#dont mind me im just talking to myself

[thuringvvethil]

i really like the lore and history of exandria but how recently the calamity happened always weirds me out. honestly the timescale in general does, especially given how long-lived some folks are. like. 800 years post-divergence doesn't feel... quite old enough to be ancient, imo. in real world terms that's the age of like, the magna carta. in a word where elves can live upwards of 700 years, that's not a super huge amount of time. compared to elven lives the age of arcanum wasn't that long either, and the first age before it was ??? idk it weirds me out how New and Young existence seems to be.

this isn't a huge criticism for the setting from me since it crops up a lot in scifi/fantasy - timelines are set up as if things have been around a Long Time, but the years don't quite add up in a way that tracks for me. the 50k year reaper cycle vs how long asari live is another example.

for my own exandria homegame i've kind of handwaved the exandria timeline to be much longer, shoved some extra ages in there and leaned on the feywild's time soup issues and that's mostly worked for me.

#dont mind me im just talking to myself #exandria homegame thoughts

[becauseplot]

Okay so something about the spiderbit wedding has been sitting in the back of my mind for awhile now and I don't know if anyone's talked about it but I just recently figured out the words to articulate it (kind of) so here we go!

Prior to the q!spiderbit wedding, a lot of the fanart/fanfics I saw/read depicted Cellbit waiting at the altar while Roier is walked down the aisle by either Foolish or Vegetta. Which makes sense! It keeps with the idea of the father "giving away" the bride (or in this case, the groom) at the wedding, which wouldn't be possible for Cellbit since he doesn't have any parental figures on the island. So, I was a little surprised when the wedding day came and Cellbit was the one to walk down the aisle while Roier waited at the altar. I was a bit disappointed at first---they missed a chance to do a sweet little spin on a wedding tradition! (Found family* my beloved <3)

But then I kept thinking---something about Cellbit walking down the aisle. Something about Cellbit walking down the aisle. Something about Cellbit walking down the aisle to the altar where Roier, his soon-to-be husband and trusted confidant, stands; where Felps, his best friend whom he just got back from an unknown fate, stands; where Forever, the friend he wronged but never lost faith in and wants to do right by going forward, stands.

Something about Cellbit being alone and walking himself down the aisle towards them like he is making an active choice. After the fear and the isolation, pushing others away and hurting those close to him so he could make himself a martyr because he felt like he had to face the Federation alone and that he could only rely on himself---now choosing to walk towards the altar where they stand---walking towards his happy ending.

Because this is his happy ending. I'm not at all an advocate for the idea of "oh romance/marriage is the only thing that will make you happy in life" but not only is being married to Roier something Cellbit desperately wants, this wedding means so much more than just getting married.

Of course, this isn't really the end, but for someone like Cellbit, it's a start. A new beginning. A brand new chapter of love, friendship, and trust. So yes, Cellbit walks down the aisle at his wedding, and he does it alone, and he does it because he deserves it, and he does it because he wants to, and he does it because he has to, and he does it because he needs this.

*I would just like to note that found family does not have to follow a nuclear formula with parent-child roles and I don't wish to propagate this misconception. That's just how Roier's family is structured in canon. Foolish and Vegetta are boyfriends and Roier calls them (or at least Foolish) "dad" that's just how it is and it is beautiful &lt;3

Also apologies if I get any lore wrong. I'm not a Roier or Cellbit main viewer but I learn a lot through what I do watch of their streams and what I absorb through my dash. Hopefully this still makes sense.

#qsmp #qsmp spiderbit wedding #spiderbit #guapoduo #qsmp cellbit #q!cellbit #spiderbit wedding #yeah i know that everyone's talking about the debates right now but ive been busy all week and im behind on vods #so here have a spiderbit wedding word-vomit post and ill talk about the debates later (maybe) #im reading this back to myself after posting and boy i sure do love italics huh lmao #edit: tiny amendment to this post (bc my brain wont shut up) but i should note that ofc jaiden is also part of roier's little family- #-but i didn't include her in the footnotes bc this post was already getting long and tbh the different kinds of families- #-on the island deserves its own post but i dont have any Big thoughts on the matter apart from it's vvvvv nice to see <3 #dont mind me im just rambling

