#finding it very difficult though

[revvethasmythh]

the thing about imogen saying that "if getting rid of delilah means getting rid of [launda] too, it's not worth it" is that it doesn't really change anything, does it? yes it provides laudna with reassurance that she is loved regardless of what lives in her head, but it doesn't mean that imogen doesn't still have negative feelings about delilah being there. "I love you more than I hate delilah" doesn't mean she isn't still disgusted by delilah. I get the sense that this is not an important distinction for imogen--she's said her piece, she's told laudna that she matters more, and that's the end of it for her. laudna matters more. her meaning is crystal clear: I love you and I'm choosing you.

but laudna has been obsessed with imogen saying she was disgusted by delilah watching them. she said herself she can't stop thinking about it, and marisha has said she can't stop thinking about it either, out of game. as far as they know currently, delilah's soul is twined in and around laudna's to the point where they are indistinguishable. the only way to get rid of delilah is to lose laudna. laudna doesn't know where she ends and delilah begins. imogen loves her, but imogen is disgusted by delilah. how does that work if they are one and the same? how does laudna cope with the fact that an inextinguishable part of herself is both genuinely evil and hated by the person she loves the most? at what point does being disgusted by delilah become being disgusted by a piece of laudna herself?

#it's WILD and fascinating and very difficult #I think it's a super interesting dynamic and I really want to see where this leads #because unless they find a way to get rid of delilah without killing laudna #how DO you have a long-term relationship with this hanging between you two? #and again I think it's a thing where Imogen just assumes they'll ''deal with it'' in some unspecified manner and it'll be fine #because love triumphs all right? that's how it has to be #but i'm not sure laudna thinks that #then again we'll see! who knows! it's interesting though! #cr spoilers #anyway i WILL maintag this one because i really like this one #critical role

[stinkyhyena9000]

Buster Moon Stimboard !!

For my Sing friends still out there, here's some food for y'all

🤍 💙 🤍 | 💙 🐨 💙 | 🤍 💙 🤍

Totally non-abrupt segway to a sentimental message:..

I just wanted to thank all of you for hosting such a lovely and wholesome fandom. I love we're a small community, but y'all have always made me feel so extremely loved, and I'm glad have had y'all be my first and sofar only fandom experience.

Please never stop making art and writing stories!

#I want to keep making sing videos so bad but there's a large assortment of reasons preventing me from doing so #(i say that like I haven't made a vid in like half a year) #anyways for starters I've fallen out of my over1yearlong Sing hyperfixation #It's kinda difficult for me to have motivation to spend hours on a video for a movie that I don't quite insanely love anymore #I've also been struggling to find time to watch the movie even though I very much have the time #something yada yada about ADHD and extreme time anxiety #I hope you all understand #(oh yeah also mental health has also been a detrimental but like ermm let's not talk about that y'all don't gotta hear about that lol) #ANYWAYSSSS #love y'all and please keep the fandom positive!! #buster moon #sing movie #sing 2016 #sing 2 #sing 2021 #mysing #koala stim #moon stim #star stim #blue stim #white stim #grey stim #eating stim #tie stim #red stim #fur stim #gray stim #yellow stim #stim #stimboard

[liquidstar]

a friend who'd wait :)

#im posting this very late because i was sort of weary of how it came out and ended up messing w it until it was like 4am oops. #and i have plans tmrw so... oh well! i did my best and ill put it out while i can! #and i tried to make the scene match barnard's colors lol #finn's ocs #finn's art #i know i said id do more sillay stuff with the simpler screentone only style but i had a couple more of these in me #and this is the first piece im making thats like an actual part of the story too rather than just setting stuff for fun #i wanna write something to go with it too but for now ill just sort of briefly explain the context in the tags here: #barnard has a pretty bad case of OCD and his compulsions have made it difficult to make friends in the past #he was never outright bullied or anything but people just didnt really have the patience to deal with it #he has compulsions that include stuff like walking through doors until it feels right and needing things to be perfectly aligned #which in group settings has lead to people having to wait for him to finish his rituals and join them #they might find it tolerable at first but eventually they grow impatient and hes just... not invited to stuff anymore #but juno is a newer member of the guild who ends up frequenting the same library. hes also kinda a little weird #and they dont become fast friends or anything but just sort of naturally spend time in the same place #though they never plan meetups they eventually fall into a routine. around the same time theyd just both be at the library #and read next to each other. and maybe talk a bit. and eventually they end up walking back to the guildhall together #since theyre going to the same place after all. and juno always waits for barnard outside the door #eventually barnard asks if this bothers him. juno kinda just tells him 'of course it does' without any malice or anything. just a statement #barnard is surprised and apologizes and juno says not to. but the next day juno doesnt show up at the usual time. #barnard assumes hes committed somekinda more by bringing it up. he ends up staying there late reading to get his mind off it & not ruminate #but when he leaves juno is in fact still waiting for him down the hall (see pic) having collected a bunch of books literally abt ocd #he fell asleep bc barnard stayed later than expected. and hes an eepy guy generally. and also one very bad at expressing himself #but now barnard gets that juno's 'of course it [bothers me]' had the implication of 'but its worth it' which no friend has previously done. #and from the interaction juno was also able to understand that this isn't something barnard just does for the hell of it so. he studies. #and checks a bunch of stuff out because he thinks it could help his friend too (theres ocd workbooks and such- i remember working w them) #and thats the point where they became more ''friends'' than ''pleasant library acquaintances'' #from there on they also do get into juno's problems. whole other bag of worms. but this specific scene is more about bernard from his pov #sorry about when i said briefly explain. i lied </3 #but compared to the whole sequence im picturing its brief so shhh

