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#enjoy this mess
kinerxy · 1 year
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graciegra · 2 years
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LOK + Scenery [Red]
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cvbullshit · 29 days
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Made a overall CV playlist, songs will be added, replaced, or removed if needed
Also gonna change the cover art at some point, I'm unhappy with it
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moon-lv3r · 10 months
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soulmates ~ bruabba pt 1
🦋 category: angst, hurt no comfort, one-shot, soulmate au
🦋 characters: bucciarati, abbacchio
🦋 summary: au – in which people are born with red strings from their pinky that attach itself to their soulmate. the string would not appear until soulmate is born. the string appears physical but one can pass their hand through it. only you can see your own string and where it leads
young bruno sets out on a quest to find his soulmate when his father died, only to learn that his soulmate, leone abbacchio was dead
part 1 - bruno’s pov
part 2 - leone’s pov
🦋 warnings: mentions of drug abuse and overd0sing
🦋 notes: angst moment let’s go !!! this was written all at 2am and i have school the next morning but hey who cares /j… not exactly my best work but oh well i haven’t written much in the last few months bc school has really been eating up my time and i also ended a relationship with someone who was a long time friend of mine. we got together and broke up bc i felt like she wasn’t putting much effort as i was and i wanted to fix it while she didn’t want to disappoint me so we broke up and the friendship just can’t be the same anymore so we ended that as well. life has been shit so here’s a shit story !
this is part 1 of bruabba soulmate au !
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Soulmate. What a wonderful thing. Ever since Bruno was a young child, he had a small red string on his pinky. He never knew how he got it, but he knew what it meant. His soulmate was of a similar age. It often led the young boy to wonder about what his soulmate could be doing. He wondered if his soulmate was thinking about him. He wondered if his soulmate was just as excited about the entire thing as he was.
Nobody could see his string but Bruno himself. It was like a ghost, an invisible string except it wasn’t exactly invisible. He liked it, the idea that this ghost thread tied him to someone that he would spend the rest of his life with.
He looked at his parents and often admired the love they shared in their eyes. He wondered if his soulmate would shower him with the same endearing sight. He wondered what kind of love he would experience. His mind was filled with wonders of a life spent with someone who was still faceless to the little one. Yet, it never dwindled his excitement.
Love was so enchanting.
He loved seeing his parents smile everyday. His mother always had the same spark in her smiles whenever his father gave her one of his surprises. His father always wore the same shine in his eyes whenever his father smiled.
Bruno wanted the love that they had.
Until he witnessed the death of his mother and the damage on his father. His father’s one and only had ceased to exist. Now what? He had no soulmate, what does one do when their only love disappears?
The mess that became of his father was heart wrenching for little Bruno to witness. Why did the world give his father a soulmate only to take her away when they were at their happiest? Was it fair? His family did not deserve for their happiness to be ripped away from them like this. It was a freak accident, a drunk driver had swerved from a tree only to hit Bruno’s mother who was exiting a store after buying groceries.
He watched as his father lost the shine in his eyes and later, the spark in his life. His father was now just a shell of his former self. The smile he once had was buried alongside Bruno’s mother. He hadn’t just lost his mother, his father’s soul was gone too.
How was soulmate such a beautiful yet morbid thing?
Bruno grew up, watching his father suffer from the loneliness that had struck him. Therapy helped but it was never enough. Over the years, he slowly recovered but the heartbreak will never truly leave him. Shards of it remained in the form of tears in the middle of the night when he thought that Bruno was asleep. Though there were things that his father had hid from Bruno, things that Bruno would never find out for years.
It had hurt the young child that he could do nothing but watch as his father suffered. It made Bruno hate the idea of soulmates. How could the world give you the one but snatch that same person away?
It made him never want to find the one made for him. How could he? He didn’t want to find someone that made him feel like he was in heaven only to have them gone the next second. Why was life such a cruel game? Can’t it just let them enjoy soulmates in peace? Why must they go so abruptly?
He grew up, detesting the red string on his finger. He never looked at his finger unless he had to. Kids at school loved the idea of a soulmate, all but him. Some were upset that they did not have a soulmate but in Bruno’s eyes, they were blessed with a life free from suffering. Bruno would be lying if he said he never once thought of how his soulmate would feel if they knew what Bruno thought of their fate. Just how important romance was to people? Bruno felt as though he would be perfectly fine with spending the rest of his life alone. Who needed a soulmate when he had himself?
As the years went, Bruno’s ideals stayed firm. He watched as people mourned the death of the love they yearned for as their soulmate turned out to be different from their expectations. Some were the complete opposite. Now they have to learn to get along because they were supposed to spend the rest of their lives together. Bruno grew up, watching as the people did their best to change for their soulmates, to grow the love they have, and to enjoy each other’s presence.
