#everyone we work with is exhausted

[sittinginsunflowers]

I can’t stop thinking about how every parental figure in Kristen’s life has failed her by prioritizing their other kids.

Obviously, her bio parents are racist assholes who raised her in a fundamentalist cult, and kicked out at 15, all because her parents were offended she was “taking her friends’ side over theirs.” Which she didn’t, what she did was ask for answers and tell them that Daybreak tried to kill her but they refused to believe her. Instead, they chose to make her homeless so she doesn’t spread the idea that her parents don’t know everything. Two years later, and they’re still doing the same thing at the diner.

Then there’s Jawbone and he’s Tracker’s guardian, and unlike Adaine, she didn’t get a speech about how he’d take her in, or what their relationship was, she just moved in with her girlfriend, and he was the adult of the house. And now that she and Tracker have broken up, he and Sandra Lynn don’t seem to have made the time to talk to her about what that means for her place in this family. Adaine came back from spring break to gifts for every birthday she had without Jawbone and adoption papers. Kristen’s mail from her school was going to her parents’ house when she lives with the guidance counselor.

Then, there’s the fact that when Sandra Lynn and Jawbone moved in together, she took on a role she clearly wasn’t ready for, as she was still repairing her relationship with Fig. Kristen had to be the one to finally snap her out of her self destructive spiral with Garthy and then Sandra Lynn asked her to keep it a secret. Meaning she wouldn’t be able to tell Tracker, the only person who has been meeting her emotional and physical safety needs, above just giving her a room to live in. (And we know this is true because part of the reason Nara and Tracker are together is because Nara doesn’t need those things from Tracker). And yes, Sandra Lynn apologizes to the whole group, as she should, for putting their home in jeopardy, which is a massive step. But she never talks to Kristen about putting her between the 3 people responsible for keeping her out of her parent’s house.

So Sandra Lynn calls Fig, “her only daughter in the world,” and Jawbone is only legally responsible for Adaine and Tracker, and neither of them, nor any other adult, has asked if Kristen feels safe or if she’s okay. Like I’m sorry, who the fuck is taking care of the cleric who’s god and teacher died in the same year, is going through deprogramming from a cult that wants her back, her first breakup, seeing her estranged parents and siblings again, and now being expelled on zero grounds despite working herself to the bone to make sure her party gets to go to college?

#dimension 20 #d20 #fantasy high junior year #kristen applebees #fantasy high #fhjy spoilers #also she’s died twice #And everyone is confused as to why she’s acting kinda batshit? #like as someone who had to do a lot of personal safety work because of one parent as a teenager that shit is exhausting #ever since the episode where we saw how Nara is just Kristen with money and parents #this has been bugging me and I’m getting more and more mad about it #like yes good parents drop the ball they’re people too and that’s okay #but for the love of god someone check on her and Fabian

[elcucurucho]

I really do think everything is going to work out, so much care has been put into this project, both by creators and admins, a restructure is disruptive short term but so incredibly necessary for the long term continuation of the server. It’s clear everyone working on the project believes in what they’re doing, and it’s unambiguously a good thing that going forward everyone will be fairly compensated for their efforts.

#qsmp #on a personal level however if there is ONE more situation that is difficult short term but productive for the future I’m going to SCREAM #it’s been literally on a weekly basis for a month straight I’m exhausted #I wish we could jump forward to when things are better without sitting through the ugly in between #but! not how life works! no way forward but through and all #however unrealistic it is I just want everyone to be happy. surely we’ll get there eventually

[emcake1]

Oh hey! In case you didn't know already, I'm part of this huge TSP neko march collab<3 check out the full thing on youtube!

