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#el: I dump ur ass
knownoshamc · 2 years
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when your love interest vs when your friend break ups with you. which one is which?
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esxvspy · 1 year
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Just something that I’ve noticed, but why is it that whenever I look at the anti byler or anti mileven page (they both make me giggle tbh) that people don’t seem to care about mikes feelings in these relationships?? Like usually it’s like “oh but if byler happens El will be sad” or “if mileven stays together will would be miserable” but what about what mike thinks? That’s bc we don’t know what he thinks. The duffers have been purposely ambiguous as to what mike is feeling towards both of them. The way he couldnt say ily to el during their fight? I mean she was basically begging. I mean he couldn’t even say ily to her through a store bought card. A STORE BOUGHT CARD
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BRO WENT OUT OF HIS EAY TO GET ONE THAT SAYS “I LIKE YOU” ON IT. Also literally the whole monologue was so easily debunkable. He didn’t fall in love with her when he first met her, he let her stay in his house for one night and then was planning on sending her back to, and I quote, “pennhurst or wherever she comes from.” That doesn’t sound like love. Plus everything in season 3?? With the “I dump ur ass”?? Not doing anything about it?? El kissing him in front of an open closet?? Like from this standpoint it seems fairly obvious that he’s NOT in love with el, at least not anymore. However, on the other hand, everyone on the cast has been super hush hush about byler as well. No serious talk ab it in interviews, just casual “wait and see”s. Like we know will is in love with mike but mike might not feel the same?? It’s definitely plausible with all the theories I see (and btw I’m all for these theories I eat them up) but even with all the heart to hearts we rarely see mikes perspective. The only time I think we do get his pov is on the upside down couch in the finale. In which mike is seeing will bathed in light. And the blocking for the finale with will and mike paired together?? Plus the lighting, they really play with lighting. Overall mileven is based on hard canon and byler is more up to subtext. Both are fairly obvious though. The only thing we rarely see in both of these ships is MIKES PERSPECTIVE. It’s always from wills or els, it’s almost never mikes. And the duffers have to be doing it for a reason, like it’ll make one more obvious then the other. So that could be why people who are so anti mileven/byler could be using so little of mike in their arguments, bc there’s nothing to work with. We DONT know what he wants. Hell he’s still figuring that out himself. Give Mike wheeler a break and let him figure out what he wants! (I hope this was coherent bc I am tired and it is 11pm and I was mostly just rambling)
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buckieduckie · 1 year
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why i thought michael wheeler was gay before i even knew what stranger things was about - why i decided to watch ST in the first place
ok ok ok so yes i know this sounds crazy and insane and impossoble even. i mean you have to watch a show to know if the characters are gay, right? wrong.
But how'd you even know who mike was before you watched ST?
becauuuseee honeyyyy, ur a kid on the internet, you watch videos on youtube, lots of those will unfortunately be top 10 videos cause ur like 10 or 11 or sum shit. anyways, you see clips from popular shows and medias. some of those are stranger things clips and you get half way familiar with the characters so you know who millie bobby brown is and you know what mikes face looks like.
anyways, this brings me to my next... statement? point? anyways... so yeah, i cant remember what video i was watching or anything, but a clip from stranger things comes up. i knew it was ST cause it was popular and shit n duhhhh. ANYWAYS the clip was El Dumping Mike's Ass ™ and, i cant remember if it was the clip saying it or my own gaydar going off, but i think it was my gaydar, BUT i imeditately clocked mike as gay. i was what.... 6th grade? maybe? at the most.
anyways, i watched mike getting dumped and somehow, someway, i just knew. i just imediately knew. and yknow... part of me thinks it was just the fact that back then because i hadnt watched the show, i was comepletely utterly totally unbiased. like my slate was clean. i knew nothing of anything besides that clip. maybe it is more obvious than we think....
after that i just kinda forgot about it for a couple years untilllll....
OK so then... On to my next point of disgussion.
Why did I start watching Stranger Things?
OK OK OK OK OK SO- okkayy saurrrrrrrrr basically, i have a friend. her name is tina. (thats her nickname ok dw im not like leaking personal info chill) anyways. she sat with me in art last year, and i knew from sitting with her that year and knowing her in the previous years that she was a really big fan of stranger things. sooooooo yeah i sat with her in art and i guess she knew that i hadnt watched stranger things, so like... she realllllyyyyyy wanted me to watch stranger things she was like "omg you should totally watch stranger things youd like it so much theyre coming out with a new season this summer im so excited" so i was like omggggg but yk shes always trying to make me watch shit n ykyk, whatever.
one day she convinces me or- wait no i think she forced me, and i kinda like- caved or smt. anyways, we end up watching the first episode on her phone during art class. lmao slay. so we finish the first episode and im thinking it was really good like wow but my ass probably wont watch the second episode cause im terrible at getting commited like wow
and ok- so herereeeee, here comes the kicker- the slingshot into ST. like why i actually like continued to watch.
i was still in my h<3rt stopper (censoring cause it would be annoying if this was in their tag) hyperfixation, or more like i was just getting out of my HS hyperfixation. I watched the series 3 times so i was getting a bit burnt out, so i needed something else to fan over, something else to watch. but not anything, it had to be gay. because lord KNOWS we do NOT have enough gay shit to watch. like i need it. and- im sorry- but not crappy indie films (disclaimer- indie films are NOT all crappy, theres just... some .... iykyk💀) or weird.... weird ones that make no sense and are just there for like... sex and honestly i have no fucking clue.
no i needed GAYURIJRH anyways,,,,, so i dm Tina and im like "omg tinaaaa helllpp meeee 👹 i need gay stuff to watch theres no good ones 😭" and so she gives me a list of shows with gay characters in them, and then shes like "Will from Stranger Things is gay lmao" (pre season 4 btw) so im like, in my mind, im like "Cool 😃 Mike Wheeler from Stranger Things is gay 😃" no duckiebuckie she said will- "Mike Wheelr is gay 😃" *queue past memories and preconceived notions of the past now flodding forward*
so. i waited a couple days. then i watched the first episode again this time with my little brother and like the rest of season 1 (not all at once) and i, fully, utterly, comepletely, totally, full heartedly believed that Mike was gay (i mean he is but thats not the point right now) like- i just, believed it. i just simply took it as fact. literally no one ever actually told me Mike was gay. i had just like, thought it was canon. like i actually thought it was canon. like genuinley. its so fucking funny thinking about it now because i really actually dont think i ever saw anyone or anything actually stating Mike was gay or anything, like my own seld really had made it canon. like wow. icon. again, it couldve been that one video, but i kinda like also dont. YKWWWW- I LIKE- ok so i even went to the point of like, during or after watching the first episode, imagining a little coming out scenario LATER THAT SEASON with mike telling Dustin and Lucase (cant remember if- WAIT OH MY GODDDD I JUST REMEMBERED- WILL WASNT IN THE SENARIO I WAS IMAGINING BECAUSE MIKE WAS COMING OUT TO LUCAS AND DUSTIN AS GAY AND HE LIKED WILL- YALL I REALLY HAVE BEEN A BYLER SHIPPER SINCE THE BEGINNING HUH 🥹🥹 (btw i would like to mention that this was less of a head canon and more of a "oh this is probably gonna happen like this is whats happening" kinda thing LMFAOOOOOO
and then mike kissed el and i was like what the fuck 😟
and then from the end of season 1-4 v1 and v2 i was... convinced of the opposite 😔 💔 but HEY YOU CANT BLAME ME I WAS LIKE GA BACK THEN AND LIKE MIKE AND EL KISSED N SHIT WHAT WAS I SUPPOSED TO THINK
and then the byler heart to hearts started happening and i was like- oh wait- oh honey, mikey dear your gay is showing right now. LIKE I WAS A GA WHO THOUGHT MIKE WAS STRAIGHT AND I COULD STILLLL SEEEE THE FRUITINESS LIKE HONEEYYYYYYYYYYYY FRIENDS DONT TALK TO FRIENDS LIKE THAT but i digress.
anyways. then mike said i love you blah blah blah yk like yeah hes straight but i wasnt even really thinking about the subject that much
ANYWAYS what convinced me once again that mike wheeler was gay?
well, mainly @kaypeace21 's analysis about why they think mike is not Bi, but gay, yk, the iconic one. but what started inspection in the first place when i was a steadfast "wills 100% gay but unfortunately mike is 100% straight and its unrequited and i dont ship byler because its just a lil funky and weird because mike is OBVIOUSLY straight blah blah blah i mean its cute but its dEFINITELY not real blah blah" believer? because.... of ONE fateful tiktok.
