#feeling unmotivated again

[figofswords]

the post grad why did i get an art degree what am i even doing what do i want in life where am i going crisis has finally hit i want to. lie down in the dirt. or something

#WHAT AM I DOING!!!! #i get up i go to my stupid retail job i stick labels on bags they pay me fucking thirteen bucks an hour i come home i lie on the couch #too tired to draw in too much pain to go anywhere no energy to reach out to college friends to do anything fun #no idea where the even start with getting an industry job no clue what i even WANT at this point #trying to remember what i loved so much about comics i want it BACK i HATE this #WHAT IS THE POINT!!!! WHAT DO I WANT WHERE AM I GOING!!! WHAT COMES NEXT!!!!!! #there's no clear career trajectory i can't do freelance i need structure i can't work too much i need free time #my brain doesn't work every job requires me to move across the country the irs just took fucking three hundred stupid dollars from me #my friends live in different states i can't get a job without experience i can't get experience without a job #i can't work on my portfolio with no energy and no time and i dont have any money and everything is so expensive all the time #i can't get anywhere bc i dont drive and im too stressed to think about taking driving lessons again #and WHAT DO I WANT! #THE MOST INTERESTING THING I DO EVERY WEEK IS GO TO PHYSICAL THERAPY! #I AM EXCITED EVERY WEEK FOR PHYSICAL THERAPY!!!! WHY!!!!!!!! #anyway WHATEVER i need to go to bed #delete later #i got into spx. today. so. had to have a crisis about how i felt when i attended spx (energized. excited. a part of something. ambitious) #versus how i feel now (tired. unmotivated. kind of apathetic about art. disconnected) #i dont miss the stress of school but i miss being around other artists. ppl who speak your language and who want the same things you want #ppl who are excited abut art and that makes YOU excited about art. ppl who get you #i miss that i want that back #whatever. its 1am i gotta go shower i have an 8.5 hour shift tomorrow. wahoo. $13.50/hr lets go

[hazelnutnebula]

a gaze as blinding as starlight ✧ ✦ ⋆

#My Characters #Atlas #sketches #scribbles #doodles #ive been bl oody exhausted and so unmotivated most of this week ooguhg #but i feel insane again. so its fine and i can be epic again (???) #fghjkLKJHGsdfhgjvbk #also sorry for so many like. bust / headshot pieces. i promise i;ll do some more interesting stuff soon gHjskdfjhgfC

[linkbetweenlinksau]

Ok ok…. Idk… if for sure that Spirit will be in lbl, rn the story is kinda falling apart but regardless I really wanted to do a design for him and and his Zelda Phantom cuz I love them so much 😭

I imagine that Phantom actually grew to like fighting and the phantom armor so she started taking fighting classes with the soldier guy and spars with Spirit! And she got a custom made armor that resembles the old phantom armor, just more lightweight and less uncomfortable for her lol. I imagine that she doesn’t want to sit around helplessly if there is danger again, so she wants to be able to protect herself but most importantly, she wants to protect Spirit. She’s still a super girly princess tho cuz I love that about her <3333

And then with Spirit, I feel like he’d still be an engineer, but he’s been promoted! I also imagine him as mute so he used that notepad to communicate with people. Idk why but Spirit specifically gave me silent vibes (I know the links are silent technically but they all speak in lbl but I don’t imagine it’s the same for Spirit)

They’re just two awkward 13 year olds and I adore them

#again idk if I’ll add them #I’m going through a writing predicament rn with lbl #i think it’s too ambitious for me and I might have to tone it down a lot #but I might go into it in another post #or I might forget but I feel like I have some explaining to do #luckily I know the end point #so I’m not unmotivated #i just need to deal with the middle #anyways #lbl spirit #lbl phantom #legend of zelda #legend of zelda au #zelda au #link between links #these two and skord have the best Zelda and link relationship and you cannot change my mind #i adore skord so I don’t think anything will beat that but these two are just SO CUTE

[maideninorange]

Sorry for vanishing guys. I'm still alive, just... taking a break from social media. My mental health has not been kind to me these past few months, and I found that I... Just haven't been able to reblog and do things like I used to on here. Not to mention college. College has been eating up a lot of my time.

