#first was to text mac lol

[starkwlkr]

mother (no, literally) | f1

I’m so happy you guys are loving this series 🫶🏼 this one has a bit of a time skip lol

part 1 part 2

“Did you hear the news?”

“What news?” Lando asked. It was the first race since coming back from summer break and Lando was excited. He had arrived a bit early so he could eat breakfast with his grid mom, but the mention of ‘news’ stopped him.

“Y/n is out of for the rest of the season. Porsche announced it yesterday.” His PR manager, Charlotte, told him.

“Who’s taking her seat?” He asked.

“Juan Manuel Correa.”

Lando stayed silent. He started to think of the worst possible scenarios. He knew she went to to Mykonos with Charlie for her break since she posted on Instagram and texted him that she got him several gifts. Did something happen on her vacation? He prayed that she was okay.

“Do you know if Adam is in the garage?” Lando asked.

“Yeah, he’s still there.”

And so Lando was off to the Porsche garage in search of their team principal. He definitely had the answers. After greeting the engineers, Lando spotted Adam talking with Juan Manuel Correa.

“Hey, man.” Lando greeted the older man. “Where’s Y/n?.”

Both Adam and Juan Manuel looked at Lando with a sorry look. “Did something happen to her? She didn’t text me anything about leaving Porsche.” Lando wanted the truth.

“She’s not leaving. She’s taking a break and don’t ask me for how long, I have no idea when she’ll be back, but for now we have Juan and I’m sure he’ll do an excellent job. Excuse us, we have to have a short meeting right now. Don’t worry, Lando, she’s not sick or injured. She’s fine, actually she’s more than fine.” Adam squeezed Lando’s shoulder as he passed by to get to his team.

“Do you know something?” Lando asked Juan.

“It’s not my place to tell.” Juan said then excused himself to follow his team principal.

Lando figured that if it was one thing bad then surely someone would tell him. But he received no answers.

TIME SKIP BROUGHT TO YOU BY MARK WEBBER’S DILFNESS

The F1 off season was here and Lando had plans. First, he needed to see his grid mother. It had been months since he last saw her and everytime he tried to make time to go see her, she wasn’t home. He found it odd, but at least she responded back to his messages.

Y/n was in her LA home with Charlie making dinner. She had found several recipes she wanted to try out. Her belly had grown, obviously, and she couldn’t hide it anymore. When she went out with Charlie, she would wear baggy clothes, but now those same baggy clothes couldn’t hide her bump.

“I’ve been thinking.” Y/n mentioned, grabbing a chocolate covered strawberry and eating it. “We never talked about godparents. Do you have anyone in mind?”

“I assumed Lando would be the obvious choice even if he doesn’t know about the baby.” Charlie replied, grabbing a strawberry and eating it.

“He was my first choice the second I found out. But I thought that you would choose one of your friends or costars from sons of anarchy.” Y/n stood up from her chair to check on the mac and cheese in the oven.

“If you think Lando should be our baby’s godfather then he should. He’s a great kid, babe. He’s technically your first kid.” Charlie teased.

“I miss my grid kids.”

The doorbell had rung meaning Lando had arrived. It was Charlie’s idea to have dinner with Lando to tell him the news. Well . . Once he noticed the big baby bump on Y/n, he would get an idea. While Charlie went to answer the door, Y/n got the mac and cheese out the oven.

Lando had gotten used to being around Charlie. Sure, he was a bit skeptical at first, but once he got to know the man, he knew that Charlie was the one for his grid mom.

“Hey, mate. How was your flight?” Cherie greeted Lando once he opened the door.

“Same as all the others. How are you and the missus?” Lando asked, bringing in his suitcase since he was going to stay with Y/n and Charlie for a couple of days.

“We’re great. Y/n was counting down the days until you got here. She’s in the kitchen. Babe? Lando’s here.” Charlie announced as him and Lando walked towards the kitchen.

The younger driver was stunned when he saw how much Y/n had changed. It it wasn’t a bad change, it was the best change. She smiled at Lando and walked to him to give him a hug.

“You’re pregnant! That’s amazing! Oh my god, you’re going to be an actual mum!” Lando gasped. “Is this why you’ve been hiding?”

“Pretty much. I didn’t want to make my pregnancy public until the birth. I wanted to make sure everything was okay. But it’s more than okay. Baby Hunnam is healthy and growing so fast.” Y/n explained.

“I’m happy for you. Wow, you’re going to be a mum.” He said it as if he couldn’t believe it. “Congratulations to both of you. Do you know the gender yet?”

“We decided to keep it a secret until the birth.” Charlie added.

“Well I think one thing is certain. Baby Hunnam is going to have a lot of overprotective uncles when they make their paddock debut.”

#formula 1 #f1 x reader #formula 1 imagine #f1 imagine #f1 x you #f1 driver!reader #lando norris #lewis hamilton #charles leclerc #carlos sainz jr #george russell #oscar piastri #logan sargeant #mick schumacher #alex albon

[bangsinc]

This but it's abt the spot

💕Getting home tipsy and giving the Spot little drunk kisses (Mini Fic!)💕

You have no idea the little gasp I gasped when I saw this in the best way EVER. Like I ran around in a little circle I was so excited to write about this shut UPPP

No warnings, reader is just drunk lol

The clock struck midnight as you hazily stumbled the hallway of your apartment complex, your footsteps uneasy and half of your weight leaning against the walls. The city lights cast a warm glow as the night settled in, and the light warmly cast through the windows.

The Spot was doing what he usually did when you were out and about.. waiting for you to come back reading. His gaze was locked upon the pages, his eyes tracing the lines of text with an intensity that mirrored their deep immersion. With each turn of the page, his fingers danced delicately, flipping and caressing the paper as if they were coaxing secrets from the very fibers. The world he was in was quickly sucked away though, as the sound of a lighthearted and infectious giggle rang through his head. The hole on his face widens in both suprise and excitement as he sets the book down, closing it delicately and setting it on the opposing coffee table.

The door opens quickly, and you lightly stumble in, accidentally knocking into the doorframe and quickly apologizing to it.

As your eyes scan the room, they are immediately drawn to your adoring boyfriend, his lovesick expression evident as he rushes to support you. Spots gentle touch elicits a giggle from you, and you find yourself leaning into his embrace as he guides you towards a nearby couch. A rush of excitement surges through you, and you can barely contain your joy at the sight of him. So much so, that in a little moment which you don’t exactly regret, you place a small and rather firm kiss against the side of his face.

“O..oh! Y-y/n!” Was the most your brain chose to register in that moment as you kicked off your shoes and continued to pepper little kisses along what used to be his face. A giggle escapes his lips as he revels in the silliness of the moment. It's an act of affection, an unconventional declaration of your love for him, that just by looking at him you’re so stricken and can hardly contain yourself.

You head to bed not long after your display of affection, and the Spot takes a moment to look at himself in the mirror with what could only be described as nothing but pure adoration. His hands trace against where your lips had once been, and it only confirms the fact that you love him despite what he looks like. The night passes, and the spot decides to go to bed alongside you, refusing to wipe off or remove the marks your lipstick had meant, because to him it was a reminder that you didn’t mind showing that he was yours and you were his.

You awaken in a foggy daze, a sharp headache piercing your forehead, eliciting a small, uncomfortable groan. Your bleary gaze instinctively shifts towards your boyfriend, only to discover his face adorned with an array of lipstick marks. Initially, a blush of embarrassment tinges your cheeks, but soon, that feeling dissipates, replaced by a goofy amusement that lights up your once confused expression.

#spider man #the spot #across the spiderverse #spiderman #the spot x reader #into the spider verse #bangsinc #amazing spider man #marvel x reader #marvel #spiderman into the spiderverse #spiderverse x reader #spider man: across the spider verse

[rui-drawsbox]

hmm im curious. whats olba about :0?

Oh anon you have no idea of what you just asked-- let me get my teacher costume

AHEM

OLBA or Our Life: Beginnings & Always it's a visual novel where you can play the perfect life you never got and cry about how much you wanted it after you finish it :DD (available on Steam for pc and Itch.io for both pc/mac and android!)

You play as-- well, you (or not, you choose)! You can choose your name, last name, pronouns, appearance, personality, hobbies, everything except your family, but you wouldn't like to change them for anything after you meet them.

You start the game as an innocent 8 years old kid that meets a random guy that tells you that he just moved across the street, he also tells you about his son: Cove! who has the same age as you. This guy tries to bribe you with 20 dollars, you can accept or refuse (or run! i like that option), either way you end up in a poppy hill behind your house and find the so famous Cove! He tells (cry) you that his parents just divorced and that he miss his mom ( :c ), you can comfort him or not, but you two still will be found by both of your families and have to go home.

That's the prologue! Gameplay aspect: it consists in 3 Steps of your life: 8, 13 and 18 years old! Each Step comes with 5 Moments, where you can spend time with (mainly) cove, if you're playing the base game. Talking about base game! You can complete it in around 5 hours (that's what took me the first time i think), and it comes with a 4th Step that work as an epilogue!

There are 6 paid DLC's (and a free one that is a name pack), 3 are other 15 moments for the first 3 Steps, 1 is a wedding dlc for our lovely Cove <3 (we'll get to him in no time), and the last 2 are extra content for two characters you'll meet in your very first playthough: Derek in Step 2 and Baxter in Step 3 (you should know this one very well if you follow me lmao), each with 5 moments extra for their assigned Step and their own Step 4 where you can follow and give proper closure to their stories!

I'll try to not ramble a lot because it's something you just need to experience yourself to get it but-- i will introduce you to the love interests! (or friendship interests, you don't need to crush on anyone to have a great time)

Cove Holden! Our lovely neighbor that we see almost everyday for like 10 years! You could also call him the second main character after you, since you learn more about him and his family during all the game. He's an introvert and ocean nerd (in the cutest way possible), depending on your choices you can shape his personality/style and become best buddies, the sweetest couple or just remain neighbours that never really got along. (you'll learn to love him, platonic or not, trust me)

Another perk of the game is that no matter what you do there's not "wrong or right" (unless you feel bad for the characters, like me), your actions does have consequences but there's nothing like a "bad ending/good ending", after all it's just your life, it goes on no matter what! Unless you want to reach a specific scene you found online you'll never have to use a guide for anything.

Derek Suarez! A caring guy! mabye a little too much, he's the oldest brother of 3 and that shaped him in a way that he always feels responsible of everything😔. During his storyline you'll help him to learn how to relax and lean on other people :D!

Baxter Ward! A monochromatic gentleman, mischievous as a cat and emotionally repressed like a pressure cooker <3. Struggles a lot with making deep conections and being emotionally vulnerable, you can imagine about what goes his storyline lol.

He's my favorite, if you haven't noticed. He has that infuriating charm that only someone that unironically says "Hallelujah" has. A very dramatic route, he's a very dramatic guy, you should see how he texts in step 3 aghsdas.

Also! all the side characters are super likeable, from your family to the baker of that bakery that is metioned a few times!

