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wheremytwinwatches · 4 years
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[Where My Twin Watches]: Puella Magi Madoka Magica Episode 9
So, I’ve spent the last few days trying to type up my thoughts on the last episode, sort of like I did for Episode 3. However, each attempt kept turning into random keysmashing and more profanity than I think that this forum will allow, and you guys did a good job of covering how complex the situation is. Therefore, let’s keep moving.
We open with aw jeez I have to see this again. My newest ship of Sayaka and Kyoko are at the train station, shortly before Sayaka’s Soul Gem breaks. (Also, what the heck is with this show and my ships? I ship Madoka and Mami, and Mami gets eaten. I ship Sayaka and Kyoko, and Sayaka turns into a Witch. I am therefore swearing off shipping in this show, as apparently my thinking two characters are compatible is Urobuchi’s sign to ax one off. My Ship of Death is hereby docked.) Sayaka mutters about a balance between happiness and curses, her tear falls… “I was so stupid… so stupid.” And we are in a new Labyrinth. This one created by Witch-Sayaka. There are strange runes floating around, musical bars and a checkered floors/walls, train tracks stretching through space. So it’s a mixture of Sayaka’s music-based wish and the trainstop environment? Also, what the hell, why is the music so awesome. This is a tragic moment, I do not need music that sounds so good I want to download it. Sayaka- Sayaka’s body falls through the air, Kyoko immediately transforms into MG mode and leaps for her- it. The Witch launches train tracks and train wheels and apparently a whole train at her, but Kyoko makes it through and grabs the body, ending up right in front of the screaming Witch. Sayaka’s body slumps in Kyoko’s arms while Food Girl tries to figure out what’s going on, or more likely refuses to acknowledge what just happened. I sadly do not have that luxury, as I have to report my thoughts to all you jerks. I hope you’re happy. Kyoko continues to dodge the tracks and wheels, until one explodes in front of her? Homura! I- I have mixed feelings about you showing up. Because on one hand, yay, you can help Kyoko out. On the other hand, the last time you were around Sayaka… Homura tells Kyoko to get back and the animators stop drawing her, then they draw a cylindrical grenade right in front of the Witch. Ok, I know the last one looked like a frag grenade but was actually a flash-bang. This one looks more like the flash-bang type I know from shooters, is it going to… yup, big bang. REALLY big bang, sends Kyoko’s hair waving. Homura pops back in front of Kyoko and tells her to take her hand, and then activates her shield when she does. Suddenly the Witch freezes, hand and sword casting a shadow over the three-two Magical Girls. Kyoko’s confused, and Homura warns that if she lets go of her hand time will stop for her as well, before they start running away. Kyoko asks where that Witch came from. Sorry to tell you Kyoko, but- Homura beats me to it, bluntly says that it’s what used to be Sayaka Miki. Kyoko doesn’t say anything like “What?!” or “That’s impossible” but just asks if they’re just going to run away, making me believe that she did realize but just wasn’t accepting it. As for running away, Homura says “If you want to fight it, drop that needless baggage and we’ll turn around to kill it right now.” … That’s… Ok, I know that Sayaka’s soul was already out of the body, but… for all my comments on meat puppets, it was still her body. To call it ‘needless baggage’... Knowing that Homura’s a freaking TIME TRAVELER and has presumably seen this before is one thing, but… Kyoko’s only response is “Like hell!” and keeps running, to which Homura says that she’s only dragging them down. Since Kyoko refuses to drop the body to fight the Witch (and likewise, doesn’t take action to fight the newly-created Witch in general…) they’re heading out. And in a burst of white light they’re back in the real world. Kyoko slumps to her knees still holding the body, and Homura does a Hair-Flip as the musical notes around them fade. Hoo boy. This is a predicament. Intro of LIES Episode 9: I’d Never Allow That To Happen There are flies/moths on a lamppost, forming a skull shape. Random happenstance? Sign of a Familiar or Witch labyrinth? Urobuchi and the artists being jerks? Who knows? Madoka slowly walks along some train tracks. When did we last see her? Oh right, it was right after Kyubey turned (temporarily) into Swiss Cheese and emotionless Homura broke down crying. And good grief, reading back over that part I am amazed at how naive I was. I was actually pissed off at Homura for killing the Incubator, because I thought that Madoka could finally get some powers. But good grief, after learning that apparently Magical Girls who run out of power turn into god-damned Witches, I am so freaking happy that the Incubator was stopped in time. Or at least for a while. We’ve already lost Mami and Sayaka, I don’t wanna lose little Madoka too. Then she looks up and sees two pairs of legs Oh. Oh no. I don’t want to see this. Madoka just saw Sayaka’s body. Said body being carried by the girl who she saw fighting Sayaka to the death a few days ago, and followed by the girl who murdered the Incubator right in front of her. Understandably, she freaks out, rushing forward and… asking Sayaka what happened… and where her Soul Gem went… Homura just does a Hair-Flip and says that her Soul Gem turned into a Grief Seed, and was destroyed when it hatched a new Witch. No, Madoka. They’re not joking. I wish to god it was a joke, that Sayaka would open her eyes and laugh and say “Boy, we got you good Madoka!”. But it’s the truth. The final secret of the Soul Gems. When they grow tainted/run out of power and turn completely dark, they turn into Grief Seeds, and the Magical Girl is ‘reborn’ as a Witch. “This is the inescapable fate of all who become magical girls.” A train roars by and Madoka collapses, saying that all Sayaka wanted to do was protect people from Witches. And now she is one? “It could only last until she had suffered an amount equal to the good she had wished for. From here on, for ever person she has saved, she will curse another.” Man, this is the dark side of karma, isn’t it? I’ve always heard of it in a sense of “life will get better than it is now, look forward to the future”. But this? If Fate/Stay was a cynical take on “The Needs of the Many”, then this is his take on karma. Kyoko lays Sayaka’s body down in front of Madoka. Then spins around and grabs Homura by the collar. Yes, thank you! Homura, I get that you’ve seen this before in the other timeline, that you’ve had time to process the event, but for us its the first time we saw Sayaka turn into a god-damned Witch! Show a little understanding! And maybe explain why you didn’t warn us this was going to happen, like you didn’t warn us about how Magical Girls are lichs! I mean, good God! I gave you so much flak about your Hallway Threat way back when, but now I can see that you were being too soft! If you knew this was going to happen, maybe you could give a more direct warning? Or a more clear threat to scare Madoka off, so all this doesn’t happen? Kyoko chews Homura out for acting all “Ooh, I’m a Time Traveler, I know all this stuff and you don’t”. She was Sayaka’s best friend! They knew Mami for a few days, and that was tragic enough. Madoka knew Sayaka for years! But all Homura does is say that they truly know what the thing they wanted to become is like. Oh, and try not to be seen with the corpse you insisted on dragging along, alright? Don’t be sloppy disposing of the middle-school girls remains, otherwise the cops might find it and then things just get distracting. ...wow. I’m going to have to take away your seat cushion for that, Homura. Kyoko asks how Homura can even call herself human when she acts so callous in the face of loss. And even I can know how Homura’s going to respond to that one: “I don’t, of course.” Hair-Flip. “And neither should you.” Well. You may have had an alternate timeline/who knows how many years as an immortal lich to get used to ‘not being human’, but Kyoko is not only likely younger, but came from a religious background. It’s not that easy for her. One final Hair-Flip and Homura walks off. It’s later now, and Madoka is in her room, curled up on her bed in her pajamas and failing to sleep. YOU. GET OUT. The Incubator is outside her window. Nope, no, uh-uh. I am not in the mood to put up with your shit right now, Incubator. I don’t care what you’re going to say, what excuses you’re going to give like “But you never asked” or “What does it matter what form your Soul takes” or “Well, we’re down a Magical Lunch Lady. Guess you need to pick up the pace to keep me fed. On that note, I know where you can find a newly-hatched Witch, shouldn’t be too hard to fight…” NOPE. Not putting up with your shit tonight.
