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redphlox · 2 years

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The Wrong Way to Put out a Fire

Not sure why a common take after chapters 301-302 is that the Todoroki family has yet to understand or see Touya. If anything, the chapters establish the opposite. Rei came to Endeavor’s hospital room to discuss their family, aka their parenting failures. The flashbacks were ugly and hard to stomach because that’s what abuse and dysfunctional families look like. That was the purpose of chapters 300-302: to paint how the family spiraled the more ambitious and violent Endeavor became. The flashbacks showed how each Todoroki family member unintentionally made Touya feel unloved, unseen, and unimportant. Or, more like, how Touya interpreted these instances. Everyone felt alone, scared, and trapped, but Touya spiraled loudly while everyone else suffered quietly. After rehashing their past, the family then collectively had a discussion about how they felt like they failed or could have done better. Whether this was misplaced (the children) or true (the parents), everyone saw not only Touya and his pain but each other’s as well.

TLDR:

The family sees and understands Touya, which is a good sign for his endgame because that’s all he ever wanted.

It was Endeavor, not the children, who scapegoated Touya in the past.

The family loves each other unconditionally, though they weren't able to show it because of the abusive home environment.

Rei always saw Touya’s pain but wasn't able to help because she was a victim too, and it wasn’t her attention that Touya wanted.

Natsuo and Fuyumi feel guilty for not being able to help the family, even though it wasn't their fault or responsibility.

Rei wasn't calling Shouto the 'good' child and Touya the 'bad' child when she called Shouto the ‘family's hero’. She was stating that Shouto has carried a lot of burdens trying to help himself and the family heal, but now it's time for the parents to rightfully take over that responsibility. That’s why she talked Shouto out of going to confront Dabi by himself.

The Todoroki family backstory chapters are called "The Wrong Way to Put out a Fire" because Endeavor sparked that fire in Touya to surpass All Might, but he chose the wrong way to convince Touya to stop training after Touya’s quirk started hurting him. The correct way would have been to let go of living vicariously through an heir, to have set an example by setting aside his ambition and focusing on his family. Instead, he decided to double down and ended up hurting his family.

The framing is unclear, but the family most likely wants Touya back. If they had planned or wished otherwise, Shouto wouldn’t have made comments about wanting to get to know Touya over dinner.

Read below the cut for an in-depth analysis:

For Natsuo and Fuyumi, the moments where they “rejected” Touya were small and innocent. Fuyumi was genuinely worried about her big brother’s owies. But when she said this, Touya immediately stomped off crying because he felt invalidated, probably expecting his sister to say, “you can do it!” instead of “don’t train anymore.” What she said sounded all too similar to what Endeavor told him, and it was upsetting to hear because Endeavor rejected him instead of continuing to bond with his son. In the present, Fuyumi goes on to lament that she tried to keep up appearances, but that that didn��t help at all; the family was broken despite all the attempts she made to bandage the situation superficially. This is her way of expressing regret and helplessness in a situation that she didn’t create but wanted so badly to fix because she wants a real family. I don’t think any of this means she’s looking back and saying Touya was at fault for their family’s problems. If anything, this leans more toward, “Touya was suffering, and I tried to ignore the family’s problems because I didn’t know what else to do.”

In the flashbacks, Natsuo was tired and too sleepy to understand his older brother. Yes, he was able to understand Touya because he was also a neglected and failed son, but he had the unique position of being the family’s baby for a while before Shouto was born. He was given extra care and love by not only Rei but also Fuyumi. Unlike Touya, Natsuo never had Endeavor’s approval taken away from him, so in his eyes, he could survive the rejection because he found approval and love elsewhere. He states so in the fifth light novel. Now, it’s not that simple because Natsuo is still reeling from this rejection as an adult, but my point is that Natsuo had support while Touya didn’t. After he was saved from Ending, Natsuo basically tells Endeavor that Touya was right about him and how he treated the family. He starts crying because Endeavor trying to change seems all too late and Touya isn’t around and Natsuo can’t help but feel guilty for not listening to Touya. He probably thinks about that night he “rejected” Touya a lot, even if it was absolutely not his fault. Natsuo harbors a lot of guilt about not being able to help Touya or fix the family, which is noble of him but also wasn’t his responsibility because he was a child. In 302, Natsuo lamenting that he didn’t force Endeavor to talk to Touya and stating that Endeavor is the root cause of the family’s issues comes off as more casting blame on Endeavor than on Touya. As in, Natsuo isn’t scapegoating Touya. If anything, he’s been staunchly advocating for not only Touya but for Shouto and Rei as well.

Now, before I go on to talk about the parents, I think we have to be careful not to conflate unconditional love and actions. Touya didn’t feel unconditionally loved because the environment Endeavor created didn’t allow the family to express their feelings and connect in a healthy manner. For example, in the fifth light novel, Natsuo reflects that Rei poured all her time and energy into protecting Shouto from Endeavor - so much so that Natsuo was jealous of Shouto and felt like he stole their mother. Not spending enough time with Natsuo wasn't something that Rei did because she didn't love him, though. It was a response to Endeavor's abuse. This same logic - the absence of quality time, or being seen - can be applied to Touya, too. There’s nothing in the text that suggests Rei or the siblings loved Touya any less because his quirk hurt his body, or because he didn't follow Endeavor’s orders to stop training. They worried about him and told him to stop, which he interpreted as not believing in him and thus not loving him, which is understandable because of his trauma. He interpreted his father's rejection as a lack of love and acceptance, which he started associating with all rejection, even from his younger siblings. I wrote about this more in-depth [here].

Even though Natsuo and Fuyumi didn't understand Touya, they still loved him, as demonstrated when they went out of their way to invite him to play ball. They wanted to spend time with him. And though Rei’s actions (not stopping the abuse because she was also an abuse victim herself) don’t scream unconditional love, it was there. This unconditional love was unexpressed because of the toxic environment: Rei’s mental health was deteriorating because of the physical abuse she was experiencing. So, it’s valid that Touya didn’t feel unconditionally loved even though it was there - the Todoroki household was an oppressive environment. This didn’t only affect Touya, but also Fuyumi, Natsuo, and Shouto as well, because they carried a lot of misplaced guilt about the family circumstances and what happened to their mother.

So, Rei does love Touya – she loves all of her children – but she didn’t know how to help him and thus considers herself as having a hand in hurting Touya. Yes, she was a victim of abuse too, but she still had the responsibility of keeping her children safe and couldn’t do so because of the effects of the abuse. This is probably why Touya’s death was the last straw for her mental health, which I wrote about [here]. She’s not as responsible as Endeavor because he was the instigator, but she acknowledges that she failed as a mother by not doing more, which is why she thinks Shouto is doing her a favor for calling her ‘mother’ again and wanting to rebuild their relationship. She knows he doesn’t have to, and yet he wants to and she’s grateful to be given a second chance because she doesn’t think she deserves one.

Speaking of Rei - chapters 301-302 established that she DOES see how and why Touya was suffering. In fact, she knew the whole time, as noted when she tells Endeavor after Touya tried to attack baby Shouto that all Touya wants is for his father to pay attention to him. She also shows understanding during that talk she tried to have with Touya when she caught him heading out to Sekoto Peak. The talk didn’t help because Touya thought it was hypocritical - she didn’t have a choice in what was expected of her from her parents, so why is she saying he has a choice? He doesn’t, because, like her, he had familial expectations to fulfill. He was born for a reason, and for her to stand there and tell him to look elsewhere was tone-deaf to him. In his opinion, she was doing to him what her parents did to her: pretending like he had a choice or agency over his future, when in reality he didn’t.

So, Rei knew and saw Touya’s problems and understood what he wanted and needed, but she couldn’t do anything because the correct way to have put out that fire in Touya would have been for Endeavor to stop pursuing the #1 spot, which he refused to do. This is why the chapters are titled “The Wrong Way to Put out a Fire”. He threw himself into his career instead of focusing on his family, which is repeatedly condemned by the narrative (see: Nana and Koutaro). The correct way to put out that fire in Touya would have been for Endeavor to let go of his own personal mission to surpass All Might vicariously through his children and instead engage in life outside of being a hero, too. While it was good he stopped training Touya, he still chose to have more kids not so he could raise them with love, but as tools. This made Touya feel like he was being replaced, and on top of that, was blamed for how he reacted to rejection. Even the way that Endeavor says Touya "shows up" with more burns places the caregiving responsibility away from the parents and onto the child. This is scapegoating - blaming Touya for valuing training when Endeavor instilled that in him - and it’s also passive parenting. Even though Enji cared for his son, he didn't know how to show Touya this because he put his own needs first. I talked about this in detail [here].

Horikoshi chooses to repeat certain phrases to add emphasis and highlight important themes in the story. With the Todoroki family, one of these is fire and raising the heat up [I wrote a meta here]. During the Joint Training Arc, Shouto goes overboard with his fire quirk to the point it hurts him. The same thing happened with Touya when he burned to death. This motif of “fire” and putting it out is a reference to Endeavor’s ambition and plan to surpass All Might. How was Touya supposed to let go of training and making strong flames when that was all Endeavor focused on, too? Touya was around that obsession all the time and he learned that his father values strong quirks, so to him it made sense to continue training to strengthen his quirk to gain his father’s approval. It’s like a young child around their parents’ and society’s constant dieting - the child will likely experience higher rates of body dissatisfaction and disordered eating. Parents create the environments their children live in, and children watch and learn even when parents aren’t purposely trying to teach them. It’s called mirroring. That’s why children freak out when their parents freak out, yell when parents yell, why children bully when they experience violence at home, etc. Young Hawks watched his parents and told himself NOT to be like them. Touya watched his father and learned TO BE just like him on top of being told at an impressionable age by his father that he was born to surpass All Might. How was Touya supposed to let go of that while his father ignored Natsuo for not having the ideal quirk? When Endeavor was maniacally overjoyed to finally have a son with the perfect quirk and kept telling said son that Touya was ALMOST perfect, and that his brothers were failures?

That being said, chapters 301-302 serve to place the responsibility on Endeavor’s shoulders. They don’t paint Touya as being the scapegoat in the present. The biggest indicator of this is that Rei went to confront Endeavor at the hospital to make him do something to help their son. Endeavor was in the midst of giving up (“Endeavor died out there… all these regrets… It’s too late”), which would just be doing what he always did – running away. This was a callback to him placing Touya in Rei’s care instead of facing him himself. After all, it was Endeavor’s attention and validation Touya craved. Endeavor claimed he couldn't do anything for Touya because he was a hero and thus in a different world, but Rei called him out for running away. He was a hero who couldn't save his son's smile, which is what heroes are supposed to do. And this hits all too poignantly when Touya burns to death ten years later on the same hill where Endeavor used to train. This is another reference to the fire motif Horikoshi uses to denote that Endeavor’s ambition to be #1 wasn’t a good thing.

Now to address the contested “Shouto is our family’s hero” statement that Rei made in 302. I don’t think Rei called Shouto the hero of the family in a family systems “he’s the family’s goldenboy, and Touya is the blacksheep” way, but in a “Shouto’s been healing, and it gave me the strength to heal too” type of way. As in, he took the initiative to take steps toward recovery. He’s been the one brave and strong enough to do something about the mess of their family, and she’s not saying that to praise Shouto but to scold herself and Endeavor because that should have been the parents’ role. “Shouto is our family’s hero” means “Shouto has been doing all the work to heal this family and we can’t have that anymore. So step up.” This falls in line with Shouto saying “I thought you couldn’t do it anymore…” because he was right, Endeavor was giving up right until Rei gave him no other choice but to keep going and until Hawks and Jeanist proposed a team-up. Rei talked Shouto out of fighting Dabi solo, so I’m not sure how Rei’s comment has been seen as her making Shouto be the family’s hero, or the ‘good’ kid. I don’t think Rei meant “hurt Touya'' when she told Endeavor to fight him. If the narrative has established that Dabi is the manifestation of all Endeavor’s abuse and negative traits, then he has to fight, aka face, Dabi in order to get through to Touya.

Anyway, the flashbacks explained how and why the Todoroki family was dysfunctional, starting with Endeavor’s plan to marry in order to create a perfect hybrid offspring and ending with the breaking point: Touya’s death. Rei escalated after this and has been institutionalized ever since. Endeavor dug in his heels and continued to train Shouto for his own personal gain and live vicariously through him. He admits so in 203: “I ignored your will and your feelings…” Shouto has been isolated and angry at his father for abusing his mother, Natsuo has been angry at his father for causing Touya’s death, abusing his mother, abusing Shouto, and neglecting him and Fuyumi, and Fuyumi has been trying to fake being a happy family and keeping the peace, which didn't foster an environment for anyone to talk about feelings. None of that has helped anyone individually, nor has it helped move the family forward.

But, what has helped is Shouto remembering his mother’s words and separating himself from his father’s shadow. Reconnecting with his mother has done wonders for Shouto because he obviously missed her and resented Endeavor for removing her from his life. Shouto realized that spiting his father accomplished nothing. It was limiting, stunting, and isolating him, so he decided to start making friends and letting others in his life. This has helped him understand how healthy relationships work, which is what Rei means when she says he went to UA and made friends. He looked away from their dysfunctional family and made connections with people despite his heart being broken so many times at home. That’s admirable. But ultimately, fixing the family isn’t his responsibility - it’s hers and Endeavor’s, and since she isn’t combat trained, she tells Endeavor he can’t give up even if it seems hopeless right now. He can’t. Their son Touya is out there and has to be stopped. Endeavor is the one who Touya wanted approval from anyway, the one who Touya wanted to be noticed by because Endeavor was the one who rejected him.

I’m not sure how any of this is painting Touya currently as the scapegoat. Chapters 301-302 showed us how Touya was a scapegoat for Endeavor in the past. He blames Touya’s pigheaded bullishness on everything but his own influence and example. Endeavor became so fixated on surpassing All Might - becoming stronger - that Touya couldn't let go of the idea that hotter flames = stronger and therefore more worthy. Endeavor chose to have more kids in his refusal to let go of his selfish ambitions to become #1. However, currently, the family seems to be holding Endeavor accountable, and he is holding himself accountable too… or, trying to, through atonement. No doubt facing his eldest son is difficult for him. He didn’t know what to say to Touya back then, and he probably doesn't know what to say to him now. But, it’s clear that the family isn’t using Touya to scapegoat their family issues. If they were, Shouto wouldn’t have said that he would like to get to know Touya. Natsuo wouldn’t have said he wished he could have made Endeavor talk to Touya in hopes that their lives would have been different and he could have had a relationship with Shouto. Fuyumi wouldn’t have said that she tried to pretend the family wasn’t broken. Rei wouldn’t have faced her abuser for the first time in ten years and told him that he’s not allowed to give up, and she wouldn’t have told him “but you didn’t show up” when they were recounting how Touya died at Sekoto Peak. This sounds like regret, guilt, and acknowledging the source of the abuse and chaos within a household’s past. It’s not painting Touya as a scapegoat, or the ‘bad’ child.

The framing is messy and unclear, and I think that’s the issue - it’s not clear what the family wants with Touya because Horikoshi probably wants to build suspense or whatever. But they’re not saying, “This is all Touya’s fault and we were doing great until he revealed himself.” They didn’t say, “If Touya had just stopped causing problems, we would have been a happy family.” Nor are they saying anything close to this sentiment. If Shouto’s statement about wanting to have dinner with his brother is any indication to go by, the family wants him back, too.

#bnha #bnha meta #todoroki #shouto todoroki #touya todoroki #dabi #keeping up with the todorokis #bnha 302 #bnha spoilers #rei todoroki #fuyumi todoroki #natsuo todoroki #my endeavor meta #my meta #bnha 301 #the wrong way to put out a fire

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tommybaholland · 2 years

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hi! so i saw your comfort w/ self harm haikyuu, and tokyo revengers post, so i was wondering if you could make a version for bnha? (if it’s not too much, there’s no pressure and rush)

you can add more characters in it if you want, but as long as shoto and shinsou’s in it. thank you!

comforting their s/o over self-harm [pt.3]

featuring: todoroki, shinso and dabi

thank you for reading the haikyuu and tokyorev versions of this idea. once again, there’s a resource available on the haikyuu post if you or a loved one are in need of help. there are mentions of blood, proceed with caution! also thought i’d combine this with the above request since they both include shinso. hope you enjoy<3

todoroki doesn’t have the best track record of being a consoling individual. he’s dense and often comes off blunt when pointing out others flaws or missteps. he has his own share of traumatic experiences and still lives with the aftereffects every day. he never wants to burden anyone, including you with those problems, which is what worried him the most when getting romantically involved with you. however, it seems the main problem is you adopting that trait of bottling up emotion and never letting it see the light of day, leaving an empty shell of you. yet you still have the scars that remind you of your weakness, making you find comfort in collecting more. he’s devastated knowing you’ve suffered again and again, drowning in your own sense of hopelessness. you need him now more than ever. all throughout his hero training, he’s become increasingly better at first aid treatment, combined with his quirk, covering those painful reminders is the least he can do. he guides you to bed, wanting you to rest but also makes you some tea to sip on for comfort. he sits with you until you fall asleep, whispering promises to warm your tea back up again when you wake.

shinso used to believe that you can’t have sympathy for everyone because then you’d run out of sympathy to give. he used to apply a similar thinking to the way of hero work in that you can’t save everyone, especially with his quirk. it helped him to not feel the pressure of being an amazing hero but doing enough to feel fulfilled within his role. however, relationships aren’t part of being a hero. at least, not in the same sense. he realized that it takes a different kind of hero within those situations. he didn’t think he’d be the right fit to help you, feeling useless to you for a while. even so, this is not about him. it’s about you and he really, really cares about you, despite that he may not be extremely forthcoming about it all the time. he’s not the greatest with words yet he chooses to reassure you, his eyes filled with tears like your own, “you’re so important to me, i never want to lose you. so please, whatever it is that you need, i’ll get that or do that or whatever it may be. i want to be here to see you get better and i know you can. so please tell me what you need.”

dabi is definitely not the master of comforting people. he’s really the last person anyone would want around anyway so why would you be so careless as to let him see blood dripping from under your sleeve? now he get some type of feeling, some would call it concern, but whatever it is, he can’t have it lingering in his head. the day finally came in which he was able to get a better look at your arm, grabbing it and pulling up your sleeve. you yelped slightly in the process which was all the proof he needed to know what you had been doing. his troubled expression did not drop as yours turned frantic and scared as to what he might think. in reality, he’s the last person to cast judgment. it’s obvious that he has his own scars and whether purposefully inflicted or not, he knows it’s never enough to conceal the pain inside. he sighs, simply tugging you with a now more delicate hold on your upper arm, to the bathroom where he fumbles around for his personal kit that he uses for his own marred skin. he works quietly, doing his best with a wound that’s different from his own. once he’s finished, he leaves a long kiss to you forehead, “only one of us can have scars, you dummy. but i guess i’ll carry yours too.”

see ya later this week for more! don’t be afraid to feed the inbox...

#mha x reader #bnha x reader #shinso x reader #shinso fluff #shinso blurb #todoroki x reader #todoroki fluff #todoroki blurb #dabi x reader #dabi fluff #dabi blurb #request #requested #tommybaholland

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veenxys · 3 years

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hi!! i hope you’re having a great day!! i was curious how the bnha boyfies (( deku, bakugo, todoroki, kirishima, denki, sero, shinsou, tamaki, mirio, shindo, monoma, shiggy, dabi + hawks )) would react if their s/o who is selectively clingy w certain people kinda back off suddenly because they just feel.. embarrassed?? like when they were a kid people reacted negatively to their clinginess and would ignore them for it. and they just feel so dumb to show emotion & showing their clinginess? and they feel like they’re being a bother and being annoying too... & suddenly just feel like closing off from the world lol? & like they can just feel really out of place and get negative thoughts that they don’t belong there, X person or a group of ppl in the convo don’t wanna talk to them etc and feel like they don’t belong in the conversation if that makes sense (i get those thoughts especially when i’m in a group i feel like i get overlooked a lot lol and i’ve never really felt included + like i can just feel so overwhelmed sometimes about the amount pf people / crowds or feeling like i’m being judged bc i’m beating myself up mentally abt my insecurities and i just end up most likely having a panic attack and just like tearing up, either crying on the spot or trying to hold it in till i get home). i’ve been feeling like this recently and i’d love to see what they’d do if that’s possible please!! thank you so much!!

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a/n: english is not my first language, sorry if I have a mistake!

Hi my angel, sorry but I don't write to Monoma or Shindo :/ and I loved this request because I feel exactly like this, so I did my best to make you feel comfortable. <3

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⤷ Bakugou

You are the only person who can break Bakugou's shields and he is very grateful for that, but he also wanted to break your shields.

