#fake ah Ryan

[becausevyvyan]

i havent been in the rt/ah community in a couple years and im starting to come back in...can i have a debrief of who all the new people are? also the new fandom fahc lore, is vagabond gone completely in the fan stuff (?)

#i dont support ryan in the slightest btw #just wondering how ryan characters are treated like fahc ryan or ydyd ryan etc #achievement hunter #fake ah crew #fahc #ah #roosterteeth #rooster teeth #lets play

[everythingcanadian]

Rusted From The Rain

Pairing: Private Recording 1 Mentioned: Kat/Jeremy Hinted: Matt/Jeremy (Past Fake AH Crew, other ships up to you)

Rating: T for JRH I will tag him for others to filter

Warnings: Fake violence/GTA Violence, Car Accidents Mentioned, Ryan Haywood

Summary:

Jeremy had put to rest his alter ego, Rimmy Tim. Had accepted what had happened and had tried to move on and succeeded. Now he was back where the beginning of the end happened.

Day 20 of promptober: Rust I thought this was fitting to help myself heal after so long. I tagged that asshole so people can filter this out. This is more for me than anything. Title from Billy Talent's song "Rusted from the Rain" give it a listen if you want.

AO3 Portal Series Portal On Tumblr: Part 2

The shell of it was rusted and burnt out. The seats inside had been long ago stripped out and probably sold or cannibalised for parts. The engine was gone. Tires missing and the front left had melted from the crash. The headlights had moss and mould and mushrooms growing from them with the moisture and the fact it was the only thing on the car that hadn’t rusted. The hood was bent open, the whole front of the car had been crushed and bent. An old racing accident on the abandoned track. When they had found out what he had done to them. What he really was.

If one looked hard enough they could see the skid marks. The holes from bullets or grenades or rockets. From his spot leaning against the side of the rusted and useless Zentorno, he could feel the betrayal all over again. It wasn’t as bad now, jagged edges had healed somewhat, but it still hurt and probably would for the rest of his life. The black paint of the car had nearly melted off entirely in the blaze or a molotov aimed just right. But the husk of the low rider sat right where it was that day.

A simple red alert text on their phones had set it all off. Instead of a fun racing day they had an answer as to why some things never added up. Their connections into the FIB and police force had shown them their rat. He was more of a devil when they found out all that he had done.

Sitting here now made the ache behind his own ribs nearly unbearable. 

He took another calming puff of his cigarette and looked around again in the broad daylight. The sun was already low in the sky even though it wasn’t even dinner time. Oranges and reds and browns among the greens and blacks and greys. Autumn here had some sort of ethereal effect. It’s why they bought and built here. Now it was misty by the ditches and damp in his bones.

Three years and the little racing circuit was overgrown and sinking back into the earth bit by bit, year by year. It was fresh smelling now. Even with the October air burning his nose it was beautiful. The world he had left behind was slowly healing. 

His cigarette was a piss poor way to heat himself up from the inside. But it was a nice treat he didn’t indulge often. Maybe once a month if that. He didn’t smoke much anymore. Didn’t drink much either. Not since he ran with the crew. And especially not since he was revealed to be a traitor. They had disbanded pretty quickly after that. 

Jeremy didn’t do a lot of things he used to do. But that doesn’t mean he stopped all of it. Matt and him are still best friends. Still own a home together. Though now it’s a modest one in a quieter neighbourhood outside of the city of Los Santos. They had made many new friends. All from disbanded or low rung crews. Some new names came up that had help getting a foothold. Some old names that helped those new to the game up rather than beat them down. 

The royalty of the city and extended had fallen. There were no more kings of Los Santos. Fake AH was no more and it would never rise again. Safe houses were torched out. Bank accounts emptied and closed or transferred. Alternate identities erased. Paint jobs and costumes and familiar territories scraped, scrubbed, and scarpered. Photos burned along with files and hard-drives. 

Jack and Geoff, and even Ray, an old friend he had briefly worked with, had seen to it that a few of the more identifiable cars had found the bottom of the ocean. They had all been wiped off the map and chose to stay that way. All their pseudonyms- no longer used and put to rest. 

His leather jacket creaked as he shifted. His cell phone was ringing. Pulling it out of his jeans pocket he caught the name and smiled. He answered it and pressed the cold metal to his ear.

“Anthony. I’m where it all started to end.” He took another drag and looked out to where the sun would set in another couple hours. “You close?” He felt the mild lick of the Los Santos sun.

“Yeah, had to do a pick up. And don’t use my first name, sounds weird even now.” A pause and the sound of a turn signal in a car. “How are you guys right now?” The voice on the other end sounded warm and inviting. Among that clear sound was the soft murmurs of a couple new crew mates Jeremy had the pleasure of meeting and befriending.

Jeremy grinned, looking to where Matt and Ray were flying a drone to see what had become of the now cracked tarmac raceway. This was a meeting to assess the damage and see if it could be fixed. “I’m chilled to the bone.” 

A heavy sigh and a few laughs came from the line. “That joke was never funny. We’re turning onto the driveway now. See you shortly.” Chilled hung up with what sounded like a smile. 

Jeremy finished his smoke and stamped it out on the ground. Pushing his way off from the shell of a car. He dared not look at the blackened dashboard. Didn’t want to see his own initials matched with a traitor’s. 

Rimmy Tim might live again but not to the glory of what he was. No. Now he was in a new crew as well as an independent. He had a lovely wife who joined them from time to time. Who loved the carnage as much as he did, and still does. She was running her own job with a couple of the ladies. He had friends who he slept around with safely. Friends who loved him and checked on him regularly. He was slowly fitting back into his skin.

Jeremy smiled to himself and started walking toward his two nerds as they flew the drone. Ray held the tablet and gave little callouts as to what he saw. Matt flew the white personal drone and slowly surveyed the place. 

He broke off the rust from around his heart. He can take care of it with his new friends.

#rimmy tim #private recording 1 #fake ah crew #ryan haywood #he is the traitor #this is me healing alright let me live #promptober 2023 #promptober #fic #my fic

[blindmagdalena]

What do you think Homelander’s attraction to Becca was? It’s not like at the Christmas party she was the only woman there, and by that point he had no idea who Butcher was. The actress that plays her is attractive, but the later scenes (season two and even just their initial introduction) between them suggest there’s something more to his attraction.

It’s obvious in the season two scenes that Homelander and Becca have, he has some lingering attraction. I think that’s primarily led by the fact that they have a son together and Homelander desperately wants a family, and also that Homelander is looking for a new woman to attach himself onto since Madelyn died. Perhaps he just wants what he can’t have especially knowing that she’s still in love with Butcher and he wants someone to love him that unconditionally. The main reason I thought of this is because in my opinion, Homelander isn’t the type of character to do something without a reason. Usually he has one even if it’s not a good reason.

ah yes, potentially one of the most contentious/controversial plot points in the fandom. canon gives us VERY little to go on here, so excuse me while I just ramble my take on the whole situation. i extrapolate a good amount. everyone you ask is going to have a different answer, and each one is as valid as any other. this is simply mine!

Homelander's greatest sin isn't wrath or pride. It's envy. He is a bottomless well of yearning for what he doesn't have, and he is viciously covetous. We see this play out most plainly in his one sided beef with a literal baby.

When he meets Becca, she's beautiful, quick witted, strong willed and independent. A career woman. Not only that, she's helping manage his career by handing his social media, which is part of his public perception. Very important to him! He already has a ton of wires crossed when it comes to the women in his life acting as both coworkers/Vought employees and emotional surrogates, i.e. Maeve, Madelyn and Vogelbaum. Plus who knows how many nanny mommies.

At this point, we don't know how long he's been with Maeve, but we have at least another 6 years before the pair breaks up. He's enjoying Maeve, but he wants more. He always wants more. Maybe he wants a wife, and she's refusing him that.

But Becca is a wife. He sees that ring on her finger and it boils his blood that he doesn't have that classic, romantic symbol of commitment. Of love. Worse yet when he meets her husband! The figurative boogeyman. The baby stealing his mommy and her milk. We're not there in the story yet, but we do see a trend here. It likely didn't start here: imagine what it was like for him to find out Vogelbaum had kids. Kids he loved. I bet that gutted Homelander. It should have been him.

Homelander, in his mind, can never win. Can never have enough. Anyone else having means they are directly taking away what should be his. It could be that it was never really about Becca specifically so much as the archetype she represented.

That carries us into season 2 where Becca takes on an additional archetype that Homelander is now lacking: mother. I think you're right on the money that a good amount of his attraction comes from the fact she's the mother of his son.

He falls pretty deep down the fantasy family rabbit hole with Becca, though. He not only inserts himself into their lives and routine, he takes a renewed interest in Becca. He snoops through her things, smells her clothes, and engages with her well beyond just interacting with Ryan. Then comes the scene where he finds her hidden stash of Billy merch, and the fantasy is shattered. She's still in love with another man. She's a wife, but she's not his wife. She's the mother to his son, but she's not someone who will fulfill those emotional needs for him. I've made this comparison before, but it's very reminiscent to the breakdown he has when he sees his baby blanket in his fake childhood home. He moves on VERY easily to Stormfront when she not only presents herself as a mother to her own child, but a potential mother for his child.

I'm backtracking a little here, but when Maeve called Homelander over from Billy and Becca at the party, I always got the vibe she was doing so quite purposefully. I wonder how much of their early relationship was Maeve feeling like she was performing damage control. Managing him, curbing his destructive behaviors. Did she see that covetous edge in his eye when he would look at Becca, at her ring? Did she try to tell him to leave her alone, play it like a joke?

We have the deleted scene where Maeve says the reason they broke up was because he couldn't keep it in his tights, but we don't really have any other explicit instances or even mentions of Homelander liberally sleeping around. Did she know about Becca, or at the very least did she make an educated guess when the woman disappeared? Maybe she felt like he did it to spite her. Did she know about Madelyn?

Ultimately we know Maeve becomes complicit in his crimes. She feels her hands are dirty with the same blood. She becomes jaded, she's no longer the hero. She's just an accessory. I definitely don't think it started that way, though.

anyways, I hope this somewhat answered your question! I have a tendency to jump around a lot and word vomit, but this generally covers my take on why that all went down the way it did.

Honestly, I would love to write a fic someday that digs more into my thoughts here. Becca deserves so much more than what she got from the narrative.

