#flamin sad cheetos

[maxx0blu]

I believe in songs named after food supremacy

#songs named after food supremacy #food #diet mountain dew #flamin hot cheetos #sweet hibiscus tea #honeypie #ldr #lana #lana del ray #lana del slay #lana del gay #clairo #penelope scott #jawny #music i love #sadge #sadboi #sadgirl #sadenby #generaly sad #and then there's just honeypie lol #aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa #ah yes sharing my music taste to the internet #what a great idea #im putting much more effort to this than my own school works-

[johnsbleu]

Wait omg could u write a little snippet it of like when reader was prego and she was having those hormone lash outs and john trying to be understanding but so confused one minute shes crying the next shes mad

ask and you shall receive.

under the cut is something i just whipped up real quick. might not be exactly what you wanted but i wrote it with the amount of time i had. if i had more time, i probably wouldn't have stopped until it was 10k lmao

This is not the current timeline. It's from when she was pregnant with Ronan. John's POV, 2.3k words

“Okay, you got your list?”

Y/N holds it up and smiles, tilting her head back, “Thank you for going.”

I look out the window and see the rain coming down in thick windy sheets, “No reason you need to get all wet.”

“I can think--” she puts her head down and laughs, “Never mind. I shouldn’t finish that sentence.”

“Well, I think you should.” I say, and she looks at me. I give her a quick kiss, “I’ll be back. I love you. Call me if you need anything.”

She nods her head and salutes, “You got it, Wick.”

I take one last look at her before I pull the hood up on my coat and run out to the car.

__

I got more than what she wanted, but with it raining so much, I know that neither of us will want to leave the house. It’s the perfect weather to just lounge around and watch movies, plus it’s a little on the cooler side, so there’s currently a crock-pot in the kitchen full of chili. We’re going to have a date night in and watch a movie and each some chili. I can’t wait. I love my wife’s chili recipe too.

“I’m back,” I say, looking up to see Y/N coming into the kitchen, “I got everything on your list, and then some. I got…the Flamin’ Hot Cheetos and whipped cream cheese.”

Y/N hums loudly and reaches for it as I watch her in curiosity, “I’ve been thinking about this lately. Baby girl wants some spicy food. I love Cheetos, so I thought it would be good to try this.”

I watch as she opens the cream cheese, which she specified had to be whipped, not regular, then she scoops some of it up with a Cheeto. She takes a bites and chews a few times before scooping up some more. She scrunches her face up and looks at me, still chewing.

“Well?”

“Um, not really that great. I mean, it’s good, but it’s not as great as I thought it would be.” she says, scooping up more, “I’ll still eat it though.”

I laugh as I reach in and get a few more things out that she wanted. I set the ice cream down on the counter and smile proudly, but her face falls which makes my stomach sink.

“This is the kind you always get, isn’t it?”

“Yeah,” she says in a soft and quiet voice, “But it’s not the…it’s fine.”

I furrow my brow when I see her tearing up, “Baby, talk to me.”

“It’s not the kind I wanted,” she says, absentmindedly playing with the wrapper, and I stand there staring for a moment in pure confusion.

She is absolutely not the type of person to cry over the wrong ice cream. She’s the type to eat it anyway since it was bought. This isn’t the first time I’ve accidentally bought the wrong thing, but she’s never made a fuss about it.

“It’s the chocolate and peanut butter kind that you like,” I say, walking over to stand next to her, “You just wrote ice cream, so I thought--”

“Oh, right, it’s my fault! You had one job and it was to get the ice cream I wanted!” she says, then she puts her head down and cries harder, “Sorry! I’m not mad! I’m just…I’m a little sad. I didn’t want this kind.”

I place my hand on her back, “I can go back and exchange it. That’s no big deal.”

“No, it’s okay,” she says, despite the fact that she’s fully sobbing now.

She’s sobbing. Over ice cream. Surely there’s something else going on.

I don't know what to do so I just stand there like an idiot for a minute.

“I just really wanted that one brand we talked about, you know, the one that we tried.”

I furrow my brow as I look around, then it clicks, “Are you talking about when we went grocery shopping and they had samples?”

“Yeah!”

“Baby, that was over a month ago,” I say, but it just makes her cry harder. I immediately dig through the bag for the receipt and grab the carton of ice cream, “I’ll fix this. I’ll go get it for you right now.”

She shakes her head, “No, it’s okay. Really. I’m just being a baby.”

“No, you want what you want. I’ll be right back.” I kiss the top of her head and grab my keys off the table before quickly rushing back out to the car.

What my baby wants, she’s going to get.

I’m not even halfway down the street when I hear my phone ringing in my pocket. I dig it out and hold it to my ear.

“Everything okay?”

“You don’t have to go, John. It’s fine. I was just having a moment. I’m sorry.” she sniffles and laughs a little, “I’m sorry.”

I laugh, “It’s okay. I’m literally down the street from the grocery store. It’ll take me 10 minutes. I’ll be back before you know it. I’ll make sure to get the kind you want. What flavor?”

“Same flavor,” she says, and I start to laugh, “Just a different brand.”

“Okay, my love. I’ll be right back.”

I hear the smile in her voice when she says goodbye to me.

__

Despite the whole ice cream debacle a few days ago, things have been good. Y/N found a piece of fabric with a color she really liked for the baby’s room, so we ran into the hardware store to get it color matched. The problem was that they don’t do that at our tiny shop in Mill Neck. We were instructed to head to the big hardware store in Oyster Bay instead, which turned out to be good because I actually needed some new bolts for a few things. With a baby in the house soon, I want to make sure not a single thing falls off the walls. All of the furniture will be anchored to the wall in her room as well.

