#dunlap writes shit

[waynedunlaptheorgandonor]

look, i updated "an unfinished memory"! read it here

i usually have a drawing accompanying this, but it's been so long since i've practiced drawing that i decided not to embarrass myself, plus i'm dying to share this story with y'all. if you still read this fic, may the lord bestow great blessings upon you. i will hopefully update it much more frequently than once every two years

#caryl #caryl fic #an unfinished memory #dunlap writes shit #can you believe it? #two wips updated in two weeks #it's magic #anyway have fun

[goosemixtapes]

max's favorite short stories & articles!

to be updated as i read new things! "articles" could be anything from political points to philosophical musings to fascinating stories. obligatory statement that i don't necessarily agree with everything in every one of these stories/articles, but i think about them a lot and want to share :)

short stories

Avi Cantor Has Six Months To Live by Sacha Lamb (@kuttithevangu) (novella) (so says the writing on the bathroom mirror. of gender & judaism & magic and t4t trans guys. cw for suicidal ideation and bullying)

Epistolary by Sascha Lamb ("The [stuffed] frog you are selling on your blog is MINE and he is NOT HAUNTED and his name is MOSHE not BILLY HOPPER.")

Chokechain by Andrew Joseph White (a trans man discovers his parents have replaced him with a robot version of his pretransition self. cw for transphobia and violence)

Sandrine by Alexandra Munck (the tagline for this one is "I dated a sun god in college" but that doesn't do justice to the sheer concept here please read this)

The Traveler Wife by yves. @yvesdot (an astronaut writes to the wife she left back home)

You Wouldn't Have Known About Me by Calvin Gimpelevich (set in a hospital ward where patients are recovering from gender-confirming surgery)

No Flight Without the Shatter by Brooke Bolander (novella) ("After the world’s end, the last young human learns a final lesson from Earth’s remaining animals." cw for climate change/extinction)

And You Shall Know Her By The Trail Of Dead by Brooke Bolander (what if you had to death-match-fight a virtual version of yourself at your meanest made by your boyfriend whose life you're trying to save would that be fucked up or what. cws for guns and violence)

Hell is the Absence of God by Ted Chiang (stories that clock you in the fucking teeth in the religious trauma.)

A Serpent for Each Year by Tamara Jerée (microfiction) ("Our relationship is almost a year old when I ask Nal why she is covered in snakes." cw for animal death)

The Front Line by W.C. Dunlap (microfiction) (cited as one of the world's finest attention-grabber openings. cws for police brutality, racism, and SA)

Welcome to Your Authentic Indian Experience by Rebecca Roanhorse (step into the simulation and gain an authentic experience! cws for anti-Native racism and alcohol)

articles & essays

Lockhart's Lament (on how math is taught in schools. that is, badly. one of the most cathartic essays i've ever read on education)

Against Cop Shit by Jeffrey Moro (on adversarial education)

I Am A Transwoman. I Am In The Closet. I Am Not Coming Out. by Jennifer Coates (do you have to be out to be a woman? cw for transphobia, homophobia, and eating disorders)

Debunking "Trans Women Are Not Women" Arguments by Julia Serano (comprehensive, well-written, good to have as a reference point)

On Liking Women by Andrea Long Chu (and on the politics of desire)

Turning a Unicorn Into a Bat by Josh and Lolly Weed (on Mormonism, love, and whether a gay man and a straight woman can marry happily. cw for homophobia)

Laziness Does Not Exist by Devon Price (musings on motivation from a social psychologist and professor)

How Millennials Became the Burnout Generation by Anne Helen Peterson (how come everything happens so much?)

White Women Drive Me Crazy by Aisha Mirza (on the harm caused by white women. cw for racism)

Everything You Know About Obesity Is Wrong by Michael Hobbes (should be required reading for everyone at this point. cw for fatphobia and eating disorders)

Becoming Anne Frank by Dara Horn (on the cultural fascination with Anne Frank. cw for antisemitism)

The Ecstasy of Influence by Jonathan Lethem ([on/a] plagiarism)

On the Ethics of Boinking Animal People by Patricia Taxxon (video essay) (ostensibly what the title says, but actually a detailed musing on the essential properties of furry media and the freedom of dehumanization; changed my life a bit)

#max.txt #yayayayayay :) #i've decided i'm going to start doing the 'what i read this month' thing #so this is like #my base to come backt o and update when i find new favorites #readings

[bisluthq]

Obviously Taylor has dated her fair share of people (which there should be no shame in), but based on her lyrics these are the relationships that seemed to be the most meaningful to her:

1. Drew Dunlap AKA 1st Boyfriend AKA Mr. Tim McGraw/Our Song/Fifteen (kinda)/Midnight Rain (probably) and a bunch of others

Was (in her mind) her first boyfriend!

Had her first kiss, first date, and first.. whatever else with

Mentions in multiple songs that she thought she was gonna/wanted to marry him

Based on Midnight Rain he seems to represent the idea of what could've been if she hadn't pursued a music career (or I guess succeeded in having a music career, since if she hadn't wanted to be a musician she wouldn't have moved to Nashville)

Has always described him as being super nice

Dated him for like a year

2. Joe Jonas AKA Disney's Resident Virginal Fuckboi AKA Mr. Perfectly Fine (and like SO many others)

In all her songs about him she says that she thought they were gonna be together forever because he... told her that they were gonna be together forever

Was clearly VERY hurt by the whole Joe thing. Back in the day she said it was her first true heartbreak (though it obviously paled in comparison to what was to come)

Did not get over it for a WHILE (6 months gone and I'm still reaching... Etc)

She also referred to him as her first love in the original Speak Now album booklet which I don't think was entirely accurate but girlie was trying to tell a story

"he will try to take away my pain, and he just might make me smile but the whole time I'm wishing he was you instead"

3. John Mayer AKA Sleazy Douchebag AKA Mr. Dear John (and co)

She has SO many lyrics about how she just loved. Him. So. Damn. Much (also this is outside of a musical context but she also said she loved him in interviews so..)

For better or for worse (definitely worse) it had a VERY big impact on her

Threw all logic out the window in the relationship and chose to actively ignore every red flag, or better yet turn them into little quirks (for example: the 2nd verse of Superman)

"don't forget where I'll be. Right here wishing the flowers were from you, wishing the card was from you, wishing the call was from you" (poor TL)

Wrote "I'd tell you I miss you but I don't know how/I'd lay my armour down if you'd say you'd rather love than fight" AFTER writing dear john

"I used to think one day we'd tell the story of us, how we met and the Sparks flew instantly"

4. Jake Gyllenhaal AKA Indie Douchebag AKA Mr. All Too Well (and basically all of Red, and honestly also probably elements of 1989)

Fell HARD and FAST

Was like *romantic?

