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whump-tr0pes · 3 years

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HB4-41/Whumptober day 26

This is a series. Start here, continued from here.

This is a sequel to Honor Bound, Honor Bound 2, Honor Bound 3, and Vera.

AO3

Masterlist

Content warning: migraine aftermath, emesis mention, attempted murder, victim-blaming, talk of death, past noncon of a minor (not discussed in any detail), death threats, suicidal actions (not for the reason you think), blood mention

@eatyourdamnpears, darlin... enjoy.

The first thing Gavin was aware of was light filtering into the room through the curtains. The second was the soft touch of Isaac’s fingers carding through his hair. Gavin sighed and rolled towards his warmth before he remembered moving caused him agony – and relief struck him when his head only throbbed a little bit.

He blinked his eyes open. Isaac was sitting on the bed, fully clothed, gently smoothing Gavin’s hair.

“Ugh,” Gavin mumbled.

“Morning,” Isaac murmured, and bent to gently kiss Gavin’s forehead. “Feeling better?”

Gavin experimentally lifted his head. The room still seemed to push against Gavin, his brain still pressing against the insides of his skull, but his stomach was settled, and his sight was clear. His mouth tasted foul. He was desperately thirsty.

“Um, yeah,” he croaked. “Fuck.”

“Yeah.” Isaac’s mouth twisted in a sad smile. “I just wanted to check on you before I head out.”

Gavin shifted in the bed and slowly, painfully pushed himself upright. “Why? Where you going?” He rubbed sleep out of his eyes. “What time is it?”

“It’s about eight,” Isaac murmured. “AM. You slept through the night. Finn said you needed it.”

“Ugh. I’m… I’m sorry about yesterday.” Gavin flushed. Isaac had stayed by his side for hours, changing the trashcan after Gavin vomited up the tea and water he’d slowly been sipping. Isaac had kept the compresses cool and gently massaged the back of Gavin’s neck, when Gavin was aware enough to respond. And…

And Isaac wanted to stay with him for a lifetime.

Gavin’s throat bobbed as he swallowed. He never thought… never imagined… that Isaac might want him that way, too.

“Hey, it’s…” Isaac’s hand curved along Gavin’s jaw. “It’s okay. I was, um, happy to… to do it. For you.” Isaac wet his lips and glanced at the floor. “I’m headed into Burmingham. They’ve got some migraine pills, something with Tylenol and aspirin and caffeine, I think. If you have another migraine before the ri— before the stronger stuff gets in, this will hold it off. And we’re low on food. We need a few things.”

“Oh,” Gavin said flatly. “Um… I w-wish I could, um, come with you, but… I just… don’t feel right, still.”

“…and you’re supposed to be dead,” Isaac said gently.

Gavin’s eyes slid shut. “Right. That, too.” His hand crept out across the sheets and settled on Isaac’s knee. “Be safe.”

“Always try to be,” Isaac said with a wry smile. “Sometimes shit finds me, you know?”

Gavin bit his lip. “I know. But… please… please try.”

Please come back to me. I worry every time you leave.

“Yeah, Gavin. I… I will.” Isaac leaned in and softly kissed the scars on Gavin’s nose, cheek, and eye. “Vera and Tori are coming, too. Gray’s headed into Crayton today. They got a call about a refugee. And Finn and Ellis are gonna be out, too. They wanted to walk south, see if any of the properties that way are occupied.”

“Will… is that safe? With… with the baby?” Gavin glanced up at Isaac.

A slow smile spread across Isaac’s face. “Yeah. Ellis will be fine. They’d punch you for being concerned.”

Gavin huffed out a weak laugh. “Yeah,” he said. “So… Sam and Edrissa? They’ll be home?”

“Yeah,” Isaac said. His hand found Gavin’s and gave a quick squeeze. “I’ve gotta go. Vera and Tori are waiting for me. I just wanted to check on you and make sure you’re okay.”

“Yeah, I’m… I’m good,” Gavin said, and pushed back the covers. “I think I’ll take a shower. And get some water.”

“Just relax today,” Isaac said as he stood. “Finn said the migraines can be caused by stress. Just rest.”

“Yeah,” Gavin groaned as he stretched. “I’ll see you in a few hours.”

“Yeah,” Isaac said, and paused. He quickly stooped and pressed a kiss to Gavin’s cheek, before he straightened with a smile and hurried from the room.

Gavin watched Isaac go, and stared through the doorway for a long while after he left. He drew a hand through his hair and sighed. He slowly pushed himself to his feet and swayed for a moment, putting out a hand to stabilize himself.

“Fuck,” he mumbled. He had to brush his teeth first. Then water, then food. Then shower. He wandered out of his room to the bathroom.

The walls seemed to wobble slightly around him as he made his way down the hall. He flipped on the bathroom light and flinched at the flash of white light that burst inside his head. He peeled his eyes open and stepped up to the sink.

He kept his eyes down from the mirror. Even though it had been weeks, he just… couldn’t bring himself to look in the mirror. He didn’t know what he would see, and it didn’t matter if he didn’t look. He wet his toothbrush, smeared on a bit of toothpaste, and brushed his teeth. It felt good to scrub away the taste in his mouth. When he was done, he bent to take a swallow of water, then another, then another. His throat ached with thirst. He wiped his mouth and wandered into the kitchen.

He pulled a cup down from the cabinet and filled it in the sink. He took a drink, then another, then another. Soon, the cup was empty. He filled it again, and drained it. He looked into the sink and wondered if he could find the tea Edrissa made for him – for Ellis – yesterday.

“Gavin?”

He jumped and whirled around. Edrissa stood in the doorway to the living room, her hands behind her back, looking steadily at Gavin.

Gavin swallowed thickly. “Um… h-hi, Edrissa.”

Edrissa shifted her weight. “Um, hi. Can I… can I ask a favor?”

Gavin gulped and stared at her, bewildered. “Um… yeah?”

Edrissa gave a curt nod and walked through the kitchen and out into the laundry room. She pushed the door open to the outside and disappeared into the yard. Gavin blinked once, and hurried to follow her.

She was halfway across the yard. The sun was already high in the sky, burning away the mist from the night before. Gavin’s stomach bucked as the ground dipped under him. He stumbled after her as she headed towards the barn.

She pushed back the door and glanced behind her to make sure Gavin was still there. He followed her in and stopped just inside the doorway.

“Edrissa, um, h-hey. What… what do you need? Where’s Sam?”

“They’re still sleeping,” she said airily. “And, um, I needed… I couldn’t reach something. There’s a basket on that shelf that I wanted to get.” She pointed at a row of shelves along the wall. There was a woven basket on the top shelf, far out of her reach.

Gavin gave her a hesitant smile. “Oh. I…” A trickle of warmth moved through his chest, surprise and relief and gratitude that Edrissa – Edrissa, of all people – would want his help with something. He turned and walked to the shelf. He had to stretch up on his toes to reach it. His hands closed on the rough wicker rim of it and he turned around to hand it to her.

She was already at his side. She grabbed his arm, twisted, and flipped him over her leg. The basket flew from his hand.

He landed hard on his back. It knocked the wind out of him and he gasped, mouth gaping, his chest aching for air.

Edrissa was on top of him in an instant, straddling his hips. Before he could draw air to ask what the hell she was doing, she had a knife to his throat, pressing up under his chin.

He froze. She stared down at him, her eyes blazing with rage and hate.

He finally dragged in a breath. “Edrissa,” he whispered. “What… what are you—”

“Shut up,” she hissed. Her hand fumbled in his hair and she clumsily jerked his head back. “You, you might have the, the others fooled, but not me.”

A chill moved down Gavin’s spine. His heart pounded in his chest. “Edrissa… I… I don’t know what you’re—”

“Syndicate shit,” she spat. “You, you betrayed them all down south, didn’t you? You… you handed them over to your, your mom, didn’t you?” Her voice rose to a furious, ragged shout.

“No,” Gavin whispered. He winced as the knife’s jagged edge bit into his skin. Tears formed in his eyes. His hands jerked upwards to grab the knife, grab her. He shuddered as a wave of poisonous rage punched through him, filling him up, making him want to throw her off of him and pin her down, hold the knife to her throat, make her feel afraid.

No. He pushed down the rage, the vicious desire to make her hurt and bleed and beg him for mercy. He forced his hands down and pressed them flat against the floor. That’s not who I am anymore.

“I know what you are,” Edrissa snarled. “I know. I know you’re an evil syndicate shit and you can’t change. You can’t stop hurting people. Can’t stop killing.”

“I haven’t killed anyone in—”

Edrissa yanked at his hair. “Shut up,” she whimpered, her voice tight with tears. “Shut, shut up. You— I can’t believe Isaac can’t see it. He… he should hate you. They all should.”

Gavin’s eyes fluttered closed. “I know,” he whispered.

Edrissa paused. Gavin opened his eyes to stare at the ceiling, holding perfectly still. Two tears ran into his hair. The knife trembled against his throat.

“You… you shouldn’t have come back alive,” she hissed.

“I know,” he said weakly.

Edrissa’s face twisted with hate. She pressed the knife harder against his throat. He flinched and forced his hands down harder against the floor. “There’s… there’s nothing good inside you. There’s nothing but evil. You c-can’t change, you can’t be… be redeemed. Syndicate bastards don’t change.”

Gavin pushed out a shuddering breath. “No,” he whispered. “That’s… that’s not true.”

“Yes it is!” she shrieked at him. “You’re all bad, every single one. You all hurt and rape and… and kill…” She gasped and hitched a shaking sob. “You don’t know how to be anything else. And I… I know it.” A tear trailed down her cheek and fell onto his shirt.

“I’m sorry,” Gavin breathed. “I’m sorry that happened to you. But it… it wasn’t—”

“I said shut up!” she sobbed, her face contorted with rage. “I’m… I’m going to kill you, Gavin Stormbeck. I’ve been training for weeks. I know how to kill you.”

Gavin’s stomach lurched. Terror caught in his throat. He could do it, he could tear the knife from her grasp and hold it to her throat. He could cut her, tear into her, lay open her flesh until her screams tapered into dying gasps. He’d done it before. He could make her pay, make her suffer.

