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#don't fucking come here lol
inkskinned · 2 months ago
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tbh for a long time i really resented the advice "pick a partner that you would want to raise kids with" because i don't want kids and i hated that all relationships had to come from this place of procreation-first. what about toxic friendships, after all.
it took me a really long time to realize it's a bastardization of good advice.
many of us are recovering from being raised by parents/caregivers that were in toxic relationships or were toxic themselves. we learned behaviors, thoughts, and patterns from these people, and we spend our adult lives untangling and dismantling the harm done to us.
the advice should be - is this the person you'd want a child to emulate? is this a person you'd want a child even around? is this a person you can trust alone with a kid - any kid, mind you - and know that the child is safe, looked after, loved? is the relationship you're in one you'd want children to see and repeat in their adult lives? or is the relationship one you hope they won't follow, after all?
to be honest, i knew when i was in a bad relationship. i'd tell people - i know, i know, i should break up with him. i know, i know. she's not actually a good friend. but the reality was that it's incredibly difficult to escape the-devil-you-know. it was easy enough to train myself to be okay with it; i have very little regard for the-self and the process of cutting people out was simply too threatening for my mental state.
but i wouldn't put a younger version of myself through the same thing. i'd picture her in the same situation. i would tell her, broody as she is - leave, you're happier outside of it, never let anyone talk to you like that, you're worth more than this. i'd tell her when you let him cross your boundaries, the fault is his, but you need to understand you're rewarding bad behavior if you don't do something about it. i would wish, fervently, i could restart the relationship and do it all differently, be-young-again.
and then i realized: i am the younger version of myself. a future version of myself is begging me to leave. to take my happiness seriously. i am a kid to fifty-year-old-me. and i need to take my own advice. it's okay if that sets me up to grieve.
pick a partner that you would trust a younger version of yourself with. pick friends you'd want your younger self to grow up alongside. pick love that makes you feel like you want everyone to experience in their life and feel with others, something magical and shareable and full of mist. pick a love that feels like you can grow in it. pick a love like: i will be proud of this.
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gorska · a month ago
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Witchcraft in Bosnia - Saljevanje straha (strave) Saljevanje strahe (strave/staha) is a ritual practiced by Bosnian Muslims (though the ritual can be found in Christians as well) intended to chase a "fear" from a person's heart. It is said to help with ailments that cannot be treated by traditional medicine and is usually preformed by an older woman. It can be anything from stuttering, anxiety, to nightmares and insomnia.
The face of the person who is having their fears removed is covered with a red cloth. A cup with water is held above their head and a piece of warmed up lead is thrown in the water. This is repeated with the cup of water held next to the person's heart and feet. The lead is then taken out and the shapes are read to discover the reason of the person's fear. The lead is then instructed to thrown into a body of flowing water such as a stream or a river.
Despite being incorporated in the current religious practice it is of pre-Islamic/Christian roots. This ritual is problematic within the Muslim community due to the fact that it uses excerpts from the Koran ( Ihlas, Felek and Nas) as well as chants such as (“Bježi stravo iz glave”, “Hajde uroci niz potoci”, “Salij da ga nije”) as well as instructing the person suffering from ailment to wash themselves with the water in an order opposite to the one used in Islamic ritual washing. Because of this it is considered witchcraft and not part of the official religious canon.
One of the problematic aspects of this practice is the fact that it uses led which can lead to lead poisoning if the person drinks the water.
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relighthatspark · a month ago
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i just wanna keep calling your name until you come back home
("i don't wanna live forever" - zayn & taylor swift) (x)
#willex#julie and the phantoms#jatpedit#jatp#if u follow me here u get amazing things such as: the EXACT SAME POST I MADE FOR ANOTHER SHIP ON MY GLEE BLOG 😍🥰#these are handwritten btwww which is why the letters r so fuckin SHAKYYYY 😚#lol but like this lyric apparently just fucking making me feel all the fucking ship angst alkshdgakjdhfkfaslj#yo i was never like super into this song but now that i'm reading the lyrics just sdkhgdslajlgkjsf someone...#write a willex fic based on idwlf??? 👀 jk lol unless 🤪#no but hhhhh 'i don't wanna live forever cause i know i'll be living in vain'#'i just wanna keep calling ur name until u come back home'#'it's just a cruel existence like it's no point hoping at all'#'i've been looking sad in all the nicest places / i see u around in all these empty faces'#IDK IF IT'S A FIC I'VE READ OR JUST FANON IN GENERAL BUT THIS IS GIVING ME MAJOR FUCKING WILLEX VIBES how have i not realized beforeeeeee#willie jatp#alex mercer#mine#taylor swift#see idk if the tags at the front works so we do some at the beginning some at the end i guess 😂🤪#willie#alex#also sorry for the kinda weird gradient in the last one ksdhgaksdf both alex's shoulder and reggie's face are kinda weirdly faded in lol#ugh this song fits them so well but i really think it's fanon/fic vibes bc i can't find a lyric that would work as the caption 😂#like in the canon context lol#also (ahh these tags are so long lmfao rip) owen's fucking face in the last one#*presents my broken heart in my hands* pay for this sir#my art
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wanderingbandurria · 5 months ago
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#3 for wolfstar? (if u haven't done it, I'm new and still need to get through ur whole blog twice before I know what's up, lol) thx! <33
Hi Nonnie and welcome!! I haven’t done 3: Nose kiss, so thank you for leaving this prompt! Lol yeah I got an unexpected amount of prompts, which is fantastic since this has been tons of fun and I really wanted to focus on developing my skills to build up to kisses! I think I should have used a tag for these fics but honestly, I wasn’t expecting more than two or three prompts. You are all amazing.
