Oh No, Emotions! Ch. 05
5. Of overly dramatic mornings and other weird things
Hastie didn't know what to think of the events, when he first heard of it.
His first reaction was to blow up: “YOU SCRATCHED YOURSELF, HENRY??? WHAT DID WE SAY ABOUT HURTING YOURSELF?!”
Then his surprise at Miss Hyde's behaviour: “Huh. So she is a decent human being after all. I was pretty worried, when Luise said she wanted to house a criminal. Not to mention her behaviour this morning. So she is … what's it called? A jerk with a heart of gold?”
Luise laughed in the background: “Yes, you could say that.”
Speaking of her, she was currently watching the evening news. Hastie had heard her mutter something about stupid politicians, before she had answered his statement.
Pensively he looked at her, as she was watching the news.
She didn't look as regal as usual. Her elegant fourragères and plait bun were undone and her long yellow hair was freely flowing down her shoulders and back.
After all these years they had known each other, she still managed to make him blush. And who could blame him? The German noblewoman was beautiful. She was only a year younger than him, yet she still looked like sweet seventeen.
Often he wondered what she possibly saw in someone like him. Him, a boring, unattractive-
“Don't even go there”, she spoke up, “If you dare think that you're unattractive or inferior to me, I will slap you.”
He chuckled: “Yes, Milady. As you wish.”
She turned her head to look at him. “Seriously, stop it. Do you think I would have put a ring on that, if I thought that you're unattractive or dull?”
“She's got you there, Hastie”, Henry remarked.
The white-haired man glared at him. “Don't think that you're off the hook, Jekyll! You promised that you wouldn't do it again and what do you do?”
“I'm sorry, I panicked!”
“Boys, please!”, Gabriel begged.
“Yes”, Luise agreed, “Drop the matter, you two. There is nothing we can do now. Let's be grateful to Miss Hyde that she knew what to do.”
“Yes”, Henry whispered quietly. “I never would have expected her to be so … empathetic. I mean, what with her criminal record and her dismissive behaviour earlier.”
“Delinquents are humans too”, Luise informed him deadpan, “And you'd be surprised at how understanding many of them can be. Especially those like her, who have known nothing but misery. She doesn't know what sorrows rich people have, but she knows what pain is.”
“Luise? Can I ask you something?”
“Of course you can.”
“She said that she has been a 'street rat' for half of her life.”
“That's correct.”
“But how can she have been homeless at the age of ten? Was there no one to take care of her? Parents? Foster parents? Child protection service? Not even an orphanage?”
That's a good question, Hastie thought. Who would let that happen? No wonder the girl is messed up.
Luise looked sombre. “Sometimes the world is that cruel. But that's something you should ask her. Not yet, though. She doesn't trust you and even if she did, she's not ready to talk about it. Let's just say, that no one should know the kind of life she has known, especially at such a young age. So don't take offence, if she answers your friendliness with gruffness. She's just not used to people being nice to her without having ulterior motives.”
Ulterior motives? What doe she – oh my God!
“I see, you understand what I'm getting at”, she observed sadly.
“But that's terrible!”, he cried in horror.
“It is”, she agreed. “Listen boys, she may have a long criminal record, but for each crime she committed, she suffered at least twice as much.”
“But what with the murder?”, Hastie asked in concern.
“It wasn't murder”, Gabriel spoke up. “It was manslaughter. She killed the man in self-defence, as has been proven. In other words, she killed someone, but she's not a murderess. In fact, she turned herself in and confessed everything, when she realised what she had done.”
“You see”, Luise added, “She acts purely out of instinct and on what she considers logical. She had to teach herself everything she knows. No one has ever taught her what's right and what's wrong. So it's now up to us to provide guidance, because we're older and wiser. Or, at least that is what we're supposed to be”, she added teasingly.
Everyone snorted.
Edwina awoke to the chirping of birds. When she opened her eyes, she found herself in the soft, clean bed in the light, big room she had fallen asleep in.
Am I still dreaming?, she wondered.
Just for good measure, she pinched herself in the arm.
It hurt.
So she wasn't in some crazy dream after all.
The brunette yawned and stretched herself, before hopping out of bed and looking around. Looking down at herself, she was wearing the pyjama the Lady had bought her yesterday.
