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#don't worry I won't write it but it's definitely made me mad enough to consider it
ahsxual · 4 years
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Sassy Girl
Pairing: L!Joker x Fem!Reader
Summary: J finally took you to a meeting with his men. After seeing you agitated, he decides to confront you about it once you leave.
Genre: Smut
Warnings: Sir kink, spanking, dom/sub, vaginal sex, nipple play, degradation, rough kissing, slightly exhibitionism, dirty talk, breath play (nothing too serious), sassy reader, swearing
Word Count: 3,3k
A/N: soo me and @harlequinjoke were role-playing about L!Joker and Harley Quinn, and I really liked the idea, so I decided to write something about it <3 It's my first time writing about J (internally shaking). I got inspired by the incredible, unique and talented @jokerslilhyena, so I hope I get more comfortable with time writing him, because I REALLY love that chaotic bastard 💜💚
Gif Credits: @antonija89
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You and J had an uncommon relationship: you weren't considered his girlfriend and vice-versa, however you were together. It was a totally different experience dating someone so chaotic as him, someone so dangerous and unpredictable. In the beggining, you actually were scared that he would hurt you, however he has proved the opposite: whenever you argued, he would break the first thing he found, scream or even leave for a long time... but he never would lay a hand on you and would always come back, eventually. However, he never apologized, not directly. He was extremely aggressive and reckless towards others, but with you... he wasn’t any of that. Of course he was very proud, would still throw tantrums here and there and sometimes he seemed indifferent, especially when the subject was about affection. Nevertheless, he loves you in a way that, even if it’s strange and unreal to others, he still shows you that he cares for you, that he doesn’t want to make you feel bad and he does anything to protect you from the rude and injustice world you live in. For you, it’s his "special" way to love and honestly, you are fine with it, since he always comes back to you and keeps you alive and safe.
Sometimes you wondered how did you get where you were, having a "relationship" with the one and only prince of crime, the one that everyone fears with all their being. But you, you were unordinary and different from others... and that's what caught his attention. You knew you wouldn't be judge by him, wether it was physically or mentally.
You always had a thing for villains, J being the most dangerous and strategically intelligent of them all: you saw J as someone who doesn't care about other's opinions, someone courageous enough to prove and make the world wrong, someone who isn't afraid to express himself and be the way he was meant to be... the way life made him. You deeply admire all those features about him: his confidence, his intelligence, his insight...
Today was an unexpected day: you wanted to see how J worked, how he organized and "planned" his ideas, how the "bad guy" life was. J, of course, didn't let you go... at first. He said that it didn't make sense for you to join him and he didn't want to get distracted by you, but you knew that was not the whole truth. J didn't want to show his only weakness to others, especially to dangerous people. As intelligent and practical he could be, he was just one man, so he avoided dealing with even more problems, mainly because you were the one who would be in danger. Nevertheless, you insisted, telling him that he didn't need to present you as someone he was having a case with, just a girl who wants to be apart of his "plan".
J knew you would bother him about that until he accept it, so today he finally gave you the answer you were dying for to hear.
"Oh... really? You won't argue with me about this anymore?" you were surprised for him letting you go.
"What do ya want me to do, huh? You were pressuring me all the time about it, so this is the only way to ah... end this." he was obviously annoyed, but he wanted to do that favor to you too. Maybe it wouldn't be as bad as he thought, and it would be one time only, so it was not a big deal.
"Thanks, J! I knew you wouldn't be such a daddy, it means a lot to me!" he smirked before you hugged him by the neck, something he was not expecting. He just tapped your back with his gloved hand in response, a gesture meaning you were welcome.
"Come on bunny, I can't be late. The boss have always to show up before his ah... employees." he joked, earning a laugh from you. You quickly put some comfortable shorts and a top that slightly showed your cleavage.
