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A very special message from actor Martin Freeman this #InternationalChildrensDay to all our @GreatOrmondSt families!
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jesuisgourde · 3 years
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For anon, here’s a compilation of the darker stuff from Peter’s journals (Books Of Albion/the online scans/From Albion To Shangri-La). Obviously this stuff is darker and is more of his talking about addiction or mental health/emotional distress etc. So just be aware of that when reading this, I suppose. These all span from about 2002-2013.
Books Of Albion
Still death haunts the life out of many a young'un. I'm strung up useless now in the inner circle of my own conspiracy. Heroin & crack bind my ankles & scrub my back & my mattress my magic carpet whisking me into Arcady, that warm enchanted soft forbidden hiss I'll be punished for all eternity all for 1/2 and an hour of exceptional Liberty, laying alongside the arcadian wench that never forsook me not for all the impatience in hell nor all the dreary darker deeds that the well-meaning wideboy wasted love sweetest rarest hours with Abandon? It rails me, steadies
I thought that you had a clue cant you see what they're doing to me? and they're getting away with it coz you're standing back & taking that shit believe it's true... if it happened to you what do'ya think you'd do? you and I done it all understanding when you're standing against the wall but I wouldn't do that to you... now guess what I'm going to do when I catch up with you put into action what I've been feeling youre so... any idea no dont come near I've no idea what a person can take all these thoughts & I get nasty too yes I will my boy search & destroy
My nominally in disorder / in a fashion commonly nowt in this pressing matter not sort of unignorable pressure - abusive selfish conversations with the blank dirt that glues the corners of my backwards minds intogether outside the high walls levering the face off with the sticky oil of gluey tears. They dry and rip the sense out of the skin's mask. In past lives I was blank... actually deadly sleepy and convinced by my corrupt reasoning that I was wide awake and ready to break into a running jump. As it turns out I fell off a small step and ruined my jumper.
The words they put into my mouth...honestly the cut, paste & twist of the gutter journalist: will they not desist this shit and give the papple a miss. My vanity all in a twist. Ha! No stylist or publicist to protect poor Bilo in the shark infested waters of hell's canal. Oh mercy and the stench of grime and ruddy guts as assassins jackall and jostle in nasty packs about the cartoon character they have presented the numbed readers with... hit & run, dumb down and down and down, until I get picked up by some saviour or other dusted down and up & away unto Arcady. this time next year this lone salty tear that falls may yet reach the sea, drowning in rivers lost under London like Victoriana. Leaking oh my love, I was not waving I was drowning. To the merry tune of a fizzing wire mesh freebase pipey, my shadow shamefaced behind me, cor blimey. god blind me lest I see myself
more or less loss & my heart laid bare the way it comes across that I do not care feeling lost and badly dressed more and more of less & less
oh so you are not here now and so I greive the salty, sopping eventide with a mess of feeling & reeling around the forest clearing in blue that tears afford me. Salt blind I stumble into the night & pile heartache upon confusions. Alas I am last to understand my minds instructions
'come on... you've got to get out of this room for at least an hour' 'why?' Debris, ash, tin lids for egg plates, towels, c.d.s wraps, snaps. Because I love you, as the soundly winds down and the night changes its name. My she is restless, endless energy, spirit, shaking her hips & shoulders to rock and roll in leather zip trousers & stripey t-shirt & one heel what a picture I am still in bed because my body craves rest and though tis like a grave resting here so idly I cannot fathom New York or the world until the knot loosens further. I dont suppose she'll wanna read through another Hancock script. 'There's gonna be a showdown' plays again.
My few weeks of numbness, rage, derangement & solitude were not part of a design but my very core's emptiest expression.
A junky they call me and I'll refuse nothing yet (excepting a piss test, aha!) Am I not a fantastic idiot All good art comes from agony not all great art comes from agony I think I only needed something to hold onto. It has never been about depravity. It's always been about melody.... but melody & I met in many depraved situations. Meeting melody is the victory of the empty spiralling nightmare. Empty in the superficial sense
Imagine somehow poison being proved not to exist in someones heart. Imagine being unlocked from this cell
What to do in this prison. Write? Why? And for who. All you need say is 'Im in nick and it's shite' Fuck the mystery, fuck the intrigue.
[Written in Peter's handwriting] Why do you think this happens so? [Written in someone else's handwriting] what do you mean? [Written in Peter's handwriting] oh I dunno, I mean the shouting and clammering that wears heavy on my heart.... [Written in someone else's handwriting] well I think some people just love drama [Written in Peter's handwriting] I do myself....but this is a personal catastrophe anyway I'm [getting steadily larger and messier] aaaaahh
It stings when I ding, stings like fuck and it's not just to ruck & knock out the chuck my days are spent swerving prangs like old bill in a jag but reality keeps on like a nag "stop it stop it stop it" before you cop it" cop it being worse things than a sting... cop it being worse, than verses that appear in the morning too minging to sing, and there's not much worse than that thing except perhaps death. cop it is death, a blood red card from God if he were a ref
Online Journals
Perhaps this is exactly how it was planned. A lilting unearthly concern for the new centuries affectionate minions. But then how long until the next gruesome example of my own soul. In those bleak few hours tottering on the precipice I age 30 years. I'm now over 2 million years old. closer to 3 million actually
I'll never desensitize, god knows I've tried there's no meaning or comfort & I'm stuck in this role
the my lifes got no real meaning or control write some crappy catchy song you know try & get out of this hole couldnt we write some crappy snappy dont want to stay where you say I belong
Sirens doom loops fucked up kids playing fucked up guitars lives on your tongue ticket room girl lick it dean loves it mean cant get enough I'm not enough gets me though & down it goes. The blasé The bored The empty-headed The impudent The frigid The introspective The imperious The capricious The naughty The ailing The feline - a blend of childishness, nonchalance & malice.
