#enough i have a headache i don’t wanna talk anymore. that’s literally it ... no i wish my family members just had normal fucking ways of

[kdipshit]

Hard Knock Life ;

I’ve spent years trying to weed through this mess in my head, but it’s getting so clean now, It’s like the cord of thoughts in my brain was hiding some pretty cool stuff under it, pretty dope realisations. Yanno I didn’t go outside and run or walk or workout because my mum would laugh at the people who did that. I wouldn’t speak up because my mother would judge those who did. How can I say this without sounding like I’m an ungrateful daughter who doesn’t like her mum, that’s not true, that the furthest thing from the truth. I love my mother and I don’t blame her, I don’t even think I knew enough to even piece it all together. I feel like im making no sense, but im trying to read this damn chord but it’s hard. I feel like right now, im actually sick so maybe it’s the best time to talk about the rotten seeds imbedded in my brain, I’ve got a headache, im nauseous as fuck, im kinda high a little bit so im not in as much pain, my headaches aren’t fkn normal they’re fat fkn migraines that effects my neck, eye, temple, shoulder, jaw, sometimes it makes my teeth hurt or like they’re falling out lol, it’s pain I can’t open my eyes my vision goes black it’s so dramatic and so fitting for a BPD bitch lmao.

Anyways, I think that convo was getting a little like fucked up so I needed to get my mind off it, idk man I feel like I’m just rambling, I’m thinking too much about the reader and not shifting my attention back to just writing.

I have an appointment with my drug & alcohol Therapist tomorrow and like ugh. I’m feeling sick so it automatically makes me not want to go, she has only asked me of one thing, and that’s to sort my licence out, and do you think I’ve done that? No I haven’t done that, because idk why. I forgot. Like idk why I didn’t go do my licence, I guess I don’t fucking care that much. I don’t feel good today mannn, but I did still do my morning routine, most of it, which just consists on me cleaning my room, making my bed, putting music on and taking my meds lol, I’m back in bed now, but I still feel good and super grateful because my room is clean, my meds are taken, and I don’t really have to worry about anything else until a little later, I’ve given myself the space to chill, which I need sick she’s a sick girl. Oh yeah I applied for a job yesterday like full on went into the shop and handed my resume. I’m excited for the response. Sick of waiting for this other bullshit job, hours are better and it’s closer than my old job and my old job was literally 1km away.

I feel like my mum dropped me, not like physically, but she dropped her association with me when I was like 13-14 she kind of gave up on me and just let me run wild in my own brain, with no help or direction on where to go. She didn’t wanna talk to me about anything, she didn’t wanna hear anything from me, she didn’t care how I felt, what was going on at school, she didn’t care about me, or didn’t make it feel like she did, so I got a boyfriend who I became extremely codependent towards. My mum ignored me, for years, and didn’t talk to me unless we got drunk together, for years, I’m talking like 10 years she left me alone, it was awkward to talk to her, it was horrible, I missed a ghost it felt like, I missed her but I didn’t even know her.

Y’all I know I said goodbye but I’m soul tied to this man. I can’t let him go and I’m a freak for holding on still, thats how I feel, the last thing he said to me was how beautiful I am, and how much he loves me, so why is it so fucking horrible. Why does this feel so horrible, I shouldn’t reach out, thats not what I should do. Not anymore, I make myself look like an idiot, and all these thoughts are just so silly to me. But I miss him, and I don’t know if its because he’s my favourite person, or because he’s the only person to ever get that closet me… like he knows me in a way no one else can, I wouldn’t let them anyway…. I landed a job interview with a company I’m really enjoying, I don’t want to go because its a far journey, and its all too new, I just wish I had ‘him to talk to right now. I just wanna talk. It always turns into an argument, I miss him. ha. I do, I miss him, I still see him everywhere, I see him in me, I see him in everyone, and all the songs that are playing are song I was singing when we were together, yang, all that r&b shit, wee belong together by Mariah Carey just started playing, like, fuck off. Am I not tormented enough? I cant see myself with anyone else, and if that means I’m single forever then I’ve accepted that, and I’m okay with that, no one compares to my first love. And I’m not sick and tired anymore, I’m okay with that, I can understand that, and I’m okay. I guess he’s just a character that lives in my head, and thats the only way I can make peace with not being with him. Maybe he doesn’t even exist? Maybe he’s in a happy relationship, maybe I don’t even love him and I’m just in a mood swing, maybe im in love with someone else, maybe I’m in love with someone I can’t be with BECAUSE I can’t be with them, maybe I’m meant to be with someone else. Idk. Because I have loved after him, and some even more intense than my favourite person, but with my FP, I just don’t know….. I’m bound. Not for too much longer now… surely. I am so ready to let this go, soooooo ready. Omg, I still have his ring in my draw I gave him as a promise ring, he got me one swell, I know we were so married, anyways I still have his ring. Idk where it is but I know its hidden somewhere, that ring is my goodbye. I’ve always known it thats why I kept it. Just like I kept my goodbye from him for so long. The ultimate disrespect to myself. I was open for him for this long, my very first love, my first everything, it was 100% a relationship that was more grown than we were, way more grown. we were acting and living like we were so much older than we were. We were pretty locked in. And it was okay with me because I was following in my parents footsteps, young love, the seriousness, all the ugly. I accepted it all, and I loved all of him, for everything he was inside and out. ill always have love stored away somewhere for him, but choppitty chop chop Jesus Christ its HURTINGGGGGG MEEEEEEE. How??! gahh damnnn I’m tryinggg….. why don’t you fucking do it lmaooo, okay okay okay your right. Were gonna do it together girlie, aswell as let go of the anger I have towards my mother, since it all came out at the same time. Ugh, my counsellor told me to be honest tho so I am. I’m so much stronger than this, holding onto all of this bull fucking shit. I don’t need to hold onto anything, at all. The only thing that exist is this moment right now, thats it and thats all. Consciousness feels pretty trippy btw. Idk why I said that, I think I went into the void of the moment, lmao. Its good to not have to think or feel for use a little bit, everything disappears. All my problems leave, all my overthinking.

He kept me in line, and told me off, he guided me, he helped me, he loved me he cared for me. I can do all of that myself. If its really that, that I want. I guess I’m lonely, and he’s the only other person who can cure that for me. I feel a sensation of completeness when I’m talking to him, no matter the topic, or argument. I forgive him, and I let him go, please.

I love all my ex’s lol, not gonna lie, they all made me so crazy for them, all my ex FP’s , LMFAO, no one does it better, I wanna say I miss having a FP but I don’t, except for that one fkn FP that won’t loosen its grip on my mind, I’ve learned to live with him, its peaceful sometimes, but its still a fucking parasite. I’ve also decided I’m not going to take that job with that cool company in the city, its too far, ill keep an eye out for the other job I wrote a whole cover letter for. The universe has given me options and I am so thankful for that. Thank you thank you thank you. For everything, for it all <3 I was trying to whack the weeds out without looking at them in the eye, how rude.

#blogging #new blog #mental health #actually bipolar #actually borderline #mental instability #actually bpd #original post #original writing #original words

[roxiestranger19]

The Laundromat

(a little thing i wrote using made up characters- inspired by all the gym girlies on my feed)

The bell rang and my eyes shot up from my dark corner of the floor, lit only by the Walmart sign across the road, to see none other than Reid Parker walk through the door. When Taylor said I could come in after the closing time to do my laundry, I assumed I would be the only one here but apparently not.

“‘Sup dude, Taylor let you in too?” Reid asks. I roll my eyes so far in the back of my head that I think I gave myself a headache.

“Yeah, he did. I thought I had exclusive access.” 

“Oh, it’s you.” He opens a washer and dumps in way too many clothes. “How do you know him?”

“The gym.”

“You go to the gym?” He asks.

“Yes, I do, actually.” I smile sarcastically and go back to my phone. 

“Okay, geez,” He closes the lid and leans against the machine. “Maybe if you wore anything other than baggy sweatshirts and sweatpants I’d be able to tell.”

“Yeah, I dont wear clothes to please men so, sorry to disappoint.” He clicks his tongue.

“Did your girlfriend break up with you or something?” I glare at him with murder behind my eyes. What did he just say?

“First of all, I'm straight, and second, I don’t remember asking for your opinion.” He looks a bit stunned and I eternally praise myself for my amazing comeback. 

“Ain’t no way you’re straight.” 

“Why are you questioning my own sexuality?” I ask.

“Because literally everyone thinks you’re a lesbian.” I think he thought that that would surprise me but I’ve been told that I’m gay since eighth grade and Ive given up on correcting people, except for this time. I dont mind being compared to lesbians. I'm ashamed to be attracted to men.

“Okay, and?” 

“Doesn’t that bother you?” He asks. 

“Not really.” I go back to scrolling through TikTok.

“Then why do you dress like a guy?” I throw my head back and groan.

“Why do you care?”

“Because. Don’t you wanna show off all your hard work?” 

“I don't, actually,” I say.

“I’m just saying.” He turns around and unscrews the detergent lid, “If I went to the gym enough to know Taylor, which I do, I’d show off.” I cringe at the excessive amount of detergent he pours on top of the mountain of clothes. 

“I'm not an attention seeker like you are.” I glance up at him. 

“Being proud of yourself is different than doing it for attention.” He lets the lid fall closed, creating a loud bang that resonates through the empty Laundromat. 

“Whatever,” I mumble. I don't want to talk to him anymore. There have been a few times where I want to literally flex on everyone, show the people what I do five times a week, but I haven't worn short sleeves in almost three years. Besides my ex, Isaac, no one has seen my arms. I don't know why I make it such a big deal. I got nothing but compliments from him. If I didn't care from the beginning then I wouldn’t have anything to be scared of now. I blame it on not wanting the attention or experiencing the terrible feeling of everyone looking at me, but I think it’s starting to become deeper than that. I check my timer and there’s still twenty minutes left. Reid has been counting coins for way too long and I think I saw him squinting to see the numbers engraved on a coin that I can tell is a quarter from all the way across the room. He finally puts it in the machine and sits on top of it. 

“So what brings you here at this fine hour?” he asks. While slightly less annoyed now that I've had a few moments of silence, his presence still irks me. 

“Peace and quiet and no ones gonna throw out my shit to put theirs in,” I say. 

“Those people are the worst.” He’s definitely one of those people. “So…,” he looks around, “the whole gym thing.”

“No more questions.” 

“What’s your squat PR?”

“I’m not doing this.”

“Whatever, mine's definitely higher,” he brags. Oh, please. His ass is way flatter than mine.

“I dont care.” I dig around for my headphones and put them on, a universal sign that I do not want to talk. I turn on my Rihanna playlist and close my eyes. One minute into “Pon de Replay” I feel something hard hit my face. “What the fuck!” I yell, pulling my headphones off. A penny. Reid threw a penny directly at my forehead and doesnt look in the least bit sorry.

“I'm bored,” he smirks.

“How the hell is that my problem?” I throw the penny back at him but it hits the washer instead and flies in an unknown direction.

“Excellent aim.”

“Shut up.” I put my headphones back on and watch him slide off the washer. His mouth is moving but I can't hear a word he’s saying. “I can’t hear you!” I yell, closing my eyes. Just as I think he has given up I have the feeling that I'm being watched. I slowly open my eyes to find him standing right in front of me, scaring me shitless. “Jesus Christ!” I clutch my heart. He’s bent over laughing. I take my headphones off again. 

“I was standing there for a solid minute before you noticed,” he says breathlessly.

“Stop laughing at me.”

“Only if you do something for me.” I can see the gears turning in his head. 

“Do you not have a phone or something else to entertain yourself with?” 

“Nope.” He sits down criss crossed. God this man is a child. My ten year old cousin is less annoying.

“Well stop harassing me.” I put my headphones back in my bag. 

“What are you going to do about it?” He challenges. I dont have the energy to do anything and I don't know what he wants from me.

“I'll do anything that will make you leave me alone.” I immediately regret what I just said. 

“Anything?” His eyebrows raise.

“No, not anything. Just, what do you want?” He faces me head on and looks me dead in the eye.

“I want you to take off your clothes and post a picture of yourself without wearing that hoodie.” I feel my face heat up and I'm grateful that neither of us bothered to turn the lights on when we came in. I shake my head.  

“Absolutely not.” 

“Why?” 

“Because I haven’t posted on my instagram since freshman year of high school and im not undressing in front of you,” I say. He scoffs.

“Isn’t your account private? Barely any people would see plus, I can’t see shit in here.”

“The point is, I'm not doing it.” I can’t believe he would even ask me to do that. It may not be a big deal to other people but it is to me. Thirst traps are embarrassing and he can definitely still see shapes in here which is already more than what I want him to see. He rolls his eyes.

“Are you embarrassed or something?” he asks. 

“What? No!” I’m not. My body is the thing I'm most proud of and I want to keep it to myself. 

“Then what is going on?” I breathe in deeply.

“I just don't want to post the pictures.”

“So you’d do it?” He perks up.

“No!”

“C’mon please?” he begs. 

“No means no.” He groans dramatically, dragging his hands down his face.  

“Don’t give me that. What if I did something for you?” My interest is peaked.

“Like what?”

“I’ll get Taylor to lower your membership cost,” he says. That would lower my stress a lot. Sure I could go to the school’s gym, but it's always super busy at the times that I like and I wouldn’t be able to do my laundry at night. 

“How do I know if he’ll do it?” I ask. I’m disappointed in myself for even considering it.

“You gotta trust me,” he says. Yeah that’s a no. “You know Taylor would definitely let you in for free. I’m surprised he doesn't already.” He has a point. Taylor isn’t past doing illegal shit. The man’s a drug dealer for christ sake and he tells people how to break into a Laundromat that he doesn't even work at anymore. This is the only reason why I agree. I trust Taylor, not Reid. 

“Fine I’ll take the pictures but I’m not posting them.”

“Hey–,” he starts.

“And you better talk to Taylor or I’ll get your friends to send your embarrassing pictures to the barstool account.”

“Okay, okay. I will.” He starts to stand. 

“Help me up.” I hold out my arm and he grabs and pulls so hard that I think he pulled it out. “Ow, bitch!” I yell and punch him in the shoulder. He stumbles back and I shake out my hand. 

“I cannot wait to see the muscles that were responsible for that.” He holds his shoulder. I roll my eyes but internally, I’m freaking the fuck out. I’ve never been this scared. 

“Turn around,” I tell Reid.

“I literally can barely see you right now.”

“Do you want me to do this or not?” I ask. He stares at me in silence. 

“Fine,” he agrees and turns around. My stomach flips and I definitely shouldn’t have eaten that Taco Bell. I take two deep breaths and pull my crew neck over my head. Thank god I wore one of my better sports bras today.

“Uhh, it’s off,” I say. He starts turning around and I quickly cover myself with my shirt. He looks me up and down and my anxiety spikes. I wish I could see his face but he’s facing away from the windows and he’s right, all I can see are shapes.

“You're gonna need to drop the shirt for the picture anyway so might as well do it now,” he says. I slowly lower my arms, feeling more and more exposed every second. I throw my shirt onto my backpack and stare right at him. His eyes rake over my chest and stomach, making a shiver run through me. “Damn, Izzy,” he steps back, “Your abs are more defined than mine are.” I blush. I feel like the worst feminist on the planet. I’m not supposed to give in to male validation, but it feels so good. 

“Just take the damn pictures, Reid.” He shakes his head and gets out his phone. “No,” I stop him and hand him my phone instead. “Use mine. I don't want you to send them to anyone.”

“I wasn’t going to.”

“Uh huh.” I nod. “Right.”

“I wont. Now stand by the washers where the blue light is,” he directs. I move past him, next to the only row of washers that are lit. 

“Tell me what to do.” I say. He clears his throat. 

“Turn around and do the basic flexing pose.” I hold up my arms and flex, showing off my arms and my back. I know it looks good because I take my own pictures that I have buried in the depths of my laptop. I have so many folders that it would take someone ages to find them. “The lighting is cool as fuck. You might need to take pictures of me next,” he says. 

“I'm not doing that.” I turn over my shoulder to catch his gaze. “What’s next?”

“Um, sit on the washer and lean back.” I slouch down so my butt is on the edge of the washer and lean back on one arm. He squats down to get a low angle. “Jesus. How many pull ups can you do?” I can see him spamming my camera. I sit up straight with my hands gripping the edge of the washer. 

“How many can you do?” I ask. He steps closer to me.

“I asked you first.” His features are illuminated by the light and I don't feel exposed anymore. I think I kind of like this. 

“Guess,” I challenge. 

“I’m not going to guess.” He takes another step towards me, sets my phone down behind me, and puts his hands next to mine on the washer. His eyes never leave mine and all I’d have to do for him to be close enough to kiss me is open my legs, but I don’t. 

“Why?”

“Because I don't want to guess wrong and be accused of underestimating you.” he says sincerely. My heart flips in my chest. 

“Do you want me to flex again so you can make a more accurate judgement?” I tease. 

“Yes,” he breathes. I adjust my hair and flex at the same time and then put my hands on his shoulders. I feel him tense beneath me and his breath hitches. “I'm guessing 10.”

“14,” I correct, “But I haven't done them in a while.”

“Impressive.”

“Thanks.” The blue light makes his jaw look super sharp and I can just barely make out a faint dusting of freckles on his nose. His gaze flickers to my lips and back up to my eyes and heat rises in my body. My mind doesn't want me to kiss him but my body clearly does. His hands move to my thighs, slowly spreading them apart so he can get closer to me and I let him. My body has never burned as much as it is for him right now. He starts leaning in and I close my eyes, waiting for his lips to touch mine but then my alarm blares loudly behind me and I jump.

“Goddamnit,” he says, jumping back. I reach behind me and frantically tap the screen to get the alarm to shut off.

“I should, um,” I stammer, pointing behind him at the dryers.

“Oh, uh, yeah.” He moves to the side and I slide off the washer, not daring to look at him. Neither of us say a word as I pile my clothes into my laundry bag and walk over to my things. I curse at myself while putting my hoodie back on. I almost kissed him. I almost kissed Reid Parker, and I wanted to too. He’s still standing in the same spot when I go back to grab my phone.

“Um, i'm gonna go,” I say, turning towards the door. 

“Yeah, ok. I gotta stay here, so.” He hoists himself onto his own washer. 

“Ill see you,” I say, immediately cringing. I open the door and walk back to my dorm. What the hell just happened?

#this is random but i really like this #oneshot #drabble #fluff #a bit spicy #not ever sure i can advertise spicyness #creative writing

[this-just-me]

I didn’t even get up for school. My mum is so mad at me, I was supposed to get up and get ready for school, I did have an alarm but I ignored it and went back to sleep. This is really bad. I haven’t moved since yesterday day. I’ve been in the same clothes all week end and yesterday. Today I felt so useless. I wanted to get up. But when ever I got up, I had a really bad headache and it was like something was saying “no Armani stay in bed, no one wants you around anyways, you should just stay in bed” and I did. All day I just slept. I don’t know what I’m doing anymore. At the start of the year I had so many goals. And I just can’t accomplish them. I feel so lazy and don’t want to get up, I just want to sleep all day. And I stay up all night. What’s wrong.?

It’s like when ever I’m awake I’m not actually awake.? Like when I’m awake I’m literally zone out for hours, and it even scars my mum sometimes. Because I don’t notice when it happens. And then I see my brother, and he’s happy talking to me. But then reality hits me and I notice, he’s dead. He’s not alive anymore. Idk if it’s me not eating enough.

I actually don’t know anymore, when I zone out it’s like km watching a movie but a movie of all my favourite memories and memories I wish I could forget.?

I don’t wanna live like this anymore, but I don’t know how to change.

[tragicomedys]

my mom will be like *ruins my whole mood*

#ok i’m venting in tags #💭​.txt #///////////// #what the fucj is wrong with her lmfao... idgaf if ur pmsing or ur anxious or goin thru it you go be alone with urself and chill out #literally like go to ur room and take some breaths ? she has no chill the way she’s looking to argue with me or something #and then she’s like i’m still mad at you for doing this thing which wasn’t even that bad or mean or anything i didn’t even say anythingwrong #like OK? grow up LMAO ur the one stressing ur self out that’s not my problem. literally why r u just sitting in the living room waiting for #the next person to argue with ... find another outlet queen! #no and she does that thing where she’s like fine i’m just annoyed i’m clearly just some crazy person!! Like. girl did i say that? no tell me #did i say that? Lmfao. Maybe u are a little crazy literally leave me alone go be annoyed somewhere else and learn to deal w ur emotions cuz #ur not a teenaged girl anymore 🤣🤣🤣 #omg i’m pissed sorry this isn’t even that bad but i’ve had a short temper these past couple of days #no what gets me is that i didn’t even insult her or say anything bad to her #maybe it wasn’t very sensitive of me to refute her anxious rambling by trying to intellectualize or tell her things aren’t actually that bad #but like. it was anxious rambling. so yeah i refuted shit. but i didn’t even say anything mean. the meanest thing i said was #enough i have a headache i don’t wanna talk anymore. that’s literally it ... no i wish my family members just had normal fucking ways of #regulating their anger and fuckinf anxiety. everyone except me and my twin brother are not fucking normal when it comes to anger fucking get #help #ok enough good bye #i’m just so mad cuz i finally had the motivation to exercise and then she just shat all over my mood like that!! god !!! #/ #mothers #mother m

[nightowlfandom]

Yandere! Hawks (Keigo Takami) - Scratches and Bruises

CHECK OUT MY MASTERLIST HERE!

