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erncst-a · 2 years

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ANSWERED, @hatesghosts “Why are you — saying all these things —”

The thing was, he could see it all with her- the cozy home, a dog, a family. The late, lazy Sunday evenings snuggled under blankets eating ice cream. The way he’d find ways to enjoy the parties he always dreaded, because he’d know she was just around the corner, and it made her happy to be there. How the hard times wouldn’t be so hard; even when he didn’t know how to communicate, because she’d just hold him- that much, they’d already experienced. Jess knew she was it for him, but there it ticked in the back of his mind, closing up the back of his throat.

Every safety he’d ever felt, Jess recoiled from, or struck it with his venom. Why would this be any different? Jess was impulsive. Most of the time, his impulses were lead by emotions that came on quick and harsh, and that’s what had led him to moving across the country. It’s what made him foolish enough to think that his dad was going to finally step up and take him in, now that he was old enough to be less of a burden. It’s why he was stuck living in his car, and it’s what finally made him realize that he was simply no good. This was always how it was going to be for him; a short fuse, a closed off hermit. Life had not been gentle with him, and he didn’t see that changing anytime soon. He couldn’t see himself changing anytime soon. Everything everyone had always said about him was true.

Jess had made a mistake- he knew it was a mistake, but he couldn’t dare go crawling back now. Not when he’d painted a picture in his head of how everything she loved about him would one day be the things she would hate. The way he always had a smart comment, or how he didn’t like going to parties, or meeting new people. How quick he was to defend others, even if it meant taking a beating. Jess also knows that his mind likes to play tricks on him, lie to him, tell him that everyone leaves; he knows this, and still he can’t make himself stop seeing the lie. Try as he might, he can’t stop the words from leaving. He can’t stop himself from tearing everything apart.

The more she hated him, the better off she was. Truly. The sniffles he hears over the phone weren’t ones he was a stranger to, but he’d never known himself to be the cause. The tear he feels inside isn’t something that makes him stop for a moment to think straight; instead, it fuels his thoughts that all he’s going to bring her is pain and disappointment. Even if she’d not once expressed that; deep in his head, he just knew it was coming. It was better to get it over with, so she could move on with her life.

“Because you need to hear it.” The usual venom in his tone when he pulled the final string nowhere to be found. The steam he had was running out, and he knew he had to get off the phone before he caved. “I think I met someone,” And as the lie leaves his tongue he feels a white heat wrap around his throat. “- and we shouldn’t be wasting our last year of high school stuck on someone three-thousand miles away.” Maybe he could convince himself, too. “I’m sorry, it’s just not realistic.”

#hatesghosts #OW #v. tbn #au. euphoria #i. barbara brooks #Q

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seesree · 2 months

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Dark Feminine Energy(Jyestha Nakshatra) + Mercury Ruled Nakshatras

Alexa Demie, Jyestha Sun

Jyestha opposes the sweetly coated nakshatra of Rohini, which is a nakshatra of abundance & joy and being internally satisfied thus outwardly not doing much. But in Jyestha, it’s where you are internally unsatisfied thus outwardly you do everything to achieve satisfaction thus making you outwardly abundant and full of richness. They get more inward satisfaction after outer satisfaction. This nakshatra is connected to Alakshmi, Lakshmi’s jealous, hungry sister.

Naomi Campbell, Jyestha Moon

Alakshmi means ‘Not Lakshmi’, so Alakshmi is everything opposite of Lakshmi. Lakshmi loves sugar and sweets while Alakshmi loves spice. Alakshmi is literally everything you neeed to know on why Jyestha’s have such a dark feminine power. They are not trying to satisfy a male force but more trying to satisfy themselves. This nakshatra has a similar energy to Chitra but Chitra’s are nurturing when it comes to male energy just like Maddy Perez(Jyestha Sun, Chitra Moon) . Alexa Demie’s Chitra Moon made her character in euphoria more sympathetic to the toxicity of Nate.

