramatic Intense Agony, but the smaller human details of lasting or low-level discomfort are rarely written in. Here are a few pain mannerisms I like to use as reference:

General

Continuously gritted teeth (may cause headaches or additional jaw pain over time)

Irritability, increased sensitivity to lights, sounds, etc

Repetitive movements (fidgeting, unable to sit still, slight rocking or other habitual movement to self-soothe)

Soft groaning or whimpering, when pain increases or when others aren't around

Heavier breathing, panting, may be deeper or shallower than normal

Moving less quickly, resistant to unnecessary movement

Itching in the case of healing wounds

Subconsciously hunching around the pain (eg. slumped shoulders or bad posture for gut pain)

Using a hand to steady themself when walking past walls, counters, etc (also applies to illness)

Narration-wise: may not notice the pain was there until it's gone because they got so used to it, or may not realize how bad it was until it gets better

May stop mentioning it outright to other people unless they specifically ask or the pain increases

Limb pain

Subtly leaning on surfaces whenever possible to take weight off foot/leg pain

Rubbing sore spots while thinking or resting

Wincing and switching to using other limb frequently (new/forgettable pain) or developed habit of using non dominant limb for tasks (constant/long term pain)

Propping leg up when sitting to reduce inflammation

Holding arm closer to body/moving it less

Moving differently to avoid bending joints (eg. bending at the waist instead of the knees to pick something up)

Nausea/fever/non-pain discomfort

Many of the same things as above (groaning, leaning, differences in movement)

May avoid sudden movements or turning head for nausea

Urge to press up against cold surfaces for fever

Glazed eyes, fixed stare, may take longer to process words or get their attention

Shivering, shaking, loss of fine motor control

If you have any more details that you personally use to bring characters to life in these situations, I'd love to hear them! I'm always looking for ways to make my guys suffer more write people with more realism :)

#voidrambles #writing #whump #does this count as that? whatever those folks will probably enjoy it at any rate #this is honestly mostly for my own reference but i hope it can maybe help some other people too :) #I'm so pulled in by books that write pain in a human and detailed way and not just when it's dramatic or intense #would love to see more of that and incorporate it into my own writing #oh i should have added. distraction seeking to that list #like writing a really long post about. #...yes i may be chronically ill and having a flare today and yes i may be farming myself for writing tips for Future Me hdgfhfhsjs #but hey gotta do your research somewhere babeyyy it all goes in the creativity soup #tw injury #tw illness

[adhdandcomics]

adding to my tags because i’ve been thinkin a lot about the post i just reblogged and have more thoughts:

i’ll be real, the more i saw ‘hey adhd influencers are so annoying’ the more i worried that i was unconsciously contributing to the spreading reputation of adhd folks as annoying and over-pathologizing every symptom they experience

and then i realized. i am not a goddam influencer or life coach or representative. obviously i have some obligation as someone who cares about myself and the people that like my comics to not spread harmful ideology or blatant misinformation but i never intended myself to be a “’increase your productivity!!’ blog OR a ‘if you have XYZ you have adhd!’ blog. and i do this for fun, and originally started this blog bc i had a lot of internalized shame and self loathing about my adhd and thought if i could make it funny i might have less of that. let’s get real! and it worked!

i’ve obviously done this kind of thing— (hey these symptoms might be adhd!) a lot before in my life & on this blog, but there’s more to it than trying to be an “influencer” or whatever. a term that didn’t even exist when i started this blog!

i felt very isolated trying to find out if i had any mental problems & what have you originally because of large advice (etc) blogs with staunchly anti self Dx views at the time

so i overcorrected when i DID get dxed and tried to validate everyone who was like me. and of course. not the best course of action always for the ol mental health. tried to be the source of positivity and jokes that i didn’t see because the online adhd presence was near non-existent.

and anyway. i make a lot of fun of myself & the way m brain works in my comics obviously but it is not my obligation to... how do you say.... not be annoying online.

because if folks interpret MY little jokes as a strict guide to diagnosis. that’s on them, really, not me. i also believe “making adhd your entire personality” is a non-issue. so what if people find out they have it and get over excited with identifying as adhd. saying this as someone who DID do it. criticism of this gives the same vibes as people being annoyed that young queers make “being queer” their whole personality. im very obviously more than a guy with adhd, and id reckon other adhd comic artists are too. (im friends with a lot of them!) it’s fine to post about it online.

anyway. i just don’t take myself too seriously and i’m a comic artist for myself first! and you know what, i’ve been considered annoying my entire life. what do i care if a few more folks think i’m annoying. neurotypical or not