I’m not taking any chances.

“Excuse me,” a woman says, and I look over my shoulder at her, “Do you know where I can find water pumps?”

I shake my head, “No, I’m sorry. I’m not sure where that would be. I…I don’t work here.”

She laughs, touching my bicep, “I am so sorry. I just saw the dark blue shirt and assumed. I’m so sorry.”

“No problem,” I laugh, then I look up at the hanging signs above us that say what’s in each aisle, “If I had to guess, I would say bathroom stuff would be a few aisles down.”

“Okay, thank you.” she says, then she walks away.

I turn back to continue looking through the bolts, searching the size I need.

“What was that about?” Y/N asks, and I look over at her.

“Oh, she just wanted to know where water pumps would be.”

Y/N scoffs, “Water pumps. Sure.”

“Yeah, you know those pumps you put in your basement to get out water. I assume her basement flooded with all the rain we’ve had.”

“Yeah,” she says, then she scoffs again and looks at me, “I just knew this was going to happen.”

I furrow my brow and turn to face her, “What? They can’t do the paint here either? I guess we can go to Jimmy. I’m sure he knows someone who--”

“I just knew that once I got a belly and you would immediately not be interested in me anymore. I just knew you’d start to look at other women. You probably want a divorce."

I shake my head because I am confused. I’m standing here with boxes of bolts and screws in my hands, staring at my wife, so beyond confused. I just went on a 15 minute rant this morning about how beautiful she is, and I certainly didn’t go easy on her this morning when we were intimate. She’s sexy! She’s the sexiest she’s ever been, which is saying a lot because I’m fairly positive she’s the sexiest woman on this planet and that’s not a lie. I’m insanely attracted to her. I couldn’t keep my hands to myself before and I really can’t now.

“What are you talking about?” I tilt her chin up and look into her bloodshot eyes, “Honey, I am not looking at anyone but you.”

"Yeah, for now."

I tilt her chin up again, "You were there this morning. I know you know how crazy I am about you. I love you more than anything in this world, Y/N. You know this."

Y/N sniffles and closes her eyes as tears run down her cheeks, “I’m crazy.”

“You’re not crazy,” I say, bringing her into my arms, “You’re…”

She leans back and looks at me, narrowing her eyes, “I’m what?”

Her emotions have been all over the place. I’m not an idiot. I know what’s going on. Sure, when she freaked out about the ice cream the other day, I was confused at first, but then it all clicked into place. She’s hormonal and going through a lot right now. She cried over a laundry soap commercial on TV the other day, she got furious when they got our order wrong at lunch, which I will admit made me mad too since I reiterated many times that she didn’t want shrimp--she’s allergic and pregnant. She’s feeling everything on a much more intense level. I honestly feel bad. My wife always has such a cool demeanor and she’s always just relaxed and hanging out, but this past week has been rough!

“You’re feeling a lot of things right now and you’re not sure what to do with all those emotions.” I say as gently as I can since I don’t want to upset her, “Your body is going through a lot of changes right now.”

“I’m crazy, John.”

I laugh, “You’re not crazy, peach. You’re pregnant and feeling all of these emotions at once. It’s normal.”

I assume it’s normal. I don’t really know. I remember Tess was very emotional when she was pregnant.

Y/N stands back and exhales sharply, looking up at me, “I’m not gonna scare you away, am I?”

“Hell no,” I say, and she instantly smiles, “You could never scare me away. Not sure how thrilled you’ll be, but you’re stuck with me, peach. Forever.”

“Forever? Ugh, how horrid,” she jokes, then she wraps her arms around my waist, “I promise I’m getting better.”

I laugh, “You’re only six months pregnant. We have a few more months to go, so don’t make any promises.”

“Hey!” she playfully whacks my arm, “I’m trying! Give me a break. By the way, you did this to me!”

I laugh when she gestures to her belly, “Oh, I know. I actually like the little attitude you’ve been giving lately. Well, when it’s directed elsewhere. Not when it’s directed at me.”

“I’m trying not to direct it towards you, I hope you know that.”

Nodding my head, I smile, “I do.”

Y/N smiles, then it quickly fades, “I have to pee. Right this minute!”

I watch as she waddles a little and I grab the things I need before walking up to stand in line. I look around after a few minutes and see her coming back over to me with a huge smile on her face despite her red eyes. She links her arm around mine and tilts her head back to kiss me when I lean down. We walk up when it’s our turn, and the cashier glances at Y/N and furrows her brow a little when she sees her bloodshot eyes.

“Oh,” Y/N laughs, moving back a little to smooth her sweater over her growing belly, “Pregnancy hormones. I’m crying over everything. I cried over a laundry commercial the other day. The one with the little teddy bear. The little girl lost it but her dad found him, and he was all dirty, so he…took it and washed him and gave him…back.  I can’t even talk about it without getting choked up, oh my god!”

I look at her when she puts her head down, and I wrap my arm around her shoulder to pull her close. The cashier laughs and tells Y/N she’s not alone and that she was very emotional with her first baby too.

After I pay for our things, I take the bag and wrap my arm around Y/N’s shoulder as we walk out to the car. I smile when she watches me opening the car door for her, helping her in, then I rush back to the driver’s side.

“John, I’m serious,” she says, and I look at her, “I’m not always this crazy.”

“First of all,” I turn to her and take her hands, “You’re not crazy. Do you think that because you’re showing different emotions I’m going to think you’re crazy?”