Kept crawling his way back

Kept letting him crawl his way back

Wrote (in her own words) an entire album about it

"I never saw you coming and I'll never be the same"

"you're my Achilles heel"

Literally redefined her perception of love

Taylor at TIFF when talking about All Too Well "I don't see myself continuing to make stuff about extreme guttural heartbreak at your most formative age, that debilitates you emotionally for years, and you have to develop a scar tissue to move on with your life, and write a novel about, cause you're still..." (also it is things like this that make me mildly concerned about the fact that she's never gone to therapy)

We're meeting each other's families within less than 3 months (which I know is a Jake staple but still, Jesus)

"I used to think that we were forever and I used to say never say never"

5. Harry Styles AKA Teenage Boy who can't keep it in his pants (who would've thought???) AKA Mr. Out Of The Woods (and like others but DEFINITELY that one)

Knew it wasn't going to last but still seemed to enjoy it while it lasted

Put up with all that fangirl shit

Seemed to find it inspirational, if only aesthetically

Only person on this list that she seemingly didn't think she would end up with (though she apparently thought he may interrupt her wedding???)

We're apparently on-and-off for ages

Was a key player in sending her into one of many Identity Crisis'

6. Joe Alwyn AKA Golden Boy AKA Mr. 50-something songs (or something like that)

Was with him for 6 years

Very clearly thought he was the love of her life

Once again redefined her perception of love ("I once believed love would be burning red but it's golden" which I know is like a general concept but she applies red to Jake and gold to Joe for the most part)

I really don't think I should have to explain this one. She literally did it herself

Obviously we can't know for sure, but let me know if you agree or disagree. (Also sorry this is so long. I have a lot of thoughts and I don't know where else to put them xx)

I think you’re missing Calvin. I don’t like Calvin erasure lol. I know she didn’t write much about it and I think that’s where the idea that it wasn’t significant stems from but like I think that was a far more defining relationship than like Haylor tbh. He was the first boyfriend she lived with. I think there were very serious plans in place for them. It just started to suck at the end. But I think if he sucked just slightly less and if that time period sucked slightly less, she’d have married him tbh. She’s referring to him as the “good husband” in songs so like… she did think that was very serious. I also think that’s sorta why there weren’t that many songs. It was all just fine and then it sucked and none of it was crazy inspiring but it was also obviously super deep.

[dayinity]

introduction <3

hey i’m jaycee and i’m new to tumblr. i just started writing. i will list my boundaries down here 🤍

fandoms i write abt:

avatar 2009 and twow

jake sully

neytiri

ronal

tonowari

tsireya

ao’nung

lo’ak

kiri

tuktirey (platonically)

roxto

ao’nung’s friends

norm

trudy

tsu’tey

grace

miles quaritch

you’re welcome to request any characters i haven’t listed if you’d like :)

stranger things

eleven

mike

will

lucas

dustin

erica (platonically)

nancy

steve

eddie (no smut bc i hate this man)

billy

robin

joyce

mrs. wheeler

hopper

enzo

yuri

the boys:

homelander

billy butcher

hughie campbell

annie january (starlight)

earving (black noir)

marvin milk (mothers milk/m.m)

serge (frenchie)

kimiko (the female)

reginald franklin (a-train)

ryan butcher (platonically)

gen v

marie moreau

luke riordan

sam riordan

cate dunlap

andre anderson

emma meyer

jordan li

suicide squad

harley quinn

rick flag

bloodsport

deadshot

killer croc

captain boomerang

ratcatcher 2

peacemaker

el diablo

king shark

—

i will do smut, angst, & fluff. i will not do smut for minors or disgusting matters. the farthest i will go for teens is a kiss or making out. i won’t do pedophilia, incest, or any of that shit. please be specific with requests, and if i haven’t listed characters or fandoms, feel welcome to ask about them. 🫶🏽

#introductory post #random post

[otthonzulles]

MC Mack x Al Kapone - Run yo mouth ('My last underground tape' / 1997)

Igazi Memphis finomság. Beateket felismerem csomó phonkból, nem véletlen. És mindig jó elmerülni ezeknek a szövegében is. Az "M-11" egy géppisztoly-típus, a 211 meg a rablás rendőrségi kódja. Hol lennék urbandictionary nélkül honestly.

[Intro: Kingpin Skinny Pimp & Koopsta Knicca] Run yo mouth, run yo mouth, run yo mouth, run yo mouth For ya niggas, for ya niggas, for ya niggas with some anna Run yo mouth, run yo mouth, run yo mouth, run yo mouth For ya niggas with some anna, I got a nine that you can handle

[Chorus: Kingpin Skinny Pimp & Koopsta Knicca] Run yo mouth, talk that shit, M-11, 211 For ya niggas with some anna, I got a nine that you can handle Run yo mouth, talk that shit, M-11, 211 For ya niggas with some anna, I got a nine that you can handle Run yo mouth, talk that shit, M-11, 211 For ya niggas with some anna, I got a nine that you can handle Run yo mouth, talk that shit, M-11, 211 For ya niggas with some anna, I got a nine that you can handle

[Verse 1: Al Kapone] Loced out, smoked out, like the Triple Six clique My mind has turned lunatic, ain't barin' none of this bullshit So drop it off ya ass, before I turn to Cypress Hill "Insane in the Brain", so deadbeats I kill at will I told you mothafuckaz that the streets ain't nothin' but a death trap Now they wanna lock a young nigga on Poplar and Dunlap, but mothafuck that Got my gat, ready to spray, bitch my name ain't O.J Trail me to my house and I'mma blow ya ass away! Tryna treat a nigga like a hunted animal So anything goes, now watch a nigga get scandalous hoe Shoot you right between yo' eyes, execution style Then take yo blood, write my name on the wall, murderous Scarface Al Kapone, spell it with a "K", for "killa" Releasin' 400 years of oppression every time I squeeze the fuckin' trigger It's do or die, and I'm ready to go to war Just like Tony Montana, bitch, so what the fuck you waitin' for?

