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#edit oh my god last post was 2 months ago???
festiveggplant · 2 years
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every so often i remember this account exists. hello
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lxnarphase · 3 months
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i'll give you the fire i keep inside ๋࣭ ⚝
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up to the challenge : ⌞no nut november⌝ edition [ pt 2 - pt 3 - pt 4 ]
☾₊‧⁺...ft. : gojo satoru + geto suguru
☾₊‧⁺...cw : pussy eating, praise kink, begging, premature ejaculation, clothed sex, whiny reader (gojo), smug reader (geto), satoru overestimating himself, suguru 'just the tip' geto
☾₊‧⁺...synopsis : it's nowhere near november, but i need to write this. it's based off an old post of mine from 4 years ago! so, i have no excuse 🖤
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✧ g. satoru lasts : 2 days
oh, satoru is so confident that he'll easily make it through the entirety of november. the moment he coos to you about how excited he is to participate in 'no nut november' as a challenge against suguru, he's walking around with his chest puffed out. however, he doesn't take into account that you'd be a little upset after he tells you, thinking you have to go a whole month without sex with your boyfriend. but everyone knows satoru is the best boyfriend, right? he'd neeeever let his pretty lil' mochi feel unsatisfied. so, on the second day of November, he's got you up on the kitchen counter, mouth buried between your thighs as he practically devours your cunt, messily licking and sucking at your clit as his eyes roll back just from the taste of you. after all, there's no way he'd lose this way!
it had only been two days since satoru had fucked you, how were you this wet and needy? you were dripping down his chin, soaking his fucking face, and god, he was in heaven. "c'mon, baby, grind that clit into my mouth," he fucking whines, kissing your pussy between slurps, hands holding you spread open for him to keep testing you. satoru's so hard, it hurts, his cock rubbing and twitching against the rough fabric of his sweatpants, but he couldn't touch, he wouldn't let himself. he'd be fine, all he needed was to make sure he made his baby cum. "hhf, 't-toru, 'toruuuu, i-i miss you, i miss youuu," you pitifully whine, pretty eyes filling with tears as you grew closer and closer to cumming all over his face. but just hearing you say that you miss him when it hasn't even been a fucking week almost makes satoru cum, almost. "baby, babyyy, don't say that shit," satoru whimpers, about to pull away from your dripping slit, dizzy from your words. but you don't let him, no, not when you're this close. with the cutest little huff, you look him right in his pretty blue eyes and grab a fistful of his hair, smashing his mouth right back against your cunt as you cry his name. and oh, the noise he lets out against your pussy feels so gooddd, feeling his tongue desperately licking up your cum. god, you were practically suffocating him. all that Satoru could process was you, you, you. jesus, he didn't think he'd be able to leave you alone the rest of the month, not when just going two days got you this desperate...he really was fucking you that good that you got addicted, huh? it's okay because honestly? he missed your pussy so fucking much. "'toru, satoruuu, p-please, i-i don't like this challenge anymore, miss when you stuff me w-with your cum," you whine as you ride out the last waves of your orgasm, giving him one last tug into your pussy so his mouth was right over your clit. have you always been this fucking whiny and demanding? god, satoru couldn't remember. but, you didn't realize how seriously all the tugging and those filthy, desperate words of yours would affect him. hell, he didn't know how badly it would affect him. once he separates himself from you, he's avoiding eye contact, and he's getting red. embarrassed. flustered. all it took was a quick glance down to see what the issue was. "b-baby, you...i just...how—" "'toru, did you cum in your pants?"
✧ g. suguru lasts : 2.5 weeks
the only reason suguru decided to participate in this was because satoru roped him into it. not that he didn't think he could do it, but because he knew satoru was going to lose against him. he's so thankful that you're nothing but supportive, eager for him to win this challenge with the promise of a reward of his choosing once he made it to December 1st. it's honestly not that hard. as long as he's able to still be affectionate with you, suguru is content. sure, sometimes he has to stop his imagination, but otherwise, he's fine. at least, that's until he comes home to you wearing the cutest purple thigh highs with little skulls on them. it starts off with suguru pulling you closer, making you stand between his legs as his hands rub up and down your plush thighs...but next thing you know, your legs are over his shoulders as he drags his cock up and down your slit.
"just—just the tip, okay? i can't put anymore in, princess." "suguruuuuu, just! put it in! stop teasing!" those pretty legs of yours would always be his downfall, suguru could never resist them. there wasn't anything even sexual about it, but just seeing how they squeezed your thighs so perfectly...he couldn't help himself. but if he only let himself put the tip of his dick inside that tight little hole of yours, he'd be fine...yeah, he just needed a small feel, and he'd be fine. without any more hesitation, suguru slowly sunk into your puffy pussy, letting out a shaky groan as his head fell down onto your shoulder. shit, shit, shit, it was only the tip, but you felt so good, too fucking good. "g-god, why's this cunt so wet and warm, baby? it's not fair," suguru hissed, lifting his head to look down to where you both were connected. "s'not my fault you wanted to do this dumb challenge," you hummed, a little smug smile on your face. "stop listenin' to satoru, you'll get stupid like him." it made him laugh, you were so amused by him barely holding himself together...and he couldn't blame you, he wasn't the type to break so easily... "s-suguruuu, wait, you said just the tip, that's—suguuuu!" suguru let out the most scandalized gasp when he realized his entire cock was being hugged by your soft, hot walls. it was so cute, though, how you tried to help him, to let him know so he didn't lose. such a sweetheart, weren't you? but, suguru was too far gone. he had slowly begun inching himself inside of you, not even realizing it until it was too late. not being able to stop his hips from moving, thrusting in and out of you, creating a little ring of cream around the base of his cock as his dick dragged against those soft spots inside you that made you keen his name. "oh, princess, angel, you're so sweet, you know that? s-shit, listen to that pussy...she missed this? she missed the feeling of her sugu inside? hm? fuuuck, fuck it, 'm-'m gonna give you what you need, baby, d-don't worry," he says in a needy rasp, pressing his forehead against yours, giving you a delirious little grin. yeah, suguru knew he was going to lose today...he'd be damned if he didn't cum all over this sweet cunt. all because of some stupidly cute socks.
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all rights reserved © lxnarphase | do not repost, copy, translate, or alter my work
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hihello-pinky · 5 months
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part one ,, last part
i’m still stuck on Sight part 4 but heyyy i got kinda inspired to make this pt 2.
will post part 3 hopefully before the year ends lol.
not edited/written at 3am
8:50 PM
suna watches as osamu guides you out of the restaurant with a hand on your lower back. he hears atsumu whistle across him. “i swear to god, if my idiot of a brother won’t make a move on y/n, i will.”
he resists shaking his head, knowing that atsumu already has eyes on someone else, but he doesn’t bring it up. instead, his brows furrow, concern about you starting to cloud his mind.
he’s always been observant of you. it was only after he began dating hani that he started to spend less time looking at you. that was a few months ago and yet, he wonders why he wasn’t able to tell that you were feeling unwell.
“are you okay, love?” hani asks beside him, breaking him out of his reverie.
“yeah…”
something passes along her face but he’s not able to catch it and what it can mean. instead, hani gives his hand a squeeze. he knows it’s meant to be reassuring but to suna, it feels as if he’s being held back from running towards something that he has always wanted.
QUESTIONS
suna always looked forward to practice and to say it’s purely because of volleyball would be a lie. sure, he loved the sport, but his excitement towards practice was amplified by something else – the thought of seeing you.
he wasn’t sure when he began to develop feelings for you that crossed the boundaries of platonic friendship. maybe it’s the way that whenever you would pass by their room, you’d look through the window and give him your sweet smile. maybe it’s the way you would always scold the twins during lunch whenever they get engrossed in their banter rather than eating. maybe it’s the way you would tie up your hair in a messy ponytail during practice, hands busy scribbling down notes on your manager’s pad.
suna wasn’t sure but by the beginning of sophomore year, he knew in his heart that he liked you.
on that particular day, you arrived at the gym a few minutes late and he was surprised to see that you weren’t alone. another girl was with you. as you introduced to the team that she’s your friend from student council, he could feel her curious eyes on him.
hani nakamura was her name, you said.
that day after practice, he noticed you and hani pass by the convenience store where he and the twins stopped by at. he immediately but subtly went ahead outside, only to see a glimpse of you blushing as you talked to hani.
he couldn’t help but think that the two of you were probably talking about boys, hence your blush. isn’t that what girls do? that night, when he got home, suna began playing scenarios in his head on how best to confess to you.
8:55
“i’m tired,” hani says softly as she rests her head on his shoulders. it snaps suna out of his thoughts, a reminder that he’s already dating the girl beside him, who, unlike you, will never play with his feelings.
he strokes her hair gently. “should we go?”
her response is a pout and a cutely-said “yes please.”
around him, his teammates fake barfing. “you two lovebirds are so cheesy! get out of here!”
suna is unable to resist his smirk as he shakes his head. “we’ll go ahead. y’all better also leave soon before you get wasted.” to atsumu he says, “except you, idiot, since you’re already wasted.”
hani giggles beside him as she links her arm with his. they both walk towards the parking lot, hani excitedly talking about everyone’s reactions when they told them about their relationship.
once they reach his car, hani murmurs, “oh no…”
“what?” suna’s instantly alert, “what’s the matter?”
hani looks at him sheepishly as she says, “i need to run to the restroom. sorry, love. be right back!”
suna exhales in relief and smiles. “okay. be careful. i’ll start heating up the car.” he waits for her to disappear from his view before he turns towards his car but before he could open the door, something catches his eyes.
it’s you inside osamu’s car, legs bent towards your chest, body shaking. and though he can’t hear it, he knows you’re crying.
he feels a little pain by his chest as he resists the urge to run to you, to comfort you and ask what’s wrong and to just make sure that you’ll be okay.
instead, he shakes his head and refocuses on his car but not after mumbling to himself, “stupid osamu and his non-tinted windows.”
EXPECTATIONS
it felt as if the universe was against suna’s plan of confessing his feelings to you. whenever he tried to get you alone after practice, something comes up and then either you or he would need to go ahead.
it was beginning to frustrate him. it didn’t help that on your non-busy days, your friend, hani, was always tagging along. after the first time, hani’s visits during their practice frequented and it soon became apparent to suna how close the two of you had become.
an idea suddenly came to suna.
since hani was close to you and it seemed as if she would never leave your side, what if he befriended her? maybe she could even give insights on and help with his confession.
he didn’t let the thought sit too long in his head; by the next time hani accompanied you to practice, suna started a random conversation. this would soon mark the beginning of their friendship.
suna admittedly only talked to hani in hopes of getting help confessing to you but what he didn’t expect was for him to actually get along well with her. once their friendship had reached a comfortable level, he finally decided to open up to her.
what he didn’t expect was the words that would leave hani’s mouth. “oh, suna-senpai, are you sure? i’m not sure if it’s my place to say, but…”
she was looking at him with sympathetic eyes, making suna feel foolish as he replayed what he had shared – about his changing feelings at the beginning of the school year, about the hints you’ve been dropping to him for the past months.
he awkwardly scratched at his nape. “well?”
hani bit her lip. “y/n-senpai actually likes someone in the volleyball team. you’re actually very close to him, maybe that’s why she was being too close to you as well…”
the end of her sentence was blurry to suna as he watched across the court how you playfully interacted with osamu.
suna’s eyes hardened as he swallowed the lump in his throat. “i see.”
11:42
suna couldn’t fall asleep. it’s been a few hours since he dropped hani off at their house but he’s still wide awake, his eyes fixed on the dull ceiling of his room.
thoughts of you swarm his mind.
after that conversation with hani many months ago, his treatment towards you never changed. he was mad at first but then realized that what you did to him had the same intention as why he even approached hani in rhe first place; the stark difference being he didn’t intend to toy with the girl’s heart.
nonetheless, he let the matter go. you were all still young and stupid anyway, and at the same time, he got too pre-occupied with his budding relationship with hani.
still, it bothered him. the sight of you sobbing in osamu’s car wouldn’t leave his mind. what could have happened to make you have a breakdown like that?
he contemplated on sending you or osamu a message just for his peace of mind and before he can decide who to text, his phone rings.
his eyes widened once he saw your contact id. he stared at it for a few more seconds before swiping right.
“y/n?”
“… hey, suna. i didn’t think you’d pick up.”
he hated how you sound stuffy but chose not to comment on it. “well… what’s up?”
a barely-concealed sniffle. “c-can we talk?”
“okay, sure. go ahead.”
“no, i mean in person. the 12th convenience store?”
he smiled at the mention of the place. “okay. see you in a few.”
“see you.”
once you hang up, suna dropped his phone on the bed and immediately went to get his favorite hoodie.
the same hoodie that you’ve been asking for him to give to you ever since he let you borrow it on one rainy afternoon.
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seenoversundown · 3 months
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Sparrow Of the Dawn : Chapter 1
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Sam x Willa (Fem OC) Warnings: Alcohol / Mentions of drinking, brotherly banter, dark humor/mentions of death (if you squint), otherwise silly boys being boys.
Word Count: 3.9K
Summary : Sam unfortunately finds himself in not so meet cute with Willa. Hopeful that he doesn't cross her path again; the world works in mysterious ways and not always in your favor.
Authors Note: AHHHHH I can’t wait for everybody to read and I hope you all love it as much as I do!! I’m so excited and nervous, feels like I’m waiting for the midnight premiere of Deathly Hallows (part 2) all over again 🥹😭💜
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Flower Power - Greta Van Fleet “She’s a sparrow of the dawn, our love is born”
“Oh, HEY,” Jake says sarcastically the second he opens the front door, “Nice of you to show up, Jackass,” huffing out a laugh as he shuts the door behind me. The scuffed-up cherry wood floor creaks under the weight of our feet as I follow him over to where he had been organizing new stock behind the bar. 
“Right.. aaand where’s my paycheck again?” I retort, sliding onto my regular spot and dropping my camera bag next to me. The spot in the dead center of the bar has been claimed as mine since before Jake even opened, the stool now complete with my etched initials SFK under the cushion. 
“Time is money, brother, and I lend you mine for free, so you get me when I’m free. Which apparently to you means 9 a.m.?” I say, clasping my hands on the bartop, “So please, tell me what is so important that I needed to be here so early.” He sourly smirks back at me.
“Yeah, yeah. I have a few new ones in for you to shoot, and I’d like to get it done before we get busy today.” He picks up his clipboard, eyeing his stock list.
 “We finally got the pomegranate Downeast released last month that was on backorder, as well as the pear and the guava passion fruit. Then we have ‘Reciprocal’ from Bissell Bros here in Portland, and ‘Interchangeable #7’ from Blaze Brewing in Biddo. I’d really like to get the blaze shot for our ads because it has the most interesting can art. But, ya know, I trust you.” He reads off.
A year ago, Jake, my older brother, bought this bar located right here in the heart of the Old Port. Back in his senior year of high school he got really into “Black Sails”, this pirate TV show; he practically made it his personality. Naturally, he decided he wanted to run a bar for the rest of his life, so when old man Chuck decided to retire, Jake jumped at the opportunity to purchase it. “Caravel Tavern” has only been open for 6 months and It's been his baby ever since. 
“Wow, Jake Kiszka putting trust in ME? Are you feeling okay?” I feign shock grabbing at my heart.
“Just get it done, you idiot,” he says with a roll of his eyes.
“Alright, alright,” I say, glancing over the options. “Give me like an hour. I have an idea that might work. I need to head to the farmer’s market in town, but I can have the best shots edited and emailed to you tomorrow, and then we can pick the best ones for print.” I grab my bag, digging around for my car keys. “Hey, when is Josh in today? I’d like to get some shots of you guys pouring drinks for the website and Instagram for Josh’s intro post.”
“He should be here by the time you’re done with everything. That is if he’s on time. But let's be realistic, when is a Kiszka ever on time?” He replies as he breaks down boxes with a box cutter. 
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I take a right onto the gravel that’s set behind the farmers market, my rusty 92’ Ford F-150 rattling as I park. I hope to god it’s just a heat shield making that noise. I cannot afford another repair on Edith. She may be an old crotchety bitch, but she has my whole heart. Well, right behind Penelope, my Bernese mountain dog, Penny girl will always be my number one.
Ding 
I put her in park and shove my hand into my backpack blindly searching for the source of the text tone. Finally finding my phone Tweedle Dum🦞 appears on the screen.. I let out a giggle. 
We’re running a special on whiskey sours tonight pick up some eggs, princess.
I switch Jake and Josh’s contact name back and forth between tweedle dee and tweedle dum mainly to keep them on their toes, but I’d be lying if I said tweedle dum isn’t just whoever has pissed me off or been dubbed the biggest dumbass that week. The emojis always stay the same so I can keep them actually straight though. 
You got it, boss, I send back to Jake, winning the title this week for making me wake up at the ass crack of 9am. Which absolutely is early for me. 
Gathering my things, I step out of my truck, immediately being hit with a cold gust of wind, the air causing my eyes to water slightly. I brush away a tear forming in my eye before it threatens to fall down my cheek. For it being the end of March the air is crispier than normal. I pause a moment too long, and a shiver runs through my body. I zip my jacket up a little higher, trying to preserve my body heat. Making sure I have my mesh bag with me, I shut my door and head over to the booths. 
I make a beeline for Linda, a sweet older woman who is here every week selling chicken eggs, various fruits from her garden, and some knick-knack crafts she makes. I have about seven bowl koozies, though I’m not sure I even own as many bowls considering it’s just me, but they are really good for ramen and ice cream. Which I do not eat together. Jake and Josh live in the apartment above the bar, so when I moved back after college, I got an apartment a couple roads away to stay close. 