"I'm ready, time to go!" you said excitedly. J noticed that your outfit wasn't the most appropriate, but he didn't have time to tell you to change into something that wouldn't show too much skin. He thinks that you should cover the first piece of your neck's skin, to the tip of your toe. J was a possessive man to that extent... and you were a teasing to that extent too.
When you entered J's stolen car, you noticed how the back seats were spacious... immediately your dirty thoughts signaled their arrival, which made you unconsciously bit your lip slowly. Your clown didn't miss it, being as observant as he was, and instantly thought this wasn't a good idea... at all.
"Ya better stop doing that with your ah... lip, doll. Ya better behave or I will make ya be sorry later." he said in a serious tone. The sexual tension between you two was always evident, something that both of you loved and needed: J could have his way with you, respecting your limits obviously, and you would just enjoy the sex as much as he did, since no other man could dominate and have his way with you the way he did... you were his little masochist, his strong woman that simultaneously was so easy to break. He was obcessed with you: you were his drug, his only weakness, his vicious, his significant other... you just completed him, even though he never told you that, he definitely proved it to you everyday.
You usually have an answer for everything he says, but now you remained quite to not make things worse for both of you. You had to keep that fire inside your core hidden from his men or there would be consequences... after all, he is a man of his word.
You finally arrived to the place where the meeting would occur: it was an abandoned building as expected; around it, was nothing more than grit and some old and rotten cars; the sky was almost black, the stars and moon being the only ones lightning the establishment; there were two men located at the front door of the same big building, and surely there were others in the rear entrance. You couldn’t deny you were feeling nervous. As much as sometimes you wished, you couldn't be completely fearless like J.
"Don't worry doll, ya don't need to be afraid. If something goes wrong, we ah... always have a backup." he confidently said, showing you the inside of his coat covered in bombs and grenades. You laughed once again.
"Sure you do, J. You wouldn't be you if you didn't have it." you said while winking at him. He smirked before getting out of the car.
You knew from now on, until the meeting is over, he would act differently: he couldn't have the reputation of being a murderous clown with a soft spot for his little bunny. No one would take him seriously once that was revealed, and you understood it perfectly.
Once you arrived at the front door, where the two men were, they looked strangely at you and then at J.
"Will ya stay there looking at me like the ah... dick heads you are, or ya will let me pass already, huh?" J was expecting this reaction from them, yet his acknowledge didn't prevent him from being annoyed: he wasn't in the mood to give explanations to anyone, mainly to his temporarily needed men. The two men looked at each other, before nodding towards their boss and letting you both pass the tall, rigid door.
The moment you entered the room, you saw all of his men in their seats, already prepared for their meeting with their boss... and his company.
"Who's that?" a man asked boldly.
"She's our ah... tonight's special guest. She will help us with our mission by dealing with the ah... cops." he lied, successfully convencing them. He knew they wouldn't be suspicious about it, since that was his task. You sitted right next to him, noticing the side glances from some men.
While time passed and J talked about his "plan", you deeply admired how attractive he looked: he was so confident, fearless, so right about what he was saying and doing... it made you think how is it possible for a single man to be so strategic and dominant with others... and when J was with you, it was impossible not getting completely horny, feeling hot as hell and being completely at his mercy, gladly. He obviously noticed your long glances in his direction and felt how your legs would rub shamelessly against each other under the table, where only he could catch your signals, since you were almost glued to each other.
"Any questions about what I just said?" he asked after explaining everything that should be done. His men just nodded in return. "Good. Tomorrow morning, 9:30 am. I will be ah... extremely upset if any of you arrive late. And trust me, gentlemen, you wouldn't like to see me mad." he then got up, grabbing your arm and pulling you in front of him while you were walking, which surprised you. Once you approached the car, he opened the back door and pushed you roughly into the back seat, making you lay down with him above you after removing his long purple coat covered in grenades into the passenger seat.
