#except for the great white shark who is clueless

[themaarika]

a bunch of sharks remembering that they left the oven on at home

#sharks #sketch #why do they look so alarmed #except for the great white shark who is clueless #original post #misc art

[whenimaunicorn]

Keep Your Enemies Close - Bobo Del Rey Imagine

Fandom: Wynonna Earp  Rating: Explicit (don’t interact if you’re not over 18 please) Tags: dubcon, trapped in a small space, enemies to lovers

Requested by @that-was-not-supposed-to-happen, prompt line in bold. 

Worst. Decision. Ever. How is it, that when a literal demon from hell comes stalking through Shorty’s, looking to suck the souls of anyone it can grab, I end up choosing the same hiding place as my worst enemy?

“I haven’t heard anything in a few minutes,” I say softly to the big man in the even bigger coat, who is taking up most of the space in the broom closet we have accidentally chosen to share. “I’m going out.”

“Risky,” Bobo del Rey rasps, his mouth only a few inches above my ear.

“Well I’m not staying in here with you.”

“I can assure you that you are safe here… with me.” He puts on his trademark leer and I roll my eyes. Even if some glint in his smile makes me imagine things that set my pussy aching. Wrong time, wrong place, definitely wrong guy. “And I am not letting you open that door,” he continues, settling himself more firmly between me and the handle. “That thing out there has exceptional hearing. One squealing hinge, or particularly loud stomp from those ridiculous boots of yours—”

“You want to talk to me about ridiculous fashion!” I interject.

Bobo cuts me off with his hand splayed wide, his third and fourth fingertips landing on my lips to shush me. “We can’t make any noise,” he whispers. His eyes track quickly over my face in the dim light seeping around the edges of the door.

It’s rare to see him look nervous. That alone scares me enough to shut up, though I jerk away from his hand.

The back of my head contacts something hard, and I hear scraping wood.

“Shit,” Bobo hisses, and reaches out to grab something behind me.

I turn to see that what I had bumped is an assortment of precariously-stacked mops and brooms, which Bobo had narrowly caught before they clattered to the floor.

“Not a lot of room to maneuver in here,” he growls down at me. “You had better stay still.”

I lean away from the jumble of handles as Bobo sets them back against the wall over my shoulder. Which means I’m leaning closer in to him, the brushing of our bodies inevitable. The spicy, heady musk of him fills my nostrils, and there’s no way for me to get further away.

I examine the white patch in his beard, the matching interruption in his brow. I suppose as far as faces one could be stuck having to look at, his is at least an interesting one. My gaze flits to his eyes and I see that he is looking at me too. It’s awkward as fuck. I’m used to only staring at Bobo down the barrel of a gun. Now we’re in here, what, saving each other’s asses?

“How long do we have to wait here?” I ask.

“Until someone sounds the all-clear, I suppose.” His hand goes up in some vague gesture above his head, the movement rocking his body against mine again. The twitchy bastard can’t seem to stop talking with his hands, even in these tight quarters.

I dig my phone out of my pocket to check the time, then realize that I’d better turn it to silent mode before some clueless communication tips off the monster out there. “You’d better turn yours off too,” I say softly.

“Don’t have one.”

I look up at him skeptically. “You really are a man out of time, aren’t you?”

Bobo del Rey tips an imaginary hat at me.

Stuck in broom closet at Shorty’s – I type in a text to Wynonna –You take care of the monster yet?

“Don’t forget to tell her who you’re with,” Bobo breathes in my ear. There’s not really a way to hide my screen from him. Instead, I cover his view briefly with my middle finger. “Fuck you.”

“Now there’s an idea,” he taunts.

I pull back the last inch I had left to get away from him.

My screen lights up, indicating Wynonna has texted me back. Still being handled – stay put.

I slump. The fuck are we supposed to do now?

Bobo’s spindly fingers dance over my shoulder. I shrug him off without looking up. I try to browse Instagram on my phone, distract myself while we wait, but the signal is shitty back here and nothing new will load. I shove my phone back in my pocket in frustration.

Bobo’s fingers slide up the curve of my back.

“What are you doing?”

“Distracting myself.” His hand finds the clasp of my bra, and in one precise motion he unhooks it through my shirt.

“What the fuck!” I swear, feeling my breasts falling heavier, nipples hardening in their new extra space.