I don't know why things are like this for me, but like this they are. I keep telling myself I'll come back one of these days, but so far nothing has stuck.

So yeah. TL;DR: I'm still alive, just gone dormant. I hope to be back one day for real though. When? I do not know. But someday.

#she speaks #life update #even just writing this up #and tagging it #is taking up energy #I feel so damn unmotivated writing wise #stresses of life getting to me I suppose #and just poking around my dash on here #just makes me feel worse #so I haven't been on here #I'm okay though #just...going through the motions I suppose #nobody's fault #I want to write again... #...But I suppose I need rest first #don't I?

[mu1tiverse]

adding:

sofia m.antega / wind d.ancer - m.arvel comics (h.umberly gonzález)

#a friend introduced me to new m.utants 03 and ..... that is my daughter she is my baby she is my angel #there's hardly anything for her in the tags or just Anywhere really and i think that's a GOD DAMN SHAME #i am SPEEDING through her lil wiki list of appearances right now .. i know Hardly Anything about x.men stuff but .. i'm learning #i've been yelling as i'm reading and i just.. i think she's Neat she's been bouncing around inside my head for like a week #also i'm probs just gonna yeet everyone on the same blog again bc i'm feeling some kinda way abt tumblr rn (unmotivated) #anyway hi hello ily i am hugging you through my screen

[running-in-the-dark]

annnnd I slept all day again.... 😬

that's 12 hours. I was awake for 3 before that. and slept for 8 hours before that.

yeah I don't know I think I'm giving up.

#it's. so frustrating. #I only went to bed this morning to lie down for an hour. bc I was feeling so unmotivated and everything #asked my husband to wake me before he left. he did. but it took me 6 hours to finally get up #then had to lie down on the couch because my stomach hurt. and fell asleep again for the rest of the day. #i tried not taking the new medication this morning too. because I only wanted to lie down for an hour #fuck this #it'd so stupid #I set so many alarms and none of them helped. not even the ones that I did hear #and I'm so. so. tired right now #I just want to sleep more #personal

[radioactive-cloud]

my mood swings lately are actually pretty embarrassing

#i feel unmotivated and pathetic and angry and lonely and sad and jealous #and also unsure of my hair colour and of my appearance in general and of everything i try to do #and i can't stop comparing myself to others although i know it's not good #nothing new tho #it will happen again #whining for the sake of whining #personal

[motionpicturessoundtrack]

your art is absolutely stunning

thank you everyone for your incredibly kind comments, asks and messages over the years! i don't answer too many here since i don't wanna spam peoples feeds or have this account get buried in "thank-you"s, but it all really means the world to me

#asks #i keep them all in a little word doc on my laptop #so whenever i feel unmotivated i go and read some of them #even if i dont respond directly please dont take it as me ignoring you #thank you again #love yall

[bizzybee429]

.

#blargh #sometimes i worry im never going to write again #first i was unmotivated #now concussed #now getting surgery again #last time i got surgery it killed my creativity for almost a whole year #and its been six months since i published anything #i dont want to go a whole nother year with feeling so sick and unmotivated #being disabled sucks. would not recommend

[ceabu]

trying to get out of art block somehow..............girls.......

#karkat vantas #gamzee makara #pale gamkar #gamkar #gamkat #homestuck #yes i made them girls again.......girl karkat is just so nice to draw lol #karkat in general is so easy to draw for me lol #gonna try n post some more drawings but im not promising anything lol i feel soooooooooooooo unmotivated #maybe cuz i lack like..........things that inspire me...... #should go watch a movie.......or something lol idk

