the actual canonical narrative justification for house mistreating wilson for seemingly nothing in exchange during the early seasons is that house was simply accumulating a debt of good turns like chuck e cheese tickets that he cashes in as one singular Big Favour. like sorry for making you deal drugs to me and stealing your salads or whatever. I’ll make it up to you by killing myself in your honor at the end ❤️
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A healing stage is disgust. Yes, disgust.
You will be disgusted by the people whose love you sought. You will be embarrassed about the choices you made and the people who had access to you who didn't deserve it. And this is one of those things that helps you the most to move on because now you know ...like really KNOW... that you need to do better for yourself.
Feel this feeling and let it go. That will never be you again.
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I love you, it's ruining my life.
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sometimes, human psychology BAFFLES me with it inherent hypocrisy.
Like... You can get yourself to forgive a guy who tried to murder you (and NEARLY SUCCEEDED) because he feeds into your self-loathing and was going through a tough time.
But you can't bring yourself to forgive a guy who was basically your brother for giving something precious of yours to someone else because the person who got it is someone you hate, even though your brother was going through an arguably tougher time than the last guy, but you gave HIM a com to contact you and a notice of your location while ghosting the only guy who tried to include you in a family you FORCED YOURSELF INTO!
Tim forgave Jason easily because of his self-hate complex and resents Dick because of his Damian-hate complex. Technically he has every right to hate Damian, but the only reason he hates Damian for trying to kill him, and not Jason, is because JASON had a good enough excuse and Timmy's a fanboy.
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You know that feeling you get when you can really sense it in your gut that you're finally leaving behind people, places and things that you thought were impossible to let go of... not just a surface level feeling but an inner knowing; feeling that you're leaving someone(or something) behind and while it still hurts to think that way because it was something you wanted to work out so dearly , all those memories slowly going ghost and you might still have love for them ...like you could've held it tightly again but this time you don't want to,,,seeing it slip away feels more like a sense of liberation than hurt. And this time you really look forward to what's out there for you in the new...
...you know there's still a part of you left in that old narrative but it just doesn't matter anymore like it used to and you're finally at peace with letting it float away...
whatever you call it,,,it's amazingly peaceful.
So just hang in there🩷,,,you'll get to it too and I am sure you'd be fucking proud of yourself for everything you endured all alone.
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