#for HEALF | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

stevenose · 10 months

Text

don’t delete the kisses - 5/?

landing page

a camboy!steve au

this installment contains: camboy!steve; confessions!!!; heavy petting/making out!; a rude interruption!

authors note: we made it to the chapter besties! hope you likey :) more to come ofc! as always feedback slays and is so important to me and my menal healf

you’re still alive when steve checks on you an hour later. you’re laying sideways, head pressed into his pillow, looking at your phone. his heart skips, slides up and catches in his throat. he’s quiet when he shuts the door, and you sigh loudly, an acknowledgment of his presence.

“you doin’ okay?” he asks softly, approaching. he grabs his streaming chair and pulls it in to sit close.

you groan and throw your phone down face first. “ugh.”

“that good?”

“i’m gonna kill him,” you mumble. “so embarrassing.”

“hey,” he says, hand twitching to touch yours. “no one’s even talked about it.”

you squint at him. well, you’re already squinting, but you squint harder. “don’t lie.”

“honest,” he says, holding out his damn pinky.

you begrudgingly take it, and you both hold on to the other for a moment too long. your stomach flips - you’ve been awake for about ten minutes and already had to talk yourself out of an anxiety attack. you never could have dreamed of being in steve’s bed. but being in steve’s bed because you can’t handle your weed? that never ever crossed your mind.

it was disorienting. you only remember a few fragments of being in here, of steve tucking you in. you don’t know how much time has passed. “everyone go home?”

steve laughs. “it’s been an hour.”

you sigh. “explains why i still feel like shit.” you want to roll your eyes at his worried expression, but it’s still incredibly sweet. “i’m good, promise. probably can go home toni-“

“no.” he says it so confidently. “jesus, i knew you were going to say that.”

“well, i think i can!”

“absolutely not! no. no. you can have my bed-“

“don’t be ridiculous,” you huff. it’s still hard to speak without slurring. “if you stole my keys-“

“i did.”

“then i’ll sleep on the floor.”

“well, we can just share the bed.”

a silence falls over the room. it feels like you’ve been dunked in cold water.

“it’s a king,” he adds sheepishly.

you’re still quiet. you hate when he’s right, and you hate that you can’t go home, and you hate that you might have to share a bed with him. you hate yourself for smoking so much when you should have listened to him. and you hate not knowing what happened within the last hour.

“i hope i didn’t say anything stupid,” you say suddenly. you need confirmation.

and you truly expect to get a brushed off “no” or a scoff. but steve pauses. opens his mouth, then stammers a little. “n-no, nothing stupid.”

you’re panicking now, forcing yourself to sit up. “steve,” you urge, “what did i do?”

“nothing! nothing bad -“

“what did i say?”

you can tell his mind’s running too quick for his voice to catch up with. “you - uh. mmm. you - well, you said something about my bedsheets.”

“your bedsheets?”

steve swallows hard. he seems just as panicked as you. “you said they used to be checkered.”

you’re not totally sober, so you’re not entirely sure what the implication is. because his sheets were checkered and now they’re this boring navy -

“oh.” it’s more to yourself than him. you remember how you knew that now.

“and - and something about my dumb bowling pin?”

you’re frozen. you swallow anxiously. you don’t know what to say.

“how did you know about those?” steve scoots his chair in a little closer. he’s stressed, too. and you know you should tell him the truth, but how could you?

“you’ve told me about ‘em,” you say nervously. “i’ve seen pictures.”

“i went through our texts. i never sent any pictures and i’ve never told you about them.”

“in person, then.”

he purses his lips. “i don’t think so.”

you’re gnawing on your bottom lip and it’s right about to bleed. steve leans forward and gingerly pops it out from between your teeth. his hand lingers on your cheek. “did you watch me?”

his voice is low and soft. it’s an accusation, but it doesn’t sound like it. he just seems confused - maybe a little hopeful.

your panic increases, especially with his skin on yours, but you’re stuck. trapped. you swallow again before tears spring up in your eyes. “i’m sorry.”

