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#doesn’t this just give u the calmest feeling?
toruro · 1 year
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hyung line + fighting with them
w/c: 1.7k
a/n: maybe i'll do a maknae line later, we'll see! part two of them making up can be found here! hope u enjoy!
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seungcheol
he really tries his best to not get *super* heated because he knows he loses his temper easily. trying to stop small arguments is kind of futile but you both are some what playful when it comes to those petty fights which are unavoidable. it’s the rarer, more serious fights like the one you’re having tonight which he tries to prevent. yelling in each other’s faces is never what you want but it’s inevitable sometimes. you know he doesn’t mean what he’s saying, you’re sure of it, but you can’t help but let the harsh words get to your head. once it’s all catching up to you, you’re finding it hard to bite back, hard to find the voice in you to yell more, hard to find it in you to say anything at all. after seungcheol’s finished with the tangent he’s on, he notices how you’ve stilled. giving you a moment to respond, the silence gives you both a moment to let your emotions to sink in properly. after a few minutes of silence, both of calming down your breathing and tears, seungcheol will talk again. “baby i’m sorry.” you’re quiet for a moment before you take a deep breath. “let’s talk about this in the morning,” you finally say, “i think we’ve both said enough tonight.” he nods in agreement as you turn on your heel to grab a blanket and pillow from your shared room, but he catches on quickly. “don’t sleep on the couch. i’ll sleep on the couch,” he tells you, pulling the pillow from your hands. you pull them back, “no, you hate sleeping there.” his heart nearly melts. “okay, then just sleep on the bed with me,” he reasons, “please?” even if you’re angry, you know you can’t say no.
jeonghan
i believe him and minghao would be the calmest in an argument, no matter how heated it gets. he's a bit goofy and playful at times, but when he notices that this argument is one of Those Arguments he'd switch it up, being very careful with his words and their impact. would have you both sit down at the dinner table or something like that where you guys could face each other and whenever you're talking and he notices you start talking faster, more angrily, more heated, he'll reach out a hand and encourage you to slow down. you're still a bit angry but how can you feel anything but endearment when he's doing everything in his power to understand you? i really can't imagine an argument with jeonghan where you're both yelling and he says anything he regrets, just because he'd be so perceptive and strict with himself about the course of your argument. sometimes though, he understand that some issues take more time to be resolved BUT if you even suggest the idea of you sleeping in a different room, he'll be very against it, insisting that wherever you're sleeping, he's sleeping.
joshua
big arguments with joshua are rare. he tries to diffuse any situation before they get out of hand—out of hand much like this one. after he loses his cool, things will be come very heated very fast. joshua knows you well—too well—and he’ll definitely strike where it hurts, throwing out words he wouldn’t imagine saying if he was in his right mind. you’re not used to joshua like this, and you’re not sure how to handle it, doing your best to not relent. it's when he's spitting out something that you'd never think he'd ever say that you'd go quiet, letting his words sink in to both of your minds. you're wiping away at your cheeks, furiously trying to get your tears to stop because you're mind is just so clouded and scrambled that you can hardly think. "baby, i—" joshua's voice is softer the next time he speaks after realized just exactly what he's said, but you cut him off. "i'm—" you start with a shaky breath, "—i'm gonna sleep on the couch tonight." joshua physically winces at your proposition but he also knows that he brought this upon himself, so he doesn't protest, rather collecting himself and using his time alone tonight to think about how to approach this situation the next morning.
jun
does not shut up in arguments. like he will be so vocal about his emotions and will say everything that he’s feeling and everything that he’s thinking to the point that it's quite literally obnoxious. you'll be trying to get your point across but he's cutting you off with his own words, and it's not even intentional, he just starts spewing out shit when he's angry. it takes you a long few minutes of you being completely silent, trying to take in everything he's saying to you before jun realizes that maybe, just maybe, he's gone overboard and should shut up right about now. it's not the easiest for him to not say everything he's thinking and it's not easy for you comprehend everything he's saying so you're both sort of just standing there before you turn and go to the kitchen to grab yourself a glass of water. jun follows after you quickly but would do his best to try not to say anything. when you propose that you'll sleep on the couch tonight, he isn't sure what to think, and is about to go on another rampage before stopping himself. he's not fond of the idea, but definitely thinks you both need some time to cool down. he'll try to convince you to take the bed but your refuse, insisting that he's too tall to fit on the couch.
soonyoung
he's like jun in the sense that he'll say almost everything that comes to mind except he's much more calculated about it. it's less of him just saying random shit that's going through his head and more of him not having a filter. he won't hold back the mean words that he definitely wouldn't say if even half of his brain was functioning. he'd throw his hands in the air a lot, using his arms to emphasize the words that he's saying and you know he doesn't intent to be scary but with the way he's yelling and you're yelling and everything is so emotional, you're quite frankly intimidated. you know he'd never ever hurt you but in the heat of the moment, you find yourself almost cowering back in the midst of your argument. it takes hoshi a few minutes to even comprehend your figure, let alone realize that you're intimidated—intimidated by him—before it feels like a slap in the fucking face by the universe. he's suddenly thrown into reality, growing quiet as he realizes just how the past hour has escalated into something neither of you wanted. it's hard for him to calm down—he's just always so emotional, and you love that about him, but it's a lot. eventually, it'll just be quiet as you look at each other, and after a few moments he'll reach out a hand and you'd immediately hold his. he'd say something about talking about this in the morning and you'd just nod along as you both make your way to the bedroom.
wonwoo
thinks A LOT so all of his responses are thought through. well, almost all. i can imagine wonwoo trying to becalm and collected in any argument with you just because he hates conflict and will do his best to make sure this doesn't get out of hand. despite this, you are his weakness in like every way possible, not excluding this one. something about the way both of your voices are being raised steadily and the words you're both saying are starting to become less thought through and god does wonwoo try to keep his composure, he really does, but when things get heated he'd start yelling and then you'd start yelling and you'd both be crying until some point where he realizes enough is enough and that you guys can't hold up a proper conversation like this. he knows this argument will get you nowhere if you continue on like this, so he takes it upon himself to step down and propose that you talk about this in the morning. when you silently agree and go to your shared bedroom to grab a pillow and blanket, he catches on all too quickly, grabbing your wrist before you can set up on the couch. "don't," he pleads, and while you're still upset and heated, you can't ignore the raw emotion in his voice, sighing as you return to your bed, crawling with wonwoo by your side.
jihoon
petty arguments are normal. real ones like these are not. woozi prides himself for being generally composed in your relationship, hardly every losing his cool in situations like these. usually he's good at taming both your and his emotions, so it's not natural for things to end up like this. but in this case, both of you are pent up with so much frustration from god knows what and you just happen to be taking it out on each other. it's not okay, you both know that, but you're too stubborn to quit this battle of yelling you've got going on, and it's only when you find it harder for you to raise your voice that you begin to falter. you don't even realize that you've been yelling so much that your throat begins to hurt until you're taking a deep breath, being hit by a need for water. you leave the room in the middle of his response to you, going to the kitchen to grab yourself some water, which causes him to follow you afterwards, not halting his words. you've already been crying and you can tell his eyes are glossy too, and this is your moment of epiphany—this needs to stop. you don't let him say another word before putting your hand up tiredly, saying something along the lines of, "i can't do this right now and i don't think you can either." he'll shut his mouth real tight when he hears how hoarse your voice has gotten. "let's just talk in the morning," you suggest, trudging your way to your bed as he follows you, nodding in agreement as he crawls in next to you without a word.
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spookykoolkat · 8 months
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the red j.m. | chapter four
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CHAPTER FOUR: NO GOOD
series masterlist | main masterlist |
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pairings: older!joel miller x plus sized!younger!reader
chapter summary: you've been in jackson for a month now and things are still a little rough. you haven't found the right crowd to fit into yet, and thought maybe you might have to settle for the family of four you already know, until you meet your patrol partner, tyler. unfortunately, joel doesn't seem to like the idea of you with any other man but him.
warnings: 18+ age gap (joel is 57, reader is turning 26), inappropriate thoughts, sexual language, teasing, touching, slight jealous!joel, x-rated descriptions, crude language, perv!joel, creepy!joel, mean joel not too mean tho, MDNI!!!
wc: 6.2k
na: HI! thank you for alllll of the love oh my god my little gothic heart is so full i love you guys!!! i hope this series is everything and more to you guys bc i love this so much! hopefully as chapters go by, i get better in my writing and hope everyone enjoys it! i appreciate all of your kind words and interactions with me and making me feel welcome since i am new to writing on tumblr and kind of took a six year break from writing oneshots/fanfictions LOL. anyways please enjoy this chapter things are g3tting a little hot and heavy :P I CANT WAITT i hope that my writing is cathartic for my big girls we do not get enough representation for us in stories and writings!please enjoy! smut coming soon fr fr LMFAOO
i appreciate all reblogs, likes and comments feel free to do any one of those things or ALL! if u think its deserved :P
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DECEMBER 21ST, 2024
YOU
you’ve been in jackson for a month now. you couldn’t believe it, you truly had every doubt about staying even a week. but, it’s probably the calmest life you’ve lived in a very long time. you enjoyed it and you truly felt you’d made the right decision, it didn’t take much convincing either. but, you still haven’t unpacked the items maria gave you and continues to give you. just in case. 
the neighbors are learning your name, as you are with them, and they actually care. as much as you let them. you felt quite bad because you found yourself still not clicking with anyone around you. and you’ve tried. the people your age find you boring, almost a dark cloud over them, bursting their bubbles. younger kids only approach you because of ellie, asking for advice on stance and grip. the older group, around tommy and joel’s age, finds you a bit much. 
your language, your lack of social awareness–sometimes it gets embarrassing. saying something old heads wouldn’t necessarily like, being too blunt and a little explicit. joel figured you should hang around your age group, yet you didn’t really click in with the rest. he was far from embarrassed being around you, you just said the things he was thinking out loud.
you only found yourself clicking with joel. in many ways, as much as he let you. he was standoffish most of the time, barely cracking a smile at your weird habits and the noises you make when you’re passed out on the couch. he refused to let you break him, this wall that he had up to survive. do not get attached. he thought, maybe the less he knew you the less it’d hurt to have anything happen to you. but it seems even as little as he does know you, he’s still feeling that tug at his heart laying his eyes on you. 
it was too late. whoops.
joel doesn’t want to address that feeling, and he doesn’t want to call it as it is. he actually cares about you. he had no choice but to call it that, because why else would he lie to you about finding cassettes in the house?— so that you didn’t know what he really did to get you whatever he could get his hands on. 
he didn’t want you to know that he actually smuggled in goods that he and his family needed, and while bribing, stealing, trading and selling for necessities, he made it a mission to find at least one cassette tape for you. he didn’t know you actually saw him red handed, and you still didn’t know where those boxes were coming from. he figured if you knew, you’d bring it up. 
he made it his mission for two whole weeks, after your first week of staying with him, and finally got his hands on some actual music for you. joel hadn’t made efforts like this in a long time, and he knew that denying the fact that he at least cared for you would mean he was being delusional. 
but he was always worried about you. you were his object of affection and he craved to find a way to get you out of his mind. he actually felt guilty for thinking about you in ways you’ve probably never been before, he felt guilty for wanting nothing but to make you feel good—however that was. 
you doubted it strongly of course, shaking the feeling off as your own delusion and insanity, but you always hoped. hoped that maybe his generosity and southern hospitality was actually him caring about you in a different way, but he was a grown man. you tried to off yourself in front of him–you were insane to think he’d even look at you as anything but a liability, he hardly looked your way as it was. 
at least you thought so.
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joel paid attention to every single thing he sees and hears. he doesn’t show it, he doesn’t acknowledge it—all he does is observe. some more than others. 
you didn’t talk to him unless he talked to you, you kept your distance like he wanted, but somehow he knew everything that was going on. he didn’t have to talk to you to know you, and that’s what he was ashamed of. he watched you. 
he was a creep, he felt like someone who was abnormal and making things weirder than they had to be. he was studying you and you didn’t even know. he picked up on what made you smile, which cassettes you listened to the most, which just so happened to be the ones he was ‘holding on to.’ and in the midst of observing you, he checked you out any time he got. 
when you weren’t looking mostly, but even sometimes when you were talking to him about something not so important. he realized that if you did see that his eyes wandered over you, you were probably gaslighting yourself into thinking he wasn’t doing exactly what you thought he was doing. he loved your body. and he loved the way you dressed your body, the way the shirts you wore always clung to your heavy breasts, how even when you dressed in baggy clothes he still wanted to ruin you like that. 
sick. you’re a sick old pervert, ya kno’ that? he knew. what joel didn’t know is why you made him feel this way, why you drove him to do the things that he does for you. why he acted feral every time you bent over, why he would storm out of the room when you got on your hands and knees to pick something you dropped up off the floor. 
but he also studied you because he wanted to make sure you weren’t feeling how you felt the night you woke up in jackson, to make sure you weren’t feeling depressed or like you didn’t want to be here anymore. just talk to her fucker. he couldn’t. he would never admit it, but he’s eavesdropped near ellie’s garage to hear conversations between the two girls. 
“ellie, i mean it, you cannot tell joel.” you hushed as you glanced towards the door, back to ellie. 
she scoffed. “like i’d tell him, lay it on me.” you noticed the irritation in her eyes when you brought up joel, asking yourself if maybe there was something that wasn’t being said. you just put a pin in it. 
“okay. one, i’m finally allowed a gun and i got my patrol route.” you cheered in a hush and joel almost pressed his ear into the door. 
ellie rolled her eyes, grabbing the piece of paper. “no fucking fair. good looks, telling me bad news first. what’s two?” she joked. 
“i met my patrol partner. his name’s uh, tyler? i think. yeah,” you looked down and nodded, assuring yourself. joel made it a note to tell ellie how thin her walls were, not right now though. 
“tyler… tyler m?” joel thought of every man in this town named tyler with the letter M as his last name. instantly made a mental list of five tylers. 