He grew up, watching as people did whatever that was possible so long as they could be loved. He watched as slowly but surely, soulmates who hated each other slowly began to fall in love. Perhaps the line between hatred and love got blurred and they stepped over it, falling for each other’s imperfections. Was that what love was supposed to be? Accepting each other no matter what came in between them?
The young Bruno who detested the idea of soulmates slowly grew into a young, fine man. His ideals still remained in a part of his brain which he had slowly forgotten. He had watched as other people lived their happy life with their other half. Maybe love wasn’t so bad? But he had also witnessed his father’s miserable years after the death of his mother. It had him torn in between his opinions.
His father had grown sickly over the years. Love sick perhaps, but he was getting weaker and weaker as the seconds ticked by. Bruno could only watch as the man who did his best to give him a stable childhood rot away in a hospital bed. It had caused an ache in his heart. Bruno did all he could to pay for the medical bills, which was causing such a weight on the young man’s shoulders that his father just couldn’t bear to witness. The love of his life might be gone, but he still had love to give to his son.
“Bruno,” he began. It was a warm sunday afternoon when Bruno once again visited his dear father. “It’s fine. I can’t see you like this.”
The effect it had on Bruno was evident on his face. His eye bags were heavy, he was skinnier than before. But he didn’t look as bad as his father, who was gaunt and could barely find the energy to speak sometimes.
“It’s alright,” Bruno reassured his father. “You raised me. This is the least I could do.”
His father gently shook his head, “You have many more years than I do. I don’t want you to waste your time on a pathetic old man like me. I’ll have to see your mum soon, and how do you think she would react to you overworking yourself?” He laughed, though the atmosphere was anything but humorous.
Bruno's fists clenched as his father spoke. The man he cared about speaking of himself in that way hurt Bruno. He knew his father wanted the best for him but Bruno wanted the best for his father as well.
“Please, don’t speak of yourself that way,” Bruno replied. “You’ll live. You’ll see me live the life you want me to.”
The old man smiled a weak smile as he looked at his son square in the face, “You both know that I won’t. Promise me that you’ll go look for your soulmate and experience the love you’ve always dreamed of, alright?” The fragile man choked on his words, his voice cracking half way through as tears collected in his eyes. His son stared, unable to speak. His son’s face remained stoic but his fists spoke of another story.
Bruno could only nod. It was his father’s final request, how could he deny it?
As the next morning arose to reveal a beautiful sunset, a view ever so breathtaking that one would kill for, Bruno’s father had passed away. It wasn’t out of the blue. The man had been ill for a while and Bruno had always known deep down that medication wasn’t doing all that much to delay it.
It didn’t make it any easier for the young man, who was only 20. Death had never been easy for the young man. Not when he was a child, and not when he was an adult.
The funeral was small, quiet. Very few people came and went. His father was a fisherman. His family lived a quiet life. Only people of the village came to offer their condolences. No amount of condolences could bring back his father however, but he appreciated the gesture nonetheless.
The days passed by, the words of his father’s final request lingered in his mind. Should he really look for his soulmate? What kind of love does he want? What kind of love had Bruno been yearning for? All he knew was his detest for the romantic side of life. But he wanted to honour his father.
He stared at the red string on his pinky, the one he had ignored for years. He watched as the string led out of the door, towards someone he had never known. He wondered why hadn’t his soulmate looked for him, were they busy? Or did they share the same idea about love that he did? Would it really be worth a shot to try?
He looked out the window, and towards where the string led to. His curiosity kept lingering in his mind. Maybe he really should just look for his soulmate. Perhaps they could get through this together, help Bruno figure out his views on love. After all, what harm could it really cause? He wasn’t the biggest fan of love, but having someone who could understand you couldn’t hurt all that bad right? He didn’t have to be in a relationship with his soulmate right away, they could just get to know each other and decide if their pacing was alright with each other.
Bruno took a few days to really begin his search. A part of him kept changing his mind, but eventually, he got around to it. It had been two months since the death of his father. It was time to really fulfill the final request of his loved ones. His father did not want to see him die a lonely, miserable man like he was. Bruno did not want to disappoint his father either, so here he was, setting out and looking for a soulmate, in hopes that he would get a companion and maybe for the first time in many years, feel the love others with soulmates often received.
He walked, followed the trail of the red string. It led him to the city of Naples. So his soulmate had always been a city person. He wondered how would the son of a fisherman and someone who lived in the city get along with each other. It seemed like an interesting match up. They were two different people from two different worlds.
