They might be onto something here
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Receiving his vaccination, the grad student shudders at the thought of having flimsier excuses to avoid social interaction.
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If someone tells you he is going to make a “realistic decision,” you immediately understand that he has resolved to do something bad.
Mary McCarthy (1912-1989) American author, critic, political activist
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Be stronger than your excuses
It’s the only way to thrive.
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10 Excuses For Your OTP To Cuddle/Hug
“Hey, I’m super cold - can you come warm me up?”
“In order for us to be compatible, I need you to just put your arms around me for a moment so I know how good of a hugger you are.”
“Hey, help me onto my feet, will you? Don’t let go of me when I’m actually on my feet, though.”
“Scary movie? I don’t want to watch a scary m.. wait, you’ll cuddle with me? Why didn’t you tell me sooner? Let’s do this!”
“I’ll forgive you for what you did if you give me a big hug right now.”
“Your body is so small compared to mine. Look; I can just wrap you in my arms so snug and warm.”
“I really don’t want to stand anymore. Will you put me on your hip until we get back?”
“My head really hurts.. could you give me cuddles to make me feel better?”
“You bought me a gift?! What is it?”
- “A hug.”
“That person over there keeps staring at me. Hide me in your arms until they’re gone?”
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Thoroughly unsurprised to see That Vegan Teacher become the anti-vegans’ new PETA. This kind of ‘nut picking’ is a go-to tactic among the opponents of every social justice movement and should be recognised as the blatant manipulation that it is.
They select the most extreme members of a group, spotlight them and then pretend that they represent the group or the ideology as a whole in order to attack it. Instead of condemning the behaviour of the organisation or the individual in question, they use it as their excuse to condemn an entire movement, and in doing so, also condemn the victims that movement is trying to advocate for.
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All humans make mistakes. What determines a person's character aren't the mistakes we make. It's how we take those mistakes and turn them into lessons rather than excuses
It Ends With Us, Colleen Hoover
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That Apology Thing
Luke: [age 16] “Can we talk about that apology thing?”
Luke: “So, way back, when I accidentally cut your brand new power cord with the electric trimmer, I said I was sorry, but you said I wasn’t really apologizing, and you were too tired to explain it.”
Me: “I think my exact words were, ‘you suck at apologies.’”
Luke: “Well, yeah.”
Mom: “To be fair, the vast majority of humanity sucks at apologies.”
Me: “That’s true.”
Luke: “OK, but what did I do? I mean, the whole point of apologizing is to make the other person feel better, and I said I was sorry, so... what?”
Me: “Actually, that is not the point of apologizing.”
Mom: “Making the other person feel better is just a bonus. But they might not feel better at all.”
Me: “The point of an apology is for you to take personal responsibility for what happened. It’s about you trying to set things right.”
Luke: “I did. I said I was sorry. I said it was my fault.”
Mom: “And then what did you say?”
Luke: “Well, I said it happened because the cord had gotten wrapped around the branch, and the sun was in my eyes, and it was hard to see, and I was kind of tired. And all of that stuff is true.”
Me: “Yes, all of that is true. But when you say ‘I’m sorry’ and then immediately follow with ‘but it was because of X, Y, and Z’ then you have just shifted the blame from yourself to something else. You just killed your apology because you’re no longer taking personal responsibility.”
Mom: “All those things are reasons why it happened, but you’re using them as excuses why it’s not actually your fault.”
Luke: “But they’re all true! Am I just supposed to not say anything about all that? Make it just sound like I’m stupid?”
Mom: “You have to phrase things differently, so they are reasons but not excuses.”
Me: “For example: instead of saying, ‘I’m sorry I cut the cord, but it got cut because it wrapped itself around the branch,’ you could say, ‘I’m sorry I cut the cord; I didn’t realize the cord would get wrapped around the branch like that, so now I know to watch out for that next time.’”
Mom: “Yeah, that works. It means you have apologized and explained the reasons it happened and taken responsibility for everything you possibly can — including your lack of knowledge, and the future. That is not just a difference in words. It’s a real difference in meaning and intent.”
Me: “And if you think about it, some of your reasons could actually still be your fault if this could have been avoided. If you were tired, then maybe you should have taken a break or stopped working. If there was light in your eyes making it hard to see, you should have changed your angle or put on a hat or something else.”
Mom: “Those are things you can take responsibility for, instead of blaming the sun or your tiredness.”
Me: “The sun can’t apologize for being in your eyes.”
Luke: “OK, OK, so like this? I’m sorry I cut the cord. It was my fault. I didn’t realize the cord would get wrapped around a branch like that, so now I know to pay more attention. I probably should have taken a break, too, since I was tired. And maybe put on a hat since the sun was in my eyes. I’ll be more careful next time.”
Me: “See, now that was a good apology.”
Mom: “That was pretty good. But, pay attention to how people apologize. Some people add so many excuses to avoid taking responsibility, it’s almost like they want you to believe they weren’t even there when it happened.”
Me: "Or they apologize for how you feel about it, but they don't take any actual responsibility for doing anything wrong. There are more non-apologies than real apologies out in the world."
Mom: "Like we said: most people suck at apologizing."
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Removing the false-self can be a very painful process. Pain is why many remain untrue to who they truly are. It is only at the time of death for only a brief moment do they experience their true human potential only to realize it has been wasted and unused.
