#first contact of the ferengi kind

[cheeseanonioncrisps]

My personal hc is that, though Nog was the first, post-DS9 and Rom becoming Nagus Starfleet Academy is going to start becoming an increasingly attractive option for young Ferengi women whose families are more liberal in their beliefs but aren't as ‘radical’ as Ishka.

Cause I mean, Ferengi men are going to keep experiencing the pressure to earn Profit. That's not going to go away anytime soon.

Their religion appears to centre around the idea that it is a man's responsibility to earn enough latinum to allow themselves and any dependants (meaning both female family members and male members who can't earn for some reason) to enter the afterlife. Profit essentially = prayer.

Give it a few decades and I imagine they'll come up with some way to work around it— maybe Starfleet and the Alliance will rustle up some kind of ‘cultural stipend’ for Ferengi Fleet Members, or maybe the religion will start allowing for symbolic ‘earnings’ for unpaid labour— but in the mean time almost any male Ferengi who tries to apply is going to face exactly the same issues that Nog faced.

Concern from family members about how they're going to earn a Profit, and potentially resentment from male family members who will now have to pick up their slack.

But we can tell from the fuss everyone makes when Ishka starts earning that female Profit either doesn't count or is possibly actively profane. Ferengi females can clearly handle latinum that is earned by males (Quark sends his mother a stipend to live off) but they can't contribute to the family coffers.

So what can you do, if you're a newly liberated Ferengi Female who doesn't want to be married off and have to spend your life chewing food and performing Oomox on demand, but who perhaps isn't ready to bring Ultimate Shame on your family by earning Profit?

Well now there's an Option 3.

Yeah, you'll have to wear clothes. But I suspect that that particular social convention will vanish fairly quickly once Ferengi tailors start making Profit from selling women's clothing. And you get to have a job where you'll be treated with respect, with lots of opportunities for advancement, but no Profit is involved, so you're not stepping on any male family member's toes.

Hell, you can even spin it as a positive to your Head of Family (or a potential Mate). Like, they won't have to pay for your upkeep anymore, because Starfleet covers employee room and board. And you'll be travelling across the galaxy gaining potential business contacts for the Family.

And when trading with other species, especially Federation members, I suspect that having a sister or daughter employed and living out in the open would be a real positive when it came to negotiation.

Not only would you have a (wo)man on the inside, but you'd get to present yourselves as some of the New Modern Ferengi who are respectful towards Feeemales and Hoomans and are definitely nothing like those other Ferengi you may have heard about, who are just awful.

It'd be the equivalent of irl corporations tweeting about feminism to advertise how progressive they are.

#star trek #ferengi #ferengi females #starfleet #star trek headcanons #meta #headcanons

[sshbpodcast]

Some directives were meant to be broken

By Ames

[Edited to add: Since there’s a lot of debate on whether the Prime Directive only applies to uncontacted races or not, check out our post “Star Trek Prodigy fully defined the Prime Directive” for the canon rules in either scenario. Live long and prosper!]

To uphold or not to uphold, that is the question. Everyone and their grandmothers tend to confuse Star Trek’s guidelines for first contact and the Prime Directive, so let’s make things clear: this week on A Star to Steer Her By, we’re talking about the Federation’s capability to interfere with the cultures of other races, fullstop. That includes uncontacted, prewarp races and how we shouldn’t make ourselves known to them because it will affect their development; but that also includes races whom we talk to all the time and how we shouldn’t make them stop worshiping their gods or participating in their normal customs or engaging in their silly wars. Until we should…

And frequently, it’s a fine line that all depends on how any given captain interprets the situation. I whipped up a sort of Prime Directive Compass graphic (above) that is so arbitrary I’m not sure I could defend most of the placements of each episode in particular, but it does maybe give a decent overall look at scenarios in which captains maintain or break the first general order and how badly it impacts the alien culture.

Interestingly, some trends emerged, so read on below or listen to this week’s very in-the-weeds chatter on the podcast (discussion starts at 1:18:23) for some examples of brave captains going out of their way to help a struggling society and for other examples of stubborn morons entirely botching their dealings with other races. What harm could it do?

[images © CBS/Paramount]

Uphold/Good – Repairing Cultural Contamination

In the ideal scenario, upholding the Prime Directive has no effect on the other people. At all. Those would be points on the x axis with entirely neutral, entirely boring outcomes. But since watching things go swimmingly wouldn’t make for very watchable television, the episodes that I’d say fit this category tend to be ones in which the crew goes in to undo someone else’s breaking of the Prime Directive. The society is already contaminated, so these kinds of episodes skew the rules a little bit because someone needs to at least lessen the impact.

Spoilers follow a little here because the recent Prodigy episode “All the World’s a Stage” made for a really compelling example of this. When the Protostar crew happens upon the “Enderprizians,” it’s clear some contamination has already occurred but is actually benefiting the society. Dal and crew don’t just go in and fix everything; they empower the aliens to be able to fix it themselves and it’s so sweet I’m getting a sugar rush just thinking about it.

Other good examples of fixing someone else’s breaking of the Prime Directive include bringing some perspective to the gangster planet in “A Piece of the Action,” throwing a wrench into the workings of Nazi planet in “Patterns of Force,” removing the Ferengi taking advantage of a gullible race in “False Profits,” going to battle for the Ba’ku when it’s clear Admiral Dougherty’s plan is evil as hell in Insurrection, and I guess bringing a little bit of peace to the Yangs and the Kohms in “Omega Glory,” though I’d prefer that last one just not exist at all.

—

Uphold/Bad – Abiding by the Letter of the Law

Episodes about blindly upholding the Prime Directive even when it’s bad for the society in question are some of the hardest to justify. Frequently, it feels like the Starfleet representative is just being obstinate in enforcing the non-interference rule because getting involved and making things better would entail real work. The corrupt, endangered, or backwards society is left to fend for themselves instead of get better. This week on the podcast, we covered Voyager’s “Thirty Days,” in which Paris is punished for trying to help a people whose refusal to change their ways will result in planetary collapse. It’s agonizing to watch Captain Janeway not only tie her own hands in dealing with the Moneans, but literally shoot down their salvation. Pew pew.

Some may say (as Chris did in his DS9 fanfic as heavy-handedly as he could) that hiding behind the Prime Directive does more damage than good in these situations. The Federation’s intentions may be to allow for the cultural rights and unguided development of individual societies, but everyone also gets to wash their hands of any self-inflicted consequences because this group of savages did it to themselves. These kinds of episodes make for great points of discussion: Is Picard at fault when many Brekkians will ultimately die of withdrawal in “Symbiosis”? Should Phlox have given the Valakians the cure (that he already made!) for their disease in “Dear Doctor”? How much should we fully loathe Archer for chastising Trip when he stands up for the rights of an oppressed gender in the rage-inducing “Cogenitor”? (Answers: Probably; Why not?; and A lot!)

And sure, sometimes our heroes try their hardest to break the Prime Directive but it just doesn’t do any good. TNG’s “The Outcast” and “Half a Life” and SNW’s “Lift Us Where Suffering Cannot Reach” come to mind in portraying attempts by characters to convince a race to stop being assholes that ultimately have no effect. The results are the same: more people will suffer because all we could do was stand aside and watch.

—

Break/Good – Taking a Moral Stand

On the exact opposite side of the spectrum are those instances in which our upstanding crewmembers stand up for what’s right even if it technically means getting involved in the affairs of another race. These are the episodes in which we say “Screw the Prime Directive! These people need our help!” If Tom had actually gotten away with altering the Moneans’ status quo, “Thirty Days” would have flipped over to this side of the compass, but certain Tuvix-murderers felt like upholding the law for once.

The series premiere episode “Strange New Worlds” of the show with the same name (why, Star Trek, why?) does a great job of putting morals first and shoving the first directive someplace else. Sure, there’s a little bit of cultural contamination due to the [spoiler redacted spoiler redacted] in the season 2 finale of Discovery, but Pike gives up on just trying to fix things and throws any semblance of coverup out the podbay doors, utterly annihilating every word of the Prime Directive because the Kiley were at the brink of a nuclear war that could destroy the planet. There aren’t many better reasons to break the Prime Directive than that...

...but I’m gonna list some more anyway because you’re here. It’s nice to save races from extinction even if the Prime Directive dictates that would be their natural course and people like Phlox can go screw themselves. So we see: Data advocating to save the volcano planet Drema IV in TNG’s “Pen Pals,” Janeway closing the Malons’ nuclear dumping site in “Night,” and Georgiou fixing a well in the teaser of the Discovery premiere “The Vulcan Hello.” We also witness smaller victories like freeing Tosk in DS9’s “Captive Pursuit” in which Sisko pretends he’s abiding by the Prime Directive when he’s totally not, Janeway sneaking telepaths through a checkpoint in “Counterpoint,” and Nikolai Rozhenko relocating some Boraalans from their dying world in “Homeward,” among several others you can look up yourself.