He continued walking until he arrived at the poorer side of the city. Perhaps his soulmate wasn’t as luxurious as he had thought when he first entered the city. As he arrived in the neighbourhood, a young blonde teenage boy stepped out of his home and came face to face with Bruno. The boy took one look at Bruno and knew he didn’t belong in the area.
“Looking for places to sell more of your drugs?” The young boy began, “This place is already ruined enough.”
Bruno shook his head, “I’m just looking for someone,” he responded. He appeared slightly annoyed at the boy who had just lashed out at him for no reason. He just assumed that Bruno was a drug dealer for no apparent reason.
The young boy frowned. “ Soulmate I’m guessing? Where does your string lead to? My apologies for lashing out.”
“It’s alright,” Bruno replied. “Uh… my strings lead towards…” Bruno paused as he glanced over at his pinky, leading towards the left and into an apartment just two houses away. Bruno pointed the house to the young teenage boy who then turned to Bruno in shock.
“Your soulmate is Leone Abbacchio?” He said, “I haven’t seen him in days!”
The two made their way towards the house, where a putrid smell escaped from the cracks of the door. “The Abbacchios are pretty messy,” said the boy. “It’s normal for their house to smell but this smell is extra horrid.”
Bruno covered his nose, but even that didn’t stop the smell from entering his nose. He wondered what kind of life his soulmate had lived to end up like this. He wondered if the two of them could even live the life he had envisioned. It suddenly all looked like a far fetched dream. The smell kept hitting his nostrils every second. He felt as though he could throw up any moment. He knocked on the door gently.
No response.
The boy frowned as he mentioned that Leone usually answered the door. His parents had died a month ago and left him alone. The young boy had younger siblings in the foster care system while he lived with his drug addict parents. His younger siblings weren’t even teenagers, while Leone himself was an adult. They were only sent to foster care two months prior when someone had lodged a complaint against the family.
Bruno knocked once again but no response. Perhaps Leone was sleeping? The boy decided to try the doorknob, which was open. Bruno didn’t want to creep in as he was a mere stranger to the man who was supposed to be his soulmate. The boy stepped in first, into the dark house. He fumbled around the walls for the light switch, and the moment it was turned on, a horror scene welcomed their unexpecting souls.
There Leone Abbacchio lay on the ground, foaming at the mouth with maggots crawling about his dead body. He had been dead for days. Bruno watched as the red string from his pinky trailed towards the dead man and ended right at the dead man’s own pinky.
Why was life so cruel to him?
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annnnperkins · 1 year
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(excuse the mess) room reveal but why does it look kind of cosy like i know it’s an absolute mess but also it looks lived in and idk
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selfnss · 10 months
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fingers trace over the faint outline of runes that have burned into chuuya's forearm. " what does it feel like? " dazai asks softly. what does he force chuuya to do to himself?
the silence is everything chuuya had hoped it would be. the safety from twisting and writhing static that presses against the inside of his skull over and over again as it sharpens everything he is and everything he knows. it chips away at him, day and night. chuuya thought he'd get used to it by now - like it's nothing but white noise. but the only time he's truly free of the god's enraged screams is when he's blind to the world and burning up from the inside out. the only time he feels like himself is when he's hanging in the air above everything else, eyes blank and mind tucked away elsewhere beneath the raging inferno woven into his flesh.
but, that silence comes with another noise - just as loud as the static before it but this is far more... grounded. far more human, he supposes. dazai's heart beat is steady beneath his ear where chuuya lay pressed against his partner's chest, eyes half lidded as he lets the familiar pulse permeate him and soothe the ragged edges that make up most of the executive's being.
then, there's a voice. soft and barely there but one that chuuya could hear over the world ending, if he had to. one that chuuya has heard time and time again as it takes hold and pulls him from beneath the surface of rage and incoherent violence incarnate. mismatched gaze focuses to find fingertips tracing puckered flesh sat just in the crook of his elbow and only then does the question fully process in chuuya's glaringly peaceful mind.
he could sugar-coat it, like every other time chuuya's been asked something similar by someone else unable to give him this peace and quiet. someone else unable to earn the bone-deep trust that he has for his partner. but then, dazai would know he's avoiding the truth - the asshole would know it without even having to think about it... and, well, chuuya doesn't want to lie to him of all people. osamu deserves that much. so, he shifts, pressing himself in closer to his partner's flank and feigning a sigh of disdain - as if he thinks dazai would believe it.