ANYWAYS, in conclusion: this is a very relaxing game! If you like visual novels you should definitely give it a try, the amount of replayability this game has is insane. My recommendations for when you play are:

Try the base game first! If you like it you can buy the moments dlcs (theyre only 3$ each!), mabye the wedding dlc after that (if you want to marry cove that is, this one is 2$ btw), Derek's dlc and Baxter's dlc (5$ each) for last. Those are pretty much the release order but i that's also the order i enjoy the most!

(play this game at least 2 times trying different choices/personality, the differences are ughhhh/pos)

When you're playing for the first time you should play the moments left to right. On later playthroughs you should change the order to find new dialogues! theyre small things but omg theyre so fun

Have fun! do whatever you want, i literally said there's no bad or good ending, take advantage of it and be as foward or shy as you want, be a little shit or a literal angel! That is your life we're talking about.

#rui thinks loudly #just left 2 hours and half of my back's hp in this post #totally worth it #our life: beginnings & always #our life #olba #cove holden #derek suarez #baxter ward #gb patch #gb patch games #visual novel #honestly if there's anything i can do to make more people play olba i'll do it bc this thing literally healing #im full of love for this game bitch

[mamaestapa]

I Think Somebody Has A Crush

•pairing: Joe Burrow x reader

•series summary: Y/N Y/L/N moved to Cincinnati, Ohio for a new start. Move in day arrives and she discovers something terrible...the apartment complex gave her the wrong lease. Instead of living with who she originally was supposed to, she's now living with the hottest quarterback in the NFL, Joe Burrow. Y/N is stuck living in the same apartment with him for a year...which the two are not thrilled about. However, as time goes on, they realize that maybe this wasn't the worst thing that could happen to them. Will Y/N and Joe stay enemies, or will they find themselves falling in love?

•chapter summary: Groupchat with Joe and the guys

•word count: 1.5k

•warnings: Language, jealous Joe, mentions of sex, it’s kind of cringe lol

Series Masterlist

———————————————————

October 26, 2022

chat with: joe😎, ja'marr🔥, logan🏈, sam💪🏻, evan🤩

joe😎- Guys...Im going to go crazy.

logan🏈- Come on Joey B, don't be so dramatic

sam💪🏻- What could possibly make you go crazy?

ja'marr🔥- Burrow don't listen to them, you're already crazy

joe😎- Thanks Ja'Marr, 'preciate it.

ja'marr🔥- You're welcome😍

sam💪🏻- Haha. you guys are hilarious. I cant stop laughing.

sam💪🏻- But seriously Joe, what makes you think you're going to go crazy?

joe😎- Y/n! Y/n is going to make me crazy

logan🏈- Mhm...crazy in love😏

Joe😎- Absolutely not

Logan🏈- Come on now, don't lie

Ja'Marr🔥- Y/n would make me crazy in love, that girl is sexy as hell

Evan🤩- I agree😍

Joe😎- Seriously? Come on guys.

Sam💪🏻- Hey Evan, speaking of Y/n, I saw she posted you on her story a couple weeks back. Care to explain?👀

Evan🤩- Y/n and I have been talking a bit. We've gone to the gym together a few times, worked out.

Ja'Marr🔥- "Worked out" yeah that's code for 

doin' it, E😏

Logan 🏈-lmao

Evan🤩-  Shut up, Ja'Marr. We haven't done anything...yet

Sam💪🏻- Ohhh, so you plan on doing it with her at some point?

Evan🤩- I cannot confirm nor deny that statement. If it happens, it happens. I'm just happy talking to her for now

Logan🏈- Atta boy, McPherson!😉

Ja'Marr🔥- Money Mac with the rizz😩

Sam💪🏻- Oh

Logan🏈- Yikes

Ja'Marr🔥- ?

Evan🤩- Please never say that again.

Ja'Marr🔥- What?

Sam💪🏻- Rizz. It makes you sound like a pre-pubescent middle schooler

Evan🤩-😂😂

Logan🏈- It really does😂

Ja'Marr🔥-Whatever. Y'all are just mad that you don't have any

Ja'Marr🔥 changed Evan🤩 to The Rizzler🥶

Sam💪🏻- Oh jesus christ🤦‍♂️

Logan🏈-😂😂😂

The Rizzler🥶- Ja'Marr, come on man change it back!

Ja'Marr🔥- Nah, this shit funny af💀

The Rizzler🥶-If you don't change it back, I'll tell Y/n about that dream you had.

Logan🏈- Do tell

Ja'Marr🔥- You swore you wouldn't tell a soul

The Rizzler🥶- Change my name back and I'll keep that promise, don't change it and I'll tell this whole group chat that you had a boner the size of-

Ja'Marr🔥- OKAY OKAY

Ja'Marr changed The Rizzler🥶 to Evan🤩

Evan🤩- Thank you.

Sam💪🏻-Part of me wants to hear the dream, but part of me doesn't😂

Logan🏈- You and me both😂 Hey Joe, I know you're reading these texts man, why've you been so silent?

Joe😎- Oh, I don't know, maybe it's because I don't want to hear about my teammates getting boners over my roommate

Sam💪🏻- Joe...

Joe😎- What? I just don't want to hear about Evan and Y/n fucking or about Ja'Marr having the hots for her. I already hear from her enough I don't need you guys talking about her too

Logan🏈- Hmm...it sounds to me like Burrows jealous

Joe😎-HA you're hilarious.

Sam💪🏻- Don't deny it dude, you so are. You've ignored all texts about Y/n AND your jaw clenches every time McPherson mentions her name at practice. I haven't seen you act like this since that Brayden guy tried asking Olivia out at Nicks party.

Joe😎-I'm not jealous, okay?

Logan🏈 Denial is the first stage, my friend👀

Joe😎- You guys are such idiots, I'm not JEALOUS. Evan, if you want to ask out Y/n go right ahead.

Evan🤩- Thanks...I'll think about it

Ja'Marr🔥-Oh come on man, you are totally jealous

Joe😎- Can we change the subject?

Ja'Marr🔥- ✨Jealous✨

Logan🏈- Ja'Marr wtf?🤦‍♂️😂

Ja'Marr🔥- Just callin' it like I see it

Evan🤩- Come on guys, just leave him alone. He says he's not jealous, so he's not jealous

Sam💪🏻- You don't know him as well as Ja'Marr and I do...he's totally jealous. He just hates to admit it

Logan🏈- Joe, we'll stop talking about your jealousy if you tell us why Y/n is going to make you crazy

Joe😎- Back on the topic of Y/n once again🙄

Sam💪🏻-You're the one that brought her up in the first place! You said she's going to make you go crazy. So tell us, why is she going to make you go crazy?

Joe😎- First of all, she leaves her shit all over the place. Like her makeup out on the bathroom counter, her clothes in MY laundry, her candles all over the apartment, it's just annoying.

Logan🏈- Mhm...

Joe😎- And she leaves her, how do I put this, woman items under MY side of the sink!

Ja'Marr🔥- Wait. So you're tellin me that little cup thing I found isn't a rubber shot glass?

Sam💪🏻-Oh dear god

Joe😎- Nope. That little cup thing is called a Diva Cup, Ja'Marr

Logan🏈- Yeah it's not a shot glass😂 girls shove it up their va- you know nevermind. You get what I'm trying to say.

Ja'Marr🔥- I TOUCHED THAT THING

Evan🤩- No one told you to touch it💀

Ja'Marr🔥- I don't even know what to say.

Sam💪🏻-😭That's a first

Logan🏈-😂 What else does she do Joe?

Joe😎- She's always at the apartment and I have needs. I can't just bring dates over to the place when she's home. I've tried to hook up with a girl and twice now, TWICE Y/n has walked in on us and ruined the moment

Evan🤩- She told me about that

Joe😎-Great.

Sam💪🏻-But that's not her fault, you're the one that decides to do it on your couch

Logan🏈- And not tell them you have a roommate that's a girl

Evan🤩-A very pretty one at that

Joe😎- I guess you guys are right. She just gets so annoying to live with sometimes. I just wish she wasn't my roommate. If she wasn't my roommate maybe, you know what, nevermind.

Sam💪🏻-What do you mean?

Joe😎- Shes a really sweet girl. And fuck, she's gorgeous too.

Ja'Marr🔥-👀👀

Joe😎- We got off to a rough start and I just wish things could have been different

Logan🏈-Joe…

Joe😎-What do I do to fix this?

Sam💪🏻- Joe, man, I think you might have a crush

Joe😎-Oh come on, I do not.

Ja'Marr🔥- Come on Joey B, quit denying this shit

Loagn🏈-Just admit it, you're jealous and you like Y/n. It’s not a big deal dude

Evan🤩-Yeah. Joe, I don't want to get in your way man. Just say the word and she's all yours

Joe😎-Okay FINE. Maybe I do have feelings for Y/n and maybe I am a little jealous, but I'll get over it. She obviously really likes you Evan and I don't want to get in the way of that

Evan🤩-Are you sure?

Joe😎-Yeah, I want you both to be happy. Plus, I barely even know her. You know her better than I do, shooter😂

Logan🏈- Then get to know her Joe. You see her every day and you live with her, it wouldn't hurt to get to know her.

Sam💪🏻-He's right. Who knows, maybe you two will get along if you ACTUALLY get to know her

Joe😎- I guess you're right

Ja'Marr🔥-There ain't no guessin, they ARE right

Logan🏈-Thanks Ja'Marr😚

Ja'Marr🔥-❤️

Evan🤩- So Joe...you're sure you're fine with Y/n and I?

Joe😎-Yeah, go get her shooter.

Joes pov:

I felt my heart drop as I hit send. I shut my phone off and set it down next to me on the couch. I sighed deeply and put my head in my hands. I've never felt these feelings before—about anyone.

The guys are right, I am jealous. I'm jealous that Evan gets to be the one to talk to Y/n all the time. I'm jealous that he's the one that gets to know her in ways that I wish I could.

But this does NOT, and I repeat, does NOT mean that I have a crush on her.

I just think that Y/n is a beautiful girl with a great personality.

But I don't have a crush on her.

I'm just jealous of the other guys. She's willing to get to know my teammates and not me. I did this to myself though. If things could have gone better at the start, maybe the situation with Y/n would be much different.

Logan is right though, I just need to get to know Y/n . Somehow I need to get to know the girl I've been living with for a month now. I have no clue what to do or how I'll do it, but one thing is for sure.

Y/n and I will be on better terms soon. We have to be, right?

hey loves!!

i haven't written a chat in forever, so i apologize if it's not good. i had a lot of fun writing it though, haha!

we're slowly starting to get into the GOOD good parts of this book. joe is starting to realize that maybe you aren’t just a roommate to him after all...

i already have the next chapter written (it's one of my favorites that i've written so far and i think that you will all enjoy it very much!) but i'm going to wait to post it until this one has been up for a couple days!

anyways, i hope you are all doing well! i appreciate all of the love and support you have shown on this story. it means so much to me!!🤍

tags:

@jackharloww @ilovejoeburroww @dandelionwrites8 @ijustcrypretty @sinners-98-world @a-moment-captured @stainednailpolishremover

#joe burrow #joe burrow x reader #joe burrow x y/n #joe burrow x you #nfl imagines #imagines #nfl #welcome to the jungle

[heavyhitterheaux]

Cold Water Part 3

First Lady of Private Garden Fic

AN: There's only so much that First Lady can take before she breaks

Synopsis: You and Urban are still at odds and you try to occupy your time to take your mind off of it. Everything gets to be too much and you find yourself needing not only your husband, but your best friend. The question is does he want to reconcile with you too?