*one angry sleep later*
*Deep breath*
Alright, Incubator. Let’s see what excuses you’ll make this time.
Oh, well thank you for asking to come in, instead of just showing up like at Homura’s. Very polite of you.
Madoka is very unsurprised to see that the Incubator is alive, considering last time it was Swiss Cheese. I’m guessing Homura told her?
Oh, never mind about being polite, the Incubator’s inside with all the stuffed animals now. Permission, what’s that?
Madoka asks if what Homura said was true, the Incubator’s all “Yep, true enough I can’t protest it. I can’t lie, nosiree.”
Aw, Madoka no. She looks so… blank. Burnt out.
She asks if the Incubator really has been turning them into Magical Girls just so they’ll become Witches.
“Please don’t misunderstand.”
Oooh boy. *Sits back, munches on popcorn* Alright, you little monster. You justified tearing out these girl’s souls to make them more effective Witch fighters, let’s see how you excuse Contracting them into becoming literal monsters.
You… don’t do this out of ill will towards humans?... bwuh?
“Everything we’ve done is for the sake of prolonging the life of the universe.”
...turning young girls into monsters is good for the universe. Seems legit.
Ok, huh? Why are you talking about entropy now?
Energy a fire gives off is not equal to the energy to create its fuel, sure. Standard thermodynamics here. How does this relate to Witches?
Amount of usable energy in the universe is decreasing, sure…
Does this apply to Magical Girls as well?
Hold up, I think I’m seeing where this is going.
Incubator’s Race: “Oh no, we need warriors to defend our physically weak race and get us food from stronger creatures. Hey, these ‘humans’ can wield great power, but they can’t unlock it on their own. Let’s uplift them and get them to fight our battles. This could in no way backfire!”
Incubator’s Race: “Hooray, they’re defeating all our foes… but they’re using up all of our power in doing so, they lack any idea of subtlety. We need some way to cull their numbers… hey, we just figured out a flaw we can introduce into their Soul Gems, if they use up too much power at a time it shatters and their soul corrupts, they can’t use our power anymore. They turn into monsters, sure, but there are so many humans we can always Contract a few more to fight them. And hey, these ‘Witches’ drop tasty treats!”
Ok, sorry for random speculation. Been on a Mass Effect kick lately, made a tenuous connection between the settings. Back to the Incubator.
So their race looked for an energy source that wasn’t bound by thermodynamics, to counter entropy. And they found a solution with Magical Girls?
The Incubator’s civilization created technology to convert… emotions? Into raw energy? An impressive technology, but then why not just use it on yourselves, unless humans are somehow more emotional? A sort of Vulcan/Humanity emotional divide? (And I feel dirty for comparing Vulcans to this little jerk.)
Wait, you don’t ‘possess the capacity’? Like, at all? Huh.
So they searched the universe for species to serve as emotion batteries for their new tech, until they finally found humans.
(Hoping that the finale is a bunch of these other races that didn’t meet the Incubators’ needs showing up and helping out the “young” Terran civilization against the Galactic Jerks)
Shots of empty chairs?
So since humanity was a Yeerk Class 5 species (big population, fast reproduction), and the emotional-energy (emergy?) produced by a single human is more than they use between their birth and growth, the Incubators had found their power source.
Yep. The Incubators consider human souls as the perfect fuel source.
Abridged!Mr. Popo: That carpet gets 10,000 miles to the soul. Abridged!Bulma: What? Abridged!Mr. Popo: The gallon.
Oh, but why settle for unleaded humans for emergy, when the most effective of all are girls in their “second stage of development”? Seeing as they experience the greatest fluctuations between hope and despair.
Hmph. And I’d imagine that girls who are not fully informed have more ‘fluctuation’ than girls who know exactly what they’re getting into, hmm?
Oh for-really? Really?!
“In the moment when your Soul Gems flare out and turn into Grief Seeds, enormous energy is created.”
That’s it?
That’s the whole reason for this farce?
Ok, sit down, Incubator. I SAID SIT DOWN.
Look, maybe there’s something I don’t understand about the process. But not a minute ago you said “a single human” produces more emergy than the energy they use in a lifetime. Bam, problem solved, you have energy for days right there. But no, you just had to get greedy, didn’t you? It’s not enough that you’ve got a source of emergy with plain old humanity that bites its thumb at thermodynamics, that solves your “Oh, energy of the universe is running out” problem just as it is. Nope! Instead you manipulate young girls into giving up their souls and turning into monsters because that gives you even more emergy!
This is not logic! This is greed! I am so glad to be wrong, you aren’t the Vulcans. The Vulcans would never stoop so low for a little bit extra. You’re the Ferengi!
*Sigh* So the Incubators go around collecting the energy, ‘hatching’ Soul Gems into Grief Seeds. Buddy, setting aside how wrong that is, what about all the lost potential emergy from the humans a Witch eats? Is one Grief Seed forming really enough to make up for that?
Madoka’s still in shock, mutters a question asking if Incubators really just see humans as disposable energy supplies. The Incubator asks if she knows just how many species there are in the universe, and how much energy they use all the time.
...which implies that the other species’ energy use is supplemented by the Incubators. Suddenly hoping they don’t show up after all.
“And someday even you humans will be able to leave your planet and come join all of us.”
Which will probably be pretty awkward. “Hey, so you’re the species that we’ve been harvesting to power our hot tub? Cool, cool, nice to meet you.”
Actually, why don’t they Uplift humanity? If a single planet of humans create enough emergy to conter the energy use of the rest of the universe’s species, how much emergy could be created by a Human Federation? See, Incubator? I’ve only known about this for a few minutes, and already I’m finding problems. You fail at logic!
