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#dumbass academia love
dactylicreveries · 7 months
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-Ocean Vuong, from “Eurydice”, Night Sky with Exit Wounds
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*The squad is having dinner together*
Kirishima: Denki, can you pass the salt?
Denki: *blinks and clears his throat.* Of COURSE
Denki: *Throws a screaming Bakugou across the table*
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9r7g5h · 4 months
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The Downside of Trusting a Dumbass
Fandom: My Hero Academia, Boku no Hero Academia 
Rating: T
Genre: Humor/Partial Soc Med AU
Summary: He wasn’t actually stupid.
In the height of responsibility and intelligence, he even took one of the free condoms that had been scattered across the board, making sure to put the tiny pushpin back in place once he had detached the condom from the cork.
Words: 1,794
Denki knew that, sometimes, he was impulsive, and that impulsiveness could be considered stupidity.
He wasn’t actually stupid. He’d gotten into the same college as everyone else, and had enough scholarships that he would graduate without too much debt in the end. Just, you know, sometimes he acted without fully thinking things through, because he had the thoughts and wanted to see what would happen on the other side. Like the time when he threw bath bombs into the reflection pool on campus to see if they would actually dissolve despite it only be lukewarm. Or when he ordered twenty-seven pizzas to that Greek party he wasn’t actually going to, because he knew Kirishima was going to be there and bros made sure bros were fed, but forgot to prepay or tell anyone. Or when he accidently blew out the electricity to the dorms because he wanted to see what would happen when he connected three generators together and hooked them up while the power was still on.
He was just a man of science, really, just people didn’t appreciate his scientific explorations. Especially his roommates, though he could kind of see why. If the three of them weren’t involved with his ideas (which Bakugou rarely was, though Sero and Kirishima more often than not were), they were cleaning up after him, so he could see why that was annoying. But that didn’t mean he was stupid.
Right now, for example. The student union had been putting on a whole thing about safe sex for the last two weeks, and he was actually standing there reading the board! Taking pictures and everything, even putting down the numbers listed in his phone, just in case. He wasn’t dating anyone, no, but it was still good information to have for whenever he got some future mythical partner. He'd been flirting a lot with that Shinso guy who worked at the library, so who knows!
In the height of responsibility and intelligence, he even took one of the free condoms that had been scattered across the board, making sure to put the tiny pushpin back in place once he had detached the condom from the cork. Someone was obviously keeping the board stocked as students took what they needed, and it would just be rude to make their job harder. Double checking the expiration date, Denki cheerfully slid the condom into his wallet before leaving for his next class, whistling quietly to himself as he preened over this little reminder of just how smart he was.
*~*
Living in a quad had its pros and cons.
Pros, it was a 24/7 sleepover with three of his favorite people, full of fun, laughter, late night conversations about the nature of the universe, good food, and only a few death threats each day. If he needed help on any of his school work, it was easy to just roll over in bed and stare at Katsuki until he gave in and answered whatever question he had, meaning his grades stayed high without him having to pull out any of his perfect hair (though he did still go to the library. Had to see that sleep deprived cutie). Game nights were easy to schedule; just make sure all four of them were there, grab something, and verbally challenge their manhoods. He never slept through his morning classes, and had he mentioned the food? The school cafeteria food was fine, and the number of fast food restaurants on campus were great, but all three of his roomies were great cooks, meaning Denki had quickly put on that freshmen, sophomore, and junior 45.
Cons? Whenever one of his friends brought someone home the rest of them were banished to one of the dorm study rooms, meaning every single Thursday night saw him, Kirishima, and Sero waiting until Katsuki let them come back home. Because his weekly date nights with Izuku were sacred, he would kill them if they came back early, and none of them wanted to be the reason the green-haired sunshine bunny boy teared up at a date ending early.
That had happened exactly once, and still haunted them.
So it was strange when all, halfway through a round of Mario Kart and still hours away from Katsuki letting them come home, all three of their phones started buzzing like crazy.
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Denki quickly stood, patting his pockets to check, ignoring the looks Kirishima and Sero were giving him. This was his time. His moment. He’d forgotten his wallet.
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Denki flopped back onto the couch, crossing his arms behind his head, more than pleased with himself. He had provided an indispensable service today, had been there for one of his best bros, and was getting pancakes tomorrow for it. Denki was more than pleased.
A feeling that just increased when they were eventually allowed back into the dorm, the three of them ignoring the extra, softly snoring lump in Katsuki’s bed. Not that they could have looked even if they wanted to, his protective mastiff of a boyfriend eyeing them all carefully to make sure none of them did more than glance in their direction, and even that got bared teeth and a scowl that promised death. Though Katsuki did, not as reluctantly as normal, return the high five Denki held out for him, his lips almost in a smirk before he settled down to curl around Izuku’s back.