Pairing: Husband!Jack Harlow x Wife!Reader

Read part 1 and part 2 first

Please Do Not Repost My Content Anywhere

As promised, Jack had taken you to both London and Paris to get your mind off of everything that had been happening around you as of lately. He was being supportive as always and was trying to do everything that he could possibly think of in order for you and Urban to apologize to each other. He admits that the argument that he had with Urban had him at a loss for words and he couldn’t quite understand why Urban wasn’t trying to hear you out and give you a chance to explain yourself. That wasn’t like him at all. 

You had not only distanced yourself from Urban, but from the rest of PG as well. You knew that anywhere that Jack went, Urban would be following right along with him and PG and you were trying to ease the tension as much as possible. So that resulted in spending more time away from them as much as they wanted you to be there with them. As of lately you had been spending more time with your sister since she was now a part of your management team, your best friend Saweetie when she wasn’t in the studio or performing, Lil Nas X, Druski, Drake, 21 Savage, and EST Gee since those are people that your husband would approve of. People such as your fans were also beginning to notice the tension between you and Urban. The two of you would always be together and all of a sudden you weren’t. 

Most recently, Jack, along with Urban and Private Garden went home to Louisville while you went to 21 Savage’s birthday party along with Lizzo.

When PG saw the pictures and videos on your instagram, they couldn’t help but to feel some type of way about it. They would constantly be asking for you to go to places with you and you steadily declined.

Liked by jackharlow, privategarden, saweetie, champagnepapi, estgee, lilnasx, druski2funny, 2forwoyne and 3,493,028 others

y/ninsta: Freak Nik 2022! happy birthday honey 21savage!! 😘

jackharlow: y/ninsta I swear I love when you rock the short hair 😍

y/ninsta: jackharlow thank you my smush 🥰

saweetie: MY BITCHES ATEEEEEEE!!!!

danivalentine: I’m surprised you didn’t upload the twerk video lol

jackharlow: danivalentine WHAT TWERK VIDEO? y/ninsta WIFEYYYY SEND IT TO ME NEOW! 

y/ninsta: jackharlow sending it now baby 😉

druski2funny: y/ninsta send it to me too!

jackharlow: druski2funny I’ll kick your ass, go away

21savage: appreciate you for coming mamas!

2forwoyne: y/ninsta we miss you!

shloob_: y/ninsta there is a short rib with my name on it. I’ve been starving!

druski2funny: y/ninsta thank you for my personal pan of mac and cheese

lilnasx: druski2funny WHAT? y/ninsta why does he get one and I don’t?!?!

y/ninsta: lilnasx I got you baby

champagnepapi: y/ninsta I see why jackharlow hides you along with PG, that cooking is top tier

quiiso: y/ninsta still waiting on my strawberry cheesecake! I put my order in weeks ago!

y/ninsta: quiiso soon lol

claybornharlow: y/ninsta your baby misses you. are you coming to Louisville?

jackharlow: claybornharlow yes her baby does miss her and I am NOT talking about you

y/ninsta: Now, now. There’s enough of me for everyone my loves

jackharlow: y/ninsta do I need to remind you what happened the last time you said that? 😐

y/ninsta: jackharlow but you know I only have eyes for you 😘

And to make matters worse, Urban was flat out ignoring you.

Every time that you would attempt to call him or send him a text, he never answered but you could see how he was reading them.

So, you stopped trying all together.

You didn’t tell Jack because the last thing that you wanted to happen was for more tension to arise since the two of them were now kind of at odds as well. 

It was now reaching the end of October, and you had flown back to Atlanta so that you could visit her.

Her as in your best friend, Autumn.

Every year you made sure to celebrate her birthday and to visit her to update her about your life and what had been going on.

You just wished that she was here to see it and experience it with you.

The drive to the cemetery was a short one and when you and Jack had bought your house in Atlanta, you had done that on purpose. In order to be close to her.

From the time you were three, you and Autumn were inseparable. She was two years older than you and you looked at her like another big sister. You lived next to each other and that was all she wrote. The two of you did everything together, walked to the bus stop in the mornings and in the afternoon, did your homework together and she would help you, and when people would tease you since you happened to be the smallest in your class, Autumn was always quick to defend you. You were always quiet and didn’t bother anyone, Autumn made sure that she quickly put a stop to people messing with her best friend. 

You had no idea what you would do without her until well… you had to do without her.

You had just parked your car when you had gotten a facetime call from Jack and you immediately smiled. Even though it seemed like you were going through actual hell at the moment, he could always manage to put a smile on your face and you were thankful for that.

“Hi smush” You answered while attempting to give him a small smile. Jack could tell that it didn’t reach your eyes and you were putting on a front for him. 

“How’s my baby girl doing?”

“I’m okay. Did you have fun last night?”

“I did, and I could ask you the same thing, I saw the pictures, but I just wish you were here with me.”

You didn’t even answer the last part.

“I need to borrow that Louisville sweatshirt, it looks so comfy.”

“The red and black one? Here you go stealing my clothes.”

“Yes, and how is it stealing when what’s mine is yours and what’s yours is mine?”

“I’m not even going to fight you on it, mamas. I already know when I get certain things that I’ll only be able to wear it once and then it somehow mysteriously ends up on your side of the closet.”

“Exactly because you know that you’ll lose and they just wander over to my side. Not my fault.”

“What are you up to? Where are you?”

“Oh, I just wanted to take a drive. It’s really nice outside today.”

“Are you by yourself?”

“Yes, babe. But I’m fine. I’m aware of my surroundings, I promise.”

“Just be careful, you know I don’t like it when you don’t have someone with you.”

“I know, but I’m meeting up with Danielle and Nicole later.”

“Okay, you let me know when you get back home, okay? I love you.”

“I will and I love you more.”

After hanging up with Jack, you grabbed the balloons and teddy bear from your backseat and started to make your way over to where she was buried. 

You placed your blanket down to be able to sit and then set everything on top of it.

“Autumn, it’s been a while but I know you understand why I don’t come as often. It seems like all I do is cry when I do anyway and I know you don’t want that. I always make sure to come on your birthday though. That’s never going to change. So life update, Urban is pissed at me and not speaking to me because he doesn’t understand why I’m so protective of him. I feel as though if he did, he wouldn’t act that way towards me. I have already lost one best friend and I refuse to lose another one all because I didn’t speak up when I noticed that something was wrong. I love him and care about him so much, but all he is stuck on is me ruining every relationship that he has been in. I wish I would have gotten you away from him when I had the chance. I know that you don’t blame me for what happened, but I still can’t help but to feel guilty about it. I just…. I would do anything for you to be able to experience this life with me. I always say that you and Jack would have gotten along and had been best friends. In a way, I think that you sent him to me to protect me seeing as you wouldn’t be able to do it anymore. The timing is literally crazy. How is it that I meet him on the first anniversary of you leaving me? But, no one really knows about you. Not even Jack. I feel as though I should tell him about you since he noticed that every year around when October is about to end, I get sad and there’s a day where I don’t do anything but spend time with you. He has no idea that I even come here. But anyway, I went and did our usual! The mani-pedi, the whole spa treatment day, I went and bought all of our favorite snacks and I’m going to watch our favorite movies and eat them later. I just, Autumn, I don’t know what to do and I wish you were here to make all of this better. You always had an answer for everything and you were always so wise beyond your years. I could really use a hug from you right now, you did always give the best ones”

Just then there was a small gust of wind and you could have swore that you caught a whiff on Autumn’s favorite perfume that she would always wear.

“I… I know that was you. That was always your favorite perfume and I actually bought a bottle of it. But, I only wear it on special occasions. I think the last time I wore it was when me and Jack got married and that was almost five years ago. Just so I could have a piece of you with me that day. So, what else is happening? Well I’m nominated for a shit ton of AMA’s and so is Jack, I recently finished my tour and Jack finished his too. We’ve also been trying to figure out where we want to spend most of our time when I get pregnant. We’re leaning towards Kentucky since it seems like that’s where everyone is, but I’ll still come and visit you. Don’t think I’ll forget about you. And we’re also going to have our big wedding in December and I cannot wait for that. Oh and I came with gifts! I got you some balloons and I got you a teddy bear. Can’t believe you’ve been gone for ten close to eleven years now. But, I promise to keep going no matter what because I know that’s what you would have wanted me to do. I’ll be back soon, okay? I love you.”

—

“Urban?” Curse said while trying to get his attention. She hated the tension that was being the two of you and was trying to do her best to get you two to forgive each other. She felt that if she had never come into the picture that this would have never happened and didn’t want to be the cause of the two of you not being friends anymore. 

“Yes?”

“You need to talk to your best friend.”

“No, because I don’t have shit to say to her.”

“What the hell is wrong with you?”

“Yasmin!”

“No, no and NO! The two of you have been friends for ten years and you need to give her a chance to explain why she’s so protective over you since uh NONE OF YOU HAVE. All of you just jumped down her damn throat and cornered her and that was not fair! How can you be mad at her when you don’t even have the full story?”

“There is literally no excuse for her acting how she does.”

“And you know that, how?”

“Like I said she always acts as if the world revolves around her and if she doesn’t get her way she has a damn fit.”

“But how can you get mad when you would literally go right along with her shit too? You would always be right there in the thick of it. You and Jack. And oh, the way you talked to him on the phone a few weeks ago? What the fuck was that? Like the level of disrespect you were showing to her and to him are unacceptable. THEY’RE YOUR BEST FRIENDS.”

“You’re supposed to be on my side!”

“Well, newsflash Wyatt, I’M NOT. Because you’re the one that’s in the wrong. Jack should have kicked your ass for disrespecting her and I just might do it myself!”

“So it doesn’t bother you that we probably wouldn’t still be together if left up to her?”

“You are so dramatic and you need to give her the benefit of the doubt. So here’s my thing. Do not talk to me until you have talked to her first and have made up because the last thing that I’m going to do is come in between a friendship that has lasted as long as the two of you have.”

“WHAT?!”

“Your phone is right there. Call her.”

“But…”

—

Jack had convinced you to come to Louisville to spend time with him and PG and you had finally agreed. 

You just didn’t want to have to run into Urban even though you knew that it was inevitable.

All of PG was staying at you and Jack’s house and since it was so big, you kind of had a plan in order to be able to avoid him.

You had been there for a few hours and PG had been excited to see you when you had walked in the door. Shloob actually didn’t let you go for several minutes earning Jack to be annoyed with him.

All of you would be going to a football game later so you were simply laying down in your room trying to distract yourself with watching videos on tik tok when there was a knock on the door.

“Come in.” You replied and Urban slowly walked into the room.