Oh what's the point anyway? I suppose [illegible] tunnel, gets you down this reflected disgust.
in the corner of my mind I'm unfazed by addiction & lead a pure & discipled affair
I dont know any use than it makes me feel sensitive to things but I know I am blank a lot of the time.
what's that awful silent carnage pummelling at my nerve... the whole of yesterday's horror, webbed and plummeting in my little head. shudders & leaves me writhing, still this silent energy, fucked up hallucenhagenic riot I had as a kid, completely out of control, but masked. Have nae had that taste in my mouth for so long. It'll drop me dead one of these lonely nights.
we had bonded bitterly in skanky Kings Cross crack houses some two years earlier. Both of us eager to dissolve & destroy ourselves, at all costs, however meagre. we had been unsuccessful perhaps, now alive with inspiration & innocence
"Poor Natalia...' Frannle said, with what may pass this night for genuine sorrow. 'she never wanted to die, not like us, then... ‘
Is it bad to feel good? It's not good to feel bad when the walls are closing in feel like you've bee had
a tightrope, baby 9 miles high I dont know how to stop & it's a long way & down
Did I mean nothing to you what did/do I mean to you what do you want me to be? what do you want from me?
I never know what to do in these stark desperate hours when, after suffering no resistance to the reckless surge of my pollution... but what I am certain of is... (whatever they say) I am certain that I am still here somewhere in the stinking sinking quick & the dead sand 'bang me up I'm sold says the poet
theres a man who came to stay the boy he replaced disappeared without a trace gave my songs & my soul away noon would say what they needed to say, so he had his way..... if you sail into the sun beware the eyes of green and if the whole world says that you are the one I defy you to refuse them my son
You must forgive me, for I cannot forgive myself and time she stoops to conquer the lot
what good can it do the impatient hanging wretch, soul shallow-fed to full by clippings but greedy belly so empty its eating itself up, spiteful body lumped together bits under a rattling brain, metallic fever and lazy emotions stalking in the heat sprawling on the wooden seat, revelling in everyone's discomfort, sore-backed and sour, there may be some trouble this hour, like each and every hour before it This is no house of correction, this is the hostile house of justified injustice, the house of boredom, the cottage of crippled lives: those caught, stitched up, unlucky, violent, criminally insane, thiefs, hard men, faces. All Londons pockets emptied out and searched and banged up. I'm lost in these hours, never given no release date but I'm sure it must be... it has to be...
And nothing's so pure as I first though and all I was taught compared to your love amounts to nought yet Oh why must am I so easily caught in the trap that you laid for me, so openly, was I the all I could see I was sold I was bought
Image, top middle: a piece of a paper bag labelled "Disposal Bag" which has been edited with black felt tip to read "Disposal Bilo". Image, centre middle: a torn photo of Peter in a house. Only his shoulder and hand are visible Image, bottom middle: a photo from a shoot of The Libertines in their red military jackets. From left to right, John, Carl, Gary, and Peter, but Peter has torn himself out to leave a white profile.
Image, top left: a close up photo of Peter onstage, wearing a severely beat up straw hat. [Written below the photo of Peter.] Look what you done to the boy
Some mysterious devil plays us of against each other at opposite ends of hell. It is so hard to make amends.
mother I look for you in the faces of other women where are you oh European mother berets & my teeth I'm lost mum listen to the words: from a dark lonely, paranoid schizophrenic young man.....
may be, & who will save me? Hard to say... who will betray me
Oh Dolly all summer long I've been crafting sketching shades of sorrow in the saddest songs in the heart of the dirty pretty city and driving kranky fucked up punk ditties that are born as hits dead on arrival just like their punk rock revival
thoughts encircling like smugglers by a gap - for waves to spend forever and all of the mostly past running up to each other
My fingertips filthy, blistered burnt and sliced... a tatty crossfire of plasters hold the end of my right index finger together. I slit it open by accident when I was pulling the razor blade out the razor to slice my chest up with t'other night. Ended up doin' one of the geetars over a monitor on the last night of Brixton, kicking Carl's amp over, showing 5,000 people my chest, blood fury, legging it through Brixton... was caught up with by my tour 'shadow' minder (Jeff) decided, topless & freezing in the street, to head back in. Cut myself a bit more and then rejoined the boys half-way through the Good Ol' Days.
Days running into themselves, nights attacking the rigid structure of conventional subversives. Do we make ourselves sick in the soul, lungeing into long spited long long sequences of repeated oblivion.
safety pins - they that hold my life together - bend and contorted rusty sticks that dont glint coz there's no sunlight to glint 'em
I can't continue the sorrow & pain as I blankly stare at the morning sky the webs of & bubbles awash on the pane as the rains spits at the window and my tears flood the tracks of my gaze and I stumble blindly through the days and soar obliterate my ghostly nights with £200 worth of brown & white
I wanted to go home so badly yesterday. Tears in the night in the evening afternoon The other westerners out here encouraged and comforted me. I had a fucking breakdown. But there is no way out. I'm signed in for a week & the monks are adamant.