[loveletterworm]

Cool game where you pick up flashlights off the ground in the dark until you're holding too many flashlights at which point trying to pick up more will make an unfitting cartoon boing sound effect that I had laying around in my downloads folder

#With this process now mostly defeated I must begin to consider my next enemy: #Making an entire roguelike level generation system for some reason despite being stupid. #I don't know why I thought that would be a good idea. I kind of assumed someone else would have written down how this is done. #But it's weirdly difficult to find. #mypost #i think i might make the player sprite randomized as well or maybe just change it #(other than just making it not be a placeholder drawn in 2 seconds.) #because i don't think the little cat thing is very fitting. #i thought making the player a little pudding animal in scary world would be funny and distract from the vaguely derivative concept* #(* it may be diverging into being less derivative) #but i feel like it just kind of looks weird now. it could at least be a different animal... #This just isn't cat behavior. #(you can barely see the sprite because it's dark though so maybe you have no idea what im talking about LOL)

[warandpussy]

sit on lap 🥺

#s2 better give me sitting on lap … I need it for my health #i suppose he did sit on kinn on the sofa but kinn was lying down so I don’t think it counts as a full sit on lap #this is the return of the sock garters cinematic universe btw. a sequel if you will. #I’m putting it out into the universe so that people will start writing it into their fics #is important to ME PERSONALLY #my art #kinnporsche #kinnporsche art #kinn theerapanyakul #porsche kittisawasd #sock garters cinematic universe #also if the livhelens are looking at this yes I stole the reference from that pic of Hattie 😖 I couldn’t find anything else pls forgive me #also also I find this style of art very very difficult because I hate doing line art so if you see any mistakes no you don’t #I like it for fabrics though so I decided to suffer #if you’re still reading these tags hello sometimes I just talk to myself in here

[fromtheseventhhell]

*opens video* *sees their first "book accurate" point is that Arya overheard Roose planning the Red Wedding* *closes video*

#fandom nonsense #the thumbnail told me all I need to know though so it's not like I was very surprised but still 😭 #this is one of those videos you can tell is heavily influenced by fanon + the show so idk why they even bothered mentioning the books #god I just want book accurate video essays to listen to why are they so difficult to find 😔 #/messed up things from the books/ and it's literally just a fanon heavy compilation of theories #this person very obviously wants s/nsa to be queen based on the number of /here's how it could happen/ videos they have lol

[darehearts]

good morning bbs  !  whether it's a holiday week for you or not,  please take care of yourselves and pay extra attention to your well being okay  ?  🥺💞

#with the whole surgery thing now i've had regrets about how i never #put myself first even though it's all i preached about you know? so !! #holidays can be difficult but i have faith in all of you to get through 💪🏻 #i am not working today but sadly still have 1 hand to operate with #i'll be around sporadically and find a way to take a shower i hope! #i love you all very much. thanks for sticking with me <333 #tbd

[yousaytomato]

Okay, I got back from Everything Everywhere All At Once, I have some thoughts:

1. I demand more movies about figuring things out as an adult please. I am only in my mid 20s and I've already reached my lifetime "children have to save the world" movie quota, and I can only imagine it gets worse from this point forward.

I need to know that I can continue to change, that there will still be opportunities as I get older. Michelle Yeoh can, and should, play every upcoming role designed for whichever is the current <20 year old heartthrob.

2. Holy Shit this was a difficult movie for someone who has a rough relationship with their mother, especially when they fought yesterday...I know she would hate this movie, and that she wouldn't want to understand it either.

