GOJO SATORU: ❛❛ IS IT OVER NOW? (IT ISN'T) ❜❜
.ೃ࿐ streamer!au: all good things come to an end, including your relationship—but don't worry, broken hearts can be mended, but only if you're both willing to try.
contents: fem!reader. you two break up and make up! you guys fight/break up over something that coulda been resolved with better communication. kinda suggestive ending, maybe i'll drop a part two if this does alright. satoru announces your break-up on his stream. longest fic i've posted so far, 4k words (kms).
author's note: the long awaited angst has finally arrived.. big thank you to @screampied for beta-reading!! tagging @yunymphs who read it early and @sutorus + @kentopedia who i both miss very much!!
ever since you first joined satoru on his stream, it’s gotten way more popular than either of you could’ve ever expected. before he brought you onto his live, he was averaging about eight thousand views per stream. now, his average was well over fifteen thousand—and that wasn't even including the publicity he got from other websites. when satoru accidentally left the camera on while you two made out, you two went viral on twitter. and when another user tried to swipe him away, the clip got over a hundred thousand views on youtube.
at first, satoru didn't mind the change his stream was going through—in fact, he welcomed it. but lately, things have been… different.
last week, while satoru was playing in some competition, he won first out of hundreds of equally proficient players. had it been anyone else, their comments would've been filled with congratulations and good job's, but in his case, all satoru got were messages asking where you were. that wasn’t the first time—ever since that very first day, when you showed up on his stream, satoru’s audience has entirely shifted. and honestly, if you were in his position, you'd be a bit annoyed. anyone would be.
but you had never expected that it would be so big of a deal that you and satoru—the "cutest couple on the internet"—would break up over it.
you walk along the chilly, suburban sidewalk up to your boyfriend’s house. satoru had just sent you a message asking if you could come over, and like always, you answered with an immediate yes. a flock of crows fly by, raven feathers providing a stark contrast between them and the pale gray sky around you. it’s gray and gloomy, but not unpleasant.
a sweet, romantic song plays in your ears as you knock three times on satoru’s front door. his familiar voice calls out “coming!”, and you can hear his footsteps grow louder and louder until he swings open the door. satoru smiles down at you, cheeks already rosy from the cold winter air. “hey.”
you tilt your head and smile back at him. “that’s all i get? hey?” you huff, walking into his living room behind him as the door closes behind you. “d’you have any hot chocolate? i’m freezing,” you say, licking your lips. satoru turns and pauses, an unreadable expression on his face. “satoru?”
after a moment, your boyfriend snaps out of it. “oh, yeah, sorry,” he says ruefully. satoru rubs his eyes with one hand and uses the other to open the door to his bedroom, and as you follow him in, you’re hit with a blast of warm air. “i’m just kinda tired, but yeah, i have some hot cocoa in here. c’mon.”
“anything i can do for you?” you offer, sitting down on the corner of his bed. you’ve been to his house so many times that it feels like home—maybe even more so than your own place. everything about satoru’s room is comfortable, from his plush chairs to the faux-fur blankets draped over every single piece of his furniture. you could probably fall over at any given point and it wouldn’t actually hurt—you’d just land on something soft and/or fluffy.
but that wasn’t all that made you so in love with his home. it was just the way it felt—words couldn’t describe the way everything was just so right and just so perfect, and you really did hope that you’d never have to see a time where you wouldn’t be able to spend time with your boyfriend here.
it really is a shame that all good things had to come to an end. at least, that’s what you kept telling yourself as satoru finally told you why he called you over. unlike nearly every other time, it wasn’t because he missed you or wanted to cuddle—it was quite the opposite, really.
“i don’t think this is working.”
six words that shattered the life you had come to know and love.
“is this a joke?” you try, an unnerved smile spreading across your lips against your will. he doesn’t reply instantly, which is so out-of-character for him that it makes you stiffen up. “satoru, this isn’t funny—”
“i’m not kidding,” satoru murmurs, looking away. he refuses to meet your eyes, and some part of you is still desperately trying to find reason in the chaos that’s slowly taking over your mind. how could it be that everything was just fine two minutes ago and now it’s anything but that? did something happen? did you say the wrong thing? did you—
“it’s not funny,” you insist, still somehow clinging onto your slowly-dwindling hope. maybe you’re in denial, but still, you were sure that everything was fine—no, that everything is fine. there was no past-tense, right? how could the glass home you’d built with your bare hands just crash down at the throw of a pebble?
satoru finally meets your eyes, and your breath catches in your throat. there’s no amused glimmer in his eyes, no “just kidding” in sight, and even worse, you can’t even see an ounce of the love or adoration you’d come to grow so attached to in just a couple months.
“what happened?” you whisper, miraculously managing to keep yourself together. you’d never forgive yourself if you just started crying over a breakup you weren’t even sure was happening—what little’s left of your pride is holding on. you allow yourself to wrap your arms around your chest, curling into your own embrace.
satoru doesn’t reply for a long second. right when you’re sure he just won’t reply, he does, and it all comes spilling out in a messy stream of words. “it’s just… i can’t do this anymore. i can’t keep going online and seeing everyone on my stream talking about you. i love you, i really do, but it’s just—” satoru shakes his head frustratedly. “i don’t know how to say it, but you know what i mean, right?”
your eyebrows furrow and you shake your head. “you’re breaking up with me because you’re tired of seeing me?”
“no, fuck,” satoru groans, running a hand through his hair. his previously cool and collected demeanor starts to fall apart as he takes a step back. “i don’t know how to explain it, but— shit, you wouldn’t understand.”
you swallow and start to stand up, still willing to try. “then help me understand, satoru, i—”
“you’ve seen the comments, and you’ve seen all the posts on twitter,” satoru says, tilting his head back and glaring at the ceiling. “it’s not your fault, but i really just can’t stand everyone disregarding me and turning my own stream into a youtube channel starring you.”
his words sting like alcohol in an open wound, and you fight the battle of your life to prevent the thousands of tears hiding behind your eyes from being visible. even so, your voice wobbles ever so slightly as you say “that’s a bullshit reason to break up, satoru—”
your boyfriend—is he even still your boyfriend?—scoffs and shakes his head, stumbling back and falling into his chair. "for you, it isn't. you wouldn’t understand. for me, it's like everyone's just... invalidating the three years i've spent on this shit. and i can't do it anymore, i just can't."
you blink slowly, backing away towards his bedroom door. "what does that mean?"
satoru exhales a bitter laugh and turns away, the back of his chair facing you. you think you can hear him take a soft, shaky breath as the room falls silent. neither of you make a sound before satoru turns back toward you, a blank look on his face.
he looks up at you, azure eyes devoid of the sparkle you've become so familiar with. satoru smiles sadly, but to your dismay, there's no real emotion behind it. it's almost like he's already accepted it when he says, "it means we—" he pauses and looks away. "this is over."
you reach out toward him, desperate to hold on to him—to the invisible string that ties you and satoru together, but he's just out of your grasp. "satoru, it isn't even that big of a deal, why are you—"
satoru turns and fixes you with a stern glare, and just like that, the string that kept you and satoru together for months, maybe years snaps, and you're left with a limp strand of what it once was. taking the hint, you walk out of his room in a daze, hardly noticing the way he says "i'm sorry".
and the worst part? he said he still loved you. but apparently that wasn’t enough.
satoru has every right to be annoyed that his stream is only growing because of you—his stream was the way he made money, and after all, it was never meant to be about you.
and maybe he was never meant to be for you either.
the walk home is cold and lonely. you slip a hand into your pocket—the pocket of satoru's hoodie, which you should probably return to him—and extract your earphones. it probably isn't a good idea to wear both outside as you walk home, but you do it anyway—this day can't possibly get any worse.
a soft voice murmurs words of sorrow and encouragement in your ear as the music takes you to another world. maybe this—the breakup—was meant to happen. maybe it was a mistake to date a boy with thousands of fans.
as soon as you get home, your phone dings softly. you pick it up and frown when you see it's from toru. you'd have to change that name later.
toru: idk if u blocked me already but i still have a lot of ur things, do u wanna come pick them up later?
toru: or i can drop them off tmrw ig
you miss the way he used to text you—with an obnoxious amount of exclamation points and an even worse amount of emojis. now, it's like all of the flavor's gone from his words, and it hurts. that's when it actually settles in, that this is really over. it hurts like an icicle being driven straight through your heart, and it stings like one, too.
satoru's texts are left on delivered for five whole minutes before you reply, and it's only with an "i'll come by tmrw". he likes the message less than a minute later, and you're left to wallow in your misery alone until you finally drift off to sleep.
the next morning, you open your phone to a notification alerting you that satoru’ll be live on stream in ten minutes. curiosity kills the cat, but in this case, maybe it’d be worth it to see what he tells his viewers about your breakup. after all, there’s no way he wouldn’t tell them—he always had something to say about you, and he’d probably rather tell them for sure rather than let them come up with ridiculous theories on their own.
so you hastily make a new account using some email account you haven’t touched since middle school, trying a couple different passwords until you remember the one that works. the website hits you with a hundred questions, asking you about your favorite games and who’d you like to subscribe to first. you choose satoru, albeit after a second of hesitation. two minutes later, sparklingzebra672 joins your ex-boyfriend’s stream. you wait a second, holding your breath as the live loads. a brief moment later, satoru’s painfully familiar face appears on your screen.