Alright I’ll do it...I’LL WRITE HAWKS SMUT....but I won’t like it.

Okay people so This is gonna have talks of death, abuse, yandere shit.

Leggo!

...

“What’s a pretty girl like you do sad for?”

You looked up from your phone to find a man practically leaning over the restaurant table. You could smell the alcohol from miles away and the way he was moving wasn’t helping his case either. You were instantly put off by him. Correction: You were disgusted by him.

“What’s a ugly man like you so bold for?” you smiled sweetly as the venom dripped off your words. “I’m really not interested.” you looked back down at your phone. You were just about to get a new high score on your favorite phone game and this asshole was ruining your chances. Your character almost died twice since he began bothering you. It was really starting to get on your nerves. If you didn’t unlock that new skin, you might kill someone.

“Oh come on.” he slurred. “Can a guy just compliment such a pretty lady?”

“Not when he looks like fucking Voldemort.” you replied just as quickly as he ended his sentence. “You’re kind of bothering me right now.” you pressed pause on your game and looked up again. “I’ll ask again. What do you want, seriously?”

Out of the corner of your eye, you noticed a guy at one of the booths, staring over at you. It didn’t feel creepy, but it was enough to capture your attention. 

“I wanted to-”

“What do you want?” you cut him off again. “We’re wasting time here.” you threw your phone on the table. “Save me the headache and save your ego...” you crossed your arms. you faked a smile. “Goodbye.”

“You bit-”

“Is there a problem?” 

A new person walked up to you two. The same guy who you had noticed before stopped in front of your table. He had sandy brown hair, and very sharp looking eyes. You swore you’ve seen him somewhere. You weren’t too sure.

“Nothing buddy, just about to show this bitch who she’s talking to-”

You crossed your arms and shifted around in your seat. “I mean I don’t need to be shown anything.” you shrugged.

“Oh are you?” he laughed. “Well I hate to break it to you but I’ll have to intervene” the stranger laughed out loud. 

“What do you mean-”

The drunk was instantly floored as this stranger grabbed his by the neck and slammed his face against the table not even an inch away from your phone. The drunk landed on the floor with a thud, moaning in pain. You weren’t even sure if he was registering the pain he was in or the fact that he had gotten his ass handed to him in the first place. All that you knew was that he was being peeled off the floor and escorted (more like thrown out.).

“You’re welcome, lady.” the guy didn’t take another look at you before be took a step forward. 

“I didn’t need your help.” you snatched your phone off the desk. “I can take care of myself.” you rolled your eyes. “And I wasn’t gonna thank you, either.” you stood up. “I’m definitely not going to now.”

The man slowly turned around, revealing his face clearly. “Oh really?” 

He was attractive, no doubt about it. His tight black muscle tee with baggy jeans and boots...damn he was a looker. Yet you weren’t like most MC’s...it would take a bit more than that for him to have any impact on you.

“Really.” you repeated. You put a hand on your hip. “Now if you’ll excuse me...I’m off to find another table to sit at.”

The man who ‘saved’ you didn’t take his eyes off you all night. Even when your friends came and joined you. 

“Hey Y/N, is that Keigo Takami looking at you?”

“I think it is!” another friend piped.

“Who?” you stared at her as you lowered your drink. “Who is Keigo Takami?”

“Y’know...Hawks.” she whispered. “I heard they call him that when he served time...” 

“He’s a literally crazy person. He’s an absolute menace! He’s a former hero...”

“Can imagine why...he beat the shit out of this guy who tried to hit on me.”

“Him?! I haven’t heard of him ever doing that for anyone before.” your other friend widened her eyes. “Y/N, I’ve heard of his past relationships...they didn’t end well. They all ended up missing...or in therapy.”

“I can take care of myself.” you shrugged. “I’m sure whatever Hawks has for me, I can take.”

“Don’t say that so freely, Girl. I heard he has a lot of screws loose.” your friend put a hand on your shoulder. “Like a lot.”

“Well whatever Mr. Man has in store for me, I’ll be prepared. It can’t be that bad, right?” your confidence dispersed a little bit. You looked behind you back at Keigo who had been cracking open a can of beer. He looked a little to interested in his own world to see you staring. 

“Y/N...Y/N!” your friend snapped her fingers in your face. “You okay?”

“Y-yeah!” You focused back on your friends, feeling your emotions sort of switch. 

From the corner of the room, Keigo’s eyes followed you. He took his bottom lip between his teeth as he studied you. Never in his life had he ever seen a girl like you before. He had never been so...fascinated either. Something inside him snapped, he had to get to know you.

He had to.

...

“Is there a reason  you’re following me?”

On a trip to the supermarket, you couldn’t help but voice your opinions. Keigo was hiding in behind a display of cans whilst you stared at the cheese. Hmmm Cheddar or American? Maybe Havarti! Hmm Pepperjack? Why were there too many types of cheeses?! Too many options!

“You have a very keen eye.” he revealed himself. “I like that.” he began walking along side down down the aisle. “Try this one, it’s the best on burgers.” he grabbed a package of Pepperjack cheese and tossed it in the cart.

“I’m just very aware.” you replied boredly. “It comes with the territory.” you opted to ignore him trying to shop for you. 

“Of being a hero?” 

His words made you freeze. You hadn’t been a hero in years, let along thought about it. It had been so long...

“I hung up my cape years ago.” you rebutted. Your tried to keep your voice steady, but he could tell his words affected you. It made you wonder how he even knew that.

“I can say the same.” he winked. “Only I traded the cape for...other things.”

“I can tell...Hawks.” you grumbled in reply. “That’s what they used to call you right?”

Keigo knew you were challenging him. Part of him was angry, others not so much. He was interested to say the least. No one dared call him that anymore. Hell, no one lived long enough to even finish such a sentence. What made you so different? You had guts...he liked that.

“Yeah...that part of my life is over now.” he began following you down the aisle. “What about you? Why’d you give up hero work?”

“That’s not something I want to discuss with a stranger in the middle of the store.” 

“I get it...how’s 7:00 sound?”

“Pardon me?” You and your cart skid to a stop. “What did you just say to me?”

“I’ll meet you at the bar we met around 7! Don’t be late, and tell the bartender Takami Keigo is gonna be waitin’ for ya.” he winked. “Don’t leave me waiting princess...”

“I don’t even know you!” you were taken aback. “You don’t even know my name...”

Keigo’s face twisted into a smirk. He took a step towards you. You flattened yourself against the aisle wall as he trapped you against the cereal. “So tell me...What’s your name?”

“Huh?!”

“For a hero...you’re pretty dense.” he chuckled, nearing his face closer. “I asked your name, Hun.” he winked. “Won’t you tell me?”

“Y/N.” you replied breathlessly. “My name is Y/N.” Why did you tell him that, you had no clue. Idiot!

“Okay then Y/N.” he neared his face towards yours. “7:00 tonight...okay?”

“Uh huh.” you nodded. 

“Wonderful, I’ll see you tonight, princess.”

... 

You sat at the bar stool, spinning around lazily. You called all of your friends, your parents, hell even your grandparents. You didn’t tell them the details, but you told them if you didn’t message them back by 9:00 AM the next morning, call you just in case.

“What can I get you?” the barkeep walked up, wearing a kind smile on his face. You suddenly remembered that Keigo had told you, and you didn’t trust it one bit. “Can I get a water please?” 

“Coming right up, young lady.” the older man kindly looked at you. “Anything for the former Number 1 hero!”

You giggled bashfully. “Please, that was years ago.” you shook your head. “I appreciate it though.” you smiled. Hero work, the bane of your existence. Your past buddies and partners had all begged you not to leave, but with the amount of scars and suffering you endured, you had no choice.

You wouldn’t put yourself through that again, not for anyone. 

“Here you are miss.” the glass was set in front of you. 

“Thanks.” you put your hand over the top of the glass. Now that it was in yoru hand, you could move accordingly. “I was also supposed to meet someone here?...Told me to tell you to expect me...Keigo Takami?”

The barkeep’s face fell, fear striking his features. “O-oh! You’re Mr. Takami’s company for the night! I’m supposed to escort you to his special booth.”

“Special booth?” you repeated.

“Y-yes, please follow me!” he urged. “Only VIPs are allowed back here, but he rented out the entire back area just for you!”

You felt your senses go off, fight or flight mode. Now or never. You reached in your purse. Knife, check. Mace, check....Gun...check.

The kind barkeep took you to a back area. It looked like the main dining area, only a lot more high end. Slow jazz music was playing in the background and the lights were low. He was right, there was no one here...except one person.

He dawned a brown leather jacket, black skinny jeans and those all to familiar boots. He tapped his fingers against the table as he stared down at his phone.

“Mr. Takami. She’s here.”

Keigo looked up with that shit-eating smirk. “Thank you Hideo, leave us.”

The barkeep stalked off leaving you alone. You suddenly felt out of place. You looked around, taking note of the city beaming outside the windows. 

“Beautiful isn’t it?” 

You looked back over at Keigo again, almost surprised. “Yeah, it is.” you nodded.

He motioned next to him. “You wanna sit down or are you gonna stand there staring at me? I don’t bite.” he winked.

Silently, you sat down, still keeping your distance from the man. You were about a good two feet away from him. You weren’t too keen on getting any closer.

“I’m surprised you came. I thought you’d find a way to get out of this.”

“I am too, but I figured I’d entertain this idea...just for tonight.” you shrugged. “Don’t try anything, got it?”

“Wouldn’t dream of it.”

Keigo cracked a genuine smile. You looked stunning and he wanted to tell you that. He wouldn’t admit it, but he knew about you when you were going by your hero alias. He recognized the way you walked, the way you spoke. You could have killed that freak who hit on you if you wanted to. However you didn’t. He was curious about that.

“Why did you ask me out?” you raised an eyebrow before he could get a word out.

“I’ll let you know in a minute.” he winked. “I’m more interested in you.”

“Like what?” you raised an eyebrow. “How interesting can I be?”

Keigo didn’t want to say he did extensive research on you and couldn’t find shit. It drove him crazy. It was making him go quite literally insane. He was more that interested. He was invested. When he didn’t answer, you sighed.

“You tell me first.” you crossed your arms. “I know your reputation proceeds you.” you raised a brow.

“Princess, that’s not how this works.” he tried to sound as if he was joking. “I ask the questions here.”

“Well it is today.” you shrugged. “Either we have an even exchange or you’re out of luck.” you shrugged. “You decide.”

Keigo stared blankly at you. You were a tough nut, that was for sure. Plus you sure as hell weren’t afraid of death. That must have meant you had no idea what he was capable of. Then again, it must have been your Hero Side taking a stance.

After what felt like a minute, he sighed in defeat. “...A friend of mine was killed by a hero.” he confessed. “You ever hear of someone called The Bronze Monk?”

“That name sounds familiar?” you raised an eyebrow. “He’s another hero, right? He can turn his fists into bronze.” You tried to recall.

“Mhm...He killed my friend.” Keigo clenched his fist. “I did 6 years because of him....”

“I don’t understand.” you raised an eyebrow. “What does that have to do with you?”

“This was while you were dominating the game I guess, so I don’t blame you for not knowing.” he shrugged and he slapped a hand on the table. “HIDEO! TWO BEERS.”

“So I’m confused. I heard The Bronze Monk died mysteriously...he fell from over 500 stories...”you paused. You took to time to noticed that Keigo has aired out his wings this time around. You didn’t even noticed he HAD wings. “It was all over the-...wait a second...You never said who your friend was.”

“She was a- she was a villain.” Keigo sighed. “She was like a sister to me and I was tryna get her to stop being so dumb...turn over a new leave and she was doing so well! Shit, but...one day she dumbly got into a fight with that asshole and I watched my friend die right there.” Keigo hitched his words slightly.

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have asked.” you said sadly, regretting opening your big mouth. “I didn’t mean to-”

“No...it’s fine. I guess in order to move on I gotta talk about it right?” he sat up straight as the barkeep came back with two mugs and quickly stalked back off. “I was so blinded by my own anger. What type of hero would go out of their way to punish someone trying to make amends....” he seethed. “I flew him up to the tallest building in the city and dropped him...I only got off on good behavior...”

It finally all made sense, to you at least. You let what he said marinate and sit well...it felt surreal.

“So.” Keigo grabbed his glass and took a huge gulp. “I’ve said my peace. You’re turn.”

You stared at this guy for what felt like ages. Something told you that this guy couldn’t be trusted. All the alarms were going off at the same time...but for some reason-

“My parents wanted me to be a hero.” you said. “My quirk is hereditary, so it’s passed from person to person.” you shrugged. “I loved saving people, helping people...then-” you paused. “I saw how corrupt, and hateful, and disgusting these so-called heroes were...I lost someone important to me too.”

Keigo raised an eyebrow, suddenly interested. You took a swig of beer, trying to gather your thoughts. 

Keigo took note of the way you were fiddling with your left hand. Your thumb grazed over your ringer finger as if something was missing...something important.

“Who was the guy?” Keigo asked, snapping you out of your trance. He had a gut feeling he already knew, but he wanted to hear it from your mouth.

“...H-he was um...we dated since high school.” you shrugged. “We were a team, him and I.” you smiled at the memory. “When he turned his back on the hero world, they turned their back on him too.”

“Meaning?”

“They sold him out.” you choked. “They left him for dead and told me he would be okay. I should have gone back for him but they held me back, they told me there were other people that needed my help.”

“What happened when you learned the truth?” Keigo asked. He only knew that a poor hero lost his life, he didn’t know that the only other survivor just so happened to be his future wife.

“I had to choose...my friends and my morals or being a hero. If anyone knows just how two faced and conniving these people are, it’s me.” you shuddered. “I’ve met traitors, and killers disguised as good guys. At one point I couldn’t take it anymore and I gave up! Forget being number 1, forget status, forget everything...Being a hero...lost me everything.”

“Hm. Thank you for sharing that with me, Princess.” he replied. “It must have been hard to do...it’s nice to know you trust me so much.”

“It was only fair, I guess.” you boredly drank. “It not that big a deal.” you stared down at your fingers. “It was years ago, I’ve moved on.”

Keigo took note of how your mood faltered. He couldn’t have that.

“Hey, look at me?”

“Hm?” you looked up from your glass.

“I’m sure where ever your fiancé is, whatever he’s up to. He doesn’t blame you.” he put a hand over yours. “He wouldn��t hate you for moving on either.”

“He wouldn’t?” you narrowed your eyes. “How do you know?”

Keigo couldn’t answer, he just wanted to say something, anything, to put a smile on your face. It was like a second nature in such a short time. He wanted to be your hero. “It’s just a hunch...you shouldn’t be afraid to move on...sometimes all you need is a push out the nest.” he winked as his wings twitched behind his back.

“Bird humor? Really?” you scoffed.

“It’s what I do, princess.”

...

After the heavy and depressing, you don’t think you laughed that hard in years. 

“Wait hold on.” you stopped laughing. “Pause for a minute! You, with those big ass wings got your ass handed to you by some chump named ‘The weather man?’” you were crying from laughing so hard.

“He could control the wind!” he defended, also laughing. “You shoulda seen it!”

“Well maybe you need to exercise your quirk more.” you crossed your arms.

“As if you’re the master of your own.” he playfully rolled his eyes.

“As a matter of fact, I am!” you raised an eyebrow. “Shall I demonstrate?” you scooted out the booth and stood up. “Don’t blink or you might miss it.”

Keigo leaned back in his seat, now very interested in what you were about to display for him. He watched your eyes narrow in focus as you held your hands out in front of your face. Slowly, a very tiny tornado formed in your hands, small and handheld. This mini tornado was soon replaced by a tree sprouting out of the top. You waved your hand around and miraculously summoned rain out of your palm. 

“Okay Y/N, focus.” you mumbled. Suddenly, out of everything, a flame erupted from the center of your hand. 

He watched in awe, he had never heard of anyone with a quirk like this one before. With another flick of the hand, everything you had summoned disappeared. “Ta-da!”

“That was amazing.” he commented as your sat down. “What was that??”

“I come from a long line of ‘benders’. Funny name, I know.” you giggled. “I can bend another element...spirit. I can only do it when I’m really happy though.”

“Why didn’t you try that one?”

“...I said I can only do it when I’m happy.” you smiled sadly. It didn’t take long for Keigo to catch on. 

“Oh.” he raised a brow. “Sorry, I-”

“It’s alright.” you shook your head. “Ever since...he died...I’ve never been able to do it.” you shrugged. “Maybe one day I’ll be able to.”

“I’d love to witness that.” Keigo laced his fingers within yours, making your face heat up. “I bet it’s beautiful.”

“...S-shush.” you scoffed, looking away bashfully.

Suddenly the song changed, a slow jazz song began playing. A slow beat, with soft drums and what you could describe as a romantic saxophone.

“Dance with me.” he held out his hand. 

You smiled, rolling your eyes playfully as you took his hand and stood up. He guided you to the middle of the floor. he pulled you flush against his chest. The slow music seemed to drown out the hustle of the city noise outside. He hummed thoughtfully, singing to the tune for you. 

“You never told me.” you mused as you two moved in sync.

“Told you what, princess?”

“Why did you ask me out?”

“Truth be told, something drew me to you.”

“Like what?” you innocently stared. “What about me could possibly interest you?”

“Out of everything you’ve told me, everything really.” he bit his lip. “You’re amazing, everything about you.”

“You aren’t so bad yourself, Keigo.” you shyly replied. You turned around and rested your back against his chest. He rested his head in the divot of your shoulder. He wrapped his arms around your waist, guiding you along to the music. 

He was right, he wouldn’t leave you, not now. Not ever. 

“Can I ask you a question?”

“Go for it, princess.”

“If I admitted I was wrong about you, would you hold it against me?”

Keigo nearly froze. A shock was sent up his spine as the words left your lips. “You shouldn’t say things like that, princess.”

“How come?” you turned around to face him. 

“I want to-” he bit his lip. A gentle hand rested on the base of your neck, his thumb caressing your throat. He laid a kiss on your lips, passion dripping off of every peck. His tongue slipped through the small gap as he moaned against your mouth. You whimpered and shivered feeling his tongue dominate your mouth. He responded with sounds of his own. Shaky breathes and low groans.

You responded to his touch, allowing his hands to travel under your shirt. “Keigo.” you whimpered. Your feverishly ran your hands through his hair, practically gluing your bodies together. You felt his fingertips creep under shirt, dancing across your skin. “W-we can’t do this here.”

“You’re totally right.” he didn’t cease, instead opting to kiss down your neck. “So...my place or yours.”

You felt yourself lose all sense of direction. “Y-yours.”

“You’ve just opened up Pandora’s Box, princess.”

...

You fell back on his bed, crawling backwards. He rid himself of that jacket and his shirt, leaving him to flex his muscles, his wings, and everything. You stared up, trembling in anticipation. 

Your friends would probably kill you, but you didn’t particularly care. You hugged yourself, suddenly feeling very vulnerable. 

Keigo loved it. It meant you still had innocence flowing in your veins, not for long. He would toy with your brain. He would bend you to his will and drive you insane with lust. You would be the perfect sidekick for him. He stalked over to you, biting his lip. 

“Look at you.” he mused. “You’re so cute.” he giggled. He rested a knee at the edge of the bed, beginning to crawl towards you. 

You noticed his wings were spread wide, covering over you two like a shield.

“C-can I?”

“Go ahead Princess.” he smiled knowingly. He had the look as if he knew something you didn’t. You reached a trembling hand to gently brush his beautiful feathers. A low groan erupted from his throat.

“Oh my gosh! Am I hurting you?” you almost withdrew your hand back.

“Don’t stop...please.” he growled lowly. 

It was only then you realized, this was turning him on. You ran your hands through his feathers. They were soft, shiny even. 

“Enough!” he grabbed your hand and pinned it above your head. “Look at you, princess. All ready for me.” he laughed. “I wonder how wet I can make that pussy for me.” he used his other hand to fumble with the button of your jeans.

You trembled under his touch, feeling your pants slide down your legs. You were completely drowned in your own lust. A fire was prominent in your chest. You were shaking under his fingertips. 

“Enjoy this, princess.” he winked before crawling down. He lifted your shirt up and planted little kisses along your stomach. He grabbed the hem of your panties with his teeth and pulled them down. 

You were squirming in anticipation, waiting. 

“You smell so...so-” he didn’t finish his sentence because he had drove his tongue up your slit. A gasp escaped your lungs. Absentmindedly, you had grabbed a fist full of his hair. 

“Fuuuh~” you couldn’t speak. You weren’t even sure he’d be able to hear your over the sound of your wetness. You could feel your water dribble down your thighs. 

“Wrapped your legs around my head.” he growled, digging his nails into your thighs. “Grind that pussy against my tongue, princess.” 

You thrashed against his mouth, feeling warmth gather in the pit of your stomach. “Keigo!”

He wrapped his lips around your clit and sucked harshly, making you cry out even louder. 

Keigo felt himself lose touch with everything, he was only focused on you in the moment. Fuck, was he hard too. Hearing your moans. Shit, he couldn’t wait to bury himself into you. 

“Baby, do you hear that?” he looked up at you as he promptly replaced his tongue with his fingers. “Listen.” he pumped his fingers into you. “You sound so fucking cute” he groaned, mimicking your soft whimpers. “It feels good, yeah?”

You couldn’t speak, so you just nodded. 

Suddenly, he yanked his fingers out of you. His head fell forward to rest on your pubic bone. He sounded as if he came just now even if it was you getting all the pleasure. 