#again I'm so SO glad to be part of this #working on this was fun but exhausting #WORTH IT THOUGH #biggest thank you and deepest gratitude to bear.. kat.. and everyone who participated and made the collab possible<3 WE ALL DID GREAT!!! #the stanley parable #the stanley parable ultra deluxe #tsp #stanley parable #the narrator #animation #cartoon #walk cycle #animation meme #animation collab #Youtube #my art #tsp narrator

[jihnari]

Hi, I was in your discord server, but it's not showing up in my server list?

if you read ch32 of QAB2, all will be revealed

(or i can just tell you, but it's a spoiler for QAB:)

in ch32 some stuff happens and for legal reasons the crew decides to delete the discord server. this has been a plot point since earliest versions of the outline. i literally made the server with the intention of destroying it, my introduction post was something along the lines of, "this server is a joke, i will not feel bad if you leave" and i meant it. this is peak humor for me.

i never expected to get 400 some odd people in there ESPECIALLY with the increased difficulty of the join link being hidden, but it did make the server more "real" which in turn i used to make the server in the fic more realistic... art is a vicious cycle

i also didn't expect it to take me three years to write that chapter tho, whoops

#qab #writing #i am told this is insane behavior #but when i commit to the bit i COMMIT to the BIT #anyway thanks for playing #we had a 24h warning in the announcements in the form of that image from majoras mask #you know the one #but everyone seemed to think it was a joke #it WAS a joke but not the joke they thought #art influences reality influences art #glad i finally managed it tho being a mod is exhausting work #answered asks

[miodiodavinci]

taking a break from working to say man. if the end up having to cut content to fit everything in 24 episodes, my favorite chapter of dungeon meshi is almost certainly getting cut skdjfhglj

#again i have no idea if they're going to try to fit everything into 24 episodes #or if they'll come back next season with another 24 to finish it up #but thinking about the story as a whole #i feel like my favorite chapters are some of the least crucial to the story overall in terms of broad strokes #which has me like damnb . . . . . . . . i was really hoping for it skdjfhlgkjsdf #again ! ! ! there's no use in me exhausting any thought over it #because either it happens or it doesn't and it's not like me thinking about it will change that #but man. i want. the changeling arc animated to badly it's so funny and one of my favorite bits of the story sdfjhgljksdf #shapeshifter arc too because oughhhh the insights into everyone's perceptions of one another ksjdhfgljsdf #like of course i am awaiting griffin soup like a hungry dog because WAILING WAUHHGHG #and the chances of them cutting that are Low unless they're like #speed running the end of the story or pulling an original fma and just outright writing a new ending that gets them out of dealing with #(gestures) literally everything that happens in the second 50 chapters of the series #though that feels less likely considering that they've been sticking to the manga pretty closely even after The Tone Shift #um. i. um. #i should probably get back to work and stop worrying about dungeon meshi huh. #um. i just hope we get the changeling arc that is my final message change da world goodbye

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

#hello to anyone who happens to b interested in the saga of my life... also maybe the irl person i gave my url to... hopefully my blog #didnt freak her out too much lol. anyway so its been a busy week? 2 weeks? month? year? life? its been a lot. my parents helped me move #across the country from the desert to somewhere that's beautiful and green. my dad is so jealous of me lol its so so so pretty and theres s #so much to do. will i do any of it? that remains to be seen but im gonna try to be better about that sort of thing. try to get some help #with the thoughts in my head that keep me from doing and enjoying most things. its weird like im decorating my new room which i love. the #location and living situation seem ideal and i really hope i can stay here all 5 years of my program but i was picking a lot of bright #colors and now it feel uncomfortable. like if i wear things that r too bright or my room is too bright without dark contrast it feel weird #like if im wearing it it kinda makes me feel sick. idk what thats abt. anyway. ill try to heal my brain and im just so happy to b out of the #southwest. i was so so so excited when we were leaving thr city and even more so when we left the state. i cant believe im here. in December #it felt like a million years away and i really truely could not fathom how i was gonna survive that long. my thoughts were so distorted. but #i did and here i am. and in like a month i should b starting my phd program and my parents were telling me how excited ppl r for me and #jealous of where im living and im glad. im glad they're excited. i think i am too but its under a layer of: if i get excited it wont happen #im not allowed to b excited or it wont happen. which is irrational but ya kno. anyway so that's yeah. im so happy to have a fresh start and #the town seems super cool. a liberal blip in a sea of... not that so theyre very visibly pride forward haha and i think itll b way easier #for me to get around without driving. and im gonna try to make friends. i need someone to tell me where to get tattoos haha. so yea im happy #but exhausted and i dont wanna go back to work and so so greatful to my parents for being wonderful ppl idk how bc both of them had fucked #up childhoods. like my mum will say the saddest shit and im like bro this is y i don't wanna talk to my grandma fuck her and my dads parents #r so fucked. like my nana is the reason im so fucking control freaked out but i kno i have issues and she has no insight and thinks shes #better than everyone. anyway hopefully i can get back to drawing a posting more now. ive been drawing it its been in a sketch book #like an actual sketch book for sketching big ideas thst r gonna take fucking forever to draw 😭 #so that's all. just uprooted my whole life. thats all. but in a good way :-] #unrelated