He knows about your insecurities and he identifies with you, so he tries to learn, so he can teach you.

He always starts with small gestures of affection, to show you that you can be comfortable with him because he will not hurt you, quite the contrary, he just wants to make you safe.

And he could spend hours just feeling your touch, he enjoys every second of it.

When you go somewhere with a lot of people, he always stands by your side holding your hand.

If he sees that you are tense or nervous, he will kiss your temple and pull you somewhere more isolated and will start talking about random things with you to try to make you forget your fear.

Whenever you start talking, all of his attention goes to you, it's like he's mesmerized every time you open your mouth.

Sometimes the two of you are talking as if you are in your own world, forgetting everything around you.

»»————-　★　————-««

⤷ Deku

Deku never misses an opportunity to show you affection, so he will always have a hand on you, stroking your hair, or holding your hand.

He does everything possible and impossible to make you feel comfortable with him, and if you don't, he doesn't give up trying. Because he wants to help you and he wants to show you how much he loves you.

If you are with a lot of people, he always praises you in front of everyone.

"Y / n is the best hero I have ever seen, they are amazing!"

When you start to say something, he just looks at you with shining eyes and a smile on his face, silently saying that all of his attention is on you.

He always has an arm around you, showing you that you are safe with him.

If you are not feeling well, he will understand and will quickly go somewhere calmer with you.

He caresses your face with affection while you say everything you want.

Deku will do anything to make you feel good and safe in his arms.

»»————-　★　————-««

⤷ Kirishima

Kirishima is always the first to show affection, because he wants to show you that he loves you and that you are safe with him.

He knows about your insecurity and your problems, and he is more than ready to help you with that.

If you start showing affection for him and just stop, he'll be sad and have a cute pout on his lips as he snuggles up to you like a child.

‘’ Please continue ’’ he whispers against your neck as he hugs you tight.

If you are somewhere with a lot of people, he will always be on your side, like always.

Just one look from you and he already knows what you need or how you are feeling.

He takes your hand carefully and takes you to a quieter place.

He hugs you and shows you random things from the street to distract you, he makes some silly jokes too.

You are his world, and he will do anything so that you can smile without fear.

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⤷ Todoroki

Todoroki is not much to show affection, but for you he tries.

He wants to show you that you are safe with him, that you are at home with him.

So it is through small gestures that he does this, but they are gestures so pure and unique that I cannot explain.

Anyway, Todoroki is very quiet so he will not say anything if you show affection to him, but he will complain if you stop.

When you are somewhere with a lot of people, he is always looking at you to see if everything is okay.

If not, he'll take you somewhere quiet so he can talk to you peacefully.

He caresses your face while talking to you, about anything you want.

He tries to distract you by saying silly things about his week.

And just seeing your smile makes Todoroki's day complete.

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⤷ Denki

Denki shows affection for you 24/7 after he finds out about your insecurity.

He always wants to know if you're feeling comfortable and well, it's literally all the time.

When you show affection for him, he goes crazy because he never wants you to stop, it's like a drug that he got addicted to.

And if you stop showing affection, this drama queen will cry a lot and will only stop when you show affection for him again.

Anyway, if you are somewhere with a lot of people, Denki always tries to distract you from your bad thoughts.

Honestly Denki is professional at making you laugh

But if you want to leave, he will understand perfectly and will go somewhere empty with you.

He kisses you, hugs you and says cute things to you

Like I said, he always wants to make you comfortable and safe because you are his world, and he will never let anything hurt you.

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⤷ Tamaki

It is very difficult for Tamaki to show affection, but for you he tries anything.

So it starts with small things that you fall in love with more every day.

When you show affection for him for the first time, he melts at your touch.

And through small gestures, he will ask you to continue.

Well, I guess you don't have to worry about going out to places with a lot of people because your boyfriend doesn't like to go out either.

But if you go out, you stay further away from people, isolating yourself in your own little world.

Tamaki always looks to you to make sure you are okay, and if you are sad he will be desperate and will do anything to make you feel good.

Then he will take you home and hug you and caress you as if you are the most precious thing in the world. (because you are, I don't make the rules)

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⤷ Shinsou

It would take a while for Shinsou to be able to open up to you, but when he does, he never stops.

He loves to kiss you and say cute things to you

And when he manages to make you comfortable with him, he feels the greatest happiness in his life.

He could spend the rest of his life just feeling your touch.

If you feel uncomfortable with a lot of people, he will talk to you about random things to distract you.

Or else he will take you home and take care of you like a baby.

So get ready to see the best side of Shinsou.

He will show all his love for you in every way possible, he is completely in love with you and that will never change.

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⤷ Mirio

Mirio is CEO in showing affection for you and making you laugh

Your feelings are his number one priority, so he does everything for you

He shows affection for you 24/7

And he almost cries when he can make you feel comfortable with him

If you are uncomfortable when you are with a lot of people, he will be very worried and will take you somewhere calmer.

He will hug you, tell you random and funny things to cheer you up.

And when you smile at him, he feels his heart melt in your chest, because your smile is the most beautiful thing he has ever seen in his life, and he will fight until the last second so that you never stop smiling.

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⤷ Hawks

Hawks are a needy baby so get ready because he will fill you with love.

You are his priority, so he will always ensure that you are well and comfortable

No matter how long it takes, he will do anything to make you feel safe with him.

And when that happens, he is so proud of you (and himself)

And he shows even more affection, so good luck

Anyway, when you go out, he always has a hand on you, whether it's around your shoulder, your waist or holding your hand.

When you feel uncomfortable, he stops everything he is doing and comes to you, wrapping his wings around you while he strokes your cheek.

He takes you home and lets you say whatever you want while he hugs you and caresses your body.

He wraps his wings around you again, making you feel safe in your own little world.

»»————-　★　————-««

⤷ Dabi

Dabi is not the kind of person who shows affection, but after he discovers your insecurity, he will do his best to make you feel loved by him.

He does not say, of course. He prefers to make small gestures that make your heart race

He will never admit it, but the greatest happiness of his life was when he managed to make you feel comfortable with him.

He loves your touch and he could spend eternity just feeling it.

You rarely go out, but when that happens, he always makes sure that you're okay.

He's always looking at you, and just one look from you and he already understands what's going on.

He caresses your cheek and kisses your lips before taking you home.

He hugs you and strokes your back.

He won't talk about what you're feeling because he doesn't want you to remember, so he'll talk about random things from his day, hoping that you feel better in his arms.

»»————-　★　————-««

⤷ Shigaraki

Shigaraki is like you, he wants so much to be able to show affection for you, but he is afraid.

But then he tries, with small gestures that you barely notice at first, but then it becomes something constant between you.

It takes a while for Shigaraki to feel comfortable with you, but when he does, he will be on your side 24/7

And trust me, he will do anything to make you feel comfortable and safe with him. Because you are his home, and he wants it to be yours too.

When you go somewhere with a lot of people, Shigaraki doesn't leave your side for even a second.

If you feel uncomfortable or something, he will go out with you in the same second, taking you somewhere calm and peaceful.

He hugs you, kisses your forehead and strokes your back.

Shigaraki would destroy the world to protect his home.

»»————-　★　————-««

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makeste · 3 years

Text

some follow-up thoughts on BnHA 306

mostly Deku angst, but also a little Baku angst (and some TodoBaku angst) mixed in for good measure. because there’s plenty of angst to go around.

1. “if I’d only been stronger...”

I’ll talk more about Deku later in this post as well, because there’s definitely plenty to talk about; this is the most character development he’s gotten in almost 200 chapters. but for starters, I want to discuss the possible parallels between Deku’s current character arc, and what is arguably the most iconic moment of angst/character development in the series.

remember how this kid, who up until this point had rarely seemed to give two fucks about the world around him, suddenly revealed that he blamed himself for being the downfall of All Might? remember how it came almost out of nowhere? how he’d been hiding it, and trying to suppress it? “but even if I try to forget... sometimes it all just comes rushing back.”

yeah. so anyway, I got to thinking -- if being the cause of one hero’s downfall could affect someone this badly, what about being responsible for the downfall of all heroes?

what if a boy who wanted nothing more than to keep people safe suddenly found himself at the epicenter of a disaster that killed hundreds, possibly even thousands of people?

now obviously, this is not the sole thing that’s troubling Deku right now; this kid has a whole array of traumas as of the War arc. like, you know it’s bad when Society As We Know It Coming To An End Partially Because Of You is the least of your problems. but still, I think this is worth bringing up, because the hero kids blaming themselves for things that aren’t their fault is hardly anything new. and yet, what with everything else that’s been going on -- all of the Todoroki drama, and Vestige revelations, and hospital antics, and political strife -- I feel like it’s easy to forget or overlook this little detail.

the fact is that AFO put this entire plan into motion solely in the hopes of finally obtaining OFA. every single thing that happened at Jakku -- Tomura powering up; Machia waking up and going on his rampage (after being ordered to do so by Tomura); and even Dabi/Touya choosing this moment to finally strike (because he knew this was when the reveal would do the maximum damage -- when people’s faith in heroes was already wavering) -- every last bit of it can ultimately be traced back to AFO’s desire to steal OFA. which, obviously, makes it AFO’s fault, not Deku’s. but then, Kamino wasn’t actually Katsuki’s fault either. it wasn’t his fault the villains went after him (but he blamed himself anyway), and it wasn’t his fault that people got hurt in the ensuing battle to save him (but he blamed himself anyway).

just. I think we’re underestimating just how strong of an impact all of this likely had on Deku. we haven’t really had the chance to see him process it yet. he’s been too busy, and there have been too many other things going on. but I’m telling you guys, that empty look in his eyes in the final page of the chapter? I can all but guarantee you that at least some of that emotional weight is coming from this.

sure would be nice if he had a friend who knew exactly what that was like, and could help him process the guilt and all of the other associated emotions, just like Deku once helped him. unfortunately I’m not so sure things will be that easy this time around. anyways though let’s move on to a couple of other thoughts and speculations.

2. “...and I bullied him.”

one of my least-favorite BnHA fanfic tropes is the one where the rest of class 1-A somehow finds out about Katsuki and Deku’s history -- i.e. that Katsuki bullied Deku throughout most of their childhood. mind you, it’s not the concept itself that I dislike; it’s mostly how it’s used. a lot of times it’s just an excuse to have all of the other kids turn on Katsuki and ostracize him; either because the author thinks that’s what he deserves, or else so that Deku can eventually come to his rescue and defend him and shame the rest of the class for not seeing how much he’s changed. either way, it’s usually pretty awkward to read, and more often than not the characters are pretty OOC (especially Ochako and Todoroki).

however! there’s a big difference between fanfic and canon, and just because I’m not a fan of this trope in the former doesn’t mean it couldn’t be executed well in the latter. and lately I’ve been thinking about this a lot. mainly for three reasons:

the recent (can we still call it recent?? well whatever) scene where Katsuki confessed to All Might that he used to bully Deku is now one of my favorite scenes in the entire series, and proof that this can be executed well.

both Todoroki and Deku have finally had their respective big secrets revealed to the rest of the class. so like, idk. feels like it just might be secret-revealing season now, you know?

and lastly, as a result of Deku’s secret about OFA finally being revealed, the rest of 1-A now either knows, or can extrapolate, that he used to be quirkless.

and from there, I feel like it’s not all that hard to put two and two together with how terrible Kacchan and Deku’s relationship was when they first started at UA. that’s not a terribly difficult puzzle to solve. so I feel like it might come out anyway, and if so, I’d prefer Bakugou telling them himself, and taking responsibility as part of his atonement process. because we know that he regrets it. we know their relationship has changed. we know that he has changed. and so I think I might like to see this.

alternately, if confessing to the entire class is too much, at the very least I could see him confessing to Shouto, because I’ve always felt like this was one of the big things that made Katsuki so resistant to letting Todoroki call him a friend. because I feel like there’s a part of Katsuki that saw the parallels between Endeavor’s abuse of Shouto and his own bullying of Deku, and thought, he wouldn’t be so quick to call me his friend if he actually knew the truth. and so there’s actually been this roadblock wedged between them this whole time that Shouto doesn’t even know about. because Shouto hates Endeavor. and so it’s not such a leap to assume he’d hate Katsuki too if he knew just how terrible he’d been to Deku when they were younger.

not that I think he actually would! actually I don’t think either of those things is actually true (because Shouto clearly doesn’t hate his father either, in spite of everything that’s happened). but the point isn’t what I think -- the point is what Katsuki thinks. and I really do think there’s a good chance he’s worried about Shouto hating him, and it’s one of the things that’s made him so reluctant to accept his friendship. anyway, so I’m really just rambling now, but you get my point. I don’t know if this is actually going to happen, but it’s a scene I would like to see if Horikoshi decides to indulge me.

3. “...so when you wake up, please give him my best.”

and now, as promised, back to Deku.

ngl guys, when I first saw this image, my immediate thought was that Gran must have died. because I mean, hello, leaving U.A.?? donning himself in his teacher’s old cape?? empty, exhausted look in his eyes?? what else were we supposed to think lol.

but maybe that was an overreaction. because when I think about it more, Gran’s death isn’t strictly necessary in order to push Deku over the edge. first of all, there’s already the whole “hero society is in ruins now because of you” thing I mentioned earlier. but also, there are just so many other things. like, let’s just list them here because omg. what a rough couple of days this kid had.

he was forced to battle TomurAFO and was terribly injured in the process (most of which was his own fault, but he wouldn’t have gone that far with OFA unless he felt like he had no choice)

and it wasn’t just him that was injured, either. in fact, even though he tried to act as bait to keep everyone else safe, he wasn’t able to stop three of the people closest to him from nearly being killed right before his eyes

and of course that last one was especially traumatic, because it was Kacchan, and because he had to watch Kacchan nearly die just to protect him. out of all the things that Deku witnessed in this arc, this might be the one that had the biggest impact on him

he was also basically helpless to do anything to protect Shouto and Endeavor when Dabi showed up. so again, we have this running theme of people he cares about being hurt and him not being able to save them

and he also got sucked into the OFA Interstellar Dream Vortex for a brief spell during the battle, during which he learned that AFO had possessed Tomura. more importantly, he learned that Tomura was Nana’s grandson, a fact which was only briefly touched on during that scene, but which I think wound up being the trigger to the whole avalanche that ended with Deku leaving UA. but more on that in a moment

anyway so just to wrap this all up, the battle eventually ended, Tomura got away despite all of their efforts, and then Deku wound up comatose in the hospital for two days. which brings us to the most recent chapters, during which

Deku learns that he will be the last wielder of OFA, whether he likes or not

Deku learns the identity of the last two mystery OFA users

and then at some point, he wakes up and presumably talks to Gran, and winds up with his cape

something happened during these last two scenes which helped to push Deku over the edge. I won’t delve into the matter of the Second or Third users for now, although most of you already know my suspicions regarding that, and I do think that would fit into the general pattern here (that is, the pattern of Deku feeling more and more strongly that he is putting the people around him in danger, and his fear of losing them becoming so overwhelming that it eventually pushes him to leave).

but that’s not what I want to talk about for now. what I want to talk about is Gran. specifically, what it is that Deku discussed with Gran. and this is where we come back to that reveal I mentioned earlier -- that Tomura is Nana’s grandchild.

basically, what I think happened is that Deku mentioned seeing Nana in the OFA Zany Psychedelic Spirit Void, which led to the topic of Tomura, and the fun fact Deku recently learned about him being related to Nana. this, in turn leads to Gran divulging his various regrets about everything that happened with him and Nana and Kotarou. his intent is to apologize to Deku for placing the burden of their failures on him. unfortunately, the part that Deku actually gets fixated on instead is this:

All for One hunted down and killed Nana’s son (and probably her husband as well), and stole her grandchild and psychologically tortured him into becoming a mass murderer, for no other reason than that Nana had once held OFA

in other words, AFO can and will hurt and kill anyone Deku is close to, anyone who has any kind of connection to him at all, without mercy, and regardless of whether it actually gives him any kind of tactical advantage or not. he’ll do it simply to hurt him. no other reason necessary.

I don’t know about you, but for me that would be a terrifying realization. and for Deku, I think it just might have been the tipping point.

so, let’s recap.

Deku learns that AFO is after him

AFO/Tomura very nearly kills several of Deku’s most important people, including Kacchan

and then he learns that this is just the tip of the iceberg, and realizes that all of their lives are still in danger and will continue to be as long as Deku is AFO’s target

and then add to all of this the misplaced guilt about society already being shambles, and the heroes already having more than enough to worry about. they’re barely holding things together as it is. and we already know how Deku feels about being a burden to them:

and so instead, he leaves. of course he does. in hindsight, I think this was inevitable.

the question is, did anyone else also put the pieces together in time to realize what Deku was planning before he actually left? specifically, did Katsuki, who understands Deku’s self-sacrificial nature better than anyone else, see the signs and put two and two together? like he did back at Jakku?

and if he did, would Deku have been willing to accept his help again?

somehow, I can’t help but think it might not be that easy this time.

anyway, so that was a lot of rambling, lol. sorry about that. I JUST HAVE A LOT OF FEELINGS about all of this angsty shit. tired nomad Deku needs hugs and comfort and someone to reassure him that he doesn’t have to face this alone, and that everything is going to be all right. HE IS JUST A LITTLE BOY. this is too much, and I cannot handle any of these feels, and oh my god, somebody please help him.

#bnha 306 #midoriya izuku #bakugou katsuki #todoroki shouto #gran torino #bnha meta #deku meta #bakugou meta #bnha #boku no hero academia #bnha spoilers #mha spoilers #bnha manga spoilers #makeste reads bnha #long post #bakudeku #todobaku

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yanderenightmare · 3 years

Note

OK but that dumb darling drabble thing for Shiggy and Dabi you wrote? Perfection. But imagine her doing those things in front of the league while they're meeting in the hideout. Still randomly stripping for Dabi just in case that's what he meant, and happily sucking off Shiggy as the rest of the members watch her get on her knees like they're they only people in the room..

yandere ! BNHA thirsts

DUMB-DARLING

goodiebag WARNINGS: nsfw, dumbification, condescension

DABI - TODOROKI TOUYA

It’s not often people get to see Dabi freak out or get flustered. What’s even more rare is seeing him laugh, unless it’s one of his trademark eerily dark chuckles and snickers, the ones that have his teeth dripping in venom. However, what’s the most surprising is seeing him actually care about something for once, to see him be protective and even scared just a tiny smidge. How he’ll jump almost like a father protecting his daughter from sleazy hormonal boys, hide his little darling behind his long leather coat while she’s in the midst of making a strip-tease in front of the whole crew.

She’s as clueless as always, batting those big dopey doe-eyes at him, asking him ever so innocently if that was not what he’d wanted, standing there tits perky and lips pouty, and he’ll only barely be able to answer her, so caught in his disbelief of how fucking adorably ditzy she is, not sure of whether he should be proud, worried, amused or upset, settling for feeling a little bit of everything, though needing to pull himself together enough to growl at the rowdy boys behind him as they whistle and howl at his girl.

But honestly, how is she ever supposed to learn anything? When he fucks her stupid every time she does what she thinks is right and strips and struts around in her god-given birthday-suit. He’ll wrap her up in his coat and carry her to his dwelling, drop her on the bed, watch her bounce as he runs his hands through his unruly hair, cock straining inside his tight black jeans, cursing as he knows he should haul-ass and get back to the meeting, though lacking the respect and settling for getting his dick wet instead.

She’s featherbrained, but it’s exactly what he needs to cut loose stress, to calm down, to get out of dull life-draining meetings.

SHIGARAKI TOMURA

Shiggy’s a little less reserved than Dabi, shameless and proud, happily showing off his dumb little slut in front of everyone, having her gluck and suck on his cock beneath the table, wet noises distracting absolutely everyone as he lays out the battle-plans, or when having her sleeved on his fat cock, bouncing her on his knee as she giggles out moans like the stupidly cute brainless fuck-toy she is, all eyes on her instead of the blueprints laid out on the table.

Though he’ll just as easily yell at everybody to get the fuck out once he sees them staring just a bit too much, just a bit too longingly and hungrily at something that’s so obviously his. He’ll easily dust a fucker who dares touch her, or talk to her, or about her. The threshold to his tolerance is as thin as his skin when it comes to her, just like a child with his favorite toy. Smart people know to stay away, but there are a lot of dumb fucks in the league. Good thing they have no need for dumb things unless they’re cute.

But it’s not all carnal, surprisingly. Sometimes she’ll fall asleep, head tucked into his neck, with her hands tussled up under the warm comfort of his black hoodie, soft snores leaving her where she’s curled up like unsuspecting prey on the dangerous villains lap like she’s no way in any danger. It’s strange to see the otherwise volatile unstable leader calm down for the sake of not waking the dummy clinging tightly to his chest. The other league-members even have to admit that it’s cute, though they’d never tell him out-loud.