Lonely lonely lonely scared alone want to go too tired too.
I shiver in bed, trying to be honest. “I'm not so bad” What is real feeling? Apart from feeling fragility. Hiding places everywhere stashes. In the pillow in the left-flap of the bathroom
The demonic face that scratches at the underside of the skin & swishes & tears & blackens my entire void, my entire soul
What is this dull ache in my heart, these soft tears in my eyes? How can I feel so bad now, after everything? when will peace come? Does it ever? I have just been told the ward I am on - ala hot chocolate delivery - is for 'bipolars' 'manic depressives' and 'depressives' not the drug and alcohol section at Priory lodge. What does this mean? They tried to section me. Zopiclone... 7.5 mg of to help the non sleepy Bilo. 20 minutes and I'll be away I'd wager.
Sonny do not go through that door the light aint through that door Self unmade man
Apparently I am still in need of medical attention being 'sick' and 'delusional' also I have had bouts of crack psychosis and double visions to say nothing of the heebeejeebee's. I'd like to 'thankyou' say to all my fans 'for putting me where I am today' (ie in a hospital bed) in the thralls of a crisis
Friday *Musnt look a wreck *musnt look a wreck *musnt look a wreck
every single gig I play I neither do or die but reason no matter how without       hard I try I'm rotting inside with loss paranoia & pride rode in on a Trojan horse trampled over my dreams but that par for the course
cracking day up elongated nauseous rushing the gutsy calamitous drew. the gear fears nothing & nothing & gear together are fearless, nay, peerless in their assault upon my heart. I wanna cut myself up & pitilessly pitilessly he rammed it home & oh so pitiously
I think something stinks you left me here to rot in the land that time forgot to tell right from now on (wrong) they trudge on falling over aint drowning it aint funny honey I can't find the town ― it's gone stealin real fur So I'm 'a gone gone man man I wake up every day to the same old horrorshow
Taking the piss so blatant sly & sad in extremis
Wear bloody eyeliner to cover painted tears, all my wildest dreams become my deepest fears
What's the opposite of opposite? Identical. Involuntary spasms about my morning: my brain running the show (so badly) sitting feet up like the stereotypical private detective - stencils and silhouettes. Curvaceous widows and quick, loveless lives that spin out of control as the echo of sirens get lost in back alleys. Later that same day... a guitar sounds like an electronic fuzzy trumpet [illegible, page torn] Harmonies... listening they'll all be soon, spending monies. Does it harm me only? All this.... the sensation like the rubber thud of a fridge door, often corrupted. This is very similar to how my consciousness is controlled. Sleep a sometimes awkward and cold alternative to wasting away. I want to 'show 'em' anything because 'they' dont even exist, not any more. Well... to split hairs there are survivors from that era but they are all buried alive, gasping and choking in shitty non-marked graves. So am I (are to [illegible] and sincere bouts of caring for poor me)
Late raking the leaves, restless & dull at heart am I at intervals
oh but must there be another song where I can find it again? I dont want to lose my soul from my pocket.
I woke this morning with a black heart
waiting longsome songless lonesome sad solemn thoughts unknown like so many lemmings destined to follow one another off of cliff edges and high walls disintegrating in programmed graphic pixel explosives light participating in the, now formalized in scrawl occasion of apparent calamity. I do my bit you know that [illegible] And you do more than your fair share (if a romp in the hay with ice man indeed be fair)
to be here I feel a bit hemd in in A bit crowded for what reason?
From Albion To Shangri-La
Why would anyone go to all that trouble though, I ask now calm and with legible scribe and clearish thought? The truth is I can convince myself that others are to blame for my tears and yet when the kids are fucked off, these things I can't just brush off... Tonight's show at Olympia left me broken and empty and deeply paranoid about not only the people around the band but (sinisterly) the band itself. How can this be? After such unity, and aye bonhomie, I am once more crushed and defeated and utterly alone.
……………. Remember Hilary in the Rising Damp episode in which the aforementioned thespian is auditioning and subsequently rehearsing the other tenants' self-penned play? At one point, a line by Alan (Richard Beckinsale): 'Life's a sham, a lousy hollow sham'. I may have the characters muddled but that's the like analysis and somehow befitting my current gloomy mood.
and the guts squirm and gargle with innumerable gasses and gosh the inconvenience of morning has blackmailed me and now I must pretend my skin is not ripped and raw and really not right
I'm a lonely man in a dream Splattered with drops of Nightmares………..
Fine: what atrocities this good morrow? What is indeed to be done at last... A slug of fresh water A romantic thought – this tiny room – shadows of passing cars, a sleeping girl's hand… Delirious and demented. When the heebees met the jeebees it was hoo-rah……… Never the twain should meet again Look what they done to the boy Did the unthinkable Sunk the unsinkable.
You made a powder keg out of your head and a sand trap of your bed. Your pockets are packed with rockets of smack and that is all there is to be said.