“hey guys,” satoru says, forcing a smile on his face. even from behind a screen, you swear you can feel his eyes on you. “how’s everyone today?”
the already unstable smile on satoru’s face falls when he opens the comments and gets greeted with a flurry of where’s your girlfriend’s. had you been anyone else, you probably wouldn’t have noticed the way satoru’s eyes dulled ever so slightly or the way he curled into himself, but being the girl who once knew him best, you could tell.
“oh, she won’t be back on here for… a while,” satoru starts, dancing around the topic. he leans back against his chair and tilts his chin up, azure eyes focused on the ceiling. “we broke up.”
nothing could’ve prepared you for the way satoru’s comments explode. it’s almost like you can hear the shocked gasps coming from all fourteen—no, twenty thousand viewers as the words nobody thought would ever they’d hear from satoru are spoken.
suguru-geto: holy shit im so sorry
toji-fushiguro: wait wtf r u kidding?? that's fuckin crazy
yuuji-itadori: omg i thought u guys were together forever :(
inumaki: chat is this real??
satoru shrugs, averting his eyes from the hundreds of comments pouring in, but you scroll through and read them all. everyone, even satoru’s haters, seems genuinely shocked. in fact, had this not been your own breakup, you would’ve been one of them, begging and pleading satoru for more details.
“yeah, we did,” satoru murmurs, eyebrows furrowing just enough for you to read his expression. now that you’re looking closer, you can see the subtle redness underneath his eyes—had he been crying too? and maybe you’re imagining it, but his hair seems a bit dishelved too. your ex-boyfriend shrugs, forcing his face back into his usual lighthearted expression, but it’s not fooling anyone.
satoru scowls at the new flood of comments asking him why you two broke up. some people are already hypothesizing—maybe it’s because you got jealous of his fame, or maybe he got sick of you. maybe you left him to go date some other streamer, or maybe—
“i’m actually gonna end the stream here, ‘cause i don’t really want to deal with all of this right now,” satoru says with a frown. his eyes are narrowed irritably as a couple users protest, still begging for more details. “you guys know that i’m a real person with my own life, right? fuck off.”
and just like that, the stream ends. you’re left with a blank screen and a message saying that satoru’s ended the live, so you shut your laptop. your stomach turns as you groan, just remembering that you have to go over to his place later to retrieve your things, and somehow, you’d have to pretend that you didn’t just stalk his stream to see if he’d say anything substantial about the breakup.
a couple minutes after the stream ends, your phone blows up—every mutual friend you and satoru have is messaging you about what he said, but you can’t bring yourself to open any of them. except for one.
suguru: r u ok?
you: yeah ig
suguru: do u want anything?
satoru’s best friend’s question catches you off-guard—there are a lot of things you want. you want this whole situation to go away. you want the world to disappear. and most of all, you want satoru back, without the online world attached.
but suguru can’t do any of those things, can he? so you leave him on read.
somehow, you fall back asleep, tossing and turning in your bed without satoru’s steady arms to accompany you. a couple hours later, you wake up again, wincing from the dim sunlight that pours through your windows and directly into your eyes. it’s just past five, so you figure that you might as well go down to satoru’s house and get your things. better to do it now than drag it out for an uncertain amount of time.
the walk is shorter than you remember, but maybe it’s just the absence of music pouring into your ears that makes it seem that way. you watch the wilted autumn leaves flutter in the wind, falling down onto the sidewalk like pieces into place. once upon a time, you had walked these very streets with satoru—it’s a fond memory you remember only all too well.
when you finally step onto your ex’s doorstep, the door opens before you even have a chance to knock. and there he is—the boy who’d once been the love of your life. satoru looks down at you with an unreadable expression. “hey.”
you think you’ve seem this film before, and you didn’t like the ending.
satoru spares you from having to reply by opening the door wider and beckoning you inside. “i already put most of your stuff into a couple boxes, but i thought you’d wanna check on your own. just in case i forgot something.”
you nod and walk past him, not trusting your voice to be steady. this was harder than you expected—much harder. in fact, you’re practically on the verge of breaking down when you step into satoru’s room and look around and see just how different it looks without the touches of you everywhere.
the fortnite poster you’d given him as a joke for the second anniversary of his stream was gone from his wall, and so were the two mini succulents that used to sit on the corner of his desk. the white cat plushie that used to rest on his pillow was gone, too—probably stuffed somewhere in one of the boxes outside his bedroom door.
after nearly a minute of looking around, you decide that whatever satoru possibly could’ve missed wasn’t important enough for you to have to stick around any longer.
you turn and start to exit satoru’s room so fast that you nearly crash into him when he suddenly appears in the doorway. “shit, sorry about that,” you mumble, trying to walk around him. but of course, because the universe is actually praying on your downfall, you and satoru both walk the same way at the same time. you awkwardly try to go around each other, and eventually, the humiliation is over.
“so, you got everything?” satoru asks, walking beside you with his hands in his pockets. you nod, bending over to pick up one of the two boxes. it’s pretty heavy, but not unmanangable. you just don’t really seem to know if you’ll be able to carry both back home at once.
“oh, uh, i’ll be right back,” you say tentatively. a flash of confusion appears in satoru’s eyes, so you clarify, “i’m gonna go grab my car. that’ll make it easier.”
satoru’s eyebrows furrow and he shakes his head. “no, it’s alright. your place isn’t far from here at all, i’ll just take the other and walk back with you.”
“no, really, it’s alright.”
“it’s the easiest option, ba—” satoru cuts himself off, stopping himself from calling you baby for the first time since you two had started dating. “sorry.”
“let’s just go.”
the walk back to your house is brutal. you walk side by side with satoru since the path is wide enough for you to do so, and you two just keep bumping into each other. had you still been dating, satoru probably would’ve dropped the box and scooped you up instead, kissing your cold face to warm it up. of course, that would’ve added five minutes to your walk, but it would’ve been better than the tense silence dividing you and satoru right now.
the wind whistles around you, brushing at your skin and making you shiver with every gust—there’s nothing more you’d like than to go home, plop on your couch and cry while watching the titanic for the hundredth time.
after what seems like three hundred awkward hours later, you and satoru finally make it to your house. “thanks,” you say quietly, setting down your box in front of the door.
satoru places his next to yours and slips his hands back into his pockets. he nods and replies, “no problem,” but still doesn’t leave.
you cross your arms, and tilt your head, meeting his eyes hesitantly. “umm, do you need anything else?”
satoru coughs tensely and shrugs. “oh, uh, not really, just—” his eyes drift down to your top, and your face grows warm when you realize you’re still wearing his hoodie.
“shit, my bad,” you mumble, internally cringing and resisting the urge to say every curse word you know. could this day really get any worse?
well, at least satoru looks equally as embarrassed. he shakes his head and gestures for you to keep it on. “it’s fine, it’s kinda cold anyways. keep it.” satoru hesitates, shuffling his feet before continuing, “if you want something… to remember me by.”
what you say next was done entirely against your will. “do you still love me?” you ask suddenly, not sure what otherworldly force prompted you to do so. you instantly regret it when satoru’s face goes even redder, and you can tell it’s not from the cold the way his blush spreads to his ears.
“i— uh, i mean—”
“answer me, satoru, i think i have a right to know.”
he looks away and mumbles something about needing to go back home, to feed his fish or something (he doesn’t have a fish), and you grab his hand just as he starts to turn away. “please, satoru, i need to know,” you breathe, squeezing his hand harder when he flinches.
ten silent seconds tick by, but you still don’t let go. so satoru sighs, a soft white puff of air coming from his lips. “yeah.”
your heart breaks again.
“then why did you—”
“because i don’t know how to do this,” satoru says, blue eyes darting all over the place. “i love you, i really do, but i just can’t— i don’t like having thousands of people thinking that i’m only worth looking at if i’m with you, it’s annoying and it pisses me off and i don’t want to accidentally take it out on yo—”
you cut him off with a kiss, ignoring the way he yelps a little in surprise. but thankfully, he doesn’t push you away—instead, his arms instantly wrap around you and pull you closer into his warm, warm chest. satoru’s lips are a little dry, but still minty as ever from the peppermints he’s constantly munching on. he kisses you back like a man starved of affection, and when you two finally break apart, his eyes are just as hungry.
“you idiot,” you whisper, trailing your fingers through his hair as tears prick at the corner of your eyes. “you shoulda just talked to me about it first.”