Being dumb has its perks, being a simple creature she’ll always seek simple pleasures like sleeping, eating and fucking, but most importantly, she’ll never be smart enough to fear him.

#yandere dabi #yandere todoroki #yandere shigaraki tomura #yandere shigaraki #yandere shiggy #yandere tomura #yandere tomura shigaraki #yandere boku no hero academia

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class1akids · 3 years

Note

I know it‘s an old hat by now. But thinking of how long and pointless the overhaul arc was, reminded of the interns homecoming. How everyone got some small acknowledgement over the ordeal they’ve been through by the teachers and the class. And know it’s just the deku show. While todoroki and bakugou are again sidelined. No matter if they act wrong (exam) or right (war). They are not allowed to shine or to receive comfort. As 2/3 of the origin trio. That’s just sad.

This is so incredibly upsetting to me. It's like reading the a slow-burn hurt/no comfort fic where Bakugou and Todoroki were tagged as main characters, but don't even get 10% of the content.

The post-war has been absolutely egregious from this perspective. While Deku got fawned over and lifted up by everyone - vestiges, his mom, All Might, the Top 3, then the entire class, then, Kota, fox lady, even Nagant,

Bakugou's aftermath was basically:

No acknowledgement of his self-sacrifice by anyone at all

No concern from anyone, save the first interaction with Mineta, Satou and Sero - characters he barely has any connection to

No interaction with his parents or All Might, BJ just treating him like a joke

No reflection of how Deku leaving affected him beyond wanting to apologize, no acknowledgement of how much it must have hurt

Spending all his time and energy on retrieving Deku and apologizing

No follow-up to the apology

The rest of the time, even his pain and worry is treated as comic relief.

Even worse offender is Todoroki's aftermath, which is:

Losing his voice, to make him a mute spectator in his own arc, while everyone else in the family gets to talk about their feelings

His reunion with his mom is off-screened, despite saving her being at the center of his arc (while we get like 5 pages of Inko hugging Deku)

His "hero-moment" gets fully credited to Deku

His team-up with his dad is cast aside for Deku

He gets ghosted by Endeavor

No acknowledgement from anyone what he must be going through whether from the trauma of the reveal, of almost being killed by his own brother or the civilian backlash to the family drama becoming public and no attempt at comfort or checking up if he's ok from his classmates, or anyone really

Being stuck outside the school while everyone else gets to interact and bond with the citizens then this plot point is brushed aside too

And maybe the worst of all is that while Deku gets constantly validated even for going off alone and treating his classmates as useless weaklings, the narrative for Todoroki chooses to circle back instead to his Early-roki phase, in such a clumsy way, that makes it almost feel like the story is telling us what's happening to him is his fault. (I don't think that's what it's telling us, but it is very oddly written and oddly placed).

The other kids who have been through a lot, like Momo losing two mentors, Mina freezing, Kirishima and Satou who also find Midnight's body, Tokoyami facing off and being injured by Dabi and seeing Twice's body, Kaminari's injury - none of this is addressed. Even with Ochako, who does get focus, it's all basically tied to Deku. Her moments as a hero on her own right who did a lot of rescuing in the clean-up stage does not get any acknowledgment whatsoever.

It makes me so sad because I feel like Horikoshi must not care about these characters much anymore to be able to push them aside like this as a writer and not think of trying to ease the anguish the writing left them in a little bit. They are clearly just an afterthought for him, bullet points to check off. But for those of us invested, there is no pay-off for all the stress and hurt caused in the war.

#bnha critical #c1a asks #bakugou katsuki #todoroki shouto #class a #aftermath arc

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fuwushiguro · 3 years

Text

All The Things You Said

Hawks x f!reader | Dabi x f!reader

Characters: Hawks, Dabi

Genre: Smut & Angst

Notes: Valentine’s Day Special!!! I LOVE this fic this is my favourite one I’ve written to date. Set in an AU, Hawks is only referred to as Keigo but he’s the owner of a company called Hawks. Dabi is Touya in this and he still has all his burns.

Warnings: 18+, dubcon/noncon, manipulation, daddy kink, possessiveness/jealousy, rough sex, public sex???? kinda, degradation, dumbification, brat taming???, choking, face fucking, spoiler warning!

Words: 10.3k

Synopsis: Your childhood best friend passed away and you never truly got over his death. Years later you manage to move on and end up engaged to someone else. Sure, you love him. But you’re not in love with him. How can you love anyone when you keep comparing them to someone who’s dead?

☆

I Miss You.

You were never fussed about Valentine’s Day. Of course you engaged in it, it’s an adoring time of year whether it be for a partner or loved ones. A day to express love is something everyone should partake in regardless of relationship status. But you weren’t single. The last six Valentine’s you had a boyfriend – scratch that – a fiancé. You loved him, dearly. He was a sweet, oh so sweet, man who treat you right. Loving you and cherishing you, wholly. So why was today so hard for you? Why did you struggle to enjoy the day with your whole entire being? You had loved ones; you even had the perfect partner. What’s missing? You worried when the time came around, because your fiancé always went above and beyond to express his love for you. So why was it that you felt unfulfilled? Why isn’t it enough for you. You do love him. You tell him so, daily. You tell yourself daily too. And it was true. You did love him. But you weren’t in love with him.

I Miss You.

You wake up with the same thought every day. It has been years since you saw him. Touya. You mourn him everyday like the wound is still fresh. How could your best friend die so young? The Todoroki family seemed to move on, so why couldn’t you? You still kept in contact, not a lot. Not enough to rouse suspicion from your partner. But enough to know what each of them were up too. It was only last year that Rei was released from her hospitalisation, you were happy for her. It had understandably taken a lot of time for her to recover from what happened to her eldest son. A house fire. It always struck you as unusual that the body was never recovered. Shoto told you (coldly you might add) that the heat from the fire was so hot he burnt to ash. His family scolded him for such a vile thought, but the youngest Todoroki boy had always been like that. Matter of fact. Up Front. Savage. Those words never left your memory. Is it even possible for flames to be so hot? The Todoroki’s cut all contact with Enji. The way he had treated the family was unforgiveable, and the death of your childhood sweetheart was the final straw. He was your age. What would he be doing today if he survived? Would you have been engaged to him instead of your current beau? He always wanted to follow in his father’s footsteps and be a fireman, ironic isn’t it?

I Miss You.

You’d spoken to Rei, recently, since her release. She adored you. She was fond of your little friendship with her son. She had photographs of the two of you, telling you not to hesitate and visit to look through them with her. She loved looking at old photographs. She adored her boy. He was such a treasure to her, a wonderful son who couldn’t be more perfect. But you knew that. He was the most perfect person you’d ever met. Such fire laid within him, he was hot headed but it was all put into his determination. He so desperately wanted to prove himself to Enji, but he wasn’t good enough. How couldn’t he see that his son was more than enough? You’ve never met anyone like him since, and you’re sure you never will. How could you? There was only one Touya, and you like to think he’s watching you. You want to think you’re making him proud.

I Miss You.

Keigo was a wonderful man. He was rich, handsome and had an upstanding job. But he certainly wasn’t Toya. You’re never able to shake the feeling that Keigo propositioned you because of your social standing. Your mother is a well-respected politician. Your father is a doctor. You’re an only child. You’d been raised destined for greatness, and Keigo did his research. He didn’t let it slip, in fact he still hasn’t. But he said something that exposed him. On your fifth date, he told you that he voted for your mother in the most recent council election. You never told him who your mother was. You don’t mind, why would you? He did his research. But why is what you weren’t sure of. But you had your suspicions nonetheless. He wanted a wife with a high social standing. A woman on his arm and a ring on her finger who was the daughter of a politician and a surgeon. What is more respectable than that? Keigo showed his love through his spending. He was so rich, the thought of his net worth forced blood to rush to your cheeks. You couldn’t believe someone like him would want a simple Mathematics Major like you. When you met Keigo, you had no intention of letting him pursue you. It had been eleven years since Toya passed when you met him. You couldn’t get him off your mind, you couldn’t if you tried. Each morning you woke up and thought of his face. Your memories. And hell you still do. It’s been seventeen years since you lost him now. But it has gotten easier, and you have Keigo to thank for that. Whether his intentions are honourable or not. You didn’t think you’d ever allow yourself to love or be loved by another man. You were eighteen when you met the honey haired gentleman. It was unfair to hold anyone to the standard of Touya. No one would ever compare. Why place that pressure on your shoulders or anyone else’s?

I Miss You.

Your university friends told you it was stupid to hold onto the love of your seven-year-old self. But you couldn’t help it. Every single day of your little lives you talked about growing up. You being you, super forward, you told him that you loved him. Daily. You talked about wanting to marry him every single day. And him being a young boy, he was repulsed. But you wore him down. He told you he wanted to be married and be best friends forever. Rei overheard this little conversation as she brought some juice for the two of you and hatched a plan. She forced you both into the TV room and demanded that you focus your attention on the cartoons that were playing. When she came back to collect you, the back garden was decorated in flowers and a prop wedding set she’d purchased for Fuyumi one Christmas. She’d never used it. She gave Touya a little tuxedo and gave you the wedding dress that came with the set. You had your wedding. His siblings attended, even Enji cracked a smile. Rei took so many photographs. You couldn’t wait to visit her again to reminisce on that moment. You remembered one photograph in particular. You were under the wedding arch, Toya had his arm around you with the biggest grin on his face. And you were laughing. Joyously laughing, that moment was bliss. You were a seven-year-old widow.

I Miss You.

You weren’t yourself after he died. You stopped talking. You barely ate, your parents had to force water down your throat to keep you hydrated. They eventually took you to a psychologist. They suggested PTSD. She’s not a soldier, she’s never been to war. You remember your father’s words ringing in your ears. Waking up everyday knowing your best friend had burnt to death was a war all in itself. The psychologist encouraged them to inspire you to draw, to create, to dance. Anything to help you connect your thoughts in your mind to the muscle in your mouth. Drawing did help, the drawings were graphic in the beginning. You couldn’t stop yourself from using fiery red and orange crayons to draw the flames that consumed your friend. But as time passed, they became nice. You and him holding hands. Playing in the garden. Your pretend wedding. You did talk again, months later your talked. Your mother cried that day.

I Miss You.

But maybe your friend’s harsh words were right. Mourning a childhood love for eleven years would do you no favours at all. Besides, Keigo was extremely attractive. She told you if you didn’t take him for a test drive, she sure would. You lost your virginity to Keigo, you don’t know if he knows that. You never told him about Touya. You never told him about your mourning. That’s not something you want to share with another man, any man. You’d only known him for six months when he proposed to you. It is a huge decision for an eighteen-year-old to make. But like your mother said: you aren’t getting any younger, darling. You won’t do better than a man with his own company. She was right. If you thought you’d never love anyone more than Touya, why not marry someone as sweet as Keigo? He did love you after all. But he loved you a whole lot more than you loved him. He owned his own athletic company: Hawks. He sold athletic clothes as well as gear. It was so streamline and sought after, he rose to fame and fortune. He deserved it, he is such a nice man.

I Miss You.

☆ ☆ ☆

“Did you say something babe?” Your fiancé questioned as he emerged from the bathroom, toothpaste foaming in his mouth. You half-heartedly turned your head to meet his gaze, not quite sure what he said. You stared into his golden eyes that glimmered each time the sunlight beaming through the window dipped into them. You didn’t answer, what did he even say? “Sounded like you were saying you miss me over and over.” He added. You shook your head. Today wouldn’t be the day you’d tell him about Touya, that day didn’t exist. You insisted you were singing song lyrics, you had one line stuck in your head and kept repeating it over and over. Don’t you hate it when that happens? He smiled, taking his leave to spit his toothpaste into the sink. He remerged from the en-suite. His shirtless body shimmering with sweat. He must have been doing pull ups in the doorway again. His joggers riding particularly low, just below his pubic bone, revealing a light snail trail up to his belly button and teasing the beginnings of his trimmed bush. Your thoughts weren’t deterred. Still thinking about Touya.

You stood up, the time was ticking on and your day had to begin at some point. Touya’s memory wasn’t going anywhere, you could mourn him any time of day. Before you could leave, the blonde whistled to you, demanding your attention. Couldn’t he just say your name? What could be so important to forget decent manners?

“Have you brushed your teeth yet birdie?” He questioned. Lazily, you shook your head.

“Was just about too.” You told him. He approached you, almost menacingly, with a calculated smile on his face. What is happening? He handed a piece of paper to you. Oh for fuck sake. “Not now.” You told him.

“Read the clause.” He told you.

“I’ve read the fucking clause before I bought you the fucking things.” You moaned at him.

“So what’s the fucking hold up, dove?” He asked, stretching out his arms in question. You scrunched your face in annoyance. You curse your past self for buying such a stupid Valentine’s gift last year. How did he even have any left? Last year, you were so wrapped up and consumed in grief for Toyua, you forgot all about Valentine’s day. Before you returned home from your depressing day at his grave, you ran into a sex shop. Everything was so lewd and tacky, but you knew there’d be something you could get for your man. And there they were. Those god forsaken sex cheques. He loved them. You thought he’d be mad with the lack of effort on your behalf, but he was so amused. He ran through a few of them immediately. What else is Valentine’s Day for? You lost your ass virginity that day. You tied your hair into a ponytail with a bobble from your side table and Keigo began removing his joggers. “Get over here.” He commanded. The point of the cheques is that they can’t bounce, why didn’t you think of the consequences? You were in no mood to have your throat full of his skin.

You walked over to where he was sitting, palming himself. It’s these particular moments you see that your lover can’t keep up the perfect gentleman act twenty-four hours a day. Reluctantly you replaced his hand with your own and started pumping his cock. His head fell back instantly as the sensation washed over him. He let you continue as he started gently rocking his hips in unison with your pumping fist. You took it upon yourself to lower your head and began to suckle on his balls. A hearty moan fell passed the mans lips in delight. “What a good little whore you are, huh? Didn’t even have to tell you.” He expressed. You ignored him as you carried on, you kept suctioning the bags into your mouth and swirling your tongue around him. He laced his fingers into your hair as he watched you perform on him. The way the compliments, cusses and sighs were tumbling from his panting lips, you were sure you’d be able to make him cum from this alone.

But that’s not what he wanted. His gentle caressing of your hair that tangled between his fingers became a harsh grasp that caused you to stop what you were doing and yelp slightly with the sudden change in pressure to your scalp. “My cheque was for a blowjob baby, so why haven’t you given my cock any attention yet?” He questioned as he forced you to be eye level with his leaking slit. You cleared your throat, ready for the intrusion in your mouth.

“Sorry Sir.” You lamented. You ran your tongue across your lips and stretched your mouth into an ‘O’ shape, hoping you’d be able to control your gag reflex for as long as possible. You submerged his cock slowly into your mouth, eliciting more of the cursing he’d been moaning into the atmosphere. You felt more of his arousal seep from his erection, the flavour tickling the wet muscle that was sloshing around his member. You were doing a good job, the compliments hurling out of him repeatedly. It was enough to make you blush, you didn’t want to be doing this right now, but the praise was something that filled you with giddy pride. You thought you were doing a good job. But apparently not good enough.

“Stay still.” He directed. You did as you were told, wary, knowing what was about to take place. He had a firm clasp on your hair now, angling himself to be in the perfect position. “I’m going to fuck that pretty lil mouth of yours, okay dove?” He questioned, but not really. It was more of a warning. You hated when he did this. You’d told him so plenty of times, but he didn’t care. He told you the licking and bobbing was nice enough, but you couldn’t fuck him with your throat like he could himself. You felt dirty. This wasn’t a loving act, he was using you as his own personal toy to get off. He began to pick up his pace and he sounded like an animal. He was grunting and panting in between his moans. “What a perfect little – fuck – little slut you are for me baby. I’m, hng, I’m not gonna last.” He told you. You felt tears welling at your eyes. His pacing was relentless, and the assault was brutal. You just wanted it to be over, please hurry up. The thrusting endured. Holding your eyes shut so tightly, trying to stop the tears from slithering down your cheeks. But he wouldn’t allow that. He yanked your ponytail and pulled your gaze to his, his eyes alone were instructing you not to dare look away from him while he was giving you the gift of his enormous cock swelling into your throat. The pleasure, of him letting you be so lucky to taste his cum. A tear slipped from your lash line, and that’s when he did it. He’d found his high and chased his release. You felt creamy, warm spurts of his cum gather in your mouth, travelling around the orifice as he continued rocking into you. “Drink up birdie.” He smiled, tucking a loose strand of hair behind your ear. Almost caringly. You swallowed every drop of his seed that he’d released into your mouth. “Show me.” He instructed. You spat your tongue out and opened your mouth as wide as you could, moving your head around to show him all angles of the wet cavern. “What do you say?”

“Thank you, Sir.” You meekly responded.

“Good girl.” He helped you to your feet and you began walking towards the bathroom to shower and brush your teeth, desperate to erase the flavour of skin and salt from your tastebuds. “Do you want to do something together today?” He asked, before you had chance to leave the room.

“I have plans with Leah.” You told him.

“That’s fine,” He smiled, “We’ll be spending the whole day together tomorrow after all.” He reminded you, and you smiled back. You began to continue your journey towards the bathroom.

You heard footsteps getting louder and louder, you turned to face them. Keigo was following you.

“I think I’ll join you for a shower.”

☆ ☆ ☆

You’d never engaged in a bottomless brunch before, but Leah insisted. She was your oldest friend from your school days, and she knew how hard this time of year was for you. You had a bit of food but the pair of you were mostly consuming the mimosas. You couldn’t help but let your mind wander, the alcohol was going straight to your head after all. Normally when you’re in good company and being distracted, your mind doesn’t instantly race to Touya. But you just couldn’t help it dammit. Whenever you’d see a head of Crimson hair, you’d hope he’d survived the fire. It’s him, please be him. It never was. Why do you let yourself have hope? Why won’t you give Keigo the chance to love you wholly, why won’t you give yourself the chance to love him as much as he loves you? Leah made sure to check on you around this time every year, she’s a beautiful friend. Her soul is so kind, and she cares for you deeply. She’s one of those rare friends you know you can always count on. She’d offered to accompany you to Touya’s grave today, but you declined. That is something truly sacred. You had to do that alone.

You visited his grave regularly. Christmases, birthday’s, the anniversary of his death. His family were often in attendance for these days too, these would be the days you’d end up visiting the Todoroki home and having a catch up. But Valentine’s Day is a day you’d never seen any of them. Why is that? It’s a day for loved ones after all. Didn’t they love him? Maybe they didn’t care about Valentine’s Day, maybe to them it is only a day for couples. But you wouldn’t forget to give him your love. You had to start going the day prior to Valentine’s Day because of Keigo, you couldn’t explain any of this to him, it’s too much and too weird. He’s a jealous man. He may be the perfect gentleman, but no one is truly perfect. Just Touya. His harsh squeezes on your shoulder at business events never went amiss whenever another man would get too friendly with you. He’d never bring it up, but when you were in the privacy of your own home, he’d be silent. His punishment to you for allowing yourself to be taken in so easily by another man. You were just being polite. You’re just a cheap slut. You’d never forget that. He spat the words at you and forced you to sleep on the sofa. He had a seven-bedroom home, you could have slept in a spare room, but he wanted to punish you. Whores don’t deserve a bed. Are all men like this?

This was the trouble with being with one man seriously in your whole life. What did you have to compare him too? Is this how they all treat women? Would Touya grow up to be like this? You shook the thought and downed another flute of your mimosa. Leah suggested that you slow down, she was right. She was always right. You’d be a stuttering, slurring mess for Toya. He deserved better than that. You held your head in your hands and began talking to yourself, Leah couldn’t help but pity you.

“Pull yourself together. Come on, be better for Touya.” You whispered to yourself, but it was loud enough for your friend to hear. You’d been having a good time, but things were starting to go south. What were you thinking getting this wasted before the clock had even struck 12pm? You’d rather have been drunk tomorrow and spoil your day with Keigo than Touya. You see Keigo every single day of your life, you have to steal moments with Touya. How could you have done this to him?

“I think I should come with you today.” Leah insisted. You forcibly shook your head. Why can’t she understand? You have to do this alone. It’s one of the rare chances you can spend with him. “I won’t come in the cemetery, I’ll wait outside.” She added. You exhaled heavily.

“I appreciate it Leah, I do. But you can’t be there.” You expressed. She tucked her lips into a straight line and nodded, indicating that she understood. You slumped back in your seat and covered your eyes from the bright blue sky with your hand. You couldn’t think of anything other than the pounding headache that was slowly approaching and the embarrassment you’d be when you visited Touya’s resting place.

