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#for his sake and for the sake of everyone he cares about
satellitespinner · 3 days
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✼ mommy issues .. (one)
a/n: oh did you think this was gonna be a cute lil fluff fic? nahh it’s sad city down there!! be careful..
content warnings: ANGST panic attacks.. hurt (no comfort.) joel is dead. ellie’s a lil sad :/// ellie’s a lil anxious… ellie’s a projection of me.. ANYWAYS. reader and ellie are kinda the same but different ??? swearing ofc.. reader is very much okay with being a lesbian ! and she’s on good terms with the baby fawtha cause what! ellie is not fond of children apparently?? she also might be autistic.
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wc: 2k.
taglist: @flowersforvi @diddiqueen @ellslvr @saturnsdrafts @3lli3l0v3r @williamssgirl @liasxeatt @adelaide013 @a-little-bit-of-everybody @elliessweetheart @pedropascalsbbg @ellies2missingfingers @nelzooo @r3starttt @jaeminpookie @onlinelesbo @tphmnv @p4ison1vy @pascals-doll @snowy-vee @diddiqueen
ellie grew up around masculinity, thats why people assume she is the way she is. but ellie can assure that her brain would work the exact same way if she had a mother.
plus, she had joel. that was really all she needed. she still knew how to be a woman. it’s not like she grew up without a mother and didn’t know anything about herself.
2 WEEKS AND 4 DAYS AGO..
ellie sighed and threw the white stained towel over her shoulder. fuck she muttered under her breath as she read yet another email.
ATTENTION STUDENTS!
You will all be required to purchase the following textbooks in order to complete the course - They will help immensely in the upcoming exam. I recommend reading carefully and thoroughly.
Sincerely,
Prof Morgan.
all 5 of the books linked in the email were over $150.00 each. how the fuck was she supposed to work that out? all while paying her own tuition, rent and utilities.
“yo, williams!” her manager jesse yelled, interrupting her calculations.
“breaks over.” he snatches the towel from her shoulder and makes his way back into the kitchen with it in tow.
she scoffs and shoves her phone back into her polyester pocket. jesse’s head pops back into the room “oh and” he starts before turning to her. “you’re training today” she scoffs and lifts herself off the chair.
“is that even in my job description?” she follows him out of the kitchen once again.
“sure it is, i just described it to you.” he winks, ellie huffs.
the sky had dimmed by the time ellies shift was over. skating home was gonna be a bitch.
“you need a ride home?” dina places a hand atop her shoulder, a helpful smile on her face. ellie really wanted to say no. she’s been asking for help from others so much lately.
“no, uhh- i’ll get home t’night. thanks dee.” she nods as she grabs her skateboard from her locker. have the trucks always been this lose?
“no, i insist.” dina presses. she pulls out her keys and throws her bag over her shoulder.
“let’s go, my child.” she giggles at the nickname. ellies shoulders relax.
“thanks again, i really appreciate it.” ellie said, her tone laced with genuine gratitude. dina dismisses her with a hand flick. “don’t even sweat it.” she bragged. “now get goin, it’s late.”
ellie pushes the car door open with a steady grip on her skateboard. her smile falters as she waves dina off.
she unlocks her door with a trembling hand, she hated being alone.
the picture of her and joel neatly placed beside the coat rack mocked her as she placed her skateboard down in its dedicated spot. she stared into the picture until the colors morphed into one big glob.
the loss of not just a parent, but her only parent cut her deep. she could barely lift her head for the first while, nevermind go to work. she should be proud of herself! but she isn’t.
how could she be? she felt like everyone else in her life was doing so much with themselves. dina had a kid for fucks sake! dina had a whole kid and ellie couldn’t even get to class on time.
“fuck.” she muttered as she placed her keys down. bills upon bills were flooding the kitchen counter. tears burned at her eyes, blurring her eyesight.
i look so pathetic right now. she thought. a slight chuckle leaving her throat at that.
she tried to blink back the tears but she couldn’t, they just kept coming.
her silent whimpers quickly turned to snotty sobs as her chest heaved in and out involuntarily. she placed a heavy hand on her heart as she slid down the kitchen cabinet. soon enough she found herself completely breathless and wailing.
she eventually calmed herself through deep breaths and a cold glass of water. as she does through every panic attack, although the melancholic feeling always lingered.
after joels death ellie could never find herself truly happy. especially not in an environment where he was everything, everytime she turned around she was reminded of the man who wasn’t even her real father.
nothing was really hers.
she made her way down the dark, dusty hallway to her bedroom. desks adorned with pictures of her and joel. she ignored them this time.
she stripped of her uniform and took to the shower. the water burning her skin till it turned red. she scrubbed harshly at her scalp and body. she smelt like grease. gross.
the after shower feeling made her feel a bit better. she grabbed her toothbrush and rinsed it before wiping a glob of colgate toothpaste on the bristles and shoving it in her mouth.
ellie chased sleep for what felt like an eternity. her damp hair scratching at her neck was definitely a part of the problem.
thank god she didn’t work saturdays..
the first 30 seconds of ellie’s day were complete bliss, usually. but not today.
today ellie woke up to the obnoxious sound of a child crying. she decided right then and there that the universe hates her and wants her to die. (but she thinks that about everyone in her life..)
she scoffs and walks over to the curtains, her own padded feet already annoying her.
she peeks out the curtain only to be met with a u-haul and an suv parked in the driveway next door.
new neighbors, how wonderful. and they had a whiny kid! perfect.
she continues watching out the window until she sees you hand off the kid to its father. her eyes follow you until you step into the u-haul and start dragging boxes out. that’s when she sighs and decides to get ready for the day. even though she doesn’t want to.
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your entire life you were desperate to be equal. to be taken seriously. you craved maturity.
you spent your entire childhood chasing adulthood. you were desperate to grow up. you didn’t know it then, but you would regret it.
the one thing you didn’t regret, was felix. the baby that you got out of your last relationship. that was before you realized you were very much a lesbian..