Like a predator stalking after it’s prey he meet your eyes. He wore a sadistic grin with his bottom lip taken between his teeth. He sat up, fumbling with his belt buckle. 

“You ready for me, princess?”

“Yes, p-please?” you whimpered. 

Fuck, you couldn’t do that to him. He had a mind to tear you apart where you lay. Your jaw went slack as his cock was released from its restraints. Would that even- Inside you?! 

You felt it brush against you, slightly. You met his eyes and froze there. He was staring down at you. He looked absolutely feral. You could barely look away as he slid himself inside your throbbing hole. He painfully slowly rolled his hips into you. He twitched inside as he bucked his hips into you. 

“Look at how good we fit together. That’s right.” he managed through clenched teeth. “My cock was meant to be here. I was meant to fuck you.” he snarled. 

You tightened around his length as he thrust harder. “You’re so fucking beautiful, princess.” His jaw dropped again. “Say my name, please?”

“K-keigo.” you obeyed. You felt a warmth in your chest as well as your core. It was like a fire was being ignited in the pit of your soul. “I’m gonna-”

“Fuck! Don’t finish that sentence.” he snarled. “You don’t wanna know what I’m gonna do as a result.”

In a swift motion, you were suddenly staring down at Keigo. He had a death grip on your legs as he was now thrusting upwards. You had your hands on his chest in an attempt to support yourself.

“I think I like you more when you’re riding me.” he bit his lip. “You look so fucking sexy. Those moans, that body, your pretty fucking pussy-”

“Keigo, please! I can’t it anymore.”

“Oh yeah, you gonna cum? You wanna cum for me, baby?” he spoke in a babyish voice. “You wanna cum all over Papa Bird’s cock? Do it, do it for me...ARGH FUCK!”

You felt his warmth inside you at the exact same time you had came. He was shaking under you, rolling his hips upwards to relieve the friction he had caused. 

Keigo stared in amazement at a bright light erupted from your chest, a small bird in the shape of smoke began flying around the room.

“That would be spirit.” you laughed tiredly, watching the quirk you had thought died reactivate out of nowhere. 

“I hope you know...you can never leave me now.” Keigo sat up to lay kisses on your neck. “You’re mine now.”

(AND DONE! This was Hawks debut on the blog so lets all give hem a huge hello!)

#anime x reader #anime imagines #anime scenarios #anime headcanons #anime x reader imagines #anime x reader scenarios #bnha imagines #bnha x reader #bnha hawks #bnha keigo #keigo takami x reader #hawks x reader #x reader #imagines #hawks x reader imagines #keigo takami bnha #keigo takami smut #keigo takami lemon #bnha lemon #hawks lemon #hawks smut #smut imagines #fan fic #nightowlfandom

[fruitcoops]

Hey I was wondering if you could write something kinda angsty but with a pretty ending with the cubs, I’m trynna project getting stood up and turning it into something nice and good, even if it’s just in my head. No pressure but I just wanna smile for a bit and your work always makes me do so :)))

Hello lovely! I’m so sorry that you were stood up--that feels awful and whoever did it missed out on a wonderful person. I’ve combined this with some other asks in the same vein (y’all wanted my boys to hurt) so I hope you don’t mind. Sending love and hugs your way! Sweater Weather credit goes to @lumosinlove​ <3

1. Bad mental health day for Finn + pushing himself too hard + passing out (ft. Bee anon!)

2. O’Knutzy boiling over with a fluffy ending

3. Insecure Leo

TW for internalized guilt, vaguely implied self-harm (pushing himself too hard at practice), and relationship arguments

Finn had a few bad habits. He left dirty dishes in the sink, could never remember which setting the laundry was supposed to go on, and barely wiped his shoes on the doormat before entering the house. He wasn’t proud of his flaws, but he acknowledged that everyone had some—as long as they didn’t hurt anybody, it wasn’t the end of the world.

This one…this one was different. Even Finn knew that.

He gritted his teeth for the next set of squats, ignoring the ringing in his ears and the climbing nausea in his gut. The chart only said to do three reps, but he had been beating himself up for slacking a set earlier in the week and decided to do five to make up for it.

That, it seemed, was a poor decision.

His thighs were shaking when he finally put the weight down and he leaned on the wall to stabilize himself. “Fish? You okay?” Logan asked from the yoga mat to his right, staring up at him in concern.

“I’m fine,” Finn lied. “Just straightened up too fast.”

“D’accord.” He could feel Logan’s eyes on his back as he left the gym and headed toward the showers.

Finn’s worst habit was taking care of himself, and it wasn’t something that could be explained away as “oh, silly Harzy” like the washing machine. He made a mental note to take some ibuprofen before driving home so he would be marginally less sore in the morning, but he had the sinking feeling it would be a rough practice the next day.

Remus and Talker were playing some sort of volleyball with an old balloon between their stalls when he entered; he missed getting nailed in the head by a narrow margin and waved off their apologies with a forced smile.

A hand closed around his bicep as he passed, snapping him back to reality as Leo’s bright eyes came into focus. “Hey, lovey, is Lo with you?”

“He’s finishing up.”

A small furrow appeared between Leo’s brows. “Is something wrong?”

“Nope.” Finn faked a yawn and stretched his arm over Leo’s shoulder, dragging him down for a kiss on the cheek. “Cap’s workout just kicked my ass today.”

“That’s what they’re supposed to do,” Sirius said, rolling his eyes playfully as he passed. “You’re not a rookie anymore, O’Hara.”

“Yeah, yeah, alright.”

Logan entered the locker room a few minutes later; Finn closed his eyes and breathed in the thick steam of the shower until the fog in his head cleared a bit and he couldn’t feel the skin on his shoulders. It billowed off him as he dressed again and tossed the keys to Leo, who raised his eyebrows. “Me?”

“You. There’s a little bit of slush left, and you still need to learn how to drive in it.” And I feel like I’m going to pass out at any minute. He swallowed down the last thought and pasted a teasing grin on his face—what Leo and Logan didn’t know wouldn’t hurt them. It was his own fault for being lazy in the past.

-----------------------

What Leo and Logan didn’t know apparently did hurt them. In hindsight, Finn should have seen that coming before he passed out in the middle of a scrimmage.

The lights of the coach’s office made his headache even worse. “Care to explain?” Arthur asked in a voice like frost. To his left, Sirius was glowering.

“I already told Hestia—”

“Yeah, I know what you told Hestia,” Arthur interrupted. “I want to hear it directly from you.”

Finn sighed through his nose and picked at a stray thread on his jersey. “I…I pushed myself a little too hard at yesterday’s practice and didn’t say anything when I started feeling bad.”

“Why.” Sirius’ eyes were hard as flint.

“Because I didn’t want to be a pain in the ass! I can handle some aching muscles, it’s not a big deal!”

“Not a—”

Arthur put his hand on Sirius’ shoulder. “That’s enough, Black. O’Hara, I want you to look me in the eyes.” Finn raised his head. “This was a dumbass mistake and all of us expected better from you. Your safety and health come before any workout routine, and it is your responsibility to speak up before you scare the shit out of us by dropping like a rock.”

“I’m sorry, Coach.”

“Apology accepted. I also want you to call Heather when you get home and schedule an appointment with her.” Some of Arthur’s frustration melted into genuine concern and guilt crawled up Finn’s throat. “Doing that to yourself isn’t healthy, Finn. You’re a good man, smart, and I know you know better.”

“Can we talk for a second?” Sirius asked quietly, glancing at Arthur. He nodded and left the room.

“I’m sorry.”

“What the fuck, Finn?” Sirius ran a hand down his face, suddenly pale. “What the fuck was that?”

“It was stupid.”

“Yeah, no, I got that part.”

“I slacked off a set on Monday.”

“Wow, nobody’s ever done that before,” he said sarcastically, sitting down in the chair by the wall as Finn resumed messing with his hem. “You scared the hell out of all of us.”

“I know.”

“You know I’m not mad at you, right? I’m upset that you thought you had to do that at all.”

Tears prickled the backs of Finn’s eyes. “I know.”

“I’m sure as hell not your coach or your dad, but I’m going to say this as your friend, okay?” Sirius leaned over into Finn’s field of view. “Whatever you need, I’m here for you. This team wouldn’t be the same without you. I wouldn’t be the same without you. We need you to take care of yourself, Harzy.”

Finn nodded silently and Sirius gave his hand a quick squeeze, which he returned. “Does everyone know?”

“I told them you were under the weather, nothing more.”

“Classic media answer.” He tried and failed to crack a smile. “Thanks for not telling on me.”

“That’s not my job. My job is herding cats on ice skates for five hours a day.”

Finn’s smile was real that time and he managed a light laugh as he swiped away the dampness on his cheeks. “Love you, man.”

“Love you, too.” Sirius helped him stand up and hugged him tight for a second before letting go. “Speaking as someone who used to do the exact same thing, talking to Heather makes a world of difference.”

“I’ll give her a call.”

The cold feeling returned to Finn’s gut when they stepped out of the office; Leo and Logan were waiting by the opposite wall, looking angrier than Finn had ever seen. Sirius patted his shoulder once before walking off down the hallway toward the locker room, where he would no doubt deflect even more questions.

“Hey,” Finn said, barely above a whisper. Logan continued to stare at the ground.

“You lied to us,” Leo said bluntly. “Several times. Both of us asked if you were alright and you told us you were fine.”

“I’m sorry.”

“I accept your apology, but I don’t understand.” He ran a hand through his hair with a sigh. “Finn, this isn’t how we deal with things. We agreed to be a team.”

Finn bit his lip. I fucked this one up. “We did. I am so sorry for scaring you—”

“We’re not mad that you scared us,” Logan snapped, still looking anywhere but his face. “We’re upset that you refuse to take care of yourself and then lied to us about it.”

Leo nudged Logan’s shoulder before turning back. “Why did you do that, Finn?”

“I didn’t want to fall behind. I was just trying to make up for the set I skipped on Monday.”

“What? Twenty squats and some pushups? That’s not worth your health, honey.” The pet name soothed the terror clutching Finn’s heart and he took a deep breath. They still loved him. This wasn’t the end.

“It was a stupid thing to do and it won’t happen again.”

“Good. Let’s go home.” Logan grabbed his duffel bag off the ground and started walking toward the door; Leo looked like he was going to say something, but Finn gently took his elbow.

“He’s going to need a minute,” he said under his breath. Logan was a hothead about many things, but lying was in the top three. Finn knew he hurt him deep.

“Did you…” Leo trailed off and pressed his lips together as they followed Logan into the parking lot. “Did you feel like you couldn’t tell me?”

Finn shook his head. “No. This was all on me.”

“It’s just that I know I’m younger than both of you and I’m new to the hockey lifestyle, but I never want you to think you can’t trust me—”

“Leo.” Finn stopped walking and tugged on Leo’s hand, turning him around. Worry was painted all over his face and it sliced to Finn’s core. “I trust you and Logan with everything, but I got into my head about this and I wasn’t thinking about how it would hurt you. Please believe that.”

Leo sighed. “I do. I just don’t get it.”

“Neither do I, to be honest.” Logan was already sitting in the car with his headphones on as they crossed the lot. “It’s going to take him a while to talk to me, isn’t it?”

“He was really upset.”

“We’ll figure this out.” He tightened his grip on Leo’s hand. “We’ve made it through worse.”

-----------------------------

The apartment crackled with tension until Finn literally had to stick his head out the open window to get a breath of fresh air. Waves of frustration and hurt rolled off Logan, though he still refused to look Finn in the eyes.

After dinner, Leo slid into the armchair before Logan could get there, leaving only the couch available. They carefully sat on opposite sides—Finn stole glances at Logan out of the corner of his eye for the entire first half of the movie. Ninety minutes of action later, he felt something chilly poking at his calf.

Logan kept his gaze trained on the TV as he scooted his freezing toes under Finn’s legs. Relief flooded Finn’s veins; he felt a little like crying, but instead schooled his expression into a small smile and rested his hand on Logan’s ankle, where it stayed until the movie ended.

Leo had fallen asleep by that time, splayed out sideways on the cushion with his face smushed against the armrest. “Il est mignon,” Logan said softly. There was a beat of silence and he looked over at Finn. “He’s cute.”

“He is.” Finn cleared his throat and met his eyes. “I’m so sorry, Lo. I never meant to hurt you, but I did, and I’m sorry.”

“Promise me you won’t do that again.”

“I won’t.”

Finn had a few bad habits, but backing out on his promises would never be one of them.

[lareinenoir]

THE PURGE; Sanctuary C.E x black reader

PT III

60 Days Until The Purge

THEN...

"I'll order take out. I know you like Thai-"

"Don't order anything. I'm actually not even hungry." You said as he took your bag and put it on his shoulder. "What?" He was looking at you weird and it made you frown.

"Where's the rest of your stuff?"

"You asked me to stay the night. That is my overnight bag." You replied folding your arms and walking over to the couch. Your hand touched your forehead and you sighed. You could still feel him looking at you as you tried to relax with your head leaned back. "After I tell Shonda about our situation, you're signing the papers."

"What do you mean-"

"You know what I mean." You shot back

"Ok, well theirs a lot to consider now." He motioned to your stomach and you sat up straight. "We're having a baby, now."

"No no no." You shook your head feeling your petty insides bubble a bit in sarcasm. "I'm having a baby. Me. Just me.”

"Obviously I want to be apart of our baby's life." Chris argued back and you frowned and scoffed. He put your bag down and crossed his arms as you brushed it off. "You can't seriously think I won't. V that's insane."

"You wanna know what's insane? You think you're gonna get anywhere near it. Why in the hell would I allow you and your broken promises anywhere near my child? Do you think I'm stupid? To make the same mistake twice!"

"Again? V what do you want me to do?" He asks throwing his hands up. "Acting is what I do, that's my job-"

"I don't care about that. I'm not asking you to chose your job or me-"

"It damn well near sounds like it. I would never make you choose." He countered back and you gripped your fists together.

"You may not have said it directly, but there have been many times where you have indirectly patronized me. I just found out I'm pregnant and I have been trying so hard to deal with it." you replied watching him pace back and forth and shake his head. "I have been getting the worst headaches, I can't keep any food down and I literally get lightheaded on set every single day because hiding my pregnancy has been a real joy ride." You replied sarcastically with a small chuckle

"What do you want me to do? I tell you to tell the producers, you get mad. I tell you to take a break, you get mad. I tell you to come over and you’re mad.” Chris said in disbelief. “I don't know what you want from me." He shrugs brushing the hair from his eyes.

"Not once since you found out have you asked me how I'm doing? My whole career is at risk I could lose my job. And you don't even seem to care.” You said

"V, I do care." He reached for your shoulder and you took in another breath. "I want you to stop worrying all the time. And you're right, I should be concerned more about you. I should be there for you-I should've been there for you in the beginning.” He admitted and you folded your lips again.

Are For real this time? Should I let it go and move past it? Again? No because it'll start all over again.

"This baby is mine. This is a life changing thing that's happening, I can't let you ruin it too." You spoke

" I'm taking responsibility because this is something I want. Ok? Can't we find some common ground? You of all people should know what it's like to grow up without a father!"

"You know too!" You shouted back. Chris' dad had died when he was younger. He talked about him sometimes but not as much. "I'd rather have had my father six feet under then to have him choosing when it's convenient for him to show up!" You said with your foot down shaking your head.

"Forget the divorce. Me and you living here happily married for the years to come. Whats so bad about that? Why can't I have that? What's so wrong with the picture of two parents raising a child?" His voice was loud and he was getting frustrated. He didn't shout, but you could tell how passionate he was about it. He always wanted to be a daddy, a parent. "Huh?"

"It's not just about you!" You said stepping closer. "Because..." You shrugged feeling your eyes water as you suck in your cheeks. "I knew the kind of man I was marrying. So involved with his job it took him almost fifteen years to actually start dating. It's not about you or your career. This baby is all I have right now.”

He looked confused as he relaxed his brow and pinched the bridge of his nose. From two feet away you could feel his heartbeat and you felt a little bad for how foolish you probably looked. You still loved him, not like you ever stopped, but you remembered that you still loved him.

Because, it's not about me either anymore. You thought

"Forget the papers okay..." You said swallowing your own pride. "just forget it. You’re right. I want our child to have two parents who will love him unconditionally. But it has to stop, because it takes two. I can't have you with one foot in the door." You admitted

“Yeah yeah.” He nodded “yeah I get that. I’m not going anywhere.” Chris said and you walked forward and took his hand kissing his palm as you placed it on the side of your face. “I promise V.” He cups your face and stares into your eyes. His stubble poking at you a bit as you held his wrists.

“I love you.” You said with a small smile

“Still?” He laughed making you roll your eyes as you giggled a little. “I love you too. Are you sure you aren’t hungry?” He asks again

“Yes.” You nodded “now shut up and come take a nap with me.”

NOW....

CHRIS POV**

“Damnit! Damnit! Damnit!” I said throwing the phone on the couch. I had called five times and her phone went straight to voicemail.

“This is not a test, this is your Emergency Broadcast System. Announcing the commencement of the annual purge sanctioned by the U.S. Government. ALL Weapons have been authorized for use during the purge. Government officials of ranking 10 have been granted immunity and shall not be harmed. Commencing at the siren, any and all crime (including murder) will be legal for 121 days. Police, fire, and Emergency Medical services will be unavailable until December 15, 12:00 o’clock midnight, when the purge concludes. Blessed be our new founding fathers and America... A nation reborn. May God be with you all.”

My tv was replayed the message nine more times before shutting off. I swallowed the lump in my throat. Today is august 15, Vanessa’s birthday is tomorrow which was when she’d be 17 weeks. We had marked it on the calendar together. More than half my wife’s pregnancy would be spent during the purge. I needed to find her!

I didn’t support the purge. Something about killing people to be “cleansed” just didn’t sit right in my gut. It made my heart ache thinking about the clean up at the end. I could bring Dodger, but he can only do so much. Maybe he could help track her scent. Grabbing my coat I folded my lips together.

“Fuck!” I shout

With what weapon? How was I going to run the streets looking for my wife without a gun? I loved the idea of owning one, but Vanessa made me swear not to bring one in the house if she was there. So I just dropped the idea. Looking in the kitchen I grabbed one of the Chef knives off the rack. Maybe this would be enough for now...

“Damnit!” I curse looking at Dodger. “She said she was at Topanga Park. Start there?” I asked, as if he’d answer back. I grabbed her bonnet from off the bathroom door handle and stuffed it in my backpack.

I didn’t hesitate l. I locked up everything and jumped inside my truck. Dodger sat on the passenger side and I felt my hands start to shake as I put my foot on the gas. I started to promise god I would go to church if he would keep her safe.

“I don’t even know if you’re even listening or you even care. I love her, I’ve been such and idiot and I don’t wanna lose her.” I looked at Dodger and he was sitting up straight. “I remember you didn’t like her. You wouldn’t let her anywhere near me, you bark and squeeze yourself in between us when we sat down in the room to watch movies.” I chuckle wiping the little tear that slipped from my eye “You stole one of her wigs too.”

“WHAT THE FUCK!” she shouted chasing you around the house. “DODGER GIVE IT BACK! COME BACK!”

We chased him around the house and Dodger thought it was some sort of game. We had been officially dating for a month. I had started laughing when I caught him and held her headband wig in my hand. She stood their with her arms folded while I petted his head and she rolled her eyes.

"I told you he doesn't like me." She said as I stood up and she took the wig from my hand.

"Come on, he's just getting used to you."

"I've been over here every day. Your dog hates me."

"What?" I tilted my head to the side and touch her nose with my index finger. "Deal breaker? If my dog doesn't like my girlfriend, I'm gonna dump her? Tell me where that makes sense."

She walked closer to me and wrapped her arms around my waist looking up at the ceiling as I kissed her neck. "I guess you have a point." Vanessa sighed.

"He's just warming up to you that's all."

"What's stopping me from breaking up with you?"

"Over a dog?"

"This is his third assault against me. First it was tearing up my purse, then chewing up my crocs, not to mention the little shit I found inside of them. And now stealing my wig and playing cat and mouse." Said Vanessa as I rested my head on top of hers. "Luckily this is a backup wig."

“Aren’t you wearing one right now?” I asked

“Headband wig. And that wig your dog has destroyed,” she gave him the side eye “it was my favorite and expensive.” She gritted her teeth

“I’ll buy you another one.” I offered

She purses her lips and shook her head. “I don’t want you buying me anything. I’ll just break up with you. For real this time.”

"Fine then..." I baited her shrugging my shoulders. "Break up with me."

“Over a dog?” She frowns mocking me as I smile down at her and her eyebrows bend downward a little as she caressed my face. Her finger was gentle and she stood on her top toes and kissed my lips. “Never.”

...

I look over at Dodger and pat his head. "We'll find her. I know we will." I say trying to lift my spirits.

When we arrived to Topanga Park, it was a sight. I didn't even want to leave the truck. I felt my heart race a little more. "What the hell..."

In the middle of traffic-in between the cars were bodies. Dodger started barking at the train of blood that stained the streets. It was empty, but I could feel a heavy weight on my back. Walking behind me, next to me...it was all around me. I hadn't realized I had my hand over my mouth an nose, it was hard for me to breath as the stench of dead bodies. Dodger kept barking and that led to me chasing after him. I had her bonnet in one hand and I called after him.

I came to a halt when I came face to face with another person. He had Dodger in his hands and I felt my muscle tense up. He was tall and very familiar looking. I swallowed the lump in my throat and held the kitchen knife in my hand with a firm grip.

"Captain America?"