Crash into my arms, see rings of pink flesh, infected pools of torn skin and orange tracks, shouting the snaking routes of so many holy veins by the elbows join, bulbous lumps of hardened tissue decorate the inside of the arms along with thin scabs of black and claret. At once both swollen and saggy – a rare and disgusting combination. The mermaid on the right forearm is guillotined at the tail by long winding tracks marks matched only by the tube map on the left. I will say though that my nails are very clean today.
Found to be a little close to home When you're left with gaping holes When the sound of rattling bones Stops anyone from dreaming at night.
I remember the infamous Pink Tower lampissing incident. Tried to kill myself as a birthday treat for 'Nstein by using a lash of piss as an electricity conductor but only succeeded in short-circuiting the whole house.
Cope please cope, someone has to cope
What the devil is getting to you… Some pitiful, invisible blockage is preventing you from padding up the stairs, having a shower and rehearsing your trousers?
This is how they felt after the last ever episode of Colombo was screened. Actually the repeated watching of the Colombo boxed set almost pathological has it become… The almost mechanical way that I now sit through the same shows again and again. It bears similarities to the way in which I pursue this life of sincere drug addiction. The ecstatic sensations that once came from piping and smoking are severely depleted as are the pleasures that came from the enjoyment of the original series of Colombo and yet there is no evident let up in the watching and the narcotics.
My heart is damp but drying My life's a mess but I'm trying
I mouth the shape of smoke-rings thick and cokey. Blood blots all over the fluffy white towelling of the bath robe. My chest heaves and hacks up slumps of snotty black lung soil. My nostrils leak dangly strands of liquid, speckled with tiny crumbs of chemical candy – remains of the many lines hoover'd up the ol' hooter this night pass'd.  My left hand creaks in agony, craters carved into the skin with flesh-melting mounds of pain. A web of stringy lines of blood patterns the back of my hand. They sprout out from the wrist…
Rousing buzz of nervous ballooning noise reverberates around the ears and spirals, not nice, about the eyes.
Truly I can push no more, or I'll be lying on the floor breathless, death, yes Nothing more… Is this to be the final score? Seeking strength now The night at length now Deeply entrenched allow The understanding of this deplorable routine… Now strike, luxurious and loud Rousing the crowd Making the rowdy suddenly rousingly proud United, delighted Under melody's glorious shroud
Is it not impossibly wrong that I scratch and scrape at my own half-healed wounds and woefully wonky layers of blistered 'openings' – the only word that volunteers its honest services; a reliable account of its history, its work ethic to date is essential. Closure must follow if the story concludes with a medical success and a middle-of-the-road values, moral-majority, vote. On this occasion I say hurrah for the very dead centre of my middle core, long may health and prosperity reign upon my fuck'd up forearms. By gum I appear to be a bent-back'd, scabby, snivelling leper this night, yelling curses and bullying at sweet ballerinas. By Christ I need a hand out of this paradise and fast.
And now I roll on through the tunnels, under Paris to Gare Saint Lazare. 'Tis unpleasant the feeling of something hanging over your head, a debt, a guilty admission yet to be made… I feel like a guilty man. Naturally, momentum is given to the energies at work there by natural reserves of paranoia and introspective disquiet.
Masochistic, sick Apocalyptic, fix n lick Fix n' lick, lick lick
Sticky strips off in rips from bloated crust-coated limbs So these were meant as hymns to the spirits that seep about Moody and broody Wits sharp as knives All about may they be if influential in our lives For God's sake my mind has turned itself on and mangled all the rails…
 A boy named Sue is falling apart
I must be coming to resemble a stuck record I only observe and implode with frantic obsession the splintering and staunch silence.
When your shadow blanks you You know you've put your foot in it
Anxiety & destruction Gulfs in the gut Belly wet with teary streams
I can't be trusted, or shouldn't be trusted with the tenderest, tenderest loyalties and affections.
Out of sight, out of mind out of my mind. Swindling swine.
First, second, third hits missed and then looked closely at my lump-laden forearm. All the while I had been thinking on the disappearance of all the old boozers from Whitechapel High Street and actually from the whole world. From the High St of the whole of Albion, such consideration distracted me considerably from the delicate job in hand... then wham! A fat old wiggly worm in a region that has always bemused and bamboozled me in many a set to... with me making to jag the junk and my left arm leaving me cursing the limb entirely. Whallop! A flood of purple black frothy jetting ferment. Not entirely organic sounding but then this particular barrelful is now getting on for its past by banging date. Once the junk and combined coke speedball is mixed with the blood of the first shot it's a race against the clock to get the remaining concoction in the blood-stream. By the time the connection is made, the syringe is entirely maroon and one is invariably well into the great cussing period of intense frustration.
The melancholic servitude of a world without light and life… all is stone, heat is gone, rehabilitation of hope through good English algebra... 'we're all doomed'.
There has been some fantasy talk that is now shaping up for a crack at reality. It concerns taking the cure and kicking this suicide mission for a bit. Finally escape from this escape. This road has too few exits and the hard shoulder is hard.
I ain't got the strength to stand up to me - cos I'm guilty - Basking in the glow Of a wanted man's gaze I'm no spring chicken but I'm game I don't wanna feel like...
