#eat your cheese rat boy

[robynlilyblack]

A snake and his little bird

Regulus Black x fem! sunshine! reader (gn! version)

Summary: Y/n has been keeping her relationship with a certain Black brother secret, but when James starts investigating why she's always stealing the map she's in hot water

Warnings: swearing, some angst, hurt comfort established relationships (reader x regulus, wolfstar), kissing, mentions of food, eating, sex, toxic family and abuse

A/n: 4.1k words, reader is in regulus' year but is a marauder and like them a Gryffindor x thank you for the request! Enjoy 💛

Navigation | Marauders Era Characters Masterlist

You doodled in the margin of your parchment, mostly little drawings representing you and your friends animagus forms. A stag for James, a dog sitting in a crescent moon for Sirius and Remus and a rat laying a top of a cheese block for Peter

You were just adding detail to the wings of your own form when a little bit of paper landed in front of you. Looking up at the professor you saw he was still droning on about some kind of charm, merlin did you hope Flitwick would be back soon because this guy sucked 

Although one silver lining was with him not paying attention you could unfold the paper, smiling as you instantly recognised the impeccable handwriting

You look pretty today

Glancing to your right you see Regulus sitting with Barty at the other end of the classroom, Barty seems to be busy trying to do what seems like origami while Regulus is already subtly looking at you

You scrawl on the paper holding it up, you say that every day, you bite your lip

His lips tug gently, an act most would miss but not you. He writes on his own parchment, because it’s true, and in my defence I said cute yesterday, he holds it up briefly, long enough for only you to read and not even Barty notices, although the boy wouldn’t really mind anyway, just give your boyfriend a good teasing for it

He revels in your reaction, that smile that you always wore just that little bit brighter when he was around, he gives you a little nod before returning to watch Barty and you go back to your drawings  

Around 10 minutes pass and you were just beginning to sketch the constellation Regulus lies in when a little flower lands on your desk

Picking it up you unfold the little flap that says, open me, doing as it says you smile at the words, still on for our date little bird?

You look over, noticing Barty’s flowers are terrible compared to this one and you nod ‘Just need to grab the map first’ you mouth to him and he nods

Soon enough class was over and as you walked out Regulus gently brushed his hands with yours, whispering a soft ‘see you at your spot’. You watched him walk off with Barty, Evan and Pandora with the biggest smile, your relationship wasn’t exactly secret, his friends knew, and Lily knew being the one to cover for you in your dorm, but really you kept your relationship on the down low so your fellow marauders wouldn’t find out

You were two years younger than the boys but being Remus’ childhood friend, you were pretty much welcomed in the moment you got on the train in first year. In their fifth and your third they became animagus with you doing the same the following year…and yes it took entire year of you, James, Sirius and Peter begging for Remus to finally cave and let you do it too. Earning the nickname ‘chirp’ when you succeeded, not only from your form but because you were always upbeat and happy

Of course, they hated Slytherins, well, James and Sirius did with a passion while Peter and Remus were just wary of them. You didn’t mind them, sure there were Slytherins you wanted to punch and in fact had done as such back in second year, but most were actually pretty nice when the Lastrange’s of the world weren’t watching

“Prongs!” you call out as you see him passing, waving to him from afar

His head scoots up at the call, looking around until he spots you. A grin grows on his face, turning back to say goodbye to Marlene before jogging up to you

“Hey haven’t seen you all day” he throws his arm around you, pulling you roughly into him and making you giggle 

“Nice to see you too”

“So, what did you just escape from?” he asks, his arm more relaxed as you both walk aimlessly down the corridor

“Charms” you inform, leaning your head into him

You were closest with Remus but after he and Sirius began dating, you and James bonded more whilst they were being all couple-y. Peter was there too but he usually changed into a rat and went a nap in order to escape their pda. Which was something James couldn’t inconspicuously do, although, you and he did manage to convinced everyone you were his pet bird for a month last year…and may have helped him cheat just a bit on some tests and steal a bunch of stuff from the class storerooms

“Godric with the substitute?” you nod “How did you survive?” he wonders rather dramatically “No but really, how? Teach me your ways dear birdy” he uncouples himself and bows before you

“You’re silly” 

“I know” he takes it like a compliment as he should, returning to his previous position

“I just doodled and listened pans as she explained her latest experiment” 

He nods “Fair enough, although…” you keep your smile but you know that although “…just watch out with Pandora, she’s a little weird and that’s fine but she’s friendly with Slytherins alright?” he says it softly, like he’s trying to protect you

You give him a little nod “Sure thing Prongs” you say, not wishing to ruin the moment nor your chances of why you sought him out “Say” you stop walking “You mind if I borrow the map for a couple hours?” you ask sweetly

He nods right away, moving to get it out of his satchel “Hear ya go” he hands it over with a smile

“Thanks Prongs” you slip it into your own bag “I need to go but I’ll see you later in the common room?”

“Yeah see you then” he gives you a wink and smile, waiting until you walk off before it drops and he digs into his bag again to retrieve a certain cloak

James felt guilty following you, so much he almost turned back as well. Almost. He just had a funny feeling you were keeping something from him and the others, he didn’t think that something was necessarily a bad something, more he was just curious as to why you needed the map so often. 

Along the way he saw you stop at a window, checking your hair and putting on some lip balm. That’s when he smirked, you were seeing someone

He and the boys were protective, they’d defend you till the say they died but they weren’t so protective they would stop any person from seeing you. Still he knew why you might keep it a secret, Remus and Sirius kept theirs quiet for quite a while as did Alice and Frank, even if everyone and their grandmother could see it coming

“Back of the library, classy” he chuckles as he follows little ways back, this area was known for secret liaisons, yet he as he followed he ended up in an area he’d never been before, which wasn’t uncommon for him since you and Remus did the schematics for it

He watched you place your books on the table, satchel hanging over the back of the chair along with your robe, looking like it was any other study session until…

“Saucy” he notes, watching as someone wraps their arms around you from behind, kissing your neck

He was about to retreat and give you some privacy but then he registers the green tie as you turned around. Pushing his glasses up he grimaced at the scene, watching you get pressed against the bookshelves by a snake of all people…and not just any snake

“Pads is gonna flip…fuck” he curses, shaking his head and quickly walking out of the library, debating all the way back of what to do with this new-found information

It was a shame he left so early, completely misinterpreting the scene as a hook-up rather than what it truly was, two people who were more than a little in love with one another meeting for their bi-weekly study date

“Sorry lovely” Regulus apologies, his thumb trailing over your now plump lips 

You shake your head lightly, not wanting to disrupt his movements “You never have to be sorry for kissing me” you can’t stop the smile from spreading on your face, not when he’s shining down at you like this 

He pecks your smile “Still” his arms gently peel you off the bookshelf, one slithering around to rub the impact mark “Didn’t mean to give you a possible bruise…in more than one area” he nudges his nose into your neck

You sigh at the small circles on your back “It’s okay, doesn’t hurt so don’t worry your pretty little head” his cheeks raise, a dusting of pink coating them at you calling him pretty

This was the Regulus few got to see, the mushy one who was a complete softy for you, his Gryffindor birdy. The one that could make him flustered beyond compare with a single word, touch or glance

“You okay there gorgeous?” you tease him just a little and he licks his lips

“Stop” he says holding back the biggest smile 

He encourages you over to sit at the table, trying to compose himself but it’s hard when your around

“Or what beautiful?” you smirk

You watch as he quickly shrugs off his robes and cardigan, dragging the chair around so he can sit beside you before he pulls you down into the adjacent seat, his movements soft while his voice is firm

“Or I’ll do more than press you against the bookshelf” he warns, hand squeezing your upper thigh before sliding down towards the knee and resting it there

You let out a little gasp at his actions, remaining quiet as you open one of the books before whispering a soft “Handsome”

He chuckles, that small bit of firmness he held fading “You swallow a thesaurus?” he wonders kissing your cheek

“No” you shy away with a pouty smile playing on your lips

“How many more do you have because you better get them out now or we’ll never get through Slughorn's essay” his hand wraps further into your inner thigh, thumbs gently sweeping across the thin fabric of your tights

“Cute, stunning, charming…” you say quickly,

“Done?” he asks sweetly, the tint in on his face darkening

“Exquisite” you kiss his cheek “Magnificent” then one to his nose causing it to scrunch oh so cutely “Wonderful” you finish with a peck to the lips “Now I’m done” you grin turning back to the books and leaving him positively flustered

“Maybe over the course of two hours would have been better” he admits and when you glance back his cheeks are crimson “Merlin you make me soft” he lets out a little laugh 

“How soft?” you ask, positively beaming at him and his state

“Like the blankets we take the astronomy tower had a baby with a cloud and…I mean…okay I really don’t know where I was going with that but you get the idea” he covers his face as you both start giggling, leaning into you as you laugh together

“You’re adorable” you add and he pretends like he got a dagger to the heart

“You can’t surprise attack me with that you cruel women…I’m a puddle now”

You really were a ray of sunshine when you returned to the common room, that was until you were greeted with no one but your friends sitting around the couches, looking like they were plotting for war

“Who pissed us off this time?” you giggle, dropping your bag off your shoulder and letting it drag as you reach the couches

They didn’t laugh. Remus and Peter looked nervous, the former rubbing Sirius’ back in a soothing motion, something he only had to do when his boyfriend was beyond upset. Your eyes flicked to James, he didn’t look as angry as Sirius but more disappointed, and somehow that was worst 

A pit started forming in your stomach

“Where were you?” Sirius asks, voice cold

“The library” you try to keep your smile, hoping maybe they’ve just had a bad day

“With?” he says shorty, pressing his lips together to spot himself saying more

“Why does this feel like an interrogation?” you swallow hard, heart thumping in your chest hoping to merlin this wasn’t happening, that maybe you fell asleep during study or this was some weird prank

Sirius sits forward “Maybe it wouldn’t if you weren’t off fucking my little brother?” he comes right out with it

You froze, feeling like all life left your body as they stare you down, the judgement in his voice, the disappointment, the rage

“I…I wasn’t” you try to speak, to explain, but James just huffs a laugh

“I saw you, y/n” that was the moment you knew they may never forgive you, he used your real name “That why you’ve been asking the map multiple times a week since we started back? Off to your little corner in the library to get pressed up against it” he accuses

You felt your face warm at the knowledge he had seen you and then the guilt spread across your face 

“Are you going to keep lying to us?” 

Sirius stares you down to the point Remus sits back, an unreadable expression on his face as he knows he can’t prevent whatever his boyfriend will say

“I’m not lying” you insist “If you had just waited…” James cuts you off

“Waited to see you fuck a snake? Ugh no thank you” he almost sings the last bit with a look of disgust 

“My brother of all people” Sirius cuts in, his voice demanding “Why…just why?”

“I love him” you answer honestly as lies wouldn’t save you, besides you were done pretending

Their expressions freeze 

Peter and Remus looking taken aback and in thought, clearly processing, James just skips everything and goes straight to an almost sympathetic disgust, and Sirius just goes straight to angry, standing up and pointing

“No” he shakes his head “You don’t” he tells you “You don’t” he repeats harder

You felt tears prick your eyes but you hold it, trying to stay strong. You were the happy one, no one had ever seen you really cry and if they did it was usually due to pain

“But I do” you say weakly but there’s a firmness to it which makes Sirius look at you with pity

His hands grip your shoulders “I grew up with him so you listen to me when I say he is incapable of love. He’s a miserable sod, a grumpy bitter guy that cannot and does not love you” he slows down so the last words sink in

You shake your head “You’re wrong…you’re…you’re wrong” you manage to get out, voice breaking and it makes the boys wince

“I’m not, I wish I was but I’m not. You can’t see him anymore, he’s just using you to get to me. He doesn’t love you y/n, you mean nothing to…”

“Stop it!” you shout, pushing him away

They flinch at your tone “Y/n” Sirius tries to reach out but you step backwards

“No!” you let the tears fall not caring anymore “I love him and he loves me. You are all just too caught up in your own ideals and hate of Slytherins to notice how good a person he is”

“He’s a purist!” James exclaims “He called Lily a mudblood in his first year”

“Yeah James in first year! When he was 11 and scared, scared because guess who was also in that corridor? Malfoy, a 6ft platinum giant with a cane up his arse that won’t quit. Merlin of course he did because what was the alternative?”

“Not doing that! I didn’t stoop that low at his age” Sirius crosses his arms

“Yeah because you gotta come back here…” you gesture to the common room “...and be praised for it. Bet it be fucking different if you had to go down the dungeons like him, sleep a mere few rooms down from someone 6 years older that would have no remorse in beating you up for it”

“You’re being silly” Sirius says, clearly not wanting to listen because if he did then he would be the bad guy here, he knew the guilt that would come from it “You’re trying to justify it because you know he’s no good”

You scrunch up your face, so disappointed in your friends “Maybe you’re no good” is all you say taking the map out of your bag and shoving it into Sirius’ chest before walking quickly up to your dorm, ignoring all of their calls

The next morning the boys headed down for breakfast, with James and Sirius facing the Slytherin table, eyes fixed on Regulus as he chatted with Barty and Evan. He hadn’t noticed the stares, nor did he know you were currently in a little ball in bed crying and would be for most of the coming days.

James was half watching while Sirius gaze was fixated on his brother, trying to figure out what his endgame was with you. His eyes only tore away when Lily and Alice entered the great hall without you

Regulus noticed too, his normal little glance to see his girlfriend’s smile was now a sad stare at the girls, a stare Sirius noticed but choice to pass off as confusion instead of clear mild concern

You had managed to drag yourself into the shower today, now wearing the charmed jumper Regulus gifted you that smelt like him, already sniffling and ready to read the saddest, most depressing book in your collection

That was until there was a noise from your window, followed by its opening and your boyfriend tumbling in, hitting the floor with a thump

“Are you okay?” you crawl to the end of the bed

“Yeah yeah I’m fine” he says groaning and definitely not okay by his wincing as he clampers over to the bed, kneeling on the ground in front of you “Are you okay?” he asks a little breathless “I’m sorry for barging quite literally in but it’s been days” 

Your heart flutters and breaks all at once, how could the people you love not see this adorable puppy dog of a man in front of you that literally almost broke all his bones flying up and into your window to check you were okay

“They know” you start to tear up again “They know Reggie” 

His eyebrows knit before the realisation hits, his face morphing to fear briefly before he stands and moves to sit on the bed next to you, engulfing you in his arms

“We’ll be fine” he assures you both “No matter what”

Your hands clutch to his robes, not caring that he is freezing from the cold morning air “I know” you nod into his chest

He gently pulls your face back, cupping it as he wipes the tears “And you know I love you right?” his own eyes are glassy, both of you knowing that things were gonna be a little bit harder from now on but you wouldn’t let them win 

“I love you too” you return it softly

He gives you a small smile before leaning in to kiss you, lips salty from your tears but neither of you care. Unfortunately, the moment is cut short when your door opens, banging against the wall as it does and making you jump apart

Regulus’ face hardens, turning off the emotions switch he had developed in order to survive

“Hands off her” Sirius points at his brother

“Love” Remus tries to pull him back, the only one seeing the scene for what it was

Sirius shrugs out of his grip “No” he stares you and Regulus down “You are going to leave and never see her again, I’m not going to let you use one of my best friends to get back at me”

“Like hell I am” Regulus wraps his arm around you, feeling you nuzzle your head into his chest, fresh tears soaking through his shirt 

“Regulus” 

“Sirius” he returns his brother's angered tone threefold “I am not leaving when she’s upset. If anyone should leave it’s you, you made her cry” 

Remus, James and Peters expressions soften at that but Sirius doesn’t let up 

“I’m not leaving until you leave”

“Fine then I guess you better get comfy” his other arm comes around, cupping the back of your head in a soothing motion before he whispers reassurances to you

“I’m…” Sirius stops himself as he watches his brothers’ actions “…Why?” is all he can say

Regulus holds you close, peering up at his brother “Why what?” he knew what he was asking, he just didn’t know how to answer it just yet

“Why her? Of all people Regulus why one of my best friends” 

“You can’t control who you fall in love with” he says, looking down at you

You raise your head, letting him plant a kiss you’re your forehead before you burying yourself back into his embrace

“You can’t love” Sirius shakes his head, tears forming “You can’t because you never loved me…you never showed any emotion after I left for Hogwarts” 

Everyone’s heart broke, the cracks in his voice, Remus having to take James’ hand to stop himself from hugging his partner while Peter rubs his back

“I do love you” Regulus’ hard expression finally breaks “I never stopped”

“Why didn’t you come with me then? When I cried, poured my heart out while I was still bleeding…you closed the door in my face” 

Regulus winces at that, you don’t have to see him to know. You kiss his chest, hugging him tighter as you knew how much he hated himself for that, how much he wanted to go back…how he had also packed a bag but by that time Sirius had already left and it was too late

“I wanted to, I was just scared” he confesses “When you got sorted into Gryffindor mum and dad were so mad they spent every waking moment conditioning me to…” he makes little bunny ears with his fingers “…not make the same mistake you did”

Sirius moves to sit at the end of your bed, signalling the other boys can stay when they attempt to back out

“They hurt me too when I asked why it was a bad thing, eventually after talking with Evan he told me that the best thing to do is to pretend. Have a switch you can turn off and just feel nothing…and for a while I did that, to the point I was just existing” 

He caresses your hair before looking back at his brother

“Then one day I was in the library and y/n came along, sitting next to me like it was nothing” he lets out a small chuckle “Talking my ear off about some kind of plant and how it was so cool…”

“It was cool” you mutter earning small chuckles from the room, James and Peter moving to sit on the bed next to yours while Remus sits behind Sirius, placing a kiss to his shoulder

“Sorry what I meant was she was telling me about this super awesome…ouch love” he groans as you pinch him “Anyway” he turns back to his brother who is watching him curiously, a lips tugging upwards as he observed yours and his interactions “After a few weeks I finally spoke back, realising she wasn’t a…ploy from you” he winces “She helped me. That switch that had been stuck off was finally on again when she’s nearby” 

You shift away from his chest, still leaning on his shoulder but you could see your friends again

He looks down at you “She helped my live again, smile again” he says, doing just that “I love her and I love you. I never meant to hurt you Siri” he turns back to his brother, seeing the surprise yet comfort the old nickname from their youth brought as it slips out

“I never wanted to hurt you either” he nods, blinking the tears from his eyes “I love you too Reg”

“Fucks sake hug!” James says sniffling with Peter tissues in their hands “Please you're killing us” he waves for them to embrace, this tissue causing him to resemble one of those mothers from period books

You and Remus giggle, moving away from your significant others to the middle of the bed. You intertwined your hand with his while he wrapped his other around you, both watching as the brothers hug for the first time in 7 years

“We always joked about being siblings but in a few years that might actually be true” Remus whispers to you

“We always were overachievers” you whisper back, giggling together while James seems to cry harder…and they call Remus the mum of the group

Thank you for reading 💛

General Masterlist

#regulus black x reader #regulus black x y/n #regulus x reader #regulus black x female reader #regulus black #regulus black and reader #regulus black x you #regulus x you #regulus and reader #marauders era #marauders #regulus and sirius #wolfstar #remus and sirius #regulus black imagine #marauders fic #regulus black fluff #marauders x reader #regulus black fic #robynsrequests

[emeritus-fuckers]

Hewlloww could you do the “a kink for every Papa” just with the ghouls? So a “kink for every ghoul?”

