#don’t have your actors play it gay

[snake-with-scallions]

PSA (because I know we’re all so excited for Nico but this needs to be said): YOU CANNOT PUT NICO’S IDENTITY ONTO THE SMOL BOY WHOS GOING TO PLAY HIM.

IF THE ACTOR TURNS OUT NOT TO BE GAY AS THE YEARS GO BY WE ARE GOING TO LOVE AND RESPECT HIM REGARDLESS!!

IF ANYONE IN THIS FANDOM KIT CONNORS A FRIGGIN TEN YEAR OLD I WILL FIND YOU AND RIP OUT YOUR SPINE!!!!

EVERYONE’S EXCITED FOR OUR GAY DISNEY PRINCE BUT PLEASE REMEMBER THAT THE ACTOR ISN’T NICO, AND WILL HAVE HIS OWN IDENTITY THAT HE NEEDS TO FIND OUT FOR HIMSELF AND NOT SHOVED ON HIM BY A BUNCH OF RANDOM FANS THAT DON’T EVEN KNOW HIM!!!

Please I know everyone is excited but I am so scared for this kid

#pjo #percy jackon and the olympians #nico di angelo #percy jackson #pjo tv series #percy jackson show #I’ll do it #I’m serious #I’m THROWING HANDS with anyone who tries to put Nico’s identity on his baby actor #he might end up being gay but he needs to not be forced into that #please don’t cyber bully the child #I’m literally begging y’all

[katnissgirlsmakedo]

switching gears because i was enjoying my show too much i wanted to save it for tomorrow anyway. how did i watch this fucking movie in the midst of the horrors. looking at this man right now makes me want to kill myself. ok to be fair the horrors were already a time of feeling that emotion so maybe it just didn’t hit me back then in this way but wow. it should be illegal for him to be in movies ever again i don’t want to see him in another movie ever. you did your tv show main role and you played gay that’s the end of your career man. pack it up i’m so serious get off the fuckin tv fr

#this is what i’ll say about kj apa when the time comes as well #‘when the time comes’ meaning after he plays gay of course #your career as an actor isn’t complete until you do that everyone knows this #unfortunately this also means bill hader is one of the most qualified actors of our time. given that the requirements of a complete career #are having a main role in a tv show and playing gay. he’s just killing it out there still. goddamn #anyway. colin morgan you have got to retire. literally go back to ireland. become a baker or something. u don’t need to be in movies anymore #ok well we press on i’m having a horrible night night as well cry about a movie #beth.txt

[gael-garcia]

SAG-AFTRA deal on AI is looking terrible, actually 😬

#SAG Actors, I want to make you aware of some of the language in the #AI portion of the tentative SAG agreement.

Though SAG leadership made much effort to protect members in AI, there are many issues you should look at. I have saved the most serious issue for the end. 1/

If a “digital double” is made of you during a film, they must get your consent and inform you of their intentions for its use, EXCEPT "when the photography or sound track remains substantially as scripted, performed and/or recorded.”2/

This is going to be left up to the studios/streamers’ interpretation. And so, any subtlety regarding how you chose to look or move for the character during the shoot could potentially be changed. Your hair, your clothes, your make-up, etc. 3/

Also, your physical placement in a scene can be changed, like your nearness or distance from another character, or even moving you from the front seat of a car "to the back seat of the car." This suggests not much agency on your part to control your character or performance. 4/

Under “(Digital Double) Use Other Than in the Motion Picture for Which the Performer Was Employed,” it says that "No additional compensation shall be required for use of an Employment-Based Digital Replica that was created in connection with employment of a performer who was… 5/

… employed under Schedule F.” It appears that if you were paid Schedule F for the first film, you don’t get paid for the sequels, where they’re just using your digital double instead of you. I suggest members get sharp clarity on this. 6/

If a “digital double” was made of you in a separate manner (on another film or privately made by you), it's referred to as an “independently created digital replica” (ICDR). There is no minimum compensation listed for studios/streamers to use an ICDR of you in… 7/

… any film they want; only consent. You will apparently need to negotiate any compensation on your own. 8/

Neither consent nor compensation is necessary to use your “digital double” if the project is "comment, criticism, scholarship, satire or parody, a docudrama, or historical or biographical work.” So, you could find yourself in a project you never consented to… 9/

…doing things you never were informed of, for no compensation at all. This is the “First Amendment” argument the #GAI tech companies are fond of trotting out. 10/

Another consent exemption is granted to "adjusting lip and/or other facial or body movement and/or the voice of the performer to a foreign language, or for purposes of changes to dialogue or photography necessary for license or sale to a particular market. 11/

The substitution of swear words is not new, but that your “body movements” would be changed suggests you’ll be used like a type of rag doll in post-production. 12/

There are still a few concerns with the Background Performers’ details, but there’s one that stands out as especially sad. "If the Producer uses a background actor’s Background Actor Digital Replica in the role of a principal performer, the background actor shall be paid… 13/

…the minimum rate for a performer… had (they) performed those scene(s) in person.” So, if an extra is “bumped up” to a principal cast member, they never get to experience that position on a set. But you get a check after the fact. 14/

And the most serious issue of them all is the inclusion in the agreement of “Synthetic Performers,” or “AI Objects,” resembling humans. This gives the studios/streamers a green-light to use human-looking AI Objects instead of hiring a human actor. 15/

It’s one thing to use GAI to make a King Kong or a flying serpent (though this displaces many VFX/CGI artists), it is another thing to have an AI Object play a human character instead of a real actor. To me, this inclusion is an anathema to a union contract at all. 16/

This is akin to SAG giving a thumbs-up for studios/streamers using non-union actors. This would be like the @Teamsters putting in their contract that it’s A-OK for the employer to utilize self-driving trucks instead of them. 17/

@Teamsters I find it baffling that a union representing human actors would give approval of those same actors being replaced by an AI Object. And don’t forget, those AI Objects are a mash-up of all actors' past performances, adding insult to injury. 18/

@Teamsters Bottomline, we are in for a very unpleasant era for actors and crew. The use of “digital doubles” alone will reduce the number of available jobs, because bigger name actors will have the opportunity to double or triple-book themselves on multiple projects at once. 19/

@Teamsters The use of these “digital doubles” will most likely preclude the need of a set or the use of many @IATSE crew and @Teamster drivers. 20/

@Teamsters @IATSE @Teamster Audition odds will change. Winning an audition could become very difficult, because you will not just be competing with the available actors who are your type, but you will now compete with every actor, dead or alive, who has made their “digital double” available for rent … 21/

@Teamsters @IATSE @Teamster … in a range of ages to suit the character. You also will be in competition with an infinite number of AI Objects that the studios/streamers can freely use. And a whole cast of AI Objects instead of human actors eliminates the need for a set or any crew at all. 22/

@Teamsters @IATSE @Teamster You are a complex & remarkable human. Don’t let the CEOs convince you otherwise. Seek out filmmakers & showrunners who value your basic worth & committed to human workers on their projects. These are the ones who will make work that matters. We’re going to be OK. Just hold on. /

#sag aftra #sag aftra strike #ai #sag aftra deal #sag aftra contract #text #post #justin bateman #wtf yall. board too eager to say yes i was wondering why their vote was 86% #who voted against

[fillinforlater]

Loathing Love: Lavish Lies (Part 4)

Male Reader x Kwon Eunbi + Kang Hyewon x Jo Yuri

Length: 9060 words

Tags: emotional drama, smut, cheating, alcohol, rage, anger issues, bisexuality, girl x girl relationship, girl x girl action, threesome, literal breeding, mating press, face sitting, squirting, clit play, dirty talk, the dumbest, most improbable sex ever, this is NOT real life, very dark ending

TW: includes topics like cheating, alcohol, sex and death

Inspiration: "Look at Me" by XXXTENTACION, Hyewon x Yuri best ship, gay power couple; this had to be released in Pride Mont (glad I could make it lol), also @capslocked ; @iznsfw, I'm sorry.

(A/N: THE FINALE of my L4 Series. It's finally here. The promise is fulfilled. I hope you get the ending and don't hate me. It's all fiction.)

“Look at me, fuck on me / Look at me, fuck on me / Look at me, fuck on me.”

Volume decreased by eighty percent. You don’t need someone screaming in your ears right now. It only makes you want to scream back. The poor guy has been dead for almost five years now, he doesn’t really deserve it. If you’re honest to yourself, he feels way too on point. Better turn the radio off entirely.

His voice still resonates in your mind, as you get out of the car. Combined with Hyewon’s and Yuri’s moans, they form an inglorious, deadly symphony to fuel your hatred. Visuals of you screaming, scratching, beating fragile, pale skin pop up in your mind. This wave of emotions, it’s crashing in on you like a tsunami. Sadly, it doesn’t bury you. It only makes you angrier.

Push open the door and Eunbi gasps. She kneels on the living room floor, right next to the carpet. Her clothes are in tatters, her knees covered in bruises, but worst of all, her face is ruined with scratches, blood and runny mascara. It looks like someone already did the things you imagined in your head: beat her up and left her whimpering on the floor. The punishment for someone who cheats and lies.

Grab Eunbi’s lifeless arm and pull it up. Your fiance begins to cry, she begs not with words but with her eyes. The way she shakes her head is in honest fear. The potential strikes scare her, how your palm will meet her face over and over again in a loveless, hurt beating.

But you sigh.

"I can't," you squeeze out, voice cracking with every word. "I hate seeing you like this. You deserve to be thrown out and beg for money on the street. But I can't, I—"

You pull Eunbi into a hug. Her small frame melts into your arms, her feet unable to support her. She is like a wet sack, surprisingly heavy. You're barely able to drag her to the couch and watch her whimper and cry, face hidden behind her elbow.

"I still love you, Eunbi.

"Let's try again."

"Y-yes," she sobs and tightly grabs your shirt.

"Let's marry, Eunbi."

"Y-yes, th-thank you."

#

The proposal might have been a mess, but the marriage was not. Everything was meticulously planned, and even the tiniest details went perfectly. No one knew of Eunbi's affair, and you kept it this way. 

Even after your marriage, your luck did not run out. Everything was working out. Two promotions in a year, a new, bigger house, two cars, a part time job for Eunbi that she really enjoys. Talking about Eunbi, she became attentive, caring, adoring, loving to the point where your wound began to heal.

Eight months into your marriage, you became an actor.

No, not the type that moves to Hollywood, swims in money and earns fame with every new movie. The type who has to act all day every day. You have to pretend that it's all fine, smile at everyone, always say the right things—

Acting is lying. You lie to them, because you cannot live with her lying to you.

Eunbi does not know about the abundance of security cameras you installed around and inside the house. They are tiny, but very modern and always connected to your phone for constant surveillance of your expensive home.

Not a single criminal has tried to enter your home—but multiple other 'criminals' entered something else.

At first, it was one guy. Tall, handsome, expensive suit. Eunbi greeted him with a smile. You watched the footage quite confused. The two of them sat down in the living room and talked for a bit. It looked like he tried to sell her something, but it also looked fake, like they were—

Role playing.

A minute later, Eunbi's arms and feet were wrapped around him as he drilled his cock deep inside her cunt. There was no sound, but you could see her moan and scream as he went faster.

Three weeks later, another guy. He seemed to not like role playing. Eunbi opened the door and his tongue was in her mouth immediately. They fucked all over the kitchen, on every damn counter. At least this guy was somewhat attractive.

Things got horrible after this. Guy after guy walked into your home and fucked your wife. Hole after hole, day after day. Whenever you were at work and she wasn't, a cock was inside her. One time, someone seemed to comment on her hair and the next day she went to dye it blonde. 

That was also the day you decided to not touch her anymore. You stay at work longer, until late at night. Work frees your mind a little, and soon they will promote you to the second highest position. 500k after taxes, seemingly infinite money, yet you still weep and down whiskey each night watching guys go to town on her.

Today, two guys arrived together. They spit roasted her on the bed, which was already covered in her juices and sweat from another guy an hour before. 

The video flashes before your dead eyes. You drop another piece of ice into the glass, watch the auburn whiskey sway and cool. Down it goes as Eunbi gets ready to take a cock up her loose asshole. For the first time, you look at the new guy who groans as Eunbi takes his cock.

His smug grin. It's the same motherfucker, the one you caught with Eunbi a bit over a year ago. 

For the first time, you stop your mindless staring at the screen. You pause the security footage as rage builds up at this stupid expression on this stupid face. Without hesitation, you reach for the glass and repeatedly smash it into the screen. It breaks in violent sparks and the room goes fully dark. 

You tear the screen off the wall, the same way you tear out the self-pity in your sorrow-filled heart. A violent kick sends the monitor into the computer and the thousand dollar set-up is reduced to broken scrap metals and torn wires.

The entire office is suddenly so dark and silent. Not that you were watching with sound, but the vivid pictures produced enough sounds in your head. It's all gone now, together with the dirty light displaying dirty pleasure. 

Don't lie to yourself; this was stupid. But as much as it was stupid, it was also necessary and it felt so right. Even though your favorite whiskey glass fell victim to your rampage, you don't regret it. You need more of this.

Throughout the entire night, you continue to mess up your workplace. You stuff bins and trash cans with everything in your office: Semi-important documents, plants, cables, liquor, chairs and especially all the unnecessary, lavish accessoires you gathered here for some reason. At dawn, the only thing that remains is a table, a chair, a laptop with a charger and a bottle of water. A frugal set-up, but more than enough for your job.

At 6:30 am, you arrive at home and jump right into bed, next to your snoring wife. With a quick glance you check her hand; the ruby embellished gold ring sparkles at her finger. A real, absurdly expensive piece of jewelry on a fake piece of shit, you think but smile nonetheless. There is some irony about it that you can't pin down yet, but you'll look for it a bit more.

#

A knock at your door. 

"Come on in," you say without looking up from your screen. It's probably the intern again, asking for help or another task. To your surprise, it's someone far more important.

"Still feels weird, when you remember what this room used to look like." A man, two decades older than you and a decade more work experience in this company carefully scoots into your office and wanders around it. "It's surprisingly vast."

You close your laptop when the man does not watch. It's out of respect, but for some reason, you do not fear him anymore. His name is Sakimoto, member of the board of directors and chairman of the staff council. Usually, there is only one reason for him to come into your office himself—and it's not a good one.

"How can I help you, Mr. Sakimoto?" you say with an insincere smile.

"Tell me," he responds, eyes wide in either insanity or genuine interest, hard to tell with someone like him. "Why did you throw it all away? It looks like a cell."

"It—to be honest, I—

"Well that's the point. None of the stuff is helpful in any way, even worse, it's distracting, unnecessary bullshit that keeps me from focusing. I don't need it, I don't want it anymore."

Sakimoto nods at your words, his expression never changing, not even at the use of your obscene slip. Maybe being a psychopath is a job requirement for Sakimoto's position. You can't bear to look at his slight smile and wide orbs any longer.

"Intriguing," he finally says and turns towards your door again. "You'll be at the board meeting tonight, 8pm flat."

"Yes, Sir," you calmly say, something grinding on your nerves as Sakimoto leaves without saying goodbye or closing the door. That's it, career over.

#

They’re gonna fire me, fuck.

This thought knocks on your mind the entire day, only getting stronger with every step you take towards the meeting room. Someone must have noticed your indefensible, erratic behavior, but how? Everyone was gone that night like they all are every night. You made sure of it by checking the nearby offices of your subordinates and co-workers. You even made sure to stuff all your furniture and electronics down to the bottom of the waste containers.

Maybe the board had a meeting and someone heard something? Fuck, that can’t be it, can it?

Deep breaths, calm breaths. If they know what happened, your fate is decided. You have enough money anyways. Other companies will still take you. You’re gonna be okay, this is just a small hit, a dent in the fast, unstoppable car that is you. If you’re honest, it’s a lot easier when you don’t care about the passenger or who she is fucking.

Bang the door thrice with confidence. The silence behind it becomes even more quiet, until someone urges you to enter in a strict, booming voice.

“You are a bit early,” the CEO says from the far end of the long table, his back to the setting sun visible through large windows behind him. The other board members look at you, some with a perfect poker face as if they are in serious business talks, others seem amused, maybe even a little tipsy, but what surprises you the most are those who look at you in anger and fear as if you were the grim reaper, coming for their souls.