Huh … someone actually bought me something. I still can't believe it. And I was fucking there!
She shrugged and went to her new wardrobe to pick some clothes for today.
And now she found herself confronted with a problem she'd never had before in her life: what the hell should she wear?!
“Well, shit”, she muttered.
In the end, she grabbed just something, put on a morning coat and went to the bathroom, carefully looking around, if someone was coming down the hallway.
Then she went to the bathroom, knocking on the door for good measure.
“Who is it?”, a male voice answered.
Oh, it's Mr. Utterson.
“Morning!”, Edwina answered. “Do you need much longer?”
“Oh! Good morning, Miss Hyde! Don't worry, I don't take as long as my friends do”, he replied in a humorous manner.
She snorted.
Indeed it didn't take long until he was finished. As soon as he came out, she slipped past him into the bathroom and locked the door.
When she had finished her shower and wanted to put her clothes on, her glance fell upon a full body mirror. She couldn't remember, when she had last – if ever – seen one.
With mixed feelings she regarded her reflection.
She wasn't beautiful.
Not even pretty.
Not even decent looking.
She was too small, too slight and too pale.
Wrinkles of displeasure blemished her already unpleasant face.
Her eyes were sunken-in and had dark rims around them, as if she was dead or really sleep-deprived. Their glance was piercing, feral and unsettling. Not to mention the colour. They were of a painfully bright, shrill green. Wasn't there a name for that shade of green? Acid green? Bilious green? Something like that. It definitely was an unpleasant colour. That she knew, because few people could bear to look her in the eyes.
Everyone else in this house was prettier, whether they were overall good-looking or not.
Mr. Utterson wasn't particularly handsome. At first glance he looked rather dull. His jet black hair was turning grey (the small curl falling into his face was cute, though) and she had only seen him smile twice so far. But his sky blue eyes were warm and kind.
Dr. Lanyon wasn't much of a looker either. He had silver hair, red cheeks and laughing wrinkles. He was smaller than his two friends, rather petite for a man. However, he had the aura of a down-to-earth, cheerful person, whom old age suited well. Not to mention his differently coloured eyes were totally awesome.
Lady Summers was simply beautiful. She was as small as Edwina, but in a cute way. Her skin was lily white and she had rosy cheeks and lips. And how could anyone have so naturally yellow hair? Her ice blue eyes were knowing. Nothing gave her true age away. She had no wrinkles and her hands (usually a dead give-away for someone's age) were little, dainty and neat.
And of course there was Dr. Jekyll. Only at their introduction he had been at his best, but he was, without a doubt, an attractive man. He was tall and slender. His wheat blond hair had been perfectly styled and trimmed. His light brown eyes had a soft, gentle glow and his entire bearing was inviting and sweet. And god, he had the most beautiful smile she had ever seen.
Edwina shook these thoughts out of her head.
She had to stop right there. Like hell would she allow anyone to get close to her. Besides, she had only met them yesterday. How could she be sure that these people weren't like all the others? That she wouldn't be used like it had happened before?
The brunette banished these thoughts also. This was no time for dark memories. She would not think about it.
She took a deep breath and got dressed.
Turning in front of the mirror, she was surprised to find, that her new clothes actually looked pretty nice on her. Huh. So wearing nice clothes could actually make you a bit happy after all.
Now she could smile.
Another day, another chance.
“Oh, you were pretty quick”, Gabriel remarked, when Miss Hyde came downstairs into the kitchen for breakfast.
“Well, I don't waste much time on the futile attempt of making myself look pretty”, she retorted drily. “What matters is that I'm clean.”
“Fair point”, he agreed, “Physical beauty is overrated. What lies beneath is more important.”
“A lot of people say that”, Miss Hyde replied coldly, “But in truth they're just as superficial as the rest.”
The lawyer frowned. “Hey now”, he objected, “Don't throw us all in one pot. Not everyone is like this.”
“Oh yeah? Give me an example!”, she challenged
He didn't have to think for long. “If Luise was superficial, she wouldn't have taken you in”, he supplied. “If Henry was superficial, he wouldn't be married to someone like me. If Hastie was superficial, he wouldn't be friends with us. If I was superficial, I wouldn't have taken up your case.”