#i think the article did have some good points especially on the capitalism and marketing angle but i oft think it did venture into #being mad at individual folks who post jokes about adhd. which is literally fine thats what an opinion piece is for lol #i am just very tired of people pretending that a lot of reaction to online adhders is not in itself just an extension of the ableism #we already were facing #'adhd people are so annoying everyone does this youre pathologizing everything' ok and how exactly are you helping. #i hesitate to throw my hat in with hating on adhd tiktok because i am simply not on tiktok and have no way to back up my thoughts #that they may be annoying and oversimplifying a complex disorder on the 'drains your attention span' website. #and i think perhaps the value of each adhd resource varies widely depending on who made it and what theyre even posting. #sometimes its a joke made by a person with adhd. sometimes its sourced and cited research. sometimes its someone discussing their personal #experiences in depth. sometimes its someone talking completely out of their ass. sometimes its THINLY veiled ableism. #its up to the individual to research and determine the value of the memes and resources you seek #anyway. perhaps these points are tough to clarify on sites like insta and twitter. bless. #text #adhd #im punk now #oh and yeah i also agree lots of folks do not talk about the unsavory parts of adhd but rather the funnies and the sillies. but that is #once again a larger capitalism and marketing and ableism problem #r we not talking about them because we are actively trying to infantalize this disorder or is it because we collectively experience a lot #of internalized ableism and hesitate to talk about our worst symptoms for fear of the backlash #weve always gotten about them 🤔🤔🤔 #much to consider #if youve read this far sorry for tangent number 56 about this. but also start being more unapologetic about your disorders. fuck it! #<3

[not-poignant]

Techniques for writing a bad drug trip:

We're going to be using excerpts from one of my own chapters here from my story Eversion to discuss the kind of writing techniques that will help make a bad drug trip more believable. In context, the character Connor has nonconsensually been given a synthetic made-up highball of drugs that gives him a horrible time, and this does not accurately reflect what bad drug trips look like across all drugs, for example sometimes throwing up on ayahuasca is a feature, and not a bug. What I'll be focusing on instead are the actual narrative techniques that indicate an affected mind and body vs. specific technques for specific drugs.

Beginning Stages:

Firstly, pre-bad-trip, it's useful to depict your character beforehand as being fully - or as close to fully lucid as possible. Have them realising things, actively thinking, describing their surroundings, and doing things in a kind of logical way - show them doing something mundane even, like walking into a room, or a cafe. In this case, Connor walks into a cafe, describes the cafe, makes some mental notes and then has a lucid conversation.

Next, most of the time any drug gives you physical symptoms even before the bad trip part, so describe those. In this case:

Seconds later Connor’s heart began to race

The needle slid free and Connor hardly felt it.

He stumbled over nothing as he passed the group of cyclists, staring at them as his heart beat harder and harder, as sweat broke out over his forehead.

At this point in the story, another character takes over, the person who gives him the highball picks up the conversation because Connor is overwhelmed by the physical sensations and doesn't feel like talking. He stops thinking about his environment accurately and starts to notice things while dropping others. His thoughts are already being affected.

This is when you can start using techniques like time skipping, forgetfulness, memory loss, or alternatively focusing on one thing a lot and a lot of other things a little.

Connor nodded, thinking that he needed to get away, that he needed to go somewhere. He reached for his phone, but it wasn’t there. Where was his phone? His vision slanted, time slipped away from him. He was beneath a tree, throwing up while Gabriel petted his shoulder and waited beside him.

Here we have a strong time skip - Connor goes from looking for his phone, in the next paragraph he's throwing up by a tree. This progression of events has no logic, except for the bad drug trip. Which means we now know Connor is being really affected by what's happening. These two paragraphs also show forgetfulness - Connor needs to get away / needs to go somewhere, but can't remember where. He looks for his phone, but has forgotten Gabriel took it from him. You don't even need the 'time slipped away from him' description, vision slanting or blurring tends to indicate to readers in situations like this that someone is being quite seriously affected by what's happening to them.

Middle Stages:

Then, he was walking, but couldn’t think past the scattered, rushing noises in his ears, looking like black jags across his vision.

He landed hard on his knees and stared down bewildered at the grass. He looked around, vision turning to brightness, cars zooming by too fast and too large, the sky distorted, the clouds inverting. He raised a hand to his head, but another hand – warm and gentle – rested at his temple, thumb gently stroking. Connor leaned into it, whimpering.

We're doing a lot of time skipping now, alongside mental symptoms.

The writing technique itself is changing. In one sentence we cover a lot of choppy subjects - vision turning bright, cars too fast, sky distorting, clouds inverting. It gives a sense of too much information happening at the same time - Connor's senses are overwhelmed.

This kind of choppy information can be delivered in short complete sentences, but I liked one run-on sentence here because it gives that sense of 'and then this and this and this and this and this' which is sometimes how it feels to have too much information coming in at once.

It's also making use of the senses. We have vision and hearing and touch all in the same paragraph. We also have 'too fast' 'too large' - things are too much. Not only that, but describing things as distorted indicates strongly that Connor's already hallucinating and hasn't realised yet.

At this point in your bad drug trip, you should not be using your regular writing style. If your character isn't thinking like normal, you might want to consider also not writing 'like normal' for that character.

(This is the same for when a character is having a flashback, is overwhelmed, or is experiencing something intense for any reason).

He took great, shuddering breaths and then pressed shaking fingers to his stomach. The knot of pain in his thigh was manifesting there as well.

Now, for the bad drug trip to truly be bad, we also have the physicality of the experience. The body comes along for the ride and it often feels like it's dying during a bad drug trip.

Huge shuddering breaths and shaking hands can indicate an overloaded nervous system, also someone who might be going into shock, or who is hyperventilating, or who is literally experiencing respiratory distress. We don't have to know what it is - one or all of them could be true! A person on a bad drug trip, unless they're a medical professional or experienced with bad drug trips, will not know or be assessing what is happening to them as it happens.