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"like i'm fallin' but i never hit the ground. like i'm weightless but i can't stop risin' away from everythin'. it feels like every bone in my body's breakin' and then mendin' all at the same time, over and over again." he's not sure this helps. probably not, with the analytical way dazai stores everything he learns. still, chuuya lifts his head a little to rest his jaw against his partner's sternum - mind swimming as he tries to put the unthinkable into words. "like i'm drowning and burning alive all at once. like i'm suffocating but i don't need to breathe in the first place. it feels like anger and anguish all rolled into one."
finally, chuuya lifts himself up enough that he can roll over, head resting 'gainst dazai's stomach as he watches those familiar auburn eyes and feels familiar fingers trace his skin. the only person who can show him what humanity is. the only person who can give chuuya his own humanity back. he wonders if dazai knows how dangerous that is. if dazai knows just what chuuya would do for him if he just asked.
"feels like i want saving and ending in the same breath. every part've me tearing at the seams and being pulled apart but also the most... whole i can remember. the most natural state fer somethin' like me." brow furrows and mismatched hues close tight. they're safe here. just the two of them. "feels like everything at once and then nothing at all. nothing but you."
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doshi-sukiru · 1 year
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FUN FACT OF THE DAY
I HAVE A PIXIV ACCOUNT NOW!
I'll be posting nsfw pics there. Remember you have to be 18+ to see them.
Link is here!
I have an early valentine's picture for shadowpeach fans in there if you want to visit it
Have fun!
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adventures-written · 1 year
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💦 (human!connor 😏 )
Wet Dream
Hands touched his skin, seeming to set every inch of it on fire with the want for pleasure. Hank's fingers caressed his chest, a gentle focus given to his nipples. "You're blushing, Detective.." the androids voice echoing in his ears. "And you're teasing..." he accused, his voice hot and ragged with breath. There was a hint of annoyance there, wanting Hank to move.
The android seemed to understand because within seconds, he felt a hand slip into his boxers, the only thing he seemed to be wearing at the moment. Fingers gripped around his arousal and began to stroke him with a gentle touch. It was not quite the rhythm that Connor had been hoping for, but Hank's hand felt good.
Connor made the mistake of making eye contact with Hank, and there was a moment of surprise because the android was just watching him. He found it hard to read the expression he had, but he seemed to be enjoying the pleasured expressions Connor was giving him.
Then his thumb swiped roughly around the head of his arousal, causing Connor to gasp suddenly. His face seeming to melt into one of pleasure. This reaction seemed to please Hank as the one hand continued to stroke him. Careful fingers running along the length of his erection, and that thumb teasing over the head now with each stroke.
Connor's legs felt weak, quivering underneath him as Hank continued to work. He found himself leaning against the android, head resting on his shoulder and his hands gripping at the jacket he wore, trying to keep himself up.
Whether this gave Hank better access or he was taking advantage of the situation, Connor was unsure, but there was a second hand that slipped into the backside of his boxers. Fingers found their way to his entrance and began to play with him, stretching at him carefully. "Hank..!" He gasped, lifting his head slightly as he was alert to the motions one both fronts now.
Fingers carefully worked their way into his entrance, two fingers carefully stretching him. The way Hank was pleasuring him, he felt as if he may cum from just the simple touch. "I'm..gun...nahh..." "Do not cum," the order sent a shiver down Connor's spine, "It is not time, Detective..." There was a soft whine from Connor, who clung tighter to Hank. If he didn't, he most definitely was going to fall over.
"Please, I just want you..."
Startling awake, Connor opened his eyes as he heard his alarm going off. He felt clammy from sweat, his breathing a more ragged than usual. Reaching over, he turned his alarm off on his phone and laid back against the bed, staring at the ceiling for a moment.
It was still dark out, about five in the morning, and Connor could feel all of his own arousal from that dream. He felt conflicted about his own arousal. With a groan, he brought an arm up to cover his eyes, his other hand traveling below the covers to his arousal. "Damn it, Hank..."
He wasn't sure how he was going to face the android today.
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kleiner-ghost · 5 months
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Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Redfall (Video Game) Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Relationships: Jacob Boyer/ Amelia "Addison" Boyer Characters: Jacob Boyer, Amelia "Addison" Boyer, Devinder Crousley, Remi De La Rosa Additional Tags: Wedding, Domestic Fluff, Aged up Amelia, Crack, Non-Canon Relationship, Cursed, In more ways that one, Blood, Depictions of injury, no beta we die like this ship Summary:
When the Hollow Man dies, his daughter is brought back to life. Jacob falls in love with her at first sight, and they get married there and then. Cutesy fluff ensues, or so Jacob is made to think.
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theweeklyblogger · 1 year
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5 Songs That I Think Are The Best & Why I Think So
It is not an easy task to choose five of the greatest songs of all time, but I am more than willing to do so. Introducing the first song in no particular order is Trevor Something's The Ghost.