No. I’m different. For Isaac. For the others.

For me.

“P-please don’t,” he whispered.

Edrissa blinked. Her hand tightened in Gavin’s hair and she jammed the knife harder against his throat. The serrated edge caught the skin there, but it was dull, not quite breaking through. He hissed in a breath and trembled under her hands.

“Are you… are you going to stop me, syndicate shit?” she whispered, sounding full of rage. Sounding hopeful.

Gavin weakly shook his head, the pain still pounding weakly behind his left eye. “No,” he murmured.

Edrissa’s breath froze in her chest. “Well you… well you should. I… I’m going to kill you, Gavin Stormbeck.” She whimpered, and her hand tightened around the knife.

“My name is Gavin Uriah,” Gavin whispered.

For a moment, neither moved. Gavin lay still, muscles locked, under Edrissa. She trembled as he held Gavin down, the knife still poised at his throat.

“Y-you should stop me,” she whispered. “You should try to, to hurt me. I’m a plaything, right? I deserve to be hurt.” Her lip curled. Her voice lashed him, bitter and poisonous.

“You’re not,” Gavin said evenly, and shook his head. “I’m sorry you ever were. It’s not right. You didn’t deserve it. No one does.”

Edrissa sobbed, helpless. “But I do now, right? I deserve it. For, for saying I’m going to kill you. I should be punished for it. I should… I should die.” Her eyes blazed as she leaned over Gavin, tears running down her cheeks.

“No,” Gavin whispered. “You don’t deserve that.”

Edrissa’s chest heaved with shuddering breaths as her hand tightened in Gavin’s hair. Then, her pain dropped away. Her eyes went dead. She leaned back and held the knife to her own throat. It was a steak knife, heavy and dull, the worn wooden handle held tight in her grip.

“Stop me, Stormbeck,” she said flatly. “This is how you stop me. If you don’t do it, I’m going to kill you.”

Gavin bit his lip and shook his head. “No,” he murmured. “I won’t. My name is Uriah.”

Edrissa snarled and grabbed at Gavin’s wrist. She jerked his hand up off the floor and forced it around the handle of the knife. She wrapped her hand around his and forced the blade against her throat. “Do it,” she hissed. “Syndicate shit.”

Gavin met her eyes. He ached at the depth of hate there, of pain. Of loss. Two years of her life, her childhood, her innocence, her brother. All dead, killed by syndicate hands. Taken and broken, just like Gavin had done with so many lives.

She could be just another life to end. Gavin could press the knife in, rip it through her throat, bleed her out over his hands, watch her die on the floor here. He could tell the others it was self-defense. It would be.

Gavin set his jaw. “No,” he said, fiercely. Evenly.

Edrissa’s eyes went wide. Her hand slipped from around his. He pulled the knife away from her throat.

She buried her face in her hands and wailed.

Gavin tossed the knife away. It skittered into the corner and hit the wall with a light thump. He shifted, rolling slightly to the side, gently placing his hands on her shoulders to ease her off of him. She slumped to her knees and sobbed into her hands, her voice echoing through the barn, her sorrow, her pain, all tearing free at once. Gavin pushed himself backwards on his hands until he was out of her reach. He wrapped his arms around his knees and shivered, his eyes still fixed on her as she fell apart.

“Why won’t you do it?” she sobbed, not looking at him.

“Because… because I don’t want to,” he said, doing his best to make his voice gentle, panting with relief.

“But you’re… you’re a Stormbeck,” she wailed. “You’re one of them. You can’t… why won’t you hurt me? It’s what you… what you are.”

“Not anymore,” Gavin said, his voice tight with tears. “That’s not what I am at all. I’m… I’m not a Stormbeck. I’m Gavin Uriah. I’m not… like that anymore.”

“But why?” she whimpered. She shivered and squeezed her arms around her waist.

Gavin swiped the tears out of his eyes. “I don’t know,” he said, finally.

Edrissa rocked herself, her eyes unfocused and faraway. “You k-killed my brother,” she whispered.

Gavin opened his mouth to defend himself, to tell her it wasn’t him. It wasn’t his family.

It didn’t matter. It didn’t matter to her. It didn’t matter at all.

“I… I was happy,” she whispered. “With my… my parents. I was happy. With Micah. I had… I had a boyfriend.”

Gavin’s eyes slid shut. “I’m sorry,” he whispered.

“I… h-had a cat,” she whimpered. Her voice broke. “I had… a, a life.”

Gavin kept silent. The weight of her sorrow crushed him, pounded in his head. He rubbed at the scratch the knife had left on the soft skin of his throat.

A sob rippled over her shoulders. “I… I just want to stop hurting.” She bit down on her hand and wailed her grief.

“I’m sorry,” Gavin whispered. “I’m so sorry.”

Edrissa sobbed, incoherent words falling from her lips. The sound of her cries shook the air inside the barn. Gavin winced as it pressed against the inside of his skull. He buried his face in his hands and squeezed his eyes shut.

She could kill him like this, if she wanted to. He couldn’t make himself open his eyes. He sat there with her in the cool air of the barn, feeling the ache in his chest. Savoring the air in his lungs. Savoring his life.

Her sobs faded to hitched whimpers. Her whimpers faded to slow, shivering breaths. She raised her eyes and looked at Gavin. For once, for the first time, her eyes weren’t dark with hate and mistrust. She stared at him with fragile, questioning vulnerability. Her gaze landed on his throat, on the scratch there.

Her eyes went wide with horror. She cringed into herself and dragged in a shuddering gasp.

“Oh, no,” she whispered. “N-no, I…”

Gavin swallowed hard. “What?”

“Isaac,” she whimpered. “Isaac’s going to kill me.”

Gavin’s brow furrowed. “What… Edrissa, why?”

She raised a shaking hand to her neck. “I… He… he’s going to, to know that I… and then he…” She pressed her hand to her mouth and sobbed helplessly, her eyes wide and staring at nothing. “He… he’s going to… he almost did, be, before…”

“No,” Gavin croaked, rubbing harder at the scratch. The skin didn’t even feel broken. “No, he’s not.”

“He will,” Edrissa whispered into her hand. “When he comes back. I… both the cars are gone, I can’t… can’t run…”

“He’s not going to kill you, Edrissa,” Gavin said softly. “Because he’s not like that.”

“Y-yes he is,” she said through her teeth, her eyes desperate. “He… he’s a killer.”

Gavin’s throat bobbed. His lips trembled, and he pressed them together. “Well… yeah. He is. But he won’t kill you. You’re in the family. And he won’t know, because—”

“He will—”

“—I’m not going to tell him.”

Edrissa caught her breath and raised her eyes, fogged with terror, to Gavin’s. “What?” she whispered.

Gavin chewed his lip. “I’m not going to tell him. He doesn’t need to know. Nothing happened, right?”

Edrissa stared at Gavin, trembling, her mouth slightly open. “I… what?”

Gavin shrugged jerkily. “Nothing happened. We talked. We figured some shit out. Right? Nothing bad happened.”

Edrissa’s hand drifted to her neck. “But you—”

“That could have happened so many different ways,” Gavin said, his voice tight. “Shaving accident. Picked up the cat and he didn’t like it. Walked into a door.” His lips pulled into a half-smile. “Or I don’t have to say anything.”

“H-he’ll ask—”

“So what if he does? Edrissa…” She went still at her name. He shook his head. “I’m not… g-going to let… anything bad, um, happen. To you.”

Her lips twisted in an echo of bitterness.

Gavin hung his head. “Okay… yeah. Bad choice of words. All I’m saying is…” He held up his hands in a placating gesture. “I’m not going to tell Isaac what happened. And even if he knew, he wouldn’t kill you. I mean…” Gavin laughed, dryly. “After everything I’ve done to him…”

“But it’s different,” she mumbled. “Because you’re…”

“Yeah,” Gavin said with a heavy breath. “Because we.”

They were both silent for a long time. Finally, Gavin stirred. “Um… do you want some… some breakfast? Or tea? Or… I can make eggs benedict—”

“No thank you,” Edrissa said quietly, her eyes cast down to the floor.

Gavin’s shoulders slumped. “Right. Um, well… I’m… kind of hungry. I want to go make something. Will you… are you… okay?”

She wiped her nose and glanced up at him. “Yeah.”

Gavin held still. “Okay. Can you… not try to kill me again?”

Edrissa barked out a painful-sounding laugh. “Yeah.”

Gavin bit his lip. “…promise?”

She tossed her head and tucked her hair behind her ears. “Yeah,” she murmured. “Promise.”

“Okay,” Gavin breathed. “Can I… g-get the steak knife, then?”

She glanced into the corner where Gavin tossed it. “Yeah. I’ll, um… I’ll come inside in a while. I just want to be alone right, um, right now.”

“Okay.” Gavin got to his feet and fell a step back from her. “Um… I… I h-heard you made some, um, really good tea for Ellis. Can I, um, have some?”

She tipped her head back and raised an eyebrow. “I know it was for you. I’m not an idiot.”

Gavin blanched. “Oh. Right. Um…” He shoved his hands in his pockets. “Well, thanks for not, um, poisoning it or something.”

Edrissa looked at him impassively for a moment. “Yeah,” she finally whispered.

“Okay, well… I guess I’ll… go.” He turned and shuffled towards the barn door. On his way out, he stooped and picked up the knife.

“Thank you,” Edrissa called out behind him, tears tight in her voice.

“Yeah,” he rasped. “Thank you, too.”

Continued here

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whump-tr0pes · 4 years

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Honor Bound 4 - 18

Honor Bound 4 - 18 (Undeserved Reputation) @badthingshappenbingo

Requested by @whumps-the-word

This is a series. Start here, continued from here.

This is a sequel to Honor Bound, Honor Bound 2, Honor Bound 3.

AO3

Cw: past captivity, implied whump of a minor, PTSD, dissoci@tion, death mention

Gray smiled gently as they drove, avoiding potholes in the road caused not by violence, but by the simple, innocent freeze and thaw of the ground. The sun was already high in the sky after more than three hours of driving. The sky was clear, the air clean and cool with the northern summer that was already well under way.