#the boys meta #homelander meta #becca butcher #homelander #queen maeve #darling anon #ask and you shall receive #god i rambled sooo much here i'm sorry lol

[b4mpyre-k1zz3s]

Red Carpet Dreams

Y/N gets caught up in the chaos that is the premier for Jackass Number Two.

Johnny Knoxville X Gn!Reader

(Fluff)

2.9k Words

Warnings: Very suggestive content, crude language, drug use, alcohol, prostitutes, near drowning, partying (it’s Jackass), fake relationship, flirting, paparazzi

An: Aaaaaa!! I had so much fun with this one!! For all who sent in asks- thank you!! I’ve been writing a lot more recently and I’m working on more requests at the moment so look forward to them!! :)

“Hi! My name’s Katie Cordoba, and I’m here at the premiere of the new feature film, Jackass Number Two!” The red lipped, smizing news lady chattered into the camera, obviously feigning excitement. You rolled your eyes at the charade- four years ago, those Hollywood bigwigs would’ve turned up their noses at those guys, but now they’re all over it, as Johnny would put it to you, like flies on shit.

You blended in pretty well with the rest of the crowd, all eagerly looking around, waiting for the big Hollywood movie stars to make their appearances. It made you wonder what normal premieres were like, with everyone fully dressed, mostly sober, and generally law abiding. But just as you were mulling it over, the first guest was arriving.

As the car door popped open, Steve practically fell out, however the beer in his hand was miraculously unscathed as he tumbled to the cement, as was the cigarette hanging from his teeth. Getting to his feet, he didn’t even bother to pull up his pants that were now sitting about six inches below the waistband of his gray tartan Hanses. His skinny, shirtless body was bathed in a flurry of camera flashes, stroking his already swollen ego.

Following behind him, and catching you off guard, came a woman you had never seen before. Of course, people went wild over this, shoving microphones in his face from all angles. “Steve-O!! Steve-O, who is this dashing young woman you’re with?” The lady from before muscled past you, shoulder pads and all. “Well,” Steve wrapped an arm around her cockily, slurring his words, “this here is my girl, Trixie!” She giggled. The reporter lady probed more, “Oh, you two are just adorable!! How did you two meet?”

“I saw her on a street corner a few blocks from here!” He seemed to catch the reporter off guard, something stilling behind her eyes. Leave it to Steve to bring a prostitute to a movie premiere. You could hear her start to say something then stop. “Well, I, uh- I hope you two have a nice evening.” Steve grinned, taking a drag, “Oh, you know we will!” And there he went down the red carpet, giving her a firm slap on the ass.

Following behind him with that goofy smile was Chris, boasting one lady on each arm. To all your scrutinizing, they seemed perfectly normal, not paid by the hour women. He stood for a moment in his slacks and suit jacket, posing for paparazzi photos, beaming. He whispered something to one of the girls that made her eyes go wide before unbuttoning the jacket, taking it off and throwing it over his shoulder…and exposing his lack of a shirt. Of course, you weren't complaining, and judging by the excited roar that swept through the crowd, neither was anybody else. Turning to follow after Steve, he put an arm around each, “Let’s rock n roll, girls! Yeah!”

Another car pulled up, and Ryan walked out, cool as always behind those sunglasses. He didn’t even bother to dress himself up, wearing the same clothes he passed out in last night when you had to drag him back to the hotel from the bar. “Ah! Ryan! Tell us about the new movie!” Another interviewer held a boom mic out to him, a camera guy over his shoulder with one of those CRTV sized pieces that probably cost a year of your salary. He shot a look over you as he leaned against the metal rail nonchalantly. “I mean, this one- we decided to kinda take it in another direction. It's a sexual thriller, yeah. Oh, and while filming it, Knoxville died- horrible accident. He actually-“

Blindsiding him, Bam hurled a handful of flour at him, the cloud covering not just Ryan but anybody within a 3 foot radius, including the interviewer and, by extension, you. After accidentally inhaling some, you nearly hacked up a lung, the flour sticking to the inside of your throat like paste. Through the dense white cloud, you could barely make out Bam tackling Ryan to the ground, tumbling with him for a moment. As the dust cleared, Bam threw up the horns at one of the big cameras pointed in his face, yanking Ryan to his feet. As the two hauled ass down the carpet, leaving as soon as they arrived, Bam leaned down to pick up his board, which you didn’t even notice that he rode in on.

It had been about half an hour since the event had officially started, and your little starlet still hadn’t arrived. He was fashionably late, as usual- Knoxville didn’t do anything fast- the closest he got was doing speed. Bam would tell the media that Johnny wasn’t there because he punched the intern that got his Jamba Juice order wrong and they were bandaging his sore little knuckles, but it usually was from traffic. That seemed to be the case once again.

But when that shiny black limo pulled up, and Johnny stepped out with those glinting Crest teeth and his sharp Hollywood three piece suit, you almost forgot that he was the same man that you saw a month prior farting on Jeff with baby powder in his crack. Of course, everyone went wild at his mere presence, earning an appreciative chuckle from him as the crowd buzzed like a hive of bees. You smiled, not even caring that you were blinded by camera flashes that flanked you.

All of a sudden, you felt a hand grab your arm and pull. It took you a few panicked seconds for you to realize that you were on the carpet. Moreso, it took the warmth that was pressed against your back to murmur close to your ear for you to really get what was going on. “Just be cool, Y/N.”

Johnny’s head whipped back up, smirking back at the cameras while guiding you with his hand around your waist like nothing was out of the ordinary. You stared like a deer in headlights with a dumb smile on your face, finally understanding what it looked like from the other side of the barricade. And, of course, he just had to walk you over to that reporter lady, waving around her microphone like an idiot. “Johnny! Johnny- over here!” She feigned a smile, hiding exasperation, “We’ve seen so many, uh- lovely couples tonight, so I am just dying to know who you’ve got here!”

“Well this here is Y/N.” He pulled you closer, his hand grasping you near his torso again as he leaned down to the mic, his chin resting on your shoulder, “And they are allll mine, so don’t you fellas be ‘gettin any ideas!” He pointed to the cameras like he was addressing the viewers at home. You blushed, giggling at his joke that he obviously made to get you to loosen up. The lady beamed, convinced at your charade. “Wow! How long have you two been together?” Unable to come up with an idea, you leaned into Johnny, “You know, I actually think the movie’s starting soon! So we really have to go- sorry!” The lady nodded, saying something to the camera crew as you hustled through the doors. “You did so good there!” He excitedly patted you on the back as you got into the theater. “I had no idea what I was doing!”

“Hi! I'm Johnny Knoxville, and welcome to the premier of Jackass Number Two!” The packed theater cheered as Johnny spoke at the lectern, looking more like an actual movie star under the lights of the stage than he usually did in his dickies and t-shirts, the light glinting off of his glasses as he continued, “But…I would be remiss not to introduce the fine men that risked their lives- and livers- to make this film possible. Let’s bring ‘em out, boys!”

Like the most demented parade ever, they did. Starting with Steve, who came in walking on a pair of aluminum stilts. Though you knew he knew how to use him, he made a big show of looking like he was losing his balance, teetering for a moment before tipping stern first, landing flat on his face with a clatter and an, “Ah, fuck!” Snickering, Johnny feigned concern, turning to him, “Hey, you alright, Steve- O?” He laid there really still in the fetal position for a moment, the crowd holding with baited breath, before he gave a stiff nod.

In the midst of the horde cheering, you could hear music from somewhere in the theater. You, and maybe half the people in attendance , knew exactly what that meant. And while Steve was still there on the ground, groaning and fiddling with the leather straps of the stilts, in from stage right comes Mr. Party Boy himself. “Sounds like someone called for a party!” From your seat in the front row, you were actually close enough to catch the pair of tear away pants Pontius discarded as he stripped down to his silver mankini, dancing onstage. Giggling, you sat back in your seat, watching everything play out in front of you.

Oh, and did it play out. As the finale for the grand display, an orange blur flew in from one side of the stage- Dunn’s motorcycle. You were a little scared, having no idea how it got up there, but all you could do was stare However, it took him hitting the brakes hard, leaving an inky black skid mark on the wood, for you to notice Bam, who was getting pulled behind like he was water skiing on his skateboard.

He landed, sprawled on the laps of 3 different people in the front row, his board disappearing completely backstage. After the initial groan from the impact, he burst into laughter. He was about a seat or two away from you as he rolled off of the people, leaving them to sputter and straighten their suits and fancy dresses, muttering about how he dressed or what a roughian he was. “Dude!” He scrambled to his feet, grabbing your arm and yanking you up.

Before you knew it, you were up onstage, staring back at the packed theater. Goddamn it, it happened again. Johnny looked confused at what Bam did before he caught on, cackling. “Oh! Last, but not certainly least, Bam reminded me that we would all like to thank our very lovely manager, Y/N, for gettin’ us off our sorry asses so we could be here tonight!” Johnny pulled you in, his muscular arm firmly around your shoulders as the crowd roared in applause. You stared at the sight in front of you unbelievingly, wide eyed. Johnny chuckled. “Alright, let’s get this thing started!

And the premiere went great!! The audience loved the film from the title screen to when the credits rolled. When the theater wasn't nearly vibrating from laughs, it was full of gasps and cringing at some of the more painful moments. Hell, you heard a good handful of the vomit bags the red velvet clad ushers handed out at the door were filled by the end, which brought you a strange sense of pride.

The trouble came, however, with the after-party.

“Come oooon, Y/N!” Steve hung onto you as you two sat on the couch, his arm thrown over your shoulders. He was like a round vase, wobbling around even though he was sitting. “It's not that bad…Knoxville does this shit! Maybe if you tried some, you could get that damn stick outta your ass.” He looked up at you with pupils that eclipsed his irises, making him look eerie in the multicolor club lights. You rolled your eyes. “No way!” He looked at you adoringly, “He does, I swear.” Misinterpreting you, he giggled, “Hey- Hey. Have I ever told you that I love you?” Scoffing, you rolled your eyes, peeling his arm off of you. “Yeah, right. You’re just high.” He had a sort of feigned earnestness as he rambled, hushed and surprisingly coherent. “First of all- its MDMA. Second of all- I really do, baby! You’re, like- the love of my life. I wanna spend the rest of my life with you!” He was so distracted by talking that he didn’t even notice when you got up and walked over to Chris at the pool table. He just sat there, speaking to nobody in particular.

