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#finally this day has been a long time coming
swiftispunk · 12 hours
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spring breaks loose | joel miller x f!reader
a your summer dream one shot
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It's spring, you're young, you're lovely, you have a right to be happy. Come back into the world.
–Shirley Jackson, We Have Always Lived in the Castle
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pairing: joel miller x f!reader rating: 18+ word count: 11.2k
series warnings etc: [NO OUTBREAK] we'll call him dad's buddy!joel, fairly soft!joel, age difference (28/50), angst, smut (will specify with each chapter), fluff, alcohol, food, secret relationship until it's not.
chapter summary: building bridges and starting fresh. it's springtime in austin. chapter warnings: smut, lots of fluff, a sprinkling of angst, consensual somnophilia, unprotected p in v sex, creampie, squirting, vaginal fingering, oral (m receiving), alcohol + intoxication, reader is so very eepy, food, discussions of infidelity, a whole lot of dialogue and tying up loose ends, heather comes with her own warning, in this house we hate chris, time hop, pov swapping. no use of y/n.
a/n: we have reached the penultimate chapter of ysd (for real this time). thank you to everyone who has stuck around this long. thank you to @frannyzooey for helping me work out a few things in this chapter, @joelscruff for beta'ing, and @5oh5, who offered me plant guidance many moons ago now. i also wanted to just boost the fact that i do have a kofi account, and while there is never any pressure to tip, life is hard rn and i always always appreciate the help. love ya'll sm.
*lastly: be sure to see the very end of this post for a special SNEAK PEEK of the upcoming final chapter of your summer dream.
january
-
"I'm really happy," you insist, and in spite of it all, Joel's lips twitch up at the corners. You've told him how happy you are about a thousand times, but watching you confidently profess it to your father is something else entirely. 
"I'm really happy, okay?" you repeat, firm as you stare down the man across from him. Your father's face remains unchanged, stoic and blank as he nods. Joel swallows tightly as you nod back, and then you're gone.
Neither of the men utter a word until the back door swings shut behind you. Joel can feel your father's eyes on him, but he can't bring himself to meet them. He should say something. He clears his throat but then–   
"Joel...since Costa Rica?" your father asks. He doesn't sound angry, Joel notes. No, he sounds…hurt. 
At last, Joel looks up from the table, and your father stares back at him with obvious confusion in his eyes. Confusion and–as Joel had imagined–hurt. 
Joel sighs. 
"Yeah," he nods solemnly, shifting in his seat. "Yes."
Your dad just shakes his head, and Joel can practically see the cogs turning in his mind, playing back those days at the resort, piecing it all together in real time. 
"That whole time we were there, you–?"
"No–" Joel cuts him off. "Not…not the whole time."
Like that makes it better. Your father doesn't look at him, still lost in thought, still shaking his head defiantly. 
"I was…we were right across the hall. You–all that sneaking around–we–you–"
His rambling dissolves into incoherent sputtering until Joel finally chimes in again.
"I'm sorry," he says, and then he's shaking his head too, like he's just as much in disbelief about the whole thing as his best friend is. And he is, really. Couldn't believe it then, can hardly believe it now. "I know. I'm sorry."
"Goddamnit, Joel," your father suddenly exclaims, a palm coming down hard on the tabletop. His anger seems to catch up with him, as though Joel's quiet apology had somehow been the final nail in the coffin. "She's Sarah's age! I mean, that–that's my daughter!"
Joel swallows and sniffs back a heated flow of emotion. He knows he deserves it, deserves every bit of your father's ire. But that doesn't mean it doesn't sting, that feeling of being scolded by his oldest friend in the world. He shrinks a bit and crosses his arms over his chest defensively.
But he doesn't actually defend himself at all. For some reason, he digs the hole deeper. Maybe he's tired of lying. 
"Younger," he grumbles, staring down at his hands. 
"What?"
Joel clears his throat, cautiously daring to meet your father's accusatory glare. 
"She's younger than Sarah."
There's a long and painful beat of silence as your father sits back in his chair with a heavy, exasperated sigh. 
"What the hell is this, Joel?" he demands. Still biting, still cold, though not quite as infuriated. 
Joel seizes the opportunity. He leans forward, elbows on the table, pleading. Where to begin? He thinks about what he'd want to hear if the roles were reversed–and starts there.
"Everythin' was mutual, right from the start–I swear," Joel begins. "And I...I mean, I couldn't even remember the last time I seen her before that day at the airport. I ain't never even thought about her like that before. Then we were–spendin' all this time together, which you wanted us to do–"
"Uh-uh, don't you go puttin' this on me," your dad cuts in. "You know damn well this ain't what I had in mind."
Joel nods. 
"I know, I know," he agrees. "I didn't mean–sorry."
Your father doesn't respond. Joel sighs.
"Listen, she was hurtin', man–you don't know the half of what that boy did to her," Joel attempts to reason. "We got to talkin' about it all and I...I just wanted to be there for her, you know? And, sure, there was attraction there, she's a beautiful girl–"
"Alright, alright, alright," your father interrupts again, grimacing. "I don't need to hear about all that."
Joel nods again, swallowing back the words he'd been about to say–that the attraction had, miraculously, flown both ways. That you'd wanted him just as much as he'd wanted you. That he never would have sought you out if he hadn't known that was true. 
He contemplates his next words carefully. 
"Look, it wasn't right to keep it from you," Joel concedes eventually. "We–or, I–got caught up in it. You think I expected this? I mean she just–," Joel shakes his head, lost for words again as his cheeks warm and his lips curl into this fond little smile when he thinks of how completely and quickly you'd made a home for yourself in his heart, "She took me by surprise, man. But you know what it's like when you got a good thing goin'. You don't wanna risk losin' it."
Your dad just frowns, his mouth seemingly fused into a hard, unforgiving line. 
"Costa Rica was months ago, Joel."
Joel sighs. 
"I know. I know, okay? I wanted to tell you sooner. But she wasn't ready for that and I wasn't gonna go against her wishes."
Your father's jaw ticks as he chews on the inside of his cheek, thinking. Coldly assessing the man across from him like he's seeing him for the very first time. Joel crumbles under that stare, hates how it feels coming from someone he's known so long. 
"You know me, man," Joel pleads, wide eyes boring desperately into your father's. "You know me. When have I ever gone for someone younger? When have I ever even wanted that?"
Your father's face doesn't change but he also doesn't argue, so Joel goes on.
"All I wanna do–all I have ever wanted to do for that girl–is take care of her. And I-I know maybe it's…uncomfortable–"
Your father scoffs at the understatement of the century, and Joel can't help the way his own lips twitch upwards too. It's a moment of genuine camaraderie, of two fathers well aware of the absurdity of their situation. Their matching grins quickly fade, but nevertheless, Joel feels somewhat more at ease when he next speaks. 
"–but it's real," Joel concludes, "What we got. S'hard as it is to understand–and believe me, I ain't even sure I understand it, but…"
His voice trails off into a pensive sigh, mirrored by your father. There's another stretch of silence, but the air feels less tense now, a little less thick with disdain. Again, Joel ponders what he'd want to hear if he was in your father's shoes. What would give him the peace of mind to know this was okay?
"I'm…" he starts to say, but he's shocked to find the words get caught in his throat, obstructed by a sudden lump of emotion. He grunts past it, straightening his spine and squaring his shoulders while your father looks on with furrowed brows. 
"I'm in love with her," Joel finally manages, voice low and laced with devotion. 
It's infinitesimal, but Joel could swear he sees your father's eyes soften. 
"I ain't told her that yet," he continues. "But I think she knows. I think she's a smart girl, and I think she knows this is real, too. Hell, I don't think she'd'a stuck around this long if she didn't think I was serious about her. And so, I…I think you gotta trust her on this one. Even if you don't wanna trust me."
Your father crosses his arms over his chest and takes another long, weighty sigh. 
"Jesus Christ, Joel," he mutters, shaking his head down at the table. But it doesn't sound angry or even hurt anymore. It almost sounds teasing, and Joel almost laughs. 
"I know," he smirks. "Trust me, I know."
"S'pose I got no business tryna forbid it, do I?" your father says.
"She wouldn't let you even if you tried," Joel replies, grinning wider when he thinks of how you'd respond to that. You, so independent and sure of yourself. Yeah fucking right.
Your dad huffs out a single laugh. "Ain't that the truth."
Tentatively, both men sip at their drinks, falling back into something of a routine. It still feels…awkward. But the worst seems to have passed.
Meanwhile, Joel's heart is pounding in his chest as the reality of his admission catches up with him. He loves you. He's in love with you. He's never said it out loud before. His entire body suddenly aches with the need to see you, just so he can say it again and again and again. 
Joel polishes off his drink, pursing his lips around the burn of whiskey on his tongue. The two men lock eyes, and Joel thinks maybe–maybe–he can see the early signs of forgiveness there. 
"I get it f'you need some time," Joel says. "Guess I just…wanna make sure me n' you are gonna be alright."
Joel's best friend sighs, before nodding slowly and sympathetically. 
"Yeah," he grunts. "Yeah, we'll be alright. C'mon–"
He cocks his head to the side as he rises up out of his chair and Joel hastily follows suit. Your father pulls him into an affable, if somewhat unsure, embrace, firmly patting his palms over Joel's upper back. Joel returns the hug instinctively.
"Don't fuck this up, Miller," your father grumbles over Joel's shoulder.
Joel chuckles, honestly grateful for the familiar ribbing. "Won't. Promise."
That's about the time you come charging back through the door.
-
four months later
-
A blanket of grey coats the early-April sky above, a telltale sign of rain to come. It's appropriately ominous, you think, considering what you're about to do.
Joel herds you toward his truck in the driveway with a hand on your lower back, but something in your periphery gives you pause. A glimpse of colour that hadn't been there before, stopping you in your tracks about halfway down his front steps. 
"Those are new."
Joel stops too, following your eye line as he casually throws an arm across your shoulders. He smiles when he sees what you see, letting you guide him a little closer to what had once been an unassuming, mostly barren patch of dirt on his front lawn. Now, poking out from the otherwise lifeless bushes are a handful of tulips, vivid green stems giving way to pink and yellow petals, tentatively blooming in spite of the day's limited sunlight. 
"Oh…yeah," Joel shrugs. "Sarah and I planted 'em. Years ago. Grow back every year around this time."
You're not sure why that stirs something in you. But it does. 
Joel Miller has tulips in his garden.
Curiously, you inch towards them, crouching to delicately curl your fingers around the unfurling petals.
"They're beautiful," you muse. You turn to face him and find he's watching you with equal curiosity. "Pink and yellow?"
"She picked the pink."
"Adds up," you nod. "What made you go with yellow?"
He stares at your fingers fiddling with the stems, and shrugs. You think he seems a little shy. 
"Can't remember," he says. "They're sunny, I guess. Bright."
A tightness knots in your throat as he reaches out beside you to touch his own fingers to the petals, softly running his thumbs against them, seemingly deep in thought. You think of a younger Joel Miller, picking out yellow tulip seeds to plant with his daughter because they reminded him of the sun. A younger Joel Miller digging holes in the Earth to lay down his roots, burying a memory only to watch it grow back, year after year. A sure thing, a constant. Always there even if you can't see them.
Of course Joel Miller has tulips in his garden. 
"What?" he probes after a moment of prolonged silence. You clear your throat. 
"Nothing," you smile, craning to kiss his cheek and feeling the low rumble of his responding chuckle against your lips. "I love you."
He cups a hand over your face before you can get too far, pressing his mouth to yours in a deeper, far less chaste kiss. 
"I love you too," he murmurs as he pulls away. 
You're still thinking about the tulips as Joel backs out of the driveway, and the first of the day's raindrops begin to hit his windshield. You make your way out of the safety of the cul-de-sac, and with the low hum of the radio playing in the background, you count the houses on the street outside your window in an attempt to calm your nervous mind. 
Joel doesn't interrupt your silence. But as you merge onto the freeway, your heart begins to pound–and you decide you need a distraction. 
"It's nice they grow back every year," you say absently out the window. 
"Hm?" Joel's brows furrow as he glances over at you, sitting with your chin atop your fist and staring out at the steadily increasing rainfall. He quickly catches up with your train of thought. "Oh, the tulips. Yeah, it is nice. 'Specially after Sarah left. They always reminded me of her."
You nod and make some noncommittal humming sound. Talking was a stupid idea actually. 
As ever, Joel notes your demeanour. 
"You alright?" he asks, taking your hand across the centre console and squeezing three distinct times. 
You sigh.
"Just nervous."
"You'll be fine," he insists lightly, not for the first time. "I reckon she's a lot more nervous'n you are."
You can't argue with that. Heather is the one who fucked your ex-boyfriend. Heather is the one working to make amends. Heather is the one who threw away your friendship and is now asking for it back. 
"Yeah, that's probably true," you agree quietly. 
Joel sighs. He lifts your conjoined hands to his mouth to lay a kiss against your knuckles, keeping his eyes on the road as he does. 
"Just…remember, you're not goin' there to forgive her or to…pretend like nothin' happened," he says. "But I think you'll feel better once y'get this all hashed out."
"I know you're right," you nod, allowing the truth of his words to wash over you as you take another steadying breath and lean your head back into the seat behind you. "I just feel like I-I've been carrying the weight of this for too fucking long. I have to let it go. I'm doing the right thing."
It's a mantra you have to keep reminding yourself of–you're doing the right thing. Not just from a being the bigger person standpoint, but for you. You need to do this so you can close this chapter of your life for good. 
"You're takin' the time to hear her out after all the shit she put you through," Joel goes on. "Makes you a better person than most people I know."
The pride and adoration in his voice makes warmth bloom in your tummy, but you roll your eyes all the same–out of habit more than anything else. 
"I don't know about that."
"I do."
His gaze darts in your direction again, and there is no trace of a lie in that look. So you choose not to fight him, just smile tightly and accept his reassurance, falling back into comfortable quiet for the rest of your drive. 
By the time he pulls up in front of the cafe you'd agreed to meet Heather at, your nerves have returned tenfold. Is she already inside? You're ten minutes early so maybe not. Is it better if you're here first or would that make her feel weird? Why are you worried about making her feel weird?  
God, it never used to feel this terrifying to see your best friend. You have half a mind to ask Joel to wait with you but ultimately decide against it. You need to be a big girl about this. 
"I can do this," you tell yourself instead. 
"You can," Joel agrees, taking you in his arms and pressing a kiss to the top of your head. "Call me if it goes south and I'll come pick y'up, alright?"
You nod resolutely as you unravel yourself from his hold. 
"'Kay. Thank you."
"Good luck, baby girl."
With one last parting kiss, Joel lets you go, watching you from the driver's seat until you disappear behind the door of the cafe.
-
Heather is not there yet, as it turns out, and you can't tell if that makes this better or worse. 
Now you're faced with new dilemmas. Should you order her a coffee? You haven't seen her in eight months; what if she takes it differently now? 
She fucked your boyfriend–why would you buy her a coffee? the pettier part of you wonders.
And that's…true, you suppose.
So you buy yourself a latte and get it in a to-go cup, find a seat at a two-person table in the back of the dining room and wait. But not for long.
Barely five minutes later and Heather is coming through the door. She spots you and there's a moment of awkward uncertainty as you half-rise from your chair, the both of you waving at each other before Heather gestures to the line at the till. You nod and retake your seat.
You resist the urge to text Joel. You can do this. You can do this on your own.
Heather settles up, cautiously setting her coffee cup on the table beside yours and you're not sure why–instinct or something–but you stand when she gets there, and let her pull you into a hug. 
"Hi, babe." Her voice is thick and her arms are tight around you. And, goddamnit, for everything she put you through, there is a familiarity in that embrace, something long-forgotten in the warmth of her voice. 
"Hey," you murmur, letting her squeeze you in tighter before you both pull away. "Hey."
She assesses you with wide, wet eyes, hands still resting on your shoulders.
"You look amazing," she says.
"Thanks."
"I don't even know where to start," she shakes her head. "Thank you for seeing me."
"Of course." Like you hadn't stewed over it for literal weeks.
"Why don't I just–I mean, I have to–"
You can see her struggling, and you can't help but sympathize. She was always the more confident of the two of you, always more direct and brave–but in that warm kind of way that used to always put you at ease. Now, she seems completely lost, awkwardly taking a seat and waiting for you to do the same. She clutches her hands around her coffee cup and you don't think you've ever seen her look so small. 
"I am…so fucking sorry," she finally says. She doesn't shy away from you when she says it, and you have to respect her courage for that. She looks you dead in the eyes and doesn't avert her stare even once. 
You swallow tightly. "I know."
"Can I…would you let me explain?"
"Actually, Heather," you say, straightening in your seat a bit to steel yourself. Heather's face falls, until you go on, "Can I go first? I just need to say my piece and then, yes, you can explain."
She's nodding furiously before you even get the words out.
"Of course, yes, oh my god, please."
She sits back, probably gearing up for the lashing of a lifetime. It's not quite what you have planned but–
"You really hurt me. You and Chris. Whatever the story is, whatever went down, it doesn't change the fact that what you two did just... completely fucked me up. My entire life changed overnight because of you. I spent so many days crying, screaming, trying to just...figure out what I'd done to deserve that. Why wasn't I enough? Why wasn't I good enough for Chris? Why wasn't I a good enough friend to you? Like, if I was a better friend to you maybe you wouldn't have done that to me, you know?"
Fat tears slowly well in Heather's eyes as you speak, finally spilling over as you near the end of your monologue. But she doesn't interrupt or argue, and for that, you're grateful.
"I wondered about all of that for a really long time," you continue. "In those first few days when it was hardest...and for so many months after. But...I'm okay now. I think actually it all kind of worked out in the end, as crazy as that sounds."
At least it had all brought you to Joel.
"But I just needed you to know what it did to me. I think it's important that you know."
Heather hastily swipes at her tears, blinking them away and nodding her agreement.
"And that's it, that's all I have to say," you conclude. The weight on your shoulders feels lighter already. "You don't have to say anything back but...I do want to hear you out. You can...you can tell me what happened now."
That was the point of all this after all, you guess. 
Heather takes a deep, shaky breath. You sip your coffee. 
"Okay. Well, fuck. Okay. I had feelings for Chris," she begins. "But I never–I never dreamed of acting on them while you two were together, you have to know that. It wasn't premeditated or-or-or something I actively thought about–"
"I never thought that."
It's true. Heather's a lot of things, but she's not conniving. 
"Okay," she nods, seeming genuinely relieved. "Good. I mean, it still doesn't make it right, I know that. But he–"
She cuts herself off, a nervous shiver passing over her. Her courage wanes, and she looks down at the table as she dives into the part of her story that neither of you wants you to relive. 
"That night at your birthday party, he started telling me things. He…"
Her voice trails off again, and you can understand her fears, but you need to know this. Whatever it is.
"Heather, it's okay, you can tell me."
She glances up at you. You make your resolve as clear as possible on your face until you see her nod. 
"What happened was…I was drunk and I-I told him how I felt," she continues. "I shouldn't have done that, I know that. But that's when he started saying all this stuff about how he wasn't happy and how he was planning to break up with you. He-he said he'd always wanted to be with me instead."
She stops, peeking up at you, but the only response you can offer her is a curt little,
"Oh."
Interesting. He'd made no indication of his unhappiness to you. 
"In that moment, I just…I believed him. I should have just come straight to you but I let my stupid feelings get in the way and I–"
"He can definitely be very convincing," you say bitingly. Heather almost laughs, but quickly reins herself in. 
"It's no excuse, and I know that," she says. "I just really thought he meant it. That he was going to end it with you and choose me instead. Not that that would have been okay either, but. God, in hindsight, I just was not thinking clearly at all."
Heather buries her face in her hands but it's getting hard to focus. You're flitting back through memories, trying to piece things together. Had there been signs? Since meeting Joel, you're acutely aware that you hadn't been as happy as you could have been with Chris, but you can't ever recall letting that on at the time. And you certainly can't recall Chris ever letting on his unhappiness. It doesn't add up. 
"Then he did end it with you and you went to Costa Rica and I felt like, 'Okay, this is what he'd promised,' but…I could tell right away he was having second thoughts. All of a sudden, he's changing his tune, saying he wants to get back together with you and basically telling me I could just be like a-like a side piece or something."
