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#don't let me start with the crap about lust is the same as love to kagami
countrymusiclover · 1 year
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16 - Children Can Be A Pain
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Part 17
A God Worthy Soulmate
@queenieala
A few days later
I was standing out on the balcony from Ken's chambers staring into space consumed in my own thoughts. A few days had passed since the visit to the city and things had been tense.
Ken had been gone for days and was nowhere to be found, " Must be bedding some beautiful woman, probably it's not like I can satisfy him though I hoped I could but I can't. I'm not some goddess or some lovely lady I'm just a nobody and always would be one ``I thought.
It wasn't like I wanted to see him either. He clearly doesn't give a crap about his people. So why in the world would he care about someone like me. Lizzie may have had the right idea all along. It might just be best if I went home instead.
But if I did, Lizzie and the rest of the school would be in danger… I promised him I would stay for a month and it was soon coming close to the mark.
I continue to get lost in my thoughts not noticing a pair of hands wrapped against my waist. Until whoever it was whispered in my ear. "I've missed you." I recognized it as Ken and it made me make my hands into fists in anger.
" Yes, you sure mean it by leaving me here alone for days " I barked, pushing myself from his grip and walked past him stepping inside the room.
" I'm sorry, my love " Ken signed.
" So, tell me have you've gotten any new lovers lately, or brought any new woman into your bed? " I teased.
" What, no I told you there is no one else ? " Ken exclaimed.
" Huh, is that so I'm just surprised I assumed since I didn't satisfy an Almighty powerful god like yourself would hunt for a woman that perhaps you already did " I chuckled sarcastically.
" I haven't touched any woman but you. '' He states, causing me to blush a bit but I regain my composure.
" Honestly, I couldn't care less if you did, I'm not really the type of girl made for this so maybe you should find someone more else that can be, someone more beautiful and glorious like you " I added closing my eyes thinking how foolish I was to think I was cut out for this.
He pulled away, allowing me to turn around in his embrace. "Clarisse, you are all of those things. Do you still not trust my word?"
"It's hard to believe anything you tell me. Especially when you don't seem to put the same effort towards your people that you do for me." I spat towards him.
" Clari, it's complicated " He mumbled.
" How so? " I questioned.
" It just is, " Ken exclaimed.
" Can't you at least try to talk to them or support them? " I asked.
" If that is what you want I will " Ken said.
" No, I want you to do it because you want to not because I want you to " I exclaimed.
" I'll try " Ken mumbled and soon pressed his lips against mine.
He leans into the kiss wrapping his arms around my waist tugging me closer to him. The kiss slowly got passionate where I wrapped my arms around his neck deepening it.
" I want you, " I whispered, staring at him in lust.
"I'm not gonna touch you unless you're sure you're ready ."
" I want you to touch me," I spoke up. My eyes began to glow golden, my werewolf side beginning to come out.
Pulling away from him a little bit I slowly shrugged my shirt over my head dropping it to the floor in a pool at my feet. Watching Ken's eyes looking me up and down slowly.
I placed a hand on the back of my bra clip and slowly started to unclip the straps and threw it across the room before unbuttoning my jeans tugging down my waist let it falling to the ground.
I stood up straight staring at him in confidence not thinking of covering up, " Are you just going to stand there and gawk at me all day? " I said in a seductive tone walking towards him.
I placed my hand on his chest and started to undo the buttons of his shirt.
I began to rub my fingertips up and down his chest while eyeing him out of the corner, noticing his eyes were glowing golden.
"My love, I can't hold back much longer " He warned, trying to keep control.
" It's alright baby, just let go " I encouraged him by weaving one of my hands down his lower region.
He started pulling his shirt off but couldn't resist and crashed his lips onto mine. He grabs my legs when I jump, wrapping them around his waist deepening the kiss.
" Take me to bed, " I whispered.
" As you wish my queen, '' Ken smiled, walking me over to the bed, holding me tightly in his arms before dropping down onto the soft mattress.
He capture my lips against his once more and I placed my legs around his waist and wrapped my arms around his neck.
As we began to get lost in our own passion and pleasure, the door received a knock to it where we broke apart and Ken's eyes turned gold. "You're grace. There is urgent news."
"Go away boy!" He snarled but the door creaked open.
Yanking the covers over myself he looked like he might kill the boy for interrupting us. " I don't wish to be disturbed at the moment I thought I was very clear on that " Ken said his voice thundered loudly.
"I'm sorry sir. But it's about your children. They have been seen at the school."
Glancing from him and back to Ken I was curious to hear the mention. "What about the school. My friends, are they in danger?"
"I'm afraid to say they are inside the school. The rest we don't know." He replied back.
" You lied to me, you promised me you wouldn't harm them " I yelled, pushing him off me and wrapping the cover around me tightly.
I got up from the bed and made my way out of the room not even caring I was bare naked.
" Clari, wait " Ken yelled.
" Your grace, perhaps some proper clothes first would be best " the young boy advised.
" I don't care if I'm naked I have to get to my friends " I exclaimed quickly doing a spell that allows me to have a new change of clothes.
" Clari, wait please " He tried again.
Snapping off at him I waved my finger in his face. "There is nothing you can say. Just go!"
" I did not do this nor did I have acknowledge my children would against my orders " He defended.
I stared at him deeply and soon realized he was indeed telling the truth, " I'm sorry please take me to my friends."
He nodded, lifting me up into his arms and transported us in the air.
Within moments we were in the courtyard of the school, he placed me down onto the ground carefully.
Soon, loud noises began to come from inside the school.
We headed inside and saw destruction everywhere, I spotted Dr. Saltzman was standing there in the hallway frozen so I rushed towards him, surprised that he was just watching. "What are you doing here Clari, you should go now while you can " he said, turning to look at me but his eyes widened in anger when he spotted Ken next to me.
" I see he has fully managed to manipulate you " Dr. Saltzman commented, staring at the god coldly.
" I haven't manipulated anyone, " Ken defended.
" Ah, that's what all tyrants like you would say " Dr. Saltzman hissed.
" Where is everyone? " I asked.
" In the main hall fighting " Dr. Saltzman simply said.
I ran down the hallway and quickly made my way into the main hall where I saw almost the entire squad on the ground bleeding, in front of them a young man with a smirk standing over them holding a sword.
Across the room, Ben was tied up against the wall screaming at his siblings beginning for them to stop, his eyes landing on his boyfriend who was laying on the floor groaning in pain.
" Which one of you wants to die first? I may want to have fun with you all first " The young man chuckled.
"Evander, Just kill them and get it over with all this suspense is boring me " a young woman said, rolling her eyes.
" Little sister, you wounded me, " Evander commented.
" Hey " I yelled making my presence know stepping towards the young man.
" Oh, another one this should be fun " Evander stepped towards me.
" Clarisse, don't " a familiar voice ranged out.
My eyes soon turned to the sound and realized it was Lizzie, my heart stopped for a moment when I saw that my best was in, her face was all bloody and bruised.
" Lizzie " I said tearfully
" You're the bitch that seduced our father " Alvander growled at me.
" Ah, another one of father's mistress I honestly don't see what our father sees in you, you're quite plain, " the young woman snorted at me.
Clutching my hands into fists I transformed into my werewolf form knocking the woman on her back racking my claws down her body until I felt pain shoot through my body. Dropping beside the woman I looked up seeing Hope with her hand raised holding me back. "If you say another thing about her I will tear you apart!"
"Magic can't defeat a god!" The woman growled about to attack until the front door opened and we turned our heads seeing Ken.
He snapped his fingers, freezing everyone in their place slowly walking up towards the one named Alvander flashing the golden eyes. "Explain to me now boy why you came after my mates friends. I did not give you the freedom to allow such treason!"
" Father, I " Alvander tried to explain but nothing came out of his mouth.
" Father, this can't honestly be your mate… she's so plain and so not your type " the young woman exclaimed.
" Watch your mouth daughter " Ken scolded, staring at her coldy causing her to gulp nervously.
" Father, don't tell me you're honestly falling for this bitch here, she is just using you, " Alvander
Ken looked at me still laying on the floor in my werewolf form before turning back to his children. "She is my mate and you will all have to accept that. Now return home once you clean up this mess."
" I'm not some merve servant you can order about father " Alvander spat out.
Ken grabbed his son by the throat looking him deeply in the eyes, mind controlling him. "You will do as I say now!"
" Yes, father, " Alvander answered with no complaints.
Soon the rest of the gods did what their father told them.
" Why are you helping us? " Hope demanded, staring at the god coldy.
" I'm not doing it for you, child, I am doing it for Clarisse nothing more " Ken responded, staring at the Tribird darkly.
I howl at him softly staring at him. He walked over to me running his fingers through my fur watching me wag my tail like a dog. “I took care of it, girl. Once you change back, let me know if you still want to live with me.” Everyone watched the king of gods turn on his heels and leave without another word.
Comments really appreciated ❤️
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cpd-55055 · 2 years
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I have a lot of questions and let me know what you think about it 😊
1.have you been a "Linstead" fan?
2. did you find "Linstead" toxic too?
3.what do you think are your 5 reasons why "Upstead" is better than "Linstead"?
4.do you think are "Burzek" endgame?
5.did you find the "final" 9x22 as boring as I did? 😂 and do you think it only served hailey as a "full circle story"?
6. if a pregnant hailey should come 🙏🏻 do you think they will take the same route as kim did in season 7?
7.do you think that jay and hailey heal each other from the trauma of their past and be their medicine for each other so to speak?
8. do you think jay and hailey are stronger together than individually?
9.when are you expecting a pregnant hailey? and do you think there will be a time jump if she should be pregnant or not?
Thank you for your answers 😀
All the juicy questions, I love it! 💙
Nope! Never have, never will.
To a certain degree, yes. I never saw Jay and Erin being an endgame couple. Their relationship was really one-sided. We only ever saw Erin's troubles and never saw Jay's. Their relationship was pure lust. There was no communication, no trust/honesty. I could go on and on about why I hate Linstead, but in summary, I never saw Linstead to last, even if Erin stayed.
Top 5 Reasons why Upstead is better than Linstead: 1) They communicate. 2) They are honest. 3) They trust each other more than anything. 4) They never give up on each other and their relationship. 5) They are always a team.
I used to think they were, but now I don't think so. Burzek is so messy and complicated that I have officially hopped off that ship. They eventually will end up together, or else the writers wouldn't keep teasing Burzek. It may take another 10 seasons; it may happen in S10. If they end up together, great, I am happy for them. If they decide to just be friends, that's okay as well.
Lol! Yes, the finale was definitely boring. Compared to the S8 finale, it was disappointing. PD usually delivers an intense, jaw-dropping finale. Don't know what happened this year. 🤷🏻‍♀️ 9x22 felt like any other episode. I need a cliffhanger, some angst, and drama. It was also disappointing how they completely brushed over the explosion. Like seriously, Hailey just got blown up, and now she's back at work??? 🤦🏻‍♀️
Hopefully not. I really hope that if they do introduce a pregnancy story for Hailey, it's one with a happy ending. But knowing the writers and how much they love drama, anything is possible. 🤞🏼
Oooohh...I like this analogy. In some way, yes, they are each other's "medicine". Jay had the most change and growth since Hailey became his partner, so it has to make sense that she has some influence in his life.
Absolutely! 1000% Jay and Hailey have screwed up many times in the past, but it has always been when they are alone. Camilla and Angela West were all mistakes Jay made when he was alone. For Hailey, it was Darius Walker, Gael, and Roy Walton, all mistakes when she was without Jay. They balance each other so well. They keep each other grounded and call each other out on their crap. So yes, I do believe Jay and Hailey are stronger together than alone.
From all the foreshadowing we got from S9, I wouldn't be surprised if we got pregnant Hailey sometime in S10. Logically, kids and starting a family is the next step in their relationship. If we don't see it happen in S10, then definitely in S11.
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Rant about shikama doji and hiragis-clan
I don't understand why people say that hiragis are victims from shikama, yes sure they were created from this bastard but still are the same shit as him.
Even if kagami say that are not good or bad characters we should realized that are ones because if that the case then we should justify every damn evil character in anime, manga, novel, movie, serie etc, for the simple fact "it's must be a reason or was for one reason". But kamagi want to redeem hiragis family so bad with mahiru shit and even kureto shit and even (for christ's sake) tenri, that fails completely (don't you think kagami that i didn't see it bcs you always try to portrait mahiru and kureto like poor angels and victim, and that apply to tenri and sheishiro, especially when it cames from mahiru bitch, (and yeah whatever, she is it, i just don’t care anymore)
It's simple hiragis are bad people they have nothing good at all. How they can be victims? What about all the people was in their hands? What are they?
They are incredible selfish people that think are the only ones that have right no matter what. If we are gonna justify that killing people all over again for the reason "is for humankind" is bullshit. It is only to satiate their thirst for power, and that has been seen both in the novel and in the manga, to be more and more powerful.
If the case is "justification" then we can justify shikama doji here too (extreme sarcasm). Shikama lost his precious son right (more sarcasm) so in this case would be..
Shikama doji lost his son so he is doing all of this to revive his death son, so he destroyed the world for that, and killed millions for his selfish goal, poor shikama (bullshit as hell, evil shit). Not evil character bcs he has a reason.
Mahiru she did all what she did to protect shinoa, she didn't have choice to became in demon to the purpose to save the world, used guren and destroyed him in so many possibles ways bcs she loved him so deeply and want to be her strength so he could save the world and killed shinya and the rest was a purpose to save the world, poor mahiru (god more bullshit) (and for let it clear I'm being sarcastic especially with this evil bitch). Not evil character bcs she had a reason.
Kureto he is a man that care for his subordinates and wants to created a world were they live in piece, then he killed them if they disobey him or for experimention and laugh about it, he see guren like a comrade, yet he tortured for days and his father, he care for shinoa, yet he tortured her and then threat her to killed her, kids that he brainwashed them to became soldiers, used in experimentation and like spies with vampires, and say that experiments don't have right, and all of this is just like mahiru is for save the world, poor kureto (don't let me start it again is more bullshit). Not evil character bcs he has a reason.
Shikama doji, Mahiru, Kureto = shitty evil disgusting piece of crap.
And of course I don't forget tenri hiragi and sheishiro are others shit evil disgusting piece of crap as much hiragis's clan is being do it since 1200 years.
Mahiru is not a damn savior, she made genocide and still does, to the simple reason is to "save the world"?, bcs was possessed by two demon Is the excuse? Vampire crap? All of that was just adhere to her thirst for power. Shinoa? She didn't give a crap about her, shinoa is a damn victim from both hiragis (especially from mahiru and shikama doji) and always put her in dangerous situation guren? Where? Bcs she goes just to tortured him knowing that would be trouble from him, even so she didn't care and was manipulating him since 5 and after ten years and more having now 24 to save the damn world? (And this is the most abusive and destructive relationship i've ever seen and without love from both parts, don't talk to me about guren love her is no more than emotional abuse) Shinya that she cared from him, after massacred him bcs she hated him so bad, and the rest even that was a purpose to save the world? ( i dont know at this point if I have to laugh or cry for all the things I've been reading and I can continue, even if kagami in the end put that like a reason, and i wouldn't be surprise if he try to revive mahiru, bcs she was the most innocent victim and the most perfect girl ever).
Like she loved guren the most so she pushed him to become more powerful, even if that means eliminate, his followers, his family and his most precious friends,("elimate your weakness your pathetic attachments bcs that doesn't let you be strong", but he has to be attachment to her lol psycho bitch) which actually was her plan and that not apply in save the world, was just eliminated all what guren loved to have her for herself, (psycho bitch that enjoy the pain she caused to her "most beloved man", don't get me started in how she laughed and enjoyed when his father died and his friends and all was things she hated) because that was her great love for him, to be her strength to face everything that would come and that want of the good things guren had was met her when she was a child, even so she saw all ichinose clan like trash, even guren, people forget that she wants her father goes to them to piss him off (which that means dead flag to them, the worst that could happened to guren was met her like seriously even if saito planned it and helped her to get her revenge still was the worst to guren and goes after someone else for being an insane girl to hurt a sweet child, yeah so sweet and innocent cute girl) And even using shinoa to manipulate others by making them believe that she was always a poor innocent and sweet girl who suffered a lot, and as long as she used shinoa in that it gave her the right to commit genocide and so much garbage that she has done, with the purpose is for a good reason and it is justifiable, such as reading that it was okay to kill Shinya and the others because otherwise tenri would have done it, or that she has a good humanity in her that has done everything she has done to save the world, or that her demonic self was still mess up with her when she turned on in vampire (lmao mahiru always was her true self, she just love power more than anything in the world) and again she is not a savior or is helping guren to keep him alive to give him a reason to live, because guren is not free to live under his terms, but under her terms, is always being like that since the moment he met her; everything in Mahiru is nothing but false in her, false emotions, false feelings, the human mahiru is nothing but a hideous monster, A human monster that want to surprass god but she can't even do every single shit without making every single life misery. (And used saito helps, he gave her what she wanted and even so this other shit said she was crazy since the beginning and was terrible person, so a great genius that made all by herself is not true). kagami doesn't more than blame all in her demons, which in reality she was a rotten child, and a teenager one, she always was greedy and always was about herself no other one, not even guren, or her sister
Kureto is the same as her, he thinks bcs he had a high status can make with people and children whatever he wants, maybe has some sanity,(and has sanity doesn't make someone weak for god's sake and i talk here for guren not kureto) and is not vengative since child like mahiru that was a damn vengative monster since child with the idea to make kill all ichinose clan and a sweet innocent boy where she started to abused and destroy him mentally, emotionally, psychologically and Physically she was and is a psycho. And i understand that no everybody can survive in the world, and are difficult choices to make but killing people to created weapons using children to overpower hiragis that is not even an option, he is an abusive and a tortured bastard still is the same shit and a terrible person.("those who killed without a reason are evil", yeah to overpower you, bcs you are an angel. "Kill me or save me", pathetic bastard)
Hiragis especially mahiru, kureto say that want to make a better world but humans can't do it without breaking any taboo; there must be a price to human to pay, hiragis who is in control, desire for more power to become the greatest.. Doesn't care about destroying the world. How egoistic. Hiragis like demon- self centric. They don't care enough about people around them that is why they say that love, family and friendship is weakness.