“i know,” satoru mumbles, looking down bashfully. “‘m sorry.”
“you should be.” you pause, watching satoru’s lips curve into a pouty frown. “i’m sorry too,” you murmur, and he looks up, confused. “i should’ve seen this coming.”
satoru shakes his head and presses his lips to your forehead, lingering for a couple seconds before pulling back. “i missed you.”
“i was gone for less than a day, satoru.”
“oh, so you didn’t miss me?”
“i did,” you admit, exhaling a puff of air when satoru smiles smugly. “shut up, it’s not a competition!”
“yeah it is, but fine, you win,” satoru gives in with a dramatic sigh, reaching down and twining his fingers with yours. his hands, which are significantly bigger than yours, instantly warm you up. “but only ‘cause i don’t want you to break up with me next.”
“i hate you, y’know that?” you grumble, leaning into his side and letting satoru kiss the top of your head. he hums in agreement, reaching out and opening your front door.
“i’m sure you do, baby. now c’mon, let’s get inside n’ warm up. i wanna make it up to you,” satoru says with a grin, bending over and scooping up both boxes.
“oh, yeah? how do you plan to do that?” you challenge, going inside first and holding the door open for satoru. once he’s inside, you close the door and instantly get pinned against it by satoru, whose hands are already creeping underneath your clothes. “satoru, your hands are col—”
he cuts you off by pressing his equally cold lips to yours, smiling against your mouth as he tugs at your clothes. “i know, baby. but i’ll keep you nice n’ warm for the rest of the night, i promise!”
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🤍give up heaven: sunghoon
pairing: sunghoon x afab!reader
word count: 10.6k
synopsis: when you run into your best friend's ex-boyfriend at your favorite coffee shop thinking it was just a coincidence until seeing him became a daily thing. You can't get him out of your head and start to feel guilty at the very thought of him and things take a turn when he starts making advances towards you.
genre: hockey player!hoon with small mentions of figure skater!hoon, ex-bestfriend bf!hoon, hoon's ex-girlfriend best friend, friends to lovers, slight smut.
warnings: swearing, implied sex, make-out session, fingering, jerking off, verbal fight between reader, the ex, and sunghoon, MINORS DNI. lmk if i've missed anything!
You tried to avert your eyes when you saw him walk into the coffee shop. Pulling the scarf around your neck up higher and turning your face in the opposite direction.
His voice echoed throughout the small shop, ordering his regular drink. Why do you still remember how he liked his coffee?
You slowly glanced up, his back was facing towards you, his hand reaching for his wallet from the back pocket of his blue jeans.
After paying, he stepped back from the counter. You quickly turned your head away again, praying he didn’t see you or would even notice you.
“Y/N?”
Well, shit.
There's no point in hiding now. You slowly lifted your head, seeing the soft smile on his face as he slightly leaned to the side to get a look at your face, “It really is you.”
You awkwardly smile, “Yes, it’s me.”
Get your shit together, Y/N, come on.
He opened his mouth to say something, but stopped short when his name was called, “Sunghoon! Your iced coffee is ready!”
“Be right back,” his knuckles tapped on the table, his smile growing.
You carefully watched as he got his coffee and made his way back to your table, pulling the chair across from you out and seating himself.
“How have you been?” he asked excitedly, his long fingers wrapping around his coffee, taking a small sip, “It’s been what? A year?”
You nodded, wrapping your fingers around your warm coffee, “I see you still drink iced coffee even during the winter, some things never change huh?”
Sunghoon softly chuckled, his smile just growing brighter and wider, his natural fangs peeking from his lips, “Everyone knows iced coffee is superior,” he leaned his elbows onto the table, “Your hair is longer, it looks good. You look good.”
You smiled, “Thank you, you look really good as well, Sunghoon.”
Sunghoon gave you a soft smirk and flexed his arms, “Why thank you! Been working out a lot lately.”
You rolled your eyes and took another sip of your coffee, “You really haven’t changed.”
His laugh was enough to make you laugh as well, the corners of your lips curving upwards no matter how hard you tried to push it down.
It felt like old times.
Speaking about old times…
His smile finally faded, the happy expression he once had was also gone, his face relaxing into a kinda of sad softness.
His voice trembled, “How is uhh…how is she?” his eyes darted to the corner of the table.
Oh…he’s still in love with her.
Your lips thinned into a line, trying to figure out what information was appropriate to give out.
“She’s really good.” it wasn’t a total lie.
Sunghoon nodded, the corner of his lips barely curling, “That’s… um…that’s good then. I’m glad she’s doing well.”
It broke your heart that he couldn’t even say your best friend's name. It must still hurt even after a year.
Sunghoon dated your best friend for almost three years. You remember when the two of you first met him at your college's hockey game.
He bumped into the two of you, spilling his soda all down your best friend's outfit. Oh, man was she pissed. It didn’t take Sunghoon long to convince her to let him make it up to her.
After that, they were inseparable.
Sunghoon was a part of the hockey team, but due to a leg injury, he had to sit out until he was completely healed. But that didn’t stop him from attending every hockey game to support his teammates. He even dragged your best friend along with him. Which eventually led you to tag along as well.
The three of you became that trio that was inseparable. A package deal. If you saw one of us, the other two were sure to be right behind.
Everything was perfect until it wasn’t. Their relationship got toxic. They fought more than normally and on hangout days, either your best friend was missing, or Sunghoon was missing. Nothing felt right and the air between your friend group grew thick. Hard to breathe.
Sunghoon eventually stopped talking to you, and then they broke up. Your best friend stopped hanging around you and slowly stopped speaking to you as well. You figured it was due to the heartbreak, that she just needed her space. You didn’t think it would lead to your friendship slowly becoming nonexistent.
You two weren’t exactly best friends anymore, but after she healed from the breakup, she came back around. It just wasn’t the same as before Sunghoon came into the picture.
You two still barely talk, and barely see each other, but still kept that contact and hung out when you could.
You never understood why she pushed you away, but the heart does crazy things when it’s hurting.
And you haven’t seen Sunghoon since a couple of months before the breakup, until today. A little over a year later.
“Well,” Sunghoon’s voice brought you out of your deep thoughts, “I have to get going, need to catch practice.”
Your eyebrows raised, “You’re playing still?”
Sunghoon’s doctor finally cleared him to get back on the ice after almost a year of being off it, but due to the team setup they had at that time, he wasn’t able to fully rejoin the team again until around the time of the breakup. He was able to practice and attend the games as a sub if needed, but it was enough for him to keep his mind busy for a little bit.
You’ve secretly kept up with the scores of the hockey team, knowing Sunghoon was back on the team officially. But after a while you quit. Clearing Sunghoon from your life completely.
Sunghoon nodded, “Hell yeah I’m still playing, who do you think I am?” he teased, standing up from the table, “But, I am actually not going to hockey practice.”
The surprise must have shown on your face because Sunghoon was giggling like a child at your confusion, “I joined an ice skating team as a figure skater.”
You sat up straighter in your chair, “Since when?!”
“Since…well.” He tucked his bottom lip between his teeth, it was all you needed to know.
Being a sub on the hockey team eventually wasn’t enough for Sunghoon to keep his brain busy after the breakup. Until he was officially able to play again, he needed another distraction. Come to find out he loved figure skating as much as hockey, deciding even after being fully back on the hockey team, he kept up with figure skating as well.
You slowly nodded, “I am really glad you’re doing well for yourself, Sunghoon.”
He softly nodded back, “Thank you, Y/N. I have to get going, the ice is calling my name.”
You waved at him as he walked to the entrance, him turning back around as his back touched the doors, “It was nice seeing you!”
You agreed.
—
Your best friend sighed as another customer walked into the smoothie shop, holding up her index finger towards you as she walked away and up to the register, taking the customer's order.
You leaned against the counter, moving the seat back and forth with your hips like a child.
“Okay,” she said, returning to you after the customer's smoothie was made, “What were you telling me?”
“Just that the materials you missed in bio today weren't too hard. I took extra notes for you,” you pulled into your backpack taking out the pretty iced blue folder, “Here they are!” you pulled out the stack of notes you made for her, her taking them and holding them to her chest.
“Thank you SO MUCH YN!!!” she placed the papers in a drawer under the counter, “I could kiss you right now. What would I do without you?”
Probably survive perfectly fine since you had no problem cutting me off after you and Sunghoon broke up.
You shrugged with a smile, “Fail bio.”
She laughed and nodded, “Yeah, probably. But I have you to help keep me in the loop!”
You honestly hated how the two of you could go DAYS sometimes even WEEKS without talking or seeing each other yet she has no problem acting as if nothing ever happened.
But she was all you had, so you played along with her.
You dropped your backpack onto the floor, wondering if telling her the other thing was right or wrong.
You decided to anyway.
“I also saw Sunghoon the other day.”
Her movements slowed and her smile faded, “Is that so?”
You nodded, “We talked for a couple of minutes, but he had to go practice, so it was a short moment.”
