gone fishin’
[ ao3 / ff.net ]
Two exorcists wade into a river.
Alternatively: Natori and Matoba’s riparian adventure with an 80% chance of death or at the very least, grievous injury.
There is a hold-up at the pet shop. The sounds of a disagreement filter back through the shelves and Natori listens with the vaguest sense of disquiet. A separate queue has been formed so he moves along with it.
Matoba Seiji is arguing about aquarium dimensions at the counter.
"So, will you take this one, sir?" He watches the cashier age ten years in real-time.
Natori himself is next in line and there is nowhere to retreat.
"Yes, thank you." Matoba side eyes him when he finally steps up to the counter and he is all but pinned to the floor.
Natori Shuuichi can't help the sneaking suspicion that his day off won't be a day off anymore.
—
Once they're outside, Matoba generously offers the use of the trolley he's borrowed for Natori's bag of birdseed.
Natori relents.
The look Matoba fixes him with is innocently curious—the one he makes when it comes to potentially finding out something about his contemporaries.
So rather, it's carefully cunning.
"It's for birds," he blurts out inelegantly.
Matoba's expression morphs into bemusement and mild alarm. "Well, I should hope so, Shuuichi-san."
And so, as it always goes with Matoba, he feels the need to explain himself further.
It had started one morning with his half-finished breakfast. His last piece of toast had been spirited away before he could blink. The sparrow had glared at him in such a way that Natori had felt abashed.
Tossing a preemptive handful of crumbs before breakfast had turned into an investment of a bird feeder and birdseed. His elderly neighbor who shared his balcony space had turned up at his front door one morning.
"I find that they like these!" Natori had hurried to relieve her of the bag of birdseed that was more than half her height.
"So they'll grow big and strong," Tachibana-san had beamed.
While he ensured the safety of his future toast, the little bit of wildlife really was a respite in the city. He had found Hiiragi admiring them through the window on more than one occasion.
In fact, it had been Hiiragi who had sent him out this morning.
"They don't like this kind." They had run out of the usual brand. She was quietly devastated and Natori could not abide that, so he'd set off on his mission.
Of course, his luck had landed him in the same pet shop as Matoba Seiji.
"How sweet, Shuuichi-san.” Matoba is fighting a smile.
"I am." Natori lifts his chin and is pleased.
Matoba Seiji cuts a severe figure against the haze of the summer day. All harsh lines with his tailored suit and perfect posture. Natori would reckon that he was previously with a client. Or on the way to one? Either way, Matoba doesn't seem to be about to volunteer any information. Least of all about the fish tank.
So when he stops abruptly, Natori crashes into him and then knocks his shin sharply against the trolley.
"Shuuichi-san." He turns to him with a one-eyed stare.
"What." He rubs sullenly at his leg.
"I need to catch a fish."
"…What."
”Would you help me?"
It is with this plea and the look on Matoba's face—one that would sooner be seen on a basset hound—that Natori finally, officially, forfeits the rest of his day off.
—
There is a fish in the river.
This particular fish has been terrorizing the waterfowl and fauna. Growing at an alarming rate, it is poised to singlehandedly (fin-edly?) wreak havoc on the local ecosystem.
“Big. This big.” Matoba had held his hands apart, adjusting after a moment. “Well, thereabouts.”
Natori raised an eyebrow. “Very descriptive.”
”My informants were, yes.” Matoba said solemnly.
You’re being oddly cryptic, Seiji, Natori thinks.
“That’s about all they knew.”
Oh. Guess he said that aloud then.
And time is of the essence, apparently.
It wouldn’t be long before larger things were on the menu. The local poodle. The local poodle’s owner. That kind of thing. Natori makes a face.
”It’s not unimaginable,” Matoba says.
”I never said it was. Just improbable.”
”It’s not like you to lack imagination, Shuuichi-san.” A sliver of a smile.
“That is not something I’d like to imagine.”
“Me neither.”
—
Spells are out of the question for now.
“You don’t need to tell me that.”
”As you’d like.”
Water is difficult. The smallest ripple can and will push spiritual energy off course, disabling and dissolving a spell entirely. Forget about a river.
Conversely, if he were to believe the rumors he’s heard, if you have patience in spades, it is possible to work the ebbs and flows to your favor. Just a bit. Because ultimately, Nature has no qualms for your efforts.
Natori himself has a day job and finds solid ground preferable.
—
Currently, they are seated upon the bank, Matoba reinforcing his fish tank with pieces of spell paper.
”If only that kitty cat was here.” Natori smiles at the frown he can hear in Matoba’s voice.