[heffrondriving]

soooo. that new big time rush album huh

#how we feeling today rushers (｡•̀ᴗ-)✧ #also yes i've come back from the dead just to post abt this like. i owe this blog *this much* at least ykyk #anyway its like 3 in the morning here and ive just woken up after a vv long and exhausting day yesterday so this was a pleasant surprise :> #i haven't really listened to it in full yet bc idk adhd things but when the mood hits right y'all know i'll be VIBING #i never talked abt it but waves and can't get enough were great earworms so i'm excited to see how the rest of the songs will turn out #also hope everyone's doing well here on the btr side of tumblr hehe y'all been absolutely fed this year <3 #is this gonna be allen's 2k23 tumblr comeback??? nah prob not i'm too in love with the fooo conspiracy atm but hey maybe also who knows 👀 #(*heckler from the back of the audience* NO ONE CARES ABOUT U AND UR TRASH CONTENT IDIOT STFU FOREVER ACTUALLY!!!!!) #but yep. life has been fuck work has been a headache and so many unwanted tragic plot twists this year. but at least we got new btr lezzgo! #also happy pride month y'all!!! just saying this for absolutely no rhyme or reason related to this post at all wdym lmao ¯\_( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)_/¯ #okay thats all promise i'll shush now and it's time for old grampa to disappear into the darkest recesses of the internet yet again hejdååå #btr #big time rush #another life #album #stop it forever #lmao i hardly remember my dumbass blog tags;;; it's for the best hdbfkgk

[dreamings-free]

Hi, do you know if this true? https://www.tumblr.com/awesomefringey/736084928800964608/hmmm-do-you-know-anything-about-this-some-says?source=share

hmm I don’t know.. just like op of that post, I have no knowledge of who he did or didn’t (un)follow. and most of louis’ band and management still follow him.. but I agree it is weird how he seems to have left very suddenly. I think the last time we saw him with louis was lisbon.. and then he was just.. not there for the rest of europe? he wasn’t even there for louis’ huge milestone moments on the uk tour leg which seemed very strange after how long they’ve been working together 🙁

#anyway even if he quit doesn’t mean there was any drama.. #JD also seems to not work with louis anymore at least not regularly #but I just assumed he wanted to stay in the US near his family and focus on local jobs #i mean touring is exhausting #so maybe both joni and JD just decided to stop doing these long tour jobs other people on louis’ crew have done the same #both krupa and tour manager mark brightman have quit extensive touring #(mark is now the festival director of AFHF) #there could be all sorts of reasons joni would take a break or quit altogether #that doesn’t involve any falling out with louis and/or his team #like if he’s stopped working due to stress or burnout he might have unfollowed everyone to not be spammed with tour content every day.. #we don’t know but him and lou go way back and seemed to care a lot for each other #so I can’t see them suddenly having some big falling out but who knows… #but yeah I miss him 🥺 #anon asks #hi joni #lt team