He stopped and lifted an eyebrow.
“Do you want me to continue, Miss Hyde? Or was that enough?”, he asked pointedly.
She avoided his eyes and muttered something unintelligible that sounded like she was admitting defeat.
He sighed in frustration and folded his fingers.
“Listen, if you don't like us or don't trust us, that's fine. But that does not excuse such behaviour. We hardly know each other and you know nothing about us, save from the things you have seen so far. So before you have the audacity to judge us, how about you take some time getting to know us first? Don't judge a book by its cover. Has no one ever taught you that?”
Silently she shook her head. Her hair was shadowing half of her face, but still he could see that her lower lip was quivering.
Oh my god, I didn't make her cry, did I?, he thought in shock.
“Miss Hyde? Are you alright?”, he inquired gingerly.
Suddenly she threw her head back and laughed hysterically.
“Of course I'm alright!”, she giggled, “What gives you the idea that I'm not?”
“You mean apart from your hysterical fake laughter?”, the lawyer deadpanned.
He bent forward and took her hand. She twitched and almost tore her hand away, but seemed to change her mind at the very last millisecond.
“Did I upset you? If so, I'm sorry.”
“Why are you apologising?”, she sniffled, “I was being a bitch!”
There was fright in her green eyes. Gabriel realised immediately what the real matter was.
His grip around her trembling hand tightened.
“Miss Hyde”, he told her gently, “You won't get kicked out, especially not because of something so stupid. You said yourself that you've never been among polite company before, didn't you? We know better than to expect you to be a model citizen. Once you get adjusted to your new life-”
“But how? I've never been around people like you … I don't know what to do!”
“The knowledge comes with time”, Gabriel assured the young woman, “You're young, Miss Hyde. You have all the time you need. I'm sure you will find your place here.”
He let go of her hand and stood up.
“Now how about some breakfast? Good food always cheers me up!”
She grinned lopsidedly. “And you're still that thin?”
He grinned back. “The perks of having a high metabolism.”
Now her laughter was genuine. “So do I! Looks like we do have something in common, aye?”
She stopped laughing and scratched her head awkwardly. “Sorry for that earlier.”
He smiled: “It's nothing. And like I said: don't worry about being kicked back into the street. No one in this house is cruel enough to do something like that.”
The grateful, shy smile he got in return was honestly so adorable.
“One more thing though, Miss Hyde.”
“Hm?”
“Henry and Hastie should be coming down any minute. And if I may give you some advice: don't talk to them, before they had their morning coffee. Luise and I are the only morning people in this group, aside from her employees.”
She laughed again.
Henry was moody. He was always moody in the morning, but now he was moody extraordinaire. He didn't even know why. Or why he was up this early, despite being on a holiday. Maybe it was because he hated lying in bed without Gabriel by his side.
Normally he would have walked downstairs just wearing his morning coat, but then he had remembered that now they had a young lady living with them. And he refused to walk around half naked in front of Miss Hyde. She probably wouldn't mind that much, but it was still inappropriate.
“Mornin'”, he grumbled to Hastie, who was looking just as grumpy as he felt.
Hastie grunted in reply and together they trotted downstairs.
When they arrived in the living room, both stopped dead in their tracks at the scene that was going on at the breakfast table.
Henry was pleasantly surprised to see his husband cheerfully converse with Miss Hyde. His mood brightened immediately. She looked much more at ease than yesterday.
And he couldn't help but skim over Miss Hyde. Now that she was refreshed and wearing real clothing, she didn't look so bad.
I wonder if she's aware of how cute her smile is, he thought.
Finally Hastie broke the spell by wishing the two of them a good morning.
Gabriel looked up. “Oh, good morning you two! Miss Hyde and I have just finished breakfast. Yours is waiting for you on the counter, you only have to warm it up.”
“Morning”, Miss Hyde said, albeit more reserved than his husband.
He requited her greeting with a gentle smile.
“How has your first night in your new home?”, he inquired curiously.
“Nice enough”, she replied. “I don't think I ever slept that long in my entire life. Slept like a rock.”
“And yet she was up at half past five in the morning”, Gabriel commented.
“Hey, I slept a bit more than six hours! That's a lot for me.”