She nods, “Yeah. I mean, I know that I’m pregnant but one minute I’m crying, then the next I’m mad about something like…you didn’t fold the towels right--which by the way, were folded right. I’m just--”

“Don’t say it!” I warn her, and she slouches. “Stop talking about my wife like that.”

“You’re not a mind reader and I need to realize that. I need to be more vocal with my wants and needs,” she says as I reach for her hand, “Especially during this time. I can’t get mad at you for not doing something when I didn’t even tell you in the first place. I really am sorry.”

I reach over and touch her chin, “I love you. I love all of your moods and emotions. I love seeing my sweet wife cry over a laundry soap commercial. I love this side of you.”

“It’s a freaking mess.” she says, laughing tearfully, “But thank you for loving me. It won’t last forever.”

“And even if it did, I would still love you anyway,” I cup her face and lean over to kiss her, “When I said I would love you forever, I meant that.”

She smiles as she rests her head back, “Forever is a really long time.”

“With you, it’s not long enough.”

I hold her gaze for a few moments before we both start to laugh. I absolutely meant it but I will admit it was a bit corny. She loved it though and she knows I meant it. I start the car and reach over to pat her thigh and she smiles at me, leaning over to kiss me.

“I kinda want some ice cream now.”

Looking over at her, I start to smile when I see the smirk on her face, “Tell me exactly what brand and flavor.”

#what am i gonna call this? #hmh snippet #sure idk lmaoooo #no bc i would probably cry if i wanted a certain ice cream too she's so real #anonymous #ask

[spirit-small]

From a young age, borrowers are encouraged to do as much for themselves as they can. They're social creatures by nature, and thrive in larger community settings, but their continued existence depends on not being detected. This means that small family groups and, often, solo individuals, are the norm. Not by nature, but by necessity. To that end, borrower children are taught the necessary skills for survival as early as they're able. It's not to get them out on their own quickly, but more because of how fragile and volatile a borrower's life can be. Orphans are remarkably common. They're taught to fend for themselves, because soon enough they may have to.

This is Phoenix Wright's first solo borrowing.

He is 9 years old.

The risk is low. Only two beans live here, and they're both rather preoccupied at the moment. All he has to do is get a couple of things. It'll be over before he knows it.

He silently makes his way across a countertop, and climbs into a cupboard. He knows where his target is. This borrowing stuff is easy, he didn't even SEE a bean.

Too bad he didn't hear one either.

The cupboard he's in is opened and light floods his eyes. He squints and finds himself face to face with the younger bean, caught red handed, quite literally, on account of the Cheeto dust. Flamin' Hot, naturally.

They stare at each other for a minute.

And another.

And another.

It almost seems like the bean is having trouble processing what he's seeing, as if he can't figure out what the appropriate response is.

"Um, hello. My name is Miles Edgeworth. What's yours?" He finally settles on.

"Uh.. Ph-Phoenix... Wright?"

The bean- the Miles- laughs. "I'm not sure, you tell me. Is it Phoenix or not?"

Phoenix is baffled. "Y-yes. That's right, Phoenix."

"Right." Miles nods.

"Yes."

"What?"

"That's right. I'm Wright."

"You're right? Then we're both right. Right?"

"I thought you were Edgeworth? Am I wrong?"

"No, you're right."

"That's right."

The two of them just look at each other for a moment, and simultaneously laugh. Laughing! With a bean! Phoenix is starting to suspect everything about his worldview might be a lie. Either that, or he found a rare One Of The Good Ones.

"So, um... May I ask what you're doing in my cupboard?" Miles asks. Phoenix has to think for a moment. What if he only gets mad when he realizes he's being borrowed from? Beans don't tend to take kindly to learning that.

But then again. What other explanation could there be?

"I... I was inspecting them. See, sometimes little bugs can get into these things, through even the tiniest of cracks in the wall. How would you feel if you started putting on the Ritz, only to find your crackers crawling with ants? I'm really doing you beans a service, here." Phoenix lies through his little teeth.

"...Ah... yes. Of... of course. That... makes sense. You know, if you're hungry, you can just help yourself. I don't mind. I'm sure you don't eat much. You can even take a little extra for later, if you want."

Phoenix bites into a Cheeto. He doesn't even hesitate.

"Mmmrf... Shank you... Mrrnff..."

Miles laughs, not necessarily at Phoenix's shameless display of his lack of table manners, but just... At the absurdity of the whole situation. Phoenix double checks the contents of his bag, and prepares to leave.

"W-wait! Are you... Leaving?" Miles looks at him like a sad, lost puppy.

"I have to. If I don't return soon, I'll never hear the end of it. I mean it, though... Thank you. For letting me take that stuff, and... For keeping me a secret."

"I don't recall promising to keep you a secret." Miles raises an eyebrow.

"Well, you did now." Phoenix winks. Miles gets a determined look on his face and nods.

"I understand..." He watches him as he disappears through a crack in the wall he'd never even put a second thought into. "Wait! Will I... Ever see you again...?"

Phoenix steps back out into the light for a moment. He looks down, thinking hard, considering all of the angles. Turning his thinking around- If beans are so dangerous, then the best way to survive a world full of them is to have one on your side, right? He looks up at Miles, and smiles.

"I think we can arrange that."

#ratattorney

[scolek]

i feel like sharing my opinions on flamin hot cheetos as well, which are as follows:

spice level decent, but disappointingly one note. there is no chee in this cheetos, only flamin hot. flamin hot cheetos is a man so destroyed by his quest for vengeance that he forgets who he was now that he has his revenge. he is so consumed with blood and sadness that he forgets how to love. he forgets to taste like cheese.