That is why all of hiragis are all the same. They seek for power--true power, they want to dominate everything even it if was humankind. They don't really care about human in general, if they can gain more power just from destroying japan, then why not? They can just rebuild it by the power of seraph and make it a better place, with more powerfull human being etc. If its cursed then why they're so greedy, abusive, and manipulative towards others? If they know it was their sins why they don't even try to change your own destiny, but you just follow your own selfish desire and make everyone lifes miserable. How can you rebuild your own idealism about world when you can't even control your greedines for power? I get it ONS world are more like gray area that you can't even know what is right or wrong--but doesnt mean humanity never exist you know. People always blaming guren for everything because he is selfish prick that doesn't want his family to be gone forever, he still a child in heart that never tried to move on from grieving his own family, and destroyed humanity just for his selfishness. Dude, aren't Mika and Yuu are the same? They want their family to still alive, and they want to take revenge for people who have killed their family, while guren? Did he ever tried to seek any revenge on hiiragi's family? He was, but never actually do it in the end and still pitied THEM. @lottenoir
Is incredible how hiragis selfishness can be easy justifies and be poor victims in all of this just because they were created to be used for bastard shikama doji, but I think is so much hipocrasy. (kagami just want to portrait hiragis like victims and it's look like it works at least on the fandom for shikama but their creator is as shitty as mahiru, kureto, tenri and sheishiro and fails so bad in that, he can't even make a descent plot and ruins good characters thank to deal to hiragis shit)
Shikamadoji, mahiru, kureto,tenri, sheishiro= disgusting piece of shit that must be eliminate for good.
Victims (real ones) guren, shinya, shinoa, mito, goshi, sayuri, shigure, and all the people that suffered and died in their hands. (i don't even gonna mention yuu and mika like victims here bcs honestly they aren't either at this point, are the same has hiragis in greedy selfishnes and don't give a crap about the world and people in general)
The hiragis do not have an ideology to protect, nor allies to trust, they see fraternal and family ties as mere tools, hiragis like shikama are pathetic. For them, to survive in that cruel world, nothing is needed but power. Ideals and ideology are just worthless talk.
That is why I see characters (guren, shinya guren's squad) that despite living in a cruel world, know why living, even in a dark world, life goes on, it is not always about becoming the most powerful, and killing to give themselves power, it is about survive, live, is about that they have a mission, things to protect, the ideals of each one, their hopes, those are the ones that make their ideals come true, they sacrifice their lives for others, knowing that many will die on the way, nobody can turn off that last light, in the that those characters believe. (Schwarzesmarken words).
Ons has a Gray Area, they are character that get in there but those characters goes more to be good person with mistakes and flaws. And those characters have belief, values, try to get better and have feels and emotions towards others.
Hiragis and others one (like yuu, mika, shikama, saito,ferid, krul, etc) goes to the area of being bad or evil characters no matter how much kagami try to portrait them or redeem them and is just like that, most of those characters just focus in their damn selfishness crap not other people or the world, and most of the vampires are as shit as hiragis. (don't you think kagami that i don't see how you continue to try so bad to redeem shitty hiragis, with that crap about "the hiragis are not to blame bcs they were created to be used" bulshit as hell, put yourself together man, your plot about them and others characters is horrible, with so many holes and incongruities, but oh well keep going with your poor mahiru, kureto, hiragi family and others, instead to give them justice to the only decent characters that you still have and still ruin, no so many bullshit about "there aren't good or bad characters" keep going to show the bad characters like good ones, and good characters like evil shit lol, what a lie, and you say guren is your fave? Lol poor guren, you not even give justice to him nor shinya, I couldn't even with catastrophe at 16 and your bullshit with mahiru and the others like no one was better than her, not even the other girls, the perfect one and the insignificant others girl,poor the other girls, that can't be as godnees as her, and people in general, oh and your bullshit about guren was weak when actually is not, and has to be in the most destructive and abusive relationship, actually not even was one at all, just emotional abuse, not love, not exs, and it sickness even think about their love with mahiru than didn't do more than abuse a DAMN GOOD MAN like guren and others people and make guren look to everyone like the evil character thanks to her, the most horrible murder, genocide bastard, but no one blame her instead blame guren for all her shit and one can't see guren is being abused from her since child, where is the love? Please give me a break, and thanks to you that keep going with her bullshit guren is the most hate one, and whatever at this point I just don't care anymore is so many stupid things about it and is just sickness and no funny at all)
To hiragis being weak don't let you became strong but can we appreciate this instead all their bullshit..
You're going to meet many people with domineering personalities: the loud, the obnoxious, those that noisily stake their claims in your territory and everywhere else they set foot on. This is the blueprint of a predator. Predators prey on gentleness, peace, calmness, sweetness and any positivity that they sniff out as weakness. Anything that is happy and at peace they mistake for weakness. It's not your job to change these people, but it's your job to show them that your peace and gentleness do not equate to weakness. I have always appeared to be fragile and delicate but the thing is, I am not fragile and I am not delicate. I am very gentle but I can show you that the gentle also possess a poison. I compare myself to silk. People mistake silk to be weak but a silk handkerchief can protect the wearer from a gunshot. There are many people who will want to befriend you if you fit the description of what they think is weak; predators want to have friends that they can dominate over because that makes them feel strong and important. The truth is that predators have no strength and no courage. It is you who are strong, and it is you who has courage. I have lost many a friend over the fact that when they attempt to rip me, they can't. They accuse me of being deceiving; I am not deceiving, I am just made of silk. It is they who are stupid and wrongly take gentleness and fairness for weakness. There are many more predators in this world, so I want you to be made of silk. You are silk. C. JoyBell C. (To guren ichinose and shinya hiragi)
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3desiderium3 · 3 years
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For your love
chapter three - Rotten Wine
[ series masterlist ]
previous chapter | next chapter
pairings : reader x damiano david
story summary : damiano and reader are in very loving relationship that sometimes almost too quickly becomes too toxic for anyone likings
chapter warning (s) : yelling , angst , manipulation , guilt tripping , mind games , toxic behavior , manipulative behavior , strong language
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Saturday morning. Special saturday morning.
Today marks exactly a whole week of Y/N and Damiano not fighting. No yelling , no crying , no sleepless nights , no pushing out of the doorway , no drinking to wash away the sins , no mental damage , no nothing.
Instead of all that , they went on a museum date on Friday , they had a picnic day on Wednesday , Y/N bought him the pearly earrings he has been eyeing on for a while , Damiano made breakfast every day for them , Y/N went out in town to frame some of their pictures they took on their previous vacations . They had a few pamper nights in a row , painting each others nails , putting on face and hair masks and even those weird feet one ! Drinking wine and dancing slowly with some slow music. Damiano singing to Y/N more than 2 times a day.
They made love every night.
It was a dream.
Both of them secretly hoping that this dream won't turn into a nightmare.
Y/N was in kitchen cutting some strawberries for the cake she planned on bringing on tonight's gathering at Victoria's house. Ethan and Thomas where coming as well.
Damiano was still sleeping. Y/N was glowing from happiness and joy. She was so in love with him. She had a smile on her bright shiny face for 7 days in a row , her eyes seemed warmer and more calm , her posture was less tensed and she even smoked less.
While she was busy chopping the reddish fruit under her delicate fingers , the room suddenly felt warmer and creamy cinnamon smell filled it.
Damiano had this weird thing about him that often put Y/Ns mind on wander. It was the way his scent and his aura color changed during his mood swings.
Even if it was not visible to human eye , Y/N swore she could see that dim cloud surrounding his body and changing color in some situations.
His scent was natural , depending on the occasion it was sometimes too strong or it could barely be felt.
When he was happy he was shining deep orange tone with the scent of light cinnamon and lemon ice cream.
When he was sad his color was indigo and he left a strong scent of mint and lime.
When he was angry which is often , he gave of wine crimson vibrations and poisnosly sharp smell of rotten wine.
As for the matter of speaking , when lust would take over him and his senses he smelled sweet like rotting roses and he was gleaming in deep burgundy color.
Just like now he was filling the room with the smell of lemon ice cream and cinnamon.
A pair of slender , sun kissed arms wrapped themselves firmly around Y/N's shoulders and chest .
Damiano's warm , naked chest pressed against Y/N's back pushed her slightly to the edge of the kitchen counter. Closing the gap between her and that cold marble.
His lips found their was to gently kiss the lovely delicate neck of hers. Cracking a sly smile upon seeing some of the soft bruises he left on her neck previous night.
"Morning mio amore." Y/N's lover whispered in her ear. His voice was low , golden , filled with care and adoration.
A huge grin appeared on Y/N's face , turning her head to her left side to kiss Damiano's temple.
"Morning love. It was about time you wake. " His raspy chuckles sent shivers down her spine. " It was , but you have no idea how sad it made me to realize I woke up without you by my side. "
Oh what a sweet talker he was..
"Why don't we go back to bed hmm amore? We have a whole day ahead for us." Damiano nuzzled his face into her neck giving it multiple pecks.
" I need to finish this cake first , after it we can do whatever." " You plan on bringing the strawberry cake tonight?" " Yes.. Why?"
Y/N frowned , she turned around slowly hoping that her boyfriend was playing jokes with her. But he had the same confused expression on his morning face.
" Well... My mom is allergic to strawberries I thought you knew that already?" " Why would your mom be there??"
Damiano stepped back a bit clearly confused.
" Why would she be in her own house? I don't know she is living there I suppose."
Y/N blinked. More than once. Is there some sort of a plan she forgot about? Her mind racing now already , trying to remember all of his family members birthdays and important anniversaries .
" Did you forget the plans we arranged for tonight Y/N?" Damiano asked , now with much more serious tone , his face was not so relaxed and it seemed like the air got thicker and it was harder do breath. The look he gave her was chilling.
' Oh not this shit again.. Are we really going to fight now?? And for what?? '
"I understood that we are going to stay in tonight with Vic and the boys at her place?"
" No. We promised my parents we are going to dine out with them. Did you seriously forgot?!"
He half shouted leaving poor Y/N confused and in slight shock. Why was he getting mad at her for such nonsense? Was he waiting for the right timing just to start an argument?
" I am sorry but I do not remember , you ever telling me that we are seeing your folks. "
" Cause you never fucking listen to me maybe."
He walked over the small coffee table in living room to grab his pack of cigarettes' and a lighter. Taking one in his fingers and placing it between his lips lighting it and taking one long drag. The slow smoke coming out of his nose and hardly parted lips.
" Not just that you never fucking listen but you also never fucking care to remember the important stuff I have! "
Okay what the actual fuck.
Y/N though while her eyes went wide from shock under the furrowed eyebrows and clenched jaw.
This was some sort of a set up. She clearly remember that he never mentioned that to her before.
And both of them knew very fucking well that she would never in her life forget something that's important to him.
" You are obviously pissed at me right now for whatever reason that you have so I will let you be. When you get your shit together you can talk to me. " Y/N said with her head held high.
She was not gonna let him ruin this day. Instead she continued to make her cake. She needed to focus on something else than his deep dark eyes filled with fire from the thrones of hell burning inside of them.
The room smelled like rotten wine.
" What's the problem Damiano. Are you mad at me for not remembering something you never told me?"
He huffed , aggressively shaking ashes off his cig into the ashtray on the coffee table.
" And don't even try ruining my mood , I was perfectly fine before you woke up , I had a wonderful morning thanks for asking. "
" Are you seriously gonna jump on my nerves with that attitude Y/N? "
" That's what you are asking me to do. If you just admit that you forgot to tell me about plans with your parents we are gonna end the day in peace. "
" You are beyond fucking sweet and so beyond fucking dumb if you expect me to stay calm and be in peace with you. You are so ungrateful and so disrespectful towards me . "
Y/N felt like crying , her hands slightly shaking while wiping the fruits into cream . Why now? Why today? Why did he decided to start all this now?
" I am not believing my eyes now , instead of showing me that I am wrong and that you are not ungrateful , you are standing right here and not even bothering to listen what I have to say! "
" I don't wanna hear your crap Damiano! I am trying to maintain the fucking peace in this relationship while you are constantly the one to break it! "
Damiano also felt like crying. Cause Y/N was right. He did forgot to tell her they where invited to go out with their parents , he was in fact mainly responsible for each of their fights. But was he ever going to admit that he is wrong? No.
Instead of trying to process something she is saying to him right now , or trying to apologize , he stood up from the chair he was sitting on , his mouth placed in a smirk , his gaze piercingly cold despite his hot temper.
Damiano walked up to her standing beside her like an annoying child blocking her movements.
" I am sensing slight disobedience in your tone amore.. Now I think we should start again. You are gonna apolo - " " I will certainly not fucking apologize for anything ! Especially not dealing up with your egoistic ass Damiano!"
Y/N was yelling at him. Not able to handle this pressure of rotten wine.
She was tired again. Everything was pale and grey again. She swore that even the sun outside stopped shining. She was tired again from having to deal with a fucking brick wall.
He was just torturing her. For what? His ego.
He was watching her from above , still smirking with his arms crossed . He adored seeing her shake from rage. She was so obedient and so desperate for home peace that she tried doing everything she could to hold herself back.
" You know what Y/N , if you just once , just for once stopped playing a fucking victim then ma- "
" I AM NOT. PLAYING THE FUCKING. VICTIM!"
She screamed. Y/N Y/LN fucking screamed at Damiano David with all the fore she had in her lungs. Inside her ears it was ringing and she didn't realize that she dropped one bowl at the counter , which just provided clacking noises.
Silence.
Complete silence that smelled like rotten wine.
Damiano took whatever he could feel under his fingers which was on Y/N's unfortune a bowl filled with cake whipping cream . He gripped it firmly before smashing it in one stir way right beside her.
Y/N was standing paralyzed her eyes watering and palms visibly shaking. She was watching Damiano straight into his deep dark eyes which showed no emotion.
" Once you accept your place and know your role and once you admit you are fucking wrong ,we can talk properly. " That was all he said as that sly half smile never left the corner of his lips.
He passed her by walking to their bedroom.
No other sounds or words left.
Y/N grabbed the edge of the counter , holding herself steady so she wouldn't fall. Her mind racing. Legs shaking. Heart beating mad.
'So this is the man I wanna marry? The man I want to have family with?'
The one who just throw an heavy object right beside her head?
The one who attacks her for his mistakes?
Her legs finally gave her away. She couldn't stand straight , crying all the tears she never knew she had. Y/N hugged her knees and placed her head temple on them. What a lovely Saturday morning.
She stayed there on the floor crying for at least thirty minutes. With running nose and sobs that turned into whimpers and hiccups.
She regretted ever talking back to him . She should've simply agree that she forgot what she didn't even knew. A few times thinking and trying to remember if by any chance she did forgot about that plan.
But no. She couldn't remember. She lost all hope she had.
When she felt like she could stand again she stood up not quit bothering to clean up the white and beige mess on the floor. She skipped it skillfully directing herself to their bedroom.
'Think about all the times this has happened before , think about all other times when he was guilt tripping you and using you to water up his garden of ego. '
Y/N entered their shared room where her lover was in. Laying on his back on a bed surrounded by soft cloudy cotton sheets. His arms and hands behind his head . His eyes looking her up and down with a cold expression while behind them a fire from the throne of hell was burning.
The room stopped smelling like rotten wine.
It was smelling very little like the mint and lime.
Slow raindrops hitting the huge windows gently , the sky changed from golden to silver.
" I-I am sorry.. Plea-ase don't be m-mad at me.. " She managed to choke out this apology.
Wishing that she was the one hearing it.
Wishing she didn't have to pray away his sins.
He tapped the place for her to lay beside him.
He made her a bed of thorns. In which this gentle rose was supposed to blossom.
" Ti amo amore mio . "
Oh that silly word she always get instead of apology. Like it would fix something.
She laid down beside him , placing her head on his chest , her left leg in between his and her left arm around his torso.
One of his hands playing with her hair while the other caressed her arm.
His eyes becoming glassy as bitter drops of shame and regret left them.
Both of these lovers crying in each others arms purposely. Eager to be taken care of.
And not being able to stay on the calm shore cause the violence is the only way they know how to love.
237 notes · View notes
julyarchives · 3 years
Text
Complicated || (M)
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→ Pairing: Hui x Fem!Reader
→ Genre: Smut; Exes to Lovers.
→ Words:  3.7K
→ Warnings: Mentions of Alcohol; Spit kink; Choking; F and M receiving Oral; Fingering; Squirting; Power Play; Jealousy.
→ A/n: It took us a little longer to finish this story, but we are so happy with the result, so we promise it is worth the wait! Thank you 🐧 anon for this amazing request! We hope you all like it 💕
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"And who's that?" Hui asked Yanan.
He looked at you across the room, looking like a deer caught in headlights. When you looked in his direction, a bright smile lit up on your face and you waved excitedly.
At first, he was confused, but when you got closer and greeted Yanan with a friendly hug, it all made sense.
"Hui," Yanan called him, but his eyes had never left you. "This is Y/N. She's my best friend"
Hui was well aware that Yanan meant 'don't try any funny business because she's my friend', but he was already hypnotized by you.
"Nice to meet you, Hui." you said, the way his name rolled off your tongue had him shivering, and you didn't miss the way he looked up and down at you.
You smiled at him, and he could just tell there was a little bit of mischief hiding in your sweetness. As for the rest of the night, Hui had made it his mission to make you smile at him as much as he could.
He was just mesmerized by you and used every excuse to have Yanan bringing you along on every night out, and inevitably you became friends. You got along, and hanging out together was way more fun than he first expected, and he grew to actually enjoy your company.
Yanan was constantly on Hui's hair, warning that you were not the type of girl he used to date casually, and would not forgive you if you ruined their friendship, and that's why it took him long to make a move on you.
It was actually you who took the first step, kissing him unexpectedly one night when you two sneaked to the kitchen for snacks while your friends played in the living room. It was a point of no return for both of you, the chemistry was undeniable - Hui knew everything you liked and you knew what to do to drive him mad.
You surprised him by showing that you were not the innocent girl he thought you were, and he was not a no-attachment ladies man Yanan had told you he was. The fact that you became friends first was crucial for the relationship, and it was the reason it lasted fairly long, but it was also the reason that it ended. You both recognized that you two wanted different things and were in different places, and it was best to end things before one of you got hurt.
That, however, did not fix the endless tension between you two.
Inevitably you didn't stop seeing each other, now that you had the same friend circle, and it would always end with one of you snapping at the other.
Tonight was one of those occasions, and you had your mind set on not letting Hui ruin your night. It was a perfectly good party, full of people, all your friends gathered in one of their houses, some acquaintances along enough to make the place full, and the loud music making everyone enjoy themselves.
Hui was there, you had already spotted him, but you were good at pretending he wasn't there, even though you could feel his gaze burning holes in the back of your head, but you just danced your worries away.