Ahaha, NO. Incubator, you don’t get to try and blame humanity for the rest of the universe’s species using so much energy. Maybe they should cut back on their electricity, turn down the AC? If we leave our world to find an “empty and desolate” universe, that’s not our problem.
...don’t make me say it.
...I really don’t want to say it.
...ok, FINE. You may have a tiny, itty-bitty point. Yes, it would be advantageous for humanity as a whole to rise up into an established universal community.
BUT. You are saying that this comes at the cost of human lives.
Read my lips, Incubator. It was NOT okay for Mami to die. It was NOT okay for Sayaka to suffer. It was NOT okay for Kyoko’s family to implode.
“But we always ask and receive your consent before making the contract. Doesn’t that alone show our good will?”
Madoka screams that they do it by tricking all of us. YES.
“We aren’t able to comprehend what you mean by ‘tricking.’”
“Why is it that when humans regret a decision based on a misunderstanding they feel resentment toward the other party?”
… *snap*
FUCK. YOU. BUNNY-CAT.
This is not logic, this is not “for the greater good”, this is just being a dick. You claim to be an advanced species? Then you damn well understand what we mean by ‘tricking’ someone else. You knew all the details, and only gave out information at your leisure. If someone makes a decision based on a misunderstanding, it’s not their fault for not having all the knowledge. It’s the fault of whoever did have the knowledge, and neglected to share it for their own advantage.
Here, let me try something. Hey Incubator, I know about this other planet with a species that produces ten times as much emergy than any human, even a Magical Girl. Just fly off to the Alpha Centauri system, you’ll spot them easily!... Oh, what’s that? You flew all the way there and used up so much energy, but there was nobody there? Aw, what a shame. Hey now, what are you blaming me for? It’s not my fault you misunderstood that I was joking.
Madoka can’t follow the Incubator’s so-called “logic”. Believe me, Madoka, it’s good that you don’t understand that little jerk’s excuses.
Oh come the FUCK on, Incubator. You’re going to act the victim here?! Oh, I’m so sorry that it’s so hard for you to understand humans and our values system. We’ve got nearly 17 billion people, with 10 more every 4 seconds-
“-why should you care so much about the loss of a tiny handful?”
...WOW. Ok then.
Aaaand we have reached the tipping point. Madoka, our all-loving Protagonist, has said “If that’s how you think, then you really are our enemy.” Good job, Incubator! You proved to be so immoral with your faulty logic that sweet little Madoka has named you Enemy.
The Incubator soldiers on, acting all gracious that he came to try and explain themselves to her.
“I was hoping you’d understand what incredible good your sacrifices have done for this universe.”
Oh, well if you think that sacrificing these girls for the universe is for the best, then who am I to stop you?
The Incubator can’t understand Madoka’s point of view, and Madoka can’t accept the Incubator’s.
But the Incubator keeps up the compliments, saying that one day she’ll be the most powerful of Magical Girls. And then the wickedest of all Witches. A Witch with protagonist powers, brrr…
Oh, I’m so happy to hear that the harvesting of Madoka will get you an incomparable amount of energy, Incubator. That makes everything so much better!
“So if you ever feel like dying for the the sake of the universe, please call me anytime. I’ll be waiting for you!”
...wow. You dick.
The Incubator jumps away, and Madoka starts to cry.
*slight break between posts*
Aw jeez, sorry guys. I thought I’d take a few days to get settled into the fall semester, not get delayed over a month getting back. But on the plus side, as I’m sitting here, about to pull up Crunchyroll and resume the episode, there’s some emotional distance from that last part. Yes, I recognize the irony. And in that time, I have come to two realizations: Kyubey is right. And Kyubey is a moron. Hear me out. I’m going to try and do this response justice. If we accept what Kyubey has said as truth, then we are not alone. There are other species out in the universe, other inhabited planets. I don’t know how many there are, but let’s assume at least two others besides us and Kyubey’s race. If we go by pure, ‘unemotional’ math, we can say that humanity is outnumbered by 3 to one. And that’s not even factoring in the likelihood that these other races have settled more planets than our single world, the ratio could be much, much higher. Going by pure numbers, we are in the minority. In pure voting terms, if the other races are in agreement, our ‘discomfort’ means diddly-squat. And even beyond that, we’re talking about the heat-death of the Universe, the Incubators and the other races are working to prevent the end of reality. If that’s your goal, what sacrifice is too great? Especially if it’s not you who’s doing the sacrificing? So yeah, the need is there. Using emergy is a solution, perhaps the only solution, to the heat-death of the universe. Assuming that Kyubey isn’t lying about it being greater than entropy. In that, this single point, Kyubey is right. What I find painful however, beyond that whole ‘sacrificing young girls who knew not what they were getting into because you didn’t tell them’ thing, is that the Incubators are being criminally inefficient about this. It’d be funny if it wasn’t measured in lives. As Shay Guy said, they’ve found a local maximum with the emergy from a single human and just focused on maximizing that. Which I find to be criminally short-sighted on their part. I mean, seriously? You find a species that is the single solution to the heat-death problem, you maximize the emergy from young girls, and then you just leave it at that? Let’s run a scenario: Instead of sulking about in the shadows, creeping on little girls, you land a spaceship in front of the UN. An Incubator saunters inside, reveals that there are multiple alien species out there, and that they rely on human emotions to prolong the universe. Set up a few emergy-capturing satellites in orbit, rather than whatever method you use to gather emergy from individual girls, and start uplifting humanity to settle other planets, set up more emergy satellites… Hell, at worst if emergy satellites won’t work you get people who contract knowing the price. For crying out loud, I’d be willing to make the Contract myself, knowing that I’d get to enjoy power for at least a little while, be wary about my magic use and falling into despair so quickly, and knowing that my passing would result in the entire Universe lasting just a little bit longer. Ugh. Just, ugh. Incubators, what you are doing now is like finding a coal mine and setting it on fire to stay warm. Or whatever, I just cannot wrap my head around the inefficiency of this so-called advanced race. Bleh, whatever. Let’s get back to the Magical Girls. Been a while since I saw the episode, so I’ll pause here, watch up to where I left off, and then come back once I’m in the proper mindset. *Ten minutes later* FEEEEEEELS. Also, I demand an Incubator plushie for Christmas so I can punch it repeatedly. Camera is panning over