At that, you scoff mirthlessly. Of course.
That's why he hadn't let anything on. He'd been trying to have his cake and eat it too. Motherfucker. 
"Yeah," Heather goes on. "So I said, 'Fuck you' and I walked. I was already feeling terrible about what I'd done to you and that just settled it for me."
"Fuck," you sigh, pinching at a pressure point between your eyes.
"And I haven't talked to him once since then," Heather insists. She reaches across the table and wraps a hand around your wrist, and you let her. "I promise."
You place your own hand over hers–again operating on some kind of deep-seated instinct. 
"Thank you," you tell her. "For–I don't know, for being honest."
"I would've told you everything sooner if you'd have let me–"
"I know."
"But I know–I know you needed your time. You didn't have to hear me out at all, and I would have deserved that. I take full responsibility, I do, but, my god, babe–," Heather's lips pull up in a smirk and you share a knowing glance, "–that guy fucking sucks."
You could try to fight the way your own face contorts into a grin, but you don't. 
"Yeah," you agree. "He really fucking does."
There's a short beat of silence, filled with the sounds of your uncertain, quiet laughter.
"Are we okay?" Heather finally asks tentatively, letting your arm go. "Or–shit. Sorry. You don't have to answer that."
"No–it…I don't know yet," you say truthfully. "But, you know, I don't think you deserve what he did to you, either. And I'm sorry."
"I'm okay now. All I really care about is you."
You smile at each other tightly–uncertainly–and sip quietly at your coffees. She doesn't demand forgiveness or push the subject further. You think the air feels just a little clearer now, a little more like before.
"So what's new with you?" she chimes in after a moment. "How've you been? You never post on Instagram anymore."
Your smile turns a little shy as you debate telling her about Joel. But her gaze is so earnest and curious, it makes you want that normalcy, to be able to gush to your best friend about the man you've fallen in love with. 
"Well," you shrug, sitting up a little straighter in your chair. "I'm seeing someone."
Heather's jaw drops in genuine delight, her eyes going wide with wonder.
"No way! Tell me everything."
And you do. You tell her all about Joel and Costa Rica, and every perfect moment since. Heather gasps and squeals at all the appropriate times and you find yourself remembering why it feels so good to have someone to talk about these things with. It's so validating to watch someone be as excited about your love life as you feel about it. 
"Wait," she interrupts, early on in your retelling, "If he's your dad's friend–how old is he?"
You bite your lip, hardly bashful about it these days, but after the disaster that was telling your parents, you never know how someone could react anymore.
"He's in his fifties," you confess.
Heather's hands come up over her mouth, but her eyes are swimming with barely-contained glee.
"Shut up, oh my god," she exclaims. Her initial shock fades into awe, and when her hands fall from her face, you think she looks kind of impressed, "Damn, girl. That's hot. Is he hot?"
You smile. "He's so fucking hot."
When you're home later, you'll have to remember to tell Joel how good it had felt to brag about him. You're sure he'll act coy, but you know it'll make his ego bloom, just a little bit.
It goes on like that as the minutes pass, you catching Heather up on the whirlwind that the last eight months or so have been. She looks kind of proud, and that feels good too. You're so proud of Joel, proud of the life you've built together, the way he's taught you so much about yourself and helped you grow into this new, happier person. It's nice to have someone else see that.
"So, your mom still doesn't approve?" she asks once you've got her fully up to speed.
You shrug. "Not as far as I know. I haven't spoken to her since that night we told them."
"Oh, babe."
You just shrug again, pushing back on her sympathetic gaze. 
"Maybe she just needs some time," Heather posits, "I mean, you seem so happy. She'll see that eventually."
"Maybe, yeah."
Heather offers you her own scoop after that, telling you all about how she's been busy working on herself, taking courses to get her yoga-teaching license and enjoying being single for the time being–though she does work in a few stories of some particularly exciting hook-ups. She seems well, and in spite of everything, you're happy for her. 
What's more, you kind of don't want your time with her to end. She seems to sense it too.
"Hey, do you want to maybe grab a drink? Like, a real drink?" she offers once your take-out cups are empty and the cafe's traffic has slowed to an early-evening lull. 
"Yeah, okay, fuck it," you agree with a shrug. Heather smiles excitedly before excusing herself to the bathroom, leaving you to check your phone for the first time in hours.
Everything good? reads a text from Joel. 
all good, you reply, i'll be a little later than i thought. 
Take yr time. Love you.
love you too.
-
A cocktail deep, pop music blaring, and a plate of nachos between you; this is true familiarity with Heather.  
You're finally starting to feel some semblance of comfortable, and it feels fucking good. To laugh with an old friend, even if there's still that faint undercurrent of distrust there. You imagine it won't ever fully go away. The minutes tick by, and while that distant uncertainty never fades, it gets easier. It gets fun.
"So, be honest," Heather says, diving headfirst into her second blended margarita. Her eyes sparkle with a devious little glint and you already have a feeling what she's going to ask. "This guy…he's in his fifties, right?"
"Right," you grin. 
"So like…what's the sex like?"
Your grin widens as a warmth floods your cheeks. You think about Joel, his patience and his generosity, his big cock and his skillful hands. His curiosity and his devotion, every new experience he's offered you and how genuinely thrilled he seems to do so. You try not to think about it for long, though, because your tummy is already fluttering in a way it really shouldn't be in public.
"Honestly," you say, sipping at your drink coyly. "I don't think it could possibly be any better."
Heather makes a delighted little noise, practically bouncing her chair. 
"Oh my god, okay…but what about like, his stamina?"
"Um," you laugh. "Hasn't been an issue yet."
"I love this for you so much, babe," she smiles and it sounds like she really means it. "Can I see what he looks like?"
You have no qualms saying no to that. You may be stupidly in love, but you don't think it's biased of you to find Joel Miller beautiful. It's simply an objective truth. And it feels good to show him off.
You pull your phone out of your purse and flash Heather your lockscreen–a picture of Joel on the beach in Costa Rica, salt-and-pepper curls tousled in the breeze, soft belly poking out over his swim trunks, smiling at you over his broad shoulders.
"Oh my god," Heather repeats, yanking your phone right out of your hand for a better look. She taps the screen to keep it alive as she stares between the picture and you, smiling triumphantly across from her. "Whoa."
"Mhm," you smirk, your chest swelling with pride. 
“That's a man, baby," she commends you, handing back your phone. You sneak a parting glance down at the image of Joel on your screen before locking it. Heather sits back against the booth behind her, shaking her head in wonder. "And he sounds like he's so good to you."
You nod, sighing dreamily. "Yeah...he's the best."
"Good. You deserve that."
It's honestly a touching sentiment, one that makes you warm and soft. You didn't know how nice it would feel to have just one person in your life accept your relationship with Joel without any convincing at all. You share a smile and clink your glasses. 
"I need an older man," Heather jokes, the sincerity of the moment quickly dissipating. "I'm so sick of boys."
"Joel certainly puts Chris to shame, that's for sure," you admit candidly. 
Heather huffs. "Yeah, well, that's not saying much, is it?"
You almost squirt your drink out through your nose. 
"Sorry, oh my god," Heather laughs, but it's too late. And it's probably wrong, but you don't care. You both descend into a fit of giggles at your ex's expense, and something about it feels weirdly cathartic.
-
It's like old times after that. Easier to forget the drama when you're three drinks deep and laughing so much. You're comfortably drunk in a way you haven't been in a while, falling quickly back into your usual repartee with Heather. You feel lighter–freer–as you and Heather find your way to the dance floor and pick up basically where you'd left off nearly a year ago.
You also miss Joel.
He's being respectful, clearly trying to give you space, texting you to be safe when you'd let him know you'd be staying out a little longer. And that's nice and all, but you've talked about him so much tonight, and for all the fun you're having, you just want his arms around you and his lips on yours again. 
"Didn't we go to high school with that guy?" Heather leans in close as you dance, effectively distracting you.
You follow her stare across the bar, averting your gaze the second you lock eyes with a handsome stranger leaning against the far wall. He's with a friend, and the two of them eye you and Heather with unabashed interest.
"Which one?" you giggle. 
"The one on the left!"
You peek over at the men again, honing in on the one on the left. He does kind of look familiar. He's also still watching the two of you curiously.
"Uh…" you wrack your brain, trying to recall. It feels like a lifetime ago.
"Tom!" Heather exclaims. You shake your head. 
"That doesn't sound right."
"No, it is! Tom from the basketball team, remember?" 
You look over again, but it's still not clicking. Maybe you're drunker than you'd thought.
"He's kinda cute," Heather murmurs slyly in your ear. You grin. 
The man is tall and lean, light-haired and certainly good-looking enough. A little older than both of you, but younger than the broader, burlier man beside him. You think maybe they could be brothers. 
"Do you want to say hi?" you ask her. 
Heather shakes her head.
"I have a better idea," she winks.
She grabs your hand and guides you to the bar, leaning against it and lengthening her body ever so. It doesn't take long before the men are coming up beside you like clockwork. 
You could always count on Heather to find a way to get free drinks.
"What are you drinking, ladies?" the younger one implores confidently, placing an elbow on the bar top beside Heather. "Oh shit, do I know you?"
"I want a shot," Heather says, ignoring his question. "You guys want a shot?"
"Fuck, yeah–whiskey alright?"
"Tequila," Heather smirks definitively.
-
Despite being out of practice, you haven't lost the ability to recognize good vibes from bad. And the guys give off good vibes. Especially once you all collectively figure out that you did indeed go to high school together. 
You shoot a pointed look at Heather when the younger one tells you his name is, in fact, Tim. 
"From the basketball team, though, right?" Heather asks. Tim frowns.
"Actually, it was water polo," he says.
"Water polo!" Heather repeats, looking at you with open arms and winking. You try to conceal your giggling. "Of course, I remember now."
Tim grins bashfully, even though you are sure Heather most certainly does not remember. 
You cheers to the Ravens and down your shots and then Tim ushers Heather back to the dance floor. You happily let her go. Tim seems kind of goofy, consistently making Heather throw her head back in laughter and it honestly feels nice to watch her look so content. You think about how Joel had made you feel those first few days in Costa Rica, when you'd still been reeling with all that heart ache. 
You think about how much resentment you'd harboured for Heather back then, and while it's not totally gone, there's a sense of kinship there now too. Chris had hurt you both, and you know all too well how healing it had been to find someone willing to stitch up the wounds he'd left. You want that for Heather. 
Goddamnit, you miss Joel. 
You imagine showing him off to all your old high school friends like he was some kind of trophy husband at a class reunion. You'd walk into the gymnasium, hanging confidently off his arm and everyone there would turn and stare. They'd all whisper about his age, you bet. Call you mean names behind the bleachers and gossip about whether or not he was your sugar daddy. Thinking like that used to make you anxious, now it makes you grin. 
"You want another drink?"
The other guy, Mike, is still sitting with you at the bar. He is Tim's brother, though you don't recognize him at all. Two years older and visiting from Philly, he's pretty clearly into you. But the conversation has been easy and he hasn't tried anything weird, so you don't think too much of it. You regale him about all your favourite local taquerias and what you studied in college, conscious of the way he seems just a little bit too interested in all of it. 
But you definitely don't need another drink, bordering on the better side of too drunk, and as nice as he is, you think it's probably best not to lead him on any longer. 
"Actually, I think I might head out soon."
"That's cool," Mike shrugs, polishing off the beer in his hand. "Wanna go grab a bite? Keep hangin' out?"
He sounds casual enough, but there's also an air of hopefulness in his voice. 
"Oh, that's okay." You clear your throat, suddenly nervous at the thought of quashing that hope. "I'm, um, I'm actually spoken for."
Unconsciously, your fingers fly to the shell around your neck, fiddling idly with the chain. Mike's eyes follow the motion.
Much to your relief, Mike smiles, seemingly unbothered. 
"Makes sense," he nods. His eyes trail up and down your body in a way that makes your cheeks burn. It also really makes you miss Joel. He's the only one you want looking at you like that. 
"Well, he's a lucky guy, whoever he is," Mike says with a wink. 
"Yeah," you agree fondly. "He is."
-
It's a quarter past eleven when Joel finally hears a car pull up outside. Two minutes later and your key is turning in the door, Henry bounding off the bed beside him to greet you downstairs. 
"Hi, baby boy!"
Your voice, high-pitched and much too loud, cuts through the quiet of his home. He smiles to himself as he listens to you kick your shoes off, murmuring unintelligible nonsense to Henry as you both make your way back up to the bedroom. Joel sets his book on the nightstand and tilts his glasses down his nose, sitting up straighter until you emerge in the doorway with Henry in your arms and a crooked smile plastered across your face. 
"Hey, sweetheart," he smirks.
You visibly soften at the sight of him, Henry spilling out of your grip.
"Hi," you whine.
Joel can't quite get a read on your energy, watching you curiously strip off your jeans and crawl up the mattress till you're splayed out on top of him.    
"Mmmm, Joel," you sigh dreamily as you make yourself at home across his chest. 
"I take it that went alright?" he asks, wrapping an arm around your neck to stroke the back of your head. You practically purr into his sternum and the sound makes his insides turn.
"Yes," you nod, before pressing both hands into his shoulders to push yourself up so you're straddling him, "But, Joel…"
Now face to face, you appear a bit dazed as you blink down at him, an adorable little pout painting your features. Joel smirks, raising his eyebrows expectantly as he waits for you to finish your thought.
"I missed you so much," you conclude, catching him off guard when you fist the front of his t-shirt and dive forward to slant your mouth over his.
You plunge your tongue between his lips and Joel can taste tequila there, can feel it too in the way you're kissing him; sloppy, hungry, eager. 
"Only been gone a few hours, sweetheart," he chuckles against your lips.
"I know, but…after the cafe, we went drinking and–"
"No shit."
With what appears to be considerable effort, you push yourself off his chest and point an accusatory finger in his face. Your eyes narrow and Joel thinks you look a little too adorable for your own good. 
"Watch it, Miller."
Joel grins. 
"Mmmm, or what?" he hums, tracing his palms up and over your sides, which seems to distract you for a moment, your eyelids fluttering as a minute shiver visibly courses through you. You quickly pull yourself together.
Your blissful features quickly dissolve back into an overdone pout and Joel watches with amusement as you pry his fingers off your body. He could resist, but he doesn't, honestly just curious–and maybe a little turned on–as you collect his wrists in your hands and pin his arms down on the mattress beside his head.
Seemingly content with your work, you hold him there with eyebrows raised–and Joel decides to let you have the win. 
"Can I finish my story, please?"
"Yes, ma'am," he smirks. You bristle at that but otherwise manage to stay on track.
"We went drinking, and it was really, really fun," you go on. You shift your weight slightly, and Joel smirks when he catches the moment you lose your train of thought at the feeling of his hardening cock beneath you. 
"And?" he presses.
"I-I think I'm still mad at her…but it was…nice."
"That's good, baby," Joel murmurs, experimentally rolling his hips upwards just to watch your eyelids flutter. "I'm real proud of ya."
You exhale, making a sound that's almost a sob as you abandon your grip around his wrists to fold yourself over his chest again. You greedily kiss his neck and his ears and his face, and Joel lets you. Your drunken desperation is making him harder than he'd like to admit, and it's pretty fucking endearing to watch you suck your little marks into his skin with no inhibitions whatsoever.
"I talked about you a lot," you smile, clumsily resituating yourself so you're lying against his side, folding yourself in half so you're speaking the words against his belly. 
"Yeah?" He rests his hand on the back of your skull, chuckling at the way you keen into his touch. "Talked about me how?"
"Wouldn't you like to know," you sneer just as you curl your fingers under the waistband of his boxers.
"What're you doin' there, baby girl?"
You peer up at him with a devastating puppy-dog stare, all wide-eyed and needy. "I missed your cock. I just wanna suck on it a little."
"Jesus," Joel breathes. He's powerless to fight you then as you tug his boxers down his thighs to reveal his semi-hard cock. He really shouldn't let you in this state but you're already wrapping your fingers around him and tonguing at his slit and it's too fucking late now. He stiffens fully in your grasp and promptly loses any will to stop you.
Then you close your lips around his length and take him as deep as you can, moaning like he's just given you the sweetest gift in the world. 
"Fuck, yeah, you missed it," he grunts as you begin to bob, downright eager with it, if not lacking some of your usual finesse. You coat his cock with sloppy strings of saliva and move on him in an uneven rhythm but Joel's not gonna argue with a hot, wet mouth. Joel is more than happy to watch you take what you want from him. 
"Messy girl," he remarks affectionately, stroking a palm down your spine to your ass, firmly cupping your cheek in his hand. "This all you wanted? Just to come home and let me stuff that pretty little mouth?"
"Mhm," you hum blissfully around him, spluttering a bit as you swallow him down again.
"Fuck, that's a good girl," he groans.
At that, you whimper, your cheek falling into his belly with your mouth still closed around his cock. You keep up the motions of your mouth for a moment, humming and moaning around him as you draw precum from his tip and suck it down greedily until he feels your jaw slowly begin to slacken.
He pets your hair and your body goes loose, heavy where it lays across his middle.
Joel can sense a shift in you then, your eagerness fading even as you continue to lap at his tip. Your fingers feel a little weaker around his shaft but you don't let up, lazily jerking him until he feels your hand go still, your lips barely grazing him anymore. You offer him a few wet, open-mouthed kisses to the head of his cock and then you go limp.
Joel waits a moment to be sure, peeking down at you questioningly.
Sure enough, you're asleep. 
"Oh, baby," Joel sighs fondly. He squeezes your ass but you don't stir. Your slow, steady breathing lets him know you're really out, his hard cock forgotten in your grasp. You'll probably be embarrassed in the morning, but Joel's just stupidly endeared, hoisting you up into his arms and ignoring your half-conscious sounds of protest. 
"C'mere, sweetheart, there you go."
He nestles up behind you, cradling you into his chest with his cock pressed against your ass. You shimmy back into him and Joel tries to ignore the ache, tells himself it'll feel better to fuck you in the morning when you've sobered up anyway. He reaches back to turn off the lamp on the nightstand and you whine at the loss of his body against yours. 
"Joel," you whisper as he retakes his place behind you. "Did you come?"
He fights for his life not to burst out laughing. You're so goddamn cute.
"No, baby," he murmurs, kissing his favourite spot behind your ear. "Made me feel real fuckin' good, though. You can make me come tomorrow, alright?"
You hum contentedly, already drifting back to sleep. Joel pulls you in tighter, whispers that he loves you even though he doesn't think you can hear him, and it's not long before he's following behind you.
-
His alarm wakes him just as a beam of sunlight passes through his window, but it doesn't have the same effect on you.
You snooze peacefully with your back adhered to his chest, the gentle curve of your ass still flush against his cock. Your panties are gone; had you gotten up in the night? He can't remember now. It doesn't matter anyway, not when he can feel the heat of your body this close, bare flesh all soft and warm against him as the memory of the night before floods his senses. He'd fallen asleep with his dick still hard–aching–and within seconds of being awake, he's right back where you'd left him last night. 
Not that it's uncommon for Joel to wake up horny when he sleeps next to you, but it's worse like this, worse that he's already felt your lips on his cock just a few hours prior, without getting the chance to come down your throat.
"Hey," he murmurs into your hair, but you don't wake up. You just move your hips backwards unconsciously, the hard length of his cock pressing warm between your cheeks. Driving him fucking crazy and you don't even know it.
Joel growls, a low, carnal sound he barely recognizes as he trails a hand down the side of your body. He cups your ass in his palm and spreads your cheeks apart, the tips of his fingers just barely grazing your hole. You shiver and Joel smirks. Sound asleep and you still respond to having your ass played with. Something about knowing you so well makes him that much harder. 
Pliant and gone, you let him play with you, hands traversing every inch of your skin, up and over your belly to cup your breasts. His breath ragged in your ear, he gently twists your nipples just to feel them come alive under his touch. You squirm for him and Joel responds in turn, unable to help himself as he begins to slowly rut his hips against you. 
"Sweet thing," he husks, feeling his touch grow rougher on your hipbone, your ass flush against his bulge as he grinds into you like a fucking teenager. "You don't even fuckin' know. Got no idea what you’re doin' to me, do you?"
