#dont judge my drink choices

[electoons]

my new years resolution is to embrace the power of "AND?"...stop explaining yourself for doing and liking harmless things that don't hurt anyone. also stop explaining yourself for harmful things that hurt everyone

#especially to cops and judges. its none of their business #mia.txt #im serious about the first half though fr im starting to internalize it. when i start to get anxious about #oh noo im gonna look cringe to the tumblr girlies. oh no i have conflicting opinions about things. oh no im dressed like i #like i think im still 20. like ok and. ? #like stop trying to justify things and just say yeah! and!!! #i have a flabby hairy belly and im wearing a crop top! i dont drink alcohol! i have acne! who cares #its not a statement. its just me living #im wearing a full face of makeup and shaving my legs for whatever reason. im not gonna stand here and explain that oh umm actually #its feminist for me to make choices for myself even if they happen to align with patriarchal standards blah blah who cares!! #no its not feminist for me to do those things and im not gonna try to convince myself it is. in just doing it cause why the hell not

[woofwoofwolf]

REPUTATION

Hobie Brown x fem! Reader

Hobie masterlist: [link]

Summary: Hobie Brown has earned a reputation as one of the toughest punks around. As his new girlfriend you dont dare mess with it.

Notes: alt reader but make it pink and pastels, fem! Reader (she/her pronouns), hurt/comfort, reader has an anxiety/ panick attack, Hobie is a little clueless, new relationship, I'm neurodivergent and this is from my experiences in these settings, so can be read as an autistic reader, flip side to that, I've never actually experienced night life so it might be inaccurate,

Might still edit this lol

You tried to make yourself small in the corner of the dark and musty room. It felt as if that somehow made you stand out more. Which… It probably did… You were the only pastel soft looking thing in a sea of edgy spikes and leather, despite your attempt to tone yourself down. You were honored that Hobie had invited you to watch him play following your newly formed relationship. Last weekend, Hobie had dissipated all your insecurities with his soft kisses and raw words, but they were back full force this night.

It was obvious how respected Hobie was in his community from watching the crowd. It was overwhelming, but made sense all the same. Hobie had this amazing talent of accepting people wholeheartedly and, more importantly, knowing WHO to accept. He wouldn’t even want to give you a second of his time if you were any kind of fascist or creep. He made a great judge of character. He did his own thing, denying the leadership or icon role that would be forced upon him, but giving people hope nonetheless.

His music was…. A choice, but it set the people in the venue ablaze. You mostly loved watching him on his guitar, sweat dripping down from his arms and forehead, filling your cheeks and stomach with warmth. His voice grounded you in familiarity, a bright spot engulfed with the crowd of some scary looking people. You were sure they weren’t trying to intimidate you, Hobie had proved to you to not go by that stereotype, but their outfits were often as loud as their personalities. You weren’t much for the binge drinking that was going on and you had tiptoed away from a table of people that looked to be under the influence of something stronger. Other than that not a lot of people had bothered you. 

You had come with Valerie, a female acquaintance of Hobie whom he had trusted to look after you. You could see her in the crowd keeping an eye on you, despite having urged her to pay you no mind and to go have fun. She came back to where you were any time some guy did approach you.

“Are you okay, sweetheart?” They’d ask, before being shooed away by Valerie… 

Oh god. 

You were being a total killjoy to these people, weren’t you? It was too embarrassing. If people found out you were here for Hobie, they’d laugh you out of the building.

At that point, Hobie’s set ended. He was brilliant, pure adrenaline radiating off of him. He jumped off the banged up stage, being celebrated and hit on the back by the crowd as he made his way through. His eyes were searching for something, for you. When your eyes met, his lit up, while your gaze plummeted down, feet cemented to the ground.

You felt his large hand on your bicep and you flinched. “Ey, what’s wrong?” He said. 

Shit. You didn’t mean to make him upset.

“You not feeling good?”

You shook your head. “You didn’t drink anything suspicious, did you?”

“She didn’t drink anything all night,” came the voice of Valerie. All of a sudden you were aware of all the worried eyes directed your way. You stood out way too much.

“Oh,” He sounded disappointed, it made your stomach turn. “Did you not have fun, darling?”

That was when the full on panic set in. You didn’t want his friends to know you were dating- what would happen to Hobie if they did?

“No, it was okay.” You said in a quick, high pitched voice, big tears beginning to fall down your face without warning. “Please let me go.” You tried to break free from his touch and run away, but he caught you quickly and walked you out of the event room, through the hallways towards one of the exits. You didn’t dare struggle, but couldn’t help squirming under his gentle grip as people stared and whispered. Valerie followed you two. It was a pleasant and unusually quiet night as you stepped out onto the curb

Once you stopped walking the tears flowed freely from your face and you did nothing but hiccup out apologies. Hobie’s warm eyes watched you full with worry. “Sorry, ‘m sorry. I’ll let you go if you want, I just can’t let you leave like this, okay?” He gently rubbed your right arm, leaving you space, but you subconsciously melted into him regardless, which seemed to reassure him just as much as it reassured you.