“i don’t know. but he asked me for a drink. tonight, he was gonna meet me here but i told him i’d meet him there. lesson number 5, always have a way to leave anywhere you are if you need to.” you said. you figured it’d be best to teach her as much as you could, telling her things she needed to hear to survive. 
that’s how joel knew immediately what was happening when he heard your soft singing from your cracked door. you were getting ready for him. he actually hated it. he couldn’t remember the last time he felt that heat in his chest, biting the tongue—it wasn’t until his face turned down into the old familiar feeling, what he recognized as jealousy. 
who was he to be jealous? for what? it was a saturday night, most people were off of work, and everyone was settling in the town’s circle to drink and watch movies. everyone but joel. he was now classified as a bitter old man, with a dark whiskey in his glass. maybe now a bitter, creepy old man as he knocks slightly on the cracked door and you invite him in. 
you were fixing the laces on your shoes, simple black converse, and his eyes made his way up from there to your face. a deep v neck shirt that looked like a second skin from how tight it was, and faded black jeans with tiny holes from being lived in that hugged the fat of your thighs. he never noticed the gold dainty necklace that sat in the middle of your chest, but it sits right between the curves of your breasts. were they always that big? he felt like a kid, ogling and asking stupid questions.  
“hellooo? joel?” you called to him as you rested your palms on the width of your thighs. he saw your lips, coated in a sheen and your hair split down the middle instead of being in a pony tail or bun. creepy old man. you’re being creepy joel!!! he shook his head. 
“headin’ to the circle?” he asked. if he were close enough you could smell the whiskey on his breath. 
“yeah i-,” you thought for a minute. joel didn’t trust the next person as much as you did. you saw his protectiveness through ellie, you felt maybe he’d feel the same for you. even if you were a bit delusional. 
“-was gonna catch a movie with ellie, most likely be back around 12.” you said as you glanced at the clock, 9:32. 
“‘s that right?” he said suggestively, like he knew something you didn’t. he did. 
“yeah. that’s right,” you stood firm, even shot him a dirty look. “why don’t you enjoy the night, joel. you got the house to yourself, ain’t that what you’ve been mopin’ around for?” you stood up and grabbed your gun to put in your waistband behind your shirt, sticking a knife in your high top converse and one in your jean pocket. 
maybe you got too defensive, but you were right in a way. he looked miserable around the house, storming in just to grab a beer and lock himself in the library or room. 
“that’s right,” he was just smug. so smug you couldn’t stand it, you wanted to slap him. 
“whatever joel,” you wanted to be right so bad. you wanted to prove to even yourself that you were right. but neither of you were buying into this act you played, and you knew it. he was making you nervous with his stare, the hard shell you had was practically ripped off of you when he grabbed your wrist before you left the room. he held you, shoulder to shoulder and looked at your face, down your neck and to your chest. 
“if you need anythin’, you let me know darlin’.” darlin’? it was so foreign to you, so alien that you didn’t even have time to process it before your mouth moved to say a small alright and taking your arm from his grip. when you did, it was cold and you could feel the print of his hand around your wrist down the stairs. 
it was so different, something that leaked off of his words when he spoke to you. and you wanted to hear more of it, explore that with him. 
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before you could psych yourself out of going through the bar’s doors, you heard someone call for your name and turned your head to the left to see tyler, walking towards you with a big grin on his face. tyler was just two years older than you, someone you met while you were in combat and patrol classes, and didn’t acknowledge until he approached you, re-introducing himself as your partner for the first two weeks. you couldn’t be cold and shoo him away, you just smiled and introduced yourself, really looking at him. 
he was not joel miller. tyler’s skin wasn’t as tan as joel’s but he wasn’t pale, and he was actually a bit lanky even under the thick coats he layered. you noticed that his chest wasn’t as broad and strong as joel’s, hell his arms were smaller than yours. he was a skinny tall thing, while you were a bit short and thick everywhere. and when he embraced you lightly at the entrance of the bar, you just felt cold. no warmth, no comfort, you felt like you’d break him. 
“hey, i was hoping you’d actually come.” he breathed in as he pulled away, still, it wasn’t feeling right. 
“why wouldn’t i?” 
“cause you’re out of my league,” he said with a seductive smile and you wanted to believe him. wanted to enjoy the night as it comes and maybe have a few drinks, talk. but your mind was on a bitter man who sat in a house all by his lonesome. 
the thing about ‘dates’ now is that small talk doesn’t happen anymore. what’s your mom like? she’s dead actually. really? mine too! it was pointless. if you ended up here, you knew that you were alone. 
it wasn’t long before you and tyler were sitting on two stools, side by side. your knees were in between his as the two of you talked, flirted, gave simple touches. you were having fun. doing what would seem normal at a bar, just enjoying the company of someone who actually liked you. 
“how come you’ve never hung out with anyone else? i never see you with anyone.” he said, his fingers tapping on your knee. 
“mmm, i’m just not for everyone.” you flirted, covering his fingers with yours. you knew this wasn’t going anywhere, but you’d like to live in it just a little longer. the touch of a man, someone who desired you even if it wasn’t how you wanted. something you started to crave from joel. 
“maybe you’re just for me then?” he suggested, and you decided to just play into it. it was kind of hard not to when you were thinking of joel, you needed to act out on it. 
“i doubt that, honey,” you said, tugging at the collar of his shirt. he smelled like tequila and grass, something not that appealing but you ignore it. you wanted something out of him tonight, because for some reason the words joel spoke to you kept ringing in your ears. if you need anything, you let me know darlin’. the words rumbled through your body and straight to your core, because if there’s anything you need he could definitely be of help. 
you didn’t know how long you stayed at this bar, teasing and touching each other until you felt the ache in your core, aching for a touch that you’ve had once before. but you didn’t give a shit about purity or virginity, you wanted the ache gone and you knew tyler was the best bet. 
“tyler,” you whispered in his ear as the bar started to empty. 
“yes, beautiful?” he answered and slid his hand up your thigh. 
“show me how good you are with your fingers, yeah?” 
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he followed you back to joel’s, hand in hand as you turned the key to the house and softly opened the door to prevent the creaking. granted, you didn’t think this through, like everything else. maybe you should’ve gone to his. you cringed a bit, walking inside. 
it was dark inside, nothing but the sizzle of a freshly put out fire. you put your fingers to your lips to shush him, taking him slowly upstairs and to your room. you couldn’t help but find yourself glancing at joel’s door, which is cracked open. 
you finally made it to your room with the lanky man groping your body and trying to slither you out of your jeans, letting him. 
“only want your fingers, okay? if not you can leave.” you established as you stood in your panties and tight shirt. 
“fuck, yeah that’s okay,” tyler himself was craving a woman’s touch, he didn’t even care if he got off. he just wanted to see you, a woman’s body, to feel you. 
“can i touch you? like anywhere?” he asked as he sat on the edge of your bed, his cock already hardened against his pants. it didn’t sound right coming from him. you wondered what it’d sound like with the texas twang you craved to hear from a certain man. 
it still made your core twinge a bit, remembering the last time you were this vulnerable. you couldn’t lie, even if it wasn’t what you wanted, you fell in to the odd touch of the man desperately trying to touch you. 
“anywhere. keep your dick in your pants, i’ll touch as i go if you want me to.” you moved over to him and crawled into your bed, and he slipped in next to you as he propped himself on his elbow to look at you. 
“you’re so pretty, really.” he said, genuinely and you smiled. your stomach even fluttered a bit. it’s been a long time hearing that, hearing desire. 
“touch me, please.” 
tyler took his time, a little more than you’d liked but he was busy distracted with the way your tits pushed up to your chin, like you were suffocating. touching and teasing, his touch felt good but it still didn’t feel right, it didn’t feel heartstopping. maybe you’re expecting too much. 
but he didn’t talk to you when he dipped his hand in your panties, you just heard his whimpers and panting as he rutted his hard on into the side of your fat thigh, barely focused on you. you weren’t feeling it anymore, your wetness wasn’t even directed towards him really. everything you did with him was what you wanted to do with joel. you weren’t interested anymore and it started to feel wrong, it never felt good because tyler wasn’t worried about you. just his nut, and you didn’t like that. you didn’t like to feel used. 
“okay, wait, wait—i said wait!” you said and grabbed his wrist, pulling it from your panties and moving off of the bed. 
“wait, fuck i’m sorry, i was just so, fuck i’m so sorry.” he said a bit loudly, and you swore you heard a creak in the hallway as you moved to the door. 
“it’s okay, i just, i’m not–i’m tired. i think you should go.” you said, hugging your arm as he adjusted himself in his pants and got up. 
“i’m sorry, i,-” he tried again and you waved him off. 
“it’s done and forgotten, you didn’t do anything you were just really into it. i wasn’t.” you were careful with your words, not as tough as you would be because you’re vulnerable. but he wouldn’t get far if he hurt you, you knew that. 
“i’m sorry, goodnight. can we kind of like, forget this?” he asked rubbing the back of his neck and you softly laughed. 
“forget what?” you smiled and he returned it, giving a small kiss on the cheek before he left. he was a nice man, a good kid, and he meant no harm. he didn’t need a ruthless beating or yelling, just needed to tell him it wasn’t meant to be. you couldn’t shake the feeling of how wrong it was, how wrong it felt being tyler touching you. 
you knew who you wanted to touch you. as sweet and kind and charming tyler was, he wasn’t what you wanted. the man you wanted was across the hall from you, on the other side of the stairs. sleeping, maybe. 
you knew ellie was at a friends house doing only god knows what, so with the hope in mind that joel was asleep in his room, you trotted downstairs braless, and bottomless. you were still in the same tight shirt you left in, but now just in the pink panties that were apart of the gifts maria got you. just new/traded clothing you needed. the shirt hugged you and cut off at the dip of your curve, the fat of your tummy slightly protruding between the shirt and your panties. 
you didn’t look towards the fireplace where the sofas were, instead you grab a small cup and let faucet water pour into it, taking a drink. 
“work up a sweat?” a deep southern voice said behind you, from a distance. you jumped at the sudden break of silence and turned quickly to the sofas. 
“joel? what the fuck,” you breathed and stepped out to walk to the sofas. somehow, you completely disregarded the fact that all you had on was a shirt and panties, standing in joel miller’s living room. 
“what made you think it was a bright idea to invite a bastard in my home like that? not only that,” he said. you finally saw the light from outside shining on his face as he stood up, something glimmering in his hand. a gun. “but letting him touch all over you? that prick?” 
you had a lot to say, a lot to yell out. but the only thing to say was a snarky comment. “you know he called you the same thing.” 
which, he did. but you were too drunk on the flirting and drinks to care or to know why, even though you already knew. joel wasn’t nice to anyone but ellie. tommy and maria even think he’s an asshole, but that’s tommy’s brother and maria’s brother in law. he’s family. but there were things that you didn’t know about joel miller. things he didn’t want you to know either. 
“why do you even care? who’s touching me, i mean.” you scoff, feeling less embarrassed about your state of clothing. but being a lot more aware as he steps closer and closer to your curvy figure, putting his gun in the waistband of his sweatpants. 
he was intimidating like this. towering over you with his fists clenched, searching your face for something. you felt your heartbeat pick up as his eyes raked over you and fell on your lips. he was drunk off of you, the sight of your fat cunt only being clothed by a single piece of fabric drove him to dig his nails in his palms. the nakedness of your thighs, and the midriff showing—it was going to kill him.
“if you’re gonna fuck these town folk, make sure it ain’t in my house.” he spit, and you just rolled your eyes. you felt like you were in trouble for sneaking out, like a teenager. 
“i didn’t fuck anyone. we didn’t do anything. he wanted to, i didn’t.” you defended, feeling small now but still holding yourself tall.
joel just looked at you, not wondering if you were lying or not. he knew you weren’t, he heard it himself the minute he heard something bang against your wall. it was just you shuffling to get up, and he heard you consoling him. you weren’t satisfied. 
“why’d you lie to me? bout’ seein’ him tonight?” he asked, your head tilted up to his as he steps one step closer. your chest is almost touch his, and your breathing was getting heavier. 
“figured you wouldn’t trust him,” you said, sounding like you wanted to say something else but keeping it to yourself. 
he was watching you like you were his prey. like you were something he wanted to take and devour for himself, like you were something for his eyes only. 
“smart girl,” 
“he touch you wrong?” he couldn’t help but ask, the curiosity killing him slowly as time passes with you standing in front of him with your tight pink panties on. he looked down between the two of you and saw the hardened pebbles that were your nipples showing up through your black tight shirt, down to your tummy that was pressed against his. he liked the softness of your belly, he was practically dying to grip it himself. he wanted to grip every part of you, to palm your pussy and feel how warm you were in his grip. he even found himself hating his own mind as thought of what your pussy would look like sucking him in. 
“i, he,” you were stuttering, embarrassing yourself as his hand trailed up your arm, thinking of all the ways he could watch you take his cock for him. 
you watched him watch you. how his eyes went dark again, how there was a slight touch of possessiveness in his voice. you didn’t assume though.
“can’t find the words, hm? he wasn’t makin’ you feel good?” he asked softly, watching as you closed your eyes and breathed through your mouth, opening again to see a small grin playing on his lips, his head tilted to the side. his fingers barely left your wrist, and made their way to your fleshy hip, tapping against the bare skin. he was enjoying this. making you squirm. making you nervous. 
“fuck off, joel,” you meant it to come out a lot stronger than it did, even you thought you sounded needy. “s’ none of your damn business,” you spit, stronger this time.
and before you could even wallow in your retorts, a smile tugged very faintly at his lips. you weren’t so convincing when you were practically trying to pull him to your body with your fists buried in his sweater. he appreciated the effort though, he's never met someone with as much bite in their bark as you.
he just liked to watch you writhe for him. you wanted to whine with how eager you were for him, how mean he was being to you for no reason. you needed him.
“it’s like you’re not even tryin’, what’s the matter? do i make you nervous sweetheart?” he gleamed in his power over you, the way your eyes searched for him and your mouth parted, just for him. he wanted to ruin you in every way. ruin every man for you, show you how to truly be taken care of.
"go fuck yourself," you retorted and he actually laughed. and he laughed at you. a sudden heat rushed to your cheeks, embarrassment filling you.