“Natsume’s? He’s very conditional. I doubt you could afford his starting fee. Plus…” Natori lies back in the grass, catching sight of Matoba’s consternation in full. “For you, he’d probably refuse on principle.”
With a huff, Matoba returns to his seals.
After a while, Natori fidgets with the need to do something.
When he impulsively begins rolling up his pant legs, Matoba blinks up at him in surprise.
“Do you have any other ideas?”
”Well…”
“Exactly.”
Natori doesn’t miss how Matoba glances down at his left leg.
“Seiji.” The other man startles. “If this is it, promise me that you’ll finish me off.”
With that, he steps carefully down the bank.
And it’s true. Monster fish claims exorcist’s cursed left leg. Natori shudders. Even he is under no illusion that he would be able to live that down.
.
Is it really summer? Natori hadn’t been able to hold back a yelp when he’d stepped into the river.
“Something the matter?” Matoba calls from behind him.
“Oh, s’just fine.” Natori just barely keeps the chattering tremble from his voice. “Just lovely.”
You brought this upon yourself. A voice in the back of his mind chides. It almost sounds like Hiiragi.
I wouldn’t wish this upon my worst enemy!
”Is it cold?” Natori turns with a beatific smile. Sparkles too, surely Matoba can’t be immune.
“Not at all. Come on in.” Matoba watches him warily, starting to back away.
Oh no.
It is on.
“You get in here!”
—
It is only once they have both been thoroughly soaked and have started to dry out on the bank that Natori starts thinking about poetry.
Because there is something of the sort at work here. An expanse of unfamiliar ground that they find themselves navigating together again.
Contrary to what one might think, Natori Shuuichi is not against poetic justice. The fluffy kind that his acting allows him to indulge in is the best fun. And the fact that it helps pay the bills doesn’t hurt either.
Then there are the ancient grudges and blood oaths he encounters in exorcist work that are all too real. But that’s kind of exciting in its own right.
And whatever he and Seiji have going on. Natori’s not blind. More… willfully ignorant. Ever trying for blissfully obtuse.
For today, Natori is not going to be the one to point it out. Perhaps some things are better left unsaid.
The clouds are that wispy kind, all gossamer and lace, combed out against the blue of the sky above.
It is all too easy to let his eyes drift closed. His dreams are full of poetry.
—
“Surely this is not how you operate nowadays, Shuuichi-san.” Shuuichi wakes up to find Seiji peering down at him.
“Only on my days off.”
“Oh. I apologize for that.”
“S’not a big deal.” Shuuichi stretches, feeling surprisingly refreshed. “Have you seen our fishy friend?”
Seiji shakes his head. “That’s why I woke you up.”
“What?”
“We’re going to buy bait.”
.
Bait is an assortment of sandwiches from a nearby convenience store. Two of them are for Shuuichi and Seiji. One is for the fish.
The sandwich does the trick.
—
And it has teeth.
Several rows, like a goddamn shark. Shuuichi knows this because he has the fishy fiend by the tail, an arm’s length away. What good that does him is anybody’s guess, the creature is a good deal longer. That leaves him with one arm to keep its jaws as far away from his person as he can.
A burst of panic had made quick work of the restraints they’d managed to cast.
“You want this thing alive?” Shuuichi staggers back, thrown by the yokai’s frantic thrashing. The spell circle they’d set up as a last resort is a tempting thing.
“If you can manage to keep it like that,” Seiji calls over his shoulder, with a lilt of challenge. He’s making last minute adjustments to the tank.
Shuuichi proceeds to exhaust every curse he knows and then some as he attempts to keep the fishy devil from taking a chunk out of his hand.
—
When all is said and done, it is an impressive specimen of a fish.
Fans of fins sparkle with iridescence and its eyes glow cat-like.
Shuuichi almost feels bad, seeing it in its glass prison. Granted, he feels like that whenever he goes to a zoo or an aquarium. Of course, those animals have never tried to eat two of his fingers.
Yet the principle stands. So he is almost tempted to tip the tank and tell it to swim away as fast as it can.
Go on. Only if you apologize first. They make eye contact. A piece of Shuuichi’s shirt sleeve is still stuck in the fish’s jaws. It slurps the rest of it down before turning its tail to him. Ungrateful little brat.
—
“Hey, Mister! You caught it!” Shuuichi looks up to find two boys scrambling down the bank towards them. Dragging his heel through the last remnants of the spell circle, he watches them approach Seiji.
Seiji greets them with a pleasant smile. “Hello, again.”
The boys enthuse over the brooding behemoth at a safe distance.
“Oh yes, it put up quite a fight, but we managed.” Shuuichi rolls his eyes at the ‘we’.
