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#first gif bonk bonk bonk
justdurgeythings · 2 months
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Get bonked, idiot
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f1-stuff · 9 months
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the way they both lean into each other while laughing in the last two challenges >>>
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They always do thiiissss 😭❤️ But I love how the last two were them trading off who initiates the lean...
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tinyfairyseb · 2 years
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2011 spanish gp moments!!
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omanatascha · 8 months
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(via GIPHY)
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offhandway · 5 months
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Chapter 1 of Like A Dragon Gaiden
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saltyground · 10 months
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The Triffids - Red Pony
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visceravalentines · 2 years
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get bonked
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litrallytyrus · 2 years
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i just know if i knew you irl i’d be intimidated by how joyful and lovely your presence is you just have such a good energy and it always makes me smile whenever i see you in my feed <33
bonk i’m going to actually sob my eyes out like 😢😢😢😢😢 THAT IS SO SWEET OF U 2 SAY!! i’ve been sitting here for five minutes rereading ur ask and trying to think of what i can say that will accurately express my SOFTNESS FOR U RN!!!!!!! BUT I CANT THINK OF ANYTHING!!!! SO HERE’s A CAT KISS!!! 💞💞💞
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kittenintheden · 2 months
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You Can Read Me Anything Part 2
*ELMO ON FIRE GIF* so that took longer than anticipated but you know. HERE YOU GO. (thank you for all the wonderful comments on Part 1)!
***
Druidic Tav grew up in a nomadic clan that recorded their history through spoken word and song rather than written text. As such, she's illiterate, and one charming-ish vampire offers to help her with reading lessons and a whole lot more. Out of the goodness of his heart, of course.
Then one night, she unwittingly brings him smut for their lesson.
Rating: E Word Count: 5100 words Content: illiterate Tav, Astarion being a shit, but also being cute, innocent Tav, suggestive dialogue, blood drinking, biting kink, first time oral, cunnilingus, fellatio, PIV sex, Astarion playing himself
AO3 Link
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Astarion cradles her head, palm gently pressed to her cheek as she leans into it. She sighs and it tickles his ear, sending a dissipating wave of gooseflesh down the length of his back.
“Are you done yet?” Tav asks, voice breathy.
He hums and detaches from her neck, admiring the clean pair of fang marks he left there. His tongue swipes his bottom lip so he doesn’t waste a single drop of her blood. He releases her and takes a step back.
“You…” he says with a lazy smile as he reaches out with a finger to boop her nose. “... are so delicious.”
“Ha, ha,” she says with an affectionate eyeroll. She spreads her hand over the bite mark and calls on her connection to nature, using it to knit the flesh back together and restore her blood supply. “Glad to help.”
“I’ll bet you are,” he drawls at her with a wink. “Thank you for the appetizer. I’d best go find myself a full meal now.”
As he starts to saunter off deeper into the woods, Tav clicks her fingers and lightly bonks herself on the head. “Oh, almost forgot.” After him, she calls the Elvish phrase Shadowheart taught her.
For the first time since she met him at the site of the nautilus crash, she watches Astarion trip over his own feet.
He catches himself quickly, spine unusually straight as he puts his hands on his waist and takes a few more steps like he’d meant to do that the whole time. When he turns around to look at her, her smile fades when she notices his wide-eyed expression. The tips of his ears have gone very pink.
“Wha-” His voice cracks and he clears his throat and tries again, tone painfully casual. “What did you say?”
Tav grimaces. “Shit, did I get the middle part wrong? It was tricky when Shadowheart had me practice.”
Astarion leans forward a bit and gives a shaky laugh. “Ah. Right. I must’ve misunderstood. What were you trying to say?”
“She told me it meant, ‘I’m pleased to have provided you a good meal,’” Tav says, reaching up to pull some of her hair over her shoulder and fiddle with it.
“I see,” he says as he comes closer, his eyes searching her face. “Could you say it again? So I can correct your enunciation.”
“Oh, okay.” Tav gives a soft cough into her hand and repeats the phrase.
Astarion is close enough now that she sees his pupils dilate the tiniest bit. The flush at the tips of his ears spreads down the edges. Do they always do that after he feeds? They must.
He reaches delicate fingers up to cup her chin and draw her jaw down, parting her lips. His eyes are trained on her mouth and that makes her feel all too warm.
“Loosen your tongue,” he says softly. “Once more.”
She tries one more time and watches his eyelids flutter, inches from her own.
“There we go,” he whispers.
His gaze shifts to her neck again and he leans down toward it. She nearly stops him, but then she feels the draw of his tongue over the spot where he bit. He punctuates it with a soft, barely-perceptible press of his lips. A kiss, she might think, if she were a silly little girl. Which she certainly is not.
Then he’s standing straight again, releasing her face and putting space between them.
“Missed a smudge. Can’t let it go to waste.” His eyes rove over her face. “It’s so very precious.”
Then he walks off and she’s left standing there, cheeks hot and chest uncomfortably tight. Tav continues to run her fingers nervously through her hair as she turns and walks back toward their camp.
Astarion counts out fifty paces before he ducks behind a tree and leans his back heavily against it, letting out a shivery breath. He puts his cool fingers to his ears and tries to rub the heat out of them.
“Stop it,” he whispers to himself. “Stop it, stop it.”
---
Near the crumbling wreckage of a stone alter, Shadowheart kneels in prayer seeking guidance and direction from her Lady. The darkness, the loss, the silence… they are vast and answerless. She opens her eyes and takes a deep breath in and out. Clenches her right hand, glancing at the ever-present wound there.
If only she could remember… anything useful. No matter. For now, it’s whatever path will take her back to Baldur’s Gate.
She gathers her components and packs them away, standing to walk back down the path toward camp. There’s a trio of crumbling walls that clearly used to be some sort of holy building and she walks along one, trailing her fingers over the soft moss overgrowth.
Then she turns round the corner of the broken temple to find a bristling, broody vampire leaned up against the wall with his arms folded, glaring at her with a tic in his jaw. He raises an accusatory finger.
"You," he says, the word hard on his tongue. "Are an arsehole."
She gives him a smug smile and arches her brow. "You're a bigger arsehole."
He refolds his arm and narrows his eyes at her. “Really think you’re clever, don’t you.”
The cleric shrugs and cuts off to the side to walk back to the path. “The goal was to make you lose your cool. Seems like it worked.”
Silently and suddenly he’s walking at her side, lip curling in disdain. “Congratulations to you, you managed to annoy me. Don’t do it again.”
“Oh, he’s testy tonight,” she says, putting a hand to her cheek in a mockery of shock. “Maybe you’d feel less the fool if you hadn’t been teaching her to talk dirty.”
“We can’t all be ice queens, dear,” he sneers. “Some of us are queens with needs.”
Shadowheart rolls her eyes and her entire head along with it. “You should be thanking me, then. I gave you your opening.”
Astarion stops and she keeps on walking.
“To what?” he says.
“To have your ‘needs’ met,” she calls over her shoulder. “I’m not the one who was teaching her to invite me betwixt her thighs. Have a frustrating night.”
Astarion makes an affronted noise after her, pouts a moment, and then calls back, “Your bangs are wretched, by the way.”
She throws a rude gesture up at him and continues onward.
---
He plots and flirts for three days straight before he decides to make his move. Tav’s guard is down, her shy little moments are increasing in frequency, and he can literally hear her heartbeat quicken when he’s near. If that’s not all signs pointing to yes, he doesn’t know what is.
All he has to do is, you know. Make the move. Which he’ll do. Soon.
Because she still makes the most sense. The others all adore her, listen to her. She’s the perfect choice of protector should his vampirism prove a problem to anyone. She’ll say yes. Of course she’ll say yes.
… of course she’ll say yes. No one denies him. It doesn’t happen.
… it rarely happens. Not as if he’d care if it did, this time.
Astarion rocks his weight onto his back leg, flicking his gaze up to see Tav kneeling near the campfire and giving the dog a generous belly rub. Before she stops, he goes back to his extremely casual reading. Standing posed outside his tent. Holding a book with the title facing out. Very normal.
After what feels like an hour, his ears pick up approaching footsteps and he skims the page he’s on, waiting.
“Is that a new one?” Tav asks timidly.
He closes the book and looks up to meet her. His close-lipped smile feels almost natural. Almost.
“There you are,” he says, dropping his register a fraction. “I was just thinking about you.”
Not a lie, actually.
She tucks her hair behind one ear. “Oh? Do I owe you something?”
He laughs and sets his book aside. “Only a bit of your time. I do enjoy it so very much.”
Tav quirks her mouth up on one side. “Yeah? You’re pretty okay, too.”