“i didn’t tell you but,” he paused as he leaned into your ear, grazing his cheek against yours and smiling to himself, “you looked real pretty today, ya know that? you look even prettier like this, all flustered for me.” 
you had to be dreaming. had to have gone to sleep after tyler left, and this was your wet dream making up for it. there was no way you were this exposed to joel and he was practically pressed up against your body as he told you how pretty you looked. you couldn’t speak, your tongue was tied and joel smiled to himself as he realized he got you to shut up.
“would ya let me touch you, sweet girl? maybe you'd be nicer if someone knew how to touch you,” he asked, his fingers playing on your hip. 
you still couldn’t answer. it felt like a trap, like if you let yourself give in to his words, every guard you put up was pointless. you were frozen, and suddenly felt insanely vulnerable but his voice was so inviting, so impossible to not fall into.
“touch me where?” you asked, treading lightly. you wanted to hear it, you wanted him to tell you he wanted you as bad as you wanted him. you wanted to prove to yourself that you hadn't lost your mind yet. but you also wanted to stretch whatever this was as long as possible before you find yourself on your knees for him without even asking.
joel felt like he was out of his body. like he was watching you squirm and move under his presence from above. he was so distracted by how hard your nipples were rubbing against him that he didn’t even notice your fists balled into his shirt, trying to take him in closer. maybe it was the alcohol he drank to ignore the jealousy he felt, or maybe it was the fact that tommy came to tell joel about the boy you were seeing. how the two of you were practically on top of each other before he left, how he was touching you in public–he was angry. 
nothing was done, nothing more than joel grabbing your almost bare hip and you tugging on his shirt, but it still felt like something that was crossing a line. a line you wanted to cross.
until he got the courage to grab the hand that was buried in his sweater, taking it in his own and touching you with your hand. he was answering your question. his hand ghosted on top of yours as his eyes watched your eyes train on the sight between the two of the bodies, enjoying how soft and pink you look. you were hot and bothered, and he could get used to seeing you like this. 
“first place i’d touch you, baby,” he breathes, his lips practically against your cheek now. he was breathing you in, drinking you in, “is right here,” 
his hand guided you to cup your mound, angry that it wasn’t his hand touching you. your breath was shaky while you watched him, your eyes flickering from his moving hand to his eyes, and every time he made sure your eyes latched onto his. he wanted you to know how much he was enjoying teasing you like this, he wanted you to remember the way he looked at you while you panted against him. 
“but like this, lemme show you ‘xactly how i’d touch you sweetheart,” he was lost, drunken only on you, ignoring the world around him. “don’t think that boy would be enough for a woman like you, ain’t that right?"
he took his own hand as you were still pressed against his front, his lips now teasing the skin of the crook of your neck and starting to pull your panties away from your skin to dip his hand inside. your breathing was uneven and your soft whimpers were getting louder the more he trailed down into your underwear, and he was loving them.
the second he felt the scruff of your unshaved mound, he heard you release a shaky, sexy breath, and he grew harder against your bare abdomen. even feeling the heat of your skin on his clothed cock made him want to get on his knees and worship you.
"needy little fuckin' thing, that desperate for me huh? you gonna let me feel this pretty pussy how i want?"
he was so fucking filthy. so filthy for someone who hasn't even seen you naked, so filthy for someone who didn't even talk to you before this. it was agonizing, you were melting into his harsh words and wanted to listen to him make you feel small like this all night.
"joel, i swear," you warned as his breath hit your lips with his eyes on yours.
you had a bush, he thought to himself. he really didn’t think that would turn him on of course,  but now he pictured you standing in front of him, bottomless. how your belly would look with your curves, the way your breasts would rest at their natural position, your thighs fat and wide all for him, and the pretty fat mound waiting for him to feel and taste. worst time to think all of that of course, because it sent a flood of blood and excitement to his groin, giving him another thing to be nervous about. but god did he want to see it, see all of you laid in his bed, and tugging on the thatch of hair on your mound. he was fucked.
and god forbid you figured out that he’s been picturing you bent and folded in every way just so he could reach to the back of your cervix, if you figured out that his anger towards you is pent up sexual frustration because every time you’re in the shower, he’s thinking of the way you looked lathered in soap, waiting for him to join you. he was a sick man to think of you like this, but all of his desires and fantasies were threatening to barge in, to unleash all of his wants and needs to you. 
he was fighting himself to be a respectable man, a man who doesn’t think of women who were young enough to be his own kid in ways that were sinful. he shouldn’t be wanting to fill your throat with his cock when you smart mouth him. he was losing whoever he thought was himself, and letting heart and cock do his thinking. 
you couldn't think right, nothing was processing as you felt the heat of his hand on your cunt. you felt another wave of pleasure hit you and suddenly, you could feel your wetness pooling for him in your panties. you had a hard time wrapping your head around the fact that joel actually wanted you too, even if he wanted to put you in your place for once and shut you up.
you didn't care how he wanted you. you were a bitch, but you were desperate for him.
"mmm, you're real scary, baby, threats ain't gettin' you anywhere. you have t' beg me for my fingers," he teased, rubbing the hair on your mound.
"oh fuck off, i'm not begging you for shit," you're putting up a fight with yourself, and you were winning. at leadt you thought so. even if you were letting him touch you this way, you weren't goping to beg him or give him the pleasure of watching you submit to him.
"yeah? maybe i'll jus' make ya," he grinned, his sinister smile forming while he rested his forehead on yours, his hand inside your panties as the two of you watched him tease your lips.
the second joel’s finger moves from your hairy mound to the fat lips of your cunt to spread and feel just how much you ached for him, to tease your hole so you'd be sent into a fit of desperation, the two of you heard the doorknob jiggle and a loud laugh from the outside, meaning it was ellie. joel pulled his hand and body away quickly and nodded upstairs with a hard look, giving you the hint to go before ellie saw you in your panties. 
your face expressed everything to him, you needed him. and you didn’t want to let go. he watched as you walked up the stairs, your ass practically eating up the fabric of your panties. it left nothing to the imagination and he groaned, something you swore you heard, before he fixed himself in his pants. 
ellie walked in, and you stayed at the top of the stairs out of sight to hear the lecturing. 
“are you outta your damn mind, ellie? it’s three in the mornin’,” his paternal instincts were coming out, and you smiled. 
“i was down the street. relax, i just didn’t want to stay there.” ellie defended as she slipped her shoes off. 
“did somethin’ happen? are you hurt?” he asked quickly, examining ellie to see if he saw blood or cuts anywhere. 
“jeez, no joel lay off. why are you up anyways isn’t it like six hours past your bedtime?” she scoffed, annoyed at the father figure lecturing her right now. what was he gonna tell her? 
“was waitin for your friend to come home, so i can lock up before bed,” he lied. he was lying and you knew it. you came home an hour ago, and he was still up. 
“you’re in love aren’t ya? old man,” ellie teased. her demeanor was a little more playful than she’d been this last month and he shook his head annoyed, but to you it was silent. your lips pinched into a thin line as you heard joel grunt.
“go to be ellie. now.” he ordered and she rolled her eyes, saying her good nights and going to the garage to sleep in her space. 
a part of you wanted joel to come upstairs, into your room and to do everything he wanted to do. you didn’t know exactly what he wanted to do, but with the touching and flirting he was doing, it seemed like he wanted you. maybe he was drunk, you could smell it on his breath! he seemed pretty sober talking to ellie. you cursed yourself as you moved quietly to your room, leaving the door cracked open just in case. 
but nothing. you heard him trudge up the stairs, and walk directly the opposite direction into his own room. you were frustrated at this point. sexually frustrated if you must say, and the ache in your core was not leaving any time soon. 
you felt embarrassed, and you felt like joel was toying with you. all of the sudden this comes up and he's trying to finger fuck you in the living room when you genuinely thought he didn't even acknowledge your mere existence. it was so confusing for you, but the only thing you knew for sure now after a few weeks of deciding is that you craved joel miller.
it was a weird feeling. only because growing up in an apocalyptic world as a teenager and a young adult meant your chances of love and relationships were slim to none, at least for you. but you met joel in times where you had given up already.
as you lied in bed, wondering if joel was asleep or thinking about you too, you felt silly. you were setting yourself up for disaster by having hope that whatever this was with joel was more than that, and not just that. you worried you were getting ahead of yourself, maybe you were taking joel's advances too seriously. what if he just wants an easy fuck? nothing serious, something for pleasure in this dark world where everyone seeks a way to alleviate their pain
you felt like maybe you were geting into your head like you always do. maybe this could be good. maybe this could be your chance to let go, be vulnreable again, let someone make you feel like a teenager again. you had your fair share of crushes when you were in the QZ, you remembered that innocent feeling of liking someone, the shyness that came with it, how nervous you got around them. and with joel, you felt that times one hundred.
the flutters in your stomach, the goosebumps on your skin when he stands too close to you. he made you feel good even without trying.
but nothing good comes from joel miller.
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vctrvn-ls · 9 months
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How they’d react to you crying |Beta Squad|
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Scenario: Imagine they come home and see you crying for the first time bcs smth happened (idk what it doesn’t matter)
U know 3am thoughts as always
edit: not proof read , I accidentally posted it alr so doesn’t matter 💀
· ·──────────────· ·
Niko
Would first be shocked. His dialogue filled with oh no's and small gasps before he sits down beside you wraps his arms around you, asking what's wrong. Niko would be so patient. He'd wait for you to calm down, stop crying and get your thoughts together before explaining what was wrong. He wouldnt let go of you, he'd be holding onto you to you until you were stable enough to speak because seeing you cry would hurt him so much. After carefully listening to what you had to say, he'd instantly start coming up with things that would distract you. Food, movie night, shopping, nap, anything you'd want. And for the rest of the day he'd be so so worried for you, even if you had already calmed down completely, he'd still be so concerned because he cares so so much.
· ·──────────────· ·
AJ
AJ wouldn't freak out, I feel like he would handle the situation pretty well. He'd sit down beside you, ask you what's wrong and if you'd rather be left alone or you'd rather he stay. For AJ the most important thing is working out wether you wanted him beside you, hugging you, comforting you or if you'd prefer to be left alone with yourself until you calmed down.
As I said he wouldn't panic, he'd find the right way to calm you down and get you to explain everything to him. And after that he'd give you advice, help solve your issue or just be by your side for the rest of the night.
· ·──────────────· ·
Sharky
The sweetest person. He wouldn't hesitate to come rushing over to you, wiping your tears with his sleeve before kissing your forehead and pulling you into a tight hug. For him comfort comes first. He needs you to know that he's right there with you, that he cares and he's just as worried as you are. And after feeling his love and warmth, you'd quickly calm down and tell him everything. He'd thoroughly listen to all your words and then together you'd come up with a solution to your problem or if something tragic happened he'd express his sympathy with a few genuine lines.
For the rest of the day he'd be extra affectionate (if that's even possible). He wouldnt go over the top though, he already knows what you like and what you don't, so that's wouldn't be a challenge (?)
· ·──────────────· ·
Kenny
Poor Kenny would be so shocked to see you cry he'd even put his hand over his mouth and gasp. There would be a looot of oh my gosh's, we know Kenny. He'd pull you into a hug, making you crumble even more. He would be clueless on what to say or how to act, so he'd just sit there, stroke your back and keep repeating "It's okay" over and over. You’d feel so so safe in his embrace and so comforted by his soft tone and genuine concern that in no time you’d end up telling him everything and of course get maximum support from him after you do.
· ·──────────────· ·
Chunkz
Now I think Chunkz would be the calmest. He’d act composed, and he would want you to get all your emotions out. “It’s ok to cry” , “it’s alright let it all out” he’d say as he holds you close to his chest. And after some time and some more soothing words, he’d get up and make you a cup of tea (or your favorite warm drink) and the two of you would sit at a table and talk about what happened. He’d definitely give the best advice, or words of encouragement, (depending on what you need) and afterwards you’d fill a shit ton better and very grateful. Chunky we love you!!!
· ·──────────────· ·
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chocotonez · 1 year
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skz with a sick s/o
a/n: I hate the color blue too much I’m not sure how long I can keep this theme </3 idk how it’s possible to hate the color blue but I hate it and if I look up blue aesthetic banner one more time on pinterest I’m gonna lose my mind
genre/warnings: sickness, jokes about death, kinda crack but mainly fluff, swearing, throwing up, implied fever?? please let me know if there’s something that needs to be tagged w a warning!
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chan
-he’s got ur back bb dw
-takes your temperature, tucks you into bed, pushes your hair out of your face and puts a cool/warm towel over your head/neck, gets the comfiest pillows for you and braves ur feverish body temperature to give you a kiss
-rubs ur back while you throw up
-calls you the prettiest in the world while you’re literally sweating your ass off
-feeds you soup and is so loving the entire time he helps you recover, he even takes days off work just in case
-post sickness he’ll be constantly monitoring your temperature n sneaking tissues into your pocket!! he doesn’t want u to feel so miserable again :)
-sings you to sleep if your sickness is keeping you up, he’s there for you and it makes him a bit sad to see u so under the weather which motivates him even more into helping you feel better!!
lee know
-“LMAOO you got sick” is what he probably sent you after u sent a photo of your temperature, but he was immediately rushing to your place with soup, cold towels, heated plushies, weighted blankets, a humidifier, a bladeless fan, a defibrillator…
-is silently panicking and sobbing to see you in pain and coughing, but somehow still teases you
-“are you dying” every five minutes, half joking but honestly he is STRESSED
-throws medicine at you until you get better, he wants you to feel better so you can cuddle and kiss and so he can drink from ur water bottle
-cooks you comfort meals, texts your mom/parental figure about what meals you liked as a kid, writes a will where you leave behind everything to him, etc…Just boyfie things!!