He knows you can't hear him. Right now, he doesn't care. 
He's wanted you like this since Costa Rica, too nervous to ask until you'd given him the okay all those months ago now. He's had you so many ways, and still you say you want more. He's not sure what he ever did to deserve you, but if one thing's been true from the start, it's that Joel Miller is not strong enough to deny you anything. 
Something about this, though, feels decidedly selfish. His hand on your thigh, positioning your pliant muscles to his liking, bending your leg at the knee just so he can spread you open wider, slip his fingers between your ass cheeks and scrape them over your bare pussy; that's for him. 
The sticky wetness he feels there–that's his. 
Your spine arching in your sleep when he sinks two fingers into your warm, dripping hole–that's because of him. 
"Still want it, baby?" he hums as he pumps his fingers in and out. "Still want this cock?"
He doesn't wait for you to answer. For once, he just takes. 
You put up no resistance as he replaces his fingers with his cock, pulling your body back into him until his hips meet your ass.
"Fuck," he hisses as he bottoms out.
You're so warm, so tight and inviting and perfect around him.
You're so wet, slick pools of arousal coating the hairs on his lower belly, sticking to your skin where it touches his.
And you're so soft, all gooey and loose in his arms as he slowly rocks into you, as close as he can possibly get and somehow never close enough. 
"S'my good girl," he breathes, "Take it just like that for me. Finish what you started, huh?"
He moves without haste, content just to feel you like this, close and confined under the covers. Experimentally, he reaches around you to touch his fingers to your clit, sighing in amazement when your pussy clenches on his cock, a wave of slick gathering at the place you're connected.
"Yeah? That feel good?" he says to no one as he gently circles your pearl. He's rewarded with a breathy little moan, the prettiest fucking sound he's ever heard. His hips snap against yours with more force now, jostling you with you every thrust. He can feel his control waning, and he's gonna wake you up soon if he's not careful. 
Maybe he's done being careful. 
Cock still buried inside you, he rolls you both so he's lying above you, your body prone to the mattress beneath him. Your fingers curl into little fists and then you gasp, eyelids fluttering against the light of morning. Something dark and animalistic twists in him when he watches the awareness creep across your face, the way your features contort and you strain to look back over your shoulder, piecing it all together. 
"Oh my god," you whine when it clicks. "Joel, fuck, fuck–ohmygodJoel–"
"Shh, I know, baby, I know…I got you, you're okay," he babbles, folding over you to nip hungrily at your shoulders. You throw your head back and expose the column of your neck to him and Joel bites down there too just because he can. "Just had to feel you like this. You were so wet."
"Oh, fuck," you cry, voice still hoarse with sleep as Joel pounds into you harder. No reason to hold back now. "Fuck yes, Joel, take it."
"Yeah?"
"Please."
That's all he needs to hear.
With his arms wrapped firmly around your middle, Joel sits back onto his knees, taking you with him as he drapes you over his thighs and pulls you down onto his length. Your body still feels weak with sleep, almost passive in his grasp in a way he's not sure he should enjoy so much. He doesn't overthink it. 
What he does is find your clit again, massaging his fingers over the bundle of nerves while he thrusts his cock up into you. A wanton moan pours from your throat and Joel catches it in a messy, open-mouthed kiss. 
"There you go, there you go," Joel rambles when he feels you start to quiver, your pussy constricting around him as you spill listless, needy sounds of pleasure onto his lips. "Feels so good, don't it? Wakin' up with a cock inside you. This is what you wanted. Yeah? You gonna come?"
"Yesyes, fuck, yes Joel, I'm coming–"
"I know," he grins, "I know, baby."
He knows because he feels it. He feels you pulse around his length, feels your muscles seize and loosen, feels your little clit twitch beneath his fingers as he coaxes you through your high. He also feels something new, something wet and warm and sinful. 
"Oh, good girl," he groans. "Fuck–look at that."
You're gushing for him, liquid pouring out over his fingers and his cock and his balls, staining the sheets beneath you. You writhe in his arms but Joel just keeps fucking you, fucks you until he's drawn every last drop from you. Fucks you until he's coming too, clutching you against him as his cock spasms between your walls and paints your insides with spend. Hot cum leaks out around his length, drips down your inner thighs, and makes a mess of your already messy pussy. 
He comes and comes and then it ends, strangled moans fading into ragged breaths and heady grunts of release. 
"Jesus," Joel pants into the hollow of your ear as he slowly comes down. "You alright?"
"Yes," you sigh. "Holy shit, thank you, Joel. Thank you."
He's got no fucking idea what for. 
He pulls you off his cock and turns you in his lap to face him. Your arms coil around his neck and you cling to him like a koala, your face buried in his chest. He holds you there, because he thinks you might need that–and also because he wants to. 
"How'd I get so lucky, huh?" he ponders as he gently strokes your hair.
"I'm lucky," you protest softly. "I was trying to tell you that last night."
"I thought you were tryin' to suck my cock."
You laugh breathlessly, unravelling yourself from him just enough to let him see your face. You curl your fingers into his hair in a possessive sort of way that would probably make him hard if he hadn't just come so thoroughly. 
"That was supposed to be an act of gratitude."
"For what? I didn't do nothin'."
He tries to keep his tone as light as yours, but his insecurities always bleed through no matter how hard he tries. You sense the earnestness in his voice, and match it head on. 
"That's not true. You've made everything better," you whisper, touching your forehead to his. "I'm so fucking happy you're in my life."
He's gonna have to ask you exactly what all went down with Heather. He figures for now it can wait. 
You kiss him and he kisses you back, his furrowed brows softening as your lips move against his in a now-familiar dance. The sun rises over Austin and though he's not sure he'll ever have the words to tell you, Joel thinks he's pretty damn happy you're in his life too.
-
"So I was thinking," you say around a mouthful of eggs the following Saturday.
"Uh-oh," Joel grins. 
You fix him with a look and his grin only widens. 
"Anyway," you continue pointedly, shovelling another forkful of eggs into your mouth. "I was thinking–I'm kind of on a roll here. You know, in terms of, like, building bridges or whatever."
"Sure," Joel nods.
"And I'm thinking that…maybe I'm ready to talk to my mom."
Joel's eyebrows shoot up his forehead. "Yeah?"
"Yeah, like…" you shrug, focusing on your breakfast as you talk out what's been on your mind since you'd seen Heather last weekend. Being with her and hearing her side of the story had given you some foundation with which to forgive her. It's been gnawing at you that you haven't really given your own mother that chance. Perhaps if she could just see how happy you are, she'd eventually come around. 
You explain all this to Joel, who nods along and hums his agreement. 
"I just feel like I've…closed myself off to her and it's not really fair for me to just expect her to magically see the light, you know? I mean, look at dad. He's been coming around more, he's been seeing us together. And he's basically okay with it all now. Maybe it's just me, you know? Maybe I need to let her in."
Joel shakes his head, smiling at you affectionately. "You're too good for your own good, you know that?"
You scoff and wave him off. 
"Whatever. But don't you agree?"
He appears to mull it over, sipping his coffee for a long moment before eventually sighing. 
"I do," he nods slowly. "But I also think…you got a right to protect your peace. Lettin' her in means exposin' yourself to all the shit that might come with that."
You bite your lip and nod. You know that. You know he's right. You know it might blow up in your face to try to repair that relationship. But some little voice in the back of your head keeps telling you to do it anyway. A cloying, aching need to just…put things back in place.
"I guess I'm just tired of feeling so angry all the time," you confess. "I'm just…walking around with all this unresolved bullshit hanging over me and it's…I mean, it's exhausting. I didn't realize how exhausted I was until I saw Heather, you know? If I potentially have the power to do something about that, then I think…I think I should."
Joel smiles, his sweet brown eyes crinkling at the edges. 
"Then I'm with you, baby," he says, reaching across the table to cover one of your hands with his own. "Whatever you gotta do."
You nod resolutely, spurred on, as ever, by his unwavering support.
-
On Sunday, it rains.
Heavy showers pelt against Joel's windshield, his truck parked in the driveway of your parents' home. A quick text to your mom the day before had confirmed she'd be home around this time and that she'd be more than okay with you stopping by for an afternoon coffee. Unlike when you'd sat outside the cafe in this same truck a week ago, you don't feel nervous to see your mother. Instead, you feel a strange sense of duty and an unflappable air of confidence. All you have to do is show off how happy Joel makes you for a couple of hours. What could possibly be easier than that? 
Plus, you're not really worried about your mother coming at you with any kind of outward disdain. She can be oddly cordial when she thinks someone is mad at her.
"I'll stay close by," Joel tells you. "Take you home when you're done."
You frown. "What? You don't have to wait for me, that's silly."
Joel just shrugs. "Ain't no thing. Don't want you takin' the bus in this weather."
And Joel thinks you're too good. 
"I wish you could just come in with me."
It had been the only stipulation your mother had outlined, or at least that's how you'd interpreted her text asking, It's just you coming, right?
You'd burned with rage at that, typed out an entire message in Joel's defense, but he had insisted it was fine. One thing at a time. He could sit this one out. 
"Next time," he murmurs, leaning across the centre console to kiss your cheek. 
"Yeah," you nod. 
He wishes you good luck, offering you a goodbye kiss before you're pulling your hood up over your head and bounding through the downpour to the front door. Your mother is pulling it open before you've even stepped onto the welcome mat. 
"Quick, quick, come on," she hastens you with a hand around your shoulders, guiding you inside and out of the pouring rain. You catch her look back at Joel pulling out of the driveway before she's closing the door behind you both. 
"Oh, shoot, look at you," she tuts, prodding at the wet fabric of your hoodie. "Let me get you something else to wear–"
"It's fine, mom," you insist before she can go pulling you something hideous from her closet. You pull your damp sweater up over your head so you're in just your t-shirt, noting that hardly any of the rainwater had managed to leak through. "This is fine, see?"
"Alright," she smiles, sort of shyly. You've been apart so long, and it normally doesn't feel so weird falling back into that mother-daughter routine. Extenuating circumstances, you suppose. She glances down at the hoodie in your arms.
"Do you want to hang it up in the bathroom and let it dry? I'll get some coffee going."
You return her smile as best you can. It certainly sounds like she's trying. It certainly sounds like something a mother would say. 
"Yeah, sure," you nod, already skirting around her to your way down the front hall. "Thanks."
You vaguely hear her hum something in response as she makes her way to the kitchen. 
The main-floor bathroom is just down the hall, a renovation project that's been half-in-the-works for years, basically abandoned now that your parents almost exclusively use their en suite. Maybe they'd have finished it by now if you still lived here.
You flip the light on to find it looks much the same as it did the last time you were here; tiles partially laid, sink without a hot water knob. You carefully drape your hoodie up on the shower curtain rod still noticeably lacking a shower curtain.
You're flattening out the sleeves when you hear the doorbell chime. 
Having grown up here, you respond instinctively to the familiar melody, poking your head out of the bathroom just in time to see your mother beat you to the door. She swings it open, and there on the front porch, soaked from his head to his shoulders, is Joel. 
Your heart just about stops.
"Oh," your mother greets him, uncertainly looking back over her shoulder to where you're standing wide-eyed in the hallway. 
"'Lo, ma'am,” Joel says. From here, you can barely hear him over the rain outside. "I don't mean to intrude. Just wanted to leave this."
You frown as he holds something out to your mother, something you can't see from this angle.  
"Oh," she says again, sounding theatrically surprised. You roll your eyes. 
"She left it in the truck. Just thought she might need it. That's all. I'll get outta your hair now."
He catches your eye over her shoulder then, quickly shooting you a sweet, heart-breaking smirk that makes your chest swell. 
"Thank you, Joel," your mother says. "I'll, uh, make sure she gets it."
He smiles at her politely and offers her a parting wave, taking off at the same time she begins to close the door after him.
"What is it? What was that?" you ask, hurriedly emerging from the hallway to meet her in the entryway. 
"Your umbrella," she tells you, hanging it up on a coat hook. "That was nice of him."
She says it absentmindedly as she makes her back to the kitchen, this time with you in tow. 
Huh.
"Well, he's a really nice man," you say simply, leaning your elbows on the island while she tends to the coffee pot. 
"Hm," she nods.
She busies herself, deep in thought in a way that makes you uneasy. 
"What?" you press her.
She pours you a mug of coffee, preparing it just how you like with cream and sugar–the same way you've taken it for years. She hands it to you over the countertop, brows still furrowed together in apparent confusion. 
"He drove you here?"
You frown. "Yes?"
"Kind of a far drive in the rain."
"So?"
She ignores you.
"What's he doing while you're here?"
You're struggling to follow her train of thought. But you think maybe you know what she's getting at. Why she can't understand Joel doing something so selfless, why she probably can't seem to understand you and Joel at all.
The thing about your mother is that there always needs to be something in it for her. Every favour, every helping hand; it can never be truly inconvenient for her, and it must always somehow benefit her in return. You know of people out there with mothers who are truly selfless, mothers who are there for them, mothers who would drop everything at a moment's notice if their children so much as asked.
But that is not your mother. That has never been your mother.
You'd forgiven her for that long ago, convinced yourself it had just made you that much more independent, that much more self-reliant. And it did, but at a cost. That cost being someone in your life you could always safely count on, someone you could always trust to be there when you needed them.
Someone who would drive you in the pouring rain to a house he could not enter, just so he could wait for you outside and bring you home when you were ready. 
"I don't know," you tell her honestly. "He just said he'd stay close by and that he'd pick me up when we're done."
She's still frowning, seemingly perplexed at the notion. "He's just waiting out there in his truck?"
You shrug. "I told you, mom. He's a really nice man."
"Hm," she says again, staring down at her coffee and taking a long, contemplative sip. "I guess he is."
You grin. It's not much. It's hardly anything at all, really. But it's a start. A seed you're more than willing to water in the hopes that eventually, maybe, she'll come around.
-
A/N CONT'D: thank you for reading! and now...a special sneak peek of the upcoming summer season. continue reading for the first 500 words of the next and final chapter of your summer dream. i love you all.
chapter vibes:
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Sometimes life really feels like a dream. 
Even in the monotony, even in the mundane. The morning commutes and the tins of cat food, the Sunday afternoons spent cleaning and the Tuesday nights spent falling asleep on the couch. And it's funny, how just like a dream, you move through the days as though time means nothing at all, everything blurring together until all at once, a year has passed. 
Summer blooms, softens and warms you from the inside out. The fan beside the bed blows cool air against your clammy skin, but is no match for the heat between your legs, the overwhelming sensation of Joel's mouth fused wetly over your cunt. 
He drinks you down like you're his morning coffee, ravenous and greedy as he hooks your legs over his shoulders and snakes his arms around your thighs. But he is in no rush, languid in the way he makes out with your pussy, whimpering and groaning at every soft, needy moan he manages to draw from you. 
But then you claw at his scalp, tug on those gorgeous greying curls and whine. Joel smirks.
"Impatient," he mutters. 
He's been lapping lazily at your cunt for the better part of twenty minutes now. You are not impatient. Luckily, as you've come to discover, Joel will never tell you no unless you ask him to. 
"S'alright," he whispers, barely letting his lips leave you as he sinks two thick fingers into your core. You keen at the welcome stretch, and Joel purrs between your thighs. "Yeah, there she is. There's my fuckin' girl. You want me to make this little pussy come? Never can just wait, can ya?"
"Waited–long enough," you groan weakly as he nudges at that perfect spot inside you. "Please. I've been good."
You feel him smile again before he's pressing a chaste little kiss to your clit, his moustache tickling your skin.
"Yeah, you have," he breathes, and then he gets to work. 
His tongue moves in tandem with his fingers, expertly finding a familiar rhythm he knows like the back of his hand by now. In no time at all, warmth pools down your spine and settles in your tummy, courses rapidly through your veins and tenses all your muscles. You come with dazzling force, grinding your clit onto his willing tongue with that insistent fist still tangled in this hair. Joel loves that. 
In these moments, the dream comes alive. The mundanity of every-day life splits open and you realize, there is in fact nothing monotonous about this life at all. How could there be? Joel is here–Joel is still here. A year since you first shook his hand in an airport parking lot, a year in which it feels as though everything changed; through it all, Joel remains. Like a tulip in soil, perennial.
"Wanna take you away somewhere," he rasps as he climbs up your body to kiss and nip at the side of your face. "What do you think? Wanna come away with me?"
You're not sure if he means forever or a day.
"Yes, please," you tell him either way. 
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juicegremlin · 3 days
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Literally sobbing my eyes out because Jean wanted Neil to stay at The Nest so. Bad. Someone barrels into his life—the "what could have been" of Jean Moreau if his mother had saved him instead of sold him—and tells Jean that he doesn't deserve to be treated this way. Jean-Yves "Starving Dog" Moreau doesn't deserve to starve, doesn't deserve to spend his whole life chasing safety and approval. For the first time in a long time, Jean has someone to protect and be protected by—a partner who won't throw him under the bus the first chance he gets. Someone to hold his fucking hand.
And then Neil leaves. Neil leaves, and Jean shatters into even more pieces than before. His partner—the one and only bright spot in Evermore's relentless sea of bad—has gone back to the Foxes, a group of people that would never treat someone the way Jean has been treated. Jean has been abandoned, yet again, by the only person capable of being there for him. Kevin got out. Neil got out. They find homes and lives and families while Jean is forced to stay and let Riko beat him into the ground, day after day after day. What makes Jean so different? So unworthy? Why can't fate hand him the same cards?
He watches Neil flourish from behind black walls, watches Kevin grow and heal and thinks why not me? And he's glad they are safe, but Jean can't help it—he wants them back. Wants someone to bear witness to his pain, even if it means putting them in danger. And is that so awful to crave? A partner in punishment? Someone to promise him hope when all he can see is black?
Kengo dies, and what little bit of hope Jean had allowed himself to cling to dies with him.
I am going to die here, Jean realizes, bleeding out onto the dormitory floor. I am finally going to die here.
When he spots Renee, he thinks he has died. Who else would come for him but an angel without wings?
But no, this is real. Jean is alive, and this is real—after years of battering, it is finally his turn to be saved, and it's all because of the Neil Josten. Jean may have been left, but he was not abandoned. He was in the back of Neil's mind the entire time. Jean watches from behind the Foxes' safety net as Neil takes Riko's resolve and dismantles it with unforgiving hands, as Neil helps return Kevin to his former glory. Watches as Neil drags Riko's life to a screeching halt. Neil cuts a deal for Jean with the Moriyamas—gives him a place outside of Evermore for the first time since Marseille—and Jean can barely breathe under the weight of himself. It's real, but it doesn't feel like it.
And then Kevin—that beautiful, unattainable piece of bitch—sends Jean to the Trojans, repayment for helping Kevin escape all those months ago. Neil takes care of the last piece of Jean's painful past, repayment for Jean's life-saving support at Evermore. And perhaps there is no real way to settle the score between the three of them, but they're free. They're safe. They're alive, and they never could have done it without each other. Maybe that's enough for now.
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Harvey's photoshoot with Mike Ruiz for Photobook Magazine has been published, along with a short interview covering his career and ambitions! Read a few of his responses below:
You have become somewhat of a trailblazer for what is possible for queer, Latinx actors. Who are your biggest role models and inspirations when it comes to performing? My on-screen role models were pretty limited. I found inspiration in watching Cantinflas, a Latino comedian, with my dad. Watching people like Salma Hayek and Antonio Banderas represent Latinos on the big screen helped keep me hopeful. I’m happy to report that I’ve worked with both of them. From “What We Do in the Shadows,” to “The Magicians,” there is a slight recurring theme of supernatural or fantasy. What draws you to these types of projects and roles? In both 'The Magicians' and 'Shadows,' anything is possible. I love the idea that there are no limitations on where our characters can go, so I’ve always been drawn to that. I was never specifically seeking to be in these particular genres, but I’m so happy to be a part of them. In addition to on the screen, you have an extensive portfolio of voice acting credits. How does working behind a microphone compare to working on the camera? Doing voice-over has been such a wonderful experience. I didn’t really start doing V.O. work until the pandemic. It’s a tough door to get through. The pandemic brought these opportunities to me. It was the only work that I was able to do safely at the time. Since then, my portfolio has doubled in voice-over work. All the characters I get to play are so different from each other. I get so excited when people come up to me and mention they're fans of a character I voice. Either voice acting, on camera, or on the stage, are there any dream roles you would love to play? As a musical theatre kid, I’d obviously love to do Broadway. I’d also really love to host SNL one day. In addition to acting, you're also involved in advocacy work, particularly in the LGBTQ+ field. What inspires you to use your voice and platform for good? I try to use my platform to help anyone that I can, especially those in the LGBTQ+ and Latino community. For so long, I didn’t see anyone advocating for someone like me so I do the best I can to amplify their voices while bringing awareness to those communities. With “What We Do in the Shadows” heading into its sixth and final season, what’s next for you? Anything fans should look forward to? We’re about to wrap in two weeks from the time this interview is published. That being said, it’s bittersweet. We recently said goodbye to our exterior set, and it was really emotional. I committed to this character for half a decade, which is no small task. It’s become such a big part of my life, and I’m thankful for all the lives we’ve touched through comedy. Season 6 will air later this year. I’ll have projects like “Companion” and “Garfield” out this year as well as a couple others. I’m excited to see what’s next!