“Hey, Y/N! How’s it goi- aagh!” His speech was cut off as Chris got hit square in the balls with an 8 ball. It was certainly a sight, seeing him spread eagle on the green felt, wearing nothing but the silver mankini, his very exposed skin illuminated by the dim yellow ceiling lamp. “Oh shit! Are- are you okay?” Holding his crotch, he winced for a moment before falling over, tumbling to the side with a grin. He nodded, putting you at ease a little. You breathed a sigh of relief, “Well, Steve told me to tell you that he’s over on the couch if you wanna hang.” Not passing up at any opportunity to bro out, he headed over to him, smiling like a golden retriever.

Just as he left, your vision caught the pool from the corner of your eye. Since the party was held at the VIP suite of a hotel, the room had everything- of course the pool table, but you also had a deluxe lighting system, an open bar, and, of course, a private swimming pool. Curious and hot, you crept outside to investigate.

The second you opened the sliding glass door, you were drenched by a wave. Opening your eyes, you saw Bam in the pool, flipping his hair back as the people around him cheered. You’d later find out he did a ‘super badass gainer’, as he put it. The chlorinated water permitted your clothes, leaving you bitter and dripping wet as Bam laughed at you, finding this hilarious. Grumbling, you took a seat on one of the lounge chairs with a broken strap, dripping onto the pavement.

And just as you sat down, Ryan came waltzing by on the deck, clearly drunk off his ass as he dragged his feet. One minute, he was up and walking- the next? Plunk. In the water. He didn’t even try to swim up, just sort of sitting down there, bubbles rising from his lips down by the bright, medically white LED pool lights. If you weren’t so worried about him, you might say he looked like a peaceful wet specimen down there.

But your veiw of him was erased- ripples and splashes distorting the reflection of him as he was quickly hoisted out from under his shoulders. Of course, that's what it took for people to stop staring at Bam, being the attention whore he was. Ryan’s savior grinned, laying him out flat on the cement, “Now this is why you should always have a lifeguard on duty, boys and girls. That’s what I- Bunny the Lifeguard- am able to save this young man’s life. I’m just gonna perform a little mouth to mouth and he should be just fine!”

Just as Chris slowly leaned down, about an inch from his face- Pow! Ryan’s fist shot up, planting one on him square in the jaw as he lurched up, coughing up water and soaking his t-shirt for the second time that night. Once he got it all up, he sputtered out, “Holy shit- dude! Are you alright?” Pontius rubbed his jaw, wiggling it a little to try and get it back into place, still smiling, “Yeah, man!” He helped him to his feet like nothing happened, the two chuckling.

As the night grew darker, a breeze blew past you, making you shiver in your seat, ushering you back into the party, warm with bodies in motion. The music R&B- loud but dull, the kind that made the insides of your ears tickle. Leaning against the wall, you looked around you at the party, everyone flirting and talking and laughing. But your head just throbbed.

“Hey, sweetheart. Can I buy you a drink?” Your ears perked up at the sound of his voice as you head whipped around, your vision dark as your face landed firmly in the vintage t-shirt covering Johnny’s chest. “Woah there…little forward, are we?” You could feel the skin and muscle right beneath the fabric. It felt warm, comforting- nice, in a weird way. He grinned as you quickly pulled away. “I’m pretty sure this is an open bar.” He raised his eyebrows with a gleam of hope, “Well, what’s your poison?”

Johnny looked at you with sweet dark eyes as he glanced over his sunglasses, close enough that you could smell the booze on his breath, “I’m sure you’d be more comfortable in some dry clothes, baby. I got a real nice shirt you could wear.” You gulped down the liquid at the bottom of your red solo cup, his attempts at flirting getting less cringy as you got more drunk. “That’s cute. Hey, why aren’t you hangin’ with Steve? I’m sure he’d be happy to let you help him do lines off some dead hooker’s ass.” Your giggling at your own joke was quieted as he gently held your chin between his thumb and forefinger, turning you to face him.

“Y/N- If anything, I’d rather do lines off of yours. God knows you have a great one.”

#jackass #johnny knoxville #jackass fanfiction #jackass fanfic #fluff #jackass x reader #johnny knoxville x reader

[totaldrama-showdowns]

Submissions for the Non-Human Showdown! Including ones that are invalid!

Fang (x2)

“🦈🦈🦈”

“He's Fang ❤”

Cody Jr (x2)

“Cody Jr! No! Not Aunty Heather!”

Mr Coconut (x2)

“The og. Should have won every season /serious”

vince the alligator (x2)

“SWEEEEP”

“The lore… so immaculate”

the don box (x2)

“bzzz i have a stupid fucking clue for you. ah fuck the interns put me in a lame outfit again”

“what id don on about he's slaying in that shirt”

wt pineapple (x2)

“ALEPINEAPPLE FOREVER!!!”

“👅🐍🐍🐍🐍”

Irene the fish (x2)

“shes so beautiful i’d kiss her too”

“The final remaining member of Team Victory after DJs elimination, Irene went on to win the million and the hearts of many.”

the chrarry baby (x2)

“Goo goo gaa gaa”

“ive got my eye on u chris mclean”

Princess Beth Doll

“I WANT TO BUY ONE SO BAD IRL!!!!! Also, this too is yuri”

Old Jester from reboot S2ep9

“I love when Damien hugged him! That's scene is soooo cute. Also I love fluffy animal!”

Bobo :)

“SEASON 2 SPOILERS Bobo is the name of the bear that had the Raj mask in season 2 episode 12 :) idk I just think he’s silly”

DJ’s bunny

the Chris-shaped cake that Julia's group made

“I wanna eat that thang”

Dramarama Cody

“He's an alien”

Theodore (MK's stuffed unicorn)

(the arts and crafts) Shed (from season 1)

“shed sweep”

that evil little seal from wt

“sooo little and evil. who can hate him”

caleb rock

“possibly the best version of him out there”

the skull duncan carved for courtney

“you cant deny how iconic it was”

eva’s mp3 player

“the most important character in td history”

heather’s various hairstyles

“possibly the most diverse and versatile entity in td historu”

pahkitew island

“The best one”

Myself

“:^)”

ryan seacrests car

“very fast”

chef's car (total dramarama and gen 4)

“MY CAR!!!!!”

alien clone cody

“AAAAAAA*explodes into green goo*”

chris's wig

“wiggin”

heather's wig

“wiggin”

total drama yum yuk happy go time candy fish tails

“You ate it!”

trents five finger shirt

“5”

princess courtney CD

“all the greatest hits!”

owens butt

“fart”

anne maria’s hair style

“Ey im walkin here”

bridgettes surfboard

“BONK”

the fake antlers from the paintball ep

“Duncney”

manitobas fedora

“served!”

beary <3

“it’s LITERALLY beary”

ripper’s world record breaking fart

“he did it”

the portrait of cody as blue boy in wt

“funny looking”

sierra’s pizza box-cum-laptop*

“she uses the internet AND eats witj it. shes a genius”

*Mod Note: this refers to cum meaning: combined with; also used as (used to describe things with a dual nature or function).

waynes accent

“Eh we play hockey eh”

mal ventriloquist doll

“aaah im evil mal doll”

alejandro puppet

“we do a little trolling”

Chef 2.0

“He made him from a cashew”

Mt. Kīlauea

“She has the mercy to have her lava not hot enough to kill Alejandro, Ezekiel, and that random intern like... Everyone say "thank you" or somethin idk. Do you think she feels bad that Alejandro ended up in a robot suit because”

Immunity idol s4-5

“They ruined it's design in the reboot boooooooo”

MK's infernape

“Listen, she's a gamer and she's based. She would totally pick chimchar in bdsp. She probably hates people who tells her to "play platinum" because that was a game made for old people.

Try and exclude this submission, I dare you. There's nothing that says I can't submit theoretical non-humans. There's a non-zero chance that MK has an Infernape and I know it's been raised to have some awesome sneaky move. If you exclude this, I bet you'd allow "Mike's Torterra" because only a grass type fan would be a fire type and MK hater!!

Julia would keep her piplup unevolved and beat her console into tiny bits when she gets to Cynthia btw”

the drone of shame

“[picks up victim and flies away] wheeee”

that giant bowl of rice they fall into in japan

“mm giant bowl of rice”

noah’s dog

“his epic dog”

celine dion cardboard cutout

“love fucking wins #duncney”

the face huggers from Area 51

“rip tyler”

ezekiel MISSING milk carton

“Sad! He died.”

the eagle chris shot and killed

“someone arrest this man. again”

the confessional

“it’s always there for you”

geoff’s splinter

“OW”

the bread from codys pants

“man i need to rewatch island. i fucking love the pants bread”

That ice cream snowman from SMS

“LISTEN. JUST BECAUSE HE IS FROM THE EPISODE THAT SHALL NOT BE NAMED DOES NOT MEAN YOU CAN NOT GIVE HIM HIS RESPECT”

bear

“the one from raptear specifically. let's go lesbians”

that pizza chase threw the challenge for

“clearly he should be with it rather than emma. chemma? chipper? chazee? nope never fucking heard of them”

Momma's Spice

“*sprinkles it on op's head* mmmm tasty”

The Gilded Chris award

WT barf bags

“give a real f to those guys. never appeared after episode 7.”

the toxic marshmallow of loserdom

“killer of staci's hair”

The lavatory confessional

“bitch is iconic. 6/8 is a passing mark!!!”

Courtney's PDA

“why wouldnt they call it a phone idk but its so camp”

The Cassowaries

“Male cassowaries are responsible for raising the young. We love an involved father.”

Fire-breathing winged mountain goats

“You could make an Undertale reference with this (also they're really cool)”

Giant Beetle

“Dott shippers will like this one”

Mutated Maggots

“They're pretty cute!”

Six-Legged Rats

“ADORABLE EEEEEEEP!!!!”

scott bird

“what a beautiful bird”

Chef's car

“It may play a role in mkulia canon”

Gethin

that rainbow porridge in episode 8 of the reboot

“aw hell naw chris cookin up the gay porridge”

The cassowary that fell in love with Zee

“We love an iconic single mother looking for love”

The rat in the cargo hold that appears on screen for 0.5 seconds during Ezekiel's solo in "Come Fly With Us"

“That rat really carried the whole song. Iconic. Astounding. Never before seen talent. Lady Gaga is shaking in her Demonias.”

The Erymanthian Boar

“It wrecked Duncan's shit in Greece.”