“cmon baby, just put your shoe on.” you struggled against the child in the backseat as he wailed. the sound was excruciating.
“please- can you just let mommy put your shoe on?” you gritted as you attempted to shove the shoe onto her other foot.
“no!” he screamed, almost directly into your face. that was it.
“you know what? fuck it.” you muttered the last words under your breath. truthfully you already weren’t setting a good example, but hey! let not say fuck infront of our kid!
you gave up on the shoes and shushed him gently as you undid his seatbelt from his car seat. you placed him in the arms of his father, tossing the shoe into his dinosaur covered backpack.
he slowly came down from his tantrum as he placed his head on his dads shoulder.
“you sure you don’t need me to help unpack?” your ex asks, unsure of leaving you behind with an entire house to furnish.
“yep! i’m good!” you smile. you gently kiss your baby’s forehead before shutting your car door.
the father nods in response. “just text if you need and we will be here. isn’t that right felix?” he asks the child who nods profusely.
“of course mama!” he shouts causing you and his dad to laugh. “well alright then!” you rush, it was still early but you were eager to get to your gardening before dark.
you watch as your ex buckles the kid in and situated himself in the car, before pulling out of the driveway he rolls down felixs window.
you blow kisses as the pull out of the driveway and take off to ‘the old house’ in your sons words.
as soon as the car is out of sight you make your way over to the U-Haul.
you’re so focused on getting this last box out of the truck that you don’t even feel the presence creep up behind you.
“hey did you need some hel-”
“what the fuck!”
you jump in fear before turning around. being faced with a red headed, green eyed girl.
“oh my god, i’m so sorry.” she apologizes calmly. an awkward look on her face as you stare at her wide eyed.
you chuckle lightly before putting your hands on your hips. “it’s alright, hon.” you reassure.
you two just awkwardly stare at eachother for a few seconds before ellie finally speaks up again.
“i saw you struggling. did you want some help?” she asks. her eyes drifting to the box filled with gardening tools.
“oh that would be amazing!” you said before wiping the sweat of your forehead.
ellies eyes follow a droplet of seat down your neckline all the way down your cleavage. she finds herself licking her lips
before you introduce yourself.
she darts her eyes back up to your own, praying that you didn’t see her blatantly check you out. “i’m- i’m ellie.” she jumps over her words.
since when did you not know how to speak, idiot? she internally face palms before walking over to pick up the box.
“where do you want this?” she asks with a grunt as she steadys the box in her arms.
“just over here” you direct, letting her follow you as you walked over to the side of the house. she follows you and sets the box down with ease. she jokingly wipes the dirt off of her hands before nodding and starting to walk off.
“oh sweetie! i don’t wanna be a bother but would you mind helping me with one more thing?”
you must’ve been magic because somehow you swindled ellie into helping you with almost everything, and she was totally fine with it.
currently you were both at your kitchen island, laughing over a bottle of wine.
ellie had confided in you about school and you had rambled to her about what it’s like to be a mother.
“yeah, i mean- besides pregnancy it’s not all that bad.” you admit. ellie’s face shifts at the mention of pregnancy.
“i don’t know if i could ever have a baby inside me. i think i’d like- die.?” she questions. “not that i would of course” she giggles. your face becomes a look of confusion.
“no boyfriend? or just not one for kids?” you ask. you totally forgot that it’s very possible for her to be-
“i’m a lesbian” she answers and takes another sip of wine. her eyes watching your face for any negative reaction.
you clap your hands over your mouth quickly. now it seems obvious.
“i am so sorry, that totally slipped my mind.” she laughs at your attempts to redeem yourself.
“it’s totally chill, don’t worry.” she reassures, a smile on her face.
“i am too, actually.” you admit, it was your first time admitting it to someone other than yourself of your now ex husband.
“oh i was just gonna ask if that was your husband out there earlier.” she fidgets with the rings on her fingers as she asks.
“well, ex. it’s not easy to find a baby sitter that actually takes care of my kid these days.” you admit to her. she ponders for a slight moment before speaking up again.
“well, if you’re looking. i’m usually free during the day, i work nights most of the time.” she offers up. she wasn’t really sure why. she wasn’t even a fan of kids.
“really?!” it looks like your eyes had bulged out of your head. “god that would be amazing! i’ll pay you!”
ellie didn’t hear anything besides ‘i’ll pay you’ that’s all she needed to know.
“yeah of course. i’ll take him.” she confirmed.
that night ellie left with your phone number and a smidge of hope in her heart.
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mochinomnoms · 1 day
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Does all of Coral Sea know of Floyd and Jades future mates? Cause I was wondering if they made a public “announcement ” of them to where maybe others know now not to get too close or else potentially suffer under their wrath. Or is it a more only family friends/family know like in Tony, Azul and Aspens case?
-🧀anon
Hmm, I'm assuming this is referencing PTM right? No, they don't announce it. Really, they don't mean for the people closest to them to be aware of their feelings. But it's quite noticible when one of the twins gets a crush.
Floyd will talk a lot about something once it's caught his interest. My people with the tism will understand, it's like when you get a hyperfixation and can't stop thinking or talking about it? Floyd's like that. When the others hear him gush about Riddle, about how funny he is, how small and cute he is, how Riddle kicked his ass their first meeting, everyone just assumed he would lose interest within a few weeks. Maybe months even. But Floyd's interest in Riddle has persisted…much longer than anything else he's ever been interested in. And his comments become less teasing and more soft, talking about how cool Riddle looked riding his horse, how he changed his tie into a bow, how he's been eating more sweets like tarts as of late. Then it turns into, "didja know that Goldfishie really likes strawberries? He just eats them up!" or "Goldfishie's real smart, I bet I could get away with asking him to tutor me to hang out. Nah I don't need it, I just want to mess with him." or even "I saw Goldfishie in the infirmary the other day, he was sleeping. He looks really pretty, peaceful like that." But the real thing that made everyone realize that there was something more is when he started referring to Riddle by name in his comments. Actual names are reserved for people he actually cares about, people that he would want to make an effort for to know them and their names. Just like how Azul is Azul, not Lil Octy, Riddle is Riddle, not just Goldfishie in his eyes.