You could see the gears were turning in her brain, “Practice? Guess he was able to get back on the team after all. That’s good at least.”
“He actually is figure skating now too, that’s where he was headed.”
Your best friend’s eyes widened, “Wow, I did not see that one coming.”
You agreed, “It was definitely not something I’d expected Park Sunghoon to do, but I guess it kinda suits him.”
Your friend nodded, seeing how deep in thought she was.
You wanted to ask her to speak her mind, but unfortunately, the two of you weren’t that close anymore.
A couple more customers walked in, sending her back away from you.
You stood from the seat, grabbing your things, giving her a smile and wave as you walked out. You only came to give her the notes she missed anyway.
Usually, when she skips out of class she gets the notes from one of the boys she’s secretly messing around with. But every blue moon she asks you.
You guessed it was the only way to keep in contact with you in some way.
—
You quickly stepped into the coffee shop, brushing off the slight snow from your hair, ready to get a sip of your favorite coffee.
The barista noticed you, giving you his famous thumbs-up, “Already on it YN!”
You gave him a thumbs-up back. You were so happy you discovered this place, it became one of your comfort places to be. It’s quiet enough to do homework or read, the coffee is amazing and all the baristas know you and your order. What isn’t there to love?
“Fancy seeing you here again,” you whipped around, seeing Sunghoon sitting in your usual spot, a book in his hands and his iced coffee half empty on the table.
Your brain spasmed, what was he doing here again?
You just nodded, “You’re in my spot.”
Sunghoon shrugged, “I can move?”
Well shit, now you feel bad.
You shook your head, “No, it’s okay. I don’t mind sharing.”
Sunghoon smiled, eyes flickering back down to his book.
The barista called your name, turning your attention back to him, “Thank you, Taehyun.”
His sharky smile warms your heart, “Always,” his eyes darted over to Sunghoon then back to you, “Do you know him?”
You sighed, “Yes, he’s an old friend.”
Taehyun nodded, his tongue sliding into his cheek, “He’s been here every day since the last time you were here.”
You froze, narrowing your eyes, “Honestly?”
Taehyun nodded again, “I just wanted to make sure you were okay and that he wasn’t some creep.”
You smiled softly at him, “No need to worry. He’s harmless.”
Taehyun gave you a half smile, then walked off to finish working.
You sat down in front of Sunghoon, his eyes not leaving the page of his book.
You cleared your throat, taking a sip of your coffee.
Sunghoon glanced up for a second at your throat clearing, “Yes?”
You cupped your hands around your coffee, “What?”
Sunghoon sighed and closed his book, setting it on the table, “You only clear your throat like that when you have something to say.”
Damn, does he remember the small details of you?
“You remember that?”
Sunghoon chuckled, picking up his iced coffee, “YN, I’ve known you for almost, what? five years? You think I’d just forget everything?”
Well, no…just didn’t think you’d care enough to remember. you didn’t date me after all.
All you could do was shrug, “My barista told me you’ve been here every day,”
Sunghoon raised a brow as he sipped on his coffee, finishing it off, “Your barista?”
“Not like that!” you snapped quietly, wishing you could jump over the table and tackle him, “I’m a regular here, Taehyun just happens to be the barista who always takes care of me.”
Sunghoon mouthed out a “wow” and leaned back into the seat, “First name bases too?”
“Sunghoon,” his name falling off your lips felt foreign, mostly since you were speaking to him, “Why are you here every day?”
He thinned out his lips into a line, eyes looking down at his Converse, “Been looking for a good coffee shop to regular, and this one surprised me when I first came in here. You just so happened to be here the day I decided to try it.”
That sounds…completely true. This coffee shop is incredible. You don’t blame him for wanting to become a regular. It was all a coincidence.
You sipped down your coffee, feeling the stare of his eyes, “Yes?”
“So back to Taehyun being your barista,”
You laughed, kicking your leg into his shin, “Stop!”
Sunghoon’s fangs slipped out as he smiled.
—
Sunghoon’s appearance in the coffee shop became more regular, just like he said.
Taehyun knew his order by heart, just like yours, and would always have it ready the moment he saw Sunghoon walk in.
You had to admit, it felt good having him back in your life. It felt like old times when you’d hang out when your best friend was too busy working. You three all used to be so close.
Yet you didn’t have the heart to tell her you were even hanging out with Sunghoon again. It technically wasn’t even hanging out, you two just happened to sit, talk, and drink coffee together at your favorite coffee shop.
Another week has flown by with Sunghoon making his appearance at the shop.
You laughed together over a book you both read, Sunghoon feeling Taehyun’s eyes on you.
You stood up, “I’m heading to the bathroom,”
Sunghoon nodded, his eyes darting to Taehyun, watching him as he watched you walk to the bathroom. A small sigh escaped Taehyun’s lips.
Taehyun then made eye contact with him, and the look he was giving Sunghoon made him clench his fists.
Your return to the table had Sunghoon relaxing, and Taehyun returning to work.
Sunghoon couldn’t take his eyes off you. He felt so at home in your presence. His mind telling him to tell you the truth, that you deserved to know. But the moment you locked eyes with him and the corners of your lips curled into that precious smile, he couldn’t do it.
“What’s up?” you asked, “You’re deep in thought?”
“Ahh…” Sunghoon tried to collect his thoughts, then quickly smiled, settling on the topic change, “What are you doing tomorrow?”
“Tomorrow?” you thought about it, “I just have class, why?”
“Come to my hockey practice tomorrow night.”
That invite took you by surprise, “Huh?”
Sunghoon smiled even more, leaning forward on the table, “Come watch my practice tomorrow. Please?”
You tried to find an excuse to get out of it, but nothing came to mind. How could you just show up to your best friend’s ex-boyfriend’s hockey practice?
“The guys would love to see you, I bet.” Sunghoon mentioning his friends only hit you in the heart harder, “Come on, YN, just like old times.”
Without a second thought, you agreed. Not knowing exactly why, but feeling as if it would be okay. It was just hockey practice.
He jumped up from the table, “I have to get to figure skating practice, is your phone number still the same?”
You nodded, heart beating faster at hearing he still had your phone number.
With a jump away from the table and a small skip, he said, “I’ll text you the details!”
—
Sunghoon twirled his hockey stick in hand, eyes darting to each entrance of the stadium.
Heeseung skated past, quickly stopping in front of him, eyes also following each entrance, “Brother, what are you looking at?”
Sunghoon snaps his attention at Heeseung, his mouth open to speak, but no words coming out.
“He’s waiting for YN,” Jay says as he also skates past, skating a circle around them.
Sunghoon rolled his eyes, “Dude.”
Jay smirked, “Should’ve kept your mouth shut.”
“Clearly, that’s the last time I tell you anything,” Sunghoon said, sliding his helmet over his head.
Heeseung raised a brow, “Wait you’re speaking to YN again?”
Sunghoon just nodded, “Yeah. We umm, ran into each other at a coffee shop.”
“Yeah, “ran into each other”, we’ll call it that.” Jay teased, leaning forward on his hockey stick.
“Shut the fuck up or I’ll kick your stick from you and laugh when you hit the ice,” Sunghoon said with a snarky smile.
“Woah now!” Jay said, holding his hand up, “You’re a figure skater now, can’t be talking like that anymore.”
Sunghoon skated forward, Jay also scooted backward sticking his tongue out.
Heeseung seemed to be the only one who was concerned, “How did the three of you make up?”
Sunghoon awkwardly chuckled, “You mean the two of us…”
Heeseung looked at his friend confused, “You and—“
“No,” Sunghoon quickly shook his head, “We aren’t talking.”
Heeseung just nodded, finally putting the pieces together, “Sorry for assuming that you rekindled with both of them.”
Sunghoon swung his hockey stick around again, “Just YN. And from what I’ve noticed, the two of them aren’t really friends anymore.”
It didn’t take long for Sunghoon to figure it out. The way it used to be, his ex would always talk about you, and you would always talk about his ex. The two of you were inseparable. A package deal. With one you got the other. And the fact that you haven’t once brought her up over the last week that he’s started talking to you again, it didn’t take a genius to figure out that she also pushed you away after the breakup.
Heeseung just nodded, “Do you blame them?” Sunghoon just looked at him, not knowing what to say, “YN doesn’t know, does she?”
Sunghoon shook his head, “No, and she won’t.”
“Hoon-“
“I am not ready to tell her,” Sunghoon snapped, “I finally got one of my closest friends back, I don’t want to cross that bridge.”
Heeseung sighed and nodded, “Okay man, just don’t get butt hurt when it backfires at you.”
Sunghoon knew this secret could backfire on him, he wasn’t stupid. But it was worth the risk.
“I’m going to see if she texted me,” he said, “Just in case she said he couldn’t make it.”
Heeseung watched as Sunghoon skated off towards his gym bag.