“hey,” he says, putting his other hand on your face, thumbs wiping away the tears spilling over. “it’s okay. i told you to, didn’t i? pestered you for weeks, ‘course you did.”

despite his comfort, he’s panicking. he’s damn near incriminated himself of jacking off to you, and you might’ve seen it. “just a peak, huh? no way you paid. right?”

you just stare, a few more tears falling.

his face falls. “right?”

you take in a deep breath and push his hands down away from your face. his closeness is overwhelming. “i just got curious. okay? wanted to see, so i - i paid for the basic access and i watched a few.” you’re such a fucking liar, but he doesn’t need to know how much money you’ve spent. how you’ve egged him on. he doesn’t need that right now. if ever. “i know - i’ve totally broken your trust and i’m so sorry. i feel so gross about it, steve, i haven’t watched in a month. christ, that sounds so pathetic -“

“a month?” he interrupts. he looks like he’s seen a ghost. “well - wait, when did you start?”

your lip’s between your teeth again, but this time he doesn’t nudge it back out. “remember when… when i started to act weird at work?”

he processes the time before slowly leaning back in his chair, exhaling heavily. he runs his hand through his hair. “how much did you see?” he asks after a moment.

your face feels like it’s caught on fire and you look at the collar of his shirt to avoid his eyes. “a lot.”

“how much is a lot?”

you look at him pathetically. “i’m sorry.” you almost sob. “i know i’m a pervert and it’s so fucked up of me, i never should have looked, steve. just got - fuck, i just got so - i don’t know. i don’t know.”

you wish he’d say anything. that he would kick you out or yell at you. but he just stares until you’re about to scream.

“i’ll go,” you start, sniffling, but steve suddenly leans forward again. he rests a hand on your thigh.

“do you know what i think about?”

you blink. “what?”

“do you have any idea what i think about when i touch myself?”

you pause and shake your head. you feel so small when he’s looking at you like this.

“i think about you.”

you blink again. “i’m sorry?”

“if anyone’s the pervert,” he says, voice low. you have to lean in to hear him, your noses almost colliding, “it’s me. i’ve been fucking myself on camera to the thought of you for months. i’ve tried, i have - i’ve tried so hard to not think about you, but - well, you’re kind of all i think about, anyway.”

it’s as if all the air in your lungs was sucked out. you can’t even think of what to say. you’re so shocked and god, you’re aroused by it, by the confirmation that the coworker he was moaning about was you. “wow,” is what you come up with.

“yeah,” he says, laughing nervously. “wow.”

you spend some time evening your breathing. you’re thankful steve isn’t pushing, as nervous as he looks. he opens his mouth to apologize, but you speak over him.

“i’ve touched myself to you, too.”

it makes him shiver, skin pebbling. he can’t fucking believe it. “say it again,” he whispers after a beat.

you want to die. “i’ve touched myself to you.”

“like -?”

“like. i watched you and i’d….”

another silence. downstairs, you hear people cheering. they must be playing a game.

steve’s chair squeaks as he shuffles in it. he licks his lips. “are you high?” he asks.

“a little,” you admit. “but - it’s all true.”

he nods. “are you okay?”

“i’m fine, i think.”

he nods again, his eyes flicking down to your bitten lips. “tell me you want me.”

your brows furrow. “what?”

he leans in further. your noses finally bump. he smells like hairspray and coca cola and that stupidly expensive cologne he bragged about last week - the one you’ve been missing since you first smelled it. “i’ll give you everything. just tell me - tell me you want me. please.”

your foreheads touch. his breath is hot against your lips. you’re scared, terrified, but you know the truth. “i need you, steve.”

kissing steve is the opposite of what you’d dreamed of. you thought it’d be rough and fast and instead, he’s slow and gentle. certainly knows what he’s doing. you sigh, hands reaching to rest around his neck. he pulls back after a moment, pupils blown. “say it again.”

you giggle, high now on his attention and affection. “i need you, steve.”

now you’re on your back, and he’s kissing you like you’d imagined. still methodical, still calculated, but harder and faster. it’s hard to keep up, but you do, months of admiration catching up to you both. you can’t believe it, not even entirely sure this isn’t a hallucination. half convinced that you’ll snap out of it and be laying in his bed fucked up all over again.

“you have no idea-“ he says against your lips. “-how fucking long i wanted to hear that.” he climbs over you, helping you scoot back so he can place a knee between your thighs. “when did you stop watching? tell me, please, gotta know.”

“i - oh my - when -“ he cuts you off with a kiss and you squeak, speaking when he pulls back enough. “like a month ago, after the stream - when - oh my god.”

his knee’s pressed right between your legs now, giving you enough to grind down on. he’s moving like he’s insatiable, his lips now trailing down your jaw and to your neck. “tell me,” he repeats.

