#for 'in case I ever get unemployed' but when I did get temporarily unemployed did they help

[laneynoir]

Okay so, I had this idea for the “defending a lover” thing (again). What if you put “Don’t ever say anything like that ever again” and “yes, I’m being serious! That was way out of line.” Together but for Legolas. Idk I just thought that would be interesting and you’ve been wanting requests soo👍🤭

I apologize for how long this took me, and it turned out to be a two part thing so~

Change.  It's a funny word, that can mean so many things. So much, such as life and death, and so little, such as a rock from one day to the next.

Recently there have been far to many 'much' changes in your life.

Not that you were in horrified shock (anymore), or lamenting your loss (often), but things like up and cause more than your idea of a fair amount of stress.

The first major change was probably the butterfly, such a pretty, small, and seemingly inocint thing. You'd seen it in the park, while taking a walk -as one might do if they are poor and have just lost their job- when it fluttered to a landing on the path in front of you.

That in itself would not have been a strange thing, the fact that it seemed to glow, and had an odd green color however was.

Intrigued, you had crouched to get a better look, but it lifted off the ground and flew to a spot six feet away. Resolving to at least get a picture of the bug, you stalked quietly after it.

Having lost track of time, you'd followed the neon wonderment (which you begrudgingly had named Dill, for it's coloring was close to that of the plant) far off of the path, and into the woods.

Upon realising this, you mearly shrugged and started humming the song. The benefits of being temporarily unemployed.

At last Dill landed on the exposed root of a great tree, and promptly turned grey; or more accurately, to stone.

You found yourself gaping at the audacious creature, thirty minutes it had led you on... only to turn to stone.

You'd only taken a step forward when, in a moment that clearly showed the authors love for Alice in Wonderland , the ground opened up beneath your feet.

Suddenly you were free falling with nothing to catch yourself, and as opposed to Alice there was no conveniently placed floating table an accompanying lamp to shed light into the passage.

Not that you would have been able to turn a lamp on, as you speed was constantly picking up and any root you tried to grab only tore at your hands, painfully pulling a fingernail free.

When the novelty of falling with no way to stop faded, (how deep was this hole?) Your rational thoughts -those you had anyway- returned. You decided quickly to stop trying to slow your decent, as that was getting you nowhere, the realisation that this fall is going to end in your death quickly followed.

Oh.

Well that wasn't exactly how youd hoped the day would go, but it wasn't as if you needed to show up for work the next day, and really, a missing persons case was probably the most anyone would pay mind to you. With that thought you let a laugh escape, a sound that is decidedly strange in the few seconds before the sound is sucked away.

Just as the comparison with the scene where Loki complains about having been falling for thirty minutes crossed your mind, the world, or at least gravity, seemed to tilt and the bile you'd been successfully containing made a dangerously close attempt at an appearance.

The lights (wait- lights?) swirled around in a galaxy of colours before the rocky ground (wait no- that couldn't be right. You we're already underground.) Came into view.

And there came the second change, though you did not know it at the time. A delightful change in universe.

Staring at the rocks which were growing steadily closer to your person, you notice a man with red hair, and prehaps a note book, really he was still to far away to tell. And of course you were about to die.

You do at last come close enough to tell that, yes it is a notebook, and feel an odd sense of pride at the correct guess.

The ground is very close when the man looked up, mouth promptly falling open, and you only had the feverant hope that you dont land on the man, as his sweater is quite nice, and you don't wish to ruin it.

When you woke you found the same man, as well as three others peering over you. Thus followed a round of introductions, Dori, Nori, Ori, (the man from before) and an unrelated man named Oin.

When you were convinced that, no, you were not dead, you politly inquired as to what happned to your clothing. You were not pleased to learn that you'd not been whearing any upon landing, only what Ori described as 'a blanket of stars, swathing your form until landing' (the guy must be a poet, you decided)

The following monthes were quite... Odd to say the least. It took two weeks before you were convinced that this wasn't really a cult, even longer until you belived the whole 'dwarf' thing.

Another change, a change of mind came in your time in the Erud Luin you were... Content. The air seemed to be so pure that breathing itself was a privilege, and even though you were a bit out of place among the bearded lot -because you had never seen a woman with facial hair, much less a this many, all whom pulled it off with enviable grace- you settled in with the suspicious folk with relative ease.

Though the time you mentioned needing a haircut nearly sent your new housemates into cardiac arrest.

You rarely missed your old life, and certainly didn't miss the clothing with lack of pockets, which seemed to be almost as importamt to Dwarrow as their weapons. And that's saying somthing.

You made many an aquantince there, eventually (albeit accidentally) earning the respect of a gruff captain, and subsequently earning lessons in combat.

That led to meeting the two young princes, after which you watched your back alot more. They were sweet, but pranksters through and through.

Meeting their uncle and mother was a nerve-wracking experiance to say the least. But lady Dís was an amazing woman, and her brother no less so.

Not one to take charity without repayment, you began helping around the 'Ri household as much as you could, Dori owned a laundry-sewing-alterations service, and you became accustomed to such work quickly.

Ori was at the end of his Scribe training, and was truly a magnificent artist. And so once a month he usually was employed for a portrait painting.

Nori... Had sticky fingers. You enjoyed your lessons with Dwalin (nearly as much as Ori enjoyed accompanying you, though you had the distinct feeling that you were being ised as an excuse to watch the tattooed dwarf) and so did not help the middle brother in his activity.

...much

A pleasant change was when the 'Ri family officially took you into their household and named you kin before the law. An impressive feat as Nori managed not to pickpocket the nobles presant.

Ori in particular became close to you, so really it came as no surprise when you backed him in his wish to join the Quest for Erabor.

A dragon, after all, would be neat.

Sitting at the table of Master Baggins, (who was even shorter than the dwarves, and had the softest looking curls youd ever seen) you lamented the horrible display of manners that Thorin in particular displayed.

The next day you gleefully handed your money over to Balin, the hobbit would join the Quest.

Thus the journy began.

And here you are, tied in a bag.

Trolls really smell awful. And you don't exactly enjoy being dubbed as the one who'd given the parasites to the dwarves.

Still the distraction worked and the trolls turn to stone, leaving you thinking once again about the butterfly who'd started this all.

The languages of Arda came to you easily, so you know kudzul -unofficially of course, as it is forbidden to teach. Ori was quite creative in 'accidently' translating it for you- and now Bilbo makes quite the teacher in Sindrin.

Lessons that the young scibe was defenently not listening in on.

And so you can laugh quietly as the elven lord invites you for dinner, arousing the suspicion of the dwarves.

As lovely as Rivendale is, you cannot but feel relief when you leave. Everythings seems to be higher in volume after the stay, the buzzing of the giant bees when you arive at Beorn's house is louder than it should be. Somehow your stay with Elrond has changed you.

Mirkwood is awful. Everything is amplified and muted at the same time, voices are garbled to your ears, yet hurt in their volume simultaneously. Every glint of light off of a weapon is blinding, but the darkness offers no comfort.

You smell the spiders and hear them before you can even realise what they are. Only instinct and habbit from Dwalin's lessons keep you alive.

You will never tell your adopted family, but you find significant relief when the elves take you captive, hoping for a dark space at last to curl into a ball, and maybe pass out.

The blond is admittedly attractive, but looses brownie points with you when he takes Thorin's sword.

~

The Elven King Thranduil has just as commanding a presence as Thorin, and hair to envy. He seems to be alike his son in that he also looses any brownie points by subjecting your lot to rot in his dungeons. Very rude. You wouldnt even live to a hundred.

The elven cooks are quite good however, if the food they feed the prisoners is anything to go by. And yet you cannot eat more than a few bites. Your body hyperaware of everything, senses dialed up so that you cannot tune anything out each crumb of bread is your worst enemy, the stench of unwashed dwarves, even though they are around the corner from your cell, washes over you.

The steps of Bilbo when he comes seem to be as heavy as a trolls for all that they sound.

The quiet presance of Legolas -the blond- is the only solace when he takes gaurd, Tauriel hangs by Kili's cell more often than not, her voice is like music, and they speak quietly. But still you catch every words and hear as their tones to one another change.

Also do you hear with some satisfaction that Dwalin and Ori have been locked up together. Prehaps now they will finaly face eachother.

~

A month you've yet been in the woodland realm's cells, and you grow worse. The shouting from your companions is like a hammer driving a spike into your head with each syllable. Your ears have begun to ache. Legolas has spoken to you only, and though it pains you, you enjoy the quiet company.

You tell him nothing of the Quest, but when he asks where you come from, you cannot help but answer the prince. He listens, enraptured by your tale. When the very sound of your own breathing is to much to bare, Legolas notices, and brings Oin to your cell.

You nearly vomit when he arrives, and his shouting causes you to shake, eyes wide, he leaves.

You can feel everything. The texture of your cloth is awful. The ground is rough.  The bread is two days old, and baked by a novice. The water was kept in an old wine barrel. You can see to well. It hurts.

Legolas snaps at the dwarves as their talking is making you curl into yourself, shivering.

You feel useless. But you can't make it stop.

Your ears are the worst, you want to huddle in a ball and press your palms against them. And plug them with wax. But the feeling is to much, they're too sensitive. You've torn a strip from the horrid tunic to tie your hair back from touching them.

When Bilbo comes to say that a way out has been found, you just look into his eyes and he knows. You wont be joining them.

He releases the dwarves, and when they notice your lack of appearance they rush to your cell.

The clambering for an explanation is horrid. A whimper escapes your mouth, and Bilbo hushes them, backed up by Thorin, they fall as silent as is possable.

"Y/n, whats wrong?" Ori is the quietest dwarf in voice, but still is loud to your ear.

You shake your aching head. "I don't know. I don't-" you break off and are horrified to find a tear rolling down your face. "I'm so sorry. I'm useless-"

They raise their voices in protest and you wince, entire body jerking. "Like this." You finish. "I cant even stand the sound of my own breathing, or the feel of clothing. I havent eaten in who knows how long. And I'm about as strong as a toothpick!"

At the confused looks you sigh. "A tiny shaving of wood used to poke food from between teeth. Look, the point is, I cant do much of anything right now. Hate me if you must, but I cannot accompany you on this quest anymore. I wish you all the best of luck, but you must go."

"How can you think that we would hate you." To your shock it is Thorin who speaks. "You were taken from your home, just as we were. You lost everything, but yet you started over in our land, and were courageous enough to join a mad quest to face a dragon. You have proved yourself more than necessary, saving the lives of me and mine. If we must leave you now, be assured that when we may, we will return for you. You will always be welcomed in any realm of dwarves, you are kin."

You smile in gratitude at his acceptance and promise, but make a shooing motion with you hand. "I hear them taking their meal, you must hurry. Go!"

With nods, they depart. Each step echoing painfully loud in your ears. When they are out of sight you crumple, not knowing if you will ever lay eyes on them again.

The green tunic you've come to recognize as comfort comes into view. "That was admirable of you."

You smile softly. "Not truly, rather self serving actually. I love them all dearly, but they are the loudest bunch." You meet Legolas' eyes. "Are you going to stop them?"

He ignores your question and drops to his knees, reaching through the bars. "You are crying..." There is sorrow apparent on his features, and it sends a feeling of guilt through you.

"Sorry"

"Do not be sorry, you are unwell. That is why I have come, father has given me permission to bring you to the healers, should you be willing." His tome indicates that he really would like it if you took up this offer, so you nod.

He unlocks the door and you move to stand. "Will they be able to-" black specks float around the edges of your vision and try as you might, blinking does not clear them away.

"Ah, shit"

Yaaaayyyyyyy.

#my fic #legolas x reader #legolas x you #mentioned relationships: #barduil #dwalin x Ori #Bilbo Baggins x Thorinn Oakinshield #Bagginshield #Kili x Tauriel #i'll get part two up #this is awful im so sorry

[rjhpandapaws]

How a Family is Built

Chapter 1: It Starts with a Couple of Good Friends

Connor took some time on his own after the revolution. It had seemed like the most fitting thing to do. Very few androids trusted him, though he couldn’t blame them, so he didn’t believe he would be that welcome at Jericho. The hug he and Hank had shared had been nice but there was a defined line between coworkers and housemates that Connor didn’t feel that he would be permitted to cross. Not to mention being temporarily unemployed meant that he wouldn’t be able to contribute to the household which would have been unfair to Hank. He was CyberLife’s crowing achievement, he could figure something out. As it turned out, there weren’t too many places that were willing to hire you when the only thing you had done was hunt your own kind, and failed at that too. Sure, he was one of the faces of the Revolution, but that seemed to hurt more than it helped him. Some places seemed to believe that he was applying for jobs to make a point instead of the fact that he actually needed one and turned him away. He considered a dog walking service but only briefly because as much as he liked dogs they didn’t always seem to like him. He assumed it was because he didn’t smell like anything organic and that meant danger in most cases.

So he wandered instead and picked up odd jobs when and wherever he could. He was intentionally vague about his whereabouts and what he was doing whenever Markus or Hank reached out to him. He was aware he was probably causing them more worry than relief, but he wasn’t ready to admit that his venture into the real world had been a failure. That despite all that he had been built to be he had failed. He wasn’t sure how much of that fear was his own and how much of it was from what failure had meant for him before the Revolution. He was still trying to parse Connor from RK800. He was aware that there was only so much separation that could be done, but he still wanted to know the difference between his deviancy and his base code. Hank and Markus would both say that it wasn’t important, but they also hadn’t had an angry AI rip everything out from under them. She had been quiet since CyberLife had been returned to Elijah, but he wanted to know what his natural state of being was just in case she ever returned. He wanted to know what normal was in the event he would have to fight his way back again. Hank would have called him paranoid, but he felt he had a right to be after everything that had happened to him. Reality was a luxury in his situation and he wanted to keep his grip on it as best he could. If that meant wandering aimlessly through Detroit then that was what he would do.

The thing about friends is that when they only hear from you on occasion and don’t see you for nearly a year apparently they get worried. Connor couldn’t explain what had happened to him between when he saw Markus at a cafe and when he woke up in Hank’s living room. Before this crash he hadn’t gone into proper stasis in months. He got a few minutes here or there, but never enough to sort out the ever growing pile of errors in his code. “He finally back with us?” Came Hank’s voice from somewhere in the house. “Yeah. He’s back online, he just needs a few moments to recalibrate.” That was Markus’s voice, and from far closer than Connor would have liked. He was only made aware of the interface that had kept Markus so close to him because of the notification he received when it was terminated. He let his systems finish calibrating before he opened his eyes. He felt notably less sluggish now and the dread of the feeling that he had been slipping away from himself was nearly gone. He sat up carefully and took in his surroundings. He was in Hank’s house and it was much more clean that it had been on his last visit. “Welcome back to the land of the living Kid.” Hank remarked as he walked into the living room with a bottle of thirium in one hand and a light beer in the other. Some habits refused to die he supposed.

“Thank you.” He said as he took the offered thirium bottle, “Sorry for taking up your couch.” Hank rolled his eyes as he sat in the open space on the couch, “You can make it up to me by being honest about where you’ve been the past few months and why you haven’t been sleeping.” “Androids don’t-” Connor started. “It’s a turn of phrase Connor.” Hank cut him off, “Now out with it.” “Take your time.” Markus said in a way that would have been reassuring if Connor hadn’t been so on edge, “I’m here if you would rather interface.” He watched Markus pack up the laptop and various tablets he had likely been using to monitor him while he had been in stasis. Did he dare tell them the truth and admit to being a failure? It didn’t come with the same consequences as before but something about it still didn’t feel right. He didn’t want to face their disappointment. He was pulled out of his thoughts by Hank putting a hand on his knee. “Nothing short of having gone back to tracking down Deviants is going to upset us Con, I promise.” Hank said and gave his leg a reassuring squeeze, “But you haven’t slept in close to six months and between that and never hearing from you, we’re worried. We just want to make sure you’re alright.”

“You’ve been checking for your Amanda program again.” Markus pressed, his tone was less frantic than Hank’s but the worry was still there, “We made sure that she was gone. Your Mind Palace is your own now.” “Is that what’s bothering you Connor?” Hank asked. “Part of it.” He admitted as he blinked away the stress warning that popped up on his HUD, “I want to be sure what I’m feeling is mine and not just my code. That it won’t be taken away again as soon as I make a mistake.” He hadn’t meant to let all of that out, but once he had started he couldn’t stop the words from spilling out short of shutting off his vocal processor. Hank looked surprised and Markus looked worried. “Connor, we wouldn’t let something like that happen to you.” Markus said as he reached out for Connor. His synthskin hadn’t fallen away but Connor knew he was offering to interface, to be a median if that would be easier. “You trust us don’t you?” “Of course I do.” He agreed, “Its myself and my systems that I don’t trust. How do I know that I’m actually Deviant? How can we be sure this isn’t just another last ditch effort by CyberLife to undo everything? How do I know that any of this is real?” “Alright, fuck this.” Hank sighed as he stood, “Time to get the dog. He’ll know if its you or not. You’re his goddamn favorite after all.”

Connor found himself looking around the room as he finally noticed the absence of a certain four legged beast. He set the empty thirium bottle on the coffee table and leaned back against the couch. That was all the time he had to brace himself. He heard an excited boof and the scramble of paws on the hardwood floor. “Go find him, go find Connor.” Hank encouraged. Connor found himself buried under an excited Saint Bernard only a few moments later. He felt himself smile genuinely for the first time in months. He buried his face and hands in the dog’s fur and felt a rush of relief. Sumo had recognized him, which meant at the very least that today was real. Had he been able to he would have cried. “The big lug missed you just like the rest of us.” Hank said from behind him, “I had to pull him away from the door the first couple of weeks you were gone. He thought that every little sound on the other side was you.” “I’m sorry.” He said from his place buried in Sumo’s side. “Just keep in touch this time Kid.” He said as he laid a hand on Connor’s shoulder, “Or tell us where you’ve been staying so we can come and visit you instead.” Connor hesitated for a long moment caught between lying; which would lower Hank’s concern; or telling the truth and making him upset. He settled for the truth, “I haven’t really been staying anywhere in particular.”

He was met with a long stretch of silence before Markus decided to speak up, “Do you mean that you have been homeless or something else?” The concern in his voice made Connor flinch. “I don’t have a place to stay.” He confessed, “If I was working I would stay there if I was able to.” He heard Hank sigh from behind him, “Connor you could have come back here if you needed to.” “I didn’t want to disappoint you because I couldn’t do this on my own.” Connor said. He sat up but continued to pet Sumo who had finally calmed down, “I’m designed to be able to adapt and I couldn’t even get a job.” “Stop that Connor.” Hank said firmly, “I wouldn’t have been disappointed. I know it seems like it, but I’m not mad, I’m just worried.” He walked around to the front of the couch so he could look Connor in the eye, “Finding a job is hard, it always has been, but the odds are stacked against you because of what you’re known for. I know its not what you want to do, but I can talk to Jeff about you coming back to the station.” “There is always a place for you at Jericho as well if you would rather that.” Markus took a moment when he noticed Connor’s hesitation, “You can stay with me if that works better. We could always use a liaison with the police, I know it isn’t ideal, but we can give you that much until you can find something else that interests you.”

“There aren’t many androids that are willing to trust me. Are you sure it would be okay?” Connor pressed, “Police work feels too close too what I used to be.” “You don’t have to decide today.” Markus replied, “You can stay wherever you are the most comfortable until you decide on something.” “I don’t want to be a burden.” Connor deflected. “Connor, we’re your friends. We wouldn’t be offering if we didn’t want you here.” Hank argued, “That aside, I really don’t think Sumo is going to be all that keen on letting you out of his sight now that you’re back.” Connor looked down at the content Saint Bernard that had made himself at home in Connor’s lap and the space that was left on the couch. He supposed it wouldn’t be fair to any of them if he vanished again so soon after coming back. “And if you wind up deciding you would rather go soul searching again we won’t stop you.” Hank continued, “All I ask is that you keep in touch this time around.” Markus nodded his agreement, “Take a few days to rest. Think about what you want, and when you’re ready you can tell us what you decided on. We’ll wait as long as it takes.” “We just want you to be happy Con.” Hank said, “That’s where it starts.” “I’ll think about it.” He said eventually, “I missed you too, I think. Being back is nice at the very least.”

Hank and Markus smiled. “That’s all we could ask.” Markus said, “I’ve got to get back, but I’m only a ping or a call away.” “Thank you.” Connor said as Markus grabbed his things and stood. Hank ordered Sumo off of the couch and sat down beside Connor. “He worried more than he let on, we both did. We’re glad you’re okay.” Hank let out a sigh, “And I know its beating a dead horse at this point, but we care about you. If you ever feel like that again, please reach out. We can’t help you if we don’t know.” Connor nodded, “I will try and be better.” Hank smiled, “Good. Now let’s watch some shitty tv until you feel better.”

#How a Family is Built #HFB #rk1k #dbh markus #dbh connor #dbh Hank #dbh sumo #dbh fic #dbh

[misedejem]

Date Nights

Series: Persona 4 Ship: Kannao (Kanji Tatsumi/Naoto Shirogane) Word count: 9196

If ever Naoto was feeling low, Kanji would try harder than ever to show her how much he cared. Little gestures of good will and love that would go towards easing the pain. It had been that way from when they first met, and was still the case after over fifteen years.

