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#elezar azoulay
efingart · 2 years
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Just What I Needed - Chapter 19
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A hand gently touched her shoulder to rouse her.
Bell could feel the mattress shift as someone sat down next to her. Without opening her eyes, she grabbed the edge of the bedcovers and pulled them over her shoulder, knocking the hand away. 
All she wanted was to sleep.
Not ready to face whatever they had in store for her today. 
She heard a hollow thud as something was set down on her nightstand. 
The scent of coffee hit her nose. 
“Brought you coffee,” He said quietly. At the sound of that familiar gravelly voice, her eyes snapped open.
There was no way.
 She nearly bolted upright in bed. Bright loght streamed in through the open door behind him, beaming through the windows in the room just beyond. The backlighting made it hard for her to focus on his face. 
“Whoa, you ok?” 
He was holding out his hands as if ready to who knows what- steady her?
“Maybe you don’t need coffee,” He chuckled and reached for the mug on her nightstand as if he were going to take it away.
“W-” Bell shook her head and corrected herself, “Frank?” 
“Better be, I’m wearing his underwear.”
She could just make out a smirk on his face.
She looked around. She was in her room, in the apartment she had shared with Woods and Mason. 
 Frank and Alex.
 No gray concrete block walls. And real bed instead of a cold uncomfortable cot. 
“You’re still feeling a bit out of it, huh?” 
Woods reached up and pushed a hair out of her face, his hand lingered on her forehead. 
 Checking for fever maybe? But why?
 “I don’t,” She shook her head, “How did I get here?”
“You were kind of out of it.”
Not wanting to look at Woods she looked down at her hands and balled the bedcovers up in her fists.
“I wouldn’t take your calls,” She said shaking her head, “I wouldn’t see you.”
“Couldn’t just sit back and watch you self-destruct.”
“Frank, I-”
He patted her hand. 
“Look, you should just take it easy, ok? I’ll make you something to eat,” He paused, reconsidering,  “Or… I’ll make Al cook you up something. Yeah.” 
He stood up and left the room pulling the door closed behind him. 
Bell watched him go and sighed. 
 “You think I’m pathetic, don’t you?”
The marionette’s little laugh rang through the room before she materialized next to Bell. As soon as she appeared the laugh ended with a sickening gurgle. Bell had to suspect she was choking on blood again. A surprising feat for someone with a solid wood respiratory system. 
“No, not really. You could just stand to dream a little bigger.”
The marionette coughed. Blood dotted the blanket which began to steam as the air became cold. The bright light dimmed into darkness. And the blanket became white snow. They were outside. 
Bell shivered.
Just ahead of them a lump of snow rose and fell steadily. Small puffs of steam appeared in the air in time with the movement. 
Bell reached out to brush a layer of snow away. She uncovered a patch of gray woolen material. 
The arm of a coat. Bell tugged at it and the snow shifted to reveal a tiny figure.
“Save her,” The marionette urged. Her glass eyes were shining.
“I can’t.”
The ground began to rumble and small figure seemed to sink back into the snow.
“Save her!” The marionette shouted. She began coughing again.
Bell leaned forward reaching for the tiny arm, but the moment she touched it it was gone. Swallowed by the snow.
She began to dig, sending white flecks into the air, but the snow pile began to swell.
Standing, Bell stared at the growing mass. It seemed almost alive.
The marionette’s strings were pulled by the unseen hands that manipulated her, dragging her out of the way as well. She fell into her place, suspended in the air next to Bell. 
“Keep going,” The marionette urged. 
“She’s gone!” Bell insisted.
“She doesn’t have to be.”
Bell didn’t move.
“You don’t have to be Bell in here,” The marionette stared gravely at the ever growing snow. A strong wind picked up and the puppet began to rattle on her strings. But her face was resolute as she said, “Save her. Stay here with us. Rewrite your story.”
“It won’t change anything.”
“You think so?” 
A pair of wooden hands landed on her shoulders.
“You’re already losing your mind anyway. Why not go out on your own terms?”
And then she shoved Bell into the snow. 
The impact as she hit the snow was barely noticeable. A small puff and a rush of ice on her skin. And below that was nothing. 
So she fell. 
She had a point. If she was going to eventually lose herself wouldn’t she want to build a world where she could be anyone and anything? Where her sister could live and grow up? 
They could be together. She wouldn’t have to be a monster. 
No it was too easy.
There was someone out there with itchy trigger fingers who had already shown he was willing to nuke a continent to get what he wanted. And she had been a part of that. 
She needed to carry on, push as hard as she could to ensure that he was stopped before anyone else got hurt. Or died.
“No,” She whispered.  
Saving the world was worth losing her mind.
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Bell shook herself awake. Adjusting her eyes, she realized she was facing a gray cement block wall. A thrill of terror hit her gut as it took her a moment to realize she wasn’t falling into it.