Our parents moved out of our small hometown, which sits just on the other side of Portland. Padded off to Apple Valley, Georgia trying to settle into a warmer climate or something. They bought a house big enough for just the two of them and a guest room on an acre of land, “just in case any of you boys come to visit” Mom said. In all honesty, Apple Valley is just the same town, different state. They always said they didn’t like the city because it was too big, which is funny to me after spending the last four years in Boston. Everything here seems much smaller now.
“Morning Linda!” I smile and wave at her.
“Oh, Samuel. You’re up early this week. How are you doing, Sweetheart? How’s my Daniel?” She flashes me a warm smile. She’s also Daniel’s biggest fan. Pretty sure she only comes into the bar to see him, even though I met her first. But what can I say? I’m apparently an excellent matchmaker; we just won't mention the fact that she's 72.
I chuckle, “I’m just out running some errands for Jake. I’m on call today, apparently. Daniel’s good though! He misses you, ya know.” I finish flashing her a wink.
She lets out a high-pitched laugh, “I’ll be down to visit with Miss Eleanor. You tell him not to worry.” She raises an eyebrow and smirks at me, “Anyway, what can I get ya my dear?”
“Think two dozen will do it for today.” I hand her a crumpled ten-dollar bill in exchange, “Keep the change, Lin. I’ll see you at the bar or next Saturday, whichever comes first.” I set the eggs carefully in my tote and head toward my next stop, the flower truck.
The beer I’m photographing for the bar has a brightly colored logo in a style reminiscent of comic book art. A bold red can with yellow, blue, and purple adorning the signature name. My idea is to use a bouquet of different flowers to accent the colors and make the can pop. 
I scan through the metal buckets, trying to mentally piece together an arrangement without disturbing the flowers too much. They are far too delicate to be pulling and yanking on them just to try them out for size. Some of the people here, like Linda, make their living posting up every Saturday. 
I reach for a bundle of forget-me-nots, settling on those along with the last of the remaining Irises, a few red Dahlias, Daffodils, and Butterfly Milkweed. Taking a step back slightly away from the displays, I start to rearrange the bouquet to my liking. Extending my arms out in front of me, and changing my angle to make sure I like how the flowers look together. Just as I decide that, yes, these will do for what their intended purpose is, I feel someone aggressively poking my bicep. 
I turn toward the person attached to the finger. Not going to lie; I’m a bit impressed by the force of it, considering I’m wearing a sweater under my quilted jacket, and the woman who’s doing the poking is standing at about 5 foot nothing and looks like a swift breeze might carry her away. I blink slowly at her a few times and raise my eyebrows waiting expectedly.
“Did someone die, or did you just fuck up like, wicked bad?” the snark heavily laden on her tone. 
I close my eyes and let out a long breath, “Uhm, it’s uhh –” I stutter a bit, really trying to play it up, “My grandma died last week, actually. Did you know her? Her name was Althea.” I gaze down at my shoes and drop my head a bit, taking a moment before I attempt to look for her reaction through my eyelashes. If I held my breath long enough, I might just be able to work up a tear. Would that be too dramatic? .. maybe.
“Oh.. uh. No, I didn’t. I’m sor–” Regret immediately paints her face.
“I’m fucking with you.” I let out a small laugh
“What?” her eyes narrow at me, trying to figure out if I’m lying or telling the truth.
“I’m joking, my grandma is fine. Are you okay? Or is it a normal occurrence for you to ask a complete stranger if they’re mourning a dead relative?" Amusement settles on my face.
She lets out an audible groan. Why is she so angry? She tugs down at the sides of her short floral dress and waves a hand out toward my arrangement. 
“Why on earth do you need every single purple flower!?” She exclaims, “And who jokes about their grandma dying?” stamping her beaten-up Doc Marten into the patchy grass. She actually stomped her foot at me. What are we twelve?
I roll my eyes and attempt to alleviate the situation, “Bachelor Buttons.” 
I have work to do and absolutely do not need an attitude from a complete stranger, even if she is cute. I have brothers for that purpose, and they do their jobs well enough.
 “They’re mostly purple but with a bit of blue. They symbolize love if you’re trying to give them to someone important.” I scratch the back of my head and briefly hope she says she’s not. I immediately throw the thought away with a shake of my head. Nope, not opening that door.
“I don’t need Bachelor Buttons.” 
“.. ookaay. You could always d –” 
“I need Irises.” She says, cutting me off, “Specifically. Okay? And I’m fine, but if I can't find irises today because of you count *poke* your *poke* days!” she ends her sentiment with a final sharp poke to my chest and storms away. God damn, her finger is like a tiny dagger.
Listen, growing up without any sisters means I don’t know much about women, but what I do know .. is definitely never believe one when they say they’re fine. 
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As I walk through the door of Caravel Tavern for the second time today, I call out, “Okay, Jake, I’m back with your eggs, Asshole. Where are you?”
I set my camera bag and the eggs down and lean over the counter, checking to see if he’s kneeling behind the bar top.
 “.. Jake?” I look side to side. Where the hell is he? It’s the middle of the day, not nearly early enough for lunch.. Not like the guy takes a break anyway. 
“JAKE WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU?!” I yell through my cupped hands. The sound echoes through the empty space.
He comes running from the back room, a panic written on his face. “Jesus Christ, Sam, what?”
“Got your eggs.” grinning wildly at him. I swear I'm actually his favorite brother. 
“Well, thanks, Samuel, for being useful for one thing today.” He says, before changing his tone, “You okay? You look a bit tense?”
“Yeah,” absentmindedly, my hand drifts to my shoulder, rubbing at the area where angry-flower-girl poked me earlier. “Actually, you’ll never believe what happened to me at the farmers market.”
He’s not looking at me when he hums his response, just putting the eggs in the mini fridge next to the ice well. I slide the second carton over to him.
“I ran into this girl, actually, she ran into me rather. I was picking out the bouquet arrangement for the photos I want to take and she sorta.. Came at me poking?”
He slowly stands and looks at me, his brow furrowed a bit. “She.. came at you?” He pauses. “Poking?”
“Poking,” I point to my shoulder in disbelief.
“Okay, and what did this poking girl want?”
“To yell at me for taking all the irises. I tried to do the gentlemanly thing and suggest an alternative, but she poked me some more and stomped off. She was hot as hell even if she was a bit psychotic.” 
“Well, why did you take all the irises? You also could have taken the other- wait, “ Jake pauses, turning to face me head-on. He sets the empty carton on the counter, “No, whatever you’re thinking about, cut it out,” He points at me, “Did you forget about the last ‘cute but insane’ girl?” 
“Hey, she wasn’t that bad! AND she was really hot?!” both hands raised.
“Sam, she cracked your windshield” he pinches the bridge of his nose.
Just as I’m about to further protest, “Cracked windshield? We’re not talking about ‘the Bride of Chucky’ are we?” Josh says
“Oh, come on guys, you can say her name. And again.. She wasn't that bad.”
“No, every time you say her name she comes back like Voldemort, and none of us need that shit.”
“Yeah, yeah, yeah, whatever. Get your ass clocked in so I get your headshots done, and you can get to work lest Jake have a stroke.” I lean toward Josh and whisper, “You’re already late.”
“When isn’t he late?” Jake sighs and rolls his eyes.
“Well,” Josh claps his hands together, “it is clearly time for my close-up. Sammy, let’s get this shit fest over with.”  
Oh, Josh, ever the dramatic brother.
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I don’t spend a ton of time taking Josh’s photos, grateful that he isn’t afraid of the camera. I barely have to direct him, which makes my life that much easier. If he could work on just not being a pain in the ass the rest of the time, that’d be great. 
A few goodbyes later, and I’m finally off to edit. Putting all my things into the passenger seat and giving my truck some words of encouragement, the engine turns over. Thank fucking god. I live fairly close to the bar, so I decide to not bother with the radio and just listen to whatever comes my way. 
Still thinking about the poking girl, mostly because my chest was sore. I didn’t expect to be stabbed today. I do hope she found her Irises…  
‘Now I don’t hardly know her, but I think I could love her,’
I turn the volume up on the radio, hoping it’ll help me focus on driving and not thinking about her.  
I make it back home, throwing the truck in park and hustling up to my apartment. I’m quickly greeted by my bundle of joy. I set all my things out to edit on the counter and take care of Miss P before I start working.
Taking a walk is probably what I needed to do anyway. 
I got Penelope right after I graduated and moved back up here. Being used to a house full of people to just living alone was.. well, lonely. I think I lasted only a few months living alone before I gave in and went to find a pet. The twins suggested a cat because they’re fairly low maintenance, and their plan was to get a couple cats once their lives settled a bit. Settled ended up being right around when Jake bought the bar, I would hardly call that settled, but it worked out for them. Me on the other hand, I’m more of a dog person. As soon as I saw Penny, I knew she’d be my adventure buddy, coming with me on my walks and hikes and photography trips. It’s definitely easier with a dog, despite what Josh says about how easy it is to train a cat with a harness to adventure with you.
Once she is settled in after our walk, I sit down to edit for a while. Pulling up the photos of Josh, something seems off. Why are half of these out of focus? I think to myself, scrolling through the options. If he could have just stopped talking for two seconds, this one would have looked good.  The longer I scroll through the options, the more annoyed I get. Why did she poke me so fucking hard? Finding myself rubbing the spot on my chest, I force myself to get up for a minute. Maybe I just need to walk around. Wandering into my bathroom, I pull the collar of my shirt down to see the spot, if it doesn’t actually bruise, I’ll be SHOCKED.  
Sitting back down, I take one look at the photo I've been trying to salvage, letting out a sigh. This is awful. 
Me: hey I’m not super happy with how Josh’s pics came out.. Do you care if I just borrow him in the morning to get some new ones? 
Me: Not at 6am tho-  it’ll be Sunday, The Lord’s day, and he would want me to get my beauty rest. 
Tweedle Dum🦞: lol that’s fine bud 
Me: I may come back for a drink tho. Shit has me STRESSED.
⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯
“God, Sam, don’t you ever leave?” Josh calls from behind the bar. 
“You’d think I was tired of looking at your ugly mug all day, but guess not.” My lips wind into a tight smile. “Can I actually get a drink? I’m annoyed as fuck that I hate all the pictures I took today, and a drink sounds like the perfect remedy.” 
“Turning to alcohol to solve your problems, hmm?”
“Shhhhh,” I wave my hands in front of me. “Can I get a Clover Club, maybe? In a whiskey glass.. No garnish. I don’t wanna look like a little bitch.” I groan 
“Let your freak flag fly, brother,” spinning away to go make my drink and tend to the other patrons seated down the bar top. 
This drink really better do the trick so I can relax for five minutes. Honestly, the pressure I put on myself to make sure I do well for Jake’s pride and joy, along with trying to find my own way with a full-time job is a little exhausting. It’s hard knowing that Caravel is his baby; he really doesn’t have much else going on. I swear if he got laid, he’d be a hell of a lot less uptight about it, but I digress. I don’t totally feel like I’m the most reliable person, but I try to make sure he can count on me and I don’t contribute to his stress. Ya know, he’s my brother, and I want him to be as proud of me as I am of him for doing what he loves so much. I don’t think I tell him enough how proud I really am of him. He’s someone I look to for inspiration for trying to pave my own way. I’d never tell him that though, because he’d probably think I was yanking his chain or something. I have a job trial-type thing down in Boston later this week, and I’m really hoping it turns out to be something good. I could use something good right now.
Josh interrupts my thoughts, setting my drink down, “Just how you asked for it in a cocktail glass with extra garnish.”
I sigh audibly, “Ya know, I don’t even care. Gimme it.” I gulp it down in nearly one go. Josh looks surprised at me. Whether it’s because of my eagerness or because he knows I’m terrible at holding my alcohol, I’m not sure. I don’t care. 
“One more.” I close my eyes, waiting for the gin to work its magic on me. Feeling my muscles relax bit by bit, my brow finally straightens out, and I sink down against the wall closest to my seat. I sigh audibly again, though this time it’s one of relief.
The longer I sit here, the more people are trickling in. Sipping on my drink this time, I notice people in all sorts of outfits looking vaguely like anime characters. Gathering in little cliques of friend groups, a few interesting folk bouncing from table to table. I can't tell if time is moving incredibly fast or if the alcohol has made me move slower, but suddenly, I have the realization that it’s packed in here. Since opening, they’ve been able to handle everything behind the bar, just the two of them, with Daniel manning the door, but I don’t think they’re equipped to handle whatever event these people are overflowing from. 
I swig back the last sip of my drink, grab my glass, and make my way to the back room. I toss the raspberry garnish before setting the glass in the sink to be washed. Grabbing the ice bucket, I start to fill it to make sure the front is stocked for them; ice is usually always the first thing to go. I lug the full bucket back behind the bar, and refill the ice well. 
“Thanks, Sammy. Hey,  would you mind bussing some of the tables and asking the people with tabs if they need any refills, please? I’ll make sure I put you on the payroll for the night,” Jake asks, eyes pleading and desperate for help. And really, who am I to say no to him?
“Of course I can. I’ve got nothing else better to do anyway.” I start to reach for a tray. 
“Thanks. I mean it.” he says, squeezing my shoulder, “I forgot PortCon was happening, and we’re close to one of the hotels.” He explains before returning to the drink he's making. 
That explains the costumes. I do my rounds checking to make sure everyone seated in the booths are okay, grabbing the empty drinks out of their way, making light conversation when I can. I bring a tray of glasses, napkins, and various random trash items back behind the bar and set them in the bin next to Jake. Just as I go to take another trip, my eyes catch the door. Of course. Of course, this would happen to me. I can’t have a single day go smoothly if my life depended on it. Good God, someone is out to get me, I swear. 
“Fuck me,” I say out loud. 
“Who is that?” Jake says to me as he’s working on his current drink order. 
“The angry-flower-girl with the dagger fingers,” I pause, looking at the dude standing next to her, “annnd her date.”
“Oh shit.”
Crimson and Clover - Tommy James and the Shondells
“Now I don't hardly know her But I think I could love her Crimson and clover”
<- Prologue Chapter Two ->
Masterpost | Taglist | Jukebox Playlist
Taglist:
@gvfsstardust, @myleftsock, @mindastreamofcolours, @dont-go-home-without-me, @literal-dead-leaf, @lizzys-sunflower, @threadofstars, @mackalah, @klarxtr, @edgingthedarkness, @writingcold, @i-love-gvf, @takenbythemadness, @ladywhimsymoon, @earthgrlsreasy, @ourlovesdesire, @peaceloveunitygvf, @anythingforjtk
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folklorebae · 2 years
Text
𝐈𝐧𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐫𝐚𝐦 𝐀𝐔 - 𝐒𝐞𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐭𝐥𝐲 𝐘𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬 𝐏𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝟐
𝐃𝐫𝐚𝐛𝐛𝐥𝐞  𝐏𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝟏 𝐅𝐢𝐜
Cast(s): Actress!Reader & Actor!Suna Rintarou
Warning(s): Swearing, a bit suggestive at the end, reader is using she/her pronouns, girls in pics are just for references, all of these pictures aren't mine (I just edited some of them)
A/n: This is the longest insta au I've ever made. Bcs I just discovered that you can upload more than 10 images on tumblr's web. But I hope it's not boring tho😭
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yourinstagram wanna take this downtown?
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nikizefanya This liquid courage got me way too honest
Liked by yourinstagram
ynfan13 WHAT THE HECK IS GOING ON?!?
rintarousuna We should explore europe together, wdyt?
↳yourinstagram Ofc, you're the Boots to my Dora❤️
↳rintarousuna Okay, princess
↳aquariusuna WTF AAAAAA!!! SO YOU GUYS ARE OFFICIAL NOW?!?
↳sunafan15 Y/N, I'D DIE IF RIN CALLS ME PRINCESS. TELL ME WHAT BLACK MAGIC ARE YOU USING?!?
↳ynfan14 LITERALLY JUST DIED. FUCKING FINALLY!!! YOU GUYS ARE PERFECT FOR EACH OTHER❤️❤️❤️
rinynfloral I KNEW IT. I FUCKING KNEW IT
antiyn2 Just a week ago he said he wanna keep the relationship private and now look at his "girlfriend". This is definitely for pr
↳ynfan15 I smell jealousy😌
↳cinnamon.ln You need to realise that he got interviewed months ago, darl. People change. Just be happy for them, you're so negative lmao
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rintarousuna あの通りを散歩して街灯の下で踊った
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atsumumiya That's it, I'm gonna log out from this shitty app
↳yourinstagram You're just jealous, Miya
↳rintarousuna You're just jealous, Miya (2)
↳osamumiya You're just jealous, Miya (3)
↳astumumiya SAMU?!?
↳atsumumiya @aranojiro Help mee
↳aranojiro No
rinyn.crew OH MY FUCKING GOD!!!
ynfan16 idc what yall gonna say, THEY ARE THE IT COUPLE
↳ynfan17 AGREED
rareyn Go to Paris for PFW❎️
Go to Paris bcs is a big simp✅️
↳sunafan16 LMAO YES, I JUST REALISED HE GOT NO REASON TO BE IN PARIS😭
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48,926 likes
therinynpost RINYN STANS!! HOW ARE WE FEELING RN???
View all 3,958 comments
ynfan18 SO YOU'RE TELLING ME THAT THEY'RE IN LONDON RN?!?
↳sunafan17 RIN WASN'T JOKING WHEN HE ASKED HER TO TRAVEL AROUND EUROPE TOGETHER😭😭😭
ynfan19 THEY LOOK SO CUTE TOGETHER
sunafan18 FINALLY THEY FEEL COMFORTABLE TO BE SEEN IN PUBLIC. IM SO HAPPY FOR THEM
sunafan19 MY SHIP IS FINALLY SAILING
ynfan20 Love is in the air😭❤️
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dreamyyn GOOD NEWS EVERYONE!! Y/N WILL PLAY FOR A MOVIE DIRECTED BY THE ONE AND ONLY SHINSUKE KITA!!