Henry preferred not to think about why that was so. It was too early for depressing thoughts.
“And why are you up so early, Doctor?”, the brunette wanted to know. “Aren't you on a holiday?”
Now it was his turn to shrug. “Eh, you know, I'm a clingy bastard, who can't sleep without his husband”, he explained lightly.
Hastie snorted: “Damn right you're a clingy bastard! You're lucky Gabriel is so willing to indulge you!”
“Certainly am”, Henry agreed and gave his husband a loving smile (which was promptly requited).
“It's too early for this mush”, Hastie muttered and went to warm up his breakfast.
Henry didn't care about breakfast. Instead he sat at his husband's side, clasped his hand and leaned into the black-haired man's shoulder.
Sadly, Miss Hyde seemed to be just as uncomfortable with PDA as Hastie.
She grimaced and cleared her throat: “Guys, can you please tone it down? It makes me feel really awkward to have people be all lovey-dovey around me.”
“Oh thank you so much!”, the blond heard his friend groan in the background. He resisted the urge to stick his tongue at him and removed himself from his husband.
Gabriel only chuckled.
After fifteen minutes he stood up and announced that he had to go to work, much to Henry's frustration.
Why couldn't Gabe take a vacation too?
On the edge of his senses, he could hear Miss Hyde ask Hastie: “Are they always like this?”
And the other doctor groaned in response: “You have no idea, Miss Hyde. Usually it's worse!”
“Oh shut up!”, the blond retorted, “Not everyone can be as cagey as you and Luise!”
“Oi!”, Miss Hyde barked, “Can it, both of you! I don't give a shit about your love life!”
The doctors exchanged an awkward look, before apologising to their new lodger.
She huffed. “I'm going back to my room. You guys enjoy your breakfast. Oh by the way: feeling better, Dr. Jekyll?”
For a second he blinked in confusion. Then it sunk in.
“O-oh!”, he stuttered and blushed, “Y-yes, I am, thank you.”
“Good”, she stated and left.
Hastie looked after the young girl.
Of course he had noticed how chipper she had been until Henry and Gabriel had billed and cooed.
Miss Hyde was envious, that was crystal clear.
She likely had never known love or happiness in her life. So seeing his friends so happy with each other must have been painful for her.
He knew that feeling.
It was painful for him too.
The brunette slammed her door shut and flopped down on her bed.
Bleh.
All the mushiness had ruined her good mood.
Something nagged at her core at seeing how happy and lovey-dovey Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Utterson were.
That feeling was envy, there was no way around it. She had felt it often enough to recognise it and by now she had come to terms with it.
Edwina had never been loved.
No one had ever cared about her and she could count on her fingers how often someone had even been genuinely kind to her.
Nothing was for free, she had learned that the hard way.
It wasn't fair!
Why were others allowed to be happy and loved – so many didn't even deserve it! – while people like her just existed at rock bottom without deserving it at all?
Why did all those people have someone who truly cared, while she knew nothing but cruelty and indifference?
And people wondered why she was so snappy!
A big lump gathered in her throat. For a second she wanted to hold it back. But then she remembered, that she was in a safe environment and that no one would witness a breakdown, as long as her door was locked.
So she curled up, buried her face in her pillow and let the waterworks begin.
Hastie had spoken a few stern words to him.
At first Henry had thought that he was just being jealous (that happened sometimes, they were exes after all), but then the white-head had brought up Miss Hyde's reaction.
“She envies you two, Henry. And by that I don't mean the petty kind of envy. She probably doesn't know love and seeing it in you two …”
“It's alright”, the blond had cut in. “I understand.”
So he had finished his breakfast and returned upstairs.
Miss Hyde's room was at the end of the corridor, next to his old, vacant room (he had moved into Gabriel's after their wedding).
When he got to her door, he could hear faint whimpers from the inside.
Should I knock now? Or maybe I should wait until she has calmed down a bit? Maybe she won't like that I obviously heard her breakdown, but I'm concerned, so-
Choosing the former, he knocked softly.
“Miss Hyde?”, he called out gently. “It's me, Dr. Jekyll.”
He had expected a dismissive answer like 'Get lost' or 'Leave me alone'. What he hadn't expected was to have the door open to reveal a very miserable looking Miss Hyde. Her eyes were puffy and reddened and full of grief.