—

Break/Bad – Interfering with Primitive Societies

Let’s wrap things up with all the times everything goes completely off the deep end. These are cases in which not only is the Federation putting their nose where it doesn’t belong, but it’s also sneezing all over the alien race to boot. Most typically, we see these episodes surrounding more primitive societies because it’s so easy to entirely upend their ways of life with our advanced ideas and killing contraptions.

We’ve given Admiral Jameson shit before (he’s in Jake’s early blogpost Top 10 Worst Starfleet Admirals), but he’s worth kicking a few more times since what he does in TNG’s “Too Short a Season” is that effed up. This is a man who negotiated a hostage situation by giving a revenge-obsessed tribal chief on Mordan IV all the weapons he wanted. Then Jameson thought a good loophole around the Prime Directive would be to give weapons to the rival tribe as well, providing for a costly civil war. It’s only fair that way! Right?

Starfleet just can’t stop interfering with bands of people in developing societies! We see it also when Kirk notices Klingons giving weapons to one tribe on the planet Neural so he gives weapons to the other side in “A Private Little War,” when Peanut Hamper selfishly uses the Areore for her own advancement in the recent Lower Decks episode “A Mathematically Perfect Redemption,” and when the Federation trades with the Rutian government during a time of social upheaval in “The High Ground,” and many more! There goes the neighborhood!

—

There are way more episodes to mention and arguments to make about where they align in the chart, but I’m ready to let a negotiator handle the rest of this. Suffice it to say that breaking the Prime Directive is about as Starfleet as putting deltas on everything, but about fifty percent of the time it blows up in your face.

Keep your duckblind facing here for more blogposts, and make sure you’re matching speed with us in our watch-through of Voyager over on SoundCloud or wherever you unencrypt your podcasts. You can also break the Prime Directive by communicating with us on Facebook or Twitter, but use your best judgment because we’re still developing warp drive.

#star trek #star trek podcast #podcast #prime directive #first contact #the original series #the next generation #deep space nine #voyager #enterprise #discovery #lower decks #prodigy #strange new worlds #cultural contamination

[motsimages]

Here is my list of my Favourite Episodes in DS9 (in whichever order I remember them):

House of Quark: it has everything I need. No humans. Cultural differences. Excellent comedy timing. Klingons. Quark. 10/10 would use it to cheer me up on a bad day. I think of it often. Indescribable.

Tribunal: It corresponds with the mandatory episode of O'Brien Must Suffer but we have a good insight in Cardassian culture and the lawyer gives me life. About to retire, caring the bare minimum to see if he can retire, exasperated at the lack of communication with his client... And Cardassians about to kill somebody because these aliens keep interrupting them. The comic reliefs are gold in this episode.

Captive Pursuit: I love the character design for the Tosk, and it is a story of a first contact done quite well. There is the slight cultural shock. The alien is very alien-like, with gestures that are not the same as everyone else's. And the arc itself is very interesting. I wish they had more time to tell us about them or that they would have appeared in another episode.

The assignment: Finally an episode with Keiko but it's not Keiko. We see what we miss because they didn't know what to do with this magnificent actress but the tension is constant from minute one. It's horrifying, you can't stop watching, you can't find a solution, you feel as trapped as Miles and they just keep adding to it.

In the cards: The same we had a O'Brien Must Suffer, we should have been given a Nog and Jake Have An Idea per season. I like how this one kind of mirrors the one where it's Nog who wants to make profit selling self-sealing stem bolts and Jake helps him and he happens to know better than Nog how to do it. This time, it's Nog putting to use his Ferengi skills, we get to learn about an extra piece of lore in Ferengi culture and it's overall a very fun episode after some dramatic episodes. And when it couldn't be sillier, they have to fucking negotiate with Weyoun.

Valiant: Another episode where you can't stop looking, you feel like Jake trying to shake them and see if they wake up, but at the same time, what the fuck is wrong with Starfleet as a whole? In a series that is constantly questioning Federation policies, where they introduced the Jem'Hadar and all they entail, they bring us human child soldiers. Excellent acting, excellent story. Very poignant.

Chimera: This would have been a wonderful episode for season 3. They could have made a very interesting arc from the idea of "what about the other hundred? Won't you look for them?". I like how it mirrors Jadzia and her ex-wife meeting again and how they use the link metaphor to give us a gay love story mine de rien. Again, if this episode happened sooner, Odo could have explored many of the points Laas makes (which are very good points, even if he is a bit of an asshole) but it is still fascinating that they managed to make this episode with all those points and left it there. Also, kudoz for mentioning Martok while the actor playing Martok is there being someone else.

And not episodes but two of the best moments of the series are:

When Kira is about to leave and one by one they come to say bye and it ends up being like a Marx Brother's sketch.

When Keiko is pregnant again and they come to Quark's to give the news. The dialogue between Bashir, Miles, Quark and when it couldn't be better, Worf.

Special medal goes to: the comic relief in Far Beyond The Stars being us recognising actors out of make up. Shout out to the unexpected suave of Worf.

They had a golden team in this series to do what they wanted and they did.

#Star Trek #Star Trek: DS9 #DS9

[jimintomystery]

DS9: "The Jem'Hadar"

A camping trip in the Gamma Quadrant goes awry when Commander Sisko and Quark are captured by the Jem'Hadar, a race of enforcers for the Dominion. Sisko's son Jake and Quark's nephew Nog struggle to contact Deep Space Nine for help. But the station already knows they're in danger...because the Jem'Hadar have warned the crew not to trespass on their side of the wormhole.

At last we meet the mysterious Dominion, and they live up to the hype with big mean dinosaur men! I'm a sucker for dinosaur men.

The first time I watched this, I really dug the way Sisko and Quark sort of stumble into the middle of someone else's story. The Jem'Hadar are hunting down Eris, a telekinetic refugee from Kurill Prime, who doubts the existence of the mythical Founders. It's tantalizing stuff that could lead into all kinds of future stories. Unfortunately nearly everything we learn about the Dominion in this episode will turn out to be disinformation.

Watching it back now, I find myself wondering why the Dominion go to the trouble of spinning such complex lies. I think the key lies in the way Talak'talan taunts Sisko with trivia about the Alpha Quadrant, to demonstrate how much the Dominion has already learned about "our" side. The Dominion want to know how much the Alpha Quadrant knows about them, and a slick way to test that is to tell a lie and see if our heroes know enough to challenge it.

The one hard truth we learn about the Dominion is that their technology has the Federation over a barrel. Talak'talan casually strolls through DS9's force fields, beaming in and out as he pleases. Dominion weapons cut through the USS Odyssey's shields like tissue paper. I particularly like that the Jem'Hadar use small fighters to swarm an enemy, in contrast to the trend we've seen on Star Trek thus far of making spaceships tougher by making them bigger. It's just a couple of key differences, but it's enough to make the Dominion a big shakeup in the balance of power.

Quark has a couple of monologues in this episode designed to cut Sisko down to size for his bias against the Ferengi. It's certainly food for thought, since the show is only just starting to treat the Ferengi as a genuine alien culture and not simply two-dimensional shysters. But over the years I've found Quark's rhetoric less and less persuasive. He's appealing to the paradox of tolerance, in that he demands human empathy for Ferengi values that prevent him from reciprocating in good faith. Admittedly, Quark makes a valid point about human barbarism, but I don't need a lecture about it from a guy who keeps his mother naked and locked in her house.

#star trek #deep space nine #star trek: deep space nine #ds9 season 2 #we are of bajor

[grissomesque]

For the Star Trek asks, please: 7, 15, and 16.

You always give me the hard ones! 7. Episode you could watch over and over?

Since I already answered this one I'll switch to movies and say: First Contact. But also, if I literally had to pick a single episode from all of Trek... I guess I would stick with Counterpoint? I just had the wild urge to say Killing Game pt 1 which is pretty bisexual of me, so, honorable mention.

15. Worst alien makeup/costume?

I don't know if it's fair to say Armus, because 1988, but that dude was like an anti-nicotine ad. Armus is violent wet asphalt. 0/10.

I also do not like aliens with holes in their faces because I have that thing, (pause for Google) trypophobia, disgust of little holes in alien faces.