I tilted my head sideways and licked my lower lip narrowing my brow a little. "Yeah, give me the dog and we can go our separate ways. Ok?"

He nodded his head. He ran his fingers through his hair and put the dog down. I wasn't really concerned about who he was I was trying to prepare for a fight. He dropped his gun on the ground and held up his his hand.

"I'm not going to kill you. I'm looking for my wife." He said "She left her watch in that building." He pointed to the school and slowly pulled the watch from his pocket.

"In there?" I asked

"Yeah." He nodded, but I still couldn't shake the feeling I knew him from somewhere. "My name is Jared. My wife's name is Gianne, I'm pretty sure she was with someone else-are you looking for someone too? Maybe we could help each other. There was something written on the chalkboard in there, I wasn't something Gia would write, but she was here. All I wanna do is find her-"

"Supernatural?" I asked turning my head to the side. Vanessa loved that show. Whenever she had spare time she would watch it or on those many night she'd spend the night at my house we would watch it-well not really watch it. The Netflix and 'chill' was emphasized. "You said something about some sort of message on the wall?" I asked motioning with my hand. "what did it say?"

"um, CE equals BE or something like that." He shrugged

I laughed a little. Vanessa Evans plus Chris Evans equals Baby Evans. It was a stupid joke-an Easter egg if you will. Shonda put in the show on the whiteboard in one of our love scenes as a way to announce our pregnancy to the audience. She often left clues to the next episode in every episode except this one was not only in the show but in real life.

"Chris Evans." I say extending my hand out to him. I'm pretty sure he knew by the little smile playing on his face. He shook my hand and nodded his head.

"I know. I'm a big marvel fan, I know all your lines." Jared chuckled and then cleared his throat as he nervously laughed. "Nice to meet you. I'm Jared Padalecki - I know I said that already..."

I introduced him to Dodger and I felt a little more relaxed. I gathered that she was alive and we both came to the assumption that they were traveling together.

"Where do you think their headed?" I asked as we walked to his car which was tricked out and full of ammunition and guns. Not to mention government level protective gear.

"While I was in there, I picked up someone else. Heavy footed and big, traveling with dogs. Hair everywhere." He went on tossing me a bullet proof vest. "You heard of Sanctuary?"

"The safety place? Yeah, but it's hard to find. It's for people who get caught in the Purge right?"

He narrowed his brow and shook his head. "No." Said Jared sharply. "Sanctuary is a secret government funded task force. It started off as a conspiracy some myth to explain all the random disappearances throughout the year. It's a government project designed for population control." He went on

"Ok...what does that have anything to do with the Purge?"

"Everything. An organization designed to control the US population. We're talking Pro killers who were once on a leash, but when that horn sounded and the Purge began, they are just as free to kill anyone they want." Said Jared handing me an ipad. It was a list of celebrities. From pro athletes like Steph Curry and their immediate families to movie stars and singers like Rhianna and Tom Cruise. "There are rumors that they are hunting celebrities. The kardashians and Jenner's are fair game. If not the stars themselves then they choose their parents, brothers and sisters."

"And do what?" I asked quietly as I saw mine and Vanesssa picture

"Most get auctioned off to the highest bidder, I've also heard they kill them on the spot for money or bring them in to fight for the death. Bottom line, there is a bounty on our heads. During the Purge everyone is fair game, their is no protection."

"You're telling me she's out there being hunted by them right now?" I asked

“Possibly. The dog hair isn’t a breed we know. They are a combination of hunting canines, bloodhound, foxhound, Labrador retriever with the built and aggression of a something like a pit bull a Rottweiler.” Said Jared as I looked up from the iPad and gave it back. “You’re gonna need more than a kitchen knife. We find the dogs and the hunter and we’ll find them.”

He held a gun out to me and wiped my mouth with the palm of my hand trying to mentally prepare for what is to come."

“Do you believe in the Purge?” I asked still questioning why his car was full of weapons. “You kill people?”

He nodded his head. “Yes. I don’t believe in hiding or waiting for someone to kill me. We all have the right to Purge."

"What's stopping you from killing me?"

Jared sighed and shook his head. "I'm hunting them. I'm surviving and if you decide to threaten my survival, then I'll kill you." He went over to the driver side of his Ford charger. "Get in. Knowing Gia she is headed for Roberts hole."

"What's that?" I asked climbing in the passenger seat of the car.

“It’s a Cassino for celebrities. Jack Black owns it. It’s locked up right but open to his favorites during the Purge.”

“They’ll be there?”

“Relax.” He out his hand in my shoulder and looked at me as dodger sat in the back seat. “We will find them. You know how to shoot don’t you?” Jared raised his gun in the air and nodded my head.

I guess it wasn’t confidently and he chuckled. “Vanessa isn’t a fan of guns.”

“Don’t worry, we’ll practice. Ok?”

.

.

.

.

.

A/N: Sorry it took so long😬 don’t hate me, please. Lol, I hope everyone is doing well and safe out here. If you wanna be tagged leave it in the ask box, Anyways…Untill next time!

Tags!

@Tantricevans

@rosey1981

@toni9

@onceuponahuntersrealm

@pm-my-hubbies

@Cynthetic

@liqourlaughslove

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#chris evans x black women #fangirls #fanfiction #fans #chris evans #fanfics #chris evans fluff #chris evans x black reader #chris evans x poc!reader #chris evans x reader #the purge: sanctuary #the purge fanfic #the purge au #chris evans x pregnant!reader #chris evans imagine #imagines #the purge #pregnant reader

[fangirlovestuff]

Smile - Thor Odinson x reader

a/n - hey lovely people!! this is for this lovely request by @cotton-candy-clouds-26​ , thank you!! i just couldn’t bring myself to write Steve cheating, i love him and i just don’t think he’d do that, but i hope it’s okay. enjoy!<3

Summary: you and Steve break up and it’s rough, but luckily there’s someone out there that helps you get over it. you could say he’s worthy of your affections (i had to hehe)

Word Count: 3k

Warnings: Some curse words and a little angst

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Steve?" you called out, "you ready to go?"

"Just a couple seconds!" he replied, and you sat down on the couch, scrolling on your phone while you waited for him.

It was your six months anniversary, and you were getting ready to go to dinner with Steve. He's been acting a little weird the past few days, and it was starting to raise your suspicion.

Maybe he's getting me a surprise, you tried to shrug your worry off. You knew Steve wasn't that good at keeping secrets, especially from you, and you'd try and get it out of him tonight.

"Ready t-" you began to ask, but stopped once you saw he was wearing a t-shirt and jeans. "Stevie, you know I love your t-shirts," you said, appreciatively eying the bulge on his muscles revealed by the sort, tight sleeves, "but I was under the impression we're going to a fancy restaurant tonight. You know, the kind that won't appreciate anyone, including Captain America, coming in a t-shirt and jeans," you smirked.

"I'm not going," he sighed, sitting down next to you.

"You're not goi- is everything alright? Are you feeling unwell? I mean, I didn't even know you could get ill, but-"

"I'm not sick," he shook his head, "I just… I thought I could give you this one nice night, but I can't."

"What do you mean you can't? Steve, what's going on? Are they calling you on a mission or something?"

"No, no mission. Not today anyway." He took a deep breath before he continued. "I think we should break up."

Your mouth agape, it took you a couple of seconds to register what he just said. You closed your mouth and swallowed. "What?" you asked, your voice nearly a whisper.

"I'm sorry," he said, averting his eyes to the floor, "I just… I don't think I feel the same way about you anymore, and I don't wanna hold you back or anything. I thought the right thing to do was to treat you to a nice dinner before I…" he trailed off, his eyes fixed ahead of him, away from you, "Anyways, I couldn't do it. I didn't want to lie to you, or lead you on. You deserve better than that," his gaze finally turned to you, waiting for your response.

You didn't know what to say. You knew he was acting weird, but you'd have never seen this coming. "So this is it?" you asked disbelievingly. "This is how we end?"

"Look, I'm so-"

"Sorry, yeah, I know." You took a deep breath, willing your tears away. "I think I'll just go home," you got up, getting your stuff.

"Wait, I didn't cancel the reservation. If you wanna go yourself you— can," he called after you, the last word after you'd slammed the door behind you.

Outside of Steve's room, you let out a shuddering breath. He was living in the Avengers compound, so you had to keep yourself together until you got out of here, in case any of them saw you. You started getting outside, but your distracted state of mind probably led you to take a wrong turn in one of the corridors, because now you had no idea where you are.

"Shit," you mumbled under your breath before turning to look around you. You heard what you thought was the noise of a TV from behind one of the doors, and you knocked on it tentatively. You heard some shuffling and then the door opened to reveal none other than Thor. You know, God of Thunder Thor. God of Thunder Thor that was standing in front of you right now, waiting for you to say something because you were the one that knocked on his door.

You willed your brain to go back to functioning. "Um, hi," you said hesitantly, "I was just… I was on my way out of the compound and I got lost. Could you, um, point me in the right direction?"

"Of course," his voice was deep, you could almost feel it rumbling around you when he spoke. "Who are you looking for?"

"Oh, just the exit," you shrugged.

"Alright. I apologized, I just assumed, from the way you're dressed…"

"No, it's alright. I was supposed to go to this fancy restaurant for dinner, but then… anyways, I wouldn't want to go alone," you sighed.

"Well, in that case, would you like me to accompany you? I wouldn't mind dining with a lovely lady such as yourself," he smiled.

"Oh," you blinked in surprise. You weren't really planning on it, but you were actually kinda hungry. And hey, eating in a fancy restaurant with Thor does sound a little nicer than eating at home and wallowing in self-pity. The wallowing could wait. "I mean, if you'd like to," you smiled back at him, "but you'd have to put on a suit, something fancy."

"Oh, I'm sure I have one of those," he said, leaving the door open and heading back inside. "Come in," he said, loud enough for you to hear it. You guessed he headed into the bathroom to change, since when you got in all you saw was the room itself. It was simple, not a lot of personal touches. Makes sense since he's probably not here most of the time, but in Asgard, which would also explain why you hadn't met him yet.

"How's that?" he asked, getting out of the bathroom. The suit was slightly tight on his tall, broad frame, but it was more than okay with you.

"Perfect," you smiled, "we'll blend right in."

You drove the two of you to the restaurant, spending the time making small talk about 'Midgard habits', as Thor called them, or, as you called them, social norms.

When you got there, the hostess smiled at you and asked for the name of your reservation. By that point you had nearly forgotten it, but your shoulders sagged as you mumbled "Steve Rogers."

"I'll let you right in," she smiled and led you to your table.

"Wait, so Steve was going to come with you?" Thor asked once you got to the table. "Are you his girlfriend I've heard so much about from Tony?"

"I'm… not his girlfriend anymore," you said, averting your eyes to the table, playing with the napkin.

"Oh."

"He broke up with me today," you said, your voice breaking before you could get your emotions under control.

"My apologies," he offered, and put his hand over yours, "I know how unpleasant it is to be… broken up with."

"Yeah? Who'd ever dump Thor?" you chuckled, raising your gaze to meet him.

"Quite a few people over the years," he smiled, lighthearted.

"Well, I'm sorry," you squeezed his hand in yours.

When you were waiting for the main course, you had an idea. "Hey, you can't get drunk, right?"

"Not on your Midgardian version of booze, no. Why?"

"Perfect. Hey!" you signaled for a waitress to come over, ignoring Thor's questioning look, "Can we get a bottle of the most alcoholic wine you got here?" you smiled.

If the waitress thought the request was weird, she didn't show it. She just told you how much it costs, which nearly made you give it up but you really needed this tonight.

When you were done ordering it and the waitress went to bring it, you turned to Thor. "I know we just met each other, and this probably isn't the best first impression, but please can you just call me a cab at the end of dinner? Because I'm kinda planning to get drunk."

He chuckled, again making you experience the illusion that you could feel the sound between you. "Of course. If that would help."

"That would help a ton, thank you," you grinned at him, just as the waitress came back with your wine and the first course.

A whole bottle of wine consumed exclusively by you and a few dishes later, you knew it was time to go home. You paid the bill, trying not to freak out at how expansive it was. Thor wanted to pay too, but you assured him that it was fine, and it was you that dragged him out here anyway.

While you were standing outside waiting for a cab you could hail, you shivered a little in the cold.

Steve always gave you his jacket when you got cold.

Maybe it was the drinks, the late hour or just plain old breakup sadness, you felt tears come to your eyes, unable to stop them from flowing out.

You started sniffling and Thor noticed, his head immediately turning to look at you. "What's wrong?"

"He left me, Thor," you cried, "I thought everything was fine and he dumped me. And he was nice about it, so I can't even be mad and blame him, and that just means that," you barely contained your sobs, "it means I'm not enough. Everyone leaves me because I'm never enough." You buried your face in his bicep, too wound up in your misery to even notice how nice it was.

"Now, now," his other hand lifted to stroke your hair. It was a little awkward, but in your inebriated state you couldn't care less. "You're more than enough. I met you today and even I know you're wonderful."

You lifted your head to meet his eyes. Sniffling once again, you tried to stop crying. "Thank you," you said once you felt you gained enough composure. "I'm sorry I sprung all of this on you. I'll get a cab, go sleep it off," you said, awkwardness now prominent. God, you just made a fool of yourself in front of… a god. A literal god. Fuck.

"Where do you live?" he asked, seemingly unbothered. You gave him your address. "Well, I believe it's not that far. Do you need to wait for a cab or can you walk home?"

"I mean, I could walk, it's just that New York City at night isn't the safest place for a girl to walk alone," you smiled awkwardly.

"Oh, yes," he frowned, "I suppose you're correct. I could walk you home, if you'd like?"

You looked around. No cabs in sight. "Actually, yeah. That'd be cool."

The chilly night air sobered you up a bit. Once you got to your building, you bid Thor goodbye, thanking him again, before going up to your apartment and stumbling tiredly onto your bed, where you fell into a dreamless sleep.

The next morning, you woke up still wearing yesterday's dress and with a slight headache, groaning as you got yourself out of bed to shower, change and drink some water, get an aspirin.

Once you had done all that, you checked your phone for any messages. You weren't supposed to come into work today, so you weren't expecting anything, but just to make sure. Surprisingly enough, there was a text from a number you hadn't recognized.

It said it was Thor and he asked how are you, but there was no way that was true, right? I mean, you didn't think Thor even had a phone, let alone your number. On the other hand, you couldn't think of anyone else who'd know enough to text you that.

Skeptical, you texted back that you were fine, not too far from the truth but still kind of far, and were planning to spend the day watching movies and eating ice cream, which was the truth.

How'd you get my number? You texted again before he could answer.

Jarvis had it, he texted back. He's quite useful. I do wonder why he won't leave his room.

You laughed. Either this was actually Thor, or it was someone really, really good. Before you could think up a reply, you saw the three little dots signifying he was typing again.

Would you perhaps want some company while you watch these movies?

You gasped out loud even though there was no one there to hear it. Was Thor really asking to come over and watch movies? With you? It was hard to believe. Maybe it is someone else after all.

You texted him he should come over if he wanted to. Thor knew your address, if it was really him, he'd come over. If it was some crazy stalker, you just wouldn't let him in and continue in your plans of bawling in front of some sappy movies. If it was actually Thor… well, you'd have to cry in front of him, you guess.

You already started on your ice cream and started The Notebook, figuring it was a good way to start your wallowing fest, and you were starting to get really into it when you heard a knock on the door. You moved as quietly as you could towards the door, looking through the peephole. To your momentary relief, it was Thor and not some stalker. Why momentary? Because holy fucking shit Thor was standing at your day and you were in your pajamas.

"Just a sec!" you called out. You figured you didn't have time to change, but you at least tried to get your hair in some sort of order before you opened the door, hiding your PJs clad body with it.

"Hi," you smiled bashfully once you closed the door behind him.

"Hello," he said, smiling. "Ah, I see you've already started. What movie is that?"

"Well, it's called The Notebook. Do you know it?"

He replied that no, he didn't, and you explained the plot briefly to him as you sat down, wrapping yourself back up in a fuzzy blanket before taking your ice cream back.

"Oh, where are my manners, would you like some?" you gestured the ice cream towards him.

"Yes, sure!" he nodded, and you were glad he at least knew what ice cream was. If someone hadn't bothered to introduce him that would just be cruel.

You went to get the ice cream, the blanket dragging behind you like a cape, and you returned with another tub of ice cream and a spoon, bringing them to him before sitting back down and starting the movie.

You two didn't speak much throughout the movie. When it got to the really sad parts you started crying silently, but by the ending you were just fully sobbing, and, as it seemed, so was he.

"That was so… sad," he said, "is this the entertainment Midgardians always enjoy?"

"Not always," you said, stopping to blow your nose, "we have happy things too. It's just, I got dumped last night, so I'd like the chance to cry a little, you know?"

"That's fair. And it was very beautiful. They loved each other."

"They did," you said, your eyes filling with tears again.

"What's next?"

You watched some more sad movies, and then introduced Thor to the wonderful world of takeout food while you changed to some rom com, a little more cheerful. He laughed the whole way through, and the movie wasn't even that funny, but you giggled along as well, unable not to join his roaring laughter.

You ended up falling asleep on the couch in the evening, exhausted, mostly emotionally. The next morning when you woke up he was gone, but he did text you that if you needed anything you could tell him.

Over time, you and Thor started hanging out some more. Mostly at your place or outside, since you really didn't want to risk running into Steve.

It took you time, getting over Steve. Time and tears.  And really, Thor being there helped. A lot. He was a rock, a shoulder to cry on.

A broad, muscular shoulder to ugly cry on.

At first, the thought of starting something with Thor didn't even cross your mind. Sure, he was sweet, but it was platonic, and you were busy getting over your breakup anyway.

But then, you realized it became something… more. To you at least. Because despite the tears, he didn't leave. Never wanted to.

Long story short, when Thor invited you to go to dinner one night, a few months after you met each other, you tried really hard not to think of it as a date. A friend-date, if anything.

"How's it going?" you asked, sitting down in front of him in the small diner.

"Good," he smiled at you, "You?"

"Great," you smiled back.

"So, I have some news," he started, continued once you gave him an encouraging nod, "I have to go back to Asgard in a week or two."

"Oh," you said. It made sense, Thor being on earth as long as he already has been should've raised your curiosity, but you didn't really want to think about it until this moment. "I guess you're happy to go home."

"I am," he hummed, "But… there was something I wanted to ask you before I leave. And be honest. Would you like… well, would you give me the opportunity to court you?"

You sat in stunned silence for a few moments. "Like, you're asking me to date you?" you said incredulously.

"I am," he chuckled nervously, "But you don't have to- I know you might not want to because of Steve and-"

"I haven't thought of Steve for a really long time," you cut him off with a smile, "mostly thanks to you. You make me really happy, and I would love to let you court me," you giggled.

"Really?" he asked, awestruck.

"Really," you smiled, leaning across the table, intending to press a kiss to his cheek. At the last moment he turned, making you plant your lips on his in a soft kiss.

You pulled away smiling, and so was he. He took your hand in his from across the table, and you continued to eat your food like you two usually do. Well, almost. Now there were timid exchanges of looks, gently hand squeezes.

And a breathtaking goodnight kiss.

But it was so natural, so normal, you couldn't bring yourself to admit the absurdity of him being a literal god and you being… just a human.

You spent the week he had left together, making the best of it.

In the future, you'd visit his home, he'd visit yours. And he'll always make sure to remind you you're not just a human, you are, in fact, his favorite one.

It never failed to make you smile.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

this was my first time writing for thor, i hope i did him justice:))

Taglist:  @horny-nd-bored​ @shannon124 @perfectlyharolds​ @wintersoldierslut​ @iceebabies​  @sleepingpapermouse @steverogerswasalwaysworthy @holtzkinnon @angelicl-y @stydia-4-ever @thatoneperson5000 @fangirlfree​ @kaitcordx25 @bequeening​ @steve-barry-damon-logan​ @itscrazycherryblossomcollection​ @hollandxmarvel​ @stargazingfangirl18 @readsreblogsfics @onetwo3000 @beritmetal @harrystylesholland @jazbot2000 @anobscurename @xxxtwilightaxelxxx @peggycarter-steverogers @evansphnx12 @starlightcrystalline @procrastinatingsapphictrash

if you wanna join / be removed from a taglist, comment/message me! much love <3

#thor x reader #thor x you #thor odison x reader #steve rogers x reader #thor odison imagine #thor x y/n #thor x female reader #thor odinson x y/n #thor odinson x you #leila's valentine's sleepover

[hurricaneonanesthesia]

May I request Golden Deer x fem!reader headcanons where her upbringing didn't lend itself to her learning feminine hygiene like shaving or knowing how to braid her hair which makes her insecure and the house notices she never wears short clothes even in sweltering heat? Maybe with Claude x reader undertones?

Of course anon! I’d be more than happy to try my best. I certainly hope that I did them justice! Hopefully they aren’t out of character lol. to be completely honest, i feel like i rushed this towards the end lmao

~Admin Hurricane

Claude von Deer

He didn’t understand it, but you intrigued him

You weren’t like Marianne or Hilda, in fact you were far from it

It surprised him nonetheless when you were wearing long sleeves in sweltering weather

He’d asked you countless times why you weren’t wearing something lighter, but you would always shake your head and continue on with training.

It certainly worried him, when you suddenly fainted one day

He insisted that he be the one to carry you back to the infirmary.

Byleth had to force him to go back to class cause all his pacing outside of the infirmary was giving Manuela a headache.