“What do you want?”, she muttered. Her voice sounded even huskier than usual, probably from the crying.
“If you don't mind, can we talk?”
She seemed unsure, but nodded.
That doctor certainly knew how to treat a woman, she had to hand him that.
Throughout the entire talk he was nothing but tactful and understanding and she felt better within minutes. She let him know that she had never known love. Otherwise she refused to talk about her shitty life.
But it wasn't necessary anyway.
“What kind of life have you known?”, he asked in distress.
“A shitty one”, she drily let him know, “I'll tell you that much.”
He bit his lip. And was that tears she saw in his eyes?
“Why are you crying?”, she asked in confusion.
“Sorry”, he sniffed, “You probably hate pity.”
“Damn right, I do”, she confirmed crossly.
“But it isn't fair!”, he cried in distress, “I don't know much about you, but I'm pretty sure you have done nothing to deserve such a life! God, you're much too young to know so much pain.”
“Well, God doesn't care”, Edwina retorted cynically, “He's as dead as the motherfucking son of a bitch I accidentally killed.”
The blond doctor shifted uncomfortably. “Uhm … if you don't mind me asking …”
“What happened?”, she guessed. When he nodded, she scowled: “Wanker tried to rape me. Wouldn't have been the first time, but I snapped. When I came to my senses, his brain matter was all over the place. It was really gross.”
“Well, he deserved it then”, Dr. Jekyll growled.
That took her by surprise. He actually sided with her?
“Assaulting a young lady …”
“I'm not a lady”, she grumbled, but failed to fight off the blush.
The blond man smiled. “Well, I see you as one, whether you like it or not. And I'm sorry that I tore your old wounds open.”
She scoffed bitterly: “Don't beat yourself up. They never closed to begin with.”
Then her eyes widened.
Dr. Jekyll had wrapped his arms around her and was holding her tightly.
“What are you doing?!”, she demanded to know.
“It's called a hug.”
“I know that, but why?!”
“Because you need one”, he said simply.
Now Edwina was at loss.
No one had ever hugged her before. This was way more intimate than all the times she had whored around. She felt vulnerable and that frightened her.
But she didn't want it to end.
Being hugged by Dr. Jekyll felt right. His arms were warm and comfortable and for the first time in her life, she felt safe.
Is that what kids feel like, when their parents hug them?, she wondered.
“You smell like cinnamon”, she noted.
He laughed. “I don't like eau de cologne that much, so I use cinnamon perfume instead.”
“What about my scent?”, she asked curiously.
She didn't use perfume, but she had showered earlier, so-
He seemed to be confused for a second. Then he lifted an eyebrow.
“Wouldn't that be kind of creepy of me to sniff you? I mean, I'm fifty and you-”
The brunette scoffed: “You haven't seen creepy, Doc! Don't worry about it.”
She felt him shift a little. Then his nose buried itself in her fluffy hair.
“Pomegranates and cherries”, he whispered. “It's nice.”
“Thanks.”
Why the bloody hell am I blushing? I asked for his opinion!
Good thing he couldn't see her face, because it was buried in his chest.
After a while of sitting there in his embrace, she wanted out and began to squirm.
He let go.
“Like I said earlier”, he spoke up, “I'm sorry that your first morning in your new home was so emotionally taxing.”
“Eh, it's fine.”
He smiled gently. “Would you allow me to make up for it? Have some ice cream, if it's fine with you? My treat, of course.”
Is he trying to lure me? No, he's genuinely meaning well, I see it in his eyes. There is nothing false in it. But why – oh, who cares! It's fucking ice cream!
“Hell yeah, Doc!”
“Great! Get ready then! I'll get my coat and wallet and then we can go.”
When Luise left her office to get lunch, she had to cross the entrance hall. And right in that moment, Henry and Miss Hyde were coming in.
For a second she was confused, but when she heard their thoughts and read their minds, she had to smile.
He took her out for ice cream? How adorable!
Miss Hyde said something to Henry and he laughed heartily. Then the brunette noticed her.
“Hey there, Lady!”, she called and waved a hand.
Luise laughed and waved back. “Hello, Miss Hyde. I see, you're having fun”, she chuckled.