#i didnt get flamin hot though i just got regular #this opinion is long held #this is my character pitch for if dimension 20 ever goes back to calorum

[thegeminisage]

i wanna sleep sooo bad but i dont have time so instead im playing the legend of zelda tears of the kingdom flamin hot cheetos edition

yk whats wild is that like. while the water temple and low grav FUCKING ruled it did not feel like a proper dungeon. neither did the skyship. but THIS feels like a dungeon. even tho i know its only 5 objectives again lol

i really like how theres no boundary between this and the rest of the underworld, which i can see clearly from here. not like the divine beasts - there's no seams

it's also really fun for me & 3 sages to gang up on enemies lol i cant even imagine how crowded its gonna get with 4 (or more?!) of them

the music is such a good callback to oot as well - not any of the same tunes but def the same atmosphere

THE GONGS......this is truly chefs fingers. mwah

I CAN HEAR VAH RUDANIA IN THIS THEME......sick

OH THIS CART THING...i'm fighting the guy like from the trailer 😭

whoa they brought daruk's theme in as well...this is so muuuch it's so SAD. like he's dead!!!!!

holy shit my framerate lol

ohhh my god the way the music then died down when i got the last gong. AAAUGHGHGHG

man this boss must need a lot of arrows cuz its all ive been getting

GOHMA?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

HELLOOOOOOOO

oh my god they EVEN!!!!! did the eye on the ceiling!!!!!!!!!!!

i'm so happy to see this bitch again after 25 years. square tf up

SHE LITERALLY STARTED CRAWLING ON THE CEILING IM SO HAPPY...................

GOT HER ASS!!!! again :')

wait this genuinely brought tears to my eyes. he was all ohhhh idk if i can do it but i gotta try and man that gets me right Here

also, if im not mistaken, they used a similar musical cue to when daruk said "you better tell those other champions to eat their gravel if they wanna keep up with daruk" and MAAAAAN 😭

NO MORE MARBELED ROCK ROAST!!!!!!! thank fuck

ok im talking to some npcs and it says "gorons are born of the land" and these guys are "rock brothers" because they were born in the same place...so like what the mountain just spits them out?? really close to my "their dads carve them out of lava" theory actually

ok, i have to quit for now, but WHAT an amazing dungeon, truly!!!

#personal #loz blogging #totk lb #totk spoilers

[devils-little-sista]

God I’m really craving Taquitos so sad that we don’t have any. I could eat Taquitos all day everyday. Said the white girl who feels like I need to go to the hospital after I ate two spicy Cheetos the other day. (Taquitos and spicy Cheetos are two different kind of spicy ok. I can handle the Taquitos spicy. I cannot handle the flamin Cheeto spicy).

[degrassiclassiclover]

Degrassi Classic Characters as Bo Burnham Songs/Bits

by god have I been waiting for this one. I’m autistic and my my special interests are degrassi (duh) and bo so I’m beyond excited to be making this post

Joey- Oh Bo, High School Party, Improv, Left Brain Right Brain, I’m Bo Yo, Comedy, 1985

Wheels- Look Who’s Inside Again, Shit, All Time Low, Can’t Handle This, Eff

Snake- My Whole Family, Ironic, Theoretical Dick Jokes, Art is Dead, Sad, Poems, Unpaid Intern

Yick- I’m Bo Yo, Words Words Words, From God’s Perspective, Repeat Stuff, Flamin Hot Cheetos

Arthur- What’s Funny, Statistics, Nerds, Channel Five News, Lower Your Expectations, FaceTime With my Mom Tonight

Obviously I will add more and build on this post but this took forever so the very few people who understand this will have to wait a bit.

#degrassi #degrassi high #degrassi junior high #bo burnham

[chanstopher]

9 YEAR OLD DREAMY WAS IN LOVE WITH GRAYSON??? i actually almost choked on air reading that because when i was 8-10 i had a phat crush on robin/dick from young justice season 1; this is so funny skdjfhj i think there's been a variety of fandoms i've been in but the dc + marvel ones were the longest. i also loved littlest petshop, gen rex, ben 10 etc. but my iron man craze was literally the worst. can you believe that i had all 44 iron mans (the designs) memorized by name when i was 12? it's absolutely mindblowing thinking of that for me, i can barely remember my friends' names now djdjfkfj also hiii hope you are having a lovely day today ❣️ the flamin' hot cheeto look was a really fun one, if i'm being honest and yes! changbin looks so nice with light hair... my favourite binnie remains go-saeng era bin though, the ash blue/grey hair and slight mullet suited him a lot! i personally love natural hair on everyone but my preferred hair colour has always been a deep purple, like the one minho had a while back! whenever any of my biases get the grape hair is when i think they look the prettiest⏤my favourite gem is amethyst and that shade reminds me of the geode a lot, especially once it starts fading towards the pastels, it's like it's fading from the crystals to the chalcedony :D others i love are silver/lychee hair, blueberry hair, peach hair etc. hehe oh you're so cute :c i am more of a person whose love language is acts of service + gift giving so i often end up remembering the most absolutely trivial things concerning my friends, which has extended to my biases jfkjkgjd a few things i associate with them is: the stars (cliche but i once heard someone say to another person that their freckles were like specks of stardust & constellations in the night sky somewhere and that stuck with me for felix once i saw him after that!), guitars, berries, bandaids, skateboards, cooking/baking, cats, trace chain necklaces, sweaters, garlic (LOL) and little envelopes! soem of these are things i've seen them with and the others are like. this will sounds so weird but what i smell/taste/feel/picture when i think of them? it only happens with a few people though and the funniest thing is my ult isn't one of them KLDJDSJ but yeah jeongin is the one with which it does happen! what's your favourite food? and what is some fun activity you'd like to try out with chan if you had the chance to? - 🌨

hi my love! sorry im always so swamped during the weekends im like brain dead lmao

omg young justice was SO good the fact that it got cancelled was such a crushing part of my childhood, it was so perfect but just cause girls liked it they trashed it :( i fully support u memorizing all of iron mans suits, i always go into fandoms like that lmao if i really like something i was to be an encyclopedia of knowledge on it. i used to be that way about lord of the rings but a lot of that info has absolutely leaked out of my brain since i was a kid so now it just pops up randomly and im like how do i know this still???