Enter Tina again. were at her house, and we decide to watch stranger things tiktok compilations and crack videos n stuff cause yk that stuff is really funny and great.
So we see this one tiktok compilation and its stranger thins ofc and the title says (very gay) and shes like, ya wanna watch this one? and im like (my ass had already seen this same complilation, but i remembered the greatness that it held) so i agree.
so previously, i had watched the video and just kinda ignored the byler stuff cause i didnt ship (although i would like to make a disclaimer that i was not a mileven shipper either. i kinda just thought they were like cute and yk oh theyre the main couple cool ig it is what it is like this is how its gonna be ig) anyways, but this time (i think we had like briefly discussed mikes sexuality earlier, and decided he was prolly definitely just straight (but discussing it in the first place is like, kinda telling lmfao)) so it was on my mind. so this time, when the byler vid came on, i payed more attention. it was a rink o mania edit. and i saw his facial expression. i saw that fucking facial expression.
so me and Tina™ paused the video, and we were like "ok... so like, I think Mike is straight... but like that facial expression he just made. but like hes definitely straight right? yeah... but that expressionnnnnnn.... but like yeah, right? yeah.. anyways...." and then we watched the rest of the video.
and then pinterest came in and it was one piece of evidence after another and then the Kaypeace post.
the rest is history.
My Point?
The whole reason I started watching Stranger Things in the first place was because I thought Mike was gay. If Mike Wheeler is not gay, I will have watched Stranger Things for nothing. yes, i stayed and kept watching even after m*l*v*n was established because stranger things is just so good, how could you not? but my point still stands. The whole reason for me even deciding to keep watching after the first episode was because i thought mike was gay. and it seems that we've come full circle now, because once again, i believe mike wheeler is gay and my enjoyment (and ST) depends on Mike being gay.
tagging @aemiron-main because like idk i feel like you would find this interesting? amusing? maybe? lol
tagging @l0v3c0r3e @adorewillbyers cause i feel like yall would get it 🥺 also i need someone to read this shit because i did not just spend an hour and a half writing this for like 0 notes like no maaaaaaaaaaam
@the-homosphere cause they dared me to
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elekinetic · 1 year
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Hello!!! What’s the thing you want to see happen, above all other things, in season 5? If you’re bored enough, I won’t object to your top three or top five things!
oooh i like this question!!
ok so blah blah obv byler endgame etc etc OK MOVING ON
i have a whole note in my phone titled s-5 wishlist. here are some highlights:
el dumping mike (i have a very specific way i would like this to go down but i will settle for "i dump ur ass (part 2)"
everyone getting tormented with Vecna Visions at the same time (i am happy to expand on what i mean by this)
a swift and sensical resolution to the us&russian govt plotline. emphasis on swift.
lucas protecting erica
return of scott clark
stonathan scenes
UD version of hopper's cabin
robin fighting a monster. freaking tf out and maybe just screaming while stabbing something. played for comedy but not super light hearted.
ok so more than five but !!! there is my wishlist. i have more but i will cut myself off there.
ask me anything!
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nobigdealcy · 2 years
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au where will joined el and max on their shopping spree and they became besties. like lets say will is so done listening to his friend’s girl problems and just bikes away, running into el, who is on her way to max’s place. will’s like ‘oh btw mike lied to you :|’ and el goes ‘i suspected :/’
max is lowkey confused why will is here too but quickly moves on bc she acknowledges that there are now 2 people she needs to train in having their own style and not depending on their family and squad to pick for them.
will not knowing how to let go of his flannels so max works around it like ‘what if you just,, tied it around ur waist’ cause that hand-me-down from jonathan looks astrocious and drags him through several shirts to get what he likes. he eventually picks out something in a soft yellow color and it matches one of the shirts el picked out. idk just will liking all the colors and getting one of each. also he def gets a haircut so he looks like a mini jonthan with a bit of longer hair that he ties back, which he’s lowkey worried for his moms reaction but joyce is cool with it as long as he likes it.
in the photos part he enjoys himself SO much cause the camera guy was really sweet and supportive about ‘wear whatever you like!!’ and he will cherish those pics forever like never leaves home without a pic in his pocket or bag.
he’s kinda worried about the person who got their drink blown up by el but el and max r like ‘its fine they were bitches!!’ + he doesnt do the ice cream switch w them cause he liked his too much
mike n lucas r looking to him for support when el and max dump their asses but he’s just enjoying his ice cream and is happy to join the other two in the bus and giggle like little maniacs.
just will happy to be included and experiencing what normal teens experience. also he def gets them into dnd. its not like an official party bc he cant get himself to completely leave out his og group but yeah.
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sluttsxphobia · 2 years
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ᴡᴏᴜʟᴅ ᴛʜᴇʏ ᴄʜᴇᴀᴛ?
ғ.ᴡ ᴄʜᴀʀᴀᴄᴛᴇʀs.
𝑬𝒏𝒋𝒐𝒚
ғɪɴɴ✦
Hah.
No.
ᴍɪʟᴇs✦
No, never in his life will he do that.
Would probably kill you if you did don't leave him.
ʙᴏʀɪs✦
He would cheat if he got too high or drunk but he would never do it on purpose.
He was to intoxicated to realize it wasn't you, he apologized mid way into plowing the girl.
ᴛʀᴇᴠᴏʀ✦
No.
ᴛʏʟᴇʀ✦
Never. Not ever. Nope.
Loyal bubs.
ᴍɪᴋᴇ✦
With el-
He went back to her bc y'all had a fight.
Stupid mike
(I dUmP uR aSs)
Bichard-)Richie
Yeah but would regret it.
He was sucking face with some girl at a party and you saw him.
He tried to play the victim, but you don't play that shit.
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legitcookie · 1 year
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I posted 6,231 times in 2022
That's 6,231 more posts than 2021!
121 posts created (2%)
6,110 posts reblogged (98%)
Blogs I reblogged the most:
@neverswungonswingingstars
@blackbeardskneebrace
@knowlesian
@somecunttookmyurl
@snake-snack-stede
I tagged 4,069 of my posts in 2022
Only 35% of my posts had no tags
#stranger things - 1,298 posts
#ofmd - 716 posts
#steddie - 577 posts
#our flag means death - 322 posts
#queuety pie - 311 posts
#our flag means death - 310 posts
#lmao - 231 posts
#st ficlet - 184 posts
#eddie munson - 160 posts
#steve harrington - 153 posts
Longest Tag: 139 characters
#obviously so i can send them a quick lil ‘ur story ruined me thank you’ message but to also rb their posts abt it/rec their fics on my blog
My Top Posts in 2022:
#5
Still The One, pt 2
[Part 1] [Read on ao3]
The plan was in motion.
“Steve isn't here.” Robin was standing behind the counter at Family Video stacking tapes with not a voluminous mop of hair in sight. After going off to college two years ago, she still comes back and works a summer job here with Steve.
“But he said earlier he had to go to work!” Dustin all but shouted at her, raising his arms. “This screws with our plans!”
“What? Why? What do you need Dingus for?”
“For Operation SHEM!”
“Ok, I'm going to pretend to know what you're talking about,” Robin plastered her best customer service smile, nodding her head.
The Party sighed, exasperated that she wasn't immediately taking them seriously.
“It stands for Steve-Harrington-Eddie-Munson. We think they're breaking up,” explained Max.
Robin's eyebrows furrowed. “And why do you think they're breaking up exactly?”
Lucas, Dustin, Mike, and Will all turn to Max, Robin's eyes following. Max cleared her throat.
“I might have overheard them yelling this morning when I stopped by, and then Steve left saying he had to go to work, but see! He isn't here! Probably apartment hunting as we speak and is going to skip town in the middle of the night!” Max was staring at her, eyes wide, inviting her to debunk her seemingly airtight logic. Beat that, Buckley!
“Okay...I think you've been watching too many soaps with El lately, for starters. Steve did come in earlier. He forgot that we switched shifts so I could go on a d- out with Nancy later. So, it's not like he lied!”
“How did he seem? Was he crying? Were his eyes glassy from unshed tears?” Lucas asked, leaning forward on the counter, hands flat.
“You joined in watching the soaps too, huh? No! He was grumbling about something, but he would have told me if they were BREAKING UP! They're both big boys, guys. Whatever you heard, let them work through it themselves.”
“THANK YOU!” yelled Mike, “That's what I've been saying! The last time someone meddled in a relationship, my girlfriend dumped me!”
“Hell yeah, she did,” Max crosses her arms over her chest and shot him with a grin, “and rightfully so. You were being an ass.”
Mike groaned and rolled his eyes. “We were, like, 13! I didn't know shit then, and I don't know shit now! The only thing I DO know is to stay out of someone else's relationship!”