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Occasionally you just need the right song to listen to in the darkness of your room, and this song delivers just that. This song is hauntingly beautiful due to its synth-wave composition and calm, yet an overall sense of serenity through dark lyrics. With its beautifully executed composition, this song always helps soothe the nerves no matter where you are.
The next song I would like to share would be Think Twice by Dead On A Sunday
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Personally, I think this song is beautifully done. It has a similar sound to Trevor Something, yet has more of a Gothic appeal. As a whole, this song is a good one to listen to when you're driving at night or if you're up at 2 am. Moreover, it has a lingering, dreamlike quality that is sure to stick with you for a while after hearing it.
This next song is a change of pace from the previous songs. However, it truly is a product of its time, Don't You Dare Forget The Sun by Get Scared.
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This song always brings back fun memories of the early 2010s for me, and honestly, that makes it a dear song to me. I've always loved this style of music. Despite being around 10 when the song came out, I would still listen to this song on my iPod hoping my brothers wouldn't hear me listening to it. I may have been a bit too young to be introduced to this song, but I'm sure glad I did. It's been stuck in my head ever since.
The next song I would like to mention is Monster by Skillet, a classic.
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This song I used to hear all the time on the radio when my brother would take me to the ice rink for my lessons or for team practices. This song truly grew on me and is the reason why I came across the previous song. Nevertheless, this is a classic rock song that anyone can enjoy. From the guitar beat to the overall composition, it is just an excellent song overall.
The last song I would like to talk about for the 5 best songs ever would be Square Hammer by Ghost.
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Despite the way the lyrics are so catchy, it doesn't surprise me that this song is just as catchy as the other ones I chose. I could listen to it on repeat for hours. Additionally, the band's visual look enhances the charm of the song. The Ghost music videos tell an interesting story and make you think about the songs. These elements further enhance the song's charm and make it stand out, allowing it to be remembered and have a lasting impression.
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Them! I love characters taking care of each other. One of the rare moments where Alastor relaxes enough not to bite Lucifer's hands of xD
Also Little follow up comic:
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And my sister pointed out that if Alastor actually walked away Lucifer would beg for forgiveness alskdfjakl;sdfjlk;saj;ldf
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ymisodramatic · 1 year
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January 17, 2023
I thought it was done.
I told you to go, and away you went. Without a fight, without a trace.
I thought you would care, I thought it would hurt.
I really thought I would matter.
You came back again. I let you in. I thought you changed. You didn't. You knew what you were doing.
You thought you were smart, that you could hide it from me. But I'll always find out, and it will always hurt.
I told you to go. I was done.
I did good for a while. I was alone again. I felt like myself, I was finally ok.
But you can never stay away, because you always come back.
I had to talk to you, I couldn't avoid it. You took advantage and let yourself in again.
I thought I locked the door, I made sure to throw away the key. I never expected you to find an open window and use it to climb back in.
And the cycle repeats, over and over again. I didn't want to let you in.
How did you get back in?
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articulateimposter · 1 year
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I had been looking forward to this. The storm was raging outside my window, the first big thunderstorm of the summer, quite late in the year but welcome nonetheless. I had always loved the feeling of sitting in a comfy chair with a cup of hot chocolate or tea, reading a book while listening to the rain pound on the ceiling. A year ago, when I was still settling into my own home, my own life, and my own identity in this new town, I had many days like this. And I looked forward to them every time the forecast called for a storm. The way it made you feel alive at every flash of lightning through the trees, the force of nature so apparent and beautiful. I had been looking forward to it this year; in the spring I got giddy at the thought of having someone to share the moment with. Of having someone to curl up next to as the thunder boomed, to rent a scary movie and laugh at the bad acting, to create new stormy day traditions. I had been looking forward to it. But as the rain slapped against the window pane and the power went out from a tree falling on a nearby power line, all I could do was sit on the floor, staring at the door. Waiting for someone to show who would never show again. I had been looking forward to this, but now it was dark. And I was alone. 
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morgana-ren · 7 months
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i love angst, and i love your writing, but please, PLEASE, i beg you, could you write some hope of tav ever returning now that the imbecile, has realised the error of his ways 🥺😭 (either way, thank you so much, for all your astarion writtings, it has made me feel things, the angst is real and my masochistic heart loves it🥲)
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First part of the story HERE
Common complaint I got on that one! So I fixed it just for y'all. This ending is much less sad and much more sappy, so here is the comfort you need after all that angst!
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"Darling, will you smile for me? Just once more. Please--"
He feels her cheeks in his palms, the soft skin against his battle-hardened callouses. Desperation cradles his unbeating heart, and for a moment, the emotion is far too much. A searing flame after centuries of frost. A bonfire in a blizzard. It hurts-- it burns--
"My love, I just need you to--"
"Anything my lord, anything at all for you. Simply command me and I will do anything you ask."