They have placed bets on all manners of its features and now one boy owes the other a week’s worth of manjuu.
For some reason, Shuuichi feels his throat closing up.
“Dinner?” Seiji is saying. “No, actually this one’s going to be my pet.” He pats the tank. Absurdly, the fish seems to be enjoying the attention. It executes one lazy barrel roll.
The boys cheer.
Seiji turns to Shuuichi then, raising his eyebrows. “My informants,” he intones formally. The kids are amused.
Big. This big. Potential poodle devourer. It all makes sense. Shuuichi simpers internally.
He’ll spare Seiji today. Time for some Old Man and the Sea-esque regaling of their catch.
—
“Really? A pet?” Shuuichi asks. They’re waiting for Seiji’s car to come pick him and his new charge up.
“Maybe pet is a little generous. Rather… garbage disposal? And if it doesn’t work out…” Seiji gives a noncommittal shrug. Shuuichi shudders. Right. The Matoba are nothing if not resourceful.
“Don’t worry, Shuuichi-san, your efforts won’t go to waste.”
“The least I could ask for, I suppose,” Shuuichi sighs. He glances at the fish.
“It was nice.” Seiji watches him. “That you did that.”
“You know me, always a wellspring of goodwill.” His tone is light, a touch sardonic. The sentiment could float away to nothing. Shuuichi won’t let it.
“Yeah, you can be. Sometimes.”
Seiji doesn’t say anything. Shuuichi wonders what he’s thinking. But he won’t press that for now. Instead, he pursues the other thought nagging him.
“Do you think that they…” Shuuichi doesn’t know how to finish. At least Seiji gets the gist of it.
“Perhaps. Or perhaps it’s grown powerful enough to be seen.”
Shuuichi considers that. “Okay.”
“Okay?”
“Yeah… okay.”
There’s nothing more to say, so they don’t.
—
Seiji is surprised when Shuuichi takes him up his offer to drive him home.
The birdseed is settled next to the tank in the back and the fish snaps at the colorful bird pictured on the front of the bag, knocking its nose soundly against the glass.
The sound Shuuichi makes can only be described as a guffaw. Seiji quickly shoos him into the car, not wanting to further cement this vendetta between them.
Shuuichi promptly falls asleep.
And then maybe it’s not the best time, but when has Seiji ever really been good at that?
”Thanks for helping, Shuuichi-san.” His head falls onto Seiji’s shoulder and Seiji doesn’t have to hide his smile.
“I’m glad you were here.”
Seiji wonders what Shuuichi will say when he wakes up to find their hands laced together.
He doesn’t mind waiting to find out.
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(first- The ED's (obviously) )
ed ("edly Anouilh" 15 5'11)
Edd ("Eddward Martinez" 14 5'6)
Eddy ("Edwin Giordano" 14 5'4)
(the ed's are "tied" together by a set of matching lace (thanks to Double D's sewing skills he learned thanks to his mother- he adores the two to death, cant stand to be without them. although he does tend to get frustrated with eddys antics)
Jimmy (Jimmy Dubois 8 4'3)
Sarah ("sarah Anouilh" 10 5'0)
Jonny (Jonny "2x4" Fontenot" 12 5'3)
(Jimmy is pretty close to sarah, but her abrasive personality can be a little overwhelming for him)
(Sarah doesnt have a close relationship with ed, but they do have a mutual understanding ((thanks to constance))
(jonny's family is from deep south Louisiana, his grandmother being southern cajun. the necklace he wears is garnished with alligator teeth, made by his father.)
Kevin (kevin smithson 13 5'4)
Nazz (Nazz Clark 13 5'6)
Rolf (rolf dumitru 15, 5'11)
(nazz has a bit of a "pop-ish" kinda look, she loves to stylize her hair.)
may (May kanker 13 5'0)
marie (Marie kanker, 14 5'4)
Lee (lee kanker, 14, 5'5)
(may is alot sweeter than her sisters, wanting to take the time to actually make friends, but her sisters make it fell impossible.)
(though they were considered "enemies" the kankers have grown platonically closer with the edds after "discovering" why they didnt "like" them)
(maries coat is from her father (butch), it was one of the last gifts he gave her before leaving. shes had it tailored thanks to double D. shes decorated it with her initials. shes gained a bit of a "punk" style, letting her hair grow out. shes overall alot nicer since her brothers returned)
(lee has gone on a bit of a "self-rediscovery" path, after the "incident" and since her brothers returned, has gotten alot closer to him as well.)
(thats it folks, all my eene redesigns. now im gonna start working on their parents)
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