So when Naoto found herself with Kanji in a slump and a few hours to spare, she took it upon herself to do the same.

(Basically lots of domestic future headcanon shenaningans~ As a note, Naoto is genderfluid in my fics, and this one uses she/her. AO3 link in the notes)

It had been an awfully long time since the Shiroganes had been working away from home at the same time.

Kanji had become unemployed almost two years ago and had been pooling his resources into his online store since then. And Naoto had been on leave a full year now, because of Chihiro, and then the upheaval and transfer of half the Shirogane agency from Tokyo to Yasoinaba. Save the odd local case, she’d effectively been forced to hang up the detective cap until life calmed down enough for her to return.

It was… a much-needed break. They could mutually agree on that.

Then, less than a month between moving into a house and the agency reopening, Yu Narukami had appeared on their doorstep one evening with ‘encouragement bentos’ and a request. The middle school he worked in as guidance counsellor had suddenly lost a teacher temporarily due to illness. The art teacher. She’d probably need at least six months to recover, but the new semester started in September and it was far too tight a deadline for the board to submit a request for a replacement.

“I mentioned you used to work as an art teacher in Tokyo, Kanji, and they said to ask you as soon as possible.”

Neither of them could have foreseen such a thing… But in a week, their situation had changed from both of them being at home, to both of them returning to work just a day apart from one another.

One day.

What a rare commodity that was.

As much as she adored it, Naoto’s career had always been taxing, keeping her late at night and seldom offering her a chance to catch her breath. After all, the Shirogane agency was lauded all across the country. Grampa had made such a name for it before he had died, and the attention she had gained from the media as the ‘first Detective Prince’ had only served to bolster the Shirogane name’s shining reputation once she’d taken over. That, and the fact that it was the only remaining detective agency in the country that specialised in Shadow-related incidents. They’d become ever more prevalent since the mental shutdowns and the Phantom Thieves incidents a decade ago had made knowledge of them more widespread in the seedier depths of society, and the Shadow Operatives had ensured to keep her busy when the cases grew too complex for them to handle.

That’s why they’d come back to Inaba of all places. With the TV World still very much active, it was the most potent place for illicit Shadow activities to occur in all Japan. And with the murmurings of new information cropping up, the higher ups had figured it may be a good idea to have a team of investigators to hand.

The detective had a lot of work waiting for her when her leave expired.

So, for her to be the one left with the house instead of Kanji for a full day… Well, she couldn’t exactly waste such an occasion.

“Momo, no -!  Don’t… climb in there…” Naoto sighed, watching as her orange tabby clambered her way into one of the cardboard boxes at the far end of the room. She knew it was a fruitless effort to try and stop her. Their other cat didn’t house much love for boxes, but Mochi had been found in one as a kitten and clearly had developed a natural affinity towards them as a result. Half their move had been spent trying to keep her out of them long enough to fill them.

“If you wish to help, the very least you could do would be to climb into the ones I haven’t yet searched,” she told her, crossing over to the box and hoisting Mochi out. “That way, I won’t be wasting any time by delving into boxes twice when I retrieve you.”

Unfortunately, Naoto’s request was not met with much approval. The cat just mewled indignantly, clearly unimpressed and unwilling to cooperate, and scampered behind the large pile in the centre of the garage, leaving the detective to continue her investigation on her own.

It was frankly impressive that all the miscellany crammed into these boxes had fit into their Tokyo apartment; big though it was, it had been severely lacking in storage. Half their belongings – all the stuff they didn’t desperately need - were all packed up in this room, waiting for a spare moment to be put in their rightful place. They’d had five weeks to unpack, and perhaps if they’d still been living as just the two of them, they’d have made more of a dent in it. That would certainly have made Naoto’s current task a considerable deal easier. But all the free time they had now was devoted to Chihiro. She was only just coming up on her first birthday, and she was still very much dependant on her parents every moment that she was awake. Even now, Naoto was only able to search the room because the infant was taking her midmorning nap.

She was looking for a binder Kanji had put together, containing a collection of their favourite recipes that he’d found online or written down over the years. Somehow, it had gotten separated from the recipe books when they had packed away their kitchen, and it had not yet resurfaced. This was a major blockade in her plan for the day. She needed that binder. Desperately.

Kanji had seemed rather perturbed as he’d prepared for work that morning. In fact, he’d seemed uneasy about it from the moment Yu had asked him to take it. It was… unlike him. He’d worked as an art teacher in a middle school back in the city for four years, and he’d loved every minute of it.

“Hmm? Course I want the job,” he’d told her when she’d questioned him about it over breakfast. “I miss this kinda shit, you know that.”

He had a smile on his face as he tried spooning a blob of mushed fruits into Chihiro’s mouth, but it was a strained smile if nothing else.

“You just seem tense, that’s all.”

“Yeah, well… So do you. Goin’ back to work after havin’ a kid is s’posed to be kinda rough.” He shrugged.

“I can’t deny that…” Naoto sighed. “Even knowing that your mother will be there for her, and that you’re only doing part time hours, the idea of leaving her alone at all is more taxing on me than I could ever have expected… That’s all it is though?”

Naoto could think of several other reasons Kanji might have to be nervous about this particular job. But on the off chance that they hadn’t crossed his mind yet, she refrained from bringing them up. The last thing she wanted was to make him feel worse.

There was a pause, filled only by Chihiro’s babbles and the sound of the cats zooming about the living room after one another in a burst of energy. As he scraped the last of the baby food from the pot and offered it to their daughter, Kanji’s face began to fall ever so slightly, and before long he was sighing.

“I really gotta… stop overlookin’ that I’m married to a detective.  I am scared shitless of leavin’ Chihiro for the first time. If anythin’s wrong, it’s that most of all. But uh… Otherwise I’m just a little weirded out.” He rubbed the back of his neck. “Middle school – this middle school – is kinda… where I started to get a bad rep… What… I dunno, what if they take one look at me and realise who I am and kick me out? Like, they don’t realise ‘Shirogane Kanji’ is actually ‘Tatsumi Kanji’ an’ once they do they won’t want me anymore? They don’t know why I resigned from my last job either, what if they think I did something bad an’–”

As his voice grew louder and more sporadic, his panic becoming so apparent that it was palpable, Naoto scooted her way over to him and slipped her arms around his waist, resting her head gently on his chest.

“You left on your own terms because you disliked the way the school was being run. You don’t have to disclose why. And Kan-chan… you don’t mean to tell me that I’ve kept you from your hometown for so long that you’ve forgotten what it’s like? Inaba isn’t overly massive – rumours spread fast. I daresay there isn’t a person here who doesn’t know that the Tatsumi boy married that Detective Shirogane person. Especially not with how much your mother talks about us.”

She held him close for a while, rubbing her hand across his back even after his heart stopped pounding so hard, and his muscles began to relax.

“Yeah… I know… I know it’s a stupid thing to worry about, an’ that there ain’t no point in getting’ worked up about it…”

“Well, it’s not… stupid. I’d say it’s a perfectly reasonable thing to be concerned about, given the impact it had on you in the past. But I can assure you of this: they wouldn’t have hired you if they thought you were unfit for the position.”

He nodded, and a smile appeared on his face again – a genuine one, this time. For the rest of the morning, his dour disposition had dissipated somewhat, and his spirits certainly seemed higher when he had left the house.

But even if she had managed to cheer him up, Naoto knew the day would be a challenge for him no matter how many positive sentiments she sent his way. Returning to a place you had been mistreated, even after nearly twenty years had passed, was difficult enough as it was, without the thought of leaving your baby for the first time nagging at you as well.

That’s why she needed that binder. It contained the recipe for one of Kanji’s all-time favourite curries, one she believed even she could produce, and she figured he might need something like that when he returned home.

He often did little ‘date nights’ from home for them, for birthdays or anniversaries, or even just when Naoto was struggling with a tough case and needed a distraction or treat. They would put on whatever was comfortable, sit down with a meal and a drink, and more often than not, end up in a snuggled-up heap on the couch with a movie flickering on in the background. She hosted her fair share of them as well, but admittedly hers often involved an expensive night out at a restaurant. Kanji was the better cook, and he considered it a hobby more than simply something one needed to do to survive, but Naoto lacked the skill or drive to make a hand-crafted date night even without her long hours.

But this night would be an exception. She suddenly found herself with eight hours at home without him, and she would be a fool not to use that time to surprise him in the same way he always would with her. She’d throw him a date night so damn enjoyable that he’d forget all about his anxieties, no matter the cost.

That was… if she could find the damned recipe she needed to carry out her plan.

And so, she perused box after box in her investigation, leaving not even one overlooked. Old case files she’d had sent over from the Shirogane estate that had once belonged to her grandfather. An assortment of holiday decorations that really needed separating by date. Kanji’s miscellaneous box of scrap material. A box marked for charity of Naoto’s old clothes that had stopped fitting since she’d had Chihiro. Plushies. More plushies. Even the container of extra crockery, things that had come from the kitchen itself, bore no sign of the item she sought. An hour passed as though it were seconds, yielding nothing of value.

Had Kanji already moved it? It wasn’t as though she could ask him… Had they forgotten it? No, that apartment was spotless when they’d moved out. She’d triple checked it herself.

She foresaw herself spending all day searching at this rate… but she didn’t have all day. He’d be staying late for a debriefing, but even so, Kanji would still probably be home for five o’clock, and she still had to go to Junes to fetch the ingredients she was going to need.

Perhaps she could look it up online again? That was where Kanji had found it originally…

She sat herself, cross legged, on an old rug and pulled out her phone, plugging in the name of the recipe into a search engine, lifting her arm so that Mochi – tired of hiding – could come and curl up in her lap. And then, running the fingers of her free hand through Mochi’s fur, she began to scroll and click every site she could find.

But she recalled vividly the constitution of the page she was searching for, and none of these were it. She’d never read the words herself – having never made the recipe – and Kanji had decided to crop the name of the site it was from to maintain the ‘aesthetic’ of the folder, but she knew what it looked like. The colours, the typeface, the accompanying picture.

Nothing.

It was entirely possible the site had been redesigned or deleted. In which case she was out of luck online… It wouldn’t work for her to try a different recipe, it had to be that one. If it wasn’t that one, it wouldn’t taste the same, and then it wouldn’t be his favourite. Irritation began to swell within her as her endeavour began to look more fruitless, and she had to take a few moments to breathe and calm a little before moving onto her last resort: checking with Mrs. Tatsumi, with Yakushiji, and the Investigation Team on the off chance that maybe Kanji had lent them the recipe at some point.

Nos all around.

The irritation grew stronger.

And then, as though a timer had gone off signifying the end of her allotted time, the baby monitor sprung to life.

***

“Are… You even listening?”

Naoto huffed and folded her arms, wearing her most devastating expression of disappointment as she shook her head. She’d been talking for a good ten minutes, and she was beginning to wonder if any of it had been heard at all.

“’Course we are. You want to do something cute and romantic for the big guy, because you’re secretly a massive softie, but your first idea went bust.”

Yosuke offered her a cheeky wink and raised his soda cup in a mock toast, before turning back to fawn over Chihiro in Chie’s arms.

“But I dunno how you expect us to concentrate on anything else when you’ve brought this adorable little muffin along,” Chie added, putting on a baby voice and ‘booping’ said muffin on the nose. Chihiro giggled, her tiny face absolutely beaming with delight.

“Oh, I expect you to manage perfectly. If I can – if Kanji can – despite seeing every cute thing she ever does, then it should be no problem for somebody only exposed to it for a short while.”

A couple of hours had passed since Naoto had given up her search for the original recipe and had elected to change tactic. She would simply have to find… a different meal entirely. One that would still mean as much to Kanji. But a quick scour of the recipe books they had on hand in the kitchen yielded nothing.  And so, once Chihiro was fed and dressed appropriately for the late summer warmth, she walked her over to Junes to grab some supplies, hoping that by some pure miracle, looking at the ingredients on offer would spark some form of inspiration within her. Only, out of sheer coincidence, she had managed to time her visit perfectly with the end of Yosuke’s shift, and Chie’s day off.

The two of them could often be found talking in the food court on their off-hours. It had been that way since high school, through all the changes and remodels they’d made to the layout of the store over the years and would likely continue to be that way as long as Junes stood and they remained in Inaba. It was the secret headquarters of the Investigation Team, after all. It wasn’t a place you could so easily give up.

So, guided by tradition, they all sat together, sharing a Takoyaki selection in the summer breeze – a welcome change from the mustiness of the Shirogane residence garage – Yosuke and Chie completely spellbound by the baby while Naoto explained her predicament. She had hoped they’d be a little more attentive, and frankly more helpful, but… she supposed she couldn’t fault them. Chihiro was effectively their niece, and she’d been in Tokyo for the past year.

But at least they were making her happy. Seeing her so ecstatic, despite Kanji being gone for so long, certainly helped ease some of the anxieties she had been feeling about leaving her. Getting her acquainted properly with the people who would likely be babysitting her until well into her teens was certainly not a bad thing… although… Naoto was on a tight schedule.

“Aaanyway.” She rapped the table lightly with the tips of her fingers. “Regretfully my first idea – the one that was ah… ‘bust’, as you said – was also my only idea. I’m currently running at a loss on where to proceed from here…”

At the very least they were nodding along now, and looking at her as she spoke.

“…Chie-chan, do you have date nights? What do you usually do?”

“Hmm? Yeah, of course we do! But, uh… Yukiko and I always go out for ‘em. You know, because the inn keeps her so busy and I –”

“Can’t cook anything without it coming out tasting of cardboard?” Yosuke supplied, grinning. Chie shot him a mean look, but nodded nonetheless.

“Pretty much…”

“In most instances, that would be my go-to as well,” Naoto said, holding back a grin at Yosuke’s comment. “Hand-crafted anything is Kanji’s forte, not mine, but… we both agree the ones at home are more enjoyable, no matter how good the food may be in a restaurant.”

“You’re like… the most private people I’ve ever known, so that isn’t surprising.”

She gave an affirming nod. Lovely as it was to go all out sometimes at an expensive eatery, there were always… stares. No matter where they were, people would see them and notice. Sometimes they’d simply recognise the Detective Prince, and that was all they’d see. But other times their eyes would linger longer. They’d take note of Kanji’s piercings and spikes combined with the cute animals and soft colours, analyse Naoto’s dedication to old English fashion and deliberate lack of conformity to any gender, and then keep their gazes trained on the two of them as they attempted to pick apart every contrasting aspect. The way they looked and dressed alone, the way they looked and dressed together… it made going out in public difficult for two people who both struggled to some degree with social anxieties and a history of being scrutinised for the way they were.

Kanji had left the house worrying he was going to be judged. She didn’t want to put him through that twice in one day.

“Well, is there anything else you’ve made before that you know he likes?” Yosuke asked, helping himself to the Takoyaki  

Naoto frowned. “Well, yes, but all of it is rather… typical? I have a small repertoire, you see.”

“So you want something different? Hmm… Why don’t you just go ham?” Chie suggested with a genuine smile. “Grab stuff you think’ll go together and make a totally new curry. Heck, doesn’t even gotta be curry.”

“That’s how you end up with Mystery Food X: Redux,” Yosuke warned, and Chie’s smile instantly vanished. “Though actually, Naoto… In your sensible hands you’d probably be okay. You actually know how to cook.”

“If I wasn’t holding a baby right now, I would kick you.”

“Without a recipe at all…?” For a moment, the detective was left perplexed. But before long, a thought came across her mind, and that irritation from earlier came grumbling back into her periphery. “Yosuke-kun. Please. I simply don’t have the time to spare for your… japes and mockery. I need you to be serious.”

She expected him to laugh, as he often would when she caught him out while he was joking. She didn’t do so very often, loathe as she was to admit it, and it had become something of a game to Yosuke to see how long he could keep pushing her buttons.

But this time he threw up his hands instead, with… was that his face now contorted in confusion as well?

“H-hey, I am being serious. Promise. If you genuinely have no other ideas, then I begrudgingly accept that Chie might be onto something.”

“And I’m supposed to do that without instructions?” She asked incredulously, raising her eyebrows. Was she being foolish and naïve? Or was Yosuke the one reeking of inexperience? “You act as though you believe I have time to memorise every food combination, and how to make them work. I am a detective, not a chef, Yosuke-kun. Recipes exist so that I don’t have to preoccupy my brain with trivialities such as cooking from memory.”

“Hey, it was Chie’s idea, not mine!”

“You should know better.”

The raised voices and snipes were a staple of any conversation involving Yosuke and Chie, and at this point Naoto had come to learn that it was largely performative. They ‘fought’ with warm regards. She’d even reached a point where she was able to go along with it without utterly deflating the mood. But to Chihiro, with no grasp of the concept of banter, it was all just loud, frightening noises coming from people she didn’t know all too well. The conversation very quickly had to switch courses when a crying spell threatened to rear its head.

“You know… you never asked me what I do for date nights,” Yosuke pointed out once the baby had been settled. She now lay propped up on Naoto’s lap, nodding off with her little head resting on her chest. Naoto constantly considered herself fortunate that Chihiro wasn’t especially fussy. Sometimes on a good day all she needed to calm right down was a cuddle.

“Hmm?” she looked up. If Yosuke had said anything before that, she had been too preoccupied with gently coaxing her daughter to nap to hear it. “Oh, no, I suppose I didn’t…”

Chie, who had moved into the more comfortable position of resting her chin on her hand now her arms were free, scoffed slightly.

“Dude. Maybe because you don’t have anybody to date?”

“Well… No, but I’ve been on dates. More than one with the same person. I have experience, I’m just… not experiencing it right now.” He rubbed the back of his neck, casting his gaze off to the side. “Dinner dates aren’t really my thing though…”

“So, why’d you even bring it up?”

“Hey! I’ve been on… like, one dinner date. I’m just not the guru of them!” He shrugged. “It’s an interesting story actually… I got set up a few years ago by my bandmates, and it turns out the guy isn’t my type at all. But I didn’t want to say no without at least giving him a chance, so… Y’know. He wants to go out to this fancy French place, but we get there and they’re closing early because of… Uh, I think the kitchen flooded or something like that? So, he takes me back to his place and leaves me there, runs off to go shopping, and comes back and cooks a three-course French meal himself.”

“And you didn’t marry him on the spot?”

“Nah. We did a couple more dates but it didn’t really work out. We weren’t super compatible...”

“Is this why you get Rise to vet anybody you’re gonna date now?”

“Pretty much. You guys know me best, so…”

The two of them continued to talk, but from Naoto’s perspective, their voices had been drowned by her thoughts into a dull and distant murmur. From the moment Yosuke had finished his story, the gears in her brain had whirred into motion, working their way into fabricating a plan formed from his words.

It had hit her at last. A wave of inspiration and relief, tantamount to the feeling she would have when she’d finally cracked the secret to a particularly arduous case.

A plan. Followed by a conjured image of how Kanji’s face might look when he saw it.

“Yosuke-kun…” she began, standing slowly so that she did not wake the baby and gently lowering her into the buggy she had parked next to her seat. “Would you be able to look something up for me? While my hands are full.”

***

January 19th, 2025. Little over a year and a half ago. London, England. They’d been abroad for a few weeks at that point, Naoto on a case for the Shadow Operatives, and Kanji taking advantage of her hotel room to table at an artist’s alley in a convention.

It was something of a special occasion. Kanji’s 29th birthday had been the original cause for celebration, but to him at least that was very much an aside. It was, what, only three hours prior to reaching the restaurant that they’d found out Naoto was pregnant.

There had been several sources for the reasoning behind Naoto’s choice in establishment, and unlike most of her destination picks while they’d been in London, none of them had a single thing to do with Sherlock Holmes. The ones that stood out the most: a churning in her stomach – simultaneously a mental and a physical reaction to her current condition – and a particularly mournful image of her mother-in-law from a few months prior.

“There was this little place my late husband and I would always take Kanji when he was young, if we had to travel to Okina. Italian, it was, family run. I just heard from a customer that it was recently shut down because the owner passed. It has me a little down to think of, that’s all Naoto dear.”

A precious memory from Kanji’s childhood was no small matter, harrowing as such a thing was to think. And Italian… parsing through her options in her mind as she browsed the local restaurants on one of those food apps, Naoto took note of how the one being advertised made her insides turn the least at the thoughts of it. It was one of those smaller, more community-based places, while the others were either going to be full of too-rich smells for her poor stomach to handle, or full of classy, antiquated rules and stares that she didn’t feel up to taking that day.

She didn’t want to make her husband eat hotel food on his birthday… And nor did she want to worry him all evening by being exceptionally edgy. So it didn’t take very long at all for her to have dialled the number for the family-run Italian place, and had booked them a table for two that evening.

The food had been… good. Standard fare for that kind of place. But Naoto was a harsh critic – even without feeling deeply unwell, she had been to Italy. And yet, in all the fifteen years she had known Kanji, she could not recall a single meal out where he seemed to have enjoyed himself quite as much as that. The rush of euphoria from learning he was going to be a father had apparently been enough to turn any experience he may have had that night into the best date night of his life. And Naoto knew the kind of man he was. Sentimental, perceptive, prone to dwelling on the little things. He’d remember, starkly, what he had eaten then.