...Really Sometimes I feel like killing myself I ain't gonna lie Stick a knife into my heart Because it's better to die Than feel this way Mother fucker gone & killed his soul dignity
See the ratcatcher A mind bent on rats has he Blind with shattered glass is he He leans drunken into me Whispers filth and diseases Death & agony He empties his sack on me And rolls on into infamy
I ain't got the long capability To say what is wrong with me.
Take a nervous peek out of the window, blurred with bubbles of rain. Raindrops. Falling on Yorkshire. My body's a little contaminated, given the relentless battering it's been getting – chemical warfare in effect, some strange, slow, indirect suicide. Might take up another hobby. Sex and ? and Rock and Roll.  Fill in the missing word.
'Tis a straight jacket – as oppressive as one. Nothing vague about horror. Blurred visions of the future. Need to destroy; the thing bites into my bones, digs in. Possibilities endlessly impossible Sweat soaking my clothes, my face awash Toothache in the heart – imagine the pain of that.
Day off after the Manchester Academy show last night. It's a little hazy but I'm pretty sure it was a fucking shambles in a Leeds-esque sense of the word. Pre-gig tension spilled over into tears – Stuart B was there and the pair of us were in a state, talking about what shit fathers we've been, getting angry and para…
Another break in the Sequel to the Prequel tour… and another plush hotel/spa resort to relax in. Given the level of emotional distress these past few nights, it's extremely timelyn'all Bejabbers I'm at sixes and sevens… even Katia's arrival (heart-warming and spirit lifting) concerns me. Thinking of her with ten mostly sex-crazed geezers on a tour bus. It is all my warped perception no doubt.  Her presence will subdue my restless spirit and assist the majority of the lads in their attempts to create a positive atmosphere on this tour. Dark and twisted dementia not being in vogue this early autumn (dementedness?) BouBou bringing her natural and bountiful blessings of peace and aller son petit bonhomme de chemin. So then onwards, and indeed, upwards. Curses upon myself for even imagining the worst I always open up to Katia… offer her my mostly unlikely, but always heartfelt, theories about the on-going saga of on-stage upset. She says I might be bi-polar. I argue that I only suffer such extreme devastation on stage, not in everyday life like genuine manic sufferers. 'Really?' She says. 'Once you told me you couldn't leave the apartment to post a letter.' The debate continues.
When I heard they were evicting me From my own fantasy An executive explained to me How it follows demographically And then the executive said That I should try and be dead By next July Of course we'll miss you But we can exploit and Reissue And sell footage of you snuffing it To Sky
A man walks headlong into traffic – tired of the fight You can only get up so many times, can only throw so many punches – dont have anything left dont believe anymore dont believe in yourself anymore Bejabbers
the monkey's clamped on my back with a finger in my ear, tweaking a nipple and ramming me ingloriously I'm blind with the pain, sinking like a penny down a drain stink like shame thoughts like a too-high-for-the-tunnel-train Blinding pain blind all but the same babbling low : stunned A gecko cackles & beeps rythmically I scratch myself bloody, glutton tubby 3 kinds of lonliness: morning, evening & afternoon It's the same every day. I go on the walk & run & ...& I walk. Flip flopping in the sun.
5.55am Complete, utter, inutterable, stagnant misery set in concrete certainty by cowardice and lament. He sobbed strangely, failing to cry, so fucking grim the sight of his shadow on the ashgrey spillage of shite that was once the floor. That was once his life. Full throated sting of sourness and spite lined his neckinside. Rottoness in the oesophigas and on top of this plop and piss flying upwards defying gravity weilding crying calamity in the shitty bathroom. His body was going on strike and even the ubercapitalists on the board of shareholders didn't dare protest. Like an international company finally exposed to the world as profiting from abhorent working conditions. Lonely Villein squinted into the mirror smudged with blood and bits of poo – “On behalf of the man that used to inhabit this body I apologise.” he typed, reaching up to the sink wherein upon which the typewriter perched in precarious wobbly state. “Sorry, body” He continued, typing and reading aloud as he did so. AAAAAAAAAAgh he said In a strange monotone, not at all dramatic, as the heavy old typewriter fell onto his shin shins With immediate and immense pain he fell unconscious.
the whole riddle of human destiny heightened to the pitch of a personal torture     a personal hell inward emptiness & despair
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outfittrends · 5 years
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25 Most Stylish Ways to Wear Your Crossbody Bags This Year Outfit Trends - Ideas How to Wear & What to Wear
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Mid-Rise Distressed Boyfriend Jeans for Women $35.00
↓ 23. Cute Crossbody Bag and Heels
This is such a great look for heading out to the mall or sitting down for lunch with your best girlfriends! With this ensemble, go bold with a pair of white skinny jeans and top with a black blouse. A casual denim jacket with the sleeves turned up bring a sweet, feminine side to your outfit. Match your crossbody bag with some nude heels (check out the outfit details below!). Last but not least, accessorize with some hoop earrings and bracelet.