[ganondoodle]

i often really do feel like an .. unwanted part of the fandom, i dont draw beautiful landscapes, i have unpopular but strong opinions im constantly annoying about and rarely change, dont like/dont draw the pretty young popular twinks and hot gurls to fanboi over nor do i turn characters into one, the opposite moreso, draw only one ship no ones heard of really, got little energy to interact with the few people that are nice to me and send me asks so it probably looks like im ignoring everyone and unfortunately but still rarely get so stressed i get overwhelmed and emotional about pehaps seemingly minor things and spiral almost into a breakdown feeling super embarrassed about it afterwards but the damage is already done and i look like a freak or agressive weirdo

#ganondoodles talks #also probably sounds like self pity #but this feeling hits everytime i see a super popular artist be the popular cool artist #i am a little weird i know that and thats not somethign bad i think #but the internet never gets to see that much of me #i tend to write posts when i am at my worst bc it has to go somewhere #so the image it tells people is that im a weirdly strong opiniod freak that gets breakdowns over nothing #i also dont feel like im otherwise -cool tm- enough to balance that out #i dont think my art is as stylized or as inventive as others nor am i cool to interact with bc idk how to be cool to interact with #i feel double bad when i misstepped with someone i used to talk to bc of something stupid ... or just dont know what i did wrong #im guessing its especially when i am in that spiraling state of mind where i really am not myself tbh #it still feels very bad bc i feel like i can never make it up to anyone again #sorry i acted like a jerk my brain was exploding in emotions in a desperate attempt to deal with something idk how to deal with- #-and made me not act like myself but now i feel really dumb about it #doesnt sound like a good excuse #... i want to thank those that do stick with me #even if i acted strange sometimes- even if i disappointed sometimes- even when i couldnt keep a promise #there are little things that still make me angry at myself #like that one time i asked in the tags whod read as long as the end of them and if someone did shoudl send me an ask so id draw a lil thing #and i got two #and i kept trying to remeber oh shit i need to do that and forgetting again/not having energy for it in a loop #i still feel like a jerk about it but now its probably too late #i wish i could answer all asks i get but man my energy for that is always rock bottom #no matter how much i enjoy the ask #and i love getting asks!!! #im sorry :((

[megafawna-permhiatus]

im just like if a dude was kind of also a chick.

#.talk #i dont mind the whole “man trapped in a woman's body” thing for myself but i dont really see it negatively necessarily. not that i dont hav #dysphoria. but i dont find myself having a lot of dysphoria about like. my curves or typically feminine features. its other thinfs. and a #lot of it just has to do with societal standards of maleness. i like being known as male and being called by traditionally male terms. and #find myself unhappy when people regard me as female. but i've been trying to just see my body as my body lately. im trying to keep my #happiness in check! and tbh i like my body. even if most would see it as female i see it as male becaue. well. im male. and it's my body.

[puppyeared]

Been LOVING your lil magician folks recently please continue they're beautiful and very cute and cool and also very well-designed!! 🥺❤️

thank you for the kind words !!! im not much of a writer, but i do have some sort of story in mind for them.. theyre bitter rivals who end up as roommates bc of their scatterbrained elderly landlord lol

#idk how much of it im gonna keep or change but thats basically the gist of it ^_^ #i dont know if i could ever write a solid linear story bc im very indecisive and tend to change things a lot so most of what i make ends up #very abstract or nonlinear.. just short drabbles or stuff that can be slotted into a general setting or premise #although i do want to challenge myself to try and write some sort of enemies/rivals to friends because i have a huge weak spot for that #dynamic!! i tend to be a little soft on my characters which i think has to do with me being a conflict avoidant person. so maybe exploring #this kind of dynamic will help me experiment with my sense of storytelling. although i cant promise it will be written well lol #im also thinking of making their story part of a bigger world so kinda like an omnibus?? i have another story in mind i think i can fit int #the same canon and itd be funny if theres like a bunch of wacky going ons between different apartment tenants nichijou style #but we'll see!!! thank you for your interest in these little shits!!!! #my art #myart #my oc #oc #presto #shuffle #house of cards #oc talk #ask #doodles #yapping

[sillycathorrors]