Jade is surprisingly less subtle. It might be because be doesn't normally rant to people about his fixations, only going off in tangents once in a while. So when he starts talking about Yuu, it's immediately noticeable. More so when he doesn't shut up about them. The difference between Floyd and Jade is that Jade is aware that the others know, Floyd thinks he's being slick with it. It's why Jade can take teasing from the others relatively well, he knows they know and is mostly fine with it. At least until one of them attempts to get involved for his sake. Floyd and Azul have offered to fabricate scenarios, make comments, and help push Yuu to him. Usually in exchange for him doing something, or to stop growing his mushrooms in certain areas of the dorm. Aspen and Tony are the opposite, Aspen especially willing to get Yuu into scenarios that would make them unattractive or unavailable in Jade's eyes. Most recently, this we see this in the last chapter when Aspen is pushing Wynfred to go out with Yuu. Jade's not happy about it, Yuu is embarrassed, and Aspen is just trying his best to get Jade for himself. Tony eventually gets dragged into any trouble that Aspen gets himself into, willingly or not. Though, he is prone to gossip with Floyd and listen to his rambles about Riddle. He's surprisingly insightful, though that would require Floyd to listen to his advice.
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pigidin · 3 days
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OKAY. Am I the only one fascinated by how much Alastor in s1 has interacted with other demons and built a potential for considerable amount of different, broad and unique relationships? With All of them being non-romantic/sexual?
I really don't wanna dive into the discourse of shipping coz honestly, I do think that erasing Al's aroaceness is not cool at all. Personally, I don't see him wishing any romance/sex at all, and well. Considering how platonic he actually is throughout the season, it kinda seems like people forget that friendship (or basically anything non rom-sex) exists in the first place.
Coz, like, let's see what we got::
Vox -- probably one-sided (psychosexual) crush from Vox with possible past friendship between them, them hating on each other yet having (used to have) some respect as well. The ANGST, the drama (for both of sides). Insert aroace troubles (possible aphobia from Vox? Or not? He may be biggest ally as well!) and Vox's petty feelings that are insanely interesting to explore (and laugh at).
Lucifer -- immediate hate that (with a course of events) can turn into forced bonding. The potential of queerplatonic parenting of Charlie is HUGE here. Insecurities from Al? Forced care? Banters? SHENANIGANS? Luci patching up Al after battle, prolly discovering his deal and them slowly bonding on shared interests? Hey.
Rosie -- literal established queerplatonic partners, married for tax benefits, spending their evenings gossiping, hating on Susan and Al rolling his eyes on another romance-rel drama Rosie was trying to help sb with. Rosie can have insane influence on him whether it is understanding modern things or just being with him when he needs it. It also gives off mom/son to me.
Husk -- fucked up master-pet not-friendship with probable care rooted since they were closer in past. Is it toxic? Yes. Is it giving off some problematic dynamic? Sure. Yet it's fucking complex on its core considering pilot, bits and pieces of their interaction and how easily Husk used to insult Al until he overstepped. Them two are quite similar if you think about it and if Al got over his ego it could benefit him a lot.
Niffty -- daugther/father dynamic with them sharing one sadistic-psycho braincell and genuinely enjoying each other's quirks. Protective Al? I just need more Niff and them two being partners in the most outrageous crimes.
Mimzy -- friendship going since they were humans, with them having an amazing (potential) backstory of sharing evenings on two. Al enjoying her company as well as being protective and helpful to her with nothing in return.
Charlie -- manipulated into trusting you as a dad figure? Don't tell me there is nothing below Al's creepy plans or that he wouldn't grow to care for her. He already is proud of her and finds amusement in her inspiration-skills (also, performance is his thing for a reason)
Angel -- I was honestly kinda upset we didn't see any interactions between them except one sex joke, coz my past era of Hunicasts was a fuel to their duo. Them bonding over how different they are is the best description of their dynamic. Also banters and body-puns.
You can't just erase Alastor from interacting with people, but putting him inside boxes of allonormative relationships while he has such a fucking huge potential for everything beyond just that - is quite.. disappointing. People turning a blind eye to a wide variety of relationships he can have (potential to which is set in canon) for the sake of just romance/sex is low key sad.
It's AWESOME to see ppl actually understanding it and.. damn THANKS to everyone who explores Al's relationship with others without it involving final wish to stick tongues into places. Dynamics can be interesting and exciting without it.
I really don't wanna project my romance-aversion onto Al, but when romance and sex is one thing you see everywhere.. it's hard to just let it slip.
You are allowed to do whatever you want, exploring physical intimacy is fun as well, and having Al, well, there are bunch of ways to show it with respecting his orientation and the fact that IT AFFECTS RELATIONSHIPS/ATTRACTIONS but please just don't make it the center of your attention, the one thing relationship revolves around, coz sadly it's just exactly how it looks like from some folks.
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thedemonscrawler · 17 hours
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I'm just gonna do this to Ruin
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LIKE. YES I KNOW HE DID EVERYTHING WRONG. BUT HAVE YOU CONSIDERED HOW SAD HE MIGHT BE ABOUT IT
Like aaaaa I'm cursed to only like characters when they're losing I guess, and a Pyrrhic victory counts as a loss. I didn't CARE about this guy when he was the main antagonist, and then Eclipse 3.0 chucked him in the back of a car and kidnapped him and I was suddenly interested. And NOW, when everyone is very much upset about Solar, I'm off to the side shaking this bastard around because we finally got some concrete answers to what's going on in his head.
Just! This whole thing-- this is an exceptionally Moon thing for him to have done. To go 'I'm going to completely and totally remove this possible threat from ever occurring, and I'm fine with being the bad guy to do it'? That's some Old Moon kind of thinking. This wasn't a plan he came up with in the past few months, this took him years.