-doesn’t let you fall behind in work/school, marks missed projects on your calendar and randomly comes into your room to organize your desk every hour. one) because he’s restless and can’t kiss you or cuddle, and two) his asian mom instincts are just kicking in
-at the end of the day, you can always rely on him :,)
changbin
-cries when you tell him you’re sick
-doesn’t really care and cuddles you while stroking your head, sobbing “my pooor baaaaby”
-tucks you in which a bunch of blankets if you say it’s cold, turns the temperature down to literally freezing if you say it’s hot, he just wants u to be COMFORTABLE!! then he realized temperature extremes can get you more sick so he steals lee know’s bladeless fan teehee
-gets you every single medicine flavor because he has no idea what you like and he insists you stay off your phone and limit your screen time while you’re resting
-if you don’t want him to get sick, he’ll probably lay on the floor next to you and just talk to you. he doesn’t want you to feel lonely especially when you feel so bad, he knows getting sick can be boring
-asks how you’re feeling every few minutes, admires you while you sleep, risks a little kiss on your forehead
-so so so excited the second you start feeling better! immediately wants to go out and do everything he’s been waiting for but…
-he got sick :,(
hyunjin
-probably the calmest one out of all of them, but he’s very worried about your well being
-he indulges in entertaining you though, fake crying and wasting your tissues while delivering a eulogy, checking your temperature and pretending to faint, etc -wants you to feel good and cared for, he hates being icky so he massages your hands and makes sure you don't get too sweaty, does face masks, washes your hair for you
-he wants you to feel the best you can even when you're literally miserable
-he lets you rest ofc ofc, but he prefers you to lay with him on the couch so he can constantly monitor you and also so he can watch tv
-takes selfies while you're fighting for ur life in the background ("its for the memories!! you look fine babe!!) -so so so soft and gentle with you, feather-light kisses on your forehead, ghosting his hands over your sides while tucking you in, he is a dream to have around when you're sick (unless you throw up because thats icky and he'll just be morale support) han
-i feel like he wouldn't really know what to do LMAO
-probably distances himself from the situation because he doesn't wanna stress you out or disrupt your rest, but he'll text u every five seconds asking if you need anything or you want something from the store
-can't take it and bursts into your apartment all dramatically with a dozen grocery bags stock-piled of things to make you feel better, he's here to save the day! -teases you a ton but that's just because he wants to see you laugh -says he's gonna go make soup but just heats up some his mom made -kisses and cuddles 4 u! he'd probably also get sick because he can't get enough of you and he just has to be around you n holding you -"do u want water? do you want another blanket? do u want any snacks? do you want to go watch TV? do you want more soup? do u need medicine?" -you'll probably wake up in the middle of the night to him at the edge of the bed, working on his laptop, and he'll look over and smile and he'll be like "ah!! bb don't get up it's late, do you need something??" -SOBBING. i have to move on because now i'm sad he's too cute -snuggles into bed with you, adjusting your pillows and brushing your hair out of your face, before kissing your cheek and whispering "get better soon" felix
-felix.exe is currently responding to the problem, this will just be a second... -he knows that as ur boyfriend this is a responsibility he should have known would happen, but he can't help but look up "how to take care of loved ones when they're sick" -brings your favorite hoodie of his, snacks, board games and card games, medicine, pillows covered in his cologne, and the best tasting medicine cuz he knows how icky it is :( -a surprisingly good nurse, always asking if you're comfortable and okay, "do you want me to turn on the TV? is the temperature okay?" -he mainly wants to prioritize you resting and eating well, and he constantly refills a chilled water bottle for you -insists you drink water or he'll probably cry -tries not to be a cuddle bug because you might be feverish, but he flops on top of you and hugs you, nuzzling his cheek into your shoulder while you chide him because he could get sick -i feel like he has a weirdly strong immune system and he just,,,doesn't get sick -makes sure you fall asleep at a reasonable time but then spends the next hour monitoring your temperature and making sure ur comfortable </3 seungmin
-very languid approach, he realizes that you probably just want to rest and feel better, so he won't be as...I guess comforting? In the traditional sense?? -obviously he'll do his duty as your boyfriend, make sure you take your medicine, drink water, get proper amounts of rest...But he'll spend most of the day curled up with you and showing you stupid tik toks -it's a break day for him, and a rest day for you -probably finds weird folk myths that'll supposedly cure you, so he tries them out just so you don't feel like you're stuck in bed all day -giggles while rubbing mint lip balm on your stomach because "that's pretty much what they did in medieval days!!" -takes the best naps with you, he doesn't want you to be sick but he's so glad he has a day with you like this, as selfish as it is tbh -if you get up to get a drink of water, he'll groggily get up from the bed and gently drag you back to bed by the waist -"rest is the best medicine lovely, c'mon" -probably takes really ugly photos of you to laugh at, back camera flash photos or silly snapchat filters, he loves your smile -I think at some point he'll get bored though and go out shopping so he can stretch and get u any wants or needs lolol jeongin
-a bit of a little shit about it but he's very cute -"oh this medicine smells like shit," before offering a spoonful to you with a pitying smile -rolls you up in blankets and holds you like you're a little cocoon plush -every time you try to eat something, he googles if it's healthy for you LMAO -"jagi don't touch that tangerine, I gotta check if it's certified for the ill" -makes you hot cocoa and buys comfort meals so you feel...comfortable lolol -i really don't believe he'd see it as such a big deal, he understands if you don't want to be doted on and he'll take care of you, but he just is very chill and casual -you're just sick, and he wants you to feel better but he realizes that it's natural to be uncomfortable and u just gotta get through it!! -shows u rlly dumb motivational gifs he found on an auntie's facebook teehee, finds some oddly inspiring though -if you complain about sweating he'll be like "is it too hot?? that's kinda expected with a fever" and then you throw a pillow while he runs to turn down the temperature -sleeps over so you don't feel lonely, puts on baby sensory videos for you so "little baby can rest!!" while squishing your cheeks -such a loser (endearing)
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spriingwater · 6 months
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i can’t even express my feelings throughout this relationship because every time i have i’ve been invalidated, i am so unhappy yet i am so in love, it’s the most confusing feeling, crying myself to sleep almost every night for over a year, my heart starts racing and i feel a lump in my throat whenever he is having a bad day bc i know it won’t end good, worrying about our future bc he hasn’t healed, he’s only suppressed, making me feel unloved and disgusted with my body for months after he raped me twice, the first time i knew as it was happening it was rape bc i was tearing up as he was in me, literally frozen in place and not saying a single word or noise, second time took me a while to realise that just because he ‘didn’t know’ or ‘didn’t mean it’ doesn’t make it any different, it’s still rape, and especially since he promised after the first time it won’t happen again, broke his own promise again, then told his friends that we aren’t having enough sex but didn’t even think to tell them it’s because u raped me twice and i can’t bare to think about sex, the months that followed weren’t romantic, it wasn’t real sex, it was me just giving in to ur horny needs and pleasuring you because you complained that it’s been days since sex, u didn’t even take into account that you raped me twice and that takes people YEARS to get over, i had to force myself to suppress what happened to continue to please you, everything I do is to please you, I drain myself, tire myself out, overwork myself at home, cook for you, have sec with you after two rapes, book your medical appointments, help with your needs, do as you say, do most things you need without you even asking, everything I do is to please you, I’m living my life for you, I’m not even living my own life
and the reason I’ll NEVER tell you this is because I’ve tried and you dismissed it, I tried again and u tried to argue with me telling me I’m wrong and u didn’t mean to, and that I’m not telling the truth, I can’t bring up any issues with you because you get defensive, that’s a huge huge HUGE toxic red flag, it’s possibly the worst one out there, it’s worse than ten medium red flags, it’s a HUGE red flag, there’s so much you are doing wrong that make me severely uncomfortable and feel unloved and used weekly but you won’t ever see it bc ur inner child is hurt and u haven’t done therapy so to u everyone is wrong and u are right, I want to be able to talk to you but I can’t because everything is an argument with you, I’m mentally drained and there have been plenty of times where taking my own life seemed like the calmest option, u pushed me that way whether u meant it or not, which u obviously didn’t mean but u have to understand what u mean might not come across that way to everyone else, I’m telling u to get therapy to help you, not to control you, everything I’ve done is to help you, so we can be healthy together and thrive, but as I said until u go through therapy ur mind is stuck at the age u went through trauma, so ur brain hasn’t developed, and that’s why I stay, because I have hope you can be healed and helped, and u will get the help you deserve and the broken child in u deserves, i await that day, please please please, I love you
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happyheidi · 3 years
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“When the moon came down” by Feridun Oral
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outivv · 3 years
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AAAAA NOW DO A PART 2 WITH OTHER CHARACTERS TO CUTTING YOUR HAIR PLS I LOVE IT SM AND THANK U SM T^T ♡
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Synopsis: part two to characters reacting to you cutting your hair due to insecurity
Warnings: mentions of sadness and insecurity
Game/ fandom: genshin impact
Characters: albedo, childe, and zhongli
Pronouns for reader: gender neutral/ not mentioned
A/n: hello again! As I’m writing this authors note it’s past midnight, so... I’m going to write this authors note then go to sleep, I apologize for the wait but I’m really tired :’> so I hope you can understand. I know I’ll have fun writing this though, I know I did only three characters but I’m still really excited! I should probably go to sleep now, but sorry again for the wait, and I hope you enjoy! Also I almost forgot to say, take care of yourself! Get some water, or food, or take a nap/ go to sleep!
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— Albedo —
Albedo came home from dragonspine feeling exhausted, and truly just wanting to fall asleep in your arms. So with that said, I don’t think he’d notice right away. Like it’d take him a second, and that’s only cause he’s tired, on normal circumstances he’d notice right away.
Either way though, he’ll stare at you for a moment before saying, “your hair... I like it” he’ll have his typical monotone voice, but have a soft smile painted on his face.
He’ll also probably cup your face in his hands, and just stare at you. Albedo really likes to admire you, and now you cut your hair! So he’s going to admire you even more! He says small things that are really sweet for a while, he says things like, “would you mind if I draw you? I think that what you did with your hair looks really nice, and would love to draw it.” God I love him
When you tell him you cut your hair because you were insecure/ sad, he’d be empathetic towards you, and probably say even more sweet nothings to you. He genuinely really likes your hair now and he wants you to know that! :)
— childe —
I think when he sees what you’ve done with your hair it can go one of two ways. One, he just tackles you, or embraces you in some way, showering you with kisses, and praise. Or two, he stares at you trying to act calm but later he’s going to complement you and smother you with love. And I only say that because it depends on where you both are when he finds out. If he’s near other people he’s not going to tackle you in the streets of liyue!
He won’t shut up. He’ll be saying praises left and right. And you may be thinking that he’s hyperactive while doing all of this, but no. He’s just become super soft for you for a while, because you look so good with short hair!
He probably plays with your hair a lot. Like he knows it’s not that big of a deal, and that it’s just hair, but he loves how you look! So he won’t stop saying how much he loves how you look!
When he finds out you cut your hair because you were sad/ insecure though, he’s going to feel kinda bad :(. He’s going to be reassuring and basically preach praises on how amazing you looked before, and after! Because you look amazing either way to him! :D
— zhongli —
When zhongli walked into your shared home he noticed right away what you did. He’s got to admit he liked your long hair before, but short hair looks really nice on you! He’ll walk over to you, kiss your forehead, and say, “I like what you did with your hair love” it’s simple, it’s straight to the point. He does like what you did with your hair, so he’s going to say that!
He’s probably the calmest of the bunch when he sees what you did, or at least that’s how he appears. He appears to be calm, but he’s going to complement you all the time. Just sweet little things that he’ll say while kissing your cheek, or forehead.
He probably plays with your hair a decent amount, and he’ll probably style it if you want. He’s not too skilled with styling hair, but he’ll try if you want him too!
When you say you cut your hair because you were insecure/ sad he’ll probably be very understanding, and reassuring. Like he gets it, he gets insecure at times too, so he knows what it’s like. He’ll be very sweet, and very gentle too, he just wants you to know how pretty/handsome/gorgeous he thinks you are!
— xiao —
Xiao is a mix of “it’s just hair. I don’t really care.” And “oh wow... they look... they look really pretty. Maybe I should... maybe I should give them more love and attention than I already do...?” And it’s an internal struggle.
He almost begrudgingly comments on your hair, he doesn’t mean any harm, but he’s kinda unsure how to react. Cause xiao will notice what you did with your hair right away, but again he’s a strange mix of two different reactions. So he’ll say something like, “you changed your hair. It’s... nice” while you can see the tips of his ears turning red.
He’s already clingy as is, so not much changes, but he’ll play with your hair a bit more. He really likes playing with your hair now, he doesn’t know why he likes it more now but he does.
He also complements you a bit more than usual. He’s very very sweet but doesn’t know how to respond very well, so he does what first comes to mind. And that’s playing with your hair and complementing you!
When he finds out you cut your hair because you were insecure/ sad he kinda thinks something along the lines of ‘I knew there was a catch’ because neither of you can just be happy, there gotta be something that steps in the way and brings everything down. He’ll be comforting to you, but will still have that begrudging feeling that everything has to have a catch and go slightly wrong. He just wants you to be happy :(
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arcanestage · 3 years
Note
HII GEN!! May I request for these prompts for Zora
6. “I always thought it was so cute, how you do that.”
12. “Everyone was secretly waiting for us to get together, weren’t they?”
HI ANONY THANK YOU FOR REQUESTING! this is my first time writing for zora ahhh he deserves more love <3 im so sorry this took awhile 😭 anyway i hope u like it 💓
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Pairing: Zora x fem!reader
Prompts: “I always thought it was so cute, how you do that.” + “Everyone was secretly waiting for us to get together, weren’t they?”
Warnings: cursing
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You never thought you’d ever become a magic knight. You lived a fairly quiet life in the commoner realm, operating a small family business. One morning though he saw you stand up for a helpless child being attacked by noble children. Yami approached you and tossed you a Black Bulls robe, telling you that he wanted you in his squad.
And so begins your journey as a member of the “worst” squad in Clover Kingdom.
You were quiet and the calmest out of all the members. You were rational and kept the members from creating so much chaos which is why Yami assigned you to watch the hideout to ensure nobody makes any serious damages.
When Zora joined the squad, he brought in more chaos making the hideout livelier than ever. You didn’t mind; you enjoyed seeing your squadmates mess up the whole hideout while you read a book in the corner of the common room.
Magna and Zora were showing off their new spells, trying to outdo the other. Zora went a bit overboard, unleashing a trap spell directly at you. You deflected it, not even bothering to look up from the book you’re reading.
