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#ending. i read for a revenge story. sucks when it doesn't deliver.
purplehanfu · 9 months
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Self Indulgent Birthday Post: 2023
notes: Spoilers!, probably. Yay, it's my birthday again! Enjoy some of my finest unfinished work!
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Oh? You have both my interest and attention!
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Booooo.... (this disappointment brought to you by The Young Brewmaster’s Adventure, which happens to be the prequel to Blood of Youth)
Recap Recycle Bin
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So many dramas and never enough time to write a full review. Read on! 
Dominator of Martial Gods
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tl:dr for this drama
Each episode is 35 minutes long, feels like 3,500 minutes, and delivers maybe 10 minutes worth of story. Impressive! 
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We waste a great deal of time in the first few episodes watching Qin Chen and the bootlicking alchemist refine a needle that will allow our hero to activate his bloodline. Intriguing, because you often hear dramas refer to treasures being refined into weapons, but you never see the process. There's a reason for this- it does not make for compelling viewing. But that does not stop us from standing around arguing about the specs and adding things to the oven. This process was more fun when Chu Wanning just takes you up to the lake. On a technical note, I am enamored of the way the ever present green screened background makes no attempt to be in scale with the human actors.
My Deepest Dream
Ooh, a plot with a time loop, evil birds, superpowers, getting sucked into the Marianas Trench when you just wanted to go on a scuba diving excursion and JIN HAN!!! But, as always, there's a glitch in the matrix.
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Our heroine realizes she has lost a year of her life and no one has noticed. No one except the astrophysics PhD candidate turned car mechanic Wu Yu (JIN HAN!!!). Wu Yu divulges that he can read a phone screen at 10 kilometers. But mostly he uses his special eyes to keep an elaborate dossier on the comings and goings of the FL, who lives across the street from the garage he works at. Is that creepy or romantic?
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don’t be silly, if it were a Marvel movie we’d be having an interminable CGI sky battle 
Till the End of the Moon
Meet Tantai Jin. As you may have noticed from his costume design, he's totally evil.
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He's a goal-oriented CEO who's turned the Devil Sect into a high reliability organization that generates impactful customer experiences (annihilation). I bet he's evil enough to use six sigma. But where Tantai Jin truly shines is personal branding. You may not be buying what he's selling, but product recognition is through the roof.
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Tantai Jin seen here working out of his travel office: a flaming, flying boudoir with melting skull detail. This is why CEOs should never make more than 10x what the average worker does.
Circle of Love
I can see why the Republican period was relatively short. Everybody setting fire to each other's estates, staying out late ballroom dancing, getting uniforms tailored, making sure there are enough manacles to chain the female lead to a bed... it doesn't really leave a lot of time for governance.
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We start out, as we generally do, with a clean sweep of the FL's family, in this case via a big ol' raging house fire. Where is everyone? Or even anyone? Even Maid's Revenge scraped up some extras to be dead family members.
My Kung Fu Girlfriend
Slow your roll, it ain't GL.
You know what they say- it's not whether you win or lose the MMORPG, it's how you min max all your stats and then act like an ass in chat about it.
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Meet Huang Xiao Yu. She clearly did not pay to win because she is the low XP real life martial sister of a kung fu champion. In this drama, she'll level up in love and life with the help of an OP MMO NPC who escapes her game and shows up uninvited in the real world.
The Antarctic Octopus
Not to be confused with the 2020 film Big Octopus. I guess that's the great thing about having an audience of over a billion people- even the most niche interest has plenty of content.
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This is how you dress when you visit your Uncle Pete in Antarctica.
In this movie: monsters, explosions, a supercharged ice jalopy and a dedicated ignorance of the laws of physics usually only seen in a Fast and Furious film. But credit where it's due: The Antarctic Octopus delivers. Only 12 seconds in and we get our first tentacle!
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available free on youtube although how bravely they were fighting is up for debate
Bonus Content: Superlatives
In the Day We Flipped
My post of the year!
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Getting over 500 likes on a review? Unexpected.
Forgetting to add a link back to my other recaps? Priceless.
Bloody Romance
still my favorite drama
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when your grandma’s a zombie and she was left in a cave to guard a tiny box with one (1) restorative pill in it and she’s suspended by her hair but her hair is also like tentacles that can kill people and she thinks you’re your mom but she still loves you. 💚💚💚 But then she starts screaming and tries to strangle you with her hair.
Heroes
2nd favorite drama
you know something’s good when you have a file called ‘sappy su mengzhen yang wuxie edits.txt’
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go get your man, Wuxie!
pinboard full of recaps!
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