And speaking of years! Fifty years of playing pretend! Of acting like you enjoy hurting people, that you don't care as your body literally falls apart around you. I'm not a fan of the idea that he was never infected, I like the perspective better that he was infected, it just wasn't as responsible for his behavior as he made it out to be-- but still. At some point he had to have gone numb to it for the sake of his own survival.
What does that do to your mentality? Your outlook? What's it like knowing that your whole world was brought to its knees by your creator? What's it like being the only semi-stable person you know for half a century? What's it like realizing that you're also changing, and not for the better?
He's just... so painfully isolated, in a way that Eclipse doesn't even come close to touching.
And! And even after being 'cured'! He's still isolated! Like it was a good thing he WAS up to something-- can you imagine how crushing it would be if he'd been genuinely not doing anything, and he was still treated with suspicion for a solid like 4 months? By probably the most consistent group of animatronics he's had to talk to that weren't infected with a weird virus?
Like, the man didn't get repaired until 3 months after being cured, after Solar made a blueprint in his spare time. He didn't get a bed until Moon felt guilty about rummaging around inside his head-- and tbh I don't know if he ever got to actually use that bed. He let them call him Ruin.
Ruin never had a home in 'our' dimension.
And hhhhngh like I'm not even sure he cares, because he's past the point of caring. He's got one of Sun's worst traits as well, "There's no point in sharing what I'm thinking because no one is listening". He could have approached Moon and Solar with like "Hey okay so I started on this plan to do this thing like 10 years ago, I would like some input" and maybe an alternative could have been found!
But he didn't, because he's alone. He came up with the best plan he could, weighed the risks, and acted on it, all by himself. A single weird Eclipse against 5,000 Creators, because he felt like that was the greatest threat.
And like, lets be real-- Solar's death was 100% a narrative necessity. Otherwise we the audience wouldn't really care that Ruin had wiped so many dimensions from existing, it'd just be a number. That thing of like, you gotta make it personal to have impact. Very good storytelling right there.
(Though from a in-universe perspective, man it must have been an unpleasant shock to learn that of course the only other dimensional refugee was from one of the worlds you had to destroy. Like, come on, what are the odds)
He did something horrible. A multi-dimensional catastrophe to prevent a multi-dimensional catastrophe. He probably accepted the ramifications of it ages ago. He just... utterly lacks any hope, you know? No hope of forgiveness, no hope of improvement. He survived his world long enough to do this thing, and he has nothing else going for him.
He's just waiting for them to finally kill off his body, because he already died years ago.
Anyway I'm desperately trying to find an angle that can be used to maybe pull him out of his coffin here and so far I'm not seeing one qq but maybe future eps will give me something to work off of.
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violetlunette · 20 hours
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If instead of Idia, it was your Yuu who got captured as Eliza's groom, who would come to his rescue (assuming he is unable to save himself)? I can see Lilia volunteering if it means Silver won't be going lol
(referencing this series)
Oh boy, what was Eliza drinking to wanna kidnap Yuu, who looks like a rubber-hose man? (Oh, that reminds me; I need to finish his new look.)
Believe it or not, a lot of people would want to help him, in my canon anyway:
Silver would go no matter what Lilia said. While Silver’s unsure of his feelings, he does know he cares about Yuu. Lilia would go for Silver’s sake (and he does care about Yuu in his own way).
Malleus would want to help his friend but would be convinced to remain behind with Sebek, as a Prince can’t act as he pleases.
Grim, Ace, and Deuce would volunteer right after Silver, along with the Ramshackle ghosts. Yuu may be a madman, but he’s their madman.
Riddle may go to help his underclassmen, and Trey would go for the same reason.
Rook would be inspired by everyone’s devotion and volunteer as well.
Jack and Epel, who are sorta of Yuu’s buddies, would help too.
Kalim would try, but Jamil would force him back.
And finally—to everyone’s surprise—Azul would offer his services along with the Leech twins as they would want Yuu to be indebted to them.
(If the rest went, it would be because someone activated a black hole machine, and they dunno how to turn it off without Yuu.)
When the plan is put into action it almost succeeds as Eliza immediately falls for Silver. However, Yuu messes it up by refusing to let Silver marry her. (Btw, Yuu thought he was planning a wedding this whole time, not getting married. When he realizes this is the case, he politely but firmly rejects Eliza. [He may be interested in the sex out of curiosity, but otherwise...])
A fight breaks out but is stopped by Silver, who appeals to everyone with an impassioned speech that reaches Eliza and the ghosts. She gets together with her guards and leaves the students behind.
Later, Yuu thanks Silver for the rescue. He states that Silver looks wonderful in the suit before inquiring if Silver has an answer to his proposal. Silver—who was asleep during that incident—is confused. Then Lilia appears and states that they should take the opportunity to celebrate. He volunteers to cook, and Silver suddenly has other things on his mind, lol.
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urlocalrambler · 2 days
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devils night: unpopular opinion: michael crist edition.
michael was actually such a bad friend if you really think about it. this is so ironic because his character is built off the fact that he's diehard for his friends to the point of having insane loyalty to them. he's supposed to be loyal to the point where he chooses to torment rika for that friendship's sake, to the level where he struggles with choosing love/rika over the guys in corrupt.
but like,, he was also so rubbish as a friend and person. it may have been due to oversight and PD not thinking about the overarching relationships that clearly, but c'mon, michael escaped prison while his friends were sent in and has huge guilt over this...
yet, he never once thinks to help damon's sister, who he KNOWS exists and who he knows would be SUFFERING in a house run by big, bad gabriel torrance. he knows his best friend is in jail, that she was the only family damon cared about to the point of keeping her under wraps and hidden away from everyone, and yet, michael never reaches out or tries to help banks??
and michael also knows kai is agonising over her in hideaway, they're actively against damon at this time and he has this top secret info to his name, yet he never thinks to tell kai who banks really is. everyone (including PD) uses the argument michael minds his own business, but no he fucking doesn't, if he did then he never would've messed with nik back during devils night or threatened her at the hotel.
the fact is that we should've either gotten a humanising moment/mention of michael actually being sweet for once in his life, and see him at least keeping an eye on banks if not reaching out while damon was in prison (although, i think it would've been a great platonic bonding scene if he had sought her out before the events of hideaway even if it's just to offer her an out that she may not take, or to simply ask how she is). OR, michael perving on banks that one night, him discovering she's damon's sister– that whole thread should've been omitted because it honestly made no sense to me and just made me dislike michael even more.
