#famous gerard is your idealized fantasy self | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

atnaturesmercy · 4 years

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i know your playlists have little descriptions on them but can you go further in depth into them? i think they're all super good and have cool music on them but i wanna know MORE

IM GONNA PUT THIS UNDER THE CUT LOL IF IM BEING GIVEN THE CHANCE TO FINALLY DISCUSS I WILL BE AS VERBOSE AS I CAN BE:

i believe huntGather is self explanatory, so i will move on.

URSOCOOL: need to flesh it out! its a new one. between hating friends for thinking they’re cool and hating myself for thinking i’m cool and loving the Us vs Them rockstar mentality

NJ or bust: im very redundant and very defensive and very idk exhausted of going into so much detail but im saving up tips so i can be a person again and feel like the world isn’t about to get me because the forests are larger, swallow you whole, the towns have people in them, there’s this intersection of life and decay that pulls me in and i miss all of ... hm. i miss home. i’m sick here.

i mean if u want: lesbian barista x waitress really niche concept that combines my love of airports with my love of women and my love of unconventional domesticity. i idealize the jetsetter lifestyle and, well, finding out your love affair has killed someone in cold blood.... it’s like. well okay the notion is hot i guess but it originated from a revelation i had of “what if i made dasher (the song i cried to at the airport because listening to gerard way in his natural habitat was far too great of a psychic energy surge) something that rocks instead of a droopy christmas song” and voila. i recently discovered this concept of like.... “pining???” i guess? which to me is foreign because i am a former serial dater (rip thirst followers i will never have sex) so i was like i need to get out all of my horny energy let me put Linger by the cranberries and murder songs on the same playlist. this is how i approach romance because i hate it hvjbk

bloodletting: i went to the ER but the day before i wrote a poem while conveniently bleeding out and it’s very much like a... fantasy of mine to be interviewed and open with this “song” (which is not a song, it is a poem, but i want to write songs eventually) and idk. like a repressed musician’s inspiration playlist of one song, put it on Genius Lyrics when I’m famous.

liquid diet: I’m beyond livid by what the clinic did to me and as an act of rebellion I did, in fact, have so much fun relapsing that I went to the ER 2 weeks out of IOP. they put me on a liquid diet and the nurses cooed over my frail spine (which u can, conveniently, see, because that is my x-ray). but my parents thought i looked better, once i kept losing. mmm. then my friend died. she went to the hospital with me. so it’s a lot of grief and a lot of fuck you i will destroy myself because my friend’s blood is on your hands. my own blood is on your hands. i had nightmares for a year because of shit you did that i can’t speak about. i guess it’s easy to fall through the cracks.

mothership: this is very conspicuously a... very traumatic. playlist aha but i needed to put all of the songs i’ve grieved to in (1) spot bc ive learned if i make something pretty i dont want to eat it/ruin it/touch it

rawr: THIS ONE I NEEEEEEED TO UPDATE! IT MAKES ME SO ANGRY I HAVENT! i did not get into secular music until my sophomore year of high school and so i missed out on the 00s to 10s wave of pop/pop punk music. i want to feel like i actually went to middle school instead of being homeschooled :(

our lady: rpg oc... is there like a specific term for this? that i really need to reorganize. u can tell that all of my placeholder 1s are at the bottom 4 a reason.

#i guess tonight im redoing my spotify AND tumblr tags #*groans* this is the push to externalizing my genius mind #asks #faq

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