“You keep brushing your tits against me,” Bobo complains. “What else am I supposed to think about?”

“I don’t know, not getting your soul sucked out by a hell demon?”

Bobo only shrugs. “This is how I cope.”

I know I should stop him, but when his hands creep under my shirt, and he nuzzles his surprisingly-soft beard into the crook of my neck, I can’t think of a better way to pass the time either. All I can do to keep my pride is to pretend I’m not really into it.

Bobo’s fingertips slide around my sides, underneath my shirt. I try to control my breathing as I wonder how fast and how far he’s going to go. He draws circles around my flanks, like he’s giving me one last chance to complain, then his hands span each side of my ribcage as his thumbs slide under the loosened cups of my bra and make contact with the bottom of my tits.

I close my eyes and exhale as softly as I can, as heat rushes to my core. Bobo’s thumbs slide back and forth, every movement stoking that fire until I wish I had something to lean against. But that would just be a sign of weakness.

The first time his thumbs loop up to brush across my stiffened nipples, a mewl escapes my lips. Bobo’s face moves in front of mine, like somehow he can catch the sound waves before they get too far. “Hush, can’t make a sound, remember?” His tone is teasing, but that can’t be right. Isn’t he just as scared as I am? His open lips ghosts over mine. “I can cover your mouth if you need it,” he offers. “I don’t kiss and tell.”

I draw my neck up, pulling my lips a fraction away from his. “I’m fine,” I decline. “I hope this distraction is working for you. I don’t need any help.”

“Is that all this is,” Bobo rumbles. His fingers come up, capturing both my nipples in a firm pinch. “Just a little something for me.” He tugs down, both at once, and I swallow a yelp. “You’re not getting anything out of this.”

“Nope,” I say quickly, though the lie is obvious in my querulous tone.

Bobo grins a shark’s smile, head cocked right in front of my face. “Well if that’s the case, honey, then I’ve got something in my pants you can use your two hands on. That’d really help me out.”

“I’m not touching you.”

“Oh. Is that how you’re gonna play it.” Bobo squeezes my nipples again, lighter this time, massaging in a rhythmic pattern that finally makes me lean forward against him, just a little, needing the support. My hands press against the tight board of his abs, and I try to ignore the tantalizing urge to explore his body more.

He gives my ear a quick nibble, then pushes my shirt and useless bra up all the way to my collarbones. He gives a deep, masculine growl at the sight of my exposed chest, then leans in to lick across one breast, then the other.

I don’t even know how long he spends sucking on them, only that he does it until I can barely stop myself from squirming, until two white-hot lines of passion are drawing straight from my nipples to my throbbing cunt. I can’t give him the satisfaction of showing how much I need him down there. I would never fuck Bobo del Rey, and thank god this broom closet is too small for him to even be able to try without my help. Even with my help, I’m sure we wouldn’t be able to pull it off without making a heck of a lot of noise.

So I’m safe, relatively. It lets me feel free to allow him to keep making me feel so goddamned good, to let him play with my body as he wishes… knowing he could only take it so far. I can feel his erection straining through his pants every time he moves against me. It feels great to know how much he wants me, and how easily I can deny him.

Bobo’s hand slides down my belly, and pops open the button on my jeans. I breathe out in a burst, at this point only trying to suppress my desire to pant wildly for him. “No harm in a little heavy petting, right?”

No harm indeed. I do nothing to stop him from opening my pants as far as they will go and shoving his hand down inside my panties.

He purrs out a satisfied little noise against my ear as his finger runs straight down my slit, barely even parting my folds. “I knew you’d be this wet for me.”

I can’t even be embarrassed, not when his finger slides so sweet and easy past my last defenses, touching me exactly where I’ve been aching for it. He sinks in to the knuckle, and I only barely stop myself from moaning his name.

He gathers up my arms with his other hand, sweeping them behind my back and holding them there in a way that makes me arch my back and lean one shoulder into his chest. I’m bare to his eye from tits to cunt, my posture opened to give him the best possible view in this dim little room. The rush of his breath hardens my nipples all over again, and two fingers are now pulsing rhythmically inside me.

“You’re gonna give me everything, aren’t you.”

I shake my head, even as I bear down harder on his penetrating digits. “I’m never going to let you fuck me, Bobo. But I bet you wish I would.”