When you finally woke up, he immediately booked it from the GD classroom and was the first one in

That was when you broke down and told him everything

He listened to every word you had to say, not breaking eye contact once please i love him he’s hubby material why isn’t he real sOB

When you finished he was silent before consoling you and pulling into a hug

He told you that it didn’t matter what your body looks like and that all that mattered was your personality and you as person

That caused you to break down more which made him PANIC lmao

Offered to teach you how to braid hair 

Whenever you guys are training or are in battle, he keeps an eye on you to ensure that you don’t faint again cause of heatstroke 

Advises you to drink plenty of water, STAY HYDRATED!

Ohoho Byleth the matchmaker caught on, and immediately paired the two of you together 

Whenever you’re feeling down cause you don’t seem “feminine enough” or are “too masculine” Claude immediately waves off those bad thoughts

Also to add onto you feeling down, if you were really out of it, he would drag you onto his wyvern and take you out for a ride :))))

Hilda

Hilda squealed when she first saw you, immediately dragging you into her room. 

She tried sprucing you up, but you didn’t really get it as she eagerly showed you different outfits and makeup

She got kinda upset when you stared out the window instead bored out of your mind

Tried to get your attention by waving her hands dramatically in front of you

She was pretty surprised when you opened up to her about why you weren’t interested

From then on Hilda decided to give you some tips on how to do your hair and such

She also gave you advice on clothes to wear, if you were still insecure. Something that won’t cause you to overheat, but is light and long enough to cover up your arms and legs.

Overall she was pretty open as soon as she learned about your circumstances and very willing to help.

Lorenz 

Off topic but Lorenz please change your goddamn pre time skip hairstyle

To be frank, the two of you didn’t get along that well

Why do I say that? Well you didn’t like his womanizing attitude towards other girls and felt that he was too stuck up for his own good

He thought you were too masculine and brutish for your own good and tried educating you which annoyed you to no ends.

Finally one day, when you couldn’t take his pestering anymore you just snapped

He stood there in shock, completely unsure of what to say

From then on he was more aware of what he said to you cause he was worried that what he would say would wound your pride again

Keeps an eye on you because he’s “such a gentleman” hey, his words not mine.

Raphael

Sorry bby, I love you Raph, but he’s a little bit dense 

Doesn’t notice your discomfort at first

Takes you awhile to open up but once you get to know him, he’s more than willing to listen

Being a big bro, he does his best to comfort you and encourage you saying that it doesn’t matter how you act he’s still rooting for you 🥺 BAHA PLEASE I LOVE THIS BIG TEDDY BEAR

Encourages you to wear whatever you like and be proud of yourself 

10/10 wholesome relationship

Bonus: if you still don’t know how to braid your hair, he’ll help do it for you cause he’s had plenty of practice with his younger sis 

Ignatz 

I’d like to think that he’s pretty sensitive and noticed right away

He asked you about why you were constantly wearing long sleeves

At first you weren’t that willing to open up, opting to change the subject and move on

However, as you came to know him more and discovered that his intentions were indeed genuine, you decided to tell him

He was rather surprised at first because he saw nothing wrong with you 

He told you to just continue being yourself and that everyone has flaws

You broke down crying and poor iggy panicked

You eventually stopped crying and thanked him

Since you shared your insecurities with him, he shared his secret hobby and love for painting and you encouraged him to pursue his artistic dreams rather than becoming a knight

Lysithea

She has many secrets herself but she isn’t very sensitive to how others are if you’ve seen her support with Marianne I think you know at first

Once you spend more time with her she notices how you avoid talking much about yourself and your upbringing

Not wanting to pry, she left you alone

Once you got to know her better, you slowly opened up about how you felt and your insecurities

And to your surprise, she listened

She kinda just sat off on the side patting your side unsure of what to say

Since you opened up to her, once you got to know her better, she found that she could trust you and told you abt her secret obviously i'm not gonna say it cause spoilers :)

Marianne

You’re insecure? She’s insecure? HOORAY YOU’RE NOW FRIENDS

Whenever the two of you hang out it’s literally just:

“....”

“.....”

“Um…”

Yeah...it's a little hard to strike up a conversation with Marianne at first

She was fairly curious about why you constantly wore long sleeves tho

"Um...y/n not to be rude, but why do you wear long sleeves? Aren't you hot, i-im sorry if I've overstepped, don't mind me…" 

But the two of you had grown close so naturally also being insecure you told her about your worries

Marianne didn't rlly know what to tell you at first and went all "oH iM soRRy you sHoULdNt bE taLkiNg tO mE bEcaUsE i bRiNg bAd LuCk"

Leonie

In a sense Leonie could relate to you

She told you to mmmm block out the haters and just be yourself

You gained a confidence boost from her cause she was encouraging and told you to just stay true to yourself.

She truly helped you get your walls down and let you know that its okay

Want more of my writing? Be sure to check out my masterlist :)

If you wanna request something, don’t be afraid to send something my way! Thanks for reading and have a lovely day!

#fe3h #fe3h x reader #fire emblem #fire emblem three houses #fire emblem x reader #fire emblem three houses x reader #claude #claude fire emblem #claude fe3h #claude von riegan x reader #claude von riegan #hilda fe3h #lorenz fe3h #raphael fe3h #ignatz fe3h #lysithea fe3h #marianne fe3h #leonie fe3h #sorry this was rushed forgive me :(

[nanaminsonyfans]

✨Birds of a Feather✨

Masterlist ✨ Requesting Rules

Request; Could I request a YJs1 Dick x reader with the reader being new to the team and a protege of black canary? He’s my favourite 🥰

A/N; honestly, if one robin is AT LEAST one of your favorites, if they aren’t in the top three, i don’t trust you. also, i really like the way i wrote this a stuff, if anyone wants i can make this a thing. I fucking grew up on young justice i love these characters. rock and roll buckeroo!

Pairing; Dick Grayson(Robin) x Fem!Reader

Warnings; fluff, slight cursing

Your upbringing wasn’t pleasant, for a short backstory, Black Canary found you when she did a raid on an illegal Meta-Human fighting ring. Your parents sold you to the leader of the ring. Your power was similar to Canary’s, in which your voice was a power. You could mimic sounds around you like a mockingbird, but you had similarities with an owl in the fact that your neck could turn all the way around and you had night vision. Black Canary found you when you were ten, taking you in as her own. She took you under her wing. *dad jokehehuheh*

She had taken care of you for four years, you ever really made you debut as a hero, until Batman started the underground team of sidekicks. Robin of course knew of you, as did Batman because, duh. Well, Roy did too but that was mainly because Green Arrow was dating Canary. He was like a big brother, and he deeply cared for you. 

“And this is Black Canary’s protégé, Mockingbird.” You walked out from the shadows, a black hoodie and red jeans on. Your hoodie had your favorite band one it, whatever it may be. “Sup.” You nod your head at the boys, your hood covered your face since it was dark but you also had glasses on, kinda like Robin’s but they were reading glasses. The glasses could profile anyone and bring up their history, if it’s in the web or files on the cloud, you gotem.

Kid Flash was easy, he didn’t both with covering his face, everyone else was open with you, but not Robin. You glasses always got glitched out when you tried to activate them while looking at him. He knew this and did it on purpose. He didn’t know much about you, only you hero name, you also did that on purpose, it was a fun little battle. You were closer to Robin anyways, being close in age but that didn’t stop Wally from flirting. “Hey babe~ Wanna spar~?” The redhead would ask, before you could speak he would go pale. “Nevermind.” Then he’d run away, you guessed it was Robin, he had mastered the infamous bat-glare.

When Artemis joined the team, you were happy. Another human girl on the team, no offense to M’gann but you felt more comfortable with another human female around. Plus, she was funny. You lived in Star City with Diane and Oliver, and you met her first, it was awesome when you came with her to the Cave and saw all of them shocked.

“What’s up, birdy?” You smile as you trotted over to Robin, you didn’t really have a superhero suit, you kinda took after Black Canary, civilian clothes were your hero clothes. It was usually blood stained black leggings, a navy blue crop top hoodie and black paint around your eyes and bridge of your nose rather than a regular mask because those were itchy. “Do NOT call me that.” Boy Wonder grumbled and elbowed you playfully. You gave him a smirk and batted you eyelashes at him. “You love me.” “No I don’t.” He snorted.

“The Wallman is here!” A redhead yelled through the zeta-tubes as he entered, the loud noise made you yelp and grab onto the nearest person, which was Robin. When you both realized that you both turned red. “Yeesh...stay whelmed Mockingbird.” He finally got out after being frozen. You both had completely ignored the situation going on around you, until...

“Recognize: Speedy, B06.” The computer spoke, making you grinning like an idiot and turn towards the tubes. “Well for starters, he doesn’t go by speedy anymore. Call me Red Arrow.” Your eyes lit up at your brother, well not really brother but you both looked at each other as such. “Roy-” Oliver started but you cut him off. “Roy!” You yelled happily and ran towards your redhead. “Wa to ruin his moment...” Wally grumbled but you flipped him off as you hugged Roy. “Why don’t you call anymore? I’ve been worried. So was Olly, and I guess Robin, Kaldur, and Wally, but I’m your sister!” You whined and teared up, your tears mixing with the paint you used as a mask causing black tears.

“Oh birdie...you know why.” Roy soothed causing you to sniffle and rub your tears away. “Right, sorry.” You mumble and pull away, “Sorry.” You mumbled again and walked back to your spot by Robin, the taller boy put a hand on your shoulder. “Roy, you look-” Oliver started, “Replaceable.” Roy hissed and walked over. “You know it’s not like that.” “Then why bother with a sub? Can she even use that bow?” He gestured angrily to the blonde archer. “Yes she can.” Artemis hissed back. “Who are you?!” Wally whined. “I’m his niece.” “She’s his niece.” “She’s my niece.” Artemis, you, and Green Arrow stated in a matter-of-fact like tone. “Another niece?” Robin snorted, earning an elbow from you.

“But he’s not your replacement!” You chimed in, walking over to the arrows. “We have always wanted you on the team.” Aqualad said, walking over to the now, Red Arrow. “And we have no quota on archers.” The leader continued. “And if we did, you know who we’d pick!” Wally chimed, glaring over at Artemis. “Whatever Baywatch,” Artemis glared, “I’m here to stay.” You stifled a chuckle and looked away. “Baywatch...” You snorted. “But you came here for a reason, right Roy?” You asked when you finally calmed down. “Yeah, a reason named Dr. Sterling Roquette.”

Both yours and Robin’s eyes widened before you both pulled up a file with the holographic computer. “Nano-robotics genius-” Robin started as he began typing. “And claytronics expert at Royal University in Star City! I love her!” You finished and gushed the last part. “Vanished two weeks ago.” Robin continued, earning a frown on your face. “Abducted two weeks ago, by the League of Shadows.” “Woah, you want us to rescue her from The Shadows?” Boy wonder said in a hopeful tone. “Hardcore.” Wally said in awe and fist bumped the other boy. “Dumbasses.” You scoffed and hit them both in the back of the neck. “Roy probably already did that.” You pointed out and walked over to him with a big smile. Roy smiled back and ruffled your hair. “She’s right, I already rescued her. There’s only one problem, the shadows already got her to make a weapon, ‘Doc call it the Fog.” Roy pulled up an image of a dark cylinder looking object with red buttons.

“It’s comprised of millions of microscopic robots, nanotech infiltrators, capable of disintegrating anything in their path- concrete, steel, flesh, bone.- but it’s true purpose isn’t mere destruction. It’s theft. The infiltrators eat and story raw data from any computer system and deliver the stolen data to the Shadows. Providing them access to weapons, strategic defense, cutting edge science and tech.” “Perfect for extortion, manipulation, and power broking.” Artemis starts, earning a groan from Wally, an admiring look from you, and a knowing look from Robin. “Yep. Sounds like The Shadows.” She finishes. “Oh like you know anything about The Shadows.” Wally groans and glares at the blonde, who just smirks. “Who ARE you?!” Wally yells obviously irritated, both you and Robin chuckled a little.

“Roquette’s working on a virus to render the Fog inert.” Roy says, ignoring the childish behavior. “But if The Shadows know she can do that...” Robin started quietly, you gasped softly. “They’ll target her.” You whisper in shock. “It’s okay, right now she’s off the grid. I stashed her in a local highschool computer lab.” Roy shrugs, opening his mouth to speak again. “You left her alone?” Green Arrow asks in shock and mild disappointment. ‘Oh great, here we go again.’ You think as you roll  you eyes. “She’s safe enough for now.” Roy spits and glares at Oliver. “Then let’s you and I take care of that together.” “You and I? Don’t you want to take your new protogé.” The redhead spits again, earning a groan from you. “Roy, you brought this to the team, we’ll talk care of it okay?” You say softly, putting your hand on his shoulder. “And she is part of the team. I promise nothing bad will happen. Trust me, big bro.” You smile, a child like glint in you e/c eyes. “Fine, Y/n. I trust you.” Roy whispered, kissing your forehead before leaving. “Speedy-” The computer started, “Change that to Red Arrow.” You spoke up before Roy could, you winked at him before he left.

Robin knew it was a platonic gesture, you both looked at each other like siblings, he knew that. He fucking knew but a piece of him was jealous. He didn’t know why, maybe he like you? No, he wouldn’t, doesn’t matter anyways. The team had a mission to do. But god damnit he couldn’t stop thinking about it. He wished he could be the one kissing your forehead, holding you, knowing your actual name like Roy did. Damn, being a teenager with feelings fucking SUCKS. 

All of a sudden you all were linked up by Miss Martian telepathy. “Everyone online?” Her voice rung inside your head, causing a giggle. “Mhm.”  You hummed in your head while you sat on a table between Kid Flash and Robin. “Woah, this is weird.” Artemis said, in her head of course, and you just giggled in response. “I know right? Prepare for a killer headache when Megan cuts it off!” You giggled more as you popped some of Wally’s fruit snacks in your mouth. Then the doctor started complaining. “Lady, I’m not really diggin your attitude right now.” You say while rolling your eyes. “You literally look like some random kid they got from the street!” The doctor replied earning a huff from you as you sat up straight. 

“You literally look like some random kid they got from the street.” You said, using your mocking power, you spoke in her exact voice, earning a shocked look from her. “Now shut the fuck up.” You hissed in your normal voice, earning a stern look from Aqualad. “Oh don’t judge my language fish boy.” You grumbled and crossed your arms, looking through a blind. “Do you always act like this when people try to help you?” Wally’s voice rung in your head. “Pot, kettle, you’ve met?” Artemis replied, you snickered slightly. “Great, now I want kettle corn. Thanks Art.” You whined and then ignored them arguing until Robin spoke. “You should give her some more credit. It was /her/ arrow that saved you from Amazo.” Robin said with a smirk, in which you practically swooned. “No, it was Spee-Red Arrow’s arrow, right?” “Not so much.” Robin snickered and you did as well. 

“God I love his voice.” You thought and then you realized that everyone was connected, SHIT. Your eyes widened and your face turned red. “I mean haha, I was thinking of something else.” You got up. “I’ll...I’ll go an patrol the halls...hall monitor duties.” You got up. “Oh god oh god. This is so embarrassing.” You though as you messed with your fingerless gloves. “Should we tell her?” Wally’s voice rang in your head, you could feel him smirking. “THEN DON’T LISTEN!” You screamed from the hallway and you could hear his laughs. Everyone basically knew you had a crush on Robin, it was obvious to everyone but him. He felt the same, it was also obvious to everyone but you. This was not the TIME.

You were walking down the hall, until you heard footsteps behind you. You turned around, punching the figure and wrapping you legs around the person’s waist as you pinned them down. “Woah woah, stay whelmed, Mockingbird.” You squeezes you legs tighter when you realized it was Robin. “What do you want?” You whisper-shouted. “You seemed to be distraught. You really should get traught.” He gave you a smirk that you always melted over. “Mind not squeezing me to death?” He asked and you flushed as you let him go from you thighs crushing him. 

“Your wordplay is so stupid...” You smiled softly and tucked a piece of hair behind your ear. “So what? You said you love my voice.” Robin teased. “I do.” You sighed and then covered your mouth in shock. “I-I mean...shut up!” Robin bit his lip and rubbed the back of his neck. “I have to head out with Superboy.” He mumbled in which you sighed and grabbed his wrist before he could leave. “Be safe okay?” You whisper softly, getting closer to him. His lips were inches away from your. Robin smiled and kissed your forehead. “I’ll try.” He smiled in which you turned so red you were sure you would’ve been glowing. “It’s Y/n...Y/n L/n.” You spoke up as he started to walk away. “That’s my name.” You mumble. He turned around, wide eyed. 

“Y/n L/n eh? That’s a pretty name.” Robin teased before running off.

#young justice #young justice x reader #young justice robin #robin x reader #dick grayson x reader #wally west x reader #superboy x reader #aqualad x reader #roy harper x reader #red arrow x reader #young justice robin x reader #robin x reader fluff #fluff #young justice fluff

[desertofsnowflakes]

Incorrect Order Chapter 4 (Nessian AU)

A/N: I know I haven't been able to update as fast as you'd want me to but I'll try to fix that. Your comments and feedbacks are very much appreciated. Do inform me if you wanna be added/removed from the taglist! If you happen to find my storyline similar to another fic or one of yours, I'm extremely sorry, I might've just not known. All characters belong to the author Sarah J. Mass. Enjoy!

Summary: Don't first impressions always affect the way you see someone? Well, what more with the Nesta Archeron? Nesta meets Cassian at few unexpected places and to say it didn't go well was a major understatement. Certain circumstances make them become enemies to tolerable company to friends to lovers.

Trigger Warnings: None really

1652words | Incorrect Order Masterlist | Read on AO3

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The best way to keep whatever problems one has out of their mind was to do something they liked. That was the only way Cassian kept from spiraling. Since sending the woman to her own house, Cassian had more than a few moments when he wanted to repeatedly slam his head against a wall. That’s why he spent most of his time sparring with Azriel. He won’t admit he was simping for that woman in his free time too. Or maybe that was always.

Now, sprawled on a couch in front of the TV, with nothing to do but stare at a blank screen, Cassian led his thoughts to the box he kept all unwanted thoughts locked in. He thought about Tomas, her ex-boyfriend. Funny, he thought. I know her ex's name but not hers.

It took him a little too long the other day to realise they didn't exchange names. Again. He once thought that maybe she was purposely not giving him her name. That maybe, for her, he was just a random stranger who happened to save her life. He snorted. Surely anyone would know the name of the person they saved or was saved by— stranger or not. He supposed he'll have to make do with pronouns for now.

After she left his home, it took every scrap of self-restraint not to beat this Tomas dude to pulp and let him rot in the same alley he had the misfortune of meeting him in. He may or may not have been the cause for some extra injuries. Cassian appreciated the woman’s attempt at mercy. He, however, didn’t trust Tomas at all. He was dubious about just handing him over to the police. Who’s to know he won’t frame him and the woman for absurd things? Anyway, he left a note in Tomas’s house saying something like “Step out of line, lose your favourite part of anatomy. Name it and have it for your meal.” He made sure he printed so that no one would recognise his writing. Yet, all this didn’t calm his nerves one bit. He presumed he’ll have to stay on guard for some time now.

Now, back to the girl. He sighed. He didn’t dare change the sheets in his guest bedroom. He didn’t even let Mor use the room when she came over last weekend— which he could bet created suspicion. No, that room was only open when he craved her scent. He even realised one of his shirts was missing. He shrugged it off thinking he would've left it somewhere and just couldn't find it. Once she came to his house, he was constantly thinking about her. So much that now he started pinching himself often. It was the only way he could stop thinking about her— by creating physical pain.

Cassian glanced at the clock on the wall. 2.30 in the afternoon. He walked to the refrigerator and checked his freezer compartment. Huh. No ice-cream. He sighed, grabbed his jacket and keys and headed to the mall to get an ice-cream with a pout. He’ll have to leave for Rhys and Feyre’s first anniversary only around 5.30 to prepare everything. He has enough time to get an ice-cream and probably hang out for some time. Good enough to stop thinking about her. Or so he thought.

***

Nesta wasn’t sore anymore. Her headache was gone almost a week after the incident. Her nose didn’t hurt anymore. Okay, maybe a little bit. It didn’t hurt unless she bumped her nose against something. Today, her nose was dully throbbing because she hit her nose against a pillow yesterday. A very, very soft pillow and yet it hurt this much.

The man’s first-aid and medicines were really helpful.

It really wasn’t fair that he excelled at basic first aid too. It wasn’t fair that he looked so good. With black tattoos swirling over generously muscled arms and shoulder-length dark hair curling at the edges and gloriously tanned skin and hazel eyes with minute flecks of green and brown when taken a closer look at and dimples and—

A quiet “Who is it?” snapped Nesta out of her moping. She looked up to see Gwyn walking to her.

“Who is what?” she asked, feigning nonchalance. Gwyn's pursed lips and glare conveyed that her act wasn't enough.

“Who are you thinking about?” Gwyn clarified.

“What makes you think I'm thinking about someone?” Nesta retorted.

Gwyn sat on the chair next to her and started assisting with classifying the unceremonious heap of books on the table to be kept back in its correct positions on its own rack.

“Nesta,” Gwyn sighed, “Clotho assigned you this stack almost an hour ago. And you've barely finished a third of the stack. Normally, you'd finish stacks bigger than this in an hour. So there's clearly something.”

“It wasn't anyone,” Nesta mumbled.

As usual, Gwyn saw through her lie. “You were twirling your hair,” she said flatly.