The dock of shame

“So many teens walked on her, i think she deserves some recognizion”

gwen's blender necklace

Zoey's hamster (Miss Puffycheeks)

“It's cute and can punch a cat, need I say more?”

#nonhuman showdown #unused submissions

[strawbs-screaming]

the boxers during christmas

merry crisis! ❤️ i am mentally losing it!

Glass Joe

- baking gingerbread men themed after the other boxers

- went iceskating and accidentally got a medal

- going ornament shopping for the christmas tree

- baking up a feast for everyone, hes trying to get on the nice list this year hes got enough coal to fuel 30 trains

Von Kaiser

- reading christmas stories for Mac next to the fireplace

- attempted to bake and accidentally set himself on fire, hes banned from the kitchen now

- scolding anyone messing with the advent calendar

Disco Kid

- keeps doing a mariah carey impression and screaming "ITS TIME!!!"

- making a christmas playlist for everyone

- decorating the place on the least safe ladder ever, its shaky, rusty, old and on the verge of breaking down just like the average old person!

King Hippo

- eating all the advent calendar chocolate in one sitting

- bit a christmas tree ornament since he thought it looked nice

- ate the missletoe since he mistaked it for berries (i am not spelling that right send help)

- hes just hibernating until the new year

Piston Hondo

- making hot cocoa for everyone

- caught a cold but faking it to not break the holiday spirit

- slowly going insane because of Disco Kid blasting christmas music

Bear Hugger

-chopped down a entire ass tree just for decorating it, unfortunately some of the boxers have some allergies (*COUGH COUGH* joe - *COUGH COUGH*) so it didnt go great

- buying dumb hats for everyone

- making some cranberry juice for the group

- mrs bear came over to have dinner with them at one point, She even brought some decorations and food!! How kind of her!!

Great Tiger

- broke some bones while climbing a wall to decorate the roof, ouch

- Really feeling the cranberry juice, thats some good shit

- the christmas lights make him a bit dizzy but trying to tough it out

Don Flamenco

- setting up missletoes EVERYWHERE. oh you want to have some cookies? Just move past the missletoe IN THE KITCHEN!! Need to shower? just ignore the missletoe in the shower cabin and you'll be set! YOU CANNOT ESCAPE THE KISSING!!

- watching christmas movies and getting all joyful before getting another christmas ornament thrown at him by aran

- "Ah, isnt christmas so wonderful?– (BONK)"

Aran Ryan

- chucking christmas ornaments at everyone, he thinks it makes a funny sound

- hes getting coal this year 100%

- eating raw dough as usual (but in a festive way)

Soda Popinski

- hes just planning go sleep during the countdown so he can say "ive slept for a year!!"

- adding gingerbread & cinnamon to EVERYTHİNG. Soda pls stop eating omelettes with cinnamon

- keeps making shitty puns

Bald Bull

- doing the dissapointment mom sigh anytime someone makes a christmas pun

- scolding Disco for the shitty ladder hes using

- freezing his ass off but trying to pretend nothing is going on

Super Macho Man

- Just taking pictures for his posts

- overdecorating everythin:, bright lights, shiny decorations and enough snowmen to make an army

- adding too much sugar to his hot choco

Mr Sandman

- wearing a silly little christmas sweater & santa hat, hes a bit jolly, whimsy even

- had the bright idea of dressing up Mac as a elf

- went on a emergency ingredient run after Joe ran out of frosting & flour

#punch out #headcanon #punch out wii #punch out headcanons #aran ryan #bald bull #don flamenco #glass joe #piston hondo #great tiger #all i want for christmas issss.. NEW PUNCH OUT CONTENT NINTENDO FEED US WE WANT TO SEE THE LIGHT #<- and Joe in a baguette costume but thats not very important considering my first wish

[drylan]

rylan ghostface AU

No. It couldn't be him, it couldn't. There's just...no way. No fucking away.

Kaitlyn looked on in horror as Ryan's face widened into a glistening, almost unnatural smile that she had never seen. His dark t-shirt edged with blood, fake or real she could not tell, and a knife twirling in his hands.

"R-Ryan...how could you?" Kaitlyn gasped, hand over her mouth, shaking as he loomed in closer. There was no where else to run. "Emma...a-and Jacob. Nick, too?"

"Ah, well, Nick wasn't me." Ryan offered casually.

"...what? But..." That didn't make any sense.

Until she heard the thump of languid, heavy steps followed. How bizarre, in that moment, that she knew exactly who those footsteps belonged to.

"C'mon, Kaitlyn...I thought you were smarter than that." Dylan laughed, draping himself over Ryan's back, head on his shoulder. "Nick was just as much part of the prank that cost me my hand as Emma and Jacob, so...he had to be dealt with, too."

Dylan winked and kissed the side of Ryan's face, smearing the redness onto his own lips and laughing.

Kaitlyn could do nothing but watch in horror.

"You understand, yeah?"

No.

She didn't.

And that would be her downfall, too.

#been a while since i've seen scream but here you go #nice to meet you queue. i'm ryan ryan. #the quarry #fanfic #ficlet #ryan erzahler #dylan lenivy #drylan #rylan #radioheads #kaitlyn ka

[sapphiccharacterstournament]

Canon Sapphic Characters Tournament Round One (Bracket 2) Master Post

Gabrielle (X:WP) vs. Tara McClay (BTVS)

Kit Tanthalos (Willow) vs. Mulan (OUAT)

Ryan Wilder (Batwoman) vs. Nyssa al Ghul (Arrow)

Mel Vera (Charmed) vs. Isobel Evans (Roswell New Mexico)

Bambi (Minx) vs. Flower (Ghosts)

Amy Raudenfeld (Faking It) vs. Emily Fields (PLL)

Nicky Nichols (OITNB) vs. Marjorie Palmiotti (Veep)

Eve Polastri (Killing Eve) vs. Luisa Alver (JTV)

Sameen Shaw (POI) vs. Kelly Booth (Black Mirror)

Raffi Musiker (ST: PIC) vs. Camina Drummer (The Expanse)

Lana Winters (AHS) vs. Ally Mayfair-Richards (AHS)

Moira Strand (Handmaid's Tale) vs. Poussey Washington (OITNB)

Della Street (Perry Mason) vs. Blanche Mottershead (Upstairs Downstairs)

Max Chapman (ALOTO) vs. Max (Black Sails)

Kalinda Sharma (The Good Wife) vs. Laura Peterson (TMS)

Taissa Turner (Yellowjackets) vs. Alana Bloom (Hannibal)

#xena warrior princess #buffy the vampire slayer #btvs #yellowjackets #killing eve #the morning show #poi #person of interest #once upon a time #ouat #jane the virgin #star trek #tara maclay #eve polastri #taissa turner #sameen shaw #canon sapphic characters poll #tumblr tournament #sapphic #wlw #lesbian #bisexual

[koreofkore]

Pilot episode | chapter 1

ᥲsᥱᥒᥲ іs іᥒ 𝖿᥆r ᥲ sᥙr⍴rіsᥱ ᥕһᥱᥒ ᥲ ᥴһіᥣძ kᥒ᥆ᥴks ᥆ᥒ һᥱr ძ᥆᥆r ᥴᥣᥲіmіᥒg 𝗍᥆ ᑲᥱ һᥱrs.

╬╬═════════════╬╬

Fairytale world

Prince Charming (Tony) rode on his horse along the stretch of the land towards a forest. In the forest, he meets seven dwarves gathered around a glass coffin. "You're to late." Wong says. He looks at Pepper in the coffin. Her skin pale and her chest unmoving. "No. No! Open it." He ordered. "I'm sorry, she's gone." Strange said mornfully. "At least let me say goodbye." Tony begged.

All seven men remove the glass top. Tony leans down and kisses her lips and a wave of magic pulses throughout the kingdom. No one notices except the birds that leave the branches they perched on. Pepper wakes up with a gasp. "You... You found me." She said breathlessly. "Did you ever doubt I would?" Tony asked her. "Truthfully, the glass coffin gave me pause." She joked.

"Well, you never have to worry. I will always find you." He assured. "Do you promise?" She asked. "I do." Tony says at their wedding. "And do you, Pepper Potts, promise to take this man to be your husband, and love him for all eternity?' The priest asked. " I do she says. " I now pronounce you husband and wife." The priest says. Everyone applauds and cheers. Pepper and Tony lean to kiss each other when the ballroom doors swing open by a magical force. "Sorry I'm late." The red head stated.

She goes to approach the newlyweds and the guards try to stop her. She flings them away with magic. "It's the Queen. Run!" Someone in the crowd yells. "She's not the queen anymore. She's nothing more than a evil witch." Pepper said grabbed her husbands sword pointing it at her.

"No, no, no. Don't stoop to her level. There's no need." He consoles. Tony takes his sword from her. "You're wasting your time. You've already lost. And I will not let you ruin this wedding." Tony said. "Oh, I haven't come here to ruin anything. On the contrary, dear, I've come to offer you a gift." Natasha smiles. "We want nothing from you." Pepper says in anger.

"But you shall have it! My gift to you is this happy, happy day. But tomorrow my real work begins. You've made your vows, now I make mine. Soon everything you love, everything all of you love, will be taken from you. Forever. And out of your suffering, will rise my victory. I shall destroy your happiness if it is the last thing I do." Natasha turns around after her speech and heads for the door.

"Hey!" Tony calls after her. Natasha turns and he launched his sword at her. She disappears in a puff of black smoke letting the sword crash on the ground.

The real world

A young girl Yelena is seen with a book that contains illustrations of Tony and Pepper on the page. She's seen getting on a bus to Boston. "That a good book?" An elderly woman asked. "This? Is more than a book." The young girl says her little accent coming out. "Oh?" She asked.

Boston, south station. "Thank you for riding Greyhound." The bus announcer said. Yelena gets off the bus and finds a taxi. "You take credit cards?" She asked holding up the card. "Where to, chief?" The driver asked.

╬╬═════════════╬╬

Asena sat in a restaurant waiting on her target to come for their 'date'. She takes a sip of wine knowing that she'd need it. She wore a pink dress with matching heels and her hair was curly. She sat crossed leg to stop her shaking. To be honest she was scared the guy wouldn't show. But he finally did. "Asena." He greeted.

"Ryan? You looked relieved." She said. "Well, it is the internet. Pictures can be..." He pauses trying to find the right word. "Fake, outdated. Stolen from a Victoria's Secret catalogue." She finished.