Have an amazing day you sweet human being. The papas love you <4

Decided to combine these two asks to make it easier on us because there's like thirty ghouls and we'd die if we tried this separately. there's a lot of color because i'm autistic and i deserve to color the post, that's a whole 30 ghouls. - rat

A kink for every Ghoul

CW: CNC for Chain.

Fire Ghouls

Alpha (he/him)

Alpha may not seem like it, but the threat of a knife in bed turns him on. The Fire Ghoul will fight you a bit, but just give in once he feels the bite of the blade in his skin. If you don’t slice him up like swiss cheese he won’t be happy.

Ifrit (he/him)

Ifrit has beautiful tits. Seriously, he’s about to bust out of that uniform of his. Because of those large tits... he is extremely fond of getting on his knees and letting someone fuck them. He loves fucking a nice pair of tits, sure…but it hits different when he’s the one covered in cum.

Sodo (he/him)

Sodo is a big enthusiast of making you bleed. It doesn't matter if it's with his teeth or claws. Obsessively eating you out on your period is also fair game. Just about anything that has to do with blood.

Blaze (he/him; Papa Nihil's Ghoul)

His name didn't come from nowhere. Blaze is a big fan of weed. And other drugs. Of course his favorite kind of sex is high sex. But, if you've got any aphrodisiac on hand, he's not gonna be fussy about that. He'll take it like a good boy.

Water Ghouls

Chain (it/ghoul)

Just by looking at it, you can tell that Chain is the kind of ghoul that loves CNC. Ghoul loves being the victim of it, or doing it to someone else. It prefers doing it to someone, though... It loves chasing you through the woods. Smelling your fear and excitement. Shoves you down and uses you as much as ghoul pleases.

Lake (he/him)

Lake might not seem like it at first, but he's actually surprisingly fond of making you squirm in pain. Biting, scratching, some light choking or using toys that will hurt you so good... Yup, you guessed it. Lake is a sadist. And a proud one, at that.

River (they/them)

They’re a whore. Plain and simple. Plenty of dirty dreams in that head of theirs... though they love when those dreams are made worse by someone fucking them in their sleep. Consensually, of course... enthusiastic consent, really. They return the favor as well... watching their partner wake up screaming in pleasure is always fun.

Cowbell (they/it)

They love seeing you in a blindfold. And other forms of sensory depravation, of course, but its favorite is taking your sight. They love watching you tremble and jump whenever it does anything. They loves seeing you squirm from the softest touches. After all, when you can't see, everything else is so much stronger.

Mist (he/she)

Tentacles, plain and simple. Fucking Mist is straight up monsterfucking, since he has tentacles coming out of her cunt. Wanna be egged with those tentacles of hers? All you have to do is ask and he'll stuff you full. Sleeping with Mist is an experience in itself. A rollercoaster of an experience, actually.

Rain (she/he/ve)

She's a very soft person in bed. He can get mean, yes, but ver preference is soft and loving. So soft and so loving, actually, that he wants you to cry from it. There's something so pretty in your tears that she can't resist overstimulating you just a little bit to see those tears again. Rain is definitely a dacryphiliac, though ve'll never admit it.

Storm (they/he; Papa Nihil's Ghoul)

Storm is generally very calm. That is, until they're in pain. Then he turns into a whimpering mess, begging for more, like a whore. C'mon. You know you wanna hurt them a little, don't you? Treat this masochistic slut the way he needs to be treated.

Earth Ghouls

Cliff (they/he)

Cliff is a very relaxed, pleasant dude. You'd think he'd be a nice, soft partner in bed, too, but in reality... They love having you tied up. Or cuffed, preferably. Just for a little, so he can rail you stupid enough to not be able to move in general. And then they take care of you, like the loving boyfriend that he is.

Pebble (he/him)

He doesn't really get bothered by his height, especially since it makes bottoming easier and Pebble is an absolute bottom. A cute one. He loves it when his partner (especially if it's the love of his life!) takes care of him. Certified pillow prince.

Ivy (he/xe)

Xe is likely the biggest fan of edging in the world. It's almost a necessity at this point. If it's a cock ring or just shoving him down and sucking him off until xe's whimpering so beautifully. Over and over. And over. Until those pretty eyes are overflowing with tears and just can't anymore.

Mountain (he/him)

Oh, such a innocent little lamb, isn't he? He just loves to be coaxed and taken by someone oh, so dangerous... loves to be corrupted. To be ruined. In both ways. He is the biggest squirmer. Will not stop moving until he's just too fucked out and too filthy. Ruin him and make this little lamb dirty.

Quake (they/them; Papa Nihil's Ghoul)

Quake is a very goofy, cheerful and energetic person, who very often just can't stay in one place for too long. That is, of course, unless you're on their lap, keeping their cock inside you. Then they just melt completely and stay put until you decide it's over. They will beg for just a few more minutes, though.

Air Ghouls

Eurus (they/she)

We all know she likes to stare. We've seen them in Year Zero and the studio recordings. Eurus loves to watch and stare. So of course, if you want to fuck someone else (which she's never opposed to, of course!), they'll request to watch. Won't even blink. She wants to see everything you do. Might jerk off in her seat as they observe their pretty darling railing someone else... or getting railed, preferably.

Zephyr (they/he)

Zephyr is possessive. Not just a little. They claim it’s instinct. However, nothing gets them riled up more than seeing the marks he left on your skin from your passionate late night sex. Though they get even more insistent on marking if someone else left their marks behind. Just as a reminder who you really belong to... and those bruises and bitemarks look so good on his lover.

Cirrus (she/ze)

Ze's a big enthusiast of using both her dick and her cunt (as well as mouth and those really well trained fingers) just to make you completely stupid. No matter what genitals you have, she'll fuck you brainless. And then ze's gonna coo at you, fawning over how cute you are when you're such a blabbering mess like that, and all of it just for her! Cirrus absolutely adores having you overstimulated.

Cumulus (she/her)

We all (well me) love her chest. So it's a very pleasant surprise to find out that they lactate with just a smallest bit of stimulation. If you really wanna drive her crazy, have your fingers or a strap inside her as you suck on her tits. Bonus points if you team up with Cirrus and then take care of our dearest Cumulus.

Tornado (ze/zir; Papa Nihil's Ghoul)

We can't talk about Air Ghouls and not have at least one of them mess around with your breathing abilities, now can we? Fortunately for us, Tornado loves breath play. Sometimes it's just a light squeeze. Sometimes you almost think this maniac will actually suffocate you. Ze knows your limits, though, so it never gets out of control. The thrill is a very nice bonus to fucking zir, though.

Quintessence Ghouls

Omega (he/him)

Look at him. Look at this huge motherfucker. Pretty much anyone is tiny compared to him. And he loves that. He loves seeing your stomach bulge when you're full of him. He loves seeing how you struggle to take as much of him as you can. He loves how your face ends up stuffed in his chest as you straddle him because of his stupid huge cock. The size kink is strong with this one.

Delta (they/it)

Delta admittedly jokes about their missing limbs. One of said jokes was how easy it’d be to tie it up... the day it goes from joke to reality? Oh they’re on cloud nine. Turns out it was very into doing shibari on others before the limb loss... turning the tables on them? Well... it has a very pleasant night tied up all pretty with nowhere to go.

Aether (he/him)

Listen. I've always said he's got arms made for hugging, hands made for choking and a cock made for warming. I stand by that. His hands look and feel like they were meant for your throat. And you love it. It's best while he's got you in a reverse cowgirl position in front of a mirror, riding yourself stupid as he lightly squeezes your throat. But he's not picky. As long as you let him choke you a little.

Phantom (he/they/xey/it)

Spiritually, Phantom is a bit like a puppy when it comes to excitement. He gets really excited and it shows. They usually show it through playful nibbles. But... you wanna know what absolutely makes xem lose its mind? Praise. Phantom can die happily after being praised for how good he's doing for you. Praise them and it'll do absolutely everything for you. Xey can probably be praised into a happy, tearful orgasm like this.

Chaos (he/she/they/it; Papa Nihil's Ghoul)

If you've read the Papa Nihil's Ghouls post, you know she was dragged around on a leash a few times. The issue is, he actually loved that and now they demand to be kept on a leash... So yup, that evolved into a pet play kink. It will bark at you completely unprovoked for completely no reason and will continue being a menace until you handle it. So there's a pet play and brat taming combo here.

Multi Ghoul

Swiss (he/xey/it)

This bitch. Bully it. Swiss loves being bullied and degraded. It always makes both xeir cunt and cock drip with pre-cum. Keep him on his knees. Keep xem on a leash. Mock it for being so fucking eager to be pretty much verbally abused. You can probably get xem to cum untouched if you're mean enough.

Phil (he/him)

Phil is not a kinky guy, honestly. He's just... very vanilla. If you're with him long enough, you finally get to hear him mumble out the word mommy... And you absolutely fucking lose it with him. You don't let him live it down, obviously. He gets absolutely flustered every time you use his mommy kink against him.

Sunshine (she/her)

Sunshine's favorite thing about having a penis is having it buried inside their partner (she especially likes people with cunts since it shows really nicely), having them in her lap in a reverse cowgirl position and just... watching it all in the mirror in front of you both. Obligatory bites while she's at it, of course.

Aurora (she/they/fae)

While she doesn't mind being a pillow princess when bottoming, faer absolutely favorite thing is disinterest. She loves playing with your body and then scoffing and telling you to keep quiet. They absolutely love having you ride their thigh or rutting against it while she does other things. Fae just absolutely adores when you get whiney and start pleading for just a bit of her attention, even if you know they'll shame and degrade you for it.

~

Alpha, Ifrit, River, Zephyr and Delta written by Death.

Sodo, Blaze, Lake, Rain, Mist, Storm, Cliff, Pebble, Quake, Eurus, Cirrus, Cumulus, Tornado, Omega, Aether, Chaos, Phantom, Swiss, Sunshine, Phil and Aurora by Nosferatu.

Chain, Cowbell, Ivy and Mountain written by Zenith/Jasper.

Edited by Nosferatu.

Taglist: @charlie-is-a-menace @copias-fluffy-asscheeks @randodummy @tuttifuckinfruttifriday @calliedion-dungeon @randominstake @callmeicaro @thecuriouss @dio-niisio @the-fem1n1ne-urge @mybotanicaldemise @igodownjustlikeholymary @natoncesaid @bloodmoon-bites @plaquerat

#ghost band #ghost bc #ghost #ask #anon #ghost band x reader #ghost bc x reader #ghost x reader #nameless ghouls #nameless ghoulettes #nameless ghouls x reader #nameless ghoulettes x reader #alpha ghoul #ifrit ghoul #sodo ghoul #blaze ghoul #chain ghoul #lake ghoul #river ghoul #cowbell ghoul #mist ghoul #mist ghoulette #rain ghoul #storm ghoul #cliff ghoul #big earth ghoul #earth ghoul #pebble ghoul #ivy ghoul #mountain ghoul

[sehtoast]

Soothe Me (Homelander x Reader Powerswap!au)

18+ | gender neutral reader, light descriptions of gore, showering, he takes care of you | Fic Directory

He’d never admit it, but there’s a part of him that really likes when you come home like this.  Something sick and twisted in his core, something rotten that quivers with excitement every time you walk through the door covered in viscera.

Maybe it’s because of the way his life is.  He’s just some average, ordinary guy shackled by the restraints of a regular human life.  Wake up, take Ryan to school, go to work, pick his son up, eat dinner, sleep, and then repeat until he’s dead.  It wasn’t that he didn’t appreciate his simple life or that beloved son of his who he was so fucking proud of,  but the mundane…

He’d be a liar if he said he never wished he was special.

You make him feel that way though. When you show up at his apartment drenched in gore, he feels so very special.  He feels like the keeper of an especially violent creature that would maim anyone and anything but him.  Something that, despite its sharp fangs and jagged claws, would only ever touch him with tenderness– with softness.

Even at times when your hand has gone around his throat, he’s always known you would never.

So when you show up like that again, is it any wonder that John practically bounces out of bed to greet you?  Hands at your cheeks to thumb away chunks of whatever moron pressed their luck, fingers combing through your blood-slicked hair, a kiss pressed to a dried patch because he is only human and doesn’t quite want some stranger’s bodily fluids in his mouth.

He’s started wearing darker shirts because of you.  It’s hard to explain to a child why there’s a red handprint that won’t wash out of his clothes, but it’s much less obvious this way.  Your leather clad hands fall to his waist immediately and your grip flexes the tiniest bit to steady yourself.

You can feel his warmth.  You can smell him more than the reek of iron and intestinal gunk splattered all over your body.  He smells of… cooked chicken. Some kind of cheap cheese.  A bitter salad dressing.  The lingerings of milk on his breath.  He must have just finished having dinner with his son.

You shut your eyes and focus.  You can hear the boy in his room. Legos clattering, narrations of dialog.  He still doesn’t know about you.  John doesn’t know how to tell him in a way that’s not overwhelming.

You breathe a deep sigh as he frets over you.  It’s the same every time. He’s scared you’re hurt, inspecting you as he brings you to the bathroom.  You’re only half aware of what’s going on.  The running of the shower, the hands tugging at your suit, his clothes hitting the floor. 

You’ve had a terrible day and it’s all you can think of…

Somehow, though, he draws you away from all of that.  Walks you into the shower and under the stream.  He adjusts the temperature the moment he sees you flinch at the heat.

You still haven’t told him about all of… that.  Your life before being Homelander.  When you were a mere lab rat, a product in development, poked and prodded and tortured to see what made you tick– what could make you sell .  He knows a little, but… you don’t quite have it in you to see him look at you with pity.

The hands that touch you in that cramped shower take you away from everything.  You’re here, not there. You’re not fist deep in that stupid fucking assistant who found you arguing with your other half in the mirror.  What’s left of that fool swirls down the drain.  You’re not getting berated by Edgar or dragged into some stupid fucking publicity stunt. Ashley isn’t up your ass about your itinerary.  You’re here.

He’s here.

Lips press to yours, gentle and sweet, and he whispers to you.

“S’okay.  You’re home now.”

Home.   It was such an odd concept.  You’ve had many homes.  Each of the cells in the lab, the penthouse, your cabin.

None of those have ever felt like home.  Here, though..?  You imagine it must be as close as you’ll ever truly have to a home.

You press him to the wall, his wrists trapped in your hands as you nuzzle into his neck.  His pulse rings in your ears. It pulsates louder than the stream of the shower and his breaths that grow with anticipation and a touch of excitement.