Dropping his gloves to the ice and carefully stepping off the ice, he sat down on the bench, opened his gym bag, and pulled out his phone, quickly finding your messages and seeing you’ve read his last text.
Sunghoon felt stupid getting his hopes up. What did he think inviting you would do?
I just wanted her back in my life again.
He tossed his phone back in the bag and stepped back onto the ice, pulling his gloves back onto his hands.
I’m so fucking pathetic.
Sunghoon adjusted his gloves, now waiting for practice to start.
Jay whistled at him, causing a glare to shoot from his eyes.
Jay tilted his head up, “Look.”
Sunghoon turned back around, seeing you walking in, your arms wrapped tightly around you.
He couldn’t stop the smile that formed on his face, immediately skating in your direction.
“You made it!” he said, sliding his helmet from his head.
You smiled back, nodding, “Sorry that I am a bit late, my class got out later.”
You walked up to the wall Sunghoon was now leaning against, his helmet resting on top of it.
“You showed up, and that’s all that matters,” Sunghoon couldn’t hide how happy it made him that you were here right now.
You nodded again, smiling wide back at him, “It’s cold as balls in here though!”
Sunghoon pointed over to his gym bag, “I have my hockey varsity jacket in my bag, wear it if you get too cold.”
“I am definitely going to wear it,” you shivered, “I forgot how cold it gets in here.”
The memory of the last time he saw you replayed in his mind, it was during a hockey game. His team was a couple of points away from winning. Sunghoon and his ex were too busy fighting off on the side of the bleachers, her stomping away not wanting to finish the conversation. His eyes wandered over to you, the sad look you gave him broke his heart even more. Your heart was also breaking due to watching your closest friends tear each other apart. All Sunghoon could do was shove his hands into his hoodie pocket and walk out of the stadium.
He watched as you walked over to his things, your hands immediately reaching for the jacket and sliding it onto your body.
Oh fuck I am a goner.
Sunghoon loved the way you looked in his jacket. The way it loosely hangs against your body. How cute it made you look. His heart dropped onto the ice.
Your body started warming up a bit more, sliding your hands into his jacket pockets. Your eyes traced the other players on the ice. Jay and Heeseung waving at you. You waved back. Gosh, you couldn’t remember the last time you saw either of them.
You’ve seen them out and about around the college, but not so personally like this. It’s been way too long.
Sunghoon skated back over to his friends and teammates.
“It’s weird seeing her again,” Jay said, watching you sit down, eyes wandering around the stadium, “Mostly seeing her without her twin at her hip. She looks really good though,”
Jay was lucky Sunghoon was in a better mood than earlier, or else he’d be wiping the ice with Jay’s face, “Can we not talk about my ex, please, and she does look good. Eyes off.”
Jay wanted to make a smart remark, but with a quick look at Sunghoon and then you, he decided to leave the teasing off the ice, giving him a nod, “Yeah, sorry man.”
Their coach finally started practice.
It went by in a flash. You waited outside the stadium for Sunghoon, his jacket still wrapped around your body.
“Well, what did you think of our practice?” Sunghoon said, sneaking up on you, and giving you a little jolt.
“It was very interesting, you played well.”
Sunghoon walked closer to you, his hands reaching up to fix the collar of his jacket, his cold fingers brushing against your skin, “My jacket looks really good on you.”
Your heart sank.
Is he…flirting???
“Oh, shoot!” you tried to play it off as if you forgot, wanting to find an excuse for the blush on your face to go away after his comment, reaching to take the jacket off, “Here, I forgot I was still wearing it.”
Sunghoon grabbed your hands and shoved them back at your side, “YN, keep it.”
“But—“
Sunghoon interrupted, “It’s okay! I promise! Just keep it for now, okay? I have another jacket I can wear.”
You nodded, feeling your body getting hot from his hands still touching yours.
Why are you getting so bothered??? You’ve known him for years. Why is every little thing he’s doing affecting you???
“Anyways,” he said, finally letting go of your hands, “We have a game this weekend, you’ll come right?”
You wouldn’t mind going, it could be an excuse to get you out of your apartment for once and not just sit at the coffee shop either.
“Yeah, I’ll come.”
Sunghoon smiled, his eyes darting to the ground to try and hide just how big he was smiling, “I’ll save you a ticket.”
—
You walked into the shop, giving Taehyun a smile and wave. Giving you the normal thumbs up.
You dropped your backpack to the floor at your normal table and slumped down into the seat with a sigh.
“Rough day?” Sunghoon asked, his yellow highlighter moving across his textbook.
You nodded, “I forgot to set my alarms last night, so I woke up late and got to class late. On top of that I had to take double the notes because…” you stopped yourself, not wanting to bring your best friend's name into the mix.
Sunghoon stopped highlighting, he didn’t even have to hear her name to know what you were going to say, his eyes slowly rising to meet yours, “You’re still taking notes for her?”
You just shrugged, “Maybe…”
“YN,” he dropped his highlighter into the textbook, “You need to stop doing that.”
You didn’t know how to respond. Mostly because you knew he was right. She was just using you at this point.
Taehyun interrupted your thoughts by setting your coffee down in front of you, “Tae! I could have gotten it from you.”
His cute sharky smile came out, “Don’t worry about it, I don’t ever get to bring the coffee to you. Plus I needed to get away from behind the counter.”
You smiled up at him, “Thank you.”
Taehyun rested his hand on your shoulder, giving it a soft squeeze, “It’s no problem at all, YN.”
Sunghoon clenched his fists under the table, eyes burning holes into his hand that was touching you.
As Taehyun walked away, he locked eyes with Sunghoon as if to say “Your move now, buddy.”
Oh, I’ll play your game, Taehyun.
“He totally has a crush on you.” Sunghoon spat out.
You softly giggled, “Who? Tae? No,” you giggled again, taking a sip of your coffee, “He’s just a good friend.”
Sunghoon rubbed his tongue against the inside of his cheek, eyes darting back to Taehyun who was now back behind the counter, “I can see it in the way he looks at you.”
You rolled your eyes. He sounds jealous.
You glanced up at him, seeing how he kept his eyes on Taehyun.
Oh, he’s…actually jealous??? No. It couldn’t be. He’s still in love with his ex.
You shook the thoughts from your head, deciding to change the subject, “Are you ready for the game tomorrow?”
Sunghoon’s eyes made their way back to you, his face relaxing and a small smile formed, “Yes, you’re still coming…right?”
You nodded, “I wouldn’t miss it,” you took another sip of your coffee, “Wasn’t able to see you play back then, so I’m excited to see you play now.”
Hearing you say that warmed his heart. Knowing you’ll be in the crowd cheering for him and only him. He had to make sure he was on his ‘a game’ tomorrow.
“Make sure to wear my jacket tomorrow,” Sunghoon gave you a wink, picking his highlighter back up and continuing where he left off.
You giggled, “Why? What will your jacket do? Bring good luck?”
Sunghoon chuckled, stretching the highlighter across the words on the textbook, “It has an S.H. and my last name on the back,” he glanced back up at you, “And you know, yeah, you wearing my jacket will bring good luck. You’ll be my good luck charm.”
Sunghoon took notice of the slight blush on your cheeks, his smile growing more as he looked back to his textbook.
God, she’s so cute.
You tried to slow your heart rate. Why is he making you feel like this?
“It’s getting kinda late,” Sunghoon’s voice pulls you from your thoughts, “Are you hungry? Want to grab a bite to eat? Then I can walk you to your apartment?”
You nodded.
You weren’t sure what these butterflies in your stomach meant, but it made you feel guilty for even having them.
—
It was game day and your nerves were all tied together in a knot.
You took one last look at your outfit in your mirror, fingers twisting in the belt loops of your ripped skinny jeans, pulling them up further above your hips.
Your college’s hockey team t-shirt had a small hole at the bottom of the shirt, which was to be expected. This was an old shirt and you haven’t worn it since the last game you attended…the night Sunghoon pushed you out of his life.
Your black high-top vans looked like they’ve seen better days, but looked good with the outfit.
Grabbing a hair tie from your vanity, you pulled your long hair back, wrapping the tie around it, just to pull it out right after.
You tried different hairstyles, not liking a single one.
Why do I even care how my hair looks?
You settled for a ponytail, deciding it’s what matched the outfit better.
The last final piece was Sunghoon’s jacket, pulling it over your shoulders. You turned around in the mirror, glancing back to see his initials on the back.
“You’ll be my good luck charm.”
You caught yourself smiling at the memory, bringing the hems of the jacket up to your nose, breathing in the smell.
It still smelt like him, even after you’ve had it for the last couple of days. The familiar smell of blackberry and floral filled your senses.
His scent brought you comfort, the knot of nerves unraveling and disappearing.
While the nerves found their way out, other feelings crept their way in.
Your heart raced faster, thinking about the smile on Sunghoon’s face he’d have when he saw you.
The more thoughts of him that flooded your brain, the more guilty you felt.