[Chorus: Kingpin Skinny Pimp & Koopsta Knicca] Run yo mouth, talk that shit, M-11, 211 For ya niggas with some anna, I got a nine that you can handle Run yo mouth, talk that shit, M-11, 211 For ya niggas with some anna, I got a nine that you can handle Run yo mouth, talk that shit, M-11, 211 For ya niggas with some anna, I got a nine that you can handle Run yo mouth, talk that shit, M-11, 211 For ya niggas with some anna, I got a nine that you can handle

[Verse 2: M.C. Mack] Now it's the Mack up on this shit, I'm talkin' about you bustaz runnin' lip You poppin' game of lemon-lame, watermelons make me click You actin' like you down but when I come around yo' ass ain't down Run yo mouth just like a hoe, Mack don't even chief his dope With niggas like yo sissy-kind, bitch you ain't my fuckin' friend Nine bustas out of ten are dead, can't you comprehend? Hoppin' in the Jetta with them gold McLeans, with my thang On the seat, J-ass fools are starin' but they can't compete These niggas is flaugin' and fakin', they traitin' I told don't be havin' no feelings, just anotha leaf the Mack is rakin' North Memphis niggas, South Memphis niggas stay about our Honeycomb Cracka jack, watch yo back, trick we see you doin' wrong Hanging with us playaz, silly busta you'll get yo cranium cracked M.C. Mack is a pimpin' mack! Put that yalk thang to his back Brothers like the Macksta nigga always in the midst of a scandal Lay it down turn around, trick Mack got some you can handle

[Chorus: Kingpin Skinny Pimp & Koopsta Knicca] Run yo mouth, talk that shit, M-11, 211 For ya niggas with some anna, I got a nine that you can handle Run yo mouth, talk that shit, M-11, 211 For ya niggas with some anna, I got a nine that you can handle Run yo mouth, talk that shit, M-11, 211 For ya niggas with some anna, I got a nine that you can handle Run yo mouth, talk that shit, M-11, 211 For-for ya niggas with some anna, I got a nine that you can handle

#memphis #gansta rap #triple six #triple six mafia #kingpin skinny pimp #koopsta knicca #mc mack #al kapone #memphis rap #poplar and dunlap #SoundCloud

[queen-eevee]

12 14 24?

12. favorite character to write about this year

Answered here but my secret 3rd answer is Landry. Love that funky violence guy he's a joy to write

14. a fic you didn’t expect to write

Being completely honest: all of them lmao. Every fic I've published to AO3 this year was a complete spur-of-the-moment, holy-shit-how-did-I-write-this-in-a-day ordeal. Hiroto fic is probably the one I least expected though. That one was not even meant to be finished in a night, let alone published !

24. favorite fic you read this year

I refuse to pick one here's another list:

your unforecasted. emotion of season 9 elections.......I reread this the other day and it still slaps just as hard this fic rules hen

also GHOST PHONE. hen I love ghost phone so much every time I remember this fic I laugh to myself

everything Hayden (waveridden) has been kind enough to gift to me this year because ve's an angel, but I've been thinking about when am I gonna lose you a lot lately (Famous' glasses.....)

Also proof of life still makes me so wistful and weepy every time I read it, hayden went Off with this one

Tam's (marquis) distance to measure out has just made a home in my brain I love Lottie and Famous' relationship so much

Also legally I have to mention the long way down, this fic holds such an important place in my heart. Tam's tigers my Beloveds

I adored Closing Act by AParticularlyLargeBear, a fic about Dunlap's feedback to the firefighters. Completely revamped the way I thought about the pitcher feedback glitches

Marn's (baliset) you are a tourist with Mike and Derrick. LOVE a road trip fic, LOVE experiencing emotions along the way

Impernia's you're at the party (you're not invited). Woof....emotion of getting married for tax benefits, emotion of the Hell of an expansion era the garages had......

Send me some end-of-the-year fanfic asks!

#thank you lee my beloved!!! #there are so many more fics I could list but I am limiting myself to this #I feel like a sham for not adding push my voice to hear it stall but hayden has probably heard me yell about it enough lmaoo #anyway. go read my friends' fics they're all wonderful #answered

[jirnkirks]

Helloooo I am now incoherently screaming about Hiroto and Famous. can please get uhhh 6, 19, 20, 21, 24, and uhh 33 for the blaseball asks? <3

ARENT WE ALL FCVK god i think abt them contstantly its terminal

send me a number from this post!

6. storyline you keep coming back to again and again (e.g. mike townsend arc, jaylen hotdogfingers’ resurrection, snackrifice, tillman henderson’s return)

i dont know if this fully counts, like i wasnt here for a lot of the TDE stuff but i think the biggest is maybe aldon's vaulting and our lore of vis replicas?? OH also god famous.... famous pitched our first death way back in s3, and they pitched our first ambush, our first return. they pitched the gods spitting on us and incinerating plums in front of us. famous goddamn owens, here for death, here for undeath, smiling through it all.

19. a headcanon somebody else convinced you of

hmm this is hard.... BLASEBALL IS ALL HEADCANON... i think the biggest thing is lit...everything abt moody cookbook moody my beloody.... moody living on, in part, as part of the storm that is landry violence, living on in hiroto's earring, in a stone dunlap owns, in fish, in meng. bits and pieces and not quite complete, but still they live. still they watch. not even waiting for their own return, no, that's too selfish. and yet we came anyway. (hello moody)

20. stupid character lore concept that lives in your head rent free

where does rigby fall on this... like hesa a cute lil goldfish who's trapped in a cube of water, has 28 fuckign stars and killed poseidon. rigby friedrich, godkiller, tired, unrepentant. cute lil goldfish.

if not... im not sure bcus if u mean stupid as in rly silly theres not so many because i like crying LMAO oh im planning to submit an irm where famous is just a bitch ass raccoon who keeps showing up to games (already on wiki) and lottie the name of this tiny baby racoon who started showing after famous came back after a long disappearance. no one knows where they come from but famous is protective of lottie despite lottie constantly biting people and running around and fucking shit up. its very cute! and very dumb! i think lottie should be allowed a lil irm nonsense, as a treat.

21. really good character lore concept that lives in your head rent free

OH FUCK shit shiiit okay. i automatically am a lil soft for anything thats a being bigger than this existence folding itself up for or because of blaseball- moody, ren, my hc lottie, kinda landry are def part of this. oh gloria bugsnax, esp this fic on ao3? absolutely one of my favorite things. im also obssessed with nicholas mora, the stars and his little froggy son and how he unobtrusively plays a part in the way the stars have unfolded, not due to power or ability, but because he knows this story already and yet here he is, trapped like a fucking pleb like the rest of us

also i like carcinization

24. what’s the most Hiatus Brain thing you’ve done so far this siesta?

idk if this counts but ive been making a truly godawful amount of blaseball art this past couple of weeks. its fucking ridicoulous. i wANT TO WRITE THOUGH

33. favorite aspect of blaseball

ngl i think this is an old thing, but creatively, i greatly enjoy having a very loose canon to play with- i need to consume media to get into it, but i have so much freedom to play w appearances and nuances its a lot of fun. i think coming together to brainrot together is quite fun, and a close second is like...fucking w this splort as a sport with other fans

#majestic-salad #ask

[96thdayofrage]

Just a theory: the Pan-Africanists who hate #ADOS don’t hate #ADOS because of the latter people’s actual politics. Pan-Africanists hate #ADOS because the people who are involved in that movement are pointing out something that no one else will: that Pan-Africanism in 2021 feels like a response to a question that basically no one really even asks anymore. That for all of their grand pronouncements—the epic and almost mythic sense of their project’s historical certainty—it’s becoming harder and harder to ignore how Pan-Africanism today just sort of feels in a lot of ways like the soggy nub of a joint being passed around at a dwindling party.