Dustin turned back towards Robin, mirroring Lucas' earlier pose and leaning on the counter.
“Ignore him. Where did he go? C'mon Robin! We go way back! Remember how much fun the Scoops Troop had?”
“You mean when we were locked in an elevator, and then Steve and I were tortured by Russians? Or when a giant, viscous monster made out of townspeople tried to level us?” She gave him a blank stare.
“The walk down the tunnel was nice,” Dustin grinned, showing all of his pearly whites.
Robin kept looking at him, then swept her eyes over all their faces. Her face remained unreadable as they all waited, giving their best We are so trustworthy and good at our jobs smile they could each muster.
“Nope,” Robin finally replied, popping the P. “I'm not going to enable you meddling with my best friend's love life. Big no from me. Go to the arcade or something to distract those brains of yours.”
Well. That was completely unhelpful. Phase 1 is quickly turning into a bust. Their next stop at Steve and Eddie's apartment to talk to Eddie is pointless too when no one answers their extensive and very loud knocks.
Maybe Mike was right. Maybe this was the universe or fate or whatever telling them to butt out for once in their lives.
What was she thinking? Fate was a heartless bitch who either killed or almost killed everyone in her life on more than one (or two, or three) occasions. Fuck fate. They'll fix this before it breaks apart entirely. They won't let them be dumbasses and ruin it. She could handle lovesick idiots, but she draws the line at seeing them mope and pine for each other again.
-------------------------------------
ROBIN has entered the chat.
See the full post
103 notes - Posted November 22, 2022
#4
Reasons I think Roach should've been picked for Blackbeard's crew:
Sews - own arm, flag
Violent (affectionate) - watermelon smash, knives of glee
Cooks - tapas, 40 orange glaze cake
Surgeon - see #1, Lucius basically did the same thing with his finger Roach was going to do
No Frenchie hate AT ALL, but I think an opportunity was missed for a quadruple threat js
122 notes - Posted June 14, 2022
#3
ok, but what if Freddie is played by Kayvan Novak
and the only physical difference is he's not a vampire and also wears glasses
and Nandor, not realizing the physical similarities because he hasn't looked at himself in a mirror properly in 700 years, is all "Guillermo, how did you land a guy like that?? He's so handsome. Look at his hair 👀"
and just everyone looks at the camera like
this fucking guy
128 notes - Posted July 29, 2022
#2
Still the One pt 1
[Read on ao3]
”Why do you have to make everything so fucking difficult, Eddie?”
Max's eyes widened, hand stopping just before making contact with the closed door to Steve and Eddie's apartment.
”Oh, I'm so sorry, your highness. Please keep telling me the same thing over and over again. I can't wait to hear if you put a new spin on it!”
“Quit the bullshit, I wouldn't have to keep telling you if you did it this century.”
This was not what Max had been expecting when she drove over that morning. She expected to knock on the door, be greeted by two lovesick buffoons that had recently moved in together, and grab the Dungeons & Dragons book Mike had left there. Apparently having a car made everyone think they could ask for favors. Well after this lovely start to the morning, that wasn't going to happen again any time soon.
She should leave. She definitely shouldn't press her ear to the door to hear better.
”Steve, I wanted to move in with my boyfriend, not my mom.”
“Well if you're so miserable, why did you? Do whatever you want, man, I'm going to work.”
Max launched herself away from the door and bolted to the corner of the hallway behind a large potted plant. She pulled her hood up and tried to be as inconspicuous as possible. Steve opened and closed the door forcefully, marching down the opposite side of the hallway, then out of sight. When the coast was clear, she went back to the door and put her ear on it. Inside, the only sound she could make out was the banging of cabinet doors and then pans clanging together. Max walked to the window facing the parking lot and saw Steve get in his car and drive away.
This was bad. She had seen more than her fair share of fights between her mom and dad, and then her mom and stepdad, to know when a breakup with inevitable. The repurcussions of this would be catastophic. Eddie and Steve were a package deal the last few years. After winning the fight with Vecna, Max and Eddie had extensive hospital stays, and with that came immense boredom.
Using the radios their friends left them, Max and Eddie started to talk more and more between their rooms.
Y'know what could have prevented those bat bites, genius?
Pray tell, Red.
Zipping up your damn jacket.
Hey, Red, why did the chicken cross the road?
Why?
There was a KFC on the other side.
Steve visited every day, usually with someone else like Dustin, Lucas, or Robin, but sometimes it was just him. Max saw them slowly fall for each other. It started out as dopey grins and joking with one another, then lingering touches and glancing at each other when they thought no one was paying attention. By the time they got their heads out of their asses, Max and Eddie had both been discharged (Max a few weeks after due to her entire body being in a damn cast). Now, two years later, she couldn't imagine it any other way. She couldn't imagine them being just Steve and just Eddie.
When Max turned 16 and got her driver's license, Eddie immediately helped her find a clunky, old car she could use since skateboarding wasn't as easy as it used to be, much to the complaints of the rest of the party for the special treatment. It's her consolation prize for putting up with you gremlins for years. Eddie and Steve both helped her work on the car, taking turns (Steve was more enthusiatic, but Eddie knew a bit more since he had worked on his van) getting it running smoothly.
No. This wouldn't happen, not on her watch.
She immediately bolted down the stairs as quickly as she could, hopped in her car, and probably broke some traffic laws to get to Mike's house.
Max could hear the boys arguing from the other side of the door leading directly to the basement. After walking in, they still continued, not acknowledging the additional person.
“I'm just saying, why can't we just-”
“Hey, guys. I just left-” Max tried to interrupt to no avail.
“Because it doesn't make ANY SENSE!” Dustin ended with a yell, throwing his hands in the air.
“Guys.” Nothing.
“It would make sense if you were being logical, Dustin,” said Lucas.
“GUYS!”
See the full post
231 notes - Posted November 20, 2022
My #1 post of 2022
Ok, so I've noticed some discrepancies regarding what year of high school Steve and Eddie are in when reading fics, so I thought this might be helpful to some people
S1 November '83:
Steve-- Junior
Eddie-- Senior (1st time)
S2 October '84:
Steve-- Senior
Eddie-- Senior (2nd time)
S3 July '85:
Steve-- Graduated '85
Eddie-- Senior (3rd time starting in fall)
S4 March '86:
Steve-- Post-Grad almost 1 year
Eddie-- Senior (3rd time)
314 notes - Posted October 21, 2022
Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →
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icecreamkink · 3 years
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so i watched cobra kai all in two days and i have so many -
this show has so many cool and smart angles to it, but the same time.... its so stupid oh my god everyone is so dumb literally mr miyagi held all of the braincells in this whole universe 
like i am but at the same time i am not surprised it was made like this, bc in hindsight of course there were hordes of ppl simping over johnny lawrence ....  but it still amuses me that this is like... an Actual Official Thing
ok this will get long so cut it is
how much fun this cast has is super visible and i love it
i rly enjoy how the world was expanded ! i did grow up watching the karate kid movies, so watching how they progressed the world of the movies so organically was pretty cool. it rly feels like its the same universe
i fucking LOVE stories that are largely about a Thing. dancing ,skating, sports its just so thrilling to experience this all consuming relationship people can have with this type of activity? and martial arts are just that much more intense, so yeah, grown ass men kicking each other around at the lightest provocation and a war veteran caring so much abt teen karate is Ridiculous.... but i love it all because thats the intensity i find so thrilling
was kinda surprised with how much im missing mr. miyagi. first because, like everyone is so unhinged jesus christo, it just really throws into relief how much his character grounded the narrative of the movies. but also hes just a really great character
and on that note it rly Gets Me that the show itself aknowledges that and plays that into daniels angst and all the little ways they sorta weave myiagisms into the whole show........ im not getting emotional over this dumb karate dads show OK
related - i really miss hearing ‘daniel-san’ 🥺🥺
ACE DEGENERATE oh god oh no
they really went down the down and out johnny lawrence route huh. like i was always kinda bummed we see kreese choking him and then we never see him again in the movies, and while i love dumpster fire problematic trash himbo ck johnny, its like......................... actually really sad that his life turned out like this fjngn
everytime i hear ‘babes’ and ‘pussy’ i die a little inside. i know thats the point but i am a v cringe easy person, have mercy (ehe)
loved the way they are constantly drawing parallels between johnny and mr. myiagi of all people. hes the handy man of his building that has a bullied kid asking for help and eventually steps up to teach them karate, beats up a bunch of bullies for him, creates a friendship with said kid, estranged from family, drinks his sorrows away, surprisingly one of the least quick to anger characters (which says more about everyone else really but.... Well.), no schemes or ulterior motives hes just tryna vibe here.... oh and ofc magically heals miguel of is asthma apparently. the true disciple.. meanwhile daniel is his usual messy petty self even tho he wants to be mr myiagi so bad 
also interesting about that is how miguels character is a parallel of both johnny and daniel at the same time
overall the parallels in ck are done really well, drawing comparisons and also subverting them constantly. theyre well thought out
THE PARALELOGRAMS
fr tho, the angle being explicitly the cycle of trauma and its effects and how trumatized adults in turn traumatize kids, maliciously or not, is so interesting
but! on the flip side of that, it feels like the writers are getting in their own way @ letting the characters grow. especially this last season. theres only so many times you can do "johnny and daniel are getting along but 5mins later they are (literally) fighting over some dumbass random issue" or "johnny puts in 20% of effort with robby and then gives up" before it gets on your nerves yknow?