“i was on that st-stream — mmm — when you didn’t get to cum - trying to hit your goal -“

“fuck,” he moans, pulling back. “when you texted me? you were fucking watching?”

you feel evil. “sorry i ruined your orgasm.”

“holy shit,” he breathes. “honey - you should’ve kept watching.” his lips are back on your neck, hands pawing at your shirt. “came to you so many times. just about said your name in some of ‘em. had to bite it back - felt so fucked up after. i think i’m addicted to you.”

steve sucks a hickey into your skin and you moan loudly. he puts a hand over your mouth and you’re shocked at how hot it is. “shhh, gotta be quiet, don’t want someone to walk in, huh?”

you shake your head and he shakes his, too. “can’t believe this. thought you hated me or something.” he takes his hand away for you to answer, moving back to your neck.

“i - no, i - how could i? i just - i was worried, didn’t think - didn’t know - and i was b-breaching your p-privacy.”

“i wanted you to,” he mumbles into your skin. “so bad. y’know how hard it was that night when we almost-? after i took you out?”

“that’s being very generous,” you breathe, “considering the company th- that was there.”

“only wanted you to come,” he admits. “didn’t want to make you uncomfortable - i really didn’t think - blowin’ my mind that you’re under me right now. that you -“ he laughs. “that you sabotaged a stream.”

“hope i can make it up to you.”

steve grins. “think you will.”

he’s kissing down your neck again, to your collarbone, nipping at it. “eddie made me so fuckin’ mad,” he continues, “touching you like that.”

you gasp as his thumbs roll over your nipples. you feel lightheaded. “i know. you’ve got an expressive face, y’know.”

he scoffs. “no i don’t.”

“whatever,” you smile. your fingers move to dig into his shoulder blades. “eddie - he told me you talked to him ‘bout making me uncomfortable.”

steve looks up, sheepish again. “well, didn’t he?”

“not at all. it was hot watching you get irritated.”

he rolls his eyes.

“like that,” you smile.

“you played so hard to get,” he murmurs, pressing his knee against you harder, making you gasp. “come on, show me how hot.”

you throw your head back as you grind against him, his hands moving under your shirt. “wasn’t intentional.”

“i know.” his hands stop right below where you want them. “you can trust me, okay? i really like you. too much. robin’s been riding me about it forever. i - honestly, i felt a little crazy without having you.”

your stomach flips and you grind down on his leg again. “yeah? me, too.”

a sudden bang on the door. it makes you both jump. “harrington!” eddie’s shouting.

steve squeezes his eyes shut. “do you ever shut up?” he shouts over his shoulder.

“emergency!”

“what?” he snaps.

“we’re out of beer!”

you burst into laughter at the look of shock and anger on steve’s face. he looks back down at you and starts laughing with you, anger melting.

“i’m dying out here!”

“don’t you have some fucked up weed to smoke instead?” you shout.

you hear eddie gasp. “they live!”

“your shouting woke them from the dead!” steve admonishes.

“guess we have to cut it short?” you ask, cradling his face in your hand.

“guess so,” he sighs. “might be a good thing.”

you falter. “why?”

“need you to myself,” he mumbles, leaning forward, nose on nose. “wanna be the only one hearing the sounds you make.”

taglist: @sillypurplemurple @kknockursocksofff @knowitsforthebetterr @micheledawn1975 @thehermitsaltar @loverofmarsss @unbetaedimagines @mikefaistwasinnewsies @localbnbg @starlitlakes @the-fairy-anon @cloudroomblog @inmyh0rnyvillainera @sherrylyn628 @piecsesrising @mandyjo8719 @astermath @mochminnie

#steve harrington smut #steve harrington x reader #steve x reader #stevenose posts #ns/fw #camboy!steve

425 notes · View notes

youraveragenicaddict · 1 year

Text

Xavier Thorpe x Male Reader Headcannons

A/N - sup my dudes, chicks and everything in between. I have risen from the dead aka depression and i decided to give y’all something i haven’t seen YET - a Xavier Thorpe x male reader ( cuz i’m a simp for dudes who look healf dead and tired as hell lmao) so enjoy :)) (if yall want me to write sum u can try submitting it but like i can’t promise that i will write it cuz im lazy af, but u can try ur luck lmao

First of all, I would like to imagine you’d be an Addams

And alternative like the rest of your family

When you run into him after you finished unpacking and left to find your sister, he wouldn’t give you much thought

And the fact that after running into him and falling down you curse, A LOT

‘‘Aw fucking hell man, watch where you’re going!’‘

And speed walking away after getting up

After that, he’d definitely be intrigued

Xavier is a sucker for alternative people let’s be honest

You would catch him staring when you’re reading and listening to The Cure or System of a Down

But then again, he’s probably staring at someone behind you or something, no way he’d be into you, a dude, right? And no way you’d be into him, out of all people.

