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#fear of being alone
lovesick02 · 8 months
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Please don´t fall in love with somebody else
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sl8tersstuff · 14 days
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I love life but I’m never going to find a way to live it without an abiding fear that I’m going to be alone forever.
As they say, there’s no guarantee you’ll be loved.
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rayehehe · 24 days
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I hate how this is me
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xashtray · 2 years
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I'm scared to have friends, to have romantic partners, to just have someone beside me. I'm scared that they will only leave and abandon me, only leave bruises, scars, and pain. I'm scared that I'll get too close, get too attached to them, being dependent on them, and come off as clingy or weird or whatever. I'm scared that if I open up they will use my flaws against me. I'm scared that they will hate me for being myself, hate me for anything i do and hate me for no reasons. I'm scared to find myself being alone and lonely if they're not here with me, because I'm supposed to be okay with my loneliness. I'm scared, too scared to let someone in. too scared just to even type out a text, give a call, or even start a convo, to reach out for someone. to ask someone to be my friend, to be here for me, to be here with me, to listen to me, to have fun with me, anything they could do with and for me. because I have assumed they will leave as soon as they walk into my life.
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venting-with-jitty · 9 months
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I have monophobia, scared of being alone & abandonment, & all my friends know that. So one day they all ignore me FUCKING GREAT?? Now this was a few weeks ago but i just thought ab it. I hate ppl who like to trigger ppls fears I'VE TOLD THEM THIS MILLIONS OF TIMES 2! So why fucking do it? It scared me so fucking bad & made me feel not real. Yes, ik i sound childish but imagine u have a fear & everyone triggers it. IMAGINE!
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coolbonnieart · 4 months
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Tw blood:
I apologize for not posting in abit...I would like to address why:
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My mental heath has be deteriorating as of late and I've been feeling less and less happy,
I've been trying to hide if from people but it doesn't seem to be working... the more i want to connect....the more I feel distended..cold, and I dont want to feel like that.
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And it usually shows in threw my art ( most with the abstract pizza tower au or eclipse goemon)
My aus arnt just for fun, they're usually how I feel or what's going on in my mind.
I hope you understand, and again I apologize for not posting sooner.
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bilbopaggins · 2 years
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wanderingmind867 · 8 months
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You know something I'm scared of? (I know I'm scared of a lot, but follow me here). I'm scared of being alone one day. Because I worry it'll happen. I try to put it out of mind (and I usually do), but I still worry about it every now and then.
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howifeltabouthim · 2 months
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It's all such a charade, she thought, this pretending to be in love just to avoid being alone. I want to love him, but you can't force yourself to fall in love with someone, let alone marry them, just because they want you to.
Anna Biller, from Bluebeard's Castle
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Boredom is a fear of being alone with yourself.
from Feline Philosophy by John Gray 
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haemosexuality · 1 year
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thinking in depth ab the fears after finishing the podcast has just been an endless loop of "ooooh its not literal"
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lovesick02 · 2 years
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whimsicalpoet44 · 2 years
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Maybe this is my punishment. Maybe this is Hell. Maybe they sentenced me to a life of understanding everyone but myself. I was left to die without ever grasping the feeling of what it is to be seen and understood.
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xashtray · 2 years
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i want to beg people to never leave me, beg them to stay here with me no matter how fucked up i am. i want to show them my jealousy, my obsession, i want to scream and just go crazy when they don't give me enough attention. i want them to know that i need them so much. i need them to be here with me, for me. to love me, want me, to obsessed with me, to care about me, need me too. everything that makes me feel seen, wanted, loved, cared about, so i can feel good about myself. i want them to validate myself. it doesn't matter if they might only hurt me, if they just wanna use me, they just see me as a crazy stupid bitch. i don't care. i will do anything, i will be down on my knees, i will cry and beg, i will do any fucking thing just to make them stay, just to make them love me, just to make them see me.
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tosin-talks · 1 year
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Tosin Talks about the lover's loneliness
Just a fair warning that I’m being really vulnerable in this blog post. Talking about childhood trauma and struggling with BPD…not a big deal, I’ll talk about those things to help others any day. However, talking about having feelings and wanting to be truly loved and cherished? I feel disgusting and ashamed just thinking about it. Please read/listen with kindness and acceptance in your heart. 
“I love my solitude but I was meant to be a lover.” I’m a certified lover girl at my core. My softness is my strength, it’s what enabled me to rise above adversity. I’m blessed to have friends that taught me what true love is. I believe that being loved by me is a blessing as well. No other feeling satiates me as much as love does. The most remarkable feeling is when I’m full of love and the most devastating feeling is when someone hurts me and I have to work tremendously hard to replenish myself of love. I end my letters to loved ones with the sweetest sign off. When I was just a little younger, I would hand out an “I love you” to almost every soul I encountered and despite the harm that I faced from doing that, I wish I had the strength to be that girl again.  
Admittedly, I often have a “difficult” time being alone and recently, I’ve felt like I’m truly alone in this world. It’s a physical, emotional, and spiritual sensation that often feels like an aching, a longing, a yearning for connection. It’s not that I can’t be alone—I moved to two different cities during my adult life alone, I live alone, I make big decisions alone, I handle my business alone. I was raised not to depend on anyone and to achieve my goals on my own if others were not putting in the effort to join me. Even if I’m responsible for others and required to be a caregiver to other people, there is still loneliness in that role. I definitely know how to be alone. I always felt alone in the way I think, the way I behave, the way I love and want love. I often felt like I didn’t fit in, even within my own culture and family. If you’ve read my Tosin Talk about covid killing my friendships, you know that I’ve learned how to survive without connections but I don’t want to live in survival mode anymore.
As I mentioned earlier, the loneliness is felt on three different levels. On a physical level, I feel almost a desperation to be held but refusal to have the wrong person do so. I sleep solely on one side of my bed, hoping and waiting for someone worthy to fill the empty space on the other side. I wish to turn in my bed and into the arms of someone who cares for me deeply. With emotional loneliness, I’m not only yearning for true love but for someone to be able to handle my emotions with care. I can only hold in so much, I can only say and do so much to soothe myself. Sometimes, I wish that there was someone there to sit with me through some of those feelings. I’m used to crying to myself and I hate crying in front of people so the emotional loneliness is grand. Spiritual loneliness is a truly hollow feeling. I feel deeply disconnected to many people, many interactions make me feel like I’m lost and floating through space. I’m searching for the souls that are destined to bond with mine. I think I’ve found a few and I can feel others searching for me too but it may not be time for some of those connections to exist or be promoted to another level. 
Recently, I’ve had to teach myself to be alone. I take intentional breaks from everyone and force myself to let loneliness surround me and hold me the same way that I would want another person to. It’s not the worst thing I’ve ever felt, it’s definitely strange and uncomfortable though. I recently ended a relationship in which I felt lonely and was actually alone even though we were together. I would rather be genuinely alone than experience that again; that’s what parts of my childhood felt like and I won’t consciously put myself through that again. That being said, I’m learning to find comfort in my solitude and keep in mind that I am deserving of the incredible love and deep connection that I desire.
I know I won’t be forever alone (at least, I really hope that I won’t). I’m learning to be patient. I am trying to trust in the universe that, when the time is right, it’ll give me the intimacy and tenderness that I’ve been searching for all my life.
With an abundance of love,
Tosin
Background music - Backingtracks Jazz chord progression of "Solitude" by Billie Holiday
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grammymumzy · 1 year
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