He nodded. "Sorry I'm late by the way." He says sitting down in the seat across from her after they greeted each other. "It's totally fine." She replied with a forced smile. "So... Um... Tell me something about yourself, Asena?" He asked nervously. "Oh. Ah, well, today's my birthday." She answered. "And you're spending it with me! What about your friends?" He asked.

𝐓𝐫𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐦𝐞 𝐈'𝐝 𝐦𝐮𝐜𝐡 𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐛𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐭𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐬 𝐨𝐧 𝐦𝐲 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐜𝐡 𝐝𝐫𝐨𝐰𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐦𝐲 𝐬𝐨𝐫𝐫𝐨𝐰𝐬 𝐢𝐧 𝐒𝐜𝐨𝐭𝐜𝐡 𝐨𝐫 𝐕𝐨𝐝𝐤𝐚. She thought.

"Kind of a loner." She answered. "And, you don't like your family?" He asked. 𝐈 𝐝𝐨𝐧'𝐭 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞. She thinks holding her facade.

"No family to like." She said taking another sip of wine. "Oh, come on. Everyone has family." Ryan says. "Technically, yeah. And everyone knows who they are? Ready to run yet?" She replied. "Oh not a chance. You, Asena, are by far, the sexiest, friendless orphan I have ever met." He said.

𝐖𝐚𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐬𝐮𝐩𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐦𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐦𝐞 𝐬𝐰𝐨𝐨𝐧? 𝐋𝐞𝐭'𝐬 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐠𝐞𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡. She thought. "Okay. Your turn. No wait let me guess. Umm... You are handsome, charming." She started internally gaging. "Go on." Ryan says.

"The kind of guy who— now stop me if I get this wrong — embezzled your former employer, got arrested, and skipped town before they could throw your ass in jail." She fake laughed. "What?" The man asked playing dumb. "And the worst part of all is your wife. Your wife loves you so much that she bailed you out, and how do you repay that loyalty? You're on a date." She finished off.

"Who are you?" The man asked. "The chick that put up the rest of the money." Asena answers. " You're a bails bondsman." Ryan realized. "Bail bondsperson." She corrected. Ryan flipped the table spilling everything on her and took off running. "Bloody Hell!" She groans.

Ryan runs across the street dodging cars and Asena just casually walks through traffic. He tries to start the ignition and looks to find a boot on his tire. "You don't have to do this, okay? I can pay you. I got money." Ryan bargained. "No, you don't. And if you did, you should give it to your wife and take care of your family." Asena said crossing her arms.

"The hell do you know about family, huh?" The man asked. "Nothing." She replied smashing his head against t he steering wheel. When Asena arrived home she kicks off her heels walked to the kitchen. She grabbed a bottle of Scotch and opened a box with a cupcake inside.

She opens the bottle and then puts a star shaped candle in the cupcake. "Another loner year." She lights it then closes her eyes and makes a wish. Theres a knock on the door and Asenas head snapped to it. She opens the door and sees a child. "Are you Asena Montgomery?" She asked. "Yeah?" She answered skeptically. "I'm Yelena and I'm your daughter." The younger blonde says. Yelena pushes past her and into the apartment. "Woah! Hey, kid! Kid! Kid! I don't have a daughter! Where are your parents?" Asena asked.

"Ten years ago. Did you give up a baby for adoption? That was me." Yelena explained. "... Give me a minute." The woman said going to the bathroom. She looked at herself in the mirror trying to compose herself. She didn't think that her past would catch up with her ten years later. Plus how could that little girl know that she was her mother?

She had a closed adoption which meant the kid shouldn't even know that she existed. "Hey do you have any juice? Never mind, found some." Yelena hollered from the kitchen. Asena leaves the bathroom after taking a deep breath. She sees the little girl drinking her orange juice straight from the bottle. "Gross." She said taking the bottle from the child. "You know, we should probably get going." Yelena realizes.

"Going where?" Asena asked confused. "I want you to come home with me." Yelena clarified. "Okay, kid. I'm calling the cops." Asena picked up her phone. "Then I'll tell them you kidnapped me." Yelena fired back. "And they'll believe you because I'm your birth mother." Asena huffed in realization. "Yep." The child hummed. "Fair played, but you and I both know you aren't gonna do that." Asena tilted her head in protest.

"Try me." The ten year old challenges. "You're pretty good. But here's the thing, there's a lot I'm good at and a hell of a lot I'm terrible at in life. I have 840 confirmed kills so murder obviously isn't one of them. Let's call it a superpower. I can tell when anyone's lying and you, kid, are." Asena explained to the girl. "Wait... Please don't call the cops. Please come home with me." Yelena begged.

"Where do you live?" Asena sighed. "Storybrooke, Maine." Yelena said. "Storybrooke? Are you serious?" Asena asked. Yelena hummed and nodded. "Alright then." Asena rubbed her temples.

Fairytale world

In the castle in the forest Pepper stood near the balcony, and a bluebird lands on her finger. "What's wrong?" Tony asked. "Nothing" Pepper snapped out of her daze. "You're thinking about what the Queen said again, aren't you? Pepper, please. I can't keep having this conversation. You have to let it go. We're about to have a baby." Pepper turns her head ashamed of being caught thinking about the threat.

She had agreed to try and move past that but how do you move past something like that, especially after you know that she will be true to her word. Pepper knew that Natasha would try everything in her power to take away her happiness. "I haven't had a restful night since our wedding." Pepper pointed out. And it was the truth, she hadn't slept well at all she felt as if she had to look over her shoulder consistently again. "That's what she wants - to get in your head. But they're only words. She can't hurt us." Tony reassured pulling her in.

"She poisoned an apple because the thought i was prettier than her. You have no idea what she's capable of." Pepper argued pulling out of his hold. He didn't get it and she needed him to get it. This woman has made her life hell for years. Natasha has had it out for her and wanted to see her dead and now this. " What can I do to ease your mind?" Tony asked starting to realize that he wasn't going to win this argument and that she wouldn't sleep until she got some type of clarity.

"Let me talk to him." Pepper answered. He was the only one who could give her that reassurance that her child would be safe. "Him? You don't mean..." Tony asked with a hint of fear. "I do." Pepper answered back with a look of determination. "No, no, no. It's too dangerous." Tony shut down the idea immedi ately. She couldn't be serious. She knew how dangerous he was. "He sees the future." Pepper points out. Tony made a face. He was scared he would admit that to no one but himself because he had to be strong for Pepper.

But that didn't mean he wanted help from the person he helped trap. that was suicide. "There's a reason he's locked up." Tony said logically. Pepper placed a hand on her swollen stomach. "Can you promise me that our child will be safe? Can you guarantee it? Because he can." Pepper questioned. The look on Pepper's face was enough to make him cave. Seeing her look so unlike her normal fearless self. "Alright. For our child." Pepper smiled in relief and Tony leaned in for a kiss. She had no idea how much power she had over him, and maybe that was a good thing.

Real world

Asena and Yelena were driving and the former had no idea what time it was. The drive was silent for the most part until Yelena broke it. "I'm hungry. Can we stop somewhere?" The girl asked. "This isn't a road trip kid. We aren't stopping for snacks." Asena replied. Yelena closed her book. "Why not?" She pestered. She was hungry she could feel her stomach growling.

She could also tell that they were close to home and she wasn't ready to go back yet. "Quit complaining, Kid. Remember i could've easily put your ass on a bus and let you go the same way you came." Asena said annoyed slightly. "You know i have a name right? It's Yelena." The blonde child pouted before opening her book again. "What's that." Asena asked just now noticing the big old looking book. "I'm not sure you're ready." Yelena flips through the pages. "Not ready for what? A bunch of fairytales?" Asena questioned scrunching up her face.

Yelena makes a face. These weren't just fairytales they were a truth and even if they were which she was pretty sure they weren't, they were a history, her history. "They aren't just fairytales they are a truth. Every story in this book is a truth, someone's truth. Every story in this book actually happened." Yelena deadpanned. "Of course they did." Asena sighed. It was a long night and this kid has made it longer. Yelena on the other hand was just huffing. How dare she not take her seriously.

"I know I sound crazy, but use your superpower, see if I'm lying." Yelena dared. Asena did and the girl was telling the truth. She wasn't about to let this kid slide though. "Just because you believe in something doesn't make it true. " Asena looked over at the page. "Uh no that's exactly what makes it true. You would know more than I would." Yelena scans through a page. "Oh really now? Why is that?" Asena asked. "Because you're in this book." Yelena flipped to the next page

"You have problems." Asena chuckles. This kid was crazy but so was she so she had no room to say anything. "Yep. And you're going to fix them." Yelena snorted. Asena laughed before switching lanes.

Enchanted Forest

Pepper and Tony are walking behind a guard with cloaks on their heads. The guard has a torch in his hand and he stops them just before they get to the cell. "When we reach the cell, stay out of the light. And whatever you do, do not let him know your name. If he knows your name, he wil have power over you." The guard warns, Pepper and Tony nod at him. "Loki. Loki! I have a question for you." The guard calls to the man in the cell.

Loki comes out of the shadows of the cell. "No, you don't They do. Pepper Potts and Tony Stark..." Loki rasped coming closer to the bars of the cell. "You insult my abilities. Step into the light and take off those ridiculous robes they don't suit you." Loki beckoned.

Pepper and Tony step into the light and slowly lower their hoods to reveal themselves. "Much better." Loki praises. "We've come to you about the..." Tony started before he was cut off. "Yes, yes, you idiot i know why you're here. You want to know about the queen's threat." Loki giggled before turning to the walls of the cell. "Tell us what you know and skip all the taunting." Tony deadpanned.

Loki was finding this amusing he could tell they were desperate. "Ooh tense, are we? Fear not! I can ease your mind. But... It's going to cost you something." Loki was playing with them he wanted nothing big they couldn't give him what he really wanted. Toying with them would be easy. "No he's just a waste of time." Tony turned to leave and Loki faked offence. "What do you want?" Pepper stepped forward and Tony spun around quickly. "Oh...The name of your unborn child." Loki said leaning against the stone of the wall with his arms crossed. "Absolutely not!" Tony protested.