i see daniel no longer talks like macchio ingested 15 shots of espresso before every take and idk how to feel about that tbh
interesting tension in daniel, as in, in tkk mr miyagi was there and daniel was frankly, kind of a lil shit, this messy petty spitfire hot tempered sassy kid,(johnny lawrence voice: just... stop being so annoying) but now hes the adult, and he wants to be mr. miyagi... but hes just not, and never will be to his very core and it shakes him and in a way hes trying to find who he is now that he sees himself in a position to be a not! cobra kai figure. i kinda really like that 
plus how that relates to his cobra kai trauma. idk if the writers thought abt it Like That, i think so, but in any case, its interesting bc it seems like daniel has told everyone whod listen about johnny lawrence his Pretty Boy Karate Rival and high school and 84 cobra kai... But. no one seems to know what went on in 85 (or 86? idk) which was just so much worse
like ye og cobras were shitheads, but tkk iii is just two hours of daniel being emotionally and physically tortured. 
like, the third movie is.............chaotic, to put it nicely, and many people ignore it, but the writers clearly didnt. daniels actions are, in a way, responding so much more to the events of tkk iii than to the first movie ie. johnny himself, AND. daniel doesnt rly seem to have dealt with that trauma? he never told sam? doesnt feel like hes ever told amanda? he doesnt even say terrys name out loud? freaks Out over kreese ? the way he reacts to robbys deceit? his FACE when he walks past the new "fear does not exist in this dojo" paint or kreeses photo? hmMm i sense Pain
his fashion tho........... disappointing. where are the flower shirts daniel huh we had one (1) shirt what a tragedy STOP WEARING SUITS ALL THE TIME . also the band ts/grunge bi are a look for johnny but part of me longs for the preppy lovable 80s bully chic johnny lawrence getups
weird that they never used that last moment of karate kid where johnny kinda... snaps out of his anger and hands daniel the trophy almost in tears. like “youre alright larusso, good match” “thanks a lot”  that being their last direct interection seems like itd be perfect fruit for cobra kai but... they just dont. weird. 
especially when, the FIRST SCENE they see each other, suposedly in 30+ years, the first thing to come out of daniels mouth is QUOTE "u still got those golden locks huh?" WHO SAYS SHIT LIKE THAT DANIEL FUCKING SAN 
also amandas immediate reaction "your pretty boy rival?" like. can we talk about the fact that daniel had to have imparted to his wife the very important information that his high school bully/karate rival was like Really Cute and Fucking Hot Actually
 the writers Knew exactly what they were doing and honestly.............. power to them
tkk director voice: and billy was just so cute  
also I was thinking that daniel sounded strangely fond in that first scene, and i wonder if he developed a weird affection for johnny on the grounds that of all of his Karate Rivals johnny was actually the only one who didn’t actively tried to literally kill him
i was actually delightedly surprised with how great the chemistry between them is, like from the get go i am Invested. their rl friendship totally bleeds through and its fantastic
. granted, idiots enemies to lovers friends is my Thing so i am biased  
johnny lawrence: i am down in the dumps, i fucked up my whole life and my sons probably, largely in light of the trauma that the father figure sensei and the philosophy of my karate inflicted on me and all my friends. u know what i should do, as a traumatized, unreliable mess of an adult? teach that same philosophy to some other kids! what could go wrong! 
but really i enjoy the setup of it. i kinda like that i watched it late because, season 1 was johnny setting himself up for failure in a way and it was exciting to watch it all go to shit sjfn
Like. his heart might be in the right place, but theres just.... not a way to teach something like ‘strike hard, no mercy’ and not have it fuck up a kid 
case and point: aisha, miguel and hawk become annoying as all hell over that bullshit in the end of s1, even before shit gets truly fucked up
billys subtle panicked eyes when he sees hawk and miguel fighting dirty in the all valley was SO GOOD especially in parallel with the panic that is so visible in his face in the movie when kreese tells bobby to injure daniel and in the sweep the leg scene 
seen people question wether kreese should have returned and i absolutely think he needed to. johnny needed to realize that cobra kais fundamentals are flawed, at the root, beyond kreese himself being a toxic piece of shit 
also who are we kidding? we are here to see the tkk characters play on new playgrounds!
i get what they're doing abt kreeses backstory, ( also. cobra kai. pq eles caem nas cobras djjs sorry) but did it need to take up that much time? feels like they couldve  done it in half the run time and developed some other stories better 
martin kove has such an evil eye. i love it
love that we get a good follow up to kreese breaks johnnys trophy and tries to CHOKE HIM in the parking lot, which happened in the movie and then....................... was never mentioned again
“the gang is all back together again” aaaa u piece of SHIT 
also. terry silver is definetely appearing ha ha ha PAIN i cant wait
seen ppl say kreese was too much of a cartoon villain like..........................oh......... sweetie........... u dont even Know
interested how johnny will fit into that bc kreese was simping rly hard for johnny here. like i did not expect him to be so adamant to have him with cobra kai ... under his control, sure, but he really wants johnny by his side despite already having control of the dojo and how will terry silver self appointed jon kreeses forever simp going to feel abt that? 
like bitchs dropping by every episode like ‘joooooohnny ..... come bacc to me joooonny......... this ur last warning! for real this time johnny! i wont say it again! watch me ! im leaving johnny! im rly leaving ! im dragging a chair” and johnny is just like. dont let the door hit ya bitch it was so funny pls
and on that subject oof, johnny! doesnt! Know! he doesnt get that side of daniels cobra kai trauma. and i kind of.............. cannot wait for ck 2021 johnny lawrence to meet terry silver like. what a shit show i need a front row seat and popcorn (imagine terry tries some greasy charm and johnny just roundhouse kicks him in the teeth bc he just doest Not Have the Patience for This. glorious)
feels like we, as a society, should acknowledge that cobra kai will never die................ bc their sense of design is just chefs kiss. their name is COBRA KAI. they have sexie sleeveless black gis. theyve sneks. colorful leather jackets with embroided naja insignia, the get ppl thru the aesthetics. evil geniuses
the flashback cuts : masterpiece behavior
the other takes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! of the movie!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! the differente angles!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! of the FIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THE CLOSE UP ON JOHNNYS FACE AT THE KICK 
that scene of daniel and johnny vibing to 80s music in the car. just. oh my god. the fan wish fullfilment. no thoughts head empty.
the new characters! theyre .... good. but. idk. i really like miguel (save for the annoying phase mid s1 - end s2) and amanda, who is a damn riot and has some functioning braincells, but everyone else is       
like dont get me wrong, i dont hate anyone,its not a jane and rafael from jtv situation,  and i am interested and invested in their arcs, but i wouldnt say i like   Like them, as in, personality wise 
like, sams grappling with ptsd was rly gutting and i enjoyed that plus her slight rage issues, 
which nicely parallel torys rage issues. torys background is all over the place tho so im pretty on the fence abt her so far
robby deserves better in every way, and i like how smart and cunning and surprisingly sweet he is
hawk............... is there i guess,
 demetri is annoying in the best way possible,
 carmen is sweet but. i just feel like her character is blunted to make the johnny relationship easier. like when shes furious with him after miguels injury but then forgives him like an episode later? and then convinces him to fight for the tournament bc she had a karate epiphany off screen even tho she was always against it? meh. feels like with the plot thiccening she was swallowed and now shes like a crutch for johnny mora than anything, which is disappointing.
aisha was cool and im kinda mad she wasnt in s3, especially bc a storyline with her tory and sam was like RIGHT THERE , but also... cant say i was super super fond of her... doesnt feel like we ever spent enough time on her
moon the bi icon, 
overall its a good cast but the main draw for me remains the og cast 
the tory/sam miguel/robby Thing. enjoy how theyre Narrative Foils and i like how their stories were so dramatically entangled but oh god give me a break with the teenage love square for the love of god. if u gonna put us through that at least have the decency to not make it so straight
and honestly some sam/tory        miguel/robby romantic tension would even make more sense. just saying! 
also im not sure how i feel abt the cobra kai: red miyagi do: blue theyre going with since some of daniels most iconic looks in tkk are also red. like it was a color they (johnny and him) sorta shared. i get it, opposite but complementary but idk... a little too fire nation and water tribe for me .
 and like the cobra kai kids are so funny abt it bc their outifts grow progressively more ridiculously coordinated. its like do they group chat every morning before leaving their houses? 
robby still sticks out like that tho. he went thru an athleisure/daniel san tsleeves phase and now hes back in the bandts grunge, but his color scheme doesnt fully blend with the other cobra kais. hmmmm.