Coming out of her dreams and adjusting back into reality was becoming more and more surreal by the day. The dreams themselves were more vivid and at the same time reality began to slip into gray. 
Just part of the drug trip.
Side-effects. 
Reaching her hand out, she touched the painted-over pockmarked concrete. The cracked callouses on her palm caught on some of the rougher texture, and she pulled her hand back to examine them. 
Reality always felt like reality. There was pain yes, but also there was no mundanity in her technicolor dreams. And it was that that always assured her realize she was no longer in a dream. Dry and cracking hands with thick and sickly yellowed flesh covering her upper palm? That didn’t exist in her dreams. 
“I don’t know why you don’t just stay there,” The marionette said. Bell knew she only existed in her mind, but she still felt her presence during her waking hours. She hovered in the dark corner of the room always just out of sight. But refusing to be left in her dreams.
 She sat up and cracked her back. Another night of discomfort on the cot made the padded gurney in the lab feel like a damned feathertop. 
Bell placed her bare feet on the cold floor and looked up at Adler, sitting on the other cot watching her. 
“What are you watching me sleep, now?” 
Adler said nothing, only smoked his cigarette and stared.
“At least give me one of those.” 
He nodded to the pack sitting on the table just across from her. Bell was sure it hadn’t been there a moment ago, but she wasn’t interested in thinking about it. 
Instead, she picked it up and shook it. Dipping two fingers into the pack, she pulled out one of the cigarettes. 
Lighting with a lighter that hadn’t been there until she thought of it, she took a long drag. 
It made her cough.
Her throat was dry.
“Did you at least bring me a coffee?” She asked him, her voice hoarse. 
Adler didn’t answer, only stared.
The door rattled. Someone was knocking.
She kicked Adler and the apparition dissolved in a puff of cigarette smoke. 
It was easier to talk to real people without an audience. Though he would likely just reappear again. They always did what they wanted to do, nevermind helping her out for her own sanity.
“If you’re going to live in my mind, at least bring me fucking coffee.”
She flicked the imaginary cigarette across the room. 
“Bell, are you all right in there?”
Park.
Bell sighed and looked to the door. It was covered in dried blood where someone had slammed their hands against it until they bled.
Begging for something. 
She absently picked at the tough skin on her hands.
The echo of herself screaming for Adler reverberated in her mind. 
It had been her, of course. It was her blood decorating the door. 
Screaming for Adler to tell her anything, anything about Woods and Mason. That’s all she had wanted. 
They had left her there for days without a word. Unlocking the door to allow her access to the bathroom and shower, of course. And bringing her food. 
They weren’t monsters, after all. 
She was the only monster here. 
“Bell?” Park’s voice called again, more urgently this time. 
“Yeah?” Bell sat back down on her cot. Adler was back, sitting across from her, smoking his cigarette. 
No fucking sense of privacy. Bastard.
The door creaked open, and Park walked through, holding a food tray in her hands.
She set the tray down on the cot, then grabbed a chair and dragged it near to the cot across from Bell.
 Close, but not too close. Never too close.  
 Bell looked at the tray of food. Some toast, fruit, cheese, and coffee. 
Nothing particularly exciting. 
Whatever they could make in that kitchenette. 
No one was spending time or money on making sure she was fed. 
Picking up the steaming mug she hoped to herself that Park hadn’t made the coffee.
Park was shit at making coffee. 
She took a sip. It tasted terrible, but she drank it anyway. Drinking it down in a single gulp, allowing the burning hot liquid to coat her throat. Tears formed at the corners of her eyes. 
It was good to feel something. 
Park was staring at her. 
Bell raised an eyebrow.
“Don’t you have more important things to do?”
“Mason called for you again.”
“What, are you a secretary now? You need to get better at making coffee if that’s the case.”
Park sighed.
“You’re slipping.”
Bell frowned. Of course she was. She knew that. Adler knew it. The girl knew it, and the fucking thing in the corner knew it. 
“So you better hurry up and pump info out of me while you’ve got the time,” Bell said with a shrug. As if she didn’t care. 
Bell picked up her toast and chewed on the corner. 
Park swallowed. She thought Park had gotten over feeling uneasy around her. But it looks like not. 
But of course, Park didn’t know how many times Bell had broken out of this room. 
How many opportunities had she had to kill them all? 
Park. Hudson. Adler. 
Of course, that was if she was actually breaking out. Supposing it wasn’t just in her head.
Bell glanced at the thing in the corner. As usual it had jumped out of the way before she could catch a glimpse of it. 
But she could hear it chuckling.
Bell sighed and tossed her half-eaten toast back on the tray.
“You really think you’re doing something here, don’t you? This remorseful shit?” Bell scoffed, “At least Adler has the sense not to feel ashamed for what he did. Don’t fucking insult me. Stop pretending you’d do it differently if you had the chance.”
Park tossed her head back, shaking the hair out of her face.
“You saved my life.”