You know he enjoys it.  You meant to turn this into some kind of a hug, but… all you can do is just stay like that.  Hidden against him, lost in the symphony of all that keeps him alive.

“Long day, sweetheart?” His breath gusts over the tip of your ear.  

You release his wrists and wrap your arms around him, drifting away.  You answer him in a nod and he hugs you closer.  He has to be the one to do the squeezing.  If you did it, you’d shatter him.

“Let me take care of you?”  He asks for permission first.  He knows you love his doting, the way he spoils you rotten, but sometimes…  

Sometimes you’re not able to accept it.  Like a stray dog, wounded and afraid, your mistrust and fear comes out on him.  He has a small understanding of why you bite.  Of how many hands have hurt you, how many times you’ve had this very thing promised to you only for it to be a carrot on a stick with which you’d be beaten for ever stepping out of line.

He knows you’ve been made to beg for that which others have by right of simply existing.

Love.

He won’t ever make you beg.

He tells you this as he lathers you with soap.

“I love you.”

He tells you again as he thumbs a cleanser onto your cheeks.  Looks you right in the eye and declares it with a soft smile, twinkling eyes, and a kiss.  Watches you become like butter in his hands, softening, melting.  The coldness in your eyes dissipates into something sorrowful and pained– something yearning.

He knows that’s how you say it back.  He hopes one day he’ll hear you say the words, but this is okay for now.

He washes you meticulously, carefully, until not even a whisper of pink tint remains in the suds.  He dries you before himself.  Stands there dripping and cold as he puts you back together, caring for himself only once you demand it.

He wouldn’t stop shivering.  You practically had to say something.

How is it that he’d sacrifice his own comfort to take care of you?  He’d give and give until you had to fucking force him to take.  He confuses you.  You’ve never met anyone like him.  

He makes you feel insane.

“Give me that,” you grumble, taking the blow dryer from him to fan it over his hair.  He’d already taken care of yours.  You feel practically out of your mind at how badly you’ve wanted to do this.  You run your fingers through his pretty blonde locks, ruffle them into place, fluff the front just right.  He practically purrs at your touch.

He’s just as bad as you in that regard.  There’s something about the way he preens in the mirror as he watches you, perks up and grins, adjusts his hair just slightly from where you’d styled it that makes you chuckle.

John can’t even begin to explain how happy he is to finally see you smile.

He brings you to bed.  Normally you’d be initiating shenanigans, teasing and touching him every step of the way, but you’re tired in a way that not even sleep will fix.  He’s told you before that it’s a mental fatigue– that you’re overloaded and need to make time for yourself.  That even The Homelander needs to take a break sometimes.

He’s adamant about it tonight. 

“You can stay here.  Use some of your sick days.” He schemes.  “You’ve gotta have some of those after all these years, right?”

When you don’t answer, his brows knit in confusion.  He knows that means no, which makes no sense to him– but he doesn’t press you to explain.

“I want you to stay here.”  He says firmly.  He squeezes your hands between his as he stares into your eyes, engulfing you in that oceanic gaze that has a special way of getting you to do damn near anything.

You find yourself nodding.  What did you care if you pissed off everyone at Vought?  It’s not like it’d be the end of the world, and you’d much rather be with him anyway.  You huff a laugh against his neck as you nuzzle close to him.

How many people have ever been able to sucker you into something the way he can?  Well, there was one person, but… what’s done is done.  

But, John?

He had a way about wearing you down with just a simple smile, honeyed words, pretty blue eyes, and a declaration of love.  You really like the way his grin grows wider when you agree.  You like the way he hugs you tight and kisses the top of your head in excitement.

There’s no one in the world like him.  Nobody at all.

Your Johnny is so very special.

#homelander #homelander x reader #homelander fanfiction #antony starr #the boys #i'm running out of pics that rep human homelander well lol #the boys fanfiction

[ghost-bxrd]

Correction. Jason fucking hates school.

Those fucking elitist assholes keep staring at Dick and him like they’re goddamn monkeys in a zoo. One had tried explaining the fucking concept of laptops to them earlier, like they’d been raised in the fuckin’ ass end of nowhere.

That guy had changed his tune real damn fast after Jason pointedly pulled out his own unreleased Wayne tech laptop and fired it up with a harsh glare.

Frankly, Jason wouldn’t be so ticked off if it was just him, but they keep. Targeting. Dick. After they realised that, wow, Jason isn’t the poor back alley rat with an IQ barely high enough to let him breathe correctly and take their shit lying down, they kept trying to crowd Dick.

After the third time some spoiled girl had tried touching the skittish talon in some guise of “Oh wow, your hair looks really soft!“ and Dick’s eyes had done the deer-in-headlights expression where he wasn’t sure if he was allowed to fucking say no Jason had snapped and nearly bit the offending hand off.

The surprised scream he got in retaliation was so fucking worth it, even if he’s pretty sure B will have choice words to say about it once they get back to the manor.

Sadly, Dick had also taken that reaction to mean that Jason felt threatened by the girl, which was… less optimal.

At least Jason had managed to keep him from literally tearing into her. If barely.

“I fuckin’ hate these snobs,“ Jason growls, opening their Alfred issued lunchbox with a bit more force than strictly necessary.

Dick coos inquisitively, back to his bird sounds in the relative privacy of the abandoned classroom they’ve been hiding out in since the fiasco during second period.

Jason hands him one of the sandwiches with peanut butter and jelly he loves so much and chooses one with with cheese and ham for himself, taking a vicious bite to vent his frustration in a way that won’t immediately get them expelled. “All these people thinking we’re some new and shiny toy. Wanna bet they think we don’t even know how to fuckin’ read?“

Dick eats at a more sedate pace from where he’s perched in a crouch on top of a desk, watching Jason rant with attentive eyes.

He doesn’t say anything, but that’s ok. Jason’s spitting enough vitriol for them both, and at least he knows that Dick is listening. Even if Jason were to suddenly switch topics and babble nonsense about the Teletubbies, Dick would still hang onto his every word. It used to be a bit creepy in the beginning, but now it’s… nice. Especially since he’d figured out how to interpret all the bird noises Dick makes.

“Really, if any of these privileged asswi-“

Dick’s head snaps up, body suddenly tense like a bowstring, and Jason whirls around so fast he almost gives himself whiplash, heart in his throat.

His eyes immediately lock onto the previously closed door where a wide eyed boy is standing, laptop under one arm, mouth agape, and looking more like a displaced toddler than a student with the pudgy baby fat clinging to his cheeks.

Dick makes a low tittering sound deep in his throat, wary but not yet hostile, and Jason takes one look at the tiny child that looks like he might start crying under the heavy stare of two older boys and exhales a groan.

“You need something, kid?“

The boy’s wide, blue eyes snap to him and Jason has to blink a bit at how similar they look to his own, if perhaps a few shades lighter.

He shuffles on his feet, clutching the laptop against his chest, “Uh, n-no. I was just- uh- homework.“

— Owl Song pt. iii Preview

#owl song #sneak peak #preview #snippet #drabble #batfamily #dick grayson #batfam #bruce wayne #robin #batfam fic rec #jason todd #tim drake #fic #talon dick grayson #court of owls #accidental child acquisition

[kaeyx]

royal au with street rat!chuuya

Sreet rat!chuuya who when he first laid eyes on you, you were the only thing he felt like stealing at the time he saw yiu

Street rat!chuuya who threw rocks at your window until you finally answered him with a grumble until he accidentally threw a rock at you

Street rat!chuuya who tried to rizz you up with stolen jewels and animals even though you know it’s a stolen and you scold him for it

Street rat!chuuya who finally gained your trust and you let him in your room by entertaining from your balcony

Street rat!chuuya who started coming every night to your room to continue and try and seduce you

Street rat!chuuya who gets jealous whenever other princes try to court you shoul

Street rat!chuuya who fucks you against the desk while saying how your his how no one can have you and that he practically owns you

-☃️ sorry if the grammar is shit I was writing this while watching duck tales for the 7th time and got distracted multiple times

I'm giggling kicking my feet over this one omggggg!! It got long, under a cut!

Sheep/street rat Chuuya going scavenging near the castle because he's the strongest of the group and isn't afraid of the guards. Plus the best scraps are obviously where the richer people live, sometimes he can even get some beer from the soldiers or a few bits of cheese. Seeing you through the doors of the castle or when you leave for whatever reason and deciding he's going to try his luck with you. He climbs up onto your balcony and sneaks into your room, throws rocks at the walls outside to get your attention, anything he can. Tries to gain your trust and begs you for a few meals first by putting up a kicked puppy façade then getting angry because you have so much extra, can you really not afford to feed your people? You're impressed by his courage and also the fact that he climbed up the fucking wall, plus he's strangely pretty for a beggar boy. There's fair skin under the mud and sunburn and he has gorgeous hair, even if it's greasy and matted. His eyes are bright and his features are delicate, and he moves with the strength and grace of an assassin. Under the old, baggy clothes Chuuya has thin hips, strong legs, broad shoulders for his stature.

He sits on your balcony during the night and tells you about eating rats and stealing chickens, about his family- all the orphan kids in town that he teams up with, and the vicious turf wars that they fight with the other children. Even though he's old enough to learn a trade nobody takes him in, he can't read or write and he's had no education, none of the guilds in the city want him and to be honest he's tired of trying and has accepted he'll live his life protecting the kids.

You're fascinated by how different his life is to your own and tell him about your education, the balls and uncomfortable clothes, the hours of meetings with allies that you have to sit through because one day all the lands as far as you can see will be your own, and you have to be ready. He laughs at the stupid rules for banquets and gatherings, and that one time you fell off your horse when you were learning to ride. You teach him how to write his name on an old scrap of parchment, and he keeps it in his pocket. The servants bring dinner to your room now and Chuuya always gets a share, but he bundles it up and takes it back to the others instead of eating it himself.

Eventually there's talks about suitors, of course. You complain to Chuuya about overhearing your options, an uncle that's half your age or a second cousin from another country or what have you. People you've never met. Chuuya seethes and you think it's on your behalf, but really there's a strange pit growing in his stomach. Will you still live here? Or will your spouse whisk you away to some faraway city, never to be seen again? Will there be a war triggered by your succession, taking you from him forever? You chatter on about the stable boy that keeps giving you hopeful looks and that one noble that always hangs around with their kid, trying to talk to your parents; and Chuuya sees red. He grabs the food and leaves without a proper goodbye, disappears into the night and leaves you confused and annoyed.

The sheep notice something is off about Chuuya, moreso than usual. They all have bets going on how he's getting so much food consistently, with most of them agreeing it's either prostitution or he's found a really good spot to steal from and hasn't told them. It doesn't help that he's so cagey about the matter, going beet red and dodging their questions. And it's even worse tonight because he comes back angry, and Chuuya never comes back angry. He always seems oddly thoughtful when he splits the food up amongst them, making sure the smaller kids get their share too; but tonight he dumps it on the ground still wrapped in his ratty cloak and leaves again without a word.

They find Chuuya asleep in the grass by the river next morning, one hand pressed to his chest, and he refuses to answer questions. He doesn't go out for food again, begging the merchants and stealing from taverns like the rest of the Sheep do, but never coming back laden with goodies like he'd been doing for the past few months. He's snappy and sullen and doesn't play anymore, doesn't even throw rocks at the rival kids when they have to fight for something. Just sits and thinks and paces around.

You on the other hand grow worried, then annoyed, then worried again. Days turn into a whole week and Chuuya never hops onto your balcony, light and nimble. He doesn't throw rocks at your wall to grab your attention. You always eat by the window, hoping to catch a glimpse of tangled red hair underneath. You leave him food like an offering and pray for him every day, you begin to lose sleep and worry the servants. He doesn't come back. You fear he's angry with you or worse, dead. Gone like so many other beggars before him. You miss him enough that you begin writing him letters he can't read, letters you can't even send, and keeping them in a little box by your bed. Telling him about your days and wishing him well, and imagining his responses. Cynical and brash as they could be, they're comforting to you. And he'd never been unkind.

Chuuya stays in your thoughts even when he shouldn't be, even when it isn't worry you feel. You'd always meant to give him a bath, but had been to embarrassed to say it. Maybe you should have taught him to read more than his and your names. He'd have made such a good knight, or blacksmith, or strategist- he's more logical than half the old idiots arguing around your father's map table. Nobody had ever taught him any manners so he'd never been afraid to speak to you, or to tell you how stupid some of your ideas were. Whenever you meet with a suitor you can't help but compare them to him. Chuuya is prettier, his voice is nicer, he's smarter, he's more honest, he makes better conversation.

You start to wish he'd come back for entirely new reasons. Maybe if you could clean him up, dress him in some of your clothes... it could never happen of course, the kingdom stands to gain nothing from that union, but you can dream. He could maybe learn to wield a sword and do good things, earn a living instead of begging for scraps like a dog. He could be yours, as much as law and custom could allow. If only he'd come back.

#asks.answered #chuuya.bsd #chuuya x reader #chuuya x y/n #beggar!chuuya #☃️ anon #I GOT SO INSANELY CARRIED AWAY LMAO #maybe i Do like royal aus #street rat!chuuya

[issuesntissues]

141 if they were dogs

and you can headcanon whatever breed, but this is just how their behavior would be to me :>

Price

the tail never wags

he is stoic, your standard guard dog

he basically lives for his duty, and then mopes on the floor

he doesn’t give any bite warnings, if you’re messing with him he’ll bite—

if he’s sleeping, leave him alone 😬

definitely not a family dog, but a good dog for loners or people who don’t have a lot in life

he loves raw steaks. if he is not fed raw steaks he will be grumpy

Gaz

Stoic like Price, but a calm approach and a head pat will earn you a small tail wag

a good guard dog for a small family!

he’s always on his feet but when he’s asleep, he’s out like a rock—

has an incredible nose, perfect for sleuthing

knows how to be gentle with small people and animals

definitely sleeps in the kids rooms

loves a variety of raw foods. must pay him the cheese tax

Soap

may god help you

he is hyper, he is built for outdoor activities

absolutely massive appetite, will eat whatever you give him and more (lock down your trash cans, and prepare to push him off counters)

if there’s something he’s not used to, he’ll chase it down immediately—

* always alert and vocal, if anything steps foot within his area of awareness, you’ll hear about it

although he wouldn’t be great in a family household, he gets along well with older kids (or anyone with high energy tbh)

he’s a working dog at the end of the day, and needs high activity daily exercise 🫶

Ghost

unapproachable— keep your hands and fingers to themselves

pure guard dog, and everyone can see it with how many scars he has

he has adequate hearing and smell, but impeccable eyesight

once he’s on the trail of something he won’t ever let it go—

eats nothing but raw meat of any kind (he needs protein 😳)

definitely not for any average dog owner, he’s handled by scary individuals

!! BONUS !!

König

a big dog, but he’s skittish—

was meant to be a guard dog, but got kicked out of service for being a big silly

has poor spacial awareness but an amazing nose

drools when he sleeps

if you have food, he’ll invade your space and take it (like a cow. look up a cow stealing food—)

definitely isn’t afraid to bite intruders (will mow them down and maul them if he wants to—)

💯 safe with kids of all ages (just make sure you have enough food, eats enough to fill 3 teenage boys. could eat a small human—)

Riptide

the most domesticated and least aggressive in the entire list tbh

love swimming, if he’s near any puddle or pool he’s diving right in—

excels at fetch, especially with frisbees

is the gentlest with kids, you can leave them alone with him—

has intimidating barks but they’re never aggressive, he’s mostly quiet—

loves the beach, gets all sandy and smelly ✨

has a good balance between guard dog, and family dog 💚

Keegan

you know outside cats? well he’s like that, only a dog—

comes back for food or if he’s injured/really dirty

he always stays near your home / around your neighborhood at night (he got a lil of that guard dog in him)

very quiet, never barks or whines, but if he’s fighting he’ll sound like a monster—

hunts rats for fun (doesn’t eat them though)

he would not be happy if someone took him off the street, he’s happy with his life style

#call of duty #headcanon #john price #kyle gaz garrick #john soap mactavish #simon ghost riley #keegan p russ #konig cod

[copperbadge]

I went to bed a little while after posting last night's Bad Novel Opening and slept for about ten hours, I think. Your man was tired, guys.

Also, my petsitting agency sends me photos every day around 4:30 in the afternoon local time, which is now the middle of the night to me, so I woke up to a lovely email from one of the sitters saying the cryptids are eating and their litterbox is scooped and one of them even came out to investigate!

POV: You just woke up and this is what you see:

I cracked up laughing and then got up to share it before I'd even had breakfast (which will be a Diet Coke excuse me, a Coke Light, they are NOT THE SAME, and a Babybel cheese) and a handful of cashews, because I now live like a highly caffeinated mouse.

Oh, speaking of which, in Amsterdam yesterday I did find the roundest boy, a unit and a guardian, in one of the local buildings:

This morning I'm going to try to backfill the image IDs. I don't have to be anywhere until the Musee D'Orsay at noon; plan is to locate breakfast (I have options, I just need to pick one), stroll around Notre Dame, then catch a bus from there. I had hoped to do a crypt tour but they only release tickets like four days in advance and I was on a plane when the tickets were released. Which, that's fine, something to do next time, I don't get to see the Vatican Museum either.