"No, I can't-- I-- I won't do it. I won't. I won't!"
"My lord?"
Her head cocks, turning slowly to look upon him, but her eyes-- they are empty; beetle-black and hollow. Her smile is uncanny as a painted doll, her movements disjointed and inhuman. Her teeth are stained crimson with blood, dripping, dripping, ever dripping down, never swallowed, only pooling.
She is light as a feather as she slips away from him, her skin marbling into a sickly gray before ash spreads across her body as a disease, smearing her form into nothingness. Only her face is left untouched, pretty as porcelain, unflinching and unfalling save a small crack that splinters down from her forehead down to her eyes, revealing inky black abyss beneath.
"My lord-- Oh, my tender, vicious lord. I can feel your anguish-- your hunger. Devour me to be whole once more--"
Her blood smells of rot and she--
She is too far gone to save. Too far gone to ever be saved.
"I won't!"
Whirlwind. Pain. Confusion and dread and seeping anguish. A maelstrom of rage and all-consuming despair swelling from within his soul—
—his soul?
The world around him falls away, a wicked tornado thrashing him about, his mind howling in the eternal winds--
And suddenly he is in a chair.
Not a throne. A chair— and a rather uncomfortable one at that.
"What in the hells—"
His vision spins, nausea curling his gut into a wicked tide of sickness barely restrained by his teeth. He tastes stale blood crawling up his throat, threatening to overturn onto the faded rug beneath him.
"Did you see what you wished for, little spawn?"
The voice takes him by surprise. It is not hers, but another, less familiar voice. The wailing animal in his head retreats to a dull roar as his memory creeps back. A brightly colored tent assaults his vision, piecemeal rugs and odd, foreign trinkets abound on makeshift shelves, and before him sits a strange old woman, hood pulled heavy over her straggling gray hair.
"I-- What was that?"
He sees her cracked, aging lips upturn, gnarled hands placed protectively over a strange orb on the table touching his knees. "I have shown you your future, vampling. Was it to your liking?" Panic rises within his stomach again, and though he does not breathe, he clutches his chest. The smell of incense clogs his nostrils and again, the wave of sick threatens to spill forth. Wretched taste of metallic, aged blood sits heavy on his tongue, all sensation too much-- all of it too much.
"No-- No, that cannot be it!"
"This is your path, Pale Elf. The road you walk. The power you seek is well within your grasp, but as I told you before, it will cost you everything."
He vehemently shakes his head, denying it. Denying it before her and all the Gods.
"You told me upon entry that no price was too great for your reward. Do you still agree with this sentiment?"
"No! Not-- not her. Not her. Not that! I couldn't--"
"You can and you shall, sure as the moon follows the sun. You will have everything you ever wanted, but cost of this ritual is plain before you. You cared not for the many souls left to your mercy that are crushed beneath your tyrannical fist in your ascension, but what of the sole one that resides in your heart?"
Her. The light of his life. The air he breathes. The sun on his frigid flesh, the warmth that melts his icy heart.
"No," He hisses, trying to stand, but ultimately unable to muster the strength. "I won't! There-- There must be another way. Show me!"
"There is no other way," She says, solemnly. "It is inevitable."
He swallows down the information like a boulder lodged in his gullet. Her words echo endlessly in his mind, bouncing off the walls and lodging shards of ice directly in his soul.
"What if I-- What if I don't ascend? Tell me, what if I don't?"
She smiles again, teeth flashing through her thin lips. "That is another path, little elf." "I need to know. I-- I need certainty. I won't do this to her, but I--" He pauses, grappling with everything in his mind, desperately flitting about to absorb it all. "If I am going to forgo this, I need to be certain. I need to know that I can protect her, that she will be safe--"
But the woman simply shakes her head.
"Everyone must choose. For some, the path is dark, but for you, you see more than most will ever have the comfort of knowing. I can offer you nothing more. Should you initiate the Rite, you know this will come to pass. I can tell you nothing more if you choose to not. The future is yet unwritten, and the quill resides in your hands." "Then why can I not have both!" He slams a fist on the table, clawing at the soft wood. For the first time in ages, tears prick at his pale lashes and frustration wells a knot in his throat. "Why--" "Because one path is wholly your own, while the other is a tangled web, such is the nature of deals with the Hells. You will get everything you ever wanted and lose everything that made it worth having."
His head slumps, defeated and miserable. Silvery tears slide down the curves of his cheeks, even as he attempts to bite them back. He thought he would find comfort in knowing the future, but all it has given him is utter horror.