“Uh hey.”

“Hi.” You responded while barely glancing at him.

“Can we talk?”

“Not if you’re going to yell at me and dismiss me. If that’s the case you can turn right back around.”

“I want for this to be over with and I want to give you a chance to explain since I literally never did and Yasmin threatened me. I already talked to Jack so the only one left is you.”

You sighed before responding and Urban sat down next to you.

“I had a best friend before you when I lived in Atlanta and before I moved to Louisville. Her name was Autumn.”

“Was?” Urban asked while looking at you.

“She was two years older than me. We did everything together and we were very protective of each other. People would tend to pick on me in school because I was the smallest and of course Autumn would be right there to kick their ass. When I was 13 and she was 15 she started seeing this guy who happened to be a bit older than her. He always rubbed me the wrong way, but she was happy and I didn’t want to ruin that. Long story short, she wanted to go to a party with him and I said okay and she wanted for me to cover for her and say that we were having a sleepover at my house. They went to the party, he got drunk, she was tipsy herself so didn’t think too much of it as they were getting ready to leave. It was a head on collision and he was going almost 120 miles an hour. It literally happened a block up from our street. If I would have said something then she would probably still be here. That’s why I’m so protective of all of you, especially you. I’m not losing anyone else.”

“I… why didn’t you tell me?” Urban asked in disbelief trying to comprehend what you were saying. 

“I don’t like talking about it for obvious reasons and you really didn’t give me a chance to explain, you just shut me out.”

“But that’s important, Y/N. You’ve carried that for eleven years! Does Jack even know?”

“No.”

“Then who does know?!”

“Danielle, Nicole, my parents, and now you.”

“Y/N…..”

“It’s fine, Urban.”

“No, it’s not fine!”

“What are you going to do? Bring her back? Nothing will ever be able to fix this and it’s all my fault.”

“But, it’s not your fault!”

“Yes it is. Because I didn’t say anything. The look that her parents gave me when I was explaining everything to the police? They would have rather seen me dead because of what I did or in this case what I didn’t do.”

“You were a literal child, thirteen.”

“They didn’t care. Her mother looked at me in actual disgust and said it. ‘It should have been you instead of her’. Of course my parents weren’t having it and it was just a mess. I’m done talking about this. I can’t…”

You felt your eyes watering and immediately hopped up to lock yourself in the bathroom and Urban was quick to follow behind you.

You had closed the door and locked it before he could get to you. 

“Y/N, come on just…”

“No, Urban. Just…. I hope you forgive me but I need to be by myself right now.”

“Of course I forgive you and I’m sorry for how I acted. That is literally the last thing you need! I’m always here for you, you know that!”

“As of lately you haven’t been!”

“I.. I know and I’m trying to do everything I can to make it right. I’m sorry I shut you out when you needed me the most. I hope you can forgive me for that. I am always ready to kick someone’s ass when they make you cry, but I’m the one that has been the cause lately.”

You didn’t answer and Urban could hear your faint cries from behind the door and couldn’t help but to feel like shit. 

The football game was underway and you were hanging out with Danielle and Nicole as Jack, Urban and everyone else was on the sidelines.

Jack knew that Urban was going to attempt to talk to you and decided to ask how it went since neither of you had told him anything.

“Urb?”

“Hmm?”

“Are you and baby girl good now?”

“Yes I think so, but….”

Urban was hesitant, but he knew that he had to be honest with his other best friend.

“But what?”

“I… it’s not my place to say what she told me. Just.... you need to talk to your wife.”

“Okayyyy is it good or bad?”

“Jack, you just have to ask her about it but I will say that I’m really worried about her. She’s been holding onto that too long and shouldn’t have had to carry that by herself. Safe to say that I felt even more shitty when she told me and she is definitely putting on a front right now. She’s hurting.”

“I’ll make sure to talk to her tonight after we leave and I can tell. She keeps saying that she’s fine, but I know better.”

Meanwhile, you were trying to stay warm as the sun had gone down and regretting your outfit choice. Jack noticed and quickly embraced you.

“Too busy wanting to be cute and not thinking about being warm, huh?”

“Shut it, Jackman. You like the view so stop it.”

“I admit that I do.” Jack responded while leaning down to kiss you.

“Ohh, I need another one.” You said reaching up to meet him halfway.

“Will you two stop trying to make children in front of my eyes?”

“Nicole!”

“Did I lie?!”

You rolled your eyes and simply ignored her as you wrapped your arms tighter around your husband.

“Mmm, you’re so warm.”

“Baby girl?” Jack leaned down to whisper in your ear so that only you would be able to hear him.

“Hmm?”

“I think my wife deserves a nice warm bath when we leave so she can sleep better.”

“Only if you join me.”

“Say less, my baby. I’ll make sure to warm you right up.”

“HEY! WHAT ARE YALL WHISPERING ABOUT OVER THERE?”

“GROWN FOLKS BUSINESS, NICOLE, DAMN!” Jack yelled back at her and she rolled her eyes.

“You got one nosey ass older cousin. I swear she has it out for me.”

“As long as you don’t mess up she’ll leave you alone.”

“I highly doubt that and tell Clay to stop making faces behind me.”

“HOW DID YOU KNOW?!”

“We’ve literally been brothers for how long? I’ve learned your tricks and back up from my baby.”

“Y/N, you know I can get the divorce papers drawn up right now so you can sign them.”

“CLAY! REMOVE YOURSELF!”

“Leave my favorite Harlow child alone!”

“Mamas, I flew you down here to see ME, not him!”

“Oh, I thought it was a 2 for 1 type of situation.”

“BABY!”

“Love you smush.”

“I’m beginning to think that you don’t.”

“Lies you tell and oh can you make me some hot chocolate when we get home?!”

Jack couldn’t make a lot of things, but knowing how much you loved hot chocolate, when he was eighteen he perfected it for you. If he doesn’t make it, you don’t drink it and yours was never as good as his.

“You want me to do what? After you, Clay, and Nicole want to terrorize me? See yourself out Mrs. Harlow.”

Just then you leaned up to whisper in Jack’s ear.

“I’ll let you facefuck me.” Just then Jack’s eyes went wide and he got a small smirk on his face. 

“What flavor you want? Caramel? White chocolate?”

—

As promised, Jack had made your hot chocolate and you requested caramel tonight and white chocolate tomorrow. Now your back was resting against Jack’s chest in the bathtub of the master bedroom in a comfortable silence until Jack broke it.

“Baby girl?”

“Yes, smush?”

“I asked Urban earlier if the two of you were okay and he said for the most part yes, but that there was something else. He wouldn’t tell me because he thought that it wasn’t his place to do so and that he’s worried about you.”

You were quiet and didn’t say anything.

“Mamas? I want for you to be okay and I know that you aren’t, I can’t help you if you don’t let me.”

“Her name was Autumn.”

“Was?”

“She was my best friend in Atlanta before I moved to Kentucky. We lived next door to each other, although she was two years older than me we were inseparable. I was the smallest in my grade and if anyone said anything about it she would be quick to defend me. We were extremely close and did everything together. I remember us planning out our weddings and how we would be each other’s maid of honor and name our first born after each other. We were going to go to college together, have an off-campus apartment. Literally everything was planned out. So, when I was thirteen and she was fifteen, she started seeing this guy. I didn’t really like him and he was a bit older than her. I never said anything because she was so happy and I didn’t want to ruin anything for her. So, one night there was a party and he had invited her to go. I didn’t want to be anywhere near him so I declined. I would cover for her saying that she was sleeping over my house so that she would be able to go. He got drunk and so did she and he made an attempt to drive back to my house to drop her off. He was going 120 miles an hour and crashed only a block away from where we lived and she died on impact, while he lived. That is why I am so protective of all of you, but especially Urban. I lost one best friend before and I don’t plan on losing another one, all because I didn’t speak up when I could tell that something was wrong. Our house in Atlanta is close to where she’s buried and I did that on purpose to be close to her. At the end of October every year, I go and visit her and do all of our favorite things and watch all of our favorite movies. That’s why I go missing and you see that I’m sad. That’s where I was when you called me the other day. I talk to her and update her about what’s going on and I just wish she could have gotten to experience this life with me. You have Urban and all I want is to have Autumn.  I mentioned the other day that I feel that she sent you to me to protect me when she no longer could. We met on the first anniversary of her death. And remember that dream I had? When I mentioned that it showed our wedding and we hadn’t even met yet? Autumn was literally in it smiling at me. Sorry to put all of this on you. Danielle had been encouraging me to tell you, but I wasn’t ready. I hate talking about this and you obviously understand why. Her mother actually looked at me after I got done explaining what happened to the police and said that she wished that it was me that got killed instead.”

“Y/N, first of all never apologize. I’m here for you, always here for you. You’re my wife and I want for you to be okay. I can understand why you never mentioned this because it’s a lot but keep in mind that I’m always here to listen to you and I’m never going to turn you away. You were thirteen and the fact that an adult is wishing death on you? It makes more sense why you’re so protective and why when certain things happen you blame yourself even if it had nothing to do with you. I see why Urb said he was worried about you and he mentioned feeling even more shitty after you had told him.”

“I’d do anything to bring her back.”

“I know, mamas.” Jack answered while placing a kiss on your temple.

“I know she doesn’t blame me or anything since she visits me in my dreams periodically and has told me herself but I can’t help but to blame myself.”

“Knowing what you just told me, that is probably the last thing she wants. She would want you to pursue all of those promises that you made to one another.”

“I know.”

“How about this? You make Autumn your maid of honor for our wedding in December and we’ll have a special place for her.”

“Really?”

“Of course, baby. She’s important to you so she’s important to me.”

“The next time I visit her I have to thank her for bringing me to you.”

“How about I come with you?”

“I know she would love to meet you.”

Liked by jackharlow, urbanwyatt, privategarden, lilnasx, saweetie, danivalentine, sza, theestallion, and 5,283,032 others

y/ninsta: my sweet Autumn, I hope I’m making you proud. This is one of my favorite pictures of us. I promise to keep pursuing my dreams and to keep the promises that we once made each other. Not one day passes when I don’t think of you and think about what the future would have held for us. It’s getting easier to talk about you, but eleven years feels like yesterday to me. Thank you for sending jackharlow and privategarden to protect me when you weren’t able to do it yourself anymore. 

Continue to rest in peace to the best friend that I could have ever asked for.

I love you and hope it won’t be too much longer until we see each other again 💖

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#jack harlow #jack harlow x reader #jack harlow x black reader #jack harlow angst #jack harlow fluff #jack harlow concepts #jack harlow fic #jack harlow fanfic #urban wyatt #urban wyatt x reader #urban wyatt x black reader #urban wyatt angst #urban wyatt fluff #urban wyatt concepts #urban wyatt fic #urban wyatt fanfic

[sammydem0n64]

It’s 12 AM BUT DIALTOWN OC MOMENTS?? 😦😦😦😦😦

I’ll give some info about her under the cut bc I like yapping

Her name is Anais Everett and she's an aspiring model, AND a datable alongside her partner Dior! (POLYAM ROUTE???????, typewriter head only bc they're both lesbians)

Her gist is that she’s an aspiring model, and despite her kind, gentle and sweet personality, she’s EXTREMELY ambitious and loves to take risks. This mainly shows in her model career since she hates following trends to gain popularity and wants to forage her own path. This ultra independence and her willingness to do ANYTHING but follow in the footsteps of others has its positives and negatives! Just as long as she doesn’t go too overboard, yeah?