“At least share a cab with me, we can drop you off at the grave and I’ll go home.” She suggested. You agreed, if only to put her mind at ease. It wasn’t a terrible idea anyway, silly to leave separately when you could leave together. You consumed a bread roll from the basket that had been left on the table in an attempt to sober you up slightly and requested the bill. You were waiting a while before the staff made their way to assist you, you didn’t mind though. You were dreading going to the cemetery like this. Part of you questioned whether you should go at all. But you had to, if you didn’t go now, you’d be letting him down. Leah tried to insist on paying her part of the bill, but you wouldn’t hear of it. You weren’t paying your own part of the bill, Keigo was. It wasn’t like he couldn’t afford it. It’s the least he could do after battering the halls of your throat with his stupidly fat cock this morning, you were thankful that Leah hadn’t commented on your particularly raspy voice today. It’s humiliating. What could you even say? It would have to be tonsilitis. But how selfish of you for attending this bottomless brunch date with a contagious ailment! But again, thankfully she didn’t ask. You finally managed to pay your bill as Leah stood on the sidewalk trying to hail a cab. She beckoned you closer as her figure slinked into an eerily apt black taxi.

This is it.

☆ ☆ ☆

Text me if you need anything or if you need to talk.

That was the last thing Leah said before she was driven away in the back of the black cab. The reality is truly setting in now that you’re alone. You’re about to see him. You’re going to see Touya. You’d picked a bouquet of flowers before you attended your brunch date with Leah. You never knew what to leave for him every time you visited, you tried to change it up. He was such a happy kid, white lilies seemed too bleak for him. He was such a ball of energy. Nothing phased him; if he fell, he’d get back up and try even harder to do whatever he was setting his mind too. His fiery temper got him in trouble a number of times with his parents, you’d seen it first-hand, but he was always so caring with you. You chose red tulips today. They were different, you never bought tulips before, but they were so red. They reminded you of his hair. I hope he likes them. You’d been staring at the entrance gate for seven minutes. Just go in! Why aren’t your legs moving? Go! You thought to yourself. You were scared. It’s not like you’d never been before, what was wrong with you today?

*Ping*

You took your phone from your jacket pocket and saw a message from Leah.

L: Ur so strong, u can do this! Gud luck xxx

She’s like a mind reader. With that, you took a deep inhale and opened the gate. Your legs were moving at a glacial pace, but at least they were moving. You had all of the time in the world to spend here, talking with Touya and crying as much as you needed to. So, what was a slow walk to his side in the grand scheme of a whole day? You loved to visit him; he can’t talk back but it’s nice to pretend. It gives you some form of solace to picture what he might reply to what you’re telling him. You also loved to see what trinkets, flowers and mementos were left from his family members. Your pace instinctively picked up at the very thought, what little gems would you see this time.

Ten minutes passed by and you finally approached him. Hello Touya. You thought. You didn’t immediately come close, just close enough to read his epitaph. His tombstone had previously been a brilliant, titanium white. It was quite pricey, but Enji and Rei wanted the best for their son. The years hadn’t been kind to it though, the elements had tainted the beautiful white tombstone to a washed out grey, stained with moss and damp from the rain. The family did their best to keep the monument as pristine as possible, but they could only do so much to restore it to its former glory. The epitaph read:

Our beloved Touya, son, brother, and husband.

You always cry when you read it. You were so humbled that they included you in his memory. Of course, you weren’t really married, but it was such a heart-warming gesture. You’d lived the rest of your life as his widow until you met Keigo, it may as well have been true. Eventually you worked up the courage to stop crying and sit by his side. There was a multicoloured pinwheel attached to the tombstone that was spinning quickly due to the wind. You noticed a new bouquet, it didn’t have a note, but they looked pretty fresh. There were small tea lights that were all burnt out and some photographs of Touya. His face was still so fresh in your mind. You’d been without him since you were seven, seventeen whole years since he died, and his face was still so present in your life. You couldn’t get him out of your head. What kind of sick God would let a seven-year-old boy burn to death? You felt a shadow consume your form as someone walked by, and you put your head in your hands. You couldn’t help but break down. You weren’t sure if your suffering would ever end.

“Why did you leave me Touya?” You sobbed, quietly into yourself.

“Dumb question,” A voice began, clearing their throat, “But are you alright?”

You didn’t dare look up, you couldn’t bare to let anyone see you like this. Your mascara was probably smeared down your cheeks. You replied with a simple ‘yes fine thank you.’ And continued to mutely cry.

“You don’t sound fine, someone special down there?” The raspy voice questioned; you could only assume he was gesturing to the soil that consumed Touya’s coffin.

“Childhood best friend, if you must know.” You responded, muffling into your hands.

“Sorry to hear that.” He spoke back.

You still couldn’t bare to look. You were too focused on your sadness. However, your curiosity got the better of you, peering up from the safety of your shielding hands. It was a very tall man. At least 6’4’’. His hair was darker than soot, and very spiky, dare you say unkempt. He was wearing a long flowing navy coat and a white shirt underneath. He wore an almost matching pair of navy jeans and long black boots. You caught sight of his sunglasses, noticing they were designer, Versace. You’d looked at a similar pair for a gift for Keigo, but you knew you’d never be able to afford them. He looked super fashionable, but not too appropriate for mourning a loved one. He rolled up his sleeves and you noticed a glimmer in the light. Are those staples? When you looked closer, you realised that both of his arms were covered in burns. You tried your best not to stare, not wanting to be rude. But upon further inspection, you realised most of his body was covered in the same burns. His ears and the lower half of his face, as well as part of his chest that his shirt and coat failed to cover. You questioned whether he had bags under his eyes or if they were burns too. He towered above the tombstone he was staring at, three down from Touya’s. He didn’t seem too upset, whoever they were. He turned his head to face you, quickly you tried to avert your gaze. You clocked a cheeky grin emanating from him in your peripheral vision. He began to approach you. Why is he coming closer? He didn’t come too close though. He paused, drinking you in. Studying every inch of your very being, you’d never felt so uncomfortable. You felt too awkward for staring at him a minute ago to call him out.

“Touya…” He spoke, reading the tombstone. “Died a long time ago huh? And you still visit the kid? Cute.” He added. You nodded, meekly.

“I loved him, a lot. I try and visit as much as I can, I don’t miss a Valentine’s Day. Even if I have to come a day early, I need him to know I still love him.” You explained, unsure why you were telling the scarred stranger your story.

“I’m sure he knows you still love him… Mooma.”

Your gaze shot in his direction. Mooma. You hadn’t heard that name in seventeen years. Touya was the only person who called you that. It was an inside joke. It was a pretty simple origin of a nickname. You’d been mooing like cows together, all of a sudden you were greeted by a random hiccup causing you to say Mooma. You were both laughing until your little bellies hurt from the contractions.

“Who are you?” You questioned. No one else knew about that name. But Touya is dead. He’d been dead for seventeen entire years. So who the hell is this man and how does he know about Mooma? He didn’t answer, he skulked slowly towards you. You stood to your feet and began backing away from him, slightly terrified. He could be anyone. He could be dangerous. But he stopped moving when he got close enough in your face that you could feel his body heat radiating from him. He audaciously smiled at you, seeming to be pleased with himself for intimidating you. Just as you were about to ask his identity once again, he removed his Versace sunglasses.

Tears cascaded without your consent from your lash-line. It’s him. It’s Touya. You’d recognise those piercing sapphire’s anywhere.

“Hey doll face.” He greeted.

“Touya… It’s really you.” You sobbed. He shook his head, confusing you.

“I go by Dabi now sweetheart. Touya died. But yeah, it’s me.” He told you, consuming you in his embrace.

You couldn’t believe it, you weren’t dreaming, you weren’t hallucinating. It was Touya, in the flesh. You’d dreamt about this moment your whole life, but never did you think it would come true. You were certain he died in that house fire, but they never found a body. But Shoto said that he burnt to ash, so you just accepted that. What other explanation could there be? He isn’t dead, that’s the explanation. He forced you out of his hold for a quick moment and began rooting around in his pockets. You tried to compose yourself a little, you were seeing someone you’d been dreaming of for seventeen years. You were crying hysterically, and you were a complete mess. It just wouldn’t do. You turned away from him while you tried to wipe away your tears, but you knew the damage had been done. When he finally stopped rifling through his pockets, he held out a piece of paper to you. You had no idea what it was, but you soon realised it was upside down. When you flipped it round, you collapsed to the ground in as tears spouted from your eyes. Touya came to your level and tried to help you back up. It was the wedding photograph. The one you wanted Rei to show you, the one you remembered so well. His arm around you. All of it exactly as you remembered.

“I fucking hate you for doing this to me Touya, Dabi, whoever you are. I hate you.” You wailed.

“No you don’t, you’re angry, I get it. When you calm down, we’re gonna go for a walk and find a nice place to sit and talk it all out. Okay, princess?”

You didn’t respond.

You hate him.

“Hey,” He squeezed your cheeks until your lips puckered, forcing you to look at him, “I said, okay princess?”

☆ ☆ ☆

You’d been sitting in an abandoned car park complex for four hours. You were weak at the knees when he called you princess. How could you possibly deny him the opportunity to explain? You’d waited seventeen years to see him, the time had come for your questions to be answered. For your mourning to subside. He explained that when the fire began, he was evidently burnt up pretty poorly. But when he got the chance, he took the moment to run away from home. He hated his family, all except his mother Rei. His siblings were conceived in an attempt to please his father, Enji. He wanted a strong lineage of Todoroki’s, and Touya wasn’t good enough for him. Once your anger had fled from your body, you sat next to him, watching the rain crash against the ground as he kept you warm in a side hug.

“I never stopped thinking about you princess.” He told you, as he planted soft kisses into your hair. “You were the one person I knew I could count on.” He explained.

“So why didn’t you tell me you weren’t really dead. You’ve had seventeen years to put me out of my misery Touya.” You scolded.

“It’s complicated doll, please don’t call me that.”

“Dabi means nothing to me, you’re Touya. You’re my Touya!” Your voice cracked as you felt tears consume you, you didn’t want to cry anymore, not tonight, but Jesus this was a lot to process.

“Your Touya died a long time ago.”

The words cut you to your core. You let a singular tear escape before pulling yourself together, you weren’t going to shed another tear over him. You had your answers now, he was alive. And he’s nothing like you remember. “Then I guess I’ll be going, there’s nothing for me here.” You picked yourself up from the ledge you were seated on and began heading towards the heavy downpour.

“I hear you’re getting married.”

You froze. He’d been talking about his faked death for so long it completely slipped your mind. You were so surrounded in a blanket of bliss that you forgot that you had a fiancé waiting for you at home. A Valentine to spend your day with tomorrow.

“That’s right.” You began, “His name is Keigo, I’m very happy.”

“We better get divorced then, huh sweetheart?” Touya teased. You couldn’t help but smile. You remembered the photograph he gave you and held it in your hands to view once again. “Look,” The raven-haired man started as he quickly approached you, grabbing your shoulders in his hands. He clung to you so tightly, like he never wanted to let you go again. “I want you princess, all for myself.” He stated.

“How fucking dare you?”

“You still love me, I know you do. That’s why you are the only person who went to my grave around Valentine’s Day. You don’t love Keigo, you love me.”

You didn’t even know what you could possibly respond to that. Of course you still loved him. You’d been pining over him for most of your life. You’d fantasised about him all grown up, revealing he’s alive and here to whisk you away for so long. But it’s not realistic. You’re engaged. You’re with Keigo. You have a life with him, you can’t just drop that, drop everything you know, everyone you love. Not for this. It’s something you’ve waited forever and a day for, but it’s not realistic. This isn’t a love story, he’s messed up.

“I have to go… Dabi.”

You turned on your heel to leave once again.

“Kiss me.” He instructed. “We didn’t even have a kiss at our wedding, I’ve dreamt of those sweet lips of yours for seventeen years. Kiss me.” He spoke. He was right, you pined for so long for this man, and you didn’t even kiss him. You hugged, cuddled, spooned, had sleepovers. But never kissed. You wanted it, it was something you needed. It wasn’t right, it wasn’t fair to Keigo. But you had to know. You ran towards him and he picked up his pace to you. He laced his fingers into your hair and your mouth eased into his. He used his grip in your hair to pull your face closer to his, but any closeness you felt would never be enough. It was everything you needed to feel. It was unadulterated passion, you never felt like this with Keigo. You know now, Keigo could truly never compare. Dabi was and is the love of your life. Your tongue began messaging his and he moved his hands from your hair to engulf you in his embrace. You ran your hair through his unrecognisable onyx locks and couldn’t control the soft moan that parted from your lips. You felt a smile form on the man’s face as he continued kissing you. His hands travelled down to your thigh, hooking it and forcing you to wrap your legs around his hips. Your lips didn’t separate for a single second as he carried you towards the bonnet of an abandoned car. He reached underneath your skirt and quickly snatched your panties down to your ankles, forcing a gasp to escape your lips. You felt his slender digits caress your inner thighs and quickly approach your warmth. Your breath was shaking, you were panting like crazy. Is this really happening? He plunged a finger into you and a mewl instantly left your body, making your lost love smile with pride. “You’re so fucking wet angel,” He teased. He started planting soft kisses on your thighs. “I love you.” He kissed. “I love you so fucking much.” He kissed again.

You pushed his hand away from you and stood to your feet. “I can’t do this Dabi, I have a fiancé… I need to go this was a mistake.” You began walking away once more, this time you meant it. You couldn’t betray Keigo like this, he’d been so good to you.

“Wait!” He called to you.

“No!” You shouted back as you continued walking.

“If you still love me, I’ll be here at midnight tomorrow waiting for you. I’ll take care of you, I fucking love you princess. I’ll wait all day and all night.”

“I won’t be here, leave me alone Dabi. Move on.” You coldly told him.

“I don’t care. I’ll wait here for you. You kissed me; I know you love me. If I know there’s a chance I’ll wait for you doll. I will be here.”

You can’t be there.

☆ ☆ ☆

When you returned home, Keigo couldn’t believe what a state you were in. You suspect he knew deep down that you had been crying, but you passed it off as the rain ruining your makeup. Holy shit, if only he knew. When you woke up this morning, there’s no way you could have anticipated in a million years that you’d be having your first kiss with Touya and getting fingered by him on the same day. It went too far, but you were at least proud of yourself for stopping before anything else happened. You had to cut yourself some slack, it was a tense situation. No one could judge you, what would anyone else do in that situation? It would take an incredibly strong woman to resist getting the chance to kiss your first love. It was meant to just be a kiss, Touya took it too far. You were thankful Keigo wasn’t horny when you arrived home. You’re so used to him pulling his cock out and bending you over the kitchen counter as soon as you walk through the door, but if he did today he would have noticed your panties were missing. You let Touya keep them. It was the least you could do, a memento to remember you by. You placed the photograph he gave you in one of the card holders in your purse. Keigo didn’t need to see it, he didn’t even need to know it existed. But at least you’d have your own memory of Touya. Not that you’d ever forget him, you’d never get your pretend wedding out of your mind. Now you had this photograph to remember it forever. But you also had a new memory. Dabi’s soft upper lip and charred lower. The way he roughly wrestled his tongue with yours. His scent. Fucking hell he smelt good. As disinterested in other men as you were, you always felt a weakness whenever a particularly good looking man would have his attractiveness increased with a cigarette in his mouth or his fingers. When they sensually blew smoke into your vicinity and you wanted to smell it until your lungs were filled. Dabi wore it so well. The way he held your weight in his arms as you rested your thighs on his hips and he carried you, continuing to hastily consume one another with fear that you’d lose each other once again. You clenched your thighs together as you felt your pussy throb, remembering how fucking delicious his finger felt working your velvety walls.

“Are you wet baby?” Keigo questioned as he took a swig from his whiskey filled tumbler. You were snapped out of your thoughts, you looked at him and knitted your eyebrows. You missed what he said, again. You had to stop doing this. Pull yourself together, forget about Dabi. “You only squirm like that when you want my cock, does my little slut want her masters cock?” He questioned. God no. You couldn’t think of anything worse. Knowing the current predicament you were in, you panicked that you might cry Dabi’s name rather than your fiancés. You shook your head adamantly. You just wanted to go to bed and forget the whole ordeal. So you left you left the blonde to continue watching whatever drivel had been playing on the TV to get yourself ready for bed. You went into your private bathroom and splashed cold water on your face, hoping it would calm you down slightly.

So help me God, stop thinking about him dummy. Stop it.

You changed into your cosiest, softest pyjamas and tucked yourself into bed. You drifted in and out of sleep but couldn’t seem to stay asleep for longer than twenty minutes at a time. Keigo didn’t come back to bed, you wondered if he’d fallen asleep in front of the TV. You kept seeing his face, Touya’s that is. You kept feeling his hands on you. In you. You were so flustered and frustrated. You had a thought, and quickly shook it off. That is a steady decline into insanity. You thought. You got comfortable once again. Drifting off, again. Waking up, again. You checked the clock. 2:46am. It had been 13 minutes since you last woke up. I’m losing my fucking mind. The nagging thought was back, again. You slid your pyjama bottoms off and started rubbing circles into your clit. It’s just to help me sleep. It doesn’t mean anything. I can’t sleep, I need to sleep. This will help. It’s not because Dabi got me so worked up earlier. Nope. The minute your fingers slid against your folds, you were mortified at how drenched you were. Maybe you should have let Keigo fuck you after all, it just felt wrong in so many ways. You could lie to yourself all you wanted, but this was because of Dabi. Using Keigo to relieve yourself was beyond fucked up. You spread your legs and massaged the bundle of nerves between you and allowed yourself to be consumed by the feeling of the rising knot in your stomach. You tried to think about Keigo. To make this fucked up situation more appropriate. You thought about times you fucked, and you were desperate for more. Times he made you cum so many times in a row your legs were shaking and you couldn’t support your own weight. But it just wasn’t cutting it. But as soon as images of Dabi finger fucking you entered your mind, soft mewls tumbled from your lips. Fuck. You thought. You could feel the arousal travelling through your entire being. You couldn’t even remember the last time you played with yourself. Keigo didn’t like it, if you wanted to cum he’d make you cum. This was heavenly. Going at your own pace and having the freedom to imagine what you wanted. You continued to moan through your actions, you began closing in on your impending orgasm. Fuck, fuck, fucking hell. You imagined Dabi’s voice sensually whispering princess into your ear. And that did it. Your toes were curling, you became a little sweaty and you were panting heavily. I’m such a bitch. You thought. But with that, you slipped away into dreamland and wouldn’t wake until the daylight broke.

☆ ☆ ☆

You stirred from your sleep with the sound of crackling from a pan. What on earth? You sprung from your bed, still no Keigo by your side, and walked through your stupidly enormous home to find the kitchen. There he was. He had a little apron on and was making breakfast.

“Aw no! Baby it was meant to be a surprise, I’m making you breakfast birdie!” He said disappointedly. You felt guilty for spoiling the surprise. You felt guilty for a lot of things lately.

“I didn’t see anything! I’ll go.” You told him, averting your gaze attempting to rush away.

“Don’t be silly, come sit.” He responded. You did as you were told and took a seat at the breakfast bar as he continued cooking. He’d made enough to feed a small village, you knew you wouldn’t be able to eat all of this. Why had he gone to such extremes? It’s Valentines Day of course, that’s why. “We’re gonna eat breakfast, then we’re heading to town and I’m buying you whatever you want. We can catch a movie, go for lunch, anything you want dove.” He expressed. Your heart was melting. How could you betray him like you had? How wasn’t he good enough for you? He loves Valentines Day. You’ve never been fussed. It’s a day to show your love, and you love that about today. But you don’t love Keigo. You loved Touya. You love Dabi. You had to make it work with Keigo, he was the man you needed to be with. You did love him after all. You just weren’t in love with him.

“Sounds perfect.” You smiled, taking a bite into a slice of toast he tried to keep out of your reach. He spent ages on breakfast. You were fit to burst when you devoured as much as you possibly could. You weren’t sure you’d make it to town, Keigo might have to roll you there. You had on call maids for whatever you needed, Keigo summoned them to tidy all of the plates and various other mess from the kitchen. He gave you permission to have a small siesta lasting the time it took for the mess to be cleared. He lay next to you in bed while you tried to drift off again, tickling your back, attempting to help you sleep sooner. You love your back being tickled.