Think about it. Does the strangely visceral opinion about #ADOS held and oft expressed by Pan-Africanists really spring from the former’s politics? Yeah? Really? Well, what is it about the #ADOS political agenda specifically that they so hate? Is it that they would like the U.S. government to continue holding onto the trillions of dollars that it owes these people? Is it that they approve of chemical plants and refineries and waste dumps being strewn throughout black American communities in such a way that basically ensures those residents—simply by going outside and inhaling oxygen—contract what are 100% lethal diseases?

Or is it more likely that these people feel somewhere deep down that ADOS are like some kind of apparently lower form of oppressed subjects? And that, as such, they simply aren’t entitled to (or even capable of?) determining their own fate. Is it that they feel ADOS are being insubordinate and unmanageable and refractory and childish? Is it that in their assertion of agency and in their unsparing critique of the international movement that has patently failed them ADOS are hurting the feelings of many people who are—let’s be honest—way too emotionally overinvested in what’s mostly become just a quaint area of scholarship in our universities’ Africana Studies departments?

Just a theory! But doesn’t that seem like maybe a more honest answer?

Maybe those Pan-Africanists just hate that #ADOS has been quite successful in its reparations advocacy despite the movement’s refusal to conform to Pan-Africanist orthodoxy. And maybe it’s that these Pan Africanists have a faint notion that wounded pride isn’t exactly a sophisticated reason to critique #ADOS, so they instead invent some bullshit political pretext about how #ADOS’s advocacy is ‘ahistorical’ or totally reactionary or that those in the movement are corrupted by a strain of American exceptionalism or whatever.

That, anyway, is the basic defensive crouch position from which Broderick Dunlap writes his recent article, “A Dose of Reality for the ADOS Movement”. Adhering tightly to what is now the standard formula for a Pan-Africanist-Critique-of-the-#ADOS-Movement think piece, Dunlap’s essay is deeply fucking boring, stiff, and backward-gazing. It is obsessed with identifying earlier modalities and pointing out the completely obvious fact that #ADOS’s approach does not correspond with them (which, given the failure of those forms of identity and resistance to offer a bulwark against something as basic as inadequate sewage treatment, let alone unify an entire continent, well, duh!). But mostly Dunlap’s essay just aims to persuade the reader that reparations isn’t about money; that the real and most vital question that black people in America need to consider (black people who are forced to live under regularly occurring boil water advisories, mind you!)—is: “what will it take for Black folks to forgive the United States?”

It is true that, in the #ADOS political literature, this inquiry into the capacity of black people to forgive their victimizer is never raised. It also seems true that it is difficult to imagine a less radical and more insulting position than that, but, anyway, I digress. Thirdly, the suggestion that the only thing that #ADOS is concerned about is a simple transaction of overdue funds—after which they just sort of dust off their hands and raise a glass to victory while beginning to contemplate their new investment portfolios—is totally absurd, very easily disproven, and yet another example of the strong tendency among Pan-Africanists to feel that it is their right to define the #ADOS movement however they like.

But if the demand for monetary compensation to be paid to their group is what makes #ADOS a supposedly purely avaricious movement—if that is why they must be vilified and opposed and viewed as a blasphemous and debauched form of a black liberation movement—then what is one to make of similar demands for material redress made throughout the diaspora directly to that nation’s former colonizer? Here’s one such example involving Barbados’s demand for the United Kingdom to pay it reparations. Or when Hilary Beckles, chairman of CARICOM’s reparations commission explains that the organization of Caribbean member states is “focusing [our reparations claim] on Britain because Britain…made the most money out of slavery and the slave trade – they got the lion’s share,” where is the prolonged outrage from the Pan-Africanists who would otherwise decry the omission of other diasporic groups from this one-nation-in-the-crosshairs look at who owes who what? Why don’t the people making the argument for those reparations get accused of merely wanting “crumbs” from the old imperialistic British pie or whatever? Again, we are asked to believe that the Pan-Africanist antipathy toward #ADOS is rooted in a fundamental political disagreement, or like some inviolable set of internationalistic beliefs. But when demands that are analogous to those of #ADOS receive effectively none of the hostility and outright disdain that the #ADOS’s demand for reparations appears to singularly attract from the rest of the diaspora, it sure becomes hard not to see a more cynical motivation at the core of the their ‘critique’ of the movement’s political aims.

Here’s what I think: I think that the refrain of reparations not being about money is a slogan that is 100% designed to sheepdog would-be serious reparations advocates into supporting business as usual forever here in America. I think once you say something like that you have been brought right into the Democratic Party’s orbit and the DNC will make short work of turning your little proclamation of righteousness and purity or whatever the fuck it is into a feel-good campaign of money-free ‘justice.’ I think the accusation that monetary reparations for ADOS are viewed by that group not as the seeds to self-determination but rather as the harvest itself is a lie concieved in malice and spite—that it is a mischaracterization that strives to bastardize a project that has only ever argued the need for a significant restructuring of the (highly group-specific!) maldistribution of wealth in America before their group could ever meaningfully participate in any kind of internationalism. But what I really can’t account for though is why ADOS saying that activates some serious lizard brain shit in a whole lot of people. Or why those people apparently feel the need to gussy up that brute emotional response in some bogus political principle that they can’t really criticize without hypocrisy: it is OK for CARICOM to explicitly exclude ADOS from their reparations claim against imperial powers (and merely refer them to another organization trying to make additional pecuniary arrangements for Caribbeans), but it is a cause for moral outrage when #ADOS tries to take their group’s case to the U.S. government? I don’t know. That sort of unevenness of application strikes me as people who are motivated way less by actual ideas and more by the people themselves who are doing what they’re doing. And what are ADOS even doing that’s so totally unconscionable anyway? Turning to one another and becoming passionately invested in their shared experience instead of performing a committment to something that is no longer really a relevant force in the world but which will get them meaningless approval by lots of strangers? Again, I don’t know. It just seems like a lot of the time that what governs opinion about #ADOS involves a lot more high school lunchroom behavior than what those people would like us to believe.

[nodynasty4us]

Ok, so I've actually sat down and read the entire 29 page Mueller indictment against the 12 Russian intelligence officers

By James Dunlap on Facebook, posted July 13, 2018.

Ok, so I've actually sat down and read the entire 29 page Mueller indictment against the 12 Russian intelligence officers, and it is totally insane.  I literally can't believe the scope of this thing.  I'm making this status public (i.e., shareable), because people need to know about this shit.  There is no way you can read the actual indictment and not conclude that 1) there WAS a RUSSIAN conspiracy, 2) that the scope of that conspiracy was GARGANTUAN, 3) that it was organized BY THE RUSSIAN GOVERNMENT [i.e., there's no way Putin didn't know about this], 4) That people connected to the Trump campaign [and, shockingly, other U.S. Gov't officials] WERE INVOLVED, and 5) this is just the beginning.  If Mueller has already uncovered this amount of information with such specificity regarding the goings-on in far-away Russia, there's NO WAY some serious shit isn't going to hit the fan going forward right here in the U.S.