“Hobie you idiot,” Valerie said. She was leaning against the poster covered event door to make sure nobody would follow you through that exit. “Are you okay, (y/n)?” You nodded with a sob, another apology leaving your mouth.

“What the hell happened?” Hobie asked. “Did some bloke put his hands on you?”

“No,” you croaked. “No, Val kept an eye on me.”

“You shouldn’t have brought her here in the first place, you dumb git,” Val interjected. “This obviously wasn’t her scene.”

“No- that’s not it either, I, ehm,” your eyes darted from the ground to Valerie, feeling self conscious. She dramatically sighed.

“Fine. I get it, I’ll be inside if you need me.” She put her hand on the handle before pointing at you. “But I want to see you before you leave, okay? You were my responsibility tonight and I’m not letting you leave like such a mess.” You nodded, your whole face feeling hot. “And I’m still mad at you,” she said to Hobie before diving back into the building.

When the door shut, you separated from Hobie as he petted your head, moving his thumb down to your cheek, stroking it in an attempt to dry your tears. You closed your eyes and frowned.

“God, I’m so sorry, Hobie..”

Hobie shook his head. “Shit, I’m the one who should be sorry. I was too daft to notice this wasn’t your thing.”

“No!” You took his hand and squeezed it, looking into his deep brown eyes to convey your sincerity. “That’s not it. I loved watching you, you were .. SO breathtaking. I’m so thankful you wanted me here in the first place, seriously… I’m the one who’s problem, really,”

“What are you on about?”

“I- I can’t put your name to shame like this. I’m not- punk, I’m not cool- I totally humiliated you just now, I mean with your reputation-”

He let go of your hands and shook his hands in a dismissive motion. “Woah, woah, stop right there.” He let out a nervous airy laugh. You picked at your nails as he searched for words. “...I could NOT be arsed about something like that, alright?”

“But, people respect you and-”

“Nah-ah, no buts,” He caged you between himself and the wall “If my mates respect me less for who I love, then they’re not worth shit to me- get that through your thick skull,”

You could only sniff in response, still feeling bad about the whole ordeal. You were surprised when Hobie pressed a kiss to the crown of your head and held it there.

“’m sorry I didn’t check with you more if you were cool with being here,” He whispered into your hair. “I was just so excited to have you be watching me… I’ll do better next,”

You laughed. “I’ll do better too. Promise… and It was exciting for me too,” you could feel him grin against your head.

“Well, that sure is convenient for the both of us, innit?” He let you go and you felt your anxiety lifting. “Next time, if you still want to go to a show, let's go to one together, yeah? I won’t leave you on your own.”

You nodded. “And next time I’ll disguise myself and tell people that was your crazy ex.”

Hobie snorted. “Just tell em you were pissed and no one will care. C’mon, let's get Vals permission to leave and then I’ll keep you company tonight, yeah?”

————

Wait how did this turn into an hurt comfort fic? This was supposed to be a fluffy little drabble lol… I’m semi proud of this one ngl,, writing Hobie’s dialogue is HARD AS BALLS though. I tend to write very formal sounding dialogue, so a character like Hobie is difficult for me, even if he weren’t British. Plus I only know like,, old people British slang lmao. Like sure, I can google and stuff, but for example when you google slang for “happy” the word “chuffed” will come up. Like, Brits correct me if I’m wrong, but this mfer would NOT say “chuffed”?? like that sounds so old to me? (Istg if he says it in ATSV or BTSV I’m going to be so mad lol)

On that note- long shot- if someone who’s British would like to go over my dialogue sections and leave some suggestions, I would greatly appreciate it. Message me if you’re interested. Don’t feel pressured though, I love you guys all the same. 

I did read this through multiple times, but not as thorough as I sometimes do. Let me know if there are any mistakes.

#hobie brown #spider punk #spiderverse #hobie brown x reader #hobie brown x you #spiderpunk x reader #atsv #hobie brown x y/n #scenario #hobie brown x fem reader #hobie brown x autistic reader

[slashingdisneypasta]

Disney Villains 7 Minutes in Heaven.

Comment your results! Are you happy? 😅

Some soft, thin material- A cravat: You got Captain Hook!

"Oh- thank you, I believe that's mine. *tucks it back into his shirt* Ahhh, there! Now, my dear- *holds out hand* will you do an old sea captain the absolute pleasure?"

Something small, cylindrical, and glassy-feeling- A full potion vial: You got the Evil Queen!

"Don't drink that. Not yet. Wait until you're inside, then... well, the choice is entirely yours."

Something small, cylindrical, and metallic-feeling- A bullet: You got Clayton!

"Hmmm... I think I might've caught something far better than a wild animal in this trap, hm? What say you?"

Something circular with a clump on top- A ring: You got Judge Claude Frollo!

"This a loathsome, sinful game, eurgh... *sees its you who got his ring* but, I suppose, acceptations can be made... "

Some sort of unpleasant, rough feeling clump- A piece of volcanic rock: You got Hades!