That all changes after you keep seeing him in the hallways, you both are whipped for each other.

One day, you were walking to class and there were no seats left, except for the one next to him

Just your luck! ( Don’t lie, you’d be happy)

‘‘Hey, uhh, is this seat taken?’‘

‘‘Hi’‘

‘‘Is it?’‘

‘‘Uh no yeah no it’s not’‘, he stumbles over his words while moving his bag away so you can sit.

‘‘Cool, thanks, man.’‘

After that, you start to greet him when you see him, which is quite often since you both go to Nevermore.

Sometimes, you even start a conversation about art and other things, like teasing him about being in a secret club, which you definitely didn’t hear from your sister Wednesday.

Those little hi’s and hello’s turn into something else at the Rave’N.

Xavier is left stunned and speechless after your entrance. You were wearing combat boots, a beautiful black suit, and a fancy black dress shirt.

At first, you didn’t get along with Bianca, but after a heartwarming conversation about things you hate, you find out you actually have a lot in common, and she definitely notices your and Xavier’s mutual pinning, so she basically pushes him out of his seat to go talk to you.

‘‘Wow, Y’N, uh you look amazing, just, wow’‘

He stutters out.

‘‘Thanks, you look great too, can’t say that white is my favorite color but it suits you. Wanna dance?’’

‘‘Yes, yeah, definitely.’’

After dancing the night away, you decide it’s too stuffed inside so you leave to get some air. The cold night air never felt better. That’s not the only thing you wanted, you pull out a pack of cigarettes and light one. Ah nicotine, my beloved.

Of course, Xavier finds you and joins you on the cold ground after a few minutes, when your cigarette is smoked only halfway.

‘‘Since when do you smoke?’‘ He questions you.

‘‘Since I don’t know, it just happened. Uncle Fester offered me a cigar once and it kind of went on from there.’‘ You say smiling at him, which is quite rare.

Both of you sit in comfortable silence for a while, watching the stars and enjoying each other’s company.

‘‘Hey, may I ask you something?’‘

Xavier asks, clearly nervous about something. Without thinking, you put one of your hands over his, thinking it would comfort him, but it only makes him freeze.

‘‘Oh shit, sorry, my bad.’‘ You utter, sad when he pulls his hand away.

‘‘Oh no, it’s not that I don’t like it, you know, it’s not that I don’t like you, no I like you, uhm’‘ Xavier rambles on trying to find the right words.

‘‘What I’m trying to say is that I like you, I don’t know if I only like guys or girls or both but I know that I definitely like you, like I like guys, more specifically you.’‘

That wasn’t anything you were planning on hearing from him. You’re frozen in place, mouth agape just staring at him.

‘‘If it makes you uncomfortable I’ll if you don’t want to talk to me again and..’‘

You cut him off mid-sentence, pulling him by his tie into a kiss. At first, he doesn’t kiss you back, but after a short while, you can feel him ease into it.

When you pull back you can hear him utter a small whoa, which makes you slightly laugh.

Xavier is definitely smiling at you, admiring how beautiful you are.

‘‘Oh fuck off Thorpe.’‘ You scoff at him, slightly elbowing him in the shoulder.

‘‘You like me, you, Y/N Addams, like me.’‘ He retorts, grinning at you.