The younger woman nodded excitedly.
“He took me to a chic café and first I felt totally underdressed and stuff, but the personnel was really nice and all and the food was awesome and damn! We ordered and our portions were so huge! I'm seriously so full right now!”
“Did you enjoy your strawberry and cherry ice cream with chocolate sauce?”, she asked curiously.
She knew that this was a creepy question, but she couldn't help herself.
“Luise!”, Henry said warningly.
Miss Hyde looked suspicious. “How do you know?”, she asked warily. “I said nothing of that. And there is no way you were there! I would have noticed you!”
The blonde laughed awkwardly, while Henry glowered at her.
“That question is impossible to answer without sounding like a crazy idiot”, she admitted.
The brunette frowned. “Well, I'm crazy … I act like an idiot sometimes … so hit me with it!”
The doctor was still glaring. “Yes, Luise, hit her with it! I'd like to see how you'll explain something so unbelievable!”
She took the easy way and bluntly said: “I'm a telepath.”
There was awkward silence.
The doctor pinched his nose in frustration, but said nothing.
Good grief, Luise! Did you really have to be so literal?!
“Okay, I'm sorry, Henry! I know what you expected, but there is no other way of putting it!”
Why did you have to do it to begin with?!
“I just couldn't help myself! You know me!”
Miss Hyde stared at her incredulously.
“A telepath”, she echoed blankly.
Luise nodded.
“You mean, you can read my thoughts and junk.”
Another nod.
“But that's bullshit!”, she exclaimed.
The small blonde raised her hands. “Listen, I know you think that I'm a sham (and that's perfectly reasonable), but I can prove that I'm not!”
“Oh yeah?”, the younger woman grumbled.
“I know that he's taken you to that specific café without me being told anything and I also know precisely what you and Henry had – which in his case was salt and caramel and chocolate ice cream with chocolate sauce and a banana – but like you said, I wasn't there. My servants and the clients I spoke to this morning can confirm, that I haven't left the house today yet. As for when we first met – when you tried to mug me – do you think I would have let you go, if I hadn't known just how bleak your situation was? Or that I would have agreed to become your landlady, knowing that you're a delinquent on parole?”
Said delinquent stared at her for several minutes straight.
Then she collapsed.
“Miss Hyde!”, Henry cried and caught her in his arms.
“Way to go, Luise!”, he reproached the German lady with a death glare. “And that on her first morning! Couldn't you have waited at least a week, before confronting her with your paranormal abilities?!”
“Again, I'm sorry!”, she snapped, “But she would have confronted me herself sooner or later anyway! She is perceptive like that!”
Miss Hyde cleared her throat: “Guys, I'm still here.”
The doctor turned to her. “How are you feeling? Can you stand?”
“I'm fine”, the brunette mumbled, but allowed them to help her up. “I just need to let that sink in. It doesn't make any sense.”
“If it makes you feel better, I don't know how it's possible either. All I know is that I can read people's minds and use it to do crazy things”, Luise explained.
Awkwardly she scratched the back of her head.
“I owe you a thousand apologies, Miss Hyde. You already had a way too dramatic morning and I shouldn't have assaulted you with something so insane.”
Suddenly Miss Hyde looked very uncomfortable. “But … if you can read my mind … how much do you know about me?”
“Let's talk about that once you trust me enough”, the older woman accommodated her. “Now, how about we help you to your room, so you can have some alone time?”
“I don't need help!”, the brunette snapped. However, as soon as they let her go, her legs wobbled and gave away again. “Never mind”, she mumbled in defeat, “I don't think I can make a step.”
Henry sighed: “Well, I guess I have to carry you, then.”
“Don't you dar-WHOA!!!”
The young woman immediately clutched the older man's pullover to keep herself from falling.
Luise giggled.
“What's so funny?”, Miss Hyde hissed in agitation.
“Nothing. It's just a rather romantic sight”, she told them nonchalantly.
“SHUT UP!!!”, the two snapped in unison.
“Let's go, Miss Hyde. That's quite enough tommy-rot for one day”, Henry grumbled and carried the blushing brunette off.
Luise grinned after them.
Oh dear. Perhaps I should inform Gabriel, that there is an emotional connection building up between the two …
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