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katshuya · 3 days
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Rhaegar's wife, who had delicate health, gave him two children. One caused her to be bedridden for half a year and another that he impregnated her with during her recovery or, immediately after and almost killed her, deserved that crown.
Yes she deserved it more than Lyanna Stark who braverly defended her father's bannerman yet impulsively and naively when there was a well known mad king watching and entered as a mystery knight that grabbed everyone's curiosity for being unknown.
Elia Martell, who endured Rhaegar, his prophecy, racist people, and their opinion about how unworthy she was for him AND his racist, mad cruel father desrved respect as well as that crown.
Yet she was gifted with humiliation one after another after all that she sacrificed.
This will trigger many. But that crown was Elia's right after all the hell this strong woman has been through. Not Lyanna's. Yet, in the narrative, it is all about Lyanna and the winter rose.
Rhaegar only endangered Lyanna, and even if Aerys and Lyanna's family and betrothed weren't there, it was still Elia's right.
Honoring Lyanna could have been done more respectfully and wiser, yet it was extremely dumb and cruel.
Yet the audacity to put Elia in such a humiliating situation
She deserves more respect and attention from GRRM, which I doubt he will grant her any true respect.
Elia was killed for the sake of the narrative. So the promised one can happen. She was used and then killed in an unnecessary way for it.
What even happened to Elia's body along with her children's? Definitely weren't sent to Dorne. While we know Rhaegar's was burnt and Lyanna's in winterfell.
If George wanted us to like the Rhaegar x lyanna thing, then he failed miserably. For sane people, of course.
This will always be where he failed the writing.
We hear of Lyanna's suffering in the books, and how she was killed to bring important child for the future of the realm and its safety yet we barely hear of Elia's, who gave and suffered much, much more.
I like the Starks, but this is where George crossed the line with his favoursim.
She is barely there in the narrative, yet her story and the things she had been through and everything associated with her upbringing make her more interesting character than Rhaegar or Lyanna to me and many people.
I believe George unintentionally made her more interesting to many of us when he wanted us to care for Rhaegar and Lyanna.
Edit: I'm talking about the crown, not the winter rose itself. Since some Rx L shippers entered the asks and were acting so unruly like usual.
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heretherebedork · 3 days
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I agree 100% with your analysis on Jihan and Ahjeong dating in public. You can acknowledge that they thought they wouldn’t get caught dating in public because they didn’t think anyone knew who they were while also acknowledging that they are extremely stupid for thinking that way. They’re perfectly aware that Dohan is being watched but somehow don’t think for a single second that they could also be watched? I understand they didn’t follow that logic but I can also say they are idiots for thinking that. I don’t think either of them are bad people but they are incredibly stupid and reckless and have been since the beginning when they got drunk and were a second away from spilling everything to the grandpa in the taxi. It’s not a crime to acknowledge that like some people seem to think it is. It’s not even saying Dohan has never been selfish while everyone else only thinks of themselves, but it just feels so uneven because Dohan has so much more to lose than anyone else. I look at reactions on multiple social media platforms so I’m not sure what is said where, but seeing people say that Dohan should out himself publicly to save Jihan and Ahjeong’s relationship just makes me feel like I’m going crazy. Seeing everyone act like Jihan has done nothing but give up everything he wants for the sake of Dohan makes me feel crazy. Seeing people act like Ahjeong was forced to marry Dohan against her will makes me feel crazy. I feel like I’m watching a different show than everyone else lol.
I cannot imagine people saying that Ah Jeong is being forced into this marriage. She agreed! She even had time to think it over, originally rejected it and then came back to it after Ji Han pissed her off. This is not something Do Han threatened her into or forced onto her. Ugh. I hope to never see that on my dash here.
But, yeah.
I was annoyed at both of them since the date at the movie festival early on. That was in a hugely public and well photographed place filled with the media and Ji Han just went and took his brother's fiance there and took her back to a hotel room together in front of a famous actress? And nothing ever came of that?! Still annoyed.
It's not that they're bad people, though I might argue they are. But it's more that they are truly being assholes to Do Han. What has Ji Han given up for Do Han?! He chose this path and then he tried to do everything in his power to destroy their marriage when he thought it was real!
Ji Han says he wants Do Han to be happy but what he really wants is for Do Han to be his idea of happy. Ji Han wants Do Han to lead the life Ji Han pictures for him, the life of marrying and working in this business and having a wife and power. That's all. And that's not truly wanting someone to be happy. that's wanting someone else to lead the life you don't lead.
Truthfully, Ji Han is so selfish but because he disguises it as caring about Do Han it doesn't feel selfish. But has he ever truly considered what Do Han wants? Or is just what Ji Han has decided Do Han wants every single time?
He accuses Do Han of being selfish with his choice but all Ji Han has ever done is encourage Do Han to give up his dreams and follow Ji Han's dreams instead.
Ah Jeong is, frankly, just a failure of writing. She is so close to being a good friend and the show could have made her one if it hadn't been so determined to write her in a Certain Way.
(Remember when she made a joke with Ji Han's coworkers about bringing his clothing back to him at work and how she implied they were lovers to, again, all of Ji Han's coworkers after she knew how powerful Do Han's family was and all his secrets? I remember.)
I'm very glad to be avoiding the mainstream discussion on this show. I'll just sit in my little corner and defend Do Han.