“Better than okay, I should hope.” He closely examines his thumbnail. “I’m… growing to enjoy the whole package, honestly.”
She doesn’t immediately respond and he chances a look up at her.
“Deer in the magicked light” is what one might call the expression on her face. She blinks rapidly and gives her head a small shake before she looks to the side, color rising prettily in her cheeks.
“Is that so?” she says, giving a tight laugh.
His smile starts to go a little toothy and he dials it back. “I’ve been thinking an awful lot about our last reading lessons,” he lilts at her, peering up through his lashes. “And our language lessons. I’ve been pondering over what other sorts of lessons I could offer.”
Tav’s cheeks go pink to red.
He leans in to speak softly, making her lean in closer to be able to hear him. “I like you,” he says. “And I think you like me, too. So?”
“So, what?” she blurts, immediately grimacing at her own outburst.
A giggle bubbles up out of him before he can stop it and he puts a hand up in front of his mouth to hide his smile. When he regains control, he lowers his hand. “So, I thought you might like to indulge in certain curiosities with me.”
I want to go down on you.
Astarion blinks the thought away as soon as it appears in his head, briefly letting his smile slip before he snatches it back.
Tav is blushing furiously, but she leans in closer to him nonetheless to whisper, “Like what, exactly?”
Elvish, rising like the language of his dreams: I want to drink of your fountain.
He gives his head a light shake, playing it off with a mirthful huff as he says lowly, “Like sex, sweet thing. Whatever kind you might be… interested in.”
Tav nods rapidly and hums, slowly leaning back and standing at her full height again, not quite meeting his eye. “I was pretty sure that’s what you meant, but you know. Better safe than sorry? Is that a thing people say?”
Astarion reaches out to gently guide her chin toward him until she’s looking at him. “Think about it. If you’re amicable, you’ll find me later at the clearing where you last offered me a bite after the others are asleep.” He chucks her under the chin. “I’ll be waiting.”
She nods once more, expression unchanged. “Yeah. Yep. Okay. I’m going to… see you later. Maybe.” Then she turns on her heel and walks away.
“See you later,” he says. “Lover.”
When she disappears into the dark, he blows out a breath, subtly shaking his hands out. That was a yes.
Right?
“Of course it was,” he snipes at his own brain.
---
Hours later, Astarion paces the moonlit clearing, fiddling with the cuffed sleeve of his shirt. The others must be asleep by now. He pulls at the sleeve. It feels too tight.
Should he take the shirt off? He should just take the shirt off.
He does.
Astarion glances around the clearing once more, noting the blanket he spread on the ground nearby. Not a bed, but you know. He’s okay with that, actually.
He clenches and unclenches his fists, rolling his hands at the wrists. Cracking his neck. Rolling out his shoulders. He takes a deep breath and forces himself to be still. Controlled. Practiced. This is an act he’s performed thousands of times. This is no different.
It’s not.
She’s going to come out of those bushes any moment and-
The bushes he’s looking at actually rustle and he jumps, whispering “oh, shit” before he can stop himself. He manages to put a smile back on his face just as the leaves part and a small doe takes two hops into the clearing and freezes when it spots him.
Astarion doesn’t move. He doesn’t even breathe. The doe relaxes very slightly, flicking an ear.
It’s one of the little black-tailed deer native to the area. He’s made a meal of more than one of them in recent days. Her coat is smooth and healthy, her eyes brown and clear.
The doe blinks at him and takes a step closer.
He gives a relieved chuckle and says, “There you are, Tav.”
“Oh, you heard me? Damn,” says a voice from behind him.
“Ah-” he yells. He tries to cut off the sound, but it’s too late. The doe spooks and bounds off into the underbrush once again.
“Apologies,” he says, regaining his composure and rolling his eyes to the stars above. “She was such a pretty little thing that I assumed it was you.” He starts to turn. “But I’m glad you made it. I was starting to worry you’d gotten lost and…” He finally sets eyes on her and loses his smile immediately. “... and you’re already naked.”
Tav stands before him without a stitch on, her long hair hanging over her rounded breasts and everything from the waist down on full display. He spots her clothing and staff in a neat stack nearby. Her whole body is flushed.
Astarion swallows. He’s seen untold numbers of people in states of full undress. This is routine. She caught him off-guard, is all.
“I… was I not supposed to be?” Tav says, hands going up to run nervously through her draping hair. “Sorry, I thought… you said sex? And then I saw that you had your shirt off, so…”
He holds up a hand and ticks up his brows. “No, no, it’s fine. It’s fine! I like it.” He finds the mask, the posture, like muscle memory. Slips back into the person in control. “You’re just full of surprises, beautiful.”
Tav rewards him with a bashful smile, continuing to comb her hands through her hair.
Astarion huffs a laugh. He can’t help himself. He approaches her with slow, intentional steps. “I had a whole catalog of poetic nothings to whisper in your ear, but looks like I needn’t bother, which is fine by me.” He stops in front of her, smiling his charmer’s smile. “So long as you still want to be tasted.”
He’s starting to notice it’s a good sign when the apples of her cheeks turn red. She nods. “I’d like to try the tongue thing, yes, please.”
“Good,” he purrs, reaching for her hips.
He pulls her in for a sweet, well-executed stage kiss. Most people needed about that much before they got to what they were really with him for. He pulls back and gives her a tight-lipped smile.
Tav looks into his eyes, her lips parted. She’s not moving, and oh gods, he’s going to have to lead completely, isn’t he? Ah well. Such is life.
But then she tucks her chin, her gaze going heated. The pupils of her eyes flicker, changing shape ever so slightly, and Astarion hardly has time to drop his pretender’s smile and ask before she surges forward and kisses him back, throwing her arms around his neck.
Astarion gives a surprised “mmmn!” as he stumbles slightly under her vigor, but he corrects quickly, wrapping his arms around her ribcage and lifting her against his body. Her tongue runs along his mouth and she’s nipping, nipping, and-
There’s a sharp sting on his bottom lip and he releases her right as she pulls back from him, hands to her mouth and eyes wide as saucers. He reaches up to touch his lip and when he looks at his fingers, they show a smeared drop of blood. He blinks down at it, astounded.
He feels a snap deep inside him as the monster in him, the hunter, stirs at the sight and scent of blood.
“I’m so sorry,” Tav says, dropping her hands. “It’s a druid thing, we can get a little wild, I’m really sorry, I won’t do it again.”
Astarion licks at the cut on his lip and stares at her face, his breath heavy and his shoulders ever so slightly hunched. He can see the smallest bit of his blood at the corner of her mouth.
“Do it again,” he says with a voice like gravel as he scoops her bodily up and goes to his knees so he can set her on the ground.
He lays his body on top of hers and she gasps as his mouth covers hers, exploring and hungry. It doesn’t take long for her to return it in kind, arms wrapped around his shoulders and tangled in his hair. He can’t even bring himself to care when she’s making it look like.
Murkily, his brain reminds him why he’s actually here.
Astarion forces himself away from her mouth and she whines at him, a sound far more animalistic than humanoid, but he doesn’t stop trailing his lips down her body until he gets to her hips. He rolls himself up onto his knees and runs his palms up the tops of her legs from knee to thigh, coaxing them open so he can position himself between.
He looks at her face to find her gaze far less “startled doe” and far more “she-wolf in heat.” Her tongue darts out, licking her lip before she says, “People really like to do this?” Then, “You like to do this?”
Astarion positively grins, his pointed teeth showing through.
"Yes. Though it’s a pity this is your first experience," he says through his feral smile. "Because no one will ever best what I'm about to do to you."
“O-okay,” she stammers, clutching her fists close to her sides.
He purrs deep in his throat and puts his mouth to the inside of her knee, the tip of his tongue tracing a sensual line down her thigh, toward her center. He holds her eye the entire time and delights when her leg twitches.
When he nears the crease of her hip, he gives her a sharp nip and she growls at him, bucking her hips. He runs his tongue up along the crease until he reaches her hipbone, to which he gives a firm suck. As she attempts to roll her hips toward him, he spreads a palm over her hips and applies pressure to hold her down.
“Shall we check to see how you’ve kept your garden?” he says, looking at her from under his brows as he speaks.
In response, Tav giggles and slaps a hand over her mouth. Then nods.
She drops her hand to the ground and shakes her head, murmuring, “It can’t be that different, I’m sure it’s just like…” She shudders in a breath. “... just like…”
Astarion parts his lips and huffs out his breath against the slick skin at her core, already shining with want and anticipation. The sensation is a warming one.
Tav continues muttering to herself. “Books are full of all kinds of nonsense, I’m sure it’s-”
He flicks his tongue right over her clit.
“Ah,” she yelps, trying to buck her hips again. He doesn’t let her.
But he does flick again.