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bethelighthalazia · 3 days
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Family Vacation
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Summary:  You, your daughter and your husband spend the first day of a week's vacation together with the other members of ateez at a zoo.
Genre: fluff
Pairing: husband!wooyoung x fem!pregnant!reader
Word Count:  1636
Warnings: none?
networks: @newworldnet
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© by bethelighthalazia. Do not repost, copy or translate. Unless stated otherwise, those works are mine and born from my own ideas. I don't have any claim on the mentioned real existing Idols whatsoever.
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The well deserved and highly anticipated group-vacation of one week was finally here. This time, Wooyoung and the other members had decided to spend the time in a somewhat secluded spot near the mountains. Hongjoong and Seonghwa had planned a surprise for Wooyoung, especially since he hadn't had much time to be around his family. 
You and Nabi, your and Wooyoung's three years old daughter, were waiting on the porch of the vacation home for the boys to arrive. When Nabi heard the laughter of her father, she couldn't contain her joy and jumped off the porch to run towards the men, giggling happily and calling for her daddy.
“Nabi! What are you doing here, my little butterfly?” Wooyoung asked when picking her up, a bright smile on his lips, looking around. “Eomma and I waited for appa! You bring all the samchons too!” She squeals with joy, already leaning towards her favorite uncle who quickly picked her out of Wooyoung´s arms. It didn't take long for Wooyoung to spot you on the porch, his gaze softening as he hurried over to you to help you up. “Careful, Jagi,” He hummed, pulling you into a gentle hug, making sure to not accidentally push too hard against your belly while doing so. “Please tell me that you didn't come here all alone with Nabi. You were careful and had someone help, right?”
“Wooyoung, baby. I am pregnant, not sick.” You chuckled, cupping his cheek before placing a kiss to his lips. He couldn't hide a little laugh, but then got cut by a loud squeak coming from your daughter. Both of you were quick to turn around, already panicked, but when you see Yunho holding Nabi and twirling around with her, you let out a relieved sigh. Wooyoung however was not as relaxed at this sight. 
“Yah, Yunho hyung! Be careful with her!” He shouted and with a roll of his eyes, Yunho let San take her from him. Nabi´s arms immediately wrapped around her favorite uncle´s arms, giggling and kicking her little feet, which sent one of her slippers flying right against the back of Hongjoong´s head. Wooyoung´s cackle startled you a bit, it is quite loud right next to your ear, yet you soon join in when you see the expression on Hongjoong's face, who seems to be indecisive between being angry or amused. Your daughter quickly hid her face behind her hands, giggling with joy. 
She's probably one of the most spoiled children in Korea, especially with Wooyoung as her dad and seven wonderful uncles, who would give her the world. Shaking his head, Wooyoung wrapped his arm around you to lead you over to the porch to sit down again, handling you with such love and care, as if he fears you could break in his hands. Admittedly, handling a three year old while being six months pregnant is a whole lot of work, but Wooyoung´s family always supported you and helped you wherever they could. 
“How are you, jagi? Has Nabi been very difficult?” Wooyoung asked quietly, sitting next to you to watch your daughter playing with the other members. Nabi´s giggles and happy squeaks reach your ears and you lean your head on his shoulder, his hand gently resting on your belly. “After this vacation, I´ll be home more, I promise.” And you knew that he meant this. Wooyoung always made sure to spend any free minute with you and Nabi, and if it was to just play with her, so you could rest. “Don´t worry, Woo. Nabi is not as bad as dealing with you, you know?” You chuckled, kissing him before he could protest.
“Eomma! Appa! Look, Joonie samchon made me a music again!” Your daughter squeaked as she came running to you and your husband, waving around her ipod that the guys gave her once and which Hongjoong constantly filled with new music for her; of course all of it child friendly and approved by you and Wooyoung. “And Jongi samchon singed!” “I can sing for you too, Nabi,” Mingi then laughed, but a pout replaced his smile when your daughter shook her head, her black locks swinging around. “Noo! Min samchon sounds scary when he makes his speakmusic.”
Her words let all the others burst out in laughter, even Mingi soon joined in. Yes, his rap probably can sound a bit scary for a child. “But he also can sing prettily, little butterfly.” Yunho chuckled, ruffling her hair with a happy smile while looking at you to check if you agree with it. “I´ll show you his music that's not scary, okay?” 
When Nabi nodded and then as she ran around on the gravelly path towards the house, she tripped and fell, staying in that position for a moment as if waiting for something, but before anyone could say anything, your daughter gets up, brushes the dirt off her legs and then smiles at San. “Look Sanie samchon! No ouchies. I'm a fighter like you!” She giggled, lifting her hands to show that she's not hurt, causing you to let out a breath of relief. In the beginning when she was even younger, Wooyoung would have jumped up and checked on her at the slightest bump, but by now, both of you were a little more relaxed in this.
“A fighter? I thought you're a princess, little sunshine?” Seonghwa chuckled, to which Nabi put her fists on her waist, pouting a little. “Princesses can fight too! Sanie samchon says that!” Your daughter spends so much time with all of the boys when they have time, she's been raised to be a very independent, yet loving and strong girl. “Ah, that's true. I forgot that. Did you know your Mingi samchon is a princess too?” The oldest of the boys asked with a grin, making your daughter giggle and run over to you, where she gets her princess crown out of her little bag so she could hand it to Mingi to put on.
“Yah, no one's allowed to look cuter or prettier than Nabi or y/n!” With a laugh, Wooyoung wrapped an arm around you, kissing your cheek gently, he's just relieved to be able to spend the next week with you, their daughter and his friends. Wooyoung loves you and wants to show you that, and unbeknownst to you, he's cleared at least two weeks around your due date in three months, just so he won't be missing the birth of your second baby. “Now let's unpack and then enjoy our vacation, alright? And don't you all dare to bother my pregnant wife to cook or anything!” He added, glaring at his members, who just rolled their eyes at these words. None of them were ever a bother for you, they usually just take over your tasks, so you could rest, which they do throughout this whole vacation as well. 
After Wooyoung and you had unpacked your things, Nabi had been with San the whole time, you all meet in the living area of the vacation home, where you see your three year old argue with Mingi about what you all will do first. He wants to visit the hot springs, Nabi however would like to go to the little zoo she saw on the way here. The final decision would be made by a game of rock paper scissors, which Mingi won, but your daughter truly had all the boys wrapped around her little finger. With a pout and some tears, the child quickly changed Mingi´s mind, which caused the other boys to laugh.
An hour later, the ten of you were walking down a small path, cherry blossoms around you and the sounds of various animals surrounding you all. Your daughter was switching between the other members to hold their hands while walking, your own hand constantly in the soft hold of Wooyoung's hand, fingers entwined. The giggles of your daughter only bring smiles to your faces, a chuckle escaping you, when Nabi drags Jongho after her to show him the red pandas in their enclosure. “Be careful, Nabi! Make sure to watch over Jongho, yes?” You called after her with a little laugh, amused by her enthusiasm, while walking over to a bench to sit down for a bit. “Hey, are you feeling well, y/n?” Seonghwa asked, when he followed you and Wooyoung to the bench, a small frown on his face in concern. “Yes, don´t worry please. I just didn't sleep a lot last night. A little rascal wanted to cuddle with me and snored a lot.” You chuckled, leaning back against the backrest and stretched your legs. 
Seonghwa just nodded and then went with Hongjoong to find something to purchase some bottles of water and some snacks, since you all forgot to get them before coming here. Wooyoung and you kept watching your daughter with Jongho, Yeosang, San, Mingi and Yunho, a content smile on your faces. Nabi is really just a mini copy of your husband Wooyoung, even their laughter is similar, but hers is more adorable and giggly than his. 
The day at the zoo kept being eventful and eventually, Nabi fell asleep being rocked in San´s arms while he carried her back to the car. Since you all ate dinner there, you decided to let her sleep on the way back to the vacation home, where San put Nabi to bed and you and Wooyoung cuddled up on the sofa, where both of you fell asleep soon as well. The others decided to not disturb the two of you and since the sofa was big enough to be comfortable, they placed a blanket over you before then heading to their own rooms, all of them too exhausted to do anything before going to bed as well. 
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taglist: @mingis-mizu, @tinyelfperson, @hotteokkay, @minkilicious, @bunnliix, @gong-fourz, @yeosangiess, @jayshoneybee, @dinossaurz, @scuzmunkie
(if you want to be added to a taglist, follow the taglist-link in my pinned post)
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poohbea · 16 hours
Text
After a long day, Sukuna finds you on the bed reading, in nothing but your panties on. Whether you intend to be or not, you’re a fucking temptation, the walking drug to his never ending addiction.
Your laughter sounds when he lays kisses upon your face, your lips — soft and sweet — your neck, lower, lower, till he finds solace between your thighs. His breath is steady, hot against your clothed cunt.
“My perfect girl.” He exhales, tongue laving a pressured strip over the cotton, spit soaking though it just as your arousal does the longer he teases you. With your hips unable to keep still, and those thighs of yours threatening to close, he takes it as his cue to tear the troublesome barrier right through the middle. You gasp at the sound of ripping fabric, book now long forgotten in the ruffled bedsheets at your side. “Mine.” His growl is low, but given the silence blanketing the room it’s audible enough for you to let out a whine-filled sigh, one that carries your pleas, your desire, your longing. All of it in one simple breath.
When his lips finally envelop your aching clit the scene that unfolds is much like the picture you'd sent him earlier in the day. Your back arched prettily as his tongue dips between your folds and past your entrance. Your taste flooding his senses almost entirely, and he'd have it no other way. Your head lolls back, mouth agape in a broken moan and he draws you closer — impossibly so — holding your thighs apart, pinning them to your chest while he devours you as if he'd been starving himself for weeks.
“That's right, princess. Fuck my tongue, let me hear how good you feel.” The glow of his eyes illuminates the softness of your skin — already moulded perfectly in his hands — a tell tale sign of exactly what it is you do to him. You drive him mad. Always leading him here, on his knees, ready to witness the syllables of his name falling from your lips.
“Kuna!” You moan, hands cupping your tits as you fail to squirm in his grasp. “Kuna!” There it is again, breathier, more high pitched. It precedes the gradual tightening of your walls, his fingers replacing his tongue, pads of the index and middle finding that perfect spot that has your own digits carding through his hair. “Sukuna!” There it is. That scream of ecstasy. The pulsing of your cunt around his fingers. A drug that overtakes him entirely.
He's rooted to that place between your thighs, tongue lapping at your clit as you come down in an array of staggered breaths. “Good girl. Good. Fucking. Girl.” He groans, contently driving you into overstimulation, ensuring that you continue to look like that picture. Or perhaps, he'll make you cum over and over and over again till you've got no choice but to stay like that for the remainder of his time with your perfect cunt.
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cordeliawhohung · 2 days
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Hey, hi, hello!
So hear me out...
Pornstar! Gaz who's director decides it's the reader's turn to top Gaz because that's what the porn industry has been turning towards. Gaz is a little skeptical because how can his sweet girl do anything but be pliant for him? But he goes along with it anyways.
Flash forward and his body is shaking, eyes rolled back as he desperately fists the sheets until his knuckles turn pale. Reader is a better top than he thought she would be! Poor boyo is so overstimulated that he's a whimpering, crying mess and reader is just riding him without a care in the world, maybe thinking about giving him a lil prostate torture while she's at it. <3
Anyways, that's all I have. Good day.
ps!gaz masterlist [unedited because i'm tired just enjoy the horny thots]
"Beg."
All Kyle sees when his pretty brown eyes flutter open is your grin. Usually he thinks your smile is cute, but right now the only word that pops into his mind when he sees it is devilish. He would hate to admit that he underestimated your abilities when the director said you were supposed to be dominant that day, but he certainly never expected this.
Your sweet cunt sucked him in the moment you lowered yourself onto him, and you refused to let him do any of the work. Pawing his hands away from you like he was nothing more than an annoying cat, you bounced on his cock like you owned it. Owned him. Fuck, you brought him so close to heaven that he had completely forgotten the two of you were filming until he saw someone shuffling in the corner of his eye.
But now, as he lays there and stares up at you, his mind is blank. Up until now, you hadn't really spoken much. Just took the lead and rendered him a writhing, sweaty mess underneath you. It didn't help that you had stopped right as he felt he was about to come. It renders his brain completely fried. His brows pinch together as he attempts to catch his breath.
"Huh?" he pants.
Your grin only grows wider at his cute confusion, and you slowly roll your hips back and forth. It's a painful dance, the way your walls clench around him. It only leaves him wanting more, and yet instead of asking, the only thing his body is capable of giving you is a strained groan and his eyes rolling into the back of his head.
"I said beg," you repeat.
It's clear with his heaving chest and fluttering eyes that Kyle's completely useless. You've never seen him so fucked out before, and it's a masterpiece that you know you won't forget anytime soon. Still, the film is running, so you take your hands and gently slide up along his feverish skin. Goosebumps rise along his chest in wake of your fingers as your hands cup either side of his head, forcing his full attention on you (as if he could put it anywhere else).
"Do you think I let just anyone come in this pussy?" you ask. You lean forward to press a chaste kiss against the corner of his mouth before nuzzling your nose into his cheek. "No, only good boys get to do that. And do you know what good boys do? They beg."
Kyle's mind finally makes sense of what you're asking of him, and you feel his cock twitch inside of you as he groans. Every muscle in his body contracts as he attempts to hold himself back, to keep himself from seeming pathetic, but you've brought him so close to the edge, tortured him for so long he's not sure he cares anymore.
"Please, doll," he says in a whisper. Your lips are so close together that you can almost feel the way the words form on his mouth.
"Can't hear you," you goad.
"Please," he tries again. "Fuck, thank you f-for makin' me feel so good. I just- please, I need more. Just a little more, please doll, I'll be good I swear- fuck."
Your chuckling cuts him off as you push yourself back. The view of the muscles tensing in his neck as he looks at you through heavy lids is nearly enough to make you fold.
"Look at you," you croon. "So lovely for me, aren't you?"
There's no time for him to respond before you're back to riding him, hips slamming against his with such fervor it steals his breath away. Kyle's head wrenches back into the mattress as his fingers nearly tear holes in the sheets. The only thing he can mutter between breaths is the phrase thank you over and over and over again.
"Good boy."
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avocado-writing · 3 days
Note
Hey there I hope you’re having a wonderful day, could I make a request for bg3? I’d like to request the crew with a noble barbarian tav, kind of like Godfrey from Elden ring. Normally they are very regal, eloquent, and in control, they might even think they are some knight until they finally let loose. Whether it’s their s/o in danger or a challenging battle, they just go to town, very ‘I have give thee courtesy enough!’.
oh anon, you're very kind to think that I'm a competent enough gamer to have played elden ring. writing these scenarios as if they're seeing you go into a rage for the first time!
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Astarion
Very much an 'oh. oh! oh...' moment for him.
Doesn't want to confess that he's attracted to the way you go feral, but anyone looking at him during battle will see how he is affected.
He already thought you were charming with your eloquence and courtly mannerisms, but this drives him wild. The idea you had this potential thrumming through your veins this whole time is delicious.
He can smell the blood pumping through your veins as you rage and does something for him. If you're together, expect a visit from him that night.
Gale
Loves to engage you in long, thoughtful conversations over tea every night. Did not expect this side to you.
At first he thinks some untowards magic has been cast on you, but then he sees how in control you are even when you're letting loose.
Is flustered and flattered when you make sure he's safe in battle, using your rage to protect his body with yours.
Afterwards when you check he's okay he has to try and hide how much he's blushing as he stammers out an affirmative. Asks you lots of questions about the nature of your rage. Can't stop staring at you when you're in battle...
Wyll
Lets out a little "oh, my!" when you first rage in front of him.
A bit gobsmacked but jumps back into action, quickly helping you fend off whatever enemies have caused your ire.
Is over it remarkably quickly, and takes it in his stride - in camp the two of you discuss court and your respective times in it, laughing at tales of long gone social faux-pas...
And on the battlefield you are a machine cutting down everything in your wake as he uses finesse to dispatch your foes. He thinks you are night and day... but that you are wonderful.
Karlach
Sees you rage for the first time and she lets out a "FUCK YEAH!"
Drops into a rage by your side and the two of you absolutely decimate the battlefield. The gang of mercenaries who came for you never knew what hit them.
After you wipe your brow with an embroidered handkerchief from your pocket and offer her a spare, which she takes and uses (completely destroying it in the process with soot from her engine)
Geeks out with you every day about raging. The two of you discuss battle tecniques and play-wrestle, which more often than not brings down half the camp. She loves it. She thinks you're perfect.
Lae'zel
Never really gave you the time of day before now. She found your elegant manner irritating. Why use honeyed words when you can cut straight to the point?
But then, oh, she sees you rage, and she is enamoured.
That night demands that you tell her why you never said that you could fight like that. You have an argument saying you never felt the need to... it goes on until the two of you calm down and end up sitting well into the night discussing how you grew up as warriors.
She has a respect for you from then on, confident you can look after yourself on the battlefield. More often than not she watches you fight with an appreciative eye.
Shadowheart
Oh, she's thrilled. We know she likes barbarians anyway (see her thirsty dialogue about Karlach) so when you rage in front of her?
She just stares for a bit. It's all she's able to do.
When that staring leaves her vulnerable to attack and you come and defend her, oh, she's gone. She has such a crush on you. If she had one before, it's doubled.
You're always the first one she comes to check on after battle. She likes to lay her hands on your bicep as she's healing you, perhaps feeling the muscle a bit more than is necessary. Her cheeks are always bright pink.
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Sup, can i ask for a request headcanons for Idia with an S/O who's similar to Meg from Hercules? Basically free-spirited, independent, quick-witted, and snarky, who would do everything for her lovely boyfriend even going as far as to protect him from any bullies and such.
Idia Shroud:
You are mildly intimidating to him. While your personality is one he finds attractive, he still can’t help but pause when he thinks about talking to you or interacting in any way that might have your full attention on him. He has seen the carnage from your snark, the way you could make even the most confident man crumble if they proved themselves a fool, and he doesn’t want Ortho to have to scoop up his remains if he failed his charisma check.
Now after you’re together is a different story. He’s still in awe of your quick-witted abilities but even moreso when it’s used to protect him. He won’t claim he needed the protecting, or that most people even bothered him as he knew he was far smarter than they could ever dream of being, but it was satisfying to see them get humbled so quickly. It does stress him out when it draws even more attention to the conversation, especially if it escalates beyond a few snarky remarks tossed back and forth, and he’s quick to pull you away before things go too far.
Whenever he thinks about you he feels like he’s head over heels, even after dating for a day. It’s like working through all the side routes in an otome game to finally reach the main love interest, the true end, the place the story had been leading to all along. He had waited for you for a long time, and gone through many heart-wrenching moments, but it finally felt like his life was coming together exactly the way it should.
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fawnindawn · 23 hours
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the line between them (Luke Castellan x apollo fem! reader)
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Summary: Luke Castellan returns from his quest as a ghost of his old self with a bleeding scar to prove it. With his golden boy exterior all but shattered, no one in camp has tried to approach him since his return. This changes when you stumble upon the son of Hermes when he decides to go back to his old roots, stealing from your infirmary at midnight.
pairing: luke castellan x apollo fem! reader
Content: forced proximity, tending to wounds, How Luke and Sunshine have their first meet-cute, mentions of injuries and scars, Luke tries and fails at being mean, hurt-comfort, fluff
masterlist for this series (everything in between) every part in this series can be read as a stand alone!