It was just a pasta meal. She recalled it being made with chicken and a creamy, pesto-based sauce, and Yosuke’s internet search had quickly pulled up a recipe for something along those lines. It wouldn’t be the same – these places kept their recipes close to the heart – but that didn’t matter. Her plan had now become a case of finding something symbolic, over finding something that tasted good.

“I think he’s really starting to rub off on you,” Yosuke had noted as Naoto had prepared to rush off to grab the ingredients from the recipe he had found. “Kanji, I mean. In a good way.”

She’d queried him on that. Her own sharpness didn’t exactly extend to analysing herself.

“I just meant that five years ago, I don’t think you’d ever have thought to do something like this. I always took you for the… less cliché of the two of you. Didn’t you propose to him spontaneously in a cat café? If you don’t mind me asking… why is this the first thing you thought to do for him?”

A pause for Naoto to collect her thoughts. One that, much to everyone’s surprise, didn’t last nearly as long as it might have.

“It’s… because this is logical to me. A dinner date – it’s the simplest, most common activity in the books. It’s a cliché because its effective. Because food is one of those love languages that transcends barriers, and to somebody who struggles in most social situations, like Kanji, like me, you must understand that something like this is a life saver. It’s a change to our routine that really doesn’t change all that much.” She smiled to herself. “Kanji does this to make me feel happy. So many people do, for the person they love. It only makes sense to me that I follow their lead.”

It was that way for most matters of the heart, she thought to herself as she balanced a packet of chicken on the hood of the buggy. She had never known how to act in these situations, how to express the feelings she had. And while she’d devised some unique little ways that she had managed to convey to Kanji, oftentimes the most effective means of telling him that she loved him was to simply use another person’s idea as a foundation. She had her own experiences as proof that it worked. After all, Kanji was a person who had been so starved for and scared of affection as a child that now, almost anything that said ‘I care about you’ was enough to draw him to tears. And Naoto was no different. He was more physical than her, and really that was the only major way in which their feelings towards romance diverged. The things that made one of them happy was sure to leave the other in the same state.

***

Naoto loved Kanji more than she hated cooking. That was really the defining fact that made this entire plan of hers possible at all.

Because she really hated cooking.

“I’ll prolly be home in like… forty minutes,” Kanji had told her over the phone when she’d given him a tentative call at just gone four to gauge how long she had. Pasta wasn’t exactly something she could make well in advance – just the thought of reheating it or overcooking it made her skin crawl. It was one of those things she needed to be perfect. Kanji, thankfully, didn’t have a preference.

So, she’d had to leave making the actual meal until as close to Kanji’s arrival as she could predict. But it wasn’t as though she had time to spare… She had to make the table, feed the cats, feed the baby, put the baby down for a nap…  

Then she had to cook the chicken and the pasta… that was fine, it just… radiated a lot of heat for a day that was already rather warm. Inaba’s houses were old, and they didn’t yet have much ventilation or air conditioning.

Then was the sauce, and she had to do some vegetables, but she had to keep stirring the sauce so it didn’t ruin the consistency, and she had to keep turning the meat and the veggies so they wouldn’t burn, and oh, the pasta might stick or become overdone if she wasn’t careful. Then it would just become stressful. Every meal, every time. No matter how methodical she tried to be, it would always devolve into this.

It was a focus thing, she was sure. When she homed in on a task or a detail, it became quite difficult to switch gears on the fly. A useful skill for analysing a murder case. Not so much for cooking.

It was why, when they were both at home, she and Kanji would often just cook dinner together.

But occasionally, and for the sake of somebody she cared about, it was worth it.

She was just at the stage where she was plating up the food, trying to get it to look as it did in the picture on the website, when the familiar sight of an old, dusty car that had at one point been purple staggered its way up their driveway, starkly contrasted with the shiny motorcycle it had pulled up next to. As Kanji climbed from the car, Naoto carefully studied his face, trying to glean from his expression how exactly he was feeling in that moment. But Kanji had a naturally angry look to him, so such a task was often difficult to undertake.

“You makin’ garlic bread, Nao?” he called from the porch almost as soon as the door had slid shut.

“You’ll see,” was all she said in response. With Kanji just moments away from seeing what she had done, she found herself buzzing with anticipation.

“Wuzzat s’posed to mean?” he asked, sticking his head around the door into the kitchen.

For a moment, his forehead crinkled as he took everything in, his eyes lingering on the table made up as closely to that of a restaurant as Naoto could manage, with cloth, candles, and an arrangement of Kanji’s favourite red roses (albeit that was rather haphazardly done).

And in that moment Naoto felt as though her heart had somehow managed to stall.

But the tension was brief, quickly dissipated by the biggest, goofiest grin taking up a huge portion of Kanji’s face.

He strode into the room and pulled his partner into a powerful hug all in a motion that was so fluid, you wouldn’t think it was Kanji performing it.

“I can see you’re ready to reopen the agency, huh?”

Naoto smiled and shook her head, before snuggling her cheek into Kanji’s chest. “Don’t mistake this for a fit of boredom – I’ve been anything but. Welcome to our first date night back in Inaba.”

“Huh? W-wait, hold up… Date night? You did this… fer me?”

His eyes threatened to grow wider than his smile had those few moments earlier, as the realisation of the circumstances slowly began to dawn on him.

Then, as was customary for Kanji whenever Naoto would do anything for him ever, his face turned a brilliant shade of scarlet, and he began stammering unintelligible gibberish.

“Quickly now, before it cools down!”

“Y…Yuh…”

This was… odd. Kanji seemed unequivocally, unprecedentedly broken. His movements as he crossed to the counter and grabbed his plate, were mechanical, shaken, even. They weren’t unheard of for him, but it was as though they had suddenly been transported fifteen years into the past once more. Before they had fallen in love, before they’d even been close friends, when Kanji was so overcome with embarrassment whenever they spoke that he would be unable to function.

Now they were married, it wasn’t exactly commonplace.

Had something happened to him at work which had left him overwhelmed?

“Kanji?” Naoto called out tentatively as they took their seats.

“…huh?”

“You seem… Rather out of it.”

He blinked a couple of times and shook his head. “Right. Yeah… Sorry…”

He cleared his throat and repeated the process of shaking his head.

“It’s just, uh… ‘M kinda at a loss for words. This is… Wow.”

A tension she hadn’t recognised until it was gone suddenly flooded from her body with a sigh of relief.

“For a moment there I was concerned that something was wrong, so –”

“More like… everythin’ is right. I never pegged you fer someone who’d do date nights Tatsumi style.”

“…Tatsumi style? So this…” she waved an arm across the table. “This is something you observed… what, from your parents?”

He nodded. Naoto didn’t realise it was possible for him to turn redder until just then.

“Ain’t really a lotta options for fancy restaurants like what you do out here. Ma and my old man always improvised at home. I know cookin’ yer partner a meal ain’t somethin’ my folks made up, they just ended up callin’ it that… Nickname kinda stuck.” He rubbed the back of his head.

“Well, I suppose I have rather adopted a Tatsumi way of behaving today. Our roles have been utterly reversed. Why, I daresay after dinner, I shall take up a crochet project, and you’ll lull our Chihiro to sleep by reading her more of ‘A Study in Scarlet’.”

“I love you, Naoto.”

“Eh?”

But instead of elaborating, Kanji simply left his partner to turn an equally furious shade of red while he took a bite of the food. Naoto found herself so flustered that she didn’t even have time to be nervous about him trying the dish.

But, she supposed, she didn’t really have anything to worry about. This was Kanji.

“…I better never hear the words ‘I’m not very good at cooking’ comin’ from yer mouth again.”

“Well… Regardless of the quality of the food –” she began, about to launch into a spiel about how the mess she made, and how stressful it was for her, suggested that she technically wasn’t exactly on the level of a master. But all it took from Kanji was a single glare, and she stopped herself.

This was supposed to be a pleasant evening. And he did hate when she was self-deprecating in any capacity.

“I’m glad you like it Kan-chan.” She smiled, taking her own first bite. Hmm. Not bad. She wasn’t sure how this was supposed to taste – she’d been feeling far too unwell that night in London to eat much at all, so she’d ordered a lighter dish – but how it did taste was pleasant.

“Better than it was on my birthday that one time. Dunno if you remember, but at that one Italian place when we were in England –”

“Where do you suppose I gained the inspiration to make this particular meal?”

“Huh? Well shit, haha. Last time I ever doubt yer memory.”

“Hm, well… I don’t think I’m capable of forgetting that day…”

Kanji slid his free hand across the table and placed it atop hers, rubbing his thumb soothingly over her knuckles. Strange, she noted, that the nail was still painted black; she was sure the school would make him take the colour off alongside his piercings.

A nagging feeling in her chest, her stomach, her mind was begging her to ask him how it had gone. But it was not the only train of thought on the feeling that she had. What if Kanji didn’t want to talk about it yet? What if it was best to simply… enjoy the meal in ignorant bliss? Was he waiting for the right time, or for her to say something?

He looked as though he were about to speak now, was that the subject he was going to bring up?

“How has Chihiro been today?”

No. Of course not. The subject of work would have to wait.

As with… most of their conversations over the past year, the rest of the meal was largely dominated with Chihiro. Naoto describing, in detail, exactly what she had done, and Kanji’s expression growing fonder and fonder with every word. By the time they were done eating, he looked as though he were going to cry.

“Kinda sad that this is our lives goin’ forwards…”

“Hm?”

“Nothin’… just been missin’ her at work is all.”

The nagging feeling was very quickly becoming anxiety. The first mention of his day all evening, and it was something negative.

“Kanji, was everything –”

A sound suddenly stole her words before she had the chance to finish. A baby crying, as audible through the walls as it was the baby monitor on the counter.

“Prolly needs changing, huh?” Kanji smiled, rising to his feet. “Mind if I take this?”

“Please… She probably misses you too.”

In the time that Kanji was attending to the baby, Naoto managed to load everything that needed cleaning into the dishwasher, and found her way to the living room, and then to the couch. But her mind wasn’t exactly responsive as she did so.

Kanji… was worse than she had anticipated… More than just a simple meal could possibly hope to fix. Why on earth… What delusion had she been under to think, with how he’d been these past few days, that a little romantic gesture would be all he needed to feel better.

Amidst the haze that was buzzing in her mind, she vaguely registered her hands clenching into fists.

At some point, goodness knew when, Kanji had reappeared in the room and had sat down next to her, taking off his glasses and rubbing the bridge of his nose.

“She’s back down. Heh… Wanted to play as soon as she saw me, the little tyke, but could barely keep her eyes open long enough to do it.”

“She’s had… a busy day.”

“Ain’t we all?” he said with an air of exhaustion about him, placing his glasses gently on the kotatsu in front of them and then sinking back into the couch. “You ready for tomorrow?”

“I’ve been ready for weeks. Waiting on other people…” Naoto mumbled in response. Her gaze had fallen as she’d spoken to her socks, and she could not bring herself to remove it until Kanji nudged her with his arm.

“Hey. You good, Nao?”

“…Are you?”

That brought the conversation to a standstill.

“Would ya believe me if I told ya I was jus’ tired?”

“Only… partially.”

He gave her a half smile and repositioned himself so that his head lay on her shoulder.

“It was… a pretty exhaustin’ day… Lotta new stuff. Lotta old stuff too… that school ain’t changed in twenty years. Amazing it’s managed so long.”

Naoto just made an affirming noise and let her hand come to rest on his shoulder, pressing her cheek onto the top of his head. Best just to let him speak, she thought.

“Ain’t none of the people I knew still there but… they knew who I was. Course they did… didn’t expect any different. An’ you know what?”

“Hm?”

“Most of ‘em just complimented me on the plushies. They knew me ‘cause of the shop, not… ‘cause of the delinquent shit.”

“Well, that’s… good, is it not? That’s what we hoped would happen.”

She felt him shift his head as though he were trying to nod. His arm had worked its way around her waist, and she felt him bunching up the fabric of her dress shirt in his fingers as he spoke. It was an unconscious habit of his. Most notable when he was nervous.

“Yeah… Never said it weren’t good. Jus’ that I was tired. And that I missed my kid. And you.”

Naoto drew a deep breath. “It seemed like something was wrong, that’s all. I’ve been worried about you. All day. All week.”

“…That why you’re not okay?”

“Yes! Effectively!”

Another brief standstill.

“Sorry ‘bout that… Really… Last thing I wanted was for my bullshit worrying over nothing to affect you too.”

Naoto squeezed his shoulder slightly.

“You should know by now that such a thing is impossible. The same can be said of you, to me. We’ve been in this partnership since we were in high-school, Kan-chan, we can’t simply… hide our true feelings any longer. We know each other too well to be caught out.”

“Yeah… s’pose you’re right… I did appreciate it though. Back before I went in today and realised my worries were a load ‘a crap. I… I dunno, I guess comin’ back to Inaba after so long had me thinkin’ that everythin’ was gonna go back to the way it was.”

“Kanji… You weren’t… Please don’t tell me you’ve been thinking that way since we first planned to come.”

Silence. Naoto’s heart dropped. Obviously, that meant she was right on the mark.

Good lord, she had still been expecting when they’d first discussed moving back! Their daughter was one in a week!

“’s in the past now though. All of it,” he said eventually. “Physically this place ain’t no different, but I guess the vibe has changed since we were kids. Maybe… Enough time has passed now that I ain’t gotta worry about… the guy I was.”

“Kanji… I rescind what I said earlier. About how it’s impossible to hide our feelings from each other. Please… when it’s something serious like this, I implore you to tell me.”

Her eyes stung, but she refused to cry. If she did, he’d try to make this about her, and dammit, she was tired of it being about her. The entire point of everything she had done that day was to make it about Kanji for once in his life.

“…’M sorry, Nao…”

After that, for a long while neither of them spoke. They simply adjusted themselves into a position where they could more easily cuddle and sat there, snuggled into each other as the dwindling oranges and purples of the twilight sky gave way to darkness.

Kanji was the one to break the silence, his voice so slick with sleepiness that it was demure in a way which was much unlike him.

“Hey Nao… Yer still awake, right?”

“Mmhmm…” she responded. It was… mostly true.

“Y’know, I’ve been thinkin’. I got a new goal now we’re back here… I wanna be able to look that bastard in the eye and tell him he ain’t me. Not because I’m denyin’ anythin’, but because he ain’t.”

“Him? Your Shadow?”

“Yeah. Like you can, y’know? If your Shadow popped their head back up and started sayin’ the same shit as before, you could just tell ‘em: ‘you’re wrong.’ ‘Cause they would be.”

“But they wouldn’t say something like that. My age and gender no longer cause me grief to the level they had in my youth, so my Shadow wouldn’t bring them up.”

Of course, they wouldn’t. Naoto thought that was obvious. She was thirty-one, very much an adult, and any doubt she had about whether she was a man or a woman were significantly eased when she had learned that she could be both and neither. She had no lack of confidence in those aspects of herself, regardless now of what other people thought, so there was no way the Shadow could use them as ammunition if they were to reappear.

But based on Kanji’s next statement, suddenly full of more vigour than his words prior, she wondered if perhaps she had misunderstood where he was coming from.

“Yeah, but that’s what I’m saying! The stuff your Shadow said back then… It ain’t even crossin’ your mind anymore. I wanna be the same… I mean… It’s not that I ain’t happy with who I am. I like cute shit, and sewing, and all the stuff like that. Shit, I’m bi as hell. I can say that stuff proudly. It’s…” he huffed. “For some reason, it’s like I can be confident in myself all I want, but in my head it don’t mean shit unless everyone else feels the same way. An' as long as I got a history as 'the guy who beats up bikers', it's like that day ain't gonna come... I’m… still scared shitless of bein’ rejected after all these years... It’s like… every time I meet a new group of people, I just end up wonderin’ how long its gonna be before they brand me a thug and cut me and everyone I care about off. Think that’s kinda the reason it’s been weighin’ on me again so much more recently. I start comin’ up with scenarios in my head where it gets outta hand and Chihiro gets hurt ‘cause of it.”

As he spoke, his hug became tighter.

“Kan-chan…”

“So, my goal is to get to a place where I don’t constantly worry about that stuff. Where if that bastard showed up again and said that kinda shit, I could deny him with my whole heart and know for certain that I’m right an’ he’s wrong. An’ before you say shit, I know that ain’t how Shadows work. That’s jus’ the image I use in my head to try an’ visualise what I’m itchin’ to do.”

He added that last part with a hint of a laugh to his tone.

So that was why he took a job he was so caught up about? As some concrete way of proving to himself that he would be okay if he did?

A self-destructive means of gathering evidence for a hypothesis… hm… perhaps Naoto’s inheritance of Kanji’s traits over the years had gone the other way as well.

“I didn’t realise it was possible to be so unbelievably proud of somebody, while simultaneously thinking them a fool…” Naoto ensured to keep her own tone bright, so that he would know she spoke in endearing terms. “You know I would have supported you through this if only you had told me –”

“Hah. Yer actin’ like you take me for the kinda guy who thinks this shit through… this ain’t exactly something I’ve been plannin’ or nothin’, it just sorta… came to me now.”

Oh, so it was a subconscious instinct?

Then perhaps he would be safe from her bad influence for just a little while longer…

“Well… regardless of how much preparation has gone into it… it is a good goal to have in mind, so long as you’re comfortable with the pain it may bring in the process.”

“Yeah. No problem. Anyway…” he sat up and looked her in the eyes. “What was that you were implyin’ with the whole ‘you know I would have supported you’ bull you just said?”

Naoto frowned. “It’s the truth –”

“Yeah, I know it’s the truth. Because you have been supportin’ me, dumbass. You ain’t ever stopped.” He thrust his arm in the vague, general direction of the kitchen, a wild delight dancing in his eyes. “You spent the last day of yer maternity leave makin’ sure I’d have a good evenin’ because you thought I needed cheerin’ up.”

Naoto felt her cheeks heat up. “I… I only did what you would do for me…”

“Yeah, but it ain’t like I made you do it. You still made the decision. It’s amazin’, an yer incredible, and adorable, an’ you make a freakin’ awesome pasta, an’ I can’t believe how lucky I am to have you.”

She knew she was blushing harder and harder with every word, to the point where all she could think to do was bury her face into his shoulder.

“Feel kinda bad that we kinda got side-tracked from the ‘date night’ though… Sorry if you had anything else planned.”

“No, no, don’t feel bad. I did this because I thought you needed it, Kanji. And I don’t suppose I’m wrong in suggesting that you very much needed this talk as well?”

“…You ain’t wrong… Not at all.”

“And do you feel any better for having it?”

“Mmhmm.”

Naoto lifted her head and gave him her warmest smile. “Then I can safely declare this date night a resounding success.”

“Damn right, you can! But uh… I don’t wanna take away from anythin’ else you mighta wanted to do, so –”

The heat in her cheeks returned as quickly as it had vanished, and she sheepishly averted his gaze. Right. Date night was usually more than a meal.

“Uhm... About that. Kanji, I’ll be perfectly honest with you, I… I was so caught up in trying to find a recipe for dinner that it never even occurred to me to look for a movie or something to do afterwards.”

She offered him an apologetic look, but his immediate response was only to laugh and hold her closer.

“Don’t think I coulda made it through a movie anyway… I’m beat…”

“As am I. I think I may drift off here…”

It quickly became apparent that each of their ideal end to the evening would be to turn in early and hope to gain a restful night – something that was near impossible with a small child. Whether such a thing was an indication of how eventful their day had been, or whether it was simply a sign of them getting older, neither really cared to consider. Instead, they just ensured the house was secure, called the cats to follow them, and moved upstairs as quietly as they could so that their footsteps wouldn’t cause Chihiro to stir.

It wasn’t until Naoto had switched her outfit for one of Kanji’s old shirts and was brushing her teeth in the upstairs bathroom that it dawned on her: there was still one aspect of her day that had yet to be cleared up.

And now that it had come to mind, she feared she may be unable to sleep until she had an answer.

“Kan-chan?”

“Hm?”

“You know the binder you keep with recipe print-outs…? Do you have any idea what box it’s in?”

His face was mostly buried by the bedsheets by now, but she could tell from the part she could see that he was thinking hard.

“Uh… Oh! My car.”

“…Your car?”

“Yeah. I didn’t want the other kitchen stuff to squash it, so I put it separate. I see it every time I go in there an’ I keep saying I’ll bring it in and never do. How come…?”

Naoto heaved a great sigh and flopped on the bed besides him. It wasn’t until her face hit the pillow that she realised exactly how exhausting her day had been. “So you had it all along… I never would have found it.”

“You were lookin’ for it?”

“I was. I wanted to make you that curry instead, the one you called your favourite.”

“Ohhhh. I getcha now." He laughed. "That woulda been a good choice. But y’know anythin’ would have been fine. I got a real soft-spot for Italian food, hehe.”

“I like that curry myself though,” she added, as she shuffled under the covers. “It’s rare to find something spicy that you can handle as much as I…”

“You do, huh? I see.”