“Wha-” she says, thighs jerking on either side of Astarion’s head. “Why is-”
Astarion presses the flat of his tongue firmly at her entrance and draws it slowly all the way to the hood, teasing with the tip before he curls his tongue in slightly and dips back down to better open her inner labia.
“Holy hells,” Tav groans out, her chest arching up and the hands clawing the ground at either side of her growing actual claws.
He gives her another lap before pulling back to smolder at her. “And here I’ve only just started,” he says, voice silky.
“Holy hells,” Tav shouts to the sky this time.
Astarion huffs a laugh against her and goes back down, playing her with highly practiced skill. Full, long licks paired alongside firm draws over the swelling pearl at her center. She continues to buck ever now and again, but mostly she’s gone near boneless above him, head lolling lazily to either side and fingers weakly gripping the grass on either side of her.
When her breathing begins to stutter and he feels the flutter of her getting close, he finally moves his hand from her belly back down until he can get the angle right. He places the tips of his two middle fingers at her entrance so he doesn’t surprise her and glances up to see her eyes flutter open. She stares down at him from between the mounds of her breasts, pupils blown wide.
She licks her bottom lip.
She nods.
Astarion slides his fingers inside her and begins to pump in time with the movements of his mouth. Tav goes wild, both literally and figuratively. The pupils of the eyes watching him go slitted like a cat’s, gradually dilating back as her teeth go sharp and a random patterning of fur shivers down the length of her body before turning back to skin.
He takes that as a good sign and curls his fingers inside of her until he finds what he’s looking for.
Tav bark-mewl-roar-calls into the air above the clearing, her hips grinding into his mouth and hand now that she can move them again.
“Why does that…” she gasps. “Feel… so… good?” The last word comes out a growl.
He’d answer, but his mouth is preoccupied and he dare not let it leave its task.
With his free hand, he pushes her thigh up and guides it higher until she can wrap her leg round his shoulders and he can go deeper. He feels the swell of her under his tongue, going harder beneath his touch, and he begins to trace circles around it as he continues to pump his fingers into her.
Tav’s entire body rolls, trying to get closer, to get more, to get-
She howls as the tension finally snaps. Literally howls, from the very bottom of her chest.
Astarion slows but doesn’t stop, continuing to fuck her through it as he feels her release in the palm of his hand. He’s gentle, taking a touch of pity on her as he gives her a few more soft licks before he leaves her, drawing his fingers from her at the same time. They’re a mess, as is his face. He sits back on his knees and looks her over with lidded eyes, a self-satisfied half-grin on his face. Then he reaches into his pocket to produce a soft cloth to clean up.
He’s not much of a planner, but he plans enough for things like this.
Tav lolls on the ground, her body fully returned back to humanoid form. All except her pupils, which continue to occasionally flicker across the animal kingdom.
“Oh, that was good,” Astarion says, brows raised and grin on his face as he wipes his hand down. “Even for me, that was good. You’re welcome.”
She throws one arm out to her side, then the other, and slowly pushes herself up onto her elbows, trying to focus on him. “Why doesn’t… everybody do that? Oh my gods.” She flops back onto the ground.
Oh, she’s very good for his pride. He gives a pleased wiggle.
“You tell me,” he says. “Or call upon your old lovers and ask.”
Tav weakly waves her hand through the air. “They were bad. I’ve realized. Just now. They were bad at sex.”
“Poor thing,” Astarion croons. “All better now.”
“Yeah.” She rolls onto her side and sits up. Shakes out her head. And starts to crawl toward him.
He instinctively leans back as she comes closer, breasts swaying as she moves. “What are you doing?” he says.
She blinks at him. “I’m going to do it back.”
He blinks at her. “What?”
Tav draws her knees closer and matches his kneeling posture. “I’m going to put my mouth on you back.” She waits a beat. “If you want me to.”
“Uh,” Astarion breathes before he shakes himself and gets his wits back about him. “I would like that very much,” he says. He tries to purr it, but slightly lower in pitch is the best he can do.
It’s been years since he’s been with anyone who even bothered to ask. Probably decades.
Tav beams at him, a bright smile that’s so sunshiny it nearly betrays what they’ve just done. She rolls up onto her knees and pulls him by the wrists to do the same so she can reach the laces that hold his trousers on. His arousal pulses near her hands.
Astarion blinks. He’s… more into this than he usually is.
He blinks again.
He’s very into it, actually.
His fingers go to join hers and together they make quick work of his pants and underthings. Gently, she guides him back to kneeling again as she curls forward. Without thinking too much about it, he reaches out so he can hold her hair up out of her face. She’s at eye level with his cock, inspecting it with the eye of someone all too familiar with all the things nature has to offer and completely unashamed for it.
Astarion swallows back the wanting sound that tries to claw its way out of him.
“Have you done this before?” he asks softly.
Tav peers up at him from her position below and bends her legs at the knees, kicking her feet slowly through the air. She shakes her head “no” and something frozen inside him melts. Best ignore that. That’s a future-him problem.
“You are adorable,” he breathes. He finds he means it in the affectionate way rather than the condescending one, which is alarming. That’s another future-him problem.
Astarion clears his throat. “Same general practice applies here, really,” he says lightly.
Tav licks her lips and reaches out to touch him. Her fingers on him give him a little jolt to the solar plexus and he curls toward her on instinct before he catches himself.
“Tell me if there’s something I could do better,” she says, simply.
Then she licks along the underside of his cock and puffs her breath out across it, much in the same way he did to her.
He curls in toward her again and tightens the hand in her hair.
She puts her mouth over the head of him and he’s enveloped in warmth and oh, yes, he remembers this. This feels good. This feels very good.
Tav doesn’t get down very far before she backs up again. When she pulls off, he reaches a hand down to cup her jaw and draw it down, parting her lips.
“Loosen your tongue,” he whispers. “Once more.”
She does. She descends on him again, relaxing her jaw and loosening her tongue, taking him down deeper and deeper with each pass. Astarion means to watch and guide her, he does, but instead his head lolls back, eyes falling closed, and he smiles. A real smile.
It feels so bloody good. It feels good and he doesn’t have to… he can just be…
Tav hums a little with him mostly inside her mouth and he gasps from it, blinking back to the surface.
Oh, that’s too good.
He lets her go a few seconds more before he tightens the fingers in her hair once more to still her and gently guide her back. His chest heaves as her mouth leaves him, a string of saliva connecting them, and Astarion shudders forward.
“What’s wrong?” Tav asks, her eyes wide and concerned.
She can’t look at him like that. That’s not fair.
He lifts her beneath her arms and pulls her up toward him, her face to his, and kisses her again. She happily responds, catching his lower lip between hers and nipping once more.
Astarion groans.
Hands on her face, he breaks their kiss and tries to collect his scattered thoughts. It’s all hazed over with want. There was a reason for this, they were supposed to… he was supposed to…
“Why don’t we…” He loses the thought and swallows. Tries again. “Let’s find our mutual…”
Words, words, words, where are his words?
Astarion hisses through his teeth. “Oh, just… sex. Let’s have sex.”
“Oh,” Tav breathes, lips swollen and cheeks ruddy. “Okay.”
Whatever he had planned, which was not much, goes completely sideways as she simply climbs up onto his lap, reaches between them, and holds him steady so she can sink down onto him.
He’s so wholly unprepared for the suddenness and initiative of it that his eyes nearly roll back in his head before his mind catches up and he grips her hip with his hand, guiding her as he rolls up to meet her, his hips rhythmic, until their hips meet and he bottoms out.
Tav throws her arms around his shoulders and immediately begins to rock against him, her eyes closed and her joyous grin on her face. Astarion is doing his absolute best not to completely lose himself in her heat, her closeness, her scent.
Her pulse, oh, gods.
Astarion rocks himself up into her with steady rolls of his hips, tilting in to press his open lips to her neck with a moan.
“You can,” she gasps as she rides him. “You can bite, if you want.”
He’s not sure if the words he makes are language, but he does know he’s biting her and her blood washes over his tongue and he drinks lazily, sipping as he fucks into her at the same time. His mind is so unbelievably, blissfully bare of anything except how good, how hot, how much, how full, how winding winding winding-
Astarion pulls off her neck with a gasp almost on the edge of his orgasm. Automatically, he reaches between them and uses all the wiles of a skilled lockpick to send her spiraling over her ledge a second time before he furrows his brow, slams his eyes shut, and yells out as he climaxes, his spend spilling where he’s still buried deep.
“Oh, fuck,” he blurts before he can stop himself, nearly collapsing onto his side with Tav along for the ride. He slips out of her on the way down and immediately feels the mess they’ve just made.
Another future-him problem.