“Oh right you owe me,” Bell threw Park’s words back her voice coated with disgust, “Yeah, well, maybe if I had the chance to do it again, I wouldn’t. Save Lazar instead. Or neither of you.” 
The memory of Lazar reaching out to her. The tips of his gloves just brushing against hers. And then she was ripped away. Leaving him to die alone on that fucking rooftop. 
It still hurt. Even when she found out he was part of their little conspiracy. There was a deep ache in her chest when she thought about it. 
Besides he was dead, so he got a pass. 
“I think you would.”
“You were supposed to be covering me,” The feelings of regret were bubbling up inside her. Even if she had just been a colleague of theirs, Park hadn’t held up her end. She said she would provide cover and she fucking failed. Bell had put down her weapon to put on the harness. She trusted Park to watch out. And she fucking chose Park over Lazar. 
“If you had done your fucking job-”
“I replay that moment in my mind every day,” Park interrupted. Her tone was dark.
Bell stared her down. 
“I don’t know what the fuck you think. You have a guilty conscience, and you’re here why? You think this-” She indicated the tray and Park sitting in the room- “atones for that?” 
Bell flipped her hand under the tray throwing it at the opposing wall. Adler ducked.
The thing in the corner laughed.
Park was unmoved. 
When Bell looked down again she saw the tray was sitting next to her unharmed. 
“You think whispering through my door in the middle of the night that Woods and Mason are in the hospital makes any fucking difference to me? Fuck you. At least have the decency not to be ashamed of what you did.” 
She hadn’t intended to lose her temper with Park. But the anger felt incredible. It was empowering to have it coursing through her. To lay into someone. Anyone. And Park goddam deserved it. And for once Bell wasn’t turning it on herself. 
“Should have killed them all,” The thing in the corner hissed. 
“Not Mason and Woods,” Bell spat back.
It laughed.
“Who are you talking to?” Park asked, snapping Bell from her spiraling thoughts.
“Don’t worry about it.”
But Park looked distinctly worried. 
“You’re right,” Park said. 
“What?”
“What you said a moment ago. If I had a chance to do it over again, I would do it. Exactly the same,” Her voice was firm. She meant it.
“Finally, some fucking honesty.”
Park pulled out a pack of cigarettes and offered one to Bell. And for a second, she considered shaking her head. Being stubborn. 
But the addiction nagged at her. And it quieted them.
She took one, and Park stood up to light it for her. Then she sat back down and lit her own cigarette.
She took a long drag before speaking again. 
“Mason called for you.”
“I heard you the first time.”
“Bell-”
“Let him come visit, see what a head case I’ve become. See how dangerous I am.”
She knew why Park wanted Mason here. He could talk to her. He went through something similar. Seeing and talking to people who weren’t there. 
And. What did they call it in his file?
Disassociating? 
He could talk her down, maybe. Give her advice.
Maybe even try to convince her to go back with him. 
But she needed to stay here, contained. Somewhat. Hadn’t she already hurt them enough?
Frank and Alex.
She had sent the people she thought she cared about most on a doomed mission that nearly got them killed. Who does that?
Even if she wasn’t conscious of it she still felt the fear that maybe deep down a part of her still wanted them dead. And set them up. 
Bell would rather go crazy in this gray room than risk that. 
And Hudson and Adler seemed to agree anyway. At least they saw her for who she was. 
Park opened her mouth to say something else, but Bell cut her off.
“Park, just take what you need from me. And let it go.”
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Bell found herself in an unfamiliar small bedroom. The room was dim, lit by sunlight diffused through soft curtains. Across from her was another soft-looking bed. The room was small enough that she could reach an arm over to touch the edge of the other mattress.
Someone had covered her with an old quilt. She pushed it away and swung her legs over to get out of bed. 
“виктория!” A woman’s voice rang down the hall just outside her door.
Bell looked to the doorway, which was covered with another quilt to keep in the heat. She placed her socked feet on the floor and stood on unsteady legs.
Looking down, she realized she was wearing some kind of shift nightdress. Lifting the bottom edge of the garment she examined the hem. Someone had sewn this for her. She dropped the hem and looked towards the door again. Pushing the quilt aside she stepped into the hallway. 
The scent of eggs and sausage frying in fat in some nearby kitchen wafted down the hall. 
He stomach growled and it was then she realized she was so hungry that she wanted to swallow that scent in large gulps. 
Behind her she heard thudding footsteps which caused some of the floorboards to creak. A girl in a matching nightgown ran past her.
“виктория?” Bell asked the girl who stopped mid-run, turned, and wrapped her arms around Bell’s waist. 
The girl stepped back and grabbed Bell’s hand, pulling her further into the hallway. 
They came to the kitchen. A woman was standing by the sink washing dishes.
Steaming plates of food awaited them at the table. 
But this was a shared kitchen. She moved to turn back, realizing that she should be dressed before sitting at the table. But when she looked down again, her nightgown had been replaced by a dark gray wool dress—her socks with opaque tights. 