LOVED LOVED LOVED both the okinawa episode and the cobra kais easy rider episode just such good good heart aching fun
bobby is an icon. he was in tkk and he is now ck hope appears more and more
 tommy is like the most iconic background character. all his lines, freaking gold then and now. sigh :( 
the framing in the okinawa trip was so good everything was so good
i stand by the fact that kumiko was the love interest daniel had the most chemistry with and shes is overall such a joy to watch, loved to see her again, idola, fashion icon
also tkk ii is good u guys are just mean
also really enjoyed chozens role in the episode, his evolution; i love that they introduced the pressure points (ty lee the blueprint) and! the honk + karate! cousins! absolutely iconic
when kumiko reads mr miyagis letters........ oh my god, my eyes FILLED with tears, it was so heart wrenching :(( tamlyns delivery was so emotional and lovely and its so obvious everyone involved in ck has so much love and respect for pat morita and mr miyagi as character, and i adore that it exists like this electric current through the show
when we were watching i told my sister i thought that ali would be miguels big shot surgeon and ngl i am so disappointed that didnt happen. hire me cobra kai writers
also the johnny ali daniel amanda chemistry? off the charts
AND the sassy retconning of daniel and alis breakup! LMAO ‘I HOPE U DIDNT TELL MR MIYAGI IT WAS MY FAULT’ HFDJJGNKFKSD
i am preeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeetty sure back injuries dont work like that    but oke
daniel and johnny are so good together whenever, like they never actually help the kids or get shit done and end up fighting anyway but its just so much fun when theyre hanging
JOHNNY LAWRENCE AND DANIEL LARUSSO FIGHTING TOGETHER
daniels “plan” on how to get robby to juvie was so stupid. literally were u TRYING to make him hate you. dumbass
parents at those hearing rly brave for ppl that did not do ANYTHING as their kids got involved in a karate gang war until now
“bullshit i heard u were the real bully!” i mightve screeched
this s3 ending was SO DRAMATIC omg
everyone is such a MESS go to THERAPY u unhinged motherfckers
also im sorry but uh. a richass neighborhood in california doesnt have some type of neighborhood watch? the larussos rly dont have any security at all? neighbors wont hear the sound of a damn karate brawl happening next door??? also wasnt tory all like ooo i cant go to juvie, my mom yada yada yet shes always running around town getting into fights even at the rich girls house she was kicked out of school for fighting??   ?  ??    ??        ?                ?    ?          ??                  ?    ? girl??
stop destroying the larussos house, its so pretty :((((
sam finding her center looking at mr miyagis picture...  uwu maybe
robby yelling ‘U ARE WEAAK’@  johnny \as he is easily blocking him is like.... so funny and so sad to me. sweetheart. 
also i know it was meant as ‘oh johnny pushes him and HURTS HIM’ but it just looks like robby runs himself into the lockers and IM SO SORRY I FEEL SO BAD BUT IT WAS SO FUNNY 
i like that he and tory are the cobra kai kids now. we need ppl we care abt there to not revert to a good vs evil schtick, and this is the most engaging it could be... tho it hurts that these kids cant catch a break
ah yes "lets bet some real shit on the result of this teen karate tournament bc that is always a great idea" is BACK
so daniel saves johnny from kreese..... maybe johnny will save him from terry 🧐
and dojos unite ohohoho. lets SEE how that’ll work out 
miguels face of Despair when the ck defectors and the md kids are bickering like 'this is never gonna work' : gold
also. Johnny Lawrence is gonna learn some myiagi-do karate AHAAHSJAKDFH
 ive been waiting for this moment all my lifeeee oh lawrd 
final thoughts! there are def things i hope the writers will improve on the next season, but i am very excited for it either way AND i feel like it has made me enjoy the movies even more and that is a win for a reboot/sequel to me!!
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skullrock · 4 years
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in commemoration of season 3 being an entire year old, here are some good things abt it:
Steve’s scoops uniform
Robin. just Robin
Robin’s coming out scene
Steve being an ally
El’s “I dump your ass” like go off sis you get the spirit
ElMax friendship
El becoming her own person and having a wider vocabulary!!! I love her
high Steve telling off the Russians and then Dustin coming in on cue ... incredible
“Steve’s her daddy now”
the entire neverending story scene
the COLORS
“I’m starting to think something’s really wrong with this rat”
“yeah, no shit”
Nancy’s purple dress
actually all of Nancy’s outfits
Nancy and Karen bonding moment
Karen’s swimsuit
Dustin got his teef
Dustin and Steve friendship of the ages
the fucken handshake
that fuckin blonde asshole from the newsroom got his face smashed in (best part of the season imo)
“bald Rambo”
Alexei
Alexei and Murray
Cary Elwes as a guest star
Steve hitting Billy w the car - cathartic
THE LETTER !!!!!!!
“flay this you ugly piece of shit”
actually all of Lucas’ scenes were iconic
Mr. Clarke’s season entrance
that hug Will and Joyce have
💫 KEITH 💫
Steve bumping into the Phoebe Cates cutout and making a grunting noise - iconic
what are ur favorite scenes??? lmk!!!!
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juderoths · 3 years
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what’s poppin , el here. i’m 21 & from the uk.  i go by she/they. this shit got erased cause my laptop died so heres a shitty summary i’ll write a better one someday i apologise in advance. but anyway heres my himbo child,  J U D E  &  if you would like to plot with him, give this a like.  tw  for  abandonment  &  learning  difficulties
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⌜ZETHPHAN SMITH GNEIST, CIS MAN, HE/HIM⌟ welcome to chatsworth academy, JUDE ROTH. it says here, that you are TWENTY, in SECOND year and that you’re here for your ATHLETIC skills? is it true high school you were voted most likely to WIN THE LOTTERY AND LOSE THE TICKET , well, that’s interesting.╱ awkward love poems scribbled on toilet paper , late night phone calls with his family after feeling homesick , a bin full of energy drinks ╳
STATS
full  name  :  jude  roth
age  :  twenty
hometown  :  berlin  ,  germany
gender :  cis  man  -  he / him
sexuality  :  heterosexual
BACKSTORY
karl zimmerman met eudora roth on a business trip while she was waitressing yada yada yada. BOOM. dating. then BOOM babies. specifically : jude & mona.
KARL IS A MAJOR DICKHEAD. turns out the dude was already married with kids. and also richer than he made out. eudora found this out and went to his wife with this. as you may have guessed, both women dumped the man on his ass. don’t let the door hit you on the way out, karl. hate him.
eudora, the angel that she is, let him visit for mona’s sake cause she was a lil baby gremlin at the time. but nooooo mr business is everything over here had to go fucking ruin things again. he stopped visiting, he stopped the money. he fucked off like the lil piss baby he is.
money was tight for ages after this. his sister was often sick and constantly in and. out of hospital. his mum was working relentlessly. jude was struggling with dyslexia. but the three of them had each other. it wasn’t much but they loved each other SO fucking much.
fuck school. that’s all i’ve gotta say. being a kid with learning difficulties at a shitty school is never fun. but sport helped him through that a lot. he felt his PE teacher was the only person who hadn’t given up on him yet. 
college was out of the question for him in his mind. he’d pick up some job somewhere, probably at the local tech store fixing phones. he didn’t see himself making any money doing sport which SUCKED ASS. but, he’d rather help out at home than waste money on some degree that probably won’t mean shit cause the unemployment rate is so high for graduates.
but by some miracle, a rep of chatsworth was at one of his football games at school and he was approached with an offer. what jude didn’t know was that his lil piss baby father was the one that arranged it, cause the bitch felt guilty. the dude he swore he’d never get any help from getting into a prestigious college. not a dick move, but also dickish at the same time
don’t get me wrong. jude felt like a fish out of water his entire first year at school. it was only at his mother’s insistence that he accepted.