He flinched back when he saw black inching out from beneath his knees on the grass, dimly knew it as a hallucination before that awareness vanished and he pushed himself back and away.

Boop a hallucination. Connor was already hallucinating, but now he realises too. You don't need to include this. I was writing a smart, analytical character, and he does know he's having a bad drug trip, so he's allowed little moments of realisation. Your character might know more, or they might know less.

Intense / Peak Stages:

He could feel the way his body pulsed at discordant rhythms, too fast, too slow, never in sync throughout his body. The tips of his fingers were throbbing. His feet felt like stones. He looked at Gabriel’s perfect beard and thought of tearing his face off. It would be brief, brutal, bloody, but then he could just lie down.

Writing emotional distortion here is that Connor feels like behaving violently, which - to this degree - isn't normal for him. The drug overdose is making him vengeful. We know it's part of the drug overdose because the first part of the paragraph focuses on all his physical symptoms. The drug trip might make your character too terrified to function, it might make them aroused (i.e. fuck or die sex pollen scenarios), it might make them giddy. Have some emotional distortion going on on some level. Even if it's extreme anhedonia or apathy in the face of potentially dying.

The hospital was clearly giving him too many sedatives. He didn’t know how to tell them that he had no tolerance, he couldn’t take the dosages that his father was pushing for.

Now we hit full flashback. Connor now believes he's being overdosed with sedatives in the hospital, and is no longer in the present at all. He's not even 'I remember' - he's just there. Flashbacks won't happen with every bad drug trip but they are common to any bad drug trip that is hallucinatory in nature.

Connor stared up at the ceiling of his apartment, and his hands rested on the floor. His heart was beating far too fast, fluttering in his chest. He felt hazy. Every now and then he had to clench his hands into fists so tight that his knuckles ached. A compulsion. He couldn’t stop himself from doing it. He’d feel himself shake, and then he’d stop, and he’d stare upwards. He was lying on the floor.

Connor stared ahead. The corner of his mouth felt wet. He was drooling. His fingers and toes kept twitching against his will.

What Connor is describing now is seizure activity.

Connor isn't consciously clenching his hands into fists, his body is doing that. He calls it a compulsion, but it's not. Feeling your body shake and then stop and then shake again is - in this instance for Connor - active seizure activity.

Not all seizures cause full unconsciousness of the entire brain, for example. Connor doesn't know what's happening to him, but we can tell from the physical symptoms here - heart fast and fluttering, feeling hazy, physical movements completely beyond his control - that he's now in a danger zone.

If you want the bad drug trip to reach 'a normal person would be in an ambulance by now' - this is a good place to be. Focus on strange sensations of the heart, the pulse, shaking, the sensation of overheating or being too cold. If you want, look up the symptoms of shock, or tachycardia.

Aftermath of bad drug trip:

In the aftermath of a bad drug trip, be aware that it can take some time for a person's thoughts to return to normal. Don't write an instant return to normalcy once a person is physically stabilised. Often they show mood shifts that are quite profound. Even a person coming down from MDMA often experiences depression or flatness after a great night out with zero negative memories.

Normal aftermaths/ongoing side effects from bad drug trips include apathy, depression, suicidal ideation, anhedonia, flatness, lethargy, exhaustion (literally, the body physically went through several marathons), pain, and foggy, disconnected thinking (both because the brain went through something traumatic and the drugs take a while to work through the system). GI (gastrointestional disturbances) are common, from 'not going to the bathroom at all' to 'diarrhea' etc. Sometimes these after-effects last days, sometimes they last weeks, sometimes they even last months.

-

So! In summary helpful techniques for bad drug trips can include:

Shorter, choppier sentences to indicate overwhelm

Physical symptoms being 'experienced' - character often doesn't know what's happening except in special circumstances

A progression of physical symptoms.

Focus on all of the senses

Hallucinations and/or flashbacks (one usually happens with the other)

Unusual emotional affect or emotional distortion

Time skips / non-linear time jumps

Inability to think properly

Focusing on some things too much and other things not at all

Realising there is a progression, that must include a heavy aftermath (unless you're trying to be special, or unless it's one of the few drugs that can make you feel unusually euphoric afterwards and then there's still usually a crash after that lmao)

Different drugs create different, known effects, however, people will have different 'bad drug trips' depending on their circumstances.

I'm a little bit afraid this post is going to crash so I'm going to post it now! And for that anon who asked me what kind of writing I used - this is it! :D

#pia on writing #writing techniques #dodgy advice #always use drugs responsibly folks #save the bad drug trips for #your characters #when you want to whump the fuck out of them #there are also OTHER ways you can write bad drug trips #this is just ONE way #but you can use some or all of these techniques #and they will help you a lot #imho these techniques will help in ANY high intensity scene writing #if you ever want to know more pls just shoot me an ask #and i'll do my best #if you don't know much about mind-altering drugs #please do your research

[eenochian]

it’s very funny how this fandom suddenly cares so much about sensitivity, meanwhile no one was up in arms about folks calling valeria shit like “cartel mommy” and simping for her. and, if you point this out, you get told that it’s “less important” or incomparable. way to tell victims of cartel violence that they don’t matter. y’all can’t preach about sensitivity and mindfulness while doing the exact opposite of that.

sensitivity is something that needed to be brought up a long time ago. people need to be mindful about the content they’re engaging with and producing. COD and its characters are based on very real issues and very real situations, mindfulness is needed for every single character.