"*As soon as you pick out the molten rock* Booya! Yes! Ha. C'mon, babe, I promise I don't bite-- wellll, not unless you're into that (; "

Something hard, cracked open, and... slimy- A shellfish exposing some squishy, red... tissue?: You got Ursula! (and her lipstick)

"*Chuckling* Oh, well that's just perfect~... Darling, follow me, we'll have so much fun together; I promise~... "

Something soft, malleable, and- nudging into your hand?- Morph: You got Long John Silver!

"Well aren't I the luckiest ol' cyborg in all the cosmos? (;"

Some soft, folded up paper- Passage papers: You got Prince Hans!

"*Takes the papers back* Thank you- hey, don't I know you?? Oh yeah, I saw you come in! Y/N, right?? Nice to meet you, I'm Prince Hans. Come on, I promise I'm not like the others- we can just talk. Unless you wanted... oh no, sorry never mind don't worry about it 😏."

#Disney Villains x Reader #7 Minutes In Heaven #just cuz #7MIH #Disney Villains

[bigwishes]

Since I heard you’ve got a few of those vials back in stock - perhaps I could get some for this new group of lads I’ve taken on for the year. Hopefully it’ll give my team the edge!

Sure thing coach! anything for a friend. Although surely you know that players "enhancing" themselves never goes the way they want it to, but no matter all your players have already picked out a vial from the shop.

Thought they'd all get the same vial? nah not enough of this stuff to go around but why dont we check in with some of your players to see how they are going.

--

First there is Kyle, a block you were hoping to be your star player of the season, 7ft tall with the same amount of muscle as some of the blokes training for Mr Olympia! all at the age of 24, the dude sure was going places on the field, playing ruby he could basically just carry the ball from one side of the field to the other, anyone who'd try to tackle him would basically just bounce right off. I see he took a vial called "Prince Power". A pretty unusal choice for a guy that massive to pick up a vial like this but hey who am I to judge.

I see Kyle has shrunk down from 7ft to 5 and all that muscle seems to have evaporated. I guess he didn't read the back of the bottle or maybe he wanted a change of scene because "Prince Power" turns whoever drinks it into a power bottom who drools at the smell of another mans musk and needs a big strong knight in shining armour to come rescue him from practically anything...yeah he might be useless on the field now, unless you want to take one of the enemy players off the field by having Kyle here..."distract" him behind the goals half way through the game.

--

We of course also have Tyler, a bloke who only really started trying to get big when you signed him for his skills. 22 and 5.5ft the guy wasn't much wider than a twig which is why I think "Wall 'o' Mass" caught his eye, very popular in the muscle fetish community but providing Tyler is good at math he should be able to work out the correct dosage lets check on him now.

Wow he has really beefed all the way up in a matter of hours, good for him, 1/4 of a bottle was a good starting point now he can-.....what's that? Tyler took more? well I'm sure he didn't- oh, he wanted to be bigger than Kyle and be the new star player? SO HE DRANK THE WHOLE BOTTLE? man someone get this man a couch to get comfortable because I give it 40 minutes before he is swollen into a massive meathead who is unable to move, well the vial wasn't called "Wall 'o' Mass" for nothing, drinking the whole thing means you'll turn into a bodybuilder so big all you can do is flex, a literal wall of mass.

Boy will he be kicking himself when he finds out what happened to Kyle, bro threw away his mobility for nothing.

-------

What about Jake? well Jake did the smart thing, he wanted enough mass to be able to move freely but also drop anyone who tried to tackle him, so I sent him over to our Bear section, although I can't tell you which one he took I was busy taking stock in the back.

The man is definitely going through some changes, nice muscle growth definition, I see he has become insanely hairy. What else will happen? well let's check which one he took now that I'm free, hmmm, oh man, none of your players are fucking smart are they bro, Jake could have taken anything off the shelf to get the results he wanted but he had to take "Wild Bear". No that doesn't mean he's a bear with a wild partying side. Let's put it this way man, I'd hide any cans of salmon you got lying around and maybe send animal control around to his house in the morning, looks like the zoo will be getting a new exhibit and you'll be looking for a new player.

#male transformation #muscle transformation #muscle #male tf #reality change #tf story #gay transformation

[whosectype]

How did you come up with chai in the first place?

Well chai is sort of a sona, so some aspects are inspired by me aksjskjdfjf but I chose her name to be chai, because chai is very much a comfort drink that is my favorite thing to make in the morning!

also I partially created her originally to ship with mugman cough cough

design wise, she is green coded just cause I love the color green! Her main outfit (at least when I first created her) was how I wanted to dress at the time cause I was unhappy abt how I look and stuff ( BUT now I dress how I want and chais main outfit is something I wear pretty much on a weekly basis hehe). The cracks on her hands are a stylistic choice to push lore and stuff, but the chip on her rim is based off of the scar that I have down my head!