Making your way through the crowd, you managed to get to the kitchen and fix yourself a cold drink to cool off.
"Fuck, it's hot in here" you mumbled to yourself, using your free hand to hold your hair.
"Right?" A stranger answered, making your head snap in his direction, and you both chuckled at your reaction "sorry, I didn't mean to startle you."
"It's fine," you laughed. He was tall and had just the most adorkable laugh, and somehow you felt comfortable enough to start a conversation "I'm Y/N"
You reached your hand to him, which he immediately took.
"Shinwon" he leaned closer for you to hear him over the loud music
"Do you wanna dance, Shinwon?" You boldly asked
"Lead the way" he smirked
You gently grabbed his hand, guiding you two back to the packed living room. Getting there was the hardest part, only being able to enjoy his company when you reached the make-do dance floor. You could practically feel an intense stare on your figure as you moved closer to Shinwon but chose to ignore it for now. The new tall handsome man was giving as good as he got, dancing behind you sensually, following your movements. The dance was equally fun and sexy, the new company making it all too exciting for you. You could feel Shinwon's lean muscles behind you and you closed your eyes, moving with him completely. As you two turned and moved on the dance floor, you opened your eyes, feeling Shinwon's hand gripping your waist harder. Too bad you were standing directly into Hui's view, almost as if you did it on purpose. Which you did not but since life wanted that way, why not enjoy it.
The burning tension between you, the mix of annoyance and attraction always made you feel ready to burn him back, so that was enough reason for you to wink and bite your lip at him, grinding back on Shinwon's unsuspecting and welcoming body. You only could keep that up for a few minutes before Shinwon managed to turn you, leaning closer to kindly invite you to the rooms upstairs. It was what you needed to get your mind out of the fuming man sitting across from you, so you nodded with a flirty smile before holding his hand once more and leading the way.
Getting up there was fast and soon enough you were trying every door to check for any room available, giggling to no end when at least three doors were locked. The last door was in sight and you were sure it'd be empty, your hand ready to turn the knob when you heard your name being called. You huffed, watching Hui walking closer to you and Shinwon, the man looking at you confused.
"We need to talk", Hui said as he got close enough, his breathing hard and face a bit red.
"We don't, actually. You see, I'm busy".
"Cut the crap, Y/N. Get lost, man, I seriously need to talk to her".
"Oh no. Shinwon, stay. We have nothing to talk about!". Poor Shinwon was completely confused, looking from you to Hui, his hand slowly slipping away from yours.
"Um, Y/N", Shinwon turned to you, one hand carefully tucking a hair strand behind your ear. "It's okay. You know this won't be good if I stay. Yanan told me this could happen if I ever saw you…"
"What?!", you heard Hui shouting at the same moment you did, you not even sparing him a glance.
"I'll get your number from him and I'll call you, yeah?".
"I'm sorry", you didn't even know if you were mad or sad or even frustrated for being cockblocked by Hui no less.
"It's fine. Keep that room in mind, we may use sometime", Shinwon winked at you and turned to leave, nodding to Hui as he walked by. Hui didn't even look at him, his stare fixated on you.
You held his gaze for a few seconds before turning around on your heels and entering the room.
"Talk" you demanded, afraid that if you said more you would end up cursing at him.
"What the fuck was that little show downstairs?" He was already talking loudly, stepping into your personal space.
"I was just enjoying myself," you walked around him, bumping on his shoulders purposefully, hearing him sigh in anger. "Minding my own business, you know what that means?"
You grabbed the doorknob to open the door, ready to leave Hui behind to deal with his problems himself, but you had barely opened an inch when you heard his rushed stomps getting closer, and he grabbed your waist, turning you around and slamming your back against the door, getting it to close behind you.
"I highly doubt that winking at me while rubbing yourself against a stranger counts as 'minding your business', Y/N." He leaned closer to you, noses almost bumping, his hand palming the door trapped you against him. He "And I don't think that fucking someone else will make you forget me."
His eyes didn't stray from yours, and your chest was rising up and down fast - you just weren't sure if it was of annoyance or anticipation.
He smirked and leaned back, this time to whisper in your ear, his hot breath tickling your skin
"He can not make you feel good like I do." He nibbled your earlobe just the slightest "you would end up thinking of me"
He planted open mouth kisses along your jaw, small gasps escaping your lips against your will. You just couldn't help but melt under his touch.
"He doesn't know you like I do." He stepped forward, hips pressing against yours. "He doesn't know what a pretty little slut you are"
Hui ended the distance between you harshly, all his lust seeping through a rough desperate kiss. His hand immediately went to your hair, tugging it until it sting, but he knew you loved it. Your body responded to him like a magnet, you just couldn't help yourself but be completely gone for him.
He nibbled your bottom lip, sucking and licking it, humming in satisfaction with the feeling of having you altogether his. He trailed down your neck where he bit on the skin, licking the spot afterward to soothe, marking you as he was claiming you to him. His name started rolling off your tongue involuntarily, moaning every time he found a new spot to mark.
"That's right, baby girl" he whispered "keep doing that"
He cupped one breast with his free hand, squeezing it while he hungrily attacked your lips again. He started rolling his body against yours and you could feel the hard-on in his pants pressing against your clothed core.
He let go of you completely, and you whined at the loss of contact, only to have him hold your hand and walk backward until he reached the bed, where he sat on the edge.
"You know what to do, baby girl." He said in a low voice, and his hooded eyes watched you dropping on your knees in between his spread legs.
You looked deep into his eyes while undoing his belt and jeans, he leaned back, both hands on the mattress to support himself while he watched you. He bucked his hips up just enough for you to put his pants and underwear down, setting his cock free from the constricted clothes.
Your mouth salivated at the sight of his erection hitting his stomach, already leaking pre-cum. You wrapped your hand around it, using your thumb to smear his juices around, and he hissed at the contact, a breathy moan falling from his lips as you started moving your hand up and down slowly.
He reached one hand and grabbed the hair behind your head, making you look at him.
"I don't think you have the right to tease me, baby" he almost growled
"But-" you tried to speak, but he cut you short
"Ah-ah" he shushed, "I think we can find a better use for that smart mouth. Open up"
You sat back on your heels, opening your mouth like he commanded as he leaned over you, the grip on your hair still holding you in place, puckering his lips and you watched as the drool fell out of it, directly into your mouth.
Hui watched you swallow it with a proud smirk. This is something that only Hui could do to you, you thought, and it was just another way for him to claim you as his, and you could not imagine anyone else in this situation with you. It just reminded you how much you discovered about yourself in your innumerous adventures with him, and it was one of the reasons you loved that relationship.
Quickly shaking those thoughts away, you returned your focus to the current situation, as Hui ran his hand through his hair before leaning back, waiting for you to make your move.
You gulped in anticipation, taking his member in hand and waiting no time to take the head into your mouth, swirling your tongue around it and hearing Hui moaning lowly. You jerked him off, twisting your hand loosely around his dick, then hollowing your cheeks to swallow more of him. His hand twisted around your hair and guided your movements, making you bob your head just the way he wanted.
He bucked his hips and his member hit the back of your throat, making you gag, to which he responded with a loud moan, throwing his head back in pleasure. Relaxing and breathing through your nose, you let him deeper inside you as he kept bucking up to meet your movements.
When you were finally getting used to it, he pulled you away abruptly, breathing in heavily and watching you through hooded eyes.
"You were doing so good, baby girl, but I still want to fuck you senseless." He smirked. "And right now you're wearing too many clothes for that to happen. Strip for me"
Hui sat back and watched you follow his commands once again. Your eyes didn't stray from him as you unzipped your dress and let it fall off of you, proceeding by stepping out of your high heels. Once you're finished taking off your underwear, Hui stripped out of his remaining clothes as well.
"Now get on the bed" his voice was stern and his eyes followed you. "Ass up"
You got in the position without questioning, resting your head on a pillow
"Look at that, dripping just from giving me pleasure" he ran a finger through your slit, grabbing your butt strongly with the other hand, making you squirm under his touch. "Such a mess for me"
"Just for you" you mindlessly mumbled.
"Good." He slapped your ass, not too strong, just enough for you to yelp in surprise. "Are you still on the pill?" He asked
"Yes" you said shily
"Did you fuck anyone else after me?" He asked, his voice just as commanding as before, and when you choked on your words, embarrassed to admit the truth, he slapped you a little harder, making you hiss.
"N-no, sir" you stuttered and the name just slipped.
Hui chuckled pleasantly at your answer, his dick twitching at hearing you call him "sir", but you two could discuss that later because all he wanted was to feel himself inside you.
"Good girl" he praised, caressing the spot where he hit you.
When both of his hands held onto your waist, you felt him entering you, his thickness welcoming in your pussy, and you realized how much you had missed the feeling of him filling you up.
He didn't give you time to adjust because you didn't need it, choosing instead to pound you mercilessly, his length hitting the perfect spot inside you, leaving you a whimpering mess already.
"That's for you to not forget who you belong to." He dig his fingers in your waist, the sound of skin slapping skin echoing in the room "you're mine." He grunted "this pussy is mine"
You buried your face in the pillow, unable to formulate any sentence to answer him, just moaning and gasping at every thrust.
You reached one hand in between your legs, touching your clit to increase your pleasure.
"Such a needy girl, so impatient." Hui said "do you want me to make you cum? Is that what you need?"
All you could do was hum and nod in agreement. Hui sped up his pace until your walls were clenching and jolts of pleasure took over your body. You felt him leaning over you, pulling your hair and forcing you to get on all fours. You gasped when you felt his hand wrap around your throat, pressuring the right spot to constrict the blood flow. You closed your eyes and rubbed your fingers faster, taking you to the edge while he hit your g spot just perfectly.
He let go of your neck when you finished riding your orgasm, and you gasped for air, catching your breath again.
"You take me so well, baby girl" He praised "take it just a little more for me, ok? I'm so close."
He kept thrusting into you, and you clenched again to help him reach his orgasm. You felt him pulling out just in time to shoot on your back, covering you in his cum as he finished jerking himself off.
He made space for you to lay on your back, and kneeled on the mattress in between your legs, putting his hands on your knees to spread them wider. He gasped pleasantly when he noticed the glistening mess on your core.
His eyes burned with lust as he lowered his hand and inserted two fingers inside you easily, your hole completely wet for him. He didn't go slow, nor mattered the fact that you had come not 10 minutes ago, and his fingers pumped fast in and out of you, and he curled them, knowing exactly how to hit the perfect spot inside you. He watched you squirming, a moaning mess on the sheets, gripping whatever you could find to hold yourself.
Not having enough of you, Hui lowered himself, not wasting any second to get your abused clit in between his lips, and your hands immediately grabbed his hair, a cry of pleasure leaving you.
"That's so good Hui, please don't stop, please, please." Your voice came out desperate and whiny, and Hui hummed in response, sending vibrations down your core. "I'm not gonna last long."
He looked up at you and you could see him smirking in between your legs, then proceeding to thrust his fingers harder and deeper, licking and sucking your clit until your whole body was shaking and your legs were closing around involuntarily as you reached your high, calling his name in screams as he dig his fingers in your thighs to keep you in place as you just couldn't control your orgasm as he didn't stop nor slow down, and you felt another wave of pleasure run through your body, who spasm uncontrollably now, and Hui leaned back up to watch you come undone
"Touch yourself, baby" he demanded, voice hoarse and your juices coating his chin.
You immediately circled your fingers around your pussy, overestimating your sensitive clit as you climaxed again in a row, so intensely that your body couldn't control its spasms and you felt your wetness pouring and gushing out of you, as you just couldn't stop screaming his name.
"Fuck, baby" you heard his breathy voice as you squirted calling for him.
Your body went limp and you closed your eyes, your heartbeat ringing in your ears, and you felt Hui throw himself next to you.
For a few seconds, there was nothing. No sound, no movements, nothing. Hui was breathing hard next to you and you were trying to calm your own breathing but you knew that soon enough one of you wouldn't bear the silence anymore and leave without words. So it was a shock when a few minutes after the high wore off, Hui turned so he was facing you, even if you faced up, looking at the ceiling.
"Y/N", he called surprisingly soft.
"Yeah?"
"Do you truly hate me?". The question caught you by surprise, you dared say it shocked you but yet you didn't move.
"No, Hui. I don't hate you. I hate how you treat me".
"Um", was all he said.
"Do you hate me?", you asked back.
"No", he sighed. "But, like you, hate how you treat me".
"How did we end up like this?", you couldn't help the chuckle that left your lips at the absurdity of it all.
"I have no idea", Hui joined in. "All I remember was me being a dick and not wanting to settle and then you were shooting daggers at me every time you saw me".
"Oh man, I wonder why I did that". Hui laughed at that and you caught a glimpse of his pretty smile.
"Well, yeah. But it did lead us to amazing sex every time too".
"We had amazing sex when we were together as well", you spoke matter of factly.
"I know", he poked you, making you fully turn your head in his direction. "That's what I wanted to talk to you about".
"About what? Us?".
"Us together". Hui was watching you intently and you turned, mirroring his position.
"Talk then".
"I want to give us a shot. I want us to work this time". You stood in silence for a few seconds, lost.
"...why? Why now?".
"I've been thinking about it for a while now and I miss you. I miss not fighting every time we see each other, your company". He seemed serious and your heart was almost beating out of your chest by now. "And tonight was definitely my breaking point. Seeing you with goodie two shoes Shinwon made me panic out of fear of losing you forever without giving us another try".
You stood there watching him for a while. He didn't pressure you, once again showing how much he knew you. He knew you needed your time and he respected that. Truth is, your feelings for Hui never died, only fuelled the fire of your anger and attraction to him. Giving you another shot was risky but then, everything with Hui was risky and if he was willing to put all his cards on the table for you, maybe you could do the same.
"I want to leave this place", was all you said.
Hui nodded, defeat clear on his face. He got up and got dressed in silence, you doing the same but watching him intently the entire time. When both of you were presentable again, you stood with your hand on the doorknob. Hui was a step away from you, close but not too close, watching you with tired eyes. Your free hand reached out to touch his hair softly and he almost jumped in surprise.
"I hope you drove here. I came by uber", you smiled at him. "Oh, and I hope you still remember my address and my favorite breakfast place to take me tomorrow when we wake up". You laughed at his face as he nodded like a kid who just got his perfect gift. "And don't steal my covers while we sleep!".
82 notes · View notes
voidstilesplease · 3 years
Text
By the Angel, TALK
Warning: THIS IS AN ANTI-CLARY AND JACE SPOILER RANT because I need an avenue to let out some of the steam I've been holding off since starting City of Fallen Angels. So PLEASE SKIP AHEAD because I don't want to burden you all with my reading woes.
This thing centers on the beginning of Chapter 9: From Fire Unto Fire and a little bit of Chapter 8. About eight pages of bad, bad romance set me off.
To start,
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The rest is under the cut, so you can go away now.
So, what's been happening to Clary and Jace thus far?
This book introduced them now as an official couple, picking up from the end of TMI Book 3: City of Glass. I don't remember their every scene since then to the point in Chapter 9 where I stopped, but basically, they're having relationship issues early on. They're less than two months into their relationship, and the drama is too frickin much. 
Jace has these weird dreams about murdering Clary and waking up guilty about his subconscious thoughts, so he goes angsting about it and avoiding her, snapping at her, being a total dick, and still question why people think they are on the brink of a break-up. 
So, Jace goes with Simon in the next few scenes, in his plight to get away from her as far as possible, yet still be somehow close by being around Clary's best friend to "protect" him, so his distant behavior will be reasonable and forgivable. Yeah, make that make sense. 🙄 But of course, one way or another, they're going to have to get to the confrontation part (that I still wish had been equivalent to an actual break-up), and so that's when Chapter 8 & 9 enters.
Chapter 8: Walk in Darkness pp. 185-186
Almost instantly, the light went out of them, and the remaining color drained out of his face. "I thought --- Simon said you weren't coming." ¹
[...] "So you only came because you thought I wouldn't be here? [...] Were you ever planning on talking to me again? [...] If you're going to break it off, the least you could do is tell me, not just stop talking to me and leave me to figure it out on my own."
"Why does everyone keep goddamn asking me if I'm going to break up with you? [...]²
First, what an asshole?! 
[1] So Jace finally in-your-face's Clary and confirms that he has been keeping his distance like Clary has the plague. He then has the audacity to [2] be annoyed for being questioned on his intentions of keeping the relationship that he has been actively evading for days!
I get that Jace sucks in romantic relationships and has been fucked up by his daddy-issues, but he has the Lightwoods. Heck, Alec is his parabatai. He sees working relationships, so he has to have known that you don't just stop talking to people close to you and have them not question the behavior, whether you're trying to pull away from them or not. Otherwise, then Jace is dumb for all that he's marketed as the "best" Shadowhunter in his age. Screw that.
---
“You talked to Simon about us?" Clary shook her head. "Why? Why aren't you talking to me?"
"Because I can't talk to you," Jace said. "I can't talk to you, I can't be with you, I can't even look at you."³
[3] Way to make a girl feel special, Jace. Oh, no, yeah. He's trying to do the opposite and push her away with some teenage boy angst that doesn't make any sense. Like, who says that, though, aside from dramatic love interests that can't make a better excuse for going emo? 
That line IS TOO DRAMATIC that it hurts, ugh. 🤮
Anyway, so Clary walks out after that. I don't sympathize with her, but I'd do the same. Who wouldn't? Unless you freeze in the ridiculousness of the situation, that is, which is also likely.
Chapter 9: From Fire Unto Fire pp. 190-195
Now, here's the real shit. I want to quote this entire six-page scene back to Cassie and scream at her.
Clary reached the door and burst out into the rain-drenched evening air. [...] and was about to race across the street against the light when a hand caught her arm and spun her around.
It was Jace. [...] "Clary, didn't you hear me calling you?"
"Let go of me." Her voice shook.
"No. Not until you talk to me."⁴
[4] DUDE, what even happened to your I CAN'T TALK TO YOU, I CAN'T EVEN LOOK AT YOU speech, huh? Be consistent for once, apart from your douchebag routine. Make up your mind, Jace.
---
Still holding her by the arm, he half-dragged her around the van and into a narrow alley that bordered the Alto Bar. ⁵
[5] Man, I love a bit of rough loving in my literature, but I'm so pissed at you, Jace, don't even. Lay the hell off.
---
"I was going to tell you that I was trying to help out Simon. [...]
"And you couldn't tell me? Couldn't text me a single line letting me know where you were?"⁶ [...]
[...]