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ovaryacted · 1 day
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hello,
can I, like, ask for Chris in a wedding first dance scenario?
doesn't have to be long, I'd love it if you could write it with Because The Night or Total Eclipse Of The Heart in mind 🥺🥺
OMGGG STOP. The first dance at his wedding, oh I'll sob. Somebody, please get this man in a suit (for me duh). Thank you for this ask, I'll feed into this lovely idea, and for the record, I did listen to both songs and thought Total Eclipse of The Heart fit more. <3
-
The seasons were starting to change, right on the cusp of summer turning into fall. The sun beamed brightly, the temperature warm enough to not need additional layers but a soft breeze limited the chances of the day being scorching. The right time to get married, at least that was what you two originally thought when going over the details with the wedding planner.
After a long time waiting to tie the knot with the man you loved and adored, Chris snagged a few months of leave to fully enjoy his wedding and honeymoon, not having to stress about missions and bioweapons. He was all yours for longer than you've had him home in probably ever, and you weren't going to complain not one bit.
The ceremony went off without a hitch, walking down the aisle with your bouquet of custom flowers and dressed in the finest and most expensive garment you've ever worn. Every intricate detail was woven to fit your body, a snug fit around your hips, and cutouts on other parts to show enough skin for it to be comfortable.
As you walked further down the aisle with everyone watching you closely, your gaze was drawn to the gentle brown eyes ahead. Chris stood with his hands folded over his body, his fitted black tux accentuating his physique in a way you‘ve never seen before. He offered you a nervous smile as you reciprocated, not being able to take his eyes off of you the entire time you walked towards him.
You noticed the tears that started to fall down his cheeks, feeling his love fill the entire room, like an overwhelming tide that washed over you the closer you got to him. He tried to keep it together for your sake, a chuckle from his sister Claire and a reassuring squeeze on his shoulder from his best man Leon brought him back to the moment. He didn’t want to embarrass you by crying in front of everyone, but he just couldn’t help himself.
You didn't even care for the officiant speaking out loud, the gentle hold of your hands in his own was all you could focus on. From the exchanging of vows to the first kiss as a newlywed couple, everything was perfect, down to every detail. The crowd cheered as the officiant finished speaking, walking down the steps and up the aisle with Chris’ hand in your own, squeezing it the entire way down.
The reception started soon after, spending the past couple of hours until then with your now husband, away from the crowd and decompressing before meeting everyone else. There were no other intentions towards meeting with him, simply enjoying some quiet time and being present before dancing the night away.
As you both walked into the dancing hall with your guests clapping and a few whistles, a spotlight was put on you both to signify the first dance as a married couple. Chris didn’t hesitate to bring you in towards him with a hand on your lower back, a live piano rendition of Total Eclipse of The Heart playing in the background.
He began to sway his body along yours on the dance floor, one of your hands on his shoulder while the other was being held upwards. You rested your head on his chest, ear against his heartbeat and feeling the rumble of every breath he took. Leaning his head against your own, he held you closely, thumb caressing the diamond that adorned your ring finger and humming the song so only you could hear it.
You smiled to yourself, tuning the whole world out and focusing on being here with Chris, on feeling and breathing him in. He was your person, always has been, and now he’s right where he belongs, with you by his side.
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sleepy-gee · 2 days
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☕️ stomachache - snowjanus week day 3
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☕️day 3: angst ☕️ Sejanus couldn't control much in his life, so he controlled what he could– What he ate, for example.
☕️ trigger warnings: eating disorders (anorexia/bullimia), arguments, lowkey stalking lol...
☕️ a/n: the cost of being my blorbo is becoming my punching bag. sorry sej. but anyway, as ms. gray stated, hunger is a weapon in panem.. so why not explore that?
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It was an awful, awful habit. Sejanus knew that. So why couldn’t he stop? That’s what he didn’t know.
Eating was a natural human right. Something that everyone should be able to do, free of charge and guilt. Hunger wasn’t meant to be used as a weapon, yet it was so effortlessly. It made him sick. Sick enough to not want to eat ever again. If others couldn’t eat, then why should he be able to? He was profiting off of that very fact alone. And he couldn’t do a single damn thing about it.
How was everyone so calm about this? Why was everyone so calm about this, too? Just because they couldn’t see it didn’t mean it didn’t exist. Their own ignorance and egos were causing thousands to starve. The Capitol was everyone’s government. It was supposed to keep everyone safe, keep everything in order. Yet they were letting their citizens starve. And they were okay with that? And the cherry on top of it all was that he was supposed to agree with this, fit in with these people and their ideals.
He couldn’t help. He couldn’t control anything about this. He was powerless
.But he could control what he ate.
It was twisted therapy. Destroy yourself for the sake of what? A little control? Making a pool of power for yourself because you’re tired of dipping your toes in others? It’s a lot easier said than done, though. Going against his own survival instincts and rewiring his own brain to deny one of the three essential things necessary to survive.
It felt good, though. Or so he kept telling himself. It was hard at first, changes like that always are. But after a few months? Food itself felt foreign.
The weight loss was just the cherry on top. Sejanus was a foodie. Everyone knew that, and it showed. If anything, it was supposed to be a good thing. It showed he was taken care of, he was able to eat. That was supposed to be a good thing, but after moving to the Capitol, he found out it wasn't. Pretty privilege existed, and it was potent. He'd found that out the hard way.
The rituals would kick in when life got stressful, and for a while, things wouldn't seem so bad.
It was wrong.. Very, very wrong.
But he had it under control.
So well under control, that no one noticed. He'd still accept meals and snacks.. Just throw them away later or save them for "later".
Or so he thought.
One head turned at his chaos, and that head belonged to Coriolanus Snow. The boy he considered his best friend. He knew his best friend was putting on a giant front most of the time, having his own issues with food– Another way of disposing his own– He didn't have enough, and that broke his heart. Even in the elite Capitol, people still went hungry.
...