"Now, now... would ya explain me what you were ah... doing back there, huh? Ya seemed very... restless during the reunion, don't ya think... bunny?" he whispered one of your favorite nicknames given by him into your ear, being so close that you could see every little and precise detail on his face: you could feel his hot breath against your skin and see his pupils dilating more and more by every passed second. J decided to confront you about it, wanting you to admit everything you did back there right in front of his face... and you would be the best liar if you said he didn't give you chills all over your body, especially making your core dripping from excitement and eagerness.
"I-I wasn't doing anything, I was just listening to y-"
"Ata-tada, ya don't wanna go that way, doll. You ah... know very well that I don't like when people lie on my face, especially you... not-one-bit." he madly said, pressing firmly the last words with his skilled tongue. Oh, how you loved seeing your psychotic clown having his way with you...
"What do you want me to say J, huh?? That yes, I was feeling horny like a goddamm whore just from seeing you leading those assholes, that I couldn't stop looking and admiring you?? That I couldn't even countain myself from touching myself like a fucking needy virgin?!" you couldn't take it anymore, so you spelled it out so he could make a move as soon as possible... because you knew very well: if you aren't honest with him and don't tell him what you desire, he will tease until you cry and beg desperately for him to touch you... and when that happens, J won't do anything until you admit it. That's how provocative and bastardous he was... but you loved it. J seemed pleased with your answer, since he grabbed you hardly by your hair and pushed you for a clumsily and rough kiss. You wanted to test his limits a little further, so when you felt his tongue against your lower lip, you didn't give him the permission to explore your mouth like he wished. By this, he bit your lower lip hard enough to draw some blood, showing how you couldn't be in control. If you even tried, you would suffer the consequences. You groaned while you tasted your own blood, seeing his face lighten once he saw and tasted the blood himself. His eyes were totally dark now, just like his soul and heart: you knew how much he loved pain and blood, something that was fully attached to his being.
"Ya really know how to make me crazy, Y/n. And ya know as well that has ah... price to pay, dontcha?" you simply nodded, wanting to feel the little pleasure he was giving to you. Suddenly you felt your neck being forcely grabbed by a gloved hand. "I want a strict answer." he said with a deep and low tone, making goosebumps all over your skin.
"Y-yes..." you moaned quietly.
"I couldn't hear ya. Yes what?" he asked even more serious now, pressing harder into your neck, but not enough to cut your air completely. The car door was still open, so if you spoke or moaned too loud, his men would hear you.
"Y-yes Sir!!" you shamelessly spoke loudly. J didn't closed the door for some reason, so why would you care?
"Hmm that's what I like to hear, my good little obedient girl..." he then rubbed his hips hardly into yours, moving his lips towards your neck while sucking and biting until it was red and purple. "You look amazing with those painted on ya, doll. The purple ah... suits you perfectly." he praised you, slowly moving to your already harden nipples. J grabbed your top and ripped it off, but you couldn't care less about it. Luckily, it wasn't your favorite. You didn't own a bra, grabbing his attention immediately. "Hmm someone hasn't been behaving like they should. Ya know what happens to ah... naughty and miss-behaving girls, dontcha doll? Huh?" he dangerously spoke, while pinching your nipples hard enough to give you immense pleasure and the right amount of pain.
"N-no sir, I don't..." you eagerly answered, afraid and excited at the same time about what it would happen next. He smirked at you, his yellow teeth now red from your blood, a view that would give nightmares to anyone, but it only made you wetter. J slowly approached you, whispering dangerously into your hear.
"They get punished." the only thing you knew was being brutally turned over, making your ass being exposed after he ripped your shorts as well.
"No, p-please sir!! I promise I will be a good girl..." you cried, which didn't affect him at all.
"Too late for apologies now, sweet cheeks." suddenly you felt a hard spank into your right ass cheek. "Count until five to me, doll. If ya don't, I will start over... you already know the rules." you knew you had to endure your punishment or it would be much worse. Obviously he was doing this because he knew you liked it as much as he did: if not, you would never be in the position you were right now. You didn't have a choice but to count every spank he gave you, involuntary missing on the fourth, which meant he would have to do everything over again.