‘‘Yes, I like you, you idiot. Now come here, I want another kiss.’‘

#xavier thorpe #xavier thorpe x reader #xavier thorpe x you #x reader #reader insert #fanfic #fanfiction #wednesday #netflix #wednesday tv show #wednesday netflix #x trans male reader #male reader #male #x male reader #x m!reader #xavier thorpe x male reader #xavier thorpe x m!reader

2K notes · View notes

mncxbe · 8 months

Text

Kintsugi

Part 2 .... Part 1

𝑨𝒌𝒖𝒕𝒂𝒈𝒂𝒘𝒂, 𝑲𝒖𝒏𝒊𝒌𝒊𝒅𝒂, 𝑭𝒚𝒐𝒅𝒐𝒓 𝒙 𝒇𝒆𝒎!𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒅𝒆𝒓

𝑮𝒆𝒏𝒓𝒆: fluff♡/ light angst??/ Fedya's redemption arc

// little warning for toxic relationships

°☆○

𝑨𝒌𝒖𝒕𝒂𝒈𝒂𝒘𝒂

doesn't understand at first why you're so emotional when he brings you little gifts or asks for your opinion/ consent all the time; but he doesn't ask about it

he only decides to press the matter when he notices you're kinda wary around him, especially after he had a rough day at work and isn't in the best mood

and oh mama

when you tell him your exes would take their anger out on you (doesn't have to be physical abuse, even if they just yelled or so) he is so distraught

he's like name and address please; he wants to go after those guys

but after you reassure him that it's all good now, he promises he'd never harm you in any way

'Why is she acting like this?' he asked himself for the nth time that evening. Arm resting on the side of his couch, his piercing gaze followed your every move; in the background the TV rolled a generic movie, the high pitched voices of the actors going right past him.

You were in the kitchen, occupying your time with meaningless activities: scrubbing the counters, cleaning the dishes, polishing the cutlery, refolding the towels to make sure they weren't getting crumpled.

But why? Why weren't you spending time with him?

Your boyfriend had a terrible day at work and all he wanted was to spend the rest of the day with you. But the second he stepped into your shared apartment and uttered a healf-hearted 'Hello love' you turned your back to him and did everything in your power to avoid him.

At first he thought you were simply busy, but three hours have passed since he returned home and you were still haphazardly moving around the apartment.

"Hey, Y/N. Can we talk for a bit?" he asked eventually.

Akutagawa watched you place the wet sponge on the edge of the sink and make your way to his side, still avoiding eye contact.

"Are you ok?"

"Yes" you said briefly, fixating a spot on the carpet.

Your boyfriend only huffed in response, hooking a finger under your chin to make you look at him.

"Look, Y/N. I'm not sure what's going on but if I upset you in any way please let me know."

The tinge of sadness in his voice caused you to sigh, your eyebrow knitting in frustration.

"No, Ryuu. You didn't do anything wrong. I just noticed you weren't in the best mood and assumed you wanted some time alone, that's all."

Your boyfriend was baffled, at a loss of words. "Why would you just assume that?" he pressed, eyes narrowing.

"I... I guess it's a bad habit I picked up from my past relationships. Sorry, it was silly of me. I should've asked what you wanted me to do." you said with a smile.

But Akutagawa wasn't happy with your answer. He had noticed this recurring behaviour and wanted to know more, so you told him everything: how your last partners would yell at you whenever they had a bad day and how you learned to just mind your own business in moments like that.

"Did they ever hit you?" he eventually asked and you could see the shadow of relief in his eyes when you shook your head.

"No, it wasn't anything bad. Don't worry."

Your boyfriend nodded, his lips curling in a gentle smile. "At least that"

His slender fingers let go of your chin and took your hand in his, pressing his lips to your knuckles; causing a pink hue to rise to your cheeks.

"I hope you know I'd never lash out on you, no matter how shitty my day is. My work and our relationship and two different things and I won't let one influence the other, ok?" he said in a gentle voice, earning a smile from you.

"Thank you love. And sorry for ignoring you all day. You don't even know what it took for me not to hug you"

With that your arms wrapped around his neck and he leaned back, propping himself up against the edge of the couch. You cuddled against his chest, body flush against his as his arms came to rest loosely on your hips. He breathed in and chuckled when he noted the fresh smell of cleaning supplies on your skin.

"Don't worry your pretty head about it. I'm not mad at you. Plus, the kitchen it spotless now so I have nothing to comment."

His remark caused a mirthful laughed to roll off your lips and he smiled again, placing a kiss to the crown of your head. Now, with you by his side, Akutagawa could finally relax.

