#erola.txt

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You know when people are like omg I'm so embarrassed I'm not talking to this person ever again I embarrassed myself so much lalala and it turns out they said like 'you too' to the cashier at the wrong time or whatever I swear I do much worse than this like every other day to people I actually see often and I've had to stop overthinking around it because otherwise i could never interact with another human being again ever

#i think I'm nice by remembering stuff about people and bringing it up with them but i always follow from my own thoughts #and not any conversational cues or context and people obvs can't read my mind so they must be like wtf is she even on about #it's really so bad i know I'm chronically embarrassed for life #erola.txt

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please excuse my post kindly go ahead

#silently screaming how do people get partners howwwwwHOWwhehwwwww #every person i meet has a partner even on the internet i am so baffled dazed and confused #to me it seems as if the stars should align once in a million years for me to even meet someone I'd be compatible with #pls i know it's not happening rn because I've stopped trying but during the time i was trying it was awful and ridiculous and exhausting #so wtf #unless someone in my office suddenly decides to confess his love to me I'll be just here bye #erola.txt

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I haven't been here in so long sorry guys the most interesting thing that's happened is me finally getting a diffuser, my hair is gonna look so bouncy tomorrow

#I'm receiving like 4 parcels this week when i usually never order anything at all it's crazy times for me wooo #erola.txt

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awful AWFUL times I've had possibly one of the weirdest worst weeks of my life and I'm questioning everything all over again and Now i go and learn that monsieur taeyong is enlisting like wow there's no end to the pain truly 😔

#wish him the best i may have no clue what his life is like anymore but once you've decicated a blog to a band there's no going back ig #i honestly only come back to tumblr in my lowest times it looks like I'm always going through hell which is it wrong maybe not #but also it's an inaccurate depiction of my life in any case I'm NOT having a good time and yes it's because of work #erola.txt #is it too late to start a new life at 27 i had my bday this past month 😔

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So I'm currently in Japan for a short holiday + then work (but pls don't mention it) trip and my toxic trait is I will 100% try to talk to the people in Japanese because why would I low miserable tourist have to force anyone to speak English, and then they'll reply in Japanese and 9.7 times out of 10 I will not understand a word because I, in fact, do not speak japanese

#i spent so much time looking for a plug adaptor in a store you have no idea #i asked 4 different people this is not a joke me and my social anxiety #i do understand sometimes some words and stuff like my basic skills are pulling through let's goo #erola.txt

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#two girls from work have texted me asking if I'm okay in a very random way and when i text them back they give me no explanation #and yea it's true i missed an afterwork dinner thing last night but i thought it wasn't a big deal #because it's not like it was organised for me plus everyone's very busy at this time #so I'm thinking is this really what it's like to have people care about you #or am i dying or did i get hacked and started unknowingly sending weird emails what's going onnn?? #shjfigklhskf #erola.txt #the hacked thing actually seems plausible IT is ignoring me #anyways they've never done this before this is not usual what is this

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okay wtf in the past two days I've gotten approached on the street by not one but two random men and I wasn't even standing anywhere like literally walking FAST not looking at anyone I'm sorry what

#this last guy came RUNNING and i had to awkwardly laugh and leave #I'm off the apps but this is not what i meant by wanting to meet people organically 😭😭😭😭 #I'm a woman in london it's scary and I've suffered attempted mugging before #I'm not gonna give you my number I'm not insane #erola.txt

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my manager (yes you read that right) recommended me to watch love is blind Japan for 'research purposes' and I'm in the first episode and some LOSER 40+ YEAR OLD MAN goes like I like women in the kitchen that's their natural habitat and literally goes and asks first thing whether the girl likes cooking aaaaaaa I wanted to yell at my screen and tell her to run wtff

#they all sound like red flags to me honestly it's making me irrationally angry #erola.txt #lmao it's chinchilla girl's bday today hbd girl hope you ended up not traumatised ✌️