“Better than being too late,” you respond with charme, your calm heart picking up in pace. 

“That is true!” the vice-CEO shouts and most board members fall into a short fit of laughter. They seem so odd, maybe they are making fun of you before forcing you to sign the resignation. You can already see the stack of paper in the CEO’s hand.

“Enough of this nonsense,” the CEO shouts. The laughs evaporate instantly, yet somehow, the positive vibes remain. The vice-CEO is grinning at you, even the CEO himself cracks a smile. He gets up from his chair, the paper firmly in both of his hands, and walks around the table towards you. Your feet seem to grow roots as he stops before you.

“Congratulations, Mr. Kwon,” he says cheerfully and hands you an—

“Official Invitation to the Board of Directors,” you read out loud in utter disbelief. 

“Mr. Kwon, why do you sound so shocked?” someone in the back asks and the CEO nods towards them with a sly grin.

“I did not inform him about our vote last week. Even Mr. Sakimoto only told him to be here today.

“Mr. Kwon, do you accept our invitation? You will be the thirteenth member, as Mr. Muentrich-Schleuser will resign next month. We all think that you are physically and mentally capable, have the pedigree and skill and most importantly, the outstanding drive to push this company forward. The growth in your department has been unmatched the past few months.”

The smooth, freshly printed piece of paper is in your hand. The other members gradually rise from their seats, all looking at you intently. They seemed so much bigger, when you entered the room, but now they are just like you. All you have to do is take the CEO’s stretched out hand, and you’ll be atop a mountain you never even dreamed of reaching. 

“D-do I have any other choice?” you say cooly, only your stutter betrays your facade. A couple of chuckles, the CEO looks at the ceiling and pretends to think.

“Well, you can’t go back to your apartment, as your successor has already been chosen. You could be transferred to Japan and lead the department there. It’d be the same pay as here but—”

He leans closer to whisper.

“—you’d have to pay more taxes there.

“What will it be, Mr. Kwon?”

#

You find yourself on the road again. Somehow, fate has you connected to your car. Whenever something big happened or is about to happen, you find yourself sitting in it, music blasting loud and numbing everything out. Tonight however, you purposefully turn the radio off and drive carefully. 

Let me celebrate somewhere; but where?

You won’t go home to your wife of course. She is more than undeserving to celebrate this moment with you. Most of your other friends and relatives are either asleep already or would ask stupid questions about Eunbi and why she isn’t celebrating alongside you. No, you need someone to not ask you about anything and just parties the night away.

Ah fuck it; strangers will do.

Park your car at the side of the road, don’t care for a ticket, hell, don’t give a fuck if someone decides to steal it. It’s used and you can easily buy a new one tomorrow if you want to. You wander down the street, busy with party-goers, drunk, high or both, some are a lot more focused and carry their drunk, high or both friends home. You loosen your tie, no need to look formally if everyone around you doesn’t either.

Suddenly, a familiar sight, a wooden structure with warm lights and that unmistakable smell. It’s almost nostalgic, magnetic, unavoidable, you just have to walk in there. As you grab the handle of the door and see the long, smooth, wooden counter, it hits you.

Oh my God.

“Oh, wow, haven’t seen you here in forever,” the bartender says when he sees you. His face hasn’t changed, his smile is the same, but you need a few moments to really recognize him again.

He takes a step back and smirks, firm grasp on a bottle of tequila.

“Well, yes, it has,” you respond and walk up to him. “It has easily been a year since my last visit, how the fuck do you remember me?”

“I have this tendency to remember people, especially because you were the last man to ever take her backstage.”

He winks and you throw your head back. Time flies, it really does, yet you find yourself sitting on the exact same stool on a very similar night with the same bartender. Even your wife is still a whore, fucking the same guys, probably right now as well. 

“So I take it that Hyewon is not coming here anymore?” you sigh and point at an expensive bottle of wine. The bartender swiftly uncorks it.

“I did not say that. She is just a lot more, let’s call it, picky. Okay, you know what?”

With an elegant pour he fills you a glass and places the dark ruby liquid on the counter before continuing.

“You can ask her yourself. She’ll be on stage in a couple minutes.”

A waft of wine hits your nostrils, but it’s a lot weaker than the words coming from his mouth. The thought of Hyewon blows you away, stronger than any liquor, no matter how high the amount of alcohol or the years it has matured. Hyewon, the kind stranger, the hot stranger, the stranger to fuck your stress out. Hyewon, the crazy friend, the bisexual friend, the let's-have-a-bar-backstage- threesome-with-this-hot-singer-friend. She was a big reason why you got over Eunbi cheating on you—but it has sadly not led you to the brightest of futures.

Maybe I should have stayed with her.

Take a sip of the wine. It’s delicious, celebratory, a drink for victors who have gained status and wealth beyond imagination, and you are now part of that group. At least you feel like it, even as the bar gets flooded with more and more people from all walks of life. Some look as well-dressed as you are, others clearly struggle to make ends meet in some months, but they're all here for the same thing.

Wait, what is Hyewon going to do on stage? Is she going to sing?

As you still wonder and savor the wine, one of the waitresses moves from light switch to light switch and slowly but surely fills the room in darkness. The crowd goes quiet as tension rises. Everyone is excited for sure, but none of them reach the level of thrill you feel when the spotlight illuminates the stage and a beautifully dressed woman appears behind the curtain.

Resounding cheers, applause, the occasional toast around you, inside you, but all you can do is watch in awe. Hyewon looks angelic, on one hand illegally beautiful, on the other illegally hot. Something about her is distant yet warm, unreachable yet magnetic, strangulating for the heart yet easy for the lunges—she is oxygen, or even better—the breathable air of heaven.

Hyewon.

Confidence in her stance which silences the crowd again, confidence in her hands which raise the mic to her glossy lips, most importantly, confidence in her voice as she starts the song with a powerful low note that almost throws you off the stool. 

It shouldn’t be such a shock. Hyewon’s voice is mesmerizing, you should have noticed it when she spoke to you or at least when she moaned, but only now you see the full beauty of it. It’s befitting of her, and you will enjoy every second of it. She carries this song gracefully, giving it a special touch that will keep the listeners yearning for a studio version, which would be an efficient side hustle for her.

Wait, what if Hyewon becomes a musician, with songs on the radio and the first glimmers of fame? What if she is already quite popular, an underground artist on the rise, from covering songs to writing her own? What if there is a whole story happening in her life that you missed entirely, just because you stuck to your whore-wife and mind-numbing job? This fear of having missed out on something this big and beautiful, maybe even life itself, shakes your heart with a strong aching, until—

Another voice. The first verse, the pre-chorus, the build-up, it all leads to another voice coming in with unbridled power and passion. It cannot be contained in the way it booms through the speakers and puts goosebumps on every single person in this room. You’re included in this list, but when you recognize the voice and see the woman step out on stage, those goosebumps turn to a full-on rush of nostalgic emotions. 

Back then, her singing was the catalyst for an unforgettable night. Unexpectedly wild, a lot of fun, but the stinging arrow of envy made things bitter-sweet for you. Watching the two of them be so close, intimate and loving had you yearning for more than just enraged sex. You wanted this too, and there was a time where Eunbi provided it. But the veil has been lifted. There is no love, just despair.

Yuri.

It’s certainly a touching thing, seeing that Hyewon and Yuri are still close friends, connected through the language of music. Apparently they were always here, right in this inconspicuous bar, pulling the stress out of people with nothing but their voices, which combine at the end of the second verse and rush ahead into the chorus. It’s an invasion of your ears, low and high, soft and powerful, caring and overwhelming. 

This performance is greatness, the best of what humanity has to offer—and you feel like the embodiment of an embittered, wasted life.

#

Yuri hits the final note with such perfection that the first few people have already jumped up from their seats and cheered without holding back. Thunderous applause is an understatement to how hard everyone claps their hands or stomps the ground. They’re shaking the entire bar, which has the bartender holding onto some of the bottles with a worried smile. You on the other hand are glued to your seat in deep regret. Not enough to make you cry, but enough to keep you from giving the two angels what they deserve. 

Take a look at your wine. It has been untouched in your glass for a while now and it’d be a waste to throw it away just because you’re facing the cold, harsh truth again. What even is true at this point? Not the stuff you promise your customers and certainly not your relationship. Fuck it, take a large sip.

“They are awesome,” the bartender gasps. “They should finally do this professionally, this stage is too small for them.”

“Yeah,” you answer with a weak smile. “Imagine an entire stadium full of people being this ecstatic. The world would hear it.”

“Well, I tried my best convincing them,” he says and looks right next to you with a sly grin. “Maybe you have more success than I did.”

Time freezes when you feel the familiar busty body around your own. You did not see Hyewon launching herself at you, don't realize what's happening until she starts talking.

"Oh my God, it has been so long! Wait, is it really you?"

"Hyewon, I, uhm, yeah. I'm me."

"It's so crazy to see you again! How are you, how is life?"

"Well, it's—"

Hyewon squeezes your body tighter. She pouts when you look down at her until you finally get it. Return the embrace and Hyewon squeals in happiness.

"You don't have to say anything," she coos softly. "I'm just happy to see you again."

"Likewise," you respond with a sigh.

You could stand around like this for eternity. Hyewon's deep breaths and her steadily decreasing heart rate start to heal you from within. The pain and suffering caused by Eunbi's constant cheating, it doesn't matter right now. You deserve a break from the mess that is your life—you feel like you can celebrate your promotion for real now.

"Hyewon, I—no, you. You were wonderful on stage. Your singing, it blew me away."

As you gush about her performance, Hyewon blushes and disconnects the hug. You notice that she has this heavenly aura around her, like she is spraying sparks of love and happiness that try to ignite everyone around her. No wonder that she had this excellent stage presence during her duet.

"Thank you so much—

"Oh, babe~ I'm here~"

You jump at Hyewon's sudden call, which is not directed at you of course. Before your eyes can search for the person Hyewon just called babe, they have already arrived. Delicate fingers entwined with Hyewon's, they both go for a quick peck on the lips.

"Yu-Yuri?" 

Your shriek makes the duo—the couple?—look at you with wide eyes, glossy and full of love for life—for each other? There is still too much to process for your brain, it can't handle another input. 

"Hey, is everything alright?" Yuri asks with concern in her voice and a caring hand on your elbow.

"Ye-yeah, ju-just not up to date at all. Are you two like… a thing?"

Hyewon has this bright smile on her face. She wraps an arm around Yuri's hip and the younger girl leans her head on her collarbone. Yuri raises a hand up to your face. There is a simple silver ring on it, and you see her eyes scintillate when she shows you it.

"We married two months ago," Hyewon giggles. "So much has happened since we met last time. I can’t really sum it up."

"Don't feel forced to explain yourself," you respond with an awkward laugh. "We had a short stint a while back, I only saw you falling for each other—

beyond that, our lives have happened far apart. But not going to lie, I'd love to hear your story if you're down for it."

Hyewon and Yuri share a glance and then start to laugh for seemingly no reason. It turns into a full fit that suddenly has you in a tight, three way hug. 

"We'd love to," Yuri says when she catches her breath again. "After all, you somewhat got us together. I told Hye that we should try to invite you to the marriage."

"Nah, it's good. How about I pay for the first round of drinks because of your amazing performance and then for the second round 'cuz I got a big promotion today."

"What if I want a third round though?" Hyewon asks jokingly.

"Babe, you can never handle three rounds," Yuri responds with sass and pulls the two of you to a nearby table.

"Looks like you just qualified yourself to pay for the third round then, Yuri."

#

"Like I said," Yuri babbles, her pitch high as the love story reaches its conclusion. "Hye was so scared to tell her father, but I had already bought the rings and planned the dresses, the cake—her mom was literally involved in everything—so on a Saturday night I poured her a third tequila shot—look how done she is after only two!"

Yuri points at her wife, whose head rests on her shoulder with heavy eyes and a rosy hue on her cheeks. Hyewon is in a drunk-dazed heaven, smiling stupidly, while trying to disagree with sounds that almost sound like words.

"Anyways, she was loose and so I dragged her over, we told him and—it was a stressful minute, I tell you that—after a minute he hugged us wordlessly. We kinda had no idea what it meant but during the wedding he looked happy, at peace basically."

"Okay, wow that is—"

Even your tenth reaction to Hyewon and Yuri's story, from threesome over dating to coming out to marriage, is cut short, this time by Hyewon groaning out a functioning sentence from her lip stick and alcohol covered lips.

"Babe, you, you forgot the part where, when you had to quit your job then."

"Oh, I'd love to hear about that too!" you quickly add, reminiscing about their amazing vocal performance. "Why did you decide to only sing for a living?"

Yuri puts on a sad smile as she strokes Hyewon's hair. Her gaze rests upon her empty glass, her orbs turn glassy for a moment then she shakes her head as if to shrug off what's bothering her.

"That's just about, you know, my former job. When I quit because we wanted to focus on music, some were angry because they thought I abandoned the team for childish dreams while others were… not so supportive of us. Ah, just forget it, it's fine."

"Sorry you had to go through it and sorry for bringing it up," you quickly apologize.

"Jeez, I said it's fine, don—"

"Let me make it up to you with a third round and the promise to meet the two of you here again."

Raise your hand to call the waiter while Yuri searches for something in Hyewon's pocket, but the older keeps nuzzling closer and closer as she dozes off. When the drinks arrive, Yuri slips you a phone.

"Put in your numbern" she whispers. "I bet she'll want to hear more from you too."

"Thank you. I assume you don't want to hear from me then?" you chuckle.

"That's right!" Yuri shouts and lifts her glass on high, so the entire bar can hear her. "I'm only here for the drinks. Cheers!"

#

Even the greatest party needs to come to an end at some point. 3am is when you pay for the drinks and call a cab. You barely find your way up the drive way into your house, which is not that bad, because now you don’t need to go sleep in the same bed as Eunbi and instead have the couch for you alone. It has never been so cozy.

Speaking of Eunbi, her acting is almost great. She apparently was so worried about you last night, and all the other nights the last couple of months. Now she found you on the couch, an obvious hangover by the way you scrunch your forehead. She puts her hand on your shoulder, rubbing it in circles, playing the worried wife like it’s in her script. 

“No, this looks wrong, I swear,” you try to laugh it off but Eunbi is just getting closer. God, you can smell all the other people on her. It’s like she showered in a dozen different men’s perfume and deodorant just to taunt you. Ignore the mocking, you’re above this. 

“Then what is it supposed to look like, babe?” Eunbi asks, her eyes wide and shimmering. “I’m willing to believe you, but you have to tell me why you got so wasted.”

“Well, I…” 

It’s best to mix the lie with some truth to the point where you might believe it yourself.

“I, surprisingly, got a great promotion, and we went out partying for a long ti—”

“Oh my God, babe, that’s awesome!”

Out of nowhere, Eunbi casts aside all her concern and launches herself atop of you. You immediately tense up. Feeling the incredible curves of her body has never felt so wrong, so traumatic. Groan and put a palm to your temple to signal her your distress, but she continues to bounce on your lap. 

“All your heart work paid off, I’m so proud!” she shouts gleefully, her arms tight around your throat in what looks like a loving embrace but feels a lot more like someone strangling you. “I almost thought you were out there getting addicted to whiskey every night.”

And you are addicted to men, Eunbi.

Addicted to sex, to being unloyal, to being creamed by other men.

You are the addict, you heartbreaking bitch.

But the words don’t come out. They run circles in your head while Eunbi’s clothed entrance rubs circles over your not-growing, not-aroused dick. You’re not going to surrender to her fuckable body, instead gently pushing her sides and groaning unduly. 

“Yeah, no, this was a one time thing. I should sober up, my head fucking hurts.”

“Should I get you some water and painkillers?” Eunbi asks and gets off of your lap to jog to the kitchen.

“Yes, please—”

—and then get out of my life.

#

The following months brought some drastic changes. Not only is your work harder, it’s also not optional anymore. You started to put up better numbers because of your overtime work, which was due to Eunbi. Now, you can’t escape it anymore. Working from 6am to 10pm is normal, hell, on some days you wish you could sleep three hours. 

But everytime you look at your new bank account—can’t let Eunbi have all the access—it all seems worth it. The pay is ungodly, you have way too much money. Even after taxes and buying two new cars to not look ‘broke’ next to all the other board members, you still have no clue what to do with all of it. Two or three more years, and you could retire wealthy beyond belief. Begs the question why these people usually don’t and continue working.