Heat inched up her neck. “I was not!”

Gwyn murmured a “uh-huh” and they lapsed into an easy silence till they were almost over.

Gwyn's eyes lit up as it normally did whenever she got an idea. “Is it him? The guy you came with that day?”

Nesta scowled, “How do you know…” she broke off when she realised which 'that day' Gwyn was talking about. Nesta fought back a blush. “No, no, this isn't about him. We don't know each other. Much. Like, we've seen each other a number of times? That's it. Nothing else.” Cauldron, the first part was a complete lie. But at least the rest are true. Will Gwyn happen to know his name? Maybe I ought to ask her. Or maybe I shouldn't.

She should, she decided. She cleared her throat. “Uh, Gwyn? Do you happen to know his name?”

Gwyn frowned and asked, “He hasn't told you yet?”

Nesta shook her head and answered, “No, we, uh, forgot. I guess. We haven't really exchanged names.”

Gwyn nodded and smiled. “Well, he is—”

“Gwyn!” a voice called. “You can't expect me to come over to you and beg for you to help me. Help me only if you want to or don't work under me.”

Gwyn’s eyes widened. She abruptly stood up and mouthed, “Merrill. I gotta go. I’m so sorry.” She all but ran to Merrill, the very strict librarian Gwyn was working under.

Nesta sighed and continued her work. There wasn’t much left so she was able to finish fast. She picked her things and left the library with a word to Clotho, heading to the mall.

***

The best way to keep whatever problems one has out of their mind was to also eat something they liked. So, ice-cream it was. After having his ice-cream, Cassian was aimlessly walking around the mall. Here, not more than a month ago, he met her for the first time. Almost a month ago. He huffed out a breath. The fact that he was pining for her this long blew his mind off. He—

“This is your fault— not mine. I’m not taking the blame for this,” he told her. They bumped into each other. Again.

Her lips quirked up. “It is kind of my fault. But blame this—,” she poked his chest, “— for making my nose hurt again.”

Just like that, his mood sobered. “How are you?” he asked.

She pointed at the cafe to her left. “Coffee?”

He nodded. Who was he to say no to her?

So they ordered coffee and talked about everything and nothing. He grinned and she laughed. He laughed and she smirked. He wouldn’t say he knew her well but he’d never seen her so carefree. Her laugh was like nectar for a starving man. Her eyes bright and welling up with tears from laughing.

“I don’t think I’ve laughed this much,” she said.

Cassian put a hand on his heart dramatically and said, “I know, I know. I’m very funny.”

Her lips kicked up a notch. She straightened as if she just realised something. He was about to ask when she drawled, “So I just realised that we still haven’t exchanged names.”

Oh. Right. Of course. “Yeah,” he nodded. “Usually, when people meet, they start with introductions but in our case we’ve literally bumped into each other three times and still we don’t know each other.” He shook his head and extended his hand. “Well, hello there. I’m—”

His phone rang in his pocket. Fuck. He was going to kill whoever was calling him now. He was so close to knowing her name. He pulled out his phone to see an incoming call from Azriel. He apologetically looked up at her and said, “I’m sorry. I wish I could choose not to take this call and instead kill this idiot but I can’t. Just give me a moment, okay?”

She nodded and he picked up his call.

“What do you want?” he hissed.

“It’s 5.30 already, you idiot. We’ve got to get the things ready for the party. Mor already went to get the cake and you’re not even at home. Where on all earth and hell are you?” came Az’s faint voice.

“15 minutes only? Mother above, I’m coming.” he said.

Az’s “make it fast” was the last thing he heard before hanging up. “I wish we could stay here and talk forever,” he said to her, “but I have something up in a short while and I totally didn’t realise time was passing this fast. I’m so sorry. It was nice talking to you. Really. And I wish we could meet again. Though without the bumping part.”

He grinned when she smiled and said, “Bye. Have a nice day.”

“You too,” he called back. He didn’t want to think he imagined the subtle look of disappointment on her face because hell, he was a walking epitome of disappointment right now.

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[captaincravatthecapricious]

Psychosomatic- Prompt Fill

Soooo I forgot to fully read the prompt, so this isn’t season 2.  Sorry!  Have a bit of a follow up to my broken ribs fic!

cw nausea, vomiting (brief mentions), headaches, migraines, injury, anxiety, fever, oh and Jon is kind of gaslighting himself a little

And I have finished all my bingo prompts, but I plan on choosing another prompt list soon, so keep an eye out if you wanna make some requests! And the rest of the bingo fics will be out soon (I tend to post on Wednesdays, but I make no promises for consistency).  Thanks again to @celosiaa​ for the wonderful bingo card!

“Jon?  Are you sure about this?”

That’s Martin talking to him.  He ought to pay attention.  

Jon wonders if there is a correct answer to the question.  There probably is, if he can think through the headache.  

Think.  

He is at Martin’s flat, has been for about a week.  

Martin is finally going to let him back to work.  Partly because he is starting to heal, and even so there isn’t much you can do for broken ribs.  Partly because Jon needs to save the world, and he has been doing his all the convince Martin of this.  There is also that terrifying thing about needing Statements now.  Not that he really wants to share that with Martin.  Because Martin is the only one who actually cares anymore and he could ruin it if Martin were to… He doesn’t know.  His chest is tight.  Partly from the pain, partly from anxiety.  

Stress, that’s why he feels like shit.  

Stress.  All in his head.  

Christ he has to answer before Martin gets concerned.  

“Yes.  I’m fine, Martin.  You can stop fussing.”  Does that sound like him?  How brusque is he normally?  Does this fall under the typical Jon being an arse (which… he feels very badly about but at this point what does he even say?  They had a few moments …but he never knows what to say now or he’s in too much pain or under too much stress to really be a good conversationalist, and being rude is better than …no it isn’t.  He’s just afraid of letting Martin get too close?).

Christ his head is pounding, and it isn’t like he’s done anything.  

Just the stress.  

Probably.  

Stress or statements.  

He’s fine.  

“It’s just… are you sure?  You look a bit peaky.  And you do need to be gentle with your ribs so they heal, so you don’t, you know puncture a lung and die or something.”

Jon dodges Martin trying to feel his forehead and hisses with pain.  He batts Martin’s hand away instead, pressing his other to his rib cadge.  

If he’s running a fever…  It’s probably just the pain.  He’s been in a lot of pain.  Ribs and now this headache, witch, could easily become a migraine.  

He wonders if he has Excedrin in his office, or hidden in the stacks with what’s left of his belongings.  

“I’m fine.  Just… worried about the Unknowing.  I’m trying to save the world, but had to take some time off… a bit hard to relax with that over my head.  You’re no stranger to anxiety, I’m sure you know the feeling.”  Shit.  Is that too personal?  Was the insensitive?  It’s a bit difficult to ignore, even for Jon, that Martin struggles with anxiety.  He’s seen the prescriptions by the bed, and around the Archives when Martin was living there.  He wasn’t really invading.  Not like he had back….  No.  It’s fine.  He’s fine.  No the anxiety certainly isn’t twisting in his core now, sloshing his insides.  Just the stress.  It’s fine. 

Martin sighs.  “Yeah.  Yeah… I do.  And it isn’t going to get better if we sit around here, is it?  But, you’ll let me know if working doesn’t make you feel better, yeah?  You still need to take it easy.  You aren’t better yet.”  

Jon purses his lips.  Not sure how to answer without outright lying.  “I’ll do my best?  It’s all a bit muddled?  Ribs hurt so it’s hard to sleep.  Stress makes it harder to sleep.  Stress and not sleeping lead to a headache.  Which won’t get better until I sleep, which I can’t do until I can make some progress at work so we all don’t literally die.  Christ, I’m sorry.  Let’s just go.  I’ll have a lie down after I read a Statement and do a bit of research, how about?  I… appreciate what you’ve done for me, but I’m imposing and probably putting you in danger, and I’m not the easiest person to live with…”

“It’s no trouble.  It’s… nice having someone else here.  I’m glad you let me look after you.”

“Not really like I had much of a choice, but I’ve had worse kidnappings.”

Martin makes a face.  

Jon worries he’s gone too far with a joke that isn’t all that funny.  “Sorry.”

“Let’s just go.  Sooner we leave the sooner I can get you back here and resting.  Yes Jon, I am bringing you back here if you’ll let me.  It’s actually less stressful when I know where you are so I can be sure you haven’t been kidnapped again.”

Jon can’t really argue with that.  

The tube may have been a mistake.  

It’s crowded, and there aren’t any open seats, and no one seems to care that he’s carrying a cane.  And while he could probably ask… he won’t.  Martin tries to shield him from the worst of the crown, but it’s the lighting.  Scraping at the backs of his eyes, threatening him with a migraine.  It’s the jolting of the train between stops where he stumbles because he can’t lift his free hand high enough to grab one of the grips without it tugging painfully on his ribs.  Martin tries to hold him steady, but it isn’t enough.  And to make it worse, Jon is certain that every eye is on him.  He’s small but conspicuous.  Messy hair, cane, scars, limp.  

Is it just his paranoia?  Is it the eye?  Is he just tired?  He doesn’t know, but it makes him want to curl up as tightly as he can, ribs be damned, and get out of sight.  It makes him feel sick.  

Martin tuts gently when Jon almost whimpers at the next judder of the train.  “Should have called a cab.”

Jon shakes his head.  “I’d rather be jostled than carsick.”  

Martin glances at him in concern.  Probably assessing the likelihood of Jon getting sick in the carriage.  

Jon wishes that weren’t a valid concern.  

He’s fine.  

It’s the headache.  It’s the stress.  He’ll read a Statement, he’ll do some research, he’ll take a nap if he needs to, but he should be feeling better by then.  

Martin checks on him every half hour or so.  It’s… distracting.  

And concerning.  

The Statement didn’t help.  He still feels dizzy and sick, and the headache has only gotten worse.  He wants to turn off the lights, but sitting in one position, trying not to vomit from the pain has made his ribs stiff.  Stiff to the point that he isn’t sure he can move.  

He tries to do research, but the words start swimming on the page.  Shit.  Is this even stress?  Is he just having a shitty day?  Is he sick?  He can’t afford to be sick.  If he has to recover from an illness that puts him even farther behind.  No.  It’s just stress.  Stress migraine.  

Probably.  

The Statement didn’t help.  Not enough anyhow.  

He doesn’t want Martin to see just how badly off he is.  Can’t bear the disappointed look, the worrying.  Martin has worried enough.  Jon just wants to hide.  To be miserable in peace, just like has has done for years.  But he doesn’t have flat now.  He has a few clothes and a toothbrush at Martin’s flat now.  He has the same at Georgie’s.  And he has a shelf with some blankets and a few boxes of things from his flat in the stacks.  Far enough back, and semi covered by a tarp that he’s not yet been discovered there.  

He should go there, if he can.  Curl up in his nest of blankets and pillows, see if he can find some Excedrin, and hope that helps.  

He should eat something before the meds, but he’s nearly overcome with nausea when he leavers himself to standing.  Has to detour to expel what little Martin made him eat that morning.  He limps to his shelf.  And nearly cries when he has to try to get himself on in without hurting his ribs more.  

Sneaking off before Martin can notice just how sorry a state he is in.  

He manages to sleep.  Deeply.  Painkillers helping enough that he can pass out for a couple hours.  Probably.  His head still hurts too much to look at his phone.  Enough that he shouldn’t try moving, but he’s certain Martin must be out of his mind with worry.  But…

But he can’t move.  His ribs hurt too much.  And trying to sit up makes him nauseous enough to wonder if he has anything to be ill into should the need arise.  

He wants to sleep more.  He wants to sleep long enough to find the Tim of last year to find him.  He misses his friend.  He wants the old TIm.  He wants the old him.  He wants to be dragged upright at his Research desk by Tim and for Tim to demand to know why he’s at work in such a sorry state.  

He wants Martin to find him.  

He wants Sasha to.  

(He wants his mother to).  

He feels too poorly to pull the blanket up, so he shivers, whimpering a little when that jostles his ribs, jostles his migraine.  

He drifts.  Too nauseous, too achey to really sleep.  

He almost doesn’t hear Martin searching for him.  Sounding tired and worried.  Calling his name, and presumably checking all the rows, all the shelves for somewhere Jon might have tucked himself.  

Jon wants to call back, but the minimal noise Martin is making hurts too much to think about responding.  He’ll find him soon enough.  Probably.  Jon isn’t feeling well enough to disguise his hideaway.  Even if that makes him feel dreadfully exposed.  (Vulnerable to Daisy and Elias and even Melanie and Tim on their more aggressive days).  

He drifts more, as Martin draws closer.  

Jon wakes properly to Martin feeling his forehead.  Brushing a few stray tears away.  Tutting at the fever Jon presumes he is running.  “Oh Jon, why didn’t you say something?  I’ve been so worried.  Burning up, we ought to get you home.”

Jon is ashamed to say he whimpers at the thought of moving.  “Hurts.”  It’s slurred and pathetic.  

Martin shushes him gently.  “Is it alright if I lift you?”  

“Careful.”

“I will be,” Martin promises.  

And he is. 

It still hurts.  

And the cab ride makes him sick.  

But then it’s over and he’s back in Martin’s bed, and he can’t make himself worry about anything anymore.  

#the magnus archives #tma #jonathan sims #jonmartin #martin blackwood #fanficiton #cw nausea #cw vomiting #cw injury #cw fever #cw anxiety #fic #my fic #my writing #my words #art #my art

[emmy-writes-sometimes]

Hesitate

You’re going through a depressive episode, but your boyfriend Sebastian is going to help you as much as he can. Title inspiration: Hesitate by the Jonas Brothers 

Pairing: Sebastian Stan x female reader

Warnings: Depression, suicidal thoughts, small mention of self-harm. Please do not read if this triggers you! 

-

Sebastian wrestled his key into the door of your apartment, growing even more frustrated by the second when he couldn’t get it to turn. Finally he heard it click and your door opened. He grabbed the key out of the door and placed the set of them on the hook you kept by the door. He didn’t quite know what to expect when he opened your door, but he hated what he saw. 

You lived in a small studio, even though you stayed at his house most of the time. He’d gone out of town and you’d gone radio silent, which was completely unusual for you - normally you were sending him funny memes, asking him how his day was, or FaceTiming him with your smiley face. But while he was checking back in his apartment in New York for the weekend, you’d stopped. And he knew it couldn’t be a good sign. Over the time he’d known you, he knew you struggled with depression and he understood it because he did, too. But he’d never been with you through a manic episode, at least not one like this. He didn’t know what to expect, but this definitely wasn’t it. 

Your kitchen was wrecked, even though you clearly hadn’t used it in a long time. Dishes and trash were piled in the sink and on the counter, making the kitchenette look even smaller. One of the chairs was toppled over, probably something you’d done out of frustration because your bag and its contents were scattered across the floor, too. You hadn’t tried to do your laundry and the hamper was beyond full. Your TV was on and had been playing for a long time, he assumed, because the remote was across the room on the media stand. The couch was a mess, too. You were a lump in bed, curled up so small that he didn’t even see you at first. 

“Babe?” He asked. You finally opened your eyes, wiping the little yellow-green pieces of crust out of them, and turned over your sore body when you heard his voice. You tried to sit up, but you didn’t feel strong enough, so you didn’t. 

“Hey, I thought...” Your head suddenly throbbed and you shut your eyes, taking a second to think about what you wanted to say. “I thought you weren’t coming back ‘till Thursday?” 

“Sweetheart, it is Thursday,” he muttered. “Have you... been here since the weekend?” Your heart started pounding, right away. You started sweating, your stomach churning. You felt sick. 

“What? No, it’s...” Your voice trailed off. He had to be playing a trick on you or something. There was no way it was Thursday. The two of you had gone out for brunch, and then you’d dropped him at the airport, and he said he would see you on Thursday night when he got home. You swirled around, grabbing your phone, only to find that it was dead. Sebastian walked closer to you, taking his shoes off, and he got on the other side of the bed. 

“Have you been here all weekend?” He asked again. “Baby, do you feel okay?” He put a hand to your forehead, trying to figure out why you’d been in bed all this time. Part of him knew it had to be the depression, but he’d never seen you this bad. He’d never seen anyone this bad before. You started crying as soon as he shook his head, clicking his tongue to say you didn’t have a fever. 

“I’ve literally missed a week of work, I’m gonna get fired, I’m gonna lose my job and then the apartment and then...” Sebastian put his hands under your legs and your back and pulled you into his lap as you burst into tears. 

“Shh, shh,” he tried to calm you down. “It’s okay.”

“No! I’ve missed a whole week of work because I was too depressed to get out of bed. I just ruined... You probably think I’m crazy now. I ruined everything.” 

“No, sweetheart, you didn’t ruin anything,” he said softly. “But I want you to be honest with me. Did you know you were in bed all this time?”

“No.” 

“Have you been eating at all? Or showering?”

“I... I guess not.”

“You haven’t even been to the bathroom?”

“I don’t remember the last time. I kind of have to.” Sebastian sighed and hugged you, tightly, listening to you cry for a minute. “I’m sorry.” 

“Don’t apologize. Let’s just get you cleaned up and we’ll figure all this out, alright? I’ll call your boss,” he said as he started to rub your back up and down. “I’ll call your boss right now and talk to her. And then I’ll make you some of that pasta you like. And then I’ll help you clean this place up, okay? I’m staying here tonight.” You listened to his plan and were only able to nod in response. You sniffled a little, but the first bit of crying was over. He told you to get up so you did, and you gave him your computer password to find your boss’s number. You nearly cried again when you saw all of the missed messages and emails, but you didn’t have time to deal with it. 

You entered the bathroom just as you heard Sebastian start calling your boss. You must have been in bed all of that time because your dirty clothes were the same they’d been because you always did your laundry on Saturdays. You started the shower, even though you felt like you might either throw up or faint or maybe both. You were shaking as you reached for your face wash, noticing that you’d started developing acne. The mirror you kept in the shower showed bloodshot eyes, puffs underneath them, skin that was suffering from not being taken care of. How could you let things get this bad, you thought. How could you possibly let yourself do this? 

Just as you were about to pump some onto your hand, the door opened. Sebastian. 

“Mind if I join you? I need to shower the airport off,” he said. You nodded, opening the curtain. His eyes checked you up and down, able to tell that you’d lost a little weight from not eating. And then you were ashamed again, backing into the corner of the shower as he took off his clothes. Normally when he came back you jumped at the chance to do things with him, but now you just wanted to hide. You were sure he was ashamed of you, he had to be. Right? 

“Don’t hide. It’s okay. Let me get you,” he insisted. He got underneath the stream of water and pulled you into a tight hug. The water was just hot enough as it beat against your back. You wrapped your arms around his waist, burying your face in his chest. He gave you a kiss on the forehead before taking the face wash from you. His fingers were incredibly gentle as they rubbed over your cheeks and your forehead, then let the milky white cleanser fall off your face. He continued to help you with your hair routine, then let you wash yourself as he washed his hair. The two of you showered together often, and this was no different. 

“Am I fired?” You asked eventually, just as Sebastian was about to shut off the water. He shook his head, wringing out a little of the hair he’d been growing out for another role. 

“No. Your boss said she just wants you to call her when you get the chance. I talked to your mom, too, and she said...” 

“No.” You already knew what he was going to say, and you hated the idea. “No, don’t.” 

“You don’t know what I’m going to say.” He shut the water off and started wrapping a towel around your body for you. You noticed him looking at your arms as he did so, and you jerked yourself away from him like an angry child.

“Yes, I do. You’re going to say that you’re afraid I’m going to hurt myself or kill myself and you don’t want me around and...” You could feel yourself beginning to lose control. You were suddenly angry, so angry that you wanted to push him and scream, but you didn’t. There was a burst of energy in you, for the first time in days, and a fire that burned in your chest and threatened to come alive. Sebastian knew what was happening because he just let you go. You walked into the other room and started pulling a t-shirt on, trying to forget about everything you were feeling. You put on a pair of shorts and then you couldn’t contain it anymore - you sat down on your bed and started crying, for real this time. 

“You want me to come cuddle with you?” Sebastian asked. “If you wanna do this alone it’s okay.” You shook your head, looking up at him. He had tears in his eyes. You knew you were hurting him by pushing him away and then pulling him back, and you hated hurting him. But you couldn’t help but wonder if that was all you were doing. 

“You don’t want me anymore,” you concluded out loud. He looked confused. “You’re gonna tell me that you’re worried about me but you can't deal with me because I’m too much and I need constant reassurance and I need... And I’m jealous, and I’m everything you don’t want, and...” Your voice was lost in a sob. Your heart was starting to hurt so badly and you didn’t know if it was because of everything you’d gone through or if it was the thought of losing the person you trusted the most in the world. 

“Baby, I want you,” he said softly. “I wasn’t gonna say any of that. I promise. Just come here.” You let him take a seat next to you and pull you into him. He let you cry for what felt like hours before you were finally done. You had a headache. Your nose was stuffed up. Your eyes stung from the way you rubbed at them when you were upset. It wasn’t a pretty kind of cry. But you were done crying, finally. Sebastian moved you onto his lap, sitting back in the bed, letting you lay there for a few minutes. You took in the sound of his heart beating, the gentle throbbing of it in his chest as it rose up and down. You took in the way that he was rubbing your back, shushing you in a calm voice. 

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t apologize to me. Stop apologizing to me. I was going to tell you that your mom and I are worried about you. And that we both thought it might be a good idea if you go back to see your therapist. And, if you want, we can try and get you on some medication to make you feel a little better. Maybe give you some more energy to get through the day. I want you to come stay with me for a while so I can watch you. But I need you to be honest with me right now, baby.”