[pepprs]

genuinely so angry and scared im shaking. how many other times this week this month this year have i been exposed without knowing it. do people even tell each other anymore. it’s just so grim. it’s so fucking grim

#purrs #delete later #covid19 #i am fighting for my fucking life every day to stay safe and to keep the people around me some of whom are disabled / chronically ill / #immunocompromised / medically vulnerable safe. i am fucking fighting for my life. it’s already hard that i am usually one of two people in #any given room still wearing a mask let alone an n95 mask. hard and bad enough that we get looks for wearing masks and people think im crazy #for my life still being on hold and for my family still basically never going anywhere. ITS FUCKING WORSE that we are still very much in the #throes of all of it and we are in constant physical and quite frankly EXISTENTIAL danger not only of getting sick / becoming (more) #disabled / literally fucking dying but also returning to the absolute hell of lockdown which while important was psychologically damaging in #ways that are difficult to even articulate. like not only have we as a society decided to not give a shit about unpacking all of that and #healing from the trauma and assuming everyone went through the same thing when we very much did not and to just send everybody back to #school and work because 🤑🤑🤑🤑🤑capitalism🤑🤑🤑🤑🤑 but we have ALSO decided to pretend like the freakish unceasing danger just doesn’t exist #anymore and to get rid of every tool we had available to keep us safe or at minimum make people have to pay exorbitant amounts of money to #access them because 🤑🤑🤑🤑🤑capitalism🤑🤑🤑🤑🤑 !!!!!!! im TIRED. im so fucking tired of it. i am so fucking exhausted and angry and scared. and i #HAVE the luxury and privilege of being able to afford n95 masks and covid tests and to be able to work a job that i can do remotely if i #need to and to not be disabled or immunocompromised. what makes me fucking furious is we decided to throw all the people who don’t have #that access or privilege under the fucking bus and forget about them lol. but what do you expect from a country rotten to its core the way #it is lol. im fucking despondent. why are we living in an incinerator. #* the lockdown(s) werent just important they were necessary. and arguably we should have another one even though if we do i genuinely fear #for my mental health both during and afterwards and quite frankly before. im tired. i am grateful for the life i live which has resulted in #part from the different things that have happened because of the pandemic but i also so desperately wish this never happened and every day I #think about what life would be like if it hadn’t happened. the grief of it all is unspeakably big.

[workof-tortured-poetsdepartment]

I can neverrrrrrr understand this grind and hardwork bs like why even???????

#everyone dies in the end #whats the point to work hard exhaust and be still sad and patheit #why do we need to work for the good things #this fucked up humans ideas fr

[harrylights]

ok i just need to write down these whack 1d dreams i’ve had the last couple days

#so two nights ago it was that zayn had a reality dating show and i was ON IT #and the whole time i was like 😭 i’m too gay for this can i leave pls #it was in this place that was both super tropical but also a desert #and zayn INSISTED we keep going on these long ass walks thru the sand i was just like bro can we go back #and he got mad at me when i said i needed to go take a walk to decompress after this story about his ex that he told me #it was so vivid and surreal #but then the dream i just woke up from i was part of 1d in like 2013 era??? #and it was sooo busy so many interviews and a couple fan meeting things #and i was like damn this is exhausting #but also got to see these beaauuutiful places #like one of our hotels was suspended directly over this crystal blue water that had orca swimming thru it and we swam w the orca #and both harry and louis separately plotted w me to pull pranks on each other #harry was also like?? psychic?? like he could send images into everyone’s heads but he only did it w nice things lol #and then randomly at the end he came to work w my at this body jewelry company i used to work for #but like he was still him and on our application form to work there we had to disclose our income for some reason #and on his he was like i’m not telling u this 😐 don’t push it #like w the emoji too fhdhskeldk #but i’m out here like why am i dreaming of these guys even more when i’m taking a break from them #like i still listen to their music ofc but i don’t have the energy to participate in the fandom rn #it’s like they know and they’re like #u thought u could forget about us!!!!! syke bitch we’re haunting ur dreams now <3 #but whatever i’ll take this over the other vivid dreams i’ve been having lately #anyway #rowyn rambles