I HAVE PLANS TO FUCK THIS UP THO. turns out his half siblings also go here. basically their mum was a model & karl had become a CEO eventually. so obviously they got in. he didn’t really talk to them in first year so didn’t know them. but jude doesn’t know they’re his siblings but they’ve recently discovered that they’re his siblings. and they know about their father’s role in getting him in. it’s all very confusing i know. i like convoluted plots like that.
EXTRAS & HEADCANONS
you can find his pinterest here & playlist here (will put in links later cause neither is finished)
my guy is a soft jock himbo with slight fatherly abandonment issues. he doesn’t like to admit how much it affects him. just wants to prove he can do shit without help ya know. 
fluent in both german and english, but speaks with a berlin accent
no common sense
honestly just wants to chill 
bin is always full of energy drinks
he’s on the football team and on the runners
surprisingly good with tech. will fix ur phone if u need it. when u break ur phone like three times a week it comes in handy
he’s a hopeless romantic. will write love poems at 3 am on toilet paper cause he’s misplaced actual paper
has always had an unhealthy obsession with parkour
calls his family up at least once every couple of days
hufflepuff. nuff said.
CONNECTIONS
gonna keep this short and sweet cause i’m a broken human being right now, but i’d love to see like his number one ride or die, best friends, crushes (dude loves people), unrequited CRUSHES cause i’m an evil bitch like that, sport team mates, someone who tutors him, frenemies, enemies (maybe in the form of elitists at the school) tho he tries to keep it to none if ya get me he doesn’t like having enemies what’s the point why not get along, comfort buddies, buddies that just comfort and shed tears together (he makes for a great cuddling pillow), and of course, his half siblings cause i’m a sucker for pain. but, honestly i’m open to anything you throw my way. 
@chatsworthinfo​​  
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themikewheelers · 5 years
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the art is mike holding a box of eggos in the middle of saying i love you and el is slapping him across the face saying i dump your ass so umm yeah deffo not playful lmao
oh dang yeah again i’m not gonna judge any art without actually seeing it but i def understand why ur concerned
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birdrights · 5 years
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SHE SAID "I DUMP UR ASS" AND THEN LAUGHED AND HIGH FIVED MAX I HAVE NEVER LOVED EL SO MUCH
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Movies I have seen so far in 2018
A few of these arent new movies, just ones ive watched for the first time in 2018. I felt like doing this cuz I really love watching movies and felt that it might be a good version of those "good things" jars, but instead it's movies I saw. Some reviews are short, mostly cuz I didnt really have much in the way of opinions, but I did have something to say.
Just incase you havent seen them. I have tried to keep them spoiler free, but if you dont want even vague non spoiler spoilers, the list of movies is as follows; 
The Grand Budapest; The greatest showman; Jumanji: out of the jungle, King Arthur: legend of the sword, The Black Panther, Shape of water, Thor Ragnarok, the Emoji Movie, the Good Dinosaur, Jurassic world, Incredibles 2, Hotel Transylvania 3, Ant-man, A Wrinkle in Time, Lara croft: tomb raider, Guardians of the Galaxy volume 2, Spider-man homecoming, Ant-Man and the Wasp, Avengers age of ultron (semi live blogged), Captain America civil war, Avengers Infinty War, Deadpool 2016, King Arthur the one with kiera knightly, Deadpool 2, The Nutcracker, four realms, Venom, Love, Simon, Ready player one, Aquaman, Solo, a star wars story, Ghost stories (2018), Wreck it Ralph, Ralph breaks the internet, Goosebumps 2, Hidden figures, The meg, Pacific Rim, Pacific rim uprising, Wrath of the Titans, Mission impossible: fallout,Oceans 8, The Breadwinner, Mune, Operation Finale, The House With A Clock In Its Walls, Bad times at the El Royale, Outlaw king, Gnome alone, Journey to the center of the earth, Hitchhikers guide to the Galaxy, Vvitch, Ex machina, To all the boys ive loved before, Extraordinary Tales, The Golden Compass, Erramentari, the blacksmith and the devil, Dragon heart, The black klansman, Robin Hood 2018, The Princess of Thieves, First Man, Bohemian Rhapsody, What we do in the Shadows, Overlord, For the Love of Spock, Next Gen, Small Foot, The Spy who Dumped Me, The Nun, Kin, Crazy Rich Asians, Spider-Man, Into the Spiderverse, A simple favor, Predator 2018, Rampage, 47 meters down, 2036 Origin Unknown, 2001 A Space Oddessey, The Martian
The grand Budapest hotel - good, great visuals. I enjoyed it.
The greatest showman - wonderful music, actual circus parts were good, the rest was boring. Its really short, and I felt it focused to much on the drama in pt barnums life, too much focus on a silly fuax love triangle, not enough on the acts themselves. I went in hoping to see the acts interact and actually be presented as the forefront. The beginning showed this magnificent scene with the acts, with this wonderful musical number that made me tear up. But then, it was just about Barnum and his kids being boring most of the time. The songs and musical scenes though? Absolutely wonderful, magnificent, stunning, and entertaining. Zendayas and Zac efrons characters duets? Beautiful, I loved the song and choreography. I just feel like the emphasis should have been on the circus itself. Hugh jackman. Needs. To. Do. More. Musicals.
Jumanji: out of the jungle - hilarious omg I laughed my ass off!
King Arthur: legend of the sword: wtf was this movie bro? I mean. I have a new song in my cars playlist, but wtf.
The Black Panther - IT WAS SO COOL! I loved the visuals and the storyline. Shuri is my favorite genius and I can’t wait for more Black Panther
Shape of water: absolutely beautiful omg
Thor Ragnarok: you mean that was the actual movie, that tumblr wasn’t just fuckin with me, like, those were real ass scenes that were filmed?
the Emoji Movie: bad, forgettable, literally did not remember watching it till a friend asked me.
the Good Dinosaur: literally a children's movie, idek why I watched it tbh
Jurassic world: THE HUBRIS OF MAN! THE INDO RAPTOR! BLUE! They made... An indoraptor. Not just any raptor, oh no, that's not enough for the hubris of man, its an indoraptor. What's an indoraptor you may ask? Well it's when you mix a raptor, with the indominous rex DNA. But Cotie, didn't the indominous rex already have raptor DNA? Wasnt that the whole thing that it was a t-rex with raptor DNA? Yes, yes it was. But this one is different, it's smaller, it's smarter, it made to obey commands like a war machine, it's the I N D O R A P T O R! So it's just a super powered velociraptor? Yes, yes it is. So what makes it special? THE HUBRIS BEHIND IT!
Incredibles 2: awesome! I loved it! Those flashing scenes really were no joke though. I don't have epilepsy, but damn those scenes were hard to look at. But I absolutely love the fact that edna babysat jack jack for a night, and gave him a super babysuit. I hope we get to see more of the other superheroes helping out the incredibles!
Hotel Transylvania 3: it was a good movie. Its the only Adam Sandler movie series I can stand, but it was a decent movie. I like the introduction of the van helsing family, and the whole premise. Plus I love the message that its possible to fall in love again.
Ant-man: "in like the Flynn" niiiiiiiiice Tangled ref! "ANT-THONY!!!!" Ok that was a fun and hilarious movie. I fucking love the three wombats, especially Luis omg. Also I love Scott lang relationship with his daughter and that he was the driving force behind his motivation. Also not gonna lie, I kinda watched this one so I could go see Ant-man and the Wasp, but I liked this one too.
A Wrinkle in Time: FUCK ITUNES NOT WANTING TO WORK DURING THIS MOVIE! ok but Chris Pine as a Dad? Awesome. "Happy anniversary, if only you'd dissapear too" wow, these high school preps are viscous. Also I love the little kid calling out grown ups for being pieces of shits. Also this movie was adorable and heart felt and I loved the mix of fantasy and science that made it a science fantasy movie omg.
Lara croft: tomb raider: ok but the girl who kicked Lara crofts butt in the beginning has me gay as Fuck man. "OPEN IT! OPEN IT! OPEN IT!" OK calm down Nicolas cage.
Guardians of the Galaxy volume 2: omg that was indeed another real marvel movie I had just seen. I can't believe the stooges are a space family that just, does stupid things. I love them all. 
We gonna start some parralels; a wrinkle in time - a movie about two siblings trying to find their dad who has been lost for 4 years. They get him back through the power of love; Lara Croft: Tomb Raider - a daughter finds some adverturing stuff to lead her to her father who had been missing for 7 years. Tries to get him back by killing men. Doesn't, and then kills more men; Gaurdians of the Galaxy volume 2: a boy finds his father after 34 years, but turns out he is a huge fucking jerk, also finds that Mary poppins was his dad after all, but then both Mary poppins and jerk dad died, with varying degrees of mourning from Boy.