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ynfan21 OMG I LOVE HIM SO MUCH!!! HES ONE OF THE BEST MOVIE DIRECTORS
ynfan22 OMGG WHERE CAN I READ THIS ARTICLE???
↳dreamyyn I just put the link in my story!
ynfan23 Y/N, RIN, KIYOKO, OSAMU IN ONE MOVIE?!? IM DEAD
ynfan24 OMG I'VE READ THE BOOK!! HE'S RIGHT! Y/N DEFINITELY WILL KILL THIS ROLE
ynfan25 You know you're a good actor when you could impress him😩
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tmz_tv Love is in the air for the newest A-list couple. Just a day after made their relationship Instagram official, they were seen together at The National Gallery in London. Link in bio for all we know about their romantic museum date.
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ynfan26 They're melting my heart😭❤️
sunafan20 I want them to last forever
sunafan21 M-museum date?!? I'm done. This can't be real. They're so in love
ynfan27 Rin, could we switch? Please, I BEG YOU
ynfan28 Parents 😩❤️
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yourinstagram *gasp* can you guys believe that now I'm part of these amazing casts?!? Thank you so much @.shinsukekita for cast me in this film *cry*
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kiyoko Yayyy, here we go! See you on set, angel<3
↳yourinstagram AAAA SEE YOUUU QUEEN<33
rintarousuna I'm stuck with you, ig
↳yourinstagram You can't get rid of me, baby
↳rinandyn.daily I WANT WHAT YOU TWO HAVE🥲
sunafan22 OMFG AAAAA YOU GONNA KILL THIS
ynfan29 Mr. Kita ain't playing with the casts😩
lndaydream IM SO PROUD OF YOU!! YOU DESERVE IT❤️❤️❤️
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rintarousuna Let’s celebrate the day you gave up on finding anyone better than me for the third time!
All jokes aside, I love you and thank you for being a good mom to our baby
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yourinstagram She's a beauty, no wonder you keep her all this time
↳rintarousuna Yeah I do gatekeep
ynfan30 IM NOT SURPRISED THAT YOU'RE TOGETHER. BUT 3 YEARS?!?!
sunafan23 PLEASE... I LOVE YOU GUYS SO MUCH😭❤️
ynfan31 God, when is my time🥲💔
sunafan24 MOM?? BABY??
↳rintarousuna I– not a human baby. You haven't seen the third pic, have you?
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yourinstagram Everyday I am grateful to have you. But here’s a post to prove it.
(Alternative caption: 26.280 hours and still counting✨️)
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tooruoikawa *gasp* I thought we were married? I'll make @primevideo fire you. Alexa, play traitor by olivia rodrigo
↳yourinstagram #ynisoverparty
↳rintarousuna Get lost, shittykawa
↳tooruoikawa HEY
↳ynfan32 PLS YOU GUYS... IM CRYING😭
hitokayachi love love looooveeee
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ynfan33 YOU TWO ARE THE CUTEST OMG
rinxyn Pls get married, I'm begging
sunafan25 Ramen date and flowers??? I'M CRYING. HE'S SO ROMANTIC😭
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↳sunafan25 SHUT UP. Y/N LIKED MY COMMENT?!?
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voguemagazine @yourinstagram is our November cover star! For this month’s issue, Vogue sat down with the actor in the middle of her busy schedule. L/N shared details of her quiet life in suburban areas and across Surrey during the filming of “I Know Places 2”, her unique way of dealing with fame and protecting her mental health, rumours that she's dating her co-star, her tricky teen years, and her upcoming films.
Head to the link in bio to get a sneak peek at her cover story in our upcoming November issue, on sale on Monday, October 24.
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ynfan34 @yourinstagram Girl... get some sleep
↳sunafan26 Ikr, new series, film, photoshoot, interview, and now magazine? 😭
↳yourinstagram I need to secure the bag, baby😔
↳ynfan34 AHSHSBDB OMGGGG PLS TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF!!!!
itsyn.update We are so proud of you❤️
ynfan35 You're the coolest😩❤️
Y/N via Vogue's website
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Academy Award winning couple Y/N L/N and Rintarou Suna have become one of our favorite celebrity couples; the two have been secretly dating for three years. The reason behind it is because, according to Y/N, she wasn't so sure about their relationship at the beginning.
She admits her initial concerns about dating the Japanese actor. “I was scared. I never dated anyone ever since I started my career. Which means, I’ve been single for almost a decade,” she confesses. “I had this thought like, ‘Are we going to get paparazzi’ed all the time? Should I be worried? What about our job and friendship? Am I not being professional?’”
L/N tells Vogue how grateful she is to have a boyfriend that understands how she felt and always supports her no matter what. However, as times goes by, she is letting the cat out of the bag since she doesn’t feel anxious anymore about “what people may say”.
Y/N also reveals that working with Rintarou makes her feel comfortable and one of the best things she has ever experienced. “I can not imagine anyone could replace him as my co-star. Besides, we’ve been friends for a year and have worked together as Coach brand ambassador.”
Then, the (H/C)-haired actress describes her relationship is as beautiful as daylight. Love to her is “golden”, it’s save, warm, and peaceful. “He doesn’t really enjoy going out too much. He loves to stay at home and feels secure. So when we have a free time, we just cuddling while watching a film,” she shares. “The rest? I’m just gonna keep that one a secret.”
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Another a/n: Pls keep in mind that I’m not a journalist or whatever. So if the “article” is cringe or not good enough, I’m sorry lol.
Taglist: @alienvarmint @iwaizumi-chan @rivaiken @tenaciouswritersheep @whorefornoodles @ssc7514 @jeanskanojo @jtaimeurmom @pinksilk @yachisupremacy @33765 @bukopandansalad @jjikyuu (some accounts can not be tagged, sorry)
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waitmyturtles · 8 months
Text
Turtles Catches Up With Old GMMTV: A Tale of Thousand Stars Loving Rewatch Edition
[What’s going on here? After joining Tumblr and discovering Thai BLs through KinnPorsche in 2022, I began watching GMMTV’s new offerings -- and realized that I had a lot of history to catch up on, to appreciate the more recent works that I was delving into. From tropes to BL frameworks, what we’re watching now hails from somewhere, and I’m learning about Thai BL's history through what I’m calling the Old GMMTV Challenge (OGMMTVC). Starting with recommendations from @absolutebl on their post regarding how GMMTV is correcting for its mistakes with its shows today, I’ve made an expansive list to get me through a condensed history of essential/classic/significant Thai BLs produced by GMMTV and many other BL studios. My watchlist, pasted below, lists what I’ve watched and what’s upcoming, along with the reviews I’ve written so far. Today, I write about my LOVING rewatch of one of the best BLs out there, ever, in A Tale of Thousand Stars.]
While I’ve been in the midst of a plethora of awesome new shows (Only Friends, Dangerous Romance), I’ve also been treating myself with some oldies. I just wrapped up a rewatch of Until We Meet Again, to prep for New Siwaj’s Absolute Zero that’s coming out this fall. And one of the joys that I set for myself in the course of structuring the Old GMMTV Challenge was to allow myself some loving rewatches of shows that I originally first consumed out of any chronological order, and/or out of total curiosity for the amount of space they generally take up on a daily basis on Tumblr, and/or for the amount of times that I had seen these particular shows listed as top examples of genre-defining or genre-transcending BLs. Those shows include Bad Buddy (of course), and A Tale of Thousand Stars.
Way, WAY back in the day -- November 2022, to be exact -- just a couple months into my joining Tumblr and actively blogging, I realized that this show called Moonlight Chicken was being bandied about excitedly, mostly in part because EarthMix and FirstKhao were going to be in it. I was intrigued, excited to participate in my first active Tumblr fandom from beginning to end, and I asked the Tumblr gods -- oh hey, should I watch A Tale of Thousand Stars first, to get to know Earth Pirapat and Mix Sahaphap first? And the answer was YES, so I did, and I totally loved it.
And of course, I look back at that review from almost a year ago, and I giggle, because while I picked up on a lot of the raw elements that make ATOTS great, I didn't have ANY context for why the show was transcendent vis à vis pre-existing BL tropes in the Thai BL genre, what it meant to be watching a classic Backaof Noppharnach show, what it meant for the show to be set in Northern Thailand, etc. I even wrote -- oh wow, I see why some of the elders on Tumblr are saying that there are shows way better than KinnPorsche out there (LOL, oh, hindsight). I didn't have any of that context.
Now, I do. And during my recent ATOTS rewatch, I just ATE, ATE, ATE, oh my god, I just sat and fucking ENJOYED this FABULOUS drama. I was yelling and gesturing to the screen -- oh god, WHY are you SO GOOD, YOU SHOW, YOU?! Man, oh man. It was a shit-ton of fun to start rewatching dramas that I already have nostalgia for, even if I only saw them for the first time last year.
Besides rewatching some of these important dramas back in chronological order through the OGMMTVC, I also have a mission in mind: to properly rewatch ATOTS and Bad Buddy before rewatching Our Skyy 2, which I've been wanting to do for a while. That rewatch will take place after I rewatch Bad Buddy in a couple of weeks. And I'm glad I waited until I could consume Aof's entire oeuvre, because I think his whole slate of shows -- not just ATOTS and BBS -- give us clues as to what was happening by way of Pat and Pran's relationship in OS2 before their physical separation in BBS that further explain the ATOTS and BBS universes. But more on this in a few weeks, when I get to my BBS and OS2 reviews.
Back to ATOTS. As I rewatched it -- in the context of the OGMMTVC, and what I've learned about the Thai television BL genre NOW, what were the elements of this show that stood out the most for me?
1) The striking use of flashbacks to tell a story. I know NOW shows that haven't used flashbacks as well to tell a compelling narrative -- for me, most recently, the biggest example is Double Savage (and maybe even KinnPorsche goes up there, too). Before ATOTS premiered, I think the BL that used flashbacks the BEST in its narrative was Until We Meet Again, which *needed* flashbacks to tell the entire scope of its intricate story, from past to present.
Something that I forgot about ATOTS until my rewatch was how very PACED the show was. I think I had it in my head that it was a slow-ish story, because -- again, it bucked a lot of BL trends and tropes, just like He's Coming To Me also did. No side couples. No university setting. No warring faculties and uniforms. When I first wrote about ATOTS in December 2022 -- after having watched The Eclipse as my first GMMTV BL -- I marveled at the singular storyline of Tian's life change and journey. There was a LOT we needed to know about Tian to GET where he was going, and where he wanted to go. What I didn't appreciate back then was how Aof TOLD the story.
Sure -- it could have frustrated some folks that we didn't get the truth of who was driving the car until much later in the series. But that would be missing the point of that piece of truth. Tian had blamed himself for Torfun's death the second he learned about it. It didn't *quite* matter who was driving the car -- what mattered was the self-blame he assigned himself to, and the journey he thought he needed to take to absolve himself of the guilt that he carried.
The structure was beyond sharp, and just INCREDIBLY compelling. Between UWMA and ATOTS, we have two tremendous dramas that flirted with VERY risky past-to-future infrastructures, and both succeeded exceedingly well.
2) Phupha and Tian's TERRIBLE communication. I'm serious! Oh my god, y'all. Did we appreciate back then how AWFUL they are at communicating? HA! Our Skyy 2 obviously emphasized this even more -- Tian himself accuses Phupha of not being open enough to tell Tian why Phupha won't meet Tian's parents.
But, holy shit, these two guys are such drama bastards. By episode 9, I had to write in my notes, in all caps: THESE ASSHOLES ARE SUCH AWFUL COMMUNICATORS. If one person wasn't angry at the other, and avoiding the other person, then something was off in their world. Tian's titchyness, Phupha's avoidance, played against each other like opposing magnets.
And yet: of course, we know WHY they are bad communicators. We know that Phupha grew up in a traditional, rural household -- one that likely wasn't welcoming to his inner truth as a queer man.
Tian grew up in a privileged and patriarchal household that disguised itself as a matriarchal household. Now THAT shit's confusing. What Tian was to do with his life, as assigned by his parents, supposedly came from his mom -- but it was his dad that enforced those rules. Who could Tian go to to talk about his own growing inner truth as well? Not to either of his parents, who both had designs on who *exactly* Tian should be by way of their own demands and outward-facing lives.
So these two men -- both of whom barely had any practice in expressing their inner truths, their raw feelings about themselves, their life situations, and each other -- are figuring out their emotional shit vis à vis each other, for the first time in their lives. And what we get, gloriously, is a whole bunch of damn hilarious drama that left me shaking my head and laughing a bunch. They were SO passive-aggressive with each other, I had to applaud EarthMix.
And through their bad communication came so many resolutions to each storyline -- the illegal merchants, the revelation of Torfun's death and the story behind it -- that what we ultimately got to see were life-defining moments for both Tian and Phupha of utter growth. The trade-off between those dramatic anguishes and the TRUE drama of the show itself -- was well worth it, and brilliantly done.
3) The metaphor of freedom. We know, now, that Bad Buddy was existing in the same world as ATOTS.
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God, I LOVE what Aof pulled in Our Skyy 2 by way of the Nong Nao eye mask (Tian even wears the Nong Nao eye mask!) -- because in rewatching ATOTS, I would have NEVER clocked that Tian was talking about his own freedom through his OWN eye mask.
We know now that Tian and Pran, in their respective shows, were on their own paths to freedom -- both from demanding families that demanded that each of them comport to absolute idealistic images of what perfect sons DID in those family structures. Both Tian and Pran have overbearing mothers with complicit fathers who demand exacting obedience. And both Tian and Pran ultimately sought freedom from that pressure.
In episode 9, I clocked a message on Tian's tote bag -- I can't get a clear-enough screenshot of it (it's in the 3/4 segment), but the tote bag says, "what is the meaning of free?" All of ATOTS is based on Tian's journey to emotional freedom -- freedom from his parents' expectations, freedom from the guilt he carries from Torfun's death.
An interesting comparison to UWMA happens in episode 5, when Tian asks about his growing feelings towards Phupha: "I don't know if these feelings are mine or Torfun's." And, of course -- combine that with what Tian needs to reckon with at the cliff in episode 9, when Tian is struggling with figuring how who's life he's truly living. As Tian separates himself from his parents -- as Tian understands his needs vs. Torfun's needs -- what Tian's struggle ultimately comes down to is, who is he really living his life for? Torfun saved him, his parents bought him the transplant -- but what does that actually mean for the meaning that Tian brings to his own life, and to the lives of others, including Phupha?
What Tian ultimately realizes is that needs freedom from the influence of everyone and everything around him to gain clarity as to who HE truly is. That, to me, is the ultimate core message of ATOTS -- it is Tian's defining journey towards the freedom that only he himself can find, vis à vis Torfun, Phupha, and Pha Pun Dao.
But because Aof is so good at wrenching our hearts with every last bit of energy he’s got: he showed us that Tian was able to come to this conclusion, ultimately, through Phupha, and Phupha's love for Tian.
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ATOTS is a wonderful coming-of-age story, but without the typical cheesiness that that structure can often bring. It's a story of individual and internal change that we know gets echoed, expanded, and transformed in Bad Buddy through Pran. I see now that ATOTS and Bad Buddy are Aof's deep studies of internal maturing, both told through queer revelations, through empathic love with a rock-solid partner, and through fights against oppressive societal and familial resistances to living one's full truth.
Way, way back when -- and thank goodness for the OGMMTVC for allowing me to dive into this -- Aof depicted queer men living their very robust truths in Gay OK Bangkok. As I wrote in my GOKB review, what happened after the premiere of GOKB is that Aof went to the BL genre to begin slowly changing it, to make the genre a true home for real queer revelation and introspection. Did he ever nail it in ATOTS. Did he ever expand it in BBS. Watching ATOTS felt like coming home, because once again (as in HCTM) -- Aof defied typical expectations of the genre to get honest about what an internal reality of being queer could really be like. And to do that in Thai television BL, with all the tropes and expectations the genre had created by the time of ATOTS's airing in 2021, was remarkable.
Hearing the theme song, seeing Pha Pun Dao and the villagers (AND THE CHILDREN! I LOVE THOSE CHILDREN!), seeing the schoolhouse, seeing Earth in his forest ranger uniform, hearing the original source of the forest ranger t-shirt joke, seeing Rang and Yod again -- man, was it ever nostalgic to rewatch ATOTS, even after having seen the guys in Our Skyy 2. This show is SUCH a classic, SUCH a must-watch of the very highest order, and the fact that it does NOT shy away from a very real and difficult emotional journey is only just a part of what makes it one of the enduring diamonds of Thai BL.
[We'll return to Pha Pun Dao in a couple weeks once I get through my Bad Buddy and Our Skyy 2 rewatches -- stay tuned!
In the meantime, my review of Lovely Writer is on deck for next week. By far this is my favorite Tee Bundit drama. For the sake of my fellow drama clowns, I am giving I Feel You Linger in the Air a shot, but the editing choices are giving me slight Step By Step-PTSD. I'm gonna keep a close eye on this one.
But Lovely Writer is Tee's anomaly, and what a fabulously genius anomaly it is. I can't wait to get into it, and if you loved it, too, and you have NOT watched the Lovely Writer special episode, PLEASE watch the special ep, as I'll be referring to it -- it has a super important conclusion that wraps up the entire series beautifully.
A heads-up that I may need to take a week's break or so in early September.... hopefully I won't, but I am moving, so while I'm ahead on a few dramas, getting pen to paper has proven difficult by way of time. Hopefully this project won't be delayed too much -- but send me your best big ups nonetheless as I move domiciles!