“Mmmmm you know I do,” he murmurs into my ear. “I can feel how tight and slick this pussy is. I’ve got some tricks with my fingers,” he makes some swirling motion that makes me bite my tongue to stop from calling out, “but can you imagine how much better it will feel with my cock in there? So much longer, and thicker…” He leans in and pumps as aggressively as he can manage with my legs still together.

“You gonna make me cum, Bobo?” I challenge, feeling the potential for orgasm sweeping up my whole body already.

He cocks his head to the side as I look up at him through my hair. “I’m not sure if that would be a good idea,” he teases. “We are supposed to be keeping quiet. And I have a feeling that you,” he presses his steely eyes closer to mine, “are a screamer.”

“Didn’t you offer to cover my mouth?”

The corner of Bobo’s lip tugs up in a smile. “That I did.” He leans down and presses a ferocious kiss to my mouth, tongue parting and invading me almost immediately. I answer eagerly with my own tongue, too far gone now to pretend I still don’t care, and he scrapes down it with his teeth. Bobo’s kiss is devouring, and all the while he’s rubbing against my clit, still curling his fingertips tight inside my body.

The kissing doesn’t last long. Bobo maneuvers me suddenly so that my back is against his front, fingers still buried in me. “The things I want to do to you…” he growls against the skin of my neck. “There’s no way you would be able to keep from screaming.”

I had almost forgotten this was a demon revenant with his hands all over me.

“But they’ll be worth it,” he promises, shifting his pumping fingers into a toe-curling angle, and wrapping his other hand squarely across my mouth, making me lean against his chest to stay balanced. “You come see me again, you’ll cry and you’ll scream, but I’ll make you feel like this, too.” He licks along the edge of my jaw. “At least four more times.” Then he pumps into just the right spot to make that mind-numbing crest of orgasm start to blaze.

I do want to scream when it hits me, my body seizing up around his wicked fingers and almost trying to reject the pleasure at the same time that I finally succumb to it. I keep the volume as low as I’m able, and Bobo’s big hand wrapped across my mouth muffles the rest to something that probably won’t attract any unwanted attention. Bobo holds on as all the subsequent waves hit me, my body milking the fingers he has buried as deep inside as he’s able, the heel of his hand still rocking against my clit and forcing every last bit of pleasure out of me as I pant and shake.

When I’m coming down I keep my back leaning against him, the fur of his ridiculous coat tickling my cheek as I catch my breath, languid in my afterglow. He removes his hand from my mouth in favor of stroking knuckles along my cheek. “That was beautiful,” Bobo praises, and something in his tone feels just a little too awed, a little too real. I’m not ready to think of Bobo del Rey as a person, more than just a monster that I had allowed to use me just this one time.

So I pull my shirt back down hastily, balancing onto my own two feet, though his hands stay on my hips as I try to break contact.

Not a moment too soon. A few brisk steps sound in the hallway, and then the door is yanked open, light streaming in. Bobo’s back is to the door, and I have to thank the enormous coat now, because it blocks my situation from Wynonna’s view. I know it’s Wynonna that opened the door, because she immediately curses at the sight of that brown fur and sputters, “Bobo?”

I button my pants quickly as he smirks down at me, trying to catch my eye for a final goodbye. Instead, I push past him. “I’m here, Wynonna. Safe and sound.”

She’s standing in the hallway with Peacemaker in both hands, Waverly standing a pace behind her. Her brows are drawn so high they almost reach her hairline. “What are you doing in there with him?” Wynonna even grabs my elbow and pulls me a little behind her as Bobo del Rey emerges fully from the broom closet behind me.

I scowl over her shoulder. “He picked the same hiding place as me.”

“Well.” Wynonna’s clearly not sure what to say, thrown off by the unexpected sight of her usual enemy in such close quarters.

Bobo doffs his hand in front of his face, giving her a mocking little bow. “And I thank you for the rescue today, Earp.”

Wynonna just scowls at him, and starts to walk away. “I’ll deal with you another time. I’m going to find a way to get Shorty’s out of your hands,” she promises.

“Of course you are,” Bobo says, voice dripping with condescension. Then his eyes rivet onto my face. “As promised, I got you through it, safe and sound.”