WILL WOOD WILL WOOD WILL WOOD WILL WOOD WILL WOOD WILL WOOD WILL WOOD WILL WOOD WILL WOOD WILL WOOD WILL WOOD WILL WOOD WILL WOOD WILL WO

#im actually LOSING MY MIND /pos #so ive had a bit of a will wood hyperfixation lately #and i was on call with my friend and mentioned i listen to him (we were talking about my search history. dont ask) and it was casually and #then my friend starts calling me out for listening to him by (just gently) teasing me on my mental state for listening to him and how his #music is mostly just screaming (sorta true) #so then i go on a rant #40 mins later ive played I/Me/Myself (a beginner will wood staple) AND skeleton appreciation day (one of my faves) also done the dishes #and made a 1hr 28min playlist made of entirely will wood/will wood and the tapeworms for my friend #and info dumped A LOT #so uh yeah #autism moment #will wood #will wood and the tapeworms #wee woo #im literally lying against the kitchen floor #i’ve encountered a second hand vanity #im an autistic baby strapped to a ceiling fan #and ive learnt to torture house cats like vultures

[crispywizardtale]

#im a day late but i met ForceBook so i dont mind missing any of the 8 series im currently watching #but i have to talk about this #i was blown away by the chemistry this 2 give off #this was such a powerful scene #the way Phaya gasped and froze when he realizes that Tharn just kissed him is so well shown #but also the way he accepts it and just wants more wants to enjoy this moment and ge everything he can #its like a switch has been switched on inside of Phaya but also inside Tharn because its like he solber ups for a moment when their eyes met #the connection they share is so powerful #i kind of wish they kissed here of just a tiny peck which would be followed by heavy breathing and intenese eye contact #but i still love this scene a lot #i love how in the 1st ep it was Tharn who lost his cool and leaned back on Phaya while in this ep it was mostly Phaya (Tharn was drunk) #is anyone else freaking out over the forehead kiss????? #only me okay... #also after the last gif i need Phaya and Tharn to do it on the cauntertop at least once in this series #like imagine is shirtless Phaya lifts Tharn like that... #i gave myself hope now.... and if we dont get it ill be disappointed.... #i love this series so much its my all time fave airing now #the sign #the sign the series #the sign series #billybabe #billy patchanon #asian bl #bl series #thai bl

[queseraphita]

Lies of P could exist in Yoko Taro's Drakenier universe, and no one would even notice it being anywhere out of place

*smacks my string conspiracy board*

WHITE CHOLORNATION SYNDROME

#i have enough hyperfixation to think about it tho #my current obsession and my well loved old obsession #bro it has been running in circles in my mind esp romeo :( #I'm a sucker for dark reimagined fairytales that love the source material while asking questions about humanity #*vibrates* i dont know how to express to you the hoops my little neurodivergent brain is shooting through #you honestly cant tell me that lies of p wouldn't exist in a distant future midgard of drakengard #drakengard #nier #lies of p #lop #im sorry for the tags but i am not sorry for the thoughts i have #it honestly makes me wanna reread or watch that 90s romeo and juliet movie i adore references and parallels #i wanna just write all of my thoughts down but it comes out like AHSFJUEBAAK #mikh talks #when i figure out wtf is goin on in sino its over for yall #i wanna play lies of p myself but i do know all the story and endings i just think it looks like a beautiful and well made game

[spaciebabie]

if you must use a protein mask/rice water for your hair i recommend using it in combination with a deep conditioner ESPECIALLY if your hair is prone 2 dryness or damaged from heat or coloring

#if your hair doesnt have enough protein it will be dry no matter how much product/deep conditioner you put in #you need the protein so that the moisture you're putting in doesnt just....fall out lmao. #ESPECIALLY IF YOU DYE YOUR HAIR A LOT #also sometimes people's hair get overloaded with how much protein is in a treatment. if thats you just dont use so much you should be fine #kjdfdjf #also you dont needta do this a lot >_> just when its apparent your hair needs it #im talking ta myself dont mind me #i like talkuing about my hair #and its maintenance b/c ppl usually dont grow up knowing this stuff 😭 (at least i didnt) #spacie spoinks #whenever people are like ''my hair has been so dry ever since i dyed it no matter what i do'' im liek...bestie...try a protein mask #of course there is a point where your hair can be damaged beyond repair #if like. you try protein masks (if its really bad try it multiple times but only on your hair wash days) + deep conditioner #and that still doesnt work...baby you aint fixin dat shit 😭😭