“Do you guys mind toning it down a little bit?” glancing at them
Zora chuckled. “It’s Magna’s fault for not deflecting it. I was aiming at you, shithead!”
“WHAT?! It’s not my fault you have shitty aiming skills!”
So now they’re having a petty argument on who’s the worst mage in the kingdom between the both of them.
You laughed then shook your head, shifting your attention back at the novel you were reading.
Zora aimed at you on purpose though. He wanted to see how you, the quiet, introverted girl would react. He did get a reaction and boy did it make his heart skip a beat.
Every so often, Zora would subtly bother you. The first few times he would flick a stinkbug at you, watching you sniff around then scrunch up your face in disgust.
“What are in those Zora? It smells awful!” you said in between coughs.
“Asta’s fart,”
“EH?! BUT MY FART DOESN’T SMELL BAD!”
You laughed then shook your head.
And again, Zora’s heart skipped a beat.
The next few days, Zora would casually sit near you in the common room, randomly telling you lame jokes or “insulting” the other members like he usually does.
To his delight, you laughed at all that he did. It got to a point where you would put the down the book you’re currently reading whenever he tries to strike up a conversation with you.
It became an everyday occurrence: he would sit next to you while you were reading and engage you in a random conversation. Talks with Zora were always pleasant so you didn’t really mind being bothered.
The other members were giving you side glances, starting to get an idea on whatever it was that was blooming between the two of you.
“Zora and Y/N look cute together!” Vanessa squealed, watching you both while she was sprawled on the couch.
“What?! I’d bet on anybody else to be with Y/N except for that masked jerk!” Magna exclaimed
“Oh it’s on, virgin delinquent!”
“STOP CALLING ME THAT!”
One sunny afternoon, you decided to sit under a tree to read your newly bought book. You were so engrossed with the story you didn’t see nor feel Zora walk up to you.
“Oi are you trying to get yourself fried out here?”
You snapped your head towards the voice. You smiled when you saw that it was just Zora.
“I love feeling the warmth of the sun when the weather is good like this. It puts me in a reading mood,” you pat the empty area beside you, inviting him to sit to which he did.
“You know, I still find it hard to understand how you got scouted by the Psycho Captain. Are you sure you weren’t held at gunpoint?” Zora said, leaning comfortably on the tree behind him.
“People keep saying that! Am I not Black Bulls material enough?”
He chuckled. “Yeah, everybody’s a dumbass, violent, has issues, or a weirdo one way or another.”
“Don’t I fit in any of the categories?” you giggled.
“All you do is read and keep the squad in check,” he scratched his head, thinking hard. “Maybe in the weirdo category I mean how the fuck can you read in such a rowdy environment with Asta yelling everywhere and Luck randomly zapping people?!”
You hummed in response then it was silent for a while. You and Zora basked in each other’s presence while listening to the rustling of the leaves. The peace was disrupted when you laughed out of nowhere.
“What is it? I think you really are a weirdo.”
“No, no I just...” you stopped yourself from laughing any further. “I always thought it was so cute, how you do that.” you smiled
He stared at you wide eyed. If he was blushing, you couldn’t see beneath the mask.
“Do what?”
“That thing where you manage to find me every time I’m reading, wherever I may be.” you gave him a warm smile. “I noticed just now.” you laughed again.
It was true; Zora would always search for you at a particular time of the day and find you indulged in yet another book. Wherever he found you he would shamelessly walk up to you and keep you company just like now.
He chuckled. “Must be a coincidence,”
“Yeah like that one time you found me reading on the roof. Sure. A coincidence.” you teased.
He gave a hearty laugh. “You’re too smart to be in this squad.”
You hummed and slowly creeped your hand to touch his. He intertwined his fingers between yours then stood up, trying to pull you up with him.
“As much as I like being around you, I’m getting toasted in this heat. Let’s go inside,” he said
You hopped on your feet and placed a kiss on his cheek. “You must like me a lot to endure being under the sun for more than 10 minutes huh?”
He smirked. “Alright smart ass, that’s enough talking for you.”
You walked inside the hideout, hands intertwined and teasing each other.
When the members saw, they fell silent, staring at the two of you, mouths slightly agape.
“Oi what’s with weird look on your faces?” Zora said.
Vanessa and the other members stood up and screamed in sheer happiness.
“See?! I knew it! I won, virgin delinquent, now pay up!” Vanessa yelled.
Magna was dramatically wailing on the side. “How can you embarrass me like this Y/N? HOW?!”
“What does that supposed to mean?!” Zora exclaimed.
While everyone was busy ganging up on Magna, you and Zora just laughed at the scene in front of you.
He gave you a nudge. “Everyone was secretly waiting for us to get together, weren’t they?”
“Except Magna, apparently.” you laughed.
“Well, he’s just gonna have to get used to us.” he said as he wrapped an arm around your shoulder. “Maybe we should kiss in front of him to piss him off.”
You tiptoed and placed a chaste kiss on his lips. Your lips lingered for a while just enough time for Magna to see.
Magna retched. “You two are disgusting, get a room!”
You and Zora laughed while padding towards your room for more privacy to talk? To plan pranks on Magna? To makeout? Who knows!
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idontblushsrry · 3 years
Text
Hikaru Hitachiin||SFW Alphabet
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A/N: Will this include Hikaru slander? Yes. Hikaru stans come get ur food, enjoy!
Word Count: 2219
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A: Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)
Hikaru shows affection physically. He’s much too prideful to admit (bar the rare and private confessions of adoration and love) his love for you through words or actions and he prefers to receive instead of give gifts. But a little arm around your shoulder, holding your hand in his pocket, small pecks on the cheek and you more than know how much Hikaru loves you.
B: Best Friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)
Hikaru likely becomes best friends with you via pranks. He takes note of you when you catch him trying to mess with Tamaki and give him a few pointers on how to better scare the poor blonde. From there, it’s history.
C: Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)
Hikaru loves to cuddle. He becomes especially clingy at night at which point all he wants to do is hold you. When he’s away from you, he still prefers to cuddle with something so he’ll substitute you for a pillow. Not the same but it gets the job done until he can return home to you and get wrapped up in your arms again.
D: Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)
Hikaru likes the idea of settling down. He’d definitely want to head to the countryside or somewhere mountainous that’s surrounded by beaches. He likes the thought of you and him being together in your own little pocket of the world. As for cooking and cleaning, he can’t do either and has no interest in doing so, so he’d probably pay a few servants to do the work for him.
E: Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)
If Hikaru had to break up with you, it’d likely be the result of both of you needing to part ways so that you can work on yourselves before trying to give the relationship another shot. Hikaru generally acts unaffected (and depending on the length of your relationship, he is) but deep down he resolves to become better for you.
F: Fiance(e) (How would they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)
He doesn’t really like the idea of marriage because he views it as an expensive mess that ends in an even more expensive divorce. He does like the idea of spending his life with you but if yall ever got married he might just get a pre-nup. Overall though, he’s not really the sort for marriage, the legal part of it especially gives him anxiety, and to be honest, when he knows that he’s committed to you, it just is. Loving and being with you becomes as natural as breathing for him.
G: Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)
Hikaru isn’t really gentle at all. Like he definitely tries to be soft and tender with you but also he likes to pinch your butt when you walk past, and really is he so terrible for that? (Kind of, that shit be hurtin mf)
H: Hugs( Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)
Please hug Hikaru, he won’t ask for it or initiate aside from throwing his arm around your waist/shoulder. He craves your hugs and whenever you hug him it’s like the clouds part and a rainbow shines down onto your relationship. Hikaru’s hugs, as a result of his refusal to just ask for a hug, are always a little clingy, desperate to hold you tight to him for as long as possible.
I: I love you (How fast do they say the L-word)
One of Hikaru’s biggest regrets is how fast he said ‘I love you’. It was spur of the moment and he didn’t mean it, he just thought he had to say it because you’d both been dating for 3 months and he just straight up didn’t mean it. The look on your face was filled with so much joy that he feels disgusted with himself whenever he thinks back to it. Now every time he says he loves you, he tries his hardest to make sure that you understand just how much he means it. He never wants you to doubt the depth of his devotion for you.
J: Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous)
He and Kaoru are already getting that gleam in their eye. In all seriousness though, he gets really pouty and everything becomes a competition between him and the person he’s jealous of. It’s like, “Oh, you’re on track to become an olympic class track runner? That’s cool I guess, what’s really impressive is the fact that I’m 5′9″. It’s embarrassing for both of you, and you just apologize for him before walking away, dragging him along with you.
K: Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)
Hikaru’s kisses are a lot like him in the sense that they’re exciting with a hint of trouble. Hikaru enjoys flustering you by kissing you in as many public places as passionately as possible before walking off and acting like everything’s all normal. He likes to smirk into kisses and his kisses are so intense that most times they turn into makeout sessions despite neither of you really planning it.
L: Little ones (How are they around children)
Hikaru is kid of awkward around kids. He doesn’t really care too much for them and so whenever they’re around, he tends to just hand them off to the nearest person who cares for children. He genuinely doesn’t know what to do so if he’s left alone with a kid he’ll just kinda stare and ask if they need food or something.
M: Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)
Mornings with Hikaru are sweet but stressful. Hikaru has an alarm that plays music and sends confetti instead of a more traditional one, and while Hikaru’s used to the sound of his alarm clock, you aren’t, and sleep right through it. Does Hikaru think ‘oh maybe I should wake Y/N up?’ Nope. He just sits there and stares at you until you naturally wake up on your own. You wake up so peacefully and stare at him until you get a glimpse at the time and start panicking and yelling at him for not waking you up sooner. 
N: Night (How are nights spent with them?)
Nights with Hikaru are the calmest you’ll ever see him. He’s very sleepy and gets 1000% clingier. Whether it’s wrapping his arms and legs around you as he sleeps or you letting him sit on your lap while he applies both your and his face mask, nighttime Hikaru is just a clingy sweetheart trying to make up for a day of him acting like he’s not fully in love with you.
O: Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)
Hikaru is a very layered person. Just when you think you’ve discovered something about him, you actually just barely scratched the surface. He tries to be more and more open with you, hiding less from you. But it’s not exactly easy to break his habit of not/fear of being open.
P: Patience (How easily angered are they?)
Hikaru is a little brat, which means if he doesn’t get his way he will resort to mischief and then angry pouting. He gets angry kind of easily but he’s just gotten good at hiding it. Over the course of his relationship with you, he does start to chill out a bit, not getting his way doesn’t bother him as much anymore.
Q: Quizzes (How much would they remember about you?  Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)
Hikaru remembers weird bits of information about you at the strangest and most inopportune moments. Like you’ll be talking to Kyoya while Hikaru is talking with his clients and he’ll just suddenly remember mid-act that you were like school council president at your elementary school or something and completely freeze and break character. 
R: Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)
His favorite moment in your relationship (although this was technically before the two of you were together) was after the host club’s ball, you walked up to him like “I know the party’s over but may I have this dance.” He accepted of course and you both danced the night away. Just thinking about that day sends butterflies running through his stomach and he swoons for you all over again.
S: Security (How protective are they? How would they like to be protected?)
Hikaru is super protective over you. If he’s out and about with you somewhere and he feels like you’re in danger (not too common but always a risk with him being rich), he’s activating emergency defense protocol procedures. He’s also kinda dramatic about it like if you bump into the edge of the coffee table he’ll laugh at you but then while you aren’t looking, he’s calling to have the whole table removed. Have mercy on whoever decides to bother you though because he and Kaoru are not above jumping.
T: Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)
Hikaru puts a lot of effort into your dates, he enjoys the challenge of trying to one up his last attempt as well as trying to surprise you each time. He’s not really the type to give gifts unless they’re in the form of clothes, but he’d much rather get gifts than give them. He does get a little upset if he starts feeling like he’s the only one trying so shake things up by surprising him instead (wipe that all-knowing grin off his face). Despite the fact that he’ll try to act like he doesn’t try that hard, he really does want to impress you and he tries his hardest to do so.
U: Ugly (What are some bad habits of theirs? (I’m gonna add arguments here because they aren’t on the prompt list I found))
A bad habit of Hikaru’s is that he has a tendency to try and pick fights. No matter where this stems from, he tends to try and bait you into fights or disagreements. He doesn’t even realize that he does this until you point it out to him. (Well honestly you pointed it out, then in disbelief he went and asked the host club at which point, they agreed, and he was left in shock at their lack of hesitation).
V: Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)
Hikaru, like Tamaki, is obsessed with his looks. He often lies and says that it’s Kaoru who’s obsessed with looks, but Hikaru goes absolutely feral if someone so much as touches any of his beauty products. He honestly doesn’t even want you to touch them unless you’re coming back from buying his stuff at the store.
W: Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)
At first, Hikaru kinda treats your relationship with him like an exchange. He’s terrified you’re only interested in him for his looks or his money and so he does everything possible to make you stay because he was scared of what it would be like to be a person without you. He does break out of that dependent mindset eventually though. To be completely honest, you both probably break up because of Hikaru’s dependent tendencies and only get back together once both of you grew without the other for a while.
X: (E)xes (Any previous relationship experience. How does that factor into your current relationship?)
 Hikaru has absolutely no relationship experience as he’s spent the last however may years of his life fending off all potential interaction with people who weren’t Kaoru with a stick.
Y: Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner)
Hikaru’s only real turn-offs are people with no sense of style. Of course, it’s not a huge deal breaker but you pretty much have to be ok with being Hikaru’s personal doll. He also really dislikes boring people, like if your life can be summed up in a resume, he’s skipping past you. Another thing that he looks for in his partner is, obviously, the ability to tell the difference between him and his twin. If you can’t do that, he’s already written you off completely.
Z: Zzz (What is a sleep habit of theirs?)
