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zeraphimtwins · 4 months

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Absolutely excited for music in 2024...

I am so proud to feel that I can find the stability to finally work on some more ambient and electronic music again...

Ahh I have been so tired of not diving deep into my energies in this way anymore

Whether it was used and drained up from turmoil not of my doing -- and whether it was also paused while I worked hard in vocations that I love too; REGARDLESS

The cornucopia of elements and processes that go into producing, finishing, and sharing music -- definitely needed money and especially money for concept art cover pieces and etc for spreading it a bit on the interwaves and webs. And now I sense is the time.

I'm certainly starting 2024 early. And now more than ever I have absolutely nothing and nobody in my way. Whether I wanted it or not; nobody has ever stood in my way.

Well tbh and to be quite frank

No one has ever been in my way in my life when it comes to my life's passion.

And this break seriously refueled my tank and refueled my imagination as a fan/audience member of the music i love to produce, and it served so much time for me to study with no pressure of making money from it and no pressure from any time limits.

These few years of my creative hiatus helped me learn my electric guitar and definitely allowed me to strengthen my resolve of producing for bands and album curating especially for connects that I know and have.

I miss London immensely for this fact -- I miss the collaborative spirit and amazing souls I met there. I will be back one day soon forsure; work-wise and enchantly in music studios again forsure.

And blessfully, with all my happiness in my world, I get to start over again in producing following the same tender care and love of never being pressured of making money out of my music and having a time pressure from someone else still. I am supremely happy about that point when I truly meditate in my decisions and space.

No one has ever been in my way in my life because I know I have the absolute strength and resolve in my craft and held sacredness immensely dear to me that I know it shows in my DNA; it bleeds out of me every time I'm back in the creative flow and creative Sanctuary.

I love this life but wow have I missed being immensely selfish with my time and space to dive deep and make this my only angle of shooting these stars again. Shooting these immense energy worlds. These wise wise spaces for inspiration that exist outside of me and yet always reverberating in my mind's beautiful eye and soul and handed to me through past lifetimes and especially those I met last.

Sigh... this brings me so much calm knowing my hardworking point of views have ALLOWED me this sort of personal and immensely deep freedom. You can try to kill my heart -- but what is funny is that my soul has never ever ever been affected profoundly by anything in this life yet.

Have at it, and remember this serenity that is unbridled with immense power for me and for me only.

#personal

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scrumptiouswanderer-blog · 6 years

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Inevitable

In the ironically cream-colored vigorous walls, Layla decided to wait for his husband, Jacob who is currently in the grief corner of the hospital, the operating room. She deeply hopes for a successful operation by his les époux to a seven-year-old girl who has a defect in heart since she was born.

What happened? she asked as the mighty doctor went straight to his office in the weary face and kissed her cheeks.

The operation did not result well. But I am thankful that Anna is a brave kid. She keeps holding in her life even the operation went somehow difficult.

Love, why don’t you rest in the meantime? You know, make time for yourself and for us. Anyway, I cooked carbonara for you.

I will. But I need to check other kids too.

Yes, Dr. Scott. I got it. Can we go to our kids?

Of course. I am pretty sure that they missed you and your stories. -

Daddy!

Mommy!

Four kids – Cassie, Hazel, Matthew, and Liam delightfully come up with the couple as they walk towards to the ward. They hugged and kissed the two like they did not meet for years. Cassie and Matthew are both having congenital heart disease while Hazel has glaucoma that may lead to blindness and Liam has leukemia for already two years. The kids together with Anna called the youngest doctor in the hospital, Dr. Jacob Scott, ‘daddy’ because he is a father material to his patients at his age of mid 20’s and named Layla as ‘mommy’ as the wife of their dear daddy.

Hi, our little ones! Do you want to continue the story of the princess and the dragon?

Yes !

I want ! they enchantly said.

Layla seated comfortably along with the kids and started to share the majestic story of the princess and the dragon.

As the princess wake up from the deep slumber, the dragon slipped away from being a freaky creature and transformed into a handsome prince. They both escaped the hollow curse of the witch and they lived… happily ever after.

After the storytelling, the hospital employee delivered meals of the children for dinner so the two bid their goodbyes to them.

JACOB It is 6 in the evening when I finished eating the food made by my beloved wife. It also calls to end my duty in the hospital until my phone rang.

Really ?

Now ?

Okay. I’ll be there in few minutes.

Who’s that?

Mr. Johnson, there is an urgent meeting in his office. Can you wait for me? Or you can go home already, just wait for me there.

Maybe I will go home first so I can prepare for our dinner.

You sure? Are you alright?

Yes, I can handle.

Bye. You take care. I love you.

Goodbye, love. See you soon.

- An hour later, after the emergency meeting with the hospital head, there are many patients being inserted in the emergency room. The nurse said that the people were being involved in an accident nearby the hospital I rushed to check the people inside when one of my co-doctors approached me.

Jacob… Layla is included in the victims who were rushed in. a sudden pain appeared in my chest and I quickly went to the ER to find my wife.

Her body was covered in blood, I cannot just stay in the corner so I went nearby but the nurses are refusing me to let in.

She’s Layla Scott! She’s my wife!

Let me in!

I repeatedly shouting outside the room, I do not care. I just want to be with her this time.

20:05 They declared you dead.

I am fainting and trembling as I walk towards you. Eyes closed like you’re sleeping, seeing your angelic face that enlightened my colorless life. My heart went fully empty. Why my love? Why did you leave me?

As the choir sang melodiously, the spatial door of the Cathedral opened and it released a beautiful lady in white appeared to be the most beautiful on her very special day. Anna, the bright and strong kid that I used to be my patient before survived. And as I am seating in the second row in front, she stopped and hugged me tightly.

Thank you, daddy.

Sudden tears came out from my eyes, it has been two decades after the miserable stage of my life happened.

When Layla left me.

The groom, Liam, the little boy with leukemia survived, too. As her bride went beside me, he also rushed and gave me a hug.

Thank you so much, daddy.

I cannot manage the happiness and the little pain I felt inside as I am now staring at two people who truly love each other purely, Liam and Anna, my former patients and my forever children. When Layla left, I was able to read one of the entries in her journal.

I will be the happiest person on the planet if I can give my heart to Anna. She’s a precious girl, one of kind kid. I know she has many things to do here. She has many reasons to live, to be happy and have her own family in the future. If I died, I will voluntarily donate my heart to her. She’s one of our children in the hospital. I love Jacob, and if I give my heart to her, Jacob will still feel my love through her.

It was the hardest decision I made in my entire life. Giving the heart of my love to someone I love, too. Anna being the receiver of the organ are really happy and his groom also for having her completely.

I hope Mommy Layla is also here. So she can witness us…

I answered a meaningful smile to hide the suffering.

Change is inevitable. Change cannot be planned for what we want. Change sometimes occurs unexpectedly.

When she entered my life, my story has changed. She changed me. From who I am and brought out the best that I can be that I did not expect.

Now she’s gone. She’s gone by already twenty years.

It also changed my life.

But internally, there’s one thing. Years and decades may pass… My love for her did not change.

Her last words were, Goodbye, love. See you soon, that I did not forget.

I guess it’s time to say see you there.

#fiction shortstory

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