I went through and pulled out some old chai art from the depths of my procreate folders from like august last year SO DONT JUDGE ITS OLD AND UGLY

These are like the some of the veerrry first ^^^

Random old doodles and chais old bad ending design lmao

THE FIRST MUGCHAI DRAWING (it’s so bad Ik) and then a doodle of chai and Cuphead dancing on a rooftop to Elvis Presley (not a ship drawing btw just sillies being sillies)

And last this old ass comic from FOREVER AGO

#Ask #my art #Old art #cddwtd #cddwtd chai #cddwtd mugman #cddwtd cuphead #mugchai #i have 4 separate folders in procreate for Cddwtd stuff #One is for the comics #One is for fanart of mutuals and stuff #One is for extra pieces and doodles #And one is labled REDACTED and blacked out so you can’t see what’s in it #That is for old Cddwtd art #That’s where these came from ALSKSJJD #These are from 2022 end of summer beginning of fall I think #Ew

[strawbs-screaming]

punch out fake tumblr posts bc bye

i was bored. this sucks ass but we ball

♉ charging-bull follow

so done with the wvba. i am literally angry every day i fight here. fuck you all. Cant tell if im going into a locker room or a psych ward

🍀 irishlad420 follow

isnt this your 10th post about how you hate the wvba

♉ charging-bull follow

shut up and go throw bricks at ppl again or something. leprechaun ass

👑 The-King100 follow

Burger burger wing

🥊Macaroni-Mac follow

so true king

👑 The-King100 follow

thank you,

📀 dancing-king follow

bull calling aran a leprechaun is WILD 😭😭😭

🦋 one-and-only-heike follow

LITERALLY 😭😭😭😭 LOST MY SHIT LAUGHING AT THAT POST AGHAHHHHHHHHHGGGG HELPP

🕶️ RichAndHot21 follow

love watching them fight lmao

🥖 Baguettedude29 follow

i used to not understand my aunt chugging wine everyday, now i understand what shes about.

🥂 FizzyDrinker follow

i am concerned about you.

🥖 Baguettedude29 follow

As if you dont drink soda like its water. look at yourself before judging.

🥂 FizzyDrinker follow

my soda helps me fight. your wine helps you ignore your problems.

🌹Matador26 follow

"stop using so much perfume!" god forbid a man wants to smell like roses 🙄🙄

🥾 fightingmachine90 follow

some of us have asthma,god forbid people want to breathe without struggle.

🌹Matador26 follow

not my fault your lungs suck! ❤️

🎖️sandy-in-the-flesh follow

Ok so theres this new boxer and hes SO FUCKING TINY 😭😭😭 please dont tell me i have to fight a teenager hes still in school. Apparently i have a match with him. Pray for his ass hes going to regret his choices

🎖️sandy-in-the-flesh follow

bad news

🌙 Hondo1000 follow

love watching the sunrise. feels so refreshing and energizing.

🥊Macaroni-Mac follow

this is the kind of post a rooster would make before waking up everyone

🌙 Hondo1000 follow

I wish i was a rooster so i could ignore what you just said.

#punch out #headcanon #punch out wii #punch out headcanons #aran ryan #bald bull #don flamenco #glass joe #piston hondo #heike kagero #super macho man #little mac

[cedar-cub]

@cedar.cub

smalls without regression gear 🐾 🧺

tw: food+drink

alot of smalls cannot get gear for their regression,

🩹 maybe because they cant order things because they still live at home with bio parents, or maybe youre too shy to go buy something for being small at your local grocery store.

whatever your case dont worry! heres some things that discrete tinys can use as gear! ☁️

1. Gatorade with the squeeze top as a sippy!

🍼 its a good alternative to buying actually sippys if you’re worried about what other people might say or if someone looks through your packages. no one will look or think twice if you’re just buying gatorade.

plus : you can rinse it out afterwards and fill it with your drink of choice if you choose! 🐑

2. Johnson’s bath and lotions

🧴 now i know what youre thinking, but trust me no one will question you if youre buying Johnson’s bubble bath, baby lotion, or baby oil. johnson’s bubble bath is super fun and comes in different colored bottles that make my brain go brrr smol brain. i also like to put on the baby oil after i shave my legs cause the smell makes me feel tiny 🧺

3. fuzzy socks

fuzzy socks! omg they save lives. finding a cute pair of fuzzy socks has to be one of the best feelings. they can be holiday themed, season themed, and so many more. and whos gonna second guess socks? they can come in cute colors that make you feel teeny or even in a print that you find cute. plus they’re comfy! 🧦

careful not to slip if you have hardwood floors though kiddo!

4. soft blankets

now i dont know if you have a home-goods near you, but let me tell you, the amount of super cute soft blankets that make me feel small there is crazy! they come in all sorts of patterns, puppy paws, holiday/seasonal prints, dear print, you name it! and so soft and cozy. of course if you dont have a home-goods im sure theres a store near you with some cuddly blankies. ☁️

5. bubbles!

pop pop pop! 🫧

what can be better than blowing or popping bubbles?! /rt bubbles can be for big kids and kiddos! no ones gonna judge you for buying a tube of bubbles. who doesnt like bubbles??