Edrissa sat in the passenger seat, almost completely turned around, chattering happily to Vera in the back seat. Every now and then, Gray and Vera met eyes in the rear view, and Gray could read something like gratitude in her gaze.

“…and there’s this store in Crayton that sells three different kinds of lace!” Edrissa said, the wispy blonde bun at the top of her head bobbing along as she spoke. “And there’s a lot of cotton, I mean, obvious, but they also sometimes have some nice linen and I think that’s what I’ll make Sam’s sling out of, so it breathes. Because it gets hotter up here than I thought it would, because I thought it wouldn’t get very hot at all and it’s already May and it’s been pretty warm, and the winter was so cold so I just kind of assumed it would stay cold. I mean, it’s been nice outside. Maybe when it gets a little warmer we can go hang out at the lake, maybe do a picnic, I mean it’s not very far from the house but it’s really pretty and I’ve already been in it and it doesn’t go that deep, but it is really cold. Before that I hadn’t been swimming in so long. But yeah, I think I’ll do the sling out of linen, and I hope they have blue because that’s Sam’s favorite color.”

She paused to take a breath. Vera grinned at her.

“It is Sam’s favorite color,” Vera said, and Gray was tempted to give Vera a conspiratory nudge. “What else have you been up to while we’ve b-been—” Her voice wavered for just a moment. “—gone?”

“Um…” Edrissa’s mouth twisted and she leaned towards Vera. “Yeah, um, a lot. Gray said, Gray said I could paint my room if I wanted, but I haven’t found the right color. They’re all so… so garish.” Edrissa flipped the stray wisps of hair out of her face and looked to Vera, eyebrows raised, as if she was waiting for something.

It was so good to see Edrissa looking for Vera to assure her not that she was safe, but that she was… cool.

“Absolutely,” Vera said with fervor. “Sometimes walls just need to look sophisticated.” Edrissa lifted her chin, and her mouth pulled into a wider smile at the word.

“Exactly,” she said with an emphatic nod. “Sophisticated. I was thinking I could do a whole thing with a mirror on the wall and, and maybe a nice painting if I can find one that captures the… the…” Edrissa stumbled for a moment, her eyes still fixed on Vera. “…the atmosphere I want.”

Sadness dragged at Gray’s heart. She hasn’t been allowed to make her own choices, any choices for two years. And I remember how much I just wanted to be me when I was eighteen.

They pressed their lips into a line to stop the corners of their mouth from falling.

“That sounds like such a great idea,” Vera said, her face breaking into a smile again. “And… Tori and I wanted to start a garden out back. It’s a little late for planting, but… if we get seedlings, would you want something?”

“Yes!” Edrissa cried, and distractedly tapped Gray on the shoulder. For a moment Vera looked at Gray in delighted surprise. Edrissa hadn’t let anyone but Tori and Vera touch her since she’d been rescued almost five months ago. Gray knew the easy touch on their shoulder spoke volumes of the healing she’d done just in the past three weeks.

I wonder how much of that is time away from Gavin. Gray pushed the thought out of their head.

“Oh, my god, I totally forgot. Last time I was in Burmingham, they had little mint plants. Gray said they wanted some, and I forgot!” She turned to Gray with an unsteady smile. “I’m sorry, I—” Edrissa shivered. Her eyes went distant. She curled into herself slightly, shrinking back against the door of the car.

“It’s alright, Edrissa,” Gray said gently, never taking their eyes off the road. “I’m not hurt. I’m not angry. It’s just a mistake, right? Mistakes are alright.”

“Mm-hm,” Edrissa said uncertainly. She relaxed slightly.

“Remember your counting?” Gray said, low and calm.

Edrissa jerked her head in a nod. She took in a deep breath. “One two three four five,” she muttered, and shook out her hands at the wrists with each number.

“Good. Let’s do it again, together.” Gray’s hands were steady on the wheel, never faltering. Watching the pavement of the road disappear under their car.

Edrissa drew in another deep breath. “One two three four five,” she and Gray said together as she shook out her hands, her quavering voice mixing with Gray’s steady one.

“One more time. Deep breath, one two three four five.” This time, Edrissa, Vera, and Gray said it together.

Gray glanced at Edrissa, at how her shoulders hunched just a little more than they had before, at the dullness in her eyes that reminded them so much of… of Vera, when she was under. Their mouth made a hard line.

“S-sorry,” Edrissa murmured. “I j-just…”

“It’s alright, Edrissa,” Gray said evenly, passing the first few houses on the north outskirts of Crayton. “Everyone has moments, and you were just having a moment.”

“Having a moment,” Edrissa said softly. “Just having a moment.” She smiled tightly at Vera, the corners of her mouth twisting in embarrassment.

Gray’s heart ached for Edrissa, for the girl who had just been going on and on about her room and her fabrics not thirty seconds ago and was now trembling, embarrassed, frightened. Vera leaned forward and put her hand palm up on the center console. An invitation, not a demand. Edrissa fit her hand into Vera’s, and Vera squeezed.

“Tell me more about what plants you want.”

Edrissa offered a wider smile. “Um, I like osteospermum,” she said, her eyes shifting down. “And sunflowers. I like the tall kinds of flowers.” She looked up at Vera. “I had to get a book on plants that do okay with the, the climate up here, because down south it was always—” She cut herself off and swallowed hard. “I like the colorful tall kinds of plants. I’d try for a rosebush but I think it’s too hard for this year.”

“Hm.” Vera nodded. “Well, I’d like to try some raspberry and strawberry bushes. And we could build a shade for the garden, in case the sun is too much.”

“Y-yeah,” Edrissa said softly. She sat back slightly in her seat until Gray pulled onto the main street of shops. They eased the car into a spot along the sidewalk. When Gray stopped, Edrissa shook herself slightly and looked up.

Gray put the car in park. “I was thinking you two could get out here,” they said, indicating with their hand the store that had regular deliveries of fabrics. “I should go to the town hall and check in with Daniel Schiester. I understand your check-in was… rushed.”

“And good fucking thing, too,” Vera said quietly, her jaw clenching shut.

Gray dipped their head. “I don’t exactly appreciate the way he’s spoken to you in the past, so I thought I would make this visit alone. Make sure he feels in control of the situation. Stroke his comically over-inflated ego.”

“I swear to god, he’d make a great fucking syndicate leader,” Vera said, rolling her eyes. She opened the door and climbed out, moving stiffly. Edrissa got out, too, and drifted to Vera’s side.

Gray rolled the passenger window down and leaned towards it. “Shouldn’t take longer than twenty minutes. If you move on from here and I don’t catch you, I’ll meet you in the square in an hour, and we can get lunch. Sound like a plan?”

Vera nodded and cocked her eyebrow. “Have fun with DFS,” she said, snidely.

Gray’s brow furrowed. “DFS?”

Vera bent forward and leaned into the car. “Daniel. Fucking. Schiester,” she said, her voice nearly gleeful with contempt.

Gray snorted and leaned back. “Ah. I’ll have to try not to call him that to his face.”

Vera straightened and shrugged. “If you do, get pictures of his reaction.”

Gray laughed and put the car in drive. “See you soon,” they said, and pulled away.

∴

As Gray got closer to the town hall, their hands tightened on the wheel. Something itched in the back of their mind, something about how Daniel looked at Vera with fascination, with humor. As if he was watching a dog performing tricks. Saccharine. Amused.

Something in the back of their mind stirred at how Daniel looked at Gavin.

There was something there, between them. Gray doubted they had ever actually met. Perhaps it was just morbid, spiteful fascination on Daniel’s part, fascination with the syndicates who ruined the lives of the victims he saw every day. Perhaps it was buried rage, resentment that people like Gavin’s family were the reason Crayton had to exist at all.

Perhaps it was something else, though Gray wasn’t sure what.

Gray pulled in front of the town hall and parked the car. They sat quiet in the seat, staring at the front door, already feeling the tension headache starting. They breathed a sigh, turned off the car, and got out.

Inside the atrium it was cool, dark, and empty, just like it almost always was when refugees weren’t being processed. Gray’s hands tightened into fists and they began to climb the stairs to Daniel’s office.

The stairs creaked under Gray’s feet, their footsteps muffled by the dark green carpet. They made their way to the landing and turned in the direction of Daniel’s office. They almost hoped he wasn’t in today. Their hands clenched tighter as they walked down the hallway, almost feeling the urge to tiptoe, to not make any noise.

Gray grimaced. I’m being ridiculous.

They stopped in front of the door to Daniel’s office. They knocked.

“Come in,” came the deep, even voice. Gray’s face fell. They turned the handle and pushed the door open.

Daniel glanced up from his work on his computer, then looked up and pushed himself away from his desk. “Mx. Uriah,” he said, standing, and held out his hand. “Always good to see you.”

Gray’s skin felt cold as they shook Daniel’s hand once.

“Mr. Mayor,” they said stiffly.

“Ah,” Daniel said with a smile. “I suppose if I wanted you to call me by my first name, I should have begun with that courtesy. Forgive me.”

“Old habits, on my end,” Gray said, and forced their mouth into a smile.

“Right.” Daniel sat back into his chair and leaned his elbows on the desk. “What can I help you with?”

Gray had to stop themself from staring at the pictures of refugees on the walls. Those pictures definitely weren’t of every single refugee Daniel had saved, they couldn’t be. There couldn’t have been more than forty or fifty people in those pictures, and Gray knew Crayton could see that many in a busy week. Maybe those refugees held some meaning for Daniel. Gray didn’t want to pry.

If they were perfectly honest with themself, they didn’t want to ask.

“I’m sure at this point that you are aware that my family has returned from the south?” Gray said, meeting Daniel’s eyes.

Daniel grinned. “Ah. Yes. The triumphant heroes return, quite successful, I’m given to understand. Colleen Stormbeck is dead, and the region is destabilized.”

“That’s right,” Gray said. “They were successful, although at great cost to themselves.”

Daniel’s mouth turned down. “You don’t mean that any of them died…?” He turned to rifle through some papers on his desk. “When my people checked them in, all six were—”

“They all came back alive, yes,” Gray said, their heart twinging. Their gaze fell. “But they all came back with some sort of… permanent… mental or physical scarring.”