16. Best alien makeup/costume?

I'm gonna stick with OG trek because it's unfair to compare Moist Armus to anything from AOS and newer.

I kind of want to say the Antedians (the fish guys) in TNG because of how unhinged that decision was, and they really just leaned all the way into it, and that it was the Fleetwood Mac drummer under there, like. Amazing choices across the board. Seems expensive AF. But I will properly say the Hirogen. Trek mostly failed to make villains feel villainous (see: Ferengi), but I think they nailed it with the Hirogen. I wish they'd kept them as tall as they originally appeared. But thorough transformation on the makeup, seems like believable alien evolution, menacing armor. 9/10, 1 point reduction for 1 ft height reduction.

Thank you for the ask! 💕😘

Star Trek Asks

#star trek asks

[soulerflaire]

What's even worse is that this show thinks Archer is just the coolest. It presents him as this great legendary hero, the founder of the Federation, without him everything falls apart. The future reveres him. He instantly inspires loyalty in everyone around him. His plans always succeed. His enemies respect him and see him as their greatest foe, but also like him and want to be his friend. He outthinks Vulcans, outfights Klingons. He's strong, charismatic, cunning.

Except he's not. He does nothing to inspire loyalty in others; they simply fall in love with him the first time he says or does something nice. His plans are always just brute force solutions; they only succeed because the universe bends over backwards to make it happen. He doesn't outthink Vulcans, because the Vulcans on this show aren't Vulcans, they're emotional idiots.

He's stubborn, racist, immoral, and violent, and this show idolizes him for it. This man is the writers' idea of the perfect starship captain.

And they do everything they can think of to try to make him better than the other captains. Kirk dealt with Romulans first? No, actually it was Archer, and his ship could see through Romulan cloaking tech. Picard had the first encounter with the Ferengi? No, it was Archer, and he outsmarted them even better than Riker did! Picard and Janeway both defeated the Borg? Well, um, well, Archer did it first, and he didn't have as good weapons, but he beat time traveling Borg. In fact, he was cleaning up the Borg Picard left behind in First Contact! And Archer is smarter than Vulcans! And, and, and he saved Earth from total annihilation by the Xindi! It's like a little kid talking about a character he made up, and arguing with his friends that this character is totally way better than those other ones.

And the thing is, they don't do any better of a job explaining how Archer does all this than the little kid who just goes "Nuh-uh, Archer's the best!" The scenes where he's using "diplomacy", most of the time he's just repeating the same things over and over, but louder each time. T'Pol becomes devoted to him, but there's never anything to explain why beyond "He didn't leave her behind on a mission early on." His plans are half-assed and full of holes, but then they just work out in the end anyway.

The only explanation for half his accomplishments is "The writers wanted him to win." And they think it's soooooooo cool when a Star Trek captain bends morals. They make Archer do it constantly, and act like he's some kind of hero for it, like he had no choice. But the writing is so bad that they don't even do that right. Most of the time, there's plenty of other options, but those options wouldn't have Archer hurt people to get what he wants, so they aren't as "cool".

I'm on the last season. I am going to finish this show, but by god, it's hot garbage. At least Picard had cool ideas, even if it did abandon them every season. Enterprise has nothing.

#Enterprise commentary #S4 no particular episode

[therealaves-blog1]

I want the void to hear my takes on Star Trek: Coda

Luc Picard and the Wesley Mirror Enterprise Bois go to the mainverse and start scanning black holes to find the Devidian's hiding place (they need a certain size black hole to make a breach to intertime or whatever) Riker detects them arriving and goes after them hard, since most of the admiralty is dead he's ranking so he's calling in the fleet and puts a bounty on the ship among the other powers to get to Picard (he thinks they're hiding main Picard). He also is spying on Troi and recruited his caitian aide to do it as well. The bridge crew is absolutely nervous about his increasingly erratic behaviour, especially when Enterprise jaunts away and he starts calling them all morons.

Kira gets aboard her transport, uncomfortable but understanding how everyone feels a lot of bad stuff towards her awful fucking counterpart. Her transport picks her up and its Alt-Ezri in command of the refit Defiant of the mirrorverse, she's also bonded to Dax now for some reason. Kira is understandably very upset by this whole fucking thing, but keeps it together. I'm pretty sure Alt-Dax died off screen? Or at least was implied to in the ferengi fuck around ep in the mirrorverse. (Zek your brain is so big).

Spock and AltSavik meet the Prime Minster of the Commonwealth: Michael Eddington.

Truly this is a hell dimension.

Eddington tells them the parliament is arguing constantly and not doing anything about this whole end of the world thing. He and Savik both try to talk to them but no dice. Savik wont break her word to the Commonwealth and order the ships over to the mainverse cause they aren't Memory Omega's anymore (they all belonged to Omega and were given to the commonwealth but theres some political their about the influence Omega has and its a fun political angle I wish got explored more cause its like a weird inversion of 31 kind of?). Spock tries to get the parliament to see reason because his counterpart was big deal martyr hero and that still carries weight for him. They dont respond well and he gets called slurs (not kidding its described as people booing and throwing things and shit, wild). Savik gets an idea.

The Defiant team arrive in Borg Earth circa First Contact. The rift opens and the borg hold it open, they move in under cloak but get shot down. They dont fire cause that would reveal them as a threat and crash hard near the base (its where starfleet command was). Data, Lal, Bashir, Crusher, Sisko and Picard set out to go to the base and do their thing, leaving Worf in command to effect repairs. Picard starts hearing the collective even tho he's got no borg shit and tells the party but they dont have a choice but to proceed.

La Forge needs parts, so Worf, his alt dead wife and others go scavenging. They melee only and manage to get it all with only one person being seriously injured. Worf is hot for her and its weird for them but also not. She is also into Worf in the same way. Kira arrives at the Wormhole and its being blockaded by mercs because of the Dominion/maybe not just them. So they need to figure out a way to get in without being destroyed. Luc calls up Savik and is like 'we need reinforcements, Riker's off his shit' and she says the parliament is being shit and stealthily implies he should personally reach out to other ship captains, which he does after murdering a bunch of romulan borders. He also gets to yell shut up Wesley, which is silly and dumb, but ill allow it. Rene is basically being kept off screen for this adventure, but still shows up now and again to annoy his alt Dad.

The Borg boys reach the main base and find a way in but its chockfull of borg and the Collective knows that someone called Locutus betrayed them from the two drones that survived the initial time alter and assimilated the Earth. The Queen is interested in this, and wants to learn about Locutus. The vibe gets stronger as Picard gets closer and has a brief freakout but gets it under control. They get inside but its slow going and theres so many fucking borg, dog. Riker catches up with Luc and starts shooting bringing out Klingons to help, but Luc's call for help comes through and 11 other Jaunt ships appear and chase em off. Riker has a bigger freakout which everyone notes and is wild about. Troi briefly chats with his second and points things out stealthily hoping she got her on side before Riker pulls her away on a pretext.

They arrive at the final black hole and start scanning, quickly finding out its the place. Luc sends a ship (or two, cant quite remember) to rendezvous with the Defiant when it returns to the future. Present. Whatever. Its not even their universe or history. Riker has another freakout and slaps his XO which she uses to relieve him of command and send him to sickbay, he is pissed about this but cant do shit. Kira learns alt Bajor is gone from Dax, and given the collapse of reality and the heavy resistance that will likely kill them she asks for answers. Kira tells her whats going on and after a brief moment of coping, realises that its worth it to safeguard infinite versions of her dead wife. (She married Leeta based on their heavy chemistry in that one moment of the ep in S7 and then Leeta died somehow). She agrees to help Kira. Riker gets sedated and the Doc confirms he's definitely got two rikers in there. Troi goes brain diving using her own stuff and finds the other one so she calls in Tuvok who mind melds and helps her talk to other riker and bring will back to the front. He was aware of everything and needs to warn Jean Luc about something his counterpart knew. Lucky they're riding a transwarp current thingie to the black hole.

The Borg team get inside and find the command center of the beam, the old foundations the buildings based on let them find a way in but they need a distraction to deal with the heavy foritifications. Picard has another brain blast and realises that they're looking for him so he takes a grenade and a rifle to make a distraction. The distraction works and he realises the borg may have multiple origins due to failing to get a reaction from calling the queen by the name of the being that became the collective. The Queen disables his grenade and rifle and starts torturing him for information, not sure why, assimilation would be quicker but I guess she's cautious about a dude who she knows betrayed the collective?