In the meantime, here's the list -- as always, I welcome your feedback! (Tumblr's new web editor is jacking with the list below and not allowing me to strikethrough the shows I've watched. For the very latest updated list, please click here!)
1) The Love of Siam (2007) (movie) (review here) 2) My Bromance (2014) (movie) (review here) 3) Love Sick and Love Sick 2 (2014 and 2015) (review here) 4) Gay OK Bangkok Season 1 (2016) (a non-BL queer series directed by Jojo Tichakorn and written by Aof Noppharnach) (review here) 5) Make It Right (2016) (review here) 6) SOTUS (2016-2017) (review here) 7) Gay OK Bangkok Season 2 (2017) (a non-BL queer series directed by Jojo Tichakorn and written by Aof Noppharnach) (review here) 8) Make It Right 2 (2017) (review here) 9) Together With Me (2017) (review here) 10) SOTUS S/Our Skyy x SOTUS (2017-2018) (review here) 11) Love By Chance (2018) (review here) 12) Kiss Me Again: PeteKao cuts (2018) (no review) 13) He’s Coming To Me (2019) (review here) 14) Dark Blue Kiss (2019) and Our Skyy x Kiss Me Again (2018) (review here) 15) TharnType (2019-2020) (review here) 16) Senior Secret Love: Puppy Honey (OffGun BL cuts) (2016 and 2017) (no review) 17) Theory of Love (2019) (review here) 18) 3 Will Be Free (2019) (a non-BL and an important harbinger of things to come in 2019 and beyond re: Jojo Tichakorn pushing queer content in non-BLs) (review here) 19) Dew the Movie (2019) (review here) 20) Until We Meet Again (2019-2020) (review here) 21) 2gether (2020) and Still 2gether (2020) (review here) 22) I Told Sunset About You (2020) (review here) 23) YYY (2020, out of chronological order) (review here) 24) Manner of Death (2020-2021) (not a true BL, but a MaxTul queer/gay romance set within a genre-based show that likely influenced Not Me and KinnPorsche) (review here) 25) A Tale of Thousand Stars (2021) (review here) 26) A Tale of Thousand Stars (2021) OGMMTVC Fastest Rewatch Known To Humankind For The Sake Of Rewatching Our Skyy 2 x BBS x ATOTS  27) Lovely Writer (2021) (review coming) 28) Last Twilight in Phuket (2021) (the mini-special before IPYTM) (review coming) 29) I Promised You the Moon (2021) (review coming) 30) Not Me (2021-2022) (watching) 31) Bad Buddy (2021-2022) (thesis here) 32) 55:15 Never Too Late (2021-2022) (not a BL, but a GMMTV drama that features a macro BL storyline about shipper culture and the BL industry) 33) Bad Buddy (2021-2022) and Our Skyy 2 x BBS x ATOTS (2023) OGMMTVC Rewatch 34) Secret Crush On You (2022) [watching for Cheewin’s trajectory of studying queer joy from Make It Right (high school), to SCOY (college), to Bed Friend (working adults)] 35) KinnPorsche (2022) (tag here) 36) KinnPorsche (2022) OGMMTVC Fastest Rewatch Known To Humankind For The Sake of Re-Analyzing the KP Cultural Zeitgeist 37) The Eclipse (2022) (tag here) 38) GAP (2022-2023) (Thailand’s first GL) 39) My School President (2022-2023) and Our Skyy 2 x My School President (2023) 40) Moonlight Chicken (2023) (tag here) 41) Bed Friend (2023) (tag here) (Cheewin’s latest show, depicting a queer joy journey among working adults) 42) Be My Favorite (2023) (tag here) (I’m including this for BMF’s sophisticated commentary on Krist’s career past as a BL icon) 43) Only Friends (2023)]
40 notes · View notes
fandxmslxt69 · 18 days
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CLEM!!!
Happy birthday, lovely! I hope you're happy and healthy! So sorry I didn't see your post earlier, I've been having a very hectic year with studying, working and just generalized stuff! BUT BUT I couldn't send you a inbox!
So like a said: HAPPY BIRTHDAY! you are one of the sweetest mutuals ever! And to celebrate that a gotta ask
What is your latest read?
And I want to know your all time favorite Jason fics, please with links and all!
LOVE OF MY LIFE HELLO!!!
OMG PLS DONT APOLOGISE I KNOW HOW HECTIC LIFE CAN GET!! i hope you are taking good care of yourself, resting and relax outside of studies and work!!! remember that none of it matters if you aren't feeling good <33
MY LATEST READ OKAY
um truth be told my love i have been in SUCH a slump lately,,,, its been tough out here.
i only read like 3 books very recently (last month or so)
I did read All The Little Raindrops by Mia Sheridan my QUEEN. its like a mystery thriller with a side of romance!!! Sheridan's books are ALWAYS a hit (she's very popular for her booktok famous Archer's Voice? And Travis !!) I've read like. most of her books at this point. I have never devoted myself to an author so much. She got me into the whole thriller genre and I LOVE her. so much. ITS SO GOOD AAAA. its not for the faint of heart and on more than once i find myself with the need to throw up with how HORRIFYING and messed up some of this stuff is (most of her thriller books are not for the faint of heart. lots of horrific stuff that is all too real and it makes it 10x more disturbing). Anyway i loved it i think i gave it a 4/5 stars it was so so good
2. i ALSO started Ana Huang's If Love series. I literally never shut up about Ana Huang like. EVER and i had been wanting to read this for a while and IM SO GLAD I GOT IT STARTED !!! Its a LOT less popular than hr Twisted and Kings of Sin series; she wrote it well before she got popular/published but its so good. its def not Twisted/Kings of Sin series but it makes it sooo clear how much she's grown in her writing, character development and general story telling!!! I read the first 2 books and UGHGUGHUFGHUFGHG yeah. new comfort series fr fr fr fr.
I also got digging through Lynn Painter's works (Love Wager, Mr Wrong Number, Better Than The Movies, etc) 10/10 her rom coms are sacred to me. this was a while ago though like. months ago lmao but i think abt her books always!!!
OH OH OMG I READ BIRTHDAY GIRL BY PENELOPE DOUGLAS !!!! SOME TIME AGO!!! yeah it changed my brain chemistry. i dont remember if i told you or not. but it changed my life. i think about it always.
edit: omg shut up i forgot i read some banger books months ago that i did not mention. i ate up Liz Tomforde's sports romance series (Windy City series) it was SO FREAKING GOOD. she had hockey romance, she had basketball romance she had BASEBALL ROMANCE. 10/10 amazing vibes
I ate through the latest of Lauren Asher's (Love Redesigned) IT WAS ALSO HELLA GOOD!! Ana Huang's King of Greed was also a vibe. not my fav but it was good. I ALSO delved into hockey romance SOOO DEEP. Fav series is probably Becka Mack's Playing For Keeps. It's the silliest stupidest fluffy no plot head empty series ever. the first book is 90% porn. its just for the giggles. the second is a bit better but the third is def the best in terms of actual plot & character development for example but the vibes are astronomical and i live for them
i ALSO started reading Sarah Adam's small town romance series (very very good). All fluffy fall vibes. CHLOE GONG HAD COME OUT WITH A NEW BOOK IN THE SUMMER AND I GOT TO IT AROUND THE NEW YEAR AND IT WAS SOOO GOOOD. Immortal Longings mm......she destroyed me once again.
OKAY ALL TIME FAV JASON FICS ok i dont have links (is lazy to go find links) but i will tell you two blogs im like religiously stalking:
@in-som-niyah has AMAZING THOUGHTS on Jason 10/10 i love getting all my jason content from her GOD BLESS THE HARDWORKING PEOPLE OF TUMBLR DOT COM
@fcthots also has some kick ass Jason stuff....like....from smutty to fluffy and domestic its....yeah. oooghgubjgubgn yeah yeah.
anyway i've probably forgotten to mention a bunch of books but thats all i can remember that was actually good. HOW HAVE YOU BEEN WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN READING !!!
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whumpsday · 1 year
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K&J x MMSS 2: Valen & Liz Part 1
Kane & Jim masterlist / Magnanimous Moonrise & Savage Sunset masterlist
content: starvation, blood, nonconsensual restraint, muzzle/gag, aftermath of torture, misgendering a nonbinary character (non-malicious), mentions of rape/noncon, rescue, recovery, vampire whumpee
Note: This is NOT a continuation of the first KJ x MMSS crossover.
Set after K&J #39: Heat Wave Part 2 and after/diverges from 6M/6S
me and @not-a-space-alien are back with another collab!! part 2 will be posted tomorrow! nasa did pretty much all the editing on this one, so huge thanks to them!!
also: i included the taglists for both stories in the first crossover bc i thought it would be a one-and-done thing, but it’s looking like we’re gonna be putting out a bunch of stuff. as such, i will be including the taglists on this and the second part tomorrow as well, but if you’d like to continue being tagged in crossover pieces, please comment saying so in order to remain on the taglist! it’s opt-in! and as the next crossover will be 18+, please be 18+ to enter the taglist for that.
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Liz hasn't been able to stop thinking about the vampire since she heard about him.
Valen Kithrara. If any vampires deserved to get what's coming to them, it's the Kithrara family. But Kane… Kane's a horrible person, too. He took away the only family she had left, methodically destroyed Jim's spirit until he was a paranoid, crying mess who took years to build himself back up. An abusive piece of shit who by all accounts deserves to die. And yet, as much as she hates to admit it, as much as she hates him, she can't help but feel bad for the guy. She even let him stay in her house for a few days during that heat wave fiasco last month, so it's safe to say they're fine now, she guesses.
If she can be fine with her brother's abuser who she still fucking hates, she can stop this random vampire she doesn't even know from being tortured, no matter what he'd done.
She's going to kill Valen Kithrara. Put the guy out of his misery. In and out, that's the plan. No more fucked up torture, especially when the person she heard about it from said he heard that all the useful “experiments” had been done months ago and it was basically just senseless at this point. She was able to get ahold of the schedule of that base, and it's supposed to be empty tonight. In and out.
When she gets there, she curses under her breath. There's a car out front. Someone's still here. No one's supposed to be here, but then again, neither is she.
She knocks on the door.
Nick answers. He's breathing slightly heavily, and looks caught off guard. "Er, can I help you?"
Oh, this guy is definitely hiding something. Perfect. All Liz has to do is get him to let her down there and she can stake the vampire. He won't want to admit he was even here, and if he does, she can just say the vampire attacked her. It'd be her word against his. "Hey, I'm Beth. I'm from a different branch a few hours out. I happened to be in town, and remembered hearing you guys have a live vampire here. I'm toootally interested in the experiments you're running. I gotta get going tonight, but I figured I'd swing by to take a look if that's okay, see what your setup is so maybe we can get some research going back in my county," she bullshits, giving him a friendly smile.
Nick narrows his eyes. "Are you on duty? Where is your hunting partner?"
"Nah, not on duty. Definitely don't do that shit alone." She laughs. God, she hadn't even told Laken she was doing this. She'll tell them after. "Just in town for personal business. Why, you guys understaffed and want me to pick up a shift?”
Nick blinks at her. "No, nothing like that. You may look, as long as you don't touch anything. I will warn you safely keeping a vampire in a setup like this involves a fair amount of homemade equipment. I made it all myself. I would be happy to share the blueprints with you if you have someone with the technical know-how to recreate them." He opens the door and lets her in, walking to the basement and unlocking the door.
"Cool, thanks!" Liz forces herself to sound enthusiastic, despite knowing she's about to see something truly awful, and follows him inside. What awaits her is something out of a horror movie. The room is filled with torture devices, and Valen himself- god, he looks even worse than Kane did, and completely terrified.
It's at that moment she realizes that she won't be able to do it. On the job, she kills strong vampires who fight her back. She can't bring herself to kill someone so utterly helpless and scared. Which means everything is suddenly a lot more complicated.
"So, what's that thing you've got it locked up in?" she asks.
Nick sits on the lid of the coffin, near Valen's feet. Valen begins to sob, titling his head to make eye contact with Liz. He can't speak, but the message is clear enough from the big, watery eyes. Please, please please please. "It's a shell of silver-core bars coated with iron, with internal restraints. We call it the coffin. The director insists that safety is our topmost priority, but this satisfies even him to know that this vampire isn't going anywhere. It would have to break through two layers of silver restraints, then remove the muzzle on its face before being able to use persuasion. And as a precaution, we never open the coffin unless at least two people are present."
"Well, shit, we've got two people here right now. I could spot you if you wanted to try anything out." The gossip she'd heard included that the guy doing the experiments could hardly even find anyone to go with him anymore because everyone was sick of his shit. "I'd love to see your work in action and everything, if you've got the time."
Nick stares at her. "Please show me your credentials. I could be fired if I didn't ensure the second party was qualified to supervise."
"Of course, yeah." Liz fishes out her hunting license. Elizabeth Lieberman, it reads. She's glad she chose an alias that works with her ID, but with the way her plan is evolving, she's becoming less sure whatever secret reason he's here right now would be enough to keep him from reporting her when she does what she's about to do. But she can't leave this guy here, she can't. She'll just have to figure it out. Get people to cover for her. "I don't think I ever got your name, by the way?"
"Nicholas." He examines the ID and apparently finds it to his satisfaction. He then gives it back, and walks over to the furnace, lighting it and setting the stoneware cup of silver in it to melt. This prompts a fresh round of sobbing from Valen, and him writhing inside the cage, but the device is too heavy for it to even shake under his thrashing.
Nick comes back and sits on the coffin again, crossing his legs. "Elizabeth Lieberman? It's nice to meet you. I don't suppose you're related to Jim Lieberman?"
"Nice to meet you too. Yeah, he's my brother. Got an apprenticeship a couple months after he got taken, started hunting the second I turned 18, never looked back." It's easier to say something genuine than lie through her teeth. What the fuck, is this guy gonna pour silver on him? Why? It's not like hunters could carry around molten silver. "How'd you get into it?"
"Interesting. I've always been fascinated by Jim's story. The two of you are very strong." Nick pulls down his shirt collar to reveal the scars from fang marks on the side of his neck. "I relate to Jim's story on a personal level. That is what got me into hunting." He releases the shirt. "I'm not a proper hunter, though. I don't have a hunting partner. I'm simply an affiliate of the guild. I do research and support."
Liz figured. The guy isn't built like a hunter. She's trained for this work half her life, and it shows. She knows she can take him easily. Hearing his story makes her feel wildly guilty about that, though. God, if he's been through what Jim's been through… well, if she does this right, he won't even know what hit him until he wakes up with a bad headache. And she can't just leave this vampire here.
"Congrats on getting out. That takes guts." She means it. She guesses that's the kind of thing that could drive someone to… this. "I think your silver might be done."
Nick smiles widely. "Thank you. Jim's book mentioned how much you two missed each other. I imagine you must feel the same hatred towards vampires as I do. As many of us do. If you'd like to assist, typically I have someone handle the vampire while I handle the equipment." He hands her a key, then he walks over to the furnace and holds the long metal tongs with the glowing silver on the end. "All you need to do is hold it still on the ground. Kneeling on the shoulders usually works well."
Liz stuffs the key in her pocket, grabs the stake off her belt, and slams the blunt end into the side of his head while he's turned around. She grabs him as he falls, making sure the molten silver that clatters to the floor doesn't get on him. "Sorry, Nicholas," she says softly, setting him down in the chair in front of the desk.
She re-sheathes her stake, pulls out the key, and approaches Valen. "Hey, buddy. Let's get you outta this mess." She unlocks the coffin, undoes the restraints, and helps him out of it.
Valen watches her approach the coffin through a haze. He'd been mentally preparing for more torture, and now this muscular, god-like woman had attacked his abuser, and is now approaching him like an angel descending with kind words. This is a dream, right? Was this really happening?
He is completely limp in her hands, in a daze. His cheeks are flushed. As soon as her hands are on him, he decides he's a little bit in love with her.
Liz decides to leave the cuffs on, and obviously the muzzle is staying. This isn't Kane. The collar won't come off on its own, so she checks Nicholas's pocket and finds his keys. After a couple tries, she finds the right one, leaving it inside the coffin before closing the lid. "Bet that's better, huh? C'mon, my truck's just outside. Let's get you up the stairs." It's obvious that Valen can't move that well on his own, and she supports him as they make their way up.
Before they leave the base, she stops. "Valen, right? Okay, a couple ground rules. I'm helping you because torture is fucked up, but I'm still a hunter. I will kill you if you give me a reason to. No attacking, no trying to take that off-" Liz points to his muzzle. "No trying to run off. Not that you really can right now, but that'll change. You don't hurt me and I won't hurt you. Sound good?"
Valen is so overwhelmed by what's happening. He'd just been sitting there, being subjected to another of Nick's night visits, when this hunter strides in and upends everything all at once. It’s different, and that scares him, a lot. He has no idea who this person is, or what they’re going to do to him, but… She said torture is fucked up. So it could be good. Maybe this was over? His brain refuses to register it. It feels like he’s wading through molasses trying to figure out what he should be feeling. His usual internal stream of pleas has been completely silenced by how suddenly everything had pivoted. He's never even seen this hunter before. The muzzle is staying on, so obviously things weren't going to be too good, but…
Cheeks still rosy, eyes wide with fear and hope, he nods silently.
"Good." Liz takes him to the truck, trying to decide on the best place for him. It would be a lot better if she had a trunk, but her only options are the passenger seat, the backseat, or the bed. The first two left her vulnerable to attack- Valen would lose, but she would be driving and that was dangerous as shit. The bed left him wide-open for escape.
She considers going back and getting the coffin, for a moment, but… instead, she sighs and just loads him into the passenger seat and buckles him in. He really doesn't seem like he'll attack. "There we go," she says, before climbing into the driver's seat. "Name's Liz, by the way. I live about three hours away, so get comfortable. And hey: you're out. Take a minute to celebrate it." She gives him a smile and a pat on the shoulder before getting on the road.