Tav casts a very half-hearted create water spell that at least rinses them off. She drapes herself over his chest, dopey smile plastered on her face. “You win,” she says. “I see what all the fuss is about now.”
“I bet you do,” he says breathily.
He’s grateful she’s not looking at his face as he struggles to hide the worry pulling at his expression. It’s future-him time, and future-him is having a moment.
He just had the best sex he can remember having in… that he can remember. With someone who will still be alive in the morning. And he likes her.
Oh, hells.
He likes her.
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a-hazbin-reader · 2 months
Note
Hello!! I just loooooove how you write Alastor, this unhinged bastard 😂 anyway can I request Alastor with a lesbian, chaotic reader, who's always drooling over women (especially Alastor's friends)(read: Rosie). Toooootally not self-indulgent. Obv platonic pls!! Thank you in advance 🙇
- 🥀
Omg I love this SO MUCH
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Alastor X Reader Headcanons
❌️Romantic
✅️Platonic
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TW: TERRIBLE TREATMENT OF READER, reader being funny af, idk who is more unhinged, slight Mimzy X Reader, slight Rosie X Reader
Description: ☝️⬆️
First of all, he's gonna be your wingman NOT because he wants to help but because it's funny when you fail
Encourages your chaotic nature and uses it to his advantage, will not let you be caged
Someone beneath him wants to pick a fight with him??? Oh he'll give them a fight
*sets down an oversized pet carrier*
*feral animal sounds and vicious shaking*
Alastor opens the door and lets you wreak havoc on them, it's just too hilarious
All metaphorically of course
😳
They get you a toddler leash because you're always scampering off straight into trouble???
Alastor cuts it the first day Vaggie takes you out
*massive destructive explosive sounds in the distance*
"What the FUCK, ALASTOR!?"
Alastor: 😏
You're his favorite feral little ball of chaos
BACK TO BEING YOUR WINGMAN
It's amusing how quickly you change gears when it comes other women and how they enthrall you
He often gives you a handkerchief to clean up your drool, pushes your mouth shut when it's hanging open and grabs the back of your clothes to keep you upright
He does look out for you though
If Mimzy is currently in your sights then he won't let her take advantage of your attraction towards her
That greedy little thing will take you for every dime all while she flirts and toys with you
If you're feasting your eyes any of the overlords(*cough*Carmilla-*cough*Missi-*cough*Velvet-*cough*) then he'll straight up tell you no
Not him bonking your head sweetly with his staff before pushing you out of harm's way
Rosie is an exception tho
He knows she can fend you off herself if she really wants to but also that she won't really do any harm to you
Not that you're not very charming
Rosie just thinks you're adorable!! All the eager attention you're giving her! She could just eat you up!
No seriously...she could...you would taste sweet
No you're sweet
You're making her blush
And you're making her hungry
"Okay, time to go!"
So Alastor sticks around and looks out for you in those moments but he also thinks it's hilarious when you shoot your shot
Feeds you terrible pick up lines and almost dies of laughter when you actually use them
"Hey! Tie your shoes!! I don't want you falling for anyone else~"
"She actually went with that one?!"
Will properly fix your hair or clothes up before you go out on a date, he can't have you looking shabby
If you ask him for advice then he actually has some really good ideas for romance
It's just difficult to get him to give you a honest answer because it's so funny when you fumble a bad bitch
Actually, he does try to set you up with women he thinks could be good for you
"Fascinating, but have you met my good pal Y/N yet? She is QUITE a character!"
Alastor is your partner in crime and you're wingman but he's pretty terrible at both
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Gah!! I hope you liked this one!! I wanted to really get the little gremlin vibes!!
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austinsastrology8991 · 11 months
Text
> Neptune IN the HOUSES < How your DELUSIONS find you RESOLUTIONS
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Neptune in the First - You act so naive, and now people actually think your naive. But you hate it when people treat you this way, but your always swaying around and acting oblivious to everything around you, but ik its all a front, and people find you to be mystical and now everyone is entranced by this dance you make acting oblivious. its obvious its an act, but then the more you get to know them you realize its not and thats actually who they are, and you wonder why no one has bonked them on the head yet Neptune in the Second - you dont really value anything, you think everything comes and goes, and your just like a paper bag flowing through the wind tbh. But this quality of letting things be and go, allows you to be molded by life and that can be a useful tool for artisty, but man yall just give up easy tbh. also your voices are like ethereal - kiddd cudiiiiiieee Neptune in the Third - you guys talk like a movie character, and its never the villain but the naive protagonist who just believes in a bunch of bullshit. but everyone thinks your so amusing to lissten to and i suppose you are but sometimes you guys really are playing up this movie trope and well im done watching the same movie i want a re-cast. then next week you will re-cast yourself as a new protagonist and well everyone just loves to watch you be an idiot so keep it up Neptune in the Fourth - Your literally 'good will huntings robin Williams'. you act like you figured out emotions because you let them come and go, but when someone questions whats going on with you, you find a million reasons to explain why you behave this way, and why others do, whilst completely avoiding letting your emotions out because your way too sensitive youd rather keep it at them at a distance that way you can handle it Neptune in the Fifth - You guys are the embodiment of a amusement park. YOu perform a million different acts, and never run out of ideas on how to entertain. Very amusing to watch, but people tend to take you for granted since your always so fun to be around we just expect yalll to keep performing, and you can, but this eats you up inside. then you perform again showing us how you feel as usual, and how it feels being used, and well i guess its all good because you have a never ending source of material - yourselves
Neptune in the Sixth - IMO the real mvps of delusions. No one is as delusional as them but they dont even care because they have thought of so much bullshit and have found so much evidence for their bullshit that they now realized that what most people believe in is bullshit, so they just think everything is bullshit. They dont even give a fuck anymore because to them everything isnt real, and everything is real, they have trouble understanding reality, because they have seen things no one could ever believe exists Neptune in the Seventh - Hopelessly projecting what they want in the world just for it to never come to fruition. This is actually how they pull, so dont hate their game. but they tell people how they wish things would be, and people want to save them by showing them how the world works, or giving into their stupid delusions and pretending what they believe in is real. Kinda a lot to deal with. But they'll never admit that they act so innocent but then your basically taking care of a baby Neptune in the Eighth - They make the universe bend to their will whether it wants to or not. They will pull every magic trick they know to make sure that their delusions are not delusional anymore. And its impressive how much they believe in there imaginings that it does tend to become real, but i would warn them and whoever is around them; That their fantasies tend towards the dark. so if they want something to be real (and they gonna do everything they can to get it) they may or may not resort to black magic or some shady ass shit Neptune in the Ninth - They believe in god a lot, maybe too much to appear normal. They are the type to make up a cult and behave liek mormons and say it was the will of god. The people ive met with this are strange, and their beliefs alter quite a bit, and for some reason they always have met deities and angels. But they are so delusional in their beleifs that if you hear them out, its so far fetched youll get lost in them because your so curious how someone got so lost in their own religion you wonder if they'll ever return to the real world Neptune in the Tenth - They are openly strange. Bro dennis Rodman has this conj his midheaven and its just iconic really. These guys are the strangest most ethereal beings and everyone gets lost in their cult of personality. Always switching up their identity, they think reality is bullshit and well we are all here for it because yall do the strangest things and i just wanna watch what your gonnna do next. but im still trynna figure out how close i wanna get to you because being seen with you is a risk for my reputation, because you clearly dont give a fuck about yours Neptune in the Eleventh - How many acid shirts do you own. Its like your the public personification of 'make love not war and peace bro' and its cool everyone wants a freidn like you, but no one takes your advice seriously. Because your so lost in the make believe that you think your make believe can actually make someone make believe..... But like cmon how the fuck do you think thats going to change anything. WHen has 'peace bro' ever actually worked. do your charities or whatever but i do not see it working as much as you think it can. sorry not sorry. But i do love you. But get a haircut Neptune in the Twelvth - Your literally the type to lick your finger , put it up in the air and say 'yep it going to rain wednesday' then it actually rains wednesday. And your so cooked no one believes you (because why would you) but then it does happen and now eveyrone thinks your even more cooked because what you had cookin is a real recipe. Now everyone wants to know how you have your third eye or whatever open and now you just want to hide again lmao. Also incredible artists, i recommend you guys keep your intuitive insights to yourself because you are right a lot but why tell people when everyone is just going to question how you see signs rather than heed your advice
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🌸 could you maybe do a Bucky x reader in which reader clumsily hurts themself (tripping up the stairs, burning themself on a hot pan, nicking themself while shaving, hitting their head on a cabinet they didn’t know was open) and Bucky going absolutely mother hen insisting he takes care of her, basically going complete nurse mode with a first aid kit? Kind of “I can take care of myself” and “shut up and hold still” vibes?😅😂🥰
Bucky x Clumsy!Reader - Headcanons ❤️
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Content Warnings - Mentions of head bumps, cuts/wounds, burns, shaving, general clumsy behaviour.