“Hm.” Daniel leaned back and folded his hands in his lap. “When you say they all came back alive, I’m assuming you’re not including the Stormbeck boy in your count.”

Gray blew out a slow breath. “When he left here, his name was Gavin Uriah.” They raised their gaze to meet Daniel’s, his eyes a cold blue that always seemed to pierce through Gray. “But yes. He is dead.”

Daniel huffed out a silent laugh. “Generous of you to allow him to take your name, considering everything he’s d—”

“I don’t wish to discuss the rehabilitation of Gavin Uriah,” Gray said softly, their cheeks reddening. “I am fully aware of your opinion of him, and of redemption in general. The fact is when he left here, I had become rather fond of him. And I’d like to let his memory remain for me what he was: a broken boy who died trying to set things right.” Gray’s stomach churned.

Daniel was silent for a moment, regarding Gray coolly across his desk. After a long moment he nodded and said, “Just more evidence for the syndicates’ cruelty, then. I’m sorry your family was the target.”

“So am I,” Gray murmured. They glanced around the office and returned their gaze to Daniel. “But they had to check in with your people in the dead of night and move on without proper processing, as one of them was gravely injured. I wanted to make sure nothing was missed, and answer any questions you had.”

“No, nothing was missed,” Daniel said with a winning smile, waving his hand. “I know that your team arrived in no condition to follow protocol, and the people who checked them in are very thorough.”

��Good,” Gray murmured. The hair on the back of their neck tingled. “Did you need anything from me?”

“Actually, I could use your assistance,” Daniel said with a smile. “Due to the instability of the western region, we are already seeing an increase in the frequency and number of refugees, and am very certain that will only continue to increase. Summer is always a busy season for us, but I am anticipating unprecedented numbers. At the moment, I currently don’t have the people to handle this efficiently. Your family is particularly suited to assisting with refugees, given the nature of your work. I was hoping to recruit you in the processing, if you’re able.”

Gray nodded. “Of course. I can’t speak for the others as they are all convalescing, but I would be happy to help. I will pass on the request. I have no doubt they will offer what they can, as soon as they are able to travel. A few of them may be ready now.”

“Whatever you can do will be appreciated,” Daniel said, and stood, offering Gray his hand. Gray took it. “Always a pleasure, Gray. When you and your family are ready we will orient you with our process.”

Gray nodded. “I’ll keep you posted. Until then, stay well, Daniel.”

“Thank you.” Daniel smiled and sat down. He turned back to his work.

Gray turned and left the office, closing the door behind them. They walked down the hall, their steps quickening, their shoulders tightening. They made their way down the stairs and across the atrium. By the time they pushed through the doors out into the sun, they were nearly jogging.

Continued here

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whump-tr0pes · 4 years

Text

HB4-26/Whumptober day 4

This is a series. Start here, continued from here.

This is a sequel to Honor Bound, Honor Bound 2, Honor Bound 3.

AO3

Masterlist

Content warning: past branding, self-image issues with scars, discussion of captivity and human trafficking, mild self-harm themes throughout

Finn reached over to the table beside the couch and took another sip of their tea. It had a strong, spicy, almost bitter flavor, swirling through the warmth of the cinnamon and cloves mixed in. Chicory, Gray called it, although Finn had never had it before. Apparently it grew pretty well up where it was colder, and with it so difficult to get coffee…

It was getting easier every day, though. Shipments of coffee, flour, and vegetables were arriving north every day, pulled off of syndicate supply lines with almost no resistance.

Shipments of people, too. People were coming north, lone people and families and groups. Gray had asked the family yesterday if they’d be willing to drive south to Crayton sometimes and help Daniel Schiester process the refugees as they came through. Finn was happy to do it. They’d be happy to.

As soon as I take a fucking break.

The mug sat forgotten in Finn’s hand until they took another distracted sip. Their eyes focused as they turned to set it down on the side table—

The nearly jumped as they realized Edrissa was standing, perfectly silent, beside the table. Ellis was looking at her with a smile.

“Do you— Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you,” Edrissa said, and Finn distractedly waved the apology away. Edrissa’s eyes flicked from the cup on tea on the table to Finn’s face. “Do you like it?”

Finn glanced at the tea, then stared, slightly bewildered, at Edrissa. “Um… yeah?”

Edrissa grinned and flushed. “Good. I got it from this store in Crayton that sells teas and herbs and things, and I love how chicory smells, and they’ve been using it kind of like coffee up here when it’s scarce, but I think it’s so nice as a tea because it works so well with cinnamon and cloves, you know, and sometimes just a tiny bit of pepper if you want to heat it up for a winter drink, and I just thought the family might like it since it’s just such a different flavor. And it grows on the side of the road up here! There’s a lot of it that grows on the road south of Crayton, we just didn’t see it because of the snow last time. It has these really nice blue flowers and that’s how you know it. But I was just hoping you’d like the tea, because it’s not… really…” Edrissa trailed off, her lips twisting in a conspiratory grin. “…it’s not everyone’s, um, cup of tea, I’m sorry, that was a terrible joke, but…” She waved at the tea and smiled shyly. “Yeah. I’m just glad you like it.”

Finn blinked and stared for a moment longer. They swallowed. The thoughts that moved through their head edged through slowly, as if through a fog. They’d been foggy in the past few days since reaching north. Probably the sleep deprivation. They shook their head and glanced at the tea.

“It’s great, Edrissa,” Ellis said beside Finn. “The tea is fucking awesome.” Finn glanced at them, and they glared softly at Finn, tilting their head towards Edrissa.

“Yeah,” Finn said flatly, and reached out to take the mug again. “It’s pretty nice. Tastes like… like cinnamon on steroids, I guess.”

Edrissa grinned. “Yeah! And like a little hint of—” She went white and cut herself off with a gasp. She was staring at Finn’s forearm.

Finn flushed deeply with shame and jerked their hand back. They dragged the long sleeve of their shirt down to cover the mostly-healed brand that marred the inside of their forearm.

They’d rolled up their sleeves for a moment, while they were thinking, looking over their and Ellis’s puzzle on the table. Looking for pieces of the horses that galloped through the field of the puzzle, now that the sky was already done. They always started with the sky, always, back when—

And now, Edrissa was looking at them with a mix of horror and pity that made their skin fucking crawl.

“Oh,” Edrissa breathed. “They, um… they—”

“Branded me, yeah,” Finn ground out through their teeth. There was no need to fucking worry, they’d taken off the bandage for the last time a few days before they’d escaped. It was healing. It wasn’t going to get infected. They’d find a way to cover it up. It was fine. It was fine.

Edrissa covered her hands with her mouth. “I’m so sorry,” she said softly, the words muffled behind her hands.

“’s fine,” Finn grumbled, huddling back against the couch, wishing for the world that they could disappear into the cushions. With Edrissa on one side, Ellis on the other, and the coffee table holding the puzzle in front of them, they couldn’t easily leave. Couldn’t easily go hide in their room or in the laundry room or leave the damned house entirely, just run and run until their feet ached and their lungs burned and they could leave this fucking moment behind.

Edrissa dropped her hands and reached for the sleeve of her own shirt. She pulled her right sleeve up past her forearm to her elbow, revealing the scar there: a flat burn over the tattoo that had marked her as a plaything for two years. Her hand shook and she let her sleeve go.

“I… I kn-know—”

“Edrissa, don’t,” Finn said heavily, and let their face fall into their hands. Edrissa went silent beside them.

“Finn…” Ellis said as they put a soft hand on their shoulder. “It’s not her f—”

“I’m not saying it is,” Finn said. “I never said that. I’m just saying I don’t want to talk about it.”

“It’d be good if you got that off,” Edrissa said softly.

Finn raised their head to look at her. “What?”

“I mean…” Edrissa’s lips trembled and she bit down on them. “Um… If you’re ever seen, I mean, if anyone ever sees that, the… the wrong people…” She trailed off into a whisper. She looked at Finn with heavy implication. “You could be, um, taken. Taken back, and, I mean—”

“What, to the Stormbecks?” Finn said bitterly. They dragged a hand through their hair. “The Stormbecks are fucking dead, Edrissa.” Edrissa flinched weakly beside them. Finn hung their head. “S-sorry. I’m sorry. I just mean… The Stormbecks won’t be looking for me because they’re gone. There’s no one to sell me to.”

“There is,” Edrissa said, and Finn lifted their gaze to her. “Um… I heard you t-talk about, um… G-Gavin’s cousin once. He has a cousin. And if he wanted you…”

“Mark doesn’t know about us,” Finn said, feeling exhaustion dragging them down.

How long have I been this tired?

Have I been making mistakes this entire time?

“But what if he does?” Edrissa said, her small frame trembling. “He’s still alive. What if he heard about you while you were, um, south? What if he… he wants you back? What if he and Gavin—” Edrissa’s mouth shut with a snap.

Finn peered up at her. “What if he and… and Gavin, what?”

She slowly shook her head. “N-nothing. Um. Nothing. It’s nothing.”

Finn held her gaze for a moment longer before they slumped forward again.

“Finn…” Ellis said weakly beside them. “Maybe… maybe it’s not a bad idea.”

Finn’s head snapped up. “What?”

Ellis swallowed hard and glanced at Edrissa, then back to Finn. “I mean… if the brand marks you…”

“It doesn’t mark me,” Finn said, a bubble of fragile rage rising inside them. “It… it reminds me. Of what Coll— of what the syndicates did.” Their left hand went to wrap around their arm over the brand. “It shows what I went through. It shows I survived. It shows that there are people out there who are evil and that we beat them.”

“It also shows that you can be sold back to them if you’re found,” Ellis said, a hardness in their eyes.

“I won’t be found,” Finn spat back, the rage quickly giving way to fear. “I won’t. We’re… we’re safe up here. We’re going to stay safe. I can’t be… c-can’t be sold back…” When did their hands start shaking? Their fingers dug harder into the brand. The pain stabbed through their fear.