You're out. Is that what's happening? It must be, right? Valen lets his head lean into the window, bonking against the glass. He's out. He's away from Nick. He's away from Nick. He starts to cry softly with relief. He's still a prisoner, it's not over, but this seems like it's going to be better. He can hope for that. Maybe it's a lie, he has no reason to trust this person, but she is the first one to say what's happening to him is fucked up and do something to put a stop to it. But where is she taking him…? To her house?
Out of the corner of his eye, he watches her strong-looking hands on the steering wheel and working the gear-shift. He keeps replaying in his mind over and over the sensation of her lifting him up, helping him up the stairs, touching him gently to get him up into the seat and buckle him in. What can I do to make you want to protect me? Anxiety creeps over him.
Liz isn't very talkative on the drive home. She's a little on-edge with a vampire just sitting right next to her while she's driving after having fought so many, and keeps glancing at Valen to make sure he's still chill. She calms down once they finally get to her house. She's glad the timing is good- it's late at night, and no one is out, especially not in a town so close to vampire territory, so no one can see her taking a vampire into her house.
"Alright, we're home." She helps Valen into the house, sitting him on her couch. "I'll be honest, I wasn't expecting to take a vampire home tonight, so I'm a little unprepared. Looks like you need… a bath, some clothes, and a meal, for starters." She reaches toward his face. "Not gonna hurt you, just checking out that muzzle," she warns. This isn't Liz's first rodeo, and she's assuming Valen must be at least as jumpy as Jim was when he first came home. The more assurances, the better. She grabs his chin and tilts his head a little, getting a good look of the thing. It doesn't seem locked, which is a major safety hazard she'd have to fix. He wouldn't be able to drink normally with it on, but… "Yeah, I can probably get a straw in there."
Valen's eyes light up with delight when she says this. She's going to feed him? Really? That makes him a little nervous--feed him for what? Dare he believe just because she didn't want to see him starving? And a bath, and clothes… Things you would give a person, and not a piece of meat. It almost feels wrong. It almost feels too much to hope for. Silent tears dribble down his cheeks again, tears of relief. Maybe he could convince her to take the muzzle off. Maybe she wouldn't feel the need to keep him locked up so tight. Maybe, maybe, maybe. Maybe he could be a person and not a piece of meat.
Fuck, he really does remind her of Jim at 24. "Hey, it's gonna be alright." Liz grabs a tissue from the box on the side table and hands it to him. 
He remembers tissues, a relic from an era when he could blow his nose. He takes the tissue and dabbles delicately at his eyes.
"Let's… okay. Blood first, probably. Hmm." She'd heard Jim tell her how Kane jumped on him when he got a papercut, so this guy definitely wouldn't be able to control himself. "I'm gonna have to tie you up first, just for this first time- maybe first few times- to make sure everything goes smoothly. Stay there, lemme work this out."
She's able to scour something along the lines of rope from her camping gear, winding it around his legs and torso firmly and tying it off where he can't reach. Even if he tried to lunge at her, he'd just end up on the floor. "I'll take that off after your dinner. Just try to relax. It'll be fine."
Valen whines softly as Liz approaches him with rope, and starts to sob as she ties him up. It's not painful, it's not even unpleasant except psychologically. More restraints, more tying, more barriers between him and being a person who talks and laughs and says please and thank you and I love you. She tells him to try to relax and it'll be fine, but he can't make his brain believe it. It won't be fine. It's never fine. It's always worse. Things had been getting better, and now they were getting worse again.
Liz passes through the doorway into the kitchen. She'll get a blood draw kit tomorrow, but this will have to do for now. She cuts into her arm, bleeding into a cup.
As soon as the blood is outside of Liz's body, Valen does exactly as she'd predicted, lunging and ending up on the floor. His eyes are wild and predatory, nostrils flaring, and his cuffed hands gouge the floor, raking his claws in an attempt to drag himself forward, growling savagely.
Liz glances back, seeing Valen worming around on the floor. It must be awful to be that desperate for food. She fills about half a cup, which takes longer than she thought it would, before bandaging her arm- first with gauze, then with plastic wrap, to hopefully control the smell a little bit. She hopes Valen is able to control himself a little more after he's finished this. She grabs a straw and heads back to the vampire.
"Valen." He barely seems to hear her. Liz grabs him by the bound wrists to make sure she won't get scratched and pulls him up into a sitting position. She straddles his legs to keep him from moving around so much, then sticks the straw through the muzzle and into his mouth as he strains for the cup. "Fuck, finally. Drink up."
As soon as the straw is in his mouth it's like he's a completely different animal. He sucks and the blood rushes into his mouth, warm and wet. His face instantly loosens into a placid expression, eyelids heavy, lost in the sensation. His eyes flicker to Liz, straddling him. Oh hello, where did you come from, big angel? Thank you. Thank you. He feels the blood warming his frigid insides as it goes down his throat. Thank you. Thank you.
The blood is gone far too fast. The straw wheezes emptily against the dredges at the bottom, Valen still sucking, refusing to admit he's finished.
"Yeah, I get that's probably not enough. Here, lemme turn it around so you can get at the bottom of the straw." Liz pulls the straw from Valen's mouth, flips it, and sticks the blood-covered end back in. After it looks like he's done, she pulls it back out, getting off of him. "I know it sucks, but that's all I've got for you right now. I'll get you more tomorrow."
When Liz lets him lick the straw to get a little extra, he almost starts crying again. She's putting so much thought into his comfort it's almost too much to bear. Ideally he'd like to be allowed to lick the bottom of the cup as well, but he knows why Liz won't let him do that. Please take the muzzle off. I promise it'll be fine. He's starting to have the thought with increasing certainty. Before, back with Nick, he knew for a fact that the second anyone took the muzzle off he'd be using persuasion instantly to try and save himself, but…the urgency to do that was starting to fade, here. Maybe he didn't need to. Maybe they could just have a normal conversation. It’s too good to be true, of course, but it’s a nice thought.
Liz rinses the cup, then returns to untie Valen, helping him off the floor. "Alright. Bathtime, pajamas, then bed. We'll figure the rest out tomorrow. You'll be okay." She helps him upstairs, into her parents' old room. There's a queen-size bed, a bunch of boxes (as she uses it for storage), and an attached bathroom. "This is gonna be your bedroom and your bathroom. I'll get all the boxes and shit out of here at some point this week." She continues helping him to the bathroom.
When she takes him upstairs, he starts to feel a little anxious again as Liz takes him into a bedroom. But Liz is a woman. Even if she did that, it probably wouldn't hurt. It probably wouldn't even be unpleasant. Maybe he would even like it. He thinks about it for a little longer than he probably should, before he realizes what she is saying. Oh, he's getting a bedroom, and a bathroom, and pajamas. That's good, right? He wants that. He starts to bounce a little with excitement. He's getting amenities. Maybe this is okay.
Liz starts filling the tub with warm water, then gestures to Valen's boxers. "You want me to help you get those off, you wanna do it yourself, or you wanna leave 'em on?" She holds up a new finger with each option, indicating for him to do the same to pick which he wants.
He's going to get a bath, but oh, he has to pass the trial of making a decision first. At this point he couldn't care less about his boxers. He has no modesty left, no dignity to scrape up to try and save. He holds up one finger, to ask her to do it, then immediately feels anxious about if that was the wrong thing to do.
"Alrighty, here we go." Liz helps Valen get the boxers off, then helps him into the tub. The cuffs and muzzle are still on, since Liz is afraid he'll take the muzzle off if his hands are free. "I know leaving the cuffs on isn't ideal, but I gotta look out for my own safety too. We just met and all. I promise I'll figure out something better tomorrow, you'll get your hands free. I'll help you get cleaned up for today, though."
She washes his hair and body, trying to be mindful of any injuries, making sure to get under the cuffs and muzzle too. At one point, she presses the washcloth into his hands so he can wash anything below the belt himself.  She has to prompt him to do his own washing a few times before he has the wherewithal to do anything for himself.
After, she helps him into a set of pretty basic pajamas- she does unlock the cuffs briefly so she can get the shirt on, but they go right back on after. "Sorry, I know. It's temporary."
Valen leans into her touches, and at whatever point it's feasible, he leans into her, face into her shoulder, sighing contentedly, clinging to her with his bound hands if she allows it. It's probably pathetic. But he wants to say thank you, and he can't, and it's really, really disappointing when the cuffs don't stay off, but he feels cared for in a way he hasn't in a long time. Not safe, but safer. 
The pajamas are nice--any fabric would be a little scratchy against his injuries, but they're soft and warm, neither of which are anything he's gotten to experience in a while. He sits on the bed, feeling acutely the stark clash between the comforting, gentle pajamas and the hard metal cuffs just a few inches above the sleeves at his wrists.
God, he absolutely breaks Liz's heart. Before sending Valen to bed, she gives him a hug, now reasonably certain he'd want that. He seems desperate for any kind of gentle touch. “It's gonna be alright. It's over. No one's gonna hurt you here." She really feels like she's 20 all over again.
He really, really wants to believe her words. Maybe it's a lie, but for now, in this moment, it's true, and that helps him carry on for a little while.
When Liz leaves him alone to go to bed, he lies down in the luxurious softness of a real bed, but finds to his horror he can't sleep. He's out in the open. That means danger. This is horrible because he starts to realize the solution would be to be shut back in the coffin, which he would hate more than anything, but it's been his only rest and safety for months, training his brain to equate a narrow, enclosed space with sleep and safety.
But he's so tired he wants to cry. Is there anything he could do to possibly recreate this sensation? A weighted blanket maybe? There's nothing. The bathtub? The underside of the bed looks tall enough for him to squeeze under, but he doesn't want to leave the softness and warmth of the blankets.
Whimpering, he pulls the comforter off the bed and wraps himself up in it as best as he can, steps onto the floor, and kneels down, jamming himself under the bed and wriggling forward until most of his body is under it. He almost hopes it doesn't work because this is a less than ideal sleeping position, but he does eventually fall asleep.
Liz calls Laken until they wake up and pick up the phone, confesses everything, and tells them to cover for her. Laken is completely on board, and she goes to sleep too, knowing that Nicholas's "a hunter a 3 hour drive away came to steal my vampire for no apparent reason" story will likely not hold up against her "I was literally home all night and I've got people backing that up," especially when he's the one with head trauma and there's no evidence she was there.
The next day, Liz goes to check on Valen, only to find him missing. "Fuck! Where the hell did he go?!"
Valen is awoken by Liz's startled exclamation. Oh no, she thinks I ran off. He starts wriggling forward, but finds he's a little bit stuck. He grips the carpet fiercely and drags himself forward a little, getting his head and shoulders out from under the bed, letting out muffled exclamations to let her know where he is.
Liz rubs the sleepiness out of her eyes with a sigh of relief. "Oh. You do that too, huh?" At least he's coming out on his own, not needing to be coaxed out like Jim did.
You do that too, huh? Did……did Liz sleep under her bed? Why on earth would she do that?
She pulls him the rest of the way out. "Alright, game plan for today. I've gotta go do some shopping, I've got a friend coming over while I'm out. They're gonna feed you, too. After I get back, we'll get those cuffs off, sound good?"
Someone is coming over while Liz is out. That makes him nervous, but excited because they're going to feed him. He wants to ask if it'll be a man or a woman. Liz had said they. Was it just one friend or multiple friends? Realistically it won't really make much difference the gender of the person, or people, but it will let him know how nervous to feel, being alone in the house with someone new in this state. He decides to assume it'll be a man, this way he'll be pleasantly surprised instead of caught off guard if he's wrong, but immediately regrets it, beginning to shake with nerves.
They're coming over to feed you, not hurt you. Calm the fuck down.
But what if they didn't just feed him? Liz was taking the cuffs off, not the muzzle. He's still stuck having no way to tell anyone if something is wrong.
Still, he nods with enthusiasm at the prospect of the cuffs coming off.
Liz takes Valen down to the living room couch, and Laken arrives shortly after. "Hey!" they greet cheerily. "Jesus Christ, you look like you've been through the wringer. What's up, I'm Laken." They hold out a hand for Valen to potentially shake.
"He can't even answer that." Liz points out.
Oh, it's a man. Great. Awesome. Valen dies inside, ready to lie down and take whatever was going to happen to him as soon as Liz leaves. It was obvious Valen wouldn't be able to do anything about it, either resist in the moment or tell on him afterwards.
Valen's countenance shifts visibly and immediately, shoulders drooping. He starts to hold out a hand to shake Laken's, but thinks better of it halfway through and retracts. Maybe if he wasn't overly friendly, or tried to be standoffish or aggressive, he could at least put it off for a while, maybe until Liz got home if Laken didn't pay attention to the time. But then again, maybe Laken was one of those men who liked it better when you tried to push them away. He couldn't know.
Or maybe he's just a normal fucking person. Not everyone is a sadist like Nick.
But he has the opportunity.
That doesn't mean he's going to take it.
He has no reason not to, though. Well…Laken has an interesting hair color. That's nice, at least.
"That's cool." Laken says easily, retracting their hand. "No pressure, man."
"This is Valen." Liz introduces him, since Valen can't. "He's really scared right now, so try not to be too much." She grabs a thick clothing catalog off the coffee table and hands it to them. "Have him pick out what he likes from here, but don't let him write."
"You got it, boss. Blood stuff in the kitchen?" Laken asks.
"Yeah." She looks back at Valen apologetically. "Sorry. Laken's nice, okay? They're not gonna hurt you either. I'll be back in a few hours."
Apparently they're clothes shopping. Exactly how long does Liz plan to keep him here? She's made no mention of removing the muzzle. Does she plan to just have him live here forever, indefinitely muted? The fact that he is apparently going to receive clothes almost makes him feel good, but he just feels nervous instead. He can't make sense of the implications. Did they intend to just have a pet vampire in the upstairs bedroom? Chills go up his spine. Were they going to do other kinds of experiments on him? Surely not, right? She said she wouldn't torture him…
She'd said she wouldn't. Why would he believe her? Why would he believe any of it?
Still, when Liz leaves, he shuffles forward and reaches a hand out, as though to try and grab her to stop her from leaving.
Laken's nice. They're not gonna hurt you either. There's the they again. Laken must be nonbinary. He'd heard of such a thing in passing, mostly in the context of people around him crucifying it as ridiculous and juvenile. He'd secretly found it intriguing, but it doesn't put him at ease. A nonbinary man can still hurt him.
Liz leaves, and Laken claps their hands together, discarding the catalog back to the table for now. "How about breakfast first?"
And then they're alone. Valen's resolve comes back. I'm not stupid. I know you're probably lying. Don't treat me like I'm stupid. He wants to be fed, very much so, but he doesn't trust Laken, and he doesn't want to let Laken see how desperate and scared he is. He remains silent.
Laken shrugs. "Kay, we'll just go with that, then. You think you'll be able to be chill while I get my blood in a cup, or you need some help? Liz told me on the phone to tie you up 'cause you're still getting your juice back, but if you wanna give it a try without, hey, it's cool. Oh, uh, nod for rope, shake your head for nope."
Absolutely not. Valen feels like he would probably die if Laken tied him up. He's not as desperately hungry as he was yesterday, so maybe he'll be able to not lunge? But it was only one feeding…
No, he can't be tied up, absolutely not. He shakes his head frantically. He would rather suffer whatever consequences come from accidentally lunging than be tied up.
“Okay, cool. Let's get this ball rolling, then." Laken smiles at him, then goes to the kitchen and slices their arm to bleed into the cup.
Valen is able to resist a little bit this time, but after a few seconds the smell is too much. I need it RIGHT NOW I NEED IT GIVE IT.
He tries to stop and pull himself back, though, so he just sort of ends up bumping into Laken from behind.
"Oh, hey. It's gonna take a couple minutes, I think." Laken firmly holds Valen away at arm's length with their free arm. "Good to know I'm delicious, though."
Valen blinks at them. Well… That could have gone a lot worse. He wrenches himself away from Laken, chuffing air from his mouth and nostrils aggressively, still feeling threatened and vulnerable, trying to seem dangerous and prepared. He shuffles backwards and takes a seat on the couch.
Laken finishes preparing the blood, bandages themself, and sets Valen up with the straw, murmuring about how "You really seem like you need to smoke some pot. It's so sad vampires can't do that." They turn the straw around for him to lick the bottom too, citing "Liz told me this was a good last step."
Valen snatches the cup from Laken and clutches it to himself, glaring at Laken as he sips it. When Laken puts their hand near Valen, even for something obviously to help, he lets out a low warning growl like a dog.
When he's all done, they get the catalog back out, and a pen, handing both to Valen. "You can go through this and pick out whatever."
Valen’s heart pounds. Does Laken not realize that Valen can use persuasion through writing?  He’s being handed a pen.  He hasn’t had an opportunity like this in so long. His brain twists into anxious knots trying to figure out how to handle this.
Laken does not, in fact, realize. They open the book up to the first page for him.
Valen is suddenly conflicted. Should he try to escape now? Would that make things worse? They're being kind to him, but…
What is he thinking? He has to get out of here. It doesn't matter how nice they are, they're still keeping him captive. They can still do whatever they want to him. He's still at their mercy. This is probably all just to lull him into being complacent. His mind races. Oh no, he has to make a decision.
He takes the pen and starts to write a command, but to his horror his disused hands can't scrape together the dexterity to get it right on the first try, and he ends up producing some chicken scratch before fumbling and dropping the pen.
He lets out a whine and cringes, looking at Laken through his eyebrows.
"Hey." Laken snatches the pen up, suddenly serious. "I know it sucks you can't say anything, but you know why we can't let you, even if you seem like a nice enough guy. No writing, bud."