**********
- Bucky can't help but giggle everytime you hurt yourself. He finds it an endearing quirk of yours, and cannot count the amount of times you've been clumsy throughout your relationship. Though, amongst his amusement, he never fails to care for you with the upmost of sincerity.
- Reaching to the top shelf of the cupboard, it was almost predictable that something would fall, likely on top of your head with a bonk. Familiar with your sharp squeal, Bucky would chuckle, whilst nonetheless placing a comforting kiss on your bruised forehead.
- You'd definitely burned yourself more than once, whether it be on the pan, the kettle, or even your hair straighteners. Hearing a splash of oil following by a high screech, the brunette would be up from the table in a flash, by your side with yet another smirk and a chuckle. "Sit down, Doll. I'll carry on." Grabbing a bandaid from the box, he shushed you as you protested, his firm grasp ensuring your wound was covered and cared for. "Nu-uh. Sit. I don't wanna hear it." His voice still light hearted, there was a genuine sternesss to his words, the soldier intent on having you rest.
- Walking into your shared bedroom, Bucky flinched at the sight of the blood tricking down from your inner thigh. "Oh Doll. You shaved again?" He would ask in amusement, already familiar with this exact circumstance. Fetching a damp cloth, the avenger would tend to the cut gently, swatting your hand away as you attempted to take over. "Hold still, i've got you." Kissing the dry wound, he would gaze up at you with adoring eyes, truthfully enjoying every second of such tender love.
- Intent on being your fierce protector, nearly every item in the house had been threatened by your boyfriend. The first time you hit your head on a cabinet door, the soldier vowed to 'give that piece of wood a taste of its own medicine', because 'nobody hurts his babydoll and gets away with it.'
- Accepting your clumsy nature was part and parcel of Bucky's relationship with you; that was clear from early on, the brunette unable to forget when you tripped up the stairs on your first date. But, admittedly, he would never have it any other way. He was happy, more like honoured, to tend to those needs. After so many regrets in his life, these moments of care were somewhat validating; a chance for the repenting soldier to finally help, to finally do good. ❤️
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sweet-as-an-angel · 1 year
Note
kind of stupid butttttttt- Koenig/Ghost with a cat girl reader? <3
Ghost & König’s Reaction to You Being a Cat Girl
Warnings: Implied Smut/Sexual Content, Scary Dog Privilege, Pet Names, Sadism, Masochism, Scratching, Mention of Objectification (Consensual), Collar Mentioned, Female Reader.
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Ghost
Absolute menace.
The first time he found out, he was shocked, to say the least, given how you managed to hide your ears and tail so well.
But he adjusts fairly quickly.
Sometimes, to get your attention or to get you to come to him when he can’t find you at home, he’ll shake your favourite box of cereal or call “Pspspspspsps–” until you come clamouring round the corner for your food.
He’s always twitching to touch your ears. Just finds them so cute and soft, and while he would never touch them without your permission, he’s dying to.
Sometimes you tease him and bonk your head against his side, give a tiny, fragile purr, and disappear into the midnight corners of the house.
But, when you can see Simon’s had a difficult day, you’ll lay in his lap and let him stroke your head, snuggling into him.
Though it’s not that you don’t like having your ears stroked; you just know that, if you were to let Simon do it, you’d never let him stop.
You’re always really warm and purr a lot, so Simon calls you his “Little engine”.
“‘Cause I’m driving my love van into your heart :3 !” – You say, absolutely oblivious to the cuteness overload you’ve just subjected him to.
Whenever you intentionally (or unintentionally) act cute, it sends Simon feral.
He definitely has a thing for pulling on your tail and making you cry.
Sadist to the max.
“Don’t mewl like that, Sweetheart,” he tells you, your tail in one hand and the lead to your collar in the other.
“Or I might just have to make you cry louder.”
Has a collar with a pendant engraved with the words ‘Property of Simon Riley’ made for you. But he only uses this on a few occasions.
He’d never make you wear it if you didn’t want to; he doesn’t want you to feel like he’s forcing you into a demeaning position.
His names for you vary, but the ones he uses in private are usually cat-related.
Kitty, Kitten (he uses this one unironically – he’s not chronically online so he doesn’t understand the implications), Kitty Girl.
He loves you soooo much, it hurts.
Scary dog privileges for the cat girl he bagged by being quiet and mysterious (unable to talk to you because he thought you were the most beautiful woman he’d ever seen).
He genuinely cannot believe his luck; he thinks you must be some artefact sent from the heavens to compensate for the trainwreck his life has been up until he met you.
He’s never felt more alive than when he’s with you.
And he’ll break the minds, bodies and spirits of anyone who tries to take you away from him <3.
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König
Has a tendency to talk to you like how any owner talks to their pets.
“Does my pretty little Princess want her dinner now ? Oh yes she does, oh yes she does !”
He doesn’t mean to, honestly.
But ever since he found out you were a cat girl, he just can’t help himself.
It’s second nature to him.
He also tends to treat you as if you’re much more fragile than you actually are, but that’s because he’s never seen you defend yourself (because you don’t have to. König’s immense size and stature has effectively made you the social equivalent of Chernobyl, in that everyone remains outside a fifty-metre radius of you when you’re with him).
If you sit in his lap, he’ll actually die.
And if you start purring–
He’s GONE.
The sound is enough to not only fry his brain, but send him to sleep.
Hence he cannot sleep without you. Which makes his deployment exceedingly difficult for him.
He looks for any and all excuses to pet you.
He’ll straight-up ask you if you want him to scratch behind your ears, and he’ll keep going until you start to feel raw and ask him to stop.
He loves you so much – he can’t bear to be without you for any period of time.
Which, given how you can be rather solitary in nature, leads you to seek out the most inopportune places to catch up on some sleep.
He’s found you curled up in the wash basket before now.
And on top of a bookshelf.
And rather than be offended, he was overwhelmed by how adorable you were, curled up into a ball of almost nothing.
Yes, he did take pictures. Yes, he does keep them under his pillow so he can look at them when you’re asleep or away.
When it comes to the saucy stuff, König tends to hold back. A lot.
He’s absolutely massive and he doesn’t want to hurt you, especially since there’s more of a risk of him doing so by standing on your tail or catching your ears.
But whatever fear he possesses vanishes when you show him how flexible you are. Which has led to some…interesting positions, to say the least.
Btw, he’s a massive masochist. Just a sucker for pain.
Definitely the type to intentionally push you over the edge so you’ll scratch his back.
You have much sharper nails than the average person, which means it’s easier for you to cut deeper without applying much force.
And König loves it.
He has a high pain tolerance so he can withstand the burning sensation of you dragging your nails down his back and get lost in the fact that you’re marking him as yours.
During moments like this, he calls you ‘Kitty’ more than your actual name.
Outside of the bedroom, it’s literally impossible for him to call you anything other than “(Y/N)-Baby, where’s my little (Y/N)-Pie ?”
And you always come running because you know there’s a big cuddle attached to the end of that pet name <3.
Reblog for more content like this! It helps creators like myself tremendously and it is greatly appreciated :-)
Masterlist Masterlist [Continued] Masterpost Modern Warfare AI Masterlist
AO3 Wattpad
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beiasluv · 1 year
Text
sully boys walked on you changing 😳
a/n: i am out of ideasss, lmk if you have some :) anyways, enjoy! :)
masterlist
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although the na’vis are not known for their coverage in clothing pieces, they have a time for changing things up.
i swear they are putting so much trust in their piece of clothing, like neytiri’s top is holding on for its dear life.
jake (2009)
“hey, y/n um- OM MY FUCKING-“
“HEY! JAKE GET THE FUCK OUT!” you covered your bare chest and turned away from him. “GET OUT! LEARN HOW TO KNOCK FOR MY SAKE!”
“so- sorry!”
“GO!”
“y- yes! going now,” he closed the curtain slowly.
“no peaking!”
stares a moment before going out the tent. he is doing that shOOk face before collecting his senses.
definitely smirking to himself behind the curtain
jake is definitely a sweet guy and a consent king, but he can’t help himself sometimes, y’know. getting those free views is not something he’ll see everyday, might as well take advantage of it.
he tries to kill his thoughts but those pictures flash over and over he had to beat himself to it.
definitely have to bonk his head to get some senses back. he’ll be so flirty at first, but he’ll become so shy afterwards
definitely thinking about you before going to bed. he’ll be a drunk person in love, imagining your embrace during the nights.
tails wagging and everything when he daydream about you.
can’t even look at you in the eyes for a week, i guess. he was so ashamed but he can’t help himself teasing you of it 😈
the sweetest boy 100% tho. he’ll even comfort you.