He’s your best friend’s ex…you can’t be thinking about and getting so giddy over him.
You slapped your hands to your face, hoping it would be enough to kick those feelings out.
Unfortunately, they didn’t.
You sat down at your vanity, pulling open one of the drawers, revealing a photo booth picture strip of yourself, Sunghoon, and your best friend.
You held the fragile paper in your hands, staring at each set of photos one by one. Eyes locking onto Sunghoon.
You didn’t feel this way about him back then, so why now all of a sudden does he have your stomach tied in knots?
His smile in the photos sent your heart racing. The way he was looking at your best friend, you couldn’t help but wish he looked at you like that.
You quickly shoved the photo strip back into the drawer, slamming it shut.
You stood from the chair, grabbed your phone and keys, and walked out of your room.
By the time you showed up at the stadium, the opposing team and Sunghoon’s team lined up on each side of the rink doing their warmups.
Your eyes searched for him, seeing the number 23 skating by quickly, him swinging the hockey stick, sending the puck flying into the goal.
Even though it was just a practice shot, you clapped anyway.
Sunghoon skated back into line, eyes wandering the crowd until he found you. Your smile sends butterflies in his stomach fluttering about.
God, you look so good right now. The way your hair was pulled back, the way your thighs peeked out from the rips of your jeans, and how perfect his jacket looked on you.
Sunghoon never let his ex wear that jacket, it was so special to him, so much that only he wanted to wear it. But it was so different with you.
He gave you a wave, letting you know that he does indeed, know you’re here.
The game finally started, and the butterflies did not calm down one bit. He had to do well in this game. He couldn’t disappoint you.
Heeseung patted his back, “Calm down buddy, you’re our best player. Can’t have you tapping out on us.”
Jay agreed, “This isn’t even the first game of the season, what’s got you so worked up all of a sudden?”
“YN is here,” Niki, one of the only freshmen on the team, teased.
Sunghoon shot the younger one a glare, “Brother, you don’t want to tease me right now.”
Niki smirked, “Man, I know enough about your life and I barely have been on the team.”
Jay slapped Sunghoon’s shoulder, “Just ignore the kid, he’s just a little silly.”
Niki agreed, “Just a little bit.”
Sunghoon waved his teammates off, “I am fine, my nerves have nothing to do with YN being here.”
His friends looked at him with telling faces, they knew he was lying. Knew he was full of shit. But deciding to let it go.
The game went on, each of the teams scoring left and right.
You sat on the edge of your seat, hands clasped together at your chest. There were five minutes left on the clock, your team was only a point ahead.
Your eyes followed Sunghoon on the ice, you could tell by his body language he was stressed. The way he stretched his arms out over his hockey stick behind his neck was enough to tell how absent-minded he was in this moment, the only thing he could focus on was getting one last point. Swinging his stick back down onto the ice, slightly bending over, ready for anything.
Jay passed the puck to Niki, pushing the puck across the rink, Sunghoon positioned himself, screaming for Niki to pass the puck towards him.
Niki passed it quickly to him. Sunghoon grabbed the puck, pushing his feet and legs as quickly as he could against the ice, the only thing on his mind was to keep the puck against the stick.
As he neared the goal, the goalie prepared himself for Sunghoon to make a shot.
Sweat dripped down the side of his face, hands gripping tighter on the stick as he lifted it from the ice and puck.
You stood to your feet, hands hovering over your chest, gripping at the fabric of your shirt.
Sunghoon swung the stick using all the force possible and hit the puck, watching as the black disc flew across the ice.
The world seemed to go in slow motion for Sunghoon, his eyes wide as the anticipation of waiting for the puck to reach the goalie, it sliding gracefully between the goalie's legs, the guy barely missing to stop it.
Sunghoon pivoted, stopping his motion on the ice. His eyes locked onto the puck, confirming it hit the net.
He turned his body towards his teammates, the world around him going back to normal speed. The crowd cheered, and his teammates surrounded him, slapping their hands against his chest, shoulders, and back. The clock hit its final second, the buzzer sounding. The game was over. We won.
We won..!!
Sunghoon started screaming and cheering with his teammates, hands slapping them as they continued to slap him.
You rushed down to the wall, the upper half of your body leaning over it, cupping your hands to your mouth, “Sunghoon!!!”
He didn’t hear you over the screams of his mates and fans. But it felt as if he knew you were waiting for him.
His eyes found you and started pushing past his teammates, sliding his helmet off and handing it and his stick off to Heeseung.
Using what was left of his leg strength, he pushed himself towards you quickly.
He stretched his arms up in the air, shouting, “WE DID IT!!”
You couldn’t stop your smile from falling, not when Sunghoon looked as happy as he did at that moment. His fangs were on full display from how wide he was smiling.
His body crashed against the wall, his gloved hands wrapping around your waist, connecting his torso to yours.
His wet sweaty hair tickled your cheek as he pulled you into a hug. The first hug you’ve received from him since…well the breakup.
You patted his back, leaning your head against his, “You played so well! I am so proud of you!”
You’ve never gotten to tell him how exactly proud of him you were. For all the years you’ve known him, he’s always given his one hundred percent, but because of the past circumstances, you weren’t able to voice how proud you were of him, your best friend wouldn’t have allowed it.
Hearing you tell him how well he did was enough to risk everything. It did something so deep to his heart that he couldn’t hide it anymore.
It’s now or never Park Sunghoon, just do it.
“I told you. I told you that you were my good luck charm,” he whispered in your ear, brushing his cheek against yours as he moved his head up. Brushing his nose against yours softly before moving in, pressing his lips against yours quickly.
So fast that you didn’t have time to process it as his hands left your waist and he was skating backward away from you. He bit his bottom lip as his eyes stayed locked with yours.
Your fingertips touched your lips, your ears blocking out all sound as the rest of your senses focused on the man in front of you.
He kissed you…Oh my god, he kissed you!!!
Sunghoon gave you a wink and said “Meet me by my car!” then turned back around, skating to his teammates, all of them huddling together.
—
He pressed you up against his front door, using your body to completely shut it, his fingers flipping the lock as his tongue invaded your mouth, your brain going fuzzy.
You met him at his car after the game and convinced you to have dinner with him and the team.
You sat beside him in the booth at this fancy diner, his arm was wrapped around your shoulder, his fingers softly rubbing against your arm. Once the food arrived at the table, his arm went from being behind you to his hand resting on your thigh, his fingers sliding between the rips of your jeans, squeezing the plush skin.
His touch was driving you crazy, and with your new emotions towards him, it made his contact with your skin make you hot and bothered.
Sunghoon couldn’t keep his hands off you, and you liked it. Liked the attention he was giving you.
Liked it so much that you didn’t even think twice when he drove right past the street of your apartment building and pulled into his apartment building.
He held both your hands tightly, his smile so bright as he guided you up the stairs to his apartment. Soft laughs leaving his lips at just the thought of being with you.
He was dying to kiss you again. Like properly kiss you.
He wanted to kiss you so bad that the moment you were inside his apartment, his hands and body were pressed against yours, using his weight to push you against his door. Lips connecting to yours as if he were running out of oxygen and your lips were the sole source of air.
His hands moved from your hips, sliding up your torso, fingers grazing against your breasts and up to your neck, hands cupping your jaw.
You kissed him back forcefully, pushing your tongue between his lips, rubbing the muscle against his own, mixing your saliva.
You tasted so sweet to him. He couldn’t get enough.
Sunghoon went to pull away, wanting to attach his lips to your neck, but you weren’t ready for his lips to leave yours.
You caught his bottom lip between your teeth, biting a bit harder than you expected.
Sunghoon hissed out in pleasure, rolling his hips against yours, his clothed hard length pressing at your heat.
You released his lip, his hands taking yours and lifting them above your head, pinning you against the door, his lips attaching themself to your neck, “Keep acting up baby and I just might have to punish you.”
His words sent chills down your spine as he left open mouth kisses on your neck. Your imagination running wild at what these punishments would be, but being too afraid to test his limits.
Sunghoon loved hearing the soft moans escaping your pretty little mouth. It was music to his ears.
He placed his leg right between yours, using it to spread them further apart, giving him more access to press his cock against you.
You were shaking, wanting to completely feel him against you, skin to skin.
“Hoonie,” you whispered in his ear, “Please,”
Sunghoon reached down, cupping the back of your thighs and lifting you up, wrapping your legs around him. His hands sliding to cup your ass, lips finding yours again.
“Say less princess,” he mumbled against your lips as he carried you to his bedroom.
He laid you down gently on his bed, his right hand stayed on your thigh, squeezing it tightly to keep it wrapped around him as his left hand flew to his shirt, fingers working their magic at the buttons.
You became impatient, sending your hands to help undress him.
You slid the fabric off his shoulders and down his arms, your fingers feeling every muscle as they traced down his skin and off his body.
Your eyes took a moment to appreciate his body. You already knew he worked out, but good lord was his toned, buff body beautiful.