Jyestha Moon, Shomi Kaiser & Jyestha Sun Alexa Demie

People spotting Jyestha energy. It mostly has to do with energy not the physical

Jennie Kim, Jyestha ASC

Jennie’s birth time is unreliable but for now i will use her for Jyestha and maybe the frequent comparison between her and Alexa Demie could be because of Jyestha

Tyra Banks, Jyestha Sun & Megan Ewing, Jyestha Moon

This Nakshatra’s dark feminine energy tends to extend towards it’s trine nakshatras too( Ashlesha and Revati)

Kim Kardashian, Jyestha ASC

A Side Note: Ashlesha is the stage where a woman awakens to her sexuality and master it

Megan Fox, Ashlesha Moon & Angelina Jolie, Revati Moon

You’ll notice Mercury ruled nakshatras have alot of sexual energy and give a sexual or terrifying vibe

Barbara Mori, Revati ASC & Adriana Lima, Jyestha ASC

This image is so Jyestha CODED(Chitra as well)

#Jyestha #Jyestha Nakshatra #vedic astrology #astrology observation #nakshatras #mercury #Scorpio

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frownyalfred · 24 days

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(In no way meant to be pressurizing) but I cannot stop thinking about the world of Borderline and the repercussions for the batfamily. They must be inundated with new facts about themselves (on the tuna sandwich level of nicknames they revile or secretly adore) and the breakdown of past beliefs about each other when accidental memories or anger lashes out (irrationally) but it must still be shocking to cope with, and try to force yourself to be rational, both of you stung by the thoughts alone. Also considering that these guys are so busy and independent it must be a shock to their systems to be close and then be unable to escape one another. I don't know, you've created such a compelling narrative that I'm waiting for the fanfiction of the fanfiction.

The possibilities are so chilling but so intriguing, right? borderline takes up like 20% of my writing thoughts on a good day. The idea of someone knowing you just as well as you know yourself makes me physically shiver, but there's also something so reassuring about it. You can depend on them for anything -- and eventually that turns into outright dependence. You become so intertwined and linked that beliefs, memories, and even present emotions aren't wholly yours or theirs.

What compels me about their bond specifically is that they can't break it, despite their best efforts. And as time goes on, they don't want to. Or, at least, that strange kind of protectiveness/possessiveness starts to overtake the urge to be discrete. Despite the obvious drawbacks, such as a lack of intimacy, of true privacy, of personhood. It's an inevitable meshing of people and minds, and it's hard to tell where it will stop.

You will eventually crave what hurts you and takes away from you. And by the time you notice how much the bond has taken away from you, it's too late. Because you won't care anymore. It's a self sustaining cycle of horror and resignation.

It's freaky, and I don't mean to get too ominous about future sequels because I don't think it'll all be doom and gloom. The moments of euphoria they have in borderline are so high, right? So beautiful. They work better than they ever have. They've crossed years of trauma and resignation in a single week. Gotham is at their fingertips, instead of hanging in the periphery.

But how do you decide when things have gone too far? How do you stave off what feels inevitable? How does Jason pull Dick back from the edge of talonization without knowing him better than Barbara? How does Alfred stand on the periphery and watch Bruce absorb into his children and vice versa? Do the opinions of others even matter, when they always have their web?

#sorry for the rambling #just some guiding questions for me to come back to #if anyone would like to write fics off of borderline please lmk!!#I want to read them haha #borderline #myfic #theresurrectionist #batfamily #bruce wayne #dc #dc comics

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soccer-love · 1 year

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It's the anon that ask do you write for sarah zadrasil here is my idea reader and sarah are together and both austrian but maybe reade plays for another team and the only time they see each other is austrian camp and the last game for international break reader team play bayern and bayern won and sarah wounds up at Austria camp maybe reader plays for Frankfurt. There's my idea.

“How could I ever be mad at you?”

Sarah Zadrazil x reader

"You're good, buddy?" Laura asks, sitting down next to me in the locker rom.

"Yeah, I just really don't want to play against them." I say and she nods, my phone vibrates and I open the new message.

"I love you." Laura reads out loud "Does she say that, because she thinks she's going to win and but that you shouldn't take it personally or because she knows we are going to win and says that to let you know that she loves you anyway."

"No idea." I say and she wraps an arm around me.

"I know how you feel, Sarah is my best friend and I don't want to play against her." she says.

It's the last game of the champions league qualification round, Eintracht Frankfurt against Bayern Munich.

Laura and I both play for the Austrian women's national team too, together with my girlfriend and Bayern player Sarah Zadrazil.

"But we are doing this, okay?" She gives me a encouraging smile and I take a deep breath.

"Your right, thank you."