A feeling that was overwhelming when, at the little bit of free space they had set up a table in so they could all eat and play games together, Izuku sat the next morning wearing Katsuki’s clothes, looking soft and happy and picking at one of the plate of pancakes Katsuki was cheerfully bringing into the room. The human equivalent of a shit bomb was smiling, for fuck’s sake, freely leaning down to kiss Izuku whenever they were close enough, seemingly uncaring of his friends seeing the disgustingly adorable PDA.
He, Denki, had done that. His intelligent forethought had led to this, and the delicious platter of chocolate chip pancakes sitting in his lap. There was no way anyone could call him a dumbass now.
*~*
“Hey babe, what’s up?”
It wasn’t uncommon for Katsuki to just accept phone calls from Izuku while they were all supposed to be working and put them on speaker; it was almost appreciated, hearing their friend ramble about his classes and what kinds of things he’d done that day with his roommate and respective squad. Izuku’s voice was just soothing, even if he thought otherwise, and a welcome break from trying to destroy their brains with formulas and equipment names and safety regulations.
“Don’t ‘babe’ me, Katsuki. I’m pregnant.”
For a long moment it seemed like none of them could breathe, none of them could move, all they could do was sit there and stare at the phone on Katsuki desk. Waiting for Izuku to say something like “April Fool’s day” or “Happy opposite day, fuck you,” just something like that. Despite the fact they were in October, that in the last few years Izuku and Katsuki had been dating Deku had never been into holidays like that, and this wasn’t something he would prank about.
Katsuki was pale, paler than usual, his eyes wide and mouth partly open as he tried to figure out what to say. Finally, he seemed to settle on something. “But...but the condoms...”
"Only effective when used right, which I'm starting to think you don't know how to do,” Izuku snipped, the sounds of him walking somewhere in the background of the phone call. “Think about what you want to do. I’ll be there in a few hours.”
"Is that Bakugou?" Ochako's voice, while a bit distant and tinny, was still loud enough to be heard through the speaker, angry and sharp. "Tell him he better get used to being the ball-less wonder, I'm coming for him! Toga gave me a knife!"
"Ochako, no!" The fact that they were on the phone seemed forgotten as the two friends began to squabble, the call quickly dropping, leaving the room in silence. For a long moment they all just sat there, the three of them watching as Katsuki's head fell into his hands. It was Kirishima who finally broke it, clearing his throat as he tried to sound casual.
"Bro, did you... was there... did any of them-"
"No, shitty hair, none of the condoms fucking broke," Katsuki growled, lifting his head to glare at them all. "If it had and I thought this was an actual possibility, do you think I'd really be this freaked right now?"
“This kind of shit just happens sometimes,” Sero cut in, looking over at Kirishima with the well known shut the hell up before you get yourself killed look he had perfected over the last few years. “Manufacturing defects, latex decay, sometimes random things just happen and there’s even a small hole in them. You couldn’t have known, bro. Any idea what you want to do?”
While Katsuki, Sero, and Kirishima began discussing and processing his feelings and options, things they were all sure Izuku was doing with at least Ochako, if not the rest of his friends, Denki was silent. Silent and running through the vague memories of that day all those weeks ago in the student union, of the small pushpin he had put back into the cork board without a thought.
Maybe he really was a dumbass.
When Izuku and Ochako showed up a while later he was still quiet, more than happy to leave the room with the others to let the couple talk. Or, rather, help drag Ochako and her pair of scissors from the room with them, Izuku just looking exasperated as he plucked them from her hands, thanking them all pleasantly for giving him and Katsuki privacy to talk about their new situation. Happy to just sit there and listen to his friends talk and argue and theorize in the study room, only commenting when he was spoken to, never fully interacting as he sat in that new revelation of his stupidity. With everything going on, no one seemed inclined to question his silence, happy to let him exist in the chaos as the rest of them planned and prepared for whatever announcement waited for them back in the room.
A silence they all, Denki himself included as he ran away from a pissed Katsuki, just barely dodging the chair Izuku had thrown at his head, his aim only just off because his other arm was occupied by their sleeping baby girl, wished he had kept when he came clean and asked for godfather rights a few months later.
Hey. It’d seemed like a good idea at the time.
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dumbassacademia · 8 months
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Me: hey do you remember what my first word was?
Dad: No, sorry, but your mom might
Me: she doesn’t, that’s why I asked you
Dad: Oh. Well we might have a baby book for you, it’d be in there I bet
Me: mom made my baby book when I was ten, that’s when I asked her for the first time what my first word was
Dad: Oh
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pranabray · 1 year
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The silence that brought us together also had the power to tear us apart.