"I think," he said slowly, "that I thought that the closest thing to being with you was being with Simon. Watching out for him. I had some stupid idea that you'd realize I was doing it for you and forgive me---"⁷
[6] Addressing the lack of communication, that's a great path to follow. These two need to talk so bad. [7] But this line? Sucks Balls. You could be with her, Jacey, and save all the readers your drama if you only pull your head out of your ass and try to communicate. It's like you're allergic to it.
---
She took a step back, blindly, and nearly tripped over an abandoned speaker. Her bag slid to the ground as she put her hand out to right herself, but Jace was already there. He moved forward to catch her, and kept moving until her back hit the alley wall, and his arms were around her, and he was kissing her frantically.⁸
[8] Not only is this achingly cheesy, but it's also totally not the way they should be going off about their situation. They were already talking -arguing, yes, but they're still using words to reach out, and their relationship absolutely cannot be healthy without them. Thus far, they have spoken so less in comparison with the times they've spent canoodling. They're not solving anything by having drama on one second and getting it on with dramatic kissing on the next.
I don't care what Clary says about being so lost in love with Jace. He's treating her like shit. The least he can do is give her answers that she has the right to demand from him. Kissing is not an answer. But, well, maybe to Clary, it is because the next parts from page 192 to 194 are spent on softcore porn in a dark alley under the frickin rain. I bet that's a very romantic setting in their minds, huh.
---
And now this part:
It was nerve-wracking. She could feel the feverish heat that came off him; her hands were still on his shoulders, but it wasn't enough. She wanted him wrapped around her, holding her tight. "W-why," she breathed. "can't you talk to me? Why can't you look at me?"
He ducked his head down to look into her face. His eyes, surrounded by lashes darkened with rainwater, were impossibly gold.
"Because I love you."⁹
[9] Is that supposed to make me tingle? SET ME ON FIRE, but that is the lousiest I love you in books that I have ever read. AND IT'S THE ONLY ONE THAT DOESN'T MAKE SENSE, at all!
Shut up with this, can you please. It's not romantic at all. It's a dumb excuse and an even dumber love from the two dumbest people in this whole frickin series. Oh my god.
Clary, realistically, will frown at this answer. She will pull the hell away and spat him in the face with how demeaning his love is if it can make her sick to the stomach with thinking he has already gone bored and is only cooking the perfect way to cut off their connection. He hasn't given her a sound reason, only desperate declarations of love like he's trying to convince them both that it's true. And it doesn't make sense how she's still plastered around him in the cold, trying to convince the readers that every word from Jace has deeper meanings that she understands no matter how gibberish they are. I'm not buying that, okay? Stop selling your larger-than-life connection bullshit because that isn't real.
You've only been together for two months, okay? The strongest you can feel for each other is lust. And it's showing.
---
His hands slid down to her waist and he kissed her, long and lingering, making her shudder.
She pulled away, "That doesn't make any sense."
"Neither does this," he said, "but I don't care. I'm sick of trying to pretend I can live without you. Don't you understand that? Can't you see it's killing me?"¹⁰
She stared at him. She could see that he meant what he said [...] Her desire for answers battled the more primal part of her brain, and lost. "Kiss me then,"¹¹
[10] NOBODY THREATENED YOU UNDER BLADE TO DO THAT BULLSHIT, so shut the hell up with the whining. [11] and Clary, I am so disappointed. You've both just drained me, and I'm dry inside like a raisin.
The next paragraphs describe their very erotic kissing against the wall. Jace, propping her up and her legs around his waist bull crap. Seriously? Am I supposed to believe these two are, what sixteen?- up until Isabelle thankfully ruins their moment by kicking a garbage can that would look better with Jace and Clary in it tbh.
---
And the nastiest horseshit of all:
Clary looked at Jace. At any other time, they would have laughed together at Isabelle's moodiness, but there was no humor in his expression, and she knew immediately that whatever they had had between them ---whatever had blossomed out of his momentary lack of control--- it was gone now. [...]
"Jace---" she took a step toward him.
"Don't," he said, his voice very rough. "I can't."¹²
And then he was gone [...]
[12] No, I frickin CANNOT. His actions keep on contradicting his words, and he's fickle and can't decide which mood to settle, and it's so exhausting, honestly. He wasted a few pages for a cosmic, meaningless declaration of feelings. They're empty words. At this point, I believe the writing only strives to convince the readers that these characters care for each other but is shitty at showing it.
It's not love, because they say it is love.
---
I was already gaining hope for this book, and then one simple few-pages scene with clace squishes it, smearing the innards on my face.
Honestly, TALK OR TAKE A BREAK. This back and forth can't continue throughout the rest of the book or -heaven forbid- the rest of the series. Or at least, put these characters in the background if they really must drag on this problem, because I care not a lick.
Bye.
22 notes · View notes
throughthenotes · 3 years
Text
Bowling w/ @AMindfulChaos @ALoverOfDreams & @InspiredAdams
Jaiden:
Just one or do you want a pitcher? <Beer. Talking about your traditions, it was nothing for Rainey and I to put a large pizza, nachos and a few pitchers of beer away while bowling in our day. It was the one thing she had insisted on once we found ourselves aged out of the system. She called it our one day of the week that we could look forward to for years and the old pastime had quickly became a favorite to us both. The problem was ever since my run in with gallery guru as she had come to call him, I had been laying low when it came to my partaking in any substance. Drinking mostly. Apparently, my issues tended to turn into a variety of problems that only people with policing authority could handle and wasn't that just the bitch of it all. "Actually, how about a Pepsi."> Rainey.. <That earned her a look. "What? I just don't feel like drinking any tonight." Right. Shaking my head, I took a turn towards the concession and headed there while Rainey set up our game. The half hearted glare she had given me in return, earned herself a chuckle of recognition. I knew why she wasn't drinking. Not that my sister was a lush or anything but beer and bowling, normally went hand in hand. Shrugging it off though and having to grab a bowling ball on the way back, I finally made it up there to look over the menu, even though it didn't take me long to figure out what I would be ordering. It was almost always the same. However, my thoughts were suddenly stolen from me because of the lovely brunette directly in front of me in line. You would have to be blind not to notice her but even with that, it would still be a poor excuse. That's when it hit me. What was I thinking? She has be here with someone. Another friend maybe. Seeing not another soul around on half price Wednesday night, I finally spoke up when you seemed to be lost in menu land.> Do you normally bowl by yourself? <So it wasn't the greatest ice breaker but my first impression wasn't a total loss I hoped when I flashed her that crooked grin.>
Camryn:
{I had fully intended to lock myself in my room and binge trash TV with a boatload of munchies. But @InspiredAdams wasn’t having any of that. He was insistent that we do something “outside of the house.” I held out for a long time. But then he promised me one of those ooey gooey cheese pizzas they had down at the bowling alley. And that sounded way better than the stuff laying around the house. Especially since we were down to slim pickings as we approached grocery day. As soon as we were inside, I left him to figure out all the technicalities while I made a beeline for the snack bar. The question was just pizza? Or did I want some wings too? Nachos? Oh, they had sliders too… Suddenly I was pulled from my decision making from a voice behind me. I spun around, intending to lie and say I was here with my boyfriend. It wouldn’t be the first time I had forced Chris to play the boyfriend role to save me from some random. Then he offered me that crooked grin, and my heart did a little flip} Oh, I’m not alone. {the look on your face told me you were assuming, and my eyes flew open a little wider} Brother! {jerks my thumb over my shoulder in the direction that I had left him} I’m here with my brother. {smiles, glancing around now for anyone that looked like they were with you} What about you? Are you here alone? {cringes internally at how hopeful that sounded}
Jaiden:
I'm not alone. I mean if you count us both, we're here together. [Chuckling low, I glanced in the direction you looked before turning my gaze back to yours. My grin only growing wider at the mention of a sibling because what were the chances of you believing me when I told you it was the same for me.> That was a joke. I'm here with my sister. <Not a joke. It couldn't be if it were true and we very much were not alone. Those kind eyes of mine, won you over then when you smiled my way, letting me off the hook only to have it falter when the clearing of throats could be heard. "You ordering, hun?" Arching a playful brow, I point up at the menu you had been looking at only moments ago.> They are waiting on you. The pizza is good and so are the nachos. My sister likes them.
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Camryn:
{I wasn’t ready to stop talking to you. And I had just opened my mouth to ask if it was an older sister or younger when I heard the cashier asking for my order. My cheeks instantly flushing as I let out a laugh at myself and turned to her} Oh, geez. I’m so sorry. {flashes her a bright smile before beginning} Um, a pepperoni pizza, please? And a pitcher of Pepsi? {glances over my shoulder at you, taking that nacho recommendation to heart} Oh, and some nachos too please? {I quickly paid her, and stepped out of your way, off to the side where she told me to wait for my order to be ready.}
Jaiden:
<"Same for you?" I actually laughed, shaking my head out of my thoughts at the order you had already placed.> The Thomas special. <I knew you were watching on. The fact that we spent that much time here wasn't lost on me or you for that matter when asked for my own order. It was our usual and I paid accordingly once she rang me up. Receipt now in hand, I casually slipped it into my pocket and walked over to wait beside you when our pitchers of Pepsi were set down in front of us.] They will put the rest on a tray and bring it out.
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Can I walk you back to your lane? <I didn't want to part ways just yet. Besides, I still needed to get your number and when you offered me that smile again with a touch of a soft nod, I held my arm out for you to hook your arm around. Leading the way, carrying your soda for you, we reached our fork in the road so to speak, and I cleared my throat before addressing the situation we found ourselves in. Again.] I guess the question now is are you seeking out lust or looking for love? [Can't help but smirk when I look you way now.]
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Camryn:
{pops my brows at mention of the Thomas Special. Wondering if Thomas was the first or the last name. Then it dawned on me that it meant you came here a lot if you had them knowing your order so well. And I smirked to myself. Suddenly I was very interested in bowling more often. Chris was going to be either really pleased, or wishing he had never made me come out tonight. Then you were standing next to me again. I didn’t even have the ability to care how lost I seemed because all I could think about was how good you smelled. If Ed or Chris were here they would be rolling their eyes and accusing me of already mentally doodling our names in a notebook. That’s…if I knew your name at least. Thomas though! I knew Thomas! Then you asked to walk me to the lane and I probably agreed way too easily. But it was such a cute offer. And you were hot so…} Umm…? {Your question had caught me off guard. Both is a bad answer right? I laughed nervously because I had half a mind to be really honest and tell you that it was both. But I also knew that was going to only get me in trouble. So I said what I hoped wasn’t going to scare you off} Honestly? I would love to be in love. I write a lot of songs about it. But, yeah, actually experiencing it would be…cool. {cringe number two of the night. I needed a better vocabulary}
Jaiden:
Love it is then. <With a soft tug of my arm and a wink, I began the short walk with you down to the LOVE side of the lanes, pointing it out on the wall with a kick of my chin in that direction.> Does this look familiar now? <I knew in asking that you could have taken it literal, and began looking for your brother, or you could have taken it all the way back to my original question itself. For whatever the reason, I chose to stay in that space and ask the question that had been dancing to get out since you said you had never experienced being in love before. My desire to know more about these songs was fueled by your same statement as well.> Never. Not even a guy in high school? <You have to at least be in college, right? There was no way around it and you really hadn't offered that up yet either. So I took the plunge and spoke up with a grin.> What name could I find these songs under if you don't mind me asking. You already know my last name is Thomas.
Camryn:
{I had to stop myself from facepalming when I saw the big letters written on the wall. But before I could turn too red with embarrassment at my awkwardness, you redirected my mind with your next question} No. Most of the boys in high school were too scared of my brother. {CRINGE! Why would I say that? Now you were really gonna run. But rather than make things better, I did what I always do and just kept talking. Making it worse, I’m sure.} He had a little bit of a temper and… {Trails off as I finally manage to stop myself from rambling, and clears my throat} Nothing has been released, released. I mean, I have a Youtube. Camryn Adams. {smiles} But you can call me Cammy.
Jaiden:
Ah, an older brother. <With a temper no less. This was getting better by the second. Was it possible I was walking towards that sense of impending doom? Or would I be spared of your brother's wrath upon his first impression of me. Fuck... Glancing back over my shoulder, I look Jaiden Thomas. Trust me when I say, I'm still going to check out that Youtube. <Flashing that crooked grin again, I pulled you closer to me by that hook of my arm you had.> You want to head back the other way?
Camryn:
{my eyes had scanned all the lanes close to LOVE, and I hadn’t spotted Chris. I guess I should’ve waited long enough to figure out where he was going before I went to the snack bar. But then, if I had done that, I might have missed you. Giving one last scan, I nodded my head} Hmm…yeah, I don’t see Chris anywhere. Maybe I should’ve known he wouldn’t have gone this far. {laughs more to myself than anything, relief flooding my body that you hadn’t dropped my arm the second you heard about my brother} Oh! There he is! {lifting a finger, I pointed to him before pulling you to stop for a second} But if you contact me through my Youtube…I might mistake you for a weirdo that wants pictures of my feet and not answer…
Jaiden:
Do you want me to contact you again, Cammy? <It was only a quick glance in the direction you pointed, your brother not that far from where @ALoverOfDreams was before I turned my attention back to you and that death grip you were suddenly imposing on my arm. Smirking at first, I welcomed how forward you appeared to be, going for gold as it were only to be cut short with the rest of that final thought. Yeah, the second you said feet, I knew I pulled a face. It would have been smart of me to pause when you held me back by that arm of mine but I couldn't stop the chuckle if I wanted to. You laughed at the expression on my face, and nervous or not, I leaned in to whisper against your ear, unbeknownst to me that @InspiredAdams was about to make his presence known just in time to see you cozying up to yours truly.> How about you give me your number and I'll text you. That way you have my cell too.
Camryn:
{Flushes instantly at your first question. I was making a ton of assumptions, and I knew it. But I really liked you already and it just happened. Then you leaned in and whispered and my stomach filled with butterflies, causing me to completely forget about the proximity of @InspiredAdams, already reaching for my phone in my back pocket to hold it out to you} Here, text yourself with my phone.
Jaiden:
Sure thing, beautiful. <And just like in the movies, it really was that simple. You had been getting your phone out when I heard a shuffling of feet and yours of course, came to a full stop when I heard the clearing of a throat next. "Cammy, this guy bothering you?"> Who, me? <It was your brother. There was no way it was anyone else and from the way you had spoken, I believed this wasn't a normal thing for you. Bowling that was.> She's fine. Just giving her my number. You mind holding this? <I didn't give @InspiredAdams a chance to really reply. Instead I simply handed the pitcher of Pepsi over so I could take your phone from you. All the while your other arm was still hooked around mine as I plugged my number in, quick to snap a pic of us together while your brother watched on and waited for you to introduce us.>
Chris:
What the hell is taking her so long? [I glanced toward the snack bar and didn’t see @ThroughTheNotes over there anymore. Then I finally saw her coming toward me. But she wasn’t alone. Immediately I was on my feet and making my way over to her. She was way too fucking nice for her own good. And I was fully prepared to pull out whatever card I needed to make him get lost] Cammy, this guy bothering you? [He barely looked at me when he answered with that, “Who, me?” And my brow shot up as I was handed a pitcher of soda, looking between @ThroughTheNotes and @AMindfulChaos.] Camryn, who is this? Do you know him?
Rainey:
(I must have entered @AMindfulChaos's name three times before the electric scorecard saved it. The final time, I changed the spelling to L O S E R and would you look at that, it set up the sheet no problem. Laughing quietly to myself, I hadn't heard the gentleman walk up until he asked me if I needed assistance. Politely declining his invitation to join him when I explained I wasn't alone, he didn't seem to take the hint until I held up my hand, sporting a gold band. The fact that it was found inside the bowling bag of one "Fred from Kentucky" and after many, many failed attempts to locate its previous owner, Fred from Kentucky had been born. Thinking back to the day that I found it, I remembered the crap Jaiden had given me over the name. "Fred the blue ball. Do you hear yourself, Rainey?" We had a good laugh about it but it worked seeing how Fred always came through for me from that day forward. Smiling now too, I waited to look up until the guy had made his exit to return to his own lane, taking a gander around the bowling alley in search of my brother. It wasn't like Jaiden to take a stroll, always one to come right back anytime we were here, I furrowed my brows when the snack bar attendant showed up with our food. It was only after further inspection though I realized it wasn't ours and I got up to go in search of you, heading back up to the bar to let them know our order was wrong in the process when I spot you with a girl. And a guy... Feeling that pit in my stomach already, I started to head towards you all instead. Our food long forgotten as worry started to set in.)
Camryn:
{squints my eyes at @InspiredAdams in warning. He was NOT going to scare this one away. And I hoped he was picking up on my unspoken message as we stared at each other. Until you held up the phone and I smiled for the picture before finally speaking} I do now. Chris, this is Jaiden. Jaiden, this is my totally going to not be a jerk brother, Chris.
Jaiden:
<Chuckling, I waited until I handed the cell back to you before I extended my hand.> Nice to meet you ... <Not a jerk Chris almost flew out of my mouth when I happen to see Rainey heading our way on a mission. Her purpose plain as day the closer she got and I mumbled "Shit.." under my breath. The last thing I needed was this guy on my ass about you but to do it in front of Rainey, well I wouldn't live it down if I got us kicked out of our favorite home away from home. Not to mention, it was your brother.> ... Chris. She was alone so I offered to escort her back to her lane. I plan on asking her out soon too. <What the hell was I saying? This was suppose to make it better, right? Laying out my intentions. Rainey always said it was the best policy to be honest so why stop now.> I was just on my way back. <Looking to @ALoverOfDreams as I spoke, that last part was meant for her when I finally cleared my throat, only taking the moment to introduce my sister to @ThroughTheNotes, purposely.> Cammy, this is Rainey.
Chris:
[I kept my eyes on Cammy as she gave me her damn looks. And continued to stare at her when she introduced me as her “not gonna be a jerk brother, Chris.” Then @AMindfulChaos said that bit about asking her out that had my eyes finally flicking over to him, really assessing him now as I firmly shook his hand. He looked like he could be another clown in the business Cammy played around in} Are you an artist too? {I smirked because I was out of slapping range of Cammy. But then we were joined by another person which left my question unanswered. But one look at her and I wasn’t too bothered to hear the answer anymore. If this was his sister, maybe I could keep an eye on him if it meant she stuck around…]
Rainey:
It's nice to meet you, Cammy. (My gaze darted between @ThroughTheNotes and Jaiden, seeing her arm still wrapped around my brother's like her life depended on it until I saw him shaking hands with the other guy privy to our little gathering here. The gesture between the two was older than dirt and more so added to complement the giving of your word on something. I could read body language pretty well though. The guy didn't seem to thrilled about Jaiden escorting her back but all that changed the second he looked back over his shoulder at me.) He boxes. I mean, boxing. Like bowling. I mean it's not like bowling per say but it'ssss a sport. (Damn it. Not now... My smile was small as I gave Jaiden a look of my own. If he wasn't going to tell him, I was.) That is if you consider kicking ass an art form.. (Maybe I wasn't so good at ice breakers either. Being met with utter silence was clue number one. Not even crickets as the four of us stood there as if we were in a stalemate. Only I wasn't going to allow that.) Would you guys like to join us for a game? Or maybe you two would like to play your own? Oh I know, teams!