I strike a disaffected pose, showing off for Wynonna and Waverly, even as my limbs still have a slight tremble from the powerful orgasm this man had just given me. “Oh yeah, you’re great in a crisis, Bobo.”

Wynonna is already pulling me away.

Bobo smirks after me. “Maybe you'll let me buy you an ice cream some time.”

I wave a noncommittal hand at him, as Wynonna screws up her face and turns to me. “What?”

I shrug as we turn the corner back into the main room of Shorty’s. “He thinks we're friends now.”

Waverly quickens her step to come up to my other side. I feel her hand brush up across my back, unimpeded. “Hey, is your bra unhooked?”

#bobo del rey imagine #bobo del rey x reader #bobo del rey x oc #bobo del rey smut #wynonna earp smut

[thankyouforchoosingoptionone]

Eldritch Book one Cht 1

    The salt on the wind left his lips dry and cracked, too many days at sea. He didn’t keep track of it he just tried to sleep the most of them away, though it's hard to sleep when you are force to stand, or other wise hang by the wrists as shoulder height shackles keep you bound. The chains of the shackles were engraved with Elven spells made specifically for him. The inhibit manna flow and prevented him from using his magic. The dark confines of his cell were made even lonelier when you count he was the only prisoner being transported. He sat against the white oak of the ship the best he could with the irons digging into his wrists.

     He felt the irons bite, but soon he smiled to the sweet feeling of exhaustion and sleep. He was sure he was being taken to be executed, so this was luxury to him, a bit of sleep again. "You're not done yet.". He awoke to the sudden and deafening blow of a cannon ball through the hull, blasting apart the steel bars of his cage and sending a scatter spray of splinters all directions. "Good morning to you too…" He jests with a smirk in his cage. A bell starts ringing full speed above him, he laughs at the music of chaos the elves displayed. "The yellow skins act like they've never been attacked by pirates."

   Outside the ship, a massive Golden wood built ship with crimson sails was attacking this prisoner cargo carrier. Cannons lined in triangular triple gun patterns on the top row, but single more tight together on the bottom. The figurehead bore 3 serpent like necks connecting to individual unique dragon heads. The elven captain, dressed in his fancy whites and blues, only could whisper to himself from fear, "The Ghidorah" .

    Atop the helm of this battleship, the captain stood looming over a crew of mixed bloods. Hybrids, orcs, humans and one Sea Elf. The captain himself, dressed wearing only leather pants, a tightly woven burlap type shirt, and leather jacket, was the great Dagon Dragmouth. Orange scales covering the body of this lumbering Dragonkin, with his wings tucked onto his shoulders as a cape. He smiled with a maw of daggers as smoke left his nostrils like trails from a burning pipe. "Fire the Scatter!" . His command booms to the lower decks of his ship as a team of crew mates push forward one of the triple guns. The cannons weld together with one powder chamber in the rear, loaded with shrapnel of broken chains, rusted bladed, and fractured cannon balls. They ignite the fuse and the guns fire in a horrible noise. The shrapnel tears through the first hole made, making it big enough to fit a crew through.

  The Wiseman looked at his right hand, the shrapnel cannons blown past his hand, ripping the one shackle off with little damage to his flesh. "That’s stupid luck. Thank you impossible odds" He jests to himself again and stops when the silhouette of Dagon himself shown through the light of the ship's hole. Small waves of water would manage to reach up to his feet as he walked past the broken threshold he made. He laughs as he witnesses thirteen elven soldiers lined up in their ridiculous Black iron armor with the gilded trims. Dagon draws two massive scimitar swords, the heat from his throat was so hot the Wiseman could feel it, "whoa big guy wait!" but his warning went unheard and the Flames from the Dragonkin went fast and hot, setting fire to much of the wood it contacted with. The elves seemed to vanish inside the flames, until it was done burning. Once his mouth shut The elves stood unharmed. Red Manna runes engraved in the armor they wore shielded them.

    The Pirate lizard was taken back, growling and without aid at this level he stepped back. Suddenly, 3 portals opened around the group of soldiers. Purple rings of alien writings spin making these portals causing distraction to the elves and even Dagon at this moment. The first portal, directly above the elves, dropped a swarm of slime spitting winged creatures, like scaled bats with mouths on the belly and no head. The slime they spit was stinky and stuck to them very well. One small creature taking interest in Dagon spit at his face as well and flew off. All the creatures return to the first portal once all elves have been coated. Dagon wiped his face.