Pranab Ray
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bloodypeachblog · 1 year
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I love to think that Spinner played Final Fantasy 7 or read Berserk and thought, "aw hell yeah giant swords are cool! .....but you know what'd be even cooler?" Next day, he debuts with this bullshit:
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mha-vilain-au · 2 years
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There is two types of siblings:
Izuku: Tom, ok don't be mad but maybe I made a mini-hero friend and the bonding time went to the south... Anyway we have a corpse who need to disappear quickly.
Tomura: I'm here in two minutes. If we're fast we can make it before Kurogiri notices something.
.
Tosho: Dabi! I accidentally set the trash can on fire and I tried to freeze it but now the ice is on fire and I don't know what to do!!
Dabi: Sounds like a "you" problem.
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crooked-ketterdam · 2 months
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I long for you like Kafka longed for Milena 😩
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toonblade · 1 year
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Moxy’s Fantober/OCartober 2022 Day 2: Friend
Work beat the tar out of me, but I persevered. A bit over the line, but hey, it’s still October 2nd somewhere in the world.
So, for day two, I once again go with a fandom character, and that is the Hauler, the Cruller, the Crawler, Koichi Haimawari!! He’s the protagonist of the My Hero Academia: Vigilantes manga. He is a sweetheart and honestly has the most friend energy of any good manga boy. Dumbass, absolutely no brain friend energy, but friend energy nonetheless.
This is also your daily reminder/threat to read the Vigilantes manga, or else.
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I have a finished book of poems just lying around in my Google Docs because I'm a dumbass that can't promote her own self even if it means that my four weekends spent purely collecting my old poems and pretending to be a graphic designer will go unappreciated.
Like, it's so exhausting to promote your work nowadays — you need to be really good for your work to promote you without any effort on your side and I know that it's not that groundbreaking and my chronic anxiety would probably run me over after two days of trying to jump onto the capitalist wagon of advertisement and fake perfection.
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dactylicreveries · 1 year
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tsuna-mayos · 1 year
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mha e41 “kota”
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Ok here me out there should be a villian called the manipulator but thats only the name he doesn't manipulate he manipulates people by manipulating them into thinking hes the manipulator but in reality hes only the simple manipulator
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youremy-celebrity · 1 year
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fbi open up // my hero academia (social media au) [completed]
amongst search histories and private youtube videos
bakugo katsuki x fem!reader
genre: university/college au, fluff, crack, angst
warnings: swearing, sexual themes, adult stuff in general, jokes about dying, bakugo, slow burn, violence
disc: all pictures i used were found on pinterest and belong to their respective artists! i’ve only watermarked edits i’ve made!
taglist closed! thank you for your interest, reblogs are appreciated! <3
part one: todoroki shoto step on me
part two: squash me with your biceps
part three: this isn't about you anymore
part four: you can't threaten me with a good time
part five: we don't ice our drinks like pussies
part six: say sike rn
part seven: they're not so nice anymore
part eight: i'll do anything for a spicy man
part nine: payback for puking on my shoes
part ten: teasing AND threatening
part eleven: i'll cut you
part twelve: how is he hotter when i'm sober
part thirteen: like some eboy
part fourteen: i don't really care if you're into turtle porn
part fifteen: "what i want shinsou hitoshi for"
part sixteen: bakugo this is not a drill
part seventeen: everybody press the red button
part eighteen: please put the baby aside
part nineteen: you're a menace to society, cupcake
part twenty: i haven't invited you yet babe
part twenty-one: oh
part twenty-two: you don't mean anything to me
part twenty-three: can't a girl crave some ramen
part twenty-four: being a bitch for bitch's sake
part twenty-five: hiding in your room like pussies
part twenty-six: what, no cupcake?
part twenty-seven: i'll break all your teeth
part twenty-eight: i’m not whipped
part twenty-nine: it’s not very baby of you
part thirty: be my girlfriend
part thirty-one: who do you want?
part thirty-two: he says he doesn’t care
part thirty-three: a knife in my bedside drawer
part thirty-four: bubbly fun wheat juice
part thirty-five: can't cut carrots for shit though
part thirty-six: i'm going on a bird hunt
part thirty-seven: get in line bakuhoe (written)
part thirty-eight: don't be the dumbass now, love
part thirty-nine: i think my boyfriend's been kidnapped
bonus part forty: love you too babe
afterword
thanks for reading!
main masterlist
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dumbassacademia · 7 months
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Every few months or so I remember that the poem The Highwayman (by alfred noyes) exists and then I’m feral for a little bit and just generally Not Okay for like
At least a day or two
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