Spider-man homecoming: omg so many second hand embarrassment scenes but it was so good! I laughed my ass off at the ending omg tony no. But also, that awkward moment when ur dates dad threatens your life and he actually meant it...
Ant-Man and the Wasp: Dude. Duuuuuuude that end credit scene. Duuuuuuuuuuuuuude. That movie was just as hilarious as the first ant-man movie omg! It was fun and incredibal and I'm so happy the 3 combats were there. I was losing my shit over the baba yaga stuff!
Avengers age of ultron (semi live blogged): god, I'm 9 minutes in and I hate this movie... 13 minutes in an ur telling me this could've been avoided if marvel hadnt turned two Romani (from what I remember of mutant canon) characters into, not only human expirements instead of mutants, but voluntary hydra agents. -sighhhh-... 20 minutes in and why, why Tony, just... Tell the team, why do we gotta have lazy 'i dont wanna communicate' writing bullshit...Jarrrrrviiiiissssss my boy T.T... Did they really just try to make dissimising female characters and using their achievements as a sort of 'my horse is bigger than yours' as quality character writing? God this Bruce/Nat romance is so forced... Oh no, Ultron fucking appeared, why does he sound like a bad Tony stark impression? Ultron is fucking annoying... Fuck man, the plot with the twins have arrived, and I hate it... -mentions Wakanda- thanks for reminding of a better movie I could be watching... God, the acting is either way too dry, or way too ham... Wow... Clint is... The most mature person in the movie... Wow, the scene where Nat reveals she is infertile, is worse than I thought it would be, and I knew it would be awful... Hour and a half in, still bad... Though ultron is now acting like a c h i l d... Oh no, now we creating Ultron 2.0 this time its Jarvis... Please discuss it with the team, pleeeease... Annnnnnnd U didn't... Fuck... I'm so tired, 1 hour and 31 minutes and the team is fighting... Thor coming in for the jarvis Saaaave! Yassss vision with the worthy of the hammer! Okay the battle scene with ultron was pretty cool. Still dont like the movie over all.
Captain America civil war: not as much fighting as advertised. Too much 'we arent going to sit down and communicate' trope. Honestly I was too bored and tired to really actually pay attention to closely... All I got from it is the russos need to learn what a get along shirt is and be better film makers.
Avengers Infinty War: wtf, what the fuck, was that. That was some fuck right there. You are telling me thanos was really able to get the soul stone like That? And the mind stone like That? And all that other bull shit? Y'all Russo better be ready to have thanos ass kick in the next avengers movie. But damn that was some shit that happened.
Deadpool 2016: I loved every bit of the movie omg, it was everything I hoped for out of a deadpool movie.
King Arthur the one with kiera knightly: That uh, sure was a King Arthur movie? Way less weird than King Arthur Legend of the sword. Merlin didnt cast magic, and arthur was a Roman, but guinevere is a kick ass archer, soooo acceptable...
Deadpool 2: THAT WAS FUCKIN HILARIOUS I LOVE DEADPOOL SO MUCH! god I love this movie, I would die for dominoe.
The Nutcracker, four realms: such a cute af movie omggggggggggggg. I loved Captain Phillip the nutcracker soldier and the gold highlight they put on his lips 💓
Venom: listen. I did no t see this film for quality. I saw it for the symbi ote ok. Ok. I lov it. But blease for the love of god.... Y.... Did...... The......... Symbiote........ Take the shape of a sexy comic book lady..... When........ The same sexyness could have been achieved by letting the symbiote be big beefy orc like lady....
Love, Simon: I'm not one for these films... I dont like these films... They are teary eyed wholesome cake frosting that make my cold gay heart sick... That being said... I relate, I relate so much... Also... If I was in simons shoes and the blackmailing weasle Martin outed me? They would still be scraping him off the pavement... That is all.
Ready player one: it wasn’t as bad as some of the things i heard about it on tumblr, but its not one I will watch again.
Aquaman: "show off, heh, I could've just pee'd on it" is the exact quality line I want out of my films. Also that was soooooooo awesome! I loved it! More Aquaman!
Solo, a star wars story: Not bad, but not great, it kept on plot really well, not memorable but I won’t knock it. I still say the actor playing Han Solo looks photoshopped and not real.
Ghost stories (2018): awful... It was slow and boring, and I didnt like it... I rented it through itunes and it glitched part of the way through and I stopped being able to see the picture. Even after I got it working again I still didnt like it... Though I did like the message of "dont be a bystander", but the whole this was boriiiiiinnnnnnnggggggggggg.
Wreck it Ralph: okay, technically I caught the beginning like 4 or 5 years ago, but I finally actually watched it and it wasnt bad. Will go see the sequel.
Ralph breaks the internet: WAYYYYYY better than the emoji movie, also, I really loved the princesses scene, the bright colors, and following Venelope through the internet... Also.... Ralph........ WTF..................... Also............................. that Stan Lee cameo.................................... Heartbreaking............
Goosebumps 2: Mr. Chu and his Halloween obsession is me... Stones appearence had me dying omg... Also where tf r ppl getting these awesome super cool Halloween stuffs!
Hidden figures: IM NOT CRYING UR CRYING! omg such a great movie i fucking loved it. Couldnt understand a WORD of math that went on, but damn girls, calculate that shit.
The meg: listen... Listen... The trailer looked stupid... And ridiculous... I just... Wanted to know how bad... And it was bad... But it was incredibally enjoyable omg... I loved it... In all seriousness, it was actually a pretty beautiful movie when it came to marine life and the wonder behind it, and it was anti shark culling for fins, and it was very clearly "not all sharks are bad, they do as they do, but megalodon is about to fuck our shit up."... It was also fucking hilarious... My favorite character was meiying, the little 8 year old in the movie... The love plot wasnt forced and they way they did it the two leads were not having it and had actual chemistry... Just... Also the dog... The dog does not die... Pippin lives... The wedding is not ruined... Also the shark ate a billionaire soooooooo... We good meg... We good...
Pacific Rim: yes I know, I took a long ass time to watch this movie... But Listen... Explody robots and monsters... Hannibal chau... Look... I just... Sometimes take a long time to watch movies... You wanna know how long it took me to watch Merlin BBC? I watched every episode as it came out and then put off the last episode for 5 years... Listen...
Pacific rim uprising: ok I watched the first one so I could watch the one with my boi John Boyega in it.
Wrath of the Titans: wtf kind of movie... Like really what the f... Since when is zues ever responsible and wise.
Mission impossible, fallout: I liked it. It's an action movie. Saw it for my birthday, kinda interested in the other mission impossible movies now. I appreciate the advance tech and the obviously stupid impossible shit.
Oceans 8: Listen, i have never been interested in the Oceans franchise, i dont want to see crusty men steal things, but lads, im gay. Extremely gay, just, shamelessly gay.
The Breadwinner: holy shit that was a good movie.
Secret of the Kells: eh, it was a good movie. Not my favorite, but it was good. I mostly just like the animation.
Mune: Guardian of the Moon: dat was a cute movie, and also i loved Munes Design, he is a little fawn
Operation Finale: Wow, that was an amazing film, absolutely superb. Not at all like the trailers. Seriously, what is it and trailers where everything has to either be an high stakes action movie or a romantic comedy? but this film, spectacular.
The House With A Clock In Its Walls: A Neat little movie. Corny, but i liked it. like, its a kids movie in the same way A Wrinkle In Time is, but this one was little less disney-fied in the way that they needed to have this overarching lesson of empowerment, and more “this is a kids movie to enjoy, like Halloweentown”
Bad times at the El Royale: neat movie, somewhat engaging, kept losing focus at the slow parts... Liked the Chapter title cards... Can't remember who that "important person" was supposed to be.... I think I may have missed it...
Outlaw king: I liked it! Way better than Braveheart! Also.... Cpine was not that naked.... Butt....
Gnome alone: weird, didn't like it, like a bad combo of Mean Girls and Coraline?
Journey to the center of the earth: I said old movies were gonna be on this list now didnt I? Also this movie was awesome and I wish the book was real too.
Hitchhikers guide to the Galaxy: Nice!!! I had been meaning to read the book before I watched the movie, but I've packed my book away soooo, MOVIE. Also out of all thw sci fi movies that have destroyed planets, this is by far the only good one.
Vvitch: it was okay... By the middle I was kinda wishing it would go faster. But it was okay.
Ex machina: I'm not done with the movie yet but it's so fucking creepy holy shit... Also "its kinda non-autistic" in relation to "aware of her own mind and mine"???? Wtffffffff.uggggghhhhhhhhhh ewwwweeweeewewweeeewwwwwww the talk about giving the robot a sexuality is so grooooooooooooosssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss he gave her a working vag and hearing him talk about fucking the robot was baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaad. Mmmmmmmm no, did not like.