     The other two portals released strange tentacles covered in  some kind of chitin carapace, tipped with pincer claws found on crabs but wider with bowl like openings in the very center. These claw tentacles moved quick and made short work of the elven troops. Eviscerating and devouring them as they try to fight back. The elven steel cuts through the chitin easily but there are far too much of them and soon the tentacles retreat into the portals, having consumed all elves. Dagon looked upon the scene in awe and shock, but not horror. He turned his head to the laughs of the Wiseman who had one hand freed and seemed to be the source of this scene. His eyes burned a purple haze that matched the rings. This haze, while unworldly, faded away soon. The Wiseman smirks "let me out…we share an enemy.".

   Dagon sheathed his blades looking at this human. He never had before seen that kind of magic, it gave him a terrible feeling of familiarity. He had questions and this human didn’t seem to be a threat to him. The sea elf ran down stairs with two gun axes in his hands, ready to take on whatever he thought made that noise. Not expecting to see Dagon freeing the sole prisoner on the ship. "Oi, Captain?! What made all that noise? And..All this blood" he questioned, looking down at his bare feet now slick from walking in the elven blood. The Sea elf had blue green skin, and a set of frills around his neck with green hair he kept tied under a red bandanna. His teeth were like shark's razor and serrated.  Dagon smirks, "A new crewmate Innsmouth, mr. …?" The Wiseman smiled brightly, and kindly. You can call me Thomas…Thomas Eldritch."

    Dagon drew a blade from his belt "Can you use one of these?" and gives the handle end to Thomas, holding the blade in his claw. Thomas nods taking the heavy steel with both hands and smiled again. Innsmouth tilts his head to the side at the grin on Thomas's face. "You sure Cap'n? He looks….Sweet like" Dagon walked past him with an impatience in his step and tone, "Better this than that unholy image he burned in my brain just before.."

    Both Thomas and Innsmouth fallowed Dagon out of the smoldering underbelly of the ship. Topside his crew have subdued the last of the elves they did not kill. A few bodies scatter on the deck, mostly of the yellow skinned elven soldiers. Dagon came up the stairway to the topside. He looked at the ship around him "Tell me why a Highborn Prison ship has double crew here for one single man?" There was a clueless silence about Thomas, "Oh wait your asking me? Well because I'm the Aberration." Dagon, Innsmouth, and any crew in earshot looked at Thomas in disbelief.  Thomas rolled his eyes, walking towards the captain's quarters of the elven ship and retuning with a log book.

   The book was small and bound with linen that was resin soaked all over except the spine which remained soft linen. Leather straps acted as the muscle of the spine of the book. Dagon peers into the book of the last most recorded date. 6 weeks ago, and only one prisoner, Aberration was put in the last name category, leaving the first name blank Dagon looked Thomas dead in the eye, the silence broke with Dagon's laugh. "Of all the ships on all the seas, I find the one holding the oldest living thing on this world! And it turns out, the legendary Aberration the elves love to hate and hate to fear, is a Fucking Human!" Thomas laughed with him "I mean I'm far from Human at this point." They laughed together for a moment, until Innsmouth felt need to interrupt, "Cap'n, she's burning hot we best go now". Dagon wiped his jaw and nods, "Aye, leave the Yellow skins and take nothing. We have the big prize here". Thomas couldn’t help but feel his vanity make him smile.

    The Pirate crew bind the legs and arms of the elven crew, leaving them aboard the slow burning ship they dared to serve that day. Innsmouth took the helm of the Ghidorah and began his sailing away. Dagon taking Thomas below deck to the Galley, filled with the smell of salt meat, pickled vegetables, and fermented fruits. "The stink of a real pirate ship" Thomas smirked as he looked around. Dagon nods proudly, "Aye, if you don’t want to puke you're not on a pirate ship. Go ahead mate get some fill in you. Damn highborns must've starved you." Thomas had no hesitation to begin his inhalation of the food and drink. Dagon laughed, knowing any prisoner on an elven ship would think this food Gourmet compared to the stale bread and cold slop the elves fed you. "Come back topside when you feel acclimated mate. We need to have words and I do my thinking in the wind.".