Camryn:
{smiles brightly at Rainey when she addresses me. Then squeezes Jaiden’s arm at the mention of his being a boxer. Should I point out the obvious to Chris that they had something in common? That could be good? Or maybe very bad… Before I made up my mind, the silence was broken again, and I jumped on it} Yes! Chris! We would love to. {nods}
Jaiden:
<Fantastic. Can't wait. Those were just a couple of options for answers to that ever popular question my sister asked and as I felt you give my arm a second squeeze, your brother's gaze sizing me up once again caught my attention after Rainey had let the cat out of the bag.> I do good for being fairly new to the sport. I get by. <Giving another nod of my head, I wink and start to walk with you as Rainey leads the way, speaking loud enough for Chris to hear me.> So you want to play against me, Cammy or with me? I could show you a few things too.
Chris:
[Boxing. So, he wasn’t a clown in her business. He was one that dabbled in mine. Now I was assessing him in a whole new light. Cammy was in for an earful on the way home. I’d seen how fucking cocky some of those guys could be… “I do good for being fairly new to the sport.” Cue my brows shooting up again. Maybe not too cocky… “I could show you a few things too.” Nope. There it was. I opened my mouth to bite back on that bullshit only to have Cammy fucking kick me. I let out a grunt and glared at her as she shook her head at me. It was clear I wasn’t getting her away from him tonight. So now, I needed to make the best of it. With a smirk, I spoke up again, bruised shin be damned] Cammy doesn’t need to learn anything new. And the Adams are better as a team.
Rainey:
Family first always. You guys like pepperoni pizza? We have plenty! (Yep. Making lemonade shouldn't be too hard with the lemons this bunch was carrying. Trying to make light of the tension that seemed to shift into second gear and right on into third when I reached our lane, I didn't even look in the direction of the guy from earlier as we passed him. Opting to stop at our scorecard to enter in your names instead as I see Jaiden assist Cammy with finding her ball.) Chris (Lifting my gaze to yours, I smile, before continuing on.) With a "C" or "K"?
Chris:
[Clearly I was speaking French. And this guy wasn’t the least bit deterred by me. As I watched the two of them picking out balls, I was redirected by my name being called. My gaze catching with @ALoverOfDreams’ and grinning crookedly at that smile. disappointment, but did my best to hide it]
Rainey:
That's right. Like the rain but with an EY at the end. (Don't ramble. Don't you do it! Telling myself that should have worked but I wasn't so sure it was going to. Not when I saw that crooked grin of yours.) It's okay, they seem distracted. (Taking your hand when you offered it right away, I gave it a light squeeze, my smile growing kinder by the second. That was until I followed your slight change in direction with your eyes down to our clasped hands. Oh no! How was I going to explain this? And even better, the follow up question to that, was were you going to believe me?) Fred from Kentucky.. (That questioning brow lift you gave had me laughing nervously as I started to explain it, still holding your hand until I realized it and I let your hand slip free suddenly. The game hot potato had nothing on me.) My fake husband. I use the ring to keep creepers away. Like the guy we walked by? (Fighting the internal groan won out over hiding the heat that seemed to rise on my cheeks at how close you were and I broke my gaze away from yours so I could finish putting your names in.) Do you guys bowl a lot? I don't think I've seen you here before.
Chris:
[Fred. From Kentucky. At first, I thought you were trying to tell me you were in a long distance marriage. But then the pieces of the puzzle started to fall together. And oddly enough, when you mentioned a creeper, I felt that same protective instinct I had a few minutes ago bubbling up again. But this time it was about you and not her. Apparently he had felt the weight of my stare. Because he looked over just in time to lock eyes with me in a stare down I wasn’t going to lose. And I smirked when he were out of my mouth] I wonder if I could convince Cammy to get a Fred from Kentucky… [just as quickly as I said it, I realized that was probably offensive to you seeing as how the current dude was your brother. And I mumbled out.] Sorry… [looks up at the screen where our names finally popped up, welcoming the chance to ignore my little outburst] We used to bowl a lot with our pops. He was on a league. But after ma passed, he became a bit of a hermit. [jerks my thumb over my shoulder in Cammy’s direction] She’s been in a funk lately. So I thought I’d pull her away from the Netflix and out into society again that doesn’t involve the shitheads that she dances with.
Rainey:
Oh, I don't know about that. Fred is a good man, he works hard for his family. A very upstanding and loyal guy too. I wouldn't have married him if he was a cheater. (Teasing a little, I gave your arm a soft nudge but only after spying your stare down that bounced between Jaiden and Mr. Creepy, himself. Waiting until your gaze finally met mine again and I nodded softly as I spoke.) You two have more in common than you think. Jaiden is just as protective of me as you are of her. (My voice took on a softer tone then but didn't lack in conviction as I spoke about my brother. He was the only family I had left. I loved him.) I know you just met me...us really but Jaiden is a good guy, he just has some issues sometimes controlling himself when people are assholes too. (Taking a moment, I looked behind you to see them standing there a ways back, bowling balls in hand and lost in their own conversation. My smile widening further when they start to make their way back over to us and I'm quick with my own curiosity taking center stage for a second as I added to the "story". Only this time, it included you..) So was your wife busy tonight too?
Chris:
[I wanted to take you at your word about Jaiden. But it wasn’t that simple for me. I’d seen her go through too much shit with her overly trusting heart. What if he had a hidden shitty guy side that you weren’t privy to as his sister? Still, I didn’t hate the protective side you hinted at. As long as his aggressions didn’t ever turn toward Cammy. The thought alone causing me to tense up for a second before blowing out a calming breath. Your question causing my eyes to snap back to you in utter shock] Me? Wife? [shakes my head with a chuckle] No. There is no Francesca from Kentucky. Real or fabricated.
Jaiden:
<There's a first time for everything right? As sayings went that one there was a great indication that I was pulling double duty, while trying to appear cool about it, and was failing miserably at that. It was the first time I not only had tried to keep my eyes on Rainey but then there was you, and that pull to let my gaze linger on your beautiful face was just too great.> I apologize. I don't normally leave her for this long. <And therein lies the dilemma. There was the asshole that was in here every time we were that constantly hit on my sister too that was a factor. So the protective streak kept hopping the rails like a train would, the direction it sought suddenly flipped like a switch and damn if that didn't make me feel exposed for all of 60 seconds too long. In fact, it put me downright on edge. I had a feeling you could sense it too because suddenly I was met with a pair of the kindest eyes I had ever seen and I braved that grin for you. Having found the right size ball, our trip back over to our lane was met with one last pitstop and that was to ask for a fresh pie and pitcher to be brought over, the clerk letting me know it would be on the house for the mix up anyway.> Be honest, are you any good? <Chuckling, I take the ball from you to carry as we head back that way. The sight of your brother sitting so close to Rainey causing me to pop my neck and grin over at you.> At the game. Any family secrets I should know about?
Camryn:
{I could sense the anxious energy rolling off of you. And after a few seconds of watching your eyes flick back over to your sister, I recognized that same brotherly protectiveness that Chris sported most of the time. Which honestly, made me like you even to her, but I knew if I were talking to Chris, that wouldn’t have comforted him either. So I stopped myself, instead just following your lead first to the snack bar and then back toward the lane} I used to be decent. {glances over at you with a smile} Our papa was on a league and he used to take us bowling a lot. But I haven’t been for a long time. So I might be a little rusty.
Jaiden:
Rusty or not, it's cool that your family use to bring you. Rainey and I went once before when we were kids but it wasn't until we left the system that our love for it really took off.<Too much, too soon? I didn't think so. The way I looked at it if you weren't interested after that then I knew where you stood. Something told me though that wouldn't be the case as I gazed into your eyes.> Does your Dad not bowl anymore? You said was.. <Which led me to believe something happened or he would have been here today. Still holding your gaze, I stopped just a few feet away from the lane. Close enough to hear your brother start to clear his throat and I motioned for you to go on.> He can wait.
Camryn:
{my curiosity was piqued by your statement. But then you were asking me about papa. And I didn’t know which way to go. With a laugh, I decided to tell you just that} First, I want you to know I’m very curious about your past now. {smiles} I hope you’ll share with me whenever you feel comfortable? And papa is still around. He just… {makes a face} I don’t know how to explain it. He’s different. After mama passed, he stopped leaving the house. We go over there a lot to make sure he’s okay. But he doesn’t like to come out, he stopped working on cars with Chris… It’s almost like he died in a way too. {sighs} I’m sorry. That’s super depressing.
Jaiden:
No, I'm sorry that happened with him. Sometimes things happen to people and they just don't come back the same. <My eyes flickered briefly over to Rainey as I said it, hearing her laugh at something your brother said and I offered you an apologetic look when I turned back, adding a crooked grin into the mix.> I am glad you told me for what it's worth. As for me, I'm an open book. You can ask me anything.
Camryn:
{laughs with a shake of my head} Oh, Jaiden. You shouldn’t have said that to me. Watch this… {pulls you over to where Chris and Rainey are sitting and taps Chris on the shoulder} Hey, Chris? What would you do if… {laughs hard and looks at you again when he groans instantly} See? I ask TOO many questions. And it annoys some people. {sticks my tongue out at Chris}
Jaiden:
Yeah but I'm not some people. I'm Jaiden. <Taking a moment to watch the exchange between you two, I chuckle and shake my head. There was no question you were siblings and as I looked over to Rainey, I kicked my chin up next, our secret signal as if to ask if everything was okay. When she gave me that kind smile of hers in return, I felt the tension leave my shoulders a bit and took a glance up at the scorecard, ready to start our game. As I looked up to see who was going first I see the name LOSER in the spot where mine normally went and my eyes narrowed playfully in my sister's direction.> Cute, Rainey. I'm on your team, remember?
Chris:
[“What would you do if…” Those words meant Cammy was about to unleash a million hypothetical questions on you. And I couldn’t help but groan the second I heard them. I didn’t even care that she was setting me up to prove something to Jaiden if it meant I didn’t actually have to go down that path. But it was my turn to laugh when I realized Rainey had put his name down as loser] I like the odds already. [shoots Rainey a wink]
Rainey:
(There was no Francesca. At least not from Kentucky and not real either. That meant no girlfriend and no wife. Suddenly, I found myself smiling wider at that little known fact now and started to say something moronic like, "That's really great!" when it hit me out of nowhere. Just because there was no Francesca didn't mean there wasn't the possibility of a Fred for you too. I felt silly then for my assumption at first, thinking I read your body language all wrong and was about to ask if there was a Fred instead when both of our teammates showed up. Our conversation cut short.) There you guys are! (It was then that I moved to sit on my knees and address them both, only to be reminded that it was moments ago that it had been just us planning to play, and not teams with new friends.) It was before I asked them. Give me a break. (My tone was teasing even when you give me that wink and I mouthed a quick "Sorry." to my brother. Our fresh pizza and Pepsi arriving then too.) I'm up first! (Gathering up my ball, I took to our lane after thanking the server for bringing our food, making sure Jaiden tipped before I moved to the middle diamond, marking my spot with the tip of my shoe, seeing my shot right as I take it and I come back after rolling a spare. Not bad! Now, it was game on.)
Camryn:
{rolls my eyes at my brother’s cheesy remark, grabbing a piece of pizza instantly. It was, after all, the thing that had convinced me to come in the first place, and taking a seat on one of the chairs off to the side of the lane as I watch Rainey take her for my overprotective brother}
Jaiden:
<I probably sat there and watched the whole thing unfold before me for a good ten minutes. Long enough for your brother to damn near trip over his tongue with the way it rolled out like some damn cartoon with wolf eyes. Only my sister wasn't Jessica Fucking Rabbit. It was payback for the way I had handed the pitcher over and seeing the both of them interact as they were, Rainey all smiles more so than normal, I had to wonder just exactly what your brother's story was, and yours too.> Is it good? The pizza? Best in all the state as far as bowling alley food goes. Not to mention, they serve Pepsi. Speaking of which, do you want? <Chuckling, I got up while you took a bite of pizza to grab us both a cup. The soft nod you gave me as you brought your hand up to cover your mouth was adorable and I poured us some of the tasty beverage, handing you the cup as our siblings became lost in their own conversation, with your brother finally getting up to take his shot when I clear my throat loudly as if to say some time today..> So I'm curious about something. What are you going to tell your boyfriend about me taking you out? <Sitting down beside you now, I ran my arm along the back of your chair, the action causing you to scoot in closer to my side and I take a drink, grinning over at you.>
Camryn:
{Mama always told me to take my time when I’m eating. Especially around boys. It’s not lady like to stuff your face like you haven’t eaten for a week. I never listened to mama. And this pizza was exactly what I wanted. So when you asked me if I wanted some Pepsi, all I could do was nod. Luckily I had managed to swallow and hadn’t taken a sip of my soda yet when you asked that. My eyes automatically darting to my brother because of how he’s covered for me in the past before returning to yours} There is no boyfriend to speak of. {smiles} What about your girlfriend. Will she be mad at me for sitting this close?
Jaiden:
No girlfriend. <I chuckled at your comeback. The assumption on both our parts turning up to be false and yeah, I was happy to hear that.> You know I had to ask with you being so beautiful and all. So what is it that you do? You working anywhere or go to school? <Taking another drink, I watched as you did the same, this unspoken conversation we were having with our eyes was just an added bonus when I bring my free hand up to tuck a loose strand of your hair behind your ear.> Your brother have a job? <I didn't see anything wrong with asking that. Doing a bit of recon work myself, I wanted to know what I had to look forward to in the likes of your brother suddenly hanging around too. I wasn't about to let anyone hurt Rainey.> He got a girl?
Camryn:
{takes my time with my next sip, only popping my brows in response first. If you spent any time around me, you would quickly recognize the tells that I was about to tease you} Hmm…were you thinking about asking him out too? {smiles wide at you. I knew what you were doing. And I didn’t blame you. But I had to tease. Had to. Finally letting a laugh out, I answered you} I am a Laker Girl. {smiles proudly} I’ve worked for it all my life. And my ex ALMOST screwed it up for me. But I made it. I also do a lot of acting and singing. I’m a born entertainer. I’m also in school. It’s one of the requirements actually. {nods seriously} As for Chris, he’s a photographer and does web design to pay the bills. So he lives on his computer. {leans to the side, placing my hand beside my mouth as I whisper} And he’s single. So you’re safe to make your move. {nudges you before busting into a fit of laughter}
Jaiden:
I don't know though.. What if I'm not his type? <Laughing this time, I had been busted before but not quite like that. You were smart, funny and hot. Did I really meet a Laker girl at the bowling alley? Could I be that lucky? You were definitely beautiful enough, that was a given but as I let my eyes wander down along your body, checking you out, even with you sitting I suddenly had visions of you in your uniform. Those routines at half time coming to mind then too and I quickly snap my gaze back up to yours before looking back at the scorecard, coming face to face with a shooting glare when I see that it was officially my turn.> Looks like I'm up. Hold that thought. I want to know more about this singing career of yours and your channel. <I hadn't forgotten about that part either. Grabbing up my ball, I killed what was left of my drink and set the cup down. Moving to take my position to serve you with a strike first thing. Setting the bar pretty high where my competitive nature was concerned.>
Camryn:
{I watched as a series of emotions seemed to play out across your face, relishing in the fact that you seemed to be just as animated as me without meaning too. Then follows your eyes to the scoreboard, nearly humphing that you had to leave, and watching maybe a little too closely as you took your turn. Jumping up and cheering for you when you roll that strike, causing Chris to remind me that you’re the opposition} What? It’s in my nature to cheer. Kind of. {offers him a shrug and laughs before turning back to you as you return to the sitting area}
Jaiden:
<And that's how it went. Every few minutes we would take our turns, keeping up with our separate conversations for the most part outside of the occasional trash talk we seemed to throw one another's way. It was all in good fun even as I moved to help you with your next turn. Not really caring to win one way or the other anymore, the more we chatted, my curiosity piqued.> When are you off? Or maybe I should ask when a good time is to take you out on this date of ours? <grins and grabs up another piece of pizza, offering it to you first.>
Camryn:
{mama’s words were playing out in my head again. “Don’t overeat. That’s not lady like either.” Reaching for the piece, I smiled at you} We practice a couple times a week. And, of course, I dance at all the home games. Other than that it’s kind of up in the air with my other projects. {laughs} But if you give me a date, I’ll make it work. {winks at you as I take a bite of that piece of pizza now}
Jaiden:
We will make it work. <I put emphasis on the "we" part and grinned, picking up another slice and digging into it. Thinking over the evening and what you said while I chewed, I waited until I finished my slice to ask my next question.> You think it would be okay if I came and checked out a home game? See you in action. <Grinning wider at the thought, I shrugged a shoulder as I got up to take my last turn, Rainey calling my attention to the scores. Yeah you didn't have the final say on who could attend but we both knew I would be going to see Then maybe I could escort you home. Unless you have other arrangements made? <Glancing your brother's way when I said that last part, I was waiting for my ball to come back to me on the return.> Does that sound like a plan?
Camryn:
{sits up straighter in my chair, the excitement clear on my face at your question as those butterflies filled my stomach. The idea of you watching me while I was out there would make my night. And I was ready to say yes before you jumped up and went to take your turn. You probably knew my answer anyway as I bobble headed along while you talked} I can get you really good seats too! One of the perks. {my smile dropping slightly} Sometimes I don’t get out of there until a little later though. Will that mess with your work? {tilts my head curiously} What do you do anyway?
Jaiden:
I take a couple of courses then I drive the delivery van for Rainey. Wherever she has a catering gig, I normally will hang out but the last one didn't go so well. <It wasn't really my story to tell, it was Rainey's and while I was okay with sharing anything and everything about myself, there were some things still private for her. Offering a small grin, I nodded impressed, the excitement clear as day on your face and I have a seat next to you to start changing back into my shoes so we can turn our bowling ones in.> I think congratulations are in order. You guys won. <I wasn't even sore about it. Granted, I wasn't sure how well I liked your brother getting all cozy with Rainey but I didn't have much room to talk, did I?> She's going to have her own commercial kitchen one day. That's her dream.