6. snacks!

heres a list of snacks that make me feel small:

gummies, fruit snacks, juice boxes, cheddar bunnies, dinosaur egg oatmeal, anything off the kids menu, apples, grapes, strawberries, blueberries, dinosaur nuggies etc!

🧸 theres many more things that can be used for discrete regression, but hopefully this sparked your imagination or inspiration little bit! remember kiddos, you are valid, you are loved, and you are special 🧃

~cedar <3

#agere #age regressive #age regression #age regressor #agere caregiver #agere community #agere lifestyle #agere positivity #agerespace #noncom agere #sfw petre #pet regression #petre

[kayleeheartkins]

Is there any reason you dont drink? I dont drink often cuz hangovers are usually the cause of my migraines

Nothing good comes from it besides a few hours of fun. I get the worst hangovers, and that’s not worth it for me personally. It’s expensive and the health repercussions later in life are even more expensive. Your cancer/disease risk goes up the more you drink, I’m not a good candidate 😂 I already don’t have a good deck of cards in the health category 😮‍💨

☑️ Mark my words alcohol will be the new cigarettes in 10 years! Remember what they said about cigs in the 60/70’s it’s HEALTHY and you lose weight 😉 but I don’t judge anyone whom enjoys drinking either it’s just my own personal choice. I’ve had my hay/days at a very young age! 🥳😅.. now I sound old 🤣👵🏻

My parents were big social drinkers and I grew up around alcohol, I’ve been in abusive relationships that involved alcohol. It’s not my friend 💔 it changes how people act and I don’t care for that 🥺

[chialattea]

Lol, my Hawke is also the bottom in her relationship with Bela (it just makes sense to me) and they do commit crimes together but she tends to be more blue/diplomatic. Is yours sarcastic? And what exactly is their dynamic like?

OH MY GOD I JUST SAW THISN HFGVFYU

I forgot tumblr asks were a thing,, thank god i started fucking around and clicked the correct button.

Bottom Hawke enjoyers unite!!!! I just think it's especially funny considering theyre quote unquote the leader of the group, so thinking of them as actually losers who are just winging it makes me so happy.

My Hawke is mostly a purple/sarcastic hawke. She's mostly quite laid back and easygoing because she's allergic to taking things seriously and/or confronting her issues, which bites her in the ass as the story progresses. She'd rather die than let people know she has feelings other than funny one-liners. She's loud and rash, but somehow things keep working out for her... Until they dont. They really come crashing down. Behind her chronic class clown facade is someone with a very set personal moral code. She genuinely cares for her friends and has a surprisingly high EQ, which is why the kirkwall gang hasnt devolved into beating each other senseless. At first glance she seems flaky and unreliable, but she's relentless when it comes to that she thinks as her responsibilities: her family, her friends, and for some fucking reason the city of Kirkwall (she really, really wishes she hadnt gotten attached god fucking damnit, its a dumpster but its HER dumpster). Those are the only three subjects you'll see her getting serious about. Other than that she values freedom quite highly and doesn't really care about the big picture or politics. She's more of a small-scale, act local kind of gal.

At first Isabela and her get along like a house on fire; they love partying, they love drinking, Isabela finds Hawke's smartass attitude hilarious and Hawke finds really attractive how Isabela can steal shit without being found out. The problems start when Hawke's sense of responsibility and morals start to show up. It's not like Hawke has any issue with Isabela doing whatever she wants, she's a "live and let live" kind of person, but,,, even if Hawke presents herself as an unrepentant clown, she's anything but. She wants to help to a self-sacrificing degree, refuses to engage with her own needs and has little sense of self-preservation. She's careless yet also keeps prioritizing everyone else before herself, which infuriates Isabela. They begin a situationship which is supposed to be purely physical, but Hawke gets attached yet refuses to admit it, even to herself; Isabela finds Hawke's newfound moral righteousness grating and makes her feel judged for her choices. Basically miscommunications galore. They have a big fight where neither of them actually listen to each other and refuse to be emotionally vulnerable.

And yet both of them come back for the other in their time of need, regardless and even in spite of their positions because no matter what they actively choose to love each other,, does that make sense? After the second act both of them decide their relationship is worth the trouble of,, working through their issues together and trying to better themselves. As everything around Hawke and Kirkwall start crashing down their relationship becomes their solace. It's hard, and they fuck up a lot, but they choose to make it work and actively care for their relationship.

Yeah but anyways, my Hawke is also a bumbling idiot with enough charisma to compensate it. She has fucked before but blushes like a maiden the second she sees Isabela's ankle. She's the "me and the bad bitch i pulled with my whimsical rizz" meme. Isabela is like hawke no and shes like hawke YESSSSS she's a golden retriever. if i had to choose a character she's most similar to it'd be gideon i guess.