[ID: Two images; top, Dearborn the Tortie is sitting on a rug, shot from slightly below; she has her ears awry and head tilted and is clearly on the defensive, but also looks like a supervillain who was turned into a small cat. Below, the post of a doorway in Amsterdam, done in white stucco, which has a rat carved into the vertical corner; it's probably meant to be a rat on either side of the corner, but when shot from a certain angle looks instead like one enormous pear-shaped rat eating a nibble of something.]

#sam travels #the cheese tour #babybel saving my life this morning #dearborn and polk #amsterdam

[bwabys-scenarios]

Fixer Upper

Part 16

Perv!Kurapika x Fem!Reader

part 15

part 17

!!REBLOGS ARE APPRECIATED!!

taglist: @fabitheraven @tsukilover11 @ashdownunderscorebeloved @lemonslut @homeinmydreams @superweeniehutjrsblog @bugmomwrites @heartsforseo @lixiawinter @altaircc @itszenava @fiightforlovee @mimi-sanisanidiot @monainanuttshell @wow-im-gay @whorermoviestar @lightshowerrr @mama-m1na @aceywaceyboobybear @nenggie @wicked-binch

If you’d like to be ADDED to the taglist, please comment a red heart ❤️, make sure you’re able to be tagged/mentioned, and have your age in your bio(IF YOU ARE ALREADY ON THE TAGLIST, YOU DON’T NEED TO ASK TO BE ADDED AGAIN!!)

(Name) opened her door, a smile on her face. “Poks, Poni! Welcome!”

The two walked in, looking around her less than impressive apartment. “Oh, wow… it’s certainly an apartment.”

Pokkle elbowed the blue haired girl, who coughed before speaking up. “What I mean is, this place is lovely.”

“Thanks Poni, but I know it… average? I mean at East there’s no pests. My last apartment had a bad rat problem.”

They both grimaced.

“Yeah, they were like the size of my arm. Thought of keeping one as a pet. I mean, they were dog sized.”

“Dog s- never mind. We brought some gifts.”

(Name) gasped when they pulled out a gift basket and pot of flowers. “Guys, you shouldn’t have!”

She placed the basket on her counter, before looking at the pot of flowers. “What are these?”

Ponzu smiled, her bees flying around the small red flowers. “They’re poppies, Poppy!”

“Poppy?”

The two smiled at her. “Yeah, it’s your nickname. You call us Poks and Poni, so we’re gonna call you poppy!”

(Name) laughed. “Oh really? Is there a reason for that name specifically?”

———————

(Name) packed her suitcase yet again after seeing off her two friends. ‘I’m going to miss them…’

She pulled her suitcase towards the airport, where she’d be meeting Gon and Killua.

It was early July, and the two had asked her to join them on whale island to catch up and train.

“(Name)!”

She gasped when she felt someone jump onto her back. “G-Gon?”

He laughed, hugging her from behind as she tried not to fall over. “Hey, did you miss me?”

The weight on her back disappeared as she heard yelling from behind her. “Gon, you idiot you can’t just jump on people!”

“Killua!”

She turned around and pulled the two boys into a hug. “I missed you both so much. My sweet boys!”

Gon laughed, Killua halfheartedly swatting her away. “Let’s get boarded, and we can talk then!”

(Name) nodded slowly as they explained what happened in Heavens Arena. “You fought Hisoka? Gon…”

She patted his cheek, the boy leaning into her touch. “I’m okay, (Name). It was a… learning experience.”

(Name) sighed before leaning back in her seat. “I understand you want to get stronger, Gon, but please be careful.”

Gon nodded. “I promise I’ll be careful!”

They arrived on whale island after around 2-4 days of travel.

“Wow, it’s been such a long time since I’ve stood on my home ground! Ahh, the air smells so good!”

The two sniffed the air as (Name) pulled her suitcase behind them. “So, where’s your house?”

“We gotta take a bus to your house, right?”

“There aren’t any buses!”

(Name) hummed as she walked around, stopping by a market stall. She bought some bread and cheese, walking back to the two boys as they continued talking.

“It’ll take all night to get there? What are we going to eat?”

Gon held up his apple, and (Name) laughed. “Well good thing I grabbed extra.”

The three walked along the river, eating the food (Name) got along with the apples the captain gave them.

Early the next morning, the three spotted Gon’s house. (Name) trailed behind them, Gon pulling her suitcase.

“Aunt Mito, I’m back!”

Aunt Mito waved at them from the porch, (Name) sighing in relief. ‘Oh thank god.’

Killua and (Name) blinked when Gon sprinted off to hug Aunt Mito. They watched as they chatted for a moment, then Aunt Mito looked up.

“Oh, are these two friends of yours?”

“Yeah, we met during the Hunter Exam! She’s (Name), and he’s Killua!”

Aunt Mito smiled at the two. “Oh right, the ones your wrote about in your letter!”

(Name) gave them a polite greeting. “Hello, thank you so much for allowing us to stay.” she elbowed killua to get him to give a greeting as well.

“Hello…”

“Gon this is the first time you’ve ever brought home some friends to visit! (Name), Killua, right? I’m Gon’s Aunt Mito, I hope you two feel right at home!”

They followed her inside, (Name) setting her suitcase by the door. The two peeked inside it, both having places their extra clothes in as well.

“I really wish you would have let me know before hand you were coming home, I could of prepared something.” Aunt Mito said with a sigh, taking out ingredients.

(Name) hovered around the kitchen, feeling a bit useless.

“Whatever you’ve got is fine!” Gon said, grabbing (Name)’s hand and pulling her towards the living room.

“Well you knows it’s not every day we have guests in the house!”

“No, really, it’s fine.” Killua replied to Aunt Mito.

“I could help if you need it, I promise!” (Name) said, peeking into the kitchen again. Aunt Mito waves her off.

“You’re a guest dear, you just relax, I’m sure the journey here was tough on you.”

(Name) twiddled her thumbs, the two boys standing on either side of her.

“Now that you mention it we are kind of hungry. We’ve been walking since last night, so yeah!” Gon said, leaning his head against (Name)’s arm.

“Well I guess that explains why you three are so dirty. (Name) why don’t you go take a bath in my room? Gon, Killua, you two can use the big bathroom down the hall.”

“Wait right now?”

“Yes, just leave me your clothes. I’ll wash them later.”

(Name) gave her a polite nod before walking towards the room she pointed to.

After a nice shower, she walked back to the kitchen, sitting at the table. “Miss Mito, are you sure there’s nothing I can do to help?”

“Just Mito is fine, and it’s almost ready. You could help set the table, though!”

(Name) jumped up at this. “On it!”

Killua and Gon walked into the room, both now clean and wearing different clothes. The girl couldn’t help but squeeze their cheeks. “Aww, I think this is the first time I’ve seen you both all nice and clean.”

She gave them a hug before continuing her work. Killua followed behind her like a lost puppy, occasionally jumping back when she’d turn around.

‘Haha, he doesn’t want her to know he’s following her!’ Gon thought, snickering.

(Name) helped Mito set the table, patting Killua’s head as she took her seat. “Hungry?”

He nodded slowly, (Name) giggling at his excited face.

“This tastes great!” Killua said, happily munching on an omelette. (Name) nodded in agreement.

“You think so?”

“I told you Aunt Mito’s cooking is the best in the world!”

“Mito, you’ve got to show me how you got these omelettes to be so fluffy!”

The red haired woman laughed, basking in the compliments. “Of course!”

As they ate, Mito passed out more food,

“Here, try these.”

Killua stared at the red peppers, picking them off his plate and placing them on another.

“Killua! You really shouldn’t pick at your food like that. Don’t you know red peppers are good for you? You should at least try it.”

“Ahaha, actually I’m not really a big fan of these. Sorry.”

“Oh good, at least you’re not allergic to them! They’re delicious. Go ahead and take a bite, you’ll know what I mean.”

“She’s right Killua. What’s the worst that could happen?”

“Ahh! Mom, quick, get a towel!”

———————

The two left to go play in the forest nearby, leaving (Name) with Aunt Mito.

“So, how was your experience with the Hunter Exam?”

(Name) sighed, sitting down in front of her. “Exhausting, but…”

She glanced down at her phone’s Home Screen, smiling to herself. “I met a lot of important people there. Gon and Killua included. You raised a really sweet boy, Mito.”

Mito laughed, handing her a cup of tea. “I would hope so. Tell me, what was he like during the exam? He wouldn’t tell me everything, and I would like to know more.”

(Name) told her as much information as she could without potentially getting her younger friend in trouble. Mito nodded along, giggling when she saw how hot (Name)’s face got when she talked about Kurapika.

“So, this Kurapika… you like him, don’t you?”

(Name) sighed, hiding her flushed face. “Is it that easy to tell?”

Mito laughed. “Yes, it is. He must be quite special to have caught the attention of a sweet girl like you.”

They talked into the evening, and this time Mito allowed (Name) in the kitchen to help her cook. She taught her several tips and tricks, (Name) writing each one down.

The two boys got back all dirty again, being scolded and told to go take another bath. After that, they all ate dinner together.

“Time for bed, you two. I’ll be up in a moment, okay?”

Mito blinked when the two immediately listened to (Name)’s words. After the two were out of sight, (Name) realized what she’d done. “Oh, sorry Mito! I’ve just gotten used to taking care of them.”

“No, please don’t be sorry for that. I can’t tell you how thankful I am knowing Gon had someone like you by his side during the Hunter Exam.”

They shared a smile, before (Name) got up and stretched. “I should be getting to bed too. First I need to go say goodnight to both of them.”

She waved to Mito before walking to their shared room.

“(Name)!”

Gon was about to leap out of bed to greet her, but stopped when she shook her head. “Wait there, I’m coming.”

(Name) sat down beside him and leaned down to kiss his forehead. “Goodnight, Gon. Sweet dreams.”

“Goodnight, (Name)!”

She move on to Killua, who was impatiently waiting for her. She gave him a peck on the forehead. “Goodnight, Killua. Sweet dreams…”

She gave him another forehead kiss when he pouted at her. “And one more for good luck!”

The white haired boy swatted her away halfheartedly again, (Name) laughing. “Oh, I get it, you want me to go, huh?”

She stood up, about to leave before Killua grabbed her arm. She glanced back at him inquisitively, the boy unsure why he’d done that himself.

“… could you stay a little longer? Just until we fall asleep?”

(Name) took a second to register this request. ‘Where did this come from?’

Nevertheless, she sat back down, the boy snuggling up onto her lap. She hummed quietly as she ran her fingers through his hair.

Unbeknownst to them, Mito watched the scene from outside the door. ‘How cute…’

———————

(Name) woke up when she felt someone kick her. “Ow…”

She blinked her eyes open to see killua snuggled up against her, having kicked her in his sleep. ‘Did I fall asleep in the boys room?’

She attempted to get up, but the boy clinging to her grumbled at that. She glanced at the window to see it was still night time, maybe early morning. (Name) settled back into bed, making herself comfortable before going back to sleep.

“Alright boys, (Name), it’s time to get up!”

“Yes, Aunt Mito!”

Killua and (Name) groaned when the boy shook them. “Wake up!”

The sun peaked in through the window, shining down on the pair. Night was over, and (Name) had to use the bathroom.

“Okay, Killua, you gotta let go of me now.”

The boy didn’t answer, only cuddling into her closer. “Gon, can I get some help here?”

Gon ran over and grabbed Killua, pulling him away so (Name) could escape. She watched in amusement as the boy searched for her in his sleep, handing him a pillow to be her substitute.

After using the bathroom, she returned to the boys room to make sure Killua was up. He was, but barely. (Name) opened up her suitcase and laid out a pair of clothes for him to change into before going to her own room to unpack.

She unlocked her phone, scrolling to Kurapika’s contact and attempting to call him.

‘Oh, no service…’

For some reason, this made her… nervous. She would be alright going a few days without speaking to him because she knew it was because she didn’t have any service.

But he wouldn’t know.

Kurapika paced, his nen master raising an eyebrow an eyebrow at his unusual behavior. “What’s up with you, Kurapika? You’re acting strange.”

The blonde huffed, pulling his phone out and glancing at the time. On whale island, it should be around 10 am, and they usually called at 8 am her time every morning.

“Nothing. Nothing at all.”

His pacing continued. “Are you thinking of that girl again?”

Kurapika paused, shooting his master a look. “Tansy none of your business.”

“It is when it’s affecting your training.”

He sighed, sitting down in front of his master. ‘Is she really affecting my training?’

(Name) sighed. The day had passed by quickly, Gon and Killua watching a movie she downloaded on her phone as she folded laundry before bed.

“We’re gonna get the internet set up in two days, then you’ll be able to contact Kurapika again.”

Gon was trying to reassure her, but she could only continue holding to keep her mind off of it.

Kurapika tossed and turned again that night. He struggled to sleep without the sound of her sleeping on the phone. He slid open his phone and listened to a voice message she sent.

‘Hey, Pika, I just found the cutest dress! I’ll send you a picture in a minute. But before that, let me tell you about the crazy day I had!’

He chuckled as the message continued, eyes getting heavy as she explained her day. Kurapika clutched his blanket, chest feeling heavy.

‘Have I gotten so used to her that sleeping without her is impossible?’

Kurapika was able to drift off, but not peacefully. The weight of this knowledge weighed heavy on his heart.

‘Can’t… can’t keep going on like this.’

———————

“Once you got that cable hooked up, we should be able to access the internet!” Killua said, directing Gon.

(Name) eat near them, occasionally handing Gon tools.

“Gon?”

The boy leaped up to peer over the roof at Mito. “Yes?”

“I’m going out for a little while, could you watch the place?”

“Yeah, okay!”

“Thanks, I appreciate it!”

Gon glanced at (Name) and Killua, giggling to himself. The two ended up watching Mito’s bar.

Killua sat behind the counter, looking sleepy as (Name) swept the floors. When she heard him yawn, she made sure to finish up so she could carry him home to nap.

Unfortunately, he fell asleep before she was finished. (Name) shook her head at the boy, picking him up carrying him to his room so he could sleep peacefully.

When she tried to untangle the boy and lay him down, he grumbled again and refused to let go. ‘Oh, Killua…’ she thought, lying down with him. ‘Good thing Mito’s mother saw us leave…’

She attempted to keep herself awake, humming to the boy as he slept, but couldn’t help dozing off with him.

(Name) rubbed her eyes as she woke up, glancing out the window to see Mito cutting Gon’s hair.

“Oh, you two are awake! You both fell asleep on the job.” Gon said, Mito moving his head to trim the other side.

“Gon! Are you getting your hair cut?” Killua asked, climbing off of the bed.

“Yeah, it was getting kind of long.”

“Okay, now how about you? Do you want a haircut? Looks like you can use a trim.” Mito asked.

Killua glanced between the scissors and Mito, (Name) picking up on his anxieties.

“I can cut your hair, Killua.”

This made him sigh in relief. “Yes, that sounds good.”

(Name) sat him down in a chair outside, wrapping a towel around the white haired boy. “Wow, Killua, your hair is so soft…”

She ruffled his hair, causing Killua to huff. “Hey, I said you could cut it, not play with it.”

(Name) laughed, beginning to trim it. “Sorry, sorry. It’s just…”

She ran her fingers through his hair, humming. “You’re kind of like a dandelion. Hmm…”

She closed her eyes, then blew on his hair. The boy laughed, swatting at her half heartedly. “Hey, what was that for?”

“I just made a wish! They say if you blow on a dandelion and make a wish, it comes true!”

Gon nodded, sitting on the ground next to them. “Oh, I heard of that too! Aunt Mito said you gotta close your eyes and wish with all of your heart!”

Killua tilted his head. “Really? I never heard of that… so, (Name), what did you wish for?”

She giggled, continuing with his haircut. “Can’t tell you that, silly, then it won’t come true!”

Killua closed his eyes, enjoying the feeling of his hair being cut. ‘Hmm… this is nice.’

———————

Kurapika jumped when he heard his phone ring. He scrambled over to it, heart soaring when he saw (Name)’s contact.

“(Name)!”

He melted when he heard her giggle on the other end of the line. “Pika! Sorry for the wait, whale island has like no signal! Gon and Killua just got the Wi-Fi set up here, so I can at least call.”

“Oh…”

Several situations of why she hadn’t called had gone through his mind. They ranged from her forgetting, to purposefully not calling him, to her being injured or even dead. Not once did he stop to think there may be a simpler explanation like not having service.

“I’m having so much fun though! Toady Mito, or well Gon’s Aunt Mito taught me how to make the fluffiest omelettes! I can’t wait to make one for you, Pika!”

Although his tummy filled with butterflies at the thought of making something specifically for him, he couldn’t let those fuzzy feelings linger. “(Name), I need to… ask something of you.”