Wesley rides a shuttle into the intertime breach to make a map so the ships can follow, he lands and sees the base and all the bullshit they're doing, including watching them destroy Bajor. He sees an older him who talks to him and creates a distraction which lets him run from the horde of Devidians. When he's cornered he sends his omnichron off to the shuttle and launches it back so they have info. Rene convinces Picard to go after Wesley when the shuttle comes back (the leave a log buoy for the other ships) and the small fleet goes in. It goes badly and they're quickly crippled. Luc escapes his ship with Troi and Rene. Wesley is tortured so they can replicate his traveller powers which they use to create the Time Ghosts and Time Snakes to his horror and send them back and forth through time to close the loop. Apparently this always happens or something.

Bashir and Data get in and take out the fewer drones, before getting to work. The fortify the room and Data and Lal stay behind to make sure things go off right. Crusher convinces Bashir and Sisko to go after Picard and they rescue him from the Queen as shes torturing his mind. They make it out but Sisko gets shot in the chest. Worf gets the Defiant ready to go, and Sisko dies with Bashir opting to go back for Data since he's the only friend he has left. Worf is right there Julian, dick move but probably for the best.

Ooph, a lot there, but like, its keeping me occupied, again dissapointed by the winnowing of the DS9 crew and lack of Voyager peeps. Like we got Kira, Bashir, and Worf left of our beloved characters, everyone else is either confirmed dead or likely died off screen because reality is falling apart. Feels like a bummer to not have Janeway ride in to fight time bullshit, especially since we havent heard shit about Torres or Paris since they were captured (presumably they died with Earth). Still, wish it was more everyones story rather than TNG feat the others. How will this end? will they succeed in retroactively erasing their entire history or will we get a fun hope spot. Hard to say. Find out next time on my Im rambling about star trek blog post.

[ahmiin]

Hi, about this:

__ its about the [repairing the racist stereotype set forth by canon]

me with yautja me with ferengi me with vulcans me with klingons me with goblins

What are the vulcans coded for? Im very casual fan, so i get the rest but... i have just see TOS and voyager

you havent seen the "oh hes chinese and his ears are an unfortunate ricepicking machine" TOS episode, have you? Thats what I'm talking about specifically, it also doesnt help that they did actually cast a japanese internment survivor as a prominent vulcan in TOS yet still used this as an episode. TOS was pretty much the opposite of racial sensitivity, mostly because it was literally the 1960s and things were still in flux then. also personally have issues with Vulcans also being a Jewish-coded race and coincidentally im pretty sure either Hebrew or Yiddish were used in the films at one point, but 0 effort was ever made to explain why Vulcan as a planet and society both knew hebrew/yiddish or happened to develop so many similarities with Judaism, nor were many efforts made to actually include Actual Human Judaism in Star Trek in general. Yknow, despite literally both Nimoy and Shatner AND Lenard having jewish roots.

I think Star Trek- Picard was the only lore to actually establish Vulcans visited earth prior to "First Contact", which is kind of clownish. Like, why does Star Trek Picard have to carry the ENTIRE star trek franchise on its back? Why isnt anyone else making an effort? geez.

[yeoldenoodle]

We watching ST ENT Acquisition, and have a few questions and lingering comments/observations:

Can someone tell me why Trip is just walking around in his blues in a cold space ship for most of this episode? Are we supposed to oogle or ??

And why do we have Krem (the blessed Mr. Jeffery Combs) being an absolute delight of a ferengi with Cap. Archer??? Who decided this was needed? (I must thank them.)

And WHY are they making T'pol do sexy things to further the plot? (Again?) I mean flaunt it girl, she totally can own herself and kick some ass- but like the comments w/archer? Honey he's handcuffed... It's ok if your blissfully unaware of what your lines are insinuating, just chill* (*chill is directed at Berman&Braga's demonic need to sexualize her)

WHY WOULD YOU PUT PORTHOS IN A BOX

brb crying and calling the space police on this episode

#star trek enterprise #acquisition #first contact of the ferengi kind #lol this is such a banger of an episode i love it #jeffery combs is such a delightful actor #everyone is so fucking cool #trip not giving a fuck #tpol not giving a fuck #archer not giving a fuck #damn i love it when actors have to act while they are acting 😍 #charles trip tucker #trip #t'pol #captain jonathan archer #AND DONT FORGET ABOUT PORTHOS BEING IN A BOX FOR HOURS #im sorry porthos bb #porthos #noodleposts

[weyounbathwater]

What about snart?

SNART

Ok so his backstory is a little long so I'll put the lengthy version under a cut But long story short he's my ex-Borg Ferengi oc who works as an engineer/waiter at Quark's and I love him too much. Here's a drawing of him I'm working on too:

[Image: a digital drawing of Snart, a thin Ferengi man with a pointy face and two Borg implants above and below his left eye, plus two notches in his right ear. The drawing is dark blue lineart on a purple background]

Snart's backstory technically begins when he meets his first boyfriend (who I haven't actually named yet). This boyfriend is very rich and tells Snart that he can live with him - as long as Snart does the cleaning and chores and pretty much whatever he wants him to. Snart doesn't really have anywhere else to go and he's a romantic little man so he agrees, unfortunately trapping himself into the relationship.

Soon enough, this boyfriend starts picking at Snart's income, saying he's too poor and needs to get a job or run some kind of business to make more money, and that they can't get married or anything until Snart's income is roughly the same as his own. Because of this, Snart desperately flies from one job or deal to another just trying to find the money to make his boyfriend happy.

At one point during this is when Snart gets a job as a janitor in a robotics lab where he met and befriended (@edgebug 's) Prototype Mobile Platform 2.7.

Prototype Mobile Platform 2.7 was built from stolen blueprints of soong-type android models. The first real intelligent Ferengi android. He was supposed to be the first of a revolutionary new invention: A Ferengi engineered to carry over two tons without the need to eat or sleep, the ideal worker. Plus, they wouldn't have to be paid.

However, before the project got truly underway, the FCA got wind of it and contacted the heads of the project to tell them "uh if you flood our system with workers who don't get paid you're going to fucking destroy this economy." The project is scrapped and all mobile platforms are scheduled to be dismantled and their parts recycled.

Before that could happen to Mobile Platform 2.7, Snart helps him escape and frames it as a break-in, including feigning symptoms of stun gas poisoning for investigators.

(When the android is about to leave, he expresses concern that he doesn't have a name and that he can't apply for jobs as Mobile Platform 2.7. Snart deliberates before giving him a name: Bot)

Because he was unable to stop the "break-in" however, Snart is fired from his job, leading to another huge fight with his boyfriend about how they'll never get married at this rate and they might as well drop their plans because Snart can't hold a job, etc.

This encourages Snart to reach further in his efforts for money. He gets into black market trades, interstellar intelligence, anything he could get his hands on that would throw latinum his way. Eventually he is contacted by members of a Bajoran mafia group centered on Cardassia Prime. They want Snart to negotiate a treaty with a rival gang for property.

This negotiation turns lethal very quickly. The Bajorans who brought Snart along retreat to a shuttle and Snart is barely able to escape with them. The rival gang chases them from the planet, crippling the shuttle along the way. The shuttle is forced to land on an asteroid just outside of Cardassian space.

Horribly, this same asteroid holds the remains of several other crashed ships, which is being looted by a Borg retrieval squad. Snart, along with seven of the Bajorans, are assimilated.

Snart spends a year among the hive. According to Federation crew logs and unofficial records, he was a very powerful drone, both in charge of and the cause for the collective's newest division: trades and negotiations.

It will be members of the FCA who finally discover Snart's whereabouts. After investigating an exorbitant debt, his last known location is traced to the Borg, where the Federation is notified. Snart, along with a few other drones, is isolated from the hive and disconnected.

Snart is sent back to Ferenginar after his stay at the Federation hospital to find his boyfriend gone along with all of their assets. He had moved on, sold everything, and bought a new business with the money.

With nowhere else to go, Snart scrapes by with what he has until he can afford transport to a space station at Bajor, Deep Space Nine. He is hired at the station's bar, where he has worked since.

(Eventually, the bar gains another new worker, an unusually tall Ferengi who doesn't seem to eat or sleep. It turns out to be Bot. They end up dating each other)

This is already long but I can't find a different place in the story to fit this in and it's important, Snart actually has another boyfriend besides Bot.

Decades ago, before Snart's time, a Ferengi looter's ship came across a vessel, dead in space. The only thing that worked on this ship was the cooling system, which was meant to support a race of beings from an arctic climate. Ferengi - in my headcanons - go into a state of hibernation when they get too cold as a survival instinct. Like frogs in real life.