[pulsedemons]

drawing my favs as those cheesy office type motivational posters. it helps ^_^

#my art #doodle #mspaint #yes if i had a printer i would tack him to my wall #feppi #pizza tower #i like the look ive been getting by not using reference photos #that said i think while im still in this neutral sort of state itd be a good time to study the pt sprites again #would love to get a real good handle on the style. might look at some 90s/00s 'toons styles too #been wanting to draw moe more. been wanting to draw her in a style like ren & stimpy or eene or something #i think this ''not outright depressed but still not particularly hyped about art'' block (?) im in feels like a good state of mind #to actually sit down and study with. if that makes sense. dont mind me talking to myself down here im having late nite coffees #i stole the rest of moms oatmilk and its too late to go get normal milk so i have to use this kinda yucky chocolate creamer she got me #its not my first second third fourth or even fifth choice but ill still drink it . its not disgusting its just not. good.

[triptych-of-voids]

i know you say youre not a rp acc and not kin, but i wanted to ask, your art of medic, are you depicting yourself? should i refer to medic in your art as you? example "i love how you drew yourself in this"? idkk i dont wanna poke around but i wanted to be sure im referring to you correctly??

this is a good question, just one that im not sure i will ever be able to give a satisfying answer to. i did answer something similar here that im definitely not an rp account but im neutral on kinning, because the term seems so broad that i cant say for certain if thats whats going on. maybe! or maybe not! hmm and then my art of medic.. yes it is depicting myself. but i also recognize that medic is a fictional character, so it doesnt bother me if people refer to medic as medic! im just drawing him, it doesnt have to be more complicated than that. if that makes sense. its all one in the same to me so it doesnt matter and you dont have to worry about it :]€

#its in the same way i will make posts talking about medic sometimes or will sometimes answer asks in third person #im referring to myself because thats me but #i do understand that hes also fictional character from the video game Team Fortress 2 #and i know people have their own interpretations and ocs and whatever else #i try not to think about it too hard or i will only give myself a headache #tl;dr dont worry about changing the way you refer to medic on my posts i know what people are talking about #i will know what you mean #it does not bother me #i think i would actually find it Worse if someone refered to Only my drawings of medic as 'you/yourself' #but then talked about every other medic thing as normal #is this comprehensible...? i hope so #it feels like there was another thing i was going to say also.. but ive already forgotten it oh well #see i dont bite at least not at first #thank youu for the ask my friend!! #its just a difficult question to answer because i dont fully understand what is happening either #there has to be some way for me to explain this better i just havent found it yet #THE POINT IS thank you for asking and i dont mind please talk about things as you normally would. smiles ^^ #the doc is in #replies from the void

[roysspaghettiarm]

You literally only do Roy drawings and I couldn't thank you more. You're literally an angel and you deserve your pillow to be the right amount of chilly this night

Thank you :3

I draw Roy!! There are no words I could possibly use to describe how much of an inspiration he is to me, and how much he means to me, and I can only hope that it at least partially shows through my art 🥺

I would have never gotten where I am, and certainly wouldn't be who I am now, without him. He inspired me to create more, and to improve, and, really, I owe him my life. Roy is the best!!

I hope drawing Roy the most is what I get to be remembered by forever 😊

#DHMIS #DHMIS Roy #Roy Gribbleston #Don't Hug Me I'm Scared #Dont Hug Me Im Scared #Roy #DHMIS OC #OC #Puppetsona #roys spaghetti art #roys spaghetti ask #Funny you sent this when you did because I've been in a bit of a spiral lately about the... let's say point? of all this? #I hate talking about myself because I do not wish to be perceived like that outside of my Roy connection but I do wonder sometimes #if I stopped posting completely one day would anyone notice? Not stopped creating - mind - but if I just disappeared from the public view. #Have I succeeded in - through my art - giving myself meaning in anyone's eyes? Do I have value in the world? #These thoughts keep me up at night (even now it's past 3 in the morning haha). But it doesn't matter. #Roy means the world to me #And as long as there is Roy so am I <3 and Roy is eternal