There was silence for a while. And then…

“Hey, Naoto…?”

“Mmm?”

“When’s your next day off?”

“My next day off…? That would be Sunday… Why?”

But Kanji didn’t answer. Instead, he just leaned over to kiss her goodnight, and then, with a sleepy smile, he rolled over and went to sleep.

#persona 4 #kanji tatsumi #naoto shirogane #kannao #misede writes

[nyxi-styx]

Reflecting

I don’t normally do a year in review, but this was such an interesting year of ups and downs. That meme about “I was somehow living both my best life and worst life simultaneously” is true. At least in my case.

January to March didn’t bring me much of anything. I did, however, start working on my drawing skills. I didn’t stick to it as much as I would have liked, but I’ve found that I’m actually really good at drawing in the Rick & Morty style. Unfortunately, I was also raped this year. It wasn’t forceful or violent and I was afraid to say “no” verbally, but my body language and resistance should have been clue enough that I did not want it.

In April, I was able to go and meet Sean Astin at Indiana Comic Con. It was brief, but memorable. He was so sweet and funny and undeniably handsome. I was glad I was able to make that dream come true for my mom and that she and my little sister could enjoy their first convention with me. 

In May, I got to be with my very best friends again in Los Angeles where we were able to explore gorgeous Santa Monica. I became closer with a friend I’ve confided in regularly for quite some time. I did not get to meet Andrew Scott again, which was heartbreaking, but I did get a wonderful, intimate convention experience with so many other Sherlock people I love, particularly Sian Brooke. A week later, I got to see @therealjacksepticeye live on stage in Indianapolis at the Old National Center, which was quite a fun experience. His “Positive Mental Attitude” movement has really gotten me through a lot this year which led me to getting my fourth tattoo in June. Immediately after that, I was fortunate enough to attend Indy Pop Con for a second time and meet @crankgameplays

In July, I was given the privilege and honor of being the photographer for my aunt’s long-awaited wedding, which was a beautiful and intimate affair. I also had the pleasure of seeing Rob Zombie and Marilyn Manson live in concert at their Twins of Evil Tour Indianapolis show, both artists which were on my bucket list. It was truly something to behold and won’t easily be forgotten.

From late June to late September, I was in a relationship which caused me to learn a lot about myself. Unfortunately, I had to end it when it became clear that we were just far too incompatible to continue. Honestly, I don’t wish her any ill, but I hope she learns some things about life and relationships. It boiled down to immaturity and anticipating/understanding my needs the way I did with her.

August saw me abruptly quit a job I had been with and loved for a year due to an abusive change in management. The old manager had been a friend and a wonderful leader. The new manager was verbally abusive to all employees, paranoid, neurotic and so many other things. I literally could not handle it mentally anymore and left after my shift, never to return. I’m not proud of that, but I had to do what I had to do for my own mental wellbeing. I immediately started looking for a new hotel job, but was left unemployed for a month. I just barely managed to keep my head above water.

In September, I started my new job at an upscale hotel in Downtown Indianapolis that is part of the Marriott franchise. It’s different in many ways from the hotel I used to work at and I’m still trying to find my groove, but I work with some really wonderful people and I have an amazing boss again. He’s a great leader and very friendly and down to earth. I was also able to go and see Pentatonix in concert with my cousins. Another fantastic experience. It was so much fun and I’ll cherish that memory for a very long time. Later that same month, I hosted friends at my home and was able to attend my final Supernatural convention in Indianapolis. I got some wonderful photos and was able to be on stage again for karaoke. I can’t think of a better end to my attendance at these conventions. Especially considering that weekend’s Saturday Night Special was, by far, the best I’d ever attended. I wish I could continue to go, but their increased prices that don’t seem to have a ceiling are preventing me from going. I wouldn’t have been able to go to this one at all without the help and generosity of my friends.

In October, I was able to meet Tom Hiddleston. Unfortunately, it did not go as well as planned which unfortunately left be feeling a little flat and slightly brokenhearted, but it was still a good experience and I can’t quite believe I didn’t fail it entirely. As an added bonus, I got to meet Tim Jacobus who was part of my childhood in that he was the artist for the majority of the Goosebumps novels. I also finally got to work at my first ever haunted house and met some truly amazing friends in the process. Unfortunately, I did not get to celebrate my 26th birthday as I worked all day at both my regular full-time job at the haunted house, but I’m thankful that I had jobs to work at. I unfortunately also worked on Halloween which was soul-crushingly sad for me.

November, unfortunately is where everything got horrible. Everything was okay until Thanksgiving when I received a notice to vacate on my door. I am thankful it wasn’t an eviction notice. I was able to stay with a friend temporarily and I am forever grateful to her for opening her home to me. November was also the time in which I discovered Shane Dawson and I am glad I did because it was his humor and deep distractions that got me through the very difficult time between homes. He’s very relatable and him being so open and public about his own body dysphoria makes me feel seen and heard and understood. He refuses to let his bisexuality be erased. He’s an overall kind and genuine person.

In December, I have moved into a new, accessible cheaper place. I’ll be getting together with family at the holidays when I’m not working and overall I’m just going to keep doing the best I can. Oh and I’ve recently taken up makeup! I can’t wait to keep improving on that front as well.

Overall, it’s been a year full of both highs and lows. I cannot wait to see what things 2019 has for me.

[all-things-andrew-scott]

Reflecting

I don’t normally do a year in review, but this was such an interesting year of ups and downs. That meme about “I was somehow living both my best life and worst life simultaneously” is true. At least in my case.

January to March didn’t bring me much of anything. I did, however, start working on my drawing skills. I didn’t stick to it as much as I would have liked, but I’ve found that I’m actually really good at drawing in the Rick & Morty style. Unfortunately, I was also raped this year. It wasn’t forceful or violent and I was afraid to say “no” verbally, but my body language and resistance should have been clue enough that I did not want it.

In April, I was able to go and meet Sean Astin at Indiana Comic Con. It was brief, but memorable. He was so sweet and funny and undeniably handsome. I was glad I was able to make that dream come true for my mom and that she and my little sister could enjoy their first convention with me.

In May, I got to be with my very best friends again in Los Angeles where we were able to explore gorgeous Santa Monica. I became closer with a friend I’ve confided in regularly for quite some time. I did not get to meet Andrew Scott again, which was heartbreaking, but I did get a wonderful, intimate convention experience with so many other Sherlock people I love, particularly Sian Brooke. A week later, I got to see Jacksepticeye live on stage in Indianapolis at the Old National Center, which was quite a fun experience. His “Positive Mental Attitude” movement has really gotten me through a lot this year which led me to getting my fourth tattoo in June. Immediately after that, I was fortunate enough to attend Indy Pop Con for a second time and meet another Youtuber I enjoy, Ethan Nestor (CrankGameplays).

In July, I was given the privilege and honor of being the photographer for my aunt’s long-awaited wedding, which was a beautiful and intimate affair. I also had the pleasure of seeing Rob Zombie and Marilyn Manson live in concert at their Twins of Evil Tour Indianapolis show, both artists which were on my bucket list. It was truly something to behold and won’t easily be forgotten.

From late June to late September, I was in a relationship which caused me to learn a lot about myself. Unfortunately, I had to end it when it became clear that we were just far too incompatible to continue. Honestly, I don’t wish her any ill, but I hope she learns some things about life and relationships. It boiled down to immaturity and anticipating/understanding my needs the way I did with her.

August saw me abruptly quit a job I had been with and loved for a year due to an abusive change in management. The old manager had been a friend and a wonderful leader. The new manager was verbally abusive to all employees, paranoid, neurotic and so many other things. I literally could not handle it mentally anymore and left after my shift, never to return. I’m not proud of that, but I had to do what I had to do for my own mental wellbeing. I immediately started looking for a new hotel job, but was left unemployed for a month. I just barely managed to keep my head above water.

In September, I started my new job at an upscale hotel in Downtown Indianapolis that is part of the Marriott franchise. It’s different in many ways from the hotel I used to work at and I’m still trying to find my groove, but I work with some really wonderful people and I have an amazing boss again. He’s a great leader and very friendly and down to earth. I was also able to go and see Pentatonix in concert with my cousins. Another fantastic experience. It was so much fun and I’ll cherish that memory for a very long time. Later that same month, I hosted friends at my home and was able to attend my final Supernatural convention in Indianapolis. I got some wonderful photos and was able to be on stage again for karaoke. I can’t think of a better end to my attendance at these conventions. Especially considering that weekend’s Saturday Night Special was, by far, the best I’d ever attended. I wish I could continue to go, but their increased prices that don’t seem to have a ceiling are preventing me from going. I wouldn’t have been able to go to this one at all without the help and generosity of my friends.

In October, I was able to meet Tom Hiddleston. Unfortunately, it did not go as well as planned which unfortunately left be feeling a little flat and slightly brokenhearted, but it was still a good experience and I can’t quite believe I didn’t fail it entirely. As an added bonus, I got to meet Tim Jacobus who was part of my childhood in that he was the artist for the majority of the Goosebumps novels. I also finally got to work at my first ever haunted house and met some truly amazing friends in the process. Unfortunately, I did not get to celebrate my 26th birthday as I worked all day at both my regular full-time job at the haunted house, but I’m thankful that I had jobs to work at. I unfortunately also worked on Halloween which was soul-crushingly sad for me.

November, unfortunately is where everything got horrible. Everything was okay until Thanksgiving when I received a notice to vacate on my door. I am thankful it wasn’t an eviction notice. I was able to stay with a friend temporarily and I am forever grateful to her for opening her home to me. November was also the time in which I discovered YouTuber, Shane Dawson and I am glad I did because it was his humor and deep distractions that got me through the very difficult time between homes. He’s very relatable and him being so open and public about his own body dysphoria makes me feel seen and heard and understood. He refuses to let his bisexuality be erased. He’s an overall kind and genuine person.

In December, I have moved into a new, accessible cheaper place. I’ll be getting together with family at the holidays when I’m not working and overall I’m just going to keep doing the best I can. Oh and I’ve recently taken up makeup! I can’t wait to keep improving on that front as well.

Overall, it’s been a year full of both highs and lows. I cannot wait to see what things 2019 has for me.

[random2908]

So, tomorrow--I guess today, now--is the 10th anniversary of my Grandma’s death. You know, I haven’t talked about her much on tumblr. I’ve mentioned her some, but for how important she was in my life, I mostly haven’t--

Looking through my tags, like half my posts are complaints that she doesn’t have a wikipedia page even though there are a few pages that have empty links with her name. I don’t know that I want to her to have one, though; it would make her not mine anymore, and I don’t want to see her belong to the world, paraded out for NPOV criticism. I don’t think she would have minded, though--she was a private person but she would have approved of NPOV criticism.

What do I say about her? It’s my blog, so I guess I say what she meant to me.

About a year ago, when my middle sister temporarily moved to NYC, my best friend invited her out to dinner; they were loosely friends, themselves, from both having lived in Singapore previously. My middle sister brought my little sister along, although she’d only met my best friend twice--way back when she was a kid--and didn’t know her. My best friend told me that most of the conversation at dinner took place between my two sisters. It was the two of them lamenting Grandma’s death nine years previous, and that they didn’t know her better. My little sister--who was 20 when Grandma died and nearly 30 when this conversation took place--lamented that Grandma had never seen her grow up, and wished she could have had an adult relationship with Grandma rather than just being a little kid in her eyes. No, she amended, she wished she could have grown up to be someone who Grandma would have respected and been proud of, and then had a real relationship with her. Impossible, my middle sister allegedly pointed out.

I once found a poem about her online, on some guy’s blog; he’d apparently taken classes from her in grad school. The poem was about how he’d seen a tiny old lady walking down the street who reminded him of her, and felt a moment of fear.

Grandma was both a good person and not a good person; both kind and unkind. My dad liked to say of her that stupid people thought she was nice. I countered that she was nice to me. But I was the exception, because I was her, but a child again. I was well aware that she was mean to everyone else. But she was absolutely polite, and some people can’t tell the difference between polite and nice, can’t hear the barbs when there’s no tone of voice to give a clue. She was verbally cruel to people who loved her and needed her, but she fully financially supported any of her offspring who were unemployed (she supported my cousin and his wife and kids for years) and she gave immense amounts of money to charity. Literally a fortune--millions of dollars, nearly everything she had. In one draft of her will, more money was going to Planned Parenthood alone than to all of her offspring combined. Everyone tells me I shouldn’t read into that, she just really cared about women’s health (having personally had a lot of medical issues relating to that). But it was Grandma. You’d be a fool not to read into everything she did.

(I hate when people do that to me. I hate when people read between the lines of everything I say and do, assume that because I’m me every word is carefully chosen, everything I say has layers of intent. It isn’t true. Not of me--not of me as an adult, anyway, although I can forgive the people who knew me in the worst parts of my teens for assuming it. But now, most of what I say is off-the-cuff, flippant, mostly meaningless, and no harm intended; if something I say seems hurtful, it’s nearly always careless and accidental tactlessness rather than artifice. It may have been true of her, though; everyone says it was. But if it’ isn’t true of me--how can I know what was and wasn’t true of her when she was 71 years older than me?)

I had a lot of personality in common with her as a kid. I was the best in my school in every academic subject (at least until I went to a magnet school for high school). I was ambitious to the point where my parents refused to send me to either of the competitive magnet high schools in our area. Whether they had in mind that I might be a danger to myself because I wouldn’t care about angering dangerous people for the sake of setting the curve in class, or whether they thought that I might be a danger to classmates who might have challenged me in an environment where violence and cheating lurked in the school culture just beneath the surface, I’m not sure; in any case, that’s what informed their decision to send me to the least competitive magnet high school. When I was 14, I once overheard my mom complain to a friend that she’d moved all the way out to California, far from her parents, but now they’d moved out here, and between Grandma and me she had generational stereo and basically got it all twice.

And why not? She was everything I aspired to be. She was a successful scientist who’d shattered glass ceilings--she’d finished a PhD at Harvard at age 22, decades before they officially started accepting women, and she was one of the founders of her subfield. She was respected by all. Everything that she said was intelligent and clever and multilayered. Why shouldn’t I want to be her? Who wouldn’t want to be her?

I have an aunt--my uncle’s girlfriend--who was scared of me when I was a kid. She’d heard the family rumors that I was Grandma all over again. And any reasonable person was scared of Grandma; her being in 8-year-old form was no less terrifying. My aunt was in her 50s when I was 8. I’ve changed her mind about me, though; she likes me now, as an adult.

My parents still think I’m Grandma. My siblings do, too, but then I point out that nearly any trait they can name that they think I got from her--other than ambition--I more likely got from our dad. (There’s a joke in there about people marrying their parents--my mom married her mother, I guess.) My dad thinks I have her cruelty. My mom just thinks I have her speech patterns, but my mom wouldn’t call anyone she cared about “cruel”--she’s too nice to say something like that. (No one knows how Grandma could possibly have given birth to and raised someone with my mom’s personality.)

The summer before she died, I called her up for her birthday. (It was the second to last time I ever talked to her.) With all her meds she was more than a little confused and had lost most of that filter that made stupid people think she was nice. She immediately launched into talking about my siblings and cousins. When she got to my little sister, and said of her that she’d grown up to be so pretty... I think she realized she’d gone too far, because she cut off and said, “But I’ve always been fond of you.” There it was, at the very end. I was the only one of her grandchildren that she really liked. At 25 years old, I was plenty old enough to know that didn’t reflect well on me.

She died three days before I turned 26, and nine months before I defended my thesis. I was so disappointed she didn’t live to see me get my PhD. I put her in the acknowledgements of my dissertation, of course. When I’d been getting ready to publish my first paper, she put days into reading it. She was a psychologist and I’m a physicist, but she put in the effort. Every day, for three days, she’d call me on the phone and tell me about the paragraphs she’d read so far, and we’d discuss what they meant, and she’d tell me what edits she thought I should make. For three days, reading my first paper was her life’s purpose. And you know, she read the whole thing, and understood it more or less, even though it was in a field that not only was several degrees removed from hers, but that had barely even existed when she was in grad school.

I was disappointed that she didn’t live to see me get my PhD, but I’d burned out and my career stalled out after that. I was always so relieved that she died just in time to never see me betray her like that.

In the end, I decided not to be her. Not to be the scientific success she was, perhaps, although I still have decades ahead of me there. But mainly not to be her. Not to sound like her. Not to say the mean things she’d say, not to evoke the fear she evoked. It’s hard work, and sometimes I feel like I’m rejecting my deep-down self in the process. But I’ve succeeded; maybe I’m not quite who I try to be but I’m not her anymore.

[theclacks]

Buffy (Season 5) & Angel (Season 2) Thoughts

So, I was watching these at a pretty slow pace... and then Fool For Love happened. And I went from watching approx 1 episodes a day to 5 episodes a day.

As always thoughts below the cut. (Previous thoughts: Buffy 1 & 2, Buffy 3, Buffy 4 & Angel 1). 

Buffy - Season 5

On how it compares with past seasons...

So, season 2 is STILL my all time favorite. I did like season 5 over both season 3 AND season 4 though, which is probably because of totally because of Spike. But at the same time, I don’t think it can be disconnected from season 4. Like season 5 is really the second half of season 4. Xander finding his place in society is directly linked to his issues of being a basement bum in season 4. Giles becoming the Magic Box’s owner is directly linked to his issues with being unemployed in season 4. Riley’s issues with being Riley is... well, because he’s Riley but yeah.

On Riley...

Going to get him out of the way, so I can talk about other things. I like that their relationship fell apart naturally over the course of several episodes. And I think it was a good tie that Spike was the one who��“caused” it because, like The Yoko Factor last season, it was him “causing” rifts that were really already there. (And in this case didn’t even “cause” it so much as play delivery boy.)

I’ve been reading some fanfic in between eps, and so much of it (in fics where Riley’s involved) includes lines to the general tune of “Buffy never REALLY liked Riley” or “Riley rarely ever gave Buffy orgasms” and I think that’s unfair because Riley was a nice guy. And I appreciate the writers tried her out in a relationship like that because sometimes relationships aren’t this grand life-or-death emotional cocktail. Sometimes one party’s just a little bit more in love with one side than the other. Sometimes they have miscommunication issues. Sometimes that’s enough. And sometimes it isn’t.

On Dawn...

I liked her. I thought she was going to be annoying, but I liked her. Maybe it’s the younger sister in me. I loved her buddy-buddy relationship with Spike. I liked her whole backstory and status as the key, which I had no idea/prior knowledge about going it. In fact, before I started watching, I knew Buffy eventually got a sister, but I assumed it was some divorce thing and Joyce eventually got full custody or something. Then as I started watching the show, I knew that couldn’t be the case, and for the first four seasons I was theorizing between long lost sibling, Joyce suddenly has a baby and the baby gets stuck in a time loop or demon dimension until it reaches middle school age, etc, so it was kind of cool having all of that play out.

On Anya and Giles...

I just want to give a little shout out to them because other than Dawn & Spike, theirs was my favorite unexpected relationship. I like how their development both paired and contrasted Buffy & Giles, how the writers balanced the fatherly aspect of Giles with the more short-tempered, professional boss aspect.

On Ben/Glory...

I think they could’ve done a bit more with the Ben side of Ben and Glory. I liked the development he got at the end and how he ultimately picked Glory’s side without fully picking it, and I loved how Giles tossed aside the “hero” mantra and ended him, but yeah. I just feel like there could’ve been a bit “more” even when I don’t know what that “more” is.

As for Glory, I love her. And even though I get from Glory’s end why her appearances were scattered throughout the year (being literally scatterbrained and all) but it doesn’t make a whole lot of sense why Buffy waited until after Dawn had been kidnapped to try and take her out. Like, yes, Buffy was scared and had to be backed into a corner (and Willow-pep-talked out of it), but their main attack plan revolved around having the God-forged hammer and the golden orb thing. THEY HAD THE GOLDEN ORB THING THE ENTIRE TIME. THEY KNEW IT HAD GLORY-REPELLING POWERS. WHY WERE THEY LETTING THE ORB CHILL IN THE BASEMENT THIS WHOLE TIME? I mean, and considering the fact the orb only stopped her for a couple seconds, narratively, they could’ve used it earlier. I kind of wish there’d been a mid-season episode where they tried to launch a full attack with the orb and what not, and failed and almost got Dawn discovered/killed, and THEN they could’ve been like “welp, we tried a full attack and exhausted our god-repelling items, okay, NOW let’s go into avoidance mode.” IDK, this is me. Backseat writing. Because I think that was the one main issue for me this season that could’ve taken the overarching plot from good to great.

On Joyce...

The Body was an amazing episode. I didn’t even realize until I was reading AV Club’s recap/review of it that there was no background music during the whole thing. And I was still riveted. I think one of my favorite bits of the entire season, perhaps the entire series, is when Willow is freaking out over her blue sweater and Anya - who’s missed the majority of the freak out - ends up sitting on it and stuffing it back into the closest drawer. It was such an understated moment, and while watching I wanted Tara or Xander to notice, or for Willow to check her drawers one last time, but then she would have her sweater and things would be okay... except they wouldn’t be because Joyce is still dead and something as small as a sweater doesn’t matter at all in the long run.