Camryn:
{I could feel the weight of Chris’ stare as we made our plans. But I ignored him. He was NOT going to have any say in this. I did shoot him a smirk though when you came and sat back down next to me so he couldn’t fully eavesdrop on what it was you did} I’m smile} And that you help support her dream. Maybe I could put a good word in with the team next time we need an event catered.
Jaiden:
You would do that for her? <My brows popped at the gesture, my grin widening further when you nod once again and I couldn't help but chuckle. The offer to put in a good word could do wonders for Rainey's business, really getting it off the ground more. The Lakers were nothing to snub your nose at either and the more I thought about it the more I realized just how life changing that could be for her. For us.> Only if you're sure but you know don't have to. I'm still taking you out regardless. <Winking, I gathered up my bowling shoes when you do, walking with you up to the front slowly on purpose to drag the night out, I didn't want it to end even though I knew it had to. It wasn't until we were all outside though, our siblings walking ahead that I slowed even more, turning to face you.> I'm going to call you tomorrow.
Camryn:
{If you were walking slowly on purpose I couldn’t tell. But I sure was. Thank goodness I let Chris talk me into coming tonight. This was way better than the promised pizza. My last thought causing me to let out a soft laugh at myself that probably confused you} Please do. {steps a little closer, leveling my gaze with yours} And like actually call tomorrow, yeah? None of that macho guy stuff where they make you wait a day to not seem too eager. Trust me, I’ve dated those guys and I’m not interested in more of that.
Jaiden:
<Keeping my gaze locked with yours, I let you finish, thinking there was no possible way I was waiting two days to call. Not after the night we had and as I reached out to stroke your reddened cheek, seeing that smile, I shook my head and leaned in, whispering against your ear when we reached your car, your brother having walked Rainey to ours across the parking lot.> You’ll be lucky if I’m not texting you before then. I’m not like other guys, Cammy. <Leaning up against your car with you now, I can’t help but grin then too, seeing that blush deepen across your face..> You’ll see first hand that I’m not. That’s a promise.
Camryn:
{I know I had just met you. But I already trusted you. I’m sure Chris wouldn’t be happy to hear that. But it was the truth. And I found myself chanting in my head, please don’t be too good to be true. Please don’t be too good to be true} I believe you. {playfully glares at you, the effect being lost as my blush betrays me} Don’t make me regret it. {That crooked grin had those butterflies kicking up again as I let out a shy laugh} And you can text me any time you want. I might even assign you your own special tone.
Jaiden:
No regrets. Not even a single letter. <Laughing, I cracked that joke, hoping like hell you've seen that movie when I stopped short, brows furrowing at first before I gave you that crooked grin again. That shy laugh I was sure was going to be my downfall but I was finding I didn't mind the more we spoke. I thoroughly enjoyed the night out bowling with you and went as far to tell you so before opening your car door and waiting for you to step inside. At that last minute however, I took hold of your hand and brought it to my lips, kissing across each knuckle as words left my lips, that grin still firmly in place.> I really had a great time. Text when you get home? <Even that was a date in itself if we thought about, a date I was looking forward to once I were settled for the night.>
Camryn:
{With that kiss to my hand, I was a goner. However this turned out, good or bad, I was in for the ride. Giving your hand a light squeeze as I finally settled into the seat, I smiled up at you} I will. I’ll pick out your special tone on the ride home. {offers you an exaggerated wink and a laugh}
Rainey:
I’m thinking beginner’s luck maybe? (How is it this easy to joke with you? I had been asking myself that all night and almost let the words slip out once or twice when the ice breaker effectively did its job. We had found ourselves in a rather comfortable position. Some mild jabs when it came to our turns during the game but the night had actually turned pleasant which I was grateful for with the addition of yourself and your sister to our little bowling league mix we had going on.) So no Francesca, huh. How is that possible? (A very bold or forward question coming from me. It was so unlike me to even... Oh. Realization hit like a ton of bricks then. Was it considered flirting? If it was, it was so apparent that I was bad at it and BOOM, hi there anxiety.) I'm glad I... mmmet you tonight. (Oh yeah. Yep. Still horrible at it. In fact, my nerves got the best of me and I had to pause so not to stumble over my words. And only when we reached my van, did I take a chance glance your sister’s way with Jaiden, making sure they were okay before I continued on around to the passenger side of my van with you, feeling completely safe in your presence while out of sight of Jaiden’s. Which was another first for me too.)
Chris:
[I didn’t know where the hell you came from. But I was thanking all the stars and gods that I had the idea to bring Cammy here today. Had I not, I wouldn’t have met you. Which is funny because before tonight, I was completely closed off to the idea of a relationship again after the dumpster fire that was my last. A few minutes with you and I was rethinking the whole thing. You were a total package from what I could tell. Funny, beautiful, a good sport. Hell, you even caused me to lay off of Cammy for the time being while she was clearly getting close to your brother. I couldn’t help the goofy grin that graced my face when you stumbled over your words for a second. Damn if that didn’t just make me like you even more} Honestly? {stops so that I’m standing directly in front of you as you lean back against that van door} I almost had a Francesca. And that was a mess. {rubs the back of my neck before giving a shrug} Kind of turned me off to relationships for a while. {smirks, the fact that I was being so quick to say certain things the exact way I always tell Cammy not to not lost on me as I reach to tuck a piece of hair behind your ear} I’m feeling a little more open to them again now though…
Rainey:
Now? As in right now... (I had zoned in on those eyes of yours first but then that goofy grin was next which only made me smile wider, effectively leaving my gaze to linger on your mouth. You were right there.. That strand of hair you tucked behind my ear fueled my desire to reach out but I stayed right there pressed up against the van. Reminding myself that this wasn't some steamy romance novel. At least not yet.) That's good.. I mean wait no, it's not good. I didn't mean it was good that Francesca hurt you. I would never. (Cue my blush again then, silly me making this more awkward for us both and oh hi anxiety thanks for rearing your ugly head again. Sighing softly, almost embarrassingly so, I give you a kind smile, trying to rein it all in when it felt like you stepped closer. And suddenly it felt really hot..)
Chris:
[Somehow you managed to get more desirable with every minute. And when you made that slip saying you wouldn’t? I grinned probably the most embarrassingly dumb grin I’ve ever grinned in my life. Figuring I might as well go for broke, I stepped a little closer, carefully assessing your face and body language for any resistance as I brought my hand up one more time, this time cupping your cheek as I shook my head} I wouldn’t either. {lets the words hang between us for a few seconds, carefully gauging your reaction for a couple more seconds before whispering] Please don’t slap me. [With that, I took the plunge, leaning in and placing a light kiss to your lips]
Jaiden:
Make it a good one. <That crooked grin wasn't leaving my lips anytime soon. Not when I kept seeing that excited smile grace yours and I reluctantly let your hand slip from my fingers when you finally had a seat in your car. Shutting your door for you, I waited until you rolled your window, giving you a wink first before I dipped my head inside and brushed my lips against your cheek.> Be safe, beautiful. <Righting myself and the world for that matter, I started walking backwards towards the direction of our van, keeping you in my sights for as long I groaned and waited for my sister to get inside. Knowing the drive home was going to met with an awkward as hell conversation.>
Rainey:
(Oh my God.. He was going to do it. One second, I was convincing myself I was never hearing from you again and the next, I was throwing all caution to the wind when your words grand slammed into my brain, finally registering. "Please don't slap me." I melted into a puddle right then and there, legs wobbling, the whole shebang! For that split second in time, I was the heroine of all my books. All those worlds I got lost in and even if it was the smallest of kisses, it meant everything in that moment. Only it wasn't a book I was reading, it was my life. It was ME you were kissing. Very lightly, I returned that kiss, lips slow dancing against yours and I brought my hand up to coax you closer by that soft grasp of your jaw. Completely lost in you until I heard the van door slam and I was catapulted back to my very real reality.) Call me.. (It was a simple request and when you nodded against my lips, ignoring my brother completely, I gave you one last kiss to remember me by.) Night.. (I tried opening my door from behind me, fumbling for the door handle before I finally got it open and I turned to hop inside, coming face to face with my own brother. Mouthing "Not a word!" as he started the van and put it in gear, his groan of disapproval, was laughable and I did just that quietly as we made our way home.) #Kismet #WFW #ForKeeps
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randomoneshotsblog · 4 years
Text
𝗧𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗶𝗻𝗴
Summary: Leon and Y/N want to explore new things 😏
Warnings: daddy kink, spanking, choking, lap dance, filthy stuff ( whichever Leon you want)
Words: 1977
Author's note: it was pretty late when I wrote this so pls dont mind the typos 😪
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So, Leon and I wanted to explore new sexual experiences, but we were both afraid of what each other would decide.
Leon is my soon-to-be-husband and after all of this, our quote was: "Sex only after the marriage." But our sexual desires only grow. I'm always horny, I think I'm the horniest from this relationship. I laugh with all this thinking.
Leon had to go to work today to help Hunnigan. I was pretty sad because I was looking forward to spend the day with him. But well, duty calls.
While I'm watching TV - nothing important is showing at the moment - I think what I could do to make our desires better in bed, don't get me wrong, Leon is very good in bed, he has this dominant personality on bed but I wanted to do this for him, to cheer him up.
An idea passed through my mind, I guess all those times that I spent on my bed only reading fanfics was worth it.
I go to our room and dress myself: jeans, a black t-shirt, white jacket and sneakers.
Guess I'm going shopping.
When I arrive home, Leon is not there yet.
Thank God.
It's still 19p.m, he usually comes home at 20p.m, so I still have time. I put the shopping bags on my bed and then i jump into the shower.
I'm really hoping that Leon likes it, it would be totally awkward if he doesn't like it. Crap, now I'm nervous. That's not good.
"Okay, breath Y/N, breath." I prepare for the big night, I get out of the shower, I put my body cream and then I put this:
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I stop in front of the mirror, staring at myself.
"Y/N you're looking great." I smile to the mirror.
I hear keys clicking, so I quickly take my robe and wear it.
"Y/N babe, where are you?" Leon's voice is muffled by the room closed door - yeah, I closed the door before I got out of the shower, I knew he would show up -
We live in a apartment, with 2 bedrooms but we only use one of them, so I thought in finally using the other one for my plan.
"Wait for me, on the other room."
"Why? Did something happened?"
"No, nothing just wait me there." I hear footsteps far away, then I know he went to the other room.
I tie my hair into a bun, then I put the mine's and his favorite perfume and some make up, not too much, not too heavy, heels too.
What? A girl has to be prepared
Oh God, it's happening. I'm finally doing it. It's not my first time with Leon but I'm afraid of his reaction, will he love it, be awkward about it, hate it? I don't know but I have to give it a shot.
I even prepared a song for it: (whatever song you like)
I get out of the room, nervous. I bet Leon can hear my heels clicking on the floor.
"Y/N is that you?" He asks.
"Yeah, it's me."
Now I'm standing at the door, hesitating to take the knob. A few minutes I opened it.
On the room, there's only a chair and a music player, that I put it there, I guess Leon bite the bait, because he's sat on the chair.
Reminder: I'm still wearing a robe.
I walk towards him, all of my feelings mixed but not showing. Leon's expression it's just confusion.
Leon can smell my scent from awar.
"Is there any event you're going today?" Leon asks while I go behind the chair to play the song, I shrug.
I can feel him, getting up from the chair, faster than the light I turn around and mention to the chair.
"Sit." My dominant part has come. I give him a hard, serious look, that makes him oblige.
I then go back to play the song.
"What are you doing?" Poor Leon, doesn't know what's gonna happen. I want to tell him, but no, it's only about him today.
I take the black towel that was beside the music player and tie his hands, to keep him in place.
"Y/N what are you doing?"
I walk to be in front of him, and give him a smile, I see his face relaxing.
"Just trust me, do you?" He nods.
After that the song starts playing and I go to the bathroom to take off the rope.
The bathroom is beside the chair that Leon is on.
The song starts in a slow and sexy lyrics and I open the door, to start leaning on the doorframe, I start to hear every single word that the music is saying, while I swing my hips slowly for him to watch.
His eyes are shining with desire and his lips and cheeks are red. I like that feeling, of being wanted.
I arch myself on the doorframe, my ass rubbing on the wall.
I give him a devilish smirk.
I'm loving it and he's loving it.
I start to walk towards the chair, without losing the charm.
I start to swing my hips while playing with myself, my breasts, all of my body.
"Babe, please, let me touch you." He pleads, suprising me but I don't show.
I shake my finger as a 'no'. He throws his head back, in frustration.
"Eyes up here, big boy."
I saw him biting his lip and I do the same, that drives him crazy, every single time.
I can already see his bulge, and I'm already horny.
My pussy is on fire, and probably a pool already but I cant and won't stop.
I turn around, him only facing my behind. I sit on lap and start to tease him but grinding my ass on his dick.
He starts to make small growls. I'm rolling and grinding back and forth in slow movements.
"Baby girl." He growls in my ear. I put my head in the crook of his neck. The song is still going.
He's enjoying this as much as I am.
"Please, untie me babe. I can take care of you." He bucks his hips up in my ass.
Ugh, I want him to touch me so bad.
I face him now, I put my legs on each side of his legs and look at his full of lust and blue eyes.
"You like what you see... Sir?" I ask innocently, while he stares at me and gives a smirk.
"I do, actually. You look so hot in that." The music starts to go sexier and I don't know what to do anymore. This man is driving me crazy.
I start grinding myself on his bulge, that's getting bigger and harder by the time.
"Fuck, babe." Leon moans. I noticed that he's eating me with his eyes, enjoying every single part of my body, the way my breasts are so big, the way I grind my hips, everything.
I put my hands on his neck and attack his lips, biting and sucking his bottom lip. Then I start kissing his neck, giving it a hickey, Leon's breath starts to get louder.
I'm loving it.
I pull on his hair, and all I see it's lust on his eyes.
I put my fingers under his shirt and feel his hard muscles.
Leon is whimpering right now.
I stop grinding and go lower to take his cock. Leon throws his head backwards again. I give a smirk. I love doing that to him.
His cock is so soft and tasty. "You're so big, sir." I moan as I start to rub my hands up and down his cock.
"Don't stop, babe." I start to grind myself again to ease a little the aching on my cunt, while I work on his cock.
The song is already finished, you can just hear our moans and breaths.
I decided that it was teasing enough, but I know that when I untie his hands, he's gonna be the dominant one.
I stop working on his cock, and go to his lips, I give entrance to his tongue, while he's kissing me with full desire. I raise my hands behind him to untie him.
Without stopping to kiss him, I feel big hands on my waist and I let out a relived breath.
"You liked that right? Teasing me. I bet your cunt is begging to be fucked right now." I'm wet. His dirty talk always drive me crazy.
He takes me to our bedroom, put me on the bed. Next there it goes his shirt and pants. I stay there, at his mercy. He can do whatever he wants with me.
He hovers me.
"You know you look pretty sexy in that lingerie. But I bet is gonna be sexier when you're cumming on my cock." He gives a smirk, then he starts grinding his bulge to my cunt.
I start moaning, loud. I cant take it anymore.
"Sir, fuck me already, please. No teasing." He kisses my upper lip.
"You're right no more teasing." He finally takes off my lingerie and his boxers.
He sighs when he started to tug on his cock. God, that was a sight.
Next, he hovers me again. I can feel him putting his cock in my cunt, it feels amazing. He starts to play with my nipples. Biting and sucking.
His thrusts are deep but slow.
"Fuck, Leon. Always fucking me so good!" I moan, while he's kissing my neck.
"This cunt is so tight and good, baby. When you got out of the bathroom with that outfit, I just wanted to fuck the life out of you." He says on my ear.
He starts going faster, the bed is cracking and my moans are getting louder.
"You want to be my little whore, right baby? You want me to fuck you all day and night so you cant walk on the next day?"
"Fuck, daddy. You're so good. I love your cock in my cunt." I'm desperate now, I need more, I'm so horny.
"I need more, daddy, please." He grabs my waist and turn me around.
"Ass up." He spanks my ass, I moan louder.
"Yes, scream for them to hear who's fucking so good." He spanks again.
He plugs my ass. "Fuck, your ass is even tighter. Your little whore." He spanks harder, my ass is red already.
"Fuck, daddy. I love when you spank. Do it, I'm a bad girl." Ugh, I'm so dirty. He's started to fasten his pace, I can feel my stomach about to explode.
He puts my face into the mattress, pounding my cunt. "Kitten, likes that right? Yeah, I know she does."
"Harder, please." He trusts harder and pulls my hair making my back to meet his chest.
My pussy is on fire, it's pulsing so much.
"Are you close for daddy? Huh?" He starts to circle my clit and going faster in his pace, while he puts his other hand on my throat.
"Fuck. Fuck. Fuck!" I scream, ready to explode.
"Cum, my whore. Cum for daddy." He says with a last pull of my hair and thrusting in my ass and I let go on his cock. He didn't come yet, so he keeps thrusting into me, while I'm rolling my eyes, enjoying the moment.
"Fuck, Y/N!" He growls while he lets go inside of me.
I fall beside him, and he takes the covers. I start shaking and he envelops his arms around me.
"All of that for this amazing thing that happened." He laughs.
"Yeah I wanted to do something different." I say while playing with his fingers.
"I love you." I say looking at him.
"I love you lots." He kisses my lips gently
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nona-gay-simus-main · 4 years
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Top 10 Worst Tropes in Romance - Part 2
Disclaimer: This is MY opinion, you do you.
Part 1: Here
1. The Child Partner
I’m not talking about literal children, because duh. What I mean is the a person who needs their partner to emotionally parent them.
Maybe it’s just me, but I feel like the whole point of a romantic relationship is to be with an equal. You’re supposed to be teammates, best friends, and lovers.
Of course, I'm not including cases where one partner is disabled or chronically/mentally ill and needs the other to take care of them - that’s an entirely separate thing. 
I'm referring to people (usually cishet men), who constantly need their partner to manage their moods and emotions. They always have some ~trauma~ to manipulate the partner into staying in the relationship in order to keep reassuring them, confirming their self-esteem, and even doing their cooking and cleaning, as if they aren't abled adults with two functioning hands.
That shit sucks!
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Imagine doing that for someone all the time and then also trying to have a kid (or multiple kids) with that person. Not only will you be taking care of your actual child; but also - your partner-child. Stop normalizing lazy, emotionally stunted men. That shit ain't cut no matter how hard his abs are or how big his dick is.