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Awareness, or consciousness-raising, or feminist theory, whatever you want to call it, is of course necessary, because it’s what helps orient our actions to liberate ourselves. But awareness and theory without action? What is even the point? You’re just left stewing in the reality of your oppression, and not even trying to escape? Sure, not everything we do can be considered “feminist” action, but if you’re not even trying, what are you getting aware for?
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Wei Wuxian’s increasingly bad excuses for why he doesn’t use his sword
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Armin: *hurriedly goes inside* Sorry, I’m late!
Mikasa: *staring coldly at Armin* And why exactly?
Armin: *blushes* Uhh... important matters...
Mikasa: And what would that be?
Armin: *blushing harder* Uhh.... attachment—
Mikasa: Oh cool, attaching to Annie... is that it?
Mikasa: Very important, I see.
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Heyyyy- Yes- It's me again -w- Just wanted to ask Pater Something qwq"" Sooooooo, why did you Smash my Head against the Window again? >~> Im mean i tried to jump Out but still!-pouts and crosses arms-
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hi!! semi-urgent. I'm in college and almost 100% stealth (only out to my roommate and a professor or two) but I'm getting top surgery (ftm) near the beginning of this semester. i'm taking the necessary time off but I know my mobility will be limited/different for weeks or months after, and i know people will ask questions. is there a surgery that has similar affects that i could say I got that's not super serious but would still explain the mobility issue? and please don't say that it's none of their business and they shouldn't be asking, because not answering just raises more suspicion and i need to tell my professors/student life office something, and i really don't want to need to out myself because i got a surgery that's supposed to help me be stealth. thank u!!
If you need to tell your professors and your student life office something to explain the reason why you need two weeks off from classes, you could tell them that you’re getting a similar surgery.
Gynecomastia surgeries can involve liposuction and/or excision just like trans top surgeries, and therefore leaves similar scars. Gynecomastia is always a good excuse because it isn’t a serious medical issue or disability which would be kind of ethically questionable to fake. And it’s similar enough to the surgery you really are getting, so you won’t be asked questions that you don’t know how to answer (which is the danger of straight-up lying). And it’ll explain any visible scarring you may have once you’re healed, although that wouldn’t be an issue with your professors because they don’t see you shirtless.
Or you could talk to the disability services office and see if you can get a generic “medical time off” note to provide to them for privacy reasons. Getting academic accommodations like time off for mental health/disability/surgery/etc typically require you to disclose to their office what the disability is, but then they don’t tell the professor because it’s your private health information.
In general, if your professors get the note and ask why you need 2 weeks off then saying “I don’t feel comfortable discussing my health issues but I appreciate your concern and I want you to know that I’m going to be okay” or “I’d rather not talk about it, but I really appreciate your understanding about helping me find a way to make up any missed classes!” wouldn’t immediately make your professors think that you’re trans because there’s a lot of health and mental health issues someone can have and people often don’t want to discuss it because it’s stigmatized/embarrassing/private/etc, especially when it’s gastrointestinal related or mental health related. If you do think that asserting your boundaries is suspicious, then you can tell them the aforementioned gynecomastia excuse.
It’s true that your ability to reach/stretch and carry heavy things might be affected for a while, but it won’t be noticeable in a classroom setting if you don’t draw attention to it, so you don’t really need to tell anything at all to your classmates because they won’t notice.
You’ll have to ask your surgeon about your own restrictions and it’ll also depend on your healing, but typically the timeline goes like this:
5-7 days: may engage in ADL’s (“activities of daily living”; light housework, etc, provided not lifting more than 20-30 pounds)
7-10 days: may consider RTW (“return to work”, again with the above lifting limitations for 4-6 weeks)
2-4 weeks: may engage in light exercise/extra activity (dog-walking, etc)
4-6 weeks: may engage in moderate exercise (bicycle or treadmill, but no full exertion)
6+ weeks: full activity (including heavy lifting/jogging) generally OK
Generally, most people are back to their normal routine by 2-4 weeks. Overall, it generally takes 3 months for significant swelling to go down and 6-12 months for scars to mature/fade, but that isn’t something that folks will notice if you’re wearing a shirt!
Covid has made this a pretty unique year, so that also provides a few opportunities. If you’re able to do remote/online learning, you won’t have to explain anything because nobody would be able to tell from seeing you sit at a desk using a webcam. So you could always semi-disappear for the 2 weeks it takes to recover and say you were quarantining!
I took 2 weeks off from work after my top surgery in 2017, and when I went back to work (as a page at a public library) my coworkers who I hadn’t disclosed to didn’t know I had just gotten surgery. I didn’t take off my shirt to show my bandages and I didn’t need to like reach above my head so there weren’t any obvious mobility limitations even though I was still healing. I couldn’t lift things heavier than 30 pounds, but I didn’t need to so it didn’t come up.
So you might have to give an explanation to your school about why you need time off, but after you’ve had 2 weeks to recover, your classmates likely won’t realize anything is different and won’t ask questions as long as you don’t try to go to the weight room or something.
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I’m pretty sure the constitution says “the right to high-capacity magazines and automatically reloading weapons” shall not be infringed right?
like for real you still get to “bear arms” and that’s literally not being infringed upon when I bring up an assault rifle ban; you just don’t get to position yourself so you can commit a mass-murder at your whim aka own assault rifles.
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