Two hours passed and since you’d woken up, you had showered and gotten yourself ready to hit the town with the golden-haired man you were lucky enough to call your fiancé. You gave him a twirl showing him your outfit, head to toe in designer clothes, and he wolf whistled. You felt yourself going red in the face but were thankful to him. He treats you so well. He took you by your hand and led you to his Mercedes, even opening the passenger side door for you. Such a gentleman. The whole car ride, whenever he could rest his hand on your thigh, he would. It felt nice, it felt safe. You were his girl. He was making it known, marking his territory. He’s a very jealous guy after all.

You visited store, after store, after store. Your hands were so sore from all of the bags you had in your hands, you suspected Keigo felt the same way. He suggested that you load all of the bags into the car, it was an inspired idea. Once you dropped off all of the shopping, he took you by your hand and you walked to the theatre together. You’d never cared about romantic movies; you’d much rather go and see something spooky. It was the perfect opportunity to cuddle up with your partner and cower into his shoulder when you thought you might get scared. The film ended and you felt yourself getting hungry again. It was time for a dinner date. You had a hankering for a spicy pizza, so Keigo guided you to a little Italian place which had something he thought would be perfect for you. He was right. You couldn’t get enough. Keigo ordered another one, just for you. If you were hungry later, you could eat it. Or you could warm it up tomorrow. You smiled at the gesture; it was sweet. The pizza was great.

“Are you ready to head home dove?” He asked. You nodded. The sky had turned a deep purple when you had vacated the theatre. So by the time you finished eating, it had turned close to black. It was just after 10pm. You couldn’t help but wonder if Dabi was making his way to that abandoned parking complex. He said he’d be there at midnight. But maybe he’d get there early?

When you left the restaurant and approached your fiancé’s Mercedes, and he spun you onto the bonnet. Hiking your legs onto his hips and forcing harsh kisses onto your chest. He started signing his name as he sucked onto your supple flesh.

“Not here.” You told him.

“Yes here.” He replied. You shoved him away from you and walked towards the passenger seat of the car.

“I’m not doing that here Keigo, you can fuck my brains out at home okay?” You explained. He rolled his eyes and climbed into the drivers seat, readying himself to take you both home. The whole drive home was painful, he was in such a sulk. If he kept it up he could say goodbye to getting any at all. As soon as you stepped out of the car, he practically dragged you into the house. “What is wrong with you you’re hurting me Kei!” You complained as his grip on your wrist was too tight to bare.

“I can fuck your brains out at home, okay? We’re home. I had to wait all of that time to fuck you. I want you now.” He told you.

“You haven’t even closed the car doors or parked properly, get a hold of yourself.”

“Fuck the car, get in the house.” He commanded.

“Give me the keys, you’ll be sorry if someone steals all of my things as well as the car. I’ll be there in a minute okay? Go, I’ll be quick.” You told him.

He let out a ‘tsk’ and threw you the keys to his favourite of his many cars. He scurried into the house and you knew it was going to be a relentless fuck. But you would endure, look at everything he did for you today after all. It’s the least he deserves. You closed the door to your passenger side and climbed across into the drivers seat. Once the car engine was on, the dashboard lit up. 23:19. You exhaled deeply, correcting your thoughts. Park the car and go fuck your boyfriend. You told yourself. But before you could think, your body seemed to be moving without your consent. You were going to him.

You were going to Dabi.

☆ ☆ ☆

You arrived, late. He must have gone already. You were going to have to drive back to Keigo’s and explain why you felt the need to drive fifty minutes away from the house when all you were meant to be doing was parking the car. You hadn’t even gotten out yet, you just hoped you’d be able to see him. He played you for a fool, once a liar always a liar. He lied about being alive for seventeen years, of course he’d lie about waiting for you. Just as you buckled your seatbelt back in to secure yourself before driving back, you jumped out of your skin at the sound of knocking at your window.

Dabi.

You unbuckled yourself again and he backed away, allowing you space to open the car door. You stared at each other intently for a while, unsure of what to do. What are you even doing here? You can’t be here, you need to be with Keigo. But before you could think any further, you found yourself firmly planted into his embrace. He held you there for a moment, but your passion got the best of you both. You were practically inhaling each other the way your lips were clashing together and the breaths that were leaving each of you. He ripped your buttoned coat open, revealing your dainty little black dress and he drank in the vision before him. He noticed bruising on your chest, the hickeys from Keigo. He looked disappointed. You’d been claimed, you were meant to be his.

“I pushed him away, I didn’t want him Dabi. I want you.” You told him as you pulled him closer to you. He picked you up and sat you on the bonnet of the Mercedes, the same way Keigo had this evening. But this time, you were going to let Dabi do what he wanted with you. You needed him. “I didn’t think you were really going to be here.” You moaned, as the blue-eyed angel began imprinting his own name onto you.

“I told you princess; I’d be here. I’d have waited all night if I had too.” He said as he pulled the spaghetti straps down your arms, allowing him to pull your dress down a little and exposing your breasts.

“Fuck, Dabi.” You moaned. He raised your legs as he latched onto one of your nipples, swirling the perked bud with his tongue. You instantly felt the arousal consume your entire body. He’d moved your legs so that they were hooked around his hips, you could feel that the simple kissing and minor nipple play had completely drenched your panties. “I’m so wet.” You softly spoke. He moved your legs once again, spreading them as far as they would go. He lightly traced your clothed slit, you’d lost all control of the sounds that passed your lips. You needed him. Needed him.

“I’ve been dreaming of this pussy since yesterday. So cruel to let me have a taster and not let me finish what I started doll.” He told you as he continued to tease you.

“’m so sorry baby, so fucking sorry.”

“I got back to my place and had to fuck my fist because you wouldn’t let me have you. Do you think that’s fair doll?” He asked, “Teasing me with your little lacy panties as a gift… I knew you couldn’t stay away. But I think I need to punish you first don’t I?” He added.

“No p-please. Need you.”

“I needed you yesterday princess. Do you think that’s fair?”

You meekly shook your head. You wish you let him take you yesterday. You wanted to feel him inside you, feel his cock stretch you out, feel his cum coating your insides. “I couldn’t sleep last night. I fingered myself thinking about you baby. I’m so sorry I need you now. Please.” You begged pathetically. He began to unbuckle his jeans and pulled your body a bit closer to his. Pulling your panties off once again. You couldn’t see his cock, but you felt the tip of him circling your clit. It sent shudders through your whole body. “Please… daddy please.” You whimpered.

“Daddy? You’re a little slut like that, huh? Stop being a brat or I’ll change my mind.”

You tried your best to stay composed. But you could feel your cunt clenching, waiting for something to be inside. You needed to feel him inside of you, you weren’t sure you’d stay whole unless your entrance was filled with him. Like magic, you began to feel him stretch you out. “F-fuck daddy. ‘S big.” You cried.

“You said you needed me, little sluts get no prep.” The further he got into you a guttural moan left, it had come from deep in his abdomen.

“You’re such a good – fuck – good little slut for daddy aren’t you. So fucking tight doll, fuck.” He praised. You could feel your body turn red with embarrassment from the praise. He started rutting his hips into you and you could barely keep your eyes open. You worried that he’d soon tear you in half. But the more he pressed his cock into your tight hole, the better it felt. Soon pain turned to pleasure and soft ‘mmm’ sounds emanated from your body. “You like daddy fucking you princess?”

“Uh-huh.” You tried to smile, but not being able to concentrate on anything but your rising orgasm and he plunged his enormous, thick member into your pussy. You felt your walls clenching around him, hitting the spongey spot inside of you that made you cry out in pleasure.

“I’ve never fucked a pussy like this before princess. You’re fucking perfect. – holy shit, fuck – might have to put a baby in you.” He told you as he began chasing his own high, the pace of his thrusts increasing. Your tits jiggled softly the more he thrusted into you, he was entranced by the movement of them and latched onto your left bud once again, sensitively twirling the other between his fingers as he continued pounding into you.

“Daddy… mmm, ‘s good. Want your cum.”

“Want my cum? Did daddy’s cock make you stupid? Stupid princess wants daddy to fill her up?” He questioned.

“Fill me! Please!”

He scooped his arms under your torso and you wrapped your arms around your lovers neck, angling himself well enough to pound into your swollen pussy. You were so close to cumming. He could hear your hitched breaths and whispered in your ear.

“Cum for me princess, be a good fucking girl and cum for daddy.” He said. You concentrated, knowing you were close, so fucking close. You just needed one final push. “Be such a sweet little – oh fuck, Christ – sweet little slut and cream all over daddy’s cock doll.” He commanded. And with that, you cunt submitted. Your walls clenched around Dabi’s and that was enough to make him cum too, you felt his load spurt up into your abused hole and you felt good. All fucked out and full of his cum. He set you back down on the bonnet of Keigo’s car, raising and spreading your legs wide. Memerizing him the way that his cum dribbled out of your perfect cunt, a perfect cunt that belonged to him now.

“Thank you daddy.” You smiled best you could, all tired, stupid and filled to the brim with Dabi’s seed. He began planting delicate kisses down your thigh to your ass cheek.

“I love you princess.” He smiled back.

You needed a minute to gather your bearings. But there was no rush, everything in this moment with him was perfect.

“I’m gonna fuck you like this whenever you want. We’re going to go wherever the fuck we want in your exes stolen car. And do whatever the fuck we want.” He explained.

You exhaled happily at the thought.

“Happy Valentines Day, princess.”

I finally made a tag list!! If you wanna be tagged in my work, feel free to fill out this form, thank you hehe 💞

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inkykeiji · 3 years

Text

day 4 ❅ let’s go below zero and hide from the sun

i love you forever where we’ll have some fun

day three ❅ day four ❅ day five | series masterlist

character: todoroki touya | dabi

genre: smut + angst

notes: eeeeeeee meery christmas eve everyone, here’s day four!!!!! day four is my favourite out of the five, so i truly hope you all enjoy it as much as i do <3 as always, please pay attention to the warnings n stay safe!! | title credit: snowman by sia

warnings: 18+, pseudo-incest (stepcest), implied noncon, sub-drop, panic attacks, fingering, cockwarming, car sex, mentioned drug use, generally toxic relationships, size difference, verbal fights, tense family dynamics

words: 8.4k

synopsis:

“It’s nothing,”

Tender fingers tuck a tuft of alabaster behind his ear.

“It’s not nothing,”

“It doesn’t matter,”

Gentle lips place soft kisses along his jaw.

“It matters very much to me, niichan,”

“It’s—It’s stupid, fucking stupid,”

A small palm finds solace on his cheek, cupping it as a thumb strokes the skin.

“It’s not stupid if it’s hurting you, baby,”

❅ ❅ ❅ ❅ ❅ ❅

Sunlight streams through the crystal window, tiny dust motes playing hide and seek between the rays, painting golden beams across the smooth skin of Touya’s bare back, his skin almost sparkling in the warm light.

A little whimper slips from between your lips as your eyelids stick together, sealed shut by dry salt, brow furrowing as you finally pry them open. They hurt, dry and tacky and squinting against the too-bright light, spitting a hiss through your teeth.

“Ow,” you whine as you try to roll onto your side, every muscle in your body aching and stuffed full of exhaustion.

You’re sweating—Touya is always way too hot, and this bed is decidedly much too tiny for the both of you—raising a heavy arm to try and shove the sheets down to your waist, only to find that you can’t. It takes your hazy mind a few moments to realize that the sheets are stuck to your skin.

Bleary eyes blink twice, raising your head off of the plush pillow with immense effort and gazing down at your naked body. The muscles in your arms are screeching in protest as stiff, sore fingers fist in the sheets, giving one hard yank and ripping the material from your body, a sharp gasp hitching in your throat.

Hard, dried cum is splattered across your entire torso, wincing a little as you arch your back and watch it crack on your skin. Vibrant petals of indigo and violet have bloomed across your body, growing in places you don’t ever remember them being planted in.

What the hell happened last night?

It’s hard for you to recall, really, eyebrows knitting as you think hard, sifting through all of your recent memories and trying to remember when someone spurted cum all over your body.

Everything from last night is nothing but a tangled mess in your mind, with loops and crisscrosses, certain memories seeming to overlap, to morph together the more you think about them. It’s as if you’re watching an old film through a thick cloud of fog, flickering and stained with sepia as the sound keeps cutting in and out, the projector stopping once in a while, stuttering and repeating frames or burning holes through the filmstock.

It takes every ounce of strength you have to roll your beaten body onto your side, yelping softly from the massive effort. A sudden rush of tears pricks your eyes, burning in your throat as you try desperately to hold them back, to swallow them silently like a good little girl.

But it’s hard, tiny hiccupped sobs attempting to climb up your raw throat, catching painfully in your chest as you strive to suppress them, to gulp them back down, to force them back into the core of your body and stay put. Yet they refuse to cooperate, becoming more and more vicious as they fight against you, causing you to cough and choke on them as they finally escape your lips, and you mentally berate yourself for such a stupid rush of senseless emotions.

Don’t cry. There’s no reason to cry. It’s too early—you’re going to wake him and he’s going to be—

“Baby?” Touya croaks, voice deeper than normal, hoarser than normal.

And, God, he sounds so fucking hot in the morning.

“M’fine,” you say, though the words just come out sounding garbled and wet.

“Baby, baby, no,” he’s saying softly as he pushes himself into a sitting position, sheet pooling around his waist and exposing his chest, strong arms hooking under yours as he pulls you up and into his lap.

“I’m sorry,” you whine into his neck, shutting your eyes tightly as tears begin to leak from the corners.

“For what, princess?”

You don’t know. You just are. Shaking your head in response, you shove your face against him, letting your tears drip off your jaw and soak into his skin.

“Alright, alright,” a large hand pets your back rhythmically, up and down, up and down, fingers tracing along your spine. “Niichan’s got you,”

“What’s going on?”

The unexpected voice startles you, and you freeze in Touya’s embrace.

“Is she okay?”

It’s groggy and rough, vibrating in his throat, and you nuzzle into Touya’s shoulder, chest hiccupping.

“I don’t—I’m not sure,” Touya responds, and you can hear it, that hint of worry laced in his voice, accompanied by a sprinkling of frustration, but it only makes you cry harder, entire body trembling against him.

The other bed groans as Natsuo slides out of it, bare feet padding against the hardwood, your mattress dipping as he sits on the edge a moment later.

“Aw, poor baby,” Natsuo purrs, a soft, massive hand clamping down on your tense shoulder, thick fingers digging into your muscles. “Was last night too much for you, sweetheart?”

His voice is so patronizing, and you whimper a little against Touya, who kicks his younger brother’s thigh with his foot.

“Don’t be an asshole,”

“Says you,” Natsuo scoffs. “I’m being serious. It might be sub-drop,” The bed shifts again, and then kisses are being pressed to the column of your spine, down, down, down your back, words murmured sweetly into your skin. “I’m sorry, babygirl,”

“S’wasn’t too much f’me,” you mumble, heat seeping into your cheeks as both men laugh.

“Definitely sub-drop,” Touya says with a sigh, resting a large palm on your head. “I’ll run a bath,”

“I’ll make some tea and eggs,”

Peaking out from Touya’s shoulder, you watch as Natsuo heaves himself off the bed, snatching his shirt up from the floor and slipping it on before exiting your bedroom with nothing but his Frosty the Snowman briefs as bottoms.

Touya gently deposits you on the bed, slipping out from under you and shaking his head with a chuckle when you whine loudly, making little grabby hands for him, muttering Yup, definitely sub-drop under his breath.

Touya pulls on a pair of grey sweatpants and a nondescript black t-shirt over his head before he returns to the bed, laughing again at the involuntary pout set on your lips.

“C’mon, brat,” he murmurs affectionately, wrapping your naked, cum-stained body in the sheet before he hoists you up, carrying you across the hall to the bathroom and placing you on the counter, still swaddled up.

“Bubbles?” You ask, voice small as he bends to start running the bath.

“I dunno if we have any, princess,” he says with a small frown as he turns back to face you, sapphire eyes scanning the washroom quickly.

It turns out you do, in a pink bottle with faded Disney princesses on the worn label, hidden behind half-finished cans of old hairspray and expired toothpaste, covered in a thin layer of dust.

“Very fitting,” Touya snorts.

It must be over ten years old, but that’s alright—bubble bath doesn’t expire, does it?

Touya pours a bit too much of the syrupy magenta substance under the running water, resulting in you being encased in a mountain of foamy suds that reek of artificial bubblegum.

“Y-You’re not coming?” You ask, a frown materializing on your face as you watch Touya turn off the tap, wiping some of the bubbles that cling to his arm on his thigh.

“No, baby,” he says softly, kneeling in front of the tub. He guesses your next question before your dazed mind can find the word. “Because niichan wouldn’t be able to resist fucking you if he did, and that’s not what you need right now,”

“I could handle it,” you grumble, and Touya laughs, eyes glittering.

“It isn’t a question of whether or not you can handle it, it’s a question of whether or not you need it,”

But even without him snuggled behind you it’s nice nonetheless, your niichan cleaning your body slowly, unhurriedly, dragging a rough cloth across your skin and lathering soap in little circles, cleaning the sweat that has dried sticky and salty on your neck and collarbone, then elbow-deep in the water as he gently pries your thighs apart, scrubbing away the dried cum. Soft, murmured affirmations spill from his lips as he works, praising you for being such a good girl last night, for being such a good girl as he washes you.

Good girl, very good girl, his good girl, his best girl.

❅ ❅ ❅

Just past noon, Rei kicks you all out of the house.

“The Takasu Snow Park is open until four today,” she tells you curtly, practically shooing the five of you out of the cabin. “Don’t come back until it’s closed.”

She lets you take different cars, this time.

“And Touya, Shouto,” she calls from the doorway, lips pressed in a firm, thin line.

Both boys freeze at the sound of their names, hesitantly turning to meet their mother’s gaze.

“Don’t forget that you’re doing the dishes tonight,”

Shouto scoffs as he turns away, climbing into the back seat of Natsuo’s car, and Touya rolls his eyes, muttering something about being treated like a child, to which Fuyumi retorts that it’s only fair, considering the fact that he’s been acting like one.

❅ ❅ ❅

The Takasu Snow Park is just under an hour from the cabin. It’s surprisingly busy for Christmas Eve, filled with high-pitched squeals of excitement and bubbles of laughter as children wrapped up in brightly coloured snowsuits waddle around with tubes in tow.

And Touya drives right past it.

“Niichan, I think you just—”

“We aren’t going tubing, baby,” he says nonchalantly, a wicked spark glinting in his eye as he glances over at you, lips tugging up into a crooked smirk at the way your head quirks cutely, shaking it a little to indicate that you don’t understand what he means. “Niichan would rather play with that pretty pussy of yours instead,”

And he does, finding a shaded little nook just off the main road, snow squeaking under rubber tires as he pulls into it, partially obscuring his car.

“C’mere, princess,” he breathes, patting a thigh. “Come play with your niichan,”

You scamper across the center console and crawl into his lap, thighs straddling him and giggling a little as his fingers inch up, up, up, until they’re pushing your white lacy panties to the side and gliding against your slit.

“Something funny, pretty girl?”

“No, niichan,” you gasp as a finger dips into you, curling as he drags it out and repeating the action a few more times before adding another, your head finding purchase on his shoulder.

Nimble fingers work slowly, lazily, messily, Touya’s free hand busy scrolling through missed text messages on his work phone as he lets you pathetically rut against his palm, fucking yourself on his digits, craning his neck a little and allowing you to trace along the brilliant ink that stains his skin with your tongue.

And it’s nice. It’s almost romantic in a sense, just the two of you silently enjoying each other’s company, the only noise your gentle little mewls and a howling gust of wind every once in a while. The countryside, draped with freshly fallen snow from the storm yesterday, glitters in the late afternoon sun, the cloudless sky as blue as Touya’s eyes. You sigh dreamily as you gaze up at it, basking in the feeling of your niichan’s fingers buried inside of you, stroking your silky walls intermittently, just the two of you in your own little world, protected from everything else by the Audi’s bulletproof glass.

“W-Wanna cockwarm you,” the words are mumbled against his neck sleepily, your eyes lidded and heavy, only half conscious and barely aware of what you’re saying.

But you can feel his cock, hard and hot through dark denim, and it makes your little hole clench, fluttering around nothing. “Jus wanna be full, wanna be close,”

Touya’s chuckling as he shifts a little, hands slipping between your bodies to unbuckle his belt. “That so, princess? Is my baby girl being a needy little slut?” And despite the degrading words used, his tone is warm, gentle and full of compassion. “Niichan will let you sit on his cock if that’s what you want,”

“Please,” you’re whining, pulling back to gaze at him with bleary eyes. “Please, please,”

“Alright, greedy little thing,” he hushes you like he’s calming a fussy baby, shucking his jeans down just enough to let his cock spring out, using his thumb to push it forward, presenting it to you.