𝑲𝒖𝒏𝒊𝒌𝒊𝒅𝒂

he's so oblivious omg

doesn't really think your reactions to his kind gestures are out of place; but he does wonder why you're so impressed all the time

he strongly believes that you deserve to be treated like the queen you are so ofc he does just that

at some point he asks you about past relationships; just because he's curious

but when you tell him that your exes were all a bunch of assholes who've never treated you well he's so sad

I see him almost crying because he loves you so much

you're the one who ends up reassuring him that he's a great boyfriend and that you're happy with him djjdjdj

"Love, are you ok?" you asked in a worried tone as you watched your boyfriend lean forward, head resting in the palms of his calloused hands.

Kunikida's mind could not comprehend what you just told him. It all started with a harmless conversation about your past relationships; he was simply curious and wanted to know what they were like. But he certainly didn't expect you to tell him something like this.

At a loss of words, your boyfriend's gaze fixates his shoelaces, counting the number of times they looped in and out of the eyelets.

One...two...three...four...

He just couldn't believe it: how could anyone treat someone like you so harshly? so badly? How could anyone raise their hand at you or deny you things or raise their voice at you? It was beyond comprehension.

Kunikida thought of all the things you went though, all the toxic relationships you had to endure and felt tears pooling at the corner of his eyes; a burning sensation grazing at the back of his throat.

"Love?" you asked again, wrapping an arm around his shoulders.

Your boyfriend straightened his back and arranged his glasses. "Yes, I'm alright. Sorry for that."

But the slight quiver of his voice didn't escape you, your lips curling in a sad smile.

"Oof Kunikida baby please don't be mad over this. I'm okay now."

Taking off his square-framed glasses you cupped his cheeks, placing a kiss on the tip of his nose.

"Don't bother with those guys. What matters is that you treat me well and make me happy. Never doubt that" you reassured him.

Your boyfriend smiled softly, glossy eyes finally rising to meet yours.

"You sure you're happy, right? I mean if there's anything I'm doing wrong please let me know and-"

"No, no. Shush." you cut him off "You're amazing Kuni. You're the best boyfriend I could ever ask for and I'm truly so grateful for you."

Your gentle words got to him this time and he sighed, feeling the knot that formed in his chest slowly untangle.

"I'm glad then, sweetie" he added, kissing you briefly on the lips. "I'll keep giving you my best, I promise. I'm never gonna give up on us."

"Oh I know darling but don't worry" you said sweetly, leaning closer to kiss him again "You're already perfect"

𝑭𝒚𝒐𝒅𝒐𝒓

I don't think he's surprised to find out you've been in toxic relationships; he knows how cruel people are at heart

still feels bad you had to go through toxic relationships

insists you tell him everything that bothered you about your exes and damn he realizes that he himself has many of those toxic traits👀

ofc he's not toxic to you but overall? he gaslights, manipulates and lies like it's his second nature so... yea. this discovery kinda hits hard

he does however try his best to be a better man for you, because he knows you deserve the best and he'll give you just that

Cold sweeps of rain poured down the tinted glass windows as you and your partner quietly sipped on a glass of red wine. It was a rare occurance to see Fyodor drink - he considered drinking to be immoral, a mere vice for lowly humans- but he did indulge you from time to time. It helped him let loose and gave him the courage to ask or do things he wouldn't normally do.

"So, myshka" he began, glossy gaze darting from your eyes to your lips "Tell me about that ex of yours. What was his name... Haruki?"

A lighthearted chuckled rolled off your lips. "Yea, Haruki. Well... He wasn't the best really. Looking back I'm not really sure why I stayed with him for so long."

"How comes?"

"Well..." you said sheepishly, thumb sliding along the brim of your glass "At first he was really nice: always bringing me flowers and taking me on dates. But when we grew accustomed to each other he changed quite a lot. He became avoidant. Whenever I'd bring up an issue I had he'd just dismiss it."

You took a short break and exhaled deeply before continuing your story.

"At some point I asked him why he didn't spend as much time with me and why he stopped putting effort in our relationship and he simply said that I was overreacting and it wasn't at all like that. I guess... for a long while I settled for the bare minimun with him. And then for even less."

"He started gaslighting me all the time and I hated it, but I couldn't bring myself to leave because I still cared about him. And I hoped that deep down he was still the same lovely boy I fell for. But I guess it was hopeless..."

Fyodor listened to every word you said, violet eyes fixated on your features. He searched for any sign of hatred or resentment, but no, you talked about your ex so nonchalantly.