Another change to your life comes through Hyewon and Yuri. By themselves, they installed a new social life in your life. At least two times per month, the three of you meet up in a bar. You get to know new people, entirely different from you, but also basically the same. Everyone is tired from work, so it’s time to drink and party. You almost forgot how good it feels to have a variety of friends—from those that are perfect for loose parties to those that deeply care about you. 

Hyewon is the best of those friends. Nothing about your brief yet intense past seems to stick on her. She is chill around you, goofy and not at all awkward. Yuri is quite similar, though a bit more extravagant and flamboyant, which makes them the absolute gay-power couple. They just click, it’s perfect, young love. 

“Reminds me of myself.” Your lips betray you.

“What?” Hyewon shouts back, over the obnoxiously loud bass of the rock band on stage.

“Ah, nothing. Just a little envious~” you respond with fake annoyance and raise your glass for a toast. Hyewon hesitates, very out of character.

“Nah, I’m not toasting your glass before you tell me what you mean,” Hyewon says and stares into your soul with her drunk, teary eyes. Maybe she is not that drunk? Maybe you can finally open up about it?

“Really, it’s nothing.”

“Nuh-uh, tell me outside.”

And with that, Hyewon walks out the front door, you in tow as your tie becomes completely undone and your shirt is a mess. Outside you do not find privacy, just a lot of strangers talking, laughing, smoking. This time you pull Hyewon further down the street next to your parked Porsche, where it’s less likely for someone to hear you.

“Now you gotta… tell me,” Hyewon babbles.

“You are drunk, you’re not gonna remember it anyways.”

“Nuh-uh,” she says again, hitting your chest with her long, painted nails. “You need to spill it now, I’ll remember. Like I remember you only asking about me and Yuri and never talking about yourself.”

She’s spot on. You never wanted to talk about it. Eunbi’s name is pain, you don’t need to make the newfound pleasure and joy in your life go away because of her. This cheating whore—she should just go away at this point.

“You remember why we met?” you carefully ask Hyewon, testing if she is capable of understanding even though she is under heavy influence.

“Yes, your girl cheated on you.”

“Guess what: I married that girl.”

“Oh,” Hyewon says and after some delay smiles brightly. “So you talked it out and things got better? That’s why you didn’t come back, right?”

“Let’s just say that,” you gulp and your hands form fists. “Some people don’t change.”

“Fuck,” Hyewon’s pointy heels hit the sidewalk hard. “I’m sorry about that. Was it a bad divorce?”

“Huh? She still lives with you? In the same house? You share the same bed?”

“I—I did not divorce her.”

“I-I did not say that!”

“But it’s true!” Hyewon steps closer and grabs your collar. “I can see it in your eyes, you can’t let go. You hate her, but you can’t throw her away, although she deserves it.”

You want to grab Hyewon’s wrist, push her to the side and run away shouting words of denial that you are stronger than this, that she is wrong, that she doesn’t get it. However, Hyewon doesn’t deserve it—even worse, she is absolutely right.

“Yes,” you whisper.

“Yes,” she whispers and lets go. The two of you lean onto the Porsche in silence, watching customers of the bar pass by without worries, without hate, without defeat. The liquor has done wonders, turning a negative week positive. The same can’t be said about you. You feel exposed, utterly defeated by Hyewon’s words. 

“Fuck you,” you groan, face hidden in hands. “Fuck you for being right, Hyewon.”

“Sorry, but you had to hear it,” she responds and pats your back. “You need to tear her out of your life, like a terribly written chapter in a book or like awful lyrics that you wrote while high on midnight wine and sex.

“You get me?”

“I think.”

“Good.”

The world might not be good at this moment, yet Hyewon’s reassurance, her slow pats on your shoulder, her strong posture in her stunning red dress and the loving, tipsy smile on her beaming face are enough to show you the light of a better world.

“What about you?” you suddenly ask, wiping away tears you did not weep. “Something you’re hiding or keeping down?”

Hyewon looks away, her smile filling with a hint of agony, though nothing of her stunning beauty fades.

“You got me there. It’s something that’s been bugging me for maybe half a year. I know I shouldn’t but—I can’t get away from the thought, you know?”

“I would know if you would tell me,” you say playfully. Now it’s your turn to massage her shoulder, give reassurance, though you don’t know if you have any.

“It’s just that I—

“I want to have a child—my child. I love Yuri more than anything, I will never regret choosing her and only her, but this longing… it does not go away.”

“And adopting is not an option? S-sorry if that was insensitive…”

“No, it’s fine. I just want to be pregnant and raise my child together with her. You know what, forget that. It has to remain a dream.”

Suddenly, a friend of both you and Hyewon sprints out of the bar and looks around in dramatic panic until he finds the two of you. He takes leaps towards you, almost lands face first on the concrete before catching his small frame and coming to a halt.

“Hyewon,” he gasps out in between huffs and puffs. “Yuri is—she is so full, completely—you know?”

“That girl,” Hyewon sighs.

#

You return home on the same night. Your chat with Hyewon sucked out all the power the liquor usually has over you. It means that you are able to think about her words and take her seriously, but you’ll also have to live with Eunbi laying next to you, smelling like foreign sweat and cum again. You could choose the couch, but you haven’t gotten around to having it replaced with a couch where it’s better to sleep on. 

The moment you open the main door, you hear screams coming from the bedroom. Deja Vu, not the subtle kind, more like a fucking train running you over. You still remember the one time she did it almost two years ago where you caught her. This is basically the same. The same sounds, the same gut wrenching punch to your gut, hell, even the groans by the guy sound the same—

Could it be?

Eunbi, in her brand new bikini, rides the same fucking guy from back then while he has his disgusting, greedy hands all over her skin, spanking it and making her scream even louder. 

Like a silent assassin, you sneak towards the slightly ajar bedroom door. Dimmed lights illuminate the room which is filled by the smell of sex and the repetitive sounds of skin on skin. You take out your phone and use it as a mirror to catch a glimpse of what’s happening.

“You like that, you whore?” he growls at her, smiling stupidly dazed.

“Yes, oh God! Hit my tits!”

“I swear to God, your husband must be such a faggot for not immediately fucking you in that outfit. You look like a fucking breeding cow!”

“Yes, I’m cumming!”

“He can’t make you cum!”

The guy squeezes, then twists Eunbi’s breasts as she trembles, screams and squirts to an absolutely ridiculous level, one that even pornography can ot reach. She lets herself fall forward and the guy finishes inside her after a couple of thrusts. His rancid cum leaks out from every corner of Eunbi’s loose pussy. 

You almost throw up. You hurry towards the front door and hide in the back of your car. There is rage, embarrassment, pain—you can’t confront her, hell, you can’t even confront him when he leaves the house like a king, the sun slowly rising in the background. 

Your mind is empty, empty to the point it’s completely clear. You wait for Eunbi to fall asleep, then collect all the camera’s you have installed and throw them in a public trash bin. Afterwards, you clean up the house, dusting off as quietly as possible while also collecting dirty clothes to wash them (there is fucking leftover cum on some of her clothes and towels).

Lastly, you lay down next to her for a second and check if she has cleaned herself properly. 

This fucking whore, I—

“Honey, sorry for not making it last night,” you shout, pretending to come home at 5am. Eunbi shrieks and shoots up, still dressed in the brown bikini, still cum oozing from her cunt. She tries to hide herself underneath a blanket.

“Ba-babe, tha-that’s totally fine,” she responds nervously, looking very puzzled because of your tired yet bright smile.

“I saw you cleaned the house, it looks wonderful!” you compliment her.

“I, uhm.”

“Hey, even the washing machine is running—and did you bring out the trash already?”

“Well, I—”

“God, you look so hot in that bikini,” you lean down to her and cup her bountiful breasts. “I could devour you right now. Did you really wear it just for me?”

“I—

Eunbi hesitates, turns away for a second to look out of the window. She is thinking about it, clearly. This is where her final redemption can start, the way to salvation is to reveal all of her sin, the only way she can come back is to…

“I’m glad you noticed, babe,” she says with the fakest of smiles. “And yes, I would only wear this for you. B-but I’m not feeling it right now, you understand?”

You nod.

“I love you, Eunbi.”

You lying devil.

#

How did you end up here?

“Are you sure about this, Yuri?”

“Yes, do you really want this, babe?”

Yuri folds her arms and raises both her eyebrows.

“How many times do I have to tell you? Yes, I want this!”

With all doubts seemingly out of the way, the three of you make your way to the bedroom. Hyewon’s and Yuri’s apartment is small, but very cozy, the perfect place to live a relaxed, problem free life. 

But they decided to get you involved. You’re a problem here. Sure, you might have helped at starting their relationship in the first place, but now you’re here for chaos. 

Hyewon sinks onto the sheets first, Yuri’s fingers entangled with hers. Your fingers find the hem of Hyewon’s short dress. The angelic garment feels incredible, pure even in your hand and so you only hike it up with care, deeply in awe of what you’re about to see.

Meanwhile, Hyewon is a lot less pedantic and awestruck. She yanks Yuri closer, shortly fiddles with the button of her jeans and then quickly starts to undress her wife. The denim is quickly gone and before Hyewon can attack the white lace panties, Yuri shoves her lover's face into them. 

“Use your precious tongue, honey~”

Oops, you almost started to stare for too long. Better continue your hike up Hyewon’s beautiful, bountiful legs to her holy sanctuary, covered by the same lace she so greedily licks and nibbles on. Your digits hook into the white fabric and slowly pull it down, making Hyewon melt further into Yuri’s pussy. 

“You’re getting so excited, huh~?” Yuri teases and pats Hyewon’s head. The older girl nods while you start to fold her dress to finally see her wet, shaven cunt. You can smell the excitement, the arousal, the anticipation of what is about to happen to her. Now you consider yourself lucky to not have slept with anyone, which potentially avoided any and all STDs. 

It lets you create trouble.

#

How did you end up here?

It’s two days after Hyewon officially asked you to impregnate her. Tomorrow she will ask her wife in what you can only imagine will be the most stressful talk in her entire life. Today however, is not tomorrow. Today is the day you got your STD test back. Hyewon wanted you to take it for if things go her way and Yuri actually agrees to this chaotic proposal.

To no surprise, the results are negative. After all, you haven’t touched Eunbi in forever and by the way she lets seemingly everyone cum inside her, you wouldn’t be surprised if she caught anything. In the end, that was not enough however. You needed to make sure.

A bottle of champagne, neatly placed on the living room table. You put some decorations around it. Eunbi will appear here any minute, you told her you have a surprise waiting, something that will make her speechless, breathless even. 

“Hey, honey,” Eunbi announces her return, grocery bags in hands. “What is it you wanted to tell me?”

“Eunbi, I—the reason why I even took a day off is—nah, come on over! Let’s raise a glass first, shall we!”

The glasses are already filled, well prepared. Eunbi seems utterly perplexed. “Champagne in the middle of the day? Honey, what are you planning~?”

Trouble, bitch.

#

“Oh, yes, eat me, Hye, eat me.”

Yuri has started to tear off her t-shirt, the top underneath as well, to sit on Hyewon’s face completely naked. You on the other hand have only fished out your hard cock, which the incredible display of passion and erotic has surely made harder than ever. The straps of Hyewon’s dress have also started to fall down her shoulders. Finally, the chaos is coming together.

“The two of you are so hot,” you compliment and lean towards them. 

“I know,” Yuri responds in between moans and grinds her soaking pussy more and more on Hyewon’s mouth. “Your mouth is so pretty, so go-good.”

“Hyewon, are you ready?” you ask the woman below you, her nipples peeking out from her dress, her legs spread wide and invitingly and her pussy twitching when you rub up and down her labia. 

Hyewon finds her way out from in between Yuri’s thighs and rests her head back against her lover’s tight stomach. Deep breaths and eyes of absolute need signal you that yes, she is more than ready. The same goes for Yuri, who is on the one hand very fixated on rubbing and drooling all over Hyewon’s collarbone, while her eyes are focused on your cock.

“Watch him closely,” Yuri whispers. “He is going to give you our child.”

With that, you push inside of Hyewon’s awaiting pussy.

#

“What are we celebrating? Did you get another promotion?”

Eunbi looks genuinely curious. Strange, she hasn’t asked about your work at any previous point in time, unless it was about when you would be home. Keep the sarcasm to yourself, you don't want to spoil the actual surprise.

"Oh, sweety," you laugh with full bass. "No more promotions needed, we are set for life. Which is why I bought a new house!"

"No, you didn't!" Eunbi shouts and almost drops the glass.

"Careful, careful, don't spill it."

"Oh my God, you are crazy. Where is this house? Still in Korea or…"

You raise your glass towards her and smirk.

"I'll only tell you if you would do me the honor."

Eunbi reciprocates the smirk.

"Of course, darling."

The two of you set the glasses to your lips. Your eyes are wide open, your heart beats in an uncontrollable flurry as you watch Eunbi down the champagne quickly, almost in one go. You're quick to follow, while a new wind of fresh air fills your nostrils.

This should not feel this good.

#

"Ah!"

Hyewon screeches when you pierce her tight pussy open. She clings onto her wife's thighs, gripping them tightly while blurting her initial, high-pitched moans straight into the pussy above her.

"You take it so well, baby," Yuri groans and rubs Hyewon's breasts with the sweaty palms of her hands. "Squeeze him dry."

Place both hands on Hyewon’s hips and begin to slowly pump into the woman, your cock stretching her walls, filling her whole. When Yuri suddenly starts to play with the small, hidden clit above the entrance, Hyewon becomes noticebly wetter, to the point where you hear the wet sounds of her arousal. It spreads around her crotch, your crotch, her legs, your legs, the bed’s legs, until everything is a glorious mess.

“Oh, I can feel him inside you, baby,” Yuri husks as her hand roams Hyewon’s abdomen. She has gotten off her lover's face and is now gazing at it, her eyes lustful, demanding for Hyewon to be bred. “Soon, I’ll feel something else knock from inside.”

“Yu-Yuri, I’m getting close!” Hyewon screeches, her fingers wrapping around your wrists as you grip her pale body tighter and tighter as she gets tighter and tighter. “I’m about to—”

“Don’t hold back,” Yuri demands and her hand slips down to Hyewon’s clit again and rubs furiously. “I want to see you cum, cum as you finally receive this gift.”

Well, there goes the last shadow of a doubt that Yuri might have something against this crazy idea. Turns out she is even more insane than you or Hyewon. She gets off on you pounding, dominating her wife and she does the same, finally choking Hyewon’s throat gently while bringing her to a loud, splashing orgasm. From the corner of her eye, you see her urging you to not cum yet. 

If she just knew how hard this is with Hyewon wringing all over your lubricated, diamond-like cock. Her pussy sucks you in, takes your breath away, yet you are able to make Yuri’s wish come true. Just close your eyes and imagine something normal is happening, a walk in the park, a nice summer breeze, the beautiful green of the leaves—

“You are so hot, baby, eat me~”

Yuri climbs on top of Hyewon’s face again, her subtle ass turned towards you as she slams her pussy on Hyewon’s panting mouth and rubs herself all over the most flushed, most perfect features to ever graze the earth. Hyewon is barely able to stick out her tongue to tickle Yuri’s clit and it’s so endearing, you just have to make it more difficult for her.

Fold Hyewon. It's as easy as folding a piece of paper. Hyewon’s feet dangle in the air, her toes curl frantically, trying to reach the ceiling to find grip, but she is helpless. At first she lost control over her body due to the mind-blowing orgasm, now it’s because Yuri and you use her as you please. Hyewon is a tool for pleasure and she couldn’t feel more pleasure.

“Your tongue, baby, put it in—ah!” Yuri’s climax was predictable. Her small frame trembles throughout, her adorable butt is right in front of you. You take a risk and fold Hyewon further, your lips now right on Yuri’s cheek. Your lick right across it. “N-not you! B-but don’t stop now!”

So you continue. Your tongue travels all over Yuri’s cheeks, an adventure almost as good as the adventure your cock takes inside Hyewon, exploring every single place inside her scorching cunt. You eventually end up in Yuri’s butt, twirling your tongue, getting her addictive taste on your tastebuds. Sadly, you’re unable to go all out on Hyewon in the meantime, so she scrapes your shoulders, probably feeling neglected. When you look down however, she opens her mouth wide and begs in the most adorable, lewd voice:

“Share?”