She went quiet, before nodding. “Go ahead, Pika.”

He inhaled, hand shaking as he looked down at her contact photo. It was the picture of her kissing his cheek, something he would never be able to forget.

“… never mind, it’s nothing. Please, tell me more about your time on Whale Island so far.”

Although she could tell he wanted to say something, she didn’t want to push him. After all, if it was something important, he’d tell her when he was ready.

After a few hours of mindless chatting, Kurapika ended the call. He bit his lip, swiping through the pictures (Name) had sent him.

He stared down at the pair of earrings she’d sent him for his birthday, holding them up to the light. They were rubies that dangled on silver chains, and he had been meaning to wear them.

Kurapika took the first one out of the box, eyes softening. They were beautiful, and he didn’t want to think about how much she spent on them. He put the first one on, using a stream as a mirror.

‘Pretty…’

Kurapika might not look like it, but he was a fan of jewelry. He tried to hide this little interest of his, not wanting to come across as greedy. After all, Kurapika was after people that collected disgusting things, he didn’t want to be associated with them in the slightest.

But right now, he allowed himself to stare at the dangling jewel, turning his head in different directions to watch it glitter in the setting sun.

He put the other one in before standing up. With a final look at himself in the stream, he knew what he had to do.

When the awful thought of (Name) possibly being hurt or kidnapped because of her ties to him crossed his mind, his immediate reaction was to do anything to get her back. And that… scared him. How had he let himself grow so attached to a person, let himself get so… soft?

Was he really willing to not only put her in danger, but jeopardize his mission because of her? If it came down between her and defeating the Phantom Troupe or collecting the scarlet eyes, what would he choose?

Kurapika scrolled to her contact, sliding to the left and pressing mute. ‘I can’t… I can’t allow myself to grow soft. She’s… she’s becoming a liability.’

He opened up his satchel, pulling out the small postcard she had sent along with the earrings.

“Though they dull in comparison to your scarlet eyes, I thought rubies would be the closest to complimenting them. Happy 18th birthday Pika, I hope I can celebrate it with you next year!”

-Love, (Name)

He felt tears well up in his eyes. Kurapika was really about to go through with it.

‘I’m such a coward, couldn’t even tell her that I could never see her again…’

He stuffed the note back into his satchel, throwing it over his shoulder.

“Master, I’m ready.”

———————

(Name) hummed to herself, taking a picture of her new pajamas and sending it to Kurapika and Leorio before leaving the bathroom.

Like usual, Leorio was quick to respond.

Oreo: looks great, sunshine!

She giggled, sending him a quick text back.

(Name): thanks, Leorio! Can’t wait to see you this September!!

(Name) waited for Kurapika to respond, eyebrows furrowing when five minutes passed without a response. ‘Hmm, he must be busy…’

“(Name), help!”

The girl looked up to see the boys rushing into the bathroom past her, Gon carrying something in his arms.

“(Name) knows medical stuff, she should be able to help!”

Gon pulled her into the bathroom, showing her some type of small cub. “Oh, Gon…”

The poor thing was panting, barely hanging on to life. They moved out of her way, allowing her to badge its wounds and place it on a towel.

“Gon, sweetheart…”

She was trying to think of how to deliver the new that the little cub wouldn’t make it when they began fighting.

“No way, I’m not gonna let you do that!” Gon exclaimed, pushing his friend away.

“Get out of the way, it’s too late! Listen to his breathing, he can’t be saved so I’m putting him out of his misery!” Killua said.

“No, you can’t kill him!”

“He’s not going to survive!”

“No, he will okay, because (Name) and I are gonna help him!”

“Ugh! That’s it, out of my way!”

(Name) stepped forward, pushing the two apart. “Hey, this isn’t a time to be fighting!”

“That cub is dying, so I just want to put an end to its suffering! Isn’t that obvious? It’s not going to survive, so it’s stupid to try and save it.”

“Killua…”

She grunted when she felt his sharpened nails pierce her skin. “I know you just want to end its suffering, but right now it’s alive, and I won’t let you be responsible for another living beings death!”

He stepped back a little, retracting his claws as his eyes bore into his hands. Blood, HER blood was coating his fingertips.

“Killua, let me shoulder this burden, okay? You’re a child, you shouldn’t be responsible for this.”

He sat down, bringing his knees to his chest. “But… killing is all I know.”

The room was silent for a moment, only the sound of the small animal panting able to be heard.

“Wait, we do know a way Killua! Our nen, we can use our nen to save the cub! Like when Wing transmitted his aura into us! Remember? He taught us that every living thing has its own aura!”

(Name) watched at the white haired boy perked up. ‘Nen?’

“You’re right… if we can enhance the aura of that cub, he could make it. It’s worth a try!”

The two approached the cub, their hands hovering over it. The air felt strange, like there was static surrounding her.

“Watch this, (Name). It’s something we learned in Heavens Arena.” Gon said, beckoning her forward.

“Let’s take it slow at first, we don’t want to risk hurting it.” Killua replied, glancing at (Name)’s bleeding arm.

For the next hour, the two kept their hands over the cub. (Name) gasped when she noticed it’s condition stabling, laughing. “It’s working, oh my god!”

The next morning, the three watched as the cub joined its father by the lake. (Name) stood behind the two, smiling.

“That was a very important thing you did, Killua.”

He turned, lip quivering. “Uh, thanks… ya know…”

His fingers ghosted over the bandage on her arm, eyes beading with tears. “I’m sorry.”

She waved her hand dismissively. “Don’t be. It was an accident.”

Gon ran over to them. “Okay, they’re gone! Let’s go home.”

“Alright then, it’s best we do before Mito gets worried.”

She kneeled down and brought to two into a hug, giving each a kiss on the forehead. “I’m so proud of you two.”

Killua closed his eyes contentedly, holding onto the back of her shirt and Gon giggled.

————————

(Name) waved to the two boys from the boat as she left whale island. “I’ll see you two in August! Be safe, boys!”

“We’ll miss you, (Name)!” Gon yelled as Killua waved to her shyly by his side.

The three made plans for them to stay at (Name)’s apartment to save money while they were in York New. It was a good idea, considering how expensive the housing could be there.

After their night of saving the cub, the two taught her about nen, though she still didn’t understand it. Apparently a teacher was supposed to come and train her soon.

(Name) began planning for their arrival as soon as she got home. She had two Hunter missions she needed to go on before September 1st, both simple body guarding jobs. After that, she’d have enough money to put a good amount into savings, and the rest could be used for rent and groceries.

Every day until September 1st, (Name) called Kurapika. He didn’t answer her calls, her texts, nothing. She was always left on delivered.

(Name) knew it was probably because he was busy with work, but she couldn’t help but worry for her dear friend.

‘I miss him…’

She held a hand over her heart, feeling it thump against her chest painfully. Her heart was aching, yearning for him. All (Name) wanted was to hear his voice again, to know he still thought about her.

That he still cared.

She set down her phone after calling him again, sighing. ‘It’s only one more week, then I’ll see him again. I’m sure he’s just been too busy with training and his new job…’

Ever the optimistic woman, (Name) continued working on getting her apartment ready for guests.

——————

(Name) yawned, waiting at the airport on an early August morning.

“(Name)!”

Yes again, Gon jumped onto (Name), this time she was waiting with open arms. He laughed as she spun him around, squeezing him out. “Hey, Gon!”

Killua walked up, scolding his friend for being so tough with her. “Killua!”

She pulled him into a hug, the boy relaxing. “It’s nice to see you again, (Name).”

She their hair before leading them to her van. “Let’s get going, we’ll drop your bags off at my place and then you two can explore to your hearts content.”

The two grabbed a snack from her fridge before leaving to do some research. “Be back before dinner time, okay? I promised your Aunt Mito that I’d take care of you, and that means not letting you two only eat junk food!”

“Yes, (Name)!”

They waved as they raced out of her apartment.

‘With those two’s appetites, I’ll have to go grocery shopping to have enough for dinner…’

(Name) pulled on her shoes on, leaving her key under the rug. She sent Killua a quick text before leaving.

(Name): Headed into town, if you two come back before I get home, my keys are under the rug! There’s snacks and drinks in the fridge!

Dandelion: thanks, (Name). Gon says be safe

She giggled to herself, placing her phone in her pocket.

Later that night, the two returned home grumpy, butting heads with each other as they entered the door.

“What happened with you two?” (Name) asked as she pulled off her apron. They relaxed slightly when the scent of dinner hit their noses.

“Killua lost all our money!”

“Hey, you gotta lose money to make money!”

(Name) sighed. “Boys, sit down. We can talk about it after dinner.”

They were quiet as they ate, (Name) smiling as they inhaled their food. It was obvious they were starving after running around the city all day.

“Okay, you two start talking and I’ll get the table cleaned up.”

They began explaining what happened, (Name) nodding along as she cleared the plates and started washing dishes. “Hmm, well I see both of your points. Killua did take a big risk and lost a lot of money, but Gon’s method was too slow and wouldn’t have made enough money by the time the auction started.”

She place a piece of cake in front of both of them. “You can think about what to do in the morning, rest and have some cake.”

Gon sighed, giving her a smile. “Sorry for troubling you, (Name).”

She shook her head. “Don’t be sorry. You’re my friends, I’ll do everything I can to help you accomplish your goals, Gon.”

After dessert, (Name) tucked the two into bed, glad she had a spare bedroom. “Goodnight, boys. My room is right down the hall if you need me.”

She smiled before closing the door behind her.

———————

A week passed by, September 1st finally arriving. (Name) woke up early, making a big breakfast and calling Kurapika yet again.

‘Still no answer…’

Now that was strange. They were supposed to be meeting September 1st, so it didn’t make sense for him not answer. ‘He… he’s probably still busy with his job.’

That excuse was getting harder to believe, but she shook the frown from her face and smiled. “Boys, breakfast is ready!”

The two came racing into the kitchen, making their plates before sitting at the table to eat. “Thanks, (Name)!”

As they finished their food, Gon looked up. “Are you coming with us today? Leorio supposed to be meeting us in the market.”

(Name) nodded, taking their cleared plates. “Yeah, give me 15 minutes to get dressed.”

She threw on a pair of jeans and a warm cardigan and followed the Gon and Killua to the market.

(Name) trailed behind the two as they walked, occasionally stopping at stalls to browse their wares. She wanted to get everyone a little gift to give them when they all met up. So far she had something for Gon and Leorio, only needing to shop for Kurapika and Killua.

She considered getting Kurapika more jewelry, after all he’d been incredibly happy with the earrings she’d gifted him, but decided against it. She didn’t want to give him a similar gift twice in a row, so it would have to be something else.

“A cellphone?”

“Yeah! Kurapika was planning on getting here yesterday, and Leorio will be meeting us here, so a cellphone will come in handy.”

(Name) perked up at Gon’s words, the girl drifting closer to listen.

“Kurapika said he has an assignment, so he might not have time to see us…”

She blinked. ‘He told Gon that but not… me?’

“An assignment?”

“Mhm. He said if he has free time he’ll call, and who knows when that could be. So that’s why I want a cellphone.”

Her heart sank at the thought of not being able to see Kurapika. She’d been so excited, and the thought of seeing him again had been the only reason she kept going at times. Gon sensed this, quickly waving his hands. “Oh, but I’m sure he’ll at least want to see you, (Name)! You know he has a soft spot for you!”

She sighed, ruffling the boys hair. “Yeah…”

She pushed her worry away, rubbing her arm as the salesman spoke.

“You want a deal? Here you go! This phone is the latest thing. It’s small, thin, and light and it comes with a GPS system to help you find your way around.”

“What do you think?” Killua asked Gon as he absentmindedly patted (Name)’s arm in an attempt to comfort her.

“Well, the price is right and it would fit in my pocket… yeah I think I’ll take it.”

“You don’t want that one.”

The three started to slowly turn around, (Name)’s eyes brimming with tears.

“You can’t roam with it and it’s not even waterproof. I’d go with this one over here if I were you.”

“Leorio!”

“Yo!”

(Name) jumped into his arms, the man spinning her around as they both laughed. “Leoriooo! I missed you!”

“Right back at you, sunshine.”

He kissed her forehead, causing her to break out into giggles. The two boys glanced at each other.

“Is it just me, or do they seem a lot closer now?” Killua whispered to Gon.

“Well, living together for nearly four months will do that.”

Leorio got them their phones, and began walking back to (Name)’s apartment. “Are you staying with me too, Leorio?”

“Nah, I got my own hotel. Don’t wanna make your apartment too crowded.”

“Aww, but I slept in your bed with you for months! I promise I don’t mind.”

Leorio blushed at that, the two boys laughing at his reaction. "Hey, don't say that in front of them."

"Why? It's not like we did anything."

She giggled, the taller man's face going red. "Hey!Quiet down.”

They say in (Name's apartment, using her computer to look up information as she prepared some snacks.

"Hey, sunshine, can you grab me a beer?"

"Coming up!”

Killua scoffed, flicking the man on the back of head.

"Why are you acting like she's your little housewife? You can get it yourself.”

"Hey! (Name), Killua is picking on me!"

'What is he, a kid?'

(Name) came back carrying a tray of snacks in her hands and a beer under her arm. "Here, Leorio." She set down the tray before kissing his cheek. "Find anything yet?"

He sighed, cheeks turning pink. "A few things."

‘What the hell is their relationship!?' Killua thought, eyebrow twitching.

Before the three left to start a conditional auctioning, (Name) stopped Leorio.

“Has…”

She held onto his sleeve, staring down at the floor. “Has Pika talked to you recently?”

Leorio raised an eyebrow. “Yeah, a few days ago he informed me he had a new job. Has he not been in contact with you?”

(Name) seemed to deflate slightly. “He… hasn’t talked to me in a month…”

This seemed to genuinely surprise Leorio, the man taking a step back. “What?! A month? But the two of you were calling every day, even falling asleep on the phone together!”

She groaned. “I know! It’s so weird. I’ve been telling myself it’s because he’s just busy but…”

Now it was hard to hang onto that excuse. “Hey, I’m sure there’s some reason he hasn’t called. To be fair, he’s only texted me a handful of times this month.”

She nodded slowly, looking up. “Yeah…”

Gon held her hand. “I’m sure he wouldn’t ignore you on purpose. Kurapika cares about you a whole lot! There has to be a reason! I bet his new job has been suuuper time consuming!”

“Yeah!”

(Name) smiled, the boy grinning back. “There we are! I love your smile, (Name)!”

She giggled, ruffling his hair. “You little charmer. You boys go on, I’ll have dinner ready when you all get back.”

She waved them off and closed the door behind them.

“Oh, Pika…”

She sank to the floor, holding her phone in her hand. Her finger hovered over the call button, but before she could call him again, she stopped.

‘He won’t answer, anyway.’ she thought bitterly, picking herself up.

(Name) brushed her pants off before lightly smacking her cheeks. ‘I can’t think like that. I gotta trust him. He said he’d always be there for me! I just have to… I just have to believe in him!’

She grabbed her purse, throwing it over her shoulder before running out the front door. ��I’ll get some grocery shopping done. Maybe I’ll even find presents for them!’

——————

(Name) finished her shopping, having secured a gift for both Kurapika and Killua. She hummed to herself, glancing down at her grocery list.

“Need more celery, milk, eggs… ouch!”

(Name) tumbled to the ground, quickly gathering her things. “Watch it, girl.”

(Name) looked up to see a man glaring daggers at her. This didn’t bother her, though. No, (Name) jumped up and began frantically checking over the stranger. “Oh my gosh, I’m so sorry! Are you okay? I wasn’t paying attention. Did you get hurt? I have bandaids in my ba-“

The man stepped out of her way before he continued walking. “Tch, annoying.”

She blinked, crouching back down to pick up the rest of her things when she spotted it.

A wallet. There was nothing to identify the man with inside of it, only a few unmarked bills and a picture of a group of children. She tilted her head. “Sir, sir you dropped your-“

But he was gone. (Name) smacked a hand over her forehead. ‘Maybe I’ll bump into him again. Can’t leave it here…’

She stuffed the wallet into her backpack, sighing. (Name) pouted at her scraped elbow, taking out a bandaid and slapping it onto her wound before walking away.

As the sun began to set, (Name) started cooking dinner. The boys would be out late, meaning she could really take her time.

After hours of arm wrestling, Gon walked into her apartment, the other two trailing behind him.

“Just in time, dinner is ready!”

Leorio nodded sleepily, sitting down at the kitchen table to eat dinner. “Leorio, why don’t you stay here tonight? York New is dangerous during the day, it’s suicide to be walking around at night.”

Leorio munched on his dinner as he thought this over. “Alright. Hope your bed is big enough for the both us of.”

“Probably!”

——————

(Name) attempted to untangle herself from her tall friend the next morning, whining. “Leorio, gotta pee!”

“Five more minutes…”

He turned over, pulling her along with him. ‘Now I remember why I moved.’

“KILLUA! GON!”

The two came rushing in, Gon slipping and falling on Leorio’s pants he’d thrown off in the middle of the night. “You pervert, I should have known!”