[goldenguillotines]

morning gamers

#does a lil dance #confetti pop #Feeling it /neg #Really feeling like a kicked dog and going through it. Like idk i dont like being negative or venting online in spaces because its stupid #Feeling very why bother about everything again and unmotivated. Dont wanna make art.. and feeling annoying talking about stuff #Yippie!! #i just feel bad bad . like bad. #And it just feels like this bad is gonna keep going on for a very long time and i dont like that #anyways. Im going off to work

[yuriprince]

hrm weird brain mood

#thinking about disability again #how it took some fighting for my dad to agree to give me one (1) day of advance notice before he wants me to cook #at least i’m taking a step in the right direction by Telling Him lol. i really gotta work on my communication skills #but with how much convincing it took i started to wonder if it was even worth it y’know #like this is a stupid thing for me to need so badly #and he said that if i wasn’t feeling up to it i could just say no but. i feel like that comes with judgement #i don’t want to seem lazy or ungrateful or unmotivated #i don’t know. this is so stupid. i feel so stupid. #stormy day at the castle

[kaitaiga]

Apologies for literally falling off of tumblr lol I’ve just been in a slump these last couple of weeks and I really just needed to take a step back and get myself back in order again :|

Anyways, enjoy this little pic I took on a walk today :) The water was so still and the tide was high…not a cloud in the sky either…pretty.

#kaitaiga’s out and about #nothin much to say really #other than I’ve just been stuck in my head (and room) for a bit now #just completely unmotivated to do anything and falling behind in uni work too hhh #so then I was like ok enough is enough I actually need to do something to feel okay again #baby steps #I’ll be off for a little bit longer but I hope to be back soon :) #also tumblr’s kinda been draining me too idk why 🤷🏻‍♀️ #in my spare time I’ve also really just been enjoying playing honkai star rail…I love gepard sm #expect fan art of him sooner or later #I miss drawing Damien too… #miss u pookie bear

[mynameisbillandimaheadcase]

.

#the only thing that can fix me is either watching tlou for the first time again or watching arcane with someone #i feel so shitty #like really really shity #and it's not even that feel suicidal or anything #i just feel like just laying on bed until idk grow mushrooms on me #or just crawl into some dark and dusty corner and discompose there #melt like a real old jelly window sticker #like be left alone and peaceful to just not die i guess but fall apart like an old toy #idk #wierd felling #not pleasant #but also i kind off like it #i guess that's what melancholy is?? #too unmotivated to google it #just let me waste away i guess

[dolls-self-ships]

.

#hey guys I’m just gonna vent a bit #and it has a bit to do with self shipping so I’m gonna post it here #but lately I think I’ve just been like… idk so unmotivated to make content of my fos? #like don’t get me wrong I still love them all but #it used to be like so much fun and all consuming for me and like I would happily watch my f/os content over and over again #but lately it’s just been feeling … like.. not the same idk #like I’ll want to watch or see more pictures of hook but everytime I go to do it I’m like ‘but I’ve watched this 27 times already’ #and I’m bored before I even click on it #and I feel so bad ?? #like I’m falling out of love with self shipping or something #idk it’s hard to explain bc I still like.. do it and I still think about my f/so a lot #but since my ocd theme is very romantic/sexual orientation oriented it kind of like.. makes me romance and sex adverse sometimes #and rn I’ve been going through a really long period of that that makes me feel dissconnected from my f/os :( #it sucks bc it used to be a great source of a coping mechanism for me #but lately it’s just been different idk ;-; #I miss the days when I could just turn off my brain and obsess over my current blorbo and not worry about anything or anyone else #I love James so much but it’s like whenever I go to draw him and I doing something cute together halfway through I get unmotivated or I just #don’t get that same excitement feeling I used to #it might just be my new meds bc I know that they can kinda hinder romantic feelings and stuff #but man it sucks

[stevesnailbat]

to all the asks i get about my masterlist…im sorry besties i will not be getting to it any time soon 🫶🏻 xoxox sincerely me, depressed as fuck

#hii again i deleted the tumblr and discord app for a min not rly sure why #im so exhausted and unmotivated rn….. #also like actually starting to fully feel emotions of grief so 🫶🏻 a lot is happening #jen talks too much