[faggotician]

its just....the way my brain is, if i dont see a point in something i do Not want 2 bother with it. but the issue is that working constantly has no ultimate point. im not working for a goal, im working to get food to allow this body's survival . whats the point in that. i want 2 create i want 2 have time 2 sit and draw stupid mspaint furries. i want 2 get home st 1am and not have 2 lament abt going 2 bed early cuz i need 2 get up early for the job i JUST finished . we all know how fucked up this is, and anyone who doesnt admit it is always clearly in denial . The empire is going to fall, & america has a reckoning, but its so depersonalizing 2 be a US citizin right now....

#Making it so so clear that as a USamerican i live in the lap of luxury at the cost of many people #My tax dollars directly contribute 2 worldwide genocides...coups #Almost every destabilization of any nation #And its so fucked up to know and be aware of how vile and evil this entire country is #& be a citizen of it & still just . like #Call it lazy or lack of willpower and if u rly feel that way lack of care but like #im so fucking exhausted frm working every daylight hour just 2 afford a basic cart of groceries #and 2 see whats happening & feel so immobilized by the need 2 work 2 sustain yrself & survive like #its just so hollowing. #ive tried 2 get coworkers & groups together 2 even just #sit on the steps of a manufacturer w signs and that cldnt even be arranged bc everyone is so fucking exhausted #we have 2 days of the week 2 not be grinding so its all spent recovering & leaves no room for pssion #& i know this is Exactly what They (they as is the hierarchal billionaire tyrants lobbying 4 corps) want #the guys in power need us exhausted & beaten down #its ez 2 push anything when yr life & soul is dedicated 2 profit 4 survival #What else do u have 2 care abt . just let it happen vote whatever doesnt kill u even tho u know its all fake #We all know it is . we all know our vote & our beliefs dont rly matter 2 the people who want the status quo forever #So what do we do but sit and cry and whine & make posts like this .

[releaseholiday]

Some people are just

#the only reason he’s ‘allowed’ to take a break is bc he’s so sick he either doesn’t have a voice or physically can’t even move #bc you know if he could still perform he would’ve been on that stage like he was at the latest la show #he was already sick and still had a show #and if people cared about him and not about the money they’ll be getting they would’ve cancelled the rest of the residencies #and given him the rest of the year to rest #he’s not going to get over a flu on a couple of days #the reason he even got it in the first place was most likely bc his immune system is fucked from exhaustion #he’s been working non stop for years #these residencies was the most unnecessary thing ever #literally everyone could see this coming and I’m so mad they still let it happen and instead of giving him time to actually rest #they’re basically saying ‘patch yourself up and go back on stage like the circus monkey that you are oh #and don’t forget you’re still gonna have to do the cancelled shows later bc we can’t let the azoff’s venue lose money #anyway💆🏼‍♀️💆🏼‍♀️💆🏼‍♀️ #I hope he gets better soon and I hope someone finally helps him realize he’s not a product but a human being who doesn’t have to apologize #3 times for something that’s out of his control #hope that therapist clears her schedule from going to his shows🙃🙃🙃

[termitesisagrandslam]

well i am officially employed again. 40+ hour work week here we come 🙃

#looking forward to like. a paycheck and decent insurance and stuff #not looking forward to being even more exhausted than i already am #i already have been in a creative and motivational slump for ages #this won't help :/ #i dont mean to complain about something everyone deals with and im glad i was able to get employment #i just will never get over how we are required to spend most of our waking hours in our one single life working just to survive #in a world with enough money and resources for everyone if the ppl in power didnt purposely make everything hell

[thediktatortot]

I keep seeing like 5 different ways that people are wanting to help tumblr, change tumblr or fight against tumblr and I have still yet to see anyone make any concrete ideas as to what it is people are supposed to do in order to keep the site from being monetized & become something it's not.