Hikaru sleeps fully and completely in the nude, like no boxers or anything. Initially, it was kind of a joke/ look at me thing but now he can’t help himself. Now, it’s fine between the two of you now, but the first time you spent the night at Hikaru’s house, only to find he’d somehow stripped all the way down in his sleep come morning, was...surprising to say the least. (You couldn’t look him in the eye for almost a month afterwards)
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neon-junkie · 3 years
Note
you've mentioned before that you smoke *wink wink*, so could we get some hc's on what its like to smoke with some of the gang? nsfw or sfw?
i got u homie ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) gender-neutral reader, mostly sfw. headcanons include: John, Javier, Bill, Micah, Sean, Kieran, and Dutch.
everything is under the cut because of the obvious drug-use warning lol
---
John
John is the kinda person who claims he smokes when in reality, he had one puff at a party, panicked, then stopped smoking and convinced himself he was high all night.
Buys weed socks even though he's barely ever smoked; plays into the stoner trope a lot too. He doesn't know how to 'act' when he's high so he just follows the stereotypes.
If you ask him to smoke with you, he'll be like "Yeah, I know what I'm doing, I'll even roll for you," and then produces the worst joint you've ever seen.
BUT it's smokeable so who are you to judge?
Will probably big himself up, smoke far too much, then pretend like he's alright. Even if you question him on if he's actually alright, he'll just keep denying it and be like "yeah I'm cool."
Has the reaction times of a snail. You'll mention something to him and 10 minutes later he'll carry on the conversation.
John.exe has stopped working.
Will get munchies galore and probably starts asking you about aliens and all that generic shit.
He loves a cuddle, mostly because you won't be able to see his ghost-white face and mock him for being irresponsible with drugs.
If he's not in too-much of a state then he may try and come onto you, which usually means rutting his cock against your ass whilst he spoons you, and then cumming in his pants before he can actually do anything with you...
Javier
Knows how to roll and always offers how to roll; He sometimes gets carried away and tries making cross blunts and all those pretty, smokeable things.
Very laid back, encourages you to smoke whatever amount you're comfortable with, and he'll do the same.
He'll seem completely normal until you ask him to do something basic like play his guitar, and then you'll realise how fried his brain is.
No, he can't play his guitar whilst high... He'll probably pick it up and get ready to play but he can barely strum a note, his brain just shuts down and he'll sit there, zoned out, until you call his name.
He's really hooked on theories about the chupacabra so you'll hear him talk about that myth a lot, along with a handful of other theories and conspiracies.
On the odd occasion that Javier is stable enough to cook, he'll make the best stoner meals out there, mixing things that probably shouldn't work together but do simply because he cooked it.
Gets a bit touchy-feely, like he'll want to play with your hair or the buttons on your shirt, or just have you cuddle up to him whilst you both vibe together.
Don't be surprised if he kisses your temple or cheek often whilst gushing about how much you truly mean to him.
He's really down to fuck if you are.
Bill
Cuddle bug :)
It doesn't matter if you're dating or not, Bill will end up snuggling you and oh god, he's the best cuddler you'll ever meet.
He's quite laid back when he smokes, but when he first started he'd get impatient on the short amount of time it takes to kick in, so he'd smoke even more and end up in a weed coma.
He doesn't want to do anything, just cuddle you and share some snacks, and he'll even feed you without asking.
If you're after someone snuggly and lazy to smoke with then Bill is your guy; all you'll do is cuddle, eat, and sleep.
He'll chat with you a bit but nothing too deep. Bill just wants to relax and vibe, no brain power needed.
You are going to have the BEST weed nap with him too, you'll feel like a whole new person once you wake up.
And you may feel something pressed against your bum as Bill spoons you. He'll be more than happy if you help wake him up.
Micah
Oh my god, he boasts that he can smoke ten blunts at once, but he'll get stupidly high off the smallest toke ever.
*has one drag* *voms*
On the rare occasion that Micah manages to get high without dying, he's just a horny bastard. Drugs as a whole have that effect on Micah, he always gets stupidly horny under the influence.
BUT if you choose to sleep with him, he'll start with trying to be kinky, and halfway through he'll just kinda forget that he's meant to be kinky and ends up making love to you instead. So, if you're already dating then this could be quite a tender moment.
So much pillow talk afterwards; he loves to get really cosy, urging you to snuggle up to him, nattering away at whatever you want to talk about.
He's alright at rolling so he'll roll another joint and share it with you in bed.
Will probably fall asleep on you whilst you're chatting away, and you'll wake up the next day to find Micah snuggled up to you. He wants to be cuddled but just doesn't have the confidence to tell you, so his body will make it happen instead.
Sean
You know those videos you see of high people doing really stupid shit when they're high? Yeah, that's Sean.
He looks high as well, gets really bad redeye, and gets gigglier than usual.
Very touchy-feely, in either a romantic or platonic way.
He wants to be cuddled, you need to be the big spoon and he'll sob if you aren't. But on the rare occasion, he'll just want you to snuggle up to him by the campfire, your head resting in the curve of his neck as he giggles with you.
If anyone else is around then Sean will perk up. He suddenly has 100 stories to tell at once and oh boy, if you thought his story-telling was bad whilst drunk or sober, just you wait until he tries telling a story whilst high.
He's actually really considerate to the other camp members; not smoking close to them, not being a nuisance, hushing you and himself to try and keep the noise down.
Munchies galore as well. Sean will prep before getting high, heading into town to buy allllll the unhealthy snacks so he can pig-out with you.
Please just offer to suck his dick, mid-convo. He'll go "ah, you took the words right out of my mouth!" and then turn into putty to your touches. He gets very sensitive.
Kieran
This boy is either the calmest being in the world, or gets really paranoid and almost whiteys.
Kieran has to be in a really calm setting with someone he fully trusts, meaning you. He can't smoke in camp, he'll get super skittish, worried that Bill will appear out of nowhere and finally snip his balls off.
He's relaxed for once, lying back on the bed and asking you to join him.
He's the type to talk about cliché things like "do you believe aliens are real?" and "I think I saw a ghost the other day but I ain't too sure..."
The conversation will then trail into deeper things, like both of your backstories and how you ended up here. Kierans sympathetic whilst sober but he looks like he's about to cry for you whilst he's high.
And he probably will. His emotions are heightened whilst he's in this state so don't be surprised if you over-hear him sobbing.
Will cuddle you without even thinking about it and then jump off you, apologising over and over for crossing a boundary. Just give him a cuddle and he'll relax again, maybe a kiss on the temple if he still seems a little shaken up.
Dutch
Probably the worst person to get high with. Ever.
Suuuuuper skittish, especially if you smoke with him from chapter 3 onwards.
Will ask you 100 questions at once about 100 topics at once. He needs to cover EVERYTHING, especially current life events and what the future holds.
If you notice him snacking then don't mention it, not unless you want Dutch to start sobbing whilst stuffing his face, telling you that "I can eat what I want! I'm a healthy weight, a little treat isn't going to hurt me, is it?"
But after an hour or two he'll mellow out, finally relaxing and realising how heavy his eyes feel.
I hope you weren't planning on sleeping in your own bed tonight because Dutch is going to fall asleep on you before you can even consider getting up and going to bed.
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on-the-shelves · 3 years
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on my shelf: soundtrack to MA year 1 - summer
That was the most stressful semester of my life, which is saying something since it was my 10th uni semester. It was all still online which has its benefits, sure (no commute! sleeping in! not having to get dressed properly!), but even an introvert like me likes to be around people sometimes. It really feels like everyone, including the lecturers, has kind of lost it at this point. That's the only explanation I can find for the unusual amount of work thrown at us. Okay now that that's out of the way, let's get to the ~music~
BTS: "Butter" and "Permission to Dance" (2021)
Summery goodness from BTS following last year's Dynamite that's just fun to listen to, to figure out the pop culture references to, and to cheer on as they make the Hot 100 their playing ground (thanks in big part to very dedicated US/PR Armys). "Butter" features very cool, more minimal verses with an explosive, big chorus. It's filled with calm confidence. Learning the previous English song "Dynamite's" lyrics was pretty difficult, but "Butter" was even harder, even for native speakers, which just makes BTS' efforts all the more impressive. I immediately loved "Permission To Dance" and its very musical-theater, feel-good vibe. It just makes you feel happy! Here I found the rap line's vocal chops especially impressive - I love how BTS is constantly trying out new things in all their music, including the English singles.
ITZY: GUESS WHO (2021)
This EP is a lot like ITZY's usual output in its bold confidence and electronic sound, but it feels more refined and even a bit more experimental this time around. Listening from top to bottom, there's a good flow where the songs don't blend into each other and can stand alone, but don't rub against each other either. My favourite is closer "Tennis (0:0)", their calmest song yet. The instrumentation is more traditional (featuring some acoustic guitars) and very minimal, so the focus is on the group's vocals. The melodies would work in a louder song too, which just makes this stripped back sound stand out even more.
TOMORROW X TOGETHER: The Chaos Chapter: Freeze (2021)
Following on from the album series The Dream Chapter and the summer album minisode 1: Blue Hour, TXT introduced a new chapter, that focuses on the confusing and conflicting feelings of growing up and showcases yet more diversity in their sound. This album features a lot more input musically and lyrically from the members, like Huening Kai produced rock juggernaut "Dear Sputnik", and feels all the more richer for it. In general, the album moves between clear rock ("Dear Sputnik", "0x1=Lovesong"), pop ("No Rules", "Magic"), hip-hop and electronic influences, sometimes also mixing them to create interesting fusions, like on "Freeze". The one thing that stays consistent throughout is the angst, in all its various forms. It doesn't ever go full on overboard emo with it though, making it more palatable. My top 3 songs are "No Rules", "0x1=Lovesong" and "Ice Cream". They recently released a repackaged album including two new songs: "LO$ER=LO♥ER" (emo rock that made me very happy to hear since it's executed so well) and "MOA Diary (Dubaddu Wari Wari)", a super cute fan song.
WENDY: Like Water (2021)
Red Velvet member and vocal powerhouse Wendy released her first solo EP, after having recovered from a serious injury she suffered at the end of 2019. The songs suit her voice perfectly. There's a lot of ballads, but she makes them sound effortless, even in the highest notes, where her voice stays rich and full. She's able to convey the emotions needed sincerely, without being overbearing, a lot of it owed to the lyrical topics centering around themes like being there for each other, instead of very heavy, sad ones. In the musically lighter songs, like "Why Can't You Love Me", she's skilled in her playfulness, with an audible smile. Wendy's love for music and singing is tangible and makes the EP feel very comforting to listen to.
IU: A Flower Bookmark, Pt. 2 (2017)
I'd been wanting to go through IU's older music since her new album Lilac was released this year, and doing so, I got stuck on this EP of reworked covers. I don't know any of the original songs, but if I hadn't known they were covers I would've never guessed it just by listening. IU has a knack for making things distinctly her own - no matter what style or genre she's trying out, she'll fit into it perfectly while still being recognisable. This EP features a range of different styles, from different decades and artists, but it all flows together, like they were always meant to be here. My favourites are "Autumn Morning" (featuring an acapella intro), "Last Night Story" (reminds me a lot of late 80s German rock, like the song "Westerland" by Die Ärzte, but more fun), and the pretty and calming "Everyday With You".
LOONA: [&] (2021)
Loona have become one of my favourite groups, even more so as I've been getting to know their pre-debut solo and sub-unit songs. So I was very happy when they returned this year with all 12 members for the first time since 2019. Lead single "PTT (Paint The Town)" is similar in sentiment (and somewhat in sound too) to their 2020 lead singles with its fierceness. It gives space to welcome Haseul back too, even presenting her as a risen phoenix in the music video. At first I felt like the song "WOW" would've been better as lead single but then I couldn't get "PTT" out of my head for days every time I listened to it, so I had to admit it was the right choice. [&] feels like a mixture between what a lot of fans call "typical Loona" and the direction they went in on previous EP 12:00, especially on city-pop leaning closer "U R". My favourites are the bouncier "WOW" and "Be Honest", as well as "U R".
Some singles I loved:
Ji Jin Seok: "Come With Me" (2021)
-> a chill, K-R&B summer track featuring Ji Jin Seok's beautiful, calm voice
Epik High: "Rain Song" (2021)
-> perfect for rainy days. walks the line between sad and okay perfectly.
JOY: "Hello" (2021)
-> fun, upbeat song (actually a reworked cover!) that showcases Red Velvet member Joy's vocal colour perfectly. the album (also reworked covers) is lovely too, but I didn't listen to the full thing that much.
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leizzxre · 4 years
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dizzy
masterlist
im jaebeom x reader
synopsis: he’s ur awkward vampire roommate, and u are super weird
hi, long time no see!! my brain was overloading, thank u for still supporting the blog <3333 its going to be a year starting june 16th! i hope u all are well! :)
      Jaebeom read the same sentence for the tenth time, his concentration now set on the sudden shift in your heartbeat. It drummed in his ears; it made his eyebrows twitch. He could hear the rush of blood in your veins quicken, a nervous tremor in your breath. The bounce of his knee eventually matches the same tempo.
     You were always a noisy roommate, but this was distracting Jaebeom more than usual.
      What’s going on inside that head? No, he won’t think too hard on it. He tries to ignore it, that panging interest itching the back of his neck, with a shift in his posture. Jaebeom flips a page, realizes he never read the last paragraph, and flips back. His fingers tap around the back of the book cover, he sniffles, and pushes his glasses further up his nose. 
     “Hey Jaebeom?” Finally.
     He looks at your figure standing in the kitchen, your back still facing him. You twist awkwardly on your heels before looking back. Jaebeom’s trying to play down the whiplash he got with fingers combing behind his ear.
     “Y-yeah?” Jaebeom’s voice cracked; he doesn’t know why.
     “Can I ask you a question? It’s not that important, it’s just been nagging at me,” your bottom lip trapped between teeth.
      Jaebeom sets his book down, forgetting to bend the corner of his last page, “Sure.”
      He’s looking at your fingers wringing together. Your heartbeat is loud, and it surrounds him. Jaebeom starts to feel really dizzy.
      “Why haven’t you ever fed on me?”
      Jaebeom bit his on his tongue at the question, and winces at the pain. He jolts up and rests his posture once again, “H-huh?’
      “Like, that’s a thing you do, right? I don’t know! Just why haven’t you ever attempted to you know, prey on me?” You voice rose and fell about six different times, your hands flying around as Jaebeom tried to follow them with wide eyes. Prey? Oh my god.