The basis of her and Dior’s route is that they have different approaches to achieving their dreams (you’ve already heard how Anais wants to be original no matter what, Dior’s the exact opposite in that they’re brash but refuse to try anything original in fear of losing popularity), and the player has the choice to help the gfs out through getting a modeling gig. But if you lean too hard into one’s philosophy (like you focus entirely on Anais’ strive for originality and doing crazy shit to get famous) you’ll get bad endings!!! You gotta help them both find a balance in their work!!!

For basic facts:

-She’s 26 and a Polyam lesbian (as stated before !), she/her pronouns exclusively

-She‘s the caretaker for her sickly and aged aunt. Her aunt used to be a fashion design and have Anais her interest in the modeling industry in the first place! The two of them are incredibly close

-She has a pet bunny named Lily of the Valley (Lily for short)

-Her head is a Sony Mobile Phone which has a keyboard that slips out. She CAN slightly control when the keyboard comes out so she can text others, but otherwise it slips out without her consent when she’s experiencing strong emotions!

-Her fleshhead design’s hair is just dyed. I imagine she’s a natural brunette

-Doesn’t have. The best relationship with her parents and cousins but oh well, her aunt is the only family who matters to her anyways o7

-I haven’t imagined how she’d interact with the canon characters much, but I think she’s THISSSS close to body slamming Lil Billy. She’s tired of being the bigger person and being nice. She wants to go ape shit. HDJDHDJS

-ALSO MAC ORIGINALLY DESIGNED HER. @/ALPACABABS MADE HER I JUST ADOPTED HER LOL maybe go on Mac’s Toyhouse and adopt some of his other designs!!! Teehee

#She’s soooooo <3 #my art #demon’s ocs #art #artists on tumblr #Dialtown #dialtown oc #object head #Had to get this. out of my system HEJDJS

[nutzworth]

today begins my homestuck reread. i wanted to start it yesterday january 1, 2024 but i got busy. so we begin today

PREFACE: i wanted to download the unofficial collection and read it thus, but it didnt WORK cus of my accursed mac. so. im on the unofficial collection website. also i debated on how exactly to do my liveblogging and decided on actually liveblogging in my friend's discord server and then translating the day's reading to text on tumblr. so!

DAY 1: JANUARY 2, 2024

STATS: read for ~3 hours pages read: 1-381. 380 pages slur count: 3. john, rose, dave. all r slur silly count: 3. jade, rose, rose. jade about dave; rose about herself piss count: 1/3. howie mandel strikes again

THOUGHTS:

ive found a lot of overlooked aspects of especially john and dave. whether or not these are "i never noticed she was holding corn on the plate!" encanto aspects or not is undecided. people tend to interpret john as having eaten cake his whole LIFE when instead it was just on 4/13 because it was his birthday. dave has A BUNCH of ironic blogs and websites that he never shows. ive only seen sbahj and his personal blog so that was kind of a shocker to me. thats all the overlooked aspects i guess lol in addition to john talk: all of his dad's harlequin merchandise is soooo cute. i wouldnt be annoyed if my dad put all this harlequin stuff in my house theyre so silly and bright dave is REALLY ANNOYING. i kind of forgot. he sounds so different from how he sounds later in the comic and how he does in my head. he does a rap in the pages i read and the first part was good but the second part was bad. rose and her relationship with her mom is JUST like me fr...... ugh. rose is so me but if i was like way pettier. something about them strikes me. mommy issues i guess. being spiteful towards your mother when your mother is just trying her best. something. oh well i was thinking about the strilondes and their conceptions of irony and its been affecting how i interpret the text. dirk and rose get irony; dave and roxy do not. dave tries to mimic what he sees in bro, but only scratches the surface of true mind games. he fails at being ironic, though he is cool i guess (for other reasons). rose interprets her mother's vaccuuming as an "ironic housewife routine" which broke my heart. rose gets irony; roxy does not. (this is also how their one-sided passive aggressive one-upmanship operates. rose is ironic; roxy is not). ive also been keeping track of the times in canon which is also corn on the plate level but whatever. johns doing this all at FIVE PM. brother thats dinner time for me. a meteors coming for you and youre playing this game and suddenly youre in another dimension and its FIVE THIRTY! ugh. daves like oh man i gotta fight my bro to get a sburb game to save my buddy rose and its like SEVEN PM! jesus! so night time. some dirk and dave mirrors: manbro bukkake theater. didnt notice dave said that?!??! ben stiller instead of rainbow dash above the closet door. awesome. sylladexes and fetch modii are crazy and i think its so interesting how hussie focuses on them so much in these first acts. i saw something a while ago about how fetch modii mirror people's thought processes and thought it was cool. dave thinking STOP! = 7 and then that releasing his sword (in 7 spot) was really cool. i love fetch modii they make no sense also some pages havent been working and its kind of driving me up the wall :-/ some flashes dont have sound and daves sound mixer DIDNT WORK AT ALL! but thats fine rather that than one of the gaming flashes where you walk around.

think thats it for today. thanks everypony

#me #nutzworth hs reread #im not tagging this homestuck. i cant do that to the populous

[thehouseofmorningstar34]

Agoraphobia Trait

Hello, my name is Sara I have Agoraphobia. I've been dealing with it for the last 3 years. I wanted to create a Trait for fellow people who struggle with it as well. However, I wanted to make light of the situation but still bring awareness to panic and anxiety disorders like mine. I can’t tell you how many times I have been told it’s all in my head or it’s not real. On that note, please enjoy the trait and the titles of the buffs. I hope they make you chuckle like they did for me. Also, I wanted to link resources for mental health help if you are every feeling anxious or depressed or any emotion really you are never alone don't forget that.

Thehotline.org (a safe and effective way for victims of dv to get out safer than ever)

Humantraffickinghotline.org (you can text 23373 or call 1-888-373-7888 it also has the quick exit button as well.)

Thetrevorproject.org/get-help/ (a lgbtqia safe hotline for at risk teens and young adults to reach if you are feeling suicidal or need assistance)

And always there is the 988 lifeline.org where you can get a hold of the mental health and crisis Network hotline all you got to do is text 988 and chat with a lifeline right away.

Don't ever feel like you're a burden or you deserve anything that you are going through You are not alone and I hope these resources help 💘

Now Let's talk about the trait:

This trait has 6 buff replacements and 9 proxy buffs. (More to come)

3 custom interactions (still don't know how that works well yet lol)

The links provided are up to date

I removed the fears that were wrong and made it into a proxy buff.

Also with your needs decays all in general will go down slower for all your needs for your Sims by 1.3. (cuz why not)

This trait is up to date with the latest patch (PC: 1.105.332.1020/ Mac: 1.105.332.1220)

Also, with this trait your social decay goes down a lot slower because Agoraphobics we normally don’t want to be social with outside people.

💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞

My TOU:

If you decide to download and use any of my content, please don't post them on any other sites.

Do not put them behind a paywall site.

Please if you want to credit me on any posts, I would like to see what trouble your Sims get into with my content.

And please don't alter or repackage my files in any way

Thank you and enjoy

💓Downloads right above 💓

How to download

Place both files in your mod folder 📂

Your mod folder is in your documents of Electronic arts files make sure to look there 🙂

Since it is a script file it can not be more than one folder deep in your mods folder

If you have any issues please dm me

PLUR 💞

🎇UPDATE: I APOLOGIZE TO THOSE WHO DOWNLOADED MY MOD I SAW THE CUSTOM INTERACTION THING AND NOW IM FIXING IT NOW MY BAD 🎇 (first time modder)

#simblr #the sims mods #the sims cc #the sims community #the sims 4 #the sims #sims 4 #my sims #my simmies #sims #sims 4 cc #sims 4 community #sims screenshots #sims4cc #simsfileshare #agoraphobia

[frownyalfred]

The thing about Borderline is that every time i go to reread it, I get to the first sentence:

Bruce’s knees hit the ground before his coffee.

and it hits me like a mac truck and i just have to take a minute to breathe after that and i'm slammed with emotions from the get go, my half-broken visual processors giving me an image Immediately without having to Work for It, and my writer brain, before it even remembers that i know this story, goes "man, what a hook" and my reader brain, before it remembers which story this is, goes "fuck, i'm already emotionally invested" and just

i always need a few minutes to just breathe after that. And then ADHD brain takes over and switches tabs and I don't get back to rereading it until much, much later.

But hot damn what a line.

Ahhh thank you! It was another one of those hooks that came to me late at night and I just couldn't stop until it was written down. That first chapter I literally wrote at midnight in the ao3 text box, then I went to bed.

Thank you so much for reading! I know it's a lot, trust me. As the author sometimes I'm like "yeah that's too much" and I go update another story lol.

#asks #anon #myfic #theresurrectionist #borderline

[magic-aggy]

the original mlpfim lesbian ship

text id (never done one of these b4 pls let me know if im doing it wrong!)

[on the left, a fat, dainty, white unicorn with purple hair, looking flirtatious, with text indicating her that says "Trying her hardest to flirt", on the right a wiry, muscular, orange earth pony with blonde hair and brown spots like a cow looking stressed and distracted, text pointing to her that says "Oblivious, lost in thought about work she needs to do"]

uhhh, figured i needed to practise my character design somehow. redesigning official characters seemed like a good start.

idk how evident it is, but i tried to put like, some vibes of other animals into the designs for the purpose of like, trying to communicate character?

like rarity's snout/face/ear is meant to evoke a siamese or ragdoll cat, as well as an alpaca. her legs are def meant to evoke an alpaca, or maybe a poodle. shes trim and prim and manicured. alpacas tie back to fashion, w their wool being used for high end woolen clothing. and a ragdoll is a very like, iconic big pretty cat which is both elegant and very fluffy. i wanted rarity to be fat and elegant. i think i achieved that. her hair is not as good as id like but its good enough. also gave rarity a G1 style cutie mark bc its a classic look and rarity can appreciate a good bit of vintage style, plus her larger body made me think of the G1 pony toys. and i just really like big cutie marks lol.

applejack i wanted to put vibes of australian outback sheep farmer into, as well as fruitbats and australian sheepdogs. i wanted her to be muscular but not thick and overt like big mac. applejack always seems like she should be wiry and lithe. shes not the strongest pony in the world, but she might be the hardest working pony. also her snout being slightly canine ties back to the timberwolves, which for whatever reason i really associate with applejack. winona too! winona is part of the inspo here. and then i put some splotches of darker fur bc i A. wanted to continue evoking a blue heeler, but B. more importantly i wanted her to be part cow. i have this mental image of Pear Butter, her mom, being half cow and being like, very round and fat and soft and pretty. hair is cut short and a bit scruffy, bc long hair seemed impractical to me. i always think about how much applejacks hair would get in the way if things were more grounded. also she has a cow lick! and her hair is less bright, more of a dirty blonde. which just felt fitting. i imagine applejack as having rough skin from all the time she spends working in the sun.

also rarijack is just, the OG, the first thing i was like 'omg those horse fillies, theyre so gay... wow...' its a classic.