If the site does not pay off it's debt, it will eventually cease to exist. If you don't petition for change, it will continue to label queer bodies as mature and sexual, continue to remove BIPOC folk from it's premise and continue to allow white supremacists to infiltrate this site.

So what's the options? What are we supposed to do? How are we supposed to change a site without everyone sitting down and actually talking about what change means and how to get there?

I see so many people just tossing out ideas that in theory do work in one way or another, but might not fix all the problems so there HAS to be something that can fix things without disenfranchising half the communities on this site?

There's so many "don't do this, this hurts these people and now your a horrible person for suggesting this thing." When most the people on this site have no idea who most of each other are and why or how it would effect people.

Give actual insight as to what could be done to get Staff to pick up their fucking big boy pants and do their job. Going around and telling people that they are horrible people for trying to suggest a solution or the people who share those solutions in an attempt to help isn't going to help anyone.

This isn't aimed at one post or idea in particular either, I've seen NUMEROUS ideas floating around that in theory could work for one thing or another and all there is, is people shooting these ideas down without actually backing up with something that might work.

Half the people on this site are children who have no idea how websites work on a corporate level, the other half are adults who've been on this site since they were children and just want the site to stay online and not disappear. There's disabled people who need this site (I'm one of them) to keep having a social life, there's artists who need this site to contuse having any form of recognition, there's writers who've got their entire portfolio on here and people who's entire blogs are dedicated to helping queer and trans kids learn about themselves and communities dedicated to finding people like themselves so they don't feel so alone in this world.

So what is it? What are we supposed to do? Without money the site fades away, with strikes you completely disenfranchise entire groups of people, without fighting against the staffs changes, current policies and lack of care about the white supremacists and TERFS that run rampant then people are still going to get harassed, reported into the ground and completely removed from the site for no reasons at all.

So if you have any fucking ideas then please actually tell people because at this point, everyone's trying to not get people to do one thing or another and yet no one is backing up these ideas with actual action that will work.

#Tator Rants #I'm just exhausted with how everyone fucking yells at each other for coming up with ideas that might do something #and then hound anyone who doesn't understand how these things work just because they tried to spread a word about something potentially wor #working* #so either come up with a plan or stop shaming random fucking users for hoping to find a fix #it's not going to help just shooting absolutely every idea down from the sky #EXPLAIN why things wont work #We all know funding this site isn't going to change policies but it would keep the site afloat #we all know that striking the site would lead to profit drop and push the staff to change things but it would disenfranchise entire groups #so suggest something that works because right now everyone's just yelling at each other while #tumblr still gets to pull it's bullshit by hurting people and plotting to monetize the site to hell and back

[culmaer]

¶

#I've taken a uber to and from work like 4 times this week #it's expensive and I can't really afford to but I've felt like I don't have a choice #I've just been so incredibly tired #exhausted. both mentally and physically. like my body aches. #I *never* drive after alcohol don't worry. but I've honestly felt more confident to drive tipsy than I have this week just bc of exhaustion #like I feel the effects more #but somethings just occurred to me #and I feel a bit silly because it's so obvious in hindsight #my cousin was killed in a car accident two weeks ago. #I'm probably just scared subconsciously #the most heartbroken I've ever been was after my grand aunts death. she was basically like our grandmother #that was over 10 years ago but I've not experienced a comparable heartbreak or grief since #...... #but now. this is a different kind of sadness #anyway #it's the busiest time of year at work so we soldier on #tw death #cw death #hope everyone who needs to has those tags blocked #or should they be formatted with colons ? #tw: death #cw: death #also I need a new job I don't mind working over the holidays in theory but it really sucks rn and I want out