purple is ALWAYS such a good color, its so sad to me that chris had purple hair for liek a week because its always SUCH a pretty color and i agree it was ESPECIALLY amazing on minho for maniac era, it really suited him! i do wish minho got to have more hairstyles, i feel like he either gets a coconut or coconut but you can see his forehead lol and i think he could pull off anything so i always wonder why they dont really do anything else most of the time.

omg i love remembering little insignificant facts about ppl, i always find that those are the things that make people feel so loved. the amount of times ive gotten something or mentioned something to my best friend that i know she likes it always surprises her cause she doesnt even remember telling me the fact, but im like its about you so it was important to me to remember. I also love gift giving for that reason, cause im not someone to do something super big or elaborate, but i'll get a couple tiny things that i know mean something to someone or that really remind me of them and it always feels nice, like im sharing a piece of how i see them with them.

my favorite food is easily tacos lol i love tacos so much that my best friend has a taco tattoo for me! and i like all kinds of tacos from the garbage taco bell ones to really good authentic street tacos, just something about them i find really comforting I don't know lol but yeah theyre definitely my favorite.

oh god this is massively cheesy but if i could literally do anything with chris it would to be to drive to the middle of nowhere and go stargazing. like just forget everything else and just tell each other stories about the constellations with nothing else around to bother us. i think that would be the most ideal thing to me.

#drm.ask #🌧 santa

[stayathomesurveys]

043.

Do you like McDonald’s sprite? I don’t order their Sprite.

What age did you start becoming more independent? 20. I moved out and across the country. 

How do you like your oatmeal? I don’t eat oatmeal. Oatmeal makes my throat hurt.

Do you ever just dance around the house? Sometimes.

List 5 things you need to do soon. Find a way to make money consistently, get my sleeping schedule on track, get into a consistent work out routine, clean my apartment, meal prep.

What do you do when you start to feel sad? Lie in bed and binge watch tv shows as I have been doing. I’m miserable. I felt so great the first few days after quitting my job and now I’m left alone to wallow in my depression and anxiety all day. I miss working but I don’t miss going to work. I want to work for myself and I don’t even know where to start. It’s not like I have a cushy life to fall back on. I can’t ask my parents for money to get by until I can figure out what to do with myself. My boyfriend makes good money but not enough for me to just not work. But going back to working a regular job sounds absolutely horrible. I just want to find myself again and have hobbies and get back into working out consistently so I can lose this stupid fucking weight I’ve put on and not hate myself so much anymore. I am so sad. Deeply sad and lonely.

Have you ever been to a metal concert? No.

Do you like metal? Sure.

What’s your favorite Christmas movie? I like all of the classic claymation ones the most.

What about Halloween movie? I love the classic ones! The Halloween franchise, for sure.

Do you like the taste of cilantro? No.

Have you ever busted a window accidentally? No.

Do you remember those Bratz dolls? What were your favorite dolls? Yeah. My favorite was Cloe.

What was the last thing to bum you out? Life.

What is your summer anthem? I don’t have one.

Do you enjoy apples? Yeah.

Have you ever made apple butter? Do you like it? No. I have had it, it’s good. My ex-boyfriend’s dad really liked apple butter and I remember we went somewhere and I think we stopped at Buc-ee’s and picked him up some.

Do you own any pocket knives? No.

On a scale of 1-10.. How happy are you and why? 0.

Do you think diamonds are overrated? No.

How many languages can you greet somebody in? I don’t know, a few?

Do you have a favorite planet? Pluto, I guess.

Do you know how to play the flute? I used to! I played it in middle school.

What do you enjoy putting in your smoothies? I don’t know. I like berries.

What’s a medication that has really helped you? Lol.

Do you forgive easily? Nope.

Have you ever broken up with somebody? No, even when I wanted to end things... I wasn’t able to and basically pushed him away until he dumped me.

What was the biggest phase you went through when you were younger? Probably like my wannabe emo/punk phase.

Is there something you’ve been hiding from someone? No.

Do you believe in demons? Yes.

Have you ever seen a spider consume another spider? No.

What’s your favorite fruit? Oranges.

Do you ever go clubbing? No.

Have you ever been to a church camp? No.

Have you ever accidentally swallowed something you shouldn’t have? No.

Last book you remember enjoying? Hmmm... I’m not sure.

When was the last time you got scared? I don’t know.

Have you ever seen a boy band live? Yeah, the Jonas Brothers.

Have you ever been dehydrated? Yeah.

Have you ever shot a gun? Yes.

Do you use Facebook? Yeah, mostly for browsing and using the local buy nothing group.

Would you say you’re well educated on religious topics? To a degree.

What’s the longest you have walked at once? I’m not sure. I walked a TON in DC back in March.

Do you ever take those Buzzfeed quizzes? I used to do a lot of those.

How long was your last phone call? 41 minutes.