2. “I’ve been in love with you since the first moment we met.”
I don’t know what it is about this trope, but it shows up in many romances and it always makes me uncomfortable. How the hell are you supposed to react to that? 
Oh, you’ve been in love with me since the first time we met? Yikes, my dude.
You can’t even fall in love with someone that fast anyway. You're not in love with the person, you’re in love with your idea of them!
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The only acceptable version of this is the one where it’s more along the lines “I thought I might fall in love with you if I spent any more time with you.” But other than that, I really don't understand why this is a thing?
3. Lust = Love
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not a prude. I’m perfectly fine with couples who have loads and loads of sex. I’m also perfectly fine with casual sex and friends-with-benefits and any other consensual arrangement between adults.
I just get tripped up when pretty much all a couple does is have sex. They have little in common outside of sex, spend little time together when not having sex, and don’t share any hobbies, interests or even conversation topics. Or worse, when they aren’t having sex, they’re fighting. 
If you want your characters to get laid, that’s cool. But if you want me to believe they are also falling in love - you’re gonna have to try a little harder.
4. BDSM = Abuse
Yes, abuse happens under the pretense of BDSM, but BDSM is NOT inherently abusive. It only happens within pre-established boundaries and safe words and with explicit consent. The only people who claim it's abuse, are people who have a vested interest in controlling what women and queer people do with our bodies.
So I really, really hate it when people use “It’s just BDSM, don’t be so uptight” to justify their rapey, abusive love interest’s actions. If the submissive has not already consented, or their consent was obtained through manipulation or intoxication - it’s not meaningful consent.
BDSM is a lot more complex than some of the simplistic catchphrases we use to explain it to the vanillas, and we can discuss those complexities for hours, but at the one thing is definitely true - the Dominant only has as much power as the submissive is willing to give. If they (knowingly) cross a boundary or take power without the consent of the submissive, it’s not power exchange, it’s abuse, pure and simple.
5. "All women want him. All men want to be him"
Really? ALL women? Are you sure?
I hate to tell you this, but some women are exclusively attracted to other women. And some women aren’t attracted to anyone. Some women have low libidos, and some women just don’t prioritize sex and relationships for whatever reason. And some women are in happy, fulfilling monogamous relationships already.
And all men want to BE him? Did you know that some men are attracted to other men? They might want a piece of that too. Or perhaps, they just don’t value being some alpha douchebag and are happy to be their much better-adjusted self. That's a thing.
Can we let this cliché die already? Please?
6. Giving up your dreams for ~love~.
Oh man, this is the worst! And why is it nearly always the woman, who has to make a choice between her career and ~~~LoVe~~?
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So many books/movies etc. start with this powerful career woman and then by the end reduce her to nothing but a trophy to her man. That’s not feminist, it just keeps perpetuating the same tired gender roles.
And I can’t help but think about the future of this relationship. What if it doesn’t work out? Then the partner who the dreams were given up for looks like a jerk, even if they never asked for this.
And even if it works out, the partner who gave up their dream job, or opportunity, or whatever, will always have this “what if” at the back of their mind. Over time, they may even end up resenting their SO, especially if things don’t work out for them career-wise.
Just such a bad trope all around. It’s not romantic, it’s toxic, and co-dependant and I want it to stop.
7. He treats everyone like crap ***but you***.
You know the limitus test to see if someone’s a good person? Look at how they treat people who are “beneath” them. Their servers, the cleaning lady, etc.
If this guy treats servers like crap, treats his friends and family like crap, treats everyone like crap, except for the person whose pants he wants to get in (or wants to keep getting in for the foreseeable future), why are we romanticizing him? He’s a selfish jackass.
You can have a grumpy (but ultimately caring and good-natured) character, that's fine. But if he only treats people like humans when it benefits him - that's not sexy, that's sociopathic.
8. Love Cures All
Ahhh, the worst of them all. Truly, having a character who suffers from mental illness or has a major trauma, but oh look, they got some cuddles from the love interest and now they are all good!
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Just stop, please. It’s so damaging to the people who are going through this, to tell them that all they need to feel better is ~~~LoVe~~~. And if they aren’t getting better? Well, they just haven’t gotten enough ~~~LoVe~~~!
It’s also damaging to the partner - no one should have this much responsibility on their shoulders.
Obviously, the love of a partner, friends, and family can HELP with the healing process, but it’s not enough by itself. Get them some goddamn therapy, please.
9. Accidental Pregnancy
I don’t know about you, but for most people I know, myself included, accidental pregnancy would be an absolute nightmare, not something romantic.
Do you know how bad my entire generation is doing financially? And people use this as a plot device to strengthen the relationship?
Also, relationships get weaker after having a child, not stronger. Babies are cute when they are sleeping, the rest of the time they are crying, screaming messes. Yeah, why wouldn’t sleep deprivation and constantly hurting everywhere strengthen your relationship? 🙄🙄🙄
10. Violent Men
IRL, violent men are scary, not sexy. Even if the violence is never directed at the love interest, chances are that over time it will be. But even if it’s not, why would you ever want to date someone who has the emotional maturity of a pre-schooler?
Because after pre-school, kids tend to learn to solve their problems with their words. But I guess your love interest hasn’t matured past the age of 6, which coincidentally also leads back to the first trope on this list. Charming.
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boredfrenchbread · 4 years
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Spiked!Bakugo x Reader (NSFW)
After passing the necessary requirements to be a hero, everyone in the Hero Course Class 1-A were finally a registered hero. No more of the sideline observation or assisting with clean up, you were in charge of your own actions and responsible for your judgement.
"Finnallyy, we're heroes guyys!", said Uraraka. "Yeah I never thought this day would come sooner, Ribbit" added Tsuyu. As the newly registered heroes jumped around expressing seperate emotions, Yaoyorozu got up in front of everyone to make an announcement. "Attention everyone, in light of our own commencement I am hosting a party at my house to celebrate" she vocalized with her optimistic, bubbly personality. Everyone yelled in excitement and left to their houses to get ready for the freshly announced get together. You were standing by a window checking your phone, when you looked up to see Bakugo, Kirishima and Kaminari all standing around talking about the party.
"Hell yeah, I'll bring a super big keg it's bout time we let loose" exclaimed Kaminari. "Amen brother, come with me to the store we're gonna initiate a manly raid tonight" said Kirishima, as they left running to the nearest store with the best booze. You looked up to see Bakugo shaking his head being pissed as ever. You couldn't help but to blush as his red eyes ignited something fierce inside you. Was it passion...lust..or better yet love? You've always looked up to him and admired him from afar, even though he could be a jerk, but tonight was when you were gonna make yourself noticable. "Hey Bakugo, you wanna hit up Yaomomo's house for the party?, could be pretty fun" you said trying to conceal the oncoming blush. "Not like I'm doing shit else anyways at home, so why the hell not". He walked away heading home, you could only assume, leaving you there with your thoughts. "I better go home and get ready too" you decided as you trekked it home unaware of the night that was waiting for you.
-Time Skip- {11:30 P.M.}
You arrived at Momo's place and ranged the doorbell, much to your surprise the door opened to reveal a semi-drunken Iida standing as if the world was shaking. "Welcome (Y/N) come in, we're all pretty much under the influence, but remember to be cordial and make smart choices as well" he said as he shuffled to a corner mumbling something incoherrent. "So much for Mr. Regulation" you thought. You walked over the the punch bowl to which you can already guess the juice was mixed with alcohol so you poured you a glass and chugged the flavorful liquid, until you were tapped on the shoulder by none other than Bakugo. "Y-You gonna f-fuck-king sit there and hog the d-damn bowl or are you g-gonna let me get a fucking d-drink" he slurred in a drunken haze. "Have at it shit face" you said angrily as you stepped to the side to let the hot head get by. "What di-id you ss-ay, I co-ouldn't hear y-you with all t-that bitchiness in your mou-uth" he said as a retort. You both argued drunkily, attracting the attention of a few people who ignored you both in a short moments notice- all but Mineta who had an idea form in his head. He sneaked up to you both, undetected from your heated quarrel when he slips something in Bakugo's drink. "Something to increase the already obviously sexual tension, hehehe" he laughed sneakily as he walked away back to his own merriment. Bakugo then swallowed the rest of his drink in frustration and stormed away.
Bakugo's POV
"Fucking (Y/N) getting me mad and shit when I'm tryna fucking enjoy myself" he sat outside fuming with anger trying to calm down when he started to feel..very hot. "W-What the fuc-cks wrong with me" he then grabbed his head as he started staggering trying to hold his position. He then started to touch his dick blushing as his senses became strangely more heightened. Knowing what was wrong with him he stood up and looked at the raving house. "Dammit, (Y/N) did this to me didn't she, she must've slipped something in when my drink when we were too busy arguing, damn dumbass". He started to walk towards the door, blushing and smirking, thinking of what he was going to do. "Time to teach that little minx a lesson~"
Your POV
"Stupid Hothead, always mad at the fucking world, what the hell is his problem?!" you said as you walked around drinking, looking at all the smiling faces of your drunk yet elated friends. "At least everyone is happy, mostly drunk but happy" you silently smiled to yourself. "Ugh I feel like I need to touch up" you suggested as you then went to the hallway in the upper part of the house. "HOLY CRAP 7, BATHROOMS!". Walking around made you feel slightly uncomfortable with all this established wealth. You chose a bathroom, entered it, and proceeded to freshen yourself up. You then hear a noise outside the door, more of a mumbling moaning tone. "(Y-Y/NN)" said a familiar drunken voice.
The bathroom door opened as fast as it was closed when your were in front of a vunerable and yet smirking hothead. He locked the door and dimmed the lights and stood towering over you. "Sooo, you thought you could weaken me with such a cheap ass trick, I'll never go down that easy~" he said whispering in your ear as he pressed his body against yours blushing involuntarily while trying to keep focus. You didn't know what he was talking about until you felt a hard sensation pressed against your inner thigh which made you blush profusely biting your lip a little. "I-I don't know what you're talking abo-out Bakugo" you said trying your hardest to fade into the wall from embarressment. "O-Oh you don't know, well I'll just have to remind you~" he said grabbing your breast kissing you roughly, not even giving you a chance to comprehend what was going on, but the sensations you were feeling discarded all reason as you fell into the temptation. He then proceeded to take off your shirt sucking on your hardened nipples making you a moaning mess. Luckily the music was roaring downstairs or you both would have a story to tell when you got out the bathroom. He picks you up and sets you down on the sink and pulls your pants down, looking at the leak fest between your legs. "Wet m-much extra?" he said smirkingly inches away from your heat. You blush and exclaim "Sh-hut-up you-" but before you could comeback, he rips off your soaked garments and licks your clit, tongue moving in every way possible, while at the same time rubbing himself to the sight and the sound of your vunerable frame. "M-mm Bakugo, so fucking g-good" you moaned out loudly. You felt a knot within you ready to burst as your pants started to get more rapidly, "K-atsuki..i'm gonna~" but before you could release he stood back up licking his lips smirking at you as always "Damn you taste good (Y/N), let's see if you sound even better~". He pulls his pants down, dick already hard from his rub session from before and stands in front of you anxious to enter your wet cavern. "This may hurt, but at the same time pain is pleasure~" he said as he slammed into you making you yell out his name in a helpless but yet captivated way. "Ughh Bakugo, harder daddy" you said as you tried your best to catch your breath. "Shit (Y/N) you're so tight" he said as he moved in and out of you at inhuman speeds. After a while you both looked at each other, letting one another know you were both at your limits. "M-mm Bakugo I'm gonna cum" you said weakly. "Me too princess" he said as his movements preceded to get sloppy. You both released at the same time, with you both in a painting frenzy while kissing. You both collapsed on the floor and snuggled up to each other. "(Y/N) I-I um..I love.." he stammered but you knew what he was trying to say. "I love you too Bakugo". You both fell asleep in each other's arms cuddling
Extended Ending:
"Ahhhh that party was a rager" said a awoken Mina as she rose from a couch. Yaomomo should do these more often. She walks up the set of stairs and opens the door to a bathroom to reveal the naked sleeping forms of (Y/N) and Bakugo. She then stands there in awe and slams the door running away screaming in a gossip prone frenzy, waking you both up. "Shit" said an awoken yet drowsy Bakugo, he then looks over at you and brings you to his chest making you blush in your also drowsy state. "Well Teddy Bear, how do are we gonna explain this?"
Hello this is my first post and I'm not sure how Tumblr works yet, so bear with me. I hope you enjoyed it and feel free to request if you want stories
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addytheheartbreaker · 5 years
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Yandere! Joen x Addy x Overprotective! Nicol part 3
(Warning: this part story is angsty and trigger warning themes for only 16+ contains mild swear words, violence, hurt and comfort and death mentioned of the following story that you are reading. Please advice you to not read it if you are uncomfortable of this topic, thank you.)
(This is gunna hurt me as hell, believed me)
*Joen's POV*
Early morning, a perfect time to wake up since I couldn't sleep properly. I haven't got thoses sleeping irritation since my asylum days. Anyway, waking up early on 6:03 am, I wore my comfortable and simple straightjacket that could fit me if he came to happen on my way, the amusement park is still closed yet I'll be back to open on afternoon once I am done with him. I couldn't help but excited to see her.
Teleporting on my way inside to the Dog mansion, I am outside Doll's door. The halls are quiet then I ever expected, I was expecting his step siblings or one of the dog brothers to patrolling or sensing a presence throughout the hallways or around the mansion to guarding any intruder to their property. Thank the lord for having this gift of power to be able to get inside without going to this place with my own feet. That would be the pain in the ass you know?
I teleported again inside with my sleeping beauty covering with transparent curtains around the mattress. My guardian angel is wearing the same pajama dress and she is surrounded with her stuffed toys as some of her other stuffed toys fallen at her bed alone. Picking up those plushies to return back to the owner of these plush toys, I moved the curtain to get her fresh air to her sleep as I sit beside her sleeping form.
She sprawl up straight with her head tilted on her right slumbering so peacefully. Is she supposed to wake up early this hour? She told me she will sometimes wake up so very early either 2 or 5 o'clock in the morning for no reason on her own head. Maybe insomnia or a sleeping disorder? Her own guts that woke her so early? It is complicated to understand herself with those situations to notices her issue. She looks so very tired. Did she wake up all night again or her work from her gang's status checking if her whole empire is under control with Doll still hiatus.
It doesn't matter to find out myself when I look at her as I started fuzzy again with my own feelings for her. I want to confessed to her. To be honest though, she looks just like Jessica Rabbit but much more different and better then I ever have in my life. Addy, my guardian angel, the Doll who saved me, company me my lonely days at the asylum, listen and understand me. But the only one thing that would complete the list is loving me dearly. The real Jessica Rabbit loves her husband Roger Rabbit, not by the looks but loving him for who he is honestly. She doesn't want to loved a man by their looks like some girls attracting to guys with muscles and charming features. Jessica loves Roger of everything about him, making her laugh and make her life happy.
That is what I thought of. I've been imagining myself as Roger Rabbit since that is what everyone called me before and my favorite childhood cartoon character. A silly, goofy and charming rabbit who makes everyone happy with my humorous tricks and magic to entertained them. But what is missing is my own Jessica Rabbit. That is where Addy came in. I noticed of how much she acted just like the female cartoon that I like. I said it many times in my own head: beautiful, lustrous, elegant, kind and gentle, a strong woman, serious, simple and a true babe she is. Doll is somehow a much more better version of Jessica. I liked a girl who is a bit shorter than me, simpler and unique, a good girl who secretly a bad girl inside and a wonderful personality.
Gazing on her sleeping position and hearing my own heart beat ringing through my ears and sweating a little as I gazed on her. Her long hair, her petite body, the feeling of love replaced it with longing and lust. I don't wanna rush things from her, but I couldn't help but gazed on her face until I stare at her lips.
Those pink lip of hers looks very divine and sweet through her well manner and shy/confident voice. I gulp while I keep staring at her lips as she sleeps very still. My heart and mind is telling me that makes me bite my own lip, I couldn't help myself no more as I leaned onto her carefully not to interrupt her slumber. My heart beats much more faster and my own guts twisted in excitement, I couldn't say no to her lips finally I leaned closely to her face with the help of my hand to cup her cheek to get a better angle as I finally kiss her.
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My body twitch like an electricity spreading through my own body and heated up while I kissed her. Just as I thought about her own lips, so sweet and soft like a bunny. I kissed her deeply for more, I wanted more from her yet it so wrong if she woke up witnessing me kissing her without her permission. But I couldn't controlled myself of how much I needed her. God damnit, I could feel something underneath me painfully then my own hand started roaming down to caressed her abdomen and down to her hips.
Is this? Oh fuck it is happening. I wanted to kiss her even further to slip my tongue at her. I need her, no, I WANTED HER SO BADLY! SO BADLY THAT I WANTED HER AS MINE! I MIGHT GO FUCKING INSANE THE MORE I CRAVED THIS DOLL GIRL!
God, why did you make such a precious angel to make me feel this way, make me fallen to her beauty and kindness? She did deserved better then staying with that unstable mutthead, she belong to my wonderland where she can be safe and happy with those horrible people who had broke this masterpiece of a doll. How fucking dare they for destroying her and killing her several times while she is at her own era.
I didn't realized that have been kissing her for like an hour or long. I let go the kiss to stare of her lovely face again with a smile.
I snapped out from my own fantasy to hear someone interrupting the moment that I eagerly prepared for her just until I recognized voice then quickly glared at the person leaning back beside her door.
Oh that fucking asshole.
*Nicol's POV*
I couldn't sleep properly already, it was 6 o'clock in the morning and I can't get back to sleep. I always sleep on 12 o'clock but why didn't I sleep? Maybe I just worried to much? Maybe my problems are coming back? I already go through rehab to stopped drinking alcohol and drugs since 3 years ago. Why can't I sleep already?
I grunt myself angrily as I flop out from my bed as I lazily went my way to the kitchen to drink something to soothes me. Tea would be great to calm my nerves which only takes 15 minutes to prepared it. *sigh* such a nice aroma and taste, a bit bitter if I wish to add suger. Suddenly something feels wrong, very wrong. It felt like someone is inside the mansion unawared and possessive. I quickly finished my tea to investigate who the hell invaded my territory without my permission.
To my horror when I used my dog instinct to track down leading to Dollface's room. Prepared and ready myself in combat from the door and do a sneak attack to protect her. No one is going to hurt or kill my Dollface from me, I'll bite who evers faces to shreds real hard till I could taste copper tingling through my tongue.