The other girl, her sister, had taken her seat at the table and looked at her expectantly. Her clothes had also changed. 
Bell reached for the back of her chair, grasping the polish wood. But when she pulled it out she instead found a gray wool coat in her hand instead. 
Now, she found herself standing by the stairwell. The girl was beside her, dressed to go out. 
It didn’t look that cold out, but their mother had insisted they wear their hats and coats. 
Bell shrugged her coat on with a sigh. Her mother smiled inuldgently at her.
Then her face fell and her head snapped back to the direction of the kitchen as if she heard something. Her sister had a fearful look on her face and buried her head in Bell’s coat, wrapping her arms around her.
Her mother turned back to the girls stretching her arms out in front of her. Bell’s first thought was that she was going to hug her. She stepped in. And was surprised when her mother’s hands hit her hard in the chest, and she and her sister were falling through the doorway backwards.
They were going to fall down the stairs!
Bell tried to look to her mother, ask her why she would do this, but she only saw the night sky and falling glass. 
Her sister slipped out of her hands. 
Bell hit the ground; the wind knocked out of her. 
Warm wet droplets pattered on her skin. Above her the marionette hung on twisted strings.
“Stay with me,” She pleaded, “Save her.”
The glass eyes of the marionette stared at her from behind a curtain of limp dark hair. Cradled in one arm was a bundle wrapped in dark gray cloth—a coat. A red stain blossomed across the gray.
Bell raised herself up on her hands, fighting against the pain in her body. Against the sharp sting of the fresh lacerations on her back. Hot blood pooled on the ground around her.
But she ignored it. It was too much blood for one person to lose. But here she could ignore it. 
Bell stood up and reached a hand out her fingertips touching the cold dead fingers of the marionette. 
But quickly, violently the puppet was yanked away disappearing into the night sky. 
Two droplets landed on her cheek.
She wiped them away leaving a smear of blood on her face.
“She’s dead, Bell.” 
 God Adler.
A red door slammed down in front of her with a metallic thud, embedding itself in the earth. 
Adler wanted her to move forward. 
Pushy bastard. 
She turned her back on the door and sat cross-legged on the soft earth. 
The ground was cold, sending a chill through her.
Red doors fell around her, and she shut her eyes, ignoring them. One nearly clipped her, but she refused to move.
Adler could bring them down on her head if he wanted to, but she wasn’t about to move.
A soft wind blew past her. She opened her eyes. The doors had turned to stone.
No. 
She was in a cemetery. 
Those were gravestones. 
She touched the letters etched into the freezing cold stone, running the tip of her finger through each one.
It was a sort of ritual she indulged in each time she came here. A meditation.
The closest thing she may ever have come to prayer.  
Pulling her hand away, she wrapped her coat tightly around her body as an icy wind rolled through the cemetery.
She sat there and contemplated. Asking herself the same question she asked every time she had come here. 
Why her and not me?
Why had she made it? 
By all rights, she should have died. Bled out in the snow. Or be shot by that American.
Fate had other plans for you. 
The cold air made her tired, and her head drooped as she began to doze. 
Rest here with her family. 
If only for a moment. 
“You’ll freeze to death out here,” A gently voice said. She was slow to register it. Slow to react. 
He picked her up and carried her out of the cemetery and she fell back asleep in his arms. 
When she woke, she found herself in a warm room. The only sounds were a ticking clock and a pencil scratching over paper.
He was sitting at his desk, writing.  She was curled up on his green couch. His long coat draped over her. Bell pushed it off. 
“You’re lucky I knew where to find you. You could have died out there.”
She gave him a dull look in response. 
“You’re such a serious child.”
Her expression turned to disgust. 
 She was 16. 
Probably.
 He turned his chair to face her.
“You were visiting your family again.”
An annoyingly obvious statement that she didn’t feel the need to respond to. 
“Have I ever told you that your father and I were friends?” He continued, “We worked together once.”
He hadn’t told her this before, but she kept her face even. She’d spent enough time around him and the people he worked with to know to not reveal anything if it can be helped. If he had caught her off guard, she wouldn’t let him know. And the old man would get to his point eventually.
“I knew what they were planning. Your parents.”
 He knew. 
 She felt a rush of fear. Her parents had warned her to never tell anyone. And she held to that. No one needed to know, especially now that they were dead.  
He opened a drawer on his desk, and her eyes followed the movement, wondering if he had some evidence stored away there. But when he produced a cigarette, she relaxed. He lit it and smoked. He was going to let her sit with her thoughts. Maybe to see if she would reveal something. But she knew to wait. 
 “Get their children out. Provide them with a better life in America,” He waved his cigarette as he spoke those last words. 
“I never thought they would buy into that nonsense. And turn their backs on their country,” He took a drag and eyed her. 
She had been holding her breath. 
He knew. 