That…. also could have gone a lot worse. Laken is being remarkably patient. But Valen still has a hard time suppressing the instinctual fear welling inside him.
He takes the catalog, still bracing for retaliation. When none comes, he turns his eyes downward and points to a black turtleneck sweater.
Laken notices the increase in fear. "I get it, dude. You're just trying to survive, I'd probably do the same if I was you. Listen, I won't even tell Liz. We're cool." They circle the sweater.
Maybe Laken is okay. Maybe. He wants to believe it.
Valen goes through the catalog and picks out all the most expensive things. He doesn't realize until afterwards what he's done, but living among the nobility allowed him to develop expensive tastes. It was frustrating because if he could get back to his house, he still had a lot of money and jewelry he'd take from the Kithrara estate, which he could offer to buy the clothes he actually wanted--of course, in that case, he wouldn't need to be buying new ones.
These are the ones he wants though, he'd just done an honest assessment of the catalog for the kinds of things he'd typically wear. Lots of black tops with long sleeves, dark, tight pants, a long, heavy jacket with a hood. He'd even found a studded leather belt and knee-high boots. Which, unfortunately, cost almost $200, so he figured that was one of the more outlandish asks. He colors a little with embarrassment at his selection.
"Damn, you and Lizzie really are two peas in a pod. Maybe she'll give you one of her leather jackets. Dunno if she's gonna go for those boots, but since you can't, I'll argue on your behalf." Laken gives him a wink. "She'll totally cave. Oh, and, hey. You're trans too, right? You want binders or something?"
Valen looks up at Laken sharply, hardly able to believe what he’s hearing. He tears up instantly. He'd never in a million years thought he'd be able to get that at all, let alone without having to ask and plead for it. His wet eyes sparkle with newfound appreciation, and he nods. Okay, Laken is all right. He leans into them, grabbing their shirt.
But…. something still doesn't feel right. How are they going to care about details like this, and validating him, yet still deny him the very basic ability to advocate for himself? To communicate with them as an equal? Were they just buying him nice things like one would buy toys for their dog?
He looks up at Laken pleadingly and slowly points to the muzzle, hopeful inquisition on his face.
Laken sighs. "I can't. Look, I'll talk to Liz about it, alright? Like, honestly, I doubt she'll keep you here forever, so that'd definitely come off. She's probably gonna let you go. She's just paranoid, y'know? Her brother was held captive for years by-" They suddenly grin. "Ooh, I just got the best idea. I know someone you can talk to risk-free."
Uh-oh, it sounds like Laken is saying Liz's brother was held captive by a vampire. Talking with a vampire also had no risk because they were unaffected by persuasion. But his hackles raise defensively once again at the mention of a third unknown party, this one being a vampire. He tended to assume the worst of vampires, a trait he shared with humans--the assumptions were usually not that far off. But… This one was friends with humans, so they couldn't be that bad. Right? Unless they weren't actually friends, but another captive? Were they just going to be put together for a play date? But Laken had said Liz probably wouldn't keep him here forever, so…? He looks at Laken anxiously. He knows he can't really do anything about anything, but he trusts Laken, a little bit.
"Oh, this is such a good idea. I'm a genius." Laken enthuses, oblivious to Valen's anxiety.
Liz gets home soon enough. "Hey! Everything go okay while I was gone?"
"Super smooth." Laken agrees. "Didn't even use the rope for the blood stuff."
Liz flicks them on the forehead. "Stop taking risks." She unpacks the contents of her shopping: a blood draw kit, a small padlock, and these:
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"This way we've got more than just yes and no," Liz explains. "They're not all relevant, like, the yes and no cards are redundant and we don't need hungry and thirsty, but at least you can tell me if you're hurt or something this way. I know it's for kids, but I figured it'd help."
"I actually thought of-" Laken starts.
"And if I put this on the muzzle, we can take the cuffs off." Liz grabs the padlock.
Valen is excited by her haul at first--a blood draw kit means feeding him will be easier, and these cute little cards bode well for his ability to communicate more complex things--he eyes the I want to go home card longingly.
But then she pulls out the lock, and Valen's stomach drops out from under him. No, no, no, please. She's said it as though it were a positive thing, to remove the cuffs, but it looks like a step backwards, definitely a step backwards. As it was now, anyone could take the muzzle off. With this, only Liz could take the muzzle off, or whoever she gave the key to. A key, almost a symbol of ownership as well as from the practical standpoint--if someone lost the key, or something happened to Liz, he would just be out of luck. It forced him to be completely dependent on her and at her mercy in a new and scary way. And if this was her solution, how long was she planning to keep feeding him? Because if the current rate of feeding kept up, he'd be able to break any padlock that wasn't silver fairly quickly. Were they going to stop feeding him? But Laken had said she probably wasn't going to keep him here forever, and would let him go. That was too good to be true, of course, but maybe- They kept telling him things that would make him feel better if they were true, but then doing things that were moving in the opposite direction. If they were going to let him go, putting a lock on his most hated restraint was definitely the opposite of moving in that direction. As soon as Liz declares this will allow them to take the cuffs off, Valen crumples, tears slipping down his cheeks, holding his hands out as though she'd threatened to hit him.
"Oh, hey hey hey, it's okay." Liz takes a step back at his defensive gesture, wanting to give him space. "I thought it'd be good, I thought you'd want them off. Um." She slides the cards across the table to him. "Any of these relevant?"
He shuffles through the cards with shaking hands, trying to find one that says I'm a person and you're not treating me like a person and I don't know how to convince you I don't deserve this. There wasn't one, of course, so he picks out the card that says I am sad and puts it on the table.
"He wants the muzzle off." Laken frowns sympathetically.
"I'm sorry, Valen." Liz feels awful for him. She imagines if Jim came home after his ordeal and wasn't even allowed to speak. "I wanna help you, but I've gotta look out for myself too. And it's just too big a risk for us to talk. I really wanna talk to you too, but it's a safety issue."
"He could talk to Kane," Laken says.
"What? No."
"Why not?"
"Because he's horrible and I hate him." Liz glowers.
Valen shuffles through the cards again, his newfound tool. He quickly lays out I need help, I am hurt, I am hungry, I am tired and I want to go home all in a row, hoping that maybe physically seeing his smorgasbord of negative emotions laid out would impress upon them the extent of his distress.
Liz exhales slowly. "I'll draw you some more blood. You'll heal. I'm sorry. We don't have to use the lock if you don't want. I'm trying to help you as much as I can without compromising my own safety."
"Can't we just drop him off at the border when he can run again?" Laken asks. "He wants to go home." They point at the card.
"…He's a Kithrara," Liz says flatly.
"C'mon, look at him. Do you really think he's gonna come back to human territory after this?"
"I don't know. I can't risk human lives on that."
"Then let him talk to Kane so he can say something more than I am sad." Laken argues. "I know you hate the guy, but he's the only vampire we know, and you know he'd be willing to help."
Liz hesitates, then sighs. "Fine. For Valen. But I'm going to complain the entire time."
Laken smiles. "You wouldn't be you if you didn't."
"Fucking abusive piece of shit." Liz mutters under her breath as she goes to the phone and dials.
Valen clutches his cards to himself. He does kind of want the cuffs off, although he finds them far less distressing than the muzzle. I guess there's no option to get both off… He has a hard time choosing, so he just leaves it, fine with things staying as they are if that's what they choose. He can use his hands well enough to do most things he'd want to, although it's a little annoying.
Sigh…..but hearing humans yet again talk about how dangerous he is, and how he can't be set free for human safety makes him feel small and hopeless again. He's never going to be free of that suspicion, that assumed guilt. But…it sounds like they're going to talk to someone who might help, so maybe it's OK to hope a little bit. He tilts his head in preparation for trying to hear whoever is on the other end of the line during the phone call.
“Hey Liz, what's up?”
“I've kind of got…” She glances at Valen briefly, “A situation.”
“Are you okay?” Jim’s voice takes on a sense of urgency.
“Yeah, yeah I'm fine, just… okay, I'll come out with it. Your situation isn't that unique. I've got a vampire here and he's scared and hurt and I can't let him talk, obviously. So I was wondering if we could meet up with Kane tonight and have him interpret.” Liz blurts out all at once.
“…Wow.”
“I know, I know. You were right, okay?”
“Yeah, I mean, first of all, always am.” Jim gloats. “Second, whatever you need. I'll go let him know what's going on. Can it be here? I think going to your place again would make Kane nervous after last time, even if it'll be night this time.”
“Sure, yeah. Thanks. I’ll see you later, love you.” As much as Liz hates having to rely on Kane of all people, she’s glad this is going somewhere
“Love you too.”
Liz hangs up the phone. "Well, I guess this is really happening."
Laken claps excitedly. "Yay!"
I guess we're going somewhere tonight… Valen figures. He's a little disheartened that the implication from that conversation is that this second vampire is also a captive, same as him. How were they imagining this was going to go? Why was it safe for them to talk to this second vampire, but not Valen? Laken seems excited for it, and Liz seems to think this will be better than the current situation, so maybe it'll be okay. It's a nice thought, that things will work out.
"I'll go get you a second helping." Liz heads to the kitchen and begins drawing blood.
"It'll be okay." Laken tells Valen. "It's all gonna work out." They tap all the cards except I am sad and I want to go home. "We can fix all these easy." They tap I want to go home. "I'm sure we can work this out. The last card depends on you, I guess."
Liz comes out with a fresh cup of blood and hands it to him. He's calm this time. Laken's sitting and talking with him has calmed him down a little. He tries to keep remembering earlier, when Laken had cared enough about his feelings to get him a binder. And just having them acknowledge This sucks was helping, too. It wasn't That thing deserves it or It doesn't feel pain the same way we do, don't worry about it or It's worth it for the greater good.
And they're giving him a second helping of blood. That's so very generous. When Liz comes over and hands him the cup, he pokes the straw into the muzzle, cheeks rosy, sipping placidly like a toddler with a juicebox. Maybe this is OK.
When he's finished drinking, he inverts the straw himself and licks it, watching Liz and Laken tentatively. He wants to say thank you. Even though he's only been able to focus so far on what was still distressing him, he has so very much to be grateful for. His situation has improved immensely.
He flips through his cards trying to find one that matches his feelings, then blushes fiercely and puts down I love you.
"Aw!" Laken is delighted. "Love you too!"
Liz feels super fucking guilty now. "Yeah. Just trying to… make this as okay as possible for you. I know you've been through a lot." She gives him a side hug and collects the cup.
"I've gotta head out. Good luck tonight. And Lizzie, binders too." Laken says, gesturing to the catalog.
"Gotcha."
"It was nice to meet you, Valen!" Laken says. "And hey, don't worry about tonight. Liz's brother is a sweetheart, and it'll be good to talk."
Valen holds up the card that says Yes. Something about a cartoon of a thumbs up makes it feel closer to saying "Nice" than giving a real thumbs up. Nice to meet you, Laken. Please don't die. Humans die so easily.
Liz's brother worries him a little bit, even if he's supposedly a sweetheart. He was held captive by vampires, and so surely has no great love for them. And he's a man, which never bodes well. He does, in fact, worry about tonight despite Laken's plea not to.
-
reminder: i included the taglists for both stories in the first crossover bc i thought it would be a one-and-done thing, but it’s looking like we’re gonna be putting out a bunch of stuff. as such, i will be including the taglists on this and the second part tomorrow as well, but if you’d like to continue being tagged in crossover pieces, please comment saying so in order to remain on the taglist! it’s opt-in! and as the next crossover will be 18+, please be 18+ to enter the taglist for that.
taglist:
@annablogsposts​​
@cc1010foxy​​
@darlingwhump​​
@emcscared-whumps​​
@nicolepascaline​​
@oddsconvert​​
@pumpkin-spice-whump​​
@soursagas​​
@thecyrulik​​
@whump-cravings​​
@whump-for-all-and-all-for-whump​​
@whumpycries​​
@annablogsposts
@badluck990
@barebarb
@cc1010foxy
@ceph-the-writing-spook
@cicatrix-energy
@crying-wings
@crystalquartzwhump
@cupcakes-and-pain
@cyberneticfire
@darlingwhump
@deluxewhump
@down-in-the-whumps
@elrysdoesstuff
@emcscared-whumps
@extemporary-whump
@extrabitterbrain​
@iamtheshriekingguineapig​
@icyheart-and-friends​
@inpainandsuffering​
@interdimensional-chaos​
@kira-the-whump-enthusiast​
@lactose-intolerant-egg​
@lilac-and-lemon-whumps​
@littlespacecastle​
@little-whumpee
@lost-in-labradorite-halls​
@magziemakeswhatever​
@melancholy-in-the-morning​
@morning-star-whump​
@myhusbandsasemni​
@mylifeisonthebookshelf​
@neverthelass​
@nicolepascaline​
@nine-tailed-whump​
@no-terms-and-conditions-apply
@not-a-space-alien​
@nyooom​
@octopus-reactivated​
@oddsconvert​
@onlybadendings​
@owencarvourenthusiast
@pigeonwhumps​
@pumpkin-spice-whump​
@quietly-by-myself​
@quirkykayleetam​
@ramadiiiisme​
@redwhump​
@scp-1296​
@secretwhumplair​
@the-whumperfly-effect​
@the-whumpers-grimm​
@thecyrulik​
@thegreatwhodini​
@themarlo​
@thingsthatgo-whump-inthenight​
@t0rture-me​
@vehan-tikkun-olam-and-stuff​
@whuarri​
@whump-blog-reblogs​
@whump-cravings​
@whump-for-all-and-all-for-whump​
@whump-me-all-night-long​
@whump-my-heart-away​
@whump-queen​
@whumperfully​
@whumpthisway​
@whumpilicious​
@whumpshaped​
@whumpwillow​
@whumpworld​
@whumpy-writings​
@whumpycries​
@whumpyzombie​
@whumpzone​
@wits-and-wrongs
@wolfeyedwitch​
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meowsticmarvels · 11 months
Text
hello mcsm community. this is a repost of a long ass twitter thread i made so i apologize in advance if its formatted weird (and sort of disorganized). but heres some of my Thoughts and analysis on radar. i have much more to say than just this of course but HERE WE GO! radar insaneposting tumblr edition. long post incoming (i worked very hard on this)
ANYWAYS!
- he idolizes the new order and puts them on a pedestal above himself a bit. i mean from some dialogue it's clear he doesn't have the highest opinion of himself but he treats the new order smiliarly to how they felt about the old order in thw wither storm arc
- i have mentioned this several times but the "prison radar" thing definitely comes across to me as him trying to overcompensate (and mimic those he sees as "strong" like petra and jack) sort of. like if you contextualise it with how a lot of the characters called him weak an episode prior and it definitely seemed to have an impact on him its like. yeah. especially being thrown into a situation like w/ the sunshine institute and the whole iron breathtaker thing that has Got to fuck you up. idk i jusy see a lot of people take that at face value like "oh look he's being silly" when it comes across to me as more like insecurity ig?
- hes so autism its unreal
but yeah the whole thing kinda fucks him up
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ig the only thing thay kinda bothers me is that arc doesnt feel finished. and also jesse can ENCOURAGW him to act like someone hes not??? OH AND. id like to point out this thing also involves him trying to break his own strict patterns which is p interesting to me. by this i mean the "disregard my bedtime! break whatever rules I feel like! within reason!" he seems to feel that in order to become stronf he has to be like. less caring of the rules w/e but the "within reason" line and the fact that he dislikes things being disorganized still is like. he doesnt Want to act like this. he doesnt seem to like thag but he feels iys the only way he can be strong and adapt to such a lifethreatening situation (to act like someone he clearly isnt)
another point id like to make is his relationship with Stella. it isnt really explored past this one scene in episode 2 of s2 but god there's a lot to unpack here
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"you'll never change" - has stella... always been like this?  even when radar worked under her (which HAS to be at least a year before s2 bc apparently he's been working for jesse for about a year)
 also she calls him a "quitter" which. 1. has a negative connotation meaning that she Does Not Approve of him leaving 2. implies he quit of his own accord. this isn't normal former boss/former employee interaction though something definitely happened. like theyre both Weirdly Hostile and this is never brought up again....... ehat happened.
also "he doesn't even know how to use a sword" this part stuck out to me but Considering this thing i noticed a few months ago about how the mcsm world is very. survival oriented and people who can slay powerful monsters (i.e. old order) are looked at with high respect. so basically she's calling him weak here which is. Huh. also "you don't know anything" girl what happened.... why does radar feel he has to prove himself like that...