“Finn,” Ellis said gently. “Babe.” They reached out and pulled Finn’s hand away from the brand. It stung in the open air. “I’m just saying… I’m sorry. We’re just saying that having something on you that marks you as Stormbeck-owned can bring… nothing but good.”

“But…” Finn’s eyes burned with tears. Why were they reacting this way? It was a brand that was burned into their skin, showing them as property. As a slave. They should want it off. They should want to gnaw their own arm off to get it off them. They should want to cover it like Isaac covered his scars, cowering away from the world as if their eyes burned him. They should feel shame. They should feel terror.

“But… it’s the only scar from her that I ha-have.”

Ellis froze, their eyes darting between Finn’s. Then, they leaned back, and something blazed in their eyes that made Finn shiver.

“We can make it so there’s still a scar,” Ellis whispered.

Edrissa took in a sharp breath next to them. Finn couldn’t look at her. “But… you should… you should want it gone. You should— Why would you want… something from, from them, on—”

“Should nothing, Edrissa,” Ellis said tightly, their blue-green-grey eyes still locked on Finn’s, and Finn could have melted, could have kissed them, for understanding. For knowing. “Sometimes you need scars.”

“N-no you, you don’t,” Edrissa murmured, and the floor creaked as she took a step back. “You don’t want—”

“Everyone heals differently,” Ellis said, finally breaking eye contact and glancing over Finn’s shoulder to look at Edrissa. “Some people wish their bodies were healed again. Like Isaac. And some…” Ellis’s hand wrapped around Finn’s and squeezed. “…some need the scar. As a distraction. As a reminder.”

Finn squeezed back. They knew about Ellis’s scars all too well.

“Um…” Finn glanced up at Edrissa. Her eyes were wide, angry, her hand clutching her forearm over her own scar. “I still think you should, um, have it off. For our… to keep us safe.”

Finn’s mouth pressed into a hard line. “I… I can… I’ll think about it.”

“That is actually a good idea, babe,” Ellis said, and Finn softened a little. “I know we’re north, but… if you’ll be helping with the refugees, and you’ll be in Crayton… Shit-ster said the syndicates send agents through and… all it takes is one… one of them to see… just for a second…”

Finn rolled their eyes. “I’m not exactly basing any of my actions on the word of that piece of shi—”

“It’s our family, Finn,” Ellis said, sharpness finding its way into their voice for the first time. “It puts our family at… at risk.” Ellis licked their lips and looked at Finn, their eyes pleading, angry. “It’s our… our family.”

Tears prickled Finn’s eyes and they stared at the table, their eyes moving sightlessly over the puzzle. Swirls of color, it’s all it was, all anything ever was. They swallowed the lump in their throat.

“Fine,” they said heavily. “I’ll start researching, um, safe ways to remove brands.”

Ways to reduce pain didn’t enter their mind. They were so far beyond caring.

Continued here

#honor bound 4 #whumptober2020 #no. 14 #branding #OC #fic #self-image issues tw #human trafficking mention tw #self harm tw #edrissa: mystery girl #Edrissa rants about pretty things #past captivity #fuckin' Mark #trauma recovery #scars #Fillis

54 notes · View notes

whump-tr0pes · 4 years

Text

HB4-35/Whumptober day 16

This is a series. Start here, continued from here.

This is a sequel to Honor Bound, Honor Bound 2, Honor Bound 3, and Vera.

AO3

Masterlist

Content warning: death mention, getting knocked out, consensual sex mention, mention of baby in imagined peril (that never happens)

@eatyourdamnpears, this one’s for you

As Gray pulled back up to the house in the family’s beat-up car, Isaac sagged with exhaustion. Fifty-six refugees. Isaac had processed fifty-six saved lives with Gray, Schiester, and the three other people who’d been able to volunteer their time. Isaac had done the preliminary paperwork on most of them, and it was as if their images were burned into the backs of his eyes.

He’d only ever been able to save people in ones and twos, sometimes the occasional family. But… fifty-six people. He’d helped with fifty-six people’s rescues today.

He wondered, then, why he felt so empty.

He felt scraped raw, dragged over rocky ground. Every single one of those people had a story like his, or worse. Every single one had lost someone along the way. Their lives had all been destroyed, in one way or another, by the syndicates Isaac had spent his life trying to destroy. An entire life of effort, and there were still broken people heading for the promise of freedom. He’d spent his entire life fighting a threat that still sucked people in and spat them out like some fucked up industrial machine.

But… fifty-six lives.

I just did paperwork.

He clenched his hand into a fist and squeezed his eyes shut, forcing back the thoughts that were more familiar to him than breathing. Invasive thoughts, Gray called them. Isaac still hadn’t read the book Gray had given him for the thoughts, but he understood the basic premise.

He also understood the only way to fight them was to just… let them go. Totally easy.

Gray put the car in park and glanced at him as they turned it off. “Everything okay?” they said gently. They sounded tired, too.

“Y-yeah,” he croaked, relaxing his hand. “Just… thinking.”

“Hm,” Gray murmured, and pulled the keys out of the ignition. They got out of the car and left the keys on the seat. They’d done that at Tori’s house, but it still made Isaac dizzy.

I’ve never been this safe in my entire life.

“You hungry?” Gray said, and Isaac realized they were waiting for him to get out. He staggered to his feet, stretching his legs after the long car ride from Crayton.

“Yeah,” Isaac said, stretching his hands over his head, yawning. The sky was streaked with color, and the sun was minutes from setting behind the house. “I could eat.” In truth, he was starving. He just wasn’t sure he had the energy to cook a whole meal.

I wonder if I could convince Gavin that the cooking practice would be good for him…

He smiled and shook his head as he followed Gray inside.

In the kitchen, Tori, Ellis, and Finn all stood in the kitchen talking. As soon as Isaac and Gray walked in, they fell silent, gigantic grins on their faces. Finn crossed their arms and leaned against a counter. They jerked as if they’d been shocked and let their arms fall to their sides. Isaac raised an eyebrow, a smile playing at his lips.

“Um… guys?” he said, glancing at Gray. They looked equally curious. “What’s up?”

Finn and Ellis exchanged a glance, conspiratory grins pulling wider.

“Go get the others,” Ellis said.

“Gotta tell you something,” Finn said at the same time.

Isaac’s eyes narrowed, and he smiled wider. “Okay… where is everyone?”

Ellis waved their hand dismissively in the direction of the bedrooms. “Gavin ran into the bedroom as soon as he heard the car coming,” they sighed. “Vera, Edrissa, and Sam are in the barn. Sparring,” Ellis deepened their voice and widened their eyes. “Edrissa’s turning into a deadly assassin.”

Isaac snorted. “She’s doing really well, yeah,” he said gently.

“I’ll get Gavin,” Gray said, resting a hand on Isaac’s shoulder. “You want to go get the others?”

“Sure,” Isaac said, and walked towards the back of the house. His cheeks flushed at the knowing smiles the others shared as he passed. He left the kitchen and went out into the yard.

He tilted his head back and smiled, breathing in the cool air off the lake. The sky was fading to a dusty pink, the deep purple of the sky above the clouds showing in slits. As he walked through the grass to the barn, he felt the heaviness of the day fall away, just a little. He’d done his best today, and now he was home.

As he walked towards the barn, he heard a thump. He tilted his head at the sound.

Thump.

He walked through the open door. Sam was sitting cross-legged on the wood floor, their arm in its sling, and staring at Edrissa and Vera where they stood in the middle of the barn floor. Vera held a thick pad along the left side of her body and she crouched behind it, protecting her head, chest, and flank. Edrissa stood in front of her, her hands raised in fists. She lurched forward and swung her leg around, kicking the pad with all her might.

Thump.

Isaac smiled and stepped into the barn. A floorboard squeaked. Vera looked up, her face pulling into a smile. Edrissa started a kick. Vera let the pad drop to her side as she straightened. Edrissa’s foot smacked against the side of Vera’s head.

Vera’s face went slack, and she was out before she hit the ground.

Isaac lunged towards her, his hands outstretched. She crumpled to the floor. Edrissa stumbled back, her hands pressed to her mouth, her eyes wide with terror. Sam’s left hand stretched out in front of them, halfway up on their knees. Isaac stared, dumbfounded, at Vera where she lay on the floor.

Vera blinked slowly and looked around, her hand going to her head. She opened and closed her jaw and shook her head. Her gaze found Edrissa.

“I…” Edrissa whispered. She trembled and cringed back into herself. “I… I am… so, so sorry…” Her lips trembled and her eyes shone with tears. “Vera…”

Vera was already getting up. Isaac was by her side in a heartbeat, steadying her with his hands on her shoulders. “Whoa. You good?”

Vera distractedly put her hand over Isaac’s. She turned dazed eyes on Edrissa. Edrissa took a step back.

“I’m sorry… please…”

Vera blinked and moved her jaw again. She gently massaged the spot.

“Nice shot,” she rasped.

Edrissa went perfectly still. “Nice…?”

Vera laughed dryly and grasped at Isaac’s arm. She let him pull her to her feet. She swayed in place, her eyes closing slowly again, before she smiled. She winced and put her hand to her face. “You found my knockout button,” she said, shaking her head.

Edrissa stared at Vera, her gaze pleading and terrified but… hopeful. “Your…?”

“Um.” Vera swallowed thickly. “Everyone’s got a ‘knockout button.’” She pointed to the joint of her jaw. “Right about here. You hit that just right, they’re out like a light for a few seconds, or more.”

“I’m… s-sorry I hit you,” Edrissa whispered.

“It’s okay,” Vera said, smiling wider now. “I let my guard down. I… guess I underestimated you, for a moment. She arched an eyebrow at Edrissa. “Remind me to not do that again.”

A watery smile played at Edrissa’s lips. “Are you… mad?”

Vera laughed again, louder, and shook her head. “I’m not mad. That was a good kick. We were still practicing, and I let my guard down. It’s not your fault.” She smiled wider. “I swear, Edrissa. Not mad. I’m… impressed.”

“Really?” Edrissa murmured, and wrapped her arms around her waist.

Sam got to their feet and went to her side. She blushed a furious red as they took her hand.

When did that happen?

Isaac smiled. They’re good for each other. And they’re sweet.