“hey, y/n, i know i can be a wuss sometimes but you don’t have to be embarrassed to me. I know i’m an idiot but you have a really sweet body, don’t think i am a creep, but i think every part of you is perfect, and i mean it,” he tucked a hair behind your ear.
neteyam
his father’s son 100% a flirty boy
“y/n, i was wondering- OH HOLY- nice views”
“SHUT THE FUCK UP, GET OUT!”
“okay, okay, going now, you should wear that more, or should i say i like it off,” he snickered behind the curtains.
“YOU- son of a- please, get out!”
he is so sweet about it tho. he’ll apologize afterwards 🥺
he’ll hug you whenever he can 100% and shower you with comforting words. maybe he can shower you with seductive compliments *AHEM*
“i know I’m an idiot, y/n, but you are so cute for me, and i mean it, okay?” “never let anyone sees you like that, because you are my little potato and mine.”
but neteyam being neteyam, he’ll throw out a joke afterwards like
“next time call me, I’ll help you change.” *wink* *wink*
he’ll daydream about the scene that flashed against his eyes, he wouldn’t complain about it. just basically dozed off in the middle of the day, drooling and everything, and people around him were worried asf. “tf is wrong with his dude.”
wanders to those deep dark waters that he know he shouldn’t go there. definitely cringe at himself and smack some senses back.
then he always learned how to shout before going in, which other people thinks it’s weird why he started doing it now, after all these years.
when he knows you are inside he’ll never miss a chance to tease you.
“hey, y/n! watch out for a handsome boy going in, he might see some views.”
“oh, shut up.”
lo’akkk
my boyyyy, he is flustered to the flustered
“y/n, i wanted to ask- AH- WHAT-“
“OH MY GOODNESS, please, get out!”
“I’m so sorry!”
his face is so red that people walking past the tent would ask if he is okay💀 he’ll be so flustered he couldn’t even answer them.
people got worried so they called jake to see💀
“lo’ak! what happened, did you do something?” he grabbed his son and shook him.
“no-nothing dad! let me go!” he refused to stay in his embrace.
“then tell me what happened!”
“MR.SULLY, HE SAW ME CHANGING! IT’S NOT HIS FAULT!” you quickly got out of the tent. lo’ak’s face turned even redder and his body’s temperature is rising rapidly.
the fact that, I am telling you, jake died laughing inside. he was like- “HUH” and then “HAHAHSHSHHA”
lo’ak couldn’t be more embarrassed, but he was met with your comforting words later on. you went to see him in his tent alone, choosing wisely to bring a shawl to cover your shoulder
“hey, lo’ak, are you feeling better?” you placed your hand on his shoulder. “look, i’m sorry-“
“no, please, i should be the one apologizing,” he turned to look at you, instinctively looking down first but panicked and looked up. “I’m sorry for reacting like that, your body made me think things i never imagined- BRAH EW WHAT DID I JUST SAY.”
“it’s okay,” you giggled. “glad i can help.”
“NO- I SWEAR I AM NOT A CREEP!”
“YOU ARE MY CREEPER,” a peck on his lips. muah.
today’s a great day to try something new! and take care! 🤍
@rosaryos / @bumblinbumblvee / @loudcolorwolfgarden / @nyotamalfoy / @fangirl-2610 / @astablacksword / @lokisblueskin
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satorusugurugurl · 9 days
Note
Hiii i just saw your accidentally hurting during yk what fic 😭😭 I was wondering if you’d maybe be up to writing a sequel? Like what happens after that?
NO PRESSURE OFCCC
you have great writing
Aftermath of JJK Men TQ Accidentally Hurting You During Smexy Time!
Part One
Character: Gojo Satoru, Geto Suguru, Nanami Kento, Choso Kamo
Warnings: Mentions of injuries? Suggestive, Gojo getting picked on, fluffy sweetness!!
Word count: 2,695
A/N: This was so much fun! It practically wrote itself! Thank you Nonnie!!
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Gojo Satoru:
“My head hurts!” Gojo complained as he walked back into your room. He tossed you an ice pack before collapsing onto the bed with you. “Maybe we should have stopped what we were doing because I think I have a concussion.”
“You're such a big baby.” You giggled, still naked under the sheets. “It was just forehead bonk.”
“One that could have resulted in a concussion from your thick-ass skull.”
You tossed one of the pillows at him with a smirk. “You're the one at fault, Toru.” He just lay there, sighing dramatically.
“Right, I’m at fault all because I thrust into you.”
“There you go, the keyword ‘you’ all you.”
He stuck his tongue out at you before pulling you into his arms. “I would like to think it was a two-person incident.” You hummed nuzzling his neck.
“Besides, it's not like these things will draw any attention! In the morning, it'll be like this never happened.”
That was the farthest thing from the truth. The following day, both your goose eggs were still there on full display. You were okay with the fate you had been dealt. Satoru was fine, too, until he walked into the first-year's classroom.
“Mornin! I hope you three are ready for a fun-filled day of training!!” The three students glanced at each other before staring at Gojo. When none of them said anything, Satoru stole a glance at you. You had just stopped in to say good morning, and then you were off to the second-year's class.
You were flushed, hands covering your mouth as tears flooded your eyes. Why the hell were you laughing? Was there something on his face? Was his blindfold upside down? Your beautiful laughter was so contagious, spreading to his students. They were trying so hard to keep it together. While Megumi just silently judged his benefactor.
Not being in the loop had Satoru turning to everyone. “What? What's so funny?” The utter confusion in his voice finally had you losing the very little control you had.
“Oh My god!! Oh god!” You laughed out loud, sinking to the ground, tears flowing freely down your cheeks.
“What?!”
“What's with the lump under your blindfold?!” itadori cried out as Nobara slapped her desk repeatedly. “Some Charlie the Unicorn cosplay you're testing out?!”
“N-No, it's his third eye-opening!” Nobara added, causing you to wheeze.
“He already has Six-Eyes! That wasn't enough!!”
Megumi slowly pulled His phone out, snapping several pictures of the very confused Gojo. “Wait until the second year to see this.”
Having had enough, Gojo bolted for the bathroom, staring at his reflection. Without his blindfold on, the goose egg wasn't that noticeable. However, due to the tight fabric concealing his eyes, his goose egg was front and center in the middle of his forehead. He robbed at it, slowly smiling when he saw you step inside, face flushed. You were trying so hard not to laugh, but he could see the mischievous gleam In your eye.
He knew you oh so well. “Go on, say what you want to say.” He shook his head as he crossed his arms over his chest. “But Charlie the Unicorn and my third—no seventh eye-opening were golden.”
“I-Is that a goose egg under your blindfold, or are you just happy to see me?!” Laughter echoed off the walls.
Gojo just grinned his signature wide smile. He said nothing as he grabbed you by the collar of your uniform, dragging you back to the classroom. “That was weak! I expected better from my girlfriend.” You laughed even harder, making Gojo turn to smile down at you. He didn't think it was possible, but he fell even more in love with you at that moment.
Geto Suguru:
“Don’t ask Google Home, you freak!” Suguru just eyed you for a long moment. “Sugu—I’m serious!”
“Hey Google!” He shouted out with a smug smirk.
The next thing he knew, you were on top of him. Your hands covered his mouth as you straddled his hips. “You little freak! You seriously think I want PSIA or CIRO to know about how you bit my clit.” You were easily rolled off, Suguru laying on top of you, his hands prying yours away from his mouth.
“Oh, Y/N, I love it when you talk acronyms to me.” He gently kissed your palms. “So sexy, really get my cock throbbing.” You sputtered and looked off as a warm breeze flowed through the room. Suguru grinned against your hand. You were so cute when you pouted like this. “So Google Home is a no-go, what about Reddit?” Sighing in defeat, you nodded, watching your boyfriend type on his phone. “I, twenty-seven male, bit my girlfriend's clit. What should I do to treat it?”
God, you could already hear the cringy TikTok videos using your horror story for views. Luckily, Suguru got the answer: antibacterial soap, warm water, and aspirin.
Suguru left and returned, finding you sitting on the couch, your hand pressing against yourself through your shorts. The sight made him cringe in sympathetic pain. He bit you hard, and he knew it hurt from your scream. If he could take the pain from you, he would. Alas, there was nothing he could do to change it, but he could help ease the pain.
“I got the goods.” He announced, holding up a plastic bag. “Let’s go get ya’ in the shower.”
You stripped out of your clothes, standing naked in the bathroom as Suguru started running the water. Seeing him so attentive like this made you swoon. You truly were lucky to have found someone as kind as him. Suguru made you feel special, like royalty, aside from the whole biting of your clit.