The horror to my eyes suddenly changed into anger quickly. I quietly lean back beside the door, cross my arms, wearing my death stare look as I speak in a cold tone.
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"What are you doing here, Rabbit?"
*No ones POV*
Joen glared straight into Nicol's eyes. Their eyes connected as sharp as a knife ready to stab to the death. Giving them silence between the two most former dangerous animals since Rivalry era, the two couldn't take their eyes off just until Dog's death stare breaks to analyzed what is going on. The Rabbit stands up from Doll's bed to greet him with his signature friendly greeting to pretend he had came in too early even if it means lying on his face.
Joen: ah, Nicol Mcgilles! I was just came here to check on Doll if she is safe. Well I guess she is still sleeping, I was wondering if yo-
Nicol: Cut the crap and stop lying to me Joen Roger. I know your game we used to played you Trickster.
Joen: *thought* did he just insult me? Wow, what a bastard he is. Well that is rude of you while I explained ya. *chuckles* if you could acted more nicely to me, I could have explained to you, ya crappy dogshit.
Nicol: *thought* grr that son of a- oh I knew he had hide something behind my back. That face that he was wearing. I repeat that again Psycho Bunny. What are you doing in Addy's room? Answer me with no shitty dodges yo got that?
The conversation became intense inside Addy's room, the atmosphere is not safe when the two keep their voices louder inside her room almost waking her up. Joen notices her movement still haven't waking up from their argument as the rabbit man dodges the dog man with a excuse.
Joen: why don't we go somewhere other than having our conversation here. Its very inappropriate for us to have this chitchat of ours while Doll is still asleep.
Both look down to checked Addy moving her head a little due to the noise which almost caught them from their loud voices if it keeps on going here. It is a good idea to go somewhere, but this pissed Nicol since she needed to stop the two from fighting. He hates to unleash his oldself back, but he had no choice however, he couldn't help but wanting to beat up Rabbit a lesson or two.
Nicol: yeah, good idea. Come this way Psycho Bunny, I'll escort you somewhere open to continue our discussion peacefully.
The two left Addy's room carefully not to disturbed her. Nicol escorted Joen through the hallways, guiding him the room much more open and a good choice to echo outside if anything happened, the dance room. That is where Nicol teaching Addy to dance since she haven't dance for a longest time and trained her to be ready for his performance in the Masked Singer. Two men face to face like a tournament ready to a fist fight, the two begin continuing their conversation earlier.
Nicol: okey where are we? Oh yes, What are you doing at Addy's room? Like I said, no shitty dodges for your nonsense of a lie. You are really bad at lying.
Joen: yeah, yeah I heard ya loud and clear Dog. I'm just here to get something what is mine.
Nicol: and that it?
Joen: taking Addy for myself. You actually just neglecting and forgetting Doll for a reason, for a reason of what? Your issues? your old self has coming back to ya? Oh that's right, your are just as horrible of day care as your old fucker doing when he is alive!
Nicol: don't you fucking dare mentioning the old geezer in this conversation, I am not like my ex master like that! I did what I did for her sake alone!
Joen: your sake, my ass! That is why you are getting in my way since you are a selfish, heartless and irresponsible motherfucker to leave her behind almost to her death!
Nicol: I don't understand Joen! What is it have to do with Addy anyway god damnit? Yes, I failed to know her unstable mentality is getting worse and her mental breakdown but I don't get the fact you kissed her. What is it have to do with her after I saw you kissing her?!
Joen: you always getting in my fucking way when you are beside her! I'm jealous for your closeness to Addy just like your own jealous of me and my brother's healing and strong bond together! I wanted her so badly to become as mine yet you happen to keeping her from me!
Nicol: *realization* are you saying you have a crush on Addy? Dude, do you have any fucking idea what you are doing right now with your head? You can't just kiss her while she is asleep. Just don't come near Addy with those creepy-
Joen: *thought* and that is what I am trying to fucking telling ya, yo mindless asshole! Don't you take my girl away from me!!! *grip tighten hands through raged* Fuck this and fuck you Nicolas! I'm taking her myself!!!
To be continue.... Coming up....
Joen's ending
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maevelin · 7 years
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I have no objections with people liking Nesta but I don't understand why people would ever want Cassian to get with a woman like Nesta. He deserves someone better than anyone that is set on demeaning him. He is lighthearted and a good person. He deserves better.
Sigh…you got me in quite a mood dear anon so deep breath and rant ahead.
You have been warned.
So...I never understood the concept of love being a reward for someone’s ‘good’ form, character or behavior. And I am not even going to get into the whole glamorization of love as an emotion and the concept that is something solely good and pure and only ‘good’ people and certain ‘characters’ and ‘snowflakes’ experience it or should experience it.
I will stand on something different though.
People are not objects and trophies and prizes that one should get for being good and for deserving ‘better’ (and BTW, I will get to that too in a while).
Relationships are not about deserving and about perfection and about what works on paper. Relationships can come in many forms and bonds and it is about people that find something in someone else and then they work through their shit (and in this case both Nesta and Cassian have a lot shit to work through) because they care enough to make their relationship work. Because you get to fall in love for many reasons and you get to love the flaws and the imperfections. You get to like a person because you are attracted to them for whatever reason logical or illogical. Because they intrigue you. Because of lust or intense emotion. Because they take you by surprise. Because romance usually is about personal conflict and growth and collision. Because in fiction this brings drama and it is interesting for many people especially when it includes complicated characters with many layers and depth that help each other’s characterization progress and development in many ways.
But hey. I get not liking a character or a ship. It is your prerogative. You might not like the chemistry of two characters. You might not get it. You might be allergic to it. You might not care for it. You might not understand it. You might hate it. You might not be able to tolerate the story or a character or a concept. It is your right. I am not here to dictate to you what to like and what not to like. Something is not your cup or tea and your personal taste is different from that of another person. Different strokes for different folks and all that.
But here you are in my ask box. I get not liking a ship but why would you come to the blog of someone that likes it with such comments? What do you gain? Stick to your lane and ship and let others ship.
Also…seriously…I am in awe.
You are here to tell me that the half a millennia winged Illyrian Fae warrior who is basically a LORD OF FREAKING WAR that is leaving mountains of corpses in the battlefields and has been shedding blood for centuries is not deserving of a 20-22 year old woman with limited experience that she is just start beginning to understand what life is after leading a very restricted and limited one. This is what you are telling me right? That the man that brings horror and is capable and able to bring nations to their knees and is known by the freaking Bone Carver as the Lord of Bloodshed is not deserving of a …young girl while he is the winning prize in the lottery for Nesta. Am I getting this right?
The superficial way people view certain characters astonishes me.
Cassian is not a ray of sunshine and not an innocent lighthearted and most of all balanced person. Cassian is one of my most favorite characters in the acotar series (Top Five easily). But he, as many characters of the book, is a grey character that can often be amoral. You don’t get to become THE General of the Night Court and the commander of the Illyrian forces and part of the Inner Circle by being solely moral and good and …nice.
Cassian is dangerous. Like Alpha Male dangerous. He is an experienced man. An experienced OLD man. The fact that he looks hot and young and is energetic with a six pack does not change his age or his position in life or who he is. And if you put that in contrast with a young girl with Nesta’s history that has not even traveled the world yet -while this was her dream- then who ‘deserves’ who can become a very long argument.
Cassian is indeed a good man but he is carrying a load of crap and baggage on his shoulders. He is over half a millennia old. He is a FREAKING GENERAL from crying out loud. The fact that he cracks jokes and is supportive of his family and friends does not take away all the blood he had shed or the scars that has left on him (and he will bring those scars to whatever relationship he enters). It does not take away that the bone carver called him the Lord of Bloodshed. Cassian is a killer. A professional one at that. No matter how noble he is (and he is) that does not change that it takes a certain kind of bloodthirsty savageness and mindset to rise to where he is now. Cassian views fighting and cutting through people as if it is an art. He walks hand in hand with death. He commands the Illyrian forces of the Night Court.
For centuries he is mixed to a dysfunctional emotional triangle with both of his best friends in a way that hurts one of his two brothers -because this is what Azriel is for him- and he is in a complicated mess with Morrigan. He has codependency issues with Morrigan, Rhysand and Azriel. He has shown to have suicidal tendencies (add homicidal to that too). He is not all sunshine and charm and jokes. He goes to the battlefield to kill and to count the dead and inform their families. It takes a certain kind of heart and soul and violence to wage war. To kill people. To do that for half a millennia. He is feared and terrifies his enemies. He has self esteem issues and even depression signs (as surprise surprise so does Nesta). He is haunted by ghosts of the past. He is afraid of commitment. He is menacing. He has sent monsters into the prison of the Night Court. He is ready to cut through his enemies like butter or condemn them to an eternity of imprisonment.
He has lived lifetimes. He has experience both on the light side of life and the dark side of life.
Say what you like about Nesta and her behavior but in the end she is just a..girl. She is not experienced with life or men for that matter. She has been sexually assaulted and sheltered. She wanted to travel but did not got a chance. She is very young and thrown in a life and nature she had not wanted. How old is she really? 20-22? And for you a 22 year old -tops- girl with limited life experience does not deserve a 500+ years old man because that man is somehow an optimist and an extrovert and so good? You are seriously going with that right now?
Because Cassian needs to be coddled and a bitch like Nesta is not a good fit for …him? Because a man needs …deserves…as sweet woman as a reward right? Because a woman has to apologize for everything in her character and become less so to fit the needs of a man because of what he deserves and if not then...she does not deserve him. (My mind’s wires are short cutting right now I kid you not).
If anything it would be more healthy for Nesta to not get involved with a man like Cassian until she has some decades at least on her back and a lot more experience.
Many people say that Nesta is mean with Cassian. And she has bitter outbursts with him that is for sure true up to an extent but no one ever pointed out how Cassian when he first met Nesta had already formed an opinion over her as if he had the right to do so only because his new friend (which he barely really knew) told him (mostly alluded) some things that did not involve him in any way. From the very start Cassian had judged Nesta and played judge and jury with her and had condemned her without even exchanging a word with her. Not even Rhysand that was Feyre’s mate did that.
Nesta was right to tell him that “You know nothing about who I am, and what I’ve done and what I want.“
Why wouldn’t Nesta be hostile with him? The guy has boundaries issues. And was quick to judge her. He is a centuries years old persistent (borderline obsessed) Fae male that …can’t stay away. Romance aside let us not start glamorizing certain people and acting as if Cassian is perfect. He is not. He has flaws. There are no saints and sinners in this equation. Nesta has not treated Cassian right all the time but Cassian has not always treated Nesta right either. And if we take their character traits into account this was bound to happen.
Yes Nesta is an asshole. But guess what? Cassian is an asshole too. He taunts, he mocks, he insults, he provokes, he uses his sexual experience as a weapon of choice, he intimidates, his uses his body as a way to make others step back, he throws tantrums, he hides behind jokes, he is reckless, he is hard. In the first sign of true intimacy he backs down and alienates people. He has been all those things with Nesta. He originally was surprised and even took offense because Nesta ignored his good looks for crying out loud. Cassian even in Wings and Embers tried to intimidate her while he barely knew her. A human 22 year old girl that could crash with his little finger while he could tell that she had no experience in physical combat or men. He used his nature, his body, his words to make Nesta less of who she was. To make her feel uncomfortable. His game was less than honorable back then. And when that did not work his infatuation started to run deeper and they both entered a game of push and pull and love-anger/hate and bickering and…understanding.
That does not make him a bad person. He is a good man. A messed up mortally grey good man with honor. In the same way Nesta is also a good woman.  A messed up angry woman with a moral code that for getting to see you need to watch past the surface. A woman that got inspired by Feyre’s and Cassian’s honor and made Cassian proud. A proud woman that has made mistakes but is learning from them and tries to better herself with actions. Something that Cassian sees and respects and maybe even has also done in his long life because everyone starts from somewhere and faces difficulties and trauma in different ways and learns and grows and moves on.
Nesta grew up with the same superstitions Feyre grew up when it came to Fae people. Do you remember how Feyre herself acted with the Fae at the very beginning before she grew to know them? And yet Nesta allowed Fae men to get into her home. Nesta’s interest when it came to Cassian himself surpassed her prejudices before she was even thrown to the Cauldron and turned to High Fae herself.
Nesta was traumatized after been thrown in the Cauldron. And so was Cassian when he had his wings shredded… but he could not stay away from Nesta despite the boundaries she was trying to put between them. It was his choice to go over to her over and over again despite being rejected. No one from the fandom ever speaks of the trauma Nesta had been subjected too and how Cassian’s needs should not surpass her needs over this. But sure.. Nesta is mean so Cassian’s needs must go first. But just maybe this is not about romance or about what a man deserves. This is not about Cassian getting to feel better. And yet somehow this is what it all ends up too.
Introvert vs Extrovert. Young age vs Old age. Man vs Woman. A man that has lived his life to the fullest vs a woman that has not yet lived. Who deserves who.
Does Cassian deserve Nesta? Does Nesta deserve Cassian?
In my opinion who deserves who is a bullshit argument to make for this sort of subject. I can give you a dissertation of why Cassian does not deserve Nesta too. Or why he does deserve her. And vice versa for the other way around.
Truth is that in my opinion they complete each other. It is not just opposites attract. Cassian found an equal in Nesta despite their differences (that are many). Mentally and intellectually they are equal and similar even.
Blade and fire made flesh. Death made flesh. They fit each other.
Cassian is a killing machine and Nesta now holds death in her fingertips. While Cassian always walked in death. But more so aside those parallels that mirror each other they also click as characters.
Cassian shares the same values with Nesta. The same need to protect others. Nesta kept saying how she wanted to help families and children. Cassian has the same view point with her. It is in his very core the need to protect others and this was in the end what Nesta was ready to sacrifice herself for.
Nesta that is so cold on the outside because she feels everything more intense than any other in the inside. Cassian that is so easy going on the outside because he is broken in the inside. Nesta that uses cruel words as a shield. Cassian that uses jokes as an armor. Nesta that hides her emotions and vulnerabilities. Cassian that does the same in different ways. Nesta that is afraid to let others in. Cassian that observes everything both in the battlefield and outside of it. Nesta that scares people. Cassian that is not and could never be afraid of her. Cassian that intimidates people. Nesta that refuses to be intimidated by him. Nesta that throws insults. Cassian that throws tantrums. Cassian that turns his pain to playfulness and his weakness to anger and battle. Nesta that does not allow anyone to see her as weak and turns her rage to ice and her pain to faux indifference and hostility. Cassian that gets his power from his warrior nature and training. Nesta that wants to be empowered and get agency in different ways. Cassian that leans to order and anarchy. Nesta that leans to order and freedom. Nesta that is now the emissary of the Night court. The bridge of the human world with the Fae world trying to balance an understanding between two worlds. Cassian that is always trying to create an understanding between the Illyrians and the rest of High Fae and the man that becomes a bridge when he has a death count in paper and has to inform all the families of the lost. Nesta that her power is now connected with death. Cassian that has been walking in death. Nesta that is too serious. Cassian that is too aloof. Nesta that is too proud and disdainful and willful. Cassian that is arrogant and cocky and prideful. Nesta that is all about manners and propriety. Cassian that is insolent and all about wrecking buildings. Cassian that is serious when needs to be and Nesta that needs to relax and laugh more. Nesta that prefers a book and solitude and Cassian that in silent moments shows a more grounded version of himself. Cassian that people overlook his intelligence. Nesta that people overlook her humanity. Cassian born in a world that does not value bastards. Nesta born in a world that does not value women. Nesta that does not let others in. Cassian that is not making any serious commitments and relationships. Nesta that is so afraid of what she feels for Cassian that prefers to keep him in arm’s lengths using insults and distance and Cassian that is so terrified of what he feels for Nesta that gets completely out of sync when she shows him tenderness and interest. Cassian, the Prince of Bastards, that wanted to find his place in the world and be a man with value despite his heritage and Nesta, the terrible Queen, that after loss and building emotional walls wanted to go out to the world and see what a woman could so and leave her mark in the world. Nesta and Cassian that both dream of a better more equal world for bastards, children and women. The same coin from different sides.
And really this is not about a competition. You do not fall in love with someone that is perfect for you in theory. You get to fall in love with ...people. With imperfect people. You get to love them exactly due to those imperfections that make then unique. I cannot stress enough that this is not a matter of what someone ‘deserves’. It is about what someone feels. It is about what makes a heart tick. It could be the most weird combination. It could be insane. And volatile. And easy going or difficult until it aches. In the end it is all about understanding and Nesta and Cassian can understand each in a deep level that is mostly instinctual at this point. It is lust and attraction and sexual tension (like …seriously!) and struggle (because nothing that is worth it comes easy in life) and it is understanding and feeling and silent communication and attraction in all levels.
And guess what… Cassian deserves this. He deserves a person that won’t use him as a sexual object so to get out of predicament and then use him as a shield against his best friend and create conflict in him and in the relationships that define him. Cassian deserves a person that won’t be afraid to stand up against him and with him. That won’t be charmed by his superficial sexiness and distractions. That will be an equal to him. That will shout to him miles away to get him out of danger and he will hear that voice calling him to safety. Cassian deserves a touch. Deserves to fall in love. To have a person that can see when he is hurt. Cassian deserves to get a chance with the woman he is choosing to fight with him and die with him and the woman that he is ready to search to the other life just so to have a chance with her and not regret not spending time with her. The woman that when he in bleeding and unconscious he will try to defend till his last breath. The woman that has a name that he keeps hearing in the wind. Cassian deserves a person that can see beyond his facade. Nesta that understands how dangerous and how noble Cassian is because he sees what others don’t. Because he sees beyond the surface. Because he sees who truly Nesta is. And who Nesta is is someone that Cassian not only wants but would be damn lucky to have. A woman that will stand up next to him and won’t allow anyone to offend him and she won’t judge him for his past. A woman that will surprise him. A woman that will shield him with her body against death itself. A woman that will try to carry him away from danger. And if she can’t help him she will stay with him till the end. She won’t run. She won’t lie. She won’t be dishonest. She won’t see him as a charity case. She will stay for the good and the bad and for hell itself. Cassian has been a bastard that had found family to the inner circle of the Night Court and friends and family but something has always been missing. A sense of true belonging. To have someone stay with him as the world burns and protect him as he protects others. To have someone truly understand him and use honest actions instead of words. Yes Nesta and Cassian are in a clash of wills but also in a clash of hearts.
But sure thing. Cassian surely does not deserve this and I do not get why people like Nesta and Cassian as a ship either.
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