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"Come on." One of the campers prodded despite your obvious discomfort. "I'm sure you've squeezed something out of Castellan by now. He's been silent about what happened during his quest for days."
"I told you, I don't know anything, and even if I did, patient confidentiality exists." You repeated for the ninth time in a week. Ever since people found out Luke had come personally to you to tend to his wounds, they have lost all decency over the hope of digging for some good gossip. If you were asked one more time, you were sure you would tell them to stick their noses right back up their asses and leave.
Even after his return, Luke Castellan remained a constant in word of mouth around camp over his sudden change in persona. His usual grin and charm was replaced with a dark gloom unfitting for the son of Hermes, who used to light up whatever room he was in. The scar that permanently rested on his face didn't make it easier for him to avoid watching eyes either. After refusing to play in Capture the Flag for the first time in history, whatever patience the camp was trying to uphold dissipated into chaos.
Sure, you could see why it was a big deal. If you're a person with a sane enough mind (of course, not guaranteed in the premises of Camp Half-Blood), you could see why the fellow camp counsellor of the Hermes Cabin was popular. With his constant presence around camp as the cool, attractive camp counsellor helping other campers with that small quirk up his lips, or through word of mouth of how talented and kind he was, it wasn't a huge surprise that he attracted as much attention as he did.
Once the ninth camper in a row finally gave up and left with a huff, your eyes lingered over the bed where you first tended to Luke.
It was the dead of night when you were woken by the sound of creaking wooden floorboards and the cold chill of the wind that had somehow been brought into the infirmary. Somehow, you had overslept again on your shift and no one had bothered to wake you up or even check for your missing presence in your cabin.
Groaning at the awkward shift of your bones from your horrible sleeping posture on the desk, you were halfway through your stretch to crack your stiff neck when you heard the sound of footsteps. Freezing in place, you paused to listen in once more only to heard the soft thud once again. Peering to the left side of the infirmary, your heart stopped.
"Hey, listen." You spoke with that awkward crack in your voice whenever you go too long without speaking, causing the large shadow to flinch, pausing in its pursuit through your medicine cabinet. "I may not seem like it, but I am the best in combat in my cabin so whoever you are, step away from the cabinet and put your hands up."
Gee, that's convincing, you sound like an unnamed extra from the first few minutes of a horror movie before they ended up six feet under. Cursing yourself internally, you watched the shadow raise to full height from it's bent position. Gulping at the height that seemed to be at least six feet, you wonder if you should have just left this cabinet thief be and go to sleep for the night.
Why would anyone even want to ransack an infirmary at midnight?
You quickly grabbed for your oil lamp situated beside you, still flickering with the smallest of flames and you stood from your chair, causing it to creak back and scratch at the wooden floors as you made your way around the table to approach the thief.
The light was dim, but you spotted the familiar outline of a broad back and curls before he even fully turned.
"Castellan?" You gasped in half-asleep shock, disbelief obvious in your tone as you moved the oil lamp nearer to prove your eyesight wasn't playing tricks on you.
He didn't respond to the call of his name, but his eyes narrowed on you as if you were the intruder. You barely had the chance to form words, questions- before you spotted the dripping crimson liquid near his eye.
"Oh gods." You muttered, grabbing at his arm and tugging him towards the nearest bed. "Why didn't you wake me up? It's not like you could wrap this up yourself."
With some struggle, he finally gave in, plopping down the edge of the bed and watched you scour through the medicine cabinet for bandages and other supplies, muted and stiff.
"I seriously don't understand why you didn't wake me up. Would you rather bleed to death or get an infection?" You scolded, your inner concern bleeding through your usual sense of politeness for injured visitors.
"Maybe." You thought you heard him mumble, but when you turned to look at him, he was facing the window right beside the bed and staring out into the shadows of the forest, the glow of the moonlight illuminating his features like a haunted painting, blood dripping down his cheekbones like fallen tears. You waited longer for an elaboration but there was none. You assumed you heard wrong, or at least you hoped you did.
You got off your knees, splaying out the supplies on the surface of the bed beside him, and pulled up a stool for you to sit at. He was still facing away from you, and your irritation combined with your lack of sleep made you more reckless than you'd usually be with an injured patient.
You gripped at his chin, forcing him to look at you, watching with satisfaction as his eyes widened at the sudden force. He looked more alive when he was caught off guard, his face devoid of the usual disinterest and distance it had ever since he arrived back from his quest.
"How do you expect me to treat you if you keep looking away from me, Castellan?" You challenged, gazing back into his eyes with fire you hoped was fierce enough to break down the coldness in his gaze.
After seconds of nothing but two stubbornheads trying to win a useless battle of eye contact, he sighed. "..Fine."
You were more gentle after that, your hands delicate on his skin that seemed to have pulled at the edge of the scar, where it was now bleeding again through the stitches. You mumbled apologies before dapping a wet handkerchief on the wound to wipe away the blood, and you noted how he gripped at the sheets as he tried not to hiss out in pain.
After the cut had stopped bleeding, you were quick to grab the gauze and bandages. Tenderly, you placed the gauze above his wound, then wrapped the bandages around his face, from the top of his head to below his chin. This was the closest you had ever been to him, and you could feel and hear both his and your breathing in the quiet silence of the infirmary, with no living signs of life aside from the two of you on the infirmary bed and the dim orange hue of the oil lamp.
You could feel his intense gaze on you from his one good eye, that stared at your face while you concentrated on tying a secure knot so it wouldn't fall loose. The moment felt oddly intimate, knowing how sensitive his temper had been ever since he arrived back at camp, scarred in ways not even ambrosia could heal fully.
"Next time.." You hinted, hopefully not crossing his boundaries. "If this happens again, you come straight here, got it? I don't care if I'm sleeping or attending someone else. You are not allowed to take care of a wound like this yourself, especially since I remember how reckless you can be."
Luke Castellan may be an excellent swordsman, but his cockiness was one weakness that he failed to keep controlled, and on days where it won over, he would always end up at the infirmary with a bashful smile as he tried to explain to you on how he ended up with a dislocated shoulder. That felt like eons ago, when that cheeky smile would always be present on his face, his signature move in getting away with any chaos he caused.
Staring at him now, you caught sight of that smile for such a split second you could've sworn you mistook it.
You couldn't stop the teasing smile that slipped past your stern attitude. "Was that a smile I saw, Castellan?"
He cleared his throat, his face falling back into practiced nonchalance, wearing a frown too forced to be real. "I don't know what you're talking about."
"I may be sleep-deprived because a certain someone decided midnight was the best time to ransack an infirmary, but I'm not blind. For making me work overtime, I at least deserve to know what you found so amusing."
He made a face, and you were sure if his face wasn't tightly bandaged, he would roll his eyes in exasperation. "I wasn't amused. Just don't remember you being this.. unhospitable with someone that's injured. And I am not reckless."
You scoffed, causing him to look over at you. "I'd say trying to steal from an infirmary is pretty reckless. I thought Hermes kids were supposed to be good in stealing?"
You realised all too late that you may have touched on a sensitive topic, with the mention of his father, but he didn't seem to notice over the frank insult of being called a bad thief.
"I am good in stealing." He bit back so quickly, you choked on a snort. Hermes kids and their egos. "I was just going easy on you because you were knocked out at your desk. Oh, and you snore, you know that?"
"I do not!"
"Do too."
"You're a liar and a thief. Don't know why your reputation is as marvelled upon as it is, Castellan. You don't live up to the hype at all."
"Oh, and what about you, Miss Sunshine?" He retorted. "Aren't you suppose to be the famous sweetheart who sings all injuries away with a smile on your face?"
"Don't call me that ever again." You must have looked extremely repulsed because he let out a laugh so genuine, it wiped any disgust off your face at the sound of pure heaven flooding into your ears. God, you forgot he could laugh like that.
"Yeah, I suppose it doesn't suit you, does it?" He murmured. "Maybe Apollo kids are only nice when others are around to see it."
"You've only come back meaner, Castellan." You scoffed. "I almost regret helping you. Would much rather see you stumble over trying to deal with this yourself if I knew you'd be so ungrateful."
"Sounds righteous of you." He nodded with a sarcastic hum. "Leaving me to bleed out to death while you watch. I understand why the camp has such high stakes when it comes to survival now. Never knew there was a sadist hiding in you, sunshine."
"I told you not to call me that." You reminded. "And I'm doing the best I can to keep everyone here alive so don't come to my infirmary talking about stakes when I've just saved your ass from blood loss."
Your response triggered something in him and he grew silent, his gaze locked on you as if analyzing you. That was when you're really reminded of how awful you must've looked. With your bed hair, sunken-in dark circles and sunken shoulders from the lack of sleep, you did not exactly feel the most confident. You didn't know what happened to make the casual atmosphere disappear as fast as it did, but you were anxious that somehow, you had shut him up again and you'd never get the chance to see him that way again, with his playful banter and light-heartedness of a teenage boy that he should have.
"You shouldn't have to." He muttered, almost to himself rather than to you. A seriousness unlike the previous few quips he'd thrown at you took ahold of him, and you had a feeling this was a slither of who he had really become through his rapid transformation, hidden under the jokes and sarcasm.
"What?"
"You shouldn't have to." He repeated, louder this time for you to hear, trying to get you to see his point. A point he'd been trying to tell Chiron, his friends even- ever since he came back here, only to be meet with pitying looks like he was a madman who spoke nonsense to try and make sense of his failure. "Lives should not be your responsibility. You're younger than me, and yet, you're dealing with kids that are near death's door every time they make it past that barrier. I barely made it back here. Some don't even.."
Luke tried to breathe, remembering how he got to camp in the first place. The unnecessary sacrifice that had to be made, the tree that now rests at the barrier of camp, the sound of thunder and pouring rain beating at his face.
"Now, I'm stuck with this disgusting scar of my face for the rest of my life, a reminder every single time I look at myself, that I failed my only chance at proving I was something more than another wasted potential, left to rot in this camp just because I couldn't-" He winced suddenly, grabbing onto the bandaged part of his face that seemed to grow more irritated and flamed the more his anger poured out of his chest.
You were quick to reach for his hand, knowing his aggression may harm the wound more. "It is not disgusting." You answered for him, and slowly, your hand rested over his, removing it from his face so he wouldn't accidentally cause the wound to start bleeding again. "You are not a failure, Luke."
"Don't take pity on me by saying words you don't mean." He muttered. "Everyone expected more of me, I could feel it in their gaze when they looked at me. I was supposed to be the best, and just because everyone told me that, I believed it. Then, I went off running like a coward for the real thing, unprepared and useless. Like a real disappointment."
His eyes were glazed over, and his shoulders dropped as he admitted his true thoughts out loud to you. Maybe because you were the only person to treat him normally in the past two weeks, to really listen instead of trying to get him to move on, and maybe because his heart felt like it was growing too heavy to carry on his own. The insecurity and vulnerability made him feel sick, and he found himself trying to tear his hands away from you out of the need to run, which only made him feel more disgusted with himself. Like a coward, his mind taunted.
You remained stubborn, holding onto his cold palms because you know he has had no warmth, no real genuine words spoken to him since he returned. No one to see him when it was clear he was suffering, that he needed all the time in the world and more to heal, and that he deserved more than self-loathing and an absent father who sentenced him to this fate.
"I am not pitying you." You insisted, and you leaned closer so he couldn't look away from you. "Your scar does not make you ugly or less valuable to anyone. It is not pity, it is a fact. You are a person who has survived a fate so close to death, and any feat to survive death is strength. You are strong, and you made it back here alive with a scar to prove it. It is not a sign of weakness."
"Anyone who tells you different has no right or say in your situation because they did not go through what you did." You said with a stern voice, your anger not towards him, but for him. "Not your father, not anyone."
Luke finally looked at you, like looked. His eyes were scanning all over your face as if not quite believing you were real, but the fire in your eyes was so magnetic, he couldn't look away. The pinch between your brows, the addictive warmth of your hands in his, and the close distance between the two of you, and yet, it didn't make his skin itch with the need to pull away. To hide in his corner and wallow over the heavy weight of knowing his world had ended in the Garden of the Hesperides. Or had it?
Your eyes looked right through him, and for once, he felt like there was someone there for him.
"I suppose I can see where your reputation comes from now, sunshine." He responded weakly, and his heart gave a thump when you smiled back at him.
"Healing's what I understand best." You shrugged casually, as if you didn't just silence his thoughts for a moment of peace, or that you have somehow dulled the internal blades that bled with self-hatred and world-consuming anger pointed at himself, and at the injustice of the gods who could not give a damn about their children. “If I can help you even a little, why shouldn’t I?”
He could feel time ticking again in the back of his mind, the night slowly passing into a new one, and he thinks as he holds your gaze, that maybe this world wouldn't be so painful to live in if he had someone to look at him the way you did.
"I don't know how I'm going to go back to normal. Or if I'll ever be normal again." He admitted, softer in his voice now that his mind didn't deem you as a threat.
"Normal can be lots of things." You said with a comforting smile. "It's normal to have a breakdown when you've nearly faced death. Multiple even. It's normal to feel fine one moment then not in the next. Healing isn't linear, and when you come to terms that you have a right to feel upset and a right to exist without being held to any expectations of others or what you think others want from you, it'll feel easier to just allow yourself to exist throughout the day. Not the perfect camp counsellor or a hero with no faults. Just as yourself."
He let your words sink in, his thumbs subconsciously rubbing over your knuckles, feeling the healed scars of your own from what he assumed must be from previous combat training. "I'm not that great as myself. You might find me disappointing."
You quirked your lips at that, and shook your head. "I don't believe in that one bit. You're already great just as you are now."
He raised a brow. "Even after trying to steal from your infirmary and having a mental breakdown past curfew?"
"Well, just be glad I was around because I'm much more understanding than Will would be with four hours of sleep."
"I am glad." He insisted. "That it's you."
"I'm glad it was me too." You reassured. "It is midnight though and there's Capture the Flag tomorrow, meaning someone's going to end up whining and moping in here in about eight hours so why don't you let me close shop and come by tomorrow, Castellan?"
"Luke." He corrected, giving you a smile you're sure must be the one the other campers rave about all the time. The charming one that made your heart stutter, even with half his face bandaged and eyebags resting below his caramel eyes.
"Luke." You tested it on your tongue tentatively, and he rewarded you with the cutest grin you've ever seen in your life. Curse crushes and the effect it has on your life expectancy. "I have to close this place up or someone else might try and steal from the medicine cabinet, not that I thought it was possible before but.."
"Fine." He complied, getting off the bed and rising to his full height, towering over you and blocking the moonlight from your view. "I'll wait outside and walk you back to your cabin. It's the least I could do."
"Sure you're not just trying to improve your image around me, thief?"
He smirked, following you out to the front door while you wrestled for the keys in your pocket to lock up for the night. "I have no idea what you're talking about."
"What are you smiling about?"
You looked up from your daze to see Luke leaning over the door frame, watching you with a smirk over his face.
"Can't a girl smile just for the sake of it?" You bit back, cheeks flushing at the idea that he could've possibly seen your focus lingering a little too long on the bed he had sat on. "Why'd you drop out of Capture the Flag? You know your cabin's going to lose their streak to Ares at this point."
"Wanted to see someone." He replied with a shrug, pushing off the door frame to walk towards where you sat, leaning over your desk and watching you compile the latest stock of ambrosia into a box. "Plus, Athena and Hermes are joining for today so Annabeth's got it handled."
He shuffled his fingers along the edge of the table, outlining the curve before clearing his throat. "I heard you covering up for me just now, and I wanted to say thank you."
You looked up at him, admiring the warmth in his eyes that you never got to appreciate in the dead of night. "Eavesdropping on me now? Careful or you might end up becoming obsessed with a poor, overworked healer."
He scoffed exaggeratedly, going over to mess with your hair in return. "You wish. Just take the thank you. Should've known not to show my gratitude to an Apollo kid."
You stuck your tongue out at him before going on about how mind-blowing it can be that some kids really did not have emotional intelligence when it came to basic decency. Listening to you ramble on as you went on to arrange your first aid kits, Luke realised for all the disappointment he has experienced in his life, maybe there was one good thing his father led him to.
a/n: Couldn't resist writing how this duo met because I live and die for banter. inspired by 'my reputation's never been worse so you must like me for me' trope which is what i live and breathe for. His reputation as the perfect golden boy is in shambles, and sunshine couldn't care less.
taglist: @stars4birdie @elysiandumbash @kehlanislefttoe @mqg125 @madzlovez @0revna0 @auroraofthesun1 @idli-dosa @buubsii @kaylasficrecs @that-daughter-of-hephaestus @itsdragonius @moonlightfoxs-cantina
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Could I request headcanons for Harleep, Astarion, Gale, Wyll, Halsin, Dammon, Rolan, and Zevlor with kind and patient gn s/o? This is quite self-indulgent of me because I have been told I'm too nice & so patient so I'm curious how they would react XD
first of all sorry for being so late, but my small brain has to process things multiple times to make sense, so i wrote this like... 5 times? So it takes me a while, but i hope that waiting was worth it.
Also i saw you sent a second ask to see if i recieved this one, so ill put dammon and rolan there cause this is starting to get a bit long:3<3 thank you so much for your patience!:3
Taglist: @sessils @spacebarbarianweird
Headcanon: BG3 men with kind and patient s/o. (pt. 1)
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Zevlor:
Zevlor is emotionally a wreck already, he considers kindness a virtue and it definitely makes him swoon when he notices you put extra care in making sure he's treated with kindness. At the end of the day, he basically got bullied on all fronts when all he really wants is to prove himself worthy of the title he carried for so long.
Zevlor has a short temper too, and he appreciates so much your effort and patience in dealing with his outbursts, whether they are of rage- not towards you of course- or of sadness, you offer always a shoulder for him and he cherishes it so much.
He is lowkey jealous when he notices that your kindness is not mostly exclusive to him, he has learned that people can abuse one's patience and care, and 1. he doesn't want you to get hurt, 2. he wishes your kindness was maybe reserved to him. Call him selfish, but after being deprived of it for so long, he is hesitant to let go of it.
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Astarion:
Initially he would be very wary, in his experience being nice always lead to him getting hurt, so why would he trust someone who's default reply is kindness? At the end of the day the last time someone was '''''kind''''' to him, he was turned in a vampire spawn, so he takes it extra slow, he has just regained control over himself, he won't blindly accept kindness. He's lowkey afraid you are just part of a bigger scheme that will bite him in the ass and leave him shackled and caged again.
Once he gets accustomed to your kindness and finally accepts it, he revels in the kindness you offer and your patience, especially the smallest gestures like opening a door for him. He will literally melt for it, he's already smitten, your kindness leaves him like mush in your hands.
Nevetheless every good side, comes with a negative one. He is dead afraid your kindness will bring you to get hurt. He often reminds you to be weary and keep all your kindness for people you trust (HIM), rather than going around and helping every lost soul that asks for help. He will fight you on this a few times- especially if you do get hurt or it is obvious you are about to- he will not bite his tongue and keep it for himself, and that's one of the moments when he's glad you are patient.
You understand where it comes from and you try your best to find a solution that would make both happy. Your patience of course doesn't stop there, he knows he's an handful: he carries an heavy trauma baggage and he has a feisty personality, yet you always show him you don't mind, that you are there for him and that he can take all the time of the universe to sort his problems out.
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Wyll:
Wyll would find it so endearing, how you are ready to go to someone's aid, you stop on your tracks to support someone in need, and he would love seeing you being kind to everyone. It's probably one of the reasons why he falls in love with you. Unlike Astarion he encourages you to be kind to everyone, cause he considers it a virtue, he incourages you to be the best version of yourself, and he reminds you that if you do get hurt, he will be there to pick up the pieces.
As far as patience goes, he's grateful to the moon and back, he knows he is an handful, especially if he doesn't break his pact with Mizora and has to leave more times than ever. He makes sure once he's back though that he makes up for lost time, whether it is with gifts or by taking care of you.