(And honestly, I hope everyone knows I normally don’t write this much/this fast but next weekend I start a new job so I might as well make the most of the writing time I have now)
With that being said, I hope you like this kiss! I think this is going to be the last one for today, so I hope it’s decent! There’s an absurdly cheesy joke here at the end. I hope you enjoy it!
As everything posted for this, this is unbeta’ed! please forgive my English!
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“Look at this mess,” Sirius says sternly as he hangs his cloak on the kitchen’s chair. He frowns for about two seconds before starting to laugh heartedly. 
Harry runs to him, yelling “Padfoot!” and throwing himself at Sirius’ arms.
Sirius picks him up on the run, his fancy black robes smudging with white. He turns in place until Harry is laughing too.
“Hey, Harry. What you two have been up to?” he asks, and Harry scrunches his nose adorably and shows his doughy hands, wiggling his fingers.
“We were baking!” Harry answers and then starts wiggling until Sirius puts him back down on the floor.
“I see that,” and Sirius whistles appreciatively, eyeing the kitchen counters covered with every kitchen utensil they own. Every spoon, fork, knife and plate they own is in the sink. There’s cake mix on the floor, on the ceiling, and on the hair on the back of Remus’ head. Eggshells lie on the counter like abandoned cars in an apocalypse, and the light blue walls have been redecorated with splatters of pink, purple and white. 
Remus looks over his shoulder and gives Sirius a luminous grin that makes Sirius’ daily fatigue almost disappear. Remus is crouched on the floor, looking into the oven. Harry walks back to his side, throwing himself to lay on the floor by his side, his head on his hands and his small feet tapping up and down the floor.
“Is it ready, Moony?” Harry asks, accommodating his glasses on his nose, leaving them half-covered with the mix, half-covered with fingermarks. 
“Not yet, Harry. Why don’t you keep an eye on it for me? You can let me know when the circle on the top turns brown,” Remus says standing up. He passes his hands half-heartedly over his trousers and apron, but they are all covered in flour, so in the end, he sighs and leaves it like that. 
Harry nods solemnly, his eyes fixed on the small glass door. 
Remus turns to smile at Sirius. Sirius smiles back.
“Do you remember the kitchen safety rules, Harry?” Remus asks then, as an afterthought, turning to look down at Harry.
“Hmmm?” Harry says, his feet going tap, tap, tap against the floor.
“Kitchen rules, Harry. Look at me,” and Harry does, looking over his shoulder, green eyes bright and attentive. “Not touching the oven’s door. Calling one of us if you see fire. If something bubbles or spills, you don’t try to fix it on your own, but you wait for one of us to come.”
Harry nods and goes back to look into the oven.
Remus sighs again and shakes his head, but then turns, walking towards Sirius.
“Hey,” he says with a big smile when he gets closer. He looks so young and domestic that Sirius’ heart does a weird somersault.
Hey, you,” Sirius says, and then he laughs. “You have a bit of flour there,” he says, making an encompassing movement with his hand over Remus’ face, and Remus snorts.
“Yeah, I think some of it even got under my pants,” he says with a grin. “Can you watch Haz as I go to change?” he asks, once again batting at his trousers.
“Sure,” Sirius says with a nod. Remus smiles again and starts to walk towards the bedroom. He doesn’t get too far, because as he walks by Sirius, he softly grabs his arm to stop him. Remus turns, and Sirius ducks to leave a kiss on his nose, short and sweet.
“The only place that’s not covered in flour,” Sirius says with a grin, as he moves his hand up and down Remus’ arm.
Remus laughs and looks back at him, fondly. 
“Oh, shush, like you mind me being all dirty,” he answers in a low, soft tone. His eyes are bright and full of mischief as he grabs Sirius’ robes to pull him into a proper kiss.