The looters, including Krem and his cousin, boarded the ship in case it still held anything of value. They wore protective suits to prevent accidentally going into torpor, but for some reason they began to malfunction. The crew were able to escape back to their own ship, except for Krem. Emergencies made it impossible to retrieve him, so he stayed there for many years.

When Krem finally does wake up, he finds himself in a hospital on a space station orbiting Bajor. Another team of looters had attempted to raid the same ship, but rushed to Deep Space Nine when they found Krem.

After quite a few days in the hospital, Krem is released with minimal instructions. With an outdated translator, no way of knowing where he is or how to contact his people, he wanders rather aimlessly in the habitat ring, until he's greeted by Snart.

Snart is able to piece together enough from Krem's vintage dialect to offer to fix his translator. The outdated technology only trips him up a little, experience with fixing Quark's holosuites had prepared him for nearly anything. After he's done, he offers Krem a place to stay in his quarters.

Snart and Krem end up dating. Bot joins them both later. We call them the Krembort polycule.

#snart #ive long said that snart is more like a fursona to me than my actual fursonas are #ferengisona #communications log #gar-trek

[replicatortrash]

what are some of your favourite star trek enterprise episodes?

oooo thanks for asking me this lovely indulgent question! I've been watching thru season 1 while I've been laid up with a cold the last week so those are in the forefront of my mind:

Sleeping Dogs is very fun - good Klingon biz & a key tender T'pol/Hoshi moment.

The Andorian Incident and Shadows of P'jem go together as a little pair and are great Shran episodes! Lots of good Vulcan lore and T'pol lead in these. (I'd say Fallen Hero is a good episode too if you're into Vulcan lore)

Shuttlepod One is essential for the Trip/Malcolm shippers and is just a great little bottle episode where these two get to become friends over a life or death situation. That formula gets me every time.

Acquisition! Ferengi episode! Jeffery Combs and Ethan Phillips play ferengi who try to rob Enterprise & chaos ensues. Bonus: Trip spends half the episode in his little blue undies!

Rogue Planet and Vox Sola both feel like classic trek to me - cool alien creatures someone has to communicate with to save the day. Vox Sola also has great T'pol/Hoshi moments and Hoshi gets to work her magic.

Two Days and Two Nights is funny. it's Enterprise's Risa episode so hijinks ensue, plus fun outfits, new sets, & cool background aliens.

Season 2:

Carbon Creek my beloved. T'pol tells the story of how Vulcans invented Velcro on Earth, or I suppose rather, the real first contact. A great Vulcan episode and such a sweet story. Great to see Jolene Blalock in real clothes also.

Ok I know everyone hates A Night In Sickbay but I love all the Phlox backstory and getting to know him in this episode, plus the dream sequence is bonkers. The total lack of sexual tension between T'pol and Archer also lands very funny to me, so it gets a pass on my list. Plus you get the follow up to the incident in Vox Sola with the insult to the Kreetassans and you get to hear the single best line in Enterprise, "this is Porthos! my beagle! my pal!"

This is as far as I've gotten in my rewatch so the rest will be kind of sparse...

I like The Catwalk cuz oooo that ship feels small & I love the potential energy of people stuck in small places together.

Dawn has Trip sweating thru a tank top and trying to communicate with an alien to survive on a desert planet together. Great star trek.

First Flight is a good flashback Trip & Archer besties episode.

Season 3

Impulse is like a zombie Vulcan episode which is very fun.

North Star gives us a cowboy episode, what's not to love!

Doctor's Orders is possibly the best Phlox episode and I love him so. He has to take care of the crew while they're all asleep to get thru some anomaly that doesn't effect him & it is SO good.

Similitude has a rapidly growing Trip clone - discussion of clone ethics, great scifi, and good acting. Definitely a heartbreaker tho.

Carpenter Street has Archer and T'pol travel back in time, steal a car and rob and ATM which is great fun.

In E^2 an Enterprise from another dimension? or is it their dimension? travels back in time so they get to meet their descendants which is v fun. Plus old T'pol of course. (I think Phlox should have been in this one as well since he's from another long lived species.)

Season 4

The Augment trilogy (eps 4-6) has Brent Spiner back with a vengeance and it's cool history.

The Vulcan trilogy (7-9) is some of the best Vulcan lore out there and such a treat to see T'pol wrestle with her culture.

Observer Effect has Malcolm and Travis possessed by noncorporeal aliens to observe Trip & Hoshi who are infected with a virus. Great classic trek vibes and fun acting.

The Andorian trilogy (12-14) is a blast. Great Andorian lore and Shran of course but also fun Trip/Malcolm biz plus twists & turns!

Okay this got out of hand, but I genuinely love this show. I love how small the ship feels and their astronaut looking jumpsuits and how the time period bridges the gap between our current day experience of space exploration and that TNG era we're all so familiar with. It feels hopeful and attainable and yes it's riddled with 9/11 era sentiment and America-centric ideology, but there's great scifi here too and I fell in love with these characters. These are just my highlights and I think @jonathanarcher has a couple different episode guides if you're looking to hop skip your way thru the series with some kind of coherence. Let me know what you think! 💗

#wow this got long #I love enterprise #sorry it's not quite in episode order #my brain is garbled #enterprise highlights #st ent #star trek enterprise #star trek #best of list #my favs #ask #faith of the heart #long post

[sshbpodcast]

Top 3 Star Trek Voyager alien races

By Ames

Now that we’re almost back in the Alpha Quadrant, we at A Star to Steer Her By have got a little time to reflect back on our time in the Delta Quadrant. As we saw in our two recent posts, we made a lot of really fascinating friends and really diabolical enemies, but possibly the most refreshing thing about being so far from the familiar faces of home is just how many unfamiliar faces we get to meet! Truly, the aliens we meet 70,000 light years from home are simultaneously wildly varied and also bear the same resemblances to the kinds of people that are truly universal, in every respect of the word.

And sure, the show goes out of its way to introduce some of the staple alien races we know from the other shows, sometimes in more contrived ways than others. But in my humble opinion, it’s when we meet these unique races that are like nothing else that the show really shines. So let’s whip out our First Contact handbook, try not to break the Prime Directive too much, and meet our favorite alien races from Voyager as you scroll on below or listen to this week’s triple-header episode (discussion starts at 1:22:56). Live long and prosper!

[Images © CBS/Paramount]

Jake – More than meets the eye

Vidiians

Species 8472

Voth

These three alien races prove to be more than they seem, as Jake tends to spotlight characters who surprise you with their hidden depths. The Vidiians may be pushed to forcible organ harvesting to survive, but they become fascinating when you see that not all of them are ruthless. Everything about Species 8472 is cool: they live in fluidic space, their bio-ships take out Borg cubes, AND they adapt enough to disguise themselves as Starfleet! Finally, the Voth are freakin’ dinosaurs! What’s not to love about that Galileo allegory story? Rawr!

—

Caitlin – Best friends forever!

Talaxians

Ocampans

Hirogens

It may have taken a while, but even Caitlin’s heart was melted by the hardy people of Talax, most notably their Starfleet ambassador who won us over through his consistent writing, never-ending kindness, and character growth throughout the seasons. Another familiar face came in the Ocampans, whose contrast between their short lives and potential for supernatural powers made them phenoms (when the writers remembered). And while they never made it to the point of allies, we still enjoyed seeing the variety of Hirogens we met, especially J.G. Hertzler’s Tsunkatse fighter! 

—

Ames – Pour one out for…

Vidiians

Borg

Silver Blood Duplicates

My three picks all make you empathize with them because Voyager shows you such a multifaceted and complete picture of their society. Like Jake, I’m shining some spotlight on our Phage-riddled friends whose actions you can’t help but be both sympathetic for and horrified by. I’ll also always put Borg on my list evidently because every new thing we learn about their nature has me transfixed. And the doppel-crew from “Course: Oblivion” create such an effective story and such an original take on an alien race that I just had to include them.

—

Chris – There’s a little rebel in you

Borg

Takarians

Vidiians

Something I’ve noticed about Chris’s favorites is he always loves it when the little guy fights back. We see so many sides of the Borg and yet we are always engaged by them, especially when it becomes a theme that humanity can be brought back to those who resist. It was also easy to side with the Takarians from “False Profits” because they were so quick to immolate the Ferengi (who can blame them?). And here’s a little more love for the Vidiians, especially Danara Pel who proves there can still be humanity underneath a monster face.

— Say good-bye to some of our favorites as we leave them in the dust in the Delta Quadrant where they’ll be no tribble at all. We’ve only got one more episode of Voyager left in our watch-through over on the podcast, so don’t miss our final thoughts over on SoundCloud or wherever you listen and follow along here on the blog for our series wrap! Come in for a landing with us on Facebook and Twitter, and keep an eye on your organs. There may be Vidiians about.