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Haarlep:
Harleep is so used to Raphael that honestly he's taken aback at first, living in the hells means that kindness is hard to come by and around Raphael? It's either a trick or a miracle, so he brushes it off, not repelled like Astarion would, but definitely not eager like Wyll either.. he would be probably the one that takes it as it is, just.. that. But when he gets used to it? He becomes unsufferable. So unsufferable that he goes around demanding Raphael to be treated with kindness and patience! He purrs whenever you are nice even the smallest, thanking you and praising you like a goddess. He even tries to be nice himself- to you only- and despite it has to be and effort, since he has never been exposed to much kindness, he does become a little more mindful, even asking before taking your form or just with small acts of services.
One time Rapahel makes sure to send a message to you through him. "Tav, Raphael asked you stop being nice to me, cause if i demand it from him as well, he's going to turn me into fertilizer", message delivered with a pout that begs exactly the opposite.
Harleep is another that is deeply afraid of your kindness. Let's be real, you can defend yourself as much as you want, but people tend to use people and your kindness is one of those characteristics evil people would pry on- he knows well since its literally part of what he does, and a facet of what Raphael does as well. He probably scolds you a lot for this reason, he does it in a sweet way- don't get me wrong- he sugarcoats the shit out of it, but he will let you know when you are about to get in peril or you are too careless with your kindness.
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Gale:
Gale is touched by your kindness, already from the first days after meeting him.
You had helped him out of his blotched portal, you fed him artifacts, you didn't question his secrets or push him to reveal anything, and he doesn't give that for granted. Once he's closer to you, and he learns that you are unconditionally kind to everyone, he's scared.
He starts warning you to be a little less nice, to use your judgement before you blindly trust a stranger, but he doesn't push it past a warning. As much as he wants to protect you, he doesn't want to take away your chance to grow from your errors.
In matter of your patience he's so grateful, he spends days thanking you when he's still afflicted with the orb condition, he cooks as a form of apology or thanks depending what he did, he gets baths started for you, he's treating you as a queen/ king. He alread would do it, but with you? He's even more protective, he almost feels like he has to match your kindness and patience with as much attentions he can muster.
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Halsin:
Halsin is a fair man you think he wishes everyone was kind, but he actually wants you to be fair, he wants you to be mindful of who you give kindness to, he wants you to be a reasonable judge rather than unconditionally nice cause it is the way of the nature as well. Nature is not only nurturing and lush, it's also the poisonous vipers and herbs.
Does he appreciate when you are kind? Absolutely, he thinks it's the best gift Silvanus has ever bestowed him, but it doesn't take away the fact that he wants you to be treated kindly as well, so the moment someone crosses the line and starts abusing your kindness or becomes rude, he's definitely stepping in to s h a m e the other person. "You are lucky you have met Tav, cause they are kind, but nature wouldn't be so understanding and patient" He says it with a rage you rarely see in his eyes.
He will do his best to remind you to surely practice kindness but also to be mindful who you help and who you are kind to, cause there's always rotten that can harm you, and lowkey if you get hurt he will invite you to take back what you gave.
Despite this Halsin considers kindness the bare minimum a person should be, and what stops him from encouraging you to be kinder, its just the knowledge that you might get hurt.
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r3starttt · 16 hours
Text
YOUR WOMAN
☆ lawyer! Abby
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cw: dom-top! abby. sub! reader. thigh riding. spanking. good girl-princess-angel.
Abby was beyond exhausted. This whole week had been full of dumb people bothering her and her current clients - a married couple, because there were papers missing or formalities unfinished.
And no matter what she did, there was always something wrong, and having the patience she has, whenever she was awake her humor was horrible, which lead to her keeping distance with you. Whenever she tried to sleep, she couldn't, and it was torture to see your clearly hurt expression or having the most stressful nightmares whenever she could finally close her eyes.
She'd proposed to spend the whole weekend with you, but of course she couldn't get what she wanted, ever.
Starting with her being awake early in the morning by the stress and all the caffeine she consumed a day before making effect on her body, still. Then, her clients panicking over another important paper deal that apparently had to do with her. She couldn't even have a proper breakfast, not even sit next to you and at least watch you eat and hear you talk about your week. Nothing.
So when the sunlight started to fade, you felt like a blessing appeared. Forgetting about how much you've needed her the whole week, you needed her to have a rest, to distract her mind a little. And what's better than you both getting what you much need in a little time? She sure can get some minutes for this.
So, with only one of her t shirts you innocently walked outside her office, around thousands of times before she noticed you. Or so you thought since you heard that pretty laugh she has. The one that she uses for mocking you, such a pleasure.
"Come here" she looked tired, and it made you regret your plan, just for a couple seconds before you saw the veins on her hands shine just perfectly when she patted on her lap for you to come sit on her.
"What're you doing? Mhm?" You placed your legs intertwined with hers, making yourself comfortable in the small chair she had been working at all day. Hesitating a little, you responded "nothing?"
"Oh, sure we're doing nothing?" Her fingers trailed a small path along the sides of your thighs, rolling the hem of your shirt up your hips. You, on the other hand, let your weight rest fully on her, positioning the palms of your hands on top of her shoulders to keep you in place.
"I'm pretty sure we do" your fingers grabbed the sides of her glasses gently, taking them off. While placing them on top of the wooden desk, you took a glance at the screen, almost darkening at how long it had been since she paid attention to it.
As much as you desired her, you couldn't dare to keep her busy from work, which didn't seem like the occasion.
Her usual braid was messy, with some locks of her hair dancing above her cheeks. You moved them behind her ears, tracing a path down her neck which was lately followed by your lips letting open mouthed kisses along it.
The pressure growing in between your legs grew at each move you or her did. Her leg bouncing felt like hell, and you couldn't help but rub yourself on her. You could feel her grinding, her hands leading your ass as she pleased.
Your last sight was her eyes closing, previously for you. Her mouth opening very slightly as the feeling of your saliva sent shivers to her whole body.
The grip on your lower back got tighter, lowering till her hands were fully grasping at your ass, trying to prevent you from moving. You only kept on fighting her. "Don't" she hissed.
You laughed in between kisses, ending in her clavicle connected to your lips by a small trail of saliva. Your hips kept on grinding on her lap, and by how her leg also kept bouncing you thought she was just fine with it, she wasn't.
"Fuck it, stop" her voice sounded too overwhelmed for you to take it serious, until she made you take it seriously. "Stop it, stay".
You whined at it, annoyed by all her restrictions even when she was the one that needed a hard fuck this time. You hate- despised that stubborn side of her, the one that kept you under her control all the time, because what else could you want on days like this than just please her and make her cum all over you, make her take a proper break. Fuck her.
You were ready to just sit on her lap, have a quick make out session and leave her alone, but that's not what she meant, and you knew it.
"Don't act like that" her thumb slided outside your lips, down your chin. "You wanted my attention, so bad? Then fucking take it"
Your tongue slid out your lips, making space for her fingers. Her hand pulled you closer to her, pressing her lips against you in such messy kiss. Drool all over your faces.
She'd laugh in between kisses, pressing you closer by holding the back of your head and practically lead you to where she wanted, how she wanted.
She could feel- see the damp spot on her pants, growing every time she groaned in your mouth, whined at you deliciously you'd tuck at her braid. She couldn't wait any longer either.
Her hands pressed on your chest, pushing you enough for her to have space to speak. "You're gonna take my pants off" she murmured, her nose dancing closely to yours "and you're gonna ride 'em"
You stupidly nodded, standing on your feet again, taking your time to get rid of her belt and- god, such gorgeous view. The warm light of her office lightening her legs, her thighs, her stomach showing once you made a mess of her and her blouse. "Sit"
You did as you were told, sitting as you were in the very first beginning. "You think you can get yourself off?" Her hands kept you in place, not even letting you realize what was happening. You just nodded, letting her manhandle you as she wished.
"Good" you heard her husky voice, her hands making circles along the fat of your ass, leading you up her thigh, then down her knee. You let out small whimpers, already pooling her whole leg, clenching at the emptiness. "Good girl"
Every time your clit rubbed against her skin- there was such an obscene sound, wet, loud. Abby couldn't help but widen her smile, you looked so inviting, so pretty, just for her. Smile that vacuumed out of her face the moment you, cautionary, tried to increase the speed.
Her hand moved off your ass, slapping it just a few seconds later. You felt your legs shake at it, such delicious pleasure with a mix of pain starting to mix just right near your cunt. "So wet mhm? Like it when I do that?" She mocked.
"Making a mess on me" her lips pressed over your clavicle, leaving tender kisses along it. Your lips kept right next to her ear, giving her the privilege of hearing your agitated breathing, your whines and pleads over and over again.
There was a knot of pleasure appearing on your stomach, her hands, her words, her smell, her everything was making you insane. The feeling of her bare legs somehow hitting your clit and arousal just perfectly, as if your bodies were made to fit with each other. You knew you wouldn't last long.
The plush of your thighs got harshly gripped by her fingers. "I know baby, I know" You replied equally, holding yourself with the help of your hands on her neck, now being lead to a much satisfying and fast speed than before. "C'mon"
"It's okay angel, yeah, yeah" Abby mumbled as she felt your body filling on top of her. She felt the wetness on her thigh increasing more and more, you could only thank her for it. "Ride it out, just like that"
"Fuck- abby" You let out breathlessly, your voice sloghtly acute. Her hands moved to your back, holding you in place. You looked fucking gorgeous. "Such a good girl f' me princess. Did so good f' me" your ears got covered in a wave of compliments, how you've done so good, how pretty you looked, all followed by kisses on your temple, circles on your back. God she was fucking sweet.
"Come here" you shifter your gaze upwards, meeting her eyes, so shiny and full of adoration. "Kiss" your lips pressed on hers, not caring about your still pretty evident exhaustion or the mess you've done.
"Do me a favor" she mumbled, giving you a short kiss after. You replied with a quiet 'yeah?'.
"Lick my thigh clean, can you?" a sheepish smile adorned your face, rolling your eyes yet doing as she asked you to, a favor, right?
Your feet stepped the cold floor, slowly getting on your knees. Leaning your head closer to her thigh, you stick out your tongue, taking a taste of the mess you've done on her. Your eyes never left hers.
Her fingers trailed the path of your cheek bones, as if she was still guiding you through it.
Your hands travelled to the sides of her legs, stopped by her own hands once she realized what you were trying to do. "Nuh uh, go get clean and take a nap" your tongue got back to its place, leaving one last kiss on her thigh. You weren't planing on fighting with her.
"Good" You stood up, giving her a last glance, taking note of how she looked even when half of her wasn't an unusual view for you. "Promise I'll finish... all this" her hand signaled to her screen, clearly still a bit stressed by her work. "Then I'll be with you, doing whatever you want, yeah?" You simply smiled at her, trying to let abby know she could always take her time. You'd wait an eternity for her if necessary.
"How's that sound then?" You humorously rolled your eyes "perfect" her hands opened one more time, making space for you. You followed her, feeling her hands embrace you.
"Thanks" she murmured, her voice muffled but her face being so close to your stomach. You laughed, completely enamored by her, your hands caressing her hair. "I better get what I want later"
Abby pushed you away gently, laughing back and nodding at your request. "Go" You turned around, getting to feel her hands one last time, on your ass, so sweet of her, right?
194 notes · View notes
snzleclerc · 2 days
Text
we’ll be alright
summary: You and Charles have been distant lately due to work pressure, but eventually find comfort in each other. Everything ends well.
❕gf!reader, angst, fluff, some smut.
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As another day drags you home later than expected, tossing your things on the couch, without a care in the world.
Your relationship with Charles seems to have been deteriorating for a while now. You've been together for quite some time, but at this point, it feels like you don't even know each other, despite living under the same roof.
All you wanted were some days off to spend with the love of your life, but the rush and daily madness always make it impossible. You slowly open the bedroom door, finding a weary Charles, shirtless and wrapped in the expensive white sheets of your cozy room.
Ah, so many moments in this room... You remember the day Charles surprised you with flowers and chocolates on your anniversary. When he took care of you while you had a bad flu. How he treated you when you had severe cramps. The little fashion shows you put on for him when you bought new clothes. All of this was proof that your love didn't end here.
But first, you needed a hot and relaxing shower to renew all your energies. With everything prepared, you step into the bathroom, turn on the shower, but don't lock the door.
As you rinse the last of the shampoo from your hair, you hear the sound of the door opening and come face to face with a sleepy Charles.
Silently, he comes toward you, takes off his own clothes, standing completely naked in front of you, steps into the shower with you, wraps his hands around your waist, and stares deeply at you in a way you've never noticed before.
It's a look of longing, emotion, but above all, love.
You admire each other for a few seconds before his lips touch yours. Your small hands go to his uncut hair, he tightens his grip on your waist, and the kiss expresses the same thing as that look. He pushes you against the wall and kisses you with increasing intensity, feeling his cock against your skin.
Slowly, even with the water running down your bodies, he kneels in front of you and puts one of his beautiful, moisturized legs over his broad shoulder, wanting to feel you even more.
The touch of his tongue and fingers is enough to make you cum very quickly; he lost count of how many times you came so fast that night. He knows the power he has over you, and you know it too. You haven't exchanged a single word, only your muffled moans can be heard in the bathroom.
He rises again to meet your eyes and starts spreading kisses on you. On your forehead, on your nose, on your temple, on your mouth, on your cheek, on your neck, on your nape, on every possible place.
A few more caresses are shared until one of you turns off the shower and you both step out to dry off. Without saying anything, you rub the soft towels on your bodies and exchange looks and smiles. You could faint just by looking at the beautiful dimples of your boyfriend.
You both put on comfortable clothes again and lie down, he with one hand on your waist and the other stroking your hair, he knows you love that. As for you, you have one of your hands on his strong chest and the other on his arms, making small circles in place. Then, finally, the silence is broken.
"You've been missed so much, mon cœur," he tells me, in the quiet of the calm room. "I'm sorry for the past few days," he continues. "I love you, mon amour”
“I love you more than anything in my life, Charlie.”
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celtic-crossbow · 3 days
Text
Blood Ties Chapter 26
Series Masterlist
Warnings: Mainly just pregnancy stuff
A/N: I hope I pulled this off while keeping our archer in character. Be gentle.
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gif by @daryl-dixon-daydreams
You knew it was bothering him, it was evident in the way he moved. The jerking slices of the knife as he made bolts while he sat cross legged on the old railing across from you. You were perched on the porch swing—he had all but jumped up and down on it to make sure it would hold you safely—just watching him, guilt flaring to singe the inside of your chest. He wanted to go on the run, get the things that you and the baby needed, but you were scared. Hershel had said the baby could come any day. It was at your insistence that Daryl wasn’t going. You didn’t have to try hard, mind you. He was worried about leaving you as well.
Still, it wasn’t sitting right with him for the others to be risking their necks for his baby.
“Maybe you should go.” You finally said, picking at your thumbnail. You saw his movements come to an abrupt halt before continuing.
“Nah. Ya need me here.” He sniffed, starting up on another piece of wood. He had legitimate bolts with his crossbow, so you could only assume he was just trying to keep his hands busy. He was so undeniably torn and it was showing.
“I think you should. You know what I need. You’ve read the books. Maggie will be there to help with the medical side of things, the list Hershel made.” You sat up straighter, attempting to massage the little foot away from your ribs. Of course, Daryl noticed.
“S’wrong?” He was climbing off the rail and made it over to you in one long stride, giving you a once over before he sat down. He didn’t ask before taking over for you, lightly rubbing over the little form of toes with the smallest, gentlest of smiles. You’d almost consent to constant discomfort if it meant you’d see more of that expression.
“Thumper has a personal vendetta against my ribcage.” Your head found your partner’s shoulder, watching that same laser focus that had moments ago been on the wood he was carving now honed in on you. For a moment, you were just a couple expecting a baby. For a moment, the world hadn’t ended. For a moment, you had managed to find perfect. “I love you.”
Daryl’s hand froze but for a mere heartbeat before his fingertips continued chasing little toes as if he were playing a game with the baby, when in reality he was simply trying to divert the tiny digits away from your ribs. “So ya keep sayin’.”
“So you keep saying. Is that all you’re ever gonna say?” You weren’t angry, not even frustrated. There was merely a soft curiosity that sat in the back of your mind; along with the little voice that assured you Daryl was yours and you were his, even if he could never say the words.
“Dunno.” It always unsettled you when he spoke so quietly, small and fragile as if he feared his words would end in some sort of pain. God, you wanted to bury his father in a gopher hole, maybe even his mother and brother. It was normal for a person to be unsure of feelings, to question and explore before accepting what they were, good or bad. Daryl didn’t have that capability. He questioned. He explored. And then he feared, good or bad. He didn’t think he deserved good and he was so attuned with bad that it’s what came naturally in his own reactions. Perhaps he thought you were trying to fix him, when that couldn’t be further from the truth. You didn’t see anything broken. You saw someone who had never been shown what love was supposed to feel like. He wasn’t broken, he just needed to learn, and Daryl was good at learning. 
Still you persevered, your fingers finding their way into his hair, delicately tracing the scar from Andrea’s bullet. “Do you love me, Daryl?” Maybe narrowing it down to a simple yes or no would make it easier for him. Maybe you were pushing him. You would need time if the answer was no but you would be okay. He cared enough to be with you, to raise Thumper as a family. In the end, that was all you needed.
But then his hand stilled on the center of your swollen belly and he lifted his head to seek out your gaze. Even with all the emotion stirring in those stormy pools of blue, you could easily see the fear, but there was something else. You continued to run your fingers through his hair, the color darkening somewhat as it grew. Even with that comforting gesture, you held his gaze, heard his breath stutter, watched his lips move so, so nimbly without a sound. His free hand came up to brush back your own hair, tenderly tucking it behind your ear. As he leaned toward you, the corners of your mouth lifted into a welcoming smile.
“Y/N, I—”
“We’re heading out!” Glenn called from the doorway before stepping onto the porch. Daryl pulled away fast, his hands on his knees, eyes downcast. 
You were going to absolutely torture Glenn before you murdered him.
“You sure you don’t wanna go, Daryl?” Rick had joined Glenn and was checking his weapons before he finally looked up.
Daryl, though, only had eyes for you; his bowed head angled to see you, questioning. 
You sighed with a smile, giving him a nudge with your elbow. “Go. Try to find those bra pad things. Cloths suck and they hurt my nipples.” There was no deeper shade of red that could color his skin. You laughed, loud and true. “Go. We’ll be fine.” Licking his lips nervously, Daryl nodded and left the swing.
T-Dog held out the archer’s bag and crossbow. “Thought you might change your mind. Went ahead and grabbed these.” He only received a nod. 
The group began to descend the steps, but Daryl paused at the end, looking back to you. He closed the distance in seconds, a finger hooking under your chin to lift your face higher, even though you were already looking at him. “Be back ‘fore dark. Promise.”
That earned him one of your sweetest smiles. “We’ll be waiting.” You patted your belly. The rough hand at your chin, moved to your jaw, his thumb stroking the apple of your cheek. “I love you, Daryl. Be safe.” He hesitated, long enough for something to stir in your chest. Hope? Excitement? Then he merely nodded and was gone.
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You and Lori were given the least strenuous tasks. She was not far behind you. A few weeks, her belly almost as prominent as your own. Luckily, you found it helped for folding clothing before stuffing them in the correct bag. Your bare feet were propped up in a chair across from you, your ankles swollen, squeezed by the socks that you had to wear to keep them warm. Your body just ached all over. Thumper Dixon was playing field hockey with your internal organs and the nausea you had definitely not missed was threatening to make a comeback. You just felt awful.
“The last month is the worst.” Lori commented while packing away some of Carl’s clothing. “And it’ll take a while after the baby comes to feel human again.”
“Growing a human fucking sucks.” You groused, one of Daryl’s few shirts lying spread over your torso. “And goddamnit, I have to pee. I always have to pee.”
“Means you’re hydrated at least. Silver linings.” Lori tittered. If anyone had been watching the two of you battling to your feet, it would have been worthy of more than a few chuckles.
“Thanks for going with me. Daryl would have a kitten if I went alone.” When you straightened, there was an immediate feeling of change in your body that had you looking to Lori, eyes wide. “Holy shit, I can breathe but I feel like I’m gonna piss my pants and my hips hurt.”