Send me a kiss from this list and I’ll write a short scene!
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heybeybey · 5 months ago
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This is pretty niche so feel free to ignore but I really can't get the thought of Maria Clara! Petra out my mind
(but... maybe the badass, I-won't-take-any-of-your-shit type 😭 girl can probably man a rifle shoot me pls petra ral)
I just want to see Petra in a baro't saya* ok even tho she doesn't look Asian at all.
and of course she fucks her grumpy Katipunero* boyfriend even tho she'll probs get judged for it.
"lol modesty? being a dalagang pilipina*?
fuck society's rules.
i'm gonna sleep with my handsome duwende* before he leaves to fight against the colonizers"
- Petra Ral, probably. circa 1861
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Art by Peng-Peng on Deviantart
^she can totally kill with that big-ass fan i don't make the rules
I MEAN LOOK ME IN THE EYE AND TELL ME THIS 👇 DOESN'T FIT PETRA FUCKING RAL.
"Ready to fight for my country's independence but MAKE IT CUTE":
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Art by Ellieknorcubes (ellie) on Behance
Katipunero - a rebel member of the KKK, which was a Philippine revolutionary society that fought for PH independence
Dalagang Pilipina - translates to "Young Filipina lady" but it's usually used to refer to a Filipina woman who's shy, reserved, prim and proper.
Baro't saya - translates to "blouse and skirt". traditional Filipino clothing
Duwende - Levi Ackerman a dwarf/elf
Laban (in the 2nd photo) - translates to "fight"
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lepetitchemin · 2 months ago
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gwen..is a much stronger person than i will ever be
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her man just DUMPED her (in such a detached and apathetic way???) and what does she do? she tells him to get his shit together and remember the person he is. 
she immediately knows that he doesn’t mean anything he’s saying (but it still hurts like a bitch!!!) and it’s like she knows that this is a moment of weakness for him, and that he’ll come back to her.
#i knew you'd come back to meeeeee..and you'd come back.......!!!!!!!!#for real though how is she this well-spoken and respectful and assertive and firm after he just shattered her heart into a million pieces#even in her MOST VULNERABLE moments she is still this good and wise and kind and she still challenges him to be his best self#she's like bby..this ain't it lol idk who the fuck i'm talking to rn but it isn't the person i fell in love with pls grow a spine <3#i feel like my caption is trash i just don't know how to convey how much she blows my mind in this scene in just a few words#she's literally like 'you're your own person and you're a GOOD person and the only way you'll be a good ruler is if you actually make up#your own fucking mind instead of just doing what you're told <3'#'also this is clearly a mistake and i'm deeply disappointed in you but like i'll always love you and here's why'#like how does she do it how is she like this#i love her#and i'm so mad at arthur in this ep jesus fucking christ#no one come for me i know he's grieving and he's Not okay AND he's hurting people and causing sm damage that has lifelong consequences rip#merlin#bbc merlin#merlin screencaps#gwen pendragon#arthur pendragon#arwen#argwen#arthur x gwen#merlin season 4 ep 5#merlin season 4#his father's son#i'm a fool and i never paid attention to this episode title or if i did i forgot#i'm..i need to sit down need to process FUCK ingenious i love it i hate it i'm emotional !!!!!!!!#maybe i should have just put the caption in the tags rip it's so jumbled ok goodbye <3#c’est moi
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abombihoney · a month ago
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Hi I'm not dead!
Chapter 7 is up.
(Sorry about the delay.)
you don't have to apologize! what you do or dont do is totally up to you!