You drool right into the awaiting Hyewon, transferring the taste of her wife’s asshole, but it’s not enough, you need to dive into her lips and force her tongue around in her mouth. There is no other option, you need to melt into Hyewon to give her the perfect child, a child conceived under the most ridiculous, feverish and unexplainable circumstances possible.

Yuri’s nails dig in your neck.

“Enough fun. Give her your fucking cum!”

Open your eyes a final time to find Hyewon, fucked silly, sweat, tears, girl cum all over her face and hair, eyes barely open, mouth barely closed—why is she more perfect, the messier she gets? You thrust deeply a couple of times and with a final sprint, you finish the race, with Hyewon bred and Yuri rubbing her clit in a daze. 

“Don’t pull out yet,” she babbles. “I need to—fuck—I need to get the plug first.”

#

“It needs to look like champagne, untraceable, no weird smells or anything.

“Yes, I know that that is fucking elaborate and costly, I don’t care.

“Do you want to be on the board or not? I thought so.

“We have a deal then.

“Hm? No, her death does not need to be quick.”

Infact, I want it to be as long and painful as possible.

# 20 years later #

You open the window and watch the wind splash water against the shore of Malta. This view alone is worth thirty million euros apparently—you’re inclined to agree. The blue of the ocean meets the white stones, it’s a perfect match. No matter how rough the wind comes and goes, no matter how high the sea levels may rise, these two will never betray each other.

A knock on your front door. The way she knocks is unmistakable. Ever since moving to this long forgotten, barely reachable island, you have never felt the need to hurry about anything. It’s all calm and quiet out here—you’d need to go back to Korea for your life to be busy again. But if you’d go back again, your need to see her would be too big.

You couldn’t do that to her mothers.

“Hello, dear Godfather,” the beautiful girl says with a smile and playfully bows her head.

“Hello, dear Godchild,” you return the smile and the bow. “Didn’t your mother teach you how to properly bow?”

“Which one?” she asks, not able to contain her laughter. “The one that sings or the one that sings?”

“It’s nice to see you again, Minju.”

I missed you, my daughter.

(A/N: I hope you all had a happy june/Pride month!)

#kpop smut #male reader insert #female idol smut #izone smut #girl group smut #male reader #male reader smut #hyewon smut #yuri smut #eunbi smut

[rainbowsky]

Hi rainbowsky! I'm a new-ish (autumn 2023) Yizhan fan - it's been so much fun to explore and read everything available, your blog included! I really enjoy your opinions and insights. I have a question and a request. Question: When CQL first started airing, what were people saying about the relationship between WWX and LZ in the show, and about the actors playing them? Did the CP start right away? Request: Then later on, when the BTS started appearing (when was that - after the show finished airing, right?), what were people saying about the real interactions between the two actors? Were people shocked? Amazed? Even more curious? I can imagine social media was on fire! But I'd like to hear from someone who "lived" through it in real time. Please give me a description of what it was like - especially what your thoughts and feeling were as you saw it happening. I wish I could have been there! Thank you!

Hi Blbrave! Thanks so much, I'm glad you're enjoying my blog!

This is all a very, very long time ago, but I'll do my best to share what I can remember.

Actually, the CP started before the show began airing. The supertopics were opened during filming in 2018. I think this was inevitable, given that the series is based on a BL story. Of course fans of the novel will go into all of this with an eye toward the two characters and, by extension, GG and DD.

Similarly, as the show was airing of course there were a large number of viewers who knew it was a BL and viewed it as a BL at that time, even though it was being billed as a martial brotherhood series. There was a lot of analysis from fans trying to spot various ways that the production team managed to get around censorship and signal the queer romance between WWX and LWJ.

Others have done far better, more comprehensive analysis of all that than I could ever do, but it's so long ago I don't know where those posts might have gone. Some of this was discussed in my post about queerbaiting, so you can look there for more info.

As I said in that post, one of their smartest ways of highlighting the queer relationship was to downplay romance between the straight characters. We never see a straight couple doing something that we don’t also see LWJ and WWX doing. The wedding happens off camera, yet we see LWJ and WWX do their bows on camera. There’s never a kiss or any kind of PDA between straight characters, yet we see LWJ and WWX in each other’s arms throughout the series.

We got a gay kiss:

We got gay sex:

There was also the headband repeatedly being described as the domain of only family and spouses, and the various ways they connected it with WWX. WWX grabbing it when he was possessing the paperman, and also at one point being tied to LWJ by the wrist with the headband - all of this signalling that WWX was a spousal figure for LWJ.

There was the drunk scene with LWJ giving WWX chickens (a wedding tradition in China).

And many more examples I won't get into.

There were many of those types of things in the series, and they were discussed enthusiastically at the time. However, I don't think there were many bystanders who made those connections. It was primarily fans of the books/show (i.e. those who appreciated it as a BL story and not as a bromance/friendship story) who saw and discussed those hints.

I know the idea that anyone could be so oblivious to the gay subtext throughout the story that they miss the queerness entirely is hard to get one's head around, but straight viewers usually just see WWX and LWJ as best friends and sworn martial brothers. The show could never have been made or aired if that wasn't the case.

In fact, newer fans might not be aware that there was a lot of controversy during filming because of leaked early attempts to create a straight romance between Wei Wuxian and Wen Qing. Some relationship-building scenes between them were filmed, and at one point in the BTS GG is heard complaining about the straight romance and saying that all those scenes should be deleted.

In the production team's defense, there was doubt at the time about whether the show could air given its source material as a BL novel. They likely had investors and backers pressuring them to make sure that the story was unambiguously straight.

Fans of the novel made a massive uproar about it, threatening to boycott the series. The backlash was so extreme that it became a bigger threat to the success of the show, and the straight romance was killed. We all owe a lot to those agitators! 😅

The BTS

The BTS clips were first discussed in an Untamed press conference (that section of the interview starts at around 36:30). The producer said that in the future some of the behind-the-scenes moments would be shared. GG and DD exchanged a glance and looked extremely uncomfortable with it.

A lot of turtles find that clip funny, and laugh about what GG and DD might 'have to hide', but I have never understood how fans can find GG and DD's discomfort funny.

It might surprise some newer turtles to hear that there were moments where GG and DD appeared to be uncomfortable with the BTS, but there were.

Another moment happened in an interview where GG and DD were asked to explain a BTS scene of the two of them in the boat, where GG is lying in DD's lap. DD turns to the interviewer with a shocked and displeased look on his face and says, "They released this?"

There were other moments as well, but I haven't kept a comprehensive record of all that. This happened long before I clued in on how quickly clips can disappear in this fandom.

I believe that it is totally normal to have mixed feelings about the BTS, and I believe GG and DD are no exception to that. No doubt they enjoy some of the clips and feel uncomfortable about some of them, just like many turtles (myself included).

There were official BTS clips released during promo, but the unofficial BTS clips didn't come until later. I talked in more detail about the unofficial BTS and how they came to be released here.

The unofficial clips began being released by fansites in the fall of 2020. It would be hard to overstate how different the atmosphere around them was to what it is now. Now it's quite common to find BTS clips all over the place, both in C-social media and on international sites like YouTube and Instagram.

However, back in 2020 they were extremely hard to get ahold of, and sharing them outside of where they were initially released was strictly forbidden and frowned upon by fans. In fact, if you dig back through my 2020 posts I'm sure you'll find many posts where I admonish people not to share the BTS clips, and where I bitch about people sharing them without authorization. I also answered a lot of asks about these issues at the time (just one example).

Times have changed a lot, and now everyone is sharing them all very freely without any concerns.

The situation was a lot different back then:

GG and DD had gained a tremendous amount of popularity from the show, but their reputations and careers were not yet fully established and secure.

227 was still an active concern that was still making news and still impacting GG's life directly. He had not yet recovered from any of it and was still mostly lying low. He was constantly being attacked and antis were constantly out to get him.

The Untamed was still fresh and current, and being discussed regularly in the media. Because filming was still fairly recent, what happened during filming would still run the risk of impacting GG and DD's lives and careers.

Fans were coming under very close scrutiny because of 227 and other fandom-related scandals. The government was starting to crack down heavily on fandom culture.

This was all uncharted territory. No one knew how the BTS might be received, or how it might impact GG and DD. Fans were very freaked out about the possibility of anything compromising getting leaked and harming the boys.

No doubt fansites were also worried about how fans might respond to some of the releases, and wanted to ensure they didn't upset or anger fans, or stir up more excitement than could be safely contained within the fandom.

All of this contributed to a climate of extreme caution and secrecy around the release of BTS clips.

We never knew when one might be released, and when they were released they were typically only put online for a few minutes, then deleted. This was all done in an effort to limit the exposure of these clips primarily to turtles who have GGDD's best interests in mind.

The clips were heavily watermarked and overlaid with visual and audio curses that 'reuploaders must die!' ('banyun biss', which I'm sure most of you have encountered in some of the clips you've seen).

Early clips were heavily watermarked.

Those who missed out were out of luck. It was extremely socially unacceptable to re-share clips once they'd been deleted. Those who missed out would have to rely on recaps and transcripts from those who had seen the clips. Fans took to staying up all hours watching and waiting for a release.

Back in those days people tried to save every clip they could, hoarding them greedily. Turtles' phones were filling up with large video files. It's funny to think about now, because the clips are everywhere and so easy to find these days, but back then it was a whole Thing.

The initial releases were sporadic and quite tame as fansites dipped their toes in the water of how all this would be received. Gradually over time clips became more frequent and stayed up longer, and some of the more salacious stuff began being released. Those clips were often accompanied by hilarious intro images.

(For those who don't get it, it's the PornHub logo).

Of course all of the clips were heavily discussed as they came out, and a clearer picture of GG and DD's relationship and of their experience of filming began to take shape over time. Some of the fake rumors (such as the 49 fake candies and the CPN that GG designed a racing suit for DD) were gradually proved to be true as these clips were released. However, that was mostly confined to fandom circles.

There were occasionally times when these clips or their content would cross over into the mainstream and start trending on Weibo. In many of those cases, the hotsearches would be bought and pushed by antis of GG and DD who want to see them cancelled. At those times turtles would jump into action to wash those topics and replace them with mundane, unrelated content.

There were fan theories and fake rumors about GG and DD's reaction to the clips. Sometimes when new clips were released GG and DD would be seen online and turtles assumed they were watching them. Of course, considering the clips featured them, it's highly likely that they did eagerly await releases just like the rest of us.

A large percentage of BXG light banners and slogans came directly out of the BTS, some of which you can see GG and DD discussing in LRLG rumors.

I suspect that it was likely a mixed bag for them. Some clips might have really stressed them out either upon initial release or after reactions began to emerge, while others likely made them laugh and feel nostalgic about filming.

Dumplings, rice noodles, 3+2 biscuits (cr @knivescharade in this post), discussed in this LRLG rumor.

There were definitely a few scandals and close calls that came out of the unofficial BTS, and solos and antis frequently tried to use them against GG and DD and tried to spin negative narratives about their relationship based using disingenuous takes and edits of them (they still do to this day).

For example, the clip where GG tells DD that he prefers a natural look to idol makeup was used against GG at the time, and antis tried to make it seem like GG was homophobic and that GG was against men wearing makeup. Some of the clips where they were playfighting or bickering were used to try to create a narrative that they hated each other. That kind of thing.

BTS and fan service

One of the most common questions I've gotten about the BTS - and I still often get this question - is, "Aren't the BTS just acted out/scripted as fan service to promote the show?"

There are a few reasons people have this question in their minds.

Solos #1 narrative about GGDD is that their CP was just for the show and the BTS was all fan service, and nothing about their relationship is real. They push this claim very aggressively on social media anytime GGDD or The Untamed is discussed, and new fans will almost always encounter those claims in this way.

CP fan service is a normal part of how dramas are promoted, so people familiar with Asian dramas will often immediately jump to that assumption about GG and DD and about the BTS.

Heteronormativity leads many people to immediately dismiss the possibility of a gay relationship, which leads them to try to come up with other explanations for those clips.

People naturally have a hard time believing what they're seeing with some of those clips. Some of it is pretty jaw-dropping and it's understandable that some people will be skeptical.

However, there are a lot of really good reasons why these clips are obviously not fan service.

For one thing, the show was billed as a martial brotherhood, not as a romance. Some of the official BTS clearly did try to appeal to CP and MDZS fans and could be counted as fan service, but those weren't even the ones BXG are most excited about. (There is a playlist of some of the official BTS clips here).

The most exciting stuff was never released during promo, and almost none of it is overtly romantic. A lot of it is really crude and totally unreleasable as promo. GG and DD are lewd, crude and often rude in ways that only two people who are really close could ever get away with. In many cases it's the casual way GG and DD constantly cross polite social boundaries with each other that shows their intimacy, rather than anything overtly sweet or romantic.

A lot of it is also totally incomprehensible to regular audiences. You have to be a turtle digging deeply into GGDD to understand the significance of most of it. For example the way GG took care of DD on his birthday, or the way DD constantly bargained and haggled with GG to get him to eat more.

Most importantly, if it was all fan service then why did GG and DD never do any joint CP endorsements? The entire point of doing that type of fan service is to make a buck. Other drama CP - including BL - do this all the time.

And it doesn't make sense that a production that was as low budget as The Untamed could afford to have the two lead actors learn a whole second set of lines and do a whole second performance that never ended up getting released.

And of course, none of that explains why the bulk of the BTS clips ended up in the hands of fans and released years after the show finished airing. A lot of it still has never been released to this day.

I've often joked that if the BTS were scripted they were far more complex, more melodramatic and better written than the drama itself. You just can't come up with this stuff in a writer's room. 😅

Anyway, this post got a bit long but hopefully it gives you a bit more of a picture of what it was all like at the time. Sorry, I guess I didn't talk much about my own feelings/reactions, but hopefully you can get somewhat of a sense.

Overall it was exciting, but I also had some deep reservations about it all (and got a lot of hate mail for voicing those feelings, too). Keep in mind this wasn't long after 227, so I think it's understandable that I was feeling very wary about everything.

But that's all water under the bridge now. It's been many years, and if the BTS were going to harm GGDD it would have already happened. I think it's all pretty safe territory now.

Edit: some more of my thoughts and feelings at the time:

One of the most exciting things for me about the BTS clips was seeing so many of the fake rumors being proved true. There were a lot of rumors (including the 49 fake candies) that I totally scoffed at when I first heard about them, only to later find via the BTS clips that I had been totally wrong about them and that these things had actually happened, and even crazier things were gradually revealed.

Things were changing pretty rapidly for a while there now that I think about it.

Learning more about their relationship and seeing just how much they looked out for each other was another big one for me. Also the timeline. The BTS really reinforced my belief in The Devil's Timeline (the belief that they got together prior to filming).

But overall that was a very different time in the fandom as well. There were always so many candies coming out, not just BTS clips but things that came out of GG and DD's activities and social media posts. It was a really really busy time in the fandom.

Since then there has been a government crackdown on fandom culture, on the entertainment industry, on LGBTQ etc. in China, plus DD's split with Nike and him having to delete a lot of his GG candy posts from his Weibo account.

Things are so different now, and unfortunately a lot of it for the worse. Being a turtle is not always easy, and I'm sure being GG and DD can't always be easy either. We make it work, but I do sometimes look back wistfully on the freer, more exciting times in the fandom.

More such times could come in the future. We just have to keep moving forward and hope for the best.

Somewhat related: I did a semi-comprehensive post about GG and DD's reaction to turtles here.

#bjyx #yizhan #untamed bts #the mysteries of yizhan #thanks so much #ask

[cozykdramakat]

Completed Dramas, Ranked

Masterlist of all the dramas I have finished and my rankings from 1-10. Keep in mind I don't usually finish dramas that I don't like, so most of these reviews will be 6+ ratings.

Recently added: Hot Stove League, My Dearest, Wedding Impossible, Vagabond

Twenty Five Twenty One - 10/10 Finished 2023-08 I will never recover from this drama. I cried and laughed and fell so in love with the entire cast. The friendship between the two female leads is beautiful. Nam Joo-hyuk the actor that you are. That ending will be permanently etched on my heart. Another incredible display of how talented female writers are in kdramas.