"id be careful about counting on him for anything" what did she mean by this. did radar fuck up in some way unintentionally and it pissed stella off or something??? because something clearly happened and im very sad this is never explored further bc this is a fucking interesting plot point.
also. the last image...... this is so fucking interesting regarding radar as a character because it does actually provide context for the whole prison radar thing. like holy shit this says a lot. the first line kinda shows his insecurity already. he's aware people don't believe in him and think he's weak and a coward, but he's going to try anyway. he feels he has to prove himself kinda.. like "you'll see! i can do it watch!" and considering his behavior in this episode it shows. he's overcompensating for that fear and trying to prove that he can be enough to make a difference. especially shown by how he reacts when "Vos" tells him he's not up for the task. he's trying, it isn't enough, so he decides to mimic his heroes and pretend to be someone he isn't (which... unfortunately half the cast doesn't take seriously)
the second line proves my points more. "im not the person she thinks i am anymore" raises a lot of questions on what happened ofc but there's also the "I can be different. Braver. If that's what the situation requires... I'll do it." and guess what! he *does* do that! a combination of pressure from people telling him that he can't do it and he'd just get hurt in the process and is too weak and cowardly to really do much + the stress of the situations he's thrust into seems to sort of catalyze his decision to put on the "prison radar" persona and pretend to mimic his heroes and act strong to not only make a difference and mean something but also to survive The Horrors . but he doesn't want to do this, that isn't who he is as a person, moreso what he feels he has to do. also thinking of pne line where he says something abojt the "incredible misery in the world crushing down on you". like this is a random throwaway line?? clearly the entire situation of s2 is Getting to him but he never really gets to Express that
now ofc like i mentioned this arc is in no way perfect. it's fucking interesting but it feels unresolved and forgotten by episode 5 along with the other characters completely ignoring the fact that that isn't who he is along with jesse even praising that in some dialogue options. like the writing of this kinda confuses me because everything radar says and feels up to that point implies that it's a façade built to be what others want him to be and as a stress response but some later things kinda treat the way he acts as a Good Thing and like ???? like i get it if they wanted to do the "being more courageous" arc sure. fine. but this doesn't seem like it was simply written as that. he does Not usually act like how he does during the "prison radar" thing and its just never addressed. which fucks me up bc this is personally one of my favorite character arcs of mcsm due to how complicated and insane it is + hes one of my favorite characters ever and i relate to his issues a lot but instead thw writings kinda ????? but yeah. its always bothered me really but to be Fair mcsm was hit by a lot of budget cuts that affected the plot like dont even get me started on the scrapped assistant to the warden who sesms to be meant to be the antithesis to radar kind of... and im p sure some episodes had different writers. so yeah this sucks but it isnt gonna piss me off that bad I just wish his arc was handled a bit differently. might potentially write something or w/e about this but anyways if you read this entire thread 1. you're insane 2. we do a little trolling. follow me mcsm truthers
original tweet thread here: https://twitter.com/rival_trevor/status/1659130820999753730?s=20
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el-ly-sha-give-no-f · 2 years
Text
Camera and Blessing
AUTHOR NOTE: hello, FINALLY I HAVE THE URGE AND ENERGY TO POST, I’ve been doing better now, so like I said before I've been working on father!reader imagine, so here's the first one, Wolff reader, Enjoy! let me know if anything wrong, enjoy and NO repost or COPY my work okay?! love you guys and have a great day! <3
WARNING: yelling? arguing? but flufffffffffffffffff
PAIR: Wolff!reader x Lewis Hamilton
PRONOUNCE: she/her
WORDS: idk
Tumblr media
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Hi, Im y/n Viss Wolff, and yes daughter of the famous Toto Wolff, Im working with F1 as a Mercedes Photographer and my dad's Social Manager. Yeah, I’m actually not into the F1 world, I like Photography! I mean look at it! they're so peaceful. At first when I told my dad that I want to become a Photographer, he kinda doesn't like it.
I ask him why, first, it is because I need to travel and explore outside of the country, that means I have to go alone and it's dangerous then i’m gonna be away from my family, second of all, he said I need to become his Legacy, but I said that I’m not into racing, I was pissed off at that time but he still insisted.
After how many months I begged him, only God know, he finally gave up, he let me become a photographer but on two conditions, that I become Mercedes's special photographer and his social manager. I don’t care, at least I reach my dream work
The first year when I’m part of the Mercedes team, it's was the hardest year of my life, a stressful and depressing year. My dad and Susie have been helping me with a bunch of stuff, the other Social Manager helped me too and other people around the paddock give me a lot of motivation. Oh, by I mean people around the paddock including 'Lewis Hamilton'. When I met him for the first time, I was starstruck, I was so excited to meet him earlier that day, I know I said Im am not into F1 but, what did you expect when your dad talk about him almost every day, of course, I have a little crush on him.
But all of that happened 3 years ago. My feeling toward him become growing.
By that means I have been working with dad for 3 years, it's getting better now. They had my back since then and Im very happy that I live around awesome people.
Right now, I’m at Mercedes paddock , preparing my Canon camera that i bought it myself 2 years ago. I know Mercedes already prepared a camera for me but I don’t want to share it with other photographer cause I’m afraid that they’re  gonna delete my works accidently or not. 
But I don’t know what happen with my lense today, I’ve been wiping it for almost 6 minutes. I’m glad that today activities ir I can say “work” is not much. Just take some picture, handle my dad’s  interview and edit some of my pic then send it to Mercedes Social Media Handlers. That’s it. Like usual.
I heard someone footsteps walking toward me, I look up from my camera lense, It’s Lewis walking toward me, he’s wearing Mercedes official T-shirt. I saw him him smiling at me I reply with my smile back. He gives me a tight hug. His hugs is my favourite thing in this world well other than “foods”. We pull away from the hug.
“Hi Darling, how are you?” He greet me
“Hey Lewis, not much, just preparing my camera right now, as you can see on this table, It’s a mess, I don’t know why my lense suddenly became blurry when I want to used it earlier” I hand the lense to him and he take the lense from my hand and take a look with it.
“well I don’t know much about camera, I’m not a camera nerd like yo-” I smack his arm as I give him a death stare, he raise his arm surrender “I’m joking, well lady, this is your sign to buy a new lense” he suggest made me laugh.
“In your dream Lewis Hamilton, I think it’s just because I don’t wipe it properly but I’ve been wiping it for 6 minutes straight, besides, this lense is my favourite lense cause’ my dad bought it for me as my birthday present last year and I use it since then, kinda hard to replace it with other”
“oh you’re very loyal to this one eh?” Loyal not just for the lense but for our love if you want to know.
“yeah, yeah, kinda like that” I reply
-we talk for a while-
“well Lewis, I think you need to go” I said to him
“why? you want me to leave you?” what the fuck are you doing Y/n. “wait no no, not like that, you still not changing into your into your race suit yet and I know my dad not gonna be happy about it, especially 30 minutes before racing” I rumble
“ He He He, his not gonna be mad at me, besides-” he wrap his arm around my neck “I want to meet my bestfriend before the racing start”.
ouch, that hurt. “bestfriend”. Not me hoping for him to call me his lover.
Like I said my feeling for him is growing, I mean three years! who doesn’t... I’m afraid my dad gonna be mad if I date his ‘Top Driver’, my dad has been teasing about this before but I keep denied it maybe he react is a good react. Well, maybe one day Y/n.
“LEWIS! we need you right now” my thought was interrupted by someone voice calling for Lewis. I see him nodding to the staff.
“I guess, this is it, goodluck for today, and don’t worry about your camera lense, I think you just need to wipe it little bit more” he suggest
“well earlier, you said you’re not one of a camera nerdy like me, I’ve been your friend for three years! I don’t know you’re an camera expert Lewis” I joke
“whatever you said nerd” I smack his arm again, he remove his arm around my neck and looking at me, “I’ll see you after race” he said and he kiss me on the cheek, even though it’s an a quick cheek kiss but it is enough to make me blushing. I look him and see him smiling before, he turn back and walk away.
I’m standing still, blushing, God Damn that smile.
I’m so gonna tell this to Susie! I pack my stuff not worrying about my lense anymore. I put all of my stuff in my backpack and run to find Susie.
Turns out, I bumping into dad instead of Susie.
“hey you,little miss! why so rushing?” He ask me
“nothing” I reply and laugh, I’m ready to go and find Susie again, I turn around and start to walking when I feel someone hand pulling my arm and I turn around. It’s not my normal dad, instead it’s my serious dad. I sigh. This old man.
“what happened?” he ask me again.
“what do you mean what happened? nothing happened” I answer.
“I’m your dad and your shit doesn’t work for mr kid so don’t lie, I know you for the whole of my life, and we made a promise before, no secret between us , no secret between father and daughter” He remind me.
“you done?” 
he nod.
“Well” I smile and doze out while I’m thinking about what happened earlier.
I feel soft smack on my head, and I return to the present, this time it’s not only Toto but Susie too.
“ouch, what was that for” I ask, rubbing the spot where my dad smack me.
“I ask you to explain, not dozing out!”
“okay okay, but since when you’re here?” I ask Susie
“since earlier” she wiggle her eyebrow
“kay kay fine Lewis...” I see my father tense up and raise his eyebrow, “he kissed me-” I got cut off
“WHAT?!!” well here, I heard two types of “what” one is the fuss “what” and one is the excited “what”. But both of them caught everyone around us attention
“SHHHHHHHHHH” I put both of my hand on their mouth, they look around and look at me back, both of them remove my hand from their mouth, one harshly and one softly we all can guess who.
“No Y/n!” I look at Susie who already looking at Toto.
“what do you mean no?!” Susie ask his husband
“cmon his my driver”
“and?” I confuse
“if you guys together, yours relationship will distract him!” he state
“dad what? what about the tease before about me and Lewis?, when I close with Lewis, how come it’s not an issues and it’s never distract him before?” 
“that’s different you guys are friend not dating” he’s argue
“what’s the different, he still your driver, not that one day if I date him suddenly he’ll move to Haas team” I argue back
“stop it y/n! you never discuss with me before you do anything that you want to do”
“what’s the connection with this situation?! this is nonsense!”
“y/n listen-” I cut him this time
“no you listen!, I’m not a child anymore dad, if this whole problem relate with my career path to you you are insane, you always remind me before, past is past! What’s up with you changing your mind?”
“y/n when I say no, It’s a no, can you please just listen to me”
“okay you both, stop it, three of us currently at public, it will get media attention! why don’t you guys continue discuss this at home tonight?” Susie try to remind and calm us, almost forgot that Susie here with us too.
“well here the things, we’ve not even together yet but I’m glad this all happen, cause’ at least I already know how you’ll reacted, whatever you said, handle your interview yourself today” with that I walk of from Mercedes Paddock and start to take some of pics.
-[RACE START/RACE END!!!!]-
Lewis did a really great job! P1! word can’t even describe how happy I am for him, despite what happened earlier. I’ll try to ignore it.
I make my way to Lewis, I call his name and he turn around, I see him smiling and coming towards me, his smile always light my mood up,it’s just, beautiful.
he give me a tight hug and I hug him back.
“congratulation on your win Lewis, I’m so proud of you! you deserve this!” I congrats him excitedly
“thank you so much y/n, this is for you and the team, without you guys I- I don’t know what will happen” he confess
we pull away from the hug.
“y/n actually-” someone call him and he turn to look at the Mercedes staff
“Lewis we need you at the podium!” he nod and turn to look at me again.
“I need to go, duty call, see you later love” he kiss my forehead before he walk and go behind the stage.
I smile and walking to the in front of the stage, me and the team cheering when Lewis standing on the podium, and I take a couple pictures of him holding his trophy with my camera, after that I see my dad looking at me, don’t want to argue again, I look at Lewis currently soak with champagne , I smile before walking back to the paddock.
--------------- TIME SKIP!
Me,dad and Susie arrive home, I look at watch on my wrist currently showing solid 10pm. Jack probably already sleep, it’s passed his bedtime, I miss him so much, even though we don’t share the same blood, but I treat him as one. Despite my mother don’t want to take care of me, she’s long gone, gone from mine and dad’s life. I walking to go to my room tiredly.
“y/n” I heard dad calling my name softly, enough to make me tears falling from my eyes, I stop walking, and slowly turn to look at him.
I wipe my tears, before I ask him
“what?” trying to control my tone
“I leave you guys alone, I’m gonna see Jack and Kate(jack babysitter)” she said and walk out from the living room and go to Jack’s bedroom.
My dad standing in front of me and start talking again.
“first, i just want to say sorry, it’s never been my attention to hurt you or your feeling or anything at all, as your dad, I know i’m not the want who will choose your decision, your career or who you will going to date, I am so sorry y/n” 
“when I saw you and Lewis talking at the paddock earlier, I can see he’s the one for you, he’s the one that can make you happy in the future and he’s the one that can take care of you besides me” he continue
“I know my reason to why you can’t date Lewis is nonsense, like you said earlier, I’m just afraid that you will be far away from me,it’s not because it will distract Lewis no its not, I know I have Susie and Jack, but losing you is one of a thing that I’m not ready to face it yet, I realize i was wrong”
It’s makes me tears up more after I heard what came out from my father mouth, I hug him and continue crying on his shoulder, I feel he rub my back softly.
“Dad, it’s okay, you’re not going to lose me, I am your forever daughter, I’ll never gone from your life, I promise you, I will be with you forever, please remember that, and you don’t have to apologise, I also was wrong, I overreacted and I’m sorry too”
“its okay sweetheart, it was nobody fault, remember what I said, past is past” he remind me
“past is past”I mumble quietly.
“Please never leave me to handling my own interview again, it was stressful” he said and i laugh.
------------------
after that happened we never fight after that and Lewis confess his feeling for me and I told him that I feel the same, my dad already warn him, if he ever makes me cry or hurt my feeling just know what will happen to him. Yeah typical dad things.
END!
=======================================
what do you guys think is it okay? let me know, i have one more fics, daniel ricciardo x reader, prepare! hope you guys safe and healthy, and thank you for those who have been waiting for me to post a new one shot I appreciate it and I’m sorry for making you guys waiting, I love you guys.bye
-elly
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quiet-nocturne · 4 months
Note
answer your 30 questions please and thank you!!!
WOO. HERE WE GO, YA'LL:
ao3 wrapped [writers edition]
How many words have you written this year? Published? 22,685. Unpublished? A loooooot ahaha.
How many works did you publish this year? Currently, 3. Hoping to have 4-5 by christmas though. 👀
What work are you most proud of (regardless of kudos/hits)? definitely cause i'm lovesick. That thing was a labor of love. My first fanfic baby in a loooong time.
What work of yours has the most hits? currently cause i'm lovesick (I ain't even ashamed), which is at 735 hits. But it's kind of biased, considering I only came back to fic writing in like october.
What work of yours got more feedback than you expected? nothing in particular - I'm just happy to have any engagement!
Favorite title you used honestly, no favorite as of yet. All the titles I've used come from song lyrics that are super royai coded/important to me, so I like them all. That answer could definitely change in the future though!
If you use song lyrics, which artist’s songs did you pull from the most? most recently, taylor swift (hopeless, breathless, burning slow), but also banks (cause i'm lovesick and you're all that matters to me anyway - she's SO GOOD for angsty love songs). Lyrics are so, so important to me. I have a ~300 song royai playlist (which I'm going to slim down and post here at some point) that I listen to constantly, lol, and a huge notes file on my phone filled with potential song lyric titles. I have a music degree and it's literally so important to my writing process aajsaksjljasjl.
Pairing you wrote the most for this year? Royai. lol. That's not going to change any time soon. The extreme hyperfixation is REAL.
Favorite pairing you wrote for this year? Again royai. They're the best. My babies. 💖
What work was the quickest to write? Surprising, chapter 2 of hopeless, breathless, burning slow. started it last night and i'm already nearly done the first draft. That thing flew out of me, especially considering chapter 1 was much more of a journey lol.
What work took you the longest to write? definitely chapter 1 of hopeless, breathless, burning slow. it wasn't the writing that was the issue - it was the editing. I really dragged my feet on it, and could have had that thing out like 2 weeks ago. 🤦‍♀️
How many WIP’s do you have in your docs for next year? oh god. my wip's currently include: - chapter 2 of hopeless, breathless, burning slow - sequel to cause i'm lovesick (I ain't even ashamed) - a christmas fic - angsty, hurt/comfort, character exploration, ishval restoration multi-chaptered fic (I'm REALLY excited to work on this!!! yay angst) - roy and riza returning to her old father's house post-cannon and STUFF HAPPENS, fluff, hurt/comfort, etc (also really excited for this one! i've been daydreaming about it for MONTHS. Even just thinking about this fic feels like sinking into a warm bath. That's the vibes I want it to give) - ANOTHER post-promised day fic, because I'm a broken record, but this time more humorous/cute. - aaaand yet another post-promised day fic, but one where Riza REALLY ISN'T DOING WELL/almost dies like a million times at the hospital and roy is sad (!!!). - briggs angst/sick fic - does that make sense? no? it will. Yeah. yeahhh. That list is only going to get bigger. 🤷‍♀️ Some of these will also, shockingly, not have smut lol.
What’s your longest work of the year? So far, ch. 1 of hopeless, breathless, burning slow at a whopping 9, 792 words. It really ran away from me.
What’s your shortest work of the year? mmm, you're all that matters to me anyway at 5,954 words. apparently I can't write anything below 5k lol. 🤷‍♀️
What WIP are you taking into next year with you? Oof, I mean probably most of what I had listed above. I aim to have some of it done - but it's already December 7th, so yeah.
What’s your most common “Additional Tags” tag? Smut. lol.
Your favorite character to write this year? Surprisingly, Roy. I almost find him easier to write than Riza. Normally I don't enjoy writing from the male perspective. But Roy Mustang is just 🔥. I was so surprised lol.
The character that gave you the most trouble writing this year? No one, as of yet. But we'll see what I say once I start working more on the multi chaptered fics. 😬
What’s one pairing you want to explore next year? More Royai, maybe with a dash of Roy/Maes. Maybe I'll try a bit of Ed/Winry? Who knows!
Which work of yours have you reread the most? chapter 1 of hopeless, breathless, burning slow. I am so fucking sick of it ahaha helppp.
How many kudos in total did you get this year? Currently at 142! You are all so sweet. 😭
Which work has the most comments? I think cause i'm lovesick at the moment!
Did you do any collaborative works this year? nope! Definitely something I'd consider doing in the future though!
Did you write any gifts this year? maybe! 👀 we shall see
Did you receive any gifts this year? nope!