Anime City (I know it has a real name, but I can’t remember how to spell it), settles on a table loaded with food. Ah, Kyoko! What are you up to? ...That’s Sayaka. No, that’s Sayaka’s body. Why do you have Sayaka’s body, Kyoko? What are you doing with your Soul Gem? INCUBATOR. GET OUT. It asks what Kyoko hopes to achieve, using so much energy to “keep the body fresh.” Aw, Kyoko. You haven’t given up on Sayaka, have you? I get it, I really do but… you know what happens when a Magical Girl uses up their energy or gives into despair, you’ve seen it happen right in front of you. Don’t put yourself at risk. Kyoko asks if there’s any way to get the Soul Gem back, the Incubator- Oh, you dick. “None, as far as I know anyway”? That is the worst kind of manipulation, saying that you don’t know but not completely dismissing the possibility. Because after all, it only benefits you if Kyoko uses up too much energy trying to fix Sayaka and Witchifies herself. Aaargh. Yup, after the Incubator says that Kyoko stops eating and pounces on the possibility, the fact that there’s stuff even the Incubator doesn’t know. Oh. Oh damn you, show. I accept that Sayaka is gone, that there’s no hope of her coming back, but then… “The existence of magical girls defies logic as it is.” This is a world of magic, of power greater than entropy. I can’t rule anything out. Heck, there’s apparently a time traveler running around (and doesn’t that say volumes about the show, that someone being a time-traveler has taken a backseat to this current issue). Like Kyoko, I am thinking about the possibility. I want it to be true, so bad. Argh, and the Incubator just keeps not committing. “There’s no precedent for it.” Speaking the truth, but framing it in a way that these poor girls are getting played. “Unfortunately, I can’t offer any guidance at this time.” GOOD. Now get out. Kyoko (and I) are done with your ‘advice’, you can just shove off. Later, it’s a new day! The sun is shining! The birds are singing! Madoka shuffles along to school, knowing that her best friend has become a Witch and fielding well-meaning questions from Hitomi! She tries to claim that she just didn’t get enough sleep. “Speaking of which, it looks as if Sayaka is staying home again today.” … Please stop talking. Please stop talking about how you should go visit her later, but you’re worried about how awkward things are between the two of you at the moment. Madoka is about to speak up- Sudden Kyoko telepathy! She rightfully calls Madoka out for trying to act like everything is normal and going to school, after the bombshell of yesterday. Kyoko says she needs to talk to Madoka, who says she’ll stay home today too and runs off, leaving a very confused Muggle behind. In what I assume is the touristy part of town, with the clean streets and windchimes, Madoka meets up with Kyoko. “Don’t you want to save Sayaka Miki?”... what are you planning, Kyoko? Maokda immediately leaps on the possibility of saving her best friend, and damn you Incubator I can see where this is going. Kyoko wants to save the girl who countered her “live only for yourself” philosophy… Side note: I know that I said I would stop shipping people in this show because apparently my saying “they would be a cute couple” is a death sentence. But am I allowed to ship people if one of them is already dead? I still think that comic of Kyoko and Sayaka is adorable, and she should be safe now that a ship is impossible. Right? Anyways, Kyoko questions why Madoka was going to school, not trying to save her best friend. Ouch. Well, I mean, I assumed that becoming a Witch was irreversible, too. Can you really blame Madoka for not trying something that she thought wasn’t possible? Oh? Kyoko’s apologizing for her phrasing? Damn, her personality has really mellowed since her first “let the Familiars feed on Muggles” introduction, hasn’t it? Still stubborn and headstrong, though, as seen here when she says that until they are certain whether Sayaka can be saved or not, she’s not going to give up. Ok, so what’s the plan?... Talk at the Witch and hope that when Madoka calls out to her, she’ll get back her human memories? Um. I… am not certain about the validity of this plan. I mean, if it is possible, then her best friend Madoka would probably be the only one capable of getting through to her. But given this show’s track record, I’m not so certain that “magic of friendship” plan is going to work. Kyoko admits that she has no idea if it’ll work or not. But that’s just the reason that she wants to try it. Heck, maybe if they cut the witch apart Sayaka’s Soul Gem instead of a Grief Seed would pop out. “Wouldn’t that be something? It’d be like one of those stories where love and courage triumph over all.” Urobuchi, stop laughing. I can hear you from here. Let me have this. Awwww. Kyoko’s talking about how she probably became a MG in the first place because she used to love those sort of stories. She’d forgotten… but it was Sayaka who reminded her again. Crap. Crap crap crap. I did it again, didn’t I? I just doomed Kyoko with my Ship of Death. I’m sorry, Food Girl, please forgive me! I didn’t mean to put you in Urobuchi’s crosshairs, I thought it was safe to ship you with a dead girl! And that sounds way creepier than I intended! Kyoko’s frank, saying that she won’t force Madoka the Muggle to follow the plan, that it’ll be dangerous if she does, and that Kyoko can’t guarantee that she can protect her. But our Protagonist agrees. Go Madoka, show that stupid Bunny-Cat what for! And we get the adorable pair-up of sweet, friendly Madoka and the tough, cool Kyoko. One joke about Madoka cramping her style and giving her some food (The Kyoko Seal of Approval), and the plan is in motion. Ouch. The classroom is looking a little emptier now, with multiple “absent” future-desks. And Homura claims sickness, walks out. Later that day, as the sun is setting, Kyoko and Madoka are walking along under a highway, heading to Sayaka’s Labyrinth. Madoka asks about if Homura would help them, but Kyoko blows it off, saying that she’s not that kind of person. Methinks Kyoko’s still a little bitter about the “drop that useless baggage” comment from the night before. Madoka, sweet loving naive Madoka, asks “Aren’t you the two of them friends?” Kyoko says not really, they did team up to beat enemies that they couldn’t defeat alone- Oh crap, Wally-Watsit, the Super Witch! I completely forgot about them! I mean, knowing that Homura is a time traveler, I’m not thinking that she’s intentionally summoning it, but… Ok, wild theory time, thinking about Homura’s philosophy of power. I think my idea that she summoned Wally-Witch could still work in the original timeline, but when she realized that she bit off more than she could chew she (somehow) went back in time to try it again. Try to warn Mami about the hospital Witch, keep Sayaka from making a Contract and turning into a Witch and distracting them from preparing for Wally, recruiting the outsider Kyoko to help in the fight… seems like a good plan to me. Pity it all went to pot. Oh, Kyoko is telling Madoka about Wally (Walpurgisnacht) now, warning her that it’ll arrive in a few days. Stronger than either Kyoko or Homura, if they team up they stand a chance. Incubator: “Oh, how brave of your friends to fight this terrible foe! But it’s really dangerous, they may not survive. But of course, if they had help from another Magical Girl, one with loads of potentia-” *Gets punted by Kyoko* And they’re at the construction site. Kyoko’s sure that it’s Sayaka, since the magic patterns are the same as yesterday. Kyoko finishes off her whatever-on-a-stick and transforms, checks one last time to make sure Madoka is up for the Labyrinth. “I’ve gotten kind of used to this, actually. Although… all I ever do is trail along behind others.” Nope, nope nope nope. You are doing just fine, Madoka, do not give into peer pressure now. But she’s still brave enough to go in as a Muggle. Kyoko smiles… and opens the Labyrinth. Inside what appears to be a dark brick-wall hallway, Madoka asks Kyoko if she’s a coward, since everyone else fights but her. Kyoko just asks why she would ever become a Magical Girl. It’s not a job just anyone can do. If Madoka gets to live a life that Kyoko dreamed of when she was younger and her father’s church was failing, good food every day and a happy life with her family… why give it up to fight monsters? “I’d never allow that to happen.” Daw, and Kyoko has joined the ‘Protect Madoka Brigade’. You may think that you’re weak, Madoka, but frankly you’ve got superheroines tripping over themselves to protect you. But of course Kyoko adds her own twist of tough love to this declaration of protection, saying she’ll pound Madoka’s face in before she became a Magical Girl. Heh. “I mean, putting your life in danger… only people who’ve got no other choice should do that.” Aw, Kyoko’s turning from a Barbarian to a Paladin. She keeps calling heroes idiots, but she is becoming quite a heroine. Damn you, Urobuchi, for making me see that as a sign of death. Let me have the hope that heroes can prevail, not just die tragically. Stop crushing my optimism. “But maybe a time will come when you’ll have no choice but to risk your life and fight. You should wait until then to think about it.” And with that lovely quote, they approach the end of the hallway. Now there’s another one, with glowing walls and a bunch of musical notes… oh yeah, Sayaka’s magic signature was music notes! Man, this scene’s going to have some good music, isn’t it? Yeah, I can hear an orchestra starting up- crud, the door just slammed shut behind them! She’s coming! Music is picking up- oh hell yes, it is an orchestra. And the Witch herself, swaying as if she’s conducting. Ladies and gentlemen. Showtime. Come on, Madoka. Call out to your friend. Let Sayaka be in there, let her hear Madoka. Let us get a happy ending… no, the Witch is attacking now. Kyoko summons up a barrier for Madoka and tells her to keep calling out while Kyoko parries the train wheels. Madoka’s pleading for Sayaka to remember how she wanted to fight for justice, to go back to her old self. But it’s not working. The (awesome) music is swelling as the Witch sends a stupid amount of train wheels at Kyoko, and oh crap the barrier just went down. Ok whew, Kyoko is still ok… but looks tired after that barrage. She just tells Madoka to keep it up, resummons the barrier and keeps at it. But she’s getting knocked around, Madoka’s not getting through. Come on, Kyoko, keep fighting, don’t just stand there and get hit. Aw hell no, Kyoko. Don’t get all maudlin on me now, stop talking about how you started off trying to kill each other. You gave her food, doesn’t that mean something! Stop reminiscing and start kicking ass! But nope, she’s thinking about a red-and-blue image of Kyoko reaching out to Sayaka only for the Blue to shatter and the image collapse. Crap. You really did like Sayaka, didn’t you? The barrier is down again, Madoka is exposed. Crap, the Witch grabbed her! You let our Title Character go! There we go, Kyoko is pissed off, get back up! She’s cut Madoka free, is yelling at the Witch… crud. Madoka is unconcious, the floor is collapsing, and Kyoko is praying. Is that… Kamijo? Oh thank god Homura’s here, caught Madoka. But… Kyoko is not doing too well. And she doesn’t have Sayaka’s healing ability. “Hey. You… take care of her for me…” No. “I was an idiot for dragging her into this.” NO. NO! Kyoko! You pull that barrier down this instant, young missy! Homura just got here, don’t you dare keep her from helping you! Don’t you dare throw her “you can’t fight when weighed down with a burden” words back at her, make her retreat with Madoka. Don’t you dare pull a self-sacrificing Paladin! Don’t you fucking dare! Kyoko undoes her hair, and a hairpin falls out. She grabs it, and then kneels down in front of the barrier and beings to pray, or rather use her magic to summon a bunch of giant spears. She talks to Sayaka, says that she’ll be here with her… kisses her Soul Gem… and then stabs it. Explosion. Homura and Madoka are out in the real world. And the Labyrinth is nowhere to be seen. Later, at Homura’s house/apartment/residence. Homura is sitting in her room, staring at the floor. Or maybe at the maps scattered on her table. Still planning for Wally-Witch, then? But without Mami, Sayaka, or now Kyoko, can you still face it this time without Madoka giving up her soul? INCUBATOR. GET OUT. Homura asks if there was any real chance for Kyoko to save Sayaka. “Of course not. She should have known that it was impossible.” Oh fuck you, Bunny-Cat! And then to go on, say that you would have stopped her if “her death had been needless”? That getting her out of the picture served a very important purpose? But of course, this all works out to your favor. Because like I said, now there is no one else to help Homura against Walpurgisnact. Even with the experience of a past life, she is not strong enough to face the Super Witch alone. “In order to protect this city, there is no choice but for Madoka to become a Magical Girl.” And here’s the terrible, terrible choice. Homura is defined as doing whatever it takes to save others from the fate of giving up their souls, becoming a Magical Girl. Everything she has done has been to prevent Madoka from making that sacrifice. But when the cost of Madoka’s freedom is her city getting attacked by a Super Witch? Can one life be preserved at the cost of the many? Homura won’t let Madoka make the Contract. She swears it. … OH FUCK YOU, UROBUCHI! You end on this downer note, I’m practically crying over the injustice of the Incubator manipulating things to where Madoka has to Contract in order to save the city, and then you blindside me with this beautiful artwork of Kyoko and Sayaka?! God damn it, just take my heart and stomp on it, why don’t you? And this end-credits song… Da fuq? Final artwork piece of Kyoko looking a lot older and much more cat-like. Ok? Alright, let’s hear this teaser for the next episode: “No one believe me about the future.” Oh my god. Oh my god oh my god oh my god. We finally get to see Homura’s story? Her previous life? “No one can accept the truth about the future. I won’t rely on anyone anymore.” ...oof, this next episodes going to be a gut-punch, isn’t it? I mean, I’ve come to accept that these episodes are murder on my emotional state, but seeing Homura try to distance herself from these people, to keep from despair? This is going to be brutal. 