seeing this only be brought up in the context of makarov and graves is honestly so, so frustrating. they’re not the only problematic characters that you need to consider when making content. western militaries like the US and UK are incredibly controversial and have devastated vulnerable people and their countries. price, ghost, soap, gaz— any member of the military, especially the special forces, is problematic. they’re not good people and should not be treated like saints, nor should they be idolized for what they do.

that all being said, the concepts of “be mindful and sensitive when making content” and “let people enjoy problematic media” can absolutely, 100%, co-exist. art is not meant to be a paradigm of moral goodness, it has always been a medium for people to explore things that are considered "taboo" in a safe space. there's a reason why "dead dove: do not eat" exists as a genre – with proper warning and precautions put in place, people can explore darker topics. for some, it's morbid interest. for others, it's a way of coping with trauma and experiences they've had in real life.

i want to repeat this just to make it very clear: be mindful and sensitive with the content you're producing. do not romanticize topics that should not be painted in a good light. don't minimize the impact of characters' actions or act like people are in the wrong for being uncomfortable with them. in this fandom especially, people treat atrocities like jokes because we're becoming desensitized to them. it's up to every individual to ensure that they don't forget how impactful a lot of this stuff is in real life. war is not a joke. terrorism is not a joke. people dying is not a joke. do not romanticize any of these things in your content, even if you're exploring the different sides of the people behind these things.

humanize the characters all you want. horrible people are still people, after all. humans are not one-dimensional beings. humanize them, but do not romanticize them.

be kind to victims, be sensitive, and be mindful about what you engage with. no one is perfect, no thing is perfect, but we can always do better. we need to approach every topic through this lens instead of picking and choosing who to support. everyone is deserving of it, everyone is entitled to basic respect. we don't need to compete and argue over who has it worse, we just need to be better across the board. support real victims. don't let media warp your perceptions of reality. be conscious of the content you make and consume.

#call of duty #cod #cod mw2 #mw2 #modern warfare #putting it in very clear words because i'm scared people may misinterpret what i'm saying: #for the love of god— LISTEN when people tell you that you're doing something wrong. #especially if these are victims or people knowledgeable of the topics you're portraying. #do your research. learn about the things you're writing or reading about. #do not portray bad people or harmful things in a positive light. #it's completely possible to “simp” for villains without disregarding or defending their actions. these characters are fictional. #it's better to get your rocks off to a set of pixels modeled after a normal person than a REAL person that does harm. #but be cognizant of what you're looking at when you do. #if you can support real victims— please do. #donate to ukraine. educate yourself on the war. learn about the harsh reality of cartels. study the impact of colonization and racism. #not only is it good to be informed of things in the real world— but it allows you to better understand these topics in the media. #i'm FAR from perfect. i'm not immune to doing wrong. i'm no exception to this criticism. #also wanted to throw this into the post but i may make another to address this specifically: #it is VERY telling that this fandom only started talking about sensitivity once (predominantly) white folks started being impacted by it. #no one cared about valeria being called “cartel mommy” or the cartel being romanticized. #graves gets criticized for being racist. but even he's often given a “pass” by the fandom.

[dreamofbecoming]

thinking about how my dad graduated high school in 1984 and went to college in boston, and he used to stay up late to snag free tickets on the college radio station to basement shows with like. the cars and fuckin. john gorka and shit. and how he used to hang out at coffee shops and bars and listen to tracy chapman play right before she made it big.

thinking about steve and eddie visiting nancy at emerson and catching a coffee shop open mic. thinking about how fast car would probably hit them both like a truck, for similar and also different reasons.

just thinking.

#my dad’s music tastes are. let’s call them eclectic #lots of folk lots of dad rock but also throw some punk and early grunge in there #and some broadway soundtracks for good measure #i grew up on tracy chapman and the indigo girls and steely dan and the pixies and the talking heads #and something about him being the same age as steve and eddie makes all my steddie musings feel v personal #like whatever dumb 80s teen shit i imagine my blorbos doing is also stuff my actual father was literally doing #i should ask him questions for fic research lmao #anyway. steddie. fast car. it would be a thing #failed love abandoned dreams never getting out of your small town ending up like your parents #you can’t tell me that wouldn’t fuck them both up to high heaven #i’m right you know i’m right

[good--merits-accumulated]

(slaps your todd) this bad boy can fit so many daddy issues in him

#dead poets society fic #dead poets society #(slaps your neil. this bad boy can fit arguably more daddy issues in him.) #(slaps your charlie. this bad boy can fit so much queerplatonic pining in him.) #(slaps myself. this guy can fit insane levels of catholic guilt into a world where christianity is irrelevant.) #seriously cameron keeps sneaking off behind the back of my pen to do confessional or some shit #shut up dude #ALSO. can we see the dunnett creeping into my style! because i sure can! #it was going to happen at some point wasn't it #<< overarching context to ALL OF THIS: researching the fair folk au and i'm being brainrot about it #tristan writes

[the-fae-folk]

are faeries capable of love?