"And how do you think this relationship affected you?" he asked eventually

"I guess... I know my worth now. I won't accept that type of behaviour from anyone now. Although I don't think I'll face these problems with you. You're an amazing boyfriend" you said sweetly, a smile rising to your wine stained lips.

Despite your positive attitude, Fyodor's mind was haunted by dark thoughts. It may have been the effect of the alcohol, but for the first time in a long while he reflected upon himself:

He was a first class terrorist who has killed multiple men with his bare hands, who has deceived and manipulated countless of people without feeling any remorse.

And yet... you thought he was a good man; although you were aware of his crimes. The faith you had in him was like a punch to the gut, a reminder that he had to truly be good for you.

"Myshka" he said softly, setting his half empty glass on the floor before gently taking your hand in his, cold fingers holding tightly on your own. "You know I would never dare to do such a thing to you. I love you too much. And I know I'm not a good man for I have sinned more than anyone else, but I will always treat you right because you deserve the best."

"I know love" you chuckled, giving his hand a reassuring squeeze. "I don't doubt you."

Your words swirled around his foggy mind as he smiled gently and leaned in, placing a chaste kiss on your forehead.

"I know" he replied before nuzzling his head in the crook of your neck. "Thanks for that"

"Of course" you said back as wrapped your arms around his lanky frame, feeling him relax in your embrace.

You relished this affectionate moment, the way he just let go and allowed himself to be soft for you and once again, were grateful for your boyfriend's low alcohol tolerance.

#bsd #bungou stray dogs #bsd x reader #bsd fluff #bsd kunikida #kunikida doppo #kunikida x reader #fyodor bsd #fyodor x reader #bsd fyodor #fyodor dostoyevsky bsd #akutagawa x reader #bungo stray dogs akutagawa #kunikida x you #bsd akutagawa #fyodor x you #akutagawa x you #poor kunikida

242 notes · View notes

derinthescarletpescatarian · 1 year

Text

When pruning your herb garden you must NOT accidentally a caterpillar in healf, he is just going about his day.

337 notes · View notes

onebraincell-itmiebcraft · 11 days

Text

Liveblogging real life part 2: Joel (it's been 12 13 days) (already watched)

Okay so maybe we'll do the liveblog-every-five-minutes-unless-something-crazy thing also idk if I should link this up to my intro post (idk how) or reblogged my og one with this oh well we'll figure it out why am I eating AGAIN doing this

I got inspired after rewatching secret life my beloved for the umpteenth time :P

Okay ep. 1/finale is hilarious and new "series" 😭

Joel why did you point out the cursor I can't take my eyes away

First batch

Joel jumping then immediately keeling over in nausea:

Idk how to respond to that but it struck a chord within me, how true

BigB wholesome waving but it also looks like his arm is BENT I can't get over VR arms man 😭

Punching BigB because he's so tall is so real tbh + love the smash cut to Gem being salty

Headpatting + baby-ish voice "little gem/Ren/skizz" what a gentleman makes me think of the try not to cry challenge or Jimmy's crazy christmas series where he says Joel is a crybaby and Gem says he's a romance guy in a mental gymnastics train of thought

Grian throwing his head back from the outside?! Cryptid behaviour

The real life vids don't make me motion sick but Joel making retching and vomiting sounds does NOT help it makes me sick by proxy or something I hate being disoriented and nauseous too buddy

There's probably a video out there of someone comparing regular mc to vr because vr just hits different like proportions wise

Joel noises

Love this Joel-Gem duo already idk how to describe it just fun

Also Joel having to process out loud he won't throw up on Gem I remember playing Richie's plank experience or whatever years and years ago shit was REAL

Joel's inventory becoming disorganized with things that can be stacked together :(

Hey what gem said kinda reminds me of what grian said :D at the end of his episode awful :DD

Poor Joel he's battling his height complex alongside his motion sickness (rip bozo poor little meow meow)

I think almost everybody had the problem of facing the wall dude, it's okay it's very silly

Water foreshadowing (he will swim with his future gang and become incredibly sick)

Geminislay that pig

Wait till Joel learns about lying down‼️‼️

JOEL STOP MAKING NAUSEOUS SOUNDS I'M GONNA FROW UP 👹

"...Falling in powdered snow" kinda reminds me of this short story I read in grade 9 English class "The Bamboo Trap" protag fell in The Bamboo Trap™ and got bitten by big ass spiders or something the idiot, also I think got published in the same anthology as the most dangerous game 👊

Joel admits to weakness

Weird ass snow, someone built this or something?