"Deal! What do you know?" Pepper rushed out quickly. She needed to know she didn't have time for Tony's paranoia. Loki giggles and says, "The queen has created a powerful curse. And it's coming. Soon, you'll all be in a prison. Just like me only worse. Your prison, all of our prisons, will be time. Time will stop, and we will be trapped. Someplace horrible, where everything we hold dear, everything we love, will be ripped from us while we suffer for eternity. While the Queen celebrates, victorious at last. No more happy endings." Loki explains with a smile on his face. He laughs at the fact that they remain absolutely clueless and the fear that he could feel radiating from them. "What can we do?" Pepper asked with a sense of dread in her chest.

She was scared of the answer, well not the answer an answer one that could break her heart. "We can't do anything." Loki emphasizes the we. Because in truth they couldn't there was nothing Pepper, himself, Tony could do. "Who can?" Pepper asked again with that same feeling of dread. "That little thing, growing inside your belly. " Loki moves his hand, in a gesture, towards Pepper's stomach. Tony draws his sword quickly and slashes at his hand. "Hands off reindeer games. Next time I cut it off." Tony sheathed his sword and placed a hand on his wife's lower back. Loki tsks and glances at his hand. "The infant is our only hope. Get the child to safety. Get the child to safety and Ion it's twenty-eighth birthday, the child will return. The child will find you and the final battle will begin." Loki says in a sing song voice before spinning on his heel and moving away from the bars.

Tony didn't like that answer and he made it clear by saying, "We've heard enough. We're leaving." And he guided Pepper to the exit. "Hey! No! We made a deal! I want her name! We had a deal! I need her name! I want her name!" Loki growls and angrily hits the bars. "Her? It's a boy." Tony rests his hand on Pepper's bump. "Missy... Missy... You know I'm right. Tell me, what's her name?" Loki asked in a much more calmer voice. "Asena. Her name is Asena." Pepper sighed and started to walk again. "Asena..." Loki mumbled.

#natasha romanoff x reader #natasha x you #ouat au #Swanqueenau #natasha romanoff x oc #Enchantment au #Enchantment fic:

[jinlizz-dragondrama]

Chapter 4

Mystic Mayhem

"So um Cannonballing into a pool huh?"  I say

April rubs the back of her neck and smiles

"I'll invite you next time" she laughs awkwardly

"April aren't you gonna introduce us?" The orange turtle says

I turn my attention to the group of turtles and smiles shyly. April turns towards them and starts to name and point each turtle out.

"This orange ball of sunshine here is Mikey" Mikey excitedly waves at me and his bubbly energy helps me relax a bit. "This big red teddy bear here is Raph" Raph gives me a small smile with one fang sticking out which I find adorable. "This is-" Before she could finish the blue turtle jumped in front of her and grabs my hand and kisses it. "I'm Leonardo the most popular turtle" He chuckles. "And well...this is Donnie," she says awkwardly pointing to the purple turtle that's busy typing away on his tech gauntlet.

I quirk a brow at her and look between the purple turtle and April. I get an idea, pulling out my phone I shoot a text to Othello.

Me: Would I look better in a lavender shirt or a violet one?

I quickly send it and side eye to see the turtle's reaction. Luckily for me, his phone was on ring and he almost jumps out of his skin while he tries to answer the phone. Trying to hold back a laugh I watch as his green cheeks dust with a shade of pink. That was then I knew I had my man...turtle...

"Ah hah, I knew you sounded familiar Othello Van Ryan," I say while crossing my arms.

"Har har, you caught me. What do you want a medal?"

"Nah your expression was enough of a win for me"

He starts to sputter and waves his arms about trying to think of a rebuttal but I cut him off.

"So you guys are the ones that have been on the news recently, nice to meet yall in person."

"Yea, we're like internet famous...." Mikey shouts and a bead of sweat rolls down the side of his head when he sees his brothers glaring at him.

"Which is not a good...thing?" He continues

I chuckle a bit and smile at the group.

"Well your secret is safe with me".

"Alright crew time to hit the court, let's have some fun. Donnie can I hitch a ride?" April says

"No Probabls" he says while activating his purple protective shell thing.

"No way!! I say excitedly (Picture your pupils turning into stars from how awesome that looked)

Everyone jumps off the roof while Donnie hovers, I jump off behind them but it seems like Raph became distracted by something because he crashed into a brick wall. He points to a weirdly cute creature that is shivering from fear we all jump down to investigate. After Raoh attempts to make friends with it and proceeds to claw to oblivion, the little cat...dog...creature jumps into April's arms and locks her affectionately. I walk over giving it some neck scratches and it runs its head into my palm.

"Awwwww" I instantly pull out my phone to take a picture of the little guy. All of a sudden some freakishly huge men with baby carriers on their chest with puppies appear. The turtles hide behind April and me and seek to go over a skit of sorts for when they encounter humans. But sadly that didn't work out for them, especially with Donnie's awkward one-liner. I couldn't help but face Palm from secondhand embarrassment.

"You do not intimidate us with or without your fake earth voices" one of the thugs said

"That was actually my real voice," Donnie said with his arms crossed

"Well yea, you better get intimidated because we are like nothing you've ever seen!" Raph adds

"What's wrong with my voice?" Donnie says sounding slightly hurt

Soon the thugs turn into armored warriors and the dogs turned into ferrous beasts. Donnie pushes me behind him protectively but gets hit with a purple glowy wave and we get knocked into some bricks. I groan in pain and try to push Donnie off of me. After some....fighting? Mostly butt whopping and getting knocked around by several turtles being thrown at you the dog/cat creature was captured and was taken through a portal on a wall. Also, a poor delivery guy fell victim to the portal....and went down the depths. (get it fell...anyway) April runs after it and the portal closes behind her before I can jump in after her.

We try to figure out out to open the portal again but to no avail. Mikey realizes that they've seen the insignia before and we make our way to their lair. Which was surprisingly in the sewers...gross. After I was instructed to wait behind the lazy boy recliner while the turtles tried to get their father to leave the living room to swine the artifact. But they fail to get him to leave but thankfully he passes out not long after and I was able to grab it while Raph was coming up with a very interesting plan.

"Got it!" I said excitedly

"Wait how did you get it?" Raoh says shocked.

"He passed out from some cake and milk, the best way to go. Now let's go get April and that cute creature"

We make our way back to the lone standing brick wall and Raph tries to figure out how to open the portal. The boys continue to talk about Raph's capabilities and fear stink? Never heard of that one but eh I can see what they were talking about. Mikey however was able to open it, we jumped through the electric blue portal and finally land on solid ground. We'll the boys fell hard onto the ground while Leo was able to land "safely" until I crash-landed into him.

"Thanks for cushioning my fall, Leo"

He gives me a weak thumbs-up while I stand up and brush myself off. I look around a see a bunch of unknown creatures swimming in midair and just casually walking around us. We hear April whisper to us and we rush towards her. She explains to us that we are in a Mysticated City deep under New York and pointed to where the dog thingy is being held.

We hide in an upper level of the lair and Donnie gushes over the color scheme. I chuckle I perk over the edge to see that the dog/cat creature is being held in some sort of cage that's stopping it from teleporting and the delivery guy is also in a cage. A tall goat man enters the lair with two gargoyle creatures on each shoulder and yanks the green vial from the creature and pours it into a machine that holds some sort of mosquito bug-like creatures. They drink the green mixture and one is released from the chamber and placed on the delivery man who I'm able to see his name is Stewart. It bites him and he soon transforms into a Fishman, I had to cover my mouth to stop myself from gagging. Newly transformed Stewart runs out of the lair.

"Yep jury's in that was Imitation crab" Donnie said nonchalantly as we glare at him.

"The mutation worked just like it did all those years ago," the goatman says

"Mutation? You mean like us? Could we be-" Raph questioned

"Part Imitation crab!" Mikey interjects

Donnie awkwardly chuckles at that statement but realizes that his brother wasn't kidding. April directs us to a room full of weapons, she quickly pulls a lever, and before I could scream we end up falling through the floor and into a weapons room.

"Oh, it's like if science and magic had a baby!" Donnie said excitedly

The brothers soon start to look around for their weapons of choice. But Raph points out some glowy weapons. Raph, Mikey, and Leo grab weapons but April asks Donnie if he wants a glowy weapon too. But Donnie is too infatuated with his tech bo to grab one but he yonks a glowy purple piece of a gem? April then walks over to me asking if I want one, but I pull out my titanium fans and it makes a slicing noise when I open them.

"No thanks, I think I'm good," I say while my weapon glows a light pink. Donnie looks at me slightly impressed but I don't notice.

We interrupt Mr. Goatmans evil monologue by falling through a pipe. April and I land on top of the boys. While Raph and the boys are arguing the Incredibly Unusually Buff Bookworm is staring at them in awe. But April impatiently jumps onto the cage and starts attacking it trying to get the dog thingy out. We freak out at how she just jumped into action without any hesitation. But she's whisked away by the two gargoyles and she's swinging away at them. We are then attacked by purple-pink-looking tentacles, jumping on them and running toward the goatman. But he throws some sort of seed pods into the ground, a giant Iron Man-looking creature grows and yanks the tentacles from under us and we crash into the floor with a thud. Running into the action Leo cuts off the iron flesh man's leg, but it throws huge chunks of rock at us and we jump from rock to rock avoiding them. Mikey wraps his glowy whip around Raph and throws him into the giant's face knocking it to the ground. Donnie activates his hover wings from his shell and turns on his Tech bo and the sides turn to rockets but unluckily for him it spins him around which in turn spins him around and he lets it go. While it's spinning around Leo, Raph, and Mikey dodges out of the way, but I grab on and when it smacks the giant in the face I slice it with my fans and it appears as a huge pink crescent that cuts it. I land on the floor and stumble backward onto my butt. Mid-slice it spins around from both the force of the bo and my cut. Donnie quickly catches his Bo and takes a selfie (honestly same lol 😆).

He lands on the rubble and while the Goatman is evil monologuing completely ignores him, while everyone else is trying to get their bearings. Poor April is still being flown around by the gargoyles and going strong with her whacks on them, seeing that she can handle herself. We found out the Goatmans name is Baron Draxum and he isn't surrendering like Leo thought he was. We start attacking him head-on, but we get blown away from his force wind and I bump into Donnie but he's able to catch me. April lands on the ground and continues to attack the gargoyles until they pass out and while she has one in her mouth like a chew toy, she gives a thumbs up which we all return. Draxum shoots a caccon spray and April is wrapped tightly in it. Mikey tosses his whip at Draxum it ignites and an evil laugh emanates from it and poor Mikey is soon pulled and thrown around the lair. He hits the top of the mosquito infuser machine and it starts to spark and electricity swirls around it.