#applejack #rarity #my little pony #mlp #rarijack #hashtag blogging with aggy #horse drawn art

[fruttymoment]

Whoa linux user

Do you have a guide on how to switch to it? I have zero coding knowledge (i think that's required) and I trust you with my life

I perfectly understand the "linux is scary and requires very big brain and coding its too hard to use!" thought coming from a Windows/Mac guy, i really do! But in the end, a linux distro is just a computer kernel that also has a desktop environment and just does what you want it to do like an operating system

Coding on linux is not required. Linux has so many distros at this point that designed to be beginner friendly, requiring "no knowledge but TO gain knowledge while using it"

The linux terminal is the thing that scares most of the users, but trust me once you get used to it you'll realize how efficent it is to operate your computer and do certain tasks from THE terminal instead! In the end, the cold looking white text with black background terminals are the REAL face of computers. Desktop environment is made so EVERYONE can use computers!

The terminal of gnu/linux uses the bash language. In a nutshell, it is pretty easy to learn basic commands actually!

Super beginner friendly linux distros are designed for people (YOUU) who has no experience whatsoever with linux! They are designed and engineered so you dont have to use the terminal much! For example, Linux Mint is the best distro you should start with. It looks and feels like Windows, even! And Mint does not require much terminal usage. That is also their mission, to make an linux distro friendly enough that no terminal usage is needed!

As easy as this sounds, i actually do not recommend staying this far away from the linux terminal. Please start with Linux Mint if you gonna, its just the best for beginners, but also please dont avoid the terminal much! The linux terminal is important to learn because it also teaches you how a computer really works, and certain operations are much more efficent to do via terminal anyway!

Push yourself to interact with the terminal, even. Learn very basic commands like "shutdown now" , and the "sudo" privilege and how it works (linux always asks your password while doing stuff and you also cant do muc without the sudo privileges!)

"sudo" is the command that gives you the REAL admin privileges to do ANYTHING. With your password and sudo, you can even delete your bootloader lol. Linux wont stop you

This means to be extremely careful while using sudo, though! You can do ANYTHING with sudo privileges, and that also contains accidently trashing your computer! Unlike Windows, that doesnt even let you uninstall Edge, linux has no boundries. Its like "we are gonna assume you know what you are doing."

Of course, friendly distros DO warn you on certain stuff, so dont worry too much!

So ye. U can use linux with no coding knowledge, but i dont recommend staying like that. After starting to use linux, you GOTTA let it teach you stuff!

And to the "switching to linux for the first time" part;

I recommend not deleting your main Windows, actually. For first time using linux i heavily recommend the "dual booting" , which simply means booting operating systems more than one in an computer! You can use BOTH linux and windows in thay way! Although, you need to shudown your pc if you want to switch between them and do it in the booting menu

This is because if something goes wrong, or you get very confused, just let Windows be ready in there. Only make the switch the moment when you feel you can operate linux with no issues and easily!

Dual booting basically slices your disk and creates partitions for operating systems. For example if you have an 512GB SSD, in dual booting you can slice it and make Windows use 256GB and Linux use 256GB too! Ofc u can change the numbers here (linux mimt will help u,.)

Before completely switching to linux; be aware that its a bit of a different world. Sure, very popular softwares exists in linux too but some softwares may not suppor linux. Adobe products dont support linux, for example! You can of course just emulate them with Wine software heh, but that would be a bit of a work!

Another problem will be certain online games. Online games does not like linux becuse how easy it is to manipulate the system, so they just either dont run on linux or they ban/kick you when you try to emulate it on linux

An example is Valorant. Valorant does not tun on linux!

And any online game that has a cheap anticheat system will be a problem!

With that being said, linux now supports every single game from Steam, with the Proton software. Just be careful about them online ones! If an online game natively supports linux (TF2, for example!) , it wont be a problem! Check the steam game's info thingy for it!

Oh and official Minecraft works in linux lol

Discord, Spotify etc. popular softwares also work on linux!

Linux in fact has an "app manager" software in their distros, making you install stuff with no terminal whatsoever! Think like Google Play Store but on le pc!

Anyways hehe thats it fo me bascallya! If u wanna switch to linux with no experience, start with the Linux Mint distro i say and explore it well! Tamper everything before fully installing it, dont worry about it! Linux is free. Linux does not care if you want to kill the entire system, even. Linux is freedom

Also please research the dual booting! You'll gonna be needing an 4GB+ USB for it, and a software like Rufus!

The site of Linux Mint has everything you need in detail, step by step ^^ good luck!

[toomuchracket]

dword girlie is currently at home on the couch crying and spamming his text with “why would you do that” about his hair

PLEASE yeah you're with mrs mac and her babies and you're literally sitting sniffling playing with eilidh's hair to keep calm - she literally turned to you when she saw matty's hair on the live and offered her own for you to put into plaits or whatever, sweet kid lol. but yeah, the texts you send your man are like "why would you do that i thought you were kidding. our baby is going to be here soon and the first thing she's going to see is her father BALD i can't even believe you matthew. think of your daughter!" and then like half an hour later "you look fit though" loooooooool. because he does. lbr. that is a hot man <3

#mads answers asks #matty asks #fluff asks #d word matty #literal d word #eilidh

[bwoahtastic]

Trophy cheetah wife Max being brought to a really fancy event/dinner for the first time ever! Rico never showed Max, not in words or texts, so everyone is shocked when a cheetah stands in the VIP line, without a collar or muzzle.

Max doesn't care though because he hates to wait for Rico to get done with the bathroom trips, so he kinda hisses when Rico comes back but immediately goes all chirpy again when Rico kisses behind his ear.

At the event, many people ask Rico how much "that cheetah" costs him, thinking that he got Max at an auction or so. When Rico tells them that Mac costs his heart (he's so fucking cheesy when talking about Max), they're shocked. An animal human is as low as a normal animal, so how could a prestige man say something like that?!

Oh, and Max night wear a pretty flowy dress with a small boob and stomach window, just to look even more alluring and sexy for Rico!

Oh pls!

Max just standing in the VIP line as he waits for Rico to come back from the bathroom (which takes too long *grumpy cheetah noises*) and everyone is confused because the cheetah Omega has no leash or muzzle and what is he doing in the VIP line of all places??

Rico coming back and walking up to Max, who grumbles a little and presses his ears back cos rico is slow lol. But plss Rico kissing behind his ear and Max let's out the cutest chirping sound and instsntly presses close to his Alpha!

Everyone thinking Rico bought Max but Rico is just head over heels for the cheetah and they are a beautiful couple🥺

Max also in a beautiful dress with some cutouts around his stomach to show off the spotty fur on his tummy and rveryone has to admit he is gorgeous, but no one understands why Rico has a "lowly" animal as partner

#asks #oh deer

[revlischarm]

I have some questions abou the noodle shop ghost au.

Would Morro be someone who when talking about someone, specifically say their physically/mentally tired or would he just say their tired?

You've mentioned Morro being recognised as Macaque's successor by spirits of something (I can't remember). Does that mean he gets Mac's powers? If he does, would Macaque have to seal away some of the powers like Wukong did with MK?

What is PIF's opinion on Morro? You know, with Morro's elemental power and stuff.

Would Morro even recognise the ninja at first when he meets them? You know, with their designs and stuff, when he last saw them they looked like their old designs. Would he recognise their voices (excluding Lloyd)? Would Wu immediately recognise his old student, no matter how much he's changed (physically and mentally)?

Let's say he meets the ninja and the ninja recognise him first, will they attack him out of reflex or something or will they leave it and wait until he does something that gives them reason to attack. Would Kai just immediately pounce of Morro without hesitation? Would Lloyd have a mental breakdown?

Let's say that Morro recognises the ninja first, what would he do? Would he have a mental breakdown or will he just exist the room silently?

What would the reactions of the LMK cast be lik? Would Wu and Macaque have a custody fight over Morro? Would Kai pick a fight with Red Son over "stealing his thing (Which is fire)"? Would Pigsy just look at all the ninja and decide that these are his kids now?

Those are all my questions. For now at least. You don't have to answer all of them but the questions I want answered the most is one and three.

Hooooooo boy. Okay. So.

1. Mentally tired more than anything, it takes a lot to wear Morro down physically—especially since they refuse to admit to such ever.

2. It’s a technicality! He’s technically recognized as Macaque’s, although it’s probably just Heaven trying to mess with Macaque for the fun of it lol. No, he won’t be automatically gaining Mac’s powers, anything Morro learns is something that Mac teaches them. As of season 4, Morro can only manipulate shadows visually, teleport via shadow, hide in shadows (to a small extent) and they’re currently working on figuring out like…shadow attacks. They don’t automatically get all of Mac’s powers. I need more information from whenever season 5 comes out about MK and his whole deal before I do anymore concrete Morro and Mac successor lore stuff.

3. Since I personally love the idea that Mac is sworn siblings with both DBK and PIF, I’m keeping that idea in. Morro and Red Son are cousins. PIF is like an aunt sorta. After the whole LBD stuff/DBK getting possessed that one time, they’re on better terms! Red Son can and will threaten the ninja if they show up that Morro’s under the protection of the Demon Bull family.

But yeah PIF and Morro vibing and you do not want to fight them. Combined, their wind powers are…a whole lot.

4. Morro would definitely recognize them. They’re very recognizable. Although in the fic that’s being worked on (heheheheh thank you coolest friend ever) and in my original ideas, Morro doesn’t meet the ninja first; the ninja end up interacting with the LMK gang beforehand who then realize from Morro’s previous descriptions that these are the Ninja (and because Jay mentions Ninjago) and one of them texts Morro as a forewarning and it really freaks Morro out. More to come on that, hehe.

And yeah they’d recognize Morro, his voice is the same and he’s still. Well. Morro.

5. Lloyd will not be having a mental breakdown because I don’t feel like that would be his reaction to Morro?? A reflexive panic, maybe, but Lloyd is still a ninja through and through. His first line of defense is actual defense. Put up a front of confidence and all that. Although you’re correct to guess that Kai is straight up trying to launch himself at Morro lmao

Although the LMK gang won’t exactly be very pleased about that hehehehe

The girls are fighting, y’all :]

6. Mental breakdown when they receive the text 100000%. Shadow-travels to Mac’s place immediately. Very upset and freaked out.