TLDR; hawke: "isabela i taped myself to the ceiling but now i cant get down can you handfeed me some hot pockets" isabela: "why do i find this attractive"

#da2 #dragon age #chia rambles #hawkebela #god i wrote this without thinking ill definitely make a better post #but i wanted to answer because i felt so bad i hadnt seen this ask before #anyways its all about emotional vulnerability and choosing to love each other around here #and being chaotic together #be gay do crimes #aveline is constantly on the verge of a stroke #hawke is the kind of gal who says yippee unironically #shes cringe but she is free #everyone is like god damnit shes so fucking pathetic why do we like her #shes eating food off the floor #yet somehow when push comes to shove she DELIVERS #so they grow attached to their horror

[golden28s]

tag game tuesday 💖

thanks to the lovely @lupeloto for the tag <3

name: iris

age: 23

favorite color: purple

beverage of choice: coke or fanta, no the lemon one everything that tastes like lemon is disgusting yes is it

do you push notifications turned on for tumblr? nope

opinion on fireworks: they give me anxiety because im a five year old but also i kinda have a trauma chsbxbsbz

favorite childhood toy? my bratzs <3

the store you shop at the most: idk if it counts as a store and dont judge me but mcdonald's

do you swear a lot? yes, a lot tho it used to be way worse when i was a teenager

favorite trope: OH MY GOD FAKE DATING, but also enemies to lovers, or rivals to lovers. I have a soft spot for the i hate everyone but you trope too

an album with no skips: faith in the future by louis tomlinson or harry styles' debut album

if you could play any instrument, what would you choose? uh guitar i think tho i already tried and failed but

your biggest pet peeve: i have so many xjbdnd but for example people making too much noise while they eat or books that aren't organized by size

favorite time of the day: morning

and finally, did you drink water today? yes i actually drink too much water

im gonna tag @ashleyyroses @scaponigifs and @magicalbisexualenergy but feel free to do it you want too !!!

#tag game tuesday

[mchiti]

i just dont understand people's obsession with other people's religion. faith is supposed to be something personal, between a person and god. why are people trying to analyse other people's behavior and put them in "good muslim" "bad muslim" boxes? i remember the same thing happening back when 1d were popular and every muslim fan i knew was obsessed with zayn's deen. freaking out when they see him smoke or drink or not fast ramadan when they were on tour. how many muslims do we know in our personal lives that are doing those exact same things ? its unfair that people want popular muslims to be the perfect picture of islam. if they want that maybe dont get attached to singers and footballers and look up imams or something. im sorry im ranting in ur inbox but as a muslim who grew up in morocco i just feel its really uncalled for to judge someone's deen especially when they grew up in the diaspora or don't understand arabic and in hakim's case went through tough times that might shake anyones faith. and even if that wasnt the case his faith is his and his alone and we should all respect that

Anon don't apologise for ranting, all good.

I'm not a hijabi. I know pretty well what it means to be questioned, this choice alone makes everything harder and I only have to thank that I have my father who respects and understands my choice and supports me through it. I used to be and I will always support and love hijabi women, but I personally decided this for myself.

I remember that about Zayn Malik, yes, and I felt sorry for him. The discrepancy is quite ironic, because you read all of the judgement but then you go out in the streets, in the real world out there, and it's full of Muslim kids who drink, who smoke, and who struggle greatly, trying to cope being diaspora kids in the west. Let alone most of them live the struggle of being social outcast and very often come from low-income families. t's not just diaspora kids anyway, I know how many struggle in Morocco. We wouldn't be here being diaspora kids in the first place. So what start out as a war against "sinners" becomes a war against the poor and I can't help to think there's a fine line between religion and classism and some people really cross that line. What can people hold against Hakim anyway, he fasts and got a lot of shit because of it in his career (remember when him and Noussair were fasting during UCL and some people at Ajax were mad?). It's only because of his background (some of it quite exaggerated by the media for racist purposes anyway) and yeah, most times that's just poverty stigma and not much more.

We don't have a lot of representation so Muslim people who are famous end up under the microscope for everything but you're right, they're not Imams, they are people with they complexity and layers which we all have. I genuinely don't know what else to say, and my religion didn't teach me to judge people, especially not the most vulnerable.

[nazorneku]

finally i decided to amass my observations regarding distinctions in which MC with various backgrounds can pick up details 'bout Ais and his surroundings— along with screenshots, i will also provide my contemplation and hypothesis, until the full game is up such details are obv free to our interpretation

we are going down the line, so the first one to interrogate will be The Unnamed - Oracle so far this background showed me that they literally sensed a whole lot of what happens around Ais, they sense the "heartbeat" of the spring, they sense that entity that lives there and commands that power, they literally sense that demon later whilst they inspect Ais, they also perceive a minor shift in tattoo and i dont think it's accidental, im p sure it's a brand of sort - and here i have two theories bout it, it either belongs to Ais himself and connected to his monstrous form or it's a mark of a deal struck (im more likely to lean onto the 2d option 'cause octopus being the demon of the spring is more fitting and likely to be, cause Ais' features are sharp and aside from tattoo he literally has no other motives or similarities with this leggy nasty) and later again they connect the dots to the spring, when Ais utters the name of a friend, who lives in his head— and that is beyond doubt at this point the demon he dealt with, i aint even gonna question it anymore