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SHOP THE LOOK FOR $ 180
Step Off the Plane Denim Jacket $49
AE Ne(X)t Level Jegging $49.95
Nordstrom V-Neck Tee $15
Red Dress Boutique Nude Crossbody Purse $34
Red Dress Boutique Nude Heels $32
↓ 22. Pop of Color Crossbody Bag
This is such a great winter-ready look for the girl who loves to bring an element of surprise to her ensembles. This crossbody bag gives a flash of color to this otherwise dark outfit and makes the look so fun. Go for charcoal or deep gray coat and wear over a patterned long-sleeved top. For pants, opt for some dark blue denim with turned up hems. Last but not least, some fun sneakers (white, to shake things up!) pull this look together.
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SHOP THE LOOK IN UNDER $ 350
ASOS High-Waisted Skinny Jeans $79
Aurora London The Gigi Bag $151.80
John and Jenn Casual Teresa Leopard Print Sweater $70.37
H&M Wool Blend Coat $45.21
↓ 21. Pretty Boho Lunch Outfit
This outfit blends casual with boho seamlessly and beautifully! Let your leather crossbody bag do all the talking with this look. Pair this lovely white eyelet top with a pair of denim jeans. Accessories are really important with this look, so dress it up with some stacked necklaces and aviator sunglasses. Lastly, use a curling iron or straightening iron to add some curl to your hair!
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SHOP THE LOOK IN UNDER $ 375
AE Long Sleeve Eyelet Tunic $24.97
AE High-Waited Tomgirl Jeans $37.46
Sole Society Anora Crossbody Bag $54.95
Sole Society JIYA Asymmetrical Strap Sandal $62.97
Nordstrom Ray-Ban Aviator Sunglasses $153
MiaBella Coin Pendant Necklace $39.90
↓ 20.  Sleek & Gorgeous City Look for Winter
We love this beautiful and glam ensemble which is perfect for a cold day out in the city! With this look, you will don a navy blue knit dress that hugs the figure and falls mid-calf. Over it, you will be wearing this gorgeous white double-breasted coat. It will keep you warm and – equally important! – ridiculously stylish. For footwear, throw on a pair of knee-high white boots. They match your coat and provide a sleek and glamorous touch to your look. Last but not least, opt for a chic, mini purse like the one pictured.
SHOP THE LOOK FOR UNDER $ 1050
MARYLING Navy Zippered Knit Dress $401
Furla Metropolis Mini Leather Crossbody Purse $298
Sam Edelman Hutton’s Leather Over-the-Knee Boots $ 54 to $ 226
ASOS Double-Breasted Coat 47.50
↓ 19. Weekend Lunch Look – Spring Day Outfit
We can’t think of a better outfit to throw on when you need a sweet but stylish look for a weekend lunch date! This white eyelet embroidered top is so darling and pairs so well with this scalloped green skirt. The crossbody purse of choice is this sweet little straw bag which is complemented by a pair of woven mules. And that’s all there is to it! Super simple and super stylish. For more ideas, check out these 25 Ways To Dress Up For Weekend Date.
SHOP THE LOOK FOR UNDER $ 130
H&M Eyelet Embroidered Top $17.99
JCREW Scalloped Sidewalk Skirt $64.50
H&M Straw Bag $17.99
Target Woven Backless Mules $25
↓ 18. Pretty in Pink Outfit for Spring
You can’t go wrong with this look featuring soft pinks, spring stripes, and an adorable mini skirt. Start with a short-sleeved vintage striped shirt. Wear with a soft pink mini skirt and the footwear of your choice (sandals or heels would look great with this outfit!). You can easily replicate this ’70s inspired leather Gucci bag if – like most of us – you can’t afford the old GG. Accessorize with aviator sunglasses.
SHOP THE LOOK FOR UNDER $ 1345
Rails – Maui Silk Farrah Stripe Shirt $198
Nordstrom Rigid Denim High-Waist Mini Skirt $58
GG Marmont Leather Shoulder Bag $980
VIVIENNE Oversize Aviator Sunglasses $39.45
Jeffrey Campbell Sandalia Lynx $65
↓ 17. Gorgeous Floral Outfit
We can’t think of a better way to make a statement than by wearing this floral and polka dot mixed print dress. It’s bold, it’s beautiful, and it’s perfectly complemented by an equally standout purse. This is a great outfit for those early spring days where there is still a chill in the air (hence a stylish trench coat). And last but not least, opt for a pair of white trainers to mix things up and ensure you will be comfortable regardless of the event!
SHOP THE LOOK FOR UNDER $ 270
next Studio Mixed Print Wrap Dress $185.50
Adidas Originals White & Navy Stan Smith Trainers $80
↓ 16. Polka Dot Summer Day Outfit
With summer just around the corner, we need an arsenal of outfits we can turn to for those hot days, especially when we have lunches to attend or errands to run! So take note of this cute and stylish look! We love this white top, especially when paired with a flirty polka dot skirt. But the real show-stopper is this eye-catching crossbody bag. Accessorize with aviator sunglasses and hoop earrings. Last but not least, go for a wedge sandal for your footwear! Perfect for showing off those tan gams. Here are the 17 Best Polka Dot Outfits You Need To Try This Year.
SHOP THE LOOK FOR UNDER $ 420
Free People Take Me Back Top $30
BB Dakota Connect the Dots Skirt $68
Faithfull the Brand Annika Bag $119
Ray-Ban Blaze Aviator Gradient Sunglasses $198
Sannibel Platform Wedge Sandal $79.95
↓15. Fun Stripey Look for Autumn
We all have a favorite season, but who doesn’t love a crisp autumn day?! This warm, striped sweater is so great for those days where it’s not too cold for a coat but not quite warm enough to go bare-armed. Paired with this lovely crossbody bag, you will be looking stylish and chic. This is a minimal-accessories look, but feel free to jazz it up with some oversized sunglasses like this Nordstrom pair. Lastly, some knee-high boots round off the look and make you picture ready and autumn-ready.