“Alright, there's the soap, unscented per Reddit.” He placed the white bar of soap in your hand. “The fluffiest wash cloth the store had for your perfect pussy.” a fluffy pink cloth was placed in your other hand. “And open your mouth.”
“Why?”
“Just do it.” You did as he said, and he held up a bottle of allergy medication. “To ease the sinus’.” He dropped the pill in your mouth before handing you some water. “Because the next time I come home and find you looking delicious in the living room, I don't want you sneezing when I'm going down on you.”
After swallowing the pill, you laughed. “Looked delicious, huh?” Suguru nodded, his hand reaching into his pockets as you entered the shower.
“Delicious, gorgeous, absolutely radiant.” His Words were as warm and comforting as the water running down your body. “It got me thinking about coming home like that every day, to you, with a couple of kids running around.”
Pulling the shower curtain back, you glowered at him. “Geto Suguru, don't you even think about proposing to me after you bit my clit!” Something flickered in his eyes, amusement as he cocked a dark brown in your direction.
“Okay, no impromptu post clit biting proposals.”
“Thank you!” You breathed out a huff through your nostrils. “Now hurry up and come get in with me.”
“Right, let me just put the ice cream away.”
Your head poked out from behind the curtain, eyes glittering joyfully. “Ice cream?!” Suguru walked backward as he headed into your room.
“Of course! I needed to get my girl a treat after I hurt her.” You watched him turn the corner. “Be right back.”
While you did a little happy dance in the shower, Suguru walked into the living room. Getting down on his knees, he wiggled the loose floorboard by the backdoor and pulled the small wood plank up. With a heavy sigh, Suguru reached into his pocket, pulling out the blue velvet box he had slid inside before he had hurt you. He opened it to examine the ring he picked out for you six months ago.
“Oh well, there's always next time.” The disappointment was thick in his voice as he put the box back in its hiding place. With the floorboard secure, Suguru slowly stripped out of his clothes as he headed back to you.
Nanami Kento:
“Fuck, fuck, fuck.” You cried out as Nanami gave you a worried look.
“Hang in there. Ijichi is pulling up.”
The sleek black car pulled up, almost making your dislocated shoulder feel better. It held the promise of relief to come. Ijichi got out, rushing towards the two of you as Nanami ushered you forward.
“I'm sorry it took so long. The traffic was terrible. But as soon as you called, I stopped What I was doing to head straight over.”
Nanami shook his head, grabbing the handle of the backseat. “No, don't apologize, Ijichi. We should be thanking you for taking us to the hospital.” You modded as Nanami slowly opened the door.
“Yeah, Ijichi, I hope you weren't doing anything important. Thank you.”
“Oh, well, I was actually taking Gojo home.”
Nanami promptly slammed the door shut. Staring at the dark void of the window. In the reflection of the tinted glass, Nanami could see the look of horror that washed over your face. This wasn't happening. No way, no way. Having Gojo here was both of your worst nightmares.
You stepped back, nervously laughing. “Ya’ know what! L- Let’s walk to the emergency room!” Seeing the opportunity you made, Nanami followed your lead.
“Yes! It's a beautiful evening for a stroll.” Nanami bends down, leaning into your ear. “Walk.”
“Wait! I-I don't think that's wise! Y/N, you're injured!”
You waved your uninjured hand at Ijichi. “Eh, injured, not injured! Who cares!!” The nervousness was as thick as honey in your voice.
The black window slowly rolled down, leaving you and Nanami frozen. Gojo Satoru poked his head out the window, eyeing the both of you with a wide grin. A grin you knew had a vein in Nanami’s head twitching. Gojo hummed, twirling his finger in your direction.
“Let’s see, wet hair, dislocated shoulder, bite marks galore.”
“It's not what it looks like!” Gojo was unfazed by your interjection, his head tilting to look up at your irritated boyfriend.
“Wet hair, hickies, the pure frustration unfinished ‘business’!” A bark of laughter sounded from the back of his throat. “I don't even need to use Six-Eyes to figure this out. Shower sex gone wrong, Nanamin~?” Nanami looked like he was about to throw a black-flash at Gojo while you blushed a darker shade. “No shame! I could give you some pointers if you want!”
Your mind tried to think of some sarcastic retort, but your thoughts were on hold as you heard the car door open. Slowly blinking, you watched a furious Nanami reaching for Gojo. “K-Kento!” You scrambled forward, grabbing his arm with your noninjured arm. “Don’t kill him!” Gojo was snickering, giving Nanami a shit-eating grin. “Let’s just go! Get in the car!”
Ijichi drove the two (three including Gojo) to the emergency room, where your arm was popped back into place and put into a sling. While Nanami stopped to pick up your prescription at the hospital's pharmacy, he glared at Gojo as he showed you his phone screen. He didn’t know why he insisted on coming with the two of you. The man was persistent, not listening, even when Nanami snapped at him to go away. With your prescription in hand, Nanami quietly headed back. He was trying to listen to your conversation.
“See, this one would probably work for you guys,” Gojo said, tapping his screen. “This way, you won’t slip or dislocate your shoulder, ya’ know?”
“Oooh!” The way your eyes glittered with awe had Nanami’s heart skipping a beat. “Oh my god! That’s awesome!”
“What’s so awesome?” You perked up, glancing up at Nanami.
“Babe! Did you know they make shower sex steps?! It suctions to the wall, and I can prop my foot up!”
Nanami trailed his gaze slowly to his blindfolded colleague, who whistled innocently. “Trying to corrupt my girlfriend?” He asked as he gently helped you stand.
“I’m just a friend looking out for my other friends' relationship! Just one slip doesn’t mean shower sex should be a no-go!”
Nanami shook his head, wrapping his arm tentatively around your waist. “Kento, can we get one? Please! I wanna try it out!” You were bouncing with excitement.
“Let's wait six weeks before that; give you some time to heal.” While you were disappointed, you nodded in agreement. This was time to heal, not to get freaky.
But imagine your surprise six weeks later when Gojo dropped a package on your desk. “Have fun!!” Was all he got out before you were shoving past him, rushing to find Nanami. Things were expected to be wet and wild all night.
Choso Kamo:
You stared at the mirror, evening your nose. Choso had accidentally sucker-punched you two hours ago. Having broken your nose. But what sort of sorcerer would you be if you couldn’t fix that? You easily grabbed it and popped it back into place with a sickening crunch. One that had your boyfriend turning three shades paler than he already was.
Your nose was swollen and a little discolored. You’d be bruised for sure, but you didn’t mind. It was like an unpleasurable hickey—a reminder of the fun you and Choso had.
The broken nose didn’t bother you, but despite countless attempts to ensure Choso it was okay, he still sulked. It was too long after that he said he was leaving for a bit. You figured he just needed some time to get over what had happened.
He had been gone for an hour so far, enough time for you to shower and crawl into the clean sheets you both put on. You had anticipated him to be gone longer, so you whirled towards the bedroom door as he creaked open further.
“Welcome home!” Choso’s heart felt like it was beating a million miles a minute. Your cute smile, the warmth of your voice, everything about you made his stomach flutter; no, butterflies, Yuuji said. You gave him the butterflies. “Where did you run off to?”
“I stopped at the store.” He offered you his hand. “Come with me?”
Choso led you back out to the living room. He motioned to various items: a nose splint, medical tape, and an ice pack. Then, there were all different kinds of snacks and candy, all of which were your favorites.
Your boyfriend never went out to clear his head. No, he went out to get you things to make you feel better. The compassionate gesture made your heart crawl up your throat as lights shimmered over your eyes as they filled with tears. None of your exes had ever done anything remotely sweet. His gesture proved to you how much Choso cared, how sweet he was.
“Oh no, why are you crying?!”
“Cho—”
“I-I’m so sorry! Does your nose hurt? Let’s see!” His warm, frantic eyes grazed over the table. Hands were picking up bottles. “Aspirin, aspirin!”
Your slender fingers gently wrapped around his trembling hand, holding it. “N-No Cho—“ you were too stunned to speak, “baby, this is so thoughtful and sweet. Thank you, no one’s ever done something like this for me before.” The worry on his cute face faded into a more relaxed expression.
“Oh?” You hummed, interlocking your fingers with him. “So I did a good job?” If the man had a tail, you were sure he’d be wagging it.
Choso watched as you stood on your tip toes before petting him on the head. “You did a good job, baby; seriously, you’re the best boyfriend ever.” The wide grin on his face warmed your heart as he excitedly showered you all the things he bought.
