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#don’t listen to me

I’m bored during quarantine, so here’s another hot take no one is gonna read.

I don’t give a shit about people wearing merch for bands they don’t actually listen to. As long as they’re not claiming to be a fan or part of the scene, I don’t see the issue. Plus band shirts are usually really comfy, and in some place (like where I live) really easy to find in thrift stores.

This “name five songs” bs is also usually targeted at young girls bc “they’re obviously wearing it for attention” when boys do it too, but aren’t interrogated.

Stop whining “I thought I was gonna make a friend, but no” bc you still can. Instead of being a dick & discouraging them from ever interacting w/ the scene, maybe just be nice & suggest some songs “bc the band on your shirt is really cool, you should check them out”. Now you’ve potentially sparked someone’s interest in the scene, & made that new friend you were pissing a fit about.

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i KNOW no one cares but i keep having intense flashbacks to my childhood but there was literally nothing better to me than my cousin and i walking down to the dollar general and buying journals, gel pens, and gum and then making complex forts to write in our new diaries

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I want to fall in love

I’m still sick, so I’ve stayed at home and have kept overthinking

and that idiom made me think about what love actually is because I think that is really like falling, I mean, you know somebody and then you just think about that person and blush and literally fall in that person, drown in them

as I said before I’m in my teens and I’ve never felt love in romantic way

but I seriously wanna fell in love with somebody, who would be good person, nobody special for society, but someone, that would be the greatest for me

okay, I dunno nothing about live and love, but I don’t wanna study history and geography, so I have a little too much time for thinking

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It might be because I’m old and jaded, but I’m feeling like love is transactional.


I feel like people only “love” you to the extent that you can provide something for them; people love you inasmuch as you serve the purpose they have for you, and I don’t mean that the way you think I do. I don’t mean “I’ll be nice to him if he buys me a _______”, I mean “he takes care of me so I love him.”

That’s a transaction.

People aren’t loved for who they are, they are loved for what they do. If they stop doing it, we stop loving.

I’m not even trying to say it shouldn’t be that way, I’m just working out this thought.


Even parents love their children conditionally: your kid grows up to be a loser who smokes weed and sleeps on the sofa all day, will you love him? He grows up to be gay, will you love him? What if he doesn’t believe in the religion you do? What if he doesn’t love you?


I guess that’s why older people “fall in love” less.

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zaphodText

Since I’m not well, I spent morning in the bed watching BTS V-live. I liked it very much, everything went smoothly, much fun etc. And now I see people freaking out about this “dangshin” jikook moment . Why always something happens with this two… Give me more others ship’s awkward moment with a ambiguous lines meanings, long stares, low key kicking asses during interviews and whatever… I demand it. Why is it always This Two… Not fair. I need a rest and I’m not fucking kidding

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