#star trek #star trek podcast #podcast #star trek voyager #voyager #talaxians #ocampans #vidiians #kazon #takarians #voth #borg #species 8472 #hirogens #malon #silver blood duplicates #fantome

[startrekprodigyfan]

This is the kind of thing Trek is good at. They offer a gift to a new race of aliens, and the gift the aliens offer in return is just… a song. It’s so simple and yet so powerful. Everyone was so appreciative and happy to just have the experience of listening to their song. Under normal circumstances that would’ve been a perfectly acceptable exchange! If it wasn’t for the ferengi mucking things up, I dare say that this first contact actually would have been a massive success!

#star trek prodigy #star trek #prodigy #prodigy spoilers #spoilers #dal r'el #gwyn #murf #rok tahk

[t-rina]

Star Trek Enterprise Rewatch

1x13 Dear Doctor

Synopsis by Netflix: Phlox is asked to  save the Valakians from annihilation by disease. He discovers something about another humanoid race on the planet, however.

Phlooox! about to feed aaallll his animals. He is a bit like Newt Scamander

humming :)

and he eats… everything?

GETTING FROM THERE TO HERE

Phlox has a pen pal :)

aww, he looks lonely

HE IS ALSO PORTHOS’ DOCTOR THAT IS SO ADORABLE

awww, and Porthos can’t have cheese anymore :/

you’re telling me that there are no other species that have pets???

movie night!!!

oohhhh that one girl is there again! I forgot her name! something with C!

Cutler, right!

are they on a date??

Trip is crying xD

i think Cutler has a crush

oh yes she definitely has a crush

and Phlox finally caught on xD

they found a vessel! with life signs!

they don’t have a prime directive yet, right?

how do the Aliens know about warp if they are pre-warp?

THEY MET THE FERENGI XD what a great first contact with alien life

interesting how fast the aliean guy picked up on the hierarchy of the ship so fast

awwww, Hoshi is learning Denobulan!!!

is Phlox nervous???? 

ok her grammar seems fine but she needs to brush up on her vocabulary xD

Phlox is a doctor and he is surprised by Human compassion and the urge to help people in need? Isn’t that kind of like… what his job is about?

why are they not wearing any protective clothing? no masks, nothing! is that weird in general or is it only weird to my covid brain??

T’POL HAS CAVITIES???????

I’m losing it, this is so fucking funny 

also… Phlox is talking to T’Pol about humans? xD

oh my god the Valakiens are going to become extinct O.o

the whole Valakians/Menk situation kinda sounds… familiar

yesssssssss, we learn more about Denobulans!!! They are polyamory!!!!!

Is Phlox his first or last name?

is Cutler friendzoning him? Or is she friendzoning herself?

wow, Archer understands Vulcans a bit better now that he is in the situation where he could help another planet with their technology!

oh no, Phlox made a bad discovery

is Archer drinking whiskey?

“The hell with nature” excuse me???

ooh, i like this episode

so much moral and ethical dilemma!

FORESHADOWING TO PRIME DIRECTIVE

THEY EVEN MENTION THE WORD DIRECTIVE

how come Phlox doesn’t have a husband?

Denobulans don’t like to be touched :)

awww he’s asking Cutler out… kinda… as a friend <3

Rating: 6/7

I really liked this episode. I’m a fan of Phlox and it was great to follow him a bit in this episode, see things from his perspective as a Denobulan on Enterprise, in his position as an alien doctor on an Earth ship. It was also great to learn a bit more about the Denobulan society, that they are a polyamory species, that they don’t like to be touched etc.

Also how fascinating is the idea that there are two intelligent species developing on a planet and that one species is on the verge of becoming the dominant species? I think it’s great that they address the problem that a cure for the still dominant species would bring, that they would interfere with nature. They let Phlox voice his concerns, that he doesn’t want to get into nature’s way (bc you can’t just say “the hell with nature”, right? Archer?).

And i noticed again that they send the Enterprise out there for exploring without a baseline of what to do and what not to do. They had the technology for this mission so they sent Enterprise out there. In retrospect that’s maybe the most human thing to do: we can do it so we do it without thinking of the repercussions. I get why Vulcans tried to hold humans back tbh. 

#ash's complete star trek rewatch #star trek #star trek enterprise #star trek rewatch #star trek enterprise rewatch #st ent #1x13 Dear Doctor #trekkie

[professorabacus]

y’know vulcans having misconceptions abt humans in the same vein of humans have probably been shown having misconceptions vulcans is a really cool thing given the time period in which ENT takes place. Like it opens door to all the misconceptions and rumors all the other species had abt eachother, given all the first contacts and such, andorians wondering abt nausicaans and their psychical status, ferengi speculating about humanity’s history with capitalism in relation to their own. just all kinds of little things in regards to how everyone in this universe treats eachother

#star trek #ent #fusion #vinny!'s post #text #ent liveblog

[kiranxrys]

Alone Together Episode 2 Transcript

Okay, I guess I’m going to keep doing these for now! This is a viewer-made transcript of Episode 2 ‘Sources’ of Alone Together: A DS9 Companion performed on the Sid City Social Club. Again, beneath the cut, and again, please let me know if you think there are any errors and I’ll fix them ♥

watch: one | two | three | four

read: one | three | four

ANNOUNCER (ON-SCREEN): ‘Alone Together’ – a DS9 companion, Episode 2 – ‘Sources’. Jake Sisko is forty-four years old. He is now the editor in chief for the Federation News Service and living in the apartment above Sisko’s restaurant with his wife and their two daughters. Jake has clearly matured and carries the weight of the world on his shoulders most days. Nathan took over the restaurant from Joseph when he finally realized he could no longer keep up with day-to-day operations. Nathan continues to use Joseph’s time-honored recipes, but he still forgets to stir the gumbo often enough.

Jake first moved in with his grandfather when he decided to pursue his reporting career on Earth. The great thing about Jake’s father, Benjamin Sisko, being a Bajoran Prophet is that he can always reach out to Jake, Kasidy, or their son. Today Jake’s not-so-baby brother lieutenant junior-grade Joseph Yates-Sisko is an engineer on Deep Space 9. Doctor Julian Bashir has taken on a rather paternal role with the Sisko children, as has Professor Miles O’Brien at Starfleet Academy. Miles has even been known to show up with a bottle of the good stuff from time to time. Quark even keeps in touch with Jake, usually to trade information as much as checking up on Jake. Having dated a Dabo girl, Jake became a rather proficient Dabo player. Quark gives him information and in exchange, Jake doesn’t play so much Dabo when he visits the station.

[fade to black]

RECAP: In our last episode, Garak called Doctor Bashir to Cardassia Prime under a mysterious pretense. Unable to transport to the surface or access medical records from the planetary health authority, Doctor Bashir is at an impasse starting to treat or cure the unknown illness affecting Cardassia.

JULIAN BASHIR (VOICE ONLY): Mission log stardate 73712.6. Castellan Garak has brought me up to speed on the medical situation on Cardassia. A genetically engineered virus has begun sweeping through the populace, seemingly infecting at random. The source remains a mystery. My analysis is quite preliminary at this point.

JAKE SISKO (VOICE ONLY): Julian, is that you? I can’t seem to make visual contact. Please respond.

JULIAN (ON-SCREEN): Jake? Jake, I’m reading your transmission – standby, I’m trying to clean up the signal. Computer, apply a recursive algorithm to the bandwidth filter.

COMPUTER: Working.

JULIAN: Jake! I’m not receiving this transmission under ideal circumstances. Wait- wait a minute, there we go. Is that better?

JAKE (ON-SCREEN): Julian. [laughs] Hi. I tried to contact you on the station.

JULIAN: Yes, I was called away on a priority mission. What can I do for you?

JAKE: Well, uh, Doctor Jabara told me – the medical emergency, right? Is everything okay?

JULIAN: Yes, I’ve only just arrived so there’s a lot of work to be done. It’s good to hear from you, Jake but I’ve a lot to do and I’m a team of one – what can I do for you?

JAKE: Yeah, well, when Doctor Jabara told me I tried to call Kira but she was in consultation with the Vedek Assembly.

JULIAN: Yes, the life of a Kai is a busy one, but I wasn’t called to Bajor.

JAKE: Yeah, um, any chance that this has something to do with what’s happening on Cardassia?

JULIAN: Um… where I am is classified. However it’s simply a humanitarian mission. But what do you mean, what have you heard is happening on Cardassia?

JAKE: Ah, I have my sources.

