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#domestic bagginshield

“How did you come to take an interest in such a large vegetable, umral?” Thorin smoothed the last handful of mulch with his trowel and sat back on his heels to wipe away a trickle of sweat from his brow.

“Oh there’s a little everyday glory to growing something bigger than yourself, isn’t there!” Bilbo offered Thorin his handkerchief, but held it out of reach til Thorin had tugged off his dirty gardening gloves. “And anyway, think of the food!” Bilbo shut his eyes rapturously and pressed one hand to his heart, “Pumpkin mash, roast pumpkin, pumpkin soup, pumpkin pudding, pumpkin cake, pumpkin pie, pumpkin pickles, pumpkin ale, pumpkin punch! Oh Thorin, pumpkin ice cream!” Bilbo was in such a state at the idea that he was compelled to brace himself against the pumpkin and sip from the glass of cordial he’d brought out for Thorin’s refreshment. 

“That is rather tremendous pressure on my appetite,” said Thorin, somewhat gravely as he was enjoying himself far more than would be advisable to let on. “Though I suppose the biggest is destined for the fair and some Sackville Baggins comeuppance?”

Bilbo wisely did not hear the last bit, “Oh my love, I have every faith in your appetite.” 

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BUT IMAGINE tiny Frodo running up to Bilbo and Thorin and saying “kisses, uncles!” and both of them scooping him up in between them and just covering him in kisses and tickling him and they all tumble to the floor in a heap laughing and out of breath and they just lay there for a couple of minutes being happy and content and UGH

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Also: Frodo doesn't like wearing clothes. He has sprinted into the council froom naked several Times.

Thorin claims it is a sign that Frodo is showing his masculinity; he’s showing his manly-pseudo-dwarf-ness and each time he finds himself chuckling into his hand because it makes the council members groan and meetings are “ended early” because Thorin has to take care of his little proud boy.

He’s a proud Papa, just saying.

Bilbo either sighs—when Thorin brings back their little buck-naked boy to the quarters—or shrieks when Frodo appears to him in person when he’s at the meetings; because whoops, this is probably his fault. Hobbit traditions, after all. Children have always ran through the Shire without a care, and Bilbo remembers his own childhood being similar.

But things are different now, he tells himself, and he tells his boy, and Frodo is cutely confused each time his Mama tells him that he has to wear clothes if he wants to run around; naked in his own bedroom is fine, but not when he wants to walk around with people.

“But I just want to be like you when you were a kid, Mama!” Frodo exclaims and that makes Bilbo sigh, and hold him close, saying,

“Unfortunately my lad, things are different now. Things are different here. And you get to be your own child, dear one.”

Of course, Thorin overhears the conversation and has an idea come to his head.

So when one day there’s a second, smaller, and still private garden adjacent to Bilbo’s own, it comes a surprise to the royal family, save for Thorin himself.

“So he can run around and have fun….just like the Shire.” He murmurs as Frodo giggles and runs off amongst the flowers, while Thorin himself strokes his lover’s curls.

“…Thank you, darling…” Bilbo gives him the sunniest smile and Thorin knows it’s probably obvious—there’s still some guilt there that he took the two most important people in his life away from their ancestral home, miles and miles away from everything they’ve always known but he’s selfish. He can’t let them go and Bilbo doesn’t want to be let go, either.

So they’ll make do and it works for Frodo rolls around in the trees without a care and Bilbo watches and laughs, while Thorin settles on the grass beside him.

“You know, you can walk around in your garden naked too.” Thorin teases him, and Bilbo gently bops his shoulder, but doesn’t necessarily disagree.

He may not be in the Shire anymore, but home’s not a hill—it’s the people that build the hills or crack the rocks or plant the trees.

And Thorin’s given him a garden that he’ll never abandon or leave to die. And that’s what fills his heart with so much joy, at the end of each day.

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Frodo plays matchmaker for the company during spring because 'everyone should be in love in spring!' Dwarrow dames are only amused by the little boy. The company? Not so much, ranging from horror to embarrassment.

Gonna be honest: Thorin gets a KICK OUT OF THIS. Why? Because everyone in the company—and their wives, mothers, and families once they returned—wanted him to hook up with Bilbo and kept being all BUT HE’S FORGIVEN YOU and HANG WITH HIM IN THE GARDEN and YOU TWO ARE SO CUTE WHEN’S THE WEDDING?