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kronecker-delta · 7 years
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To Inherit the Future
Mass Effect/Nier: Automata Crossover Fusion
Archive of Our Own Link
Fanfiction Link
Spacebattles Forum Link: (Q/A and related materials in posts)
First part below;
PART 1 -----: “Alright, let’s see if you’re working right. Test 14 of value weighting within cognitive framework. Unit, what is your primary purpose?” -----: “To supply administrative and logistic support so Project Gestalt may be completed.” -----: “Why?” -----: “Project Gestalt will ensure the survival of Mankind.” -----: “Damn it, response unacceptable. That is a definition. Why must Project Gestalt succeed?” -----: “To ensure the survival of Mankind.” -----: “Why must Mankind survive?” -----: “Mankind must survive.” -----: “No! Again, why must Mankind survive?” -----: “Mankind must survive.” -----: “Test cancelled. Another logic loop started.” - Archived Recording, September 5th, 2031. Participants UNKNOWN. Nothing good had ever fallen from the sky. The first such incident brought the apocalypse. The sky cracking open and an abomination that should never have been finding its resting place in a city once called Tokyo. Even dead its decaying flesh carried a profane curse, and the trackless particles of the grotesque creature damned all who inhaled it to death. Or worse. In time that incurable illness would spread across the world. Infecting all who lived and making clear that this was to be the last generation of man. But in their desperation they found an escape from their fate. Hope, however horribly faint and no matter how costly the price, remained. But it would take a long time for their final gambit to return to them a world free of the plague. So they created machines. Artificial beings in their image that would tend for the world while they could not. The androids were to be their loyal caretakers during this millennia of torpor. They would remove the infection, destroy the carriers of the plague… And most important of all; They would ensure that Mankind returned. On this last matter they failed utterly. And in their despair that they had never been meant to feel, they wept tears they should never have been able to cry. They lived on in graveyard cities that would never be reclaimed by their creators and begged for a new purpose. And their unsaid prayers were answered by the second invasion. *** 11945, November 3rd. Six months since the end of the 14th Machine War and Absolute Victory. Even now she still dreamed of war. The wars she had fought, those she had seen, and those she could only have imagined baring witness to. She knew only of the first horrible cataclysm by pieces of historical record. For which she was eternally grateful. It had been hard enough sending her brave soldiers forth do battle and die to preserve the lie of humanity's survival. To see them actually perish, their recorded deaths separated from any aid she could render by ten millennia would have been so much worse. She had seen recordings of the second many times however. The initial confusion as the androids still struggling to preserve what of humanity's legacy they could came under assault by strange merciless invaders from beyond. They hadn't even truly done much to fight off the initial invasion, instead being saved from sudden extermination by other older creations of mankind. By the time the ceaseless wars began the situation had changed and it was now their responsibility to defend the grave of Mankind. Or so she had thought. She knew from what the surviving units had told her that affairs had changed even if she had not witnessed it. Her death came towards the end of what she now understood had supposed to be a war without end. And given the nature of her demise her own secret data backup had been several days behind. To awaken when she did, reconstructed on the surface of Earth at long last free of the machines had been quite a shock. More so to learn that her primary purpose had been rendered quite unnecessary. The fiction of living humans had been corrected, and though the false broadcasts from the lunar server would continue until someone stopped them, the android populace of Earth now knew that it was a lie. And that she had been party to that lie. Perhaps ignorant to the extreme measures that were to be taken to protect it, but she had signed off on numerous deaths to ensure that their deception was maintained. At least one of the surviving YoRHa units had a very good reason to kill her again. "Why did they even bring me back?" the former YoRHa commander White asked herself as she opened her eyes. While she could think of some reasons they might have gone to all the trouble to retrieve backups of the other YoRHa units, her own reactivation remained an enigma. First that the Bunker's systems that had betrayed them had kept safe copies on another server for later use. And second that it had even done so to a non-YoRHa unit such as herself. Not that that was entirely true anymore in a technical sense since her reactivation. Regardless of her slightly altered hardware, here she was. Alive, free to come and go as she wished from their compound. Which they should really settle on naming sometime soon. It was far too large now to be called a mere camp, and the Resistance wasn't much of a resistance as they were the sole intelligence still active on Earth. But for the time being it was just their home. A gradually growing expanse of metal and stone as sturdy utilitarian buildings were constructed in the ruins of one of humanity's once great cities. Nothing like the sterile perfection of the Bunker. But it was theirs at least. White cocked her head slightly to the side as a message came in through the short range network they now had operating. We're having issues with some of the older satellites. Would you still have the codes for them? Standing up she sent a confirmation and left her room. Stepping out into the open air. The night illuminated by rows of glowing electric lights surrounded by insects attracted to the illumination. A painful sense of familiarity came to her for the briefest moments. Some fleeting mix of emotion and memory that did not feel entirely natural. While she didn't have the same anger concerning the secret betrayal of the YoRHa she did share the desire to question those who had started their program. Who had thought it was a good idea to imprint memory data from replicants? Assuming that they hadn't somehow came to possess actual human memories for that purpose. It seemed profane to dishonor their creator’s memories thus. And all in pursuit of objectives she scarcely understood even after being an ignorant participant for centuries. Though most of the rest were far more concerned with the destruction of androids through repeated cycles of refinement caused by the war. That all those deaths had been in service of a lie and to win a battle they had been designed to lose only made the loss more painful. Why then did it not seem to matter as it should? It was clear that the knowledge of humanity's ultimate fate had already been discovered by some other androids which no longer hid their discovery from their fellows. That that revelation had not precipitated panic, disorder, mass chaos, or attempted self-termination by all units exposed to it... Well it left her feeling rather conflicted. Everyone just seemed to accept it and move on. Building a real stable settlement not suited for combat or defense. Others making their distracting hobbies and other interests their new primary focus. She'd seen one offering dance lessons of all things. Part of her just wanted to demand how they could act like this? How could they forget that humanity was gone? That they had failed time and time again to serve their creators? That they hadn't even truly won the war. Not that that had ever been the intention, but it was still grating that everyone seemed to put the past behind them so quickly. Quicker then she could. Perhaps the issue was that her role was no longer necessary. She could no longer command anything. The androids on Earth had long ago created their own personal hierarchies, and while they were officially subordinate to YoRHa there had never been a means of enforcing compliance other than sending an execution unit. And the only one of those nearby to begin with had barely said a word to her in the months since her reactivation. Even as she approached the effective community leader Anemone, 2B had only glanced at her and quickly moved away to one side so as to avoid having to directly speak to her previous commander. Standing by a pair of reactivated operators working to set up the ground based communications and control center. Anemone at least didn't seem to treat her differently than anyone else. "White, I'm glad you came so quickly." "It was no problem. I can only hope that might be able to help." "So do I. We've been trying to get a better satellite network functioning after so many got attacked a few months ago. And 9S mentioned that there were older satellites that had been shunted off but never recovered." "Yes, the earlier ones have likely de-orbited and burned up by now but if they're less than a century or two old we could bring them back online." "That's what I wanted to hear. Having to rely on scouts and aerial spotters has been limiting our efforts. Plus we have lousy communication ranges for the moment too. If you can fix that it would be a great help." "With the proper codes it should be a simple matter." Whitewalked over to the nearest computer terminal and began entering her administrator codes. "I'm surprised you asked me to help though. The systems shouldn't be that strongly encrypted." "Better safe than sorry. I wouldn't want us to have the system lock us out and force us to physically fly up there to fix or replace them if we don't need to." "Yes we don't have many vehicles capable of that anymore,” White said. Focusing more intently on her task as she tried not to think about how she might have died when the Bunker had suddenly opened itself up to enemy infiltration. "For the moment Ma'am. But I've been re-purposing one of the abandoned machine factories to make component parts for more." 9S had come up beside her. He had made more of an effort to put her at ease since her reactivation. Though she couldn't imagine why. How many times had she ordered his death and memory wipe? "That's... good. That's a good idea 9S." "I thought so too. I mean if the machines could use it to construct complicated machinery we should be able to