JULIAN: Jake…

JAKE (LAUGHING): I just have a few questions, Julian. Um… you know me, I won’t take too much of your time.

JULIAN: The last time you had a few questions I spent the next four hours consulting on your latest novel.

JAKE: Yeah, well today I’m contacting you in official capacity for the Federation News Service. And… I’ll make you a deal. You tell me what you know, and I’ll tell you whatever it is that you think I know.

JULIAN (LAUGHING): Look, Mister Editor-In-Chief, you contacted me.

JAKE: Oh, well, you know you can’t blame a reporter for trying.

JULIAN: A doctor isn’t normally the most newsworthy source. The last time I was important to a story was when you were writing a profile of me, right before…

JAKE: Yeah, before we responded to that medical emergency on uh- Ajilon Prime, right?

JULIAN: Yes.

JAKE: I think uh- to be honest, that was the kind of diversion I was looking for for an interesting angle.

JULIAN: Interesting angle?! I’d just proposed one of the most controversial theories of my career – you didn’t think it was interesting enough?! Well no wonder you wrote about yourself! I could’ve explained the theory more clearly if you’d just told me-

JAKE: Yeah, well, you know honestly- you know this really wasn’t about Ajilon Prime and that wasn’t why I changed the story- the focus of the story, Julian. But enough about Ajilon Prime – I want to talk about Cardassia. According to my sources, it is on lockdown. I mean nobody is able to get permission to enter the place or leave the place, from what I heard. And you know Quark told me than Grand Nagus Rom said that business is horrible and he’s completely frustrated. But no one can give me a clear and solid explanation so I was hoping that maybe, you know, given your close relationship with Garak, that um… maybe you could uh- clear things up for me.

JULIAN: Well frankly I’m surprised you were able to get that much information.

JAKE: Interesting.

JULIAN: What is?

JAKE: Well, I mean a second ago when I was bringing up the topic, you know, you seemed a little bit uh- evasive. But now that you know what I know a little bit you seem that you have more that you want to tell me.

JULIAN: Not at all, Jake! I have absolutely nothing further to tell you, other than-

JAKE: Well you’re talking to the editor-in-chief of the Federation News Service, Julian – I know when people are trying to keep a secret from me so… I mean hell, you don’t know what I know!

JULIAN: You’d be surprised – and watch your language.

JAKE: I’m- I’m sorry, I- I just- I just called because I know that there’s issues on Cardassia and… you know, with you being coincidentally called to a medical emergency, and Garak being the Castellan of Cardassia… it didn’t take much for me to kind of do some dot connecting.

JULIAN: Hmm… look, Jake, I really can’t talk about it. Suffice to say, I’ve been called to a priority mission and understandably, I cannot comment on a mission that has only just begun.

JAKE: Julian, I’m not just looking for a story. I want to help. At least I- I think I can help. But I do have an obligation to the truth, and- and I will honor that.

JULIAN: Now that is interesting.

JAKE: What?

JULIAN: You just reminded me of your father for a moment. Had you said ‘looking for a damn story’, I might’ve sworn we were back in his old office.

JAKE: [laughs]

JULIAN: More importantly, how do you think you can help?

JAKE: I heard mumblings about an attempt on Garak’s life a few weeks ago. I had contacted him at his home.

JULIAN: He took your call?

JAKE: Well, you know, Garak checks in from time to time, but in this case subspace communications were a little shaky so he took a call from Bajor’s newly-appointed ambassador.

JULIAN: But you don’t even live on Bajor.

JAKE (LAUGHING): Well, wait a minute, I’m the firstborn of the Emissary so you know, all Siskos are Bajoran citizens. One word from the Kai and I, you know, I kind of landed the job.

JULIAN: [laughs] Well Garak must’ve been surprised to see you on the other side of a diplomatic communicate.

JAKE: Yeah, well, not that he let it on but he did compliment me on my resolution – I think his exact words were uh- [clears throat] ‘Truly the manouver of a Sisko’.

JULIAN: [laughs]

JAKE: Yeah, you know, I told him a source said he might be in danger and… he was alerted as rumor of a coup.

JULIAN: What did he say?

JAKE: Well, he didn’t really say much, you know how he does – he listened, he avoided my questions, he asked about my family, he complimented my last novel and he, you know, he redirected every subject change and then he got me talking about my dad so… I learned more from a rumor than I ever would’ve from Garak. I’ll give him this, though – he’s good.

JULIAN: You don’t know how good. Frankly I don’t even think I know how good he really is.

JAKE: Maybe not but… that’s where it ended, my trail was cold until about fourteen hours ago when I heard that you had left. Anyway, my sources in Cardassia had told me that-

JULIAN: You have sources on Cardassia?

JAKE: Yeah, I have sources throughout the quadrant, Julian, you know that! Anyway, multiple sources on Cardassia said that Garak was uh- hosting a diplomatic conference. He was still trying to smooth things over with the Breen and their trade agreement was developing some cracks, shall we say, along their distribution routes.

JULIAN: Cracks?

JAKE: You know, apparently some Ferengi merchants had sold a couple of Cardassian cargo haulers some second-rate transporter modules, you know, led to some major consignment issues and losses for both sides. They were crying foul, I mean it took some time to figure out who was at fault.

JULIAN: Jake- Jake, this is fascinating, but… what does it have to do with Garak?

JAKE: I thought doctors were supposed to have patience.

JULIAN: Actually, doctors make the worst patients.

JAKE: No, no I’m-

JULIAN: -oh, making a little joke.

JAKE: All right, well I- I was… where was I?

JULIAN: Lost cargo.

JAKE: Right. So the Breen, they weren’t going to get the payments because the cargo never completed the rematerialization routine and basically once they started the transporter sequence, something happened and they ended up with a bunch of organic and inorganic goo all over the place. Cardassians accused the Breen transport captain of deception and vice versa.

JULIAN: Neither race are particularly trusting of others.

JAKE: Yeah, well, that’s right. Um… Cardassians wouldn’t allow the Breen to complete their own analysis and the Breen denied any wrongdoing, so the whole thing is about to become a galactic incident, if Grand Nagus Rom hadn’t been in the middle of an audit-

JULIAN: An audit? Jake, where are you going with this? I really don’t have time.

JAKE: Yeah, yeah I’m getting there, Julian, just bear with me! So being the man that he is, you know, Grand Nagus Rom was completing his annual audit of Ferengi trade practices and discovered uh- the transporter modules were known to be faulty. They came from decaying annex-class prototypes that had been found in an abandoned shipyard. You know, the Ferengi, they came across this stuff and they started scavenging, they tweaked the old module transporter biomatter- I’m sure you’re aware that annex-class ships weren’t known for flawless transporters, and- and those were prototypes.

JULIAN: So you think the Breen tried to assassinate Garak as retribution?

JAKE: Yeah, well, that’s one of three theories that I’ve kind of come by to explain Cardassia’s apparent shutdown. But after this trade embargo, suddenly uh- I don’t know, apparently usage of all medical equipment is subject to state approval?

JULIAN: It doesn’t make sense. The Breen aren’t known for biogenic weapons, they use brute force, with rather advanced weapons technology, but I’ve never heard of any weaponized viruses.

JAKE: Hm… a virus?

JULIAN: [sighs] Jake, I really have to get back to work. If there’s nothing else you can tell me of any use-

JAKE: No, no- Well, just- just let me- bear with me… There’s two other somewhat credible theories that I have that implicate the Andorians and the Romulans.

JULIAN: Romulans?

JAKE: And Andorians.

JULIAN: The Andorians have nothing to gain from Garak’s death.

JAKE: That’s true but their beef is also with the Breen. You know, Andoria’s population and its fleet were completely decimated and they’re still recovering from the Breen assaults during the Dominion War. So, you know, icy moons are not exactly lending themselves to quick procreation.

JULIAN: Well, their colonies are also further apart due to the need for lower temperatures that still fall within the M-class conditions. Plus, Andoria is militaristic – they have great warships, but they don’t devote resources to espionage or underhand methods. Look, Jake, the last time you broke a story about Andoria, you found yourself in front of the Federation Council being threatened with extradition.

JAKE: Yeah… and my evidence convinced them to recall the ambassador before the charges were dropped. Anyways, the Andorians and the Breens may have issues, and the Breens and the Cardassians are resolving this trade dispute-

JULIAN: But the Romulans are the only species you’ve mentioned who have been known to use biogenic weapons.

JAKE: Would they have a reason to want Garak dead?

JULIAN: Well let’s just say that Garak and the Romulans have… past dealings.