And Joyce is another reason why I’m glad that Dawn became a thing this season because it gave her more screen time. Lack of Joyce-screen time was probably one of my least favorite things about season four. I mean, it made sense because of college and independence and all of that, but I don’t care. I love Joyce. I like having her on my screen. And I will miss her.

On Spike...

HELLO NEW FAVORITE EPISODE IN THE FORM OF FOOL FOR LOVE. But before I get into that, let’s have a moment of silence for the glorious friendship that was Spike/Joyce. From shared relationship-talk over marshmallows and chocolate to geekish fangirling over the soap opera passions, they were and forever will be, my Buffy BroTP. I’m so happy that the writers gave him a small scene where he showed up with flowers for Joyce because I would’ve needed closure. (*shakes a fist angrily at Steven Moffat for writing off Amy and Rory without a filmed canon scene of saying goodbye to Rory’s dad*)

But yeah. Fool For Love aka MY DEMAND FOR A SPIKE FLASHBACK EPISODE IN SEASON THREE WAS RETROACTIVELY MET. And it was awesome. Spike as a repressed poet was amazing, and what makes it even better is that I was reading a fanfic last month and got spoiled for that detail, but the fanfic was just off enough with its dialogue and characterization and the idea of Spike as a bloody awful poet was so ridiculous that I tossed the detail aside as fluffy, silly head canon. Also did I miss/misinterpret some dialogue in season 2? Because I could’ve sworn in season 2 that Dru and Spike were vamp-siblings with Angel being their mutual sire. But I’m totally fine with it being this way too.

Anyway, I could go on and on about the Buffy/Spike relationship in this season, but I won’t because I want to wrap this up and start season 6, so I’ll just say:

- favorite bit of James Marsters acting, beyond the end of Fool For Love with him in the alley with Buffy’s cash and beyond the end of Gift with him outright sobbing, would be his bit at the end of Crush where he realizes Buffy has dis-invited him from her house; I think I rewatched that bit 3+ times because the betrayal and hurt in his eyes is just so good

- also re: the end of Crush, I love how his hurt stems not just from Buffy shutting him out, but him getting shut out from the whole Summers family because at that point he’s friends with Joyce, he’s friends with Dawn, he wants to be a part of their family... which I think really ties into the flashback bits of Fool For Love too; the night in Shanghai was the best night of his life, not just because he killed a slayer, but because he had his whole family to revel in the chaos with; saying it right here, right now, screwing being on Team Angel or Team Spike, I am firmly in TEAM GIVE SPIKE A FAMILY

- I love how in the entire season, there was only one Buffy/Spike kiss and it was a chaste one at that; I love how Spike’s development was one from conditional love (say you love me and I’ll spike Dru, say you love me or I’ll get a buffybot who HAS to love me) to unconditional love (I know you don’t love me and you won’t ever love me, but that’s okay). I think it was important that Spike not get “rewarded” for slowly changing sides

- also the buffybot, I thought it was going to be a terrible, awkward episode but it ended up being one of my favorites in the season; i mean, it was still awkward in spots (as buffy said, “gross and obscene”) but the buffybot was just too plain funny for the awkwardness to stick long; the bits where the buffybot asks Anya about her money and starts listing off insults about Angel had me bursting out in laughter; especially the Angel insults because I could just imagine with Spike and a pad of paper in his crypt, scrawling them down like, “YEAH. AND HIS HAIR. GRANDSIRE HAS STUPID, SPIKY HAIR”

- so... with Buffy (temporarily) gone, is Spike just going to hang around Sunnydale? he’s the main vamp killer, so is he going to be the vampire slayer in order to help protect Dawn (aka Buffy’s legacy)? will he and Dawn hang out because they’re still bros and they both miss Buffy and don’t have any other family? I JUST WANT SPIKE AND DAWN TO BE BROS LIKE SPIKE AND JOYCE WERE BROS. THEY CAN GO WATCH EPISODES OF PASSION TOGETHER AND LAUGH AND CRY AND BOND. THIS IS ALL I WANT FROM SEASON 6, JOSS. IT’S ALL I WANT.

On miscellaneousness...

- Anya is officially my favorite character on Buffy after Spike. When I whole bunch of rubble fell on her at the end of the Gift I temporarily stopped breathing because I was just like “NOT ANYA. SHE CANNOT DIE. NO, NOT ANYA. NO.”

- Joel Grey as a demon, yay emcee from Cabaret

- before I started watching Buffy, I, like the buffybot, also thought Giles’ name was pronounced with a hard-G

- so... with Giles still alive, I’m starting to get pleasantly confused. At the beginning of season three, I posted this list of stuff I got pre-spoilered for before I started watching the show. But now I’m starting to wonder if Giles actually dies. Because I thought I remembered something about him dying in season five, or like stuff about a dying scene... except now I’m thinking that the “dying scene” was actually talking about a “dying” scene. Like dying but not ACTUALLY dead. Because I think it was the one that happens at the end of the season with him impaled... which would mean Giles doesn’t die. I think I might’ve gotten a schroedinger spoiler

Angel - Season 2

On the Darla arc...

I thought I would hate this arc, and I half-did. I hated the whole start of it with Darla in his dreams and Angel distancing himself from his crew via restlessness/extensive sleeping. I loved everything after they ended up meeting in real life, from her coming to grips with her humanity to becoming a vampire again with a bit confusion, to her slipping fully back down the darkside. It helped that Dru was there. I was starting to think that Dru would only ever appear in flashbacks again. I love Dru

On the post-Darla arc...

I really kind of hated this arc. I get what the show was trying to do, showing Wesley, Gunn, and Cordelia coming into their own WITHOUT Angel (among other things), but the Angel episodes with just Angel were so borrrrrrrring. (With the exception of the Angel/Lorne episode. That was awesome. Lorne in general is awesome. He’s my favorite Angel character after Cordelia.) They’d show W/G/C fighting a fire-breathing monster or solving a murder mystery clue style for 5 minutes and it was awful because I’m like “no, stop cutting back to Angel, THAT’S the show I want to be watching right now.” And because of the short screen time, I felt there was less W/G/C teamship than there was Wesley and Gunn becoming closer bros with Cordelia getting shafted. Cordelia, I felt, got shafted a lot in this season with the except of the finale, which speaking of...

On the Pylea finale...

OH MY GOD I LOVED THESE EPISODES SO MUCH. Like they were definitely silly in spots but I LOVE silly and the whole off-world aspect reminded me of Stargate in all the best ways. I want to print these episodes off somewhere and frame them. (NUMFAR! DO THE DANCE OF JOY!). And Cordelia got so much focus that I actually got pretty dang worried towards the end that these would be her send off episodes, that she’d choose to or be forced to stay behind and be princess of a demon dimension. (Which would’ve been an awesome send off, ngl.) If Angel ends up moving in a direction more like that, I’m going to be super stoked because while a lot of this season was objectively “good”, it didn’t pull me into watching it like Buffy season 5 did.

Also the finale made me realize, just how much I want to see more of happy!Angel. His whole bits with the sunlight and the mirrors were puppy-endearing, comedy gold (”There’s some branches over in that patch of sun. I’ll get ‘em!”). :D 

On Lorne...

Lorne is my perfect man. He loves music, he’s at inner peace with himself and helps the inner peace of others, and his wardrobe is fabulous. The fakeout with his death was terrible... and then awesome as soon as his eyes popped back open. You guys have no idea how scared I was in the Pylea finale, that I might’ve been about to lose BOTH of my favorite characters.

Which, by the way, I’m starting to think that’s one of the reasons why I don’t love season 3 of Buffy quite the way that others do. Spike and Cordelia are my two favorite characters; Spike wasn’t in season 3 and Cordelia got largely shafted after Xander broke up with her.

On Lindsey...

He’s a bro. I’m hoping we see more of him... but also not because he seems to be in a good place and if he pops up again, he probably won’t be in a good place anymore.

On what I hope for going into Season 3...

- more team bonding

- more team bonding

- more team bonding

- Cordelia being awesome

- more Cordelia/Angel friendship moments because theirs is a beautiful friendship

- more team bonding

#buffy the vampire slayer #buffy meta #btvs #btvs meta #///// #clacks from theclacks

[ofgunsandlipstick]

✩ (thenewfist)

@thenewfist​ || ✩ || accepting

Disagreements:

Who is more likely to raise their voice? Probably Peggy, tbhWho threatens to leave but never actually does? Neither. Not a threat taken lightly. Ever.Who actually keeps their word and leaves? I could see Bucky leaving if Peggy made him.Who trashes the house? Peggy’s been known to throw things at walls but nothing more than that and not when she’s mad at him.Do either of them get physical? With each other? Absolutely not.How often do they argue/disagree? A LOT, but mostly good-naturedly.Who is the first to apologise? Bucky. Peggy’s a stubborn little jerk and hates apologizing.

Sex:

Who is on top? Depends, but Peggy will always ride him if he asks.Who is on the bottom? Again, it depends.Who has the strangest desires? Bucky drives the experiments in bed.Any kinks? He likes to tie her up every now and again when she lets him.Who’s dominant in bed? Honestly, Peggy more.Is head ever in the equation? Always.If so, who is better at performing it? Bucky, though Peggy is no slouch.Ever had sex in public? Not strictly, but it’s not like they haven’t snuck off to dark corners to get frisky.Who moans the most? Peggy.Who leaves the most marks? Peggy.Who screams the loudest? Peggy.Who is the more experienced of the two? I think they’re honestly on a pretty level field.Do they ‘fuck’ or ‘make love’? Depends on the day.Rough or soft? Again, depends on the day.How long do they usually last? Sometimes it’s a marathon, sometimes it’s a sprint. It all comes down to how much time they have available.Is protection used? NOT AS OFTEN AS THEY SHOULD. Well, Peggy’s on the pill at least.Does it ever get boring? Yes, but only in that fond, familiar way, not actually BORING.Where is the strangest place they’d have sex? 100% a temporarily empty medical tent.

Family:

Do your muses plan on having children/or have children? Not exactly.If so, how many children do your muses want/have? Bucky likely wants more than Peggy, but she’s willing to negotiate.Who is the favorite parent? Probably Bucky, but the kids love Peggy too.Who is the authoritative parent? Peggy.Who is more likely to allow the children to have a day off school? Honestly, Peggy.Who lets the children indulge in sweets and junk food when the other isn’t around? Bucky.Who turns up to extra curricular activities to support their children? Bucky more than Peggy, but only because he has more free time than her. It’s a special treat when Mum gets to show up.Who goes to parent teacher interviews? Bucky, but Peggy always tries to get there too.Who changes the diapers? Bucky because she 100% made him promise to the first time she got pregnant.Who gets up in the middle of the night to feed the baby? A toss up really, depending on the night. Sometimes Bucky’s already up because he can’t sleep, so he lets Peggy keep sleeping even if it’s her turn.Who spends the most time with the children? Bucky, but again, more free time.Who packs their lunch boxes? BUCKY. And he leaves them little notes.Who gives their children ‘the talk’? Peggy because she is so matter of fact.Who cleans up after the kids? Both until they’re old enough to clean up after themselves.Who worries the most? PEGGY.Who are the children more likely to learn their first swear word from? Peggy, muttering under her breath louder than she thought.

Affection:

Who likes to cuddle? bothWho is the little spoon? Depends on the day.Who gets naughty in the most inappropriate of places? Damn it, Peggy.Who struggles to keep their hands to themself?  Bucky, likely, and no one blames him.How long can they cuddle until one becomes uncomfortable? FOREVER.Who gives the most kisses? Peggy.What is their favourite non-sexual activity? Reading together- Peggy reads to him.Where is their favourite place to cuddle? Bed, but the sofa will do in a pinch.Who is more likely to playfully grope the other?  Bucky on a good day.How often do they get time to themselves? Not as often as they’d like but they do prioritize each other.

Sleeping:

Who snores? Peggy.If both do, who snores the loudest? Peggy snores quietly.Do they share a bed or sleep separately? SHARE A BED.If they sleep together, do they cozy up together or lay far apart? They’re literally like one person.Who talks in their sleep? Bucky and sometimes it breaks Peggy’s heart.What do they wear to bed? Bucky wears sweats and a tank top, Peggy wears his shirt and maybe sweats if it’s cold.Are either of your muses insomniacs? Bucky.Can sleeping pills be found by the bedside? No, but they can be found in the medicine cabinent just in case.Do they wrap their limbs around each other or just lay side by side? All wrapped up in one giant knot.Who wakes up with bed hair? Bucky and Peggy thinks it’s adorable.Who wakes up first? Bucky.Who prepares breakfast in bed for the other? Bucky.What is their favourite sleeping position? Him curled around her, Peggy holding his arm close to her chest. Or Bucky on his back with Peggy’s leg flung over his legs and her arm across his chest if she falls asleep listening to his heartbeat.Who hogs the sheets? Peggy.Do they set an alarm each night? Yes, but they hate it.Can a television be found in their bedroom? No.Who has nightmares? Bucky more than Peggy, but both.Who has ridiculous dreams? Neither honestly.Who sprawls out and takes up most of the bed? Peggy is a starfish.Who makes the bed? Peggy when she has time.What time is bed time? Fairly early, if they can sleep.Any routines/rituals before bed? Reading a chapter of Harry Potter.Who’s the grumpiest when they wake up? This is a mystery no one wants to witness to be able to solve.

Work:

Who is the busiest? Peggy.Who rakes in the highest income? Peggy.Are any of your muses unemployed? Bucky sort of, but he slowly returns to work.Who takes the most sick days? They don’t tend to stay home if they can help it. Who is more likely to turn up late to work? Peggy because Bucky has distracted her.Who sucks up to their boss? Well, Peggy is Bucky’s boss.What are their jobs? Peggy is the director, Bucky is technically a contractor.Who stresses the most? Peggy.Do your muses enjoy or despise their careers/occupations? They mostly enjoy them.Are your muses financially stable? Yes.

Home:

Who does the washing? It’s a joint task that almost never gets done.Who takes out the trash? Bucky more often than not.Who does the ironing? They avoid this.Who does the cooking? Bucky more than Peggy.Who is more likely to burn the house down just trying? Peggy Carter can boil water and that’s about it.Who is messier? Peggy.Who leaves the toilet roll empty? ...Peggy, the jerk.Who leaves their dirty clothes on the floor? They’re good about hampers.Who forgets to flush the toilet? No one.Who is the prankster around the house? Peggy.Who loses the car keys when it comes time to go somewhere? I’m not sure they have a car.Who mows the lawn? They live in an apartment.Who answers the telephone? Peggy, to be safe in case he gets upset.Who does the vacuuming? Bucky as a surprise while Peggy’s at work.Who does the groceries? They often go together when they’re off.Who takes the longest to shower? Peggy.Who spends the most time in the bathroom? Definitely Peggy. That makeup routine is not short. Though she leaves the door open.

Miscellaneous:

Is money a problem? Not even a little. How many cars do they own? They’re thinking about buying one.Do they own their home or do they rent? Technically they own it, but half the cost was a gift from Howard (that they don’t know about)Do they live near the coast or deep in the countryside? In the city, but they like to escape to the country.Do they live in the city or in the country? The city for sure.Do they enjoy their surroundings? For the most part. New York can sometimes still be overwhelming for Bucky on days.What’s their song? “Put Your Head On My Shoulder”- It came on the radio and was the first song they ever danced to.What do they do when they’re away from each other? Peggy works too much; she doesn’t like the way the apartment feels empty when he’s gone. Bucky is more used to her being away, so he will take care of the place or read or watch tv.Where did they first meet? During the war, as the 107th got ready to ship out.How did they first meet? Wandered into the same bar. What happened that night is still up for debate.Who spends the most money when out shopping? Bucky. Peggy is on a MISSION when she shops, but will spend more to get exactly what she wants.Who’s more likely to flash their assets? Peggy and we all know it.Who finds it amusing when the other trips over? Peggy because she’s the biggest jerk.Any mental issues? Well, I mean, it’s Bucky and he WAS a brainwashed Russian assassin so... But also Peggy has issues letting her guard down at all.Who’s terrified of bugs? Peggy.Who kills the spiders around the house? It better be Bucky because it sure as SHIT ain’t Peggy.Their favourite place? Bed. Nothing bad happens in bed.Who pays the bills? Peggy’s the one to sit down and write the checks.Do they have any fears for their future? Only everything. But especially kids.Who’s more likely to surprise the other with a fancy dinner? Bucky for sure.Who uses up all of the hot water? Bucky more than Peggy.Who’s the tallest? Bucky’s taller as long as her heels aren’t too high.Who’s more likely to just randomly hop into the shower with the other? Bucky, but only because Peggy tries not to surprise him if she can help it.Who wanders around in their underwear? THEY BOTH DO. PUT YOUR DAMN CLOTHES ON.Who sings the loudest when singing along to the radio? peggy but only if she thinks no one is listening.What do they tease each other about? Anything and everything, but especially Bucky’s fascination with her hair.Who is more likely to cringe at the other’s fashion sense at times? I mean, there are times Peggy’s asked Bucky not to wear jeans.Do they have mutual friends? Yes.Who crushed first? Definitely Bucky.Any alcohol or substance related problems? They try to be cognizant because they both know they could easily start self-medicating instead of dealing with their very real problems.Who is more likely to stumble home, drunk, at 3am? Peggy but not often at all.Who swears the most? Peggy’s got the mouth of a sailor

#Anonymous

[cathkaesque]

I remember reading a very interesting article co-authored by Podemos and the Working Families Party shortly after the US election on a municipal strategy to turn cities into bases of resistance to Trump. I’ve been think about what a similar strategy in the UK to resist austerity measures. These are essentially notes at the moment. If local government budget cuts are something that interest you, it’s under the cut.

- The UK is an incredibly centralised state. Local government is largely powerless, having been progressively turned into an arm of the welfare state centrally funded by the government over the course of the social democratic period (though not completely powerless - restrictions on councillors themselves have been loosened as it’s become clear councils remain a safe spot for capitalism). The aim of Osbourne’s reforms is to abolish the subsidy paid to local government (the Revenue Support Grant) and replace it with new powers to raise business rates and council tax. The revenue available to a local council therefore become entirely based on its ability to attract and grow businesses (which richer councils will always be able to do better as they can afford lower rates than poorer councils). The result, according to one local government expert, is that the council is transformed from “a mini-welfare state into a local economic growth agency.” We have a situation where the implementation of political decisions made in the centre are to be implemented by local authorities as a means to institutionalise austerity, as this excellent article explains. 

- What we can derive from this is that the Labour strategy (generous term for it) for resisting these cuts will not work. Being very sorry you’re having to implement these measures whilst making it clear that the Tory central government is responsible, so you all better vote Labour in 2020, won’t be enough. There will be nothing left by 2020. The libraries will have closed, the council houses sold, and the services locked into 30 year contracts with Serco and Veolia. Stopping austerity will require a confrontation between local and central government. An alternative strategy involves the drafting of a legal no cuts people’s budget based on the reserves and borrowing powers available to councils as outlined in this article. Councils can legally do this, despite the excuses of Labour councilors. Such budgets have been drafted in a number of cities and while none have been adopted, all have been declared legal by council officers (my favourite example is the Sheffield one - councilors told us that we couldn’t possibly use funds from the PFI reserve or bring Veolia bin collection back in house (which would have actually saved £10m according to GMB) to stop the cuts, but have since done both of these things in order to plug a pensions deficit). This would act as a minimum programme and be sufficient to stop the cuts temporarily in order to build a political campaign to win back the funding that has been cut over the last 6 years. As well as preventing further cuts to public services, it would be a political statement that the council intends to fight to defend public services rather than obediently passing on cuts. For that message to have the best effect, multiple cities would have to take this approach. I think both Bristol and Manchester could be potential bases for this approach given large protests around recent cuts budgets.

- Alongside this, the drafting of a needs budget designed to meet the needs of the city, not the centrally dictated budget. How much would it cost to provide every council worker with a living wage? How much would it cost to launch a jobs programme to provide work for the unemployed? How much would it cost to provide the start-up capital for a renewable energy cooperative to provide clean, collectively controlled power for the city? What kind of city do we want to live in? These are in essence transitional demands - these would almost certainly be deficit budgets (which are illegal, although the penalties for the councilors passing them are very small) and the funding for these proposed programmes would have to come from central government and from a new economic set up based on a nationalised banking system. The citizen assembly based approach Barcelona en Comu took to form their programme could be used to draft these budgets.

- The passage of deficit budgets is illegal and would be a pretext for central government to take over city councils. But then it becomes a case of the democratic legitimacy of an unelected central government versus elected councils in several large cities who spent the last year have been building political support for their programme. It becomes a question of ‘who runs the country?’ which could only properly be resolved through an election in which the left would be well placed. 

This is basically TUSC’s political programme. There are advantages:

- It doesn’t just build an electoral base to remove the Tories from power, but also begins to build the political form of what would come after neoliberalism. Venezuela’s approach of communal councils based in the barrios acting as a means to redistribute the profits from the country’s nationalised oil supply partly grew out of organisations formed to fight the 2002 coup. The citizens’ assemblies in this strategy could grow into similar organisations. 