Joel with his arms out looks so silly, so does gem

Oh gem how graceful with the figure skating history 👊👊👊✌️👉✌️✌️🤜🤛🤛🤜🙏

Lol they learn about the wrist chat

Second batch

Jimmy, oh iconic Timmy

Shield (why did I write this again?)

Bi shoes, love seeing gem's skin wearing the bi shoes I forget about it every once in a while and when I see it again it's a pleasant surprise

Vr players learn to pvp

When you use the shield to block in first person it looks kinda stupid dude

Campsite vibes tbh, I really like it.

Bee spotted 🐝🐝🐝🐝🐝🐝🐝🐝🐝🐝🐝🐝 what is it doing

Shaky controller cursor over top chest plate I feel you

Falling irl indeed (recursive mention about plank)

LOUD holy moly Joel is loud (not negative)

Healf being something people can't look at at all times is actually a kinda funny mechanic

Smajor friendship aww when will they team up (did I forget about a series)

The poor beg for bread, we live in a society ✊😔

Grian killing??? Since when??? (Sarcastic)

Batch three

Peace and love is why they haven't died yet 😘

Arms again! Weird looking things

Hand gesture reminds me of that one diamond scar short with etho's greedy "I want the diamond" voice

Flint and steel? Weird looking thing

Omg red club looks like bugs, the way the trio gossips about them ♥️

Right no out messages...

Can't believe the most motion sick man gets in the water not once but TWICE this ep

Does he know

Where did the horse thing come from

Can't remember if I mentioned this but when the sword swings without critting in VR it looks so silly it pokes

A bugs life: the sequel

Club: deadly euphemism

Sword 😐

Something about jimmy doesn't get burnt...

Why is Jimmy jiggles the only one with a wooden sword???

Strong words from a man on the verge of mania 👀

Lol knowing impulse breaks the ground under Joel big brain man going for the kill

Something about the disappointed way Joel says "scar!" And scar stabbing him in the first caused this

Tim is so British he says "get in" so much

Joel, again exasperated, cries out "where's all my stuff?!"

Funny Minecraft men, my favourite funny Minecraft men

My god seeing from Joel's perspective his second death is from zombie

I think Joel was about to saying bluming + the cover behind house + the constant begging for his stuff back + violence as an answer (he hits men)

Oh scar up to no good again

JOEL GETS IN THE WATER AGAIN!!! MOTION SICKNESS WIN!

Joel and scar just did mitosis stop being scared of biology 🙄

What was Mr solidaritygaming doing in that hill and said yes to did he finally get iron?

Aw the silly arm motion I love greeting people with spirit fingers reminds me of that

GOON SQUAD?! (neuron activated)

Famous moment

Oh more famous moment here comes the smallidarity kiss

Love Tim's body language once again the sharp smooth head turn to grian he's like a cartoon character

(what grian mean they are suited and booted he cut this part out I don't remember the other povs 😢)

Leave it to solidaritygaming himself to be the most homoerotic straight man there is of course + Joel is still patting him on the head? + Timsel being cringefail needing to jump multiple times on ONE BLOCK + Joel did NOT need to lean that much he looks like he's powered by springs + Jim's arms always being so tight together. Makes him. Look like. An old granny??? + Joel IMMEDIATELY checking his wrist afterwards like it's a Tuesday and he's on break + homophobic GRIAN + impulse's dad delivery one liner

The more I watch smallidarity kiss the more bizarre and asinine it becomes to me 😀

When did Joel learn to button jump (he WAS mental for jumping irl irl)

Okay Joel cut out that canary comment why don't you 🙄🙄🙄

WHACK 💀 SHAKE YOUR HANDS REAL FAST 💀💀 JOEL SCREAM #3997 💀💀💀

Fond of Joel's cadence of saying "hello guys!" And "I'm coming in boys!" And "HAHA!" oddly musical

Okay aaaaaaand he dies worst ranking ever good for him the end

Idk if I should liveblog scar next or watch Ren because I've already watched up to skizz + me 'ead 'urts oh well

#real life smp #real life spoilers #real life #rlsmp #rl #rlmblr #rlsmp liveblogging #am i the only one using that tag #smallishbeans #liveblogging

8 notes · View notes