7. Everyone is fucking battling it out okay no one is safe. Although Wu is back in Ninjago for reasons. Anyways.

There’s gonna be a really awesome fight thing it’ll be great so look forward to hehe

#ninjago #lego ninjago #ask #revlis speaks #nsg #nsg au #noodle shop ghost au #noodle shop ghost

[3terna15unshin3]

Then Because She Goes

I wake up, love you, so love you, love you

★ Chapter 5 of 15, 4926 words

★ Matty Healy x Original Female Character

★ warnings: alcohol consumption

<< 4

25 December, 2018

The holidays were celebrated peacefully and with tons of food, in the Manansala family. Este’s mum and dad spent the day cooking all of her favourite Filipino food for an early Christmas dinner, then enjoyed a classic roast dinner the next afternoon on Boxing Day. 

Well-fed and happy to be back home to hang out with their family dog Dano (a mellow golden retriever, named after Este’s obsession with the film Little Miss Sunshine), she had a relaxing holiday. And, as much as the regressive feeling of staying in her childhood house sort of stressed her out, Este took advantage of her last couple of days off of work by not making many plans. 

That was until she got a message from Matty. He always hopped around for Christmas, since his own friends and family were messily dispersed between London and the north countryside. He and the rest of the band were allowed a holiday break from rehearsals, so he spent late December basking in the calm before the storm. Matty knew he’d eventually be in Manchester with some free time. So, he decided to send Este a text. 

Their conversation had graduated to iMessage after Matty suggested the idea that night in Kingston. As nice as their budding friendship had been, he found himself thinking of Este with affection. How she could make him laugh both on purpose and by accident, the way her hair sat lazily on the edges of her face, her love for books and her skill for allowing other people to experience what she feels when reading them. 

So, he considered maybe asking her on a date. But the idea of that scared Matty—the formality of asking, the possibility of rejection. When trying to assume if she felt the same way, he was coupled with uncertainty, but he reached out anyway.

Este

Tue, 25 Dec at 13:02 PM

Merry Christmas x

Free to grab coffee on the 28th? 6 ish?

I’ll be in town that evening, if u are up for it

Only a couple of messages were sent between them since the album release party. Este, of course, showered him in flattery after first listening to it, whole-heartedly impressed by his work. Since Matty’s drunk words were sober thoughts that night, he really did care about Este’s opinion of him. He bubbled with joy when reading her messages. If she was telling the truth, that is. But Matty didn’t take her as a liar.

It had been busy for both of them; Matty was doing press for the month following A Brief Inquiry’s release and rehearsing for tour, while Este, Sam, and Oliver were dealing with the pre-holiday retail craziness. With that in mind, Matty was surprised to get a fairly quick response from her.

Este

Tue, 25 Dec at 14:10 PM

28th is my first day back to work :( off at 8 as usual

But we can do something afterwards if that's not too late?

And Merry Christmas to you too x hope you’re enjoying a break from the craziness

I am thank you !

I could just come by and hang out while u work bc I love it there Lol

Unless it’ll be busy I can just meet you there after close

That would be lovely! It’s always super slow the week after Christmas anyway

Everyone’s too busy raiding the big shops for the sales

ok cool I’ll probably show around 6:30

I need to chat to ur face about the album too :P

You’ve said enough about the album Este bloody hell

I don’t think I can take another compliment

Ego been fed enough lately?

Yeah actually thanks

Trying to learn how to be humble

Thank god x

✴ 28 December, 2018

A bay of colourful spines stared at Este as she stood in the Teen Fiction section trying to help a middle-aged mum find a book for her daughter. Every fragment of her teenage memories that popped into her mind felt outdated or not the right fit for the customer. 

“I find that she’s rarely challenged with the books she reads, you know? I want her to really fall into the trance of a novel, have it leave an effect on her. I don’t think a book has done that for her yet,” the mum explained passionately.

Este thought back to the moments she felt that way for a book. One she read a couple of years ago—when she was definitely too old to do so—came up. Its heavy subject matter and vast symbolism and imagery struck her. Her hands picked the familiarly bright blue book. 

“This one’s called Challenger Deep. I read it well into my twenties, but it explores topics I think other teen fiction writers refuse to explore. A little heavy, but for the right purpose. I think your daughter would love it, if she feels really deeply, like me.”

The mother, Orla, spent another 25 minutes chatting with Este about the intensity of being a teenager in the state of the world. A phenomenon the book shop worker never got sick of was getting a peek into the lives of the people of Manchester. Este felt like every time someone new walked into the shop, she got to know her city a bit better.

“Thank you again, Este. You’ve been lovely,” said Orla after checking out the novel for her daughter. Her boots then stepped out of the shop and into the breezy evening air.

The quiet day continued, piles of books slowly getting sorted through and reorganised. Matty, of course, was on her mind. Este watched the clock as 6:30 neared, but no text came through from him yet. She was hoping he wouldn’t catch her while deep in conversation with another customer, or (embarrassingly) struggling to carry a stack of books.

Once 6:50 rolled around, Este finally heard from him.

matty

Fri, 28 Dec at 18:49 PM

Sorry im already late

Just left late tbh

Lol ur fine

Do you like bubble tea??

You realise I’m Asian right???? course I like bubble tea

and you don’t have to bring anything! I’m okay

Omg you’re asian I would have ever guessed

Shut up and tell me your order

Matcha milk tea with pearls pls

Thank you xx

Ok gonna be even more late now but u know why so

Matty didn’t end up walking through the front door until quarter past seven. “There he is,” commented Este.

He held the two bubble tea drinks, one in each hand, raising them both in celebration. “I made it,” he said, handing her the green one. “Only 40 minutes late!”

After thanking him, Este took hers to the counter to set it down and puncture the top with the pointy side of the straw. Matty did the same. She looked at his drink, taking note of its purple colour. “You like taro?”

He looked at her, confused. “Yes? Should I not like taro?”

A laugh escaped from her lips and she shook her head no. “You should. I love taro. Just surprised, that’s all,” she admitted without elaborating. 

“You’re surprised because I’m white and uncultured and should be picking, like, strawberry or something, aren’t you?” 

“I didn’t say that.”

✴

Matty carried over a metal stool from the back room to set it next to the one Este sat on. Together, they sat behind the counter, sipping on their teas and chewing up the boba. 

“Can you let me say one more thing about the album? So I can just get it out and then move on?” asked Este. Matty sat on her left, fidgeting with the spinning seat of his stool, swivelling back and forth over and over; while she sat still and faced him fully.

“Okay, fine. This is your last chance.”

She smiled, happy to be able to get her last point out. “My favourite track isn’t Love It If We Made It, like you’d think.”

“Really? What is it then?”

“I Couldn’t Be More In Love.”

Matty looked back at her for a second, shocked. “Tell me why.”

“It sort of feels like being down on your knees and screaming at the sky. And it sounds really guttural. Your voice carries with so much urgency. I love its composition too, with the twinkly 90s sounding keys and saxophone solo and key change. It has all the elements of a standard, a perfected and refined sound—that almost holds down the rawness of the vocal.”

His swivelling gradually slowed to a halt as Este spoke. She had pointed out every aspect of the song that Matty loved, while her hands gesticulated in front of her, helping her process her own thoughts. Every word she used felt carefully chosen and placed strategically. It was refreshing.

“You know,” Matty started, with a smile of gratitude hanging from his mouth. “I recorded that vocal, like, a day before I went to rehab. So there was this hopelessness to them, and to be honest I sang it better after I got out. But it just felt right, so we left ‘em.” 

“That makes me like it even more,” Este replied shortly, chewing more pearls and looking at him with admiration. She sensed he had more to say, so she let him continue. 

“And not many people know, but it isn’t about a girl or romantic relationship. I wrote it about the idea of, like, what happens if all of this disappears—when nobody cares. Getting to do this thing, writing music, and having it personally affect people and being able to keep making more. It’s genuinely the one way I make sense of the world. Not even the fact that I have that vehicle to process my emotions but just knowing that it’s there. What happens when I’m not sure it’s there anymore?”

She let the information sit between the two of them for a beat. “Things always make sense when you’re the one explaining them.” They smiled at each other. “It’s comforting. Makes me feel hopeful. Like, if someone understands themself in this way then maybe one day I will too. An understanding deep enough to remain curious.”

He laughed, swishing around the straw in his close to empty bubble tea. Setting it down on the counter, Matty’s feverish hands reached for something else to twiddle with. A stack of sticky notes was in his hands, now ripping the yellow sheets into skinnier strips and connecting them end to end to make one long piece. 

“When I listened the first time, I obviously thought it was about a relationship. So it made me think of an ex of mine,” Este mentioned hesitantly, watching Matty toy with the paper, nervous to bring up what she was about to. “It was my first time, like, actually being in love. So after things didn’t work out, it was so hard for me to grasp just not loving her anymore. When all I’d done the whole time was love her. So that whole, ‘What about these feelings I’ve got?’ thing really hit me.”

Matty paused for a second, having a quick panic internally. Is Este gay? I thought Cate was the gay one. It was embarrassing to imagine beginning to pursue someone not interested in him, let alone anyone of his gender. If that was the case, their friendship would be just fine the way it is—but his infatuation felt too far gone to reverse. 

“That’s kind of where that line came from. And what I want people to feel when they listen. But when I thought about what it means to me, it wasn’t romantic at all,” he said. “Have you loved anyone since then?”

“No. Not in the same way. The true bisexual experience is having a huge pool of humans you could be attracted to and then not liking any of them. At least for me,” Este responded, bringing a light-heartedness back into her speech. Matty relaxed in reassurance and joined her in laughter. Bi. Good. Phew, even. “Was it easy? Figuring out your sexuality, I mean?”

She got up to walk over to the door and bolt it shut, flipping the sign to read ‘closed’. “In a way. Growing up, I thought the feelings I had for girls weren’t the same as the ones I had for boys, just because I thought they had to be different. Even though I knew they were there. And then I grew up—learning more and more—and things started to make sense. But it was never fully easy, or linear. Or definitive.”

She sat back down, continuing to watch Matty fold up the ripped paper. He brought one end of the strip of paper up and around itself. Using his fingers to flatten it, a small pentagon was formed, and he took the remaining length of paper to resume folding. 

“That’s sort of what I find so difficult about it,” he admitted. “So many people over the years have taken what I say about my sexuality and construed it to mean something concrete—when that’s just not how I see it.”

His thumb nail, one by one, made small creases in each side of the flat chunk of paper to create the recognisable five points of a star. Matty set it down, now complete, on the counter and slid it over to Este. She picked it up and rolled it in her fingers, replying while studying it and bringing it close to her face. “It’s for sure frustrating when people think they know you better than you know yourself.”

Matty grabbed another couple of sticky notes to start another star. “I’m kind of envious of people like you, you know. Who have it figured out. I have such a hard time letting myself truly feel things that I find myself coming millimetres close to understanding myself in a different way than before and then I just pull away at the last minute. Just in fear of not liking what I discover, or looking stupid. Which I should stop being scared of.”

“I don’t have it all figured out, not even a little bit.” Este ripped up a few papers to try and copy him but she failed. No words had been shared between them about the technique, since they were busy conversing, so she only had the visual aid of Matty making another in front of her. She gave up, letting him just hand over the second one for her to hold. “You being aware of that fear is enough understanding in itself, in my opinion.”

They sat quietly for a couple of seconds, Este finishing her last few sips of tea and tossing the empty cup into the bin. “Is that what Sincerity Is Scary is about? That fear?”