Are there a box of tissues on your bedside table? No.

Have you cut your hair here recently? Yeah.

Do you like skittles? Yes.

What is your favorite kind of cheeto? (spicy, regular, puffs.. etc. Puffs and flamin hot.

Do you have a skin care routine? Yes.

Do you know how to write in cursive? Not much anymore. I don’t remember the entire alphabet really well. My cursive never got “pretty” because they stopped teaching it 3rd grade. I grew up being told that by 4th and 5th grade, everything we did in school would have to be done in cursive... but by the time I got there, they ditched that. My cursive is horrible. I really want to start practicing, though.

What’s the closest thing to you that is pink? Part of a stuffed animal.

Have you ever watched a black and white film? Yes.

Did you used to read Dr. Seuss books as a kid? Yes.

What’s the longest you’ve had to wait in line for something? Hours.

What’s the sickest you’ve ever been? Hmmmm.

If you had to be named after an inanimate object, what would you choose? I don’t know.

What is one food you would not like to give up? Pasta.

Would you ever donate a kidney to a stranger if applicable? Yeah.

How many scars do you have? A few.

Do you have any unusual things wrong with your body? (I have different length arms and hands for example) I don’t know.

What did you last have to eat? Pasta.

When was the last time you visited a carnival? 2019.

Do you own a pair of those socks with toes? No.

What age did you stop trick or treating? that is if you celebrate Halloween at all.. 8.

What’s the best flavor of popsicle? Cherry.

Are you caught up on laundry? Kind of.

Does your car tend to get super messy like mine? 😅 Yeah, my boyfriend is a slob. It’s so embarrassing to get in and out of the car with people around. 

What search engine do you use? Google and bing.

#survey

[lousydrawingsforgoodpeople]

emo cheetos…came to me in a dream

#weird shit #flamin sad cheetos #snacks #doodles #bad art #lousy drawings #doodle #cheetos #emo

[theweepingmonk]

My brother: you've met Amber before right?

Me, who rarely looks at people's faces: uhhh I think so

Amber: there's so many of us she probably can't keep up

My brother: 👁️👄👁️

#ascdhahahs my brother literally just stood in the doorway stunned for like 30 seconds and she had to come back and get him xD #jay's life #anyways I ate all my xxtra hot flamin hot cheetos and im sad :/ #now all i have is a chocolate bar

[oldcurse]

i want to be off twitter and instagram by the end of this year

#my new years resolution was to work towards being off twitter/instagram by 2021 #i think now that im feeling it even more #im gonna start by deleting twitter and instagram from my phone over the weekends #so after work friday to like 5 pm on sunday #i think thats a good start #original post #im literally so sad i saw this video three times on my twitter timeline #of someone feeding their cat a flamin hot cheeto #and its literal animal cruelty bc the cat's crying while it continues to lick the cheeto #THE CAT DOESNT HAVE TASTE BUDS LIKE US TO TELL THEM THAT THEY CANT TOLERATE SPICY FOOD #their stomach reacts horribly to it and causes unimaginable pain which is why the cat is crying #but continues to lick bc it doesnt know what the fuck is causing it so much pain #and people on my tl keep retweeting that shit without knowing anything #i just absolutely hate twitter it makes me so miserable

[baratallew]

I pulled this Cheeto out of the bag and almost didn’t eat it because I felt so bad for it.

#cheetos #flamin hot cheetos #sad #funny #meme #memes #hilarious #why does this Cheeto look so sad

[hanyusan]

two asian men duke it out on ice while callous onlookers sit by and rate their fighting moves

For years, I have been reluctant to comment on the whole Yuzuru vs. Nathan media subject. I possess a weak (figurative) heart and an anxious disposition, so it follows that I dislike conflict.

Then I realized that this is possibly the last time we will see the two compete on the same ice. And that makes me a bit sad.

I’ve concluded that over the years, what’s been most irksome about all the “YUZURU VS. NATHAN SHOWDOWN TO THE DEATH” headlines is that they’re some of the laziest writing I have ever borne witness to. For years, we’ve been reading the same thing. I’d venture a guess that they brainstormed all of these headlines back in 2015 and have been pulling from that hat for the last several years.

These journalists are still out here trying to convince everyone that there’s an intense rivalry going down between two chill dudes, one of whom is in a perpetual state of needing a bangs trim and the other whose peak fashion aesthetic is slapping Flamin’ Hot Cheetos on his Under Armour; and both of whom are in some kind of unspoken competition to out-compliment the other. Understandably, these two are not the easiest subject material to work with when it comes to crafting maximum drama. But how can the best topic someone thinks of be some “dethroning” fluff? How perfectly tame. Clickbait has evolved far beyond the media’s capabilities, and they’re not even trying to keep up anymore.

If they’re going to twist the narrative to that degree, then they should really commit. Go big or go home; or whatever it is the kids say nowadays. So for this fated free skate, I want to see creativity. I want to actually feel something read the news. I want to see headlines like, “Successful two-time gold digger and Ivy League dinosaur tamer assault one another with spinning foot knife martial arts.” Now, that is a headline that would incite me to click. Also would make an impressive article thumbnail, if I do say so myself.

All jokes aside (is it a joke though): everything about and surrounding this sport is a dumpster fire except for the athletes themselves. It saddens me that every single event becomes a issue of Yuzuru vs. Nathan when the root problem lies in the system and the media that capitalizes on it.