We all look at Mikey once he lands next to us with our eyes Sparkling with fascination. It started a chain reaction while Raph and Leo tried to activate their weapons too but failling miserably. I kind of feel bad for Leo as he opened two portals and continues to fall. I activate mine and slice him which turns into two pink crescents that form an X and cuts him but it seems to do no damage. So Donnie takes over and attacks with his Bo (he def ate this scene 😍) he hits Draxum with an Iron punch and when he goes to attack again Mikey collides with him and they go flying.

"You fight like untrained baffons" Draxum says

I take offense to that and scoff, then we all get encapsulated in the cocoon spray, and Donnie and Mikey are stuck together. Donnie tries to figure out how we are going to rescue the dog thingy and he sees that the mosquito goo infuser is getting ready to blow and we all try to squirm and free ourselves. A huge chunk of rock falls onto Draxum and the goo mosquitos escape and a piece of the infuser falls onto the dog things cage and it escapes. It teleports to us and thankfully teleports it out of the exploding lair. Mikey opens up the portal and we jump through, as we fall through their father doo icky breaks apart. April names the dog thingy Mayhem and almost goo mosquitos escape into the New Yori city sunrise. We quickly rush out of there before people can spot us. We jump onto a rooftop, I wave to the group and take off towards the apartment. Donnie watches me as I gracefully jump from building to building. He activates his hovering wings and follows his family back home.

"Well, that was an exciting night!" I say while climbing through my bedroom window, falling onto my bed, plugging in my phone to charge, and as soon as my head hits the pillow I fall into blissful sleep.

#rottmnt donatello #rottmnt x reader #rise donatello #rottmnt #rise donnie #rise of the tmnt #rottmnt fanfiction #rise raph #rise leo #rise mikey #rise april

[warsofasoiaf]

Ryan Condal confirmed that F&B is Green propaganda and he created the show with GRRM. It’s safe to assume Rhaenyra wasn’t nearly as a terrible ruler as she is depicted by the sources and has been slandered. You completely misinterpreted her character.

Ah, I suppose those smallfolk just killed themselves and put their heads on spikes above the Red Keep. I suppose the death warrants for Addam Velaryon and Nettles wrote and delivered themselves. I suppose the proclamation that anyone who doubted Jace's, Luke's and Joff's parentage would get their tongue removed was all fake.

-SLAL

#troll

[gvinfrees]

What to say. I made a post two days ago about going on a hiatus and maybe coming back when things “calmed down”. To be clear that was before Kdin bravely posted her account of the trauma she endured at RT.

It’s clear to me now that things won’t calm down this time, nor should they.

This blog is eight years old. And theres a lot of good memories here for me. AH/RT really was the main reason I survived middle and high school. Every day I came home and through the loneliness I felt I could turn on the new video for the day and knew I had something I could enjoy.

Thus this blog was born where I had other people who I knew felt the same way and where I could channel these feelings. It was an escape and I can’t not be grateful. How it got over 4000 followers through that, who knows. But every time someone followed it made me happy because it was another person who loved the same people/content I did.

But finally, I am done. And it is so hard. This is the most dramatic thing I have ever written but cutting off rt/ah is almost like cutting off a limb for me. And believe me I wish I was joking. But that is how vital their existence has been for me the last ten years.

As embarrassing as it is, the ryan situation still stings almost two years later, and i know this is going to hurt even worse.

But there is no excuse for the treatment of not just Kdin but so many people who have come forward. All of those people who put so much work into the content we all enjoyed, and that the company enjoyed making money off of. Those people who showed up during the earliest hours of Extra Life that we would sometimes see for the first time, still smiling though they were getting treated like trash behind the scenes and we didn’t even know.

It all feels fake and plastic now. I always looked up to “the founding fathers” for what they managed to create. But now I know so much of it was a farce.

I want to believe the AH members at whole have grown up and have changed for the better. But one thing I have learned the last few years is we will never know who these people are behind closed doors. And even then, no matter who they are today, Kdin and probably others have to deal with the trauma they imparted on them forever. And that is something that just can’t be undone.

This blog will stay up but I won’t be rebranding it or anything. All it has ever been is this. This username. This content. So I am just going to let it be.

All good things come to and end, I just wish this one was as good as I thought it was.

#Achievement Hunter #Rooster Teeth

[disniq]

Season 1, episode 1: Titans

(Here we go, baybee)

Everything in this show is so damn dark, please just let me see

Right off the bat with the creepy circus music, love that. And we are once again leveraging Dick Grayson’s extremely personal tragedy onto other people, yay!

(Side note, but I was trying to work out how old Rachel is supposed to be so I looked up Teagan Croft’s age-- SHE’S 14/15 HERE. RYAN POTTER IS 9 YEARS OLDER THAN HER. I had just been assuming Rachel, Gar and Jason were all about the same age, what the fuck. I have so many questions about the ages of these characters!!)

Look, I'm not a huge fan of Rachel in general, but knowing she's only 15~ does earn her a smidge more sympathy from me. Everything is harder when you're 15 and a bunch of cultists are trying to kill you.

Brenton Thwaites is very pretty. And very serious. (This show has it's issues, but the casting is not one of them imo)

"He's from Gotham, likes to work alone." (See? We know the source material!)

(Does anybody know why they changed it to Detroit? Were they contractually not allowed to use Bludhaven, or did they think using a real place made it more relatable?)

11 minutes in and we have our first body. (Did you know this is an Adult show, for Adults. Look how dark and gritty we are.) RIP Rachel’s fake mom.

Back to Robin, and;

Sir. That's a grown ass man in a cape.

Also, @bloodyentrails made a good point here - why are drug dealers in Detroit, Michigan scared of Batman and Robin anyway?

Oh man, I know the shows whole Thing is that it’s dark and gritty but fuck me. Dick stabs two guys in the neck in his first fight and straight up snaps at least four bones.

(Just setting the tone here for when they still try to pull the “Jason is reckless and violent” card later.)

(I am keeping a body count for everybody, btw.)

(Dick is on 2, but honestly the guys that lived are gonna be pretty fucked up for a good while.)

Anna Diop is also very pretty. I am but a simple bisexual.

Oh, Kori totally banged that hotel concierge. Good for her dot gif.

Her face journey through this whole scene is peak comedy. "I loved you" "Sorry, who are you again?"

Funny how the whole room and three men were charred crispy, but that single photo of Rachel was miraculously intact. Ah, cinema.

(Kori is up to 4 kills. Slay girl! Incinerate!!)

Back to Rachel, who is getting kidnapped! Yay! How do all these different groups of cultists suddenly know where she is?? A few days ago she was just attending school no problemo, but now they can track her across states?

At any rate, it doesn't end well for this guy in particular.

And last but not least, a big kitty stealing games!

They really said Here are your main four heroes, they're all criminals :D

#titans (2018) #hbo titans #titans rewatch

[zalrb]

the summer i turned pretty 2x02 review

"Put this on" and she doesn't put it on. So then what's the point. FOR THE CHIVALRY, ZAL. THE CHIVALRY.

Oh, is this the episode they have sex?

Why would Belly know where Conrad's dorm is though?

Jeremiah didn't take the coffee you offered him but why does that mean you have to throw out your coffee too?

Ah, one Black/dark-skinned guy.

He is literally the best actor on the show so far and he's only here to be Conrad's roommate.

Exposition time: "He fell into a depression and was looking at your picture!" like who says that? If anything it would've been like, Ohhhhh you're Belly and that's it. Belly would be like "What's that supposed to mean?" and then you can be like "Nothing, nothing, just you know, it really fucked Conrad up when you two broke up." Like just make the dialogue a LITTLE natural??

THE INFINITY NECKLACE. Honestly, who cares.

"I know even though he won't say it" we don't NEED a voiceover here, oh my god, Scorsese can't be the only one who uses voiceovers properly.

How is it possible to care even less about Belly's brother and her mother when I care so little about Belly and this ridiculous triangle.

I skipped through this conversation because it's painful af.

I always find it rude when people turn on music in other people's cars lmao.

"Cause I'm always here if you ever need to talk." *suddenly starts talking* if it was that easy then why do this whole thing anyway.

At least Taylor is good at keeping up with Belly's lies but Belly why wouldn't you text Taylor the lie you said to your mom? Amateur shit man.

If you guys know each other so well wouldn't he know that you could do something like change a tire? And I'm not saying he has to know everything about her but they don't seem to know anything about each other.

The details on this show are horrendous.

Also a spare can only take you so far, you would still need to go to a mechanic to change the tire.

Belly, you were my best friend! WAS SHE?

This is the flattest argument. They're not even talking over each other, everything is SO contained.

If you hate yourself for forgetting him then I need more emotion. And he is STRUGGLING for a tear.

And she manages a tear when he's like you weren't there, you left me but her face is so flat, that's why I keep saying crying is about more than tears, like both of you should be DEVASTATED. At the VERY LEAST I should be getting Bellarke from these or from her and Conrad (ha, which I also said when watching Shadow and Bone)

I know it's supposed to have been like a while since the two of them have spoken but it doesn't feel that way so their resolution happens SO quickly i'm like why even there be a "chasm" in the first place.

How are Bella and Jacob better than this?

Wait, how did they get their tire fixed?

Everyone is so bad at trying to act natural around each other.

"You always could read my mind" I MEAN COULD HE?

Just because you guys say it doesn't mean we SEE it.

Belly! omg Nicole! Everything sounds SO fake.

Why wouldn't you grab something from like a gas station on the way? You're just going to hope for Oreos? Also Conrad you had to drive four hours from Brown to wherever she lives you didn't pick up supplies on the way?