A wonderful question. But it's much more difficult to answer than you might think. First we must define Love, and that, dear one, is something that has confounded humanity for time out of mind. To make things a bit easier, let's return to some distinctions I've made in the past. There are several categories we can place some of these featured human experiences into. These are: Emotions, Sensations, Thoughts, Ideas, Memories, and Imaginings. Emotions are quick. Fleeting. Born of chemical and physical responses they last a few minutes at most on their own. When you experience anger, that doesn't mean that you are angry. When you experience sadness, that doesn't mean that you are sad. But emotions rarely come on their own. Often times you experience multiple emotions at once, or one after another. Sometimes the same emotion again and again, or other times it is different emotions all tangled up. Sensations are physical responses of the body. A sensation of hunger, a sensation of nausea, a sensation of wind on the skin, a sensation of pain from a skinned knee. We also have a sensation of sight. A sense, a sensation. Sense organs all over our fantastically complex bodies feed us all kinds of information constantly, whether we are aware of it or not. A sense of balance, or a sense of danger, or a sense that a person is "Wrong" somehow are all sensations fed to us by our various sense organs and interpreted by the mind, even though we don't always understand their origin or purpose in the moment. Thoughts come next. Thoughts are complex, made up of memories, ideas, and imaginings. Things we have seen and done and sensed in our lives. Things we can conjure into existence that did not happen or do not exist in our physical world. And all the countless combinations and processes we can put to work in our minds to find solutions to whatever we are faced with. These are thoughts. Experiences crystalized in memory, imaginings woven from all we know into new forms, and ideas that we can build wonders from. Last of all is Feelings. Feelings are some of the most complex things imaginable. Cascades of emotions and sensory sensations to experience along with all kinds of thoughts and ideas. Feelings are the things we know in the long term. They often contain emotions, or cause them, but they do not need them. You can have feelings without having emotions. Love is one such feeling. Emotions such as Intimacy and Passion are some of the most commonly found in the makeup of Love. Passion to truly like and be interested or even excited about a person, not necessarily in a sexual or desiring way, you can be passionate about anything you truly enjoy or are interested in. Intimacy in this case refers to a closeness, a desire to be open or transparent to someone, to leave oneself vulnerable to them, to have them know you as you know yourself. Sometimes you will find other emotions such Desire or Care. Desire is a powerful one, it can come in many forms, though one of the more well known ones are desire for power, or desire for the sensations that come with sex. Care is different, care is an emotion that drives us to want to be there for someone, to protect them, to provide whatever we can that they need or want. Care is an emotion of devotion to another's well-being. But there are other things involved in Love as well that are not emotions at all. There is Understanding, or a willingness to learn how to understand. There is often the spark of novelty and challenge as we find ourselves challenged to be our best selves in thought and deed for those we care for. Some experience the sensations of sex and the emotions that come from it, and a large number even enjoy it. Above all, however, is the inclusion of Choice. To make the choice to act upon emotions we might have, to experience, or not to experience, sensations we might have a desire for. The choice to look and learn to understand a person who is not us and in many ways is nothing like us, a totally separate person. A choice to look at a person and see them as they are, flaws and virtues in one being, all the strangeness and beauty inherent in the physical bodies that we humans have. Not a perfect being who can do no wrong, nor a wretch who can never be good no matter what they do. A person, complex and utterly fluid in nature as we ourselves. And we must choose, for that, you see, is Love. Choice. Making the choice to care and to understand, making the choice to act upon emotions and sometimes to encourage those emotions further, prompting more. Love is like a dance, moving in time to music that is ever changing, ever evolving. You must use all that you have to see how your next step in the dance should go. And if you misstep, it is the choice to keep dancing anyway. But every dance has at least one other. Another who also makes a choice. The choice to care or understand you. To act upon emotions or sensations. The choice to be intimate and vulnerable with you. Love is just as much allowing those you care for to choose as it is making your own choices. This is why they sometimes say to let love go, in the hopes that it will return to you and be yours truly. They speak of the choice that the other must make. It would be foolish to assume there is only one way that love appears to all who experience it. Love is different for each, containing different emotions in different combinations, wildly different thoughts, sensations of all kinds. It is a feeling of many faces, but choice is always at the heart of love that is true. The choices a parent must allow their children as they grow older, even if those choices may lead to mistakes or sadness sometimes. The choice that ever true lover has offered to another, the freedom to consent or not to as they will, and the choice to respect their choices. The Choice to form bonds, connections, with others for no other reasons than the fact that you are passionate about them or intimate or care for them. Friendships can be a powerful form of love when they are true. There are other feelings that are very close to love, but do not contain the Choice. That do not understand. That only mimic, or act out of desire for control or for sex. Feelings of intense intoxicating passion that blinds the eyes and muddies the waters of reason. Many of these feelings, though they can masquerade almost perfectly in Love's place, are poison to the soul and mind, and all who endure them whether knowingly or not, are slowly slowly broken by them. Without the gift of choice, the choice of caring for another, and at least a desire to understand if not understanding itself, then it is not love... But your question was not of the nature of love, it was whether the Folk were capable of love, and I say... yes. They are. It matters not if their emotions are nothing like ours, or if they are similar but different in strange or intense ways. The most vitally important aspects of what Love is, are not bound by emotion, though they are often reached by means of emotion. Even still, it is likely that the Faeries do have emotions that are the same or similar as the ones we need. Many have care for those in their charge. Human pets, or a favored slave, or an adopted (usually stolen) human child. And it's undeniable that a good many certainly seem to feel some kind of care for their own children, most of the time. They also are fully capable of intimacy, as many a mortal lover or a faerie friend can attest. A closeness, an openness. However it is difficult to truly gain this, as their entire people and world seems to be that of a silent game, searching for weaknesses and playing with courts as one does a chessboard. Ruthlessly removing any opponent from your path as you aim for your goals. Deceit without lies, words that are twisted, and hearts that have become cruel or delight in pranks of the mean-spirited kind. It would be a dangerous place to allow for intimacy, and it would take a great deal to convince someone to let you know them. And thus Understanding too takes time. Fortunately the Folk have time without end to grow close, to understand, and to care. Even sometimes for humans. But many miss that single vital element without which love cannot even be. They make all kinds of choices of their own, but they neglect to allow for the choices of the other. And thus, it is not quite Love, though it is close. Bewitchment, illusions, deceptions, threat of force, intimidation, even torture... all have been used upon mortals and even other Fae to coerce them into something like love, but is not truly Love. And often enough, the victims do not ever realize the truth of the matter, and are happy enough with their lives ever after. Sometimes both the forced and the one forcing will make excuses, justifications, convincing even themselves that this was best. And yet, it is not Love. Yes, the Fae are certainly capable of Love. And they do Love truly, but more rarely than Humans. Though rare too is human love, it is more frequent and true than you might believe, more real than many understand, and more elusive than any would hope. All are capable of Love. Human, Faerie. But they don't always choose it. Love is not blind, yet people are swayed so often by that which masquerades as love, and so they say that love is blind, never truly knowing that what blinded them was not love at all, but poison.