3. How do I find a person who is just happy doing laundry and taxes with me 😭💔 asking for a friend because I'm lonely

#everything everywhere all at once #tough one for lonely people with mummy issues. is what im saying. #seeing my friend was nice though :3 #some parts were very cornetto-trilogy-y ! and it also made me want to rewatch hardcore henry #im also watching rick and Morty...man i actually love alternate reality stuff like that #ik its very trendy - the mcu are doing it #but the way this movie did it was incredibly compelling #im happy i say it at the cinema because some of the visuals !! wow !! and the sound too #akdjjala they played that one iasip tune at one point lmao and it took me out of it for a second #but mostly. i couldn't look away. and i wished it would keep going #which is unusual for me because i find it difficult to concentrate a lot of the time #i need to watch a video essay or read some stuff about it lol #there was SO much happening #literally everything everywhere all at once... #ohhh man. i want to find someone else talking about the yonic imagery too because there was A Lot. #woes of emily #eeaao

[lunar-years]

Brain already churning on how to write about Jan Maas without having to write for Jan Maas

#royjamie #absolutely nothing at all against him I just find him very difficult to write #not that I’ve tried but like I can’t even conceive of where to start lol #writing #ted lasso #some of these are going to be so fun though. 😈😈 #Ms Bowen!!!

[ouatsqincorrect]

i’m back! i was gonna wait until next week but a couple of you guys asked some good questions lol

#fair warning i probably won’t be as active on this account this year #long story short i’m helping my aunt move my grandparents into their retirement home #or idk what we’re calling it #and i’m trying to finish my bachelor’s #and start a career in a very difficult industry #if you know you know lol #oh and i’ve got to make money somehow #:))) #also i’m still kind of dealing with burnout from ouat #i’ve got that fic sort of in the works though! #i’ve been trying to find time to write it so stay tuned for that #plus there’s still lots in the queue #which i will add to when i get the chance #headcanon/general asks are always open! #so are submissions #just please be patient with me :) #not incorrect quotes

[tothepointofinsanity]

[I received a lot of asks recently…I am happy that people continue to share things with me. One good feature about Tumblr that is a double edged sword is its ask function. I am too intimidated to speak to anyone myself, so the inbox functions as a medium between me and others. Messaging can sometimes feel intrusive to people, so I have only ever talked to one person on this blog. Nevertheless, I am really glad that people told me things or showed me pictures/memes or anything. Even if it can feel “pointless” to some people and other blogs that the ask isn’t presented in a question, I don’t mind because the way I communicate is vastly different to the point where if you landed in my inbox and said a string of gibberish I would still answer it unless something uncomfortable was brought up…]

#ASKS 💌 #hmmm I communicate through a sense of things #I find verbal communication difficult and challenging #I say as though I am not a public speaker and participant of social events #it’s just different #when it’s one on one I always have to take a long time #just to choose my words #so unlike messaging #the obligation of time isn’t there #which is very cool

[jacksprostate]

Just finished Laika Aged Through Blood. Really cannot emphasize enough what a beautiful and enjoyable game it is. Highly recommend it. I'm kind of shocked it's not massively blown up.

#i played using a controller but if you find that too difficult the mouse and keyboard setup seems to be significantly easier #i really enjoyed the challenge though theres a very real sense of skill haha. very rewarding #cant wait to replay it tbh

[fionnaskyborn]

pros of learning how to play fighting game:

undergoing a learning experience, trying out something entirely different from anything i have previously played

i get to look at a little guy do cool things on my screen :)

cons of learning how to play fighting game:

i am clumsy as all hell with the inputs

the order in which you press and/or hold buttons to create inputs is less like trying to get a sequence of movements right and more like playing a rhythm game (down then while not letting go of down press forward then let go of down and THEN press an attack button on the other side of the keyboard). i suck at rhythm games. hell world

sometimes, the damn things just... won't register? at all? you do a half circle to forward input and the game says "half circle forward? oh, sorry, that's ensenga :)" or, worse, "too slow, that's a regular heavy slash move :)". brother. why must you do me like this.

the area between the knuckles of my ring and little finger hurts like a motherfucker (though this has hurt in various areas since at least this morning, but i'm willing to bet that practicing quarter and half circle inputs for at least an hour did not make the situation any better)