"Five!!" you screamed, your ass now painted in red and some shades of purple. You felt the burning sensation so intensely, you could swear your butt was actually on fire. Yet you wouldn't complain, since you loved the feeling of burnt skin after his spankings. "P-please sir, just fuck me, I'm begging you!! I-I will do anything to please you, anything!!" you cried harder, both of you knowing those tears were nothing but a reaction of the pleasure you were feeling and wanted to feel. J thought for a moment if he should make you beg for him a little more, or have mercy. After all, he was just eager was you were, yet he loves to play with you first more than anything.
He suddenly pressed his cock against your dripping entrance, without give you time to adjust to him. It wasn't too much hard to take him, since you were so wet, he could slide inside you extremely easily. But that didn't prevent you from feeling the pain right after, when he grabbed your hips harder than ever and fucked you faster than the light itself. His nails were breaking your skin with each deep thrust he did, more blood flooding down your thighs. J thought in taking his knife to cut you, but he preferred to do it when the two of you were in your house by yourselves, where he had the whole time he needed to really play with you.
"F-fuck!! Please J, don't stop!!" he loved how easily it was to make you cum. You once told him in your first times it would take time for you to cum, because you were shy and insecure at the beginning. But ohh, how that changed... for better, surely. And you know he was the responsible for making you feel comfortable about it: J is the only man who gives you pure pleasure, without making you feel ashamed. After all, he is not a monster like everyone, incluinding batman, thinks. He's just... a man ahead of the curve.
He grabbed your hair forcely with his left gloved hand, while his right one came directly to rub your clit hard.
"Cum for me, you fucking slut. Show me how such a needy whore you are, let me feel ya squeeze my cock hard while I fuck ya until you can't fucking walk tomorrow." he groaned into your hear, his tone much lower than before. That was enough to make you cum right there, even if he wouldn't touch you at all.
"Ohh f-fuck, I'm gonna cum J!!" you moaned loudly before cumming hard on his thick, merciless cock. You felt his dick twisting inside you, while his pace became sloppy, faster and harder, a sign that he was about to cum.
"I'm going to fill that fucking tight pussy and you will keep my cum inside of ya, do ya hear me?!" he loudly demanded, wanting to hear your response before he cums.
"Y-yes sir!! I-I will keep every last drop of you inside me, please just cum inside me, please... I'm begging you!" and that was it. J came deeply inside you while groaning like a wild animal.
The two of you laid there to get some air, him being on top of you, supporting some of his height with his elbows to not crush you. You gently massaged his back in a comforting way, your code to let him know you enjoyed your moment and were okay, that he didn't hurt you badly.
"Wow, that was... amazing. I should come to your meetings more often." he laughed at this, finally looking into your eyes.
"Ya really aren't innocent as ya seem to be doll, and I really like to see that ah... sassy side of yours. We should discuss that after our... second round when we get back home, huh? I mean, if ya can be able to speak after that." you playfully punched him on his arm while laughing, already feeling excited again.
"We will see about that, then. Let's just get home now, can't wait for that promised second round." you winked at him, earning a big smirk from clown.
"I'm sure they know now that ya aren't just some ah... chick apart of the mission."
"Well, at least they know now that they don't have a chance with me, even if they tried." after hearing that, he kissed you passionately in his own way, grabbing your ass in the process, before moving to the front seat so he could drive home to where both of you will continue your so promised round two.
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mevekagvain · 3 years
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Chapter 93 - Fancy chair, love it.
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- So my theory is that Raizel just never learnt how to write in Lukedonian either.
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- Tbh the janitor is suspicious. Like how hard was he googling M-21?
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Chapter 94 - SUYIIIIIIIIIIII
- Ah geez the first of the racistly depicted characters.