That said, is the narrator omniscient or third person limited? im too lazy to check the other chapters to look but it super looks like maki has crush on muze lol
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kuiinncedes · a day ago
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well that's the word count
#heard by my dorm neighbors as i talk to myself writing this essay alkshgjf#idk if they can hear me ... maybe like a slight mumble of sound bc i think i can kinda hear them talking sometimes#not me just talking to myself lol but anyway#i mean i always talk to myself lmao#but yeah that's the word count XD sooooo that's the essayyyy lmao#there is one aspect i'm completely missing but it's bc i have literally no idea what it means#and the teacher hasn't respondedddddd to my emaillllllll#that i sent yesterday and i'm gonna follow up with tonight probably#lkashdfgjakslgljkdhj but there we go#ready for class tomorrow where i'm gonna give my classmates an essay talking about my position in an online community#as a fan of gLEE#lmao fun times i do think this might be a little ... more fun to read than my last essay tho which was Very Academic#here... i'm clearly talking about something i actually really love so i think it sounds a little more natural#was this a mistake lmao thinking about having to have people peer review and give me feedbackkkkkk :D laksjkghlsdfj#it's fine i'm pretty unapologetic about my obsessions tbh#as u can see by my too many stickers lol#i won't like shove it in ur face or bring it up randomly necessarily... but if it comes up i don't think i'd shy away from being like#i'm a fucking gIeek#i've already told a couple people like just in regular icebreaking convo of like what shows do u like and stuff#i'm like well...... j/atp first then maybe i'll say glee lolll#anyway finished pretty much right on time i'm gonna meet friends for dinner soon and we're gonna go to glowstick club bowlingggg lol#jeanne talks
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calpicowater · a month ago
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Week 34/52: August 23rd - August 29th 2021 | Hydrangeas in Abbotsford
Monday to Wednesday were my days off this week. I was still trying to recover from my vaccine on M/T so I just stayed up and watched drama (我的小确幸 A Little Happiness) to my heart’s content. Went to see bb on Wednesday! We watched pranks and WongFu together on youtube~ I bought this plum gummy candy from T&T for 99 cents to try and it was very strong plum but yum!!! Would like to try again. I just really love gummy candy. I went to work Thursday to Saturday. We were told to bring props and my coworker Diana and I brought the same thing (instant noodles) LMAO. It was unplanned af LOL just Asian things, I guess. Didn’t even end up using the props at all so not sure what the point of that was but at least we got this friendship photo together lmfao. 
I am so exhausted lol. The commute is so tiring. I want free time...
#365#52#ootd#i usually leave the depressing thoughts to twitter but i feel more comfortable ranting here today if thats ok#i genuinely cannot remember the last time i felt like i had a future... maybe in early high school years#what i mean is that for the past 8-9 years i always live as if i will die next year so i would never plan for my life beyond the 1 year mark#die doesn't always mean su*cide although that feels like an option sometimes#but some days i feel so horrible abt being alive i just want to go and i've felt like this for over a decade#and especially during the past 8 years it's been extra bad... so even if su*cide doesn't end up killing me#sometimes i feel like i am so fucking depressed i feel like it's going to kill me anyways one way or another#mental health and physical health go hand in hand and ever since i started dealing with extreme mental illness my physical health has been#deteriorating slowly... from irregular heartbeats to severe insomnia and often feeling motion sickness or general nausea from doing nothing#sometimes it feels like it's only a matter of days before a chronic physical illness hits me and i leave this world for good#i just don't know. i wish i could have a life and have a future but i cannot think beyond that#i just want to live my best right now. i just want to live as well as i can right now and think about the rest when it comes... if it comes#it's just so fucking hard and idk anything lol i just wish the suffering would end and i could be happy for once#haven't felt it in so long so idek what it is#anyway if u don't deal with mental illness consider yourself the luckiest person ever#also please do not tell me to go see a therapist#i am a psych grad i am aware of the research and i have my own reasons why i do not see one#thanks for reading all of this lol#not asking for anyone to feel bad for me tbh i am so used to just crying alone in my room by myself#been doing this for a decade i'm so used to it by now#maybe one day i will live until i am grown up and maybe one day i will have a life and live normally whatever that means#and i look forward to that day bc it means that i've beat it#and if that day doesn't come or if my time on earth ends soon then thats fine too#either way i've tried by best 我尽力了#BE or HE it's all good... i am merely a speck of dust in the grand scheme of things#happy or sad... depressed or not... at the end of the day it really does not fucking matter#but i would do anything to be mentally healthy
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livingprophecy · 2 months ago
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//
#rant about mental health following i just wanna dump this#and then go to bed#i really have been having these mood wings that are absolutely insane recently#swings**#and my psychiatrist wanted to look at bipolar but i think it might be bpd#i just don't know how to bring it up in a way that doesn't sound like i've been taking online quizzes and shit lol#but regardless like. i've felt really shitty on here about being a multi sometimes#and i know that if i was a solo blog more people would follow me#and i wouldn't feel so weird about joining verses or groups or things like that but that's a whole separate thing#i think i'm just feeling really gross atm and i've been on a bit of a decline since my dad pulled some shit#which i won't get into on here more bc it could be really triggering and it certainly was for me LKASDFNLASJDF#i just. nalkdjfklandf idk i really don't know if a diagnosis would help or if there's stronger meds i can go on i just hate that#i feel so fucking empty sometimes? and i wanna make that feeling stop#i'm okay i think like you don't have to worry about me and i'm not gonna do anything harmful i just wish i could have#conversations and stuff without thinking people hate me or convincing myself i've done so much wrong#anyways idk where this is coming from i just wanna put it down and then delete it so i can feel better#&.   𝐎𝐔𝐓 𝐎𝐅 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐀𝐂𝐓𝐄𝐑   )   i begin to realize my only enemy is me.#negativity /#negativity tw /#mental health tw /
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