He looked at her, nodding to confirm her question. “The stupidity of that fear.”

“Wow, I should become a music journalist or something,” she joked, shocked that she got it right.

“Don’t get too ahead of yourself, darling.”

Matty made more stars as their conversation persisted. He varied the width of every strip of paper to make ones of all sizes. A pile of yellow origami accumulated. Este watched, still not understanding how it was done. She found it endearing—and quite cute—to witness the attention and effort he was putting into the mundane craft. 

“You hungry?” she asked, finding a lull in their discussions. 

He glanced up at the clock, seeing its hands pointing at 10:07pm. “Always,” agreed Matty. “In the mood for something specific?”

Este remembered that she had walked to work that afternoon, after lending her car to Cate for the day while hers was getting serviced. So, she considered places within walking distance from Greenhouse. “Piccadilly Tavern does some good food. Just down the road,” she suggested. 

“Sounds good to me.”

They gathered Matty’s collection of stars into the corner of the counter, while Este secretly hoped Sam would leave them there for her to be able to collect them again tomorrow, and then put on their jackets. His bubble tea was now empty and in the bin alongside hers. 

Small clicks were heard while the two walked around the shop to turn off the lamps. Then, they were out the door one after the other, Este locking up behind them, and taking off to the pub. Matty extended his arm, bent at the elbow, towards her. She noticed—confused at first—but eventually wrapped her own around it and came close to the warmth of his body. The air sat at a chilly 5°C, but it didn’t feel that way when they had the other so close. 

As the pub neared, Matty and Este observed its packed nature from the outside window. They had both forgotten the state of pubs on Friday nights. 

“I honestly don’t think we’ll even physically fit inside,” he said as they paused before the door. Their arms were still linked. Este had to stop herself from accidentally stepping on Matty’s foot.

“I’d suggest another place, but they do a great margherita pizza here and it’s kind of all I can think about right now,” she confessed. 

He chuckled. “We can takeaway?” Matty pulled the door open, and she went in, approving of his suggestion. 

The wait for a pizza to share was only 15 minutes and Este left her number to get a call when they were ready; so they sat on the curb outside to avoid the bustling building. Despite him protesting, she paid for the food. Matty had already bought the drinks from earlier, so Este argued that it only made sense for her to cover dinner. He gave in.

“Oh, I have news for you,” Matty mentioned vaguely. 

Este was curious. “News?”

“Yeah. I finished On Earth We’re Briefly Gorgeous last night.”

“Go on! How do you feel?” she eagerly pushed. Matty dragged out his thoughts with silence to build suspense, making her writhe in impatience. Este shoved his shoulder with hers to try and get his words out faster. “Seriously, if you have anything bad to say about this one I might have to walk away right now. That’s a warning.” 

“I think it’s my favourite piece of fiction I’ve read in the past three years.”

✴

The pub rang Este about their ready-to-go pizza in the middle of their conversation about On Earth We’re Briefly Gorgeous. They talked about Vuong’s words and what made them so poignant, and Matty even claimed that her annotations benefited his reading experience (and embarrassing her by referencing some of her notes verbatim). 

Matty offered to go inside to fetch their takeaway and carried it for the entirety of the walk to her flat, after they decided it was more sensible to go there rather than camping out in Greenhouse after hours. Plus, she knew that Cate would be staying over at Georgia’s for the night, so they’d have the place to themselves. By the time they got up to Este’s door, the food was still hot, since her flat was only a short walk from The Piccadilly Tavern. 

“Must be nice to live in this area. To be within walking distance to your work and all of the shops around Piccadilly and everything,” commented Matty. 

“Yeah. It's busy, though. And it makes it too easy to just stay in my little bubble and never leave.”

She held the door open for Matty and the pizza box to squeeze through, and he set it on the dining room table. 

“When I was in my early twenties—living here—I wouldn’t have ever wanted to leave,” he admitted.

Their jackets came off. 

“Water okay with you?” she asked, jug in hand. “It’s either that or wine. Choose wisely.” 

He opened up their takeaway, positioning the pizza so that they could share it, and then took a seat. “I mean… I’ve got no plans in the morning that a hangover could disturb. Do you?”

Este paused to think and then turned to pull on the handle of the drawer beneath the microwave, pulling out a corkscrew. Matty laughed at her non-verbal answer to his question and graciously accepted the glass of red she poured for him.

Their first bites of pizza hit the spot. Este wasn’t lying when she said the Tavern did a great margherita. They spent a couple of minutes eating, with small portions of conversation squeezing between their mouthfuls of pizza. 

“So what’s next year looking like for you? Touring the world?” she asked, stopping at her third slice. 

“Yeah, pretty much.” Matty wiped his mouth with a napkin before continuing. “We start with the UK in early January, bit of a break in February. Then, hopefully the Brits—if we’re nominated. Off to South America for some festivals, then Coachella and US tour through to June maybe? Coming back over during the summer for Big Weekend and a bunch of European festivals. Summer Sonic in Japan, Reading and Leeds. Australia and then Asia—I think ending it off with more US dates. All while writing and recording the next album, too.”

Este’s mouth hung open, struggling to conceptualise his crazy schedule. A whole year of travelling? Non-stop? It seemed impossible to her. She realised that it’s Matty’s job and that he’d done it before, so it must not be as scary to him. “Wow,” was all she could mutter out. 

“Yeah, I know,” he said with a chuckle.

“I don’t know if I’d survive that.”

“I barely did, last cycle. Did a bunch of smack, and stuff.” He sipped his wine and laughed. The glass was close to empty now. “But it’s worth it in the end."

She dusted the powdery flour accumulating on her fingertips into the corner of the box, considering the fact that it may be the last time she saw Matty for a while. It unexpectedly saddened Este. Conversing over text was fun and friendly, but moments like that first night; sitting on the couch and sipping beers in her flat, or drunkenly shouting at each other over the music in Kingston, and making origami stars behind the counter at Greenhouse, all made her realise how great his company was. Her attachment grew. Would their connection sustain through the year he was away? Does he even want it to sustain? she pondered.

“I’ll have to write down that crazy schedule on paper to break the news to my nan that you can’t attend her party,” Este joked. 

“When is it?” Matty asked. 

She could see a glimmer in his eye. Oh god. He wants to come, she thought. “No,” denied Este. “You’re not coming.”

A smile grew on his face as he realised she was onto his intent of asking. “Come on. Tell me when it is,” he insisted, playfulness evident in his voice.

“You’ll be on tour, Matty. I’m not going to make you show up to a banquet hall to celebrate my nan and granddad’s anniversary.” 

“It’s not ‘making me show up’ if she told you to invite me and if I want to go,” Matty argued. 

Este covered her face in embarrassment, with her elbows resting on the table in front of her, in disbelief that he wanted the information out of her. She spoke a ‘no’ but it was muffled by her hands in front of her mouth. He reached forward, pulling them away to reveal her face. In a flustered state, he noticed her mouth twitching up and down to try and stop a smile from showing up. Matty’s eyes found hers. He put on the biggest, corniest smile he could; eyes squinting, cheeks flexed, all teeth on display. Este couldn’t help but let her smile escape, Matty succeeding. She let out a laugh. 

“9th of February. Saturday,” she gave in.

Racking his brain for the specifics, he realised that the 9th was when he’d be off, after the UK leg and before South America. Matty couldn’t believe the coincidence, laughing to himself in bewilderment. “I’ll be in London.”

“For a show?”

“No. Home. Off, free. Perfect time to attend a dinner and dance event held in a banquet hall.”

She looked at him in disbelief. “Be serious please, Matty.”

“I am.”

Este shook her head, deciding to avoid the conversation and pouring them both another glass instead. And then she poured another, and another. It neared two o’clock in the morning, the both of them lounging comfortably on the couch together. The bottle of red was empty, a beer sat in front of each of them on the coffee table, and they were passing a now second and half-smoked joint back and forth. Crossed out of their minds, the previously deep and thoughtful conversations from earlier in the night were long gone. 

Matty found himself doing things like explaining, in detail, the (objectively, according to him) correct way to put shoelaces into a pair of Converse; which he didn’t know he was so passionate about until he caught himself talking about it for far too many minutes. Este happily listened, equally as tipsy and high as him, shooting back with random tangents of the same minuscule relevance. It was the most fun each of them had all week.

The influence in their system along with the late hour of the night forced any remaining walls between them to falter. Este reached and touched his knee in laughter a few too many times to go unnoticed by Matty. He watched her eyes linger at the ink on his forearms that poked out of his cotton shirt while he blabbered. Her hands constantly reached up to flip the gold dragonfly hanging around her neck, but she always did.

Likewise, she caught sight of him breaking eye contact more than ever before. It looked like he was looking down at her lips, but she wasn’t sure. The curls on Matty’s head were disturbed by his fidgety hands every few seconds. Este thought it looked nice when they were messy so she wouldn’t dare complain. 

“I feel like there's wet concrete behind my eyes when I try to close them and open them again,” he said to nobody in particular, obviously tired.

“That was a weirdly descriptive way to say your eyelids are heavy.”

“Yeah I know, but that’s what it feels like.” Matty clicked the power button on his phone and read the time. It was past three now. He flipped it around to show Este. “I think it’s bedtime.”

She stood up, reaching into the basket of miscellaneous throw blankets that sat in the corner of her living room and tossing one to Matty. It landed directly on top of his head and made him giggle. They were both smart enough to know that there was no way Este would let him leave this late, so she didn’t bother even asking him to stay. 

“Don’t be alarmed if you hear me get up a million times during the night. Wine makes me wee,” she warned with a slight slur to her speech. 

“Noted.” Matty untied his shoes to remove them before pivoting his legs onto the sofa where Este was previously sat, laying flat. “Thank you for the pizza. And wine, and weed. And for letting me stay over.”

“You’re welcome. Now you know what I get up to on Friday nights.” She took a cushion from the opposite end, near his feet, and then walked back to where his head sat. Standing behind the arm of the sofa, Este lifted his head to place it underneath. He looked up at her and uttered a small ‘thank you’. 

She smiled back and laughed. “Your face looks silly when it's upside down.”

He wanted to pretend to be offended but he was too tired to carry out the bit.

Este continued to potter around the flat, still wanting to clean up after their night by putting the scattered bottles and glasses near the sink and closing the pizza boxes from the table. When it was tidy, she made her way back over to Matty. “You’re okay with sleeping here? On the sofa?”

He nodded, barely awake. “Of course. Don’t worry about me, I’ll knock out as soon as I close my eyes,” he assured her. Este was about to turn towards her room when Matty grabbed her hand to stop her first. “Wait, before I forget. On Beauty and Being Just.”

She raised her eyebrows. “On beauty and being just what?”

“It’s an essay you should read. Been on my mind all night but I couldn’t remember the title and it’s only just now come back to me.”

Este promised to read it but was unsure if she’d remember what was called in the morning. Walking away, she switched off the big light, before the two of them said a final goodnight. Not bothering to change her clothes, she fell asleep soundly.

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