*gasp* hot cocoa! "amazing!" i mean,, is it?

again conrad/belly are supposed to be matt and julie on the couch

or they're supposed to be ryan and marissa by the pool

or jake and peyton just being themselves

and there's just such a coldness to them. and i know he's doing that whole focus on her because he's suddenly serious and intense and it's NOT PLATONIC but it doesn't work when you don't have chemistry and are only capable of one facial expression.

of course a taylor swift song is playing.

they're trying SO HARD to be happy, like jeyton has great chemistry but i remember that one scene when they're in savannah and hilarie just overacts

and that's what it is watching belly all the time while conrad is just standing around being jughead or jon looking at daenerys, i just i can't. i caaaaaaaan't.

and i've just seen too many play fights

and the love scene, the lighting is doing the work and so is desiree because that's the song they use in leo dicaprio's romeo + juliet and also it's a clear call back pjo's love scene

but as much as i have issues with pjo's narrative so much about this is earned because there are callbacks, like i know i don't know the whole context of this show and of this ship but it seems like the only thing is the necklace whereas joey calls back to the time when pacey is like i'm going to count to ten and then i'm going to start kissing you etc. and brings it up IN dialogue then she whispers before the kiss, "my love" and belly's just here being like "no i know, no i want to" your voice should be different, it shouldn't just be like a regular conversation, like neither of you have conviction in your voices

"what is she doing here?" are you torn are you mad or are you just saying the line, sir?

oh good, it's over.

[sibillascribbles08]

ok last one i promise KDKFKG

107

You say this like I am bothered I can assure you I am not alskjdf

Donatello hated that he was going to his dad for advice.

Mainly because he'd already tried that before asking Jase out, before even being friends with him in fact. Befriending Jase just slowly lead him to the realization that he had no parental figures in his life that had any good advice regarding romantic relationships.

After all, just look at the line up. His dad, who's only stable relationship resulted in him being imprisoned in an arena for years. Draxum, who's relationship history was not only a mystery but also one Donatello didn't care to dig up. Holly Blue, who flat out told him when he asked her about dating to just never bother with it--not encouraging. And who else? Todd? Donatello wasn't about to open that can of worms either.

At least this was far less about general relationship advice and more specific like what the heck kind of things did you do with someone for a date?

Donatello didn't want to get his information from films, far too fictional to trust, and running internet searches was not only embarrassing but came with mixed results. Especially for New York City. A three hundred dollar dinner? No thank you.

So, here he was, standing in the living room while his dad watched some kind of romance drama on the big screen.

"Hey, Dad?" Donatello cleared his throat.

Splinter glanced over at him. "Yes, Purple? Did you need something?"

"Uh, just, wanted to ask for your opinion on something." He tried not to clear his throat again, tried not to fidget as he kept glancing to the side. "Like um... date ideas."

Splinter's ears shot straight up before he rolled over in his chair to lean over the arm rest. "Ohohoho, with that purple dragon boy?"

Donatello grit his teeth, trying to shove back the heat emerging in his cheeks. "He's not a purple dragon anymore, but yes."

Splinter hummed, tail swishing from side to side, obviously amused. "Surprised you're asking me for advice."

"I'm desperate." He scoffed.

"Hmph, rude! But well... date ideas would entirely depend on what the two of you like to do."

Donatello pressed his lips together. "Uh... programming?"

"No! Non-working activities. Going to the zoo? The park? A demolition derby?"

The last one was a joke, but Donatello glared at it.

"How about a movie?" Splinter pointed to the screen with his tail. "I know you love those."

That was actually a good idea. Jase had already shown him a few back when they were just friends, and apparently there were many, many movies that Donatello could still catch up on.

"Hm, I see you have your idea." Splinter flopped back onto the sofa. "Hope he has space at his place, or you get your own TV. You are not stealing mine so you can make-out on the sofa."

Donatello flinched, all the heat rushing back to his face. "Dad!"

His father just laughed.

----------------

Jase sighed, staring at the wall of math homework still on the screen. He technically didn't have to do it all tonight--the professor just posted all the weekly homework at once--but he wanted it out of the way so it didn't cut into his weekend free time.

Still, maybe he should take a break. Online math homework was a nightmare.

As if on cue, his phone buzzed on his desk. Jase picked it up, looking at Donnie's icon before answering it.

"Why, if it isn't Othello Von Ryan." He taunted into the line as he tabbed away from the math page.

"I can't believe you're still calling me that." Donnie tsked.

"You come up with a dumb fake name I'm never letting it go." He mindlessly scrolled through his social feed, looking to see if there were any updates on the leaks for the next line of transformers. "Any particular reason you called? You usually like to text."

"Ah, well... I just thought it would be easier to ask over the phone?"

"Lie." Jase said flatly. "You're really bad at that, you know."

"Only sometimes." Donnie snapped. "Fine. It's been a few days so I wanted to hear your voice."

Ah. Jase adjusted his glasses before messing with his hair to ease up the burning in his ears. "You said you wanted to ask me something?"

"Yes." Donnie's typical, confident tone returned. "You, me, popcorn, two liter Dr. Pepper and a movie. You in?"

A movie? "What movie?"

"I am so glad you asked. I have narrowed down my list of two hundred possible films to just five by calculating the length, ratings, content, actors, the actor ratings, the--"

Jase couldn't stop himself from snorting and laughing.

"Huh?" Donnie said. "What? What's so funny?"

"Sorry." Jase said between laughs. "Sorry, not laughing at you. It's just... so you."

"What's so me?"

"Going through all that analysis just to pick a movie." He let out another chuckle before running a hand through his hair. "But yeah, sure, send me the list and I'll help pick one out."

"So... that's a yes?"

"Yeah, Donnie, we've watched movies before."

"Sure, but not as a date."

He forced himself not to laugh again, both out of amusement and nerves. He found it so endearing that Donnie, who almost always had this guise of confidence and boldness would always get so shy about conversations like this.

Not that Jase was any better.

"Does it have to be Dr. Pepper by the way?" He tried to change the subject a little.

"Dr. Pepper is the superior movie soda."

"Yeah? Did you calculate that too?"

"Well, statistically--"

"Oh my god." He groaned, even though he kept smiling. "No. How about I just bring my own soda."

"It better not be that weird knock off grape soda."

"The taste of purple."

"Ugh!"

"Going to chug half the bottle right in front of you."

"Disgusting. Horrible. Maybe I should un-invite you."

"Yeah?" Jase rested his arm on the desk before leaning forward to put his cheek on it, still holding the phone to his ear. "Then who are you going to watch the movie with?"

"Hm, you have a good point. I suppose your company will just have to do."

"Yeah, whatever Donnie." Jase couldn't seem to stop smiling. "I look forward to it."

"Right." Donnie sounded nervous again. "I um... do too."

Jase glanced at his computer screen, the math tab haunting him. He sat up again, minimizing the entire window before pushing away from his desk. "Are you busy right now?"

"Not entirely, though Mikey will probably call me for dinner soon enough."

"That's okay." Jase flopped onto his bed. "Just want to talk for a bit longer. What were you doing at work today?"

"Oh! Well Alori, the cheetah yokai, she came by to test the new hanging lights and..."

#scribbly fics #rottmnt #jasonnie #okay I had so much fun with the dialogue in this one #Splinter as soon as he finds out Donnie has a bf: Oh I am going to tease him about this forever

[bluepuppethidinginafilingcabinet]

here we go y’all

this weeks silly little (probably actually quite long) puppet history notes/commentary

this weeks woosh caption: “an echo of a dinosaur roar from the cretaceous period” spooky

hi maya

oh we’re putting ryan in shackles now huh

classic mario kart story tbh

professor getting flashbacks over here

i’m very excited about this topic

i fucking love paper. imagine inventing paper. that’s so cool.

paper is an s tier invention. i’m right.

vietnam seems chill.

wow the professor really said okay leave then

i really want it to be a frog plague

it’s not a frog plague :(

it’s a new dynasty. because history.

evil echoing laugh is back

i thought it was before common era……..

yo this man out here excecuting his sons and grandkid

“would y’all ever kill your own-“ PROFESSOR NO

i love when a wholeass river changes course. multiple times.

the professor snores huh

uhhhh you’re in the theatre fake professor

oh boy a tax increase

ummmm there’s a lot of glitching

the box is suspicious as always

i swear if they put taxes on tea that’d be funny

did i misunderstand the question or did they? who knows

salt and fish were apparently the answers

the horse wife is back. even though she should be dead. and in puppet purgatory.

this is a fun little ad

the professor just standing there like 🧍

i wanna build a watcher kingdom. shame i have no money.

i’ve decided to stan these two sisters. this may not end well for me considering history.

that’s a very you joke to make ryan

ryan wants to be a product of the immaculate conception via shaq apparently

these two are slaying

oh damn that’s a tiger. damn.

it has 3 eyes

an 18 did nothing???? huh

she really just attacked with kale. and lost a hand.

(items falling in background)

oop bye bye head. that’s unfortunate

THEY HUNG HIS BODY FROM THE GATES?????

or maybe they didn’t. welp. who knows.

boooo patriarchy

we’re assuming he’s dead. got it.

i love a war pyramid scheme

if you wouldn’t do war with your friends what’s the point? like are you really friends?

also this lady slays. i love her.

what is the professor on?

claiming immortality apparently

four things she promised. huh. okay my guesses. revenge. salt. gold. and cotton candy. because why not.

damn i want a country wide lazy river

edit: THE PROFESSOR KEEPS IGNORING THE LAZY RIVER MENTIONS

okay if the make out sessions start now. how do you fight the war??

slay okay. revenge. restoring lineage. avenge death of husband. attain goals. uhhh okay. sure.

well if it works it works i suppose

little devil horns on ryan is fun

15 JELLY BEANS EACH???????

ah yeah a swing of the hips wins the troops over. sure ryan.

trung be slaying

IM SORRY THIS LADY OUT HERE GIVING BIRTH AND CONTINUING THE FIGHT?????

ah yes an army of women swinging babies around

women can in fact kill too. so true professor.

no taxes? that’s… a choice…

i too am waiting for the other shoe to drop

boooo i don’t like this

yeahhhhh well that’s unfortunate

they still slayed

oh the bigger entity takes out the smaller huh ryan?

okay so the options are, they die, they die, or they die

oh we don’t know. okay. well. i’m starting to think that we don’t actually know when people die.

kinda baller that they never surrendered

imagine being dragged up to heaven by your ankles. that’d be an experience.

history is in fact petty

the women really be getting things done in this story. as they should.

damn that’s a speech right there

this is such as slay

the tiger is back. very pretty puppet. fluffy.

ryan does have a point when he called it a johnny cash tiger

“and now i’m fucking dead” that’s so awkward for you tiger

he’s very upset about this huh

professor be ignoring the algorithm again

professor you can’t just call people supple

egg professor has eyebrows

this is so odd

so shane. what. is. going. on.

#watcher #watcher entertainment #we are watcher #all hail the watcher #ryan bergara #shane madej #puppet history #puppet history season 5 #the professor