"That's what I'm here for, guardian of the cutes couple that exists." she says, standing up, her hands on her waist, making her look like some superhero.

Laura Freigang on the other side of the room, throws a protein bar at her.

"You should better get chanced guardian of the midfield." Sara says, while I put on my warum-up shirt

As we walk out on the field and shake hands with the other teams, Sarah gives me a extra big smile "Good game, babe." she says and I can't help but return her smile, gosh she's just so beautiful when she smiles.

"Man you two are so in love with each other, that makes me feel even more single." Laura behind me whispers and I roll my eyes.

Before Sarah and I got together, something about two years and three moths ago, we all were friends but since then, its kind of Laura's favorite thing to be the third wheel in our relationship.

"Then go get yourself someone." I whisper back, as we make a circle with the team.

Tanja as our Capitan holds one of her inspirational speeches, before we scream our usual "SGE ey." and then walk to our places on the pitch.

The first half both teams are clearly struggling to get near each others Goals, I shoot a pass at Barbara and she tricks the Bayern defenders to get past them, but unfortunately Laura Benkarth is a good goal keeper and prevents the goal.

In the 68 minute, Carlotta shoots the ball towards the half way line and I sprint towards the spot but slow down before I reach it to have more control over it .

The only thing that I don't see is that Lina Magull is also running towards the ball and she is so close behind me that when I sow down she accidentally crashes into me.

One of her feet, goes between mine and I fall down with her.

The referee blows the whistle and walks over to us, she's about to pull out a card for me but Lina holds up her hand.

"Wait, its not her fault, she didn't noticed me. And incase you give her a card, you have to give me one two because its my fault that she's laying here." Lina explains.

The referee gives us a confused look but nods and lets her hand down. I notice some of the Bayern players holding back their laughter.

"Thanks." I say to Lina as we both get up.

"Just being fair." she answers before getting ready to shoot her free kick.

After five more minutes Tanja gets passed the Bayern defenders and I shoot her a long ball, this time she gets the ball just right and scores.

But sadly it doesn't lasts long, in the 80 minute, Lea Schüller scores a goal and I can see the euphoria of the team slowly fading while the Bayern players get more and more confident.

We get four minutes of extra time and just about thirty seconds before the final whistle it's Maxi Rall that scores the second goal.

After it ends, the Bayern players, are jumping on each other, celebrating that they're going to play in the champions league, we try to cope with the fact that we're not going to be in it.

I sit down on the grass and someone passes me a water bottle, but I just bury my face in my hands.

"Hey." from the corner of my eyes, I see the color of the Bayern socks and think it's Sarah but it's not her voice.

"Hi." I say, Lina points at a spot next to me.

"Can I sit there?" she asks, giving me a half smile.

"It's your pitch, so yes."

"Nah it belongs to the Bayern Munich company, I just work for them." she says while sitting down next to me.

"It was nice from you, to tell the referee that it's not my fault."

"Just playing a fair game." she looks at my side profile and then at the big screen where the final score is written on.

"I'm sorry that you guys are out of the competition." she explains, before wrapping an arm around me.

"Thank you."

After a couple of minutes the team gets together again and I say goodbye to Lina, we have a chat with our trainer and he says that it's okay that we're out and we shouldn't feel to bad about it.

I notice Sarah trying to get away from her team to come over but my team kind of forces me to come with them into the locker room so I just leave it.

After some ice bathing and a shower we drive back to our hotel, its almost 11pm so most of my team mates go to bed. I follow Sophia into our shared room and we both get ready for bed.

The next day we drive back to Frankfurt and I pack my stuff for the international brake.

Since Laura Feiersinger, Barbara Dunst and I also play together for the Austrian national team, we also decided to fly back there together there tomorrow.

We’re actually some of the first ones to arrive in Vienna, some of our team mates are coming tomorrow because they had games today.

I get a text from Sarah saying that she's already in her room and asks me to come over, since the game we didn't really had a chance to talk.

We say Hello to our trainer team and some of our team mates who are still sitting around and chatting before dropping our stuff off, in our rooms.

I hesitate a little but then go over to Sarah’s room, I didn't even need to knock two times cause she's already at the door after my fist hit the door one time.

“Hey.” she says and just seeing her makes me realize how much I missed her during the last weeks.