Vera smoothed her hair and dusted off her clothes. “Really. I’m not mad.” She glanced at Isaac, still looking slightly dazed. “What’s up? Glad to see you back. How was the day?”

“Um, good,” Isaac said, and shrugged. “The others want to tell us something, though? They asked me to come get you.”

Vera’s eyes sparkled with a knowing smile. Isaac’s brow furrowed.

“Come on,” Vera said quietly, excitement lacing her voice. “Let’s go talk, then.” She turned and walked out of the barn, Edrissa on her heels. She pulled Sam behind her. They turned back and looked at Isaac with a dopey smile, and he found himself grinning back.

They deserve to have this good thing.

Isaac felt a sudden flood of gratitude for Edrissa.

As they made their way back to the house, Isaac shivered in the sudden cool of the night without the sun to warm him. He rubbed his hands up and down his arms. The cuts there were healed. His back, not quite yet, but his arms were healed.

As he walked back into the warmth of the house he was greeted by the sight of Tori, Ellis, Finn, Gray, and Gavin all standing in the kitchen, looking expectantly at him and the other three. Gavin had a flush on his face and a shy smile that made Isaac blush. He suddenly wanted nothing more than to throw Gavin against the fridge and—

“So what’s the news?” Gray said, looking from Ellis to Finn to Tori and back. Their eyes stayed on Ellis, and they chewed their lip.

“Um…” Finn looked at Ellis and gulped loudly. They pulled Ellis firmly into their arms and pressed a kiss against the side of their head.

“I’m pregnant,” Ellis said with a rush of breath.

“Oh,” Edrissa whispered.

Isaac’s mouth fell open. He looked from Ellis to Finn, waiting for them to say they were joking and that this had been a great prank. They both looked at the family with radiant smiles. Finn’s eyes were filled with tears. He glanced at Tori, and she was staring at Ellis with something close to rapture on her face. A tear rolled down her cheek.

“R-really?” Isaac breathed. “You’re… you’re having a baby?”

Ellis laughed, and the sound was free, and light, and happy. “Yeah, dumbass,” they said, leaning against Finn. “That’s what happens when you’re pregnant.”

Isaac stood still for a moment longer. Then he lunged forward and threw his arms around them both.

“I can’t believe it!” Sam said, their voice high and airy, their chest heaving with half-laughter, half -sobs. “I… can’t believe it!”

“That’s… that’s great,” Gray said behind him, and it sounded like they were holding back tears. “Really… really fantastic.” They stepped forward and put a hand on Ellis’s shoulder. Vera went to Tori’s side and they wrapped their arms around each other. Vera pressed a kiss against Tori’s forehead, and Tori smiled at the touch.

“How… when…?” Isaac gasped, and pulled away from the hug. His eyes darted between them.

Finn turned red from the collar of their shirt to the roots of their hair. “Um…”

“Sex, and recently?” Ellis said, playfully shoving Isaac.

“N-no, I mean…” Isaac drew a hand through his hair. “I… I just… now? I… wow.”

“Yeah, wow works,” Finn said, looking slightly stunned. “It’s… pretty crazy.”

“Yeah, Jesus. But… good timing.” The breath caught in Isaac’s throat, a sudden vision of Ellis, pregnant in Colleen’s house, chained to a bed to give birth if they lived that long, and the baby…

He shuddered and pushed the vision out of his mind. He focused again on Ellis’s face.

They were looking over his shoulder. “Hey, dumbass,” they said, a little tightly, but still with a smile. “You gonna get your ass over here and congratulate me, or what?”

Isaac glanced behind him and saw Gavin go beet red. “Oh,” he mumbled, and stepped forward. “I’m sorry, I… I didn’t know you… wanted…”

“Yeah, well…” Ellis trailed off. “I do.”

Gavin stepped forward. “C-congratulations,” he said, and stopped at Isaac’s side. “That’s… really, really great.” Isaac threw an arm over his shoulder. Gavin melted against Isaac, a little sigh making its way through his lips.

Sam pushed forward and wrapped their left arm around Finn’s waist, leaning their right shoulder gently against Ellis. They both wrapped Sam up in a gentle hug. They stepped back and stared back up at them, a wide smile across their face. Isaac didn’t think he’s seen them this happy since…

He couldn’t really remember.

“This family could use some good news,” Gray said gently, stepping forward to kiss Ellis on the top of their head. Ellis looked up at Gray with tears in their eyes as they gave Finn a kiss, too. “So…” They chuckled. “Really, really excellent work.”

“Well, we try,” Ellis said, flipping their hair over their shoulder.

Edrissa walked up and stood beside Gray. She looked up at Ellis, her hand extended out like she was about to touch Ellis’s belly. “This is… oh, Ellis, I… I can made all their clothes, if you want. There’s this nice store in Crayton that sells yarn and it’s… it’s been a while since I crocheted, and I’ll have to grab some patterns, but I can… Oh. I could start with a onsie… do you have any colors you really want? Does it… can you tell what sex it is? I heard sometimes you can tell…”

Ellis grinned down at her. “I think that might be a myth,” they said, smiling softly. Their hand settled over their belly. “I have no idea what it is. But…” They shrugged. “I like blue. No matter what, the baby can wear blue.”

“The baby can wear anything you want,” Edrissa sighed, looking like she was floating on air.

Isaac wondered if she ever imagined she would be this happy again.

Gavin pressed a soft kiss to Isaac’s cheek. Isaac blushed and turned to him. Gavin’s smile made something in him ache. He wet his lips.

“You hungry?” Gavin murmured.

“Yeah, actually,” Isaac said, smiling.

“I have sandwiches in the fridge, if you want,” Gavin said with a shrug. “I wasn’t sure what you wanted, so I made my, um… my favorite.” Gavin glanced at the floor.

“Sounds great,” Isaac said, his mouth watering.

“And then…” Gavin leaned in closer, his lips inches from Isaac’s ear. “After we eat, I want to talk to you,” he whispered, and the sound didn’t carry in the happy, busy kitchen.

Isaac pulled back and stared at Gavin, at the slip of a smile on his face, at the way his eyes seemed to burn from within. Isaac’s stomach flipped in anticipation of whatever… talking meant.

“Y-yeah,” he croaked, and cleared his throat. “Sounds, um… sounds good.”

Continued here

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whump-tr0pes · 4 years

Text

Honor Bound 4 - 17

This is a series. Start here, continued from here.

This is a sequel to Honor Bound, Honor Bound 2, Honor Bound 3.

AO3

Cw: self-hatred, death of parent, mention of narcotics

As they reached the house again, Isaac helped balance Sam as they stepped out of their shoes. He kicked off his boots and turned to walk into the kitchen. Sam caught his hand and pulled him back against them.

“Thank you,” they said softly, and wrapped their left around his waist. They laid their head against Isaac’s chest and squeezed him gently.

“For what?” Isaac’s voice shook as he moved to wrap his arms around them, then thought better of it and just pressed a kiss into their hair instead.

“For, um, for telling me.” Sam pulled away and met his gaze. “I know that wasn’t, um, easy.”

Isaac huffed out a laugh. “No,” he murmured. “It wasn’t. But… thank you for listening.”

“Of course, Isaac,” Sam said, and gave a rueful smile. “You’re my big brother. And if he makes you happy… and…” Sam wet their lips. “He’s good. He’s ours. And it… makes sense.” Sam’s stomach growled loudly.

Isaac lifted an eyebrow. “I’ll have to ask you what that means after you’ve eaten.” He took another step towards the kitchen. “Come on.” Sam smiled and followed behind.

As he moved further into the house, the smell of breakfast washed over Isaac. Gavin was right. I love Sunday breakfast, too.

He came around the corner to find the whole family, even Edrissa, in the kitchen. Tori and Vera sat on the barstools, Vera’s eyes fixed on Tori, her eyebrows pulled together, her mouth in a hard line. Gray, Finn, Ellis, and Edrissa were cooking breakfast. Gavin was setting the table in the front room.

Isaac smiled. “Need any help?” he said.

“Nope,” Ellis said as they flipped over some bacon, sizzling and popping in the pan, cooking over a stove that was twice as big as the one at the house in Crayton. “Almost done, actually. Can you take the plate of eggs in? The bacon’s almost done, too.”

“Sam, how about you sit down?” Isaac said gently. Sam nodded, sweat just breaking out over their skin as they bit their lip. Isaac’s stomach twisted. “Sam?”

“Sometimes the pain just flares up,” they panted, and held their arm tight to their side. “I d-don’t know why. I’ll be, be fine—”

“Do you want to just go lay down?” Isaac said, drifting to their side as if pulled there. “I can—”

“No, it’s okay,” Sam breathed. They walked slowly into the front room and sat down heavily in one of the chairs around the table. They leaned against the table and squeezed their eyes shut.

“Hey, dumbass.” Isaac turned to see Ellis holding out a huge plate stacked high with scrambled eggs. “Sooner you get the table ready, sooner Sam can eat.”

“R-right,” Isaac mumbled, and turned towards the front room.

As he walked in, Gavin walked past him and smiled shyly. His fingers brushed Isaac’s arm as he did. Isaac blushed and set the plate on the table.

“I refuse to live with you two if you continue that,” Ellis spat over their shoulder as they followed Isaac in, carrying a huge plate of bacon. Their voice was softer somehow than Isaac expected. He met their gaze, and they rolled their eyes… playfully. Isaac’s shoulders relaxed.

Isaac walked past them back into the kitchen, and was met with a steady stream of the family into the living room carrying plates of toast, containers of butter, salt and pepper shakers. Last in line was Gray.

“That’s it,” Gray said softly, squeezing Isaac’s shoulder with their free hand. Their other held a bottle of hot sauce.

Isaac smiled weakly. “Got the most important part,” he said.

Gray smiled back. “Absolutely I do.” They paused. Isaac’s shoulders tensed. “How did Sam…?”

“They took it well,” Isaac said, and glanced at the floor. “I mean… not like Ellis did, at least. I think they’re… um… hurt.”

Gray shrugged. “All things considered, I think they have a right to be.”

Isaac’s heart sank. “Y-yeah,” he mumbled.