SHOP THE LOOK FOR UNDER $ 1060
Abercrombie & Fitch Lofty Puff Sleeve Crew Sweater $13.34
7 For All Mankind High-Waisted Jeans $189
GiGi Forest Green Abbot Crossbody Bag $172.50
Stuart Weitzman Lowland Over the Knee Boots $798
Nordstrom Quay Australia After Hours Sunglasses $55
↓14. Floral Dress Date Night Look
This is a gorgeous dressy look for a date night or a charity event. Bright and floral, you can’t go wrong with a dress like this. When paired with a darling leather crossbody bag and pink trenchcoat, you will be the hit of the night!
Antonio Melani Double Breasted Trench Coat $169
Nordstrom Small Love Leather Crossbody Bag $195
↓ 13. Stylish Summer Dress Look
We love an outfit that effortlessly blends style with elegance and comfort with class. This look does all that and more! With this outfit, the dress provides the perfect backdrop to these high-end accessories, such as this leather bag and these Quay Australia sunglasses. A white denim jacket brings the ensemble together, especially when paired with some cognac colored slides. Now off you go to enjoy that lunch or hit the mall for some shopping!
SHOP THE LOOK FOR UNDER $ 720
Abercrombie & Fitch Tie-Back Side Slit Midi Dress $55.50
A.P.C. ATELIER DE PRODUCTION ET DE CRÉATION Demi-Lune Leather Bag $440
Everland The Denim Jacket $88
Steven Greece Slides $79
Nordstrom After Hours Sunglasses $55
↓ 12. Casual Denim Look
We all need those few staple outfits to turn to on a day where we are running errands, picking up the kids from school, or just heading out to grab coffee with our significant other. That’s where this look comes in! Stylish but casual, this outfit is all about that crossbody bag. Start with a striped long-sleeved top, slightly tucked into a pair of light-wash jeans. Some pointy-toed mules provide an edge to this look, as well as match with the purse and sunglasses. Loose, tousled curls kick this look up a notch, especially when worn with a fresh face of makeup and various jewelry pieces.
Via
Zander Striped Long Sleeve Easy Crew $64
Nordstrom Something Navy Cigarette Jeans
Nordstrom Vince Ralston Pointy Toe Mule $325
Rebecca Minkoff Jean Crossbody Bag $119
↓ 11. Sporty Chic With Gucci Crossbody Bags
Sporty looks are so fun and so versatile. They can be worn a number of ways and suit more occasions than you might think! Need to make a Target run? Go sporty! Off for lunch with your girlfriends? Sporty is the way to go! Have a brunch date with the hubby? Again, this look covers it all! Keep it fresh by adding a stylish crossbody bag and spice up your boring old legging game by opting for leather joggers instead. A muscle tank and some color block trainers really bring that sport-ready vibe home. Last but not least, accessorize with some rose mirror aviators.
Via
SHOP THE LOOK FOR $ 1681.5
n:philanthropy Jogger Scarlett Leather $248
Madewell Veja V-10 Sneakers $150
Madewell Whisper Cotton Crewneck Muscle Tank $18.50
Gucci Sylvie Leather Super Mini Bag $1,200
Quay x Desi Mirrored Brow Bar Aviator Sunglasses $65
↓ 10. Day Out On the Town Outfit
Ah, who doesn’t love a good old-fashioned day of exploring? It could be a new city or your beloved hometown. Whichever it is, this is the look for you! A sturdy but stylish crossbody bag provides a hands-free place to stash your phone and wallet while you pound the pavement. A light blue sweater keeps you warm and is paired with some navy blue leggings. Some fashion-forward cat eye sunglasses bring a twist to the look. Last but not least, put to use some trainers or sneakers of your choice. Your feet will thank you.
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SHOP THE LOOK FOR UNDER $ 210.00
J. Crew Crossbody Italian Suede Buckle Bag $158
Ann Taylor Cat Eye Sunglasses $48
↓ 9. Pretty, Feminine Outfit for Spring
This is a great look for just about any occasion. Plus, it’s easy to put together and great for the girl who loves to look girlish and feminine. With this ensemble, you will pair a pretty linen top with some mid-rise ripped skinny jeans. For shoes, you can wear a gorgeous pair of slip-on espadrilles. Last but certainly not least is this cute leather crossbody bag.
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SHOP THE LOOK FOR UNDER $ 1000
EXPRESS Mid Rise Ripped Skinny Jeans $39.90
H&M Tie-detail Linen Top $17.99
DSW Espadrille Slip-On $49.99
Nordstrom Mini Marcie Leather Crossbody Bag $890
Here’s another Spring appropriate look with the same crossbody bag. But while the one shared above is more casual, this one is more semi-formal.