“Hi.” I answer, she lets me inside and as the door closes behind me, I’m already wrapped in her arms, my face pressed into her shoulder.

She softly lifts me up and I wrap my legs around her body, I clink onto her like a koala bear baby on his mother.

“Jesus I didn't thought I could miss anyone that much.” she says, taking a deep breath before walking over to her bed and sitting down.

My body still attached to here's, like we're one.

“I missed you too, Zari.”

I feel her hand sliding under my shirt, but not in a sexual way, more like she needs to feel my skin to realize that I’m here.

Her love language has always been physical touch, so it's no surprise that she just needs a couple of minutes, to hold me like that, to process the last couple of weeks.

Fuck it's been really almost eight weeks since I last saw her.

“I’m sorry that you lost the game.” she says and pulls back a little, making eye contact with me.

“But I’m glad that you won, you’re going to play in the champions league.” I answer, of curse it still hurts a little but I can't be mad at her for doing her best.

“You’re not mad?”

“How could I ever be mad at you? Besides it's part of dating the best football player in the world.” I say and smile at her, noticing her cheeks getting slightly red.

“You really think I’m the best?”

“No.” I shake my head and lean closer.

“I know it.” I whisper the words in her ear, before softly leaving a trail of kisses over her cheek to her mouth.

“Is your name Google? Because you have everything I’ve been searching for.” she flirts as we brake apart, I roll my eyes but can't help and laugh.

“Where do you always get this lines from?” I ask and she shrugs.

“Maybe I’m just naturally good at flirting.”

“Well I hope that I'm the only one you're flirting with.”

“Who knows.” she says and I try to get up, but she quickly tightens her grip around me and pulls me back against her.

“You are my one and only.” she says and blinks a couple of times “I think there's something wrong with my eyes, because I can't take them off you.”

“Jesus Sarah you---”

Before I can finish my sentence the door flys open and Laura storms in.

“ZARI!!” she cheers, running towards us, she jumps on both of us and knocks us over so we all land on the mattress.

Me on top of Sarah and Laura half on top of me half on Sarah.

“Laura.” I whine but she just shakes her head, wrapping her arms around us.

“Sorry but you have to wait till later, with making out. Cause I missed my best friend.” Laura explains.

The sound of a camera flash goes through the room and I turn a bit to look up.

Manu is standing in the door, her camera in her hands.

Verena behind her shakes her head laughing.

“Laura let them have five minutes without you, they haven't seen each other in what seven or eight weeks?” she says.

Laura finally gets up from me and I’m able to take a deep breath.

“Hey, I haven't seen her in eight weeks too.” she says, crossing her arms in front of her.

“Jesus I didn't knew that you're that jealous.” Sarah gets up and softly pats her shoulder.

“Poor Laura.” I add with a sad voice.

“Just keep making fun of me.” Laura complains, faking a sad look on her face.

“Drama queen.” Manu says and I try to hold back my laughter.

“You all are so mean, Y/N didn't see Sarah in eight weeks and is allowed to be alone with her just because they're together. And I didn't see her in eight weeks and I’m not allowed to be alone with her because I’m just her best friend.”

I walk over and give her a side hug, resting my chin on her shoulder.

“You know what, you can have her for like 45 minutes alone with her, while I go and get myself something to eat.” I say and let go of her, walking out of the room.

“WAIT.” I hear Laura screaming behind me and turn around.

“I don't want Sarah, I want food.” she says, sprinting towards me and wrapping an arm around me.

“You know what.” Sarah says from the door “Now I feel alone. My girlfriend chooses food over me and my best friend is the same.”

“Poor Zari.” Laura mocks my voice from before, but I hold out my hand for her.

“You can come too, so you can be with me, I can be with you and Laura gets you and food.” I suggest.

“You two have this lesbian couple, that adopted some random twenty nine year old girl.” Manu says as we three walk past her.

“Honestly I feel like that too.” I whisper but feel Laura hitting my shoulder.

“Thanks Mom.”

“Stopp hitting my girlfriend.” Sarah demands and I let go of both of there hands.

“Okay, Manu can I eat with you, I can't stand you two any longer.” I say and walk over to the goalkeeper.

“Hey.” Laura and Sarah both complain but Manu pulls me away with her.

“Looks like I get your girl.” she says and honestly I wish someone would take a picture of their faces right now.