      “You’re anemic.”
      “What does that mean?”
      “Drinking your blood is like,” he looks at what’s resting on the counter behind you, “eating an expired ramen cup.”
       Your mouth falls open, perplexed.  Jaebeom really doesn’t mind that though, your heartbeat slowed a little.
       “That’s not funny.”
       “Why did you ask?”
       There’s a frown on your face now, you turn from Jaebeom and he can finally exhale- you’re so weird to him. You’re picking up your ramen cup before you set it down once again, turning back to glare back at Jaebeom. He holds his breath again as you get closer.
       “It just seems interesting that we’ve been roommates for almost a year, and you haven’t, you know, attacked me,” you shrug as you sit beside him on the couch and tuck your feet in and under your thighs, “But now I just found out I’m apparently undesirable.” Why do you look mad over that?
       “You’re not undesirable.” He meant that, maybe not in the same way you wanted it to.
        It was sort of an accident how you found out about the vampire thing.  His “juice box” fell, and it took about an hour or so to ease your panic by letting you know it was only pig’s blood- and about another 20 minutes to get the knife out of your hands. But you guys were cool now, at least enough to have your Capri Sun’s next to his own drinks in the refrigerator.
       Jaebeom actually appreciated the bond you had created, and was relieved that he didn’t have to keep his life much of a secret anymore. He was fairly new to this life, and it left him frustrated most nights to know he’d never be “normal” again.  So, you knowing who he was made living at home a lot easier, he even formed a bit of a crush knowing he could trust you more- not that he’d admit that to himself.
      He enjoyed your presence is all. You laughed together- helped each other out. You made him feel normal again.
      Not right now though. You’re staring at him weird.
      “Oh.” Are you blushing? He can’t really tell, you won’t look at him anymore, instead focusing on your nailbeds. Though, Jaebeom almost flew back to the other side of the couch when you stared back to him again. Your eyes sparkled with something that scared him, and your heartbeat sped up again.
      “What does it feel like?”
      “What?!” You shuffle closer, Jaebeom scoots back.
      “Getting bit?”
       Jaebeom’s turn to look away, he twists his fingers together on his lap. You lean back a little to give him space, and you gnaw at your lip, “Hey I’m sor- “
       “You want to find out?” You’ve always been way too curious anyway.
       You fumble, “I-is that okay? Am I going to turn into one too?”
       Jaebeom’s eyes shock you a bit. They tinted red, almost glowed. It wasn’t that noticeable just by the look, but it was his overall aura that changed, the room felt darker- colder. You didn’t look away though, your gaze held- strengthened even.
       “Not unless my intentions allow for it. You should be fine.”
       Your nod was short, “Okay.”
       Jaebeom didn’t give much of a warning, but he was slow. A moment to sit closer, another to lean towards you. It was as if time swam through a thick air. When his palm finally reached your shoulder, you shuddered, and Jaebeom hesitated there.
       Your heartbeat was quieter, and it confused him a bit. It was the calmest it’s been throughout tonight, though whether should he still continue held him in place awkwardly.
       That’s when your head tilts back, your neck now open to him, and your eyes closed. He takes another moment to lean closer, his cold breath reaching your skin, just before sharp fangs.
       Once he sank in, Jaebeom immediately wanted to take back what he said about your iron deficiency, he was completely wrong. You tasted like honey, way better than pig’s bloo- there was a tap on his shoulder.
       “Hey Jae? I feel dizzy.”
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kyunsies · 3 years
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send this to blogs anonymously and ask them to ship their moots with monsta x
YAAAAY i can finally do this with my moots <3 sorry this took me so long anonnie i was completely exhausted last night lol but here we are!!! i’m going to do friendly ships just in case someone feels uncomfortable so i hope you’re okay with that!!!!!
shownu -> will not accept any answer if it’s not @softhyungkyun / miss victoria!!! i feel as tho the stars are aligned ever so right (like in hercules hehe) for these two to become friends!! vic has this INSANE and i mean insane calm energy like i know this girl does have some stresses in her life but would ya know?? absolutely not lol. doesn’t let anything get to her, literally the calmest person i know and DONT TELL ME their humor just doesn’t match up perfectly?? so spot on it’s kind of scary and don’t tell vic this but perhaps she herself was shownu in a past life <3 lol
wonho -> my man wonho provides emotional strength!!!! and i feel @joosgf is the perfect recipient of his loving 🥺 sweet lulu deserves only the kindest attention plus i just want to give her the biggest hug and i feel wonho would be perfect <3 part of the lulu protection squad bc she’s just an angel and lulu bub i know u probably wanted jooheon but SILLY he’s your bf 💕💖💕💖
minhyuk -> this is an unexpected combo i feel but @imnameimss needs minhyuk in her life!!! my girl suni is stressed (we co exist in the nursing student universe and we hate the suffering lol) so not only will minhyuk provide comfort and support but will also take her mind away from life’s daily burdens <3 plus suni is one of the funniest people i know so could u imagine the shenanigans that would take place !!!!! watch out everybody this is a dynamic duo right here 👀
kihyun -> my most motherly moot deserves a housewife-like best friend and who other could this be than @chaotichae <3 JDBJD my sweet nessa is so calm and lovely and exudes such comfort and i also get these vibes from kihyun too :) also nessa i see u in the tags sometimes u can be savage and i love that about u <3 so kihyun is just a perfect fit i think it would be a great friendship even tho u have him on the divorce list hehe
hyungwon -> my love my life @mcnbebe needs a hyungwon!!!!! my kyuntent buddy is .... very stressed and i want to give her everything that is calm and comforting in life and hyungwon would provide that for her!!! a quiet cheerleader who will be there for her on the bad days and good days 🥺 also aminah has a crazy sense of humor one that i think is the funniest i’ve come across in a long time HH and i think she would make hyungwon laugh as well 💖 ily miss aminah and i hope you’re doing okay!!!
jooheon -> this would be such a dynamic friendship AH i feel my gal pal @wonheons would be a great fit with mr joohoney one hunnit !!!! lissa is one of the most supportive people i know, she’s been there for me <3 and joo is such a big cheerleader for his members so i feel these two would just hype each other up for everything 💖 plus lissa i feel has those creative juices flowing at any given time NDNDJD so i just think they would bounce some cool idea off each other a lot, it would be a great time <3
changkyun -> you’re going to think i’m bonkers like absolutely bananas but !!!!!! miss amy @minhyukie i name u kyun’s best friend <3 LOL and it’s only bc amy literally is one of my very trusted friends i would trust her with anything i say at face value, she is so open and honest with me, and she has told me countless times to like, trust what i feel is right? don’t worry about what people think? and if i had a dollar for every time she’s said “it’s just tumblr dot com” LOL so kyun and her would be great bc they simply Do Not Have The Time for criticism!! they do their own thing and they are happy with that <3
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wanderingcas · 4 years
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☆ for @cottondean, as a part of her benefits on my Patreon! thank you so much for your support:’) ☆ prompt: a college au where big, tough (*cough* softie) football player!Dean calls entomology major!Cas to come get a spider out of his kitchen because his roommate is gone
. . . 
There’s a certain part of the quad that Castiel loves to sit. It’s a small field of grass with two large oak trees, far away from the busy shuffling of students walking from class to class. It’s the only patch of nature he can seem to find within a five-mile radius in the bustling city. 
Before he buries his head into the textbook for his Insect Behavior lecture, he takes a moment to tilt his head back against the tree and squint up at the sun, shattered by the hundreds of leaves fluttering in the gentle wind. He takes a large breath and sighs. It’s the calmest part of his day. The only peace he can find with his back-to-back classes, labs, homework, and it’s just lovely to be able to sit and—
His phone buzzes obnoxiously in his jeans pocket. He opens an eye and glares at it. Closes his eyes and tries to find his peace again. The phone vibrates again, this time louder and more insistent. 
With a sigh, he fishes out his phone and flips it open. 
Hey, this is Cas, right? It’s Dean Winchester, we were in Biology lab together last semester. Okay this is a weird thing to text, but you like bugs and everything, right? Well I don’t, and there’s this spider and it’s HUGE like this might be a freaking tarantula and can you kill it? Kevin usually does but he’s out of town.
Castiel stares at the block of text. Another text message comes in: 
Kevin’s my roommate. I should have mentioned that 
He’s pushing the button to respond when another text buzzes in his palm: 
OMG it’s on my cookies!! Wtf!! 
“What the fuck indeed,” Castiel agrees in a low tone. He clicks the call button and holds the phone to his ear.
“Oh hey,” comes Dean’s deceptively breezy voice over the receiver.
“Dean?” Castiel asks. “Are you okay? Your texts seemed very… distressed.”
“Me? Distressed? No way. You can ignore that. I took care of it. I just—” Dean abruptly makes a very high-pitched noise. 
“The spider is still there, isn’t it?” Castiel asks.
“It’s staring at me, Cas. I think it can smell fear.” 
“Oh my god.” Castiel pinches the bridge of his nose. “I can be at your apartment in five minutes. Do you still live in the same room?”
“Yes,” Dean whispers. 
Castiel stands and shoulders his backpack. “Why are you whispering?”
“Did you not hear me when I said this is a devil spider?” 
Castiel sighs as he begins to walk to the Circle Apartments across campus. “Well, just make sure not to make any sudden movements, or it may think you’re prey to hunt.” 
“Oh my god, Cas, why the fuck would you tell me—”
“I’m kidding,” Castiel sighs. “I’ll be there soon.” 
Another text comes in as he ends the call. Charlie’s quick text flashes across the screen.
U @ the tree?
Castiel texts back, No. Going to help a friend.
ooOOO who??
Castiel glances around before typing out, Fall semester hot lab partner. 
Rolling his eyes at the caps locked letters he gets back from Charlie, he shuts his phone. Telling only his best friend Charlie about his crush on Dean Winchester is already one person too many. 
Castiel remembers Dean’s apartment’s location from the night they studied for the Biology lab final together. They had sat on Dean’s bed, listening to Led Zeppelin while Castiel quizzed Dean (being an Entomology major, he knew most of the material from his AP Bio classes in high school, so didn’t need to study as much). He still remembers the tint of blush in Dean’s cheeks whenever Castiel praised Dean for his correct answers. 
“You’re actually making me think I can get this stuff,” Dean had said. “I always thought I was too dumb to get this science crap. Not a ton of time to focus on academics, with the football scholarship and all.”
“Of course you can get it,” Castiel said. “You’re far from stupid, Dean.” 
When Dean had grinned widely at that, Castiel had decided that he’d love to put a thousand more smiles on his handsome face.
Castiel shakes his head as he climbs the stairs to Dean’s apartment door. He lost his chance with Dean months ago; he needs to remember that.
He’s barely rapping his knuckles against the door before it bursts open. Dean yanks him inside. “Hurry, it disappeared! I think it went under the stove!” 
Castiel stumbles into the narrow hallway, catching himself with a hand against the wall. He stares at Dean, who is dressed in nothing but gym shorts and a thin white t-shirt, oven mitts on his hands and a colander on his head.
“What in the hell are you wearing?” Castiel asks.
“Defensive gear,” Dean replies, like it’s the most obvious thing in the world. 
Castiel blinks. “Um—” 
Dean grabs Castiel’s arm and pulls him toward the kitchen. “C’mon, dude, it’s getting away!” 
“Dean, it’s not going to hurt you,” Castiel says as he trips after him. “Most spiders in this region don’t even bite.”
“Yeah, most, but knowing my luck this one will.” Dean pushes Castiel forward, hiding behind his back. “Okay, now, go do your… bug whispering.”
“My chosen major does not mean I whisper to bugs,” Castiel says.
“You know what I mean. Go, like… beat it into submission.”
Castiel sighs. He carefully walks across the linoleum kitchen floor, careful not to step on the small creature in case it decides to run under his feet. He spots the spider climbing its way up the side of the stove. 
“Hey, little one,” Castiel says softly. Based on the lack of distinct marks on its brown body, it’s likely a harmless cellar spider. Holding out his hand, he stops the spider’s trek with his fingers, cupping it in his palm. He ignores Dean’s horrified gasp behind him.
“You’ve had a busy afternoon,” Castiel murmurs to the small spider in his hands. He stands and turns toward Dean. “Can you open a window?”
Dean scrunches his face into a frown. “But it’ll just come right back in.”
“It’s warm outside. It’s likely that it’ll simply go look for food.” 
“Ugh. Fine.” Dean tentatively steps past Castiel and opens the balcony screen door. “Put it out here, I guess.” 
Castiel walks out onto the porch and carefully deposits the spider onto the railing. “Good luck,” he says as it scurries away. 
“You’re safe now,” he tells Dean tonelessly as he walks back into the kitchen, sliding the balcony door closed. 
Dean sighs and pulls off the oven mitts. “Thanks. I hate those things.”
“May I suggest that you may have arachnophobia?” Castiel asks. 
“How can you not with those things?” Dean dramatizes a shudder. “They’re nasty.”
Castiel shrugs. “I think they’re quite beautiful.”
Dean gives him a strange look. Huffs a laugh. “You know, I forgot how quirky you are.” 
“It has been a few months since our class concluded.” 
“Yeah. I guess.” 
Castiel pointedly does not mention, or think about, the awkward moment that made them stop speaking again after the end of the semester. 
Dean waves a hand. “Well, anyway, thanks man. For helping me out, and all.” 
The moment that Dean had leaned toward him on the bed, only inches between them, his eyes closing—
How fear made Castiel quickly jump off the bed, avoiding the kiss at all. 
“It’s no problem,” Castiel says quickly, shutting off his line of thinking. He avoids looking at Dean’s lips. “I should probably get back to studying.”  
“Oh, yeah. Sure.” Dean rubs at the back of his head. His hair is sticking up wildly after taking the colander off his head. “You know, I’m in another Biology class, actually.”
Castiel’s eyebrows raise. “Oh really?”
“Yeah.” Dean grins. “Kinda was inspired by you, actually. You made me like that last class, so I thought… why not another one?”
Castiel feels something in his chest lighten. He smiles. “Oh, that’s—that’s good.” 