So, without further ado, here are the highlights:

Article 1 of the indictment states that the Russian government actively set up multiple intelligence units (known as the GRU) with the sole aim of interfering with the 2016 election.  Two of these units, 26165, and 74455, were specifically tasked with acquiring and releasing stolen documents via hacking.  

Article 2 specifically calls this a "conspiracy" and states that the 12 indicted Russians had contacts with "persons known and unknown to the Grand Jury."

Article 3:  The aforementioned Russian intelligence units deliberately targeted the Clinton campaign.

Article 4:  They deliberately targeted the DNC as a whole.

Article 6:  In June of 2016, they released TENS OF THOUSANDS of hacked documents using fictitious online personas.

Article 10:  One of the intelligence officers, Boris Antonov, oversaw a department within 26165 tasked with hacking the U.S. military, governmental (i.e., political) and non-governmental organizations.   [i.e., they were spying on every level of our gov't].

Articles 12-18:  The Russian hackers often used various online aliases, both male and female, such as (but not limited to) "Kate Milton," "James McMorgans," and "Karen Millen."  Sergey Morgachev, another Russian hacker, was a Lt. Colonel in the Russian military.  He created the hacking malware used by dept. 26165, known as "X-Agent."  Another hacker named in the indictment, Nikolay Kozachek, was a Lt. Captain in the Russian military.  Artem Malyshev (also named in the indictment) was a Second Lieutenant in the Russian military.  Aleksandr Osadchuk (also named in the indictment) is a Colonel in the Russian Military.  He oversaw the creation and dissemination of anti-Clinton material online.

Article 19:  Russian Military Officer Aleksey Potemkin, assigned to 74455, supervised the creation of fake social media accounts used (among other things) in the release of DNC documents.

Article 21:  Over 300 individuals affiliated with the DNC were SUCCESSFULLY targeted.  (Article 21 is lengthy, and includes a detailed, play-by-play account of how 26165 and 74455 achieved their aims.   Spoiler alert:  It's crazy).

Article 24, subsection B:  The Russian's hacking of the DNC was so advanced that they were able to monitor individual computers in real time.  Subsection C states that their malware sent actual screenshots of DNC computer activity to a server in Arizona that the Russians had access to.  They were also able to capture keystrokes entered by DCCC employees.

Article 24, subsection D:  They monitored individual DNC / DCCC employees for hours on end, and obtained information about DNC fundraising plans and even banking information (as well as other personal information).

Article 26 subsection A:  By June 2016 the Russians had complete access to 33 DNC computers, totally and completely.

Article 27:  The GRU gained access to information regarding DNC opposition research, field operation plans, and the Benghazi operation.

Article 28, subsection B:  Aside from the server in Arizona, the GRU also stored data to a server in Illinois, to which they filtered large gigabytes of stolen information via a program they developed known as "X-Tunnel."

Article 32:  The DNC became aware of Russian attempts to hack their servers and hired a security firm to identify the extent of the intrusions.  The security firm (identified in the indictment only as "company 1") also put in place measures to halt GRU access to DNC computers, but, despite this, the GRU was so efficient that they continued to maintain access via "X-Agent" well through October of 2016.  

Article 33:  The GRU immediately became aware of "company 1's" (referring here to the security firm that the DNC hired) efforts, and took countermeasures in response.  This included investigating / hacking "company 1" itself, and later, apparently as a retaliatory measure against the DNC, setting up a wesbsite that redirected from a DNC online political donations website, to another website set up by the GRU (in other words, the GRU took funds from DNC donors, using the pretext of a false DNC donations website).  

Articles 35-36:  The GRU set up another website, the sole purpose of which was to release stolen DNC documents.  They created fake social media accounts that falsely attributed this website's creation to a group of "American hacktivists."  It received over 1 million hits.

Article 37:  The GRU has also released stolen documents dating back to 2015 (i.e., they've been up to this for quite a while).

Article 40:  The notion of a "lone Romanian hacker" being responsible for the DNC leaks was a fiction deliberately created by the GRU and disseminated via fake social media accounts.

Article 42:  Using a popular blogging site, the GRU set up a blog that used the most "searched for" keywords by conspiracy theorists, (e.g., "Illuminati," "Worldwide," "Conspiracy," et. al.), -and used this website to further disseminate the "lone Romanian hacker" conspiracy theory.  (Article 46 of the indictment further states that later entries on this blog site posted articles positing that the released, stolen documents had "nothing to do with Russia.")  

Article 43, Subsection A:  An individual the indictment identifies only as "a known member of congress" contacted an online GRU dummy persona, ("Guccifer 2.0") and requested stolen documents related to their political opponent, and the GRU / "Guccifer" responded by giving said member of congress access to the stolen data they were requesting.

Article 43, Subsection B:   The GRU released stolen documents to what the indictment identifies as "a lobbyist and online source of political news."  

Subsection C:  "Guccifer" / The GRU sent stolen documents pertaining to the "Black Lives Matter" movement to a reporter (unidentified in the indictment), to which the reporter not only responded, but offered to write an article using said information.

Article 44:  The GRU, posing as "Guccifer 2.0" wrote to a person who was in regular contact with SENIOR MEMBERS OF THE TRUMP CAMPAIGN.  (The indictment includes direct quotes of their online conversation, and this is CLEARLY referring to Roger Stone).

Article 45, subsection B:  The GRU, using an alias, contacted a U.S. reporter (unnamed in the indictment) and ultimately gave them access to stolen DNC data.  

Articles 47-49:  Here the indictment refers to an organization, identified only as "Organization 1," [I'm thinking, Wikileaks] -which actually reached out to the GRU aliases seeking the stolen emails / data.  "Organization 1" is directly quoted by the indictment as having communicated to "Guccifer," that they should "send [Organization 1] any new material [i.e., stolen data] here for us to review and it will have a much higher impact than what you are doing."  Organization 1 was given, and later released, said data, approximately 3 days before the Democratic National Convention.  In total, between October and November of 2016, over 50,000 stolen documents were released.

Articles 50-79 : Lists the counts against the 11 Russian Military Personnel, which include charges of 1) Conspiracy to Commit Offenses Against The United States, 2) Aggravated Identity Theft, 3)  Conspiracy to Launder Money [according to the indictment, over 95,000 USD$ was laundered], i.e. using cryptocurrency, that was then use to register domain names, set up websites, create server infrastructure, et. al.,3) The Use of Transferred Money To Commit Crimes Against The United States, 4) General Unlawful Conspiracy [It should be noted that many of these counts have sub-crimes attached to them, such as unlawful hacking, etc.].    