Favourite line: “It’s love. I love you, Hee-do. I don’t need a rainbow.” Tags: melodrama, sports, friends to lovers

Doom At Your Service - 10/10 Finished 2023-07 Cried my eyes out. Park Bo Young is too cute. The whole premise is so good and they do such a good job pacing it and throwing in twists to keep it interesting. Also has made me a huge Seo In Guk stan, the man is crazy talented at playing a villain with a heart of gold.

Favourite line: "Love me to the point that you will want to destroy the world for me." Tags: fantasy, melodrama, enemies to lovers

Reborn Rich - 10/10 Finished 2023-09 There has never been a better revenge drama. Succession meets time travel fantasy meets enemies to lovers romcom meets 90s period piece. Song Joong Ki absolutely nails it once again.

Favourite line: "There are 24 hours in a day and 365 days in a year. They say time is fair to everyone. However, time isn’t fair. Just like everything else in this world." Tags: revenge, enemies to lovers, time travel, 90s

My Name - 10/10 Finished 2023-07 Despite being traumatized by the ending, this is still one of my fave dramas. The acting. The fight choreography. The romance. 10000/10. Pil-do might be one of my favourite male leads ever. I love me a soft boy who would do anything to protect his strong, independent woman.

Favourite line: "Is life supposed to be fun?" Tags: revenge, action, enemies to lovers, gangs vs cops

Romance Is a Bonus Book - 10/10 Finished 2023 -07 So rewatchable. Truly the coziest kdrama out there. A great start into noona romances too. Also the line where she talks about how it was so nice to be called by her name, instead of “mom”, “honey”, “you” really stays in my heart. Also started my obsession with Jong-Suk.

Favourite line: "Instead of 'I love you,' soseki natsume said, 'the moon is beautiful." Tags: friends to lovers, noona romance, workplace romance, romcom, love triangle

Extraordinary Attorney Woo - 10/10 Finished 2023-08 Absolute perfection. Jun Ho is the new standard. Deals with autism in a surprisingly modern way. Some interesting episodes on feminism in the workplace too.

Favourite line: "All my thoughts tend to center around me, so I make people close to me lonely. I don’t know when or why I do that. And I don’t know what I can do to stop it." Tags: legal drama, autism, workplace romance

Captivating the King - 10/10 Finished 2024-03-03 Incredible directing. Best acting performance of the year surely from Jo Jung Suk. Perfect if you liked Kings Affection. So much tension, little bit gay in a great way, and the palace politics are actually so interesting. All the characters are very morally grey and make for such interesting stories.

Favourite quote: “I love to win but I cannot put up with boredom.” Tags: FL disguised as man, historical drama, enemies to lovers

Nevertheless - 10/10 Finished 2023-06 Female gaze times a million. And the supporting cast is one of my faves (except for the TAs, they were boring as all hell). It’s also one of the few kdramas that tackle a relationship that’s kind of “friends with benefits” and you can very much tell it was written by a woman.

I get why some people really don’t like this one, but I’m a big believer in not needing the main characters to be good people for it to be a good piece of art. Everyone is very flawed in this (nearing on toxic), but it tells a lot of important stories that I really connected with.

Favourite line: "I know it will cause me pain again. Nevertheless..." Tags: friends with benefits, college drama, red flag ml, love triangle

Hot Stove League - 10/10 Finished 2024-03 Baseball is life. Definitely the best sports drama out there, although it’s a close race with Love All Play. This drama has no romance, so I was really surprised that it hooked me so much. But the drama is amazing. The villains are so good. And mostly I just love this goddamn sport man. Even if you don’t like sport, I think you’ll enjoy the twists and turns and found family dynamics of this one. Also Park Eun Bin never misses.

Favourite quote: "Everyone's situation is different, we all fight with the resources that are available to us. If we start listing excuses, we'll lose again in the same situation." Tags: sport drama, found family, no romance

It's Okay Not to be Okay - 10/10 Finished 2023-07 This was a slow start for me because I found the main female lead so annoying at first. But trust me she grows on you. Literally one of my fave dramas now. The emotions are SO real, I was crying constantly. Very attached to this little trio now. And the parallels of the beginning and ending are soooo good. All the characters have so much character growth, some of the best writing I’ve seen in a kdrama.

Favourite line: "Your body is honest. When you're in physical pain, you cry. But the heart is a liar. It stays quiet even when it's hurting." Tags: enemies to lovers, autism, mental health

Alchemy of Souls - 10/10 Finished 2023-10 Absolutely binged this. Such a fun watch. The lore is really cool too. My only thing is I LOVED the female lead from S1 and it felt weird not to have her in the second season. Also second season felt a bit rushed on the ending. Otherwise perfection.

Favourite line: "If you stabe me, then I wil die as the one who released the assassin. If you withdraw your sword, I will make you another promise." Tags: fantasy, enemies to allies to lovers, magic, love triangle

Weightlifting Fairy Kim Bok Joo - 9.5/10 Finished 2023-08 Too cute for it’s own good. Male lead is adorable. Only docking points for some of the weird mentions of the female lead’s weight and her being ‘ugly’. Otherwise the perfect drama. Great for a light watch as there isn’t much drama between the couple really, they communicate well and most of the tension is in their family and career.

Favourite line: "You fool, I like you. Not as a friend, but as a woman. If I don't see you, I get curious. If you're depressed, I get upset. If you smile, it makes me happy. If you're sick, I get worried. It's driving me crazy. It means I like you, doesn't it?" Tags: friends to lovers, childhood friends, sports drama, college drama, romcom

Descendants of the Sun - 9.5/10 Finished 2023-09 Beautiful. So sad. Chemistry is insane between the main leads. I cried so much. Also the friendships between all the characters are really great. The plot too is amazing. Only docking it a half point because some of the military propaganda is a bit much for me, otherwise perfect.

Favourite line: "Regarding the kiss, what should I do? Should I apologize for that? Should I confess my feeling to you?" Tags: exes to lovers, military drama, melodrama

Vincenzo - 9/10 Very addicting, plot is crazy fun. Leads have so much chemistry. Some episodes ran on a bit though. Tags: revenge, legal drama, workplace romance

The King's Affection - 9/10 Love the premise. Essentially a gayer Mulan plotline. Rowoon is cute AND badass. Also can’t believe this is the same Park Eun Bin as Attorney Woo?? The range!!! Tags: fl disguised as a man, historical drama, kinda gay

Love All Play - 9/10 Only docking a point because Taejun’s whole family deserved the shit beat out of them instead of a stupid redemption arc. Otherwise the perfect romance angst. Taejun is THE green flag. Tags: sports drama, college drama, partners to lovers

Soundrack #1 - 9/10 Beautiful. Short. Simple. Some of my favourite leads. Great winter watch if you’re feeling like some cozy, friends to lovers vibes. Tags: friends to lovers, winter, music

Mr Queen - 9/10 Really good, really funny. Just wish the ending was more gay. Tags: body swap, time travel, historical drama, comedy

Start-up - 9/10 I can’t believe how underrated this one is. First love triangle story that actually had me questioning who I wanted to be endgame. The male leads are written so beautifully and they are both so complex and interesting. And the female lead has you rooting for her so much. I also really loved how they wrote such an insecure male lead, the character development was amazing to watch and Nam Joo Hyuk crushed it as per usual. Tags: workplace romance, paid to date you, love triangle

Happiness - 9/10 Really really good. I always thought it would be interesting to get a zombie story post pandemic. I just think some of the directing wasn’t great near the end. Some of the scenes just needed to hit a bit harder for me, considering I know how good this cast is in other dramas. Tags: zombies, friends to lovers, fake married, cohabitation

Dr Romantic 2 & 3 - 9/10 If you like Grey's Anatomy for the crazy end of season events, this is the show for you. Wil ride, amazing chemistry with the leads, loveable found family. Tags: medical drama, found family, rivals to lovers

Hospital Playlist - 9/10 If you like Grey's Anatomy for the relationships and friendship however, this is the show for you. Medical stuff is sometimes boring in this one, but the found family and ships 100% make up for it. Also there's like 100 episodes of behind the scenes to watch and the cast is too cute. Tags: friends to lovers, slow burn romance, medical drama, found family, ensemble cast, music

Castaway Diva - 8/10 Loved the first 10 episodes. But felt it didn't wrap up great, especially with the romance. Tags: stranded on a desert island, music, childhood friends, finding your first love

Marry My Husband - 8/10 It's good, but kind of burnt out on revenge dramas with time travel. Villains were great though and Na In Woo is adorable. Tags: time travel, revenge, ml falls first

My Dearest - 8/10 The tension between these leads is unmatched. Also just a gorgeous show. Little too dramatic for me. Like after the tenth time they just missed each other, I wanted to pull my hair out. Also desperate for a little epilogue in the last episode. Tags: romance drama, historical, fated love

Oh My Ghost - 8/10 I love Jo Jung Suk, and with Park Bo Young??? Match made in heaven. I’m desperate for them to get on screen together again. Fun fantasy elements. Both characters have so many flaws but they develop so well. Tags: enemies to lovers (ish), ghost possession, restaurant drama

Welcome to Samdal-ri - 8/10 For the Hometown Cha Cha Cha fans for sure. Definitely under utilized Ji Chang Wook (where are the epic kisses pls), but overall the leads had incredible chemistry. 2nd ML was annoying as hell though. Give all the awards to the little girl. Tags: friends to lovers, exes to lovers, love triangle, middle-aged drama

Suspicious Partner - 8/10 Super cute. SO much chemistry. Bit too melodramatic for me and the second female lead is a bit one-dimensional. Really funny though and a decent legal drama. Tags: legal drama, enemies to lovers, workplace romance, cohabitation

Wedding Impossible - 8/10 Enemies to lovers plus a fake relationship to hide your bestie is gay. It's mostly really fun and silly, the FL is one of my favourite korean actors, but it falls a part a bit in the middle of the season. Would have been saved with more scenes with Do Han and exploring what it means to be gay in Korea. Even just more scenes where he's happy. Great finale and fluff throughout for our main leads though. Tags: Enemies to lovers, fake wedding, beard for my gay best friend, idol story

Melting Me Softly - 8/10 Really great premise and the chemistry of the leads is unmatched. Don’t be fooled by the branding, this is very much more of a rom com than a melodrama. Really liked the directing too, beautiful show. Tags: time travel, shared fate, workplace romance

Revenge of Others - 8/10 You know I love a good revenge thriller. Very good series, incredibly gritty for a high school drama. Twist at the end was kind of meh though. And also wish there was more romance as the leads were so cute. Tags: little to no romance, high school drama, revenge

While You Were Sleeping - 8/10 Really great premise. The main trio are all so good. I just think some of the romance drama near the end was a bit annoying. Shoulda been like 3 episodes shorter, just got a bit tiresome. Tags: shared fate, fantasy (ish), legal drama

Fight For My Way - 8/10 Very cute friends to lovers. Great chemistry between the leads. Very similar vibe to Weighlifting Kim Bok Joo, just wish the last episode was a bit more impactful. Tags: friends to lovers, sports, college friends

King the Land - 8/10 Very cute and fluffy. Love both leads. Liked how there was no unnecessary drama between them. Really healthy relationship. Just not my favourite plot of all time, hasn’t hooked me like other shows. Tags: workplace romance, chaebol ml, hotel management

Crash Landing on You - 8/10 Definitely hooks you. Starts to drag in the last 5 episodes with too much melodrama. But I loved how they switched it up mid-way through. Really engaging. Also the chemistry with the leads is unreal, makes sense that they’re married in real life now. Tags: found family, north korea, enemies to lovers, melodrama

Moon in the Day - 8/10 Very solid fantasy romance. Found it a bit boring though in the middle. Kim Young Dae is defs underrated though. Hopefully this will kickstart him as a lead now. Tags: fantasy, loved each other in a past life, revenge, enemies to lovers to enemies to lovers again

Sh**ting Stars - 8/10 Like 90% fluff. Also cool to see the behind the scenes of k actor management. Lee Song Kyung literally plays enemies to friends to lovers perfectly. Nearly same love story as Dr Romantic and Bok Joo, love to see it. Tags: enemies to friends to lovers, college friends, acting drama

Business Proposal - 8/10 It’s pretty good, but very trope-y. If you like a chaebol romance or workplace romance you’ll love it. It just didn’t surprise me that much, so very middle of the road. One of the few times that I actually was more obsessed with the secondary love story than the main. Tags: workplace romance, fl pretending to be someone else

Let's Talk About Chu - 8/10 Kind of ridiculous but surprisingly deep and heartwarming. Loved the chemistry of all the couples. Tags: sex positive, queer secondary couple, friends with benefits, taiwanese

Destined with You - 7/10 Another drama where the chemistry of the leads really carry the show. Also Rowoon is so talented. I like the premise, but the execution was kinda messy and the first few episodes kinda drag until they let Rowoon being a goofy boi. Must watch though if you love fluff and soft bois. Tags: enemies to lovers, love potion, fantasy, past life, betrayal

W: Two Worlds - 7/10 Despite wanting to rewatch this show constantly, it is kind of a hot mess. Really fun though, just the plot is like a yo-yo. Insane chemistry with the leads. Tags: fantasy, love across universes (webtoon comes to life)

Lovestruck in the City - 7/10 Great show and then the last episode is just like really a bummer. The main couple are super cute though and I like the jumping back to the beach town. Good summer watch! Not sure I really like the mockumentary style, but it’s quite cute. Tags: mockumentary, short episodes, summer romance, exes to lovers

So I Married the Anti-Fan - 7/10

The beginning and middle are really good and cute. Ending is just kind of rushed and feels a bit disjointed from the plot. Overall fun rom com though!

Tags: rom com, enemies to lovers, kpop idol

Strong Woman Do Bong Soon - 7/10 It’s very cute, but just way too fluffy for me, especially near the end. It’s a good light watch if you’re looking for something like that. Highly recommend watching the behind the scenes of this series too, because Park Hung Sik is just so in love with Park Bo Young and it’s adorable. Tags: workplace romance, superpowers, comedy

Hometown Cha Cha Cha - 7/10 This was my very first drama so I really need to rewatch it as I don’t know if my review is just because it’s aged in my brain. But it’s very cute, very wholesome. Supporting cast is incredible. My only real issue with it is I don’t love the female lead as much as I like other leads, just didn’t root for her as much as I would have liked. Tags: small town, enemies to lovers, found family

Forecasting Love and Weather - 7/10 Bit boring, but the chemistry is unreal between the leads. Really good twist near the beginning that still sticks with me. Also love seeing Song Kang as little puppy dog heart of gold boi. Tags: noona romance, workplace romance

See You in My 19th Life - 7/10 Love the premise and the leads are amazing. Female lead in particular nails the role. Just a bit too melodramatic for me. Another one where the side characters really make the show, especially her sister. Tags: past lives, childhood friends, murder mystery

Vagabond - 7/10

Great action thriller, the political plot had me the whole time. Suzy never misses. But it ended on a cliffhanger and I wish I’d known that before. Especially since Season 2 hasn’t been announced 😭 Otherwise the romance is great, ML is incredible.

Tags: action romance, enemies to lovers, spy thriller

My Holo Love - 5/10 Kinda just meh. Like it was cute and fun but nothing special. Female lead was really good though. Also I do like the plot around face blindness, just not super memorable as a show in general. Tags: mystery, ml shut in

Love Alarm - 3/10 Too cringe and immature for me I think. Interesting premise though. Song Kang is really good in it (although he plays a massive red flag again lol), I just really didn’t like the other male lead to be honest. Tags: love triangle, fated love, fantasy (ish), red flag ml

#kdramas #kdrama reviews #2521 #extraordinary attorney woo #doom at your service #romance is a bonus book #my name #nevertheless #its okay not to be okay #weightlifting fairy kim bok joo #descendants of the sun #reborn rich #vincenzo #love all play #alchemy of souls #soundtrack no 1 #mr queen #start-up #happiness #dr romantic #castaway diva #marry my husband #the kings affection #oh my ghost #welcome to samdalri #suspicious partner #melting me softly #revenge of others #fight for my way #captivating the king

[hotvintagepoll]

Propaganda

Joan Crawford (Dancing Lady, Mildred Pierce, The Women)— God, where do I start!!! Her face is so UNIQUE and compelling and stands out so much. I love her thick brows and high cheekbones. She has a school-marmy hardness too her that makes her a little scary and therefore sexy. Her low thick voice also does it for me. Despite being an unusual looking woman with an unusual face, she never loses her glamour. Just a gorgeous talented actress, AND she was some sort of gay!!!