“So pretty, niichan, so pretty,” you’re mumbling as a small hand wraps around the base, squirming a little in his lap and lifting yourself to hover over him, knees digging into the leather on either side of his hips.

He lets you do all of the work, merely watching you through hooded eyes, an odd little grin present on his face. Touya doesn’t normally allow you to cockwarm him, hates how goddamn teasing it usually is, but he figures that today we have time to kill, so why not?

“There you go, baby,” he murmurs as you sink down on him, a loud moan getting caught in your throat. “You feel better now, huh? You feel better now that niichan’s stuffing your little cunt full?”

A soft whine is all you can manage, nodding dumbly against his shoulder. Yes, yes, you feel better, you feel right, you feel complete.

And you can’t help but hump him a little, hips rocking against his in tiny, shallow motions, clit catching on his pubic bone with every push forward and drag back.

“Yeah, that’s it, princess,” he breathes, though his eyes are still focused on his phone, reading an article about a drug bust you’re sure his gang was a part of. “Use niichan to get yourself off, come on,”

He tells you to go slow, to be careful, cute pussy still sore from the abuse it suffered last night, and you obey, hips moving in unhurried motions, just enjoying the feeling of him being inside you, of him being this close, of how good it feels, sweet little whimpers of niichan, niichan, being huffed out against his neck.

It takes a good half hour of grinding before you’re finally creaming all over his cock, body trembling in his arms as he hushes you through it, whispering into your hair how good you are for him, one of his hands gripping your hips and forcing you to keep moving until your body collapses against his, boneless and pliant. Touya affords you a few moments to come down, cock still buried deep inside you, twitching as it patiently waits for your breathing to calm.

He isn’t gonna fuck you, he tells you as he shifts your limp body off of his cock, not with how you were feeling this morning. But he doesn’t think it’s very fair to make niichan suffer with such a hard cock, especially after he just let you cum all over it.

You don’t think it’s very fair, either, murmuring your agreement to him as your hand wraps around the shaft, his cock jumping at your touch.

It’s still so wet from all of your own juices, aiding your hand as it pumps him, hard and fast the way he likes it, obscene squelching echoing throughout the car.

Heat floods your cheeks while you watch your motions, stomach curling in on itself as his cock gleams with your slick, and it’s so hot, that’s so hot baby.

It doesn’t take long to have him panting out those gorgeous sounds, throaty moans and broken little whines, and you can tell he’s close when his hips begin to shift, thrusting into your fist. But you don’t want him making a mess all over his nice car, or his pretty sweater, leaning down to close your lips around the tip and suckle, tongue swiping across his slit as your hand works.

He whimpers out a curse before his hips stutter, thrusting his cock into your mouth as it paints your throat with spurts of burning cream. And you swallow it all, like the good little girl you are, looking up at him with sparkling eyes as you thank him for his cum, and God he loves you, he loves you, he loves you.

❅ ❅ ❅

Christmas Eve dinner consists of a symphony of forks dragging across porcelain and spoons scraping against bowls. Rei tersely shoos everyone out of the kitchen the moment it’s over, brusquely ordering Touya and Shouto to get started on their chores.

The rest of the family shuffles into the living room, sitting stiffly on the couches, the television’s volume low as Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer plays on the screen.

Fuyumi tries to reason with her mother in a hushed urgent voice, tries to tell her that it’s a bad idea to leave the two of them alone, especially with Touya surrounded by so many objects that could potentially be used as weapons.

“They’re adults,” her mother responds, tone clipped. “And they aren’t alone,” grey eyes glance over at the kitchen, at her eldest and youngest standing together at the sink, frothy bubbles beginning to build as the tap runs. “I can see them perfectly fine from here.”

“Mom—” Natsuo begins, cutting himself off at the glare his mother shoots his way, swallowing his words and nodding instead. “—is right. Mom is right,” he looks over at his sister. “They’re fine, look at them,”

But his voice is high, thin, glassy, the words trembling ever so slightly as stone eyes dart towards his siblings, both with rigid shoulders, weighted with the thick tension suffocating the room.

“They should be fine,”

But it’s hard for you to watch, too much for you to watch, entire body consumed by sharp anxiety as you observe Touya’s stiff movements. His jaw is set, nostrils flaring as he glares down at the sink, frustration and anger and red-hot hatred beginning to ooze through his mask of passivity, to seep through the cracks Shouto’s dexterously created using hostile comments and snide glances as his tools.

And on Christmas Eve, that mask finally shatters.

Because Touya doesn’t have it in him to continue his act of indifference anymore, worn out and exhausted by the effort. Trembling hands pluck a spoon from the mountain of dishes sitting in the aluminum sink, wetting it with water and then laving over it with a soapy sponge.

He’s sure he’s coming down—even though it isn’t time yet, even though he knows, deep down, that the comedown is still a few hours away, even though he knows he knows his body better than this, has been swallowing oxys for so long that he’s got the comedown memorized, right down to the fucking second—but he swears he can feel it, can feel the migraine beginning to throb behind his eyes, can feel the cold sweat beginning to bead at his temples, can feel the chills beginning to course through his body despite how warm the cabin is, teeth grinding to keep from clattering.

The air stings his clenched teeth as he sucks in a breath, exhaling slowly, shakily, trying to force his mind to focus on the dish in his hand, on the warm water cascading over his skin, on the light scent of artificial lemon wafting from his sudsy skin. It’s fine, he’s fine, all he has to do is wash a few stupid dishes and then—

“Listen—”

“Shut the fuck up and scrub,”

“I just wanted to—”

“I have nothing to say to you,” Touya growls, gaze hyper-focused on the plate he’s been cleaning for over a minute now.

A lie. He has a lot to say to him, but he’d rather not make their mother cry, again, desperately hoping that Shouto will just shut his mouth and finish cleaning his side of the skin so they can get this fucking over with.

Shouto sighs, deep and patronizing, scoffing as his chest rises with the force of it.

“You’re impossible,” he grumbles. “Why can’t you—”

But then it’s all bubbling over, acidic words flowing from his mouth before he has a moment to consider what he’s saying. He wishes Shouto would’ve just left it, would’ve gritted his teeth like Touya and finished their chores silently instead of trying to play some fucking martyr, instead of trying to fix something that has always been broken.

“I heard what you said in that fucking washroom,” Touya cuts him off, eyes finally flashing to his face, jaw clenching twice as he glares at his baby brother. “Don’t you ever fill her head with that bullshit again, do you hear me?”

“She’s my step-sister, too,” Shouto shoots back, scrubbing turned needlessly aggressive, eyebrows set in a deep furrow as he glowers at the bowl in his hands.

“I don’t care,” Touya hisses. “Stay the hell away from her,”

Something massive, sharp and shiny catches his eye as he turns to deposit the clean dish on the drying rack, quivering hand hovering over it in hesitation. A butcher knife, gleaming in the dim, warm light of the kitchen, stuck halfway in the knife block.

Beside him, Shouto snorts, rolling his eyes and shaking his head in disgust as he looks back to his hands, rinsing the bowl under a stream of hot water and placing it on the towel-covered counter.

“What? You gonna stab me? Really? In front of mom on Christmas Eve? Were the bloody nose and the black eye and the split lip not enough for you?”

No, of course not; it will never be enough for Touya.

“Why not?” Touya asks, voice calm, sounding almost serene, for the first time tonight. “It’s not like she’d miss you. I’m the one she took with her when she left, aren’t I? I think we both know that mom loves me more than she loves you—isn’t that right, scarface,”

And that—that has Shouto freezing mid motion, hand halting under the flowing tap water, half rinsed glass still in his grasp. It takes a moment for the words to sink in, Touya watching him almost lazily, that annoying indifferent smirk finally forming on his lips, achingly familiar.

Heterochromatic eyes glaze over and Shouto swallows roughly, jaw clenching twice as he turns towards his eldest brother, the glass clutched in his sudsy hand squeaking as his grip tightens. And for a moment, Touya thinks he’s won, breath bated as he waits for that first tear to escape, to roll down Shouto’s unblemished cheeks and fall crashing to the floor.

But then Shouto’s rolling his shoulders once, twice, puffing his chest out just a touch as he straightens to his full height, nearly a full inch taller that Touya, and exhales forcefully through his nose.

“Y’know, if you loved her—I mean, if you really loved her—you’d let her go,” His voice is sharp, clear, ringing throughout the kitchen, ringing throughout Touya’s head, bouncing off the walls in his mind and reverberating. “What you have, what you’re feeling, isn’t love—it’s obsession.”

That infamous smirk begins to fall, cobalt eyes narrowing at his baby brother’s words, breath beginning to quicken. Shouto sees it then—that final crack in the mask Touya’s so painstakingly crafted, in the mask Touya so expertly worn for so many years—and he strikes.

“It’s possession.”

No. He doesn’t want to hear this, doesn’t need to hear this—it’s all lies, isn’t it? Touya tries to scoff, tries to roll his eyes and shake his head at such ridiculousness, but it feels like his body’s encased in ice, frozen straight to the core.

“It’s insecurity.”

Blood rushes in his ears, but it fails to drown out Shouto’s crisp voice, his words slicing straight through the white noise. Touya wants to tell him to stop, wants to tell him to shut the hell up, wants to silence him by driving that huge knife straight through his fucking chest, but his tongue is glued to the roof of his mouth, refusing to obey his brain as it shouts at it to fight back, goddamn it!

“I meant what I said to her in that washroom,” his younger brother spits, words dripping with hostility as his eyes narrow, giving Touya a once-over like he’s the most pathetic thing Shouto has ever laid eyes on. “She does deserve so much better than you and you fucking know it, but you’re too selfish to let her go. That isn’t love.”

And it’s those final three words that finally have the mask breaking into tiny fragments and falling away, revealing glassy sapphires and a twitching nose, a trembling chin and a hard swallow. It’s those final three words that have it shattering concurrently with the glass in Shouto’s hand, shards clattering to the tiled floor, smashing into smaller pieces upon impact.

It catches Fuyumi’s attention first, who had been on edge and observing the pair sharply, body coiled and ready to spring at the slightest hint of danger.

“Shouto, your hand!” she cries as she leaps up, eyes wide and trained on the blood oozing from Shouto’s palm, rushing down his arm and dripping off his elbow.

But neither of them break their stare, Shouto entirely numb to the pain, Touya entirely suffocated by it, molars grinding together as he tries in vain to stop his chest from stuttering. It isn’t until Fuyumi grabs Shouto by the shoulders and forces him to face her that their gaze is broken, the youngest finally looking down to find his palm stained with viscous crimson.

Frantic sapphire eyes dart around the room, something akin to panic clawing at Touya’s chest, tearing him open from the inside out and making each breath more painful than the next. He needs to go, he needs to leave, he needs to get the hell out of this kitchen, out of this house, needs to, needs to, needs…

Feet stumble a little as he rushes up the stairs, catching himself on the railing twice as he ascends to the top. Someone calls his name, he thinks, but he can barely hear it over the intense ringing in his ears, his vision fading in and out of focus. The door to your shared bedroom slams open, brass knob whacking off the drywall and leaving an ugly little hole not unlike the larger one Shouto’s head left in the living room wall the day before.

Startled and gasping, your book falls from your hands and tumbles to the floor as Touya barrels through the threshold, making a beeline for the nondescript chest of wooden drawers tucked into the corner, yanking it open and beginning to riffle through the neatly folded clothing.

It sounds like he’s muttering something to himself, but you can’t discern what it is, heart beginning to thud against your ribcage. The tufts of hair at the back of his neck are coated in sweat, sticking to the skin, his breathing harsh and uneven as a curse hitches in his chest, rapidly moving onto the next drawer when whatever he’s looking for doesn’t turn up in the first.

A potent mix of adrenaline and dread floods your veins, and for a moment you’re frozen, little fingers curled so tightly in the sheets under you it’s painful, breathing stopped as you watch your niichan urgently rummage through the second drawer, his back beginning to hiccup.

For a moment, you aren’t sure what the hell is going on, unblinking eyes watching his motions in some sort of daze. For a moment, you’re terrified he might be overdosing, frantically searching for—for—you don’t even know, for some sort of antidote Natsuo might’ve given him, or something.

But then, he chokes out a pathetic little half-sob, trying in vain to swallow it back down akin to the first night you spent at the cabin, and then you’re leaping off the bed and rushing towards him in alarm, wrapping your arms around him tightly from behind, and he just…breaks. Collapses against the wooden chest hard enough to make the entire thing wobble, burying his head in his folded arms as his entire body shudders under the force of the sob that tears through his chest.

“Niichan!” you gasp, pawing at the front of his shirt, trying to make him move to face you. “Niichan, niichan, what is it? What’s wrong?” your own voice breaks with the threat of tears as you speak, heart racing in your chest.

He doesn’t respond, merely turns in your embrace and collapses on you instead, face buried in the crook of your neck as he weeps, big juddering breaths that have his entire back convulsing.

The action surprises you, a stark contrast from his stubborn resistance from the first night, but it worries you, too, such surrender uncharacteristic of him.

But your body’s running on autopilot, immediately petting his hair as your other arm tightens around his waist, clutching him. Soft hushes fall from your lips as you hold him, rocking your bodies slightly as you whisper into ivory tufts; it’s okay, you’re there, it’s alright, you’ve got him, you love him.

And the sob that rips from his throat as those last few words leave your lips is nothing short of vicious, has him coughing wetly into your neck and whining a little, large hands curling in the material of your dress as he tries to pull you closer, closer, closer.

“Baby, please, tell me what’s wrong,” you beg and your voice cracks, blinking hard against the tears flooding your own eyes. “Tell me what’s wrong so I can help, please,”

He shakes his head, whimpering incoherently into your neck.

Can’t…Won’t…Pathetic…Disgusting…

“Please,” the word catches in your throat as tears finally escape your eyes, rolling down your cheeks in pairs. “Please, let me help, let me make you feel better,”

“I—I—I’m—” he tries, shaking his head again, but you urge him to continue, plead with him to try again. “Need to get out, n-need to—to make it stop,”

You aren’t sure what he means, but it doesn’t matter, body moving on pure instinct the moment the words are out of his mouth, little hand snatching the keys to the Audi off the surface of the dresser and dragging him along behind you.

❅ ❅ ❅

The road is empty, silent, entirely barren as the Audi weaves through it, fat snowflakes beginning to drift down from the wispy clouds that decorate the night sky, taking turns blanketing the full moon and softening it’s beams of ivory light.

You don’t drive very far. You haven’t a clue where you’re going, but it doesn’t matter, frenetic eyes searching for the first little secluded clearing you can pull into.

Touya is unsettlingly quiet, save for his soft sniffles and the gentle rustling of his clothing as he uses a sleeve to wipe at his nose. Hiccups are still catching in his chest, but he’s trying his hardest to stop them, to quiet them, growling a little in pure frustration each time one escapes. Your stomach churns uneasily at his muteness—you wish he would just say something, glancing over at him worriedly with your bottom lip sucked between your teeth, his sapphire eyes destitute, bloodshot and glassy as they stare indigently at his knees.

The small village that the cliff overlooks emits a warm glow of golden light, hovering hazily over it like a halo. Christmas lights are strung up on a few of the cabins, little glowing dots of red and green and blue lining the roofs. A dusting of snow has begun to collect, like gingerbread houses sprinkled with icing sugar.

Touya is still silent when you cut the engine, stays silent when you turn to peer at him from your spot in the driver’s seat, stays silent when you place a dainty hand on his bicep, rubbing soothing circles into the clothed muscle and sighing.

“Niichan,”

Nothing.

“Niichan, look at me,”

Nothing.

“Touya-nii,” you murmur, kicking off your boots and climbing over the center console into his lap, his arms immediately opening to embrace you. “What’s going on?”

His gaze still avoids yours, despite the fact that his hands are curling around your body, fingers digging into your flesh hard enough to make you wince, needing you close, closer. And his voice is so quiet, almost desolate as he answers.

“It’s nothing,”

Tender fingers tuck a tuft of alabaster behind his ear.

“It’s not nothing,”

“It doesn’t matter,”

Gentle lips place soft kisses along his jaw.

“It matters very much to me, niichan,”

“It’s—It’s stupid, fucking stupid,”

A small palm finds solace on his cheek, cupping it as a thumb strokes the skin.

“It’s not stupid if it’s hurting you, baby,”

Cobalt darts around the car, trying to look anywhere but at your face as sharp teeth sink into his bottom lip, an attempt to quell its quivering. A soft sigh leaves your lips as gentle hands cup his face, forcing his gaze to meet yours.

“Let me in,” you whisper, soft little thumbs caressing the ink under his eyes. “Let me help,”

Burning sapphire sears into your eyes, gaze penetrating and powerful as it shines with unshed tears, and you have to force yourself to not look away, to keep staring into those pools of gleaming blue, feeling as though you’re staring directly at the sun.

He doesn’t blink, but the tears collecting in his eyes become too many, too much, spilling over his lashline and cascading down inky cheeks, leaving little gleaming trails in their wake. He inhales deeply, holding the breath in his chest for a moment before exhaling slowly, the breath trembling.

“I don’t even know where to fucking start,”

And his voice is so low you nearly miss it, raw and hoarse and barely above a whisper.

“Take your time,” tiny fingers run through his hair again, his eyes closing with the motion, more tears dripping down his cheeks. “It doesn’t have to be complicated. Just…Tell me what’s bothering you,”

What is bothering him? It’s hard to say, not because it’s complicated, but because he doesn’t want to acknowledge it, doesn’t want to accept it, doesn’t want to admit that his baby brother’s words have affected him more than he ever thought they would.

If you really loved her…You’d let her go.

He does really love you, he wants to scream until his throat is sore, until his throat is bleeding, molars grinding at the thought of anyone thinking otherwise. He loves you so much, loves you too much, loves you more than he’s loved anything in his entire fucking life, he’s sure of it, positive of it.

He’s loved you since he first began stealing kisses from you, in the kitchen when mom wasn’t looking. He’s loved you since you tiptoed to his room, mumbling about a nightmare and seeking solace in his warm bed, in his warm arms. He’s loved you since you sobbed into his chest, that night you told him you wanted all of him, that night when he realized that you love him, too. He’s loved you since you let him permanently sear his name into your skin, branding you as his forever.

Yes, he’s possessive, and yes, he’s selfish, and yes, he can be a fucking asshole, but he does love you. Really loves you. He can barely remember his life without you in it, everything blurry and out of focus before you entered the frame. You’re all he’s got, all he’s ever had, all he ever wants, and the thought of you being unhappy, the thought of you wanting to leave, kills him, drives a large stake straight through his chest and clean out the other side, spearing him.

And yet, he fails to put any of these thoughts, running a mile a minute through his mind, into words. Patient as ever, you wait, petting his hair, planting kisses scattered across his face, tracing patterns on his skin as a war rages inside his head.

“I’m—It’s fucking pathetic,”

“It isn’t pathetic to be human, Touya,” you whisper sadly, little thumbs swiping across both cheeks. “You don’t have to keep it together every minute of every day,” you remind him gently, brushing his hair back from his forehead. “You’re allowed to be ‘weak’, too,”

He shakes his head, but refrains from arguing with you, because he can’t. Because he knows if he opens his mouth, if he tries to speak, he’ll start sobbing again. Sapphire tears away from your gaze, unable to hold your eyes anymore as his chin begins to quiver.

“I do really love you,” he whispers finally, head dropping, eyes squeezing shut against the prick of tears.

“I know you do, baby,” you say softly, fingers rubbing circles into his biceps, though he can hear the confusion laced in your voice.

“But do I—Do I des—”

He can’t. He can’t force those four simple little words out of his mouth, getting caught at the back of his throat, tangling into a giant ball that aches when he tries to swallow past it.

It’s starting again, that feeling from the kitchen, building in his torso, growing, stretching, higher and higher and higher until he can’t fucking breathe. A sharp gasp hitches painfully in his chest as he desperately tries to inhale, tries to suck an adequate amount of air into his lungs, coughing on the saliva pooling at the back of his throat.

“Do I—” the words escape his lips in a pitiful whine, voice cracking.

A sudden flash of blistering fury rips through his chest at his own cowardice. Disgust churns in his stomach, leaving a stinging bitterness lingering on his tongue, revolted at himself for getting so goddamn emotional over this, for letting Shouto’s words eat away at him, corrosive and parasitic as they take root in his brain, infecting his consciousness until it’s all he can fucking hear, think, see.

Tiny fingers find his face, hooking under his jaw and tilting it up, gently forcing him to look at you again. The pads of your fingertips dance along his skin, tracing along his jaw and then up his cheek to catch in the endless stream of tears.

You don’t say anything, because you don’t have to, tender little touches speaking volumes more than your words ever could, inspiring a bout of intense strength as he powers through the sentence, forcing the trembling words from his throat.