She smiled and placed her hands over her own round bump. “The baby dropped. You're carrying differently now. I wish we had a mirror.” 
“Carrying differently? What do you—oh.” You immediately noticed when you began to massage the taut skin that the swell sat lower. You suddenly couldn’t remember a word the old man had said. Were you about to go into labor? How would Daryl know? You couldn’t do it without him.
“Easy, Y/N.” At some point, the other woman had crossed the small space and put her hands on your shoulders, your stomachs brushing against one another. “It just means the baby’s getting ready. Though, I think after this run, Daryl should probably consider staying behind on any others.” You nodded, trying to get your breathing under control. In through the nose, out through the mouth. “Let’s go take care of business and then let Hershel do his daily thing, okay?”
You nodded again, a jerky motion while you trembled. “Yeah. Yeah, okay.” You followed behind her, trying to keep your mind on the fact that if you didn’t empty your bladder within the next couple of minutes, you would still be incredibly anxious but you would be so with wet pants. “Maybe the little gremlin can’t reach my ribs now.”
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You felt like crap. All day, you felt heavy and sluggish, swollen and nauseous. By late afternoon, you just couldn’t stand it anymore. 
“Carol.” You spoke her name quietly, leaning onto the dusty countertop to pillow your head on your folded arms. You saw the concern on her face when she turned from canned foods with which she was planning small meals. You couldn’t even wave away her worry. “Do you need my help right now? I think I’d really like to lie down.” 
“Y/N, what’s wrong?” She came to place a hand on your back, rubbing softly. It only succeeded in making your yearn for Daryl to be there, easing your fears in his own Daryl way. He would probably already have an aneurysm when someone told him that you’d done work, light as it was. And then you needed to tell him that the baby had indeed dropped. God, even if you didn’t tell him, he’d notice with that keen eye of his. Your stomach had shifted, still round but lower. There was so much pressure on your pelvis that you thought the bones might separate at any moment. Lori had promised that what you were feeling was normal, that it was simply new and you would take a day or two to adjust unless the baby decided to make its debut before you could.
“I just don’t feel well.” You stood straighter, nodding that she could remove her hand and you were fine. “I’d rather have Daryl come back to me feeling like shit and resting than to me feeling like shit and trying to help get things done.”
“I can’t argue with that.” She laughed. 
Carol was about the only other person in the group that Daryl dropped any of his walls around. With Rick, it was all business. There was respect there, but not yet friendship. You could see it though, the subtle changes in your hunter. He was getting comfortable around these people. It was a snail’s pace but if they were anything like you hoped they were, he would be granted their patience. God knew, he had earned it. 
“Come on.” Carol urged. “Let’s get you settled.” 
With each step, you whined, feeling less and less like the woman you had been only months before, like she had been left behind somewhere, starved or trampled by a herd. “I hate this. Is it wrong to hate this?” You grimaced at Carol who only chuckled breathily, her hand resting on your cheek.
“It’s not wrong. This is a lot. Our bodies do a lot.” A couple of soft pats and then she bent down to straighten the bedroll and arrange the blankets. 
You were watching, actually finding yourself excited to be off your feet and deciding that a nap wouldn’t be so horrible when there was a strange feeling low in your belly. It started as a gradual tightening but soon turned into an unyielding cramp, your stomach hard beneath your hands as you grabbed for your sweater. You gasped Carol’s name, could hear her clearly calling for Hershel but you couldn’t seem to respond, swallowed up by every fear that had been looming like a dark shadow for the past few weeks. The pain wasn’t even horrible, not like you had imagined at all. But it was terrifying. The only thing you could think of to do was hold the area that housed your little Thumper and whimper out Daryl’s name.
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A bed had been cleared, dusted, and made for you in the downstairs room. As you laid there, resting, and stared at the half empty cup of water on the bedside table, you overheard Beth and Carl animatedly re-telling how two walkers had shuffled by the driveway gate. The children had hid and remained quiet, reporting that no others were seen once those two had moved on. You weren’t naive enough to hope that it didn’t mean more were coming. The group would need to pack up and head out likely within the next day or so. 
“Braxton Hicks.” Hershel had stated matter-of-factly. He had expressed that he was actually surprised you hadn’t experienced them before then, added that maybe you had but they were so mild that you just didn’t notice. You had two more instances over the course of three hours but nothing since then, though your body seemed to be in a constant state of dread, waiting for another to happen; for it to be more than what Hershel had said. You were waiting for something to be wrong.
Beyond the dusty, tattered green curtains, you could see the light fading. Daryl would be back soon. Would he blame you for bringing this on by doing a little work? Would he be angry? He’d be beside himself with worry, that much was a given. Hershel had said you could do small chores, that it was good for you to be moving, but what if Daryl didn’t see it that way? The morning had started so perfectly. The conversation had been left unfinished but it didn’t seem to have been heading anywhere bleak. 
“Ugh.” You didn’t know what was more exhausting, your body or your brain. Each time you closed your eyes, your mind ran rampant with each and every wildly negative scenario it could possibly conjure. You groaned and rolled to your other side despite the effort and apprehensiveness of even moving. Letting your eyes close yet again, you fought against the intrusive thoughts, forcing images of what Thumper might look like instead. A little girl with Daryl’s eyes and your smile. A little boy with unruly light hair like Daryl’s had been, a constant scowl. You laughed softly, wetly, shedding a few tears around your smile. No matter the sex of the baby, you hoped for Daryl’s eyes. They were the one thing to always gave him away, no matter what expression he wore. With a baby that couldn’t communicate needs and wants, you would at least have that in your corner.
At some point, you must have dozed off, opening your eyes to the sound of the old truck Daryl was driving. Looking to the window, you could see the faint light of dusk giving way to the moon. He’d kept his promise, albeit barely. You didn’t care as long as he was back. Shifting and struggling, you finally made it upright just as you heard Glenn’s all too cheerful voice, though you couldn’t make out the words. Rick’s few words trailed right after. Then there was Daryl. He spoke but then there was nothing more than hushed tones. Hershel offering the day's events, most likely. A thud was followed by echoing stomps of boots pounding against the hardwood floors.
“Where is she?” Daryl roared, closer to the door.
“She’s fine, son. She’s resting. This is normal. It just caused a bit of a fright. She just—”
“Where. Is. She?!”
The old man must have nodded or pointed because the next thing you knew, the door was swinging open with Daryl’s silhouette backdropped by the soft candlelight in the other room. His shoulders were heaving in what sounded so close to sobs that you squinted your eyes for a chance to catch his expression before he moved, startling you with how quickly he had one knee on the bed and was leaning in to check you over himself. He was filthy, mostly dirt and grime, but spots of walker blood and a cut across his cheek that was no longer bleeding. 
“What happened?” You asked, reaching for his face but letting your hand hover in fear of hurting him.
“Don’t matter. Ya alright? Baby okay?” He was breathless, either from his haste to get to you or maybe just with worry. He was touching you without hesitance, his hands in a mad rush to feel your face, neck, your belly. You watched his eyes go wide and knew exactly what it meant. “Why’s it look diff’rent?” 
“Thumper dropped.” His eyes were dancing back and forth as he flipped through his mental catalog of reading material and Hershel’s words. Relief was evident in his posture when he recalled what he had been searching for, but he was still tense.
“Hershel said ya was crampin’. The fake shit. Does it hurt now?” You shook your head and watched him finally sink onto his hip beside you, scrubbing a hand over his face. “Shouldn’a gone. Ya didn’t need to be alone through that.” 
“Hey.” You leaned as far as you could, to guide his hand away with one hand while the other used his chin to turn his face toward you. “I wasn’t alone and we’re okay. It’s just my body getting ready.” Daryl’s head tilted, his expression displaying his gratitude for your attempts at consolation but also heavy laden with guilt for leaving you there. “Daryl, you had to go.”
“Didn’t hafta do nothin’. Could’a stayed right here where ya need me to be.” 
He hadn’t asked what you had been doing. Maybe it wasn’t that important to him after all. He seemed to be more concerned with what happened and how you currently felt than anything. You truly needed to start trusting him as you wanted so badly for him to trust you. Your palm left his face and wrapped around the back of his neck, not needing much pressure to pull him to you for your lips to press against his. It was gentle and chaste, his hand leaving your belly to cup your jaw.
“We’re okay and you’re here now.” You soothed, kissing the corner of his mouth. “Just—no more runs until Thumper’s here, okay?”
“No more runs.” He agreed, his eyes closed, forehead against yours. “Ain’t leavin’ ya again.” His hand lowered back to your belly, rubbing back and forth. It was always the most tender thing you’d ever seen from him. You didn’t think him the type but he actually seemed to be calmed by the action. “D’ya need anythin’?”
“Just you.” You let him help you lie back, but he didn’t follow. 
“Need to clean up. I’ll be quick.” He made to stand up but you grabbed his forearm and pulled yourself up again, not stopping once you got there. He gave in to your incessant tugging and wrapped his arms around you. “You’re gonna need to change too now.” You sniffled, trying hard not to cry, but you were just so overwhelmed with relief that he was back in one piece, that nothing bad had truly happened, that he was going to stay. “Don’t cry, woman. M’here.”
“I know. I’m just—I’m happy. I have you and Thumper. And—I don’t deserve you, Daryl Dixon.”
Daryl scoffed, rubbing his cheek against the crown of your head. “Ya deserve way better than me, Sunshine.” He took a deep breath that actually shifted you against his chest and then he was tightening his embrace. “But I love ya. An’ m’here unless ya tell me to get lost.” He pulled away before you could say anything, heading quickly for the door with one last look before he walked out. You were stunned frozen, silent. 
He said it.
He said it and you could feel that he meant it. His actions had always conveyed it, but hearing it from his mouth was everything. 
Thumper rolled and kicked before going still, reacting to all the emotions you were feeding to them through your bond. When you laid down again, it wasn’t hard to fall asleep. No wicked images formed behind your eyes. Just those words replaying in your head, a baby’s tiny hand gripping a large finger. A child’s giggle. And then his voice again.
Your eyes didn’t want to obey when you bid them to open, the mattress dipping beside you, the sheets moving. A warm arm pulled you against an even warmer body, enveloping you in a veil of safety.
Everything would be okay.
Because you loved Daryl.
And Daryl loved you.
201 notes · View notes
cherrylovelycherry · 2 days
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fairy of shampoo
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pairing. aventurine x gn!reader cw/genre. angst, mutual longing but are too dumb to understand it, slighty suggestive, mentions of sex, confused thoughts and feelings, insecurity. mdni synopsis. he starts to feel love for you, you start to feel love for him, but when it comes to admitting it, things don't quite work out. masterlist!
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Aventurine plops down beside you, pulling on the blanket to cover the both of you and catch his breath. It's just another one of those nights where he can relieve himself from the piling work and relax.
His eyes flick to the side, watching the person beside him sleeps peacefully. The fact that you would let your guard down in front of someone like him is amusing to him.
He averts his gaze away, grabbing his phone and checking how many messages he got after leaving work for a few hours.
"Well... seems I have to be off now, doll. Sleep well." Aventurine leans down to kiss you on the temple, before standing up to wear his clothes and gather his belongings.
Aventurine doesn't want to admit this, but he's starting to feel like… this isn't like his average flings anymore, usually he doesn't even care enough to cover them with blankets or kiss them goodnight. Plus… he's starting to fear that this fleeting moments will end.
He sighs gently, looking back to see if you was still sound asleep, which seems like the case with the even breathing and body movements. With that in mind, he slowly exits the room, shutting the door behind him quietly.
He takes a deep breath, feeling that familiar sense of relief wash over him as he exits the apartment. It feels like... a great burden has been lifted off his shoulders.
That's when he realises the mistake he made tonight: he forgot to leave one of his rings behind.
At least there he'd have an excuse to see you and not necessarily how you two always look.
The next day, he tried to think less about how your touch made him feel different.
Aventurine takes out his phone again, this time checking which of his adventures might take a call.
He pulls out his phone again, checking which one of his flings would be able to entertain a call.
But for some reason… he finds himself staring at your name.
"Damn, its been stuck in my head since then. Was it the sex? Probably not…" Aventurine stops his thought process right there.
Then he continued checking his phone, patiently waiting for another woman's response to confirm a date. It was supposed to be something to calm him down, but for some reason it doesn't work anymore.
But he can't do it.
Aventurine stops on your name, staring at your contact information for a good minute or two. Then he puts his phone back in his pocket, deciding not to meet anyone tonight.
Despite his thought process, he still can't help but think about you for the rest of the day.
Or at least that lasted 3 day.
At 7 pm on a Saturday, He finally receives a reply from a certain woman that he's been seeing quite casually these days.
"I'm free to go out if you want, handsome~"
She always ends her messages this way. It's almost comical how she is.
Aventurine chuckles a bit to himself, replying, "Alright, fine. Let me pick you up this afternoon."
With that, he's back to his usual self. The casual dates, the occasional sex, the meaningless conversations and the superficial jokes—everything that seems to make him feel in control again.
He feels… comfortable, for the first few hours, at least. That familiar sense of calmness washes over him again.
The dinner goes well, the woman is quite entertaining. She makes him laugh and he makes her laugh, they joke around and enjoy the meal that he ordered for them.
And after a few more drinks, they end up in a hotel room.
Sharing rough and somewhat needy kisses.
Sharing rough and somewhat needy kisses, touching and exploring each other's bodies, all for a few minutes or maybe an hour even.
Aventurine is enjoying the moment even if it's just a casual thing. He's in control again, that's what matters.
That's when there's a soft vibration from his phone. He glances at it, and sees that you messaged him. He tried to unlock his phone, but the strange feeling was wanting to appear in his stomach again, so he simply threw the phone on the hotel nightstand.
He had sex with the girl, nothing new.
Before encounters with you became almost routine, he normally wouldn't describe his encounters with other women.
This time he was able to describe what it was like; sour.
Nothing compared to you; something sweet.
He stares at the ceiling, feeling even more confused now. He feels his heart skip a beat again, making him feel guilty since he has a woman in his bed right now.
He tries to shake off that feeling, but it persists.
Then his phone rings. The woman in his bed takes notice of this, and even he has to admit that her gaze holds some annoyance.
The urge to pick up the call is rising inside him, but he forces himself not to. Still, he can't stop himself from glancing at the caller's name.
It was you, yet again. He sighs and ignores the call, his mind filled with a jumble of thoughts.
Then the woman in his bed clears her throat, speaking in a teasing voice, "Mind explaining to me whose calling a little late at night, handsome?"
He tries to laugh it off, but he couldn't help the slight unease that the woman's playful tone brought on him.
"Oh, it's just a friend. Nothing to worry about."
His voice is steady, but he could hear his heart beat getting louder with every breath he takes.
The woman gives him a small pout before responding with a teasing voice, "Friend, eh? I'm your friend yet this 'friend' has priority over me?"
He lets out an amused chuckle, and even finds herself playing around again now that he's settled his thoughts. The woman is quite entertaining.
"Oh stop it. Its not that important—"
He glances at the phone screen again, watching as it flashed the caller's name again.
The woman analyzed his facial expression, remaining silent and then smiling, "Then how come you're not answering the call and you can't stop checking your freakin' phone?"
He sighs, his mind unable to come up with any witty answers that he could reply to her with.
"..."
The woman chuckles, still staring at him and the phone with faint amusement and slight suspicion.
"You're very cute." She said as she got out of bed to start dressing and grabbing her things to leave the hotel room.
"Right. Cute." He mumbles to himself.
"See you around, alright, handsome?"
He only nods at her, watching her carefully as she retrieves her things from the hotel room. As she is about to walk out, she stops to look at him one last time, a teasing grin on her face.
After everything he had done, the sex, the dinner, the date—now it all felt...as if nothing had changed.
In his hand was now his phone, he was contemplating your name in the calling app. 3 missed calls and a some messages.
The strange feeling of uncertainty and emptiness began to stir again, making it hard for him to sit still.
He can't stop himself from picking up the phone and checking your messages.
The messages, filled with innocent inquiries about how he was and if he was okay, was something that he has never expected to feel.
One message said; 'i have the ring you left,' That made him laugh a little.
But he can't lie, it filled him with a sense of warmth.
The concerned messages from you made him feel good. However, the last message before the calls was what caught his attention.
This one said; 'hii, can we talk?', And next to the text an emoji of a sad face.
The message was sent 3 hours ago. Before he has sex with the woman who was already gone.
huh? Why?
He feels the familiar feeling of guilt wash over him, like a wave of warmth spreading through him. He looks at the time. It's already close to 3 am.
"Damn." He mutters under his breath.
After a little more silence, with nothing but the sound of his steady breathing in the room, he picks up the phone again.
Aventurine opens the phone's dial tab, and without hesitation, he dials your number.
The phone rings a few times, and for a while he felt the sense of fear and uncertainty, hoping that you'd pick up and that he was not bothering you at such an hour.
Before he hung up, you heard your phone being answered. Aventurine did not hesitate to speak; "Hello, doll. I saw your—"
"What." A male voice, exactly that of a little boy, responded.
Aventurine stayed quiet, his eyes widening in surprise as he hears a childish male voice.
"What-?" He said after a short moment of shock. "...Who is this?"
"No, who are you?" Even though the voice on the other end of the line was that of a small child, he seemed to be annoyed by the intonation in which he spoke to Aventurine.
"Are you Y/N's brother?" Aventurine asked, trying to maintain a calm tone despite the surprise this person gave off.
A pause, the boy sighed. His tone was now more calm. "Are you the person dating my sibling?"
"Um, no... well, yes, but..." Aventurine found himself unable to give a more honest answer with his surprised mind.
"I'm dating them," He said simply, avoiding all other unnecessary information for now.
"Then you're the one that's been hurting them?" The voice on the other end of the line asked, there was no trace of innocence in his tone, only anger now.
This one caught Aventurine off guard, sending a chill down his spine.
"What-? Hurting them? What are you talking about?" He asked, trying to maintain the tone of calmness even if the boy sounded like that.
"I have eyes, you jerk." The voice on the line now sounded angrier. The childish quality of his voice was now gone too.
"You're the reason why they comes home late and sad every nigh."
"You think you can fool me just because I'm a child? You don't treat my sibling right, or properly... You only want them for sex, you don't love them." He continued.
His mind was left in stunned silence.
He was expecting some more innocent inquiries... perhaps even for him to be scolded by a little kid who was just trying to protect his sibling, but not this.
"Um..." Aventurine took a deep breath to calm his thoughts. "Hold on, let me talk to your sibling then, I'll explain everything."
"No, their are sleeping now." he seems to be refusing the offer.
"But-"
"Stop it, just listen to what I have to say." The voice on the other end of the phone said, now sounding like an irritated older brother.
Aventurine kept quiet, allowing the voice to continue his tirade.
"Just..." The child sounded more agitated, almost on the edge of shouting, "Just get out of my sibling's life, will you? They deserves someone better who would treat them right; someone that would properly love them."
"I..." Before he could respond, the call was disconnected.
Someone who would properly love them.
With this line alone, all the other childish taunts seemed to have more weight behind it.
Aventurine had no choice but to turn off the phone and leave it on the nightstand. He was still in the hotel room, however that didn't matter to him now.
No matter how much he tries to shake it off, he can't get his mind to stay put.
...
Even if he wants to brush off the kid's words, this one stung a bit.
He feels like... maybe they were right. He hasn't been treating you right, in a sense that it's not really loving you.
Right?...
The next morning, he looked at his phone again. It was literally the first thing he did when he opened his eyes.
His body felt heavy and tired, something strange for him.
He didn't know whether to write you a message to see you at night or in the afternoon, since your brother's words still continued to echo in his mind.
"To hell with it." He finished by getting out of bed and directly calling you.
Not by sending a message as his head indicated, but by calling you. Something he regretted when he heard the static of the call.
This time he hoped your brother didn't answer the phone. And that you were the one who answered.
"Hello?" Your voice sounds sleepy on the line, but it was enough to make his pulse rise a bit.
He feels his mood immediately uplifted the moment he heard your voice, however it was soon replaced by the lingering thoughts of the night before.
"Is your brother with you?" He asked, his voice carrying a slight tone of hesitation.