Louise Beavers (Imitation of Life)—louise beavers spent her whole life forced to play maids and housekeeper characters so as VENGEANCE, i am bringing forth every elegant picture of her i could find to demand justice! black vintage beauty! [pics below the cut]

This is round 3 of the tournament. All other polls in this bracket can be found here. Please reblog with further support of your beloved hot sexy vintage woman.

[additional propaganda submitted under the cut.]

Louise Beavers:

Joan Crawford:

I just love women that are very mean.

she was a smoke show in every decade, from the 20s to the 60s.

64.media.tumblr.com

The classic matronly beauty with amazing eyebrows

of course there's a space for MILF joan but i want to just take a second and say she was so cute in her early movies (like grand hotel and the women)! those parts often get forgotten but her stardom shines in them just as much as in her older #queen #icon roles

Misremembered for wire hanger hatred, this original screen queen mastered the art of the comeback and refused to let Hollywood toss her aside as she aged. The term “auteur” is usually revered for directors or writer-directors, but most critics have one actor they’ll give that title to as well: Crawford—anyone who knows classic movies already has a “Crawford picture” in their head. She knew how to style herself and promote herself. She made herself a star and kept herself fixated in the Hollywood firmament. What’s hotter than knowing just how hot you are?

(don’t think about Mommie Dearest right now) Joan was known for being super nice to all the like crew of the movies she worked on and she’d get everyone gifts. Joan would hold movie nights at her house and knit at the back of her home theater. Joan was sooo obsessed with other women including Greta Garbo, whos dressing room she would obsessively and purposefully walk by. She said that while working on Grand Hotel, Garbo grabbed her face and “if there ever was a time in my life where I would’ve been a lesbian, that was it.” But like Joan also probably did sleep with women including Barbara Stanwyck. Joan was so obsessed with Bette Davis, screening multiple movies of hers in a day at her watch party, constantly trying to spend time with her or do a movie together, insisting on the dressing room next to hers at Warners and sending her daily gifts… etc. Once Bette said that sex was gods joke to humanity and Joan said “I think the joke is on her.” Joan fucked a lot. Joan got caught publicly fucking a man and sent a letter to the woman who saw them basically saying “I bet it excited you” and the woman was like you know what. It did. Joan was best friends with a gay man. Joan was an actually genuinely good actress even though people mocked her a lot for being like cheap and stupid (partially because she never finished school because her family was broke). Joan was so insane and so cool that’s all.

#louise beavers #joan crawford #hotvintagepoll #fuck that old woman #ladies 3

[oopsiedaisiesbaby]

A lil unedited snippet of a long ass modern au I’ve been working on (it’s already at 40K and I’m not even halfway through) about OnlyFans Creator Steve and YouTube/TikTok Influencer Billy! NSFW of course 😘

Warnings: mentions of porn, Steve still in Straight Boy Steve mode, masturbation

“Shit,” Billy exhaled, eyes wide as he turned that over in his head. “That’s a lot of money for one video.”

“Right?” Steve looked at his phone, cringing at the thought of turning that kind of money down for a single custom request. “Oh well, I’m not gay anyways.”

“You’re telling me you couldn’t just stick it in a hole and think of Indiana for that much money?” Billy asked, tone incredulous.

Steve’s chuckles turned into full blown laughter when they made eye contact which set Billy off too. Kicking his legs out from under himself and planting them on the table next to Billy’s, Steve continued to stare at the amount in wonder.

It wasn’t just a regular custom request either. She was offering $1,111 for a first watch. She was saying he could send it out to the masses after a week. He’d had several requests for it since the first pictures of him and Billy hanging out had gone viral. He couldn’t imagine what he’d make after the $1,111.

“I don’t know,” Steve shrugged, turning his phone screen off as he settled in to continue watching the YouTube video still playing. “I guess, but it’s not like it matters anyways, you’ve got your reputation to worry about.”

“I didn’t want one to begin with,” Billy dismissed easily. “I have to hustle so fucking hard to find a sponsor to make, like, half of what you do on your weekly videos, much less getting $1,111 for one view! Now you’re telling me I could make just as much for getting fucked by your big ass cock? It’s unfair, I picked the wrong career to float me through college.”

“So you’d be into it?” Steve was very confused.

Was Billy suggesting that they actually give it a shot or just complaining to complain?

“I don’t know, maybe. Can you even get off with a dude?” Billy asked, shutting his MacBook and tossing it to the end of the couch.

“I mean,” Steve dragged out as he thought about it.

It was just like getting off with a girl, right?

“It can’t be that hard,” Steve decided, eyeing Billy contemplatively.

Billy gaped at him for a few beats before rolling his eyes and scoffing. He crossed his arms over his chest and turned his attention to the YouTube video still playing in the background. Steve burned at being dismissed so easily.

“Fine,” Steve declared, grabbing Billy’s phone and shoving it as his chest. “Let’s watch some gay porn and I’ll see if I can get off to it.”

“You can’t be serious, Steve,” Billy frowned at him, clutching his phone to his chest.

“Deadly,” Steve said, staring Billy down, refusing to give up.

Groaning like Steve was asking him to single handedly fix the climate crisis, Billy pulled up Safari and AirPlayed it to the TV. Steve turned around to watch him type PornHub into the browser.

“PornHub?” Steve cried, scandalized that Billy would even dare.

“I don’t have an OnlyFans account and you can get whole videos for free on PornHub,” Billy argued as he started scrolling through videos.

Steve was appalled. Personally offended.

“Creators only make penny’s per view on here, Billy,” Steve protested as Billy clicked on a video.

Rolling his eyes, Billy skipped the lewd ad and tossed his phone back onto the couch and settled in as the video started on the TV.

There was some horrible acting revolving around being in the locker room after practice for some undetermined sport. Steve didn’t miss the obvious parallels and bumped his shoulder into Billy’s when he saw him smirk out of the corner of his eye.

“You don’t have to deal with sad attempts at acting like this on OnlyFans,” Steve sniffed as the two actors flirted terribly.

“Shut up and watch the porn, you asshole,” Billy chuckled.

Sighing, Steve gave the video his full attention. The two guys were objectively attractive. He didn’t really feel one way or another as he watched them kiss and start undressing though.

He settled back into the couch, watching the two guys rub at each other through their briefs. Steve let his mind wander, already bored with the video. Could he fuck a guy for money?

He’d talked a big game a few minutes earlier, but he wasn’t so sure. Steve had never been attracted to a guy in his entire 21 years of life. Had never even thought about kissing a dude or thought twice about a man.

That was a lie. He’d thought twice about Billy a lot in high school. Only because Billy was constantly in his face and on his ass though. He’d become a bit consumed by his frustration with Billy for a little while there. Nothing gay though.

One of the guys dropped to the floor and immediately throated the other dude. It was kind of impressive. Steve vaguely wondered if Billy could do that. The noises coming from the TV were obscene and it had low level arousal crackling in Steve’s gut, but not enough to make him hard.

Steve’s attention was stolen back by the TV as one of the guys started eating the other’s ass. It was cool to know that ass eating was so universal, not bound by any one sexuality. He wondered how different eating a dude's ass was compared to doing it to a woman.

He considered asking Billy, but they were already watching porn together, he didn’t want to make it even more weird. Billy had mentioned Steve doing the fucking, he wondered if Billy would want to do it that way or if he’d want to fuck Steve. Steve wasn’t so sure if he’d be into that.

Billy shifted next to him, his bicep bumping against Steve’s. He tried to imagine eating Billy’s ass. It would probably be pretty hot, if Billy was a chick he’d have Steve’s dream ass for a partner.

Steve’s dick twitched at the sounds of moaning and focused on the screen again. One of the men was pouring lube along the other’s crack and pushing it in with his fingers. Steve considered touching himself just a little bit to see if that was enough to get him hard in combination with the foreplay happening on the TV.

It shouldn’t be too weird. They’d started the video with the intention of Steve seeing if he could get off to it. Steve gave in and slid his hand into his sweats to rub at himself through his boxer-briefs just as the guy on screen sunk into the other man.

Billy sucked in a sharp breath next to him and Steve felt himself start to chub up. Maybe he’d just been expecting too much, too early. Waiting till the actual fucking started must be the trick.

Rubbing at himself a little more insistently, Steve caught a whiff of Billy’s cologne as he crossed his arms, elbow bumping into Steve’s arm. Steve felt himself fill out further, his blood tingling with the electricity of arousal as he watched the two men on screen start going at it.

Humming as his cock reached full hardness, Steve pulled his hand out of his sweats, licked his palm and shoved it into his underwear to wrap his hand around himself.

“Christ,” Billy breathed, shifting around again.

Steve wanted to make a joke about how Billy had agreed to this exact thing happening, but he didn’t want to make it awkward. He decided to keep his mouth shut and start jerking himself off lazily as he tried to refocus on the screen.

On the TV, the two dudes were fucking rough and hard, both moaning loud and obnoxious. The dramatics were a bit of a turn off, but Steve was determined to make his point. He tried to let himself just get absorbed in the mechanics of two bodies engaging in sex.

He didn’t think it would work if Billy sounded like that. He rubbed his thumb under the head of his dick, biting his lip as he tried not to lose his hard on. Billy’s foot started bouncing on the edge of the coffee table, shaking Steve’s leg in the process.

Steve felt a fat drop of precum blurt out of his cock. He started working his hand a little faster as the men on screen switched positions, from doggy to missionary. Maybe Steve was lame, but he fucking loved missionary.

He moaned under his breath a little bit as more precum started leaking out of the head of his dick, making the slide a little easier. Billy let out a sharp breath, shifting on the couch a little more aggressively.

Steve glanced over to see Billy flushing, arms still crossed over his chest. Letting his gaze drop to Billy’s lap, Steve could see that Billy’s dick was hard as a rock in his sweats. Before he could think twice, Steve was running his mouth.

“It’s cool if you get off too,” Steve whispered, eyes locked on Billy’s now burning red face. “Kinda the point if we’re actually gonna make the video.”

With a huff, Billy dropped his arms, letting a hand settle against the outline of his dick. When he started rubbing at it gently, Steve turned his attention back to the screen. The moans still sounded so fake and it was hot to watch people get off but the performance of it all was settling wrong in Steve’s gut.

He shoved his sweats and boxer briefs down to free his cock, hoping that eliminating the restriction of movements might help. Billy gasped quietly next to him, breath warm on Steve’s shoulder and Steve’s dick twitched in his hand. Steve turned to look at Billy, eyes sticking on the movement of Billy’s hand in his sweats.

The soft, breathy, little groans Billy was letting out were so much better than the obnoxious noises coming from the TV. Steve knew he liked his porn more authentic though so it wasn’t too much of a surprise to him.

He briefly wondered what Billy looked like hard. Steve had seen him soft in the showers after basketball more times than he could count. That thought sent Steve into a tailspin wondering how Billy had never gotten hard in the locker room.

Maybe he’d never been attracted to anyone on the team. Which had Steve wondering what Billy’s type was. Would Billy be able to get off with Steve? He had to know.

“Wanna see it,” Steve murmured, looking up at Billy’s face when blue eyes snapped to meet his.

Billy stared him down for a moment, chewing on his bottom before finally pulling his cock out. Steve let his eyes drop to Billy’s dick, curious. He wasn’t as long as Steve but he was a little bit thicker.

Groaning, Steve started fisting his cock a little harder. Yeah, he could do this. They both watched each other work their hands over their dicks for several beats. Billy moaned as he thumbed over the head of his cock.

Steve licked his lips as he leaned forward a little bit to get a better look at the precum leaking out of Billy’s dick. Aesthetically speaking, Billy’s cock looked great in his fist. Steve wondered if he would need to suck Billy’s dick if they filmed together.

He got stuck on thinking about what cum might taste like. Some women acted like it tasted like a five star meal while others acted like they were drinking battery acid. Steve was curious which one it actually was.

Letting his eyes drift up to Billy’s face to check in on how he was faring, Steve lost himself for a moment as his gaze locked with Billy’s intense fiery blue eyes. Steve’s cock twitched in his hand as Billy licked his lips in his peripheral.

Billy had such girly lips. Steve wondered if they were as soft as a chick’s. He’d have to find out if they were gonna film together.

“Lemme just,” Steve whispered as he reached his free hand out to bury in Billy’s curls.

Billy nodded, gaze dropping to Steve’s lips, as he let Steve pull him forward and smash their lips together. Grunting and tilting his head, Billy swiped his tongue over Steve’s lips. Without a second thought, he parted his lips and moaned as Billy licked into his mouth.

Twisting his hand around his dick just a little bit faster, Steve fell into the kiss. He liked kissing. Billy was actually a really good kisser.

Steve was so distracted by the kiss he couldn’t even hear the sounds coming from the TV anymore and he was grateful.

The wet smack of their lips, Billy’s breathy groans, the slick sound of their hands on their cocks, Steve’s own pleased noises getting lost in Billy’s mouth. It all sounded so much better than what was on screen and it had electricity crackling through Steve’s veins as he hurtled closer and closer to an orgasm.

Billy pulled away, gasping for air before he dove back in. He buried a hand in Steve’s hair and tugged roughly. He angled Steve’s head until the kiss was even more wet and deep, even more perfect. Steve whined as his impending orgasm tingled low in his gut.

It was when Billy started sucking on his tongue that Steve felt lightning bolt up his spine and through his finger tips. He froze as his orgasm sparked through him, whining into Billy’s mouth as his cum spilled wildly over his own fist.

Billy ripped away from Steve, his gaze dropping to Steve’s dick as Steve fisted the last of his cum out. Shuddering as he made a concerned choking noise, Billy’s hand sped up on his own cock as he started to shoot up onto his bare chest. Steve watched, fascinated as Billy trembled silently through his orgasm.

They both collapsed into the couch, panting, dicks still out. Steve grinned to himself as he realized he’d won. He’d actually done it even though Billy implied he couldn’t. It’d been a pretty good orgasm too.

“Told you so,” Steve gasped out, turning his pleased smile on Billy.

Billy just looked at him like he’d lost his damn mind, chest still rising and falling rapidly.

“So are you in or are you in?” Steve asked, wiping his hand on his already soiled t-shirt.

“Guess I’m in,” Billy agreed, although he looked as if he felt shocked by his own words.

#harringrove #billy x steve #billy hargrove #steve harrington #harringrove fic #harringrove fanfic #harringrovefic #harringrove ficlet #harringrove fanfiction #steve x billy #onlyfans steve #influencer billy #oopsiewrites

[bkatlips]

Ranking and explaining my rankings of Mike Flanagan’s shows and how they make me feel in honor of spooky season and just finishing Usher!! Why not!! Everyone else is doing it!! I’m also going to give it a gay score based on how gay they are (which also includes how big of a role gay characters played).

Disclaimer: Every one of these shows is well-made in one way or another and deserves to be watched based on whether someone else finds the premise interesting and not whether I liked the show. Too often I see “that show was bad to me therefore you shouldn’t watch it” and I disagree with that line of thinking.