Had he known this whole time? 
What was he going to do to her now?
“People will do what they can if they think they are protecting their children.”
It was then that she realized she hadn’t blinked, so she blinked now. It was the slightest movement, but his eyes flicked to hers. He had caught it. 
“But what if the Americans didn’t want you there? They’re afraid. They think everyone is a spy.”
“How-” She cleared her throat, “How did they know?”
“The Americans? Well, someone told them.”
There was no controlling herself. She leaped from the couch and onto her feet. 
“You?” She accused him in dark voice.
He stared at her and chuckled.
That fucking sound.
She was seething. 
He stood and shoved her back down onto the couch. Bell sputtered at this like an angry cat.
“Of course not.”
He looked her over. His denial hadn’t done much to calm her anger.
“What if I told you I found the man who betrayed them?”
“What would you do?”
“I’d kill him.”
 “-memory lane-”
“It’s a process.”
 Somewhere outside of her head the gods were fighting. 
Bell continued, ignoring them.
 They were standing in front of a door in the basement. A single ugly utility light illuminated the green painted metal door. Two guards stood on either side of the door. 
“He’s here?” Bell asked, staring hard at the door.
“He is.” 
The man placed a hand on the latch of the door and pushed it open a crack. 
Then he handed her a pistol. 
No one had given her a gun before. Outside of the shooting range at least.
Those were his orders. She was too young. And what did she need a gun for anyway? She was only breaking codes and providing translations. 
She took the gun and looked it over. 
From beyond the door she could hear heavy breathing. 
Who was behind it? Who had betrayed her family?
She had to know. And it would seem that the last thing they’d see was her face before she pulled the trigger.
Would they recognize her?
Bell stepped forward and pushed the door open.
There, in the center of the room, tied to a chair sat an old man.
Not the menacing figure she had expected.
He looked frail and starved. Beaten and bloody. 
Her breath caught in her throat as the man lifted his head and looked at her. Green eyes just barely visible underneath thick gray brows. 
“виктория?” The old man croaked. 
His voice dry. His face was so pale it seemed transparent. She could make out the blue veins spidering just underneath his skin. Blood dripped on the floor behind his back, his restraints cutting into his wrists.
Tears threatened to breach her eyes. But she wasn’t going to cry. Not in front of these people.
Not in front of him.
“We found him hiding out in an abandoned building. Living with the rats-”
“No!” The tutor rasped. 
The old man put his hands on her shoulders. 
“He betrayed your family.”
“Why?” She asked, her voice was soft. 
“To save his own ass. Coward,” He spat, “He was helping you to leave. Teaching you and your sister English. Idiot. Americans already have targets on their backs.”
“But the Americans were the ones who came for us-” Bell started. It didn’t make sense. Shouldn’t it have been the KGB then?
She looked up at the old man wide eyed. 
“He must have got a sense that the KGB was watching-”
“You!” She shouted, “You were watching! You asked all those questions!”
Bell raised the gun pointing it at the old man. 
He put his hands up, but signaled to the guards to stand down.
“Yes,” He admitted, “It was my job to look out for those who weren’t as committed to our cause. Imagine the pain I felt when I found out that my old friend, someone I trusted, was among them.”
 He took a beat before continuing.\.
“So I watched your family. And the people who lived in your building. We tapped into all communication. We followed everyone. And when I found that this man had betrayed you all, I came running. That’s why I was there that night. To warn you. To save you. But when I saw that building on fire, I thought I had lost. But then you were there, just barely clinging to life in the snow. I had to take you in.”
 He was right, he had saved her. She would have bled out if he hadn’t been there.
If his aim was to kill her, wipe out her family, then why would he have saved her? 
Bell shifted her stance, pointing the gun at the tutor now. 
 “Pretty speech. What a hero,” The tutor chuckled bitterly. 
“Funny coming from a man who sold out children. You contacted the Americans to get yourself out. Because you realized as soon as her family left we would start looking for anyone who helped them. But the Americans wouldn’t have bothered with an old nobody like you. However, they were interested in a scientist who had ties to the KGB weren’t they? That piqued their interest. And they could pick you up while they were here. Nevermind the family. Isn’t that what you said?”
Nevermind the family. 
Bell felt sick.
She thought he was her friend. That he was helping them. He had seemed so kind.
“They hadn’t expected a fight from the mother, had they? But she was just doing what mothers do best. Protecting her children.”
“Do what you need to do, виктория. I can’t weave tales the way he does,” The tutor said with a sigh. 
“If you don’t do it, I will,” The old man said matter of factly, “He will die tonight either way. Justice needs to be served.”
His words lit a fire in her. 
If anyone was going to do it it was only right that it be her. She couldn’t bare the shame of not acting. 
And so she fired.
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Bell turned up the handle on the shower. The lukewarm water quickly turned hot. But it wasn’t unbearable.