"Um..." Your responses were slow, and you sounded unsure about your own words too, and that added to the tension that seems to be simmering between the two of you. "What?"
"How does he know about my brother?", you thought as you rubbed your eye, trying to wake up completely.
"Well, that doesn't matter right now." He tried to clear his throat, hoping that your tone will be more clear when you're fully awake.
Before you could respond, he cut off to continue speaking. "Listen, I just wanted to ask if I can see you today. Please?"
"Um..." You were hesitating to reply, "Could it be at night? I have to work today."
"No problem." He said, a slight smile appeared on his face when you agreed. "Great, see you then, doll."
"Uh, wait a moment." Your voice came inquisitively "Just out of curiosity, could I ask why you want to see me so late?"
He thought about his answer, as he was hesitant to give a more truthful response. And in a way, he wants to talk to you with no one else but him and you.
"Oh, um..." Aventurine thought of an excuse that could hopefully sound convincing, "I just thought it'd be a more intimate time, you know?"
He lets out a small chuckle to alleviate any suspicion you might have.
Your voice seemed to have been eased by his response, and you chuckled as well.
"Really? Intimate, huh?" You can't help but smile, it's still morning but your mood improved at the thought that something intimate might happen between the two of you.
"Well, yeah?"
"Are you going to say something cheesy like, 'just for the two of us?'", you said teasingly.
He can't help but laugh, hearing your teasing remark. "Maybe I would," he teased back, "Maybe I want to say more than that..."
"wait- I thought you liked cheesy." his tone still filled with a playful and teasing quality.
"Hah, I like it... when it comes from you." You also let out a laugh before responding, and your tone seemed more sincere as well.
Without realizing it, they both let out a sigh. The tension that had existed before had dissipated, now it only felt something strange, like a longing feeling between the teasing of both.
"Huh. Well, um..."
The two of you were silent for a few seconds, before he finally spoke again.
"Anyway, I'll see you later at night?"
"Yeah, sure. See you later," You said.
Before the call ended, you couldn't help but let out a giggle, something innocent compared to the flirtations between the two of you.
Although you knew, or assumed, that he only said it as a joke, something he did with the other people he slept with.
...
Fortunately for both of us, the time flew by.
Both you and Aventurine were already in the hotel room where you always met.
It didn't take long for the kissing and caressing to begin. Something he never did with the other people he was with.
It was almost desperately, as if they had needed each other. The pent-up wait on both sides was coming to light.
It was an understatement to say that you and him were having sex. Anyone who saw them would deny that word. Especially because having sex and making love was different.
This was more than just lust.
The way you and Aventurine would look into each other's eyes, this was truly something different.
With all the intensity and passion, all the pent-up need and want that both of you have carried for so long, it made it feel more than just sex to them. It was more than just a simple pleasure.
This was your mutual yearning, finally fulfilled.
Your bodies moved together, in a perfectly rhythmic harmony that was akin to an art of its own.
Everything felt new, every touch, every sound, every move.
Your body seemed to crave for more of it.
And he was giving everything to you.
Aventurine's fingers moved up and down your leg, stroking your thigh. Your legs wrap around his waist, pulling him deeper.
Your breathing became erratic, your eyes glazed, and your moans grew louder. Every second was getting more intense.
Both of you were no longer in control.
Your movements became rapid, your bodies pressed against one another. Your heart was drumming harder, faster.
That was when the climax was nearing. You were so close, your body was trembling.
You could see it on Aventurine's face, he was also close to his climax.
Your hips thrust against his, his fingers dug into your hip, your bodies trembled and heaved against each other.
The entire time, your eyes were locked together, and both of you felt like this moment would last forever.
However, good things have to end at some point.
Amidst all the obscene noise, Aventurine spoke; “Ah— I like you, Y/N.”
Your eyes widened, your breathing was still shaky, but you heard the words loud and clear.
Your face froze for a bit, as you weren't expecting him to say those words.
Your body ignored the fact that you were about to come, leaving you feeling nothing at that moment. As if you had been woken up from the hot feeling.
The way those words echoed in your head made you suddenly feel more conscious of what has happened before.
Your heart skipped a beat, then again, your mind was left dizzy for a moment.
He, after giving that statement, came inside you. Even that was something different for you, since there were usually no words other than "love" involved or him ending up inside.
On the other hand, you didn't finish.
As soon as he finished, he let out a small sigh as his body slowly softened. His body laid upon you, his head resting on your breast, and with one of his hands gently stroking your hair, tangling one of his fingers in it.
You felt a bit stunned for a few moments, still reeling from that statement— "I like you."
Your heart continued to race, your mind was still trying to comprehend the situation, or his words in particular.
Aventurine pulled away from you, his eyes glancing to the sides, a slight blush apparent on his cheeks, even at this moment.
It was a bit unlike him for him to look embarrassed; usually, he was cool-headed and collected.
The way he glanced at you and away made your heart skip another beat, your eyes then looking downwards, feeling as if you've done something wrong... or as if he did something wrong.
All of that for you was overwhelming.
"You're kidding, right?" You said, your throat feeling dry.
"I- no..."
His voice was shaken up, a bit shaken than usual, as if he didn't expect himself to say those words— or for you to react to it.
There seemed to be a lot on his mind as he spoke again. Aventurine was hurt by your words somehow.
"Do you need me to say it again?" He said, attempting a joke, but his tense expression and stuttering voice betrayed his tone.
Your head jerked up, eyes widened, and throat tightened as he said those words as a joke.
"What on earth was he implying? Was it really... the truth?", you thought.
Your mind filled with more questions, your head spinning with everything that just happened.
"No—" You blurted out, as you tried to stand up from the bed.
This was not what you expected, it was only supposed to be a sex session and nothing more. Like always. You didn't find it fun or nice that he played with you like that.
You thought that, that he was getting your hopes up since you believed that what he said was something normal that he said to the other people he spent the night with.
He saw the way you moved, the way you got off the bed, the way you tried standing up to put back on your clothes... everything.
Everything he saw, he knew exactly what your thoughts were right now. He felt a sting in his heart, your sudden reaction to his joke was nothing compared to what was going inside his head now.
"Wait—"
He tried to reach out to you, to grab your hand... but you avoided it.
He could see the confusion on your face as you began to wear your clothes back. Everything he saw now, it felt like a slap to the face.
As you put on your pants and underwear, you felt something sticky slide from your crotch. That made you realize again that he had cum inside you.
Your eyes stung slightly, putting on your clothes somewhat roughly.
"... please." He said again, his voice now more shaken than before.
He tried approaching you once more, trying to get you to stop what you were doing, but it was no use.
"I was being serious about what I said," he said again, "I... genuinely like you."
It was obvious that the tension was still high, and your expression showed no sign of softening anytime soon though.
"Please...don't say that again." Your voice cracked as you spoke.
You were afraid to believe his words, you were afraid to get more attached to him.
Your words pierced into his heart, his chest filling up with a heavy feeling. He was hurt by the way your voice broke while saying those words.
He didn't expect it to affect him so much, and he really was serious about what he said, but why did you have to respond the way you did now?
"I think it's better that we stop doing this." You said quickly, taking your belongings and leaving the room without seeing him again.
He remained on the bed, sitting in silence as you left. His heart felt heavy, and his mind seemed to be blank.
He thought that you would stay with him, that you'd...
Aventurine wanted to call out to you, or at least stop you from leaving, but he knew he wouldn't have the chance to do that because you already left the room.
There were so many doubts swirling in his head, so many things he wanted to say to you.
"Maybe it's better that we stop seeing each other..." He thought, while looking at the sheets on the bed. "...So his brother won't be worried anymore."
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yuri-is-online · 2 days
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Sorry for making you explain all the yutus but can you do Jades? Bros gotta be so overprotective 😬
Jokes on you I am always down to talk about Jade Leech (my beloved)
notes: they/them used for Yuu, for context on the fyuuture kid au can be found here and here. I think I typed up way more for this than anyone else up to this point, I'd apologize but it has been a second since I brain rotted about Jade, so excuse me for feeding myself (づ_ど)
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Put yourself in Jade's shoes for a second.  He is a merfolk from the coral sea, only able to appear human through the use of a potion but still retaining his inhuman features.  He tries hard to appear human, he goes to a boot camp where so many things have to be explained that he is able to mimic but doesn't fully understand.  There's no reason for you to like him, he knows that better than anyone; he doesn't fully understand why he's attracted to you himself but he is.  And he longed after you for so long, he was drowning in his desire that had such a little chance of being reciprocated but by some miracle it was.  You stay in Twisted Wonderland, you let him take you under the sea and agree to be kept there.  You're going to give him a family, he's beyond excited and filled with feelings of love he didn't think he'd ever get to have.
And then it's gone.  There's no evidence as to why, no one to tell him where you went.  Azul starts off confident, excited at the prospect of revenge and encouraging Jade.  They'll find them, between him, Jade, and Floyd they'll find Yuu and someone will have a very bad day.  But there's nothing, they're being lied to and stonewalled at every turn and when finally (it's been 10 months 3 weeks and two days, he could count down to the hours and seconds but who would listen?) Riddle of all people contacts them with a lead, he's dead almost immediately.  Turned into a phantom, all of those friends of yours he was so jealous of too… no one is telling him but he knows.  You're not coming back, he's never going to meet your child, he failed at a moray's one job of protecting his cleaner shrimp.  When he's alone he talks to you both sometimes, nights when you can see the stars are becoming increasingly rare as the sky flares up with ink but he likes to think you found your way up to the sky.  
When he loses Floyd and Azul he sort of loses his will to live.  The only thing that keeps him going is the promise of one day being able to lay them both to rest eventually, but until then he bar tends at NRC and listens to all the little things people talk about when the world is ending. If he was in a better place he'd probably find it funny how lose people's lips are getting, Azul’s business would be doing so well if he were here now…
That's what he's doing one day in September when one of the mage students runs up to him out of breath, Sherish he thinks her name is?  
“The headmage needs you in the hospital wing!”  She sounds scared, out of breath like she's run the whole way and Jade is just curious enough to go.  Something spurs him on to run himself, through the mirror and into the wing and-  
He doesn't even hesitate, his body acts before his brain does launching him towards you and grasping desperately at your hands.  They're cold, you're going cold and he doesn't have the warmth in his body to give you.  Something has mercy on him and let's your eyes open just the bit as you reach just as desperate to be close to him as he is to you and he feels your strength pass into him.  
“Don't apologize.”  He manages to whisper.  
“But I'm sorry.”  You cry.  “I love you so much and I couldn't forget even though they wanted me to.”  
“Who did this.  Who took you just name them and I promise you my pearl-”  he gets to kiss you one more time before your gone.  Jade doesn't move, he thinks Crewel is yelling for his attention but he can't move, he wants to stay here forever he has to protect you, why wasn't he able to protect you?!
“Oh holy fuck that tastes bad.”  There's a dazed voice Jade has never heard before, heavy with sorrow, and though he doesn't quite have it yet, Jade feels purpose begin to return to his heart.
Jade! Yutu is a menace.  I like the idea of him being some form of punk or goth, with piercings and a few tattoos that Yuu doesn't know anything about.  He grew up with a small group of close knit alt friends who would come over to Yuu's house and shoot the shit.  Yuu was really popular with Yutu's friends actually, he had mixed feelings about that. (No, his parent isn't accepting step-father applications, Joshua, keep running your mouth and see what happens)
Has a mixed ranged of emotions about his parent's amnesia. When he was younger not knowing who his dad was made him really sad, he'd listen to other kids talk about doing things with their fathers and he'd dream about doing them with his dad, but the picture was always blurry and felt just... wrong somehow. As he gets older and starts forming his world view he starts to think his dad might have left Yuu for any number of reasons. Did it happen before or after their amnesia, that's what he wants to know.
He has a pretty big problem with authority, residual trauma from the trip across worlds he thinks now… but back in your world he just didn't see the point of respecting someone just because they have more money and power than him.  Almost everyone does, that doesn't make them special!  But he's so sneaky about it, if it weren't for his clothes or his friends Yuu would hardly know what he gets up to in his spare time. It put a bit of strain on their relationship, Yutu sees his lies as something he does to protect his parent, while Yuu sees themselves as well.  A parent.  Who is the one who should be protecting their child not the other way around.  
When he tries to pull similar stunts with Original Timeline! Jade he gets a rude awakening. He tries sneaking out to meet up with some friends only to find his dad sitting with them, polite smile on his face clearly reveling in how awkward he is making this.  Oya, did Yutu think he was being slick?  He's hurt, no really this is the first time Jade has had to fake cry in years, he'd almost forgot how.  Didn't Yutu ever wonder where he got this from?  Because he had to know it wasn't Yuu.
Jade! Yutu also played in a band in middle school and also played bass, it just wasn't a jazz trio or an upright bass.  He would have liked continued to play in bands, but he shares his dad's issues with stage fright which makes it sort of difficult. He has tried his hand at writing his own music from time to time, but he's waaaaay too shy to ever play it for anyone other than the woods.
He really likes horror stories and cryptids, so he wasn't super afraid of the monsters when he first arrived in Twisted Wonderland.  One round with Phantom Riddle changed that nonchalant attitude quick, and while he still is very attached to the stuff he read about back in your world he hates blot monsters and Twisted Wonderland fiends in general.
Speaking of those monsters, Jade hates Yutu fighting them.  Father and son are an absolute nightmare for Crewel to deal with, one is threatening to drown him if Yutu is allowed to fight, the other is screaming curse words and saying it doesn't matter what Crewel does, he's going anyway.  He needs a drink (but not from Jade's bar he's going to get poisoned) 
I don't think Yutu actually told Jade he was planning on going back in time because he was angry and just assumed that he would try and stop him.  He's really proud of himself for the first few weeks he spends in the past thinking he got one over on his old man finally (he didn't, but he did hurt him quite a bit), but the more he interacts with the younger version of his parents the more he starts to regret that decision.
Past Jade is so… fun.  He thinks his dad is fun?!  His weird obsession with mushrooms was never something they talked about beyond a few compliments his dad gave to a mushroom patch he had on his jacket; watching his old man prattle on now he never would have guessed any of this.  Yutu never doubted that Jade loved you, but he didn't really think about what that looked like, or what you might have meant to Jade.  They just didn't talk about it, now that he's forced to think about it Jade was probably trying to focus on having him back and how lucky he was to even have that.  And instead of being honest about how angry he was to have lost you he lied and said he was fine.  With how good his dad was at knowing when he was lying Jade had to know that's how he felt, but respected his boundaries and didn't push. All those comments about being there when he's ready to talk, all the times Jade said he loved him, and those long nights he watched from afar as Jade sat with tea next to your grave, just talking to you as if you were still there are put into context. Yutu isn't able to sleep for a few nights after that.
Jade finds Yutu interesting.  He's a potential source of information about Yuu, a lot of his quirks remind him of himself and he finds the new kids blatant disrespect for authority to be hilarious! And hilariously good blackmail material, now now don't be afraid he really is just here to help...
"Nice try old man you won't pull shit out of me." Yutu sounds smug, but Jade knows when his spell has worked and when it hasn't; how delightful he doesn't seem to remember someone ever being so cocky about it before.
"That's a shame." He makes sure to make his face fall to keep the new kid off his guard as he continues his questioning. "It's just I am curious where did you come from? I thought Yuu's world doesn't have magic."
"I mean it doesn't, probably never would have been able to come back in time if I was still stuck there." Yutu blinks, clarity starting to come into view as Jade pushes through the surprise to ask a final question.
"Oya? And just why did you come back in time, were you worried about Yuu?"
"Of course I'm worried about my parent what sort of stupid question is-" Yutu returns to himself and treats Jade to a look of shock so rare and downright delightful he can't help but smile himself. "Hey just what did you do?"
Old man? What a disrespectful thing to call his father, no wonder his future self never told his son about his unique magic. Jade doesn't have time to doubt his affections for Yuu, once Yutu realizes he's fucked and can't get out of admitting that was the truth he tells Jade who he is and a bit about what the future is like. Jade can tell he's keeping a few details back, but he knows himself well enough to know that everything Yutu is describing would have changed him to a degree that he might not have been in the best mental space to help his son through the loss of Yuu.
Speaking of Yuu, Jade asks Yutu to keep his existence to himself for a bit. He wants to win over your affections without the help of the future looming in your thoughts, he only gets to have this part of his life with you once and he intends to savor it. But the confidence boost he gets from knowing you do end up as his mate does have him acting a bit goofy for a bit. Floyd and Azul are legitimately scared.
They are brought up to speed as Jade insists on introducing Yutu to them "properly" and he is every inch the proud father showing off their new baby to the relatives even though Yutu is practically his height and has a bunch of piercings. Floyd takes a liking to him immediately while Azul is a bit more awkward, not that he doesn't like Yutu he's just a lot different from anyone Azul has ever met before so he's unsure how to sell himself. Luckily he doesn't have to because Yutu appreciates his genuine self just like Floyd, Jade, and Yuu do.
Jade gladly invites Yutu to join the Mountain Lover's Club and is very excited when he says yes. Yutu finds a lot of enjoyment in helping his dad work mushrooms into Azul and Floyd's food by pretending to agree with their complaints. Floyd is so mad he calls Yuu and tells them to come get their kid.
The over protectiveness doesn't end exactly, but Yutu is more willing to understand and Jade is more able to explain himself. They're both extremely protective of Yuu and in sound agreement that nothing like Yutu's future can ever be allowed to come to pass. Jade wanted a family, so to learn that he got that and someone took it away from him? Future him was overwhelmed with grief but current him is overwhelmed with rage. Remember book four? He described what he would do to someone who betrayed him, and it wasn't pretty. His plans for whoever did this to his precious mate and child is going to get so much worse.
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vxnuslogy · 2 days
Text
forever. — ft. aventurine
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— warnings: slight spoilers to the current trailblaze mission.
— author's note: in celebration of (almost) aventurine day have this short drabble i made in school inspired by the song forever by noah kahan. also happy 100 followers <3
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aventurine was afraid of many things, one of them was “finality.” there's too much uncertainty and boredom affiliated with it. ever since he joined the IPC his life has been everything but boring. everyday he travels from one world to another making high stake deals that could cost him more than he expects, but he still pursued those stakes because who was he if not the ever cocky and lucky peacock of the stonehearts.
but recently, he's come to understand that “finality” — forever per your terms — wasn’t so bad. because to you, forever meant the countless possibilities that the world could throw at you unexpectedly. the limitless joys that can be found in every corner of the galaxy just sitting there waiting to be found.
aventurine wonders if he's one of those many joys you've witnessed; because you were certainly one of his.
how could he ever forget that one fine evening in one of his travels when he just happen to be stuck in a storm and coincidentally bumped into you, looking so breathtakingly out of this world. the many tours you took him on the day after, the shopping trips in the local and fancy markets of the planet in the weeks to come, and not to forget when you laid yourself bare to him under the promises of the many stars that hung from the sky.
“i wouldn't mind staying here forever,” aventurine wonders what that would be like, to settle down in this humble little world with you by his side. “but there's still so much i haven't seen yet — so many things you haven't seen yet. so the next time we bump into each other, let's get drunk at the tavern again.”
forever was once a burden to aventurine, but under that night sky his initial idea of forever took a turn because it wasn't a sentence to death; it was a gift he received from you.
“you're going to meet someone special in the middle of july,” his younger peared at him curiously. “they're going to show you one of the many joys the galaxy has to offer. you'll tell them that they're broke but still have so much richness in their heart.” he chuckles fondly when your face flashed in his mind, the times of when you slung a drunken arm over his shoulder and gave him another drink. “even after seeing every broken bone in your body they'll just laugh it off and say that it'll heal with them around.��
kakavasha smiled at the fondness on his older self’s face. the same purple eyes with rings of cyan stared at him when he kneeled down and patted his head. “and on the night of the final day on july, in a drunken haze, you'll say “my grip on you might loosen - you're not meant to be caged in one place - but i won't ever let you go.”
“why won't you let go of them?” kakavasha asked with a tilt of his head. aventurine only smiled and ruffled the younger boy's hair, “because they made the confident claim that we wouldn't be alone for the rest of our live with them by our side.”
aventurine used to believe that forever meant being sentenced to death, but forever also meant for as long as possible. he wouldn't mind being sentenced to forever as long as it was with you.
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