↓ 8. Gorgeous Casual Look + Crossbody Bag
What is not to love about this outfit?! Stylish but comfortable, casual and yet fashionable, this look works for so many different kinds of occasions. Wear olive green linen jogger pants with a slightly loose utility shirt. This lightweight crossbody bag features a cute tassel and is not only super affordable but goes with just about anything. Last but not least, jazz up your outfit with some snazzy flip-flops.
Via
SHOP THE LOOK FOR UNDER $ 280.00 
Nordstrom Linen Jogger Pants $59
Nordstrom Miller Flip-Flop $198
Lightweight Crossbody Bag with Tassel $12.50
↓ 7. Super Girly Midwestern Style Outfit
Who can resist a touch of the Midwest?! We sure can’t! This orange chiffon top and matching skirt are worn with a pair of leather ankle boots. Accessorize with white crossbody purse.
Via
Brilliance Floral Chiffon Top and Skirt Set $59.90
Sole / Society Women’s Salmay Boots $44.99
↓ 6. Super Fashionable Trendy Look
This outfit is bold, bright, and beautiful! Super stylish and trendy, this is for the gal that loves to make a statement with her clothing. Start with a bright yellow beret and pair with some oversized sunglasses. Next, don a long-sleeved shirt like this striped one pictured. Over that, throw on a velvety beige vest with signature buttons. This python-embossed crossbody bag is very eye-catching and fashion forward. To round off the look, opt for jeans and converse.
Via
Nordstrom Wool Blend Beret $17.40
Nordstrom LE SPECS Air Heart Sunglasses
Hatch The Bateau Top $158
Chuck Taylor Converse $55
Midi Sac Python Embossed Leather Crossbody Bag
↓ 5. Black & Pink Girly Outfit for Spring
We love a simple but stylish look and that’s what we have here! Chances are you already have pieces like this sitting in your closet. All you’ll need for this look is a simple fit and flare dress. Pale pink like this sleeveless one is girlish and sweet. Over that, you will throw on a jacket like the black, zippered one pictured. For your bag, try out this quilted one. For footwear, try an espadrille or a pair of sandals! Here are some more Spring Outfits With Floral Jackets.
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SHOP THE LOOK FOR UNDER $ 75.00
Nordstrom Love…Ady Scalloped V-Neck Mini Fit & Flare Dress $44.97
Quilted Crossbody Bag $ 29.99
↓ 4. Cute Everyday Look with Bold Crossbody Bag
We seriously love a great everyday look. And there is so much to love about this one! Throw on a pair of street leggings and pair with a long-sleeved white tee. Over that, pop on your favorite jean jacket. Get funky with a pair of leopard print sneakers. Finally, finish the look off with this faux-leather camera bag – perfect for carrying your necessities as you run around town!
SHOP THE LOOK IN UNDER $ 95.00!
J.Crew Perfect Fit Long-Sleeved Tee $19.97
Shein Leopard Print Lace Up Sneakers $20
Faux Leather Wide-Strap Camera Bag $24.97
Old Navy High-Rise Moto Street Leggings $32
↓ 3. Sassy Pink & Black Winter Ensemble
We love this winter look. Simply throw on a knit sweater like this pale pink eyelet one pictured. Pair with black jeans and booties. Add a knit beanie and a brand-name crossbody bag like this super cute Chanel.
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SHOP THE LOOK FOR $ 2230:
Eyelet Knit Sweater
Topshop Washed Black Jamie Jeans $70
RAYE Bevy Bootie $107
Nordstrom Air Heart Sunglasses $ 69
Chanel Mini Crossing Times Flap Bag $1,945
Winter Knit Beanie Hat $18.99
↓ 2. Perfect Vacation Look
Ah, who wouldn’t love to set off for a trip to another country right about now! Well, guess what, with this outfit, you’re halfway there! This darling fit and flare dress is striped and features a Miss Mary Mack row of buttons down the front. Over the shoulders is thrown an embroidered denim jacket. The footwear of choice is simple brown sandals. Accessorize with a straw hat, sunglasses, and a mini black crossbody bag.
Via
SHOP THE LOOK IN UNDER $ 390.00
Madewell Embroidered Denim Chore Coat $129.50
J.Crew Cyprus Sandals $29.50
Nordstrom Joanna Straw Hat $44
Black Mini Crossbody Bag $130
Quay Australia After Hours Sunglasses $55
↓ 1.Dressy & Feminine Floral Maxi Dress
We love how simple and easily replicated this look is. Simply throw on your favorite maxi dress (this floral one is long-sleeved and to die for!). Accessorize with a matching crossbody bag and heels. And voila! You are event-ready.
Via
SHOP THE LOOK FOR $ 1747
Beautiful Drama Floral Maxi Dress $62
Nordstrom Mini Marcie Leather Crossbody Bag $890
Nordstrom Jimmy Choo Lang Sandal $ 795
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Martin Freeman's Character in 'Love Actually' Wasn't a Porn Star (x)
“I think you’d want your money back if I had been a porn star on that... You might have felt short changed there.”
probably because his BDE was too powerful that everyone ended up at the wrong conclusion.
Apparently I missed out on posting this clip but I think it’s actually my favourite now cause Martin demonstrates a proper English Sunday Roast:
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as usual adding text fucks up the quality of the gif itself but oh well
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Martin interview highlight on SiriusXM on Breeders S2
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Martin interview highlight on SiriusXM -  standard BP2 mention
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