To all the boys ive loved before: Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww... Also that sibling relationship was..... Relatable.
Extraordinary Tales: tales based on Edgar Allen Poe and holy sweet Jesus I loved it, it has multiple different art styles per story and I loved them soooooo much!
The Golden Compass: okay but how could you end on that cliffhanger and not at least put out another movie????
Erramentari, the blacksmith and the devil: based on Basque folklore which I know nothing of, but it looked neat. It's also originally in basque but netflix has the English dub over. AND HOLY SWEET JESUS I KNOW THIS MOVIE IS SUPPOSED TO BE SCARY BUT THE VOICE OVERS ARE SO FUCKING FUNNNNNNNNYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!
Dragon heart: I didnt like it, there were better movies I could have seen, I'm not gonna reach for this one again...
The Black Klansman: Damn, I might very well be speechless. That was a Fantastic Movie, came at you like a bag of Bricks, and the ending when it went straight from a cross burning to the 2017 neo nazi rallies, to trumps “good people on both sides” speech, to everything that happened in 2017. The movie did NOT fuck around with anything. God Bless.
Robin Hood, 2018: Antifa film of the YEAR! Yeah Robin, Be a Class Traitor to the ruling class, Spread Wealth, Down with the 1%!
The Princess of Thieves: OMG Kiera Knightly as the daughter of robin and also a kick ass archer that causes trouble!!!! Loved it!
First Man: dude that movie was incredible, it read like you were seeing snapshots of his life, not completely invested, but as though you were a spirit looking at memories. I kinda liked it. I loved the silent scenes that filled the viewer with anxiety, like a realization of the gravity of what was happening. Omg. Good film A+
Bohemian Rhapsody: OMG I LOVED IT SO MUCH OMGOMGOMGOMG MY QUEER HEART IS RESTORED AND THEY SAID BISEXUAL!!!!!
What we do in the Shadows: that was an enjoyable movie. I didn't quite like the reality show format but it was funny!
Overlord: That was a great movie! it had decently fast pacing, which is good that it was only an hour and forty-eight minutes long... They Plot-Ex-Machina’d alot of the movie, like the wounded soldier feeling fine for the main firefight, then remembering he was supposed to be wounded all of a sudden. I watched it with a friend who saw one character, turned to me and said “He’s cute, i hope he doesnt die” one (1) second before a landmine went off. Also, Ghouls created by science rather by supernatural means.
For the Love of Spock: -cries like a big baby-
Next Gen: screams of anti-tech ideals... Also.... Damn...... They are channeling the "addiction to iPhones" angle man, like, villianous angle...
Small Foot: Not bad, At least it was a Short movie, or at least it didnt feel like it was dragging on. The Songs were great though, I actually liked them and at least they were written for the movie and not like, a song that already existed...
The Spy who Dumped Me: I rented it through iTunes and it gave some Ukrainian nuts swangin in my face...
The Nun: it was okay, but let maurice theirult be a lesson; u see some creepy haunted shit, you grab a cross and you walk away. You dont go back to play hero, cuz then you get possessed.
Kin: there is a line in the movie that says "you got a decade of bad decisions under your belt" and I feel like that sums of this movies plot points...
Crazy Rich Asians: that was so gooooood! I don't normally go for romcoms, but ppl had been praising the film, and I actually liked it. I'm glad I saw the majong scene explain before I actually watched the scene, because it felt a shit ton more powerful.
Spider-Man, Into the Spiderverse: AMAZING! INCREDIBLE! the animation was TOP NOTCH, like, omg!
A simple favor: I didnt like it... It tried to be both a thriller and what seemed like a parody of a thriller.
Predator, 2018: I kinda liked it, it was a mindless action movie, and the ending left it open for a badass sequal. I havent seen the other predator movies so I have no idea if this is in faith for the series, but im guessing yes.
The Martian: It was cool and chill, I liked it, also Mark Watney cussing out a government agency via a hundred thousand dollar communications outlet is.... Mood.
47 meters down: 2hrs of one woman having an absolute panic attack and being right to worry about sketchy diving boats.
2036 Origin Unknown: kinda what I feel like 2001 a space Oddessey wouldve been like if I had actually watched that movie... Oh shit the Borg!
2001 A Space Oddessey: Have I ever told y'all that I dont like Kubrick or his movies? His movies are the epitome of that pretentious art school boi style that just does too much and tries to pretend it's more than it is and sweet merciful god why is this one 2 and a half hours long! I'm 40 minutes in and I have a head ache from the over ise of classical music and boring slow pace of the movie. 2001 a space Oddessey is 2 and a half hours long and only has 1 hr of actual relevant film... The other 1 1/2 is just unending, weirdly colored space shots, two color inversion shots of planets and eyes, theremin and flute noises, and classical music set to nothingness
RAMPAGE: a 30ft alligator showed up about an hour and 10minutes into the movie and the first reaction was "well that sucks" and it killed me on sight. The movie is awesome! In am so glad I picked this as my last movie of 2018.
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therealeagal · 6 years
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Supergirl - Both Sides Now
So anyway, we start things off with Kara and the gang and like 20 bazillion commandos raiding the house of Julia Freeman, who may or may not be one of the World Killers like Reign.
And she’s surprised that they’re there and all, which is understandable, so Kara tells everyone to stand down.
Then Alex pulls her gun again because Julia reached out her hand when Kara offered her own hand.
So anyway, Julia switches to her evil alter ego and starts using her powers but J’onn sticks some power nullifying handcuff things on her.
Cut to my girl Lena and Sam talking about their past and Lena is making Sam take a hiatus since Sam’s so stressed, which just goes to show that Lena is awesome.
Then some plot talking happens.
Then Alex, who is suddenly a jerk this episode, is like “She doesn’t really have an evil alter ego, she’s just evil to the core front and back.”
And Kara’s all “There’s some good in her.”
And Alex is like “We’ll try it your way and when that doesn’t work we’ll do it my way.”
So then Kara tries talking to Purity (the evil alter ego) to get through to Julia.
Alex is all “Good cop, bad cop, ftw?”
And Purity’s all “Naaaaaaah.”
I forgot that J’onn’s spaceship is a car. Shapeshifting technology. What will they think of next.
Then back to Good Cop, Bad Cop.
Purity’s still like “Trololololol”
Is sisteren a real word? It’s like brethren, but for sisters, obviously.
Then Alex is all “Really Bad Cop, ftw?”
And Kara’s like “Too far, sis. Really Bad Cop FTL.”
And then Alex is like “Really Bad Cop Anyway, ftw.”
And now Mon-El and Imra are fighting so they can set up an excuse for Mon-El to break up with Imra and go back to Kara.
Then Alex goes to talk to Purity and is all like “Really Bad Cop Anyway, ftw!”
And Purity’s like “lol u just mad cuz ur girlfriend bailed”
Then Sam and her daughter go ice skating.
Then Kara and Purity speak Kryptonian.
And then Sam goes all evil alter ego and then Purity breaks out of the containment cell like nothing.
Then Purity TKOs Winn and a bunch of red shirts and bails.
Then back to Mon-El and J’onn’s like “Let’s share a brooski, bromigo.”
Then Mon-El’s like “Political marriage no jutsu. I loved Imra but now that Kara’s around I’mma dump her like a sack of potatoes.”
Then back to Sam’s daughter, who’s sad cause her mom disappeared. She doesn’t know about the evil alter ego.
Then the gang goes after Purity and Winn’s like “I invented a thing that has a 99% chance to succeed, meaning a 100% chance to fail.“
Oh, Winn’s invention actually worked. Surprising.
Then Purity’s like “Innocent bystanders ftw!”
Then Kara’s goes “No more good cop. Ass whoopin time.”
But then Kara gets her butt kicked and Mon-El tries to save her and also gets his butt kicked.
Then Purity’s like “Lel good alter ego”
Then Alex is like “Good cop ftw!”
Then Reign shows up and is all “Lol I’m evil.”
Then Julia’s like “Heroic sacrifice no jutsu!” and Reign flies off with her.
Then plot involving Julia and Reign’s...mom? Evil high priest lady.
Then Mon-El and Imra talk about how they’re probably going to have to break up their marriage because Mon-El is still in love with Kara.
And then Imra’s like “Ulterior motives for coming to the past ftw!”
Then Kara and Alex talk about Maggie.
Then Sam talks to Lena and Sam is all “Why you such a bitch, Lena.” which is completely out of character. Apparently she was channeling a bit of Reign just there.
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