JAKE: You mean his past with the embassy?

JULIAN: What are you talking about?

JAKE: Come on, Julian, we all know that he was a member of the Obsidian Order. I mean, he was working as a groundskeeper on Romulus for the Cardassian embassy. He never told you? Garak was no more a gardener than he was a tailor.

JULIAN: Actually, Garak is quite a good tailor.

JAKE: You- you know what I mean. He may be a politician now but as a spy he played many roles. I’m surprised he’s satisfied with, you know, such a quiet life.

JULIAN: World leaders hardly live quiet lives.

JAKE: Yeah, you- you know what I mean.

JULIAN: I do. Jake, listen, I appreciate your insights, at least I have a starting point. If you hear anything else, please let me know.

JAKE: Now that I know where to keep digging I’m sure we’ll be in touch.

JULIAN: Give the girls a hug from me.

JAKE: Julian, one more thing! Sorry, I’m glad you’re still there. [laughs] Before you go I want to say uh- I thought about it a little and I think I’m old enough to say hell now.

JULIAN: You’ll never be old enough to swear, you’re still thirteen! Though I may have some work for you later, I’ll be in touch.

JAKE: Work? A job? No I- I didn’t think I was any really much use at Ajilon Prime – I don’t think you would uh- have any use for me. I couldn’t do any much more than that.

JULIAN: We’ll see. Take care.

ELIM GARAK (ON-SCREEN): Uh, excuse me- are you uh- are you quite finished, Doctor?

JULIAN: Garak? Have you been monitoring us this whole time?

GARAK: Doctor, all communications in and out of Cardassia are currently under my direct control.

JULIAN: Well, we may have a lead.

GARAK: Yes, the Romulans.

JULIAN: You already suspected them?

GARAK: Oh, I’m suspicious of everyone, but- but Jake, you did confirm that specific concern of mine.

JAKE: I’m glad I could help.

GARAK: Indeed. I suspected that the Romulans could be involved. I’ve placed agents on several planets for reconnaissance – only three of the eight are still alive. Never send a boy to do a man’s work.

JAKE: Only three left?

GARAK: Now, remember, Mister Jake, remember, all of this is off the record.

JAKE: Yeah, as long as you’re in danger I’ll respect that.

GARAK: Even after my life is no longer in immediate danger, we may not be able to discuss this particular situation publicly. I’ll- I’ll let you know.

JAKE: Understood.

JULIAN: Garak, how were you able to monitor my communication with Jake? I was barely able to receive his signal at first.

GARAK: I know, I had to run his signal through the same encryption protocols we’re using – it took a moment to reconfigure our local systems to allow us to communicate outside of it. Although your recursive algorithm was a good idea, it never would’ve worked. The bandwidth filter has nothing to do with my encryption protocols.

JULIAN: Five out of eight operatives are dead?

GARAK: Yes, yes, acceptable losses – twenty percent. But this is a bit more, isn’t it? It’s a serious issue, and it requires risk.

JULIAN: Garak, Jake and I figured out in a few minutes of conversation, you really have to learn to trust.

GARAK (LAUGHING): And who would you have me trust, Doctor? An intelligence operative for an alien government and a reporter who shares his secrets as part of his job? Hardly people one should consider trustworthy.

JULIAN: But you have to trust me, Garak.

GARAK: Yes, Doctor, for better or worse, I trust you. But Captain Sisko once told me that the road to hell is paved with good intentions. We all have a weakness, and if it’s the right interrogator who discovers it, the information revealed could devastate sectors of space and destabilize entire worlds.

JULIAN: I never realized you and the Captain discussed philosophy.

GARAK: Well-

JAKE: I never realized you discussed anything with my dad. [laughs]

GARAK: The Captain and I saw each other from time to time – it’s a small station, after all. However, the uh- the good intentions paving the road to hell in this case are the secrets. Knowledge. People see secrets as being malicious little things, but they keep the peace. Secrets are both power and penalty. If everyone was honest, there’d be no need for secrets. If no one shared secrets, the galaxy would be a much happier place. But Doctor, you know the things I know, and in some cases the things we both know are the things we need to ensure that no one knows. Anarchy would reign and the order of the day would be chaos. Trust, especially for people who hold this information, is both a luxury, and a burden of truth.

JULIAN: I hate to admit it, but you’re right.

JAKE: Listen guys, uh- if you ever need to share some of that truth…

JULIAN & GARAK: [laugh]

GARAK: It isn’t, Jake, that I wouldn’t trust you with Mila’s recipes or even- even some wildly outdated intelligence data, but I know you have a hunger for information. And you also feel a great responsibility to let your people know of any threats, and thus, this virus, is a threat. Not only to Cardassians but quite possibly to off-worlders, as well.

JULIAN: Fair point, but Garak-

GARAK: You know Doctor, haven’t we wasted enough time?

JULIAN: You’re right. Jake if you’re willing to keep digging you can focus your investigations on Romulus now. I’ll do some looking myself.

JAKE: I’m on it. [leaves]

JULIAN: Garak, you said that you have holographic systems. An EMH. How sophisticated are your emitters? Could you create some scanning equipment at your location that will be tied into your equipment? By now I suspect you have a closed system like the one you’ve locked your medical professionals up in. Does it have medical databases?

GARAK: I suppose I do and I suppose it does, but… what are you getting at?

JULIAN: Well you were willing to transmit images – if I can’t do the analysis myself, if you had access to the equipment, well, I can at least analyse the results.

GARAK: You- you know Julian, that really hadn’t occurred to me.

JULIAN: Oh yes, well, you wanted the best.

GARAK: That enhanced brain of yours rarely ceases to amaze me.

JULIAN: Let’s get started. We’ll likely need standard biobed with an [uncertain] scanning interface. I need to map your cerebrum to see if we should expect any issues with reasoning. A portable retinal scanner too, will help identify any changes in blood pressure or possible sensory complications. The biobed will also monitor your cardiopulmonary system, which should give me a look at your heart. We may be able to slow the progression until we have a cure.

GARAK: It’s a good thing I had a PADD nearby, Julian – that’s quite a list. With no EMH to conduct the scans, it will take a few minutes.

JULIAN: Well contact me when you’re finished, I want to see if Jake has learned anything.

GARAK: Very well Doctor, I’ll contact you shortly. [leaves]

JULIAN: Jake? Jake?

JAKE (ON-SCREEN): Julian. Yeah, Garak had more than a few enemies on Romulus. There was a proconsul Mirok who opened- who opposed opening diplomatic relations with Cardassia at all. He was poisoned. Uh, subcommander named Ustard, who was the Chief of Staff for the Romulan ambassador. Ustard died in a transporter accident beaming to the Romulan Senate. And the ambassador, well, we all know about the ambassador.

JULIAN: We do indeed. But they’re all dead. Are you suggesting this is a vendetta from someone related to one of those people?

JAKE: Well, anything is possible. I’m more suggesting behavior.

JULIAN: I suppose. But Garak was assigned there – it’s not like he goes around killing Romulans.

JAKE: No, but it sounds more to me like he may have been ordered to kill Romulans… Did you ever meet a Senator Varak or… Vreenak on the station?

JULIAN: Should I have?

JAKE: Well, not really but, you know, Quark would sometimes sell me little tidbits of information. Now let’s just say, I take the occasion break from the uh- Dabo wheel and he would tell me things. Now one of the things he told me about was a Senator Vreenak, who apparently visited the station before the Romulans joined the Dominion War. Now Senator Vreenak… maybe- maybe he was working with my dad to have some kind of negotiation into the entry into the war… I don’t know, I’m not sure, but you know shortly after he would’ve left the station, he… he was lost in a shuttle explosion.

JULIAN: Vreenak also negotiated the non-aggression pact for the Dominion. It’s quite a chance of alliance.

JAKE: And he’s dead.

JULIAN: [sighs] I suppose it’s possible that the Romulan government, or the Tal Shiar for that matter, could be playing a rather long game.

JAKE: Garak is the leader of the world- of his world, you know, Cardassia is in a much better place now and you know, they may even someday join the Federation, who knows? We have a level of isolation to get over but-

JULIAN: Koval.

JAKE: I’m sorry, what?

JULIAN: Jake, I have to go – keep digging. If you hear anything else, let me know.

JAKE: I’ll be in touch.

JULIAN: Thank you.

[pause]

JULIAN: And Garak! If you’re listening, which I expect you are – medication, rest. I’ll contact you shortly.

[fade to black]

[CREDITS]

#ds9 #deep space nine #alone together #(i had to guess some of the names one or two times if you know a more correct spelling for anything do let me know)