"Despair not," She continues. "Yes, you will wither under the sun, an eternally cursed dweller of the night, but all is not lost, is it? The one you love, will she stray from your side?" "I wanted her to have better than that," He sniffles, needling his lip with a fang. "I cannot brave the sun, but her-- She deserves better than that-- better than me."
"And what of what she feels?"
His brows furrow, and he peers up at the woman from tear-beaded lashes.
"You are a night walker; it is in your nature to be selfish. But love is not selfish, little vampling. You must fight your nature, your inherent self-loathing, or your love will always find the fire. What of what she desires?"
"She loves me," He says with absolute certainty. "And I--" "Do you love her?"
"Yes," He hisses, almost insulted that she would ask. "More than anything. I'm here, aren't I?"
"Then the rest matters naught. If you love her, you will allow her the agency to choose-- something you deny her as an ascendent. You must grow past your own follies. To love is to be vulnerable, and you must allow both yourself and her this freedom."
They are hard words to swallow, and yet, he feels the truth resound in them. She would not leave his side, even as he tried to force her to understand. Even as an instrument of his manipulation and schemes came to light, she stood steadfast with him, hand entwined in his, ready to face the fire together.
"I-- I need to know she will be safe."
Again, the woman shakes her head. "You cannot. You must fight fate if you wish to overturn it. You face dire odds, though throwing the dice in your favor now will doom you later should this outcome be the confirmation of your fears."
He sighs, face crinkling as he sniffs once more, summoning the willpower to swallow down the agony of his choice. He finds the strength in his legs to push himself upward from the chair, weak and shaking as a newborn fawn as he does so. "I will do whatever I need to. Anything."
"Then you may yet see this through."
He can hear the fanfare of the circus outside, the bawdy bards strumming away on their lutes and banging on drums, the elated screams of the children and their parents. Facing the light now seems impossible, but he must find his way home to her-- he has to be with her now now now--
"The coin first, boy."
He snaps out of his delirium only long enough to fish his hands into one of his pockets, bringing out a coin. Aged and neglected, the sinister engraving of a skull peers up at him from his palm, ruby eyes gleaming in the light as he tosses it into the woman's knobbily-jointed hands.
"Best of luck to you, night-child," She tucks it away. "We may yet meet again." "No offense, but I hope not."
"Me too, Little Star."
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He pays little mind to the bustling streets and bursting taverns of Baldur's Gate, his feet carrying him back to camp as swiftly as his body will allow. It takes him until sundown even as he damn near jobs, ripping through the tree line and into the ruins with the intensity of a man starved.
"Astarion!" Karlach greets him, trying to wave him over. "I've got a bet with Gale about--" "Where is she?" Astarion immediately cuts her off, looking around frantically.
"Who?" Karlach raises a brow.
"Who else?" Wyll crosses his arms, looking intrigued at Astarion's intensity.
"Oh! In her tent, I think. Why? Gotcha a special something' in town for her, eh?" Karlach tries to rib at him, but he pushes past her without a second glance.
"Bet it's a fancy new dress he needs to tear off of her immediately," Karlach rolls her eyes before returning to her business.
He bursts into her tent to find her hunched over a book, tongue poking from between her teeth, as she scans over the page. This only lasts a few seconds before he scrambles onto the bed, squeezing her as tightly as he can manage, burying his nose into her hair, tears brimming in his eyes once more.
"Woah, hey!" She laughs, carefully setting her book aside, trying to discern what in the hells he is mumbling endlessly into her neck.
Need you-- need you-- love you-- can't lose you-- don't ever--
She hushes him, realizing something has gone terribly, terribly wrong, kissing his head and tugging him close. "Hey, what's wrong?"
She tries to cup his cheeks and bring his face up but he adamantly refuses, hard-swallowing the urge to bawl into her shoulder with every ounce of willpower he has. All he can manage is to cling to her, half sobbing, visions of that terrible future swimming in his head. He cannot let it come to pass, he will not--
And she holds him, cradling him in her arms, hushing him gently. Her face creases with worry, running her hands through his silvery hair as he pulls him into her lap.
"Little Star, what's wrong? You seem so upset. What can I do to make you happy, my love?"
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"Is it done?" Ulma leans down as she enters the tent, carefully dodging the intricate tassels of the blanket strewn over the entryway.
"It is," The strange old woman replies, still rubbing the coin with her worn thumb.
"And?"
"I showed him nothing but truth," She says quietly. "I did not manipulate his vision. Only channeled it."
"That tells me nothing. I need to know if our children are safe."