1. The Haunting of Bly Manor-I can already hear people screaming “Hill House is better!” In some ways, yes! In some very important ways, however, I disagree. The biggest being Bly Manor emotionally resonated with me a lot more. The themes, the found family (as someone who is an only child), and of course, the lesbianism. Dani’s story of compulsory heterosexuality may be one of if not the best in media and her love story with Jamie ended up being one of the best media has to offer, too. And really using a horror story and turning it into a love story is kind of brilliant (and annoying for the people who were just there for the jumpscares I guess). Don’t get me wrong the show has flaws (why the FUCK do Peter and Rebecca have so much screentime? was that eight episode really the best placement?) but the stuff that lands, really really lands. I’m still thinking about Dani and Jamie 3 years later. Hannah’s episode was very well done. The kid actors little Amelie and Ben were phenomenal. Upon rewatch you notice most decisions and dialogue in the show were made with some purpose and it usually relates to something thematic. Some people may say it doesn’t really have one defining central thesis therefore making it messy, but to me the fact it has many themes actually makes it more fun to think about. Gay score: 100000/10

2. The Haunting of Hill House-A horror classic that got me into Flanagan! This is Flanagan’s best series as far as making you pee your pants. That hat man is just scary! The character work is nice. Those first 6 episodes are incredible. Perfect. The thing that brings it under Bly Manor for me is honestly the ending. It left something to be desired for me. I can’t pinpoint exactly what it is, but it just did not conclude in such an emotionally resonant way as Bly Manor to me. Shout out to the Newton Bros because the music on this damn show (and Bly too but that’s basically Hill House music continued) is so so good. Also the character work is masterful because Shirley Crain is kind of a bitch but you do come to love her. In fact, there wasn’t a Crain I didn’t feel for. They’re deeply fucked up, sympathetic people. It’s a great show with some great thematic work but it just doesn’t speak to me quite as much as Bly, that’s it. I know that’s unpopular but it is what it is. A great good show nonetheless. Gay score: 8/10

3. The Fall of the House of Usher-This show is wild and honestly I couldn’t decide between ranking this one or Midnight Club third. I went with this one because the acting and technical stuff was so phenomenal. I’m not really into gore horror so this wasn’t like my thing on the surface but I do appreciate what a homage to Poe it is in the very limited knowledge of Poe’s work that I have. It was fun to see all the cast from previous shows back again especially T’nia. One of the downsides to this show is it doesn’t really make you feel a lot and so compared to the Haunting shows for me that makes it inferior for sure. But it’s a fun watch and honestly I need to rewatch the final episode because I had a hard time paying attention for that one. Gay score: really fucking queer/10

4. The Midnight Club-Ah Flanagan’s little dud. This one is really not very loved compared to the others, seems to be just about nobody’s favorite, however personally I liked it. I think people are a little unfair to it and while it may not be Flanagan’s best, I don’t think it’s awful. It doesn’t really tackle anything new when it comes to themes. There’s some death, grief, stages of acceptance, and cult stuff. I think the way it has these kids telling stories to deal with their reality was really brilliant in a way. There was one episode (six I think) that dealt with depression and suicide that made me sob and I thought was super well done. That one stuck with me.I think it would have benefited from a more likeable main character and also from the second season that was planned! Gay score: 6/10

5. Midnight Mass-To be honest, I probably could have gone without watching this show. It just didn’t really resonate with me and didn’t really entertain me save like the very last two episodes. It’s technically well-made and I appreciate what Flanagan was trying to do and convey with the danger of cults and religion. It was obviously a very personal project and was him working through his own experiences but it wasn’t for me. It had a few too many monologues and I don’t think monologues make an interesting character piece. However, it’s a critically acclaimed work so I recommend anyone who wants to check out Flanagan’s work still check it out! Especially if you like weird vampire stuff I guess. Also the acting especially from the priest was phenomenal. So there’s definitely pros to this show, but it didn’t add anything to my life for me! Gay score: 3/10 :/

Also, shout out to Mike because every single one of these shows is queer to one degree or another. He loves the gays! Ally! Bisexual wife probably helps too!

#the haunting of bly manor #the haunting of hill house #mike flanagan #the midnight club #midnight mass #the fall of the house of usher #bly manor #hill house #thobm #jamie and dani

[sleeper9]

Birth of the Beatles rewatch

I’m now motivated to rewatch birth of the Beatles since it’s been awhile (6 months) here’s my thoughts:

What I remember liking about this movie is it starts with the Beatles in their leather looks right away and just the image of them walking around like this in their “cool uniforms” is so funny to me and you can see why Paul was like “people would make fun of us” lmao.

I think the likenesses in this movie is actually not that bad especially George and Paul but the man playing John is just clearly too old (although I don’t think he does a bad job). Also is this the only movie that actually shows Paul being an absolute nuisance and insane lad??? The energy is off the charts (which is true to life)

They’re kinda cute idk

John calling Paul a beauty right away mmhmm you know that’s right.

It’s leopold and loeb themselves! The nerk twins! I like how much they attack people together and George is a good back up. It’s amazing how Beatles movies cannot get this dynamic at all right. But Paul being so supportive of Stu… lmao…

John and Paul goofing off together in the background you know that’s right. I like to hear johns silly little giggle

George always calling Paul “paulie”… so cute

Timeline gets real messed up in the middle bit. They skip over the paris trip of course 😔… imagine someone actually showing Paul and Johns trip like… revolutionary it would be

Enter Brian!

They really said Yah these boys were hot!

I like how they make such a big deal about trying to convey Brian is a GAY man and then the very next scene

Paul and John just out here looking like a married couple

Damn John where you putting that hand!

Damn these bitches really laugh in your face!!! (When you know in reality they were bowing saying oh yes pls mr Epstein)

Paul getting scared of a red light and Brian being like stop being a DIVA Paul. But omg these ungrateful little bitches being like you’re a failure Brian! Shut up Brian! Smh. At least they throw in a scene of John being super nice. There’s lots of scenes of John being really nice.

When John and Cynthia kissed after hearing they got the record deal I seriously thought Paul was gonna lean in and smooch George. The Paul actor gives off big I’ll shag anyone energy which is once again very rare!

Kinda appropriate the movie ends with John getting depressed out of nowhere lol… also very rare to have a message of no Beatle is better than the other

#the birth of the beatles #the beatles #personal #john lennon #paul mccartney #george harrison #ringo starr #brian epstein

[chaifootsteps]

Okay sorry I was talking with my mother

1) I hate sir Pentious’s new character. Sure, he’s fun. But oh my gosh, I miss his old character. The way that’s he’s not at all remorseful and just purely wants destruction  and to rule over the pentagram city. But now he’s too goody goody(I haven’t seen the new episode, pls don’t spoil it), and turned WAYYYY to easily over to Charlie’s anti-Christ ass, and wanting to be redeemed. He should have stayed a spy for longer and I would’ve loved to see his dynamic grow with the Vees(especially Vox) and how he worked for them as a spy. His rape scene wasp so uncomfortable and unnecessary, and speaking of that his and cherris relationship should of never of even been thought about. It’s such an awkward thing, as they’re rivals and Cherri has destroyed things that he’s made and insults him.

2) speaking of Cherri, she offered Angel drugs(which seems like it’s a normal thing for them as she’s so causal about it) when she knew he was there at the hotel that’s for redemption, but also she was so rude to Angel when he was trying to get Nifty out of the cleaning closet??? She’s a much better friend in the pilot and in the addict music video. She’s showing actual friendship and concern for Angel, nothing like she does now.

3) Alastor. Sure, I like his moments, but he’s so painfully edgy it’s not that good. His radio sound effects are good, I miss the old effects that he had in the pilot and his old voice actor, but of course viv is a “it’s my way or the high-way” gal and she dumped all of the previous cast. He’s nearly completely different now, claiming that Charlie is like his daughter(I swear to god he better be manipulative to her in that moment), when in the pilot he openly mocked her and what she was trying to do. He seems way to open about his emotions and wanting r help Charlie, using a TV(???) and playing along when what she wants to do. He also seems to much like an attention whore, which could be a good character trait if he wasn’t the way he is now. Also he’s too touchy touchy with everyone, especially Charlie.

4) Angel dust is not as interesting now as he was to me in the pilot. Now he’s just a porn star who gets raped and abused and is going to be redeemed. I’d love to see his old character traits(from before the pilot and during, such as mafia, insane, violent, ect), rather than just “oh he’s a gay sex spider who sometimes does violence but he’s such a good person now for finding love and refusing drugs!!!! :3”.

5) Husk’s new voice. I see the appeal of his new one, but his old voice actor just hit different. Make that skinny 1970s gambler man sound like he smokes 5 packs a day. Also I can’t stop thinking about the cat from Coraline.

6) almost everything about vaggie. Her design, her actions, and her backstory. It’s cool that she’s a fallen Angel but oh my gosh!! Don’t reveal that in the first season!! Slow burn that shit!! And why did she do quickly realize that he’s murdering ‘innocent souls’?? They’re in hell for a reason, she didn’t have to think that just because it was a kid it was innocent of any crimes it did. They revealed it too soon, it would have been a good twist for season 2.

7) vivziepop seemingly mocks Christianity and I had to look up how Saint Peter looked like, AND SHE WHITE-WASHED HIM SO BAD. HE LOOKS NOTHING LIKE HE SHOULD, AND HES SUCH A COMPLEX PEROSN FROM THE BIBLE AND AND SHORTENED HIS CHARACTER SO BADLY.

Anyways, my TED talk is over. Thank you

Thanks for your TED Talk, Anon. It was an excellent talk.

#Anonymous #vivziepop critical #hazbin hotel critical #viv stuff #actual blog post

[lurkingshan]

Kinou nani tabeta/What Did You Eat Yesterday?

You should know that I attempted to start this write up about half a dozen times before I managed to get a single word down. Every time I tried I just ended up staring at the wall. I don’t think I’ve been this emotionally stunned by a show since I Told Sunset About You, and I don’t say that lightly!

So, is this a good show? My god, YES. What an understatement. Let me tell you, as my MDL can attest, I’ve watched nearly 300 dramas. I’m sure I’ve watched even more Western shows since I had a 30 year head start on those. And I can say confidently that I’ve never seen anything quite like this gem.

Kinou nani tabeta, or What Did You Eat Yesterday?, is a drama about two middle aged gay men living their everyday lives, making and sharing food, reckoning with their identities and expectations, and figuring out how to be together in a long term relationship. That’s it, that’s the show. If that sounds boring to you, I gotta tell you: YOU ARE WRONG.

We meet Shiro and Kenji when they’re in their mid 40s and already a couple years into living together. Over the course of the show, we learn more about their relationship - how they got together, how they differ, where they struggle, where they shine, what they are still figuring out - and we see them work through it all, together. We see them at work, with friends, with their families, out in public, and in the privacy of their own home - we get a full and complete picture of their lives. And we are invited in to experience it with them and get up close and personal with their relationship in a way that feels both cozy and thrilling.

Now, I am not going to go into detail about everything that happens in this show, or attempt to provide deep analysis about its story, its characters, or the various cultures it depicts. This show was released in 2019, the manga began its run many years before that, and there are folks on this website - like @isaksbestpillow and @bengiyo - who have been at this a hell of a long time and thus have a broader context and lived experience from which to critically examine the show and its messages as they relate to Japanese familial values, life as a queer man from an older generation, and building community while living in a culture that is actively hostile to who you are. I implore you to go read their thoughts and learn from their wisdom. But what I will do is mention a couple (3… no 4, okay 5!) things that really made it stand out to me, a lifelong romance reader, avid media consumer, and drama enjoyer (I’m going to keep plot stuff vague because I hope if you’re reading this, you will be watching very soon!):

Let me repeat: this is a drama about a middle aged couple in a long term relationship, and the ongoing growth and deepening of their relationship is the main plot. Do I have to tell you how unique that is? The romance genre is rarely interested in what happens after the couple gets together, and even in other dramas featuring a couple in a LTR, the plot is usually about something else with the relationship in the background. And I’m fairly sure this is the only show of this nature in the entire bl genre (@absolutebl please fact check me if I’m wrong). In this show, the relationship is the point. It’s a rare look at what it actually takes to learn to deal with your baggage and share your life with someone, and I found it deeply moving.

My god these actors. With all due respect to the many fine actors in the bl industry, these two are on another level. We just never get to see seasoned actors of this caliber headlining ql dramas. If I have one tiny critique of this show, it’s that I found the moments when they let us listen in on the characters’ internal monologues mostly unnecessary - every emotional beat played out in their faces and body language. There’s this one scene I can’t stop thinking about, where the main pair are fighting, and one of them says something he doesn’t mean, and you see the regret on his face instantly, followed by a quick aborted movement as if to take it back, but his partner has already turned away and doesn’t see it. Just perfection. And the acting was so good in the finale (@waitmyturtles informed me my absolute fav moment was improvised for fucks sake) that it actually laid me out for like an hour, I was just sitting there in a crying daze.

The writing is so fucking smart. What’s absolutely brilliant about this show is that it’s structured like an episodic slice of life drama, but there is a deeper long term emotional arc at play and the writers forget nothing. Just like in life, in each episode something will happen, it won’t really get fully resolved, and the characters will move on. But on this show, it always comes back around, usually when your guard is down and they can inflict maximum damage by sucker punching you right in the solar plexus. I can hardly believe how many times this show managed to sneak attack me with emotional realness (official Shan cry count: 8/12 episodes caused me to burst into tears, sometimes more than once).

This show will take you through every possible destination on the spectrum of human emotion. I was so emotional while watching this show, in every sense. Crying both happy and sad tears. Swinging wildly between giddy delight, deep sadness, low key anger, and belly laughing. Sometimes the switch happens literally one scene to the next! And yet, there is an evenness to the tone and assuredness to the filmmaking that makes it all feel smooth. You never feel jerked around by the narrative. This is a credit to the writing, acting, and editing all coming together with perfect precision. The people who made this show are masters of their crafts.

OBVIOUSLY I MUST MENTION THE FOOD. Every episode of this show features at least one instance of a character making Japanese food that looks like the best thing you’ve never gotten the chance to eat. I do not recommended watching this without feeding yourself first, because it will have you salivating. And they don’t just show you the characters making the food (even narrating the recipes for you!), they always show you the characters actually eating and enjoying it. Some real foodies were involved in this production and as someone who loves to eat and absolutely was raised to view feeding people as a love language, I loved it.

So now that you are obviously dying to watch it, you must be wondering: where can I find this show? Let me point you to this post on @kinounaniresource, where the amazing Siiri has compiled all the video files and English subs you need. If you’re not familiar with how to use these, you’ll find instructions on her blog (if you get confused come ask me, please don’t bug her about it). I know sometimes shows being a little hard to access is a big deterrent to watching them, but please trust me that this is absolutely worth your time and effort, you will not regret it.

#kinou nani tabeta #what did you eat yesterday? #japanese bl #jdrama #man i am on such a good run with the classics lately #shan recommends #shan shouts into the void

[celluloidbroomcloset]

Hi, first thanks for all the great meta and analysis❤️

So, I recently noticed this an increase of something that really annoys me: whenever the canyon stumbles upon an opinion they don’t agree with they’re acting like Con O’Neill is this helpless baby that needs protection from people criticising a character he played/his acting choices (because that obviously equals a personal attack🙄).

And as if he is this groundbreaking queer actor that has done more for the LGBTQIA+ community then David with OFMD. 

Don’t get me wrong, I absolutely respect Con O’Neill and I do believe him that he is queer (despite there having been some valid doubts in the past) but I honestly don’t see that he played Izzy as gay (again, not on him, he just went with the role of the antagonist that he was given and did that really well, and then the Izzy fans tried to make it something that it was not). And if he did try to play Izzy as gay within the limitations of that script, then ok….an old white cis gay man who also falls into that hurtful trope of queer coded villain…tell me how that is groundbreaking representation again?

The same goes for “all of the other queer roles” he played according to the canyon. There are two of that I think: 

1)Cliff Costello, Cucumber (another old white gay men in a show with some very backwards views about how you are only properly gay if you get fucked in the arse or fuck others in the arse. No, I’m serious, the whole premise of the show is how horrible it is that the protagonist dosnt like anal!)

2)Val Pearson, Uncle (a character that fits every horrible stereotype of how trans people look, Con O’Neill stans love to claim that aCtUaLlY Val is gender fluid, but that is purely a head canon and never established in the show! If you know how 2000s media classically portrayed trans women and always made them the butt of the joke, this role is exactly(!) reproducing all of that).

Both of these are just side character btw. 

And I’m not blaming Con O’Neill for taking on these very problematic roles, as queer people we often have to take whatever representation we are given. Still -especially as a queer person- we don’t live in the 80s anymore you are allowed to be more critical about the roles you take on.

And I don’t think /he/ was the problem with these roles, I actually watched Uncle and like the way he played that character but that dosnt change the fact that the character itself is written deeply transphobic.

So maybe we shouldn’t pretend that they’re great representation?

And maybe we shouldn’t act as if Con had specifically chosen to play queer characters?

Like two deeply offensive stereotypical LGBTQIA+ characters in 40 years acting career? -that’s not more then your regular straight actor has played.

He is a decent actor but it annoys me that the canyon tries to turn him into this activist or something!