She placed her hands on the cool tile wall in front of her, letting the water run over her. It created rivers in the deep scars of her back before rolling off her skin and going down the drain.
She had killed a man and she hadn’t been certain about it. She had acted on an impulse. Because the idea of not acting had been unbearable. 
The memory felt fresh in her mind. Another regret to add to the list. Her chest felt tight with it. 
She could have asked more questions. She could have fired at Perseus. Which would have resulted in her own death, but wouldn’t the world have been better without them in it?
As these memories came to the surface wasn’t she realizing more and more that her existence only caused more suffering?
“Come with me,” The marionette called to her.
What would be the harm if she just quietly slipped away into her subconscious? 
Who would miss her? She hadn’t given the CIA any good information today. Perhaps she was reaching her expiration date. And they were only delaying the inevitable. 
“That’s just the drugs talking,” She whispered. 
She wasn’t thinking clearly. Bell turned up the hot water again. Her skin began to redden. 
Maybe the pain would bring her to her senses.
She leaned forward, placing her forehead on the tile.
“You don’t have to suffer like this. Haven’t you paid for your sins already?”
 Was she right?
 “We’re waiting for you. Come with me.” 
Bell slumped against the tile, slipping down the wall until she kneeled on the shower basin. Tears began to roll down her cheeks.
“Ok,” She relented.
tag list: @scumbagg @shieldsbucky @sogdads @quizzyisdone @stupid-stinky
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efingcod · 3 months
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Helen Park, Russell Adler, Elezar Azoulay, Greta Keller - Brick In the Wall
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pricescigar · 2 years
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Eleazar 'Lazar' Azoulay
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ashykneesbro · 3 years
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Park: *goes to lay down on a couch*
Adler: *laying down on one side and resting on the arm*
Park: *goes to lay down in the bed room*
Sims: *mf is sleep*
Park: *goes to just sit down on a chair
Frank: *sitting down on it*
Mason: *on his lap*
Park: *goes to sit down on a fucking drawer*
Lazar: *I am sleep*
Park: *spares him*
Park: *goes to lay down on the fucking table*
Bell: *laying down it*
Park: *throws bell off and lays down on it*
Bell: BLYAT-
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pricescigar · 2 years
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Eleazar 'Lazar' Azoulay
Another character who deserves more appreciation 🥰
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pricescigar · 3 years
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Lubyanka Breifing
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Bonus photo, Adler getting told off by Hudson:
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pricescigar · 2 years
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My favourite safehouse conversation
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pricescigar · 2 years
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College AU
Admin Note: @chrystallenex is my main source of ideas, and never fails to do so! (You ask and you shall receive!)
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Elvira knew this was a big opportunity for her, the one you should never take down. Alas it made no difference. With her amazing grades from school, she managed to get into College with no problem at all. And so with the many subjects that would be good for her; In the long run she chose Art & History. Both she was passionate about (On the sidelines she keeps herself up today in terms of learning English and Russian at most) Both she was fluent in, well to be honest she is more confident in speaking Russian rather than English itself. Today was her first day of College. Admittingly she felt nervous, it was in a different location, new people, new area. Hell everything felt new to her at this point, it wasn’t long ago she moved to America anyways. Her adoptive parent/Guardian had an amazing job opportunity, once in a lifetime. He also assured that he wanted what was best for Elvira; No matter what it was, he liked seeing her happy and cherished her like any parent should cherish children and not do the opposite of it.
Her adoptive father better known as “Mr King” It wasn’t his actual name but it was a nickname, he gained it over the years by reputation. He dropped her off in front of the College Campus, luckily for them it was a ten minute drive. At first he asked her if she wanted to stay at the Campus but she didn’t want to. He understood regardless, and was happy with whatever choice she would make. And doing in what made her happy and that’s what ever mattered to him
“Have a good day ok? I love you, if there’s any problems don’t hesitate to call me ok?” King replied, he adopted Elvira  two years ago even he was astonished at how quick the time went by. And how quickly Elvira grew up to be such an individual; Personally he had no children himself. Due to him working all the time,and when meeting Elvira it was as if something clicked into his mind. And the rest is basically history, it was the best thing that ever happened to him.
“Don’t worry I'll be ok, and ja I’ll make sure… have a good day too, Vater.” Elvira smiled softly at him, she kissed his cheek before taking her seatbelt off and getting out of the car and shutting the car door behind her.
“You know- I have a golf club in the car boot, and I swear if any of those jockeys or bikers. Whatever you call them these days and hit on you, tell them they'll get a visit from Mr King himself!” King would say before laughing at his own joke.
Elvira couldn’t help but laugh as well, shaking her head looking back to King. “But that won’t be necessary, I will make sure they won’t bother me at all.” Elvira would say to him reassuringly. The last two years may have been hard for Elvira, despite all of that healing that needed to be done. But despite that, King helped Elvira through it. She may not have had the best Childhood but he helped her heal her inner Child as many would say. And that alone was enough, she wasn’t scared to share her own feelings anymore like before all of this.