I’m not going to lie, when Nathan first started getting tied into the whole mess years ago, I fell victim to it. His skating was not my cup of tea, and I grew frustrated with his scores in comparison to Yuzuru’s. I had to consciously remind myself over and over that they are the performers; they are responsible for nothing aside from what they do on the ice. I stayed out of as much discourse as possible because I don’t like confrontation, and also because I knew that my anger would lead me to say something that I would regret.

Some amount of aging has left me in quite the state of apathy, where I am content watching pretty people defy gravity and less bothered about what happens outside of that. Not completely; I think that’s impossible, but it’s nice to be able to read an incendiary headline and find it absolutely hilarious. I laughed so hard reading the preview text for that article about “prince vs. king” or whatever that I'm pretty sure I have a six-pack now.

I’m not trying to say that everyone should stop getting angry over things that demand it. But especially on the internet, there is a fine line between anger and toxicity. Let’s not allow ourselves to be poisoned. Keep a clear mind. Have some cookies. Skating is first and foremost something that brings its athletes joy. Watching them should bring you joy, too.

I hope that, in spite of everything, every skater—including those who apparently exist aside from Yuzuru Hanyu and Nathan Chen? Wow, who knew—will give performances come Thursday that they themselves will be proud of. Scores and records are good. Heartfelt performances are better. Personal satisfaction is best.

#yuzuru hanyu #nathan chen #beijing 2022 #scribbles #i swear that usually these posts start off serious #then i just lose it halfway #or maybe i'd lost it to begin with; a very real possibility

[helloitsojo]

he’s sad cuz he dropped his last bag of flamin hot cheetos in the sewer :(

#spamton :) #spamton #spamton g spamton #deltarune #deltarune spamton #valart

[kcatta-wodahs]

MC Who Does Not Fear Death x OM! Demon Brothers

Or maiming, or apparently any other consequences. You’ve walked into this situation with absolutely no filter and no fear. Time to tear down every structure of Devildom society.

Lucifer

You look at him with a withering stare when he tries to intimidate you into behaving.

“I was summoned out of my trashy apartment to this place, where literally anyone could snap me like a twig on accident. I’m just working on the assumption that I’m already dead.”

He sternly looks at you. “You’re under my protection during your time here. No harm will come to you.”

You snort derisively, which visibly irritates him. “Don’t worry about it. I won’t come back to haunt you if it happens.”

As you continue through your life in Devildom he keeps calling you out for meddling and all that, like usual, and he HATES that you literally *do not care* when he threatens you.

Like HE knows that he wouldn’t hurt Diavolo’s transfer student but YOU are supposed to be AFRAID of him dammit.

His frustration at this ends up turning into a form of respect. You’re about the only person who will stand up to him, and tbh like you’re so fucking fragile but you’ll yell at him all day? That takes guts. Annoying guts. But you’ve got guts.

But also STOP IT. He has enough stress in his life and now he’s constantly terrified that you’ve decided it’s a great idea to adopt a baby balrog

Which you did once. He’s just afraid that “Flamin Hot Cheeto” is going to come back since you somehow managed to imprint on it.

despite the fact that the BABY could easily tear your arms off on accident

Not to mention he gets the flack for EVERY SINGLE ONE of these following stories. You stress him out so much. Please. Please, stop. 

He’s almost to the point of begging. The Avatar of Pride is three steps away from either locking you away for the rest of the year or begging on his knees for you to calm down. 

 But you know you’d find a way out if he locked you up so no worries. It’ll be a good challenge.

Mammon

“Well you WON’T be dead because it’s my job to protect you! Are you doubting the Great Mammon?!”

Stupid human. Yeah, you’re fragile and weak, but that’s why HE’S your bodyguard now, and there’s no way in hell (lol) that he would let you die on his watch.

Lucifer would kill him.

You welcome the challenge, and he thinks it’s funny at first but quickly becomes a flustered mother hen.

“NO, we are NOT going out to Madam Scream’s at 3am! Do ya know what kinda CREEPS are out there at 3am?!”

And you sneak out the fucking window.

He has had more heart attacks in the past week than he has had in the last 100 years of life.

He starts agreeing to your ridiculous adventures JUST because then he can actually keep an eye on you. 

He adores the chaos of the laugh that bursts from you every time you narrowly escape death. 

He HATES how often you have to NARROWLY ESCAPE DEATH. So he will never tell you.

He almost doesn’t have time for his own shenanigans anymore, because all his time is taken up by trying to make sure you stay alive.

And you’ve figured out that if you turn *any* of your ideas into a money-making one, he will join you whole-heartedly.

So you bribe him because what’s money to you anymore anyway?

Leviathan

I mean he doesn’t leave his room much, so tbh he probably just gets texts from you that make him want to scream.

‘hey uh levi say if someone were to hypothetically be stuck in a succubus’ devil basement to become an unwilling sacrifice to asmo what would that person, hypothetically, do?’

‘probably die’ is usually all he sends back

You always come back, because he always sends a text to the other brothers. In that case Asmo came to rescue you himself and scold the succubus.

You become the friend that he makes funny throwing-shade reddit posts about. (Devvit? Devil reddit? Eh??)

‘Levi so this has nothing to do with anything but is there a cure for a dangerously potent ‘always win at rock-paper-scissors' curse? Asking for a friend’

‘Friend is being held hostage tho so maybe be quick about a response’

He didn’t even know that kind of curse existed. None of them did. What the fuck did you do.

How did you get taken captive by playing rock paper scissors?

He doesn’t know. Nobody does. He expects the play-by-play so he can recommend it as a new anime to his favorite producers. 

Somehow your chaotic plans end up with stories almost as great as TSL. 

Beelzebub

He physically carries you around.