He truly was the best boyfriend in the world. You must have done something right in your past life to deserve him. God, he was so precious! You just wanted to chew on his cheeks. But that would have to wait until your nose was healed. For now, you were perfectly content with him putting the nose splint on your face before he snuggled you on the couch.
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issa-pheonyx · 7 months
Text
Being Johnny Cage's Niece...
𝗜 𝗰𝗼𝘂𝗹𝗱𝗻'𝘁 𝗴𝗲𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗼𝗳𝗳 𝗺𝘆 𝗺𝗶𝗻𝗱, 𝘀𝗼𝗼𝗼𝗼 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗶𝘀 𝘄𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗶𝘁'𝘀 𝗹𝗶𝗸𝗲 𝗯𝗲𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗻𝗶𝗲𝗰𝗲 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗯𝗲𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗶𝗻𝘃𝗼𝗹𝘃𝗲𝗱 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘀𝗶𝘁𝘂𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 𝗴𝗼𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗼𝗻 𝗶𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘁𝗶𝗺𝗲𝗹𝗶𝗻𝗲𝘀. 𝗜 𝘄𝗶𝗹𝗹 𝗯𝗲 𝗱𝗼𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗶𝗻𝘁𝗿𝗼 𝗶𝗻𝘁𝗲𝗿𝗮𝗰𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝘀 𝗮𝗳𝘁𝗲𝗿 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗮𝘀 𝘄𝗲𝗹𝗹. 𝗬𝗲𝘀, 𝗜'𝗺 𝗮𝘄𝗮𝗿𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗺𝗮𝗻 𝗶𝘀✨𝗰𝗮𝘂𝗰𝗮𝘀𝗶𝗮𝗻✨, 𝗯𝘂𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗰𝗮𝗻 𝗯𝗲 𝗯𝗹𝗼𝗼𝗱-𝗿𝗲𝗹𝗮𝘁𝗲𝗱 𝗼𝗿 𝗮𝗱𝗼𝗽𝘁𝗲𝗱 𝗿𝗲𝗹𝗮𝘁𝗲𝗱 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝗝𝗼𝗵𝗻𝗻𝘆. 𝗟𝗲𝘁'𝘀 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝗳𝘂𝗻 𝘆𝗮'𝗹𝗹 [𝗥𝗲𝗮𝗱𝗲𝗿 𝗶𝘀 𝗮𝗻 𝗮𝗱𝘂𝗹𝘁 𝗯𝘆 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘄𝗮𝘆]🤭
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▌│█║▌║▌║ L̳͈͉̅̊ȍ̸̢̢̮͚̐̚v̸̵̝͙͆̈ͤę̷̵̧̖̫̗̆̊ M̶̷̲̊ͥ͋͟ę̷̵̧̖̫̗̆̊ L̳͈͉̅̊ȍ̸̢̢̮͚̐̚v̸̵̝͙͆̈ͤę̷̵̧̖̫̗̆̊ M̶̷̲̊ͥ͋͟ę̷̵̧̖̫̗̆̊ L̳͈͉̅̊ȍ̸̢̢̮͚̐̚v̸̵̝͙͆̈ͤę̷̵̧̖̫̗̆̊ M̶̷̲̊ͥ͋͟ę̷̵̧̖̫̗̆̊ L̳͈͉̅̊ȍ̸̢̢̮͚̐̚v̸̵̝͙͆̈ͤę̷̵̧̖̫̗̆̊ M̶̷̲̊ͥ͋͟ę̷̵̧̖̫̗̆̊ ║▌║▌║█│▌
-He is literally the fun uncle...with such dad jokes and puns that makes you double take on being his favorite. Yes, you're his favorite what makes you think he is open with you hanging around when he is in acting mode at work or he invites you to the red carpet to announce the winners for best actor (AKA him). Plus, there is a new game system you've been investing? He got you. Student loans? No need just tell him how much it is for each semester, he is very supportive of your career. "Is that your uncle Johnny fucking Cage!?" He is at the drop off waiting for you to be picked up in his red Lamborghini, blasting California Love,"Yup...that is my uncle."
-Speaking of his acting career he will NOT permit you to go to any film industry if he is not around. He will confront any sleazy creeps who dare to make you sign a contract, because you will be the biggest star like your uncle. Nope! Not on his watch. "Give me that. Who gave you this paper?" "Uh, some bald guy-" "Yeah, didn't I teach you any better talking to strangers??" "Uncle J you're not even my da-" "I'm calling your mom."
-Not only is he protective, but he will keep mad bugging you to teach you his martial art skills. It is just an excuse to have some uncle and niece bonding-both you hang out 24/7 it is ridiculous-so, you could be his trustee side kick and who knows if he ever has another movie coming in he would definitely drag put you in since you learned martial arts like him. On a serious note though he would let you know he is not doing it for clout (bullshit), but to make sure you are safe and know what to do in dangerous scenarios
-Of course, you will be bombarded with paparazzi when you're hanging with your uncle, however the pictures seem to have a unique pattern about you both. It is like a game between you and Johnny against them. You received little attention before your first movie with your uncle, yet after that you decide to troll them. Every picture they failed to take your face either you wearing a hoodie only seeing your mouth in view, surgical masks and not being to capture you pulling it down when you're eating/drinking cause the angle is shit. Or even then you would position yourself around objects or things that it just looks like a tree branch covered the majority of your face flashing a smile cause Johnny cracked a joke as he was smiling too, eating frozen yogurt going for a walk at the park
-Now being introduced with Lui Kang God of Fire, Sub Zero, Scorpion, and so much was mind blowing. Even you were part of it. Johnny being the protective uncle he absolutely REFUSED to get you involved. So, instead you had to stay close to him at all times since you were forced to join. It was quite a beauty since these different timelines had gorgeous views, so you would snap pictures here and there (without uncle Kenshi knowing cause he bonked you with the sword once). Plus, you were stunned how pretty everyone was there like holy shit why is everyone so hot???
-Furthermore, everyone was just as curious as they were with Johnny to you. "So, you're related to Johnny Cage?" Lui Kang asks as he was behind the entrance door of your uncle's mansion with his arms crossed,"Unfortunately, yes-" "That's it! Youngins' shouldn't be here. The adults are talking." The ladies were a little confused you can be the opposite of Johnny being humorous and all. "How can you tolerate such patience with an uncle so untamed, (Y/N)?" Kitana whispered to you after he told her she was gracefully aging for a 10,000 year old,"I don't know, princess. I question myself that everyday."
-Of course, your uncle J told you to be close to you at all costs, but you end up snapping when someone laid a hand on your uncle. That's when all that work of martial arts paid off when you were popping awf, honey. Everyone was shook and couldn't believe their eyes even Mileena complimented,"Such fire you show within kombat! I wish you can stay here in the Outworld to teach all my guards." You chuckled,"I would be very honored, your majesty, but I don't think uncle Johnny would be okay with that."
-Being his niece has taught you to enjoy life even when things don't go your way it'll get better. With you he learned that not everything shouldn't be taken so lightly when it is necessary especially to those he has a special bond with. Lets just say it is a healing and mind opening moment for you and you uncle away from the riches, the media, and fame into the Outworld
▌│█║▌║▌║ L̳͈͉̅̊ȍ̸̢̢̮͚̐̚v̸̵̝͙͆̈ͤę̷̵̧̖̫̗̆̊ M̶̷̲̊ͥ͋͟ę̷̵̧̖̫̗̆̊ L̳͈͉̅̊ȍ̸̢̢̮͚̐̚v̸̵̝͙͆̈ͤę̷̵̧̖̫̗̆̊ M̶̷̲̊ͥ͋͟ę̷̵̧̖̫̗̆̊ L̳͈͉̅̊ȍ̸̢̢̮͚̐̚v̸̵̝͙͆̈ͤę̷̵̧̖̫̗̆̊ M̶̷̲̊ͥ͋͟ę̷̵̧̖̫̗̆̊ L̳͈͉̅̊ȍ̸̢̢̮͚̐̚v̸̵̝͙͆̈ͤę̷̵̧̖̫̗̆̊ M̶̷̲̊ͥ͋͟ę̷̵̧̖̫̗̆̊ ║▌║▌║█│▌
𝗧𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗸𝘀 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴! 𝗜 𝗵𝗼𝗽𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗲𝗻𝗷𝗼𝘆𝗲𝗱 𝗶𝘁. 𝗠𝘆 𝘂𝗽𝗱𝗮𝘁𝗲𝘀 𝗱𝗼 𝘁𝗮𝗸𝗲 𝘀𝗼𝗺𝗲 𝘁𝗶𝗺𝗲 𝗷𝘂𝘀𝘁 𝗮 𝗳𝗮𝗶𝗿 𝘄𝗮𝗿𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴. 𝗦𝗹𝗲𝗲𝗽 𝘄𝗲𝗹𝗹~🖤🫣
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