Sunghoon kissed you again, his hands sliding his jacket off your body then finding their way under your shirt and up and over your head.
He worked with the button of your jeans as you worked with his.
He slid his jeans and underwear down together, leaving him completely bare to you.
His fingers looped between your jeans and panties, lifting your hips up as he pulled them off your body.
“Fuck, YN,” he moaned out, hands snaking underneath you to unclasp your bra, your breasts falling to their natural place once the material was on the floor. His eyes looked your bare body up and down, before laying his body on top of yours, “You’re so beautiful.”
Your fingers tangled in his hair when he kissed you again, your tongues dancing together in perfect rhythm, his hand sliding down your body and stopping at your thigh to pull it back over his waist.
Sunghoon was completely turned on just by the skin-to-skin contact, by just feeling your pretty legs wrapped around him.
He rolled his hips, rubbing his dick against your clit, his hand fumbling at his nightstand drawer for his box of condoms.
You woke up that next morning with the sun shining through his bedroom window.
Sunghoon had his head on your chest still fast asleep.
His arm was wrapped around your waist, the bedsheets were tangled up between yours and his legs. His leg hung out from the sheets and they hung at his hips, his bare back exposed.
Your heart raced at the site in front of you.
Did this actually happen?? I am not dreaming?
Your hand touched his bicep, fingers softly moving up and down his arm.
Sunghoon moved his head up, tucking it in your neck, arm tightening around you. He was still fast asleep.
Guilt washed over you once again. You just had sex with your best friend's ex-boyfriend. She would kill you both if she knew what happened last night.
Did you regret it? Absolutely not. The sex was perfect. Sunghoon is perfect. But that still didn’t stop the thoughts that it shouldn’t have happened.
Would you do it again? Regardless of these thoughts? Also yes.
Your relationship with Sunghoon was different now. You had deep feelings for him. And the fact that he kept inviting you over, inviting you to his practices and games, asking to see you after classes, and randomly showing up at your front door, proved enough to you that it wasn’t about the sex that night, that his feelings also ran deep for you too.
Your coffee shop days were more intimate, instead of sitting across from each other, you’d sit beside each other. Hands locking together as you’d drink your coffees.
He would be waiting outside your apartment door every single morning to drive you to class.
You would cheer him on from the bleachers at every practice, and have dinner with him afterwards.
The sex got more intense the more comfortable you both got. You saw a whole new side of Sunghoon in the bedroom. A side you never thought you’d ever see or even thought about seeing until recently.
He explored every inch of your body, his fingers pumping in and out of your pussy. Shoving his fingers in your mouth as he pounded into you from behind. Bruises were left on your hips from how his fingers would grip your skin.
You got more bold too. From being his little submissive princess to a dominant queen. The way you’d jerk your hand up and down his cock sending his head flying back, body shaking from your touch as you straddled him.
Sunghoon became a part of your daily life, just like he was all that time ago.
You showed up to every game wearing his jacket, being that good luck charm you knew you were to him. Everything felt right.
—
Sunghoon wrapped his arms around you, pulling you down onto your couch with him, “Babe, cuddle me! I am touch starved!”
You rolled your eyes at him, trying to wiggle your way out of his grip, “We just had sex, yet you’re still touch-starved?”
“Obviously!” he nuzzled his face at the nape of your neck, hands gripping the hem of your shirt, “Let’s have sex again.”
“Hoonie,” you giggled at the feeling of his lips kissing your neck, “You have practice in thirty minutes, you need to get ready soon.”
Sunghoon groaned against your neck, but he knew you were right.
Sunghoon went to propose skipping practice tonight but got distracted by your phone ringing, eyes darting over to it, being the nosey guy that he is, and seeing…his ex’s name on the caller ID.
His smile faded, why would she be calling you?
You sighed at seeing your best friend's name on your phone, finger-hitting the decline.
Calling her your best friend seemed pointless now. Right before things kicked off between you and Sunghoon, she found another boy toy to mess around with, completely ignoring you. You’ve also tried many times to hang out with her, to go by and see her at her job, to invite her over to do homework, to try and just hang with her when Sunghoon was busy, yet all she did was ignore you. So the fact she’s hitting you up now only means she needs something from you. And to say you were exhausted from it would be an understatement.
Maybe it was karma for keeping your relationship with Sunghoon a secret from her. But you also knew you couldn’t tell her. At least not right now.
You felt bad declining the call, deciding to shoot her a quick text saying you were busy in the shower and couldn’t answer the call just for her to reply saying it was fine, but was wanting the notes from class today and then sent a smiley face :)
Sunghoon shook his head, “Please don’t.”
You set your phone down, not responding to her, “Don’t what?” you knew the answer, but tried to play dumb anyways.
“YN, stop playing this game with her, she’s using you.”
You knew it was true, but hearing it come from his mouth didn’t mean it didn’t hurt any less.
Sunghoon bit his lips in a way to keep himself calm. He hated that she was doing this to you. He saw firsthand how badly the breakup affected you too. You lost both of your best friends because of it. But the shitty part was you weren’t supposed to lose her, but you did anyway. She was supposed to stay by your side but didn’t.
She abandoned you. Even after she promised him she wouldn’t.
The secrets he wishes he could tell you in hopes of you cutting her off for good, but he couldn’t break that trust with her, even if she deserved it.
The only thing he could do was try and convince you in other ways.
“Baby,” he whispered, “Look at me.”
You did, shifting yourself in his lap to face him.
He tucked your hair behind your ears, “You deserve better than that. I know you love and care for her, and that she’s your best friend, but this friendship is toxic. All it is doing is hurting you.”
You looked away from his chocolate eyes and to the floor, “I know.”
Sunghoon pulled your chin between his fingers, forcing you to look back at him, “I don’t want you to hurt anymore, not just because of her, but because of me too. We both did some damage to you and I have to live with that. I am so fucking lucky you let me come back in your life. And well, I am not saying to completely cut her out of your life,” even though that is what he’s wanting, “but don’t do things like this for her anymore.”
You nodded. He was right. The only reason you kept doing things for her no matter what they were was to keep her in your life. You kept holding onto a rope that was torn a long time ago.
“Promise me,” he asked, holding up his pinky finger, “Please.”
You wrapped your pinky tightly with his, sealing the promise.
—
It was the final game of the season, if the boys win this game they move on to the championship.
Sunghoon stood with you by the wall, his hands trembling in his gloves.
He was nervous, scared even, it was written all over his face.
“Sunghoon,” you saying his name always sounded so beautiful to his ears. He looks over to you, giving a nervous smile, “It’ll be okay. You’re one of the best damn players on this team. The championship is calling your team's name!”
You could only hope your words were reaching him, helping make him feel better.
Which it did. His hand stopped trembling just from your smile. You were his good luck charm after all.
He slid his hand from his glove, cupping the side of your face, “I am the luckiest man alive to have you.”
You leaned into his hand, his thumb rubbing against your skin.
His couch blew the whistle for warm-ups to start.
“Gimme a good luck kiss princess,” he said pulling you closer to him, “It’ll give me strength.”
You giggled against his lips and pouted as he skated away, giving him a thumbs up.
Little did you know, your “best friend” was sitting in the bleachers, watching the entire thing.
The game went in a flash, Sunghoon once again scoring the winning goal.
You jumped from your seat and pressed against the wall, arms stretched out and waiting for Sunghoon to embrace himself into you, his lips crashing against yours in celebration of his win.
You stood at the end of the bleachers, eyes staring off down the hallway that led to the locker rooms, heart racing at wanting to see Sunghoon again, to be able to give him a proper hug for his win.
“OMG! You came to the game too?!”
Your heart sank at her voice, your friend connecting her shoulder to yours as she stood beside you.
Your body tensed, “Y-Yeah, it was their last game so I came to support them.”
“Hmmm,” she hummed, her hands flying to Sunghoon’s jacket, “Isn’t this Hoon’s?” She forced you around, seeing his name printed on the back.
She knows she’s got to know.
She hummed again, “Why do you have his jacket, YN?”
You shrugged, leaning back against the bleacher, “I was cold and he offered it to me I guess.”
She crossed her arms, “He never let me borrow it, weird.”
“I was freezing,” you tried to play it off, “You know how cold I can get sometimes.”
She nodded, “That’s true,” her eyes darted down the hallway, “Since when did you and Hoon start hanging out again?”
She definitely knows.
You knew it was a matter of time before she found out, but you didn’t think it would be like this.
You opened your mouth to speak, only for her face to light up with excitement and her hands clapping.
The boys finally were leaving the locker room, “Here come our winners!” she said.
Sunghoon was with Jay, the two of them doing their handshake and walking in separate directions, Sunghoon’s smile fading after looking in your direction.
“OH EM GEE!!!” she squealed, grabbing your hand and rushing you both to meet Sunghoon halfway, “You are such a star Hoonie!”