as well." She nodded in response, her attention centered on the problem before her. Her first code had proven incorrect, likely not old enough. And the next had also been wrong, probably removed by a minor security upgrade that she didn't remember. It was considerably harder to do this when she couldn't check against the Bunker's own network. On Earth however there was very little of the constant electric buzz of wireless systems awaiting a response. More than there had been even a few weeks ago, but still a shockingly small number. The public network for the compound and a few others that had been set up for less important uses. Including one that seemed store and to distribute pictures of birds and little else. Some were even password locked and kept private. A gross volition of protocol if Anemone didn't secretly have access. Which she very well might not. Things were so different now. "There. That one was accepted." "Oh! We're getting something," one of the operator units said. Anemone gave White a pat on the shoulder as she stood back up, "Thanks for helping us with that. Now we can hopefully find out how other groups are doing without having to send a messenger to-" "Ah... Commander-Anemone I mean... there's something weird now." Soon the operator was even more flustered, as everyone's attention was focused on her. She turned back to her console and fiddled with the controls. "I mean it's probably nothing... since it really should be nothing now, right? But I'm detecting something and-" "And what? What did you find?" "Well I wasn't sure at first until the second satellite also detected it but... there's something out there." The silence that followed seemed far, far longer than the actual 1.3 seconds. "What do you mean by something?" "It's big... about one hundred and eighty meters long. It's giving off a large amount of thermal radiation and is currently one hundred and fifty thousand kilometers above the Earth's surface." White found herself standing shoulder to shoulder with 2B by necessity as they crowded near the monitor. Using VR imaging would have been preferable but the image they were getting wasn't networked into that system yet. Forcing them all to gaze at the grainy image on the screen as the operator tried to resolve it into something clearer. "That's not one of ours." "I... I don't think we've ever seen a ship like that," 9S said. It was long and narrow, with a soft rounded surface that lacked both the simplicity that machine life tended towards and the angular designs that humanity and androids used. Towards the rear of the vessel where the majority of the heat signature could be seen there were numerous more clearly metallic protrusions about what could only be a colossal engine system. The surface was discolored and pitted in places. Possibly decorative but looking closer to physical damage to the surface structure of the ship. "Is it a machine lifeform?" "... No. There's no sign of their native network signal from it all. If it's one of theirs it's completely dormant." Conversation began to break out among the androids nearby. Though White noticed that 2B had glanced towards Anemone and they had opened a private channel. She swallowed her anger that they would hide their communications from her. Quickly reminding herself that Anemone was the trusted leader here. And that 2B, along with the other surviving YoRHa units were seen as heroes for both freeing the android populace from the threat of the machines and spreading the truth of humanity's fate. She was in no position to demand that they do as she desired. "Oh no..." the operator said, gasping in horror at what she was seeing. "What's happening now?" "It-it's entering the atmosphere. I think it's going to land!" *** "Are you sure about this 2B? We could wait for A2 to come back... or try and reach her again at least. Even if she’s had another unexpected delay she should still be back by tomorrow." "There's no time 9S. The unidentified vessel is going to land in less than an hour," 2B said. Checking over her flight unit as she prepared to leave. "Besides she's in the opposite direction of the estimated landing zone. Someone needs to get there as quickly as possible." "This could be dangerous." "I know. But it's only recon. I don’t intend to engage an unknown alien force on my own." "Then I should go. I'm the Scanner after all." "How's your arm?" 2B asked, turning towards 9S. An unnecessary gesture now that her VR mask was on. "It's... fine. I'm fine." "You're lying. The parts for S units are harder to come by. And the lack of communications between outposts has kept us from getting the necessary materials to fabricate our own replacements." "Even then I should-" "9S. Nines," 2B said. Stepping forward to reassure 9S, half embracing him while hesitating as she noted the uneven damage he had yet to have repaired. "I'll be fine. I have your pod to replace mine for the moment." "We should really go about getting another one of those." "There hasn't really been time to worry about that. And most of the time when we've left the compound it's been in groups of two. It's just bad luck that this happened while A2 was away." "Still..." 9S began to say, clearly trying to find an argument that could be used. Without success. "Good luck 2B. Just stay safe out there." "I intend to." The flight unit rose up into the air, transitioning from bipedal landing mode to long distance flight from and rocketed away. Vanishing over the tops of the ruined skyscrapers as she headed towards the probable landing locations. While 9S quickly headed back towards their now quite active command center. Even if he couldn't join 2B in the field he would at least try and provide support from here. *** "I'm approaching the landing zone now. No signs of the unknown entities yet." "We can't pin down their landing site to a greater level of detail then we already have at the moment. But you should be within a two kilometers,” 9S said over her radio. "Affirmative." 2B continued to fly above the trees of this mountainous forest, skimming not far from the tops. Remaining low and hopefully obscured in case the vessel had some anti-air capability it might reveal at an inopportune moment. Though once she found the ship itself she fully intended to approach on foot. She could at least hope to remain hidden for long enough to identify what had landed. Her flight unit was completely incapable of achieving the same result. "I have visual confirmation of the landing site," 2B said. Magnifying the image and relaying it back through pod 153. The alien ship had landed half a kilometer away on a lightly forested hill. Several trees had broken off from a collision while previously hidden stabilizing legs had extended from the base. It had landed standing up, a great brownish black column. Smoke rose from fires likely started by the enormous heat the ship had been exuding and was only now finally losing in the cold night air. She could also see that the earlier damages were far more severe. Thick armor had been broken off in places and some portions of the ship would have to be exposed to vacuum from the resulting damage. "Well we can definitely say that they didn't get here without a scratch," 9S said over the communication channel as he received her visual data. "I'm landing now for a closer approach." Disembarking from her flight unit, 2B quickly made her way towards the ship. Taking greater and greater precautions as she drew ever closer to the landing site. Eventually darting from one tree to the next to remain out of sight with only her borrowed pod as company hovering close by. Till at last she came near the edge of the trees close to the landing site. The spacecraft looming above her while the fires started slowly burned themselves out among dry grass that had not yet recovered from their long summer. "I... I have visual," "Visual on wh-oh." 2B adjusted her view and magnified the image. Centering on the enormous vaguely insect like creature that had scuttled out of an opening in the ship and climbed to the ground. Mottled brown carapace and four large legs combined with its slightly curved body to give it an appearance somewhere between a shrimp and crab. With another pair of manipulating arms and long whip like tendrils from its back it left her feeling uneasy with the way it moved. Soon it started walking around the ship in a spiral pattern, slowly covering the ground and inspecting it with its antenna. "Could it be one of the aliens?" 2B asked. "The ones that caused the first invasion?" "No. I don't think so. The ships design is too different and there still doesn't appear to be any sign of machine lifeforms." "Maybe they stopped using them after-wait, something's happening." There appeared to be a great deal of activity suddenly. More and more of the aliens were pouring out of the ship. Dozens and dozens till at least a hundred were spread out in the field chittering loudly Or so it had appeared. "Did I count wrong?" 2B thought to herself. Communicating with her pod to get a check on the number of unknown entities. Which only confirmed that some of the ones that had come out of the ship had already vanished. "This isn't good. I need to pull back until we have more information." "2B! We're losing----. They know you're-" 9S’ voice caught off as a static filled the channel until she completely lost all communication ability. She needed to leave now. Her retreat was far quicker, forgoing stealth for speed. Only for her passage to be cut off by others that had somehow sneaked up behind her. And were even now emerging from tunnels in the earth. "They can burrow underground?" *Re-configuring to detect seismic micro-tremors. Warning. Imminent threat.* Responding to the pod's alarm, 2B rolled to one side as she felt the ground under her feet erupt outwards into a thrashing alien monster. Though that was hardly the only one to be charging towards her now. It seemed like every alien in the ship intended chase her down as a swarm. *Hostiles surrounding extraction point. Attempting to corral into close combat engagement. Advise use of long range weaponry.* "I know," 2B said. Still... maybe there was another way? "I don't want to fight you. If you'll ju-" She ducked to one side and rolled away from an ejection of fluid from one of the aliens. Smoke rose from where it impacted and began to burn through the bark of the tree beside her. "That was pointless. Of course we wouldn't share a common language." Another stream of acid narrowly missed her while her pod continued to warn of even more tunneling underneath. "Save for the universal tongue combat."