So he gets a bit of sick joy out of when Frodo first mention that he thinks Mister Dwalin really likes Mister Ori.

Thorin smiles behind his paper and oh, he may just mention that everyone should be in love in the spring, right my boy? That’s what Mama said!

And Frodo heartily agrees and just goes about saying that to everyone and it begins.

Keep reading

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Frodo hates spiders. So does Bilbo. And Thorin. Dis has to stomp on them.

That’s what they get for encountering spiders on the adventure.

See, Bilbo’s always hated them because you cannot squish those things with your feet when you’re a hobbit it’s just a big no-no. And of course the giant spiders that nearly ATE THEM ALL IN THE WOODS YES THAT DID HAPPEN.

He probably shouldn’t have told Frodo all those stories because now the poor lad is also terrified too.

Thorin tries to play it cool—after all, manly, muscular dwarf here—but every time one of them comes into the bedroom or living quarters he sort of just freezes up and scoffs that that webbing is disgusting (which it is—baaaad memories of being in that webbing, guys) and just says DIS! CAN YOU TAKE CARE OF THIS? I’M…BUSY when in all actuality he’s not and he grumps about it for hours on end.

Frodo will one day grow out of it and want a tarantula, I’m sure—and Bilbo will faint and Thorin will just pale and tell him “….maybe when you’re older”.

“But Pa, I’m already nearly twenty-”


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Frodo is hilarious at counsel meetings. Thorin loves bringing him along. Bilbo is not amused.


You’re doing this on purpose I’m on to you Steph.

It’s mostly because Frodo is great at asking adorable innocent questions that make the other counsel members narrow their eyebrows and huff like old fogies. Or just saying adorable statements and you can’t fault him because he’s young and ‘doesn’t know better’

“You have a long beard, Mister Owin. How do you keep it so well groomed?”

“I don’t like it when Mister Cawlin yells. Why does he do that? Is he always mad?”

“I say we break for tea.” (Bilbo actually likes that one, half the time he usually shouts YES! with a cracking voice because he just can’t).

“My Papa is better than your Papa.” (Thorin’s smug. Bilbo kicks him under the table.)

“Ew, paperwork.” (Thorin likes this one a LOT).

“Papa didn’t finish that treaty because he and Mama were busy last night! They were yelling lots and lots and praising Mahal…But I think Mama was in pain because he kept saying-”


Thus, Frodo can’t go to every meeting—even the royal couple needs a break now and then from their perceptive son.

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Fourth! Only because I can't sleep: Dwalin doesn't like seeing Frodo get picked on. He teaches him some swordplay. Bilbo has a panic attack.

Heck yes give me all the feels of domesticity this causes me emotional heartburn in a lot of good and bad ways ahaha.

Dwalin’s actually a really, really good teacher! Granted, the first time Frodo saw him he did NOT faint from fear (Bilbo attests he didn’t either, but Dwalin likes to tease him that he nearly did) and instead went “…You’re bld but have inkys’ because he didn’t know the word for ‘inkings’.

Bilbo of course, doesn’t know—Thorin does, because Captain of the Guard and all—and of course, when he does find out, there’s a scream, there’s a swoon (Dwalin catches him, Thorin pouts) and Frodo’s just swinging a wooden sting around really happily and singing.

There’s an argument later, of course, after Bilbo stops hyperventilating—he doesn’t see why it’s necessary and useful because Frodo isn’t going off on any grand adventures any time soon. Thorin says the boy needs to learn to protect himself, starting now. There’s some yelling and feet stomping and they go off in separate corners to nurse their wounds…

And it is Frodo who makes his wishes known the right way, when Bilbo just asks him,

“Why do you want to learn swordplay, dear boy?”

“Because, Mama!” Frodo claims, “Then one day I can defend Erebor like you did when you helped Papa when he wasn’t feeling well!”

And Bilbo, lo and behold, tears up and finds Thorin later, still misty-eyed.

“Teach him…O-Or have Dwalin teach him…” He whimpers, “Because he really is learning for all the right reasons.”