“About what?” You sniffled. 

“Have you ever thought about hurting yourself at all?” 

“I’ve thought about it. But I don’t... I’m scared to. So I won’t.” He nodded. It wasn’t the answer he wanted to hear, it was an answer nobody wanted to hear, but it was the best thing you could’ve said to him in that moment. 

“Good. That’s so good. How about I start making you something to eat? And you can start cleaning up a little bit. If you’re up to it we’ll go back to my place. If not we’ll go in the morning.” You sniffled and nodded, trying to find the energy to get up. He kissed your temple two or three times, muttering that he loved you.

Eventually you got up and started changing your sheets. You started folding your clothes, picking up the stool that had fallen, and organized your desk. You cleaned your toilet and the shower, then the kitchen. Around the same time, Sebastian had finished making food for you. You didn’t even realize how hungry you were until you ate all of it. 

You helped Sebastian clean up the dishes and then you were packing a bag to go stay at his house. You finally flipped the light off in your apartment and gave Sebastian your car keys so he could drive. He had been so concerned that he came straight from the airport - he hadn’t even gone home to change clothes or anything. 

“You know I love you, right?” He asked as he stopped at a light. His right hand snaked over to you, grabbing onto the inside of your thigh, his thumb rubbing against the skin you’d just put lotion on before leaving. 

“I want to believe you do, but it’s hard,” you muttered in complete honesty. “I feel so un-lovable like this.” You sniffled, not wanting to get into another pity parade but still wanting to be honest with him. 

“I know you do. But I love you. I love you and we’re gonna get through this, okay? Together. I’ll do whatever you need me to do, sweetheart, I swear. I just want to help you get better.” You leaned against his arm, shutting your eyes. Eventually you heard him pull into his garage and you got out, bringing your bags inside. 

“I guess I should probably try to work some,” you thought out loud, realizing how much work must be sitting in your email inbox. You were only doing office administration stuff, but it could still pile up while you weren’t working. 

“Yeah? I need to get some sleep. How about you try to get a little work done and then come and join me. We’ll go for a long walk tomorrow morning, and then we can go get coffee at your favorite place?” You nodded. He walked into the kitchen and pulled out a fresh, chilled bottle of water, before walking back over to you. 

“Thanks,” you said. He must have known you were thirsty from all of your crying. 

“I want you to drink this whole thing before you come to bed, okay?” He instructed. “It’s not healthy that you’re this dehydrated.” 

“Okay.”

“Good girl.” Your whole body tightened at hearing him say those words - normally he said them in another context, but right now it was what you needed. You were so lucky he knew that. You walked upstairs with him and went into his office while he went into the bedroom, starting to get through some of your work. You didn’t understand how you could be so tired after sleeping for almost a whole week, but you were. 

You crawled into bed with him at 3:05 AM. You remembered that time because you looked at the clock on your phone, realizing that while you were gone earlier he’d changed the lock screen to a post-it note you always kept on your desk. One he’d written you. It said I love you, baby. X Your Seba. Your heart melted as you looked at it, putting it down on the nightstand. Then you got into bed beside him, worming your way into his arms. 

“Seba?” You said. He was obviously awake because he wasn't snoring, and when you said his name he tightened his grip on you. “Thank you for taking care of me. I love you.”

“It’s my job, baby. I miss seeing you smile. I miss seeing how happy you are to see me when I get back. I miss hearing your voice. I miss you.”

“I missed you, too.” 

“And I promise you. I won’t hesitate. Anything you need, I’ll give you.”

A/N: This was... a lot. And probably the most true to life thing I think I’ve written, at least in my experience with depression. If you’re going through the same thing, it gets better. Trust me. ❤️

Taglist: @an-adventureland, @ssebstann, @firstangeldragonranch, @winterreader-nowwriter, @eviemarvel 

#sebastian stan x reader #sebastian stan x female reader #sebastian stan fluff #sebastian stan angst #sebastian stan imagine

[twdbegins]

A Friendly Feud

__

Simon x Fem. Reader

Warnings: None.

Word Count: 1,759

“Is that really what you want?”

__

He infuriated you. He knew exactly how to push your buttons, and push your buttons he certainly did. It was almost like he went out of his way to mess with you. As if he had nothing else on his schedule except pestering you. He was extremely persistent, you’d give him that. 

It seemed like you saw him more than anybody else at the Sanctuary. You didn’t even see Negan as much as you saw Simon. Maybe it was because the Sanctuary wasn’t THAT big or because Simon often sought you out. Either way, you had your fair share of encounters with him.

You fought all the time. Like, literally all the time. If you were in a room together, everyone would be sure to get a good view. Odd were, the two of you would start going at it at some point or another. The anger was always one sided. Simon never lost his patience with you, because he knew he was almost always the instigator of your fights. His amusement just made you angrier, and he fed off of it. 

It had gotten so bad that Negan refused to allow the two of you to do anything together if there wasn’t a third party involved. That didn’t stop Simon from going out of his way to hassle you.

You grimaced at the sound of whistling and heavy footsteps coming from down the hall. Oh, great. The man of the hour. You prepared yourself for his usual shenanigans, offering a very brief glance when he poked his head into the supply closet you were currently in.

“Mornin’, sweetheart.” He grinned proudly.

Did he really have to call you that? How aggravating.

“Hey, Simon.” You returned a rather unenthusiastic greeting.

His eyes were fixed on you as your attention remained on counting the unloaded boxes in front of you. Negan had put you on inventory duty for the day, meaning you’d be bopping around the Sanctuary’s supply closets counting resources from the run from the previous day. You could feel his gaze on you, the wheels in his head were evidently turning. He was probably figuring out a new way to get on your nerves.

“Do you need something?” You asked, tone full of irritation.

You still weren’t looking at him, trying to keep your cool. A smile was still smacked on his face, his expression not changing.

“Is it such a crime just to pop in and say hi to my favorite savior?” He asked, pretending to be offended.

You scoffed at that. His “favorite savior? Oh, please. What a charmer he thought he was.

“It is when I’m clearly busy.” You said, referring to the mounds of stuff you had yet to count.

“I’d hardly call counting boxes as busy.” He countered back.

You sighed heavily in annoyance. He just wanted attention. Your attention. That’s all he ever wanted was for you to acknowledge him whenever he was in your presence. Even if it could be rather annoying, you were the tiniest bit flattered. No one had ever gone after your validation as much as he did. You didn’t want him to feel like he had something to prove to you, because he didn’t. No one did. You just wished he’d pick a more pleasant approach.

“Well, I just do as I’m told and this is what I was told to do,” You smarted off, finally turning to look at him; “Do you have a problem with that?”

He took a step into the small closet. His smirk was gone, but his tone was just as playful as ever.

“Woah, darlin’. Why the bad attitude?” He asked, obviously knowing he was bugging you.

You tossed your head back in exasperation. It was evident that he wasn’t going anywhere anytime soon. You turned completely to face him, not realizing that he had been standing right behind you. You abruptly collided into him, your chest firm against him. You looked up into his eyes, your face growing hot. Had he always been that handsome? Your hard pause and stare told him everything he needed to know. You had a thing for him.

He knew it was mutual.

You cleared your throat awkwardly, but made no effort to back away from him. You meant for your words to come out as demanding, but instead they escaped as a desperate whisper.

“If you want to stick around, then make yourself useful and start counting.” 

He beamed at the invitation. You hadn’t actually ever offered your time to him. This was a step in the right direction in his eyes. Taking a leap of faith, his hands rested on your sides and gripped to keep you close.

“You sure that’s all you wanna do?” He asked lowly.

Before you knew it, and before you could say anything else, he kissed you. It wasn’t a gentle, experimental kiss. It was a deep, calculated, and passionate kiss that you could tell had been long awaited. The man that you thought you hated so much had you weak in the knees and barely processing any of the thoughts crossing your mind. Had you really been misinterpreting your feelings all along?

You pulled away first, heart suddenly caught in your throat as you felt yourself begin to panic. You unattached yourself from him and made a rash decision to get out before you had time to do anything else.

“I, uh...I’ve got to go.” You said at a more normal volume. 

You dashed out of the closet and back to the other side of the Sanctuary. You left him behind, feeling disappointed that his pledge for how he felt about you didn't go as he had hoped. For the first time, he felt afraid that maybe he had scared you off.

That was the last thing he wanted to do.

__

The days following the fateful make out session in the supply closet were tense and weird. You refused to look at him when you passed him in the hall and he didn’t speak to you for fear of freaking you out. Everyone around seemed to notice too. Suddenly, Simon wasn’t trying to get you riled up and you weren’t yelling at him to give it a rest. Your interactions were now stoic and silent. You were beginning to prefer the way it was before. At least then he was actually talking to you.

Oddly enough, the person who felt they were most affected was Negan. Negan despised silence, unless it meant everyone was listening to him. Even he would admit that the arguments the two of you had often gave him a headache, but he realized that he would rather down a couple aspirin after every meeting than have to stew in the tension that radiated off of the both of you now.

It took about an hour or so, but Negan was able to squeeze it out of Simon as to what exactly went down to where things had changed so drastically. Negan was pleased that Simon had gotten his act together and made a move, but he needed this to be resolved now. Because he just couldn’t take it anymore.

So that’s how you and Simon ended up in a room together. Alone. To most people, this was a disaster waiting to happen. Either he’d sweep you off your feet or you’d finally kill him. 

You sat at the table and he leaned against the wall, neither of you were brave enough to speak first. The silence was painfully loud, it was like a ringing in your ears. It was just a matter of who would crack under pressure first. It sure wasn’t going to be you. So he caved.

“Listen, [Y/N], about the other day...” He spoke gravelly; “I didn’t mean to cross any lines or freak you out.”

Your cheeks burned, your glance was committed to one area of the table. You weren’t looking at him yet. 

“I just don’t think we could go back to the way we were after that.” You admitted.

Simon shrugged, beginning to warm up to this conversation that needed to be had.

“Is that really what you want?” He questioned. 

“Yes.” You lied, but thought you were being truthful.

He felt gutted. Ouch. That was a blow to the chest. He could tell that you weren’t confident in your answer, though. He wouldn’t be satisfied until he was sure that you knew what you wanted. He took the seat next to you.

“So you’re telling me that the way you looked at me that day meant nothing? The way you kissed back just as much as I did wasn’t important?” He interrogated.

He had worked hard to build a connection before he made a move on you. He wanted to be absolutely sure that you didn’t want this. It would hurt him if you didn’t, but at least he would know it was honest. 

“Yeah. That’s exactly what I'm saying.” You said in an overly defensive growl.

You still hadn't looked at him, and he wasn’t convinced. There was something you weren’t saying.

“Look at me then. Look at me and tell me you don't want this,” He said more sternly than you’d ever heard him; “If you don't want me then say the word. I’ll walk away and never bring it up again.”

You looked at him immediately, ready to deny him once more, but couldn’t. The words didn’t come. Why was it so hard to say no to this? He bothered you something awful. He annoyed you and he drove you absolutely crazy to a point of madness. And you loved it. 

“I can’t say it,” You spoke gently; “I can’t say it, because...I know it wouldn’t be true.” 

And there it was. The real confession. He knew you hadn't admitted it to yourself. It was strange how we deny things to ourselves.

“It’s pretty obvious that we have something going. I’m crazy about you and I don’t want us to miss this chance,” He continued; “We don't have to jump right into it. I mean we could-”

In a shocking turn of events, you kissed him. Just as you had kissed a few short days ago. He smirked underneath your lips. Hook, line, and sinker. Turns out his inkling was right. And boy did he love it when he was right.

“I think we can jump right into it. We’re past the introduction stage.” You grinned.

He smiled back, throwing a wink before kissing you again.

“No complaints here.”

#simon #simon x reader #simon vibes #the walking dead simon #The Walking Dead #simon the walking dead #simon twd #simon twd x reader #simon twd fanfic #simon twd imagines #twd simon #twdbegins

[fragileizywriting]

man the PROBLEM with my impulse to write the "fun" demon lovin fic first before all of the in-between fics (they're all fun, but, i mean. there is, like, no plot in color coordinatin. at all. which means i can just literally do whatever) is that if i wanna talk about one of the in-betweens, i gotta mention the ~~~semantics~~~ which is like ugh because no one lives in my head

like omg i have all of this thought out and planned, you know?

and instead of subjecting one or two friends with my absolute train wreck of a thought process, i decided to subject all of you instead :) you're welcome <3

anyway. bear with me! all of these fics will get written i promise, i don't like leaving things unfinished and we will not mention the three abandoned fics i have on AO3 right now and there's like, a handful more fics in this au in store for us. two handfuls. lots of thousands of words left. we might be, like, a third way through from how many more words i probably have to write. a fourth. i am terrible at managing my projects.

and this project literally came out of nowhere.

like, omg, this entire (ENTIRE) au literally sprouted because of a typo error in the first chapter, and we only got to me writing the first chapter because i listened to 'maneater' by nelly furtado and thought of marinette dancing to the song. canonically that is the song she was dancing to in the first scene of demon lovin'. no one knows that bc i never told anyone. i didn't even put that in the author's notes. i should. i'm gonna go do that. and omg the song is so good.

did you know demon lovin' was actually going to be an adrinette fic? except in the first scene i accidentally wrote “Why do we keep pretending we don’t like her?” for adrien's dialogue instead of “Why do i keep pretending i don’t like her?” and i just kind of ran with it. i never told anyone that, either, i'm pretty sure!! congrats!!! authors notes. doesn't it pay to follow me? :D

and now it's like, four months later, and you can pry lukadrinette out of my cold and dead hands. ride or die.

anyway. sorry. rambling (ramblin')

i have a new fic idea for the au that i'm going to take absolutely six years to get to but i wanna share it so y'all keep me in check!!! i'm putting it all under a cut because it's long and i just wanted to word dump / brainstorm a fic idea

i want to write a fic somewhere in the middle of all of this, or even it goes after coordinatin', doesn't matter, where marinette gets a fever. just full-out delusional. at first she plays off the headache because, well, she's marinette. marinette doesn't get sick. she's never gotten sick. i'm going to have to come up with a "succubus only get sick and feverish from a particular illness" thing for this story, and i'll think about it when i actually write this out

she got sick. somehow. i'll figure it out somehow idk.

she manages to convince adrien and luka that she has to call nathaniel, because nath knows a doctor. adrien is pouty. he doesn't like nath. luka is reluctant. he also doesn't like nath.

but marinette is sick, and they know nothing about succubi health, so they agree.

marinette's fever gets so much worse.

by the time nathaniel shows up with marc (a character i haven't mentioned once in the fics yet so now i gotta fill you in about their role in the au, so give me a second) marinette's close to bursting to tears because she's in the middle of the next wave of fever, starting to slip into another round of gibberish and unrecognizable speech, and she goes on for twenty to thirty minutes to marc about how nathaniel is her prized possession and the jewel of her life and she's so upset that nathaniel had to move out of her cradle and into their's because she's not healthy enough to even be a cradler anymore, and she doesn't even have a cradle and she's unfit and terrible and no wonder nath moved out, because a cradler without a cradle is like a leg with no body

nathaniel is sweating. adrien has always looked at him with that blank, flat-out annoyed expression whenever he's near, but somehow luka looks no better.

everytime nathaniel tries to slip his hand out of marinette's grip, she grabs him tighter. nathaniel is sweating bullets. the two of them look like they're counting the minutes in order to kick nathaniel out of the house, which would be the easiest and least painful thing possible, because they look murderous. at some point he just acquiesces, knowing that if he's going to die, he might as well make marinette comfortable. he still really loves marinette, after all, and he doesn't like seeing her uncomfortable.

even as her two husbands(??? sure) look like they're gonna kill him. it's fine. it's fine. everything's fine.

marinette is so full of glee and happiness when she gets to lay her head down on his lap. nathaniel makes an effort to ignore the way that adrien is looking like a whole storm.

anyway, between all of this, nath's new cradler marc (they/them), is the doctor!!! of course. they immediately recognize her fever, already start prescribing her what to do. she doesn't listen to them, claiming that she knows how to take care of succubi when they're sick with a fever, but nath just rolls his eyes.

"she's trying to get out of taking medicine." because nath knows everything about marinette. they were cradle mates for almost their entire life. "she hates honey."

"what." says adrien. "what." says luka.

nathaniel looks at the two of them as if they're dumb. "she hates honey. she has never liked honey."

"do not make me eat honey," marinette says, somehow completely lucid, still petting nath's thighs. it is a good cushion. she's always felt better when nath's hands are in her hair. "do not. i will kick and scream. nasty nasty nasty. i know there's medicine in it."

luka and adrien are completely befuddled. marinette tastes like honey. she's always tasted like honey. how does she hate honey?

"honey will make the medicine go down easier," marc argues.

"i know there's medicine in it. there's no need for the honey."

i don't know where else to take this. i just want to write marinette struggling to get nathaniel to comfort her like he used to, luka and adrien not trusting him one bit, and nathaniel trying his hardest not to die.

oh, and a sick marinette that refuses to go on bed-rest. luka and adrien both find out that it is the equivalent of trying to herd sheep.

anyway hi good job making it to the end i love you

#demon lovin #speakizys #what even do i tag this as #whatever. no tag

[osita-iza]

Helloo! I like your writing a lot!! If you don’t mind can i request the rva + v, and saeran with mc who’s really sensitive? Like she cry when someone raise their voice, or when she feel someone becoming distant to them? Im sorry if my english is bad 😅 thank you!! I hope it’s not burdening you

Thank you so much anonie! Don’t worry, It wasn’t a burden at all!!! Sorry if it took longer than you wanted, I’m taking two summer classes right now, and they’ve been a lot of work these past couple weeks. As a Certified Sensitive Bitch, I found this request really interesting. I tried to make all of their stories different to keep it from being repetitive. 

I hope you enjoy it!! Requests are open <3

Possible spoilers: Jaehee’s Good/Normal Ending, some of Saeran/V/Seven’s routes. 

Warnings: Slight swearing, not much. 

RFA+V+Saeran: With a Sensitive MC (especially to yelling or distant) 

Yoosung 

He was stressed. He was just on edge. It doesn’t mean he doesn’t love you. This exam season will determine whether or not he’s accepted to vet school. It’s normal for him to be stressed. He’s just a little stressed… 

You made dinner that night, keeping your headphones in so your music didn’t disturb him. You had finished almost all of your finals last week, only having one this week, so you decided to help him out. 

You put his dinner in front of him as you sat down across the table. You were on your phone as you ate, and he would take a bite every once in a while. 

You tried to focus on your phone. You really really did. 

...But he had literal bags under his eyes; something you hadn’t seen on him in a long time. You made dinner half an hour ago, and Yoosung had taken about two bites from it. 

“Yoosung, have you eaten anything today?” 

“What?” He glanced up from his textbook for a moment, not even long enough for you to look into his eyes. “Oh, yeah! Uh… I ate a little bit after you left earlier.” 

“I left at 9 a.m. for class,” you said, “Yoosung, you need a break. You need to eat.” 

“MC-” 

“You’re gonna burn yourself out,” you insisted, “At this rate, you’ll collapse during your exam.” 

“Can you just leave me alone? God just because you don’t know what you’re doing with your life doesn’t mean you have to drag me down with you!” He yelled. 

You weren’t sure if you were more hurt or angry; your glare mixing in with your tears. “Oh, fuck you.” 

Yoosung finally looked up at you with wide eyes. You never cussed at him. Should he be more worried about that or your tears?

You sniffled and covered your mouth, already feeling your throat burn as you tried to hold back more tears. Your hands were shaking, just wanting to scream at him about how you just cared about him, how he went for a low blow, how you needed to know that he was alright. 

Yeah… he was more worried about the tears 

“Just because you’re stressed about your exams doesn’t mean you get to yell at me,” you said with a shaking voice. 

He didn’t know what to say, so you both just stared at each other for a moment. With a sigh, you grabbed your bag and walked to the door. 

Yoosung’s mind finally caught up with his body, and he ran up to you to grab your wrist. “Wait- I- I’m so sorry!” You stared at where your hands connected. Yoosung took this as a sign to continue. “You were right. I didn’t take a break all day, and I took it out on you. Will you take a break with me... Eat with me?” 

“...I can’t deal with being yelled at.” 

He pulled you into a hug by your hand. “Then I’ll never yell at you again.” 

You were still hurt, but you could feel his promise through his hug. “Wanna eat then?” 

“Of course,” he said as he pulled back to kiss you on the forehead, “Especially since you made it, so it’s made with extra love!” 

You smiled at him as you puckered your lips, and he kissed you. 

“So you forgive me?” 

“Mostly,” you said, “I think I need a couple more kisses to fully forgive you.” 

Jaehee 

Jaehee wasn’t the type to yell 

She was raised in a household that didn’t want her. A household where her aunt always yelled. 

While everything her aunt did hurt her, it was the yelling that taught her to shut up. 

So she learned to disagree calmly. Or not at all. 

You were the one who protected her. You stood up for her. To her you were the epitome of strength. 

You looked at Jumin, one of the richest men in the country, and told him that he was being entitled with how much pointless work you gave Jaehee 

You saw the woman who would work herself to the point of passing out, and you comforted her and showed her that she wasn’t alone 

So when a customer began berating you for mixing up his drink with another customer’s (which you already apologized for and fixed), she was angry but not worried per se 

You were the strongest person she knew

She would just give you a treat after he left, and you’d be fine

You could handle yourself. 