Wow, this got longer then I expected, sry just had to vent a little after seeing some rather outlandish canyon takes in the wild😅

OK, before I answer, I want to remark that this is a very thorny issue. I am not trans, and I know that there are some trans people who saw themselves in Izzy's characterization especially in Season 2 or discovered their own gender identity through that character. That's absolutely valid, and no one should ever say that it isn't.

I have not seen Con O'Neill in anything other than OFMD. From what I've seen, he's a good actor and seems a lovely guy who strongly supports fans and the LGBTQ+ community. But I can't speak to the other roles he has played because I have not seen them.

I read Izzy as queer, yes, though that's less explicit in the first season. He's very much the "queer-coded villain" trope, which is a homophobic trope...but as with everything OFMD does with tropes, it's subverted because—surprise!—almost everyone is queer. Izzy is very much an archetype of toxic masculinity and I think part of the point of the character is to develop how queerness does not always equal liberation.

I think it's very easy to fall into stan culture and arguing that the actor is the role and vice versa (so a criticism of Izzy is somehow a criticism of Con O'Neill). We have an additional layer here that this is a very queer show watched by a lot of queer people who see themselves, some for the first time, on the screen, and so are naturally defensive of the show itself, the specific characters, and the actors who play them. And that can cause a lot of problems too, especially if you're invested in the character who is canonically The Antagonist. To complicate it further, he is representative of a very common trope that for a long time was the major way queer people were represented at all in mainstream media, and we have people reading him as though he is the sole queer character. Which he likely would be, in many other stories...but not here.

It's a complicated issue. I wish that we could all step back a bit from our emotional investment in these characters and actors and recognize that they are part of a TV show that wears its tropes on its sleeve, and that just because an actor is a lovely person in real life, he is not his character.

#ofmd #our flag means death #reply #izzy hands #con o'neill

[andguesswhat]

I normally don’t do this but here is the thing: Yes, of course it's his decision and yes, of course he's not forced to sign contracts, yadayadayada, but I still feel sorry for him, because to me it looks like he thinks he has to do that and unfortunately doesn't see any other option. And I think the main reason is that he lives in this bubble and is friends with a gay Hollywood star, whose advice he listens to, like you know how you shouldn't play superheroes and stuff.

Yes, I’m talking about fucking Leo!  He may be a nice guy, but come on, he has the creepiest image you can have, he doesn't seem to care, and he doesn’t stop doing that shit. He could risk it, he’s famous enough, and still, he somehow doesn’t.

So what if everyone in your bubble tells you to do it and that it's okay, that it's no big deal, that you let them talk, etc? Kind of works for Leo, doesn’t it? (well….)

You can be intelligent as fuck and not see it. Or maybe even see it and still act differently because all the people around you are driving you to.

And not every action can be rationally justified. Especially not with such an emotional peach.

Because there is definitely an emotional decision behind it, whatever it is.

It's the hope of being as famous and successful and becoming an acting legend.

It’s the fear of not playing along with the studios and screwing things up.

And maybe it's even shame because you're not who the studio bosses would like you to be.

The shame of having dated a married family man who has had to endure kink shaming, whose kink you most likely share, who has fallen from grace.

It can be so many things and everything, in the end it's all human emotions that make you do something like that. 

You can be damn intelligent and still do wrong things.

You may know the damage you are doing, even to yourself, and still think you have no choice.

You do things that you know are not good for your health.

He is intelligent, but that doesn't mean he is in all situations in his life. It doesn't mean he knows what's good for him personally. He can’t even know what's good for his career. There are too many uncertainties and necessary coincidences at play for that. Only time will tell. It’s a game you can either win or lose.

The crux is that he started way too early with this shit, so soon, if he's not careful, he'll be known as a celebrity that can act. Because unfortunately I see that the same way as others: Paul Mescal and co. will be taken as good actors. He will be the actor who dated Kylie.

And it will dull him. Maybe he'll get his act together, but if he continues he'll keep losing his pureness. Because who knows: is he as tough as Leo or is he just hoping to be?

So there of course is always another choice but if you don't see it, what can you do? If you see it but nobody encourages you to take it, what can you do?

And even if ... As much as I would love to see him as a lower profile actor in small movies and on stage ... when I think about when I saw him happiest in the last year, the pictures from the shoot in New York come to my mind. Yes, from my point of view, a wrong choice, a stupid commercial shoot, driving him away to become an acclaimed actor, but look at him, he was so happy and proud to work with Scorsese.

And when I think back to the other happy moments that happened a year ago. He was so happy and proud to promote Bones & All, a movie he co-produced, and at the same time he was able to express himself with his stunning outfits and show the world who he really is, without having to define his sexuality.

Why would he want to give that up? Can’t you imagine how hard this is to give up? When nobody can tell you what happens when you leave the path?

So, in the end, he has all my sympathy even when I don’t think his decisions are good or wise, I’m still rooting for him that he achieves everything he wants to achieve and i'm hoping that at the end of the day he rests beside someone he loves deeply and very stubbornly.

#hope this makes sense somehow

[bengiyo]

Comfort Films Tag

Rules: List 7 of your comfort movies, then tag 7 people.

Tagged by @callipigio

1 - Shelter (2007)

I often joke around here about how I’ve been watching queer cinema for over half of my life at this point, and it’s easy to recommend this film. This is a coming of age film about a guy who gave up art school to become the primary breadwinner and caregiver for his family. However, when the older brother of his best friend returns to their town to collect himself, our artist and he reconnect and find something special between them. Great use of a young actor in this shores up the caregiving aspects.

I’m probably going to rewatch it now. Because it was produced by Here! TV, you can only legally watch it via a subscription to their platform. I own it on DVD because I fell in love with it and knew I needed to keep it forever.

2 - Big Eden (2000)

Big Eden. Oh, Big Eden. This is the film equivalent of a warm blanket and a tight hug. It’s about an artist named Henry Hart, who is preparing for a big exhibition in New York when he’s called back home to Montana because his uncle has had a stroke. We are greatest with the most queer-friendly town to ever exist as Henry manages his old angst about his straight best friend as the local general store owner also secretly pursues him. It’s absolutely lovely.

3 - The Blues Brothers (1980)

Luna has great taste, because this is one of the best films ever made. What was originally just an SNL bit turns into a fun road film about getting the band back together so that two brothers can raise enough money to pay the back taxes owed by the orphanage they grew up in. We also run over Illinois nazis in this movie and demolish dozens of cop cars. Cab Calloway, James Brown, Carrie Fisher, Chaka Khan, Paul Reubens, and Aretha Franklin are in it. John Candy orders orange whips. This is the kind of film I would watch with my dad any time it was on.

4 - Master and Commander: The Far Side of the World (2003)

This is one of the most man movies ever made. I don’t know any woman who wants to sit down and watch this film, but me and boys will spend an entire afternoon on this film in a heartbeat. The sexual tension between Russell Crowe’s and Paul Bettany’s characters goes unremarked on this website in a way that lets you know for sure this hellsite is dominated by femmes, because those two have definitely fucked. At least twice. It’s 1805 and oceans have become battlefields!

5 - Clue (1985)

A movie based on the board game of the same name should not have been this good, but it instead goes on to become a camp masterpiece. Many people will end up remembering Tim Curry for Rocky Horror or even Muppet Treasure Island, but this is still one of his favorite performances for me. This film is batshit and I love it. 

6 - Camp (2003)

Speaking of camp films, let’s talk about one of the best of all time. I know we often talk about the bad singing in Thai BL, but I unironically love all of the musical theater in this film. I regularly listen to this soundtrack, and have been for over 15 years. It’s a film about a bunch of weird theater kids who get to escape the bullying and hellishness of their lives for a few weeks during the summer, where they get to put on a bunch of classic plays. It’s so camp. I love this film because it was difficult for me to find queer films that had happy components with them, and this little movie has a wide array of queer kids in it.

7 - Make The Yuletide Gay (2009)

This was the first queer film I ever watched that had a happy ending that was also a comedy. Prior to this, I think I had watched Beautiful Thing (1996), Edge of Seventeen (1998), Get Real (1998), and Bent (1997). Most of those films ended resolved or sad. Yuletide is a silly little gay film of almost nonstop innuendo about a guy who goes back into the closet when he returns home for Christmas, but hijinks ensue when his boyfriend shows up unexpectedly. It’s an annual watch for me around the holidays, and I usually host people for it. 

Also, Adamo Ruggiero is in it! He played Marco on Degrassi: The Next Generation.

This was fun! I think most folks have been tagged that I know, but I’ll tag @warningtothecurious​. If anyone else does this, please tag me back if you do this! I want to know what films you all return to.

#tag meme #comfort films #shelter 2007 #make the yuletide gay #big eden #the blues brothers #camp 2003 #clue 1985 #master and commander #Ben watches #ben writes

[waitmyturtles]

THE MORNING AFTER: ONLY FRIENDS, EPISODE 4 (“UHHH, IF I FEEL SOMETHING, DOES IT MEAN I HAVE FEELINGS, WOMP?”) EDITION

That’s how I felt after watching yesterday’s episode. I have NO BUSINESS writing meta in my current life-mental state, but I NEED to get a few words down. Just some list-y thoughts.

Shit’s starting to gel for me. The cast seems like they’ve warmed up to each other by way of actor-ly chemistry. (I know scenes are never shot in order, but there was maybe a little stiffness I felt at the start of the series? At this point, it might just be Lookjun carrying that, but I also don’t think she does “drunk” as well as the others.)

Such good meta that sustained me during my packing yesterday. @ranchthoughts on an ephemerality BREAKDOWN. @respectthepetty Senpai on sluts slutting — and HOW WE AUTOMATICALLY JUDGE AND LABEL SLUTS FOR SLUTTING (more on this in a BIT — go OFF, RTP Senpai). And @slayerkitty on nailing the narrative frameworks, which really struck me this episode, and this goes back to ephemerality again. Can’t believe I’m gonna meta, but let’s boogie, ‘cause I gotta.

@ranchthoughts — Ranch, I’m probably going to repeat some of what you wrote, so please forgive my stress-addled brain. I just lost it at Khaotung this episode, I thought he was just OVERFLOWING with BEST-NESS this episode — and the way we lived with Ray in his past in this episode. It was another play on time. And I love that @slayerkitty nailed that it was the flashbacks that were doing the talking this episode — because especially for Ray, the past is doing HIS talking. His mother didn’t love him in his past. Therefore, because of his past, he is unlovable in his present. (Interrrrgenerationalllll traumaaaa — the past affects your present. The opposite of ephemerality. That shit’ll STICK with you UNTIL you decide to face it head-on, like our beloved PatPran.)

Ooooh, baby. Gosh. The combination of the use of flashbacks, with Ray living in his past, only listening to music his parents listened to. And Sand — falling for Ray! — is holding Ray’s hand and bringing him to the present and the new. Sand’s a figure of change. Ray keeps toeing BACK to the past, to his memories, to his “love” for Mew, and Sand’s like, let me hold you down. (Ray going back and forth — like relapsing.) Ray STILL flashing back to Mew, holding that pendant (THAT LOOKS AN AWFUL LIKE AN ECLIPSE SYMBOL, AMIRITE AMIRITE) — and flashes again back and forward to the record store, where Sand found Ray’s hand.

What will Ray need for Sand to do to pull Ray even closer to the real-time present? How will Sand help Ray face his trauma? Will Sand really hold Ray down?

I am a big believer in the ships sinking, but goddamnit, First and Khao ATE this episode. GAAAHHHH.

Just musing: If Jojo and team started out this series having us think on ephemerality, the general lack of accountability, and the disappearance of time — are we entering the next act of the series where the characters grapple with the impacts of their pasts? That if you’re engaged emotionally and/or sexually with others, that not being accountable for your past and present is NOT an option? (That’s a kind of frame that speaks very closely to Jojo’s devotion to messages of sexual health in his past shows — especially regarding Nat in Gay OK Bangkok, who was HIV positive.)

Also musing: I saw some posts on my dash grappling with Top and Ray using coke. Drug use is obviously common on the partying circuit — their using coke doesn’t surprise me, especially considering that Top and Ray were both shown also being familiar with pills earlier. But I will note that the entire SE Asian region prosecutes the drug trade quite harshly, so to be honest, I was surprised to see Top actually snorting (but not surprised that that would be in a Jojo show). (Some passing links: when I Googled “drug use in Thailand,” this study shows that of a sample of vocational students in Thailand, LGBTQ+ students were more likely to use three or more drugs than heterosexual students, plus more findings. And this article briefly reviews the history of drug prosecution in Thailand.)

Also musing: really loved how Top’s demeanor was SO different with Nick and Sand. Maybe this indicates how much he’s “controlling” himself around Mew (@ranchthoughts , beep beep, control). Especially when Nick was talking with Top — it seemed like Top had been approached for money like this before. And the way he was so forward with Sand, confident to tell Sand that Sand wasn’t up for keeping Boeing — that was a totally different Top than who we see with Mew.

Okay, penultimate point. @respectthepetty says: sluts gonna slut. @bengiyo says: dudes gonna dude.

Cheum calls Boston a ho. Top says Boston is nasty. Nick calls himself nasty. Nick is Boston’s “favorite.” Jojo challenges the viewer to think that Top was gonna sleep with Beam, as RTP Senpai writes. Top’s already slept with Boston while dating Mew. On and on and on.

I wrote in my review of Theory of Love that I related to Khai, and now I relate somewhat to Top by the way that some of the viewership has judged Top. I was VERY often called the slut/ho of my friend groups in my younger years. OFTEN. And this was while I was in my twenties, exploring myself, my boundaries, my sexuality, all of it.

I relate to the struggle of trying to shed labels. Ray is a “burden.” Boston is “nasty.” Mew wants the truth from Top as to if Top has been with anyone else while they were dating. Therefore — Mew is assuming that Top IS sleeping with other people.

Call these people by their labels, and they’ll start believing them. It’s just another kind of trauma, similar to intergenerational trauma.

I wrote in my Theory of Love piece that as a global society — humans don’t really believe that our fellow humans can CHANGE. We don’t accept change well. (Cancel culture rarely allows for someone to be uncancelled — right?) If someone takes on a label — we tend to believe that label, and we have a hard time believing that someone has SHED that label after time. If Ray was called a burden by his mother — what work will it take for Ray to shed that label? And same for our sexually active guys, too.

Think about how you talk about your friends to others. Think about if you use labels to talk about them. Think about how old those labels are, and if they’re accurate in the present. And. Think about how you judge others by their pasts. (“Remember when so-and-so was sleeping around?”) Think about whether or not you use the past to judge and/or justify your FEELINGS about someone.

Now, I don’t even KNOW if these guys WANT to change these paradigms. We get the SLIGHTEST hint that maybe Boston wants to do so with Nick in next week’s preview.

But. I just fucking love that Jojo is playing around with this. If someone is HIV positive — that’s a label, a stigma. If someone is a ho — that’s a label, a stigma.

These dudes are burdened by what everyone else is thinking and saying about them.

And we have Sand, on the other hand, processing his feelings with Nick. We have Nick acting like a damn BASKETCASE, but at least he admitted the wiretapping to Sand (??? lol honey but you gotta stop this now, nervous giggles, put Boston’s phone down). We didn’t see Yo in this episode, but we know Yo believes in accountability.

There’s something about the Ray-Mew-Cheum-Boston friend group that allows things to both slide and fester. We’ll get ever more clarity in the following episodes on this, but — these young folks are having ish dealing with their labels, the labels of their pasts, and what are they gonna do in their presents and futures to deal with changing themselves?

FINALLY, and then I’m done rambling. Is that supposed to be a penis, or something penis-like?!

(What’s good, Ephemerality Squad? Wish me luck with moving today! @slayerkitty @ranchthoughts @lurkingshan @neuroticbookworm @clara-maybe-ontheroad @twig-tea @distant-screaming @chickenstrangers)

#only friends #only friends the series #only friends meta #raysand #khaotung thanawat #first kanaphan #firstkhao #ray x sand #sand x ray #forcebook #topmew #mewtop #is it mewtop or topmew? lol #top x mew #mew x top #force jiratchapong #book kasidet #neomark #nick x boston #boston x nick #neo trai #mark pakin #lookjun bhasidi #only friends the morning after