Coriolanus was able to read the signs very, very easily and very well. From the way Sejanus would take deep breaths after climbing stairs to dipping his head for a moment to fight off the abyss after standing for too long.
Why was a Plinth boy of all people going hungry?
Coriolanus decided to conduct a mini investigation of his own– If the Plinth's were going hungry, then things must really be bad.
The investigation lasted around a month. The tricky part was he had to integrate the Plinth boy into his daily routine enough to observe him, and leave enough room to write him out when he got his results.
He started small, sitting with him at lunch when he didn't have plans with others. The first thing he noticed was that he did have food on his tray. It just wasn't a lot (for Sejanus' standards, at least). There was a sandwich of some kind that made his mouth water and a glass of water on the side. Sejanus would usually get up to refill the glass once or twice, focusing more on that than the sandwich.
The second thing he noticed was that he never ate the sandwich in its entirety. He'd take a bite or pick at it, but that was all. Did he not like it? Did he still have enough money to afford food, just not as much? Was it that disposable?
He'd fest that. On the day the Academy didn't provide lunch, he asked, "Mind if I have some of that sandwich? I'm afraid breakfast wasn't enough."
Sejanus simply shrugged and set the whole thing on his plate. "Knock yourself out.. Just mind the cheese. I know you can't stomach that stuff."
Coriolanus raised an eyebrow, taking a bite of it anyway. He nearly sighed at the taste– It was a simple beef and cheese sandwich, but it was heavenly. "You know I'm lactose intolerant? I don't think I've mentioned that."
"You did." Sejanus watched him carefully as he ate. "Once.. Guess I remembered."
Huh. Odd.
That doesn't matter, though. What does is the answer to his question– He has access to food, and just refuses it. Now the next question.
Over the next few days, if he was able to get his hands on a snack of some kind, he'd offer it to Sejanus.. Who would always decline. Every single time.
"Are you sure? It's really no trouble."
Sejanus would shake his head no with a kind, tired smile. "It's alright.. I'm still stuffed from this morning."
Funny. I heard your stomach rumbling for nearly all of 2nd period.
Denying food and lying about it, plus the fatigue..
Oh.. What an interesting turn of fates.
And the cherry on top? Running off to the bathroom after encounters where he did have to eat.
Now all that was left was the confrontation– Insider information. Wrap everything in a nice bow. The question was.. How?
A gentle conversation was for the best.. Especially considering Sejanus. He looked like he wanted to cry when he was reprimanded in the slightest.
Coriolanus decided to try one day after class. "Sejanus.. Do you mind if I talk to you for a moment?" He asked once everyone had filtered out of the room.
"Sure."
Coriolanus wet his lips. No point in beating around the bush. "Why do you never eat?"
Sejanus froze. ".. I do. Just not as much as I used to do."
"Really? I haven't seen you touch a crumb of food in the past month or so.. You deny it. And you look mortified when you do have to eat."
"It's.. It's nothing. Can we please just drop this?" Sejanus pleaded, already sounding agitated. He must've hit a nerve. Why not hit it again?
"No one likes a liar.. Come on, we're friends. Talk to me.. Why do this to yourself?"
“I can’t give you the answer you’re looking for.” Sejanus responded, tone uncharacteristically cold. Maybe that's what happens when someone reaches their breaking point.
Coriolanus laughed humorlessly. “Yes, you can. You just don’t want to. I’m getting bored of this tortured hero act, Sej. Stop acting like you have it so bad.”
“You really love to listen to yourself talk, don’t you?” Sejanus said with an exasperated scoff. “You don’t know what you’re talking about, so stop assuming that you do.” The tension in the air felt so thick, you could cut it with a knife. “You don’t know anything about me. And you don’t want to, so why bother?”
Coriolanus’ eyes darkened. “I know more than you think- I know a naive boy when I see one. I see a boy who so desperately wants something wrong in his life to explain why he’s feeling a certain way, when the truth is, his life is beyond perfect and he should just shut his damn mouth.”
“How is my life beyond perfect? You h-” He started.“
Oh, give me a break.” The boy cut him off, taking a few threatening steps closer as he spoke. “You can fool your Ma and your Pa with that sob story, but you can’t fool me. Look at you- Rescued from a lifetime of poverty, with everything you could want and more handed to you on a silver platter, and yet you still refuse to chew. Don’t think I haven’t noticed, Sejanus.”
Sejanus swallowed thickly. “I just think that-”
“Oh no, I’m not done.” Coriolanus interjected yet again. “No, I think it’s time you hear something along the lines of grow the hell up. You want change so bad? Go out. Change something. You have money. You have a powerful family name. Stop bitching and moaning like a wounded puppy and go do something with your life, for th-”
“I don’t have money. My father does. You think I haven’t tried?” Sejanus spat, voice wavering with emotion. “I can’t tell you the amount of times I’ve tried to set up a fund for the districts, or tried to maybe set up some sort of fundraiser. I have tried everything. And it’s still not enough. So excuse me for feeling a little hopeless.”
Coriolanus laughed like he had heard the funniest joke in the world. “That’s your defense, boy? Saying you did and now you’re giving up? God, you’re not good at this.. I’m trying to help you.”
“By doing what?"
“By knocking some sense into you. The world isn’t out to get you like you think it is. It’s actually working in your favor, just not the way you want it to.”
Sejanus fell quiet for a good while. Normally, this would've meant defeat or submission, but there was no grief in his eyes. Only anger- Anger for what was, and what could've been.
“You think I'm playing the broken hero? You're the one running around and trying to fix things that don't even involve you! A month ago, you wanted me dead, I'm sure of it. But now, suddenly you're in my face? So what if I don't eat? That's my choice!” He cried, tears stinging his eyes. "What does it matter to you what I do? Wouldn't it be for the best if I weren't in your way?"
Sejanus had a point.. But he refused to admit it. They were making too much of a scene. He needed to get it under control before this became the school's latest gossip. ".. Because you are my friend. I may not always show it the best, but.. I do care. And I don't like watching my friends suffer."