He’s like “fuck this you can’t get into trouble if I’m holding you.”

If Beel’s on MC watching duty, he’s almost the only one who is successful, just because you physically cannot get away. 

But at the same time, he is very easily bribed. 

So yes, he’ll go to Madam Scream’s with you at 3am. Sounds like fun.

But he is very protective after losing someone he cares about (who you remind him of so much….) so he keeps you close when you’re out and about too.

If you start getting into a fight with some other demon he literally just takes the fight for you and wins with no trouble at all.

You like having Beel with you.

Especially finding street festivals! You’re in a whole new world and there’s a MILLION things to try. Beel is more than happy to try them with you.

But that leads to arguments about whether deadly creatures to humans are still deadly when dead. 

“No, you can’t eat that it’s on fire. I know even small fires hurt humans. I’ll eat it for you.”

“That hot sauce makes every demon I know cry. You really shouldn’t buy a bottle. Please. No, don’t try it. No, that’s too much for one-- oh. Oh no.”

He forgives you as long as you don’t actually get hurt and you give him your leftovers.

Asmodeus

“If I get wrinkles because of you I promise you will never hear the end of it. I will curse you forever.”

He swears on every single one of his lovers that you have started giving him grey hairs.

GREY HAIRS, MC.

Why can’t you just settle down and let them all take care of you? You don’t have to prove anything to the other demons!

But you will. You’re living in Devildom now, and by everything unholy, you are going to live that life to its fullest extent.

He was thrilled at first when you were all for joining him at his nightclubs and parties. Now he hides every party’s date from you.

That time you almost threw yourself off a balcony to try and emulate a very drunk demon’s newest dance move.

“I need to stay TRENDY, Asmo!! I’ll be fine!!”

Ever since learning Demonus doesn’t affect humans you have challenged every single stuck-up tough boy to a drinking contest.

And every single time you win, Asmo has had to *narrowly* save you from being killed by said demon.

And you just say “he deserved it” every time.

And like, yeah okay, he probably did but YOU’RE NOT ALLOWED TO DIE.

Somehow, you manage to out-party Asmo.

dON’T TELL THE OTHERS but he lives for the times when you practically fall asleep on his shoulder while coming home from a rager. You may not get drunk, but when you’re sleepy, you’re so affectionate and something in his heart melts.

Satan

At first, Satan was all for the rebellious “life life with no restraints” thought process you explained to him.

I mean, he didn’t like the assumption that he and his brothers couldn’t control themselves to not accidentally kill you, but also… fair.

But he didn’t realize that this mindset followed through for EVERY demon in ANY place.

Including RAD, where old and wizened demons were *really* not used to being contradicted

Which led to you “accidentally insulting” your 5000 year old Human Studies professor by giving them a pop quiz on current memes (which they failed).

And left Satan as the one who had to make sure that said professor didn’t kill you. 

And the thing is, this keeps happening.

You’ve written all over the school’s library books, pointing out every error.

You *continue* to argue with the demons who threaten to kill you when you say silly things like “No, Solomon did not learn his sorcery at Hogwarts because Hogwarts isn’t REAL.”

(Solomon, meanwhile, refutes you vehemently and seems to grow three inches taller every time you glare at him.)

Satan assures you that he values knowledge and truth and all that, but could you maybe find a less dangerous way to push it?

No can do, Satan, because you already had plans with Mammon to use a curse that writes the history of the actual Sorceric Academy that Solomon attended like 400 years all over the desks in Human Studies. It’s activated by anyone saying “Hogwarts”. 

No, no, Satan, it’s brilliant, because you can’t do magic. It can’t be you who did it.

Satan, no don’t tell Lucifer.

I thought you hated him. Satan, wait. 

You are the only person in the history of ever who convinces him to come to Lucifer for intervention. You wear that badge with pride and also deep, deep, bitter sadness. 

Belphegor

Like, through the plot your willingness to be a thorn in anyone’s side just to get more information really works for Belphie.

He’s like all I gotta do is ask? Sweet. Yeah. Go, human.

But then when he’s all big and threatening and “im gonna kill you” and you just kind of look at him and nod like “yeah, this checks out.” 

Frankly, that’s rude, MC. 

And then he keeps threatening to kill you and it doesn’t even PHASE you like. You just keep listening to him rant and going “OH i think i get it now”

He liked that you were always looking for more information when he was the one pushing you around, but now?

No. Human, he is going to KILL you here, STOP ASKING QUESTIONS.

And then you do the time-travel bit, and see that he *literally has killed you in one timeline* and you just like

Shrug it off and keep talking about Lilith???????

Tbh what probably stopped him from doing it again is just that you’re fucking insane, MC 

“MC, you literally just saw yourself dead in Mammon’s arms”

You wave your hand vaguely in his direction and say, “Yeah okay, but can we talk about the lack of communication in this household because it is tearing this family apart.”

What the fuck MC

When he’s back to normal, tbh he loves that side of you. He loves getting into shit when he’s not sleeping. He will 100% encourage you and be there to make sure that you *don’t* actually die again.

He’s the only one who doesn’t actually try to stop you. Who knew he was so into chaos.

But if you try to drag him to a plan when he should be sleeping he will be like Beel and literally just hold you down while he naps dammit. You brought this on yourself. He needs sleep.

#obey me #obey me! #obey me shitposts #obey me crack #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me leviathan #obey me beelzebub #obey me asmodeus #obey me satan #obey me belphegor #bast babbles #my writing #obey me headcanons #gender neutral mc #re-reading this makes me vibrate with the need to destroy things #tldr is that humans are fucked up