#love #fae #faerie #otherfolk #fae folk #choice #emotions #feelings #intimacy #understanding #the nature of love #the nature of choice #humans #human #remember. im a writer and scholar of folklore #this is not a good source for knowledge of human biology or neurology #always do your research

[geniusphilester]

wait is poppers that sex drug that makes your anus extremely relaxed

i am fascinated

i'm getting a good chuckle that this is my legacy ngl. (also here's phil's recent reference, if anyone missed it.)

short answer: yes. longer answer: my understanding is that it also causes a general euphoric high and also tends to fall under grayer areas of legality than other party substances (here's one article about it in the uk, although it's a few years old at this point), so there are reasons people who aren't looking to have anal would use it. that it would help with anal certainly doesn't hurt its rep in gay party circles, though.

#definitely do your own research if you're curious though #i have no firsthand experience and have only done some light reading and watched the first queer as folk us lol #3 #4 #5 #ask #my ramblings #...i think i need a #poppers tag

[ban-joey]

sending laser beams to my professor with my mind. kenneth you said midterm grades would b up by this afternoon. it is officially TONIGHT and guess what? kenneth i would love to not be clenching my teeth in my sleep tonight. kenneth i will be sending you a bill in the mail. yes i know its probably a TAs responsibility but i blame you personally. i hate school

#i dont im having a lot of fun (genuinely) but it is often pretty stressful #did find out there are a few folks adjacent to my program doing zoonoses & climate change research so im very excited to chat w them next w #possibly directing my thesis towards one health. social epi gradually becoming less interesting #plus i think my strengths do lie in applying epi to biological concepts so. one health works there #my brain continually trying to get back to lyme disease :( sometimes i really do miss the east coast tbh! #not lying actually i think the number one thing i miss is the amt of vector borne disease research LMFAO #i do unfortunately kind of have a crush on a classmate so that's fine but whatever. grad school. men are nice to me and i lose my mind ig #need to go make out w a hot trans person i think that would solve my problems rn #but also it's nice to be so excited about someone deciding to sit next to me in every class :) #like wow how isolated have i been the last 3 years to be so delighted by like. active signs i have Officially Made Friends. #even if he does live like a block away from my dad and jokes every goddamn day like 'so i saw your dad yesterday' no you DIDNT shut UP #idk yesterday he sat right next to me in a class he usually sits w other people in and it sort of sent my brain off the edge and now im jus #yeah. sitting with this one. it's fine like it's normal. but wowie i do think it's my first time having a Big Ol Crush since (redacted) #a little scary for my animal brain i think but it's okay! #im 25 in like 3 ish weeks and i still get embarrassed about this stuff somehow? stupid. #he's just really nice and always really fun to talk to! i think i had to officially Sit With Myself today bc epi is doing a holiday party #and there's a baking contest and we were talking abt it in class and i was indecisive abt whether i want to participate #and he like fully cut me off and was like oh you should bake something so i can have some :) #and. well fuck now i have to lmao. IM SO EASY IT'S SO EMBARRASSING #good evening everyone. guess this is my journal now. anyway ken rice you owe me twenty dollars and i aim to COLLECT

[liesonthefloordramatically]

the #1 thing that improved my confidence speaking Japanese was transcribing interviews, because it turns out that EVERYONE'S grammar's imperfect when they're speaking

anyway, I am now having to read a whole bunch of handwritten documents and my confidence in my Japanese handwriting is through the roof (and NOW I understand why I have gotten so many compliments on it--it's not PRETTY but it's READABLE which is better than some of the documents I'm having to read)

#what is my academic life #Queenie actually says something on this blog #most folks wrote pretty clearly but there are a few people who I'm like. what happened here with you. #anyway it's break ('break') so I'm doing research (getting emotional about research) and I'm going to make it everyone else's problem #eta: my research materials are inevitably things that make me cry (most bigoted pamphlet you've seen in your life) #or things that make me cry (someone writing a comment card saying my research made them feel less alone)

[rock-a-noodle]

Can right wing news PLEASE stop lying about LeVar Burton calling out anti-LGBTQIA+ groups trying to ban books in school and making him out to be some whackjob threatening to fight people banning "porn" in children's libraries (by porn they actually mean stories with LGBTQIA+ themes and other information that conservatives throw hissy fits at)?