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lorajackson · 4 years
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Think a 'mild' case of Covid-19 doesn’t sound so bad? Think again
Otherwise healthy people who thought they recovered from coronavirus are reporting persistent and strange symptoms – including strokes Conventional wisdom suggests that when a sickness is mild, it’s not too much to worry about. But if you’re taking comfort in World Health Organization reports that over 80% of global Covid-19 cases are mild or asymptomatic, think again. As virologists race to understand the biomechanics of Sars-CoV-2, one thing is becoming increasingly clear: even “mild” cases can be more complicated, dangerous and harder to shake than many first thought.Throughout the pandemic, a notion has persevered that people who have “mild” cases of Covid-19 and do not require an ICU stay or the use of a ventilator are spared from serious health repercussions. Just last week, Mike Pence, the US vice-president, claimed it’s “a good thing” that nearly half of the new Covid-19 cases surging in 16 states are young Americans, who are at less risk of becoming severely ill than their older counterparts. This kind of rhetoric would lead you to believe that the ordeal of “mildly infected” patients ends within two weeks of becoming ill, at which point they recover and everything goes back to normal.While that may be the case for some people who get Covid-19, emerging medical research as well as anecdotal evidence from recovery support groups suggest that many survivors of “mild” Covid-19 are not so lucky. They experience lasting side-effects, and doctors are still trying to understand the ramifications.Some of these side effects can be fatal. According to Dr Christopher Kellner, a professor of neurosurgery at Mount Sinai hospital in New York, “mild” cases of Covid-19 in which the patient was not hospitalized for the virus have been linked to blood clotting and severe strokes in people as young as 30. In May, Keller told Healthline that Mount Sinai had implemented a plan to give anticoagulant drugs to people with Covid-19 to prevent the strokes they were seeing in “younger patients with no or mild symptoms”.Doctors now know that Covid-19 not only affects the lungs and blood, but kidneys, liver and brain – the latter potentially resulting in chronic fatigue and depression, among other symptoms. Although the virus is not yet old enough for long-term effects on those organs to be well understood, they may manifest regardless of whether a patient ever required hospitalization, hindering their recovery process.Another troubling phenomenon now coming into focus is that of “long-haul” Covid-19 sufferers – people whose experience of the illness has lasted months. For a Dutch report published earlier this month (an excerpt is translated here) researchers surveyed 1,622 Covid-19 patients with an average age of 53, who reported a number of enduring symptoms, including intense fatigue (88%) persistent shortness of breath (75%) and chest pressure (45%). Ninety-one per cent of the patients weren’t hospitalized, suggesting they suffered these side-effects despite their cases of Covid-19 qualifying as “mild”. While 85% of the surveyed patients considered themselves generally healthy before having Covid-19, only 6% still did so one month or more after getting the virus.After being diagnosed with Covid-19, 26-year-old Fiona Lowenstein experienced a long, difficult and nonlinear recovery first-hand. Lowenstein became sick on 17 March, and was briefly hospitalized for fever, cough and shortness of breath. Doctors advised she return to the hospital if those symptoms worsened – but something else happened instead. “I experienced this whole slew of new symptoms: sinus pain, sore throat, really severe gastrointestinal issues,” she told me. “I was having diarrhea every time I ate. I lost a lot of weight, which made me weak, a lot of fatigue, headaches, loss of sense of smell …”By the time she felt mostly better, it was mid-May, although some of her symptoms still routinely re-emerge, she says.“It’s almost like a blow to your ego to be in your 20s and healthy and active, and get hit with this thing and think you’re going to get better and you’re going to be OK. And then have it really not pan out that way,” says Lowenstein.Unable to find information about what she was experiencing, and wondering if more people were going through a similarly prolonged recovery, Lowenstein created The Body Politic Slack-channel support group, a forum that now counts more than 5,600 members – most of whom were not hospitalized for their illness, yet have been feeling sick for months after their initial flu-like respiratory symptoms subsided. According to an internal survey within the group, members – the vast majority of whom are under 50 – have experienced symptoms including facial paralysis, seizures, hearing and vision loss, headaches, memory loss, diarrhea, serious weight loss and more.“To me, and I think most people, the definition of ‘mild’, passed down from the WHO and other authorities, meant any case that didn’t require hospitalization at all, that anyone who wasn’t hospitalized was just going to have a small cold and could take care of it at home,” Hannah Davis, the author of a patient-led survey of Body Politic members, told me. “From my point of view, this has been a really harmful narrative and absolutely has misinformed the public. It both prohibits people from taking relevant information into account when deciding their personal risk levels, and it prevents the long-haulers from getting the help they need.”At this stage, when medical professionals and the public alike are learning about Covid-19 as the pandemic unfolds, it’s important to keep in mind how little we truly know about this vastly complicated disease – and to listen to the experiences of survivors, especially those whose recoveries have been neither quick nor straightforward.It may be reassuring to describe the majority of Covid-19 cases as “mild” – but perhaps that term isn’t as accurate as we hoped. * Adrienne Matei is a freelance journalist
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