Gray ducked into his field of vision. “But so do you. And you found a way to accept him.”

“I found a way to love him,” Isaac breathed.

Gray leaned back. A smile played at their lips.

Isaac tilted his head. “Did you really bet Finn on us being… um…?”

Gray snorted and rolled their eyes. “They made it too easy. Of course I did.”

Isaac swallowed the lump in his throat. “Then… when…?”

Gray laughed. “Before you left on the mission.”

Isaac’s jaw dropped. “Are you… are you… serious? Why didn’t you say anything? Why… you knew?”

“It wasn’t my place to… insert myself.” Gray’s lips quirked into a smile. “This was your thing to figure out. If I pointed it out, it might not have happened.”

“Did you want it to happen?” Isaac stared at Gray in bewilderment.

Gray’s smile fell a little, and they squeezed Isaac’s shoulder again. “I want you to be happy, Isaac,” they said softly, sadly. “Whatever form that takes. God knows you… you’ve suffered enough.”

Not enough to atone for what I did to Sam.

Isaac groaned and buried his face in his hands.

Gray rubbed Isaac’s shoulder, their hand stopping just above the cuts on Isaac’s arms that showed below his short sleeve. I never used to wear short sleeves.

“It… it kills me to see you fall into that,” Gray said gently.

“Into what?” Isaac mumbled through his hands.

“Into your self-loathing. Self-hatred. You have suffered more than any human should have to suffer and you still… you still think you deserve it. For whatever sins you think you’ve committed. Isaac…” Gray’s hand closed gently around Isaac’s wrist, over the stitches and the cuts that were just starting to heal after the last time Isaac tore them open. They slowly pulled his hand down away from his face. He looked up at them, fighting the burn behind his eyes. “There’s nothing you do, nothing you have done, that would deserve what you’ve been through. Not even close. So when I say, you deserve to be happy, and this thing you have with Gavin is a good source of that happiness…” They pressed their lips into a line. “…I mean it.”

Isaac’s mouth twisted into an attempt of a smile as he blinked back his tears. “Thanks, Gray. I don’t know what this is with Gavin. I just know that I…” He shrugged and let out a breath. “I don’t know.”

“You have the time and safety to do that here,” Gray said gently. “We’re miles away from the nearest person. With the supplies I get from Crayton, we can live here indefinitely. No one on earth but us knows Gavin is alive, except for us. We—”

“Two others,” Isaac said quickly. “Topher and Lucy. They helped us when Sam needed surgery.”

Gray paused. They slowly closed their mouth. After a moment, they dragged in a breath. “Oh. Well…” They shrugged. “You’re safe here. You can heal, figure it out…” Gray smiled again. “No matter how that works out.”

Isaac huffed out a half-laugh. “Thanks. I—”

“Will you stop with whatever angsty-ass conversation you’re having and get your asses in here?” Ellis called from the other room. “We’re hungry!”

Isaac laughed, louder than he meant to. “Coming,” he called back. He turned back to Gray. “Thanks for having this angsty-ass conversation with me,” he said with a grin.

“Any time,” Gray said, and walked towards the living room. “We have the time, now.”

∴

As Gray and Isaac walked into the living room, Gavin’s heart lifted. He knew, of all people, Gray would accept them, Isaac and him, together. Not just tolerate them, but… but accept them. Gray, of all people, wanted Gavin to be happy. And Gavin was happy with Isaac.

As soon as they both sat down, Isaac at Gavin’s side, and Gray at the head of the table, everyone fell on the food. Gavin loaded his plate with eggs and bacon, grabbed a slab of butter and spread it thick over a slice of toast. He covered his eggs with hot sauce. He lifted the first bite to his lips and savored them, the first good, hot food since he—

He pushed down that thought with a shudder. Since he left his mother’s house, with the gourmet chef in the kitchen and the finest ingredients that could be found in the region, all served hot and on time.

He’d rather eat nothing at all than have remained at his mother’s house a moment longer. He looked around at the others, all digging into the food, each and every one his family. All sitting together in this house, still cool from nighttime but somehow warm and full of light. His heart swelled in his chest, and he sighed.

Isaac smiled at him and reached over to squeeze Gavin’s knee under the table. Gavin’s skin tingled under Isaac’s hand.

A gasp. “I knew it.”

Gavin’s head snapped up and he looked at Edrissa, who was staring back at them both, a look of horror and confirmation on her face. Gavin paled and swallowed hard.

“Oh, geez,” Isaac whispered under his breath.

“I… I knew it,” Edrissa breathed in disbelief, her eyes darting between the two of them.

“Um… y-yeah, Edrissa,” Isaac said, his voice shaking. “We…”

“Wait,” Gavin said, his eyebrows pulling together. “How did you know?”

“With…” Edrissa swallowed as she stared at both of them. “With… the bounty hunters. When you… well, earlier, when you—” She thrust her chin at Gavin. “—were in the basement of that safehouse and… and you…” She thrust her chin at Isaac. “…and…” She licked her lips as she looked at them. “I… I just didn’t think…”

“With the bounty hunters?” Gavin said in disbelief. He glanced at Isaac. Isaac’s eyes were wide and stared right back at him. “You knew… then? I didn’t even know then.”

Edrissa’s eyebrows pulled together and her mouth twisted. “Then… then you’re stupid,” she said.

Gavin fell back in his chair. “Well… yeah. I am.”

Edrissa held Gavin’s gaze for a second more, then turned back to her food with a curt nod. Everyone around the table seemed to be holding their breath.

“Well,” Gray said delicately. “Points to Edrissa for noticing first.”

Isaac burst out laughing, the sound tight and strained but still warm. Still Isaac.

Then tension broke as everyone else burst into peals of laughter.

Ellis rocked forward, tears in their eyes as they heaved with laughter. “You… you are… such a fucking dumbass…” They gasped for breath and held their stomach. “Edrissa is queen for saying it.” They awkwardly held out their hand to Edrissa. Edrissa flinched back, staring at the hand for a moment, suspicion moving through her face. Then she raised her hand and slapped it against Ellis’s. She smiled as Ellis leaned back and sobbed with laughter.

Gavin felt the weight on his shoulders lift, just a little. He turned back to his plate with a shy smile and took a bite of a crispy piece of bacon.

Even when my mom had all the fucking resources in the world, she somehow didn’t get bacon this good.

A stab of something dark and awful shot through him. Something like grief. Something like loss. I shouldn’t fucking miss her.

But he missed his father still, and mourned for him all those months ago when he was killed. Killed by the woman sitting across the table, eating a piece of toast as she looked at Tori, sitting quiet and reserved in her chair.

The table fell into a different sort of silence. Comfortable. The only sounds were crunching bacon and the clink of silverware against plates. Gavin swam in the silence, his eyes threatening tears. This is what it could have been like, to have a family.

I can have that family now. He looked over at Isaac, and blushed when he found Isaac staring right back at him.

Gray cleared their throat. “I wanted to stay at the house as long as possible when you first showed up, to make sure everyone’s settled down properly. But with you staying with me, I’m going to need more supplies. Food, obviously, toiletries, and some medical supplies as well.” They looked at Finn. “If you could provide me with a list…”

“Absolutely,” Finn said excitedly. “What can you expect to find? I’d really love saline, more IV kits, and… and any narcs you can get your hands on, we have less than I would like…”

“I’m given to understand that Crayton can provide us with ample amounts of ‘the basics’, whatever that means,” Gray said with a smile. “Like I said, make a list and I’ll see what I can do. Edrissa, would you like to come with me?”

Edrissa smiled and nodded. “Yes. I… there’s a store I want to go to. They have, um, they have these really pretty threads and I was thinking I could… maybe… get some more fabric?” She glanced around the table. “Practice making clothes? I could make a, a scarf, maybe a shirt, or…” She glanced at Sam. “Maybe I could make you a nicer sling,” she said. Her cheeks reddened. Gavin’s eyebrows went up, bewildered.

“Um, yeah,” Sam said softly. “That sounds, um, really nice.” They offered a shy smile to Edrissa.

Gray turned to Vera. “Vera, would you mind coming with us?” They dipped their head. “I wouldn’t ask, especially not so soon after you getting back, but… having someone with us with experience in… tactical solutions might be prudent.” They shrugged. “From what I understand, things have been a little chaotic in Crayton since the…” Gray glanced at Gavin. “…Stormbeck overthrow.”

“Of course,” Vera murmured, and gently squeezed Tori’s shoulders. Tori leaned into the touch.

“And when we get back,” Edrissa piped up, “Can we…” She bit her lip and looked at Vera. “I want to… um… learn to fight. Like you. Not, it doesn’t have to be today, but…” She shrugged, and the motion was a little tight. “I want to be like you,” she said softly.

Vera sat up a little taller in her seat as her mouth fell slightly open. “Um… yeah.” She grinned. “There’s a barn out back, it would be perfect for practicing. Out of the way. Maybe we can…” She glanced at the table, thinking. “We could try to find some mats. Maybe a fake knife. That could be…” She glanced at Isaac. “Isaac could help. He’s great to practice with, knows a lot of stuff I don’t—”

“No thank you,” Edrissa said in a rush. “I…” Her face darkened. “I don’t want—”

“That’s okay,” Isaac said quietly. “I don’t have to touch you. Or even help. Not if you don’t want.”

Gavin had seen the fear in Edrissa sometimes when Isaac got too close. He’d seen how she backed up when he walked past, how she went perfectly still sometimes when he looked at her. Guilt burned in his stomach, old and so, so familiar. That’s because of people like me, he thought bitterly.

Edrissa looked back to Vera. “Just you,” she said softly. “I… I just want it to be with you.”

Vera dipped her head. “Absolutely,” she said, the excitement still running through her every movement. “I still remember some drills. I’d be happy to help.”

“Thanks,” Edrissa said, her voice fading. She shot a glance at Gavin. A shadow of a smile passed over her face.