".. How am I supposed to trust that? Why the sudden change of heart?"
Coriolanus placed a hand on his shoulder, giving it a squeeze. "Because I know what it's like to be hungry. And I wouldn't wish it upon anyone.."
Sejanus looked up at him, brown eyes full of tears. ".. I just don't know what else to do "
"I'll help you.. I promise." Sejanus nodded. Good. He had him back in the palm of his hand. He sealed the interaction with a hug before pulling away. "Now, let's get you back to class, hm?"
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taglist: @officialelioperlman @on-plvto @theirgayyourhonour
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designernishiki · 8 months
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it’s kinda funny to me how that dumb scene in kiwami 1 of majima getting shot and left for dead in the harbor was basically just added as a half-assed way to explain majima not being around for a bit of the plot, but they accidentally(?) just made it seem like start of a chain reaction where majima ended up feeling slighted and heartbroken after being abandoned like that and then lashed out about it via smashing a big truck into the building kiryu was in. and yeah that isn’t inherently a romantic thing as-is but then they go and add the part where majima grabs a hostess and performatively hits on her as in-kiryu’s-face as possible, she says she’s already in love with someone, and majima lets her go immediately, no questions asked, making a big fucking point of it just to say see THAT kiryu? I appreciate when people are HONEST about their FEELINGS. people who won’t just BACKSTAB someone who CARES about them to save themselves. is that so crazy kiryu?? huh??? anyway make it up to me get down here and fight me right fucking now
#I think on another level he was sorta saying like ‘hey kiryu. you’re making it extremely clear that you don’t trust me and my intentions#and I’ve been trying to show you- over and over again- that I’d do just about anything for you and your safety#but I can’t just let my mask fall off in front of everyone- I need to keep up the unpredictable morally grey wildcard act for both my sake#AND yours. because disguising my helping you as crazy random violent outbursts and weird stalker behavior#is the only way I CAN help you. do you think it would go over well with shimano or literally anyone else if I was outright helping you out#of the kindness of my heart and fondness for you? stop being so fucking dense and look past the crazy wacky nonsense for a second and#maybe you’ll realize that all I do at the end of the day- really- is help you and put my own life and reputation on the line for you.#I am an honest guy when it comes to my real values and when I told you I wouldn’t let anyone kill you unelss it was myself- I meant it.#I’ve taken a knife and a bullet for you now. can you REALLY not see through the act yet? am I REALLY that unpredictable when you think about#it?’#that was a longer explanation than i intended but. it was difficult to put into words#I basically feel like it could be read as him implying kiryu shouldn’t backstab the people who put themselves on the line to help him#and/or pointing out that he’s never actually done kiryu dirty and has stuck to his word protecting him in the ways he can#trying to say yeah all this is a crazy act and all but when it comes down to it you Can trust me#it really makes sense when you think about it that he’d have to help kiryu/show affection towards kiryu in unpredictable convoluted ways#at that point in time because. I mean. there’s a reason he was the only person who showed up to welcome kiryu when he got out of prison#and that’s because A) he sticks to his word and his loyalty to people he cares about and B) no one else had the balls or the batshit insane#mask to wear to ward off anyone asking real questions like majima did. because ANYONE associating themselves with the supposed#patriarch-killer was a HUGE NO-NO at the time. someone important showing up for kiryu and welcoming him back outright could’ve caused#all-out warfare probably. except majima. because majima was dedicated and smart enough to use his widely-feared wildcard persona#(that everyone tended to view as incapable of having any Real agenda to worry about) to his And kiryu’s advantage#does that make sense??? I feel like it makes a lot of sense if you get it to click in your head#kazumaji#majima#kiryu#yakuza#kiwami 1#yk1#rambling
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fantastic-nonsense · 1 year
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*takes you all by the shoulders* look at me. look at me. Kaz's true love isn't krugre, he's feigning because he doesn't want to admit "weakness" and acknowledge that he actually cares for people. Kaz pretending to care for nothing but money is a front. a facade. a lie.
if you genuinely think he loves money more than he loves his friends you're ignoring the entirety of Crooked Kingdom and buying into the persona he built for himself instead of seeing underneath the armor he wears
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maegalkarven · 4 months
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Thinking of Ravengard Ward AU where things proceed to the point of the events of the game with several results:
Levi, convinced by Gortash fighting off Bhaal is only possible with the Crown of Karsus and growing desperate with every day (as Bhaal pushes to control him with growing force), ventures into Mephistar to steal it from Mephistopheles.
While he is gone Ravengard goes to Elturel and, as Elturel falls to Avernus, descends there too. Duke's second son Wyll, an aspiring ranger, ventures into Hells alongside with counselor Florrick in a quest to find Ulder Ravengard. Levi returns from Mephistar to find all of his family gone. He wants to rush after them to Avernus, but Bhaal's hold on him is getting worse with everyday, and he's running out of time. He hopes his brother and Florrick know what they're doing.
With Ravengard missing and Florrick out of the city, Enver Gortash conspires to have proclaim the duke dead, making Leviathan Ravengard his heir and successor.
The Absolute Plan is set into motion, with only one god (Myrkul) involved. Levi and Gortash are forced to work with Ketheric bc the illithid colony is literally Under His House. Levi plans to betray the man and clean the shadow-cursed lands because this is what Jaheira and the harpers would have wanted. He when plans to use the newly gained with Absolute power to destroy Bhaal, Bane and Myrkul in one go. Gortash plans to obtain the power alike gods without any restrictions gods are forced under.
The first illithid-infected people start to appear. Jaheira and Minsc go to investigate, Minsc gets infected. Levi plans to use him as a leverage against Jaheira and Wyll if (then) they will disagree with his plans.
The incoming wedding of Duke Leviathan Ravengard and Lord Enver Gortash is announced. Lord Gortash is then going to be proclaimed the first Archduke of Baldur's Gate, with his husband's full support.
Wyll and Florrick meet Karlach and team up with her