She wrapped her arms around Sunghoon’s neck, but he was quick to pull her off of him, “What are you doing here?”
You were surprised how calm he was.
“Am I not allowed to come and support you?” she asked, raising her eyebrows.
“You lost that right when we broke up.” he scoffed, “Why are you actually here?”
She pouted, pulling you to her side, “I missed you guys, wanted us to rekindle and be a trio again.”
Sunghoon could smell the bullshit radiating out of her mouth.
Does this bitch think I am stupid?
“Rekindle?” he chuckled, “Rekindle what? Exactly?” oh he was pissed now, “Explain yourself. Now.”
She let go of your arm, taking a step closer to him, “I miss you, Hoon.” She reached to touch his face, but he caught her arm with his hand, shoving it away from him.
“Don’t touch me.”
You didn’t know what to do or what to say, this fight didn’t involve you, it was something they had to settle.
“Hoon,” she begged, “I want you back, please.”
Sunghoon took a step back away from her, “Cut the bullshit.”
She rolled her eyes, “What bullshit?!”
“I am in a relationship,” he spat out, “I am happy.”
A laugh escaped her mouth, a laugh you’ve never heard her do before, “I know, I am not stupid,” she took a step back, wrapping her arms around you, “You’re fucking our sweet YN.”
Sunghoon’s grip on his duffle bag tightened and his jaw locked. What the fuck was she trying to pull here?
She smiled, knowing she got you both where she wanted you to be, “The fact that you’re both quiet speaks volumes, lemme tell ya.”
“What the fuck do you want?” he said through his locked jaw.
“I want to know why,” she pulled a piece of your hair behind your ear, “I want to know why you both betrayed me like this. Why my ex-boyfriend decided it was okay to fuck my best friend, and why my best friend decided it was okay to fuck my ex.”
Oh, she’s going there? Game on.
Sunghoon chuckled, “Best friend? Best friends don't abandon each other!”
“That’s rich coming from you,” she retorted.
“You abandoned her!!” he snapped.
“So did you!!” she snapped back, “You walked away just as much as I did!”
“I walked away because I cared about you! I cared about your feelings! You promised you’d stay by her side, not leave her to fight alone and use her for your own personal gain, that’s not a friendship!”
“Oh, here we go,” she laughed, “It’s always about YN.”
You wanted to speak up, to ask them what that meant, but before you could, Sunghoon was reaching for you.
He’s heard enough. He’s HAD enough. He couldn’t let this conversation continue, not when she might spill everything.
He pulled you to his side, pushing you in the direction towards the exit door, “YN, baby, let’s go.”
“How long did you think you could hide? Hmm?”
Both you and Sunghoon stopped walking.
“I’ve known for a while now,” you turned and faced her, waiting for her to finish, “You think I wouldn’t notice? Wouldn't notice either of your cars at each other's apartments?”
Sunghoon laughed, “So you’re stalking us now? That’s so fucking low.”
“How could I not? Not after I saw the two of you leaving that diner downtown a while ago,”
She’s known since the beginning.
“I thought maybe, at first, you two were just hanging out again. I minded my business. But then I thought, hmm, I should surprise visit YN. And I bet you could imagine my surprise when I pulled up to her apartment and saw your car parked there and her riding your dick on her couch.” your face flushed, embarrassed, “Maybe next time make sure your blinds are closed before fucking in the living room.”
Sunghoon sighed, pulling you closer to him. He felt like shit because of all this happening to you.
“This doesn’t excuse your shitty stalking behavior,” Sunghoon said.
She shrugged, “I only caught you by coincidence at first, the second time surprised me too. The rest I had to ask around campus to find out.”
Sunghoon was getting more pissed by the second, “YN doesn’t deserve this!!”
“You’re so right!” she clapped her hands, “She does deserve better friends, I know. We were so shitty to her. But you know what she also deserves? The truth.”
The…truth?
Sunghoon shook his head, “No, let’s go,” he tried pushing you toward the exit again, he wasn’t ready for you to hear what she was about to say.
You forced Sunghoon off you, taking a few steps back towards her, “What truth do I deserve to know?”
Mostly since Sunghoon seemed so set on me leaving just now.
Your friend smirked, “The truth about the reason why we broke up in the first place.”
Sunghoon snapped her name, “Keep your fucking mouth shut!”
You look back at him, “What is so goddamn secretive?”
Sunghoon sighed, his eyes dropping to the floor.
You looked back at her, “Well??”
“The reason we broke up was because of you.” she crossed her arms over her chest, eyes darting at Sunghoon.
“Because of me?” You couldn’t wrap your head around why, “W-what did I do?”
“You didn’t do anything, YN,” Sunghoon finally said.
“Then…why…”
“Because he’s in love with you,” you stood there frozen, “He confessed to me a few months before we broke up on how deeply in love with you he was.” she said snarky, “That he caught feelings for you early on into our relationship, but kept it hidden all those years until he couldn’t. The guilt ate him up. Plus I caught him practically eye fucking you at one of the last parties we all attended together.”
You looked back at Sunghoon, his eyes glossed over. He’s been in love with you the entire time you’ve known him?
“It’s truly sad, isn’t it?” your friend continued, “The night we fought, was me making him promise to never come near you again. Guess it worked for a while.”
“Why would you promise that!” You yelled at him, “Why would you even agree to that?!”
“Because I still cared about her!” Sunghoon shook his head, “I wanted to respect her wishes, I wanted to respect you! You had no feelings towards me whatsoever, and after the last couple shitty months of my relationship with her, I wanted you to heal and find peace with losing me, had I known she would also walk away from you, I would have never let you go.”
“Why did you stay with her as long as you did if you wanted me?” It was a shitty question to ask, but you had to know.
“Because I was already a shitty person for falling in love with my girlfriend’s best friend. I didn’t want to hurt either of you. So I kept my feelings hidden until they eventually overflowed to the point I couldn’t contain it.”
With tears in your eyes, you stomped over to him, fists hitting his chest, “Why would you leave me then?! I needed you!” you cried it all out, releasing the frustration, and he just took it, “Do you know how lonely I was when you left? How terrible I felt watching you walk away that night? I lost part of my soul.”
Sunghoon pulled you to him, “Baby I know and I am so fucking sorry I did that to you.”
You cried into his chest, fingers gripping his shirt. Too many emotions were fighting you at all once. You were the sole reason your best friends broke up, how could you not feel like shit?
You pushed yourself off him, turning back towards your friend, “What is your excuse for leaving me?”
Her facial expression tightened, “How could I have stayed? Every time I looked at you all I could remember was the fact that my boyfriend wanted you, not me.”
Fair enough. But that was also such a shotty excuse.
“Guess our friendship didn’t mean shit to you,” you scoffed, “A boy meant more to you than I did. Meant more than our lifetime of friendship.”
She had nothing to say to that, just thinned her lips in a line, looking away.
“I’ve heard enough,” you softly said, “Take me home, please Sunghoon.”
He nodded, extending out his hand for you to take it, and you did. The two of you walking away.
“Enjoy my seconds, YN.”
Oh, she did not.
Sunghoon beat you to running his mouth, “At least YN pleases me. You should see the mess she makes of me since you want to stalk us so bad.”
You bit the insides of your cheeks to keep from laughing, was their sex life that bad?
Her face turned red you could practically see the smoke coming out of her ears, “Go to hell Sunghoon! It’s where you belong!”
He chuckled, “Gladly, I’d give up every piece of heaven for YN.”
She rolled her eyes, it was always about you. It’s always been you for him.
“Oh and by the way,” Sunghoon added, “I know you cheated on me multiple times with Mark from calculus, way before I confessed my feelings for YN. So us breaking up wasn’t just because of her. Suck a dick.”
Sunghoon wrapped an arm around you, a smirk on his face as you both listened to her yelling more nonsense.
—
He drove you home and walked you into your apartment.
“I really am sorry, YN.” Sunghoon wrapped you into his arms, “I never wanted to hurt you.”
You cupped his face, thumbs wiping the tears that fell, “Don’t ever apologize, okay? You were caught in a situation.”
“It’s no excuse,” he took your hands in his, “I love you, I always have. I shouldn’t have walked away.”
You just nodded, standing on your tippy toes to place a kiss on his nose, “I love you, Park Sunghoon. You’re with me now, and that’s all that matters.”
It was true. He was so lucky to have you. To finally have you after waiting for you for so long.
Thank god he decided to try that coffee shop out.
“Was sex with her really that bad?” you asked, a giggle escaping.
He laughed too, “Yeah, never came once.”
“I guess that means I win in that department too since I make such a mess outta you,”
Sunghoon bit his lip, sliding his hands to squeeze your waist, “Keep talking like that and I’ll ruin you.”
You pressed a quick kiss to his lips then escaped his arms, running towards your bedroom, “Can’t ruin me if I make a mess of you first.”
Sunghoon chased after you, his heart pounding at the happiness on your face.
God, he really was the luckiest man alive.
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