So, there it is folks.  This WAS A RUSSIAN CONSPIRACY, massive in scope, directly linked to the Trump campaign, the sole aim of which was to subvert Democracy. There is no way around it.

#russia #donald trump #robert mueller

[waynedunlaptheorgandonor]

i have been Swamped with full-time freelance writing and a full-time job on top of it, and you guys have been so so so patient with me going months and months and months without updating anything, so i decided to give you little sneak-peeks at the next “diy steps to serenity” and “an unfinished memory” chapters to prove to you that i do actually have content, it’s just been sitting idle as i’ve been forced to write less-fun things for money :( 

i’m going to have a break in my work writing obligations here v v v soon, and updating these fics will be my vacation before the next obligations begin, and i am extremely hype 

snippets under the cut:

DIY Steps to Serenity Excerpt:

The next thing she registered were forms being thrust at her, demanding her signature, as if she had any capacity to read. She mumbled the answers to questions about her birthdate and address, and scribbled her name poorly where they told her to on a tablet. Then, all of a sudden, a nurse was wiping the crook of her elbow down with an alcohol swab, and she forced herself out of her fog of suffering.

"No no no, wait," she said, trying to angle away. 

"They gotta give you an IV to put you under for surgery, baby," Daryl said, his fingers brushing her hair back off her forehead. Carol shook her head vehemently.

"I can't," she insisted, eyes wide with fear. 

"I know but you don't got a choice, honey, it'll be okay. Everythin's okay." Evidently, he'd regained his mantra from somewhere, but Carol still wasn't convinced.

"Don't worry, you won't feel a thing. We're going to push some Dilaudid through to help control the pain while we wait to take you back for anesthesia," Leopard Print Scrubs said, thinking that Carol's fear was with the surgery, and not with the small syringe of clear liquid that she was preparing to push directly into her veins. She looked to Daryl helplessly, who simply shook his head.

"You got no choice," he repeated. Through the pain and fright and flood of confusion, Carol tried to think of an alternative. What did they used to do before pain medication? Maybe they could get her some whiskey and a big rock to bite down on. Not ideal, but she was so close to her twelve-month chip, which she didn't realize until that moment was something she actually gave a shit about.

"I'm just gonna flush your IV with some saline, and then we'll get that medicine in you and get you feeling better, you poor thing," Leopard Print Scrubs said. With her free hand, Carol reached for Daryl. He took it without hesitation.

"I won't be sober," she whispered to him through tears that she wasn't sure were new or had been falling since she'd arrived.

"But you'll be alive."

//

An Unfinished Memory Excerpt:

“Come now, don’t be like that,” Merle said. He came around and sat next to Daryl on the couch. He smelled like cigarettes and the cheap perfume of whichever girl he’d been cozying up with at the bar the night before. “If you need help lookin’ like a fine, upstandin’ citizen then I’ll do my damndest, but first you gotta be straight with me.”

“Straight with you about what?” Daryl didn’t look at his brother, opting instead to fiddle with his drawing, which was now just a crinkly ball in his hands. Pity, he thought, he’d liked that one well enough to have kept it, if Merle hadn’t ruined it. Whatever, he could always just draw it again.

“Carol. What’s goin’ on between the two of you? And don’t come at me with that ‘we’re just friends’ bullshit.”

“Well we are, so I dunno what the fuck else you want me to say.”

“The truth. You know everyone who goes through the Roadhouse all call her your girl, and she ain’t never denied it.”

“You know that was just so them guys would stop puttin’ moves on her when she was just doin’ her damn job.”

“Yeah, but that was months ago. You’d think by now the truth woulda come out, but if anythin’, with the way you two cozy up with each other when you’re together at the diner, y’all only reinforce it.”

“Good, then they’ll keep leavin’ her be.” Daryl pointedly did not address the “cozy up” comment.

“You know that ain’t my point.”

“Then what is it?” Daryl knew he was being purposefully obtuse, and he knew Merle knew it too, but he refused to give his brother the satisfaction of dignifying his taunts with a response.

But then Merle said, “She’d be good for you, you know? A girl like her. If you was with her I’d support it. Hell, I’d more than support it. I’d be over the damn moon.”

Daryl let his hands still, the staticky crumpling sound of the paper finally ceasing. He tossed the ball onto the table and leaned back on the uncomfortable couch, the structure of the thing hitting him at all kinds of unpleasant angles where the cushion was worn away. He stared headlong at the television in front of him. It wasn’t on, but the alternative was looking at his brother, and he didn’t think he could say what he was about to say and meet another person’s eye at the same time.

He said, so quietly he could hardly hear it himself, “Maybe I would be, too.”

#diy steps to serenity #an unfinished memory #dunlap writes shit #and will finish shit soon too #promise #caryl #caryl fic #twd

[aftermidcightarchive]

welp. i decided i needed to change the fcs of a lot of my characters. so many of them are hardly ever use, and maybe this will prompt me to write them more. changes under the cut. tomorrow i’m going to re-do my theme and their pictures and shit, but i need sleep now.

waverly whose fc was eliza taylor is now bridget ‘birdie’ tamsin floyd with the fc of dove cameron. only her age has changed.

november whose fc was maia mitchell is now november ‘nova’ grace kessler with the fc of madison beer. only her age has changed.

emma whose fc was kat mcnamara is now florence ‘flo’ harriet gaffner with the fc of scarlett leithold. her age has changed and her bio was completely redone. 

lenore whose fc was adelaide kane is now lenore ‘lenny’ mae campbell with the fc of alexis ren. only her age has changed.

cynthia whose fc was emeraude toubia is now cynthia ‘cyn’ inez moreno with the fc of cindy kimberly. her age has changed and her bio was tweaked.

alaska, whose fc was phoebe tonkin, is now delaney ‘laney’ sage holloway with the fc of kat mcnamara. her age has changed and her bio was tweaked.

augustina, whose fc was lindsey morgan, is now arden ‘arjay’ jennine reynolds with the fc of kendall jenner. only her age has changed.

abrielle, whose fc was alycia debnam-carey, is now juniper ‘juni’ reagan wilkinson with the fc of lily james. only her age has changed.

leighton, whose fc was jennifer morrison, is now leighton ‘lady’ etta bradshaw with the fc of sophie bush. only her age has changed.

ireland, whose fc was kendall jenner, is now asha ‘ash’ rochelle watts with the fc of zendaya. her age has changed and her bio was tweaked.

joplin, whose fc was halsey is now kinsley  ‘kins’ roxanne turner with the fc of maggie lindemann. only her age has changed.

asha, whose fc was zendaya, is now joplin ‘jo’ marlowe price with the fc of halsey. only her age has changed.