    After eating himself a food baby belly, Thomas walked up the steps of the Ghidorah and felt the breeze of the wind tug at his long brown hair. He smiled, tearing off the rag garb tunic he wore leaving only his short trousers. He spread his arms to the wind and took a deep breath "Taste different, Don’t it?" Thomas looked to the port side of the ship, A young Uru orc boy smirked at him. His red skin covered in pirate tattoos, bearing no shirt and a face like a bald wolf "You got pulled off the ship, a prisoner. The air was bitter, gross, stale. But now the wind carries the taste of Freedom on the wind and it tastes sweeter right?" The orc smiled at him and walked up, offering his hand "Name's Jackoo, Quartermaster." Thomas smiled and shook his hand, then grimaced a bit at the orc's grip, "Remember my face, your going to know it a lot, and Remember my grip and hope I don’t have to use it again". Thomas laughed, his smile was goofy and entertained "I like you already, Just call me Th" "I heard your name, Eldritch. Know your place and we'll get along fine".  Thomas had to tilt his head in confusion, "And what's my place on this ship?". Jackoo pointed to the bow, where Dagon stood staring at the waves. "That's for the captain to decide. Best get now".

    Thomas approached Dagon slowly, not to disturb a man in thought. He was barely up to Dagon's armpits, the man was so big. Not tall but big, and wide. Dagon's voice lost it's rumble now, a beast calmed by the wind spoke to Thomas now, "My da once told me that the seas would take men to where they need to be. You just had to trust them. Break that trust, or doubt their hold and you damn yourself. Sailors only request direction, its her choice to take you there…" He looked at Thomas, "..and here we are, Two men of equal infamy to the Highborn Order. The sea pushed us together mate, now we must figure out if it's Damnation or Salvation."

   Thomas looked at him listening close. Then he looked at the water below the ship racing past. "I hear the incredible urge to jump into that water or off of a really tall place like the nest up there." He jests pointing. "But the voices that actually are there wont leave me alone about my, air quotes, duties". Dagon just stares. This madness was just that to him, madness. "Why do the elves hate you?" He demanded. "You mean you don’t know that much?"

Dagon shook his head at the question when he wanted an answer "Everyone knows the basic Bull..Your a human who doesn’t age…from before history was written, and you preach gods that don’t exist and use magic that shouldn’t exist."

"Don’t forget the part where I was taught an alien language and now all humans and a few other races speak it. How's that for a mind fuck?"

     Dagon smirked at the logic for a bit but then had to ask "What's and alien?" Thomas had to think. He smiled very manically when he found his answer, "Well, something so obviously not from this world that is a living being of some shape or form. Examples. " he spins his wrists upside down and forms 3 new small purple spell rings, creating the portals in the ring. The center most portal raises a small sentient warrior inside a glass dome. The warrior had 6 arms and 4 legs with segmented plates along the spine, scaled male going over the limbs. His weapons seemed to be tiny forms of riffles with jagged bayonetted ends. The left most portal made a sort of dog creature but made of stone. The  creature was infant in state and sleeping softly. Woken by the angry cries of the warrior next to it, though the warrior was not attacking the dog. It was attempting to attack the right most portal creature with futility. The portal raised a beast that was mechanical in origins but with science unknown to the pirate captain. Colors of red green and yellow strings wove through plates and joints with sounds of fluids moving metal rods and cylinders to move limbs. The machine beast was also trying to attack the warrior but prevented by a glass dome.

   Once he was sure Dagon understood the word Alien, Thomas returned the creatures through the portals and made the rings vanish. Dagon was dumbfounded, but he certainly took a firm hold of alien now. He quickly took annoyance to the joy Thomas got from watching Dagon. "…Well I got no more questions right now. So your going to help me out." he started walking back to the stairwell in the middle of the deck. "I am hunting a monster…and your magic is….well I Think I might have found some other kind of alien before I Found you..".

    Thomas fallowed, his ears pinned to the voice of the pirate lizard. His hope rose a bit, he wanted the alien to be the same one who changed him those years ago. Thomas had so many more questions of his own he needed to ask that being. He held hope that the alien was not dead. Dagon lead Thomas to a chart room in the ship, no doorway just a corner that holds a map on each wall and a massive globe sitting on a table. Dagon Rolls the globe around and stops it, leaving his finger over the Sea of Monsters. Thomas tilts his head looking at it. "My da and I saw it there...before the beast took his life…". Thomas lost that hope now, but continued to listen. "What did it look like?"