That would be great, thanks.

#shut up kelly #levar burton #but seriously #fuck your anti crt fuck your unnecessary book bans and fuck your “don't say gay” bills and fuck your prejudices and do your damn research #and see what queer folk are going through #venting a tad #okay more than a tad #homophobia #transphobia

[pceexistsinthevoid]

imagine if transphobic legislators were logically consistent with their "concern about regrets relating to medical transition care" and banned knee replacements and breast cancer treatments and prostate cancer treatments and *checks notes* every other medical procedure or treatment because there's An Amount of people who regret some or all of the treatment

#they will never be logically consistent of course #it's not the point of what they're doing #though of note: all of the things listed above have at least 10x the regret rate that transition care has been found to have #(from my research but obviously do your own) #transphobia #fuck transphobia #transphobes are pathetic #current state of US trans rights (or lack therof) #and not that this should have to be said but don't blame detrans folks because their narratives get coopted like this #the fact that some detrans folks become transphobic after is not an indictment on detransitioning #we support detrans folks here too #these things are compatible

[thedeadthree]

AYRENN URTHEMIEL (the exile) // VERLAINE VICENTE (the golden rose)

MINA MORGANTHAU (when twilight strikes) // VIORELE IORGOVAN (vtm: parliament of knives)

the loveliest @leviiackrman tagged me to do this cutest template for some of my ocs! ty so much jess! 🖤

tagging: @griffin-wood, @blackreaches, @confidentandgood, @chuckhansen, @risingsh0t, @marivenah, @queennymeria, @preachercuster, @jackiesarch, @yennas, @saintsilver, @shellibisshe, @cobb-vanthss, @loriane-elmuerto, @blissfulalchemist, @arklay, @adelaidedrubman, @florbelles, @belorage, @amistrio, @steelport, @nokstella, @rosebarsoap, @celticwoman, @sunsetseasons, @aceghosts, @hoesephseed, @jacobseed and you!

#only if you want to of course! 🌿💚 #catching up on some tags! ✨🥺 thank you again jess this was the cutest!!!!! #im super late to this if you’ve done this already as well please feel free to ignore 🤍🤧 #im especially looking by how fitting the songs are for ayrenn and verlaine AHH #ayrenns for sure captures the painted phoenix and the persona she portrayed to the public! especially her opponents! #and cowboy like me……… verlaine and rafs song it’s theirs now they’ve claimed it THATS IT ✨😤 #‘youre a cowboy like me / perched in the dark / telling all the rich folks anything they wanna hear / i could be the way forward’ #‘perched in the dark / telling all the rich folks anything they wanna hear / like it could be love / i could be the way forward ->’ #‘only if they pay for it / your a bandit like me / eyes full of stars / hustling for the good life / never thought I’d meet you here.’ #SCEPTER RED ifykyk on vioreles clan sksnjxjx ✨😌 i was looking through the Pantone colors and came across it! it was so fitting! ✨😌 #and i really do love Mina’s aesthetic sm ✨🥺 her and Eddie if they lived in the same verse would be besties for sure ✨😌 #leg.tagged #leg.ocs #leg.edit #ill catch up on the rest tomorrow my brain is a fried egg ✨🤧 #but jess! Ty so much for the tag this was so lovely to do for the loves! 🖤🥺 #these also took me a SECOND to research into flower symbolism/ colors / AND animals and the music but i loved doing these! #blood tw #smoking tw #just in case! #IF I MISSED ANYONE PLEASE TAKE THIS AS UR TAG ✨🥺

[friendofthecrows]

I don't think you guys get how scientifically some "witchcraft" MUST be taken or else you can face serious side effects (I am specifically talking about things that deal with herbs, minerals, or other chemical components, especially when they are meant to be ingested, applied to the skin, or inhaled).

Like, I'm locally known for my tea witchcraft, which anyone who has looked into it might more accurately call herbology or a mix of folk knowledge and biochemistry. I stay as up to date as I can on the research, and for things that there isn't enough research for at the moment but have been used for a certain ailment for centuries, I meticulously document every use, the exact procedure and recipe, and any reported effects whether they on the surface seem relevant or not.

I'm reminded of this because of the covid that has been passing around the household, and all the remedies I've been making for one symptom or another, conscious of everyone's health issues and medication. My dad says, "thank you for taking care of everyone, Hal." and I say, "no problem! :)" queue me returning downstairs for almost an hour of washing chemistry equipment.

On tumblr on the rare occasions I share any herb-based stuff I learn, it's all pretty mild. I avoid potent shit that you really need to be careful with. But note that when you get really into it, you start to realize that a lot of the more effective stuff is toxic in larger doses. Because it's like medicine. It's chemically based and it has a potent, significant effect on the human body. You can't take too much. Now, I don't mess around with that stuff irl either unless I am 100% certain of what I'm doing and the situation calls for that level. I also forage for most of my herbs/mushrooms/mosses/etc, and sometimes, the stuff I have access to is the stuff you've got to be careful with.