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Had to call an ambulance for one of my co-workers today, I'm still a bit shaken tbh

#nothing too alarming she was just feeling very dizzy and nauseous and not improving #but i was alone with her for a long while not really knowing what to do and jesus was that stressful #she's so sweet as well i feel really bad for her and she texted me of all people to come and help her i just :((((((((( #thankfully someone got in the ambulance with her #she's this sweet middle-aged korean woman who doesn't have a partner or anything so i just hope she's ok now #I'm gonna buy her a gift tomorrow or something i feel very useless #erola.txt #(it's relevant that she's korean because we're in the uk and english is not her first language and some people were a bit weird tbh)

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Living in London without a rich boyfriend is completely unsustainable and I'm honestly about to run deep into the woods and live off of acorns

#love a surprise bill weekend #a HUGE surprise bill #right after we got told that our rent is increasing by a TON haha peace and love #i just love it when my friends/co-workers complain about the fact that 'if i didn't have my boyfriend it'd be impossible' like HI THIS IS ME #??£(_+shd+ #obviously they have no ill intention but like yea we struggle over here both emotionally and financially #erola.txt

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I wanna go watch all of us strangers at the cinema but I've heard people say it's really really sad and I don't want to start sobbing all by myself in a room full of strangers i have issues with vulnerability

#:-( #erola.txt #i went to see the holdovers with my dad and cried during that so i know i would not be able to hold it in

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sometimes I think I'm a fully grown adult with adult interests and concerns but tonight I was the only one in the friend group at the pub to explain the Paul mescal running rumours

#false alarm friends I'm still the most chronically online person I know irl hdkekd what an honour what a medal to wear #that rumour is hilarious though #and my friends live in north london too so #erola.txt

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I convinced myself it was okay to go to a bookshop today because I had a gift card that would save me like half the price of a book. I get to the bookshop. I pick the book. I go up to the bookseller, say I actually have this gift card. Bookseller goes oh sorry the computer's down today so it doesn't work. I proceed to smile, say it's okay and buy the book anyways full price :)))

#like what was I supposed to do 😭😭 say oh okay then nevermind I'm not buying anything #😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 #i didn't want to spend this much money i swear it's been so bad lately #i was depressed in the winter but at least i saved more by not having anything to do or anywhere to go shfkekf #erola.txt

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I have been so anxious in life and always expecting the worst that now I'm literally the most zen person in the world. The queen of chill. Bad news happen but oh what's that it's me being chill about it. Yea it might be awful for me but I'm gonna be so calm about it it's like it doesn't affect me anymore it's just another Wednesday in my life

#anyways ask me again on a different day in my cycle and I will say i want to jump out of a window #but a lot of the time i just don't have the energy anymore to be anxious or embarrassed about things that happened to me oh well yea #don't know what this kind of response says about me i don't think it's very normal but what's normal anymore #erola.txt

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Actually bonded with an office girlie from a different department at the queue to the loo yesterday during our office Christmas party and it's now too late to ask for her name help

#I've talked to her before and she's told me before i just can't remember for the life of me #i even went to our online office people directory to try and locate her but i can't find her rjfkfl #i fully support not uploading your personal pic like we were passive aggressively emailed about 3 times i really do #but now idk who you are #also had 2 people compliment my jumper but i never seem to be able to talk to people like a normal person and I'm beating myself up about i #so I'll be doing that in the meantime cheers ✌️ #erola.txt

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Absolutely no one cares but I just got charged £3.80 to print one (1) single sheet of black & white paper at rymans I am in SHOCK i feel robbed I feel scammed I couldn't believe my eyes like how can you say that to people with a straight face yes i did pay for it 😭😭😭😭

#I could've printed this for free in the office if it wasn't the weekend and i need it for tomorrow 🥲 #i even started wondering if the guy had detected my foreignness and was purposefully scamming me #but i think he said the same thing to the guy after me I'm livid #erola.txt