“Hey! Excuse me miss! Watch out!” A voice called out, and Elvira turned to see someone who was speeding on a skateboard fast going towards her. Quickly she moved out of the way, sadly the person lost balance and hee had fallen off the Skateboard
“Ok, ok you win. Have a good first day at College ok sweetheart?” King smiled at her, it was one last kiss on the cheek before he would drive off to work. Elvira would wave goodbye before she looked over to the huge Campus, it was magnificent. Elvira took a deep breath , before beginning to walk trying to find her first class which was History. She knew it would take her a while to get used to this place, and that was ok. Elvira could cope with that, there was no true meaning in getting lost. She could either follow the many signs, or simply ask someone.
“OW! My head, fucking shit… Bad idea, bad idea…” Frank groaned in pain holding onto his head. Elvira quickly saw that he had fallen down quickly going towards him. While Woods’ best friend had quickly followed behind as well.
“Mein Gott, are you ok? Let me see if you’re bleeding or not.” Elvira would kneel down towards Woods, keeping her eyes on him as she observed how badly he had hit his head. Woods removed his hands, soon opening his eyes. Once those eyes opened, he had seen the most beautiful woman he had ever seen in his life; Woods became speechless, practically lost for words. He could get lost into those eyes of her’s, such a unique colour. Green and white as well. There had to be some meaning behind it, and her raven black hair was such a beautiful colour too.
“I’m ok, really I'm good. Been through worse, ya know? Say, never seen you before… You're new here. Aren’t you?  Cause you’re really beautiful.” Woods became bashful as he grinned a little, he felt giddy but happy.
“Well I’m glad you’re ok, and ja I’m new here. My name is Wolff- Elvira Wolff, pleasure to meet you.” Elvira stood up, extending her hand out, Woods gladly took it and she helped  him up from the floor.
“Damn such a pretty name, I’m Frank Woods pleasure to meet you! You’re gonna like it here. Hell I mean everyone likes it here. Hey Mason! Come and meet the new girl!” Woods called out to Mason, who soon arrived quickly.
“Damn Frank, you really need to be more careful.. You could’ve hurt her, you know?” He then turned over to Elvira then he smiled, she was quite beautiful. Hell this might be his chance to hit on her, if Frank hadn’t tried to do that already, trying to make up for the fact that he had nearly hurt her in the process. He then smiled at Elvira, introducing himself to her. “Names Alex Mason, Frank’s best friend, sorry if he nearly hit you. It was my fault, dared him to come bowling into the Campus as fast as he could.” Alex then chuckled nervously.
“Well it’s good to meet the both of you, aand it’s alright as long as you apologise for it. It’s all good.” Elvira assured them, she knew it was an accident anyways; And a dare, so there was no point in making a big deal about it.
“Hey, I just had an idea. Maybe we should introduce her to the others because they'll like her. And then Park won’t be the only girl anymore. Good idea eh Alex?” Frank then nudged him. With Alex nodding in agreement to him. The lectures wouldn’t start for another good couple of minutes, as trying morning lectures were. It was good to kill some time, just a little bit.
“Yeah good idea Frank, Elvira, would you like to join us? The others are really nice, it’ll be good to get to know you a little more.” Alex offered to her with a smile across his face, of course they wouldn’t be offended if she said no.
“Oh of course I would like to, both of you sound nice anyways. And I’m sure your friends will too. Let’s go.” Elvira replied to them with a smile, both Alex and Frank were happy the trio began to walk to where the others were hanging around near the campus.
Adler, Lazar, Park, Sims and the others were hanging around. They had no idea where Frank or Alex went, it was almost like they had disappeared. Which wasn’t the first time, so they didn’t really care so much. They would wait till they would return, it killed some time anyways before the Lectures. 
Adler was smoking a Cigarette before seeing Frank and Alex in his sight, along with another person beside them Elvira. He had never seen her before, so he easily assumed she was new. At this point sometimes it was easy to tell if someone was new or not. “Oh so none of you actually hurt yourselves for once, though I wouldn’t be surprised if you did.” He then looked over to Elvira. “Never seen you on Campus before, I’m Russell Adler what’s your name?” He asked with curiosity.
“My name is Elvira Wolff. It's good to meet you Russell, actually I met Alex and Frank at the front. Poor Frank hit his head a little, but I think he should be ok.” Evlira spoke reassuringly, before waving to the others. They acknowledged and said hi back in their own way.
“Yeah, nearly hit her, but luckily Alex told her to move as quickly as she could.. And then I hit my head.” Frank chuckled nervously, before Russell shook his head a little. But it made the others chuckle a little; “typical Frank.” They would always say. 
“Well luckily I ain’t mending no wounds, no nothing.” Lawrence would say to Frank, before then waving over to Elvira. She did seem pretty cool, even by looking at her. “Hey new girl my name Lawrence Sims. Can’t wait to get to know you!” he said.