And Thorin holds him close with a small smile and a kiss to Bilbo’s forehead, apologies made and love stronger than ever.

Of course, Bilbo sits and watches. He has to, he’s the parent after all.

But his heart is a bit lighter and he knows Thorin was right, as was Dwalin; but he was too, there won’t be adventures just yet for his little boy.

Not for many, many years, and even then—he’ll be well ready for them thanks to not just swords, but warmth and love too. 

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Thirdly: Frodo is scared of thunderstorms. Thorin scares them away. Bilbo scares away Thorin's nightmares. Frodo scares away Bilbo's anxiety.


Thorin holds Frodo during those nights when the thunder echoes out in Erebor and when lightning splits the sky; he’ll hum the Misty Mountains song and stroke his curls and tell him the legend that it is Aule up in the sky making the storms, because he is at his forge and creating new life. These stories enthrall the youngling and though he cringes at the noise, Thorin continues to speak, on and on, about beautiful life, about how the rain makes the stones and earth healthier, how Aule works hard to please his beautiful wife Yavanna (‘like how you please Mama?’) and Frodo will fall asleep over time while Thorin rocks him and Bilbo smiles from the doorway.

Bilbo hears and feels every single time Thorin jerks awake after seeing his consort’s blood on his hands, every time he sees him actually dropping him off the mountain or, sometimes, when Smaug kills him along with his nephews. There are tears in his eyes and he clings to Bilbo as the hobbit rubs his back and kisses him softly. He doesn’t tell him any myths or lies, because the nightmares will exist for some time; nor do they make love in the traditional way those nights—instead, he kisses away the tears, and stays up with his husband until he can fall back to sleep. It may not happen until many hours later, but it is always worth it, with Thorin’s head pillowing his shoulder and whispering his love.

And though Thorin sees how life as a consort stresses his husband, and does his best to comfort, it is their ‘son’ that really does it. His gentle smiles and soft questions after each hard meeting make Bilbo smile; he distracts his parent with hand-made toys that Bifur taught him how to make, and dances and songs Bofur sang to him; he—with Bombur—cooks Bilbo’s favorite meals (and Thorin’s too!) and desserts. He distracts him with kind, warm things—reading stories, playing in the garden, and it helps Thorin relax and learn what to do, too. He gives hints to his Papa about where Mama needs a massage or a hug or a tickle-fight—which, Frodo happily joins in. He may be Bilbo’s child, but Frodo is wise—he knows when someone needs a smile and when he needs to be a hero.

And in the end, they all have their own problems, but they make it work.

They’re family, after all.

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Also: Kili and Fili help Frodo learn Khuzdul. They teach him 'papa' 'mama' and 'I am the nephew of the consort! Show some respect, peasant!'

The first two phrases are simply adorable and Bilbo actually fans himself with teary eyes. Granted, ‘mama’ isn’t exactly the title he would have picked, but hey, he’ll take it. It still makes his heart pitter patter and he has those moments.

The last phrase, though, creates a few arguments:


“Oh, really?”

“Yes, darling husband, darling Ghivashel, I-”

“He said that to Dain, you know.”


Thorin sleeps on the couch for a night, Fili and Kili get their ears bopped about half a dozen times, and Frodo learns that he can only say that to Fili and Kili, and not his new family members with power, guards, and long, winding beards.

Though he does say it to Thorin once and Papa just has to let it go because Papa knows when to not start shit…and instead lecture his nephews instead.

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Just a thought: three year old Frodo giving his papa a flower beard.

“Papa, you look best with bluebells!”

“Papa, can I make a daisy-chain in your braids?”


Thorin questions when and how Bilbo taught Frodo all of these different flower types.

He also still claims Frodo’s his biological son because that much cute has to have some Durin blood in it (just look at Kili).

Bilbo just looks on and laughs because the flower-beard-braiding takes hours on end and Thorin just has to sit there in their garden and takes it—but he enjoys it because it makes Frodo smile. And usually Bilbo gets to take the flowers out after supper over warm cider and there’s cuddling after, with Frodo at their feet, playing with toys, or reading his picture books, and they put him to bed and Bilbo puts the flowers in vases.

They end up having lots of vases filled with rainbows of flowers.

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