Did you know that foxglove is great for treating congestive heart failure and atrial fibrillation? It's used to make a prescription drug called digoxin for that specific purpose. It's also really fucking toxic, far too much to mess with it at home. More dangerously, the information on the benefits of foxglove is just a google search away! I chose a really obvious example for this, but if you just fill an infuser with any given plant that's supposed to help with [issue] and steep it, no carefully determined dilutions, temperatures (for either the denaturing of certain proteins or preventing the release of certain chemicals) and very specific steep times (mostly to prevent the release of too high of dosage toxic chemicals) you might find yourself in the emergency room or in the ground. Best case just sick for a few days. Or you might happen to be right and feel so much better!

But the point is, you've got to take this stuff seriously if your resident witch/herbologist/homeopathic healer is, and if they're not, avoid participation or do a shit ton of research on your own to make sure it's safe first. If you're doing it on your own, research, record results carefully, ask questions of those who know more, and be prepared to stop any herbal treatment you start. Don't be arrogant.

(I kid you not, my brother is banned from the tea shelves since one time (for context he has tachycardia) he made himself a strong infusion of yerba mate as a study aid, which he knew to do because I make it for myself as a study aid (not now that I'm on adderall) and for those of you who don't know, it's a stimulant thanks to frankly insane amounts of caffeine *when made traditionally* (more than coffee, which my brother is not allowed to have thanks to his tachycardia). Needless to say this ended in an ER trip. (He was ultimately okay, don't worry).)

#oh it's just some herbs! #i'm very sick of people treating herbology like it's just silly beliefs that be can be taken very lightly #like yeah sure. did you check if they interfere with your medication? did you check dosage? #were you super careful to dilute it properly and steep it at the right temperature? #no? #well no shit you're experiencing side effects dumbass #just culturally #none of you take this seriously and spreading that mentality that people should just experiment with this stuff #only some of you push the reality that you have to be careful #it's not silly and any responsible herbologist will do research #please be one of the people who does research and does NOT spread the idea that it's all #'uwu witchy herb correspondences i know cause i saw a list of medicinal herbs for virgos with chronic pain on tumblr' #'measurements? i trust my intuition baybee <3' #sure that's fine with sage and garlic and peppermint and shit #but please #if you have not heard of an herb before in the context of normal culinary use #do NOT order a package of it online or look for it in your woods and then steep yourself a cup of it with no research #eventually that will bite you in the ass #I see a concerning amount of people spreading the idea that anything folk-knowledge based should AUTOMATICALLY NOT BE TREATED SERIOUSLY #wrong reaction #no you shouldn't use it as your sole treatment for a serious ailment #and no you shouldn't accept everything uncritically #but don't treat it lightly as if 'it's all fake anyways lol' #i'm gonna fucking murder someone #and i know the mushrooms to do it with #'oh what's in this' 'just some magical ingredients uwu' *it has amanita and you die in several days after an unassuming stomach ache* #i'm sorry this turned into a rant #genuinely meant to just type a short witty thing on it but that didn't happen #it also turned into a #long post

[dhampir-dyke]

I'm so awful at orienting new people idk why they keep giving them to me. Like truly I suck at it

#and i cant tell if its ME being a bad preceptor or if my orientee just sucks/isnt ready for hospital healthcare #so much of this shit is just a matter of commen sense to me that it doesnt occur to me that some folks are absolutely clueless #and like!!! if i dont know i go find out! i ask! i research! #like if i dont know how or why or when to do something i just ask. but a lot of people will just NOT DO IT. WHICH IS BAD IN HEALTHCARE. #its hard bc so many of them REFUSE to take initiative. i have to really push them to do anything and instead of just doing it #themselves the next time- i have to push them to do it AGAIN #and its frustrating for me bc these arent customers. theyre some really sick people. if you get a blood sugar of 460 on your patient i feel #like its just basic common sense to tell a nurse. or if your patient has ripped out an IV. etc i could go on forever. #idk man. i got trained for all of 3 days and then got tossed into the deep end to fend for myself- i just figured it out! i used my #shitty critical thinking skills and watched my nurses and figured it out. #and like. so many people think the hospital is so easy. its not. #you have to clean up feces/urine/blood/vomit/mucus. you have to use needles on people. you are EVENTUALLY gonna see a person die and you ar #then gonna have to clean them up and bag #their belongings and put them in a bodybag. you are gonna have victims of violence AND perpetrators of it #and its okay if its hard!!!! it is!!!! but you still have to do it. it might not get easy but if you refuse to do these things then you #probably shouldnt work healthcare #for your sake and the people you are suppose to be taking care of

[writingpuddle]

there is something so fundamentally tumblr about hitting a follower milestone because 18 pornbots just followed you

#happy 1000 followers i know some of you are real #and happy blocked to the nice ladies in swimsuits im sorry youre not real #not aftg #personal #been so mia on this blog its genuinely surprising when i get new followers like #i make one original post a month and grad school has been kicking my ass so hard i barely have time to write #one more semester folks then classes are over and i get to do research forever