  Dagon's tone was low, solemn, and angry, "The beast was 4 times the size of this ship…scales covered it's body like amethyst tile plates. It's spine was traced with broken stone like ridges that stuck out to rip the wood from your keel. It's tail was a single long tentacle covered in tiny little hooks, just like the ones that covered is face…" "It's face..?" Thomas interjected. "Well if you call that mug a face, it bore what was like some freak leviathan squid as a head with the most hideous eyes. It's maw was several beak teeth that spit acid that burns flesh like my flames, it turns wood to mud and combusts in the water…I call it…the Nightmare Dragon."

     Thomas nods and looked at the globe "I know what it is, I can help you kill it. But why chase that thing when you seem to be capable as a pirate alone? You are Captain Dagon Dragmouth the most famous pirate ever." Dagon picked up his belt at his sides and let out a deep sigh, "I'll be straight with you mate, I am mid way through my life, and I've yet to find my own MATE if you get me." Thomas nods, understanding the sentiment. "So I want to do one big thing before my…Hiatus lets call it. I want to be able to tuck a wee gecko into bed on a galleon I built myself. This bed will be that monster's bones woven into a glorious nest for my child, and that gecko will look up at me and go, 'Da, tell e again how I got this amazing luxurious bed Da oh please tell me again.' and I'll go on and tell them How I Took it on my own beautiful self to slay this beast in my Da's name just to build my spawn the most perfect nest!"

    Thomas and Innsmouth both laugh, Dagon turned his head to face his second mate, "The fu..when did you get here?" Innsmouth salutes like an elf "Oh da please da tell me again" making Thomas laugh hard. Dagon growls at the two making them silent fast. "Point is mate, I want to give my family a legacy, or die trying. What say you Mate??" .

    Thomas returned the stares Innsmouth and Dagon were giving him. He sighed a little bit, "What the fuck it'll be fun". Innsmouth and Dagon both cheered, as did Jackoo and the crew above who all eavesdropped through the stairwell. Thomas laughed, he brought Dagon's attention back to the globe. "that creature, we are going to keep the name Nightmare Dragon, so much cooler than what it's called, is going to just sit and huddle in the squid waters. One ship clearly wont work, you need at the least…4 galleons."

    "how in the hell do we get 4 fucking galleons when we can barely keep track of 3 brigs?" Jackoo tossed the question at Thomas, who responded by putting his finger on one spot on the globe. Everyone leaned in to see the location, Seaport City. The only human city in the world. Innsmouth jests "Oh Excuse me Queen Annabelle but we PIRATES need to borrow 4 of your Galleons to hunt a monster that eats monsters and turns wooden ships into soup." Dagon smacked Innsmouth on the back of the head, "Seaport has no Dry Dock Construction laws, we can build the boat's ourselves…" Innsmouth rubbed his head and pouts defeated, while Jackoo thinks and looks at Thomas "But how do we fund that?"  Thomas smiled, "Your Hunters, pirates, and enemies of the Highborn Order. Queen Annabelle will gladly trade with us any ink, meat, and Beaks you get from squid, as well as spoils taken by the elves."

    Dagon nods "It'll take some years to do it, getting it off the ground earning her favor and what not."  Innsmouth interjected again "some time means like twenty years or what ever, that’s fucking forever." Jackoo glared, "yeah for me, you’re a newt, he doesn’t age, and captain is a Dragonkin.". "Call me a newt again you mud born little.." Dagon growled, "Enough, we are sailing to Seaport…We build the Galleons to Eldritch's specifications, as long as it takes to do it.".  The Ghidorah ship began it's sail towards the most diverse city on the planet, and home to the last of the human race.

#monsters #cthulhu #Kaiju #pirates #elves #orcs #dragons #dragon #magic #magics #gods #devils #eldritch #fantasy #writer #writing #write #writers #amature

[kira-desomma]

Ok strap in y’all because you’re in for a wild ride as I tell the story of my apparent subconscious desire for a shark-demigod boyfriend. Honestly, last night’s dream reads like something out of a Chuck Tingle novel and I couldn’t be happier. I woke up at 4AM unable to fall back asleep until I wrote this down, y’all, so here it is. 