[fairyhaos]

IT'S FUCKING ? !!? ;;;! FUCKING GIVING GOTH VILLAIN OVERLORD WHO LIVES IN A MANSION OVER A CLIFF AND TEARS MORTALS LIMB FROM LIMB FOR PLEASURE

#yena talks #joshua.svt #i said it guys #so????????? fuckint deranged for him oh my gOD #LOOK AT HIM IT'S GIVIBG VILLAINOUS CRIMINAL MASTERMIND #who sits on a black stone throne with a glass of wine in his hands as he smiles and says to fhe protagonist #“oh darling... you don't want to double cross me.” #FUCK?!! ;!?????? #dont mind me u guys im literally just voluntarily torturing myself w my own thoughts #seventeen #joshua

[takitori67]

Idk much about disorders and the likes (and everyone can absolutely correct me, pls) but Junao has something like amnesia, doesn't he. It's canon he wholly forgot Karna is his half-brother from Xmas event but also, like, what if he gets a spark of memories sometimes- occasionally. He could see a flash of something from just doing daily battles, from just hanging around, from just sleeping and dreaming, etc. and it always caught him off guard but the moment he consciously tried to grasp onto that snippet of memory it slipped away. Gone. And Junao once again didn't remember why he was shocked (and perhaps sad) in the first place

#im just having lunch and my mind does this #actually this has been in my head before. it was an old idea where junao caught a glimpse of memory about draupadi in his dream #but the moment he woke up he forgot entirely. and he wondered if something was wrong with his eyes (they teared up) #another idea is having a nightmare about his dead children #i have at least a dozen ideas i think. and i only got 1/5 done. pein #rambling and talking #oh another idea again: #junao: can you tell me their names? #arjuna: names? #junao: the names of ... your brothers #arjuna: oh #(jumps into a hole and buries myself alive) #i forgot quotation marks dont work again

[puppyeared]

what if i snapped and made an oc carrd

#i mean.... i could #this isnt the first time ive thought of doing it but i drop ocs so easily its not even funny. so idk if itd be worth it #id consider toyhouse or smth but i dont have money lol. right now everythings on artfight but thats more for drawing purposes #what ocs would i even talk abt... i have some standalones like auggie and ocs i think look cool but dont plan on using #but some others have their own stories.. not like a huge thought out plot but something i pick up and twirl around in my head #like luckys whole deal is being a hiking guide who accidentally gets tied up with some werewolves pretending to be a hiking group to eat pp #and then i have the magician rivals. although i kinda wanna tie theirs with the nightguard and thief story ive been cooking. maybe in the #same universe? it would be pretty funny if they lived in the same apartment complex since a couple stories i have in mind revolve around th #its like some sort of omnibus or anthology to me. kicks my feet #and then fan characters like xin ya and sleight who i want to have their own expanded lore and stuff. i think that would be cool #im making crow a powerpoint of xins updated lore but the assignmence are making it hard. hopefully it turns out good though #i have a hard time writing personality and xins is always the hardest bc theyre probably the least like me. i tend to stick to #characters similar to myself to get in their head. but bc their backstory affects their personality so strongly i have to do some thinking #anyway. hopefully i remember this later #yapping #oc #oc talk #ive also been playing neko atsume recently for nostalgia and why did we as a society ever stop playing it. its so chill #you just take pictures of silly little cats and leave them silly little toys and treats. and the music is cute

[marsixm]

i complain about being alone but i like do not want to date lmao i want to already be married to my soulmate for 10 years

#this is why im not really upset at myself for having an unattainable crush occupying my mind lately #if homeboy and his wife decide to go poly and i get to be his little bf who comes on the family camping trips ill be set #but in the meantime i dont care bc i dont wanna date! i just dont! #i also complain about everyone else calling and talking to their friends for hours but i get shy when someone texts me so womp womp #(also thats kind of a lie i love the fact that ive done all these things alone! i think its cool) #(of course i WOULD love it if my soulmate im old gay married to was there too but alas!!!)