the second one is The Hound the worth pointing out moment is when we mention the gang and MC connects the dots - Ais behaves and carries self as someone who used to be in a position of power and amongst many ppl, which also makes me wonder - what happened and it also brings me back to the question he asked MC later - THAT felt rly personal, not smth you will wonder out of the blue— so what rly happened 'cause it felt important to him, relevant of sort, mayhap the gang was affected by his deal or the Seaspring

and finally The Alchemist - Mage the most prominent change is when Ais utters the name of the friend that lives in his head— MC muses that the name sounds familiar, but they cant put their finger on where and how they could hear/know it we can safely assume Ocudeus is the name of the demon with whom Ais made a deal and it somehow bound them (??) 'cause official info stated "borrow powers" and THAT means connection, so he doesnt belong entirely to himself whilst he has those powers... which also raises 333 questions, especially the one "what he got on his end of the bargain" or more like "what he actually surrendered for powers" and MC could read that name either is books or hear it from mentor

i literally spent the entire day trying to get the blasted screenshot and im p much sure i fucked up with choices somewhere on the way, 'cause i cant lend this option with the Alchemist for some reason and im not THAT old, i totally remember that they stated such thing, 'cause i played demo a few times with this background till i decided to try others :| i have 30h on demo for a reason, 'cause im v particular to details, but my inability to get that screenshot now annoys me :| so i will add this one later

here i will list other random thoughts, that dont let my brain rest, in no particular order:

the lady that led MC to the Seaspring— she seemed perfectly fine and in own mind and most of all she knew their name, which leads me to believe that it was intentional targetting, this person intentionally led MC to the Seaspring with aim for them to join the happy family, which also leads me to believe that the demon at the depths of the spring may intentionally collect ppl

and this prompts another suspicion, especially judging by how Ais with his question to MC just pushed the idea of drinking from the spring further away— you simply DONT ask such groundbreaking questions, if you support or promote the power of the spring, THAT is as i mentioned above Ais knows that spring intentionally collects ppl and he isnt fond of the idea subjecting sentient ppl, resulting in them loosing their sense of identity... whereas Soulless, on the other hand, obtain the modicum of intelligence and not driven by only murderous instinct, which he actually supports, judging by how he treats them fondly as pets

#Ⓐ : relevant ( ais ) #Ⓐ : introspection ( ais ) #[ it's a bit all over the place at the moment :weary: ] #[ i may add some more ideas later or if i will notice other things i could overlook ]

[allsadnshit]

i feel like i keep trying to force myself to be okay right now like even when my day is terrible im like raw milk matchaaaa :-) but like no (i mean i am going to drink that but) i cant eat like im happy when im not! i dont want to signal bad things to my body cause its a vicious cycle and i want to show my body abundance and happiness but thats not how i am feeling thats not how im doing? and now im judging myself for suffering like “should you REALLY be so sad when you know it affects your health badly? cheer up even though everything is terrible or else even on a new day it will have a bad start from your choices today” but like its too much pressure i am doing bad, i feel disconnected from everyone in my life, that’s the reality! i can’t fake it till i make it. its really happening

[kafkagf]

stream of consciousness

im screaming found my former coworker who i went on a date + hooked up w at the end of the semester’s reddit and omg its not looking good girls....like i dont want to be too mean but why do i attract ppl w nothing going for them w no ambition? he seemed really nice and genuine when we were talking and whenever we would hang out but now i have no idea how to judge ppl :( obv i know no one is perfect, im not perfect, i dont wanna be mean maybe im just coping but i just want him to talk to me lmao...

is going through his reddit an invasion of privacy? i guess id be annoyed if someone found my tumblr but i have no real identifying information here besides my name and age and he posts in all the subreddits of his interests. like it doesn't take a detective to figure out who you are!!! i kinda feel bad about learning so much about him this way, like its kinda through him but he isn't sharing these with me :/ sometimes i just cant control myself when it comes to like temptation and/or uncertainty :((  so according to his post he’s not busy, he’s on his “summer grind” so hes literally just been ignoring me, i texted him last thursday and he still hasn't texted me back, i refuse to text again to save my dignity but my god...honestly its summer so i totally get wanting to relax but if he was actually into me like he said he would want to talk to me right?? 

once we talked about not trying in our non major classes and we both agreed we didn’t care...but not caring in my book is a B+ and apparently he failed his summer abroad course?? in the post he talked about how he doesn't care about his gpa and ive been on the dean's list since my freshman year like im such a loser my gpa means so much to me. in terms of compatibility he also like drinks and does a lot of drugs and im p much sober and straight edge, our date went well and didnt feel awkward but maybe thats because i literally got rides home from him so we developed a report. 

i remember this post on here about tumblr being an aesthetic echo chamber and omg on our date i felt it, like i kept referencing things that i thought were like common knowledge and he had no clue what i was talking about, like philosophical concepts or films or whatever (pretentious girl things 😣) but omg why is dating and relating to college guys so hard :( to be completely fair to him i was like unclear on the date but i did hook up w him and have talked about a future with him very very lightly so i feel like he knows im interested? no idea man 

i might hook up with him again if im bored or be friendly with him but i dont think i should get too close to him, from what i found he seems like he has a lot going on in his life and i feel kinda bad for him, but no matter how much i rag on him im the bigger loser for getting played (possibly?) by him!! we’re both adults ill give him his space whatever. luckily i quit my old job and we aren’t in the same major or anything so i dont HAVE to see him again, its pretty much all my choice. but WHATEVER, L posting is good for the soul sometimes. 

i really miss being in the city. being home literally makes me so lonely and sad, ive been peeling the yellow wallpaper and whatnot, but like i caused all my misery so i have no one to blame but myself for my current state. 