ACT I

The day started out pretty normal - ya know, by accidentally summoning a shark demigod in a hurricane. I was just a normal recent college grad, obsessed with a hot surfer dude, trying to find a Real Job, and spending most of my days at the beach. When my boogie board got away from me in a rogue wave, I was seemingly lost at sea until a lone hammerhead shark (whom we will call Jeff) saved me and my fear drove me to shore. I don’t know if y’all know this but hammerhead sharks actually travel in little communities and their groups are called a ‘frenzy’ or, even cooler, a ‘shiver’ (a fact I most definitely did not Google just now). He wanted to protect me, and so I made him listen to all my stories about Hot Surfer Dude, who looked like HSM-era Zac Efron, because that’s what you do to rationalize a shark demigod becoming your overly-protective buddy, I guess. (Please keep in mind that he was literally a hammerhead shark All the Time and I didn’t actually know at this time that he was a demigod, just that he was a Talking Shark). 

Time passed, and Jeff really fell hard for me, but I was blind to his advances. Finally he agreed to transport me to the cabana behind Hot Surfer Dude’s house late at night so that I could sneak up to Hot Surfer Dude’s window and confess my love. It was a foolproof plan, and anyway he agreed not to bother me after that so I was thrilled. It was, after all, a pain in the neck having to meet with him in the open ocean! 

Anyway my best friend ended up betraying me and sleeping with Hot Surfer Dude, who was actually totally shallow and a Real Dick™, and the only redeeming person in my life was Hot Surfer Guy’s mom, who found me on their property and told me I needed to go home right before he came out of the house and literally laughed at me for thinking I could ever fall for a girl like me. It was humiliating. 

Heartbroken and lost, I realized that I actually was in love with Jeff, the shark demigod! But I was seemingly too late - he had already talked to his shark god supervisors and they sent him back out to sea, to wander forever. Even as they strapped him into the Ocean Velocity Launcher 3,000, he knew he loved me and his heart broke. 

I wept into the sea, sure that I would never find Jeff again. But my tears not only called him back, my love broke his curse! Now both of us could be sharks and humans at any time, and his human form looked remarkably like a young Jeff Goldblum so I was naturally thrilled. 

Our first act as sharks was to eat Hot Surfer Dude. Just kidding! We just scared him shitless while he was in the ocean and laughed ourselves silly. 

Our first act as humans was to kiss on the beach, chatting with the other demigods, laughing about when he was a shark and I was just a clueless human. We even had two little sharklings of our own who played in the sand! 

ACT II

Godhunters came into our little town. By this time we had become so powerful we could roam the streets in our shark forms and swim above the towns as if the air was water. We were feared and respected, even though it was modern times, because we kept Evil Energy (akaTrump) out of the town. 

So the Godhunters came, but shark family is strong and wants to protect the fam and protect the town. There were two Godhunters, a man and a woman, and the man came at me first with an arc of light that he used as a whip. Except... when he tried to attack me with it, it only grew on my own magic and I was able to absorb it. He was understandably very upset, because this could only mean one thing: he was also a shark demigod, and his magic was the same as ours! 

Turns out his family forgot to submit their paperwork to the High God Council :( so he was definitely a Shark Demigod but he didn’t know and all his life was a lie :( 

But never fear! Jeff, my shark demigod husband, and I took a liking to the young whippersnapper and we became a throuple. We worked together to defeat his evil ex-girlfriend the Godhunter who’d had him convinced his life’s mission was to kill us. 

The dream ended with the three of us celebrating our successes and transforming into our sharkselves. Jeff, as I said, was a hammerhead... the ex-Godhunter was a tiger shark. And me? I was most definitely a great white. Someone’s got to scare the tourists into behaving! 

In short: we all lived happily ever after! 

... ok I know that was a long read but please let me know if you would read a webcomic or short story based on this because I am seriously considering it. This was the most vivid dream I’ve maybe ever had and I kind of felt like it was a direct line from a real life shark-god, just sayin’. 

**Edit: If this gets over 100 reblogs I will write this as a novel hahaha

#writeblr #personal #dream #dreams #dream journal #witchy