Killua bonked him on the head, pulling him off the bed and throwing him at the hall. “Woah- MY BACK!”

(Name) was too busy wobbling to the bathroom to notice the two laying into the taller man, rubbing her sleepy eyes.

When she got back, she had to separate the three as they rolled on the floor. “Okay, okay, let him go.”

The four ate breakfast in silence, poor Leorio having a swollen cheek and several bruises. “Sorry, Leorio. You kind of have a reputation…”

Leorio sighed. “It’s alright. You two coming to protect (Name) like that is what you should do.”

But Leorio still tripped Killua when they walked out the door that morning, muttering something about payback. “Don’t wait up on us, sunshine. We’ll be out until the early morning.”

(Name) lingered by the door. “Are you sure you don’t want me to pack you some lunches, then? I-“

He silenced her with a peck on the forehead. “You’re too sweet. You just sit nice and pretty, and I’ll bring you home something nice, alright?”

(Name) felt her face heat up at his words, and to get him back, she fluttered her eyelashes at him. “Leorio, baby, not in front of the kids…”

He attempted to stutter out a response, only for his tongue to be tied. (Name) laughed and pushed him out of the door. “Byee! Don’t get into too much trouble!”

The entire day was spent doing chores, cleaning the house, making premade meals, and standing around waiting for Kurapika to call.

“Hmm…”

She stared at her phone that sat on the table, tilting her head one way then the other. “Hmmmmm…… okay I’m going to call him again.”

Ring…

Ring…

Ring…

“You gonna answer that?”

Kurapika didn’t answer the brute in front of him, only glancing at his phone to see (Name)’s smiling contact photo lighting up the screen. His heart thumped against his chest for just a moment before he steadied himself.

“Where do you want to die?”

“Some place where we won’t cause a disturbance, because you’ll be making a lot of noise when I kill you.”

Uvogin allowed the blonde to leave and grab something.

A shovel, but not just any shovel.

Kurapika stood in front of the storing shed in the back of (Name)’s apartment building. He glanced up to her window, a faint smile on his face when he spotted her silhouette twirling around in what he assumed was her kitchen.

‘That’s how it should be. Her unaware and happy while I carry this heavy burden.’

He put in the combination to the lock around the shed, remembering she told him it was her birthday 2 months ago.

‘Still the same combination? That’s not safe…’

He scolded himself for thinking this. ‘I shouldn’t care, I have more important things to worry about.’

Kurapika searched the shed until he spotted what he was after. ‘There it is…’

It wasn’t perfect, but would do in this situation. It was a large snow shovel, one she’d bought when she moved to York New and found out the snow was heavy in the winter. He didn’t have the heart to tell her at the time that the snow was shoveled by volunteers, meaning it would be useless to her.

But now it would be useful to him.

Kurapika closed the shed and carefully clicked the lock closed, attempting to make it seem like it hadn’t been open in the first.

——————

Kurapika shoveled dirt onto Uvogin’s corpse, eye blank. He glanced down at his dear friends snow shovel, only feeling slightly guilty as the evident dents in the metal.

‘She would forgive me. She always does.’

He made the long journey back to York New, slipping into the back of (Name)’s apartment building. Gone was the careful Kurapika who had been there a few hours before, now he shoved the dirty, bloody shovel into the shed, kicking the door when it caught on the ground.

He didn’t even both to make it seem like it hadn’t been tampered with, he was much too tired, much too emotionally and physically spent to care.

Kurapika lingered near (Name)’s apartment, feeling his legs nearly buckle as he attempted to walk away.

‘Have to… have to go. Can’t stay or…’

He’d subconsciously arrived at her doorstep, hand already reaching out to knock. Before he could stop himself, he knocked on the door twice.

“Be there in a second!”

His lip trembled at the sound of her voice. More than anything, he wanted to be with her right now. Kurapika had just gone through so much, he’d taken his first life.

The door opened slowly, and he pushed himself in, collapsing in her arms. “P-Pika?”

(Name) wasn’t sure how to feel in the moment. Her Pika had returned to her, but not in the way she had expected.

He was covered in blood, face pale and dirty. His clothes were torn, and she wasn’t sure what he’d been through.

“Pika? Are you hurt anywhere?”

Kurapika shook his head slowly, his grip on her tightening when she attempted to set him down. “Okay, okay… let’s try breathing in and out, okay?”

She sat down on the floor, allowing him to bury his head into her shoulder as he caught his breath. It was like standing on his own was impossible then, and he needed her support.

“Alright… there you go.”

She brushed his hair back to get a good look at his face. His eyes were a faint red, face covered in dirt and dried blood. She cupped his cheek, not caring a single bit about the mess collecting on her hand.

“Pika… what can I do? Do you want to talk about it?”

He shook his head, leaning into her touch. “Okay… let’s try some yes or no questions. Shake your head for no, nod for yes.”

He patiently waited for her to continue, eyes fluttering closed. “Do you want to take a bath?”

He nodded, head leaning forward to nuzzle against her shoulder. Although the circumstances weren’t perfect, it still felt nice to have her Pika with her again, especially when he was pulling her closer to him. It reminded her of the Hunter Exam, when they never went long without another.

“Okay, let’s get to the bathroom sweetheart.”

She struggled under his weight as she guided him to the bathroom. He didn’t talk the entire time, silent as she set him on the edge of the tub.

(Name) drew him a bath, occasionally having to struggle out of his grip. He kept a hand on her shirt the entire time, and when she strayed too far he pulled her into his arms, whimpering against her hair. “Pika, I’m not leaving, I’m just grabbing a towel…”

After his bath was ready, she attempted to walk out of the bathroom to give him some privacy.

“Pikaa…”

He was stopping her from leaving again, pulling her back by her hips. “Pika, what do you want?”

He gave her no answer, only pawing at her form like a sad puppy. Thinking he just wanted her near, she turned her head so he could get undressed. After five minutes, she turned to see he hadn’t made any moves to undress at all.

She shook her head in exasperation. “Okay, lift up your arms.”

He did so without question, (Name) pulling his shirt and undershirt off of him. When she moved to hook her thumbs under his pants, it was like he snapped awake from a dream.

Kuraoika shooed her hands away, face a light pink. She raised an eyebrow, then turned around so he could get undressed and sink into the warm water.

She turned back around and sighed. He was just sitting, knees pulled to his chest. “Pika…”

She sat at the edge of the tub, using a cup to wet his hair. Again, he leaned against her, soaking her shirt. “Aww, Pika…”

(Name) didn’t mind that much, though. She knew he wasn’t in the best headspace right now, and wanted to do whatever she could to help.

She washed his hair, giggling when he smiled at the feeling of her fingers massaging soap into his scalp. “That feel nice, Pika?”

He nodded against her, attempting to nuzzle into her soft tummy against but she pushed him back a little. “Hey, mister, you’re still wet. Wait until after your bath!”

He grumbled at that, but listened. She washed his upper half as much as possible, looking away as she washed his chest.

“Okay, Pika. I’m not going any further than that, you’ll have to take over sweetheart.”

She grabbed his hand and placed the rag in it. He stared at the rag, unmoving.

“Pika.”

“…”

“Pika you’ve gotta wash yourself.”

“…”

She took in a deep breath, pinching the bridge of her nose. “I love you, so much. So much.”

She grabbed the rag and turned her head as she washed his legs, the blonde lifting his leg slightly. (Name) wanted to laugh. Usually Kurapika was very independent and easily embarrassed, but now he was completely naked, allowing her to see him at his most vulnerable and leaning into her touch.

But she didn’t laugh. That wouldn’t be right in her mind. Her friend had been through something traumatizing enough to the point he had gone nonverbal. And she couldn’t laugh at that.

“Okay, Pika, you’re all clean.”

She drained the tub, wrapping a fluffy towel around his form and helping him out of the tub. “Come on, let’s get you to bed.”

She sat him down, the blonde yet again attempting to pull her into his embrace again. “Pika, no! I’ve gotta get you some clothes, okay?”

The blonde tugged at her sleeve, looking up at her with watery eyes. “Pika…”

She cupped his cheeks, leaning down to peck his lips. “It’s just for a second, Pika. I’ll be right back.”

He seemed to melt under her touch, eyes fluttering shut as she planted kisses all over his face. “That better?”

He nodded, nuzzling against her palm. “Okay. I’ll give you more kisses in just a minute, just let me go.”

Kurapika considered this, glancing between her and the door before letting her go. (Name) made true on her word, returning only a minute later carrying a pair of pajama pants and a tshirt. “Sorry, it’s Leorio’s clothes, b-“

Kurapika seemed visibly disgusted when she attempted to dress him. He pushed the shirt away, shaking his head. “What… what’s wrong? These are the only clothes that’ll fit you, sweetheart.”

He kept pushing and shaking his head until (Name) sighed. “Well, I guess you can wear my clothes…”

He went still at this, relaxing when she walked over to her closet and pulled out some pajamas again. It was the ugliest t-shirt she owned. It had a screaming possum on the front, the text saying ‘LETS EAT TRASH AND GET HIT BY A CAR” in bright red comic sans font, along with a pair of hello kitty pajama pants.

This time he offered no resistance when she asked him to raise his arms. She slipped the shirt onto him, wincing at the sight of his thin frame. ‘He lost weight…’

He was able to put his pants on himself, following behind her like a lost puppy when she walked into the kitchen. She sat him down and took out one of the premade meals she made that day. ‘I’m so glad I made these…’

She heated it up, watching as Kurapika swayed at the table. He was exhausted, she needed to hurry so he didn’t pass out at her dinner table.

“Here, Pika, it’s hot.”

She set the plate of food in front of him, scolding herself. ‘Of course he can’t feed himself.’

“I’ve got it, sweetheart.”

She blew on a spoonful of food before bringing it to his lips. He took a bite, perking up a little. She continued, but apparently was too slow, because the blonde snatched the spoon from her hand and began to shovel his meal into his mouth.

“Woah, slow down, you’re gonna choke.”

He didn’t listen. Kurapika had trouble eating recently. Nothing tasted good, everything bland after he decided to cut his beloved (Name) out of his life, but right now the food in front of him tasted like heaven.

He finished his plate, sipping on the drink she’d offered him moments before. After that, he rubbed at his eyes, swaying again.

“Sleepy?”

He nodded slowly, allowing her to guide him to her bedroom. “Let’s get you tucked in.”

She tucked him into one side of her bed, making sure he was comfortable before climbing into the other side. “Goodnight, Pika.”

He said nothing as he scooted closer to her, burying his face in her chest. She sighed, running her fingers through his pretty blonde hair.

“Thank you…”

It was so quiet that (Name) wasn’t sure she’d heard anything at all, but he continued to mutter thanks and apologies against her shirt. “Sorry… so sorry, (Name).”

“What are you sorry for, Pika? You didn’t do anything wrong?”

He didn’t answer her, and when she felt her shirt grow wet with tears, she could only sigh. “I love you, Pika. You’re not a burden to me at all, so don’t apologize for this.”

If only she knew that he was apologizing for who he’s become in the future, what he’d do to her to further his cause. Maybe she would have been less forgiving.

Just maybe.

(Name) kissed the top of his head, beginning to him as he clung to her. His body wracked with sobs, his hands clawing at her back as he broke down. “Please… please… don’t hate me, (Name). Please…”

She was quiet, not knowing how to respond. (Name) could never hate him. In the morning, she could attempt to ease his fears, let him know just how much he meant to her.

“Shh, shh…” she cooed, giving him kisses all over his face. He accepted those kisses, sighing in contentment. Kurapika peered up at her with those pretty brown eyes, leaning into her touch.

“Lets rest, okay?”

He didn’t want to rest. In the morning, he would become a stranger to her, but his heavy eyelids wouldn’t allow him to stay awake. “… okay…”

She pulled him into her embrace, the feeling of her warm hands on his back allowing him to relax and sleep.

——————

Kurapika pulled on his clothes, glancing at the sleeping girl with half lidded eyes.

He bent down, brushing her hair out of her face so he could take a good look at her sleeping face. ‘So pretty…’

Kurapika stared at her for a while, feeling himself being drawn towards her. He shook his head, pressing a lingering kiss to her forehand before standing up.

“Goodbye, (Name). I wish you the best, truly.”

He lingered in the doorway, glancing down to the shirt he discarded on the floor, the one she dressed him in the night before.

‘She won’t miss this…’

He picked it up, placing it in his satchel before pulling on his tabard. He looked over himself in the mirror. Thanks to her help, he looked… passable. Clean, but nothing would help in hiding the dark circles under his eyes and slight hollowness in his cheeks.

Kurapika spared her one last glance before leaving her apartment.

‘I’ll miss you, angel.’

#perv!kurapika #fixer upper kurapika x reader #x reader #anime x reader #headcanon #requests open #reader insert #hxh x reader #hxh imagines #smut requests #hunter x hunter x reader #hunter x hunter headcanons #hxh kurapika #gon hxh #hxh killua #hxh leorio #kurapika hxh #kurapika x reader #kurapika headcanons #kurapika hunter x hunter #kurapika #kurapika x y/n #hxh #anime x chubby reader #chubby!reader #chubby reader #fem!reader #female reader #fem reader #hunter x hunter

[punchratt]

Indulging in my brainrot again, heres that longer bg3 character design post i was talking about! (@dragonageshitpostingelves, i didnt forget you <3) Also, Spoiler Warning, i talk a lot about the companions backstory and quests, so don't read if you haven't finished those. Or do, I don't care.

Im gonna be honest and admit right now that I am sadly NOT a professional character designer, but instead just a nerd who likes to draw. I think the bg3 designs are amazing as they are and deserve a hell of a lot more praise then their already getting. That being said, i have many opinions about these funny little tadpole people. The first of them being that Gale, Wyll, and Astarion should not look like that. I mean, they all literally have the same body model, just give or take few scars and some hair, then swap the head. Which i think is a little shocking considering that the girls have much more diverse body types. Normally its the other way around.

First, Astarion. I love him, but i should not be able to grate cheese on his abs. Dude was a slave surviving off rats and living in the shadows for over 200 years, he's a rouge with 8 strength and no work out plan other then squatting so he can hide better. The last thing he should have is a six pack. I am a firm believer in scrawny Astarion, that man is wet noodle, he is malnourished and it should show. I should be able to see that mans ribs. Play that boy like a xylophone. This twink is not twinking right now and its driving me insane!

Im not saying he cant be sexy, in fact i think its very important that he is sexy. A big chunk of his story has to do with his relationship with sex and how he views romance as a whole. The whole point of his story is that he seems like the sexy vampier stereotype, but is actually a much more in depth character with a very complicated relationship to sex and romance. He needs to look sexy for that to work. But you don't gotta have a six pack to look sexy! Whenever i see him without a shirt all i can think of is that abs just don't look right on him. Everything else i think they've gotten perfect, he really does look like the character he's supposed to be and i can only applaud Larian for getting it so right, just.. lose the abs.

Second, Gale. I feel like I've already summed up how i feel about his design in my last post, but i like talking so i'm gonna say more! Gale should be chubby!! All he likes to do is ponder his orb, talk to his cat, and study magic. I firmly believe that he also has a side passion for food. After all, what is cooking if not potion brewing but different? Gale can appreciate a good meal and it should show! After all, eating and food is integral to his character with the whole arcane hunger thing he has going on. Give me my dad bod Gale and all wrongs in this world will be righted.

But to be a little more serious about this, i think his story becomes all the more poetic and tragic if you view him as someone who loves food. Because just imagine that you have three things you love, magic, food, and your goddess girlfriend. Now imagine that one day, to impress your goddess girlfriend, you do something kinda really stupid and end up with a magic nuke in your chest. But wait, it gets worse! Because of this failed grand gesture your goddess girlfriend breaks up with and banishes you. She leaves you to deal with this whole thing by yourself, all you have now is your cat and cooking. But wait, it gets even worse!! No matter how much you eat, yu arent ful, so you're constantly starvinng now, and thats how you find out that the bomb in your chest feeds on magic! Which means that now Gale has to ether find a way to keep it fed or he's gonna kamikaze half the swords coast. Meaning he has to eat any magical artifacts he gets his hands on while also dealing with the emotional damage of everything else. Food, one of the only things he had left, is now a stressful reminder of the fucked up situation he's in.

Now I don't think that means Gale starts to hate food, or resent it in some way, I still think he's the adorable little foodie goofball dork who insisted on being the camp cook. But i do think it makes his whole relationship with food something much more bittersweet, which is very interesting and something i feel could be reflected better in his already amazing design.

Third, Wyll. Wyll, I believe, is the most likely to be buff out of these three. Though, I don't think he'd show it as much as he does. We know he likes to dance, and that he enjoys a good sword fight more then anything! He used to fence with his father and overall is a very active guy. He is probably the character that most matches his body, there aren't many things I'd change. That being said, he is still a warlock with less strength then a hamster. He wouldn't be that muscly.