Continued here

#honor bound 4 #angst #recovery #Isaac/Gavin #Isaac and Sam #breakfast #Sunday breakfast #gunshot wounds #Gray: mom friend #self-hatred tw #ellis is always having a high-feelings day #edrissa: mystery girl #death of parent tw #narcotics mention tw #sam/edrissa #my oc: Isaac

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whump-tr0pes · 4 years

Text

Sneak peek for Honor Bound 4-18

y’all, I am physically dying sitting on these chapters but I gotta for a little while, for whumptober planning purposes.

but until then...

Cw: PTSD, conditioned whumpee, flashback

I wonder how much of that is time away from Gavin. Gray pushed the thought out of their head.

“It’s alright, Edrissa,” Gray said gently, never taking their eyes off the road. “I’m not hurt. I’m not angry. It’s just a mistake, right? Mistakes are alright.”

“Mm-hm,” Edrissa said uncertainly. She relaxed slightly.

“Remember your counting?” Gray said, low and calm.

Edrissa jerked her head in a nod. She took in a deep breath. “One two three four five,” she muttered, and shook out her hands at the wrists with each number.

#sneak peek #edrissa: mystery girl #Gray: mom friend #ptsd tw #flashbacks tw

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whump-tr0pes · 4 years

Text

Ryan Reveal part 1/2

Honor Bound 2 - 23 (grief/mourning) @badthingshappenbingo (requested by anon)

Red X is for posted, white X is for requested.

This is a series. Start here, continued from here.

This is a sequel series to Honor Bound.

AO3

Ryan Reveal Part 1/2

Cw: discussion of death of sibling

Tori’s hand closed around the doorknob and she paused for a moment. Once I open this door, I can’t undo what happens. I can’t unknow what I learn. And I can’t take back what I say. She squeezed her eyes shut and pushed it open.

Gray was lying on the couch with Finn hovering beside them, wringing their hands, checking Gray’s wound every few seconds. Gray gently pushed Finn away as they saw Tori walk in and sat themselves up a little, wincing as they did. Tori’s eyes flicked to Sam and Isaac in the kitchen. They both turned when they heard her walk in. No one else was in the front room.

She licked her lips. “Where’s Edrissa?”

A flicker of fear passed over Isaac’s face. “In her room. Why?”

Tori set her jaw. “I need to talk to her.”

The temperature in the room seemed to drop.

Isaac carefully made his way out of the kitchen to stand in front of Tori. He pitched his voice low. “What is it? Is she…?” His throat worked. “Is she…?”

Tori’s eyes narrowed as she realized what Isaac was asking. “She’s not syndicate,” she said under her breath. “No. She’s not a spy or anything. I just…” She bit her lip and looked around at the others. All their eyes were on her. “I went to talk to Daniel Schiester. To smooth things over and give him our information.” Her jaw jutted forward. “Turns out he’s the mayor here. Seems to enjoy quite a bit of control.” She pushed down a flare of frustration. “Anyway, I got us registered with their town hall and um… someone recognized Edrissa in the square. He didn’t say anything while we were all there, but he found me and asked me about her. I just… have some questions. I need to talk to her.”

“Do you mind doing it in here, where we can hear?” Isaac’s face was tense with suspicion.

Tori shook her head. “Not at all. I’ll get her.”

She made her way down the hall further into the house.

It was a sprawling ranch-style house with plenty of bedrooms for them. It bore the marks of heavy traffic; scuffs marked the walls and doorways, the aging carpet was bare in some places, and there was more than one mural scribbled on the paint where a young child had decided to express their creativity. It made Tori smile.

Her face fell again as she reached Edrissa’s door. Her heart clenched and she raised her hand to knock.

She heard rustling behind the door and soft footsteps. The lock turned and the door opened. Edrissa looked out at Tori with wary eyes.

“Hey, honey,” Tori said gently. “I want to talk to you about something. Can you come out to the living room?”

Edrissa immediately went pale and cringed behind the door. Her eyes flicked past Tori once, twice, calculating how far she could make it before she got caught. Tori put her hands up and stepped away from the door.

“Hey. You’re not in trouble. I just need to talk to you. Okay? You’re not in trouble. We’re not…” The words died on her lips. “We’re not going to hurt you.”

Edrissa swallowed loudly and wrapped her arms around herself. Tori turned and walked to the living room. Edrissa followed along behind, her head bowed like she was walking to her execution.

Everyone turned when they heard Tori walk back in. She went to an empty couch and sat, placing her hand on the cushion next to her. Edrissa’s eyes moved warily over everyone as she sat down, huddled on the edge of the couch, as far away from everyone as she could possibly be.

Tori looked around at the others and cleared her throat. She took a deep breath and looked squarely at Edrissa. “Edrissa, honey, you told the bounty hunters your name was Edrissa Worthington.”

Edrissa’s eyes went wide and she shot up on the couch, bracing as if to run. Isaac flinched and his hand went unconsciously to his waistband. To his gun. It wasn’t there. Edrissa sank miserably back to the cushions.

“Hey, sweetie, I told you you’re not in trouble,” Tori said soothingly. “Okay? We just want to know. Worthington isn’t actually your name, is it?”

Edrissa’s eyes were huge and filled with tears. She trembled as she pulled her arms tighter around herself, eyes darting to each person in the room in turn. Her breathing was fast and shallow and a tear rolled down her cheek. “Um…”

“It’s alright, honey,” Tori murmured, her voice low and steady, like she was talking to a frightened animal in a cage. “We aren’t going to hurt you. We just need to know.”

Edrissa’s breath caught in a sob. Her eyes finally rested on Isaac in a look that said he’ll be the one to hurt me. Have to watch him. “No,” she whispered.

Tori held her face and voice perfectly neutral, the way she’d done with her family when they’d all arrived on her doorstep months ago, broken in varying degrees. “Okay. What’s your real name? Can you tell us?”

Edrissa stared at Isaac. “I…” She shook her head. “I don’t have that name anymore… I’m… I’m nameless. I’m a plaything. I’m… I’m nothing…”

Tori couldn’t conceal the tremor in her voice. “Oh.” She licked her lips. “No, Edrissa. You’ll never be that again. You’re here with us, now. Free. You don’t belong to us. What was the name you had before?” Her gaze flicked to Isaac and she stared at him, silently urging him to back down. He shrank back. Let his hands fall subtly at his sides, open. Empty. He looked at the floor.

“Please…” Edrissa whimpered. “Please, I don’t want to get in trouble.” She was crying now, openly, with tears rolling down her cheeks and into her lap.

Tori pushed down the urge to go to her and pull her into an embrace. She pushed down her own tears and tried again. “Edrissa… I might have news about your brother.”

Edrissa’s eyebrows shut up and her mouth fell open. Her arms unwound from her chest and she leaned forward, gripping the cushions. “Micah?” she breathed.

Tori’s heart sank. She folded her hands on her lap. “Edrissa, I need to know your last name.”

“Clark,” she said, nearly tripping over the word. “My name is Edrissa Clark. Is Micah alive? Did he, did he make it? Is he alive?”

Tori looked at the ceiling, trying to keep the tears brimming in her own eyes from falling. “No, honey. Um…” She pushed a slow breath between her lips. “Micah was killed.”

Edrissa collapsed. It looked like the core of her had shattered, and there was nothing holding her up now. She dissolved into sobs, pressing her hands against her mouth, bending forward at the waist until her forehead nearly pressed against the cushions.

“No,” she moaned, and her voice broke. “No… Micah… no…” She dragged in a shuddering gasp and wailed, a terrible keening sound that tore at Tori’s heart.

Tori pressed a hand to her lips and tried to force her tears down. “I’m so sorry, honey,” she whispered. She cleared her throat. “I’m so sorry. Someone in the crowd thought you looked familiar –”

“Micah –”

“—and he knew your brother several years ago –”

“—no –”

“—when he saw you he thought he knew who you were –”

“—please –”

“—but he wasn’t sure –”

Edrissa’s breaths were coming too fast. Her eyes were wide and she braced herself up on the couch, gasping for air. Tori reached out and pulled her close.

The girl didn’t stop her horrible wailing that dug claws into Tori’s heart. She slumped in Tori’s arms, weeping, and curled her fingers into Tori’s shirt.

“…he asked me if your name was Clark when I was at the town hall.” Tori raised her voice over Edrissa’s cries and pressed her lips into her hair. “He knew a Micah Clark who looked like you, and I thought I remembered Gray telling me your brother’s name…” She glanced at Gray and they nodded. Tears shone in their eyes, too.

“Micah…”

“She said he was, um. Shot. When she was taken,” Gray mumbled. Edrissa shuddered against Tori and cried harder.

“He, um, succumbed to his wounds,” Tori said miserably. “I’m so sorry, honey. I wish –” I wish what? I wish your brother was alive? I wish you hadn’t been taken? I wish you hadn’t been tortured as a plaything for two years? Tori pressed her cheek against the top of Edrissa’s head. Tori’s tears fell into her hair.

Edrissa struggled and pulled herself out of Tori’s grasp. She dashed for her room, her hand pressed over her mouth, still sobbing her brother’s name. She nearly collided with Vera as Vera stumbled into the living room.

Tori’s head hung low as tears ran down her nose. “Fuck,” she whispered. “That poor girl… she had nothing but the… but the hope that her brother was still alive, and now she –” Tori cut herself off at the sound of a strangled sob. Her head snapped up. Her heart sank as she saw Vera standing in the doorway of the living room, her hand thrust out against a wall. Her other hand was pressed against her chest. Her eyes were faraway, staring at something only she could see. Tears were streaming down her face.

Tori was up in an instant. “Babe. What’s wrong?” She crossed to Vera and stopped a few feet away from her, hands outstretched, helpless. “Vera? Are you there again? What is it? You can speak.” Tori nearly babbled with panic.

“I…” Vera convulsed forward as another sob wracked her body. She slid down onto her knees and screamed in horror at what was playing out in front of her eyes, in her mind. “I remember. I remember what Ryan did. I remember what happened to Ryan.”

Read part 2 here

#honor bound 2 #bad things happen bingo #grief/mourning #whump #on the run #death tw #death of a sibling tw #isaac's PTSD #past torture #edrissa: mystery girl #the Ryan Reveal #part 1 #sorry peeps #also i have no regrets #also this was the plan almost from the beginning so...#my oc: Tori

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