#swear to god learning to play guilty gear is the ultimate test of will #but i am very determined not to drop it despite all of my frustration #it's not like i haven't dropped games in the past - i find it incredibly difficult to play ultrakill because despite the fact that i grew up #on shooters (from rtcw onward) i suck ass at ultrakill (though it's not like i was much good at any shooter that required quick reaction #time at first - it took me a good long while to get good at overwatch) and whenever i boot it up my mind immediately starts telling me that #all i can do in ultrakill‚ The Game That Revolves Around Being Fast And Stylish And Fun‚ is suck at it #which - you guessed it - means i rarely get the will to play it because i know i'll just end up neither having fun or getting better #and it's become very difficult for me to derive joy from trying to complete any videogame but that's a whole different story #and there's no way in hell i'm starting five because once i start five i'll finish playing five and holy shit i really need to start #visiting my therapist again don't i #too bad! :) #at any rate i'm not giving up on guilty gear anytime soon! it's frustrating but i know i'll start having loads of fun once i've mastered the #basics #also don't ask why i'm playing on a keyboard. controller's worse. this is entirely unfamiliar and weird and i don't have the muscle memory #for it but i will someday!! i will!!! #logs #Black Blank blah-blah-blah #< will be using this tag for any post in which i end up complaining about my life‚ feel free to blacklist it anytime

[adore-gregor]

ugh

#altough it got better in a way my self confidence is still so bad :( #some days it's worse than others it changes with my mood or idk #just lately i have been feeling kinda down about myself #i just have never been this naturally confident person and i feel like i'm not enough or not doing enough a lot at times :/ #when i was younger it was even worse and i thought of myself that no guy would ever like me bc i'm so not good looking #obviously that was not true and guys do like me and i would not go that far anymore but often i look at myself and think average at best #even though that might not even be true and sometimes i like what i look like in a mirror but i think to myself just good lighting or sth #and so often when i see a bad picture of myself i feel so ashamed like i'd just wish i looked differently #and when guys tell me i'm pretty or also other people i find it so difficult to believe that like i don't see that in myself #but it does not make a sense i know others don't think of me like that also guys i think of as a attractive but i don't see myself like that #but it's not just that i often also feel doubtful i will ever achieve much #i always think i should be finished with uni already or have better grades #and mostly that i'm not smart enough in general #but my grades are not even bad and i'm not failing any classes #like i just got another a in that class (i'm actually really happy about that one) but then i think okay but some people have all a's #like i could do better i could study harder #unfortunately i'm a master of procrastination as well 😅 and quite good at lol #what i mean is that i manage to study very little compared to others and still get good grades - sounds good but keeps me lazy 😅 #and i also think when i achieve a good grade often that i don't deserve it that much because i could have studied more #and that i just got lucky which is not very rational i know 😅 #or once i actually just passed an exam (i studied the night before) and i though yeah the teacher just felt sorry for me and let me pass #realistically i don't think it was like that #and at uni i studied for big exams which were feared by students for 2 days and got a b #which should indicate i'm somewhat smart but i think i just know the right study techniques and got lucky again #altough i do know good study techniques i think :)) #buuut sometimes i do things which are so dumb like i do have these moments my mind is going like blank #and it's not difficult things even #like in football we did this exercise of a series of passes and everyone got it but me until a few tries like how is this harder #i'm just kind of bad at envisioning like this series 3 dimensionally in my mind idk i usually get it once i do it and remember the movement #what it feels like

[treewithabark]

My mum met Juno for the first time yesterday and she adored her. Apparently she’d like to steal Juno, and honestly once her garden is secured and Juno’s a little easier to handle, I’d probably let her.

I’m just glad that she mostly behaved during my mums visit, she’s slowly getting better at settling in public. Juno is very good at first impressions, which makes me seem really mean when I call her a swine (affectionately)

#that lil squirrel was a gift from mother #seems like everyone brings her a little gift when they see her it’s very very sweet #i find it really hard seeing my mum because even though we’re only an hour apart neither of us drive #buses are an absolute pain and take ages #doesn’t help that we have to catch more than one to get to eachother #plus we both have health issues so sometimes spending 2 hours on a bus each way can be really difficult #i love her so much though and when I get my lisence I’m gonna take her on dogs walks with me

[ratcandy]

i'm going to be gettin myself a gecko soon and the evil demon in the back of my mind has already started whispering to me that i should name it zote

#i've wanted a gecko for yeearrss. actually ever since I was a real young kid #i've always loved lizards . actually thought for the longest time i'd get a beardie #But unfortunately my dorm would consider beardies too big. and since whatever I get has to come with me to colleg #it's gecko time #i'm gonna be doing a bioactive enclosure too so you know what that means. Fuck yeah isopods (and springtails but. Isopods!!) #i've been doin plenty of research for this and I am very excited for a new little Guy. Said research is a PAIN though because good lird #trying to find a consensus on ANYTHING about gecko care is SOOO difficult. Everybody's got conflicting opinions #but I'm Workin Through it #anwyay that was clam's late night ramblings for the day. thank u #clamtalk