roxanne, whose fc was lily collins, is now dottie ‘dot’ gillian mfcee with the fc of adelaide kane. only her age has changed.

atlas, whose fc was louis tomlinson, is now ezekiel 'zeke' calvin west with the fc of shawn mendes. his age has changed and his bio was tweaked.

santiago, whose fc was alberto rosende, is now atticus 'atty' waylan wilkerson with the fc of louis tomlinson. his age has changed and his bio was tweaked.

lysander, whose fc was sam claflin, is now lysander 'lee' tate dunlap with the fc of  charles melton. only his age has changed.

mateo, whose fc was bob morley, is now topher 'tj' joseph bradley with the fc of chris wood. only his age has changed.

cormac, whose fc was niall horan, is now archer 'archie' graham matthews with the fc of tom holland. only his age has changed.

ezekiel, whose fc was shawn mendes, is now cormac 'mac' eoin o’neill with the fc of niall horan. his age has changed and his bio was tweaked.

byron, whose fc was dylan o’brien, is now byron 'ronnie' paul finch with the fc of luke hemmings. only his age has changed.

colton, whose fc was daniel sharman, is now colton 'colt' sterling byers with the fc of ashton irwin. only his age has changed. 

#( & they told you i’m crazy { OOC } :;

[the-lads-last-rose]

off to college

"McKenna Dunlap My one true friend I wrote this on 8/23/17 - 4:45 am Sanity. McKenna tonight I shook hands with people I've spent more than 20% of my life with. I won't see them again for a long time probably. It got me thinking, especially because I said it to Mike, I told Mike, "Friday's the last day. See ya then pal." McKenna Friday is actually the last day. I won't be living right next door for a long time. Yeah I'll be here on the weekends but not all the time and your schedule might not even line up. After Friday that's it. McKenna I'm writing this now to tell you how much you mean to me. I have no connection to anyone else like I do with you. Thinking about writing this, and even right now, I'm in tears. It pains me so much to even think about not having you right next door. We don't even hang out so much anymore but it's the idea that really counts. McKenna you've kept me sane. You're the only person that's managed to unwrap my brain and really figure out how I think, everything you've said to me I've taken to heart and it's changed me for the better. I wouldn't drowned myself in my own thoughts if it were not for you. I'm really going to miss you so much, I don't think I even realize now how much I will. Life is going to be so different without you. One of the main reasons I'm writing this is because I have a couple things to ask/tell you. 1. I'm making you a promise, one I hope you can return. Every weekend I come back home, I'm going to tell you about. Every single free fucking day. Because if we could hang out even just once a month to catch up, that would be amazing. So please tell me your schedule for work and school because we will work around this shit I swear to god. 2. You are such a beautiful person. For the love of everything sweet in this world, please never change. It would be an incredible shame for people in your future to never meet to person I know now. A person so pure of heart. 3. Don't let time put itself in between us. I don't know what I would do if we lost touch. I don't know what I'd do if I lost you McKenna. So please, keep in touch. The world is a massive expanse. The sky, endless, with enough space to build every thought I could imagine. But doing so would send me into insanity. I don't have control, I float upwards into the expanse. But as I begin to float upwards, Something pulls me back down Every time. It's you. Thank you, for it all, every year we had, every moment, every late night every time we hung out. Every time we laughed, every time you've helped me out. For every time you kept me sane. Thank you. Marcus Peñate"

[grandebeauty]