“Do I deserve you?”

And you’re so shocked by the question that your fingers halt, and his body stills, his breath stuttering in his throat, staring at you in an almost urgent manner, pleading with you to tell him the answer he’s so desperately seeking.

Salty water trickles over your thumbs, the sensation breaking you out of your reverie, response flowing from your mouth seamlessly, without a second thought.

“Of course you do,” your eyes search his face, studying his features slowly. “Where is this coming from?”

The question leaves your lips before you even know what you’re saying, but your voice is soft, kind, full of so much concern and affection as your fingers begin their ministrations again, tracing the ink decorating his cheeks.

He refuses to tell you, shakes his head as his lips press into a firm line, expression hardening. Blue fire ignites in his eyes, and you have your answer.

Shouto’s words from that first day in the washroom drift through your head, but you don’t press. Regardless of whether or not Touya had heard them on the twenty-first, it is fair to assume that Shouto must have said something along similar lines tonight, triggering this reaction.

Sighing, your expression softens, forehead falling forward to knock against his, hands still on either side of his face, keeping his gaze from escaping again as you speak.

“You—you’re sure?”

“Niichan, my niichan,” you murmur, pecking his lips in a chaste kiss. “That isn’t yours to decide, or Shouto’s to decide, or anyone’s to decide,” and your voice is so tender, filled with so much love as tiny fingers run through his hair, tension dissipating from his shoulders with each comb through. “It’s mine. And I’m telling you that you do deserve me,”

“Do I?” he chokes out brokenly, voice cracking and barely above a whisper. And the look on his face, azure eyes glazed with a thick shield of tears as they desperately search your face, chin trembling almost violently as he swallows a pitiful whine, pierces your heart; and you swear you can feel it shattering into a thousand little pieces, puncturing the surrounding organs and making your whole chest ache.

“Yes,” you whisper, tiny hands flexing on either side of his face as you grip him tighter, blinking rapidly to clear your own vision. “Yes,” you repeat, louder, stronger, fiercer, silencing whatever he was beginning to respond with by crushing your lips against his.

“Yes, yes, yes,” you’re murmuring between kisses, spit slicked lips sliding against his as he sobs into your mouth.

“I love you,” he mumbles against your lips, voice raspy with tears. “I love you, I love you,”

And, truly, you’re the only thing holding him together at this point—have been the only thing holding him together for a long time now. You’re the glue that keeps his life from falling apart, you’re the stitches that keep his very soul intact, sewing him back together each and every time he begins to unravel, keeping him complete, keeping him whole.

Fingernails dig into the skin of his cheek as you hold him in place, sucking his bottom lip into your mouth and nibbling, relishing in the quiet, broken moan you pull from him. A little tongue laps at the salty tears staining his cheeks, licks along his jaw as his hands grip the meat of your ass, trying to pull you closer as he breathes out your name.

“I love you,” you whisper, words punctuated by kisses down the column of his neck. “So much,”

A whine gets stuck in his throat, head tilting to allow you more access to move as large hands paw at the hem of your dress, rucking it up around your waist. Something pokes you, prods you, pushes up into you through the thick, rough denim of his jeans, and you inhale sharply, instantly consumed by overwhelming need—the need to feel him, hot and pulsing and driving into you, the need to make him feel better, to make him forget, to remind him that you’re his, and he’s yours, the need to be claimed.

It hits your like a fucking freight train, burns through your veins and shoots straight to your core, sharp spikes of heat that have you huffing out his name.

“I need you,” the words are whimpered against inky skin as you grind desperately against his hard cock, clawing at his chest, his biceps, his belt. “Niichan, I need you,”

“Yeah, baby?” he pants into your mouth, hands kneading your nylon covered thighs as he presses his clothed cock against your core, forcing a mewl of his name from your throat.

“Yes,” you cry pathetically, and it’s almost too much, the scalding, throbbing heat collecting between your thighs, hips gyrating in quick little circles as you try to alleviate some of the tension coiling tightly in the pit of your stomach. “Yes, yes, need you t-to fuck me, to—” a sharp gasp cuts you off as he bites into your shoulder, growling darkly against your skin. “—To fill me up, to remind me who I belong to,”

Strong, lithe fingers tear into your thin tights, hooking into the holes they create and ripping the delicate material. Dark eyes flit down, rabidly scanning your clothed little cunt, white lace soaked and stuck to you, outlining your folds. Touya chuckles, delivering a superficial slap with the back of his hand before pushing your panties to the side.

Niichan, niichan, you’re whining out the honorific, fingers tangling in his sweater and tugging roughly as his digits caress your slit, urgently shaking your head.

His lips tug down. “Baby, you know I—”

“No!” you pout, eyebrows knitted together, Touya’s eyes flashing dangerously at being so rudely cut off. “I don’t want your fingers, they aren’t enough,” Because the need to be filled, to be stretched, to be owned is almost voracious now, desire clawing at the pit of your belly. “Mark me, claim me, breed me, I-I’m yours,” you’re wailing, cunt achingly empty, the pulsing in your clit nearly too much to take.

A snarl rumbles in his chest, large hand snaking around your bent leg, wedging between your thigh and calve and gripping the back of your knee, hitching the leg closest to the center console up in one swift movement and planting your foot on the console box, thighs stinging from the sudden stretch.

One of your hands latches onto the handle above the door while the other clutches his shoulder, nails digging into the muscles through the knit of his sweater while he fiddles with his belt, squirming a little and shoving his jeans down to his knees.

Not a second is wasted as the head of his cock nudges against your fluttering hole, and then he stills. He wants you to beg, needs to hear you beg, and so you do, high-pitched and whiny as your hips instinctually wiggle.

“Please, niichan, please! Want it, need it, need you,”

And then he’s shoving himself into you, a hiss slipping from between your teeth, familiar, welcomed tears springing into your eyes, a guttural groan catching in his throat.

It stretches, aches, stings so good, so right, so perfect as he bottoms out, pressed snugly against your cervix, and pauses for a moment, cock twitching inside of you, strong hands on your hips preventing them from rocking forward and forcing you to just feel him for a second, every inch of him, buried deep inside you. The sigh that falls from your lips is nothing short of dreamy, mumbling about feeling whole again, and he chuckles.

Yeah, that’s right, princess. Only niichan’s cock can fill you up like this.

His thrusts start gradual, fingers flexing on your hips as they dig into the sensitive flesh, forcing you to slide nearly all the way off his cock before pushing you back down, hips pressing up to meet yours, cockhead grinding against your cervix as he stuffs himself in your cunt, gaining a little more speed with each motion.

No one but niichan could ever make you feel like this.

The words are whimpered between fierce, messy kisses, between ravenous, devouring kisses, between the clacking of teeth and the slurping of tongues, glistening saliva, sticky and sweet and laced with the taste of blue fire and Marlboros dripping off your chin.

And he needs to hear it—needs to know that you belong to him and only him, needs to know that you want him and only him, needs to know that only he is deserving of you, worthy of you—so you tell him, in breathy little whines, that no, no one could ever make you feel this good; yes, niichan’s the only one that can fill you up this fully, this wholly, this rightly, eyes rolling back and sharp cries echoing through the car as he pounds into you, deep little grunts falling from his lips in time with each snap up of his hips.

“Tell niichan—ah, fuck—tell niichan how badly you need his cum,”

Senseless babbling flows freely from your lips the instant he asks for it, forever incapable of disobeying a direct order from him—please niichan, need your cum so bad, need to feel it in my belly, need to feel it in my brain, please, give it to me, give it to me, give it to me!

“Christ,” he chokes out, hips beginning to falter, muscles bulging and tensing as he forces you to keep bouncing on him, hard and fast and deep. “Cum with me, baby,” he nearly begs, voice more wrecked than you’ve ever heard it before, inspiring a whole flock of butterflies in your tummy. “Be a good girl and make a—make a mess all over niichan’s cock,”

And it’s the sense of desperateness, of urgency, of sheer neediness sown deep into his broken voice that has you spasming around him, that evokes an orgasm so intense it makes you choke on your own scream as it slashes through you, gurgling on spit and tears as violent tremors course through your body.

Hot, thick spurts of cum fill you, your name escaping his lips in a cracked whine, his hips continuing to lazily roll against yours as you milk him for every drop of cum he’s got, as you beg him for more, more, more.

Overwhelmed by emotion, you collapse against his heaving chest, hiccupping out pitiful little sobs between your harsh breathing, and he hushes you, fingers petting your sweaty hair as he murmurs against your scalp—shh, it’s alright, he’s here, he loves you, you’re his, and you did so well.

“Do you want to leave?” the question is uttered softly, after your breathing has calmed to tiny sniffles, voice so genuine it’s almost painful, curled up in his arms as your bare cunt presses against his pelvis, cum still leaking out of you. “Just say the word and we’ll go, baby,”

Swallowing thickly, he’s silent for a moment, considering. Patiently, you wait, nuzzling comfortingly against his neck and licking at the sweat pooled in the dip of his collarbone. When he speaks, his voice is low and rough, laced with a hint of disbelief.

“Really?”

You pull back to gaze at him.

“Yes, really,” you whisper, catching a tear with the pad of your thumb and placing a soft kiss against his cheek. “You are more important to me than anyone else in that damn cabin by far, and I don’t care if it upsets them—if you want to leave, if you need to leave, we’ll leave. Say the word, and I’ll drive back, pack our shit, and we’ll be gone. You don’t even need to get out of the fucking car,”

Shining sapphire eyes study your face intently, searching for any sign of hesitancy, finding nothing but sincerity.

“I love you so much,” he laughs wetly, more glistening tears escaping his eyes with the motion. “So fucking much,”

Tingling warmth blossoms in your chest at his words, at his laugh, conjuring a watery smile of your own as you pepper his face with kisses, soft lips ghosting across his cheeks, his nose, his eyelids and forehead until he becomes too impatient, large hands cupping your jaw and pressing your wandering lips against his.

Giggles erupt from your throat, and he’s sure that’s what liquid sunshine sounds like, allows the noise to wash over him, to bathe him in your everlasting light, to warm him to his very core. A little tongue darts out to lick teasingly along the seam of his lips, evoking an involuntary smile of his own before his tongue escapes to meet yours, another precious squeal of laughter echoing through the car.

Yes, he thinks, as your laughter vibrates against him, arms tightening around your waist as he cradles you against his chest. This is what love feels like.

#dabi x reader #dabi smut #todoroki touya x reader #todoroki touya #dabi #AAAAAAAH okay #this made me cry lol #idk if it'll make u cry but it made me cry #anyway merry christmas eve i love u lots!! <33 #tw pseudo-incest

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rainywritingsx · 4 years

Text

hcs: Bakugou and Todoroki on their wedding with reader

request:Hey angel! May I ask for wedding HC for Bakugou x reader and Todoroki x reader? Like, how its gonna be the wedding, if they're nervous or excited, etc.. thank you in advance ♡♡

I had so so much fun writing this honestly, it’s so cute. and also,,, made me feel more single than i already did lolol, but I still enjoyed it! I hope you think so too. Soooo have fun reading!!

xxx Damla

If you enjoy my work and would like to give a tip, feel free to buy me a coffee!

warnings: some swearing and mention of being drunk (everyone is of age here)

Bakugou Katsuki

this guy totally wants to be involved in planning the wedding

hiring a wedding planner? Hell no, we’re doing this together

you bet he will make time to look for places to hold the wedding, to try out wedding cakes, look for decorations etc

as i’ve mentioned so many times, Bakugou doesn’t half-ass anything so he will do anything to make the wedding perfect

he lets you choose of course, but Bakugou makes sure that you’ve looked at as many available options as possible

it might be tiring, but he means well

now, onto the wedding itself

bakugou is s t r e s s e d

he gets up even earlier than usual

I don’t think he’s that traditional so he doesn’t really care about not seeing you before the wedding etc

so if y’all live together and you aren’t keen on traditions either, the morning will be spent with him

best jeanist tried to do his hair and bakugou ONLY tolerated it because you asked if he could have his hair done for the wedding

but

poof

it’s back to its natural state

throughout the day the bakusquad is teasing him but also hyping him up once he’s in his suit

literally doesn’t care whether you wear a suit or dress, you are beautiful to him either way

will definitely want to match somehow

if you wear a suit, your ties will match and if you wear a dress, he will try to either match with your jewelry or with your bouquet

he’s hella nervous once he’s finally done and waiting for you

he’s not scared you’ll suddenly run off, of course not. Bakugou will definitely think deeply about it first before proposing to you, so logically he knows it’s all fine

but a part of him still feels nervous

and he can’t wait to see you walking down the aisle.

and then the doors open

he sees you

and wow

no joke I can totally see him tearing up at the sight of you

like wow he’s getting married

btw the wedding will be kinda small, at the wedding you will find 1-A, both your families and definitely Aizawa bc he’s a proud dad too

As you’re making your way towards him he just thinks to himself ‘holy shit i’m so fucking blessed’

Once you finally arrive and hold hands, he will not stop making eye contact the whole time

He doesn’t even have to tell you how amazing you look and how happy he is, his eyes tell you everything

as he says his vows, you hardly notice his voice weavering a bit

and you just smile and squeeze his hand

probably isn’t a big fan of taking pictures

but he will take a few for you and your and his parents

at first he refuses to dance

will slow dance with you if you reaaally want him to

if you feed him wedding cake baby will be f l u s t e r e d

but he secretly likes it heheh

and

if for some reason he ends up drunk, he will be on the dance floor for the rest of the night lmao

good luck with him

as for the honeymoon

he will take days off for you

which he probably won’t do often so that shows how special you are

overall it’s just a lovely wedding that you won’t forget

Todoroki Shouto

Todoroki doesn’t necessarily feel the need to plan everything of the wedding

If you ask for his opinion, he will tell you what he thinks of course

If you ask him to come along with you to look for decorations, he will happily join but he may be a little lost

doesn’t really have anything specifically he adores

as long as you love it, it’s all good, that’s what matters to him

I can even see him asking for your opinion on what suit to get

“Baby, those two suits are the same.

“No, this one is darker.”

uwu protect him

overall he just seems super chill about the whole thing

he probably has attended some weddings with his family before, but never paid much attention since most of those weren’t relatives

so he doesn’t know much about them but todo will definitely do some research because he wants it to be perfect

if you want to do a traditional wedding that’s okay and the same goes for incase you don’t want that

the wedding will be small, with some family members of his and a few friends as well as your own family

tbh i don’t see him inviting Endeavor, even if he tries to become better

maybe he will consider it if his mother really wants him to, but if not, he won’t

i’m going with the dabi is a todoroki theory bc why not so

let’s say he’s in contact with his brother now and even invited him

he might not come (he’s a villain dude) but he may visit before or after the wedding uwu

nowww let’s go to the wedding day

here is where he slowly loses his chill

almost burns his suit on accident

he starts to feel a lot more nervous now and a bit worried

what if he messes up or forgets his vows?

what if he gets too nervous and accidentally uses his quirk?

Or, the worst of all, what if you run away?

Midoriya assures him that that won’t happen, but something in Todoroki still worries

and once the doors open, and he sees you walk down the aisle, his eyes tear up

he just loves you so much

you’ve helped him through so many hardships and he’s more thankful than ever for that

when you arrive and grab his hands, he will whisper how wonderful you look with glossy eyes

his vows will be very personal to the point that it has everyone in tears

definitely wants to slow dance with you

I feel like Todoroki thinks about this even more because of his experience with his father, and because he saw how he was towards his mother

he will do anything to show you his love and to make you happy

he might try dancing to more upbeat music, but I feel like he will be a bit stiff and awkward

but baby tries his best uwu

he loves the wedding cake

also I don’t think he’s the type to take pictures either

but his family totally wants to so he complies

in hindsight he’s glad because that way you can keep these memories

definitely takes you on an amazing honeymoon

and this marks the beginning of a new chapter in your relationship

#bakugou x reader #todoroki x reader #bnha x reader #bakugou headcanons #todoroki headcanons #bakugou katsuki x reader #todoroki shouto x reader #bakugou katsuki x you #todoroki shouto x you #BNHA Headcanons #mha x reader #mha headcanons #bnha #mha

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milliumizoomi · 3 years

Text

Not the same

Pairings: Bakugou x GN! Reader

Warnings: Feeling Lost for Bakugou, cursing, Angst, Angst and more angst.

A/n: I was actually really excited to write this cuz at times I just CRAVE angst

You sat in the dark room, tied to a chair with ropes made of metal secured around your wrists and feet. There was also duct tape on your mouth to prevent you from saying anything or perhaps using your quirk. Next to you was the hotheaded ash blonde as he was knocked out on the chair next to you, bound the same way you were. You knew you had liked the boy for the way he was driven to become the best but you never said a word of it to anyone, not even your closest friends.

You both had gotten kidnapped while you were on a trip with the class, although this is Bakugou’s second time. ‘Ugh.. this sucks.. I hope the teachers and our friends come save us..’ you thought. You knew it would make no difference in your tried to wiggle out of the ropes because you had already tried and in return, the ropes sent an electric shock through your body so you didn’t run the risk of doing it again. The door to the room you were in then busted open and the ash blonde boy next to you jolted up at the sound. ‘He heard that..’ you said to yourself. “MMM! MFPHH!” Bakugou attempted to scream but they were muffled by the duct tape. “Aha! Look who decided to wake up..” Shigaraki said menacingly. You both narrowed your eyes at him. “Aww.. no need to get hostile.. tell you what, me and the rest of the league will come back in a few minutes then we can get this started..” he grinned evilly and said as he left and shut the door behind him. You rolled your eyes at him as he left. What he didn’t know was that your friends had managed to find where you guys were really quickly and were making their way into the building to save you.

About three minutes pass and suddenly you and Bakugou see shadows fly by each of you. You both get taken aback. Bakugou was ready to start making noise. “Shhh we’re here to get you free!” Kirishima whispered. But you then realize that he was faced to Bakugou. You brushed it off, thinking that it was just because they’ve known each other longer. But you turn to realize your friends since childhood stood there as well but they were also looking directly at Bakugou, not even sparing you a glance. You eyebrows furrow at this. The room was then filled with all the students trying to get the ropes of Bakugou and then Bakugou’s muffled screams.

You just sat by and waited, thinking that they would eventually tend to you.. but things took a turn and you realized it but didn’t want to accept it. “Ow! Ugh you bastards.. why’d you even come here?!” Bakugou yelled at he ripped the duct tape off his mouth and whisper-yelled to classmates while twisting his joints. “We came to save you Bakugou!” Your best friend for years said to him. You looked up at them bewildered. Were they not going to help you? You were confused. And then they did the worst thing they could’ve done.

They started to leave. And they left you as you were.

You wanted to cry. You never expected them to do this to you. You started making a flurry of noise and muffled screams to alert them that you were there too. But they just ignored you and continued to escape. None of them looked back. Not Midoriya, Not Uraraka, Not Kaminari, Not Iida, Not Todoroki, Not Kirishima, hell not even the so called “friends” you’ve had since childhood... or even Bakugou. They all just began escaping without even caring about you.

You were making frustrated screams and rocking the chair back and forth. Everyone began jumping out of the hole in the wall that they had initially came through to get to Bakugou. Of the last to go was your “best friend”. She turned and looked at you dead in your face. You gave her pleading eyes, silently begging her to save you. She just turned away and jumped out of the hole. They knew you were there.. they apparently just didn’t care.

You held your head down as you realized that you now had no one..

Not your parents, not your teachers, and not even the “friends” you claimed to have. A couple minutes after they all jumped and were apparently out of the area, the door swung open to reveal the league. They all stopped at the door as their eyes widened. Their eyes went from the hole in the wall, to you, to the the discarded chair next to you. They then began to connect the dots. “Damn.. that’s low.. especially for them..” Dabi says as he scratched the back of his head. The villains actually felt bad for you. Yes they kidnapped you for the intent to do some bad things to you but when they realized that Bakugou got rescued and you got left behind, they felt disgust. Not even them would abandon one of their own.

Toga walked up to you and crouched down to you to realize that tears were coming down your cheeks and rolled off the duct tape but there was no expression on your face. “Hey..” Toga said softly. You looked up at her. “You feel abandoned don’t you..?” she asked. You nodded with no emotion. “Then how would you like to join us..? We won’t leave you.. I promise.” She said. You stilled, not knowing whether or not you should do it. They realized you pondering over the invitation.

Shigaraki then chimed in. “Tell you what.. we’ll free you ONLY if you promise not attack us or escape!” He said. You nodded. At this point, you knew you had nothing to lose or anywhere to go so you agreed. Twice freed you and you got up and stretched and ripped the duct tape off of your mouth. “Ouch! That hurt!” You exclaimed as you rubbed your lips. “Follow us” Shigaraki said as he and the rest of the league turned on their heels and walked out of the room with you following close behind.