"I cannot tell you this, Ulma. You know of the ways of our tribe; our relationship with these magics." Ulma's lips purse, her exasperation evident in her humorless expression. "I need to know--"
"His reaction was genuine. That was not my doing. He knows the price of power. I cannot tell you if he will pay it regardless," The old woman's head lifts, a slight mischievous smile playing on her lips. "But I can tell you what I think."
"And what do you think?"
"I have seen his soul-- the heart of it. I believe you will see our children yet. He will spare our heart to spare his own in kind. It beats in that woman," Her eyes twinkle in the low candlelight, a genuine smile widening across her cheeks. "I believe he can find redemption yet."
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laulo821 · 7 months
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do you think spirits dream of heaven
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OMG SAW UR ASKS WERE OPEN AND I RAN SO FAST HFJDJSBS
Anyways ok so imagine *trips over my own feet* imagine uhm baking cookies *stumbling* baking cookies with Lilia:3
No pressure ofc! I hope u will enjoy writing this if u do! And make sure to drink after and take care of urself!
Flour Belongs In The Cookies; Lilia Vanrouge
Content; Gender-neutral reader, fluff, some pining
Word Count; 650+
Author's Note; Cloudy, you do know how bad his cooking is, right? Besides that, I hope you enjoy what I did with this little prompt!
As a reminder, do not put my work — or others for that matter — into AI as it steals. Link to Masterlist
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You knew full well going into this that Lilia … wasn’t the best person to leave around food. Well, you didn’t know to the full extent how ‘bad’, ‘revolting’, and ‘utterly cursed’ he was according to his dormmates (and adoptive family? Still trying to wrap your head around that one, to be honest). 
Yet, as you were both adding ingredients to the batch of cookies you were making, he had done nothing to tamper with the recipe or mess up by accident. Perhaps Silver, Sebek and Malleus were just overexaggerating it? Lilia has been completely fine, a great helper even! 
“So,” you cleared your throat, breaking the quiet (which was both comfortable yet awkward). “Why did you want to bake cookies with me? Not that I mind, just curious is all.”
Lilia looked up from the wet and dry ingredients he was combining and offered you a cheeky smile with a wink. “Hmm, do I need a reason to do so,” he breathed with a silent chuckle, sneaking some of the raw dough into his mouth.
You tutted, taking the bowl away from him. “I don’t need you getting sick from eating that now–”
But your attempt at lecturing was silenced by a small puff of flour being slapped gently on your cheek; a white handprint now on it. “RUDE!”
Lilia was having a good old laugh, from either getting flour on you, the shocked expression on your face, or a combination of the two (knowing him, it was bound to be the last one). He was actually getting pink in the face because of it; was he even taking breaks from laughing to breathe???
“Ah, lighten up! Plus,” he paused and covered your hand in flour and gently slapped it on his cheek, “there, we match now.” 
His magenta eyes were twinkling with mischief and you found yourself gently shaking your head and chuckling. Sighing, you picked up some flour with your hands and made it look like you were just going to cover the countertop with it, but you swerved, and slapped it into Lilia’s hair.
Lilia coughed, and rubbed at his eyes, trying to get the flour out of his eyes, but once he opened them again, you were gone. So we’re playing games now? But he just wheezed in delight and gave chase, a cup full of flour on hand so he could repay the favour. After all, since you both had matching handprints on your cheeks, you deserved to be bestowed some flour on your head.
“And here you were saying it was rude of me for that first move,” he called out into the dorm. They couldn’t have gotten far now.
He heard the curtains ruffle, and he floated over, not making a sound.
Peaking oh so carefully behind the curtains, he spotted you, silently giggling to yourself. And that’s when he made his move.
“Found you!~” And he sprinkled the flour over your head; much more gently than you did to him.
You groaned, knowing it would take a bit to get the flour out from everything… but the way Lilia floated overhead made it look like he was sprinkling snow… was he always this pretty? Even with him covered in flour, you still felt your heart flutter.
You mentally slapped your cheeks though, and got yourself up. 
“Guess you did… but that was fun,” you chuckled, dusting yourself off to the best of your ability.
The moment though was ruined by your smoke alarm going off; it was a wonder that those even worked, but hey, at least they worked.
Rushing to the kitchen, you opened up the oven to have a mass of black smoke smelling of burnt food of some sort enveloping the both of you.
“What happened?!” You coughed out, trying to open up the windows and doors to let out the smoke.
Lilia grimaced, “Ah… perhaps I set the oven too high.”
And even though you had fun making the now coal-like cookies, perhaps store-bought would have been better…
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Tags; @afunkyfreshblog @eynnwwyjth @identity-theft-101 @ithseem @lucid-stories @ryker-writes @twistwonderlanddevotee @xxoomiii
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