“I’m Helen Park, looks like I won’t be the only girl after all. You’ll fit right in.” Helen would say, winking at her which made Elvira smile softly nodding to her
 in agreement. 
“Last but not least.. I’m Eleazar Azoulay, but you can call me Lazar for short. Sometimes I prefer that. But welcome to the group Elvira.” Lazar would say giving her a kind smile, they all seemed happy to meet her.
“It’s so good to meet you all, I’m sorry if my English is a bit bad. I only just moved to the area not long ago.” Elvira replied, regardless of that they seemed to understand her pretty well. And that was good, today was already a good day already. She couldn’t wait to tell her father about it when the day was over.
“So Elvira, what are you going to be studying here?” Park asked her curiously, she was eager to know just like everyone else.
“I’m studying History and art, two of my favourite subjects. I did well on both of them, my Vater told me to pursue my dreams so.. This is what I'm going to do.” Elvira said, smiling softly, feeling excited. She couldn’t wait for it.
“Oh that’s so cool I’m doing History too along with international relations. I can show you where the History Lecture is. We can always walk there together. And I can show you on the map where the art department is.” Helen said to her.
Elvira nodded in agreement and smiled at her, sitting down next to the others and getting to know them. Even finding out what the rest of the group wanted to pursue in the future at hand too. Sims was doing Computer Science and Engineering, Lazar was doing Chemistry and Physical Education, Adler was doing Russian and International Relations like Park. Alex was doing mathematics and Physical education, last but not least Frank was doing Physical education like Lazar and also.
“Shit it’s almost time already? Well see you all later, don’t wanna be late again!” Woods would say, quickly going away quickly, Lazar and Mason couldn’t help but chuckle saying his goodbyes and quickly following Frank. Everyone individually said their goodbyes and a day of Lectures would begin.
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pricescigar · 2 years
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Eleazar 'Lazar' Azoulay NSFW HC's
Requested by: @smokeywhalee
(PICTURE IS MINE, NO PREFEREED SET GENDER & FOR EVERYONE TO ENJOY)
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Where to even begin? There's a lot of things Lazar could say about his s/o his face lit up with happiness, whenever he sees you, so sweet, so tender, though he may seem intimidating. But you? You made his heart go all soft. How charming
While his experience in sex, he never talks about. That's the kind of talk he keeps in closed doors, something for you to find out, until the right time came along
The night that neither of you, as a couple would never forget, in a life time. Implanted forever in your mind, you always seem to think about his hands for the most part
You were astonished in how amazing Lazar was during sex, an ultimate sex God may be an exaggeration but it's the truth
Your first time together on having sex, it was amazing, speechless, no other word could express it. How fucking amazing you felt
Some kind of euproha, you just didn't know, you still think how overstimultated you was because of it...
How his large hand gloves across your body freely, through every curve of your body to your ass and chest. Everywhere
Becoming weak to his touch, almost making you go on your knees for him. How he does it, you don't know but something about Lazar just makes you go all giddy for him
He espeically loves when you squirm out of anticipation, pleasure and pure excitement
He loves to spoil you, that's for sure. He'll treat you like royalty. Or thst you're the most fragile thing, in the whole wide world
The strong urge to hold you agant his large frame, his arms wrapped around you while your naked bodies are against each other. He loves to hold you
Needing protection, but he also loves your confidence and independence. As much as he loves caring for you, doing things for you and other things. He loves how confident you are, amongst other things too
He loves to sweet talk with you, a very upfront man. That's what Lazar is, he loves calling you by pet names, whisper dirty little things in your ear
If Lazar is feeling cheeky, he'll wrap his hand around your waist hell maybe even your ass
He loves your body, if its one thing. Lazar loves everything about you, one thing he would love most is personality and body
Yes he couldn't choose one, because he'd choose both. What a teased he is, but you love Lazar that way
Pretty much you lost count on how many times he marked you with so many hickey's, planted everywhere on your body
Both of you are sexually active, hard-core kind. The passion like an forever burning fire, undiscribable. You both are always yearning for each others touch, it espeicslly gets lonely when either of you go away for missions...
But when either of you return for missions, I think you know whats bound to happen during the night when you return. A night of passion and love.
He's an old fashioned lond of way showing love, Lazar loves to do the simplest things. Even giving them a little twist sometimes, he's a creative man after all
Aftercare: Different, is a simple way of putting it. Still with the traditional of caring each other's needs, however for Lazar's love of food. He would defnitely offer to taking you out for food after
You'd want all the strength back much as possible. Even when it crosses your mind, for a possible round 2 now would you? One neither could refuse
Despite all that, Lazar truly loves you with all his heart. He would love to spend the rest of his life with you, you are the light of his darkness in life
He loves running his fingers through your hair, your head upon his chest. His sorting instincts hugging you, giving you the greatest bear hug he could give
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