Chapter 96 - Suyi getting mad at the kids for complaining about Hansu is so funny like when she first appears you think she's perhaps a stuck up celebrity or a pushover but it turns out she's just a really sweet friend.
- Suyi being stunned by Rai's looks but not falling for him (same with Yuna) is one of the things I always liked about Noblesse. Like sure in the first meeting they get blushy but I'll just jot that down to the inherent beauty of nobles since I can't relate to it at all.
Chapter 97 - Frankenstein's house always being stocked with so much food because the kids just started coming over daily is hilarious. Even funnier since Frankenstein obviously thinks it's overkill but is the one stocking up anyway.
Chapter 98 - Regis and Seira 🥺 Seira's og outfit was the best one she had like it only goes downhill from here folks.
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Chapter 99 - It would have been so funny if Frankenstein went "they must be cosplayers" instead of realising the two were nobles.
- Regis taking all the initiative shows how it's his roadtrip coming of age journey which is pretty clever. Also Seira's just like that but still.
- Shinwoo stop exercising in class bro. Do not flex on the rest of us this is so rude 😭😭😭
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- Regis confidently saying he's a noble in class to humans he doesn't plan on mind controlling... Baby boy why are you so dumb? How is this hiding your identity??? And Seira just lets him,,, good for her.
Chapter 100 - Ah yes their elegance boner at seeing Raizel... nobles are so fucking weird.
- M-21 thinking he won't get any information because of his time at the Union and thus being surprised at how open Frankenstein is is actually really sweet. Like yeah I still think Frankenstein is an unethical and questionable person but he is kind to most humans (werewolves and nobles can go fuck themselves I guess lmao).
Chapter 101 - The second hand embarrassment I felt when M-21 called the two noblesse... how do I even consume content?
- Yeah 100% most union members don't know the difference between nobles and vampires. I bet they'd classify jiangshi as either mutants or werewolves. Or to be more specific, that would be the classification given to low leveled members. On one hand I think it's dumb that the Union gives members twisted information because how would they even use it? But on the other hand it makes sense since it prevents said members from seeking nobles for help. After all, if they believe even the 'noblesse' are vampires that drink blood, than obviously they won't see them as possible escape routes.
- 'Noblesse only applies to one person'. Yeah because Rai's brother is fucking dead. And so is whoever was his predecessor/parent.
Chapter 102 - Those bullies got backup so fucking fast like Shinwoo literally just asked Regis and Seira if they were okay then boom! They're back.
Chapter 103- Regis going ??? essentially when Shinwoo tells him to take care of Seira is so funny like yes ofc he's confused she's literally a clan leader + noble females aren't physically weaker + noble women work out just like the men.
- Rude, Regis. You can't just ask someone why they're mingling among humans. You're doing that too. Who doesn't mingle among humans smh. Even cats and pigeons mingle with us.
Chapter 105 - Love how everyone else in the household is so sick of ramyeon like Raizel stop please you're being selfish.
Chapter 106 - Frankenstein is the definition of the 'right in front of my salad?' meme at Regis and M-21 arguing at the dinner table. Then there's Seira and Raizel just waiting for the noodles to get soggy so he can't even eat. Wish Urokai could see him getting tortured like this.
- The soldier rejecting backup because he knows the enemy is the Union hurts my heart. Wanting to prevent casualties... iwi
Chapter 107 - Shark how tf do you not know about South Korea? That's one of the asian countries people actually know about. I guess maybe it's because this is from around a decade back? K-pop is more recent and made the country more visible I guess.
- Ah yes Takeo. Forever known as "the first time I read Noblesse and he appeared I thought he was Marie's sister since they had the same hairstyle". Like I thought that before even learning about the Aris Taivra fiasco. My power 😔
- Oh don't worry M-21, Frankenstein stopped experimenting on people 830 years ago. You know, as one does.
Chapter 108 - Shark has like no general knowledge. Geography? History? Tf is that I guess.