“I just don’t understand! You have one fucking job- to make coffee and give it to customers. How do you mess that up?” His voice gradually raised in volume with every word

The anger in her body was building up with every word he said. She was debating before she heard a sniffle, and Jaehee turned around to see tears shining in your eyes

You took a deep breath and spoke in a low volume. “Sir...” 

Oh hell no... 

Her heart broke, releasing that anger throughout her body. 

“Excuse me sir,” Jaehee said, standing next to you and putting her hands on the counter between you both and the customer

“What do you want?” he said 

“You have absolutely no reason to be yelling at the employees here-” 

“She-” 

Jaehee’s glare seemed to get darker as she spoke over him. “She has already gotten you your correct drink. Offered you a refund. And apologized for the mistake. And even if she didn’t, there is no reason to yell.” 

“This doesn’t concern you.” 

“As one of the owners of this establishment, this absolutely concerns me. I will not tolerate a customer blatantly insulting someone in this premises. I have to ask you to leave, and you will not be served here in the future.” 

He stared at the both of you for a moment before he threw the coffee cop on the ground and walked out of the cafe. 

You grabbed one of the napkins and wiped at your eyes. “I’m really sorry, Jaehee,” 

She pushed your hair out of your face and held your face in her hands. “You have nothing to be sorry for. It was a simple mistake, and you apologized,” 

“No… for crying,” you sniffled. “I know I should be able to handle it-” 

Jaehee shook her head. “No, you shouldn’t have to handle or deal with people yelling at you. And you won’t ever have to deal with it when I’m around, okay?” 

“O-okay.” 

Later that night, after the cafe was closed, she would have a better conversation with you. She wanted to know exactly what set you off, how she could help you calm down if it happened again, everything. 

And she promised you -with her words and a kiss- she would never yell at you. 

She knew you would protect her, but she would protect you too. 

Your sensitivity was the reason why you were able to see the pain she was in, even through a screen 

She would not let anyone use that sensitivity against you. 

Zen 

You were both really emotional 

It’s what made Zen a good actor. It’s what made you able to understand people around you. It’s why you two were a good match, able to handle each other’s waxing and waning of moodiness. 

But while your emotions made you cry, Zen’s emotions made him loud. 

I mean, he was in a biker gang. He had to learn to be loud 

He also had a bit of a jealousy problem. And he swore up and down that your coworker had been flirting with you at the company’s holiday party

He was pacing in the living room. Some of his hair was framing his face because he kept messing with his ponytail. You were sitting at the kitchen table, just tired as you watched him. 

“Are you really telling me that you don’t know he’s into you?” he said. Zen’s voice rose in volume with every word, not quite yelling it but getting to it. 

“Because he wasn’t, Zen. I wouldn’t let someone flirt with me, do you really think that low of me?” 

“That’s not it! You’re missing the point here!” He shouted. 

It was silent, save for his deep breaths. Zen was facing the wall, and he clenched his jaw. 

“... I’ll just go home,” you said, voice croaking. 

That made him turn around, and his eyes widened as he saw the tears shining in your eyes. 

His feet and emotions turned 180 degrees. 

“No, no, no, no,” he said as you stood up. He grabbed your wrists, trying to keep you from leaving. “Please, don’t leave. Let’s talk about this.” 

“What’s there to talk about? You’ve already made up your mind,” you said, “And I’m not gonna sit here to just get yelled at,” 

“I promise I won’t yell anymore. Please…” 

You glared at him as you wiped at your eyes. “If you yell at me one more time, I’m out.” 

“I promise I won’t.” 

You sat down and talked through it- calmly this time. After you worked through the original fight, he had to ask. “Was it the yelling that made you cry?” 

“I’ve always had a problem with yelling, even as a kid. Annoyed my parents to no end,” you said, already feeling the headache coming from the tears. 

“I’ll work on that then. I won’t be the reason you cry. Never,” he said, “And you don’t have to hide your emotions from me, okay?” 

You nodded, and tried to keep yourself from crying again because of how soft his eyes looked now. “Okay.” 

“Good. Because I want to take care of my princess.” Zen smiled and kissed you. 

The only reason he wanted you to cry was because of his amazing acting performance, never anything else. 

Jumin 

His father had a new fiance, and Jumin was in charge of the contract between C&R and her family’s company 

How his father didn’t see the obvious motive in that… but the company wasn’t horrible, so Jumin decided to keep his mouth shut 

That didn’t mean he was happy about it though… 

Without realizing it, he was falling back into old habits 

Jaehee was complaining more and more in the chatrooms about the workload, which Jumin was brushing off 

He was leaving for the office earlier and earlier in the mornings. Coming home later in the evenings. He started bringing work home too, something he never did before. 

You could probably count the hours that you guys were spending together on one hand. You knew he was busy with work and it was understandable that he would be distant

But… you needed Jumin. 

You moved out of your crappy apartment with a faucet that always leaked even though you called maintenance about it at least every month into a penthouse where you could have everything taken care of with the snap of a finger 

To say it was a lot would be the understatement of the fucking century 

The only constant you had- the only thing that felt that home- was Jumin 

Maybe you should do something? To make him feel loved? 

So you told his personal chef to take the day off, you were cooking tonight 

You went to the nearest grocery store, trying to not feel like everyone was staring at you when the bodyguards followed you in. 

This grocery store was a lot more boujee than the one you went to as a kid (or an adult for that matter). One of the bodyguards could see you were just wandering down the aisles, so he took pity on you and led you to where the ingredients were. 

You thanked him profusely before you began cooking in the kitchen, which also took you a bit longer to get a hang of. 

Apparently rich people have different stoves… good to know 

Finally you finished cooking dinner, right when Jumin got home. You assumed he would be home later than he said he would… and you were right 

“Hi Jumin!” you said as he shut the door 

“Hi, love,” he sighed as he kept walking, making a beeline for his home office 

You followed him a couple of steps. “I made dinner! It was one of my favorites as a kid. I was wondering if you wanted to try it-” 

“I’m really sorry. I have a lot of work to finish up tonight. I’ll be sure to try some tomorrow.” He turned around to kiss your forehead before walking into his office, shutting the door behind him. Not even sparing you a glance. 

Your throat began burning as tears began shining in your eyes. Without a word, you walked to the living room and sat down on the couch. You covered your mouth as the tears fell. 

Of course Jumin doesn’t want to spend time with you. You can’t even keep yourself from crying because you’re not getting attention. He didn’t even do anything! He didn’t yell. Didn’t snap at you. His emotions are always in check; he’s always rational. 

Meow

Elizabeth jumped onto your lap, and you held her close to your chest as you wheezed for air. She kept meowing as she cuddled into your chest. “At least you want me around, Elizabeth,” you whispered. 

“Why is Elizabeth meowing so much? It’s distracting” Jumin asked as he walked into the living room. His eyes widening a fraction of an inch when he saw your teary face

You looked Elizabeth in the eye. “Snitch.” 

He frowned, sitting next to you. “Darling, what’s wrong?” 

“Nothing, I’m just being overly emotional.” You said, pulling Elizabeth back into your chest. “It doesn’t matter.” 

Jumin frowned and put his hand on your leg, squeezing it lightly. “You were able to empathize with my emotions. Ones that I didn’t even know I had, let alone articulate. Your strength is your emotions; a strength I can never replicate. Don’t dismiss your emotions, please. Especially not with me,” 

Well now you were going to cry again. 

You leaned closer, and he wrapped his arms around you. He rubbed your back as you let out the last of your tears, leaving an imprint of your wet cheeks on his button up 

When you could finally breathe normally, you spoke up. “I went to the grocery store today- to buy things for dinner. And I was lost, but I didn’t want to ask a manager because the bodyguards were right there. And so Mr. Park ended up showing me where to go. And I come home, and it takes me half an hour to just figure out how to work the stove because there are so many knobs that do nothing, and god damn they don’t even say what temperature you’re heating up to clearly! And then I taste the food, and it tastes nothing like how it did as a kid because the ingredients aren’t the generic brand.” 

“May I ask where this is going?” Jumin furrowed his eyebrows. 

“I changed everything about my life to the point where making my favorite meal isn’t normal for me anymore,” you said, and he frowned. “Don’t get me wrong. I know that’s part of the Jumin Han package, but it’s only worth it if I’m getting Jumin Han too” 

“What do you mean?” 

“We’ve had dinner together twice this month,” you answered, “I wasn’t raised to handle this. I can only handle this if I have you. I can’t do it otherwise,” 

Jumin frowned. He kissed you slowly, making sure to savor the feeling of your lips against his. When was the last time he kissed you like this? He couldn’t remember. 

“I’m sorry, love.” 

“I know you’re busy-” 

“Still. I can’t imagine my life without you. I should be treating you as such. And I promise I will be doing better from now on.” 

You spend the night eating dinner and relaxing in the living room. 

After that night, Jumin makes sure that you both get to eat dinner at least twice a week. Nights where you both just focus on each other, and there’s no work. 

(Sidenote: Jumin’s new work-life balance trickles down to Jaehee, and she swears she would give you her first born if you ask for it because of this) 

Saeran

Being an ex-cult member came with a lot of challenges 

He had made a lot of progress. The anger and aggression he had mostly subdued as he got help, and he was proud of himself (first time he had ever felt that). He even had a job now; something he had never even dreamed of. 

But today he had like three customers scream at him. One of them even doing it in front of his manager, meaning he got an extra lecture. 

Saeran decided to walk home from work instead of taking the bus, seeing it as a way to burn off some steam and avoiding a confrontation with a stranger. 

He groaned as he got home and took his shoes off before he heard the TV show pause. 

Shit. 

He forgot today was your day off. 

He went to rush into your bedroom, avoiding the living room you were sitting in, but you followed him in with a smile, wanting to talk to your boyfriend. “Hi Saeran. How was work?” 

Saeran clenched his jaw. His immediate reaction to scream. Instead he clenched his fists. He couldn’t yell at you. He couldn’t lose his temper with you. He couldn’t. 

“Rough day.” 

He sat on the bed, and you frowned from the other side of the bed. 

“Do you wanna talk about it?” you asked, voice soft. 

He rested his elbows on his knees, dropping his face into his hands. His hands were shaking already. “I think I need to be alone right now.” 

“Okay… if you change your mind I’ll be in the liv-” 

“For the love of god, would you shut up?” he yelled, not even sure where it came from himself, “I already told you to leave me alone, so could you fucking listen for once in your life?” 

It was silent, save for your deep breathing. You turned around, shutting the door behind you. 

He felt nauseous. 

You were incredibly patient with him, almost more patient than Saeyoung. You didn’t ask for a lot. You just told him that you couldn’t handle yelling, never had, and you probably never will. It always made you scared. 

You didn’t outright tell him not to yell at you, but he figured out that’s what you meant when you said it quietly to him one night. 

And he promised himself he would never do that to you. Saeran put you through enough already; he couldn’t scare you now. 

Saeran took a shaky breath. His body both tense and loose at the same time. He couldn’t relax, but he also wasn’t in control of his body. 

He sat on the bed for who knows how long before he stood up, ready to apologize. 

The TV was still paused in the same time as before, and you weren’t in the living room. 

His heart began racing. 

What if you left? Were you safe? Did you leave him? Did he ruin this in the matter of minutes? 

Saeran’s hands gripped onto the cushions of the couch as anxiety took over his body. 

Then he heard a sniffle and a gasp coming from the bathroom. It was clear what you were doing. He felt both worse and better. 

Saeran knocked on the bathroom door, and the whispering noises somehow got quieter. “Can I come in?” 

Your voice croaked. “It’s open.” 

His heart tightened as he opened the door. Your eyes were puffy and red. Tears still attached to your eyelashes. “...Hi” you muttered, refusing to look at him, instead focused on the towel in your lap. You must have used that to muffle yourself. 

“I- I’m sorry. I was trying to keep myself from yelling, but I lost control when I shouldn’t have. I know I shouldn’t have. I’m so sorry…” 

You nodded, still refusing to look at him. He wanted to hug you. Pull you in, rub your back, stroke your hair and promise you that it would never happen again. But he had promised himself that it would never happen in the first place before. 

You were always the one comforting him. This was the first time he had done it for you, made even worse that he was the reason you needed to be comforted. 

You let out a whimper and wiped away your oncoming tears. “Yelling just scares me and hearing it from you-” 

Saeran stepped towards you, grabbing your shoulder and pulling you against his torso. You could feel how tense he was; you were practically leaning against a wooden plank. He was really trying. 

“I… I promise I’ll try better next time. I don’t like you being scared of me or seeing you like this and knowing it was me. It won’t happen again,” 

You looked up at him, and he patted your head on instinct. You furrowed your eyebrows, too confused to really be scared anymore. 

If anything was gonna make Saeran seem less scary, it was gonna be his concerned eyes as he struggled to comfort you. “You’re trying right now, huh?” 

“I am. And I promise I’ll try harder.” 

“Can I have a kiss?” 

He leaned down and kissed you. “Do you want to go watch TV? So I can make it up to you.” 

You nodded and as you cuddled into his side, holding onto his hand tightly, Saeran pulled out his phone. 

He wrote out an email to his therapist: 

Can we move up my appointment? 

He was gonna try better. He wouldn’t do this again. 

V

January 26th… The week of their anniversary

Or at least it would’ve been

Don’t get it twisted. He loved you. More than he had ever loved anyone else before. He would never trade his experiences with you for her. 

But it was the week of their anniversary. 

That Sunday was supposed to be their wedding date. 

Monday was explainable. 

People just want their alone time sometimes 

So was Tuesday… 

And Wednesday… sort of 

But four days of your boyfriend that you lived with not talking to you?

That was not alright 

You made more of an effort Friday, hoping that if you pushed him for a conversation, he would speak up about whatever was bothering him 

You both had been home for about five hours now. You had tried starting a conversation about ten different times. 

You couldn’t anymore. 

If you talked again, your voice would probably crack. So you went into the bathroom, cried it out, and went to bed early. 

Both you and V were praying for this week to end. 

Sunday was their anniversary, and V told himself that everything would be normal afterwards. 

But Saturday was your breaking point 

When V left for rehearsal, you got your phone, dialed Seven’s number, and sat down on your bed. 

“Hey ho! What’s up, MC?” 

Does Seven even know?... “Has V told you anything this week?” 

“What?” Seven asked, and you could hear him shuffling around on the other end. “Is something wrong?” 

Shit you were already crying. You wiped at your nose and sniffled to clear it. “N-Nothing. He’s just been really quiet this past week, so I was worried.” 

“Quiet?” 

“Yeah, he hasn’t really talked to me at all really,” you confessed. Hating that your tears were running down your face. Holding in your emotions was like trying to stop a tsunami with a spoon. Your voice cracked, and you hoped that Seven was dumb enough -just this once- to just let it slide. “I was just wondering if he talked to you about anything that I should be worried about.” 

“MC, are you crying?” he asked. 

“Is that a yes or no, Seven?” 

“MC-” 

“Seven!” you snapped back before covering your mouth to keep any sounds from escaping. “I’m sorry for yelling. But has he?” 

“No…” 

“Okay, thanks for talking to me though. I hope you have a nice day.” You heard him try to say your name, but you hung up before he could finish. He called a couple more times, but you ignored it. 

You cleaned yourself up and went to work 

Your chest was heavy when you got home, and V cleared his throat as you took off your shoes 

“Hi,” you said, “Have you picked what to have for dinner?” 

He stared at you for a moment with furrowed eyebrows. “Uh… I was stuck between the Chinese place and pizza place.” 

“I’m good with either.” 

It was silent for a few moments as you went through the mail, avoiding looking at him. “I talked with Luciel today.” 

There it was… 

“Can we talk?” 

You nodded and sat down at the table. 

You spoke up before he could. “Why have you been distant this week?” 

“My anniversary and expectant wedding date with Rika is Sunday,” V explained, “I was reminded of her, and my first instinct was to distance myself again.” 

You wanted to be mad at him, but you understood it. “Are you okay?” 

“I’m… getting better. I wouldn’t say I’m good, but better than the beginning of this week,” V said 

You took a deep breath, hating the burning in your throat as tears appeared in your eyes. “You could’ve just said that, and I wouldn’t have pushed you to talk more about it,” you breathed out and wiped at your face, “I thought…” 

He furrowed his eyebrows and grabbed your hand. “You thought what?” 

“Sometimes I worry that you’re only with me because I was conveniently there when you were going through everything,” you confessed. And he felt his chest tighten. “So when you did pull away from me, even though it was just for a moment… I was scared.... I was scared that you realized that too,” 

He leaned over and kissed you, tasting the salt from your tears. “I promise, I love with all my heart. I appreciate that you were there for me, and I cared about you then. But I’ve fallen in love with you a little bit every day, over and over and over again since then,” 

You smiled at him as crying took over again, and you wrapped your arms around his neck. He held you as tears wet his shirt, rubbing your back as you did. “I love you,” you said into his neck, the words garbled. 

“I love you too,” V whispered. “And I’ll remind you of that everyday if I need to.”

Saeyoung

Saeran was hurting right now. Saeyoung knew that. He was just scared. It was scary to be in the mental health ward. To be away from Mint Eye, all he knew for years. 

But when Saeran yelled at him… That he abandoned his brother. He hurt everyone around him. That Saeran was better dead than with his brother. 

That Saeyoung didn’t deserve love. The only thing he was good at was corrupting people. 

… It was hard to not let it sink in. 

Because Saeran was just saying everything Saeyoung had told himself before. 

So Saeyoung was silent as he drove home. You and Vanderwood were working today, so he was silent as he cooked dinner. 

And he was silent when you came home. Only saying hi and that dinner was done before grabbing his plate and eating at his desk. 

There was a pit in your stomach as you followed him. “Is something wrong?” 

“No.” 

“Then why are you avoiding me?” you asked. 

“God. Why are you even still here?” he snapped, turning to look at you. His eyes weren’t even angry just… empty. “You had your party. Mint Eye is gone. The agency isn’t after me… so why are you still here?”

And then he turned around to face his screen again. 

That pit in your stomach had traveled all across your body. And god was it heavy. 

Your throat burned. 

The walls were closing in on you. 

And there was Seven. Just sitting at his desk typing. 

You wrapped your arms around you. Making yourself smaller, as if that would save you from the suffocation. 

You were just frozen. Slowly you stepped out of your shared room and walked to the front door. 

Silent, just like he was, you stepped outside. 

As if the fresh air was caffeine, your body woke up, letting the tears run down your face. 

You stumbled into the lawn outside and sat down, letting the damp grass cool your burning skin. You covered your mouth as you sobbed. 

Over and over again. Sobs and whimpers, muffled by your hand, would rack your body. You would finally calm down and take a deep breath. And the coldness would burn your throat and set you off again. 

A headache echoed in your head as you laid on the grass, staring up at the stars. Finally too exhausted to keep up the crying. They reminded you of Saeyoung. 

Fuck him for ruining stars for you. 

“What the hell are you doing, kid?” Vanderwood asked as he crouched next to your laying body. 

“Looking at the stars.” Your voice was raspy, barely there after your meltdown. 

“Are you okay?” they asked as they sat down next to you. “It’s late, ya know? It’s not safe out here.” 

“I’m not going inside.” 

“Hey-” 

“Thanks for your concern.” 

With a huff, they stood up, and you heard the security questions before the door opened. It shut. Crickets. 

The door opened again. And someone sat next to you with a sigh. You’d recognize that cologne anywhere. You pulled your knees up to your chest and wrapped your arms around them, refusing to look at him. 

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said those things.” 

“It’s not even what you said. It’s how you said it,” you responded, still avoiding his gaze. “It was like we were back in that fucking apartment.” 

“What?” 

“I was back in that fucking apartment. There was a bomb, a kidnapper, and you refused to even look at me. Everything was out of control. I felt like the exact same bomb was in the bunker back there. It was just happening around me- to me. All I could do was just wait. Just sit there waiting!” 

Unlike before, where he didn’t want to say, now he couldn’t speak. What was he going to say? Was there something he could say?

You were so calm the entire time you were at the apartment. Crying only after Saeran broke in. At least the only time he saw. How many times did you cry when he wasn’t looking? He thought he was the only one freaking out because you seemed to only be focused on him. 

But you couldn’t control the bomb. Couldn’t stop Saeran. Stop Rika. Couldn’t even tell the RFA the truth. 

But you wanted to help him. That was the only thing you could do. 

Seven didn’t see the panic attacks in the shower. Or you crying into your pillow. 

“I can’t do this again Seven. I can handle all of it. But not this. I can’t just sit here and watch you do this all over again. Over and over and over again! I can’t-” You sobbed, and Seven pulled you into his chest. 

He shut his eyes to keep his own tears from falling. Your back rose up and down as you gasped for air, his shirt becoming wet. 

Seven rubbed your back slowly and kissed the top of your head. You pulled away; your eyes finally dry. “I won’t push you away again. I promise I won’t cut you out.” 

“Saeyoung…” you mumbled. 

“No. I mean it,” he said. “I’ll do whatever it takes. I won’t shut you out again. I won’t make you go through that again.” 

He looked you in the eye with a smile that disappeared for a moment. “I promise, okay?” 

“Okay.” 

“Do you want to stay out here or go inside?” 

“I want to stay out here a little longer.” 

“That’s fine.” He held your hand as you laid out on the grass again

#mystic messenger headcanons #mystic messenger headcanon #mysme headcanons #mysme headcanon #mystic messenger #mystic messenger fanfic #rfa+v+saeran #requested #anon