Chapter 3!!! I arrived at school, and did my normal routine. I will be honest, I looked for Brandon around every corner. I knew that if I didn't run into him after breakfast, I would see him in fourth period. All of my classes were going by so slowly. Then finally third period was over. I rushed to my locker because I was hoping he would be standing there waiting like the day before, but he wasn't. For a second I had to pull myself together. "Nina what are you doing girl? ", I asked myself. I took a deep breath and headed to class. I walked inside and I made it a point not to even glance in Brandon's direction. I needed to play it cool, and act as if I wasn't concerned about his call nor his presence. When I got to my desk there was note with no name on it. I looked around the room, and locked eyes with Brandon and he was smiling innocently. I opened the paper up and it said "Hey Miss Lady meet me in the courtyard after school.". No question about who it was from , because he was the only person who called me that. I surveyed the messy crew of girls that sat around me to see if they were peering over my shoulder. Then I looked back at Brandon who had started his work. The loud speaker comes on in the classroom reminding everyone that prom fees were due, and reminding me that I had no date. Everyone was so excited, and I wish I could have felt that moment. Mama and Tia had been on a dress hunt since before Christmas. I went with them a few times, but it only made me sad. "I should just go alone.", I thought to myself. I made it through class, and actually got some work done. The rest of the day was a blur to me, because I was ready to meet Brandon after school. Still puzzled as to what he wanted that he couldn't just write it down on the paper. I walked out of the building, and he was no where in site. My heart dropped, and of course I started to beat myself up. "Girl you knew he wasn't going to be here.", I mumbled to myself. I continued on, and begin to walk home and, I heard in the distance "Miss Lady!". I turned around and said ... "Yea you got a lot of nerve if you thought I was about to wait for you. " His jog came to a halt beside me ... "Hey, Mr. Dunlap was tripping, and wouldn't let the class go til it got quiet. ", Brandon explained. I didn't respond because I honestly didn't know what to say now. "So am I walking you home, or are you gonna hold up a second? " Brandon asked. "You don't have to walk me anywhere. What do you want anyway?", I snapped. "Dang why do you always have to be so defensive Nina? I'm not trying to harm you or nothing." Maybe I was being a bit difficult, but I wasn't use to someone like Brandon Marshall taking the time to even act as if I existed. "I'm sorry it's just that, I have been wondering what you wanted with me since yesterday, and..", he cut me off... "Will you go to the prom with me Nina? " Wait, for a second I think this boy just asked me to the prom. No, I couldn't have been hearing him right. "Say what?? You want to do what? " I asked to make sure I heard correctly "Want to take you to the prom. Will you go with me?", he repeated. I was trying process what I had just heard, but that's hard to do when you don't believe what you heard. "Why, why do you want to take me to the prom?" "Why wouldn't I? " he replied. "Because I'm fat Brandon. No one wants to take the fat girl to the prom. No one wants to be seen with the fat girl." "Nina your size doesn't matter to me, it never did. Since the first day I laid eyes on you, I thought you were so pretty. I mean you fine as hell to me.", he said as he grabbed my hand. This had to be a joke, were they trying to pull some "Carrie" type shit on me. "Look Brandon, I don't want to go to the prom with you or anyone else. I am not a charity case." I could tell I touched a nerve, because Brandon's whole facial expression changed. He was as serious as the day I saw him check Rayford in the hallway. "Look Nina, I don't play games with anyone. I damn sure don't look at you as a charity case. Maybe if you dropped the tough girl act, you could see that I genuinely like you . I have been showing you that I was digging you since you were in ninth grade." He was right, he had always been kind to me. I remember when I couldn't find my way to my Civics class in ninth grade he walked me there. I remember the time, I couldn't get my locker open he was there. I remember all the times someone said something negative about my weight, Brandon stuck up for me. I was so hell bent on defending myself and having a wall up, I didn't realize he was always so sweet to me. "Brandon, I just don't know what to say." "Say you'll go to the prom with me is all I need to hear you say. " he replied with a smile that melted something in me I didn't know I had. "Can I think about it, and give you an answer later? " He stepped back and said "Okay cool, in the meantime I'm about to go buy our tickets and I'm calling you at seven o'clock on the dot, to hear you say yes." I couldn't help but blush at how forward he was being . I agreed to the call, and we went our separate ways. Deep down inside I was so anxious to get home and tell my mama the news. I already knew I wanted to tell Brandon yes. I definitely couldn't wait to start dress shopping for my prom dress. I got home and ran to my moms room. She and Tia was looking in catalogs full of beautiful formal gowns. "Guess what!?!", I screamed in excitement. "They added a new snack to the vending machine at school?" Tia said. "Tiiiaaaaa stop it" my mama said. I ignored her because she wasn't about to spoil my day. "I got asked to the prom! ". My mom hopped off her bed ran to me, and hugged me with the most joyful screams ever. "We all can get up bright and early tomorrow and go dress shopping. I am so excited both of my babies are going to the prom. So who asked you?" mama asked with excitement "It was Brandon!!" My mother's whole mood changed. Her enthusiasm diminished instantly. "Brandon? The boy who Tia said was the football star?", she asked. "Wait wait wait wait, really Nina, Brandon Marshall ask you to the prom?" Tia asked as she held back her laughter. For once my mother didn't hide the fact that her and Tia were on the same team. "Why would Brandon ask you to the prom and why would you think he would want to seriously take you? Girl get a clue he had to be joking." I didn't know whether to run to my room and hide from the hurt, or finally stand up for myself the way Brandon had always done when people degraded me at school. Something inside of me sparked, and for once I was not about to be Tia's door mat. "Yes!! Yes!!, he asked me to the prom and he was real serious. Why?, Why wouldn't he want to take me? What's so bad about me that you feel I can't have a boy like Brandon ask me to the prom?" I shouted, and I mean I shouted so loud they both stepped back. "Well first of all your fat Nina.... " "Tia go to your room NOW!", my mother shouted. "But mama " Tia whined. "I won't repeat myself." my mother shouted. Tia like always pouted, and gave me the evil eye as she left the room when my mom got fed up with her. My mom walked over and took a seat on her bed and motioned for me to come sit next to her and I did. "Nina you are a beautiful girl, and I don't want to see you hurt . That boy couldn't mean you no good. Why would he ask you out? Why now? " she asked I couldn't believe it my mom finally didn't hide behind my sister's nasty comments, she finally had the guts to say them herself. "So a cute boy can't ask me out mama? Am I that disgusting mama?" I asked with teary eyes "No baby I am just saying." she explained "I know, I know what you are saying. You are saying everything that dad use to say to you after you put on all your weight. He would belittle you right in front of Tia and I." "That has nothing to do with this and watch who you are talking to little girl " she responded, as she stood up from the bed with the most angry hurt face. "Yea mama, I remember him telling you no other man would want you, and how he could have beautiful women, and how if it wasn't for us he would have left you fat and dry. So because a man didn't love you that means no one will love me either, hunh mama?" It was as if my father had took over my body, and was spewing his hateful words right through my mouth. I lost control, and I couldn't take back a word I had said. I had said too much. I waited for my mother to back hand me, or scream, or worse, but she didn't . She was hurt, that kinda hurt that weakens your knees and ties your throat in queasy knots. She walked out of her room, and I stood there as if I were in quick sand. My defeat was bitter sweet and my happiness was espunged. I had to give Brandon a happy yes through so much angiush. - Author Nairaz

[foxxema]

March 2 2017

DAMNNNNNN SON! Long time no write? (I’m lame)? Lot has happened and I’ve recorded none of it. Today was the last day of midterms and I’ve officially made it to spring break. I got my gov midterm back today and got a 5 so I’m very proud of that. I’m honestly not too stressed about the AP exam because I’m doing well so far and I’m genuinely interested in the class. Today we didn’t really do much and Wedge talked about Destiny’s food throwing habits, his plan to run for presidency and go to war with Canada, and the possible “super meth” state that would appear if West Virginia and Kentucky combined. The only other notable class was ceramics because it’s so nice and calming. Kinda sad that I wont be taking it next year, as it’s a great was to destress. I also drove to the dog park with Elvis and Dad but we left within 30 minutes because it was cold and the sun was setting. Still nice to get out of the house and do something for Elvis though. P.s. The mugs from Jun came in the mail today LMAOOOO I am a poodle mom! I kinda wanna put a plant in them but then the drainage wouldn’t work… ehhh nvm then. AH I also met Dan (whomst) and we talked about plants and Italy so maybe we will be friends soon. We will see. I reread some of the old stuff that I wrote on here and just to clear up some things that have now happened: -I very much so regret not taking the yoga class with Ella, but we are going to try aerial yoga after spring break

–You did shit on that math test from like November? Wtf girl! It doesn’t matter tho bc that semester is over.

-Dunlap isn’t actually a hard grader. That one particular paper wasn’t as strong as your others and you’ve dramatically improved your writing since then. Keep at it! (Fun fact emma: on Wednesday u got ur paper back and u got a 96 buT he counted off for an error that was actually correct. Being the little obnoxious fuck that you are, you showed him and ended up getting a 99… u go glen co co)

… ……. And on a side note: Let’s try posting a snippet from every day on here!! U can do it emma! Stop forgetting! Also MAKE A DIARY ON GOOGLE DOCS OR SOMETHING like Grant did because this will be cool to read later

What if my kids read this one day IF I HAVE KIDS??? lol life is weird …… I’m going to shower because it’s 12:57am so technically this is a day late but fuck it, it’s still March 2nd somewhere (Vancouver, Canada?) ……… lol Vancouver=struggles …… WTF EMMA GO SHOWER AND SLEEP NOW U LEAVE FOR VACATION TOMORROW AND U HAVEN’T EVEN PACKED

[waynedunlaptheorgandonor]

jsyk, it may be slow going, but i've worked on diy steps to serenity every day this week and am getting close to posting again soon ❤️

#mb two and a half scenes left? #ish? #i promised i was still writing and i am! #just wanted you to know #caryl #twd #diy steps to serenity #dunlap writes shit

[waynedunlaptheorgandonor]

fic question: does aaron have a last name?

#trying to update btw #caryl #twd #diy steps to serenity #dunlap writes shit