- Tao saying they're the worst possible people for the job is so funny like yeah he's right. "All we do is massacre people in warzones why are we in Seoul?"
- The rest of the squad complain or are confused about the peace meanwhile Takeo is vibing. He's the normal guy TM of the group.
- Ah yes noble lore. If you take canon at face value than the fact that nobles were around when humans first emerged and there being about 2-3 clan leaders before the current generation means you can estimate their lifespan. Ofc it differs wildly depending on how you interpret the 'first humans' part. I'll assume there were 3 generations before the current generation (mvp lord being the third generation) and won't be adding the current generation since a 0.5-2k years is kinda meaningless. I'll also be assuming that mvp lord entered eternal sleep at around the same age as his predecessors and that he would have died soon from old age anyway (since canonically they do have limited lifespans). If we assume it's just the first human ancestors (7 million years ago) than the average pureblood lifespan is 2.33 million years. If we assume it's when homo sapiens started to emerge (300k years ago) than it's 100k years. If it's about modern humans (130k years ago) than it's 43.3k years. Regardless I'll ignore it since my hcs are that nobles are effectively immortal unless killed and that the 2-3 clan leaders is a misconception due to a mix of Gechutel just straight up lying, because there are clans that have had fewer clan leaders, because I have nobles settling on Lukedonia only 30k years ago, and because Gechutel is factoring in his own age of 10.2k so it's more like 'There have been 2-3 Ru clan leaders before the Ru clan leader 10k years ago since after we settled in Lukedonia'. There's also the possibility that nobles didn't have lords or clan leaders until a few thousand years ago in canon but the species has existed for much longer.
- 'Nobles are individualistic... They don't despise humans but don't love them either.' Humans w/ ants. Now if the ants were capable of speaking with us it'd be exactly the same situation.
Chapter 109 - "What were they researching here?" Since when does the Union research anything aside from human modifications Kranz? Why do you even need to ask? More seriously this means that the Union doesn't actually only do human experimentation and weapons lmao. The other shit just isn't relevant I guess. It's a shame, I'd have loved to see how a lab focused on like, fixing up polluted waters, would be fit into the story.
- The fact that Tao beat Jake up is never mentioned enough. Also confirms that Jake was lying out of his ass about being the strongest.
- Marie being the weakest assassination squad member is interesting like I know why Crombel doesn't need bodyguards as the reader but you'd think the Union would be suspicious of him not having a stronger bodyguard. Also I still can't believe the Union doesn't bother learning who the members are aside from the ones Crombel tells them about like. Bro???
- Shark calling Takeo uptight is hilarious because the guy literally just shot the falling ceiling light which is the opposite of uptight. Either he was preventing them from getting hurt/being caught or he wanted that to happen considering the fact that he shot it and it shattered. And then he just goes back to leaning against the wall. Takeo please 🤣
Chapter 110 - And Shinwoo's still staying over at Ikhans place. Wonder when he's gonna move back. I really love their dynamic like yeah I beg my sister to get me food all the time too. Also love the apron and skeleton hoodie.
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- Shinwoo went through the five stages of grief pretty quick huh? Like yeah it's his own misunderstanding that Ikhan is dating someone but still. Homophobia is annoying as always though.
Chapter 111 - Suyi paying for their food is so sweet of her and also I relate so much like yeah mood that's me and no I don't want to be paid back.
- Takeo,,, the fact that he just hands his wallet over because he doesn't like violence and doesn't want to beat them up,,, my heart. Otoh... how did he even get cornered in an dark shady alleyway lmao.
- Aris managing to make herself look like a teenager as Taivra is interesting since Takeo says he wants her to be able to go to school like Yuna and Shinwoo when he's treating them. I guess she looks younger without makeup.
- Takeo just straight up pointing his gun at Shark in public because he mentioned Taivra... anger issues much? I understand why but taking your gun out is an overreaction.
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