But there a lot of drawbacks:

- This is a very high risk strategy for councils, essentially asking them to go all out to defend public services, leaving them with little wiggle room for dire emergencies and taking an approach which aims to break the law in a manner similar to the rate cap rebellion. However, I personally really can’t see any other way to stop these cuts. 

- Where are the workers in this? As Clive Heemskerk (TUSC national election agent) states, potential “still exists for combative local councils to become a catalyst for a new movement of working class resistance - were the to be combative local councillors.” This reveals a big weakness of this strategy. The protagonists in this fight are local government councilors and their party, hardly a hotbed of radicalism, with workers playing a somewhat passive role in providing an electoral base for said party, participating in the structures set up by that council/party, and mobilising to defend that council/party. Heemskerk notes the capacity of working class resistance to win more funds for local government with the anti-poll tax campaign, which forced Major to inject £4.3 billion into local government in order to replace the poll tax. But Heemskerk notes himself that only a very small number councillors and other representatives were supportive of the movement and were certainly not the protagonists of the movement. It is also a highly localised approach which is hard to generalise. A better strategy would be a unionisation drive targeting low wage workers in a similar manner to the Fight for $15 movement which the Bakers’ Union is trying to get going with the £10 Now campaign. The powerlessness of local government could almost be an asset - if a council voted to support the campaign, it would have to rely on trade unions themselves to enforce the wage. Both strategies could be carried out though.

- Which political vehicle could carry this out? Although the (Tory led, oddly) Local Government Association has been increasingly vocal against these cuts (with the leader of the LGA, who is head of Surrey council, threatening a 15% rise in council tax as a means to win more funding from central government), most councillors have been obediently implementing the cuts. John McDonnell was supportive of this strategy back in 2011, but since becoming Shadow Chancellor has been very unsupportive, and Labour under Corbyn has made it an expellable offense for councillors to take this path. Labour councillors are also one of the most Blairite sections of the party and are thus highly unlikely to go along with this strategy (or want to oppose austerity full stop). Even if Labour did adopt such a strategy nationally, it would probably go in a similar way to the Rate Cap Rebellion of the 80s with individual councils breaking rank, but this time without the hard-left holdouts like Liverpool and Lambeth. While the anti-austerity movement has entered the Labour Party en masse, the working class base of the party remains completely hollowed out, as it has been since the 90s. The popular support of local councils has also been hollowed out for similar reasons (why bother voting in council elections when it makes zero difference which party is in power?). I can’t see a Labour council, often filled with very right wing councillors who have been preceding over this process for decades, who lack the necessary base in the working class, being able to lead this campaign. There aren’t any councils outside Southampton (which has 3 TUSC councillors) which have any left councillors who would be prepared to carry out this strategy. Regardless of the new ‘anti-austerity’ perspective adopted by Corbyn’s Labour, a new working class political party unconnected to existing councillors which aims to “reclaim the city” would be needed to carry out this strategy. In order to become that party, TUSC must become a membership organisation, the genuine beginnings of a new working class party, as opposed to a coalition of left sects.

- It will never, ever happen and probably wouldn’t work if it did.

#sounds social democratic but okay #socialism #council cuts

[newyorktheater]

On his 90th birthday, Stephen Sondheim sang Happy Birthday to Andrew Lloyd Webber…while washing his hands for 20 seconds in his bathroom sink — a playful gesture that is an instantly iconic moment for this new era.

It was Andrew Lloyd Webber’s birthday as well; he turned 72, and the younger composer had more straightforwardly wished Sondheim a happy birthday from his piano room.

They both did this live on the one-night only resurrected Rosie O’Donnell Show (watch here), a fundraiser for The Actors Fund that lasted three and a half hours on Sunday night and featured dozens of Broadway stars, performing from their home via home cam. It was all a reflection of an emerging aesthetic in theater, in the face of the stay-at-home mandate to curb the spread of the coronavirus. Call it the theatrical equivalent of home cooking.

Some of Rosie’s guests had messages meant to inspire. “We lived through a Plague before,” Judith Light said, referring to AIDS. “We were together then, and we’ll be together now.” Click on the photographs of other guests for the captions.

Aaron Tveit

Adrienne Warren in her bathtub

Audra McDonald and Will Swenson “We have shelter, we have each other, and that’s all we know,” she said and then sang “Smile” while he played guitar.

Ben Platt

“Many people in the entertainment community are living on the edge ,” said Brian Stokes Mitchell, , chair of The Actors Fund , which is trying to help — and why he’s hoping we’ll all contribute.

Chita Rivera

Patti LuPone singing “Smile”

Alan Menken

Barry Manilow

Bernadette Peters

Bernadette Peters showing off her life ask

Billy Porter

Rose with Cynthia Errico

Darren Criss singing Being Alive

Gloria Estefan

Harvey Fierstein

Jordan Fisher with his pianist neighbor

Kelly O’Hara

Kristin Chenoweth

Laura Benanti told Rosie she’s working on a project with #FoodCorps to feed schoolkids who would normally get free school lunches. Doing this kind of work, she says, is the way to keep her stress at bay.

Lauren Patton from Jagged Little Pill, wearing a t-shirt with the title of her show-stopping song from the show, “You Oughta Know”

Lea Salonga

Matthew Broderick and Sarah Jessica Parker

Neil Patrick Harris with his kids

Rob McClure

Titus Burgess, Rosie’s first guest

Sondheim Birthday Celebrations

…Stephen Sondheim, 89, nine-time Tony-winning composer, listening in the studio to a recording of the Broadway revival cast album of Sunday in the Park with George , 2019

#Sondheimat90 rewatching the videos of some terrific performances of his songs, several from his 80th birthday concerts, and rereading some of his best lyrics. “Everybody rise!” Stephen Sondheim’s greatest roles and the actors who played them

New Theater and the Emerging Pandemic Aesthetic

Perry Yung with his silent son in La MaMa’s Downtown Variety #1

At home, Lin-Manuel Miranda singing from Hamilton live for The Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon

The Rosie O’Donnell Show was meant to be a one-time affair. So was 24 Hour Plays’ “Viral Monologues” — 20 scripted monologues by established playwrights for well-known performers. Similar “home cooking” hybrid theater shows have sprouted up in the last few days aiming to be regular series — including the twice daily Stars in the House, with hosts with hosts Seth Rudetsky and James Wesley, and the daily National Yiddish Theater’s Folksbiene Live, as well as La Mama’s weekly Downtown Variety — the first of which I reviewed, Downtown Variety #1,

There are also plays that had been slated for the stage that are experimenting with online runs, some free, some charging admission. Launching today (March 23) are Ren Dara Santiago’s “The Siblings Play” at Rattlestick Playwright Theater in New York, and Lauren Gunderson’s “I and You” from the Hampstead Theater in the UK. There will be more such online runs, given Actors’ Equity’s new, temporary contracts that allow select producers to record and then release performances online to ticket buyers. (The agreements do not apply to Broadway, which already include rules for “media capture.”)

For details on these and other online theater, including a roundup of theater-oriented online streaming services and Broadway fare on Amazon Prime and Netflix, check out my post: Where To Get Your Theater Fix Online, Old Favorites and New Experiments (Plus Lin-Manuel Miranda & Joshua Henry) #DontScreamLiveStream

  Time Out for Humor, Uplift, and Advice

THINGS YOU CAN DO IN QUARANTINE:

– Late nights – Quick bites – Party games – Deep talks – Long walks – Telephone calls – Thoughts shared – Souls bared – Private names – All those photos up on the walls

— Jorge Molina (@colormejorge) March 16, 2020

Advice for surviving isolation from @NatanSharansky, in solitary confinement in a Soviet prison for 9 yrs: 1 Remind yourself “This is a kind of war in which each of us is a soldier” 2 Don’t depend on outside events. “Create your own world” e.g. learn a language 3 Laugh and sing

— New York Theater (@NewYorkTheater) March 22, 2020

Artist and Theater Support

The Broadway League and the 14 Broadway unions hammered out an “emergency relief” agreement that, for a few weeks anyway, will support the Broadway cast and crew now without employment, and continue their health insurance.

Financial Fallout of the Coronavirus New York’s performing-arts scene has taken hits before—after 9/11, during the recession that began in 2007, after Hurricane Sandy—but its elimination for an indefinite period of time is unprecedented….“All theatre people, except the ones who have institutional jobs—we’re gig people,” Daniel Goldstein, co-writer of “Unknown Soldier” whose day job, as an associate director on the Broadway show “Come From Away” is also now gone, said. “We’re no different than a handyman. When the theatres closed we were literally all unemployed. Everyone I know is unemployed.”

A little tiny bit of good news? https://t.co/BIBim1GQ4Z

— Helen Shaw (@Helen_E_Shaw) March 20, 2020

“The New York Community Trust has announced that it’s administering the NYC COVID-19 Response and Impact Fund, a massive system of grants and interest-free loans from what we hope is a bottomless bucket of money. A consortium of more than a dozen funders — including the Andrew W. Mellon Foundation, Bloomberg Philanthropies, the Doris Duke Charitable Foundation, the Ford Foundation, and the Rockefeller Brothers Fund — have pooled around $75 million in funds to relieve social services, arts, and cultural institutions.”

From the COVID-19 Fund’s page:

“Your organization is eligible to apply for a loan if you:

Are a 501(c)3 nonprofit organization Are based in New York City Have annual non-governmental revenue of $20 million or less Receive New York City or New York State government funding Have a track record of delivering effective programs and services equitably for New York resident”

  Entertainment industry workers who are facing financial hardships due to coronavirus shutdowns may be able to get some help from a new $100 million fund set up by @netflix. https://t.co/QzQhADLqxM

— New York Theater (@NewYorkTheater) March 20, 2020

In @Variety, @RepAdamSchiff suggests how Congress can change the way unemployment insurance is calculate, to benefit freelance entertainment workers. https://t.co/8kf0wcLQnz pic.twitter.com/f74OzOoROC

— New York Theater (@NewYorkTheater) March 20, 2020

https://t.co/lIWm9YNYSi pic.twitter.com/YG0gRq2Bt5

— Patti LuPone (@PattiLuPone) March 18, 2020

The Coalition of Broadway Unions and Guilds (#COBUG) — which includes 13 unions, including @ActorsEquity, @SDCWeb, @Local_802_AFM. @IATSE (including 6 locals) — “calls on New York City and State to provide emergency assistance to arts workers impacted by #COVID19 “

— New York Theater (@NewYorkTheater) March 18, 2020

5 Ways to Help Theatres and Artists During the COVID-19 Crisis

“The role that nearly 100,000 arts workers play [in NYC] cannot be overstated.”

— New York Theater (@NewYorkTheater) March 18, 2020

  Grim Coronavirus News

New York has now become the epicenter of the coronavirus in the United States, as the Atlantic Magazine coronavirus tracker makes clear. New York State has about half of all the cases in the U.S., and the vast majority of the cases in the state are centers in the New York City region.

Coronavirus in N.Y.C.: Region Is Now an Epicenter of the Pandemic “Three weeks after its first coronavirus infection was discovered, the New York City region reached an alarming milestone on Sunday: It now accounts for roughly 5 percent of the world’s confirmed cases, making it an epicenter of the pandemic and increasing pressure on officials to take more drastic measures….As of 8 p.m. on Sunday, all nonessential businesses were ordered closed… Residents were told to stay inside except for necessities like food, medicine and short bouts of exercise.”

This is the best and clearest explanation of why people need to stay at home you could ever wish to see pic.twitter.com/49MgadlctI

— Alan White (@aljwhite) March 22, 2020

When Will Broadway Reopen?

Given the exponential spread of the coronavirus, and the ever-more drastic measures promised to try to curb it, the initial goal of reopening Broadway on April 12th is looking increasingly unrealistic.

Broadway isn’t coming back until the summer — at best — producers speculate to Michael Riedel, & @TheTonyAwards not until Fall. But Broadway WILL come back. https://t.co/bBpKAD7j2J pic.twitter.com/y2meUhNxjV

— New York Theater (@NewYorkTheater) March 20, 2020

Cancellations

Since the shut-down of Broadway on March 12th and of all New York City theaters on March 15th, there has been such a steady stream of news reports, e-mails and Tweets announcing cancellations, that it’s easier to point to what is actually staying open or still scheduled – nothing, really, except what’s happening online.

But several cancellations in particular sting.

Show Score, the critic aggregation site that had already cut back, is shutting down — they hope temporarily.

Laurie Metcalf of Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf

Mark Addy of “Hangmen,” which will not open on Broadway

  On the day of the news of the “emergency relief” agreement guaranteeing payment for those working on scheduled Broadway shows, both “Hangmen” and “Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf,”  shows that had been scheduled to open this season, announced that they would not return when Broadway resumes.

—

Announcing our very happy news 🙂 pic.twitter.com/bLP8t96X4V

— Ruthie Ann Miles (@RuthieAnnMiles) March 21, 2020

Rest in Peace

Gerald Freedman, 92, renowned director, artistic director, and educator whose students included Robin Williams and Mandy Patinkin, was a 21-time Broadway veteran, beginning as a directorial assistant to Jerome Robbins on the original Broadway production of “West Side Story.”  Among the dozens of shows he directed Off Broadway was the original production of the musical “Hair” at the Public Theater. He went on to become for 21 years the dean of the School of Drama at the University of North Carolina School of the Arts, which named its theater after him.

Gayle Austin, KathleenChalfant, and Julia Miles at the founding of WP Theater

Julia Miles, 90, founded the Women’s Project Theater in 1978, to address the conspicuous underrepresentation of women artists working in the American theater. She also founded the League of Professional Theatre Women.

Remembering our founder, Julia Miles

Sondheim in the Bathroom at Rosie’s Party! Support for Artists. When Will Broadway Reopen? #Stageworthy News of the Week On his 90th birthday, Stephen Sondheim sang Happy Birthday to Andrew Lloyd Webber...while washing his hands for 20 seconds in his bathroom sink -- 

#Artist and Theater Support #Cancellations #Emerging Pandemic Aesthetic #Florence Henderson RIP #RIP Gerald Freedman #The Rosie O&039;Donnell Show

[biofunmy]

Your Uber Driver Is ‘Retired’? You Shouldn’t Be Surprised

Dave Zarrow, who lives in Reston, Va., figures he spends about 20 hours a week in his 2017 Camry driving for Uber, the ride-hailing company.

A former small business owner who segued into teaching, he and his wife have left their full-time jobs and could comfortably retire. Even without the $15 to $20 an hour he earns driving, “we would have been O.K.,” he said.

But at 68, “I get antsy just sitting around,” Mr. Zarrow explained. He likes the flexibility of this nontraditional job — no benefits and unpredictable income, but the ability to set his own hours — and his conversations with riders.

Besides, his earnings help pay for visits to far-flung children and grandchildren and other extras. “It’s allowed us to continue the same lifestyle we had before we retired,” he said, without eroding their savings.

He is not the kind of older worker in a nontraditional job that economists worry about.

They worry about people like Gary Ellenbogen, 64, who has spent three years driving for rival Lyft. Once a self-employed business coach and ski instructor, Mr. Ellenbogen worked in corporate sales for several years, then got laid off in his 50s.

He has struggled to find steadier work ever since. “Nobody’s interested in someone my age,” he said.

Despite spending 40 to 60 hours a week picking up riders in his 2015 Subaru Forester, Mr. Ellenbogen is barely surviving financially. He had to give up his apartment and move into his mother’s condo in Verona, N.J. He relies on Medicaid for health care.

“It’s something I’m accepting because I’m in need of money,” he said of his Lyft gig. “I’m capable of better things, but this is what’s available to me.”

Economists debate how to define this kind of employment, often categorized as “nontraditional jobs” or “alternative work arrangements,” and how to calculate the proportion of the older work force engaged in it.

Popularly seen as the province of the young, it now provides work for a growing number of people in their 50s, 60s and beyond.

The federal Bureau of Labor Statistics includes independent contractors (who may be self-employed but well compensated) and estimates that 11.4 percent of those aged 50 to 62 have nontraditional jobs. The Government Accountability Office, using an even broader definition including part-timers, says the figure is 31.2 percent.

Among workers over 62, economists at The New School’s Retirement Equity Lab have found that 9 percent were in “on-call, temp, contract or gig jobs” in 2015; the researchers believe the percentage has grown since then.

In a just-published report, the Center for Retirement Research at Boston College put the number of nontraditional job holders at about 20 percent of 50- to 62-year-old workers, using data from the national Health and Retirement Study.

Their study defines nontraditional jobs as those that provide no health insurance or retirement benefits. “They’re probably low-paid,” said Alicia Munnell, director of the center. “Some have erratic schedules.”

According to the report, only about a quarter of 50-year-old workers stayed at a traditional job with benefits until age 62; some classified as early retirees may not have left their jobs voluntarily.

Are these nontraditional options bad jobs? It depends on how they’re used. Some nontraditional workers, for instance, can forgo benefits because their spouses have them.

“If people use them to tide themselves over after being laid off, it’s better than being unemployed,” Dr. Munnell said. “They could be a landing place, keeping people going until they find a new full-time job.”

Workers in that category, who use nontraditional jobs only sparingly, had 6 percent lower retirement income at age 62, the study found, than those who held onto traditional positions.

But “that’s not how they’re used,” Dr. Munnell pointed out. “It seems people are stuck in these jobs.”

The majority of those in nontraditional jobs at ages 50 to 62 rely on them for most of their employment, and their retirement income at 62 is 26 percent lower than that of employees holding traditional jobs. (Nontraditional jobholders have somewhat higher rates of depression, as well.)

Economists generally approve of people extending their work lives, but in most of these cases, “the jobs they’re taking aren’t the kind anyone would take because they’re interesting,” said Teresa Ghilarducci, director of The New School’s Retirement Equity Lab.

Nontraditional jobs include food service and retail, as well as gig jobs; among the fastest growing categories are janitorial work, and personal care and health aide positions. “They’re not easy on older bodies,” Dr. Ghilarducci pointed out. “They require a lot of physical stamina.”

Their prevalence may help explain why so many workers claim Social Security before reaching their full retirement ages, reducing their benefits. When work becomes intermittent and poorly paid, the predictability of a fixed monthly check with cost-of-living increases can feel irresistible.

Some nontraditional workers aged 50 to 62 lack a high school diploma, but people with college degrees are also entering this sector. “They’re the ones that had a good job, then had a hiccup — the recession, a job that moved away — and had the most to lose,” Dr. Ghilarducci said.

Mr. Ellenbogen, for instance, has a master’s degree in social psychology from the University of Vermont. After getting laid off from sales positions and finding a return to business coaching unprofitable, he became a commission-only sales rep for Home Depot, with no base salary or benefits.

The company let him go, he said, when retina surgery left him unable to drive for two months. After he recovered, the only work he could find was with Lyft, where about a quarter of drivers are over 50, the company reported last year.

Mr. Ellenbogen has searched for jobs on LinkedIn, on Indeed, in local newspapers. The New Start Career Network at Rutgers University has provided free weekly sessions with a coach.

Nothing has materialized, so Mr. Ellenbogen keeps driving, trying to delay claiming Social Security to maximize his benefits.

How to help support older workers whose precarious employment endangers their retirement? Several states have started IRA programs, but with no mandated employer contribution, it’s not clear how much difference they’ll make.

Broader national actions — including more affordable and accessible health care — would be more effective, Dr. Munnell said.

Dr. Ghilarducci and her colleagues have proposed “guaranteed retirement accounts” with professional management, required employer contributions and payouts over a lifetime.

Even if Washington takes action to shore up retirement security, however, relief may not come in time for Mr. Ellenbogen.

He happened to be at a sales meeting in the Pentagon on Sept. 11, 2001, an experience which left him uninjured but persuaded that “you must find ways to smile and enjoy today.”

But that can be difficult. Earlier this month, a driver went through a stop sign and did almost $6,000 in damage to Mr. Ellenbogen’s Subaru.

Though insurance will apparently cover the repair, his car has been in the shop for more than two weeks, temporarily leaving him with no way to earn a living.

Sahred From Source link Health

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#IFTTT #WordPress

[angrybelieverconnoisseur-blog]

West Burlington New York Cheap car insurance quotes zip 13482

"West Burlington New York Cheap car insurance quotes zip 13482

West Burlington New York Cheap car insurance quotes zip 13482

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Drink driving insurance?

I was convicted of drink driving last year. Just got my driving licence back. Does anybody know where I can get cheap car insurance, theres loads of companies that say they specialise in convicted driver insurance but some of the prices I have been quoted have been astronomical. 1000+, Ive tried all the comparison sites, is there any companies out there that specialise in providing insurance for convicted drink drivers?""

How much would it be to insure a 2nd gen. Dodge Ram 2500 with a Cummins Turbo diesel for a 16 year old boy?

Im looking for better gas mileage, and it appears the Cummins has better mpgs than its 5.9l counterpart. (dont be a smart *** and say no trucks get good fuel economy) But i would wonder if a diesel would yield higher insurance costs for someone my age rather than a regular gas engine.""