A mixture of not-knowing-if-they-should-laugh-or-cry and complete shock.

“You should see yourself right now.” Verena mages to get out in between her laughing.

And exactly the moments like these are why I love my team.

And why I love my girlfriend.

And sometimes even my girlfriends best friend.

#sarah zadrazil #oefb frauen #sarah zadrazil x reader #fc bayern frauen #fcbfrauen x reader #laura feiersinger #lina magull #woso x reader #woso imagine

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moonsandstar-s · 1 year

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i’m sorry guys i can’t contain myself bumbleby has me in tears not even 48 hours later and i just have to gush about all this

Anyways… looking back on this has me awestruck, honestly. This is a story we’ve been patiently and impatiently attending to for years, a mesh of writing and art and voices and storytelling and animation cobbled together from the hands of many and the initial vision of just one. That seems pretty incredible to me.

My first girlfriend introduced me to this show when I was 14. Just barely a high school freshman. It was 2015, and Volume 3 hadn’t aired yet. Monty had just passed away and a lot of you, in the FNDM, didn’t know what lay ahead for RWBY. I joined after the uncertainty, before everything that followed. What we had was Burning the Candle, a couple cast jokes, and a few teasing hints that were eventually dismissed by the doubtful. I contented myself with how unlikely a lesbian couple was to ever occur onscreen, and made do with my own imagination. I loved the rich imagery of Blake and Yang’s partnership, the allusions of it, everything it could be. I mourned that it would likely never come to pass and vowed to explore it in my own time, with my own plan.

In the years that followed, I wrote over a million words (I did tally this from my Ao3 account!) and grew enormously along the way. It was this that made me decide to major in English & creative writing at a time I wasn’t even sure I wanted to go to college (I will be graduating next month with a magna cum laude in my field, which I can’t even fathom!) I made friends whom I still talk to, to this day. I devoured absolutely gorgeous pieces of fiction that tended and grew the love from the seed we had seen in the canon show into a garden of extraordinary variety (special shoutout @lightsaroundyourvanity, @thirteenyasmin, @thecousinsdangereux and @pugoata)! I pored over breathtaking works of fan art (looking at you @frankielucky, @corvophobia and @frishbi). I saw some damn good analysis from so many people (hey @almea, @canonbumbleby, & @bumblebyaf!) I watched Blake and Yang throughout the FNDM’s shock at the end of V3, the infighting throughout V4 as it seemed our high hopes would culminate in nothing, our bated breath at their reunion as V5 ended, to our euphoria in V6, and now. We watched, doubting and wondering and celebrating, as incrementally, Blake and Yang found their way back together first in presence, then in spirit. All the while, wondering, will-they-or-won’t-they?

I hoped so much, and doubted just as often, as many of you did, too. Prior to ever watching RWBY, I’d realized I was gay, but hadn’t ever expected to see someone like me represented in something I loved - at least not in a way where it wasn’t their whole identity rather than just another part, like loving the color blue or preferring coffee to tea. When we watched Lexa get shot, when we saw show after show with lesbian couples result in cancellation, when we became merely a moment in a finale or a passing scene, easily dismissed, it became so easy to let discouragement be the loudest voice of all.

But sometimes persistence pays off. Sometimes you do get to see the things you’ve loved for so long become more than wishful thinking. Sometimes you get days like yesterday. Where some of us cried, most of us laughed, and we all collectively lost our fucking minds in a way that felt like being a little kid again where everything just feels right.

I guess what I want to say is this: eight years passed. I am not the same person I was when I fell in love with the love that hadn’t even grown enough to be named as such between Blake and Yang. But that girl does live inside of me still, and yesterday, I got to celebrate with her just as freely as she did with me. Over the moon for all of this. Thank you CRWBY, thank you Eddy, Kerry, Arryn, Barbara, Yssa, Miles, and every other animator, concept artist, scriptwriter, every person who had even the slightest hand in making this possible. What a time to be alive!

#please feel free to reblog with your own stories because i just ADORE hearing them #i am on cloud 9 and never coming down #RWBY #RWBY 9 #RWBY spoilers #RWBY V9 #RWBY Volume 9 #Bumbleby #Blake Belladonna #Yang Xiao Long #if i forgot to tag you i love you and let me know so o can please add you in… there’s just been so many people over the years… EIGHT YEARS!#V9E6

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