What’s your most common category? ...Smut. lol. 🤷‍♀️
What do you listen to while writing? ahhhh I love talking about music with my ships! like I said, my ridiculously huge royai playlist. also all of my top songs on spotify were from it, which includes: 1. Say Yes to Heaven - Lana Del Ray (i've got my eye on you / i've got my mind on you) 2. Work Song - Hozier (no grave could hold my body down / i'll crawl home to her) 3. I Wanna Be Yours - Artic Monkeys (secrets i have held in my heart / are harder to hide then i thought / maybe i just wanna be yours) 4. Night We Met - Lord Horan feat. Pheobe Bridges (i had all and then most of you / some and now none of you / take me back to the night we met / i don't know what i'm supposed to do / haunted by the ghost of you) - that ishval restoration fic is definitely going to use a lyric from this song SOMEWHERE Honorable mentions: Die First - Nessa Barrett (someone dies or someone gets hurt / but if one of us dies / i hope i die first) Ya'aburnee - Halsey (i'll never know / if there's danger in confession / or it's memory that presses / like a blade against my throat / another word and i could choke / but what's worst? / tellin' you my feelings / or to die without revealing / that you got inside my head / and set a fire there instead?) Dress - Taylor Swift (there is an indentation in the shape of you / made your mark on me, a golden tattoo / all of this silence and patience / pining and anticipation / my hands are shaking from holding back from you) 10000/10, would play at royai's wedding.
Favorite work you wrote this year? cause i'm lovesick. Again, it was my baby. I loved writing it so much.
Favorite line/passage you wrote this year? mmmm, probably: "She'd planned to stay angry at Mustang for longer, but then he'd surprised her by sauntering into her apartment basically the second his train had arrived, eyes blazing with desire as he collected her in his warm embrace, murmuring you have no idea how much I've been craving to taste you against the soft skin of her throat." (I tried to find one that was mostly sfw lol).
Biggest surprise while writing this year? Just being able to write, in general! It's been so much fun. 💖
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elvenking42 · 6 months
Note
you should answer ALL of those asks in the post
Oh my god ok HAHA get ready for a wall of text then
1. who is/are your comfort character(s)?
If you've been following me long enough you start to see trends. I've always liked Luigi so he's probably the most popular character on this blog. Ganondorf is quickly climbing the ranks somehow.
2. lighter or matches?
Lighter for function, matches for fun :D
3. do you leave the window open at night?
I've tried it in some summer months but all it does is leave the air cold and wet when I wake up, I'm not super into it. But the nighttime breeze is lovely
4. which cryptyd being do you believe in?
I wouldn't be surprised if I came across the Nain Rouge. Although I'd be a little nervous considering he's a harbinger of bad luck
5. what color are your eyes?
A sort of greyish-blue
6. why did you do that?
I thought it was funny :3c
7. hair-ties or scrunchies?
Hair-ties by a mile. Sorry to scrunchie fans
8. how many water bottles are in your room right now?
There's like three empty water glasses on my desk right now I really should clear them out
9. which do you prefer, hot coffee or cold coffee?
Hot coffee for sure. Cold coffee blends are fine, but half the time I drink coffee at all is for the warmth
10. would you slaughter the rich?
I could probably use a hand
11. favorite extracurricular activity?
Drawing :3c I've been having a lot of fun doing some video editing in my personal time too hehe.
12. what kind of day is it?
Honestly it's been pretty awful. I couldn't sleep last night so I ended up sleeping in super late and missed the chance to call my doctor's office and schedule an appointment like I was planning. I got a letter in the mail summoning me for jury duty and had a little anxiety attack about it. And then later I tried to take out some cash at the bank and my card got declined. At this point I'm just hunkering down at my desk trying to get myself to relax
13. when was the last time you ate?
I had some chips like an hour ago.
14. do you love the smell of earth after it rains?
Of course! But my favorite part of rain is the air pressure right before a storm
15. are you a parent? (all answers qualify)
Nah, that doesn't interest me
16. can you drive?
No, ironically this was part of the anxiety attack mentioned previously
17. are you farsighted or nearsighted?
Nearsighted
18. what hair products do you use?
I use a really standard shampoo and conditioner. But I use a special wash for my beard specifically
19. imagine we’re at a sleepover, would you paint my nails?
Yeah! I'm not great at it but I'll try my best
20. do you say soda or pop?
Pop, this is Michigan!
21. something you’ve kept since childhood?
I answered this one previously :D
22. what type of person are you?
I'm trying to get better
23. how do you feel about chilly weather?
I like it! I can tell winter is around the corner and I'm very excited to bundle up. Unfortunately it's also getting dry and my skin is terrible
24. if we were together on a rooftop, what would we be doing?
I'm not too sure how we got up there, I hope you brought a blanket, it's cold out!
25. perfume/body spray or lotion?
Lotion! But perfume every once in awhile
26. a scenario that you’ve replayed multiple times?
Some point in the future when I'm living on my own and I've got a stable job and a comfortable home and I can invite my friends over for parties where we all bring a dish and spend the evening playing party games and talking about the nice things in our lives and when everyone leaves for the night I can send them all home with some snacks and a hug. Manifesting it.
27. about how many hours of sleep did you get?
I got 7 hours last night, unfortunately that was between 10am and 5pm so it was godawful
28. do you wear a mask?
Yea! I still wear a mask out in public. I only remove it if I'm eating or in private company with people. It's a little frighting that I'm always in the minority though
29.how do you like your shower water?
Scalding
30. is there dishes in your room?
See number 8
31. what type of music keeps you grounded?
I always return back to oldies when I don't know where else to go. I like familiar lyrics and retro melodies
32. do you have a favorite towel?
Not really
33. the last adventure you’ve been on?
I went to a Dia de los Muertos event last night being hosted by a restaurant I frequent. It was actually super fun, they had love music and vendors selling things. I actually ran into an old coworker while I was there and got to catch up with him. I kept ordering spiked hot coffee because it was outdoors and the drinks were yummy but unfortunately 3 coffees worth of caffeine made it hard to fall asleep
34. is there a song you know every word to by heart?
This one
35. what’s your timezone?
EST
36. how many times have you changed your url?
Actually never
37. someone in your life, other than a relative, you’ve known for 10+ years?
Some of my buddies from highschool. I love them dearly 💕
38. a soap bar that smells good?
Go for a Lavender/mint blend
39. do you use lip balm?
Not as much as I should
40. did you have any snacks today?
Had some goldfish
41. how do you take your coffee?
With creamer
42. an app you frequently use besides this godforsaken site?
Twitter unfortunately.
43.what’s your take on spicy foods?
I like it! Im a little sensitive tho so I take it on the mild side
44. you get a free pass to kill anyone, who is it?
Elon musk is a dead man
45 . can you remember what happened yesterday?
See 33
46. favorite holiday film?
Scrooged is so rewatchable for me
47. what was the last message you sent?
"I know what you are..."
48. when did you first try an alcohol beverage?
I think my mom let me sip her wine when I was like 8. I didn't like it very much so I didn't try drinking until I was 20
49. can you skip rocks?
Sometimes!
50. can i tag you in random stuff?
Sure!
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ladytanithia · 9 months
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tagged by @dirty-bosmer to share five random things I enjoy. How very simple and sweet :) Thank you for thinking of me!
Edit: AFTER I posted this, @skyrim-forever and @thequeenofthewinter tagged me, so I'm tagging them back so they can see my pathetic answers. Compared to everyone else's lists, I have no life. 😂
Writing - I put it off for far too long to raise 3 kids and it's like a drug to be writing again.
2. Drawing - same as above. Haven't actively drawn since junior high or high school, until the last couple of years. ProCreate has been an absolute game changer for me - if I shape the face wrong, I can stretch, distort, liquify, etc., and not make a huge mess erasing. I can draw straight lines and circles without a ruler or compass. The colors are exactly what they look like (unlike colored pencils!).
3. My OC, Miranja, and having other people enjoy her, too. (Oh, gods, that just reminded me of something one of the guys in the airframes shop used to say frequently: "Hey - I love my wife. And you can, too, for twenty dollars!") Mostly because she's in part a reflection of many of the things I've been and I am, but also because she has qualities I wish I had myself.
4. Playing Skyrim and taking my beloved Talvas everywhere with me, even though he's supposed to be a steward. Along with that, I'm enjoying having friends online to geek about Skyrim WITH. The guy who got me into Skyrim died a couple of months ago, and my son is the only person I physically see with whom I can share Skyrim shit. It was lonely there for a while, until Tumblr (TESblr).
5. Having a best friend/lover/partner in life and crime. Hey, it doesn't say I have to share something that's actually in my life RIGHT NOW. I've had that before, and it was the best thing in the world, and it's been 10 years since my spouse died, but I still hope that a miracle will happen and I'll have it again. (But they'll have to love Skyrim or no deal - I wear an Amulet of Mara 24/7, and if someone recognizes it, it's on.)
~~~spreading the joy to~~~
most of my friends were already tagged by dirty-bosmer, so that leaves @gwilin-stay-winnin and @sunny-d-anomaly
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rontra · 1 year
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this ask/reply is long so im just putting it together as a textpost help me shark if you're out there
Anonymous asked: hi ok im super super sorry if this is bothering you but ive been meaning to ask it for like 6 months or something . i was introduced to your work via skin game and my brain latched to it ever since i read it. me and some other friends really enjoyed the fic even if it was a short read and i was wondering if youre comfortable sharing chapter 2 either publicly or privately? again im ultra mega sorry if this comes off as creepy or weird or something ive been stressing over it for liek 3 days since i didnt want to bother you :(
either way, love your work so much. your fanart introduced me to both arknights and rwby (though a friend kind of pushed me to actually start watching it lol) and theyre both really great series :) your work is a huge inspiration for me and my friend group and your writing is just insane /pos
(3rd paragraph omitted bc i cant priv reply and im excluding your offsite info even if its under a readme HFDBHJF)
hi shark!! ofc i remember you we are like soldiers side by side in the trenches of takano posting 🫡
so first of all thank you so much for following and enjoying my work 🥰 i'm always happy to help drag people into the arknights/rwby zone HEHEHE i'm glad you enjoy what i make!!! it means a lot to me 😊 thank you!!!
now. THE THING ABOUT skin game ch2. is that it's pretty rough. i had a look at it the last time something prompted me to think about the fic and it's not really presentable (i don't know if i even finished editing it back in ….. 6 years ago… oh god). it also doesn't have all of its art (which might be a blessing in disguise given the art it does have is …. 6 years old… oh god)
getting it to a state i consider readable would take a good chunk of work, which is why i put it off again after looking at it. it's almost 12 thousand words of … uhhh… shall we say… unnnnpolished material. i think i couldn't even share it privately because i would be embarrassed to show someone something so unfinished and janky. not to mention not having all of its art finished. so i got kind of stuck last time and just put it off again bc the amount of work it very obviously needed was like. "Christ OK Not Now" yknow…
it does bolster the spirit when i remember you and your friends. it means a lot to me that you care about it even after so long!!! i just have NO idea when i'm going to get around to editing something of that magnitude @_@ i was really a dummy about chapter lengths back then… HFDBHJGJMK
it's really kind of a shame too becahse chapter 1 and 2 together are sort of the introductory portion for our 2 primary characters. so it feels like only half of the intro is done right now. since ch1 detailed how kyrie ended up at that plaza meeting takano, ch2 would detail how takano ended up there, meeting kyrie. and then we would proceed into the future from there. as a renowned Takano Guy, obviously i was very interested in this, but for various reasons i never finished polishing it and drawing the art…
ch2 also features ikuko so you KNOW its dear to me
overall being like 5-6 yrs old theres a disconnect where i don't feel like ch2 right now is achieving what it should, and i see a lot of concrete problems with concrete solutions, but it's an editing of such Magnitude that it keeps being pushed back in favor of other stuff. oh, ephemeral soul…
some of the art i did get done for it is pretty cute though, like these baby miyos;
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so that's pretty good, but i didnt FINISH drawing the art, ARGHH
it is really hard to say. bc when i KNOW there's people out there who remember it and care about it, that does motivate me to return to it. but it has a lot of stuff that needs doing, and is a very old project, so it's unclear to me right now when it would receive the attention it desperately needs before it can be shown to other people... i super can't in clear conscience accept anything like payment/etc for that kind of vague half-promise either, although i appreciate the thought xD
i'm sorry it's such an inconclusive answer, but i am sort of an inconclusive guy when it comes to projects... i jump around a lot as i'm sure you've observed in your time following me 😭 it's important to me to have that freedom, but i do care about SG too, so we just sort of have to see if i can surmount the magnitude of the work i accidentally set up for myself half a decade ago (*turning into stone*)
but it makes me smile when i remember you're out there thinking about this weird little AU. so, thanks. 😌 a soul still burns...
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and then after all that CH3 was going to have more of best girl 🥺.....
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WARGH <- BEARER OF THE CURSE
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starspray · 1 year
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3, 30, and 45 for the writer ask, please!
3. What are some tropes or details that you think are very characteristic of your fics?
I don't know about tropes because I don't typically think of my stories that way when I write them. But Tolkien feels very twilight to me, even when things take place in broad daylight, so I usually end up writing at least one scene at sunset, or underneath the stars. Gil-Estel shows up a lot--and with that, I very rarely write anything without the theme of estel cropping up.
Also laughter? I feel like I write a lot of characters laughing. I'm very fond of the tra la la lally Elves of The Hobbit, and Elves laughing and singing even in the midst of dark times is very important to me. And I write hobbits a fair amount and that's also always fairly light-hearted.
30. Have you ever written something that was out of your comfort zone? If so, what was it, and how did it affect your approach to writing fic thereafter?
Oh yes. My fic God, I Pity the Violins is a crossover with The Old Guard, and I've never written a fic so soon after watching/reading the source material. Also this last summer's TRSB fic What Your Life Is takes place in a time and place in Middle-earth that I'd never written before and which has next to nothing written about it in canon, even by Tolkien's next to nothing standards--and is extremely OC-heavy (that's not really out of my comfort zone, exactly, I love a good OC, but I don't usually have almost 20 running around the same fic). I had a lot of fun writing both, though, and after the initial terror of posting them I'm quite proud of both!
I don't know that either have particularly affected my approach to fic-writing, except to give myself a pretty decent confidence boost. Violins is the longest fic I've written to date, as well, and it's nice to know that I'm able to write something over 50k and not have it be hot garbage (I've done 50k for NaNoWriMo multiple times--but a draft written in a month at high speed is always hot garbage, and the one NaNo that was a fanfic that I then edited and posted ended up being much shorter.)
45. What’s something you’ve improved on since you started writing fic?
Everything! No seriously, I started writing when I was 13, which is...almost 2 decades ago...what is time oh my god. Anyway, it would be very weird if there wasn't an aspect of writing that I'd improved on since then. But aside from the general mechanics of it...I'll say worldbuilding. I started writing original fiction at the same time I started writing fanfiction--in fact I dropped fanfic pretty quickly at first once I realized I could just, y'know, make things up wholesale without the constraints of existing stories--and especially since joining the Tolkien fandom I've learned a lot, particularly from Tolkien but also from reading other authors and just by writing (and rewriting) my own stuff and seeing what works and what doesn't.
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deadchovsky · 2 months
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Ok nvm more yapping under the cut. Tumblr is my diary and baby, I'm writing in pink glitter gel. Ignore this <3
I'm formatting this like greentext bc its funny
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Big Font.
😨
Ddo you like Wilbur soot. Cuz I do
youtube
Anyways:
>be me on NYE
>one of my friends asked me to take a picture out of this end of year video thing I post on my 15 subs youtube channel every year at the end of the year.
> he says because his phone screen is visible and hes worried about what's on it. Says it might be some rp server he was on at the time the picture was taken and thinks it could he embarrassing. (This is important remember this.)
>I zoom in on the picture, it literally looks like a black screen.
> he says hes still worried about someone seeing it
>okay whatever. I try my best to remove this picture that last for like 2 seconds out of a 15 minute long video. (Sidebar, this picture was already in a different video months ago and he was fine w it then and literally has never brought up removing it from that video once.)
> I save changes to the video
> "okay I think I got it, but there might be like .5 seconds of it still, bc YouTube's editing thing sucks"
> he says its fine, because it's a 15 minute long video and the longest that clip is in there for is like. A singular second.
> 2 months later
> be me
> this mf hasnt talked to me, or basically any of my friends since new years.
> guy literally dropped out of the play despite wanting to be in it since September
>guy is literally in all 4 of my classes and hasnt attended a single one since the second day of the semester.
>I'm walking around the school bc the gender neutral bathrooms are closed, so I'm going to the least scary girls bathrooms near the front of the school.
> guy and one of my friends show up and stop me in the hallway.
> friend: "hey guy needs to talk to you."
> me: "bro I have to piss rn can it wait"
> apparently not.
> Guy: "I know you don't understand why I feel this way" (most condescending tone possible)
> turns out changes didnt save in YouTube video and the picture is still in the video for literally 0.003% of the entire runtime.
> tells me to remove it because he thinks that he was "texting his mom about his attempt at the time"
> picture was taken a month before the attempt. also he told me it was the rp server the first time I tried to remove it.
> ok whatever. I say I'll remove the picture.
> interaction is very awkward(mind you we're standing in the middle of a high school hallway while hes telling me all this) I leave and go piss
> I go back to class after pissing
>friend (who was with guy) says that was the first time guys talked to her in a few weeks.
>I show her the picture on my phone, bc I feel like I'm going crazy. The phone literally only looks turned on bc you can see a slightly outline of a white keyboard. Not to mention the photo is BLURRY.
>friend confirms that you can't see fucking shit on the phone in the picture.
>thank god because I thought I was somehow wrong for thinking you cant see shit
Also, bro saw that video that the picture was in once, freaked out bc he thought you could see his rp server in it, then tried to tell me TWO MONTHS LATER (and almost 10 months AFTER the picture was taken and posted in a different video THAT HE SAW) that he was talking to his mom about a suicide attempt in there. I didnt even remember about that bro how tf did he manage to keep that in his brain for two fucking months. Get different meds you fucking dweeb like oh my god. Clearly whatever you're on now isnt working.
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