Age Of 16 to fill up a car insurance quote?

why car insurance agent put 16 on car insurance quote even you got your license when you were 18...?

How much would insurance cost on a dodge charger in nj?

How much would insurance cost on a dodge charger in nj?

Is it true that the affordable care act will double the cost of my health insurance to meet the ACA requiremen?

Double premiums and out of pocket cost my health insurance is not from healthcare.gov exchanges

""Im a 14 years experianced driver , going to reside in USA, Wi, soon ; how will be my Auto Insurance policy?""

Im a 32 years old male and I have been driving for past 14 years. Im going to move to USA , Wisconsin , I would like to know how will be my Auto Insurance Policy? Will I be considered as a new driver , Since I belive I would have to apply for an American Driving license?""

""I got a speeding ticket in Indiana, but I live in California?""

I plan on paying the ticket (Indiana court told me to send $138), but I want to know if I need to go to traffic school? If not, does a record go on my California license and my insurance would go up?""

Health insurance?

who knows of good health insurances that would be affordable and good and who cover pap smears practically im in search of one but cant find the right one i really need it asap someone help thank you!

Is it illegal to drive without auto insurance in Fla?

Someone told me that I absolutely need insurance on my car or I could face charges. Is this true?

Somebody help me find cheap car insurance in uk...........?

i am 20 year old foreign student in uk from 2 years....i am about to buy some cheap car with 1 ltr engine which is worth of 1000. but the biggest problem is for the 700-800 worth car they are asking me to pay 5000 insurance........... some body please help me find the cheaper insurance... can you advise me on what basis insurance is counted like age... address so that i can figure out from where to buy insurance.... some extra information:: i don't have any NCB first car I have very new licence in full time education. can afford max 150 per month please guys suggest me some cheap insurance provider....

Florida motorcycle insurance?

So I have a small 49 cc scooter that is street legal and I drive through the roads like everyone else. In Florida it's not necessary to have insurance on this small of an engine bike, so I don't. My question is, in the case of an accident that's NOT MY fault such as a car rear ends me at a traffic light or any other incident, can I still claim anything? Will the other persons insurance still fix or replace my bike? Will the other persons insurance cover me in any needed doctor visits?""

What is the cheapest insurance u can get with a cobalt ss because it is a super sports car?

i do not currently own it but if i find a super cheap quot so i can get it and i don't know much about insurance so can you explane why u have to have it and what it really pays for... if HyperGforce get in here i would really appreciate that because i love gm workers (my dad currently works there for 25 years and my grandpa also has worked there all his life so gm runs deep in my family.

Accident no insurance?

I was in a wreck today but it wasnt my fault my insurance is about a month late the other driver has insurance full coverage what is going to happen

If i pay more of a down payment on my insurance will i get a lower premium?

Cost for the car im looking at monthly is $398, they want a $401 down payment, if i pay $501 will it take it down?""

If you decided to stop paying for car insurance does the company have the right to charge you for?

the last month you had it even though it was 10 days before it was due that I canceled it?

What is the best health insurance and affordable in arizona?

for mom and a daughter

Will my car insurance cover me?

My car is in the shop. My boyfriend offered to lend me his car but he has no insurance. Will my car insurance cover me and his car in the event of an accident? I have full coverage on my car. I can't call tonight to find out and I need to know before I actually can call the insurance company. Thanks! Please don't answer if you do not know. 10 points to first best answer.

Most reliable auto insurance company?

How much would my monthly premium be for auto insurance? I'm male and 18, no accidents and responsible. I drive an old sedan, silver. I drive to work, to college, to the market and back home. No joy rides, no trips or visits. What auto insurance company is the best?""

What is a good looking and cheap running car for a 17 year old british man hoping to pass soon?

i would prefer a hatchback but dont actually mind lol...need it too look good, be cheap to run and cheap on insurance""

West Burlington New York Cheap car insurance quotes zip 13482

West Burlington New York Cheap car insurance quotes zip 13482

Fraudulent car insurance claim against me?

hi my problem in a nutshell is my vehicle was hit in the rear while it was parked, when i confronted the driver we had an argument and the police were called no offences were committed and the police left after me and the other driver exchanged names and addresses. A month or so later i received a claim for neck injuries to the driver and his 2 passengers for approximately 20,000 for an accident that he said i drove into the rear of him which was totally false, i have witnesses which include the police officer who attended to the fact that the other driver hit my parked unattended car, i have lost my no claims bonus and i applied for a job as a driver which i did not get because of this pending claim, my insurance company have tried to contact the other driver who has not answered for a number of months and when i spoke to my insurance company i was informed that the other parties insurance company does not have the full story i.e they have not been told that he hit my vehicle and i have witnesses to prove that i am at a loss because i have been told it can take 3 years for the claim to close if the other driver does not answer any of the correspondence he receives. any advice please""

""Can a licensed driver, drive my car without having insurance?""

#1. I am insured under my parents Allstate Auto Insurance. My boyfriend is a licensed driver but does not have car insurance. If he drives my car and something happened, would Allstate cover it? #2. In a previous state, we were given the option of adding him to the plan or not allowing him to drive any of our vehicles. We signed the agreement that he would not drive our vehicles. Now, in a different state, would that follow us? #3. If he were to get insurance, I was told, a driver can not get insurance unless their name is on the title? Any help is greatly appreciated!""

Insurance school in noth california?

Insurance school in noth california?

Can you drive a parent's car without insurance in NYC?

My dad has a car with insurance on it, but my name is not on it. Is it legal for me to drive the car? I live in New York City, and I'm not worried about the risk of insurance not covering damages because my name is not on the insurance. I'm responsible 18 year-old and my parents suggest that I just drive the car since putting my name with the insurance would cost a fortune extra. I just need to know if it is legal. Thanks!""

Classic car insurance?

i want cheap insurance so will buying a classic help that?

Car insurance for teen?

My dad says that by me getting my permit(haven't got yet) his insurance deductable will go from 200$ to 500$. I need help with finding a popular insurance company that has low-cost coverage for teenage drivers.

How much insurance would be if i bought a 1994 honda civic dx?

i am 18 and i plan on buying a car next year so i just wanted to know how much insurance would cost

How much insurance costs for Yamaha YZF-R125?

for 21 old male as a learner in uk ..

Can you get medical insurance on a motorcycle?

If I were to buy a bike could I get medical insurance on the bike that covered any injuries that I could get if I got hurt on the bike. Also how much do you think it would cost? Any web sites I could go too?

Do I sign the certificate of title when selling the car to the insurance company?

My vehicle was determined to be a total loss and I have decided to give up my car to the insurance company. They have asked me to send the certificate of title and the DMV form (Vehicle transfer and reassignment form). The odd thing is that the insurance company asked that I do not sign the title document, but asked that I sign the DMV form. Should I sign both documents, or just sign the DMV form (will that be enough to successfully transfer the vehicle?) What will happen if I end up signing the certificate of title, even when the insurance company told me not to??""

Accident with no insurance?

Hi I got in an accident in linconwood with out any insurance but the accident was his fault and there's no police report and now his car insurance company is during me b.c they said it was my fault. Can somebody please help me out here

Do I need motorcycle insurance to ride off a bike at the dealership?

I meant proof of insurance while the bike (motorcycle) is paid in cash in the city of Milwaukee, state of Wisconsin?""

How much money does drivers ed save on car insurance?

Is the amount saved by drivers ed a lot, meaning does drivers ed pay for itself by helping lower your insurance cost?""

Can I change my car insurance before the year is up?

I have found a cheaper quote but my insurance doesn't run out until next year

Got myself a little old ford fiesta 1100 i am over 25 learner driver which is the cheapest insurance firm.?

Got myself a little old ford fiesta 1100 i am over 25 learner driver which is the cheapest insurance firm.?

Where can i get cheap health insurance?

Where can i get cheap health insurance?

Question about state farm auto insurance?

My payment was due on the 1st, and now it's the fifth. I just paid it today through online banking. The bank says it may not be processed until tuesday, but i have to get to work before then. Am i fine, since it was technically paid today, or am I just f*cked?""

How much would car insurance cost for a 2008 Ferrari F430?

I meant around how much would it cost say if i was 18 how much would it cost?

2 questions on car insurance?

1) I'm looking to buy a car soon after I pass my driving test in 2 weeks. I'm 20, I'll be turning 21 in November. I seen that the insurance price for a 17-20 year old is around 2400 and the price for a 21-24 year old is around 2000. If I were to get insurance 2 months before my 21st birthday, would I be able to pay 2 monthly rates of the 17-20 year old price and then convert onto the 21-24 year old price? Or am I stuck with the 20 year old price for one year? 2) If I were to set the voluntary excess to a higher amount to get a lower premium, would I be able to change the voluntary excess when I renew my car insurance? Or is it possible to change it every month if I chose to pay monthly? Thanks.""

Can a 17 yr old get there own dental insurance?

Can a 17 yr old get there own dental insurance?

If Republicans do not act quickly to stop Democrats will tens of thousands of new cars be sold?

Republican members of Congress are trying to stop the cash for clunkers program . The program has been a great success and thousands of cars were sold already, depleting the supply and stimulating the economy with new tax revenue. Since supply has been brought down by these new sales the big 3 car companies will have to start making more cars putting thousands to work in the process. This in hand stimulates the entire economy. Republicans are trying everything in their power to make sure it does not pass again. Is there something fundamentally wrong with the Republican party? Why would they want to stop this effective program in a time of economic crisis?""

Car Insurance for 16 year old?

I'm thinking of getting an 04 Mazda Rx-8, like 40,000 miles on it, but I wanna know how much I'd have to pay to insure it. I heard you get a discount for having good grades(G.P.A 3.9) and taking drivers ed. Please give me an estimate.""

Does anyone know some cheap insurance companies for drivers who just passed?

UK only please :)xx

Car Insurance decrease or increase?

I'm purchasing a 2012 Toyota Aygo within the coming weeks but I cannot be quoted on the insurance as the 2012 registration plates have not yet come up on the database of the insurance company I would like to go with. I have had a quote for 'nearly' the exact car but a 2011 version. Does anybody have a rough idea if the insurance is likely to increase or decrease with it being a 2012 model? Thanks :)

Car insurance for young drivers?

I was wondering what insurers provide the most favourable quotes for an 18old male like myself? The cheapest car insurance quote I could get was 2262, on an independant insurance website. The comparison websites are useless, I just get results of 3000 or more. I am asking if I can get cheaper than this figure? or should I just selttle for 2262?""

West Burlington New York Cheap car insurance quotes zip 13482

West Burlington New York Cheap car insurance quotes zip 13482

Why isn't there an affordable Insurance with out a deductable?

I was raised on Insurance but now that I am an adult and moved away from my family I can't afford hospital visit or doctor visits or nothing. I look for insurance that I can afford but for the lowest deductible its to much and you have to pay the deductible first then pay the monthly payment. It just pisses me off that everything is so greedy!

Does anyone know about kit cars and insuring them?

I am a younger driver and was told my insurance wouldnt be as much if I was to buy a kit car. Anybody know about this?

Im 18 years old and just got a ford focus and i want to get liability insurance on it how much would it cost?

Im 18 years old and just got a ford focus and i want to get liability insurance on it how much would it cost?

Is insurance for a motorcycle alot?

I want to get a motorcycle because it is more convenient for me and its looks fun. But I heard insurance is alot? I am 19 I live in California and I have a drivers licensce. I am going to take the motorcycle class that I think is required. Will I get any discounts for any of these factors? Thank you guys

""Which is worse: increased taxes, or a high insurance premium?""

http://www.usatoday.com/money/industries/health/2009-09-15-insurance-costs_N.htm for some reason, I'd pay any tax to fund socialized medicine thrown my way rather than pay $13,375 a year for a family of four. and you'd be crazy not to yourself. and besides...the tax would never be 4,824, which is the average a single person pays per year.""

How much is cost of insurance of car driven by Indian driving licence holder in UK?

How much is cost of insurance of car driven by Indian driving licence holder in UK?

""How much would insurance cost for a 23 year old with a $1,500 car in florida?""

Assuming the car is fully paid for, how much would insurance cost on a rather cheap ($1,500) car in Florida for a 23 year old with a spotless record. If an exact amount is too hard to find, a ballpark estimate would help.""

What's the cheapest I can get car insurance for?

I'm 17 years old, and am looking to get my first car, something like an old Ford KA, Ford Fiesta or similar, you know the kinda cars I'm talking about. I am able to keep it in a secure residential car parking space. I'd prefer not to be told to just look around on price comparison websites , I've looked but the prices im being quoted are ranging from 3500 to 8000 and I'd like a rough idea on the cheapest I would be able to get it for, and tips as to how I can get it at a good value price?""

If you know about car insurance (10 points will be awarded )?

Hey, my older brother has a Honda HR-V 1.6 VTEC engine which is UK insurance group 9 and tax bracket F, I am looking at a Suzuki Swift Sport 1.6 engine, insurance group 9 and tax bracket E... my insurance is with my dads business who say i can have up to a 1.6, I learnt to drive in my brothers car but the insurance company are looking into whether or not i can have a Suzuki Swift Sport, it has no turbocharger, so what is the big deal 10 Points for best answer""

What will happen because my auto insurance lapsed 2 months in Virginia?

We accidentally let our car insurance lapse for 2 months in Virginia. We paid the insurance company to get coverage again. What should we do with VA DMV? What kind of fine should we expect? Should I contact them? I'm mainly concerned about avoiding a suspended license.

Insure the box car insurance? miles question?

hi ive recently done a quote with insure the box and i got my insurance to 1600 on 2006 corsa 998c engine fully comp, i understand they give you 6000 miles standard my question is if i go over 6000 miles i need to top up how much does that cost? 250miles ? 500miles? 1000 miles ? and so on ? anyone know thanks""

Can I let somone drive my car who doesn't have insurance? [Ontario]?

So the law says you can let somone drive your car if they have a license. If they get into an accident the charges are on my insurance. Make sure that if you are loaning your car to someone else that you first verify their license or you may be without a car for 7 days while it is in impound. Ref: http://find-a-driving-school.ca/10-ontar But law also states that if you are driving you must have insurance ... right? So for example... can I let my bro drive my car even though he has his G2 and is not insured. What are the consequences? Thanks!

How can i get cheaper insurance on my 1998 honda civic 1.5?

Every time i want to find a cheap insurance on my Honda civic 1.5 i get quotes starting from 4000, this is insanity, my car is worth not more than 600 and insurance is almost 10 times bigger. I am 20 years old.""

17 year old car insurance prices ?

im comparing cars on moneysupermarket because im 16 an need a heads up on insurances costs etc... but i compared a classis mini 1.0- annual: 6000 and Monthly: 650 also, 2007 vauxhall corsa 1.0- annual: 8000 Monthly: 852 and a 1993 Ford Fiesta 1.1- annual: 12000 Monthly: 1152 now i can sort of understand the price for the mini, due to its a small car with a small engine, but the corsa's like brand new? how can the insurance be sort of lowish. but why are they charging huge amounts for a fiesta that is older than me and is probably falling to piece's slowly ? im so confused :S can some one help me and please explain this i really want to be able to have a first car at 17 but at this rate i might be stuck on a motorcycle for a few years then maybe have enough money to afford a car :/""

Car insurance help please?

I'm living in Ireland and I'm hopefully getting a car next year. I'll be 17 or 18 when I get it and I'm just wondering about how much car insurance would be for me? I'd be just getting a car like a Honda civic or something like that. Any help is appreciated. Thanks

How much would my insurance be for an rsx 2003?

Ok so im thinking about getting a acura rsx 2003. Im 18. Had my license for over a year now. No tickets. Im a full time student at a college. ima be on my parents insurance. Their insurance company is esurance. I was wondering how much would my insurance be?

What insurance can i get ? need advise?

i am 17 years old and i got a truck and im going to get my license in a few days how can i get insurance for my truck and what will be the cheapest price ? i need advise on what i should do and how i should get insurance like should i get it under my dads insurance or how ?

How long will it take insurance company to pay off stolen car?

How long will it take for insurance company to pay for car? & what happens if they recover it?

Licence wrong date when applying for insurance?

when you get a quote along the way it asks you to enter when you recieved your licence. what if i put 2-3 years old when in actual fact it is only 2 months old. Will the insurance company find out that i am not telling the truth or can i get away with it? Do they check my licence to see when i got it. thanks.

Income Based Health Insurance in California?

I'm 18 years old and live at home with my dad/step mom. They don't have insurance through their employers, so neither do I and because their combined income is so high (6 figures) I'm not eligible for Medical or Medicaid. Any ideas on what I can do to get affordable health insurance? I have a job too...""

Whats the best way to cancel my car insurance?

Iv had my car insured fully come with Halifax since the 28th Dec and iv already paid around 450 on the policy but as they will not give me any sort of discount on to add my new car on the policy I want to cancel it but they want me to pay another 300 to cancel it, its only been insured for a month and I agreed to pay 1600 per year and they want nearly half of it, would it affect future insurance if I just cancelled it anyway?""

Car Insurance Question?

I was in a car wreak where it was the other persons fault....already determined by the police. I live in Tennessee by the way and I didnt have insurance at the time..even though I went out and got it an hour later. My question is who is responsible for paying for the damages to the person who hit me? Their insurance is already fixing my car, but the lady who hit me was driving her dads car and she only had liability but not on the car she was driving. Does she call my insurance company to have her dads car fixed even though it was her fault? Whos insurance pays for it? Or is she just outta luck?""

""Under Obama's healthcare policy, I can pay for affordable health insurance only when I am sick?ou like to ask?""

Obama said he will make sure Health Insurance companies will offer people with pre-exisiting condition. Right? So... I don't have to pay for Health Insurance now, because I am healthy and plus I can save some money. I can pay for Health Insurance after I hurt myself or get sick. Just pay monthly fee until I am well. Cool... Alright, fine. I guess the Health Insurance companies will have to pay my medical bills.""

""If your home is valued at 73,000, why would your insurance company raise the coverage to 101,000?""

If my house burns down, would they really pay out 100,000 or just the property value ?""

My Car insurance is too high!?

Im 17 years old, male i mean I would expect my insurance to be high because im a young driver and male...but not ridiculously high. I got a quote on comparison sites and the cheapest ...show more""

West Burlington New York Cheap car insurance quotes zip 13482

West Burlington New York Cheap car insurance quotes zip 13482

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How can i get my car out of the police pound when i havn't had a chance to get insurance?

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Buying a Toyota - price and insurance advice please?!?

I am going to pick up my new car today IF this is a good deal. Its a black 2008 Toyota Corolla S. I am buying it, its a 72 month pay schedule of $387 a month. Insurance for it and our 2002 Santa Fe (both full coverage) is $157 a month. Do these prices sound about right? I want to know if I'm getting a good deal. Also, do new cars need to be maintinenced every 5,000 miles? Someone said that on another question of mine and I was wondering if thats true. I want to know anything that is vital to purchasing a new car. We dont have great credit... both our scores are around 600. We are paying for the gap insurance and all that other good stuff. Oh and we're not trading a car - this is just straight up - no money down - our interest rate is 14%..... Thanks to answers""

Where can I get a fair priced car insurance for a first time driver at the age of 17 and Male?

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Should i tell my parents about the car accident i got into?car insurance question?

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Can I take my drivers test without insurance?

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Need help with car insurance?

I am a 16 year old male but turn 17 in October 27th and i really want to get driving asap. The problem is is that i am on a tight budget when it comes to it. Buying the car isn't to bad its the insurance. When im looking on websites its coming up with prices like 3000 but i managed to find prices around the 1800 for a year. Does anyone know of any cheap cars where i could get the insurance for cheaper than 1800 Thanks I live in the uk

How much will car insurance be for my 146 year old mother?

How much will car insurance be for my 146 year old mother?

California insurance--driving a friends car???

I'm not an insured driver, but is it illigal if I drive a friend's car (that is insured) in California? What happens if i get in a wreck? I dont normally drive, but in case my friend's been drinking sometimes she'll ask me to drive her home. thanks.""

Help with car insurance please help?

i have a 1997 nissan sentry i live in california i have the 15/30/25 on my coverage how much will i save if i change it to 15/30/5 which i believe is only the states quires, and also if i should do it and what is the difference for my medical coverage it says 5000 and and uninsured motorist is at the lowest coverage which is 15/30 please help. Thank you""

Car insurance expired what to do?

I bought an old car . its insurance expired on 9.7.12. how can i get it insured again?

Can i collect life insurance after a murder.?

My dad has a large life insurance policy on him and i am the head beneficiary. if he happens to be murdered by some unknown suspect would i be able to collect the money or would it have to be accidental or natural death.

Under the new Cash Allowance Rebate program is my vehicle eligible if the registration and insurance ran out?

I owned my jeep cherokee for four years continuously registered and insured but just recently moved to California from New Jersey and out of necessity just let the truck sit for a few months during which the reg and insur. just expired about three months ago. So now can I still use this as a redeemable option on a new car.

Car accident but no car insurance?

