HI it's Salt Anon now off anon. I meant to make at most like 8 hcs for Soldier!Reader but I ended up doing waay more than that so I hope you don't mind how long this is 😖👉👈:
S!Reader is generally nonchalant about everything, but I think they would actually be pissed if anything happened to their favorite (children) grunts. Someone better help Phobos when he’s faced with a “God” who’s far stronger (and taller) than he is cause they will show no mercy.
Arguments between the more passive grunt cult members and the fanatics over whose “god(s)” are better. The other ones would probably just kill anyone who questions Reader’s “divine authority”. Crackpot will have to deal with some of them converting 💀
Who needs buoyancy or Zeds when you have a tall hot god who also gives you headpats?
Reader’s filled with knowledge on so many weapons. Grunts ask them stuff and then listen to them prattle on for hours about whatever with big ol’ heart eyes. The fact that Reader knows so much is proof to them that they must be a de facto authority on war. Why else would they be able to talk for so long on why the mag shape of this gun is slightly better than that one?
They keep records of everything S!Reader shows even the slightest interest in. Expect a big pile of the stuff to appear the next day. They’re lowkey making the throne into a shrine with how they stack things up against it. Some give hand made “offerings” to S!Reader and Reader excessively fawns over them (even if it’s like the equivalent of a child’s macaroni portrait).
Reader goes :O “my heart, aughg” when the grunts purr, will praise them deliberately or touch them just to hear it.
“Aw, you managed to get my favorite, thanks lil dude! :) *cue headpat*” Grunt: *sound of small motor boat*
S!Reader will accept any presents from their weird gray beans, but the others see themselves as “quality control” and will fight over if it's up to standard. The gifts keep getting more and more morbid too. First it was a cool book, now it’s another grunt’s heart in a jar (the one who insulted them last week). Reader thinks it’s a cool paperweight tho.
S!Reader ain’t got a bed yet, but will still use a lucky grunt as a teddy bear if they ask nicely. Because honestly, they’re just too cute (and warm) to deny. Tho Hank prolly threatens people into letting him do it most of the time. He also growls when anyone gets too close to them.
The former fanatics make art and stuff of S!Reader and start putting it up everywhere. Real propaganda level shit. Auditor see’s it through the cameras and is like “Wtf is that thing?”
If S!Reader gives anything to the grunts it immediately becomes their most prized possession. They probably take the spent shells from Reader’s gun and put it on necklaces or smth. They are “holy artifacts” after all.
CONSTANT FIGHTS OVER WHO THEIR FAVORITE IS
Arguments over which nickname belongs to who.
“I’m their lil guy tho” “bitch they called me that yesterday stop lyin”
Hank’s v smug because he’s the only one they call “mini me”
Head pats galore. Just a lot of physical affection. Some ask for pointers on aiming or smth just to feel Reader’s hands on them.
I HAVE MORE STILL BUT THIS POST IS SO LONG IM SORRY
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