My dude is the son of a Grand Duke, he's had a relatively cushy life that didnt really get all that much harder after his dad gave him the boot (dick move btw). He's struggled, defiantly! But i don't think it'd be a reach to say that Wyll might have a little fat on him. I dont really have much to say other then i think he'd benefit from taking those abs away and putting that bulk somewhere else. When I imagine Wyll I imagine a man with some arm game and a pudgy belly. Maybe some calf muscle too, but overall nothing too defined since he doesn't really use strength in combat. I mean, why does Wyll have more defined abs then Lae'zel? Of all the origin characters she should have the most defined abs of the group. Not these three clowns(affectionate).

Wyll is a softie with a heart of gold, he should get to have a soft body to go with it. Plus it'd add more contrast between what parts are devil and what aren't. Sharp rough horns, a scarred face, and striking but intimidating eyes juxtaposed against a soft but somewhat built frame, quick whit, and a generally nice attitude make for a very interesting design! One that i think would be much more compelling then the kinda default muscly hero build he has now.

Now compare those to the secrete fourth option i didnt tell you about! Halsin! I think Halsin is designed perfectly and there is nothing i would change. He uses a unique body model from the other three and his design perfectly captures who he is as a character. He's big, appropriately buff, and looks kind. I look at that man and i think "yeah, thats a guy who occasionally turns into a bear", and he does! He looks like a natural born leader who knows how to make those tough decisions, he looks as inviting as he acts, and he looks like he gives amazing hugs. Bear hugs if you will! That man is a bear in every sense of the word, and whats more druid then that?

I only really brought him up to set him as sort of a standard for the designs of this game, because almost every single design is just as perfect and well thought out as his. I could go on for several more paragraphs about other characters and why their also perfect, or what other small little changes id make to their designs (cough cough, Lae'zel abs, cough) but this thing is getting long enough as is.

So to conclude. Fuck abs, and get them off my boys! If you've actually read this whole monstrosity, thank you. It took me over half a day to write and i still feel like i haven't touched on everything. Like, i didn't get to praise their designs nearly as much as i wanted to, but oh well. Maybe I'll make another post about the girls, maybe ill ramble about what i do like about the boys designs, i don't know. Depends on if anyone wants that, or if i still got gas left in the tank after this. Finally, please excuse any spelling errors and the inconsistent capitals. Its late, i have dyslexia, and i'll probably go back and fix it later. Thanks again for reading!

#rattrambles #bg3 #baldurs gate 3 #gale dekarios #gale of waterdeep #astarion #wyll ravengard #halsin

[rockintapper]

the um

ok so basically i say whar i think about rhythm heavem chatacters. starting with Tengoku brcuase why nawt

readmore ebcuase this posr long as hell!!!!! please work this time

uh

karate joe: hi kasper the he <3 i wana hug him,

hair vegetables: what Thr fcuk

sarge: idk. attention march

squadmates: petar

air batter AIRBATTERR 💕💞💕💞💕💕💞💕💞💕💕💞💕💞💕💞💞💕💞

space umpire: perpetual smiler

the clappy trio: your sequel stinks!!!! /sillay i love your wigs

sneaky spirits: get bow and arrow'd l plud ratio /j

samurai steve: hes really cool actual6 #chilling

yokai (the thingies the samurai slices): pe uliar little cratures. up to no good

rats: thr cheese

ms. whiskers: THE FIRST CAT EVER!!!!!!!!!!!

sick beats doctor/dr. cutlery: hes vibing ong. why do you hsve an endless game

thr viruses: leav that litlle guy alone >:(!!!!!!!

yellow organism (sick beats): little guye :) dj yelo

the donpans: theyre all dating your honor

yagura-chan: spiteful luttle child i love her. may she grow up and pan

mahou tsukai: hi rocket The WIZARB!!!! magic autism

ojou-chan: flowers autism

the monster (wizard's waltz): STOP EATING MY PLANTS

pengiuns (showtime): yhe dillays i love them they deerve the worl

monkey (showtime): i just read about him. gonna make him explode now

rabbit: boing boing boing boing boing b

tram and pauline/poline: hi cheese THE FOXES the foxes ever hth foxes ever the

space gramps: i widh he was my grangpa 💔 /j

space dancers: pa-pa-pa-PUNCH! put some respect on my boys plea

q maou: AAGH. AAH. AAHHG. AG

contestant: hi 56 hes. hes jist like me frfr /hj

play-yan: hi sunny i really liek. his uh level. minigame. wharever it s called its like. really calming. unless im Going for a Perfect!

mini chounin (power caligraphy): the dancing dancers

akai mono (polyrhythm): i uh. i dont have anything about these thangs. what

RAPMEN: YO. SANJI DESUKA

urakata aki to ki (bouncy road): my children. i love them. i would Kill for th

spheroids (bouncy road): you have a page? on the rh wiki? what?

ninja and the lord (ninja no shison/ninja bodyguard): augh

toss boys: hi ninety The toss bous. they hehheeh3he hugs ao-kun

yuka: YIPPR YIPEEE YIPEE YIPEEEE YIPEEEOEIRIRJ HI T YUKAIEJEBE ^_^ totally isnt dating a tall tapper shes totally not dating a tall ta /lie

giraffe: dont fucking look at me like that

tanaka (ninja reincarnate): AAHHHHHAHAHAEHRHDSHSHEHD /VPOS I LOVE HIM IDK WHERE THIS LOVE FOR HIM CAME FROM BUT I LOVR HIM

kanojo: ypure in good hands. mostly. (cant get the fast part of ninja reincarnate)

waru mono (ninja reincarnate): w,,ario?? w

soshiSOSHIIIIIIII SSOHIIIIII SOSIIOOII SOSHIII EOSBSISI SHSOHSHSIJSSOSHUSII SHSOOSIUSHISJS SOOHSIIII SOSHIII SSOSHISJEOWSHIWJEOWJWJSJSSJEJESK SOSHSISB SSOSHHS

cosmic girl: Rude™ (/hc). may also be the commander in amrching oerders 2,

cosmic dancers: space dancers HATE THEM! /silly

TH RAPP WOEMNEKENENNE kan sbejebdjeTHR RPA WOMRN THEJEBR YURIIIIIIIII JRIIII YUEIII YUIII!!! YHRIIII hi cheese

MAN-K: mN i lovr him hes so cool dud e whaha

biribiriuo (night walk 2): STOP ELECTROCUTING PLAY YAN 💔💔💔💔

usamimi maki sensei: i love the face she makes whe n i press a button too earlu/late. may also be cosmic girl

space rabbits: ive seen you in waroiware.... pets yu

buta-san (tengoku remix 7): pigy :]

barista: i hc his voice is jasmine wright's from the rh iceberg

people at the café: only (canon) black person in the entire series helooo

neko machine: meow. meow. meow.meow owah owah mah? mah? o-mah? m

honse machien: wha,

love-san: suki (cheering)

mr. upbeat: hi tomano tucking him in giving him a goodnight kiss and a glass of milk <3

mannequin; i wonder what game yoyll be in the futue

anata: hi 56 i love his goofy ass smile go girl give us everything

drum girls: wait whered they come fro

samurai drummer: no way. it Tsunk

samurai drummer's band: i did not know you existed hello??

oba-chan: protect. protect. protect.

pwner: Kill. Kill. Kill Kill. Kill. Kill. Ki

producer: who tf are you? what? wait lemme rrad about yo7 furst

im back. music autism

ok thats all the characters in rhythm tengok!!! thanks for Did yiu read all of tjis? zamn!! congrats dude /gn

#long post #rhythm tengoku #rhythm heaven

[cold-heart-warm-writings]

Taking the Host Club to a Chuck E Cheese

AN: I just watched John Oliver do a special on Chuck E Cheese , it was HILARIOUS, and *boom* inspiration. Also, I’m only imagining the Chuck E Cheese from MY childhood, late 90′s early 2000′s. 

Haruhi: “Is this food even edible?” Haruhi would be annoyed that you wasted her afternoon that she had planned to get caught up on house chores. Even when you or the Host Club offered to pay for everything, she was still not impressed. She played a few of the arcade games, and eventually revealed the last time she had been to a Chuck E Cheese was when a kid in her class had a birthday party at one. She and her parents all went, and she remembered having a good time. Haruhi was somehow given everyone’s tickets. She picked out a stuffed animal for a neighbor kid who recently broke his arm. She would not go back again nor recommend.

Kaoru: He snuck backstage and somehow managed to get the animatronics to sing songs not appropriate for children. He also spent a ridiculous amount of time taking pictures and making memes to send in his, Hikaru’s, and Haruhi’s group chat. He would not go back again nor recommend.

Honey: Honey enjoyed manipulating the staff members into thinking he was a kid so he could get away with being a little shit. He snuck extra food (that Mori took away), he cheated at games, ran through the climbing playground and knocked kids over, and boo-ed the robots Kaoru messed with. All of Honey’s rat knowledge comes from Ratatouille and Chuck E Cheese.  He would not go back again nor recommend.

Hikaru: He paid the kid in the Chuck E Cheese costume 2 weeks’ worth of salary to borrow the costume. Hikaru almost backed out after smelling it, but knew the prank would be worth it. Spent the next two hours terrorizing small children, and chasing them around. He was disappointed when he discovered that his amount of terrorizing the children was actually less than what the restaurant actually manages to do simply by existing. He would not go back again nor recommend.

Mori: A nervous wreck. The eyes of the robots are following him, and he is not a fan. Mori also kept on losing Honey, and he was stressed Honey was going to get lost in the rat palace. Plus, the person in the rat costume freaked him out. This image of Chuck gave him nightmares. He would not go back again nor recommend.

Kyoya: Would NOT go in. Are you kidding me? He would look the place up, see THIS picture, or any picture to be honest, and not even deign you with a response. He is a rich boy, and you want him to eat food cooked and served by a RAT? Hell no. Plus, there would be so many goddamn running and screaming children. Absolutely not. He would make your broke ass pay for his therapy bills having to experience this child’s rat casino. He would not go back again nor recommend.

Tamaki: One of the said running and screaming children. He would be pulling everyone all around, challenging them to games, trying to win prizes, absolutely determined to win whatever the latest grand prize was, even though he could probably just go to the store and buy 100 of them. Whoever is chaperoning him, please don’t let him eat the pizza. Anything prepackaged is fine, but nothing that is “cooked” at the establishment. He would not go back again nor recommend.

#is ratatouilee/reme even a rat #arent they mice #idk #ohshc #ouran #ouran host club #ouran high school host club #haruhi #haruhi fujioka #kaoru hitachiin #Mitskuni Haninozuka #hikaru hitachiin #takashi morinozuka #Kyoya #Kyoya Ootori #tamaki #tamaki suoh #the pictures i found arent even that bad of ones but i got tired of looking whelp

[walnutcookie]

tell me your headcanons for mac n cheese and cheddar RIGHT NOW!! /nf /silly

HI THANK U SO MUCH FOR THIS ASK AGSJDBDKFBSKRB /GEN THIS MAKESME SO HAPPY ,,,,

i think that if i were to go in depth about my headcanons and lore for them this post would be a bit long so heres some of the simpler ones X]

links lead to drawings ive made relating to my headcanons 👍

Cheddar Cheese

• cheddar is very. VERY tall. like 6'9" (funny number). Makes it worse because sometimes they like to wear heels

• uses all pronouns but mainly they/them :3 male/female honorifics

• a lesbian. Question mark ? still debating

• rogueforts cousin!!! Survived the blue cheese manor fire (which happened when it was just a teen)

• related to above if you know anything about my roguefort lore they grew up in a Not so great rich snobby family!! they were buxton blue cheeses child which makes cheesecake their sister as well. Dont ask where the accent came from let me have this JZVDKFBDK

• intersex and bigender - when growing up they were forced to fit into either "boy" or "girl" and didnt exactly fit either stereotype biologically or through their behavior so their parents were very frustrated with them. Turns out theyre both!!!

• it started as a joke because of ratatouille but. i am a firm believer in ratmouse cheddar. are they a rat? is he a mouse? both? Neither? no matter what they hide ears under their hat and paws under her gloves and a rat tail under their coat because i think its fun💥💥they should have rat/mouse features as a treat

• they have legs that are way too thin and not at all proportinate to tjeir body. i cannot stand drawing them because of this.

• resting :3 face

• very much cursed (it would take a few posts to explain this one)

• whatever this is

Macaroni

• shorter than cheddar but still on the taller side!! 5'11"

• uses he/him pronouns but he doesnt really care what pronouns are used on him. fem honorifics or anything he doesnt mind that either

• amab and genderfae :] (basically genderfluid without the masc part of the spectrum)

• lesbian

• older sister of my oc maccy cheese cookie (who was made before mac and cheddar were introduced HXBFJ). macaroni is 6 years older than them

• parents just Straight up abandoned him and his sibling as kids!! i could explain this one further but probably in another post

• it may be hard to believe but he is older than cheddar

• CANNOT STAND unsolved mysteries. having unsolved cases or puzzles makes him physically ill and he cant stand to eat or sleep when he doesnt know the solution

• related to above he despises cliffhangers and surprises and if he cant read a mystery novel in one full sitting it will EAT HIM ALIVE

• also related. Loves math! fun little puzzles that (almost) always have one logical solution. he does NOT however like math problems with multiple/no solutions

• easily startled by sudden loud noises or actions

• a lil chubby!!

• he has a little macaroni tail. sorry

as for my mac n cheese (ship) headcanons,, i cant explain them very well without context to my Full lore for the two but heres my attempt HVDKFB

• started as INCREDIBLY one sided (cheddar had romantic feelings for mac while mac had feelings of. Hatred)

• cheddar is incredibly easy to fluster because shes not used to being on the Recieving end of affection (cough cough for curse reasons cough)

• cheddar is also incredibly touch starved (cough cough for curse reasons cough)

• macaroni can just. Use cheddar as a bed. they are so fucking tall and wide he can just snooze on them

• they are so doomed toxictragic yuricore im going to kill them

YAAY thats all ill do for now but if anyone has any further questions i would love to answer

rbs ok!!!

#aaa idk if i wanna main tag #but #yeagh!!! #🎉 asks #🎉 rambles #universe a au

[cryptidfagswag]

Band is over for the year and I'm sad, here are all of the quotes I've gathered from it (long) (very long) (contains sex jokes)

I've got myelin on my jeez-o-pete

Ohp- that's not how you put pants on

Great sound! but the battery died :(

Low brass, can you count to six?

Who won the race? not the band

Let's go swimming, no I might die

You're just eating flour now. Mmmm delicious, I'm choking

Why are you thinking about his cock? Thats not very "I like women'' of you

You do everything he says, he's got this big ass knife

Shit me, fuck me, stick me in a can

You're good with that?

I mean, yeah, I know how to use an elevator-

*carrying chimes up the stairs,*

Don't mind me, just a fairy

Festive, super festive, like Santa threw up

They will not be held responsible unless they stab you directly with a sea urchin

What kind of pie?

Pie!!!

Put your bongos away Noah, you delinquent

Nah I like my men with nice tits

Can you feel it, the rays of sunshine, joy, fear

Hey, it's kinda hot up here. It's not really, I just want you to take off your clothes

Anyone want…plugs

If you can suck a mouthpiece, you can suck a dick

That shits gonna kill you

That's the point

Chicken pot?

Pie!!!

Causes microwave issues

C'mon, fuck me in the ass. With a condom, don't forget that part

How are you today

Pretty fucking horny

See, now I know you're gonna hide

But you don't know where

I'm sticking my penis places it shouldn't be. Like the meat grinder. I'm making sauce, making it saucy

Let's play happy!

Oh, I am not happy anymore

Industry baby!

Everybody just started sobbing, you cannot think this is a good idea

He took, no, he took his skin and fed it to his family, he's a good luck charm

When I die, I wanna get cremated and put into a blunt

Ah, fuck me

Was that an invitation?

Was that an offer?

Contrary to popular belief, I am in fact a bottom

Murder hornets all over those clarinets

Sweet Caroline, fuck my ass

There's nothing inspiring about your digga-digga-dahts

Oboe- gods gift to the woodwind section

It's not a gift, it's a a hazard

Oboe, more like oh no

I just burped on the snare

What the fuck-

Just thought I’d let you boys know

Look, a Lowe's! We're gonna build a wall!

Poom poom

Beacon no, we promised we'd stop

I'm the recessive trait hiding in your phenotypes

I'd make out with you in a Denny's parking lot, and I'd suck your dick outside and IHOP

Do you have a shitty pancake restaurant kink?

Ok no, if you got a worm, and fried it in cheese, it would be exactly like a cheeto

Honestly I would eat a worm raw

Ohp you're too tall, I decapitated you

Friends, colleagues, fucking rat bastards

He dropped his euphonium on my tuba once. Well, not my tuba, if it was my tuba I would've murdered him.

We need an instrument. Aha! So, a clarinetist walks into a bar- no-

Where did you even get that?