I was just in a car accident in which I was not at fault and the other driver was ticketed. I live in Florida and while my car was insured with PIP coverage under my fathers name. I was exempt from the coverage. I had to go to the hospital to get CT scans of my brain and neck area as well as multiple xrays. The other driver did have insurance and I wanted to know even though I had no insurance, when the drivers' insurance company gives me the compensating cash amount would I be able to use the hospital bills as part of the compensating amount? I know the reason you have car insurance is to cover any medical injury in an accident but I unfortunately didn't have the means. any info would be greatly appreciated!""

MetLife Dental Insurance...?

Does anyone know how this insurance actually works? I got this insurance through my employer (haven't had insurance in a LONG time!!), and from what I'm reading...it sounds like you have to pay for services up front, and then they reimburse you?? Is this how it works, or am I mistaken? I'm so confused, and really want to go get a general cleaning and exam....but don't have the money to pay for it when I go!""

Motorcycle insurance cost for m1?

16, live in canada, suzuki gs550, cheapest insurance? p.s. heard statefarm lets you do it by month, how much would that cost?""

Camaro Vs. Mustang which is cheaper?

Camaro vs. Mustang which is affortable? Would a 2012 Camaro Coupe more affortable than a Mustang 2012 Mustang. By affortable i mean like insurances/ gas/ and all that other stuffs. Which one is cheaper in total to own? TY

Auto Insurance Price?

Does anyone have a rough estimate of how much my auto insurance would cost per year? I'm a 19 year old female purchasing a 2000 Toyota camry.

Is liability insurance the same as renters insurance?

Is liability insurance the same as renters insurance?

How do I prevent myself from getting taken advantage of by the car insurance companies?

What steps do I need to take in order to always be well ahead of the tricks that car insurance companies would want to pull on me?

""New to real estate, question about auto insurance?""

I drive my parents car but i am not insured, now that i've joined a real estate firm, they want me to have them as an additional insured. So what can I do now? Do I have to get insurance under my name? And how much would it cost to get the firm as an additional insured?""

Does it cost money on my dad's insurance just getting a driver's license?

?

Looking for insurance to cover me?

lost my license and to get them back you have to have car that is insured,dont have car so the DMV said that i could insure myself.""

How much would 21 yr olds pay for car insurance with no credits?

How much would 21 yr olds pay for car insurance with no credits?

What kind of car will give a 17 year old cheap insurance?

i am 17 and im looking to buy a car. i wanted to know what kind of car will give me the cheapest insurance possible. including the color. and what ways can i save money on car insurance?

Car insurance lapsed? opposing insurance sends letter saying im liable.?

Long story short my insurance lapsed. I got into a car accident where i was backing out of a driveway and as i shifted the car into drive i was backed into my side driver door by ...show more

""How much is the yearly average insurance for a sixteen year old in LA, California.?""

How much is the yearly average insurance for a sixteen year old in LA, California.PS. Liability only. And if you need to know the car and insurance corp its an 1995 Ferrari f355, and 21st insurance. Please give real averages and i am serious so please real and serious answers. What i mean is please tell me the price only for a year. Please only serious and real answers.""

""I'm only a student & working part time, where can i get cheap car insurance...?""

I'm only working part time and i need to find a good insurance company, preferably one that won't charge me too much as i'm not earning a lot of money.""

Other driver was not covered under insurance?

I was in a car accident where the other driver (to be referred as The Idiot) was at fault. The police were called and The Idiot was given a warning citation. The insurance company called me today to inform me that the claim was being denied because The Idiot was not an authorized driver under the policy. It appears that The Idiot borrowed the car from his father. Now I am stuck with thousands of dollars in repairs that it appears will be billed back to me. What are my options?

Which Insurance Companies still have affordable maternity coverage?

My wife and me want to have a child. However, we are having a hard time finding a insurance company that provides maternity coverage at a affordable rate. Can someone help us?""

Does my degree affect my car insurance?

I'm looking at buying a Nissan Micra, and I've noticed whenever I enter my information and the websites ask my occupation I enter student and each website asks whether I study Medicine, Nursing or Teaching, and whether I study from home or live away. I am in fact a nursing student (mental health), living away, and I just wondered whether this makes my insurance more expensive or cheaper than someone doing a different degree such as History, Physics etc.""

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select quote life insurance

""Insurance on parents car, learner?""

basically, i wish to start learning to drive and i personally would prefer to be put on my mums insurance (50 moth quote from her insurance people with me as a learner) as i want to be taught by my dad rather than an instructor (many with dad then instructor after a few months) my question is; if i crash the car, with me driving with L plates with my dad/mum in passenger could or would i effect their no claim bonus OR put their premiums up? they only have a small 1.2""

Short Term health care insurance plan in California?

I am looking to get insurance for a short period of time - 2 months. Which plan and provider be appropriate ?

No minnesota auto insurance?

if i dont have auto insurance will i loose my drivers license and for how long i live in mn.if im caught

Where would be the cheapest place for insurance??????

ive recnetly turned 18 and i want to get a suzuki jimny soft top where is the best place

What Insurance is the cheapest for teenagers in texas?

What Insurance is the cheapest for teenagers in texas?

Auto insurance what gender is cheaper to insure?

Hello everyone well i have a question regarding auto insurance me and my wife are considered new drivers now its been awhile since we had a policy i realise women typically get better rates however will she get a much better rate or just slightly better i am 42 and she is 28 and we both have good driving records

Does anyone know the best way to get health insurance if you are self employed.?

I am self employed and never even thought about health insurance. I would be very grateful for some advice on how I can get this started, where to begin or if someone knows of companies that are good for self employed people.""

Car insurance question?

I just got a 94 Buick Park avenue a few weeks ago. I'm 17 and getting my license (hopefully) on the 25th of this month. I have a question about the insurance. Our company is Amica. I've gotten a quote recently from my dad talking to them. He told me today that after two cars are insured the third one is automatically listing me as the primary driver. I'd like to be able to be the 'secondary driver' to save money...anyone know if this is possible with this company?

Is a 2000/2001 BMW 323ci an expensive car to insure?

I know insurance costs depend on a number of factors, but, all that aside, does anyone know if this car is expensive to insure? (or any of the other higher up 3 series like the 330ci )""

How much is car insurance in NY state if your 17?

Ive been looking for how much car insurance is in ny if your 17 but i cant find it. My mom doesnt want to pay for it so i have to pay for it myself. Can someone tell me how much it costs?

Insurance and std testing?

A friend told me my previous partner was shady and shared needles, etc... so, now I want to get tested for everything as soon as possible. I was going to go to planned parenthood. But im also considering just going to my doctor since I need a physical anyways or even my gynecologist.. Aetna is my insurance. Which way would be more affordable? Would it be roughly the same for all 3? Would they cover more as part of a physical? Seperate? At all?""

Whats the best insurance?

Im still on my dads insurance till I'm 21, but it wont cover prenatal care for his children unless its his spouse having his baby.... which is like most insurance... so what is the best insurance for me to use? I need opinions.... THANKS A BUNCH!""

I got into a car accident and i have no insurance?

I rear ended this woman at only 20 miles an hour, she had absolutely nothing on her, not even a scratch . I have no insurance so she didn't call the police. Then she called this weekend she said her mechanic said it would cost over $500 because her air bags needed to be replaces due to this accident. Is she just trying to play me and did I have anything to do with those air bags? I decided she was lying to me, and decided not to pay. She then calls and says she's calling the police and reporting it as a hit and run, and calling a lawyer.""

What is a non-standard property/casualty insurance company?

How can you find out if your insurance company is non-standard? What makes a company non-standard?

How does liability insurance work?

I'm about to buy insurance & I know it's mandatory in te state of Louisiana to at least have liability. But how does it work? & if I let someone borrow my car are they covered?

What type of businesses that are good to call for all kind of insurances?

Like Health Care Insurances, Life Insurances, Employee Benefits""

Is it cheaper for a first time driver to insure a van?

Hello, If I were to buy my first car, the insurance is about 3k at lowest of the low. But do you think a van would be cheaper? Can a 17 year old get van insurance?""

Pregnant with no insurance?

medical/medicare did not approve me. what other healthplans are there?

Im pregnant and need insurance. Is there affordable prenatal insurance besides medicaid?

Medicaid denied me because I make 25 cents more than the allowed amount. I am 4 months pregnant and have not had any prenatal care due to lack of insurance and fighting with medicaid. Is there AFFORDABLE coverage that anyone knows about?

Motorcycle insurance in GTA?!?

Hey, I am 21 and has had motorcycle insurance now for the past 3 years and have been insured for a 2009 kawasaki ninja 250r. I am currently paying $1700 a year for insurance with td and have a perfect driving record. I want to switch my bike to a 2012 harley davidson iron 883 and just got a quote from them for $5500 a year!! I think that is ridiculous! Does anyone know of any good motorcycle insurance for harleys or are similar in age and paying less? I really want this bike but $5500 a year is nuts. I can buy a brand new ninja every year lmao.""

""Help, I need suggestions for health insurance. Please and thank you. Any ideas?""

My mom got laid off last year and I was on her health insurance. I'm 18 and I attend college. I'm looking for a low cost plan that will cover vision, dental, and regular check ups. Though something without vision is good also. I have no idea where to look. I don't want medicaid. Female, 18, single, no children, no disabilities or medication. Please help.""

In BC how much difference in insurance costs is it based on the cost of the?

vehicle? I'm not talking about liability but collision and comprehension. I'm buying a car that costs about 10,000.00 and I am used to driving crappy cars that cost $2000.00. I'm trying calculate the difference in insurance costs. Does anybody know?""

Why is it hard to find medical Insurances?

i have a heart condition, why is it hard to find medical insurances?""

Health insurance in CA?

I'm a college student thinking of getting health insurance that is affordable. What health insurance should I get? And what's the cost of the insurance per month? Thank you

Quote for Car Insurance!?

Hello, I need some help in with Car Insurance...............So, I want to purchase a Honda Accord coupe iES 1997-1999, I went on those car insurance compare sites and was quoted over 4000pounds!!! Here is the information I gave there, i was born in 1990, have license for 5 years, I have an international drivers license, I started living in the UK in April 2013, unemployed......Can someone please tell me why i was quoted so much money!! I even tried putting my partner who has been driving for 14 years and no luck! Is there any way for me to get cheaper car insurance? And is comprehensive or third party cheaper for me? Thankxx""

select quote life insurance

select quote life insurance

Do I need condo insurance in Florida?

As of Jan 1st 2009, our HOA requires us to show proof of insurance. I believe it is statue Section 718.111 (11). Anyways, I really don't have the money for condo insurance right now. I have read online that the HOA can purchase this insurance for me and then assess me for the balance. I recently moved to Port St Lucie, Fl where everyone is unemployed and foreclosures are so common. Anyways, can they place a lien if I do not provide them with proof of the insurance or will they just lay off for awhile? I appreciate any feedback right now as I am so worried. Thanks.""

Health insurance question for college student?

I'm a dependent college student under my parents health insurance plan and I was wondering if I take a semester off does the college notify the health insurance agency of my absence or do I have to notify them? health insurance provider is CSEA.

I need health insurance I'm self-employed?

I want to get Health Insurance but I'm not sure where to start. I havnt been to a doctor in a few years. I'm 39 and in good health. Will they require a physical from a doctor?

Cheapest car insurance?

Whats the cheapest car insurance for a teenager? Permit .....

Do you have to have vehical insurance?

do you have to have an insurance. I just want to use it for awhile.

Car insurance question?

how much is car insurance for a Mitsubishi lancer for a young driver

Affordable health insurance?

for milwaukee wisconsin?

Average Insurance rate for teenager in ontario?

Hey, Im gonna be getting my g2 in a couple of months and i've saved up about $6000 for a half decent car for school so i can stop taking the **** transit service brampton has. My parents agreed to pay for insurance as long as its not too expensive. I will be going under their name i guess as i heard its cheaper but the only risk is that if i mess up the car, their insurance will go up so ill have to be extra careful.. Whats the average rate for insurance for a 16-year old male with pretty good grades (if that matters). the car wont be something expensive obviously but im also 16 so its gonna be something cool of course ahaha. most likely wont have turbo installed but comestically modified (body kit, sound system, exhaust mods etc.) All insurances are through RBC with my parents so i know thatll make it cheaper for me since they basically bank with that only bank thanks !""

How do I purchase life insurance?

I'd like to purchase a life insurance policy, but have no financial savvy past Google. How do I go about this? What are the pitfalls? Do I need an agent? Any recommended companies? (It would have to be rated at least A- or better by A.M. Best). I'm a twenty-one year old unmarried non-smoking student. I'm in good physical health, though there's some family history of heart disease. No dangerous activities. (It must look odd for me to be checking into this at my age. It's a long story, but rest assured I don't plan on dying anytime soon.) I'd like an affordable policy with a payout of 105,000$ or a little over. Simplicity and good customer service would be nice of course. I'm pretty busy with school as it is. Finally: term or whole? I understand most people think term is the way to go, but considering my youth and good health would I be better off with something permanent? I know I'm going to want to be insured until my eventual (assumedly far-off) demise. Thanks for your time.""

Can a home insurance company increase the amount of insurance on your house without your request?

Of course when the amount of insurance in increased, the insurance premium also increases. I have only $125,000 left on the mortgage and insurance company has increased the insurance to cover a value of $305,000. Real estate value of the home is $450,000. My credit rating is excellent and I have not had any insurance claims""

Buying a used car and purchasing a car insurance in Tucson?

Hi. Im going to study in tucson for the next 2 years as an international student. I want to buy a car, and I am looking for a place that would be known to sell used cars at a fair price (I am not looking for something more than 7-8000). It would also be nice it those car would come with a warranty. Do you know good places for that? Also if you can advice me with car insurance that would be nice. Thank you a lot!""

How Much Does Dog Owner Liability Insurance Cost?

I am looking in to getting a basenji/ miniature pinscher mix. The dog is only 19 lbs so it not a very big dog but the apartments I live in require this kind of insurance in case it bites someone. I would like to know monthly and yearly cost. (I dont have renters insurance I just want to know dog liability insurance)

Is it true that 2-door-car more expensive to insure than 4-door-car?

For an example, civic coupe (2 doors) and civic sedan (4 doors). I heard that all 2-door-cars will be considered as a sport car. However, some people say that it is not always that way. I personally won't consider civic coupe as a sport car because I think it isn't. Can someone please clarify this matter to me? Also, which insurance company do you think is the best to insure your car? thank you!""

How much do you spend monthly on Repairs and Maintenance for your car?

Question is pretty straight forward: How much do you spend monthly on Repairs and Maintenance for your car? (Don't include insurance or gas) Thanks

Insurance Claim Question?

I was rear ended recently and the other drivers insurance co sent out their adjuster. I was told that my car was a total loss. I had a 94 Buick Park Avenue with 148K miles. I got a call from the person who appraised the value of my car and was told that my car was worth $2,200.00 and another $300.00 for what it would have cost me for a rental, totaling $2561. and some change. I did some looking around and found in the auto trader that I can get the same car selling for $2,995 with 154,605 miles. The question I have is do I have to except their offer of $2,200? Also, if I except this offer is this separate from the medical side of my claim? Thank You in advanced.""

Is the amount you paid for your car covered by full insurance if an uninsured motorist hits you?

A friend was stopped at a light when some idiot hit her car and totalled it! Although, she has full coverage on the car(she just recently finished paying off), the idiot who hit her did not have any insurance! The total she paid on her car was $13K. The insurance company only wants to give her the blue book value of $3000! The situation is even worse because the offending party have no insurance! Is the insurance company trying to rip her off?! What should she do to get back at least close to the total amount she paid for her car?""

What do i need to get a car registered at a california dmv?

i called the office some lady told me only my id? im confused i thought i would need insurance and license but the lady told me different.. please let me know thanks

What should i look for in Health Insurance? ?

i am 19, ill be 20 on 10/29. live on my own.(so i kinda have a budget) this year i went to see a doctor 3 times so far... (when i had health insurance) i dont get sick often but when i do get sick, i get really sick... i dont just get a cough... i get it all. ear infections. fevers, ect. i usually end up in the emergency room about once a year. so what should i look for in health insurance? thanks!!""

How much are geckos i found one for 7.00. at petco i thought they were a lot more money.?

a while back i went to petco and seen it. It was a bright green gecko. it looked like the one from the car insurance place and it was like 3-4 inches but it was 7.00 so i was just wondering.

Where can i look for insurance if you are self employed?

I am currently employed in a coporation and have health coverage. I was planning on leaving but with my family history and my current medication for high blood pressure. I don't know if i can get coverage and it be pre-existing?

Car insurance= cover all drivers?

if somebody has car insurance with everything on it possible as far as what you can buy ( plans like pip, medical, liablity etc ) is any driver of that car, covered if in a wreck? or will the person driving been liable? geico""

How to get insurance coverage when between jobs?

My wife had her own health insurance with her previous employer, and I have my own with my employer. We do not have kids. She started a new job, but probation period for benefits is 3 months. She worked for a dental office of 5 employees, so I don't think COBRA is an option for her plus it's really expensive. Is it possible to add her to my work insurance plan for only 3 months mid calendar year?""

I need liability insurance for a small taxi company in NJ. Anyone have any recommendations?

I need liability insurance for a small taxi company in NJ. Anyone have any recommendations? Also need price quotes for both taxi car insurance or limo car insurance.

2005 Mustang V6 Insurance?

I'm 20 years old, have a clean driving record, and qualify for most merit-based discounts (no wrecks, good grades, etc.). I'm currently driving a 1998 Pontiac Grand Prix GT with a 3.8L V6, and paying about $800 per year listed as the primary driver of this car. I cannot possibly stress enough that I know having a newer car that I am still making payments on will increase my insurance. My question is basically if the change in price will be drastically higher than if I got full coverage on my current car. I was thinking I could expect somewhere in the range of $1500 - $2000 per year. Is that about right, or am I way off?""

Is it legal for me to drive this antique car?

Hello. My dad has just offered me his old MGB. During the talk about it, he said if I get it running I can have it. But he also said that I might need to be 21 to drive a car with antique plates. We have Geico. Is this true? Thanks guys.""

select quote life insurance

select quote life insurance

https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/auto-home-insurance-quotes-nc-alyssa-mcmillan/"

[myperpetualstudentworld-blog]

Part 3 – Temporary staff and contract workers to cover for maternity leave: How mat leave benefits non-mothers!

I want to focus on what I feel to be an often-overlooked benefit of mothers taking extended maternal leave: that of the contract worker who fills in for a mother on leave. As the below job posting illustrates, the demand for contract workers is ever-present:

I obtained my current job by taking a maternity-leave contract position. This was 3 years ago (and if you are wondering – yes, the woman who went on maternity leave did return to her pre-leave position).

Stepping Stones for Other Women

One truly excellent facet of women temporarily leaving the work force for an extended period of time to raise their baby is that in many companies, this necessitates hiring a temporary replacement. In cases such as these, the hiring criteria may not be as stringent as they would be for a full-time employee. In my case, this meant that I could get a job that I probably wouldn’t have gotten if I was seeking the same position but as a permanent employee. It was a complete change in industry and allowed me to develop new skills and strengthen my resume, while exposing me to a new field.

A Foot in the Door

Taking a maternity leave contract can be a great way for someone to get a foot in the door for a company they want to work at (Katbamma, 2008). If the contract worker does a good job and is well liked, the company may find or even create a position to keep them on. The mother on maternity leave doesn’t need to fear being replaced since her job is secured while she is on leave (Dubé, 2017).

Lengthy Maternity Leave Good for Non-Mothers

In this way, lengthy maternity leaves in Canada (ranging from 12 to 18 months) benefits not only the mothers taking the leave, but also other people in the work force who can benefit from the work growth opportunity. If maternity leave were shorter, some employers may decide it is not worth the hassle to hire a temporary replacement, and instead distribute the work amongst other coworkers. By doing so, this could potentially create animosity or resentment amongst the coworkers who are tasked with taking on an extra workload. Longer maternity leaves essentially necessitate hiring a person to take over the work, while also ensuring the job security of the new-mother, and in this way, many women win.

The Positive Effect on Employment Rates

Although Canada’s unemployment rate is pretty good, without maternity leave positions, it would be worse. As such, extended maternity leave also helps to increase the employment rate by allowing for more job openings, however temporary these jobs may be [It is worth noting that when calculating unemployment, women on maternity leave are not considered to be unemployed (Corak, 2012)].

Reader Feedback:

What about you? Any readers out there end up advancing their careers through taking on a maternity leave position or taking on extra work for a coworker who was off on maternity leave?

References

Corak, Miles. (2012, February 3). Unemployment is actually worse than the numbers say. Globe and Mail Blog. Retrieved from: https://beta.theglobeandmail.com/report-on-business/economy/economy-lab/unemployment-is-actually-worse-than-numbers-show/article543301/?ref=http://www.theglobeandmail.com&

Dubé, Dani-Elle (2017). Pregnant? Know your rights in the workplace. Global News. Retrieved from: https://globalnews.ca/news/3756871/pregnant-know-your-rights-in-the-workplace/

Katbamma, Mira (2008, June 23). Cover Stars. The Guardian. Retrieved from: https://www.theguardian.com/money/2008/jun/23/workandcareers.maternitycover