#dl #diaryposting

[manythoughtmanyprayers]

since we last spoke, i have been trying to keep myself as busy as i could, be it at home or hanging out with friends, so that i could distract myself from the voices in my head and from thinking too much about it, about us, about you. because the wound is still very fresh, despite me acting calm, im still sobbing on the inside, because its never good to end a connection you had with someone you like, no matter how shity it couldve been, it still hurts like hell.

but after last night, the first time i actually sat in front of someone who i knew wouldnt judge me for still hurting and feeling down about us, and finally said "despite how much i want to punch him, i still like him and those feelings aint going anywhere, no matter how much i hurt on the inside", i allowed myself to think about it, about us, because i knew that there was at least one person who knew about how i trully feel and understands how i feel, someone who gave me validation to do so.

the first thing i did today was turn on my phone, open tumblr and read everything i wrote about you, which is all but one post, since i only created this account to be free to write about us, about you, about how you make me feel, good or bad. because really, i had no other place to speak freely about it with no judgment and no criticism. there was no way to talk about this with my friends or my mum at a certain point, doing it publicly on social media was totally not a choice, and telling you all of these directly was something i was always very much scared.

while reading everything, from the most recent to the very first post i did, i couldnt help but tear up and feel this nostlagic, warm feeling inside of me. because despite the bad posts, i still stand for everything i said. from me feeling insecure and thanking you for helping me with that, to me wanting to be babied by you, to me being a corny son of a bitch because of my feelings for you. they are still alive inside of me, i still stand by all of it, it hasnt changed at all. and never will, no matter how many fights we have, no matter how long well stay appart, no matter how much people try to change my mind.

last night, when i was telling my godmother about how much im hurting but feel like i need to keep it all to myself because of all the background noise, she said "dont listen to peoples opinions if they are not willing to help you how you actually need". yes, she said she was relieved that our situationship ended because i would no longer hurt like i used to, but she was the only one who actually saw how much i was fighting and saw that there was potential, and that it just wasnt meant to be for now. she is the only one who saw how im feeling and is willing to help me with that, and is not just focused on making me forget about you because of all the bad shit that happened. she saw how much i care about you still, and is willing to put all the shit behind and help me understand how im feeling and work it it, instead of just desregarding my feelings like everyone else.

that little sentence she said made me realise that its ok for me to still care about you, to still like you like i did all this time. that, despite the bad shit that happened and the rage i feel, its ok to have feelings lingering and to care for you, still has much as i did while we were together. i still want to see you, talk to you, know about your days and nights. i still want to hold you, during the day and during the night, to touch you and smell you. i still wonder if youre tired, if youre eating well, if youre drinking enough water, getting enough sleep. i still want to help you in anyway i can, be it for yourself, for college, for work, for anything you need me. if you need chocolate in the middle of the night, ill still get my shoes and jacket on, and go all the way to your house to give you some, even if its raining.

i wonder if you come here often. whenever you would mention my "little texts" i would always feel amazed because i honestly thought you would forget about it as soon as i gave you the link. i never thought you would actually remember this exists, and that you would actually read what i wrote. will you still come here while were appart? or will you refraim yourself from visiting? youre always welcome, no matter how we are.

i hope we can become friends again, at least, so i can wish you a happy birthday, i will be devastated if the day comes and ill have to stop myself from doing it (i know i can always do it, with a simple happy birthday text, but it would not be the same if were appart, it would feel much better if were on speaking terms again, we will see).

[szif]

monster mango flavour (blue-orange) review:

-im judging a drink by its can. it has no textures like the one i drank first, the monster rosa (pink) which i am disappointed about. i do not know if i picked up a faulty one or if this is its intended design, but i am not liking it. i was literally touching this can over in a perverted manner and i got nothing out of it. no cool textures to rub.

-the smell is. im sorry but i genuinely fucking did the most gruesome face sniffing this thing. like wow. but getting used to it, its really just mango. its a bit different than other mango flavoured things, but its fine i think.

-the taste is. it's. it's literally mango flavoured. its quite pleasant, i think. like, this is just a regular drink. theres nothing about it at all for me. i do not find this refreshing or anything, if people asked me to pay lots of money for it (i paid 700 for this can alone, by the way) i would go what the fuck. why. its a mediocre drink. but i experimented with this on my own so i think its fine.

-the story on the can is not that interesting and i dont like the visuals of it that much.

i gotta say uh, a 4/10 like its alright. would drink it if presented with no other choice.

#threedigits monster review