Theft? I don't know

Babies aren't supposed to be that cute, they're like, all mushy. There's too much skin and not enough surface area

The guy with the bottle of rocks looked like he was having fun

Silas is in the shit container

Honestly I'm just really tired and really horny

A balloon fetish, like, do you stick your penis in a balloon

Dude if a worm looks at me, I will cry for like, two hours

Dad, where do babies come from? Mmm storks

I could fight someone with my cheeks and win

Do you need lungs to play the trumpet? No

Sorry I can't come to band today, my pigs are giving birth

I'm straight but I too would offer my hole to him

Wyatt put your trumpet mouthpiece in this

Do not put your trumpet mouthpiece in this

Vape? Nah, half a clarinet

Have you seen gus?

Oh he's over there getting molested by his mustard yellow friends

I can't wait to get to Hawaii and say 'bonjour, mexico'

It burns my mouth like a hot pocket from hell

I am shiny, fabulous, and full of syrup

I had to manhandle my English muffin

Stop crying, start smoking

I like the humidity. Makes me feel moisturized. Like I'm being licked by the atmosphere, everywhere on my body

No I would like to sex him with considerable vigor

Don't you wanna climb up those mountains, it looks so appetizing. Gonna slurp up those clouds

Oh is that nice on your cute little patoots

Anyone got weed up there?

Yeah! Do you want me to just, like, toss it down?

I remember you, you were useless

Penguins, cause they have toes. That's gonna go well

Let loose and defenestrate

I like it, you look like a stripper

I want to vomit with gusto, with enthusiasm

I am actually a trained exorcist

I like that in a man

That did considerable hurt upon me. I did not like that

They went spearfishing together, that's the gayest shit I've heard all week

Who would win, Scheels or an orca

As in, dressing up in a dinosaur costume and fighting Elvis

We say 'here's the tune,' and then we all just scream for six minutes

Damn girl, what those knees do

Hold on a minute, im sacrificing a freshman to the old gods

No, no, come back, i'm getting sacrificed

I've heard you play, you sound scrumptious, you sound slaylicious

Isn't today a special day to be a third trumpet

No, part of my personality is I'm just having an existential crisis, all the time

That's not smoke on the water, that's I smoked too much

I want to be the justice, wrath, and love of God all at once

He has his masters in going hee honk

Do you like country? Well you're about to find out

He drives like a maniac with his colossal biceps

How do you do the alphabet? It's complicated

Why did you touch your toes like that?

Because we're thermostats

I don't want to know your name, I like our relationship the way it is

You have no business wanting my skin

I will feed your sun dried bones to the old gods

Mack, what time do we get out?

Like, 10:40

What time is it?

10:22

Jesus balls

Violence is not the answer

But cannibalism is

Our churches are all, like, old Walmarts

Shake that bagpipe? Yes please

Everyone's days are numbered

Your number is significantly lower than the average american

#long post #band quotes #concert band #pep band #jazz band #wind ensemble #band #bassoon #saxophone #tenor sax #flute #clarinet #marching band #tuba #euphonium #trumpet #French horn #percussion #high school band #bass clarinet #oboe #cw sex jokes #band kids have filthy minds #and mouths #wow #the things I’ve heard #not all of these are about band #it's the place and the people that count ok

[bijouxcarys]

I know this is a bit late, but I’ve been meaning to share my Spotify top 100 songs from 2023. So uh… here it is lol

Whole Lotta Love - Led Zeppelin

Baba O’Riley - The Who

Sunshine Of Your Love - Cream

The Sound of Silence (Acoustic) - Simon & Garfunkel

Let’s Live For Today - The Grass Roots

Immigrant Song - Led Zeppelin

Paint It, Black - The Rolling Stones

Sweet Emotion - Aerosmith

California Dreamin’ - The Mamas & The Papas

Cherry Bomb - The Runaways

Voodoo Child (Slight Return) - Jimi Hendrix

Eat The Rich - Aerosmith

Dazed and Confused - Led Zeppelin

(Don’t Fear) The Reaper - Blue Öyster Cult

Wig Wam Bam - Sweet

Kings and Queens - Aerosmith

You Shook Me - Led Zeppelin

Great King Rat - Queen

Born To Be Wild - Steppenwolf

Last Child - Aerosmith

April Come She Will - Simon & Garfunkel

Tie Your Mother Down - Queen

Barracuda - Heart

Dream On - Aerosmith

Jungle Boogie - Kool & The Gang

You’re So Vain - Carly Simon

Touch Me - The Doors

Pink - Aerosmith

The Riddle - Gigi D’Agostino

Ramble On - Led Zeppelin

All Day and All of the Night - The Kinks

Dude (Looks Like A Lady) - Aerosmith

Around The World (La La La La) - A Touch Of Class

I Was Made For Lovin’ You - KISS

Another Brick in the Wall, Pt. 2 - Pink Floyd

Magic Touch - Aerosmith

Rebel Rebel - David Bowie

My Generation - The Who

EAT ME - Demi Lovato, Royal & the Serpent

Cheese Cake - Aerosmith

Drowse - Queen

Good Vibrations - The Beach Boys

Off To The Races - Lana Del Rey

Walk This Way - Aerosmith

Cum on Feel the Noize - Slade

I Get Around - The Beach Boys

Layla - Derek & The Dominos

Mrs. Robinson - Simon & Garfunkel

The Hustle - Van McCoy

SKIN OF MY TEETH - Demi Lovato

Piece of My Heart - Janis Joplin

Super Freak - Rick James

Rasputin - Boney M.

Bad Reputation - Joan Jett & the Blackhearts

Love In An Elevator - Aerosmith

You Know You Belong To Me - Queen

Dancing in the Moonlight - King Harvest

Here Comes The Sun - The Beatles

Sedona Sunrise - Aerosmith

You Can’t Hurry Love - The Supremes

Hold the Line - TOTO

Time of the Season - The Zombies

I Want To Hold Your Hand - The Beatles

Bass Slut - S3RL

Born To Die - Lana Del Rey

Seven Seas Of Rhye - Queen

Taste of India - Aerosmith

House Of The Rising Sun - The Animals

(I Can’t Get No) Satisfaction - The Rolling Stones

Son And Daughter - Queen

29 - Demi Lovato

Happier Than Ever - Billie Eilish

Pretty Rave Girl - S3RL

Tarzan & Jane - Toy-Box

The Fairy Feller’s Master-Stroke - Queen

A Building Panic (Album Suite) - James Horner

Drop Dead Gorgeous - Aerosmith

Oxytocin - Billie Eilish

I Can’t Live With You - Queen

Debil - DJ Blyatman

Big Ten Inch Record - Aerosmith

NDA - Billie Eilish

Now I’m Here - Queen

No More Mr. Nice Guy - Alice Cooper

Janie’s Got A Gun - Aerosmith

Therefore I Am - Billie Eilish

The Logical Song - Scooter

Crimson and Clover - Joan Jett & the Blackhearts

Crazy - Aerosmith

HEAVEN - Demi Lovato

Alone - Heart

L’Amour Toujours - Gigi D’Agostino

Angel - Aerosmith

All Along the Watchtower - Jimi Hendrix

FREAK - Demi Lovato, YUNGBLUD

my strange addiction - Billie Eilish

Sight For Sore Eyes - Aerosmith

Purple Haze - Jimi Hendrix

Brighton Rock - Queen

Bring It on Home - Led Zeppelin

#classic rock #70s #led zeppelin #queen #Aerosmith #top 100 #Spotify #spotify wrap 2023 #2023 #music #spotify top 100 #songs #playlist #spotify playlist

[docpiplup]

DAENERYS TARGARYEN APPRECIATION MONTH 2022

Day 13: Dany Being Critical of Herself and Self-Aware

"These are not apples, Ben," said Dany. "These are men and women, sick and hungry and afraid." My children. "I should have gone to Astapor."

"Your Grace could not have saved them," said Ser Barristan. "You warned King Cleon against this war with Yunkai. The man was a fool, and his hands were red with blood."

And are my hands any cleaner? She remembered what Daario had said—that all kings must be butchers, or meat. "Cleon was the enemy of our enemy. If I had joined him at the Horns of Hazzat, we might have crushed the Yunkai'i between us."

The Shavepate disagreed. "If you had taken the Unsullied south to Hazzat, the Sons of the Harpy—"

"I know. I know. It is Eroeh all over again."

Brown Ben Plumm was puzzled. "Who is Eroeh?"

"A girl I thought I'd saved from rape and torment. All I did was make it worse for her in the end. And all I did in Astapor was make ten thousand Eroehs."

"Your Grace could not have known—"

"I am the queen. It was my place to know."

"What is done is done," said Reznak mo Reznak. "Your Worship, I beg you, take the noble Hizdahr for your king at once. He can speak with the Wise Masters, make a peace for us."

A Dance with Dragons, Daenerys V

~

Little children with swollen stomachs trailed after them, too weak or scared to beg. Gaunt men with sunken eyes squatted amidst sand and stones, shitting out their lives in stinking streams of brown and red. Many shat where they slept now, too feeble to crawl to the ditches she'd commanded them to dig. Two women fought over a charred bone. Nearby a boy of ten stood eating a rat. He ate one-handed, the other clutching a sharpened stick lest anyone try to wrest away his prize. Unburied dead lay everywhere. Dany saw one man sprawled in the dirt under a black cloak, but as she rode past his cloak dissolved into a thousand flies. Skeletal women sat upon the ground clutching dying infants. Their eyes followed her. Those who had the strength called out. "Mother … please, Mother … bless you, Mother …"

Bless me, Dany thought bitterly. Your city is gone to ash and bone, your people are dying all around you. I have no shelter for you, no medicine, no hope. Only stale bread and wormy meat, hard cheese, a little milk. Bless me, bless me.

What kind of mother has no milk to feed her children?

A Dance with Dragons, Daenerys VI

~

No queen has clean hands, Dany told herself. She thought of Doreah, of Quaro, of Eroeh … of a little girl she had never met, whose name had been Hazzea.

A Dance with Dragons, Daenerys VIII

#danymonth2022 #daenerys targaryen #a song of ice and fire #asoiaf #canondany #asoiaf book quotes #adwd #day 13 #text #a dance with dragons

[chen-chen-chen-again-chen]

Hi, hello, hola! Thank you for the tag today, @you-remind-me-of-the-babe! Instead of six sentences, today I bring you "six somethings" - six places I'm excited to eat while I'm in London (March 24-April 7)!

If anyone has any recommendations for favourite places to eat in London, PLEASE let me know! 🍽️😋

I'll tag up here because this post is a long boi. Hello hello hello to a buncha folks! @aristocratic-otter @captain-aralias @cutestkilla @thewholelemon @dohrnaira @ebbpettier @facewithoutheart @hushed-chorus @ionlydrinkhotwater @imagineacoolusername @larkral @raenestee @onepintobean @theimpossibledemon @whogaveyoupermission @tectonicduck

6.) Pret (Heathrow)

I know Shepard loses his tiny mind over the sandwiches from Pret, but. I dream of their Chocolate Moose. I have an absurd amount of food allergies, so finding a Chen-friendly, ready made chocolate mousse is a dream come true. So excited to cram it into my face after I clear Customs.

From My Good Egg, Good morning, good night, good morning:

“All right.” Simon goes back to fiddling with Bunce’s phone, and then he says to Bunce, hopeful, “Any chance you brought the rest of my baguette from Pret?”

Bunce says, slowly and carefully, “Simon. I do not know the whereabouts of your airport sandwich. I was rather busy figuring out where you had disappeared to.” 

5.) Borough Market

I have very fond memories of Borough Market from the first/last time I visited London back in 2018. I remember sticking my head in a jar full of dried truffles and just inhaling all that amazing, savoury, umami truffly goodness. (Like, you know, the way that normal humans do.)

From What's Left by @cutestkilla:

I’ve been hanging around Borough Market quite a bit, and I’ve had everything from cheese and croissants to chorizo and balsamic vinegar (in small sample portions only). I think, though, that my favourite thing so far was a fresh buttered wild garlic scone that I bought with some of my stolen money after trying a sample.

4.) MotherMash (Covent Garden)

I also had a good time with a pal at MotherMash years ago - I think instead of pie, I had bangers and mash with gravy, and a tiny, perfect apple pie. My spouse has never been here, but he does frequently say, "I would like to eat a whole pie," and now he will be able to eat TWO pies - one for his main, and one for dessert.

From A cake with your name on it:

Baz was still fuming about the tasting when we met up at his flat for dinner. We had takeaway from MotherMash, and Baz kept stabbing his steak and Stoutheart pie instead of eating it. 

“I’ve never met such an idiot,” he said. “A bumbler. A fool. An absolute nightmare.” 

“Okay,” I said. “We still have that list from my mother with three other bakeries.” 

Baz whipped his head around to stare at me. 

“No,” he said, loudly. Too loudly. He was oddly flushed. “I don’t care if I have to murder and then resurrect him - Simon Snow is making our wedding cake.” 

3.) Brick Lane Beigel Bake (Shoreditch)

I asked my spouse, EarlobeGreyTea, what he wanted to do or eat or see while we're in London and all he would say, over and over again, was "Bagel." He is a remarkably easygoing travel companion.

From an earlier draft of My Good Egg, which ended up getting cut/changed:

They get to Brick Lane before Baz can embarrass himself any further, and he waits outside of a bagel shop until Simon comes out with a salt beef bagel crammed into his mouth, and a very full paper bag. “This one’s for you,” he says, holding out a salmon and cream cheese bagel to Baz. 

Baz takes it, but doesn’t bite into it right away. “Thank you,” he says, slowly, thinking that maybe offering food is one of Simon’s love languages as well, along with killing things. The rats seem to be a lucky intersection. 

2.) E Pellici's (Bethnal Green)

I think my favourite full English breakfast that I ever had was at Pellici's, which is tiny and and owned by an Italian family. The owner spent most of the time I was there embarrassing one of his teenage employees and a girl who was interviewing him for a school project. The owner high fived me when I bought a t-shirt and he went slack-jawed at my powerful, resounding high five. It was great.

From an unpublished bit of My Good Egg:

In the car, Baz passes both slices of fruitcake to Simon, and Simon practically dances in his seat. 

“Are you sure?” Simon asks, “like, really, really sure? Cause I’m telling you, this is really fucking amazing fruitcake, and you can’t buy it most of the time unless you order it special - they don’t even have it on the menu anymore.” “They’re yours, Simon,” Baz says. Honestly, Simon Snow is impossible. He was ready to kill a man for Baz, or not kill a man for him, and now he’s beaming at Baz because of some fruitcake. He needs to pin Simon to a mattress and keep him there — with handcuffs, with a collar, with a ring.

1.) Dishoom (King's Cross)

Dishoom is like... truly magical. That house black daal is no joke. I lack words to describe how amazing the food is - just check out their site (but honestly, it will make you hungry). Everything I've ever had there was fucking delicious and the place and the atmosphere is so gorgeous, just lush and colourful and immersive.

I shared another snippet before about Dishoom from My Good Egg, but here's Simon on the phone with Agatha right after he's ordered takeaway:

“Hey Ags. How’re you – no, I’m not bleeding or throwing up or on fire. I – yeah, I know you said not to call you when you’re at work unless I was bleeding or throwing up or on fire, but this is an – look, it’s not for me this time, all right? Or Penny. It’s for a friend – okay, rude, I have friends other than you and Penny!” Pause. “Yes, Agatha, we’re friends, even if you – yeah, I know you said you would never do another house visit, but you said that the last time, too!” 

Baz leans back so he can catch Bunce’s eyes, and mouths, What the fuck?  

Bunce just rolls her eyes and shrugs, like, He’s Simon, what can you do about it?  

“Well,” Simon says, triumphant, “we already ordered the daal for you, so there!” Pause. “Yeah, love you too. Bye.”  

RIPs & Honourable Mentions

Cinnamon Soho (also mentioned in "A cake with your name on it") - They closed down during the pandemic. But they had a delicious Indian afternoon tea 🥲

Cereal Killer Cafe - This place was rec'd to me by one of my British co-workers (his seven kids were mad for it), but sadly, they closed their storefront during the pandemic and went online. (In my headcanon, this was where Winifred from My Good Egg wanted to go for her(?) first(?) birthday)

Fortnum & Mason - I WILL be going here to buy tea and biscuits (and to replace one of my favourite tote bags, LOL), but not for high tea or afternoon tea. (We have a few other places lined up for that, including The Swan at the Globe and Tea House Theatre). Sorry, Daphne!

Nando's - I suggested to my spouse that we should get cheeky Nando's and have top bants and he gave me a dead-eyed look as if his soul left his body

Again, if you have any recommendations of favourite places to eat in London, please let me know!

I mean, I suppose I'll be doing other things besides eating, like hanging out with my beautiful friends, going to stationery shops, visiting the flower market, seeing shows and things... but really, food is the main draw. 😂😂😂

Happy Sunday!

#six something sunday! #delicious things to consoom #with fic snippets #my good egg #good night good morning good night #a cake with your name on it #what's left by cutekilla #London 2023 #my fic tag