They both stand awkwardly, staring at their feet. “You know—” Dean says as Castiel begins, “I should—”
Dean smiles. Castiel hides a laugh behind his hand. “You go,” he says. 
“I was just gonna say, uh—” Dean waves a hand toward the living room. “I was actually about to study, too, if you, well… want company?” He quickly adds, “I can make you dinner for helping with the spider, too.”
Castiel says, “I do remember your cooking being delicious.” 
Dean’s face lights up with a grin. “So you’ll stay?” 
“Yes. Besides, if any insects come flocking at the smell of food, I will need to be here to protect you.” 
Dean rolls his eyes and aims an oven mitt at Castiel’s head. Castiel ducks, this time letting his laugh resound throughout the kitchen. 
They barely get any studying done; Castiel doesn’t mind. He’s perfectly content sitting in Dean’s sunny living room, watching Dean animatedly show Castiel each of his records and ramble off facts over the booming bass. Castiel complains about his classes, propped against the counter with a glass of wine in hand, as Dean cooks pasta. 
They watch Casablanca on the couch; it was Dean’s mom’s favorite movie, and coincidentally, Castiel’s. Not that they make it far; they’re in each other’s arms, kissing and ripping off each other’s shirts like their lives depend on it, barely five minutes into the movie. 
Castiel is lying contentedly on Dean’s bare chest and listening to his heartbeat when he murmurs, “I hope more spiders come into your kitchen.” 
He feels Dean kiss the top of his head. “Y’know what? Me too.”
. . . 
☆my patreon☆ ☆my ko-fi☆
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lihikainanea · 4 years
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Can we discuss Tiger acknowledging Gustaf’s sensual essence. She’s not attracted to him in a legit way, but she recognizes how he’s just a walking sexual being and Bill finds this out and is just like please no. He’s a little jealous but also insecure cause that’s his big bro who he’s closest to and that’s his rock. Bill feels all the feelings.
Look man, Gustaf’s sensual essence is just....it’s impossible to ignore. I know little to nothing about this human, and yet I feel like I know his soul. Gustaf is good people. He’s calm people. He’s kind people. And while I’m still reeling from that sweet, sweet--god SO SWEET photo of him and his grandmother that he posted awhile ago (I think it was Mother’s Day in Europe?I can’t remember) but he’s just....Gustaf is one of those dudes that you never quite get over. Even if you’ve broken up, even if it’s years down the line, somehow--you always still think about a dude like Gustaf. And you wonder. You wonder if he’s well, if he’s found someone he's happy with. You wonder what he’s up to, if he ever ended up getting that motorcycle that he could never shut up about. You wonder if he still drinks his coffee black, if he still takes a bubble bath at least once a week and listens to Enya. You just...wonder.
But like look, you know what gets me here? Is maybe tiger acknowledges his sensuality, his mystique, in a far more subtle way--which in turn, just makes Bill so much more angry.
Hear me out.
So I like to think of tiger as a little ball of absolute fucking fire--she’s bitey, snappy, sassy, angry all the time and quite loud about it. She’s just hell on wheels, and Bill is her big calm dude who is always even-keeled and mild mannered. Ever notice how big dudes tend to be the most gentle? They tend to be the calmest? It’s because they know they can win the fight. All these other little dudes have to puff their chests out like peacocks, full of machismo and male ego, trying to prove a point. Big dudes are rarely like that. They don’t gotta prove nothin’.
In any case, maybe it’s the famed Skarsgard family camping trip and tiger has been even more high strung because of work stress. Tiger is basically being insufferable to Valter, and she’s sniping at Bill but he’s taking it in stride because he loves her anger. Gustaf though, Gustaf just watches it all calmly. Gustaf plots. He observes, but then he waits.
And maybe when tiger is having tea out by the dock, he comes over with a big blanket, undoes it, places it on her lap.
“Did you know,” he starts lowly, sitting down and resting his forearms on his knees, “That your shoulders are up by your ears?”
Tiger glares.
“All that tension must hurt,” he said, “Come on, take a deep breath.”
And tiger--like any warm blooded female--tiger has a bit of a soft spot for Gustaf. He’s not one you sass. So instead she huffs a bit because she just has to voice her displeasure somehow, but then she does it--takes a big, deep inhale through her nose, and breathes it out slowly through her mouth.
“Good,” he says, “Stand up for a second.”
And the difference is, Gustaf--much like Bill--doesn’t give tiger a chance to say no. He stands, takes her mug and places it on the table, then pulls her up gently, walking behind her.
“I tend to carry all of my tension right....here,” he pokes between her shoulder blades and she’s wound so tightly that she flinches, “And it seems you do too.”
Two big hands wrap around her shoulders, and she instinctively stands a little taller.
“Deep breath again,” he says. Tiger inhales, and on the exhale, Gustaf pulls her shoulders back. She nearly sags in relief, feeling the ball of tension in her back easing.
“Again,” he says, “And this time, try to pull away from me.”
So she takes a deep breath, and as he pulls her shoulders towards him, she resists and tries to pull them forward.
“Oh my god,” she moans at the deep stretch, “Oh fuck.”
He makes her do it three more times, and at the end he just runs his hands down her arms, throws the blanket over her shoulders.
“Tomorrow morning,” he says, “Sunrise. Out here.”
“Oh, no. No no. I don’t do mornings. I sleep through sunrises.”
But he smiles gently, runs a thumb across the deep bags under one eye.
“You’re not sleeping at all these days,” he says. And without another word, he retreats into the house.
And like, look. For a solid week, tiger joins him out on that dock, and he starts introducing her to yoga. Maybe a bit of meditation. Just very, very gentle stuff--no tough poses, nothing that hurts, just focused a lot more on breathing. And tiger is....slowly becoming much more peaceful, under his tutelage. And she starts to cherish those mornings, because Gustaf is sensual but tiger doesn’t feel it in a sensual way. She kind of just...she wants to cuddle Gustaf. Just wants to be in his presence, because he’s so incredibly calming and so nurturing. Gustaf is good people, he always was. So tiger spends nearly every morning with him and she comes back refreshed, calm, positive, invigorated. And Bill isn’t really any the wiser, because he sleeps like a log with the country air and tiger is usually back before he can even wake up.
But Bill notices one rainy afternoon, when they’re all in the living room playing Mario Kart. She’s on the couch and he’s on the floor in front of her, her legs over his shoulders as he strokes idly at them, his nose in a book. But he’s keeping an eye on the screen--and this is the fifth straight round that tiger has lost spectacularly. She’s either gone flying off the rainbow road or Valter has annihilated her with a tortoise shell of death--every round--and Bill flinches a little, in anticipation of the impending storm. He waits for it, ready to catch the controller that will for sure go flying by his head en route to his brother’s, maybe he even grips her ankle a little tighter to get a better hold in case she decides to fling HERSELF at Valter’s head. He clenches his jaw, wincing already and just hoping the trail of cusswords isn’t screamed too loudly or too closely to his ear.
But instead, he hears the controller be placed gently back on the couch, and he hears tiger take in three deep breaths--calming, rhythmic, steadying. And he peers up at her curiously just in time to see her eyes reopening, her shoulders lowering back to their normal position. And he’s just about to ask her if she’s feeling alright, until it happens.
It happens.
Gustaf reaches over, and gently taps the back of his knuckles on her bicep.
“Atta girl,” he says, “Doesn’t that feel better?”
Bill’s blood runs cold. 
And it’s not that he thinks Gustaf would ever do something, it’s not that he thinks TIGER would ever do something--it’s just that Gustaf’s aura is addictive, it’s undeniable, and Bill is a jealous bean when it comes to his Little Human. And this type of thing happens all the time with brothers, it’s normal. Bill isn’t threatened so much as he is just...a little irrational about it all. And he’s also pretty disturbed because he loves tiger’s fire, and he loves his role in it--tiger gets all up in ends about everything and it’s Bill’s job to smooth it out, calm her down, make her feel better. He likes being that person for her, he likes being her balm and her sense of reason with everything.
And in true Bill fashion, I’ll bet he lets it eat away at him for the entire day. Doesn’t say a word. Doesn’t even squeak when Gustaf and tiger get into a really deep conversation about the powers of the psyche, the depths of the mind, ways of using emotions to control physical reactions in your body. Tantra. Bill doesn’t say a word.
But later on that night as they’re getting ready for bed, tiger pulls him down for a sweet kiss.
“I like this,” she runs her thumb over his scruff, “It’s sexy.”
“Why didn’t you yell at Valter?” he asks suddenly. Tiger looks at him, confused.
“What?”
“Valter needs to be yelled at,” Bill pulls his face from her hands and walks over to the door, opening it and jutting his chin.
“Go yell at him.”
Tiger is dumbfounded, and Bill eventually sighs heavily and slams the door shut a little too hard.
“Why are you so calm?” he demands.
“Why are you so...not calm?” she asks, “Bud, what’s going on?”
“Tiger, I like your fire. I like that you’re just....always angry. Because then I get to be the one who comes in and...helps. And I know you don’t need my help, but I like being that guy for you. I like that you get all angry and pissed off and that you snap at everything, because I like how it feels when I’m the only one who can talk you down,” he say, “Until, apparently, I’m not the only one who can talk you down.”
But tiger’s not an idiot. She knows there’s more.
“And what else?” she prompts. Bill shifts those big eyes of his, but tiger just crosses her arms.
“And you’re in love with Gustaf,” he mutters.
“There it is.”
She sighs, walks to him, wrapping her arms around his waist.
“Bill, I’m not in love with Gustaf,” she says, “He has good energy. He was showing me tricks to try and relax a bit more.”
“But he’s....tiger, every single female on this planet is in love with Gustaf,” he pouts, “All this energy meditative calming tantra bullshit. He’s all sensual and mysterious and--”
“Bill,” she cuts him off, “So are you. Do you ever wonder maybe where you might get that from?”
His pout deepens, but he stays silent.
“Buddy, you have the closest bond with Gustaf because you two are so much alike,” she continues, “You have good in your soul. You have kindness in your soul, god just the way you take care of me is incredible. Your calm nature, your empathy. These things can't be taught, but they can be cherished and nurtured. And I think Gustaf did that for you.”
She plunks her head on his chest, puckers her lips for a kiss and he bends slightly, lays a soft peck on her mouth.
“I’m intrigued by Gustaf. Calm people intrigue me. But I’m not in love with Gustaf. I’m not even attracted to Gustaf.” she says, “It’s you, Billy Goat. You. You you you.”
He kisses her softly again, but then he pouts.
“There’s a ‘u’ in Gustaf.”
“Bill.”
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Hi! I've loved reading your hc's so far, keep it up!
I was wondering if you could write about the RFA + saeran going on a holiday together to a tropical island or something like that after everything has been worked out? You could do it with just MC or all of them together, whichever you prefer <3
It'd also be nice if you could include V and Vandy but I totally get if you're still feeling a bit uncomfortable writing them :)
zen: - He really enjoys the attention that he’s getting when he’s at the beach lolol - but your attention matters the most to him, of course <3 he just likes the validation - it’s been forever since you guys have had a break, so he’s definitely gonna take this opportunity to do everything that he can!!! - which… might mean you get burnt out in one day lolol - but he’s willing to just spend some days in your hotel if you want to !! - and do other things ?? ;0 - he takes you to a fancy restaurant just as an excuse to see you dressed up :))) - overall he really enjoys the quality time he spends with you!! A lot of the time you guys are just working together, so being able to relax and just spend time in each others company is his favorite thing about the trip <33 Yoosung: - he feels very nervous HJBHJBSRG - of course, you guys have been living together for awhile, and you are used to each others presence - but, you know him - he gets flustered over everything - at the beach, he’s constantly looking away from you - it’s not because he’s avoiding you or anything, he’s just Extremely nervous and seeing you in a swimsuit makes him ;;;;; - in the end though, he lightens up and begins to enjoy himself :)) - you visit the arcade !! and ofc he wants to give it a try - if you wanted him to, he’d try to win you a plushie from the crane machine - key word try - but it’s cute to watch him struggle >:) Jaehee: - she is Very Much happy about this - she spent many a day at her old job daydreaming about white sands and relaxing on an island - and now she can do that!!! - but having you along with her makes that fantasy even better - she absolutely loves the beach !!! - she feels a little awkward about wearing a swimsuit but she gets over it when she feels the water HOOSOKFP - making a sandcastle, playing beach volleyball - she feels like she’s living out parts of her childhood that she never got to live :)) - she’s definitely into sight seeing as well - there’s a mountain on the island that she was Very insistent on seeing - and God was it worth it - it might have been the altitude but seeing her surrounded by that scenery was breathtaking :))
Jumin: - in all honesty trips don’t mean that much to him - he can call on his private jet whenever he wants, after all- perks of being rich - but for some reason, when he saw your face light up at the thought of being able to visit a tropical island? - this trip meant the world to him - he planned every detail (he got jaehee to do it but..) - he wanted to make sure that you would enjoy every aspect of the trip that they could encounter!! - part of those details was… renting a private beach - it was mostly so that  you would have the beach to yourself- - but also, so that he wouldn’t have to deal with paparazzi taking pictures for their magazines - he avoids the water the whole time JKSNRGJK .. he doesn’t particularly like the feeling of the ocean - but he does enjoy watching you from afar - also you Bet this mf has the best restaurants lined up for you - best formalwear he could find for you; he wants to make you feel like royalty = and with this man? You do. Seven: - seven likes the idea of having a vacation - key word: idea - this boy is still very uncomfortable being in public spaces - you can’t just get someone who’s spent 90% in front of a computer to be comfortable in tourist spots immediately, y’know? - so he’s definitely kinda tense - thankfully!! He has you there to help him relax a bit - and he is going to cling to you the entire time entirely because of that fact lol - but eventually he does lighten up and start having fun!! - u guys rent a floaty and he flips you off of it lol - most of all though he likes the hotel - while he’s stayed in them for his old job many times it feels different when he’s not putting his life on the line akjsngjk - just laying with you in bed, watching TV and cuddling you while the sun shines onto his skin through the window is probably the calmest he’s ever felt in his life - it’s amazing, and it makes him want to feel like this for the rest of his life
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