You spent the night with them and they actually made you feel a little better. But there was still a giant hole in your heart of where your love for UA and your friends was. And it was slowly filling with hatred. “Hey.. Toga?” You called out to Toga. “Hmm? Yes L/N?” She responded. “ I accept your invitation..” you said as you turned to her and grinned. The entire league perked up and smiled evilly at this. “Welcome to the League of Villains then L/N” Shigaraki said. You smiled back menacingly. “Glad to be here.. UA is never going to be the same to me.. after what happened today, I don’t trust a single one of those bastards..!” You said darkly. “And that my friend, is the type of society we’ve been trying to show the world.. but don’t worry I can tell you’ll fit in great here.. and we have the perfect job for you..” Shigaraki responded to you as the rest of the league responded with sounds of agreement. This.. was the start of your new life with a new family that vowed to never leave you.. your life of villainy.

Months later, everyone at UA was going out on with their day normally. They were going to class, eating lunch and practicing as such. No one even remembered about you. Your ex best friend, when asked where you were, lied to all the teachers saying that you left on your own free will. There was no one else around to witness so the rest of your class never heard these conversations. Right now, class was going to be over in a couple minutes and lunch was next. When the bell rung, all the students got out of their classes and made their way to the cafeteria. The hallways were now empty.

Perfect.

With help from Kurogiri, you went from the LOV base to the empty hallway. “Thank you ‘Giri!” You said as you stuck your head back through the warp gate. Kurogiri patted your head gently and told you to go. You nodded and started to skip through the hallway as the warp gate closed.

In the cafeteria, everyone was being all happy or whatever and it made you sick to your stomach. ‘To think I actually liked this place full of fakes and wannabes’ you thought as you rolled your eyes. You strolled through the doorway, and by first glance, on one could even tell that you were a villain.. but they’d find out soon enough. You walked past a table and picked up an apple a student had and took a bite out of it. You then tossed it back over your head and back to the student. This made the student angry as he got up to call you out.

“HEY! Who do you think you are?!” He screamed. You turned back around to face him with your eyes glowing. All of a sudden, the student couldn’t speak anymore. It was like the inside of his throat was completely destroyed as he also began to cough up blood. Everyone witnessed this happen but no one knew it was you because you just walked away and no one realized you. ‘These hoes haven’t changed a bit.. never realized me in my time of need.. ever!’ Thoughts like these kept running through your head as you then decide to make your presence known.

You ran and got up one of the tables. “Hey heroes!” You yelled. At the sound of your voice, everyone stilled and looked at you. “How’s it going?” You asked. Your ex best friend’s eyes widened at the sight of you. How were you not dead? She was sure those villains were gonna kill you.. unless..

As she thought about these things, your former teacher, Mr. Aizawa called out to you. “L/N? What are you doing here? Shouldn’t you be at your new school?” New school?? What? You stood up there confused. “What the hell are you talking about?” You asked. Everyone was taken back at the sound in your voice but brushed it off as the conversation continued. “Your new school. Ex BSF/N said that you moved schools” Mr. Aizawa said. At the mention of her name, she perked up. She was starting to get nervous.

“OH?! Did she?! You don’t say..” you replied as you looked her dead in her face. “Well.. I’ve started a new line of work I guess.. telling from what happened with that kid over there that’s still throwing up blood.. AYE! Get over it!” You said as you looked at the kid who’s was at the verge of death by your hand. Everyone’s blood ran cold as they looked at the kid who was dying from blood loss. “SOMEONE GET RECOVERY NOW!!” Aizawa yelled.

“L/N WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?!” Bakugou then got up and blurted out. “Shut up before I kill you..” you replied as cold as ice. Everyone froze. “Oh and you don’t get to refer to me by that name anymore..” you continued you looked away. “WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!” Your ex best friend yelled. You looked at her with such a cold look she could be frozen. “What’s wrong with me?” You laughed menacingly. “Oh so what?! You can leave me in the hands of villains and expect me to come back and be buddy buddy with you?!” You blurted out.

Everyone’s faces paled. Left.. with villains?? Everyone was silent. “Oh so now none of you have nothing to say huh?!” You screamed. “I hate all of you.. Kirishima, Midoriya, Uraraka, Todoroki, Kaminari and even Iida.. you lowlifes claim to be heroes but left your classmate behind in the hands of villains.. you make me sick!” You stated. “And then to top it off.. the person I was kidnapped with left me and my so called childhood friends did too.. some heroes you are” you continued as you put your hand on your face. “You WHAT?!” Aizawa yelled. The kids felt ashamed of themselves. In truth, all except your best friend had forgotten to come back for you. They knew they shouldn’t have ignored you though. But your best friend remembered about you but chose to lie about you’re whereabouts.

“See? Assholes.. none of you deserve the term hero!” You said. “You’re so ashamed of yourself because you got caught.. pathetic.” You continued. They all held their heads down. Someone one went to say something to you again but you turned to them, eyes glowing as you destroyed the inside of their throat too.

Everyone was shocked. “Bastard.. why?” Bakugou said. You looked at him and smiled evilly. “Isn’t it obvious? I’m against heroes now.. so to put it in short.. I’m a villain” you said while laughing at him. “You did this to me.. to think I even liked you.. ugh” you continued as you rolled your eyes. ‘They liked me..?’ He thought. He went to say something until another student jumped up to grab you. They held on tightly to you. You didn’t even budge. You just leaned over and whispered in their ear. “Die..” Then just like that, the student dropped to the floor with you looking at their body with no emotion. “Shouldn’t have touched me..” you said. Everyone was shocked. They knew your quirks but they never thought there’d be a day when you’d use them like that.

Your quirks were pierce and control. Pierce allows you to look at a person and cause damage to any part of the person’s body at any degree you want. Control works somewhat like Shinsou’s quirk but the difference is you don’t have to ask a question to take control of the person. As long as the person is touching you or makes eye contact with you then your able to control them.

Aizawa went into hero mode as he erased your quirk and stared to charge at you. “GET EVERYONE OUT HERE NOW!” He screamed. You began dodging him with ease because you know all his moves having trained with him a lot in the past.

“Well.. looks like I’m done here..” you yawned. You flipped onto the top of the the food serving section in the cafeteria as a warp gate opened behind you. “It’s been fun.. oh and the names V/N and I’m the new member of the LOV!” You stated as the rest of the league emerged through the warp gate. “Thanks for the new asset to our group. They make a great team player.” Shigaraki says as he grins. “Aww.. thanks Shiggy” you said.

You turned back to the student and the heroes who were glaring and shocked by all of this. “Thanks for opening my eyes.. It’s all your fault.. so thanks to you~” you said in a sing song voice. “Let’s go.” Dabi said as he turned back to the warp gate. “Ok! Bye everyone~” you and Toga said in unison as you all went through the gate.

You turned back for a second as said “Its all thanks to you that I’m not the same.” Then walked into the warp gate.

As you disappear the words you said rang through everyone’s head like a loud bell. The words that stuck with them the most was “It’s all your fault..” and “Its all thanks to you that I’m not the same.” This was a blow to UA, a blow to their hearts.. and a blow to their mentality. Physically, they lost 3 students that day but mentally they lost 4.

And while they beat up themselves and grieved over what happened, you went on to live a life of evil and hatred.. all thanks to UA high.

Tagging: @nathaslosttheirshit @dragonsdreamoffire @uniquabackyardigans @kiribis-confesion-page @unfazedrose @haikyu-whore (Open ! Click here to be added!)

A/n: I wrote this when I saw the post @nathaslosttheirshit made so this was their idea.

Also this is like my first G/N fic.

#{📝}—a.scribbles #bakugou angst #bakugou x reader #feelings lost #hero turned villain #bakugou x y/n #bakugou #leauge of villians #bnha x reader #bnha bakugou #bakugou imagine #bakugou oneshot

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todourouki · 3 years

Text

IT’S YOU.

♡ dabi todoroki

SUMMARY he hates to express himself but it’s now or never.

WORD COUNT 2.9K

WARNINGS angst, someone d*es sorry lol, fluff, sorry i miss dabi & i had to, also a suggestive joke cause it’s dabi

AUTHORS NOTE this is kinda trash cause i’m just warming up again lol <3 also it’s unedited lol sorry ly guys

** italics signify a flashback

Everything went to shit.

Nothing could be heard through your ears other than the large explosions and cries for help, flames of red and blue illuminating your face through the porcelain glass.

You should be out there. You should be fighting with everyone, trying to save the planet from the complete destruction and cataclysmic hurricanes of utter civil war.

Instead, you found yourself trapped within the walls of the practical prison cell, encaged within nothing but glass on the highest building in your current prefecture. You couldn’t remember when it happened, how it happened, how you get there, where it started— nothing.

All you could remember though, was yesterday morning. And as the flames began to grow closer in proximity to you, all you could do was think about him.

“Dabi, if you keep touching me with your cold ass feet I promise I’ll call the police and turn you in.” He could hear the irritation in your voice, doing nothing but chuckling and pulling you closer into his bare chest.

“You wouldn’t dare, you know that.”

His voice was soft for the first ever time, the sign of sleepiness still lingering behind his tongue as he lingered the ends of his words. The warmth of the winter sun hit your bodies through your shades, and you found yourself opening your eyes and doing something you rarely got the chance to do— admire Dabi.

He usually expressed his hatred for his appearance. It usually ranged from the two-toned colors loitering his body, the staples holding him together, to even the simplest of things such as his hands being too weak or his weight not being strong enough.

Everything he ever complained about though, were things you found yourself falling deeper and deeper inlove with as the days progressed. The sunlight hit his skin softly, the white duvet perched across his shoulders showing that he at least got cold even though he felt like a human radiator.

“You’re so pretty.” Your simple words silently slipped, his ears perching up in his sleep but his scowl remaining against his monotonous face.

You knew he liked it though, from the way his fingers heated up just a tad bit and caused you to blush for him. He wasn’t a friend of admitting the way he felt, giving out compliments whether they be true or not, or doing anything remotely close to giving you any kind of affection that wasn’t physical. You knew this tough, from the moment you got yourself involved with someone like him.

You knew that getting into Dabi’s life and lingering around meant that your life would permanently be in danger, would never be the same, and would never be safe. You knew all of this, yet you never batted an eye on whether or not you wanted to deal with it for as long as you lived— you knew you would die for him if he’d ask you to.

Sometimes you thought of saying those three words you knew scared him. They almost slipped more than a few times, and it was Dabi that prevented you from doing so by doing things such as changing the conversation topic and reaverting your attention towards anything, absolutely anything else.

To tell the truth, you were scared of admitting it to him as well. Dabi was a criminal, and not just any criminal, but thee criminal of the hour. He was plastered all over Tokyo with nothing but a mugshot taken when he was about two years younger and a life sentence he refused to give in to. You knew what would happen if news got out that you had invested your time with someone like him.

You would potentially lose your family, everything you’ve ever worked for, your job, you’d lose it all. It never bothered you though, because you’d do anything for him. Anything.

And as you felt the words begin to form from the bottom of your throat, you realized those cerulean eyes were now staring back at you. It was almost as if the world didn’t exist when you were with him, and you would give anything to be able to say those words. Anything just to show him your devotion for him, and how you would kill or be killed for him.

Like clockwork, the opportunity fell from your hands and onto the ground like shattered glass when you felt him peck your cheek with something hidden in his irises. “Let’s get out of bed, yeah?”

Tears fell from your eyes, silent whimpers growing louder as you realized what was happening. Your feet began to ache, body spiraling down in pain with nothing but heartbreak racing through your veins.

You hadn’t seen Dabi since that morning, the chaos only growing the minute he slipped through your apartment door and not bothering to call, text, or even see you.

The world was ending, and you never got the chance to tell Dabi you were in love with him.

You knew everything was coming to an end. He had warned you things were only growing worse, heroes and villains alike reaching a point so desperate in finishing the war, they’d both resort to anything. And that anything, was currently demolishing the streets in front of your own eyes.

The blue flames only grew in damage, covering towers of glass and growing closer in proximity into the glass bubble you were stuck behind. You were the only person up there, being led to safety by a hero much too young to be in such a situation and bringing you to even more tears.

You wanted to scream— cry for anything or anyone to help you so you could just get out and look for him. It’s all you wanted, to just hold him once more and feel his snide remarks slap you hot against your skin one last time.

“Hey dollface.”

The voice you heard forced your breath to cave in, voice being numb from the tears falling earlier enough to where all you could do was turn and feel your heart break even more.

He was missing a few staples, a bullet wound pressed against his white shirt near his torso and his body seeming weaker than you’d ever seen it. His hair was disheveled more than usual, coat missing, and skin beginning to detach itself from his thin frame. His face was tired, voice wavering from pain and exhaustion and you felt your body freeze.

“Dabi?” Your voice was sweet to him, music to his ears finally being played at a lesser pressure to where if tears could fall down his eyes, they would.

He had searched everywhere for you, ignited the streets in flames looking for anyone that knew of your whereabouts no matter who or what they were. He saw your weak frame run towards the end of the glass he stood on the opposite side of and his body limped closer to you.

If only you could see how much it hurt him to not be able to hold you, looking at you cry and mourn through glass hurting him more than he thought anything ever had. He knew it was his fault for getting so attached as for involving you in this mess. It was his to clean up but he let you help him and manage to self destruct your future quicker than he could stop you.

“Missed me?” His smirk was lazy as usual, but weak enough to falter as his head knocked across the glass and held its eyesight on you.

You were crying, not being able to stop yourself from leaning against the glass right with him and he couldn’t say it hurt him any less than it did. It fucking killed him to see you like this. He knew he couldn’t break through the glass without killing you, and he knew you couldn’t break the glass unless the hero who surrounded you in it was there. And he had never wanted to kill someone more than he wanted to kill that guy— not even his own father.

“Please tell me you’re okay.” You whimpered, hands flat across the glass as your chest heaved up and down in nothing but pain.

Dabi heard them getting closer from a distance, the sound of screams beginning to crowd his ears and preventing him from hearing to your voice so clearly. He knew he had to say something- he had to do something if he wanted to have time to do it before the end.

“Don’t worry about me, just do me a favor and listen alright?” His voice held the usual attitude it did when you’d speak to him, the pain growing more and more noticeable as he started to wince after each growing syllable.

You always listened to him, and as much as you wanted to scream at him to get you out of there so you could just feel your skin on his, you knew it wasn’t the time yet. His hands slowly raised towards yours on the glass, something he would have never done under any other circumstance other than this one and you knew. You knew what he was doing.

“I love you,” the words fell flatly, echoing through your brain as you sucked in air and watched as blood began to drip from the hand falsely holding yours across the glass, “I fucking love you.”

“I don’t know what to do with myself if I’m not waking up next to ya’, or what to do if I’m not laying with ya’, but I know what I’m gonna have to do now if it means you get to get out of here okay.”

Your eyebrows furrowed, your posture straightening and beginning to panic. “Dabi, what the fuck are you talking about?”

You saw him squeeze his eyes shut, blood growing against his eyelids and starting to trickle down his burned cheeks. The air you once knew how to breathe without thinking started to slip through your lungs faster than you could catch up, and you knew you were living out your worst nightmare.

The screams Dabi had been waiting for grew, footsteps flying up the stairs behind him growing in sound and he knew time was limited. He knew he needed to do this now or he’d never get a second chance.

“I’m doing this to save you, so don’t think I’m doing this to find an excuse to get your annoying ass out of my life.” His words caused you to sob, air leaving your lungs as your dainty hands slammed across the unbreakable glass.

“Shut the fuck up! Don’t you fucking DARE!” Your words hit him hard, nothing but a small smirk lifting against his lips and staring back at you with blood streaming eyes.

“You know I have to, even if I don’t wanna. So listen good. In about three seconds, those guys are gonna slam through the door and kill me and I’m gonna let them.”

“I’m gonna let them do to me what they should’ve done a long time ago if it meant I got to give ya’ a better chance at life so it’s what I’m doing, okay? I’m giving you a chance to do some shit you couldn’t do with me sticking around.”

Dabi’s words burned through your ears and you knew nothing hurt you more than this. The pain of smacking against the glass only caused bruises to form against your knuckles. You wanted to keep hitting, to keep fighting, and to keep doing whatever you possibly could’ve done if it meant you’d get to hold him and stop him from being so fucking stupid. But this was a fight that was already won, and it’s what hurt you the most.

“You’re the most beatiful shit I’ve ever seen in my life. You make the best fucking French toast I’ve ever had, and your lips are better to me than any fucking weed I’ve ever smoked in my life.” The footsteps grew louder, and he knew this was all he could say before it was over.

“I never told you cause I was a fucking pussy but right now I’m facing death and nothing could be worse than this. I fucking love you, Y/N. I love you and you’re the greatest thing to ever happen to me. Maybe if I wasn’t a criminal about to die I woulda married ya’ with a ring I stole from Shig but I am.”

You watched something glimmer from his fingertips, the sight causing your breath to get stuck between your throat and hold itself longer than you could handle. He was going to propose to you.

Within seconds, the door slammed open and there stood police officers with guns and weapons piling through. They were yelling, and you knew you should’ve been listening to their words but all you could do was stare at the ring Dabi dropped underneath his foot and hid beneath his shoe.

“They’re gonna kill me and I’ll never be able to feel you against me again, but know that nobody in this world will ever make me feel the way I do or did with you. Do something with your life while I’m gone, dollface.”

That’s all he could say before turning his body around, giving you one last view of his arrogant smirk before trying to shoot his arm out to give himself one last method of defense. The only problem was that he didn’t stand a chance. You couldn’t watch, knowing that if you did you’d lose your mind more than you were going to eventually anyway so you blinked.

You blinked for a really long fucking time, long enough to slip down the glass with your hands following the trail of blood Dabi’s hands left as his lifeless body rested against the cage holding you in.

You couldn’t hold him, you couldn’t smell him, you couldn’t even tell him you loved him back. He never gave you the chance to say it, and when he finally admits it to you, his body loses every inch of life it was granted before you were even given the chance.

You wanted to hate him, but you couldn’t. You couldn’t find it within yourself to do anything other than weep and sob Dabi’s name like a mantra. Because this was it. You were there when he took his last breath to finally admit he loved you and you couldn’t even say it back, without the chance of ever saying it again.

You’d lost him, and couldn’t even try to save him from his own self.

Dabi’s body rested on top of yours, head nuzzled between the crevice of your breasts and breath pattering against your exposed nipples as you both lay there speaking of nothing but nonsense. That was, at least until he cleared his throat and began to rub his warm hands against your waist.

“You wanna know something, Y/N?” He muttered, causing you to giggle softly and run a hand through his raven hair.

“What, Dabi?” The snow falling outside was louder than it had ever been before, the silence after you replied consuming you so strongly and so loudly you would’ve been concerned if it wasn’t for him opening his mouth yet again.

“When all this shit ends,” his staples clicking and deep voice was the only thing circling against the room, taking a second to think and finally finding his voice once again, “I think I’m gonna take you out on a date.”

The laugh that left your lips was one that made Dabi smile, playfully glaring up at you with an eye and joining you in a slight chuckle. Dabi usually said stupid flirtatious remarks like this, but hearing him offer to take you out on a date was beyond anything you’d ever heard.

“Oh really? Where are we gonna go, lover boy?” Your hands continued to run itself through his hair, words tickling at his scalps and making him relax even more into your body’s sanctuary,

“Anywhere else. As long as I got your dumbass with me.”

The words rang deep, your hand stopping slightly and cheeks burning more as the words echoed through your head. He wasn’t one for romantics or for sappy comments but this one hit a bit deeper than it probably should have for you. You knew it took a lot for him to say, being well aware of his faux emotional aloofness to really just cover up the fact that he’s an undercover softy.

“Simp.” Translated in Y/N’s language: I love you.

“Don’t be such a bitch about it.” Translated in Dabi’s language: I love you, more.

Silence covered your ears once more, nothing but flashing Tokyo lights illuminating through to it window with snowflake shadows dancing across your white walls. Moments of peace like this were rare, especially with Dabi being in your bed with you for as long as he pleased.

You appreciated moments like these the most, his body weight fitting like a puzzle on top of yours. You both continued to crack a few jokes, talking about nothing and everything at the same time until someone (most likely you, honestly) fell asleep with a small smile imprinted on the two of you.

You know moments like these were only the beginning of your relationship, and you knew you’d do anything for Dabi to make sure you got to show him how much you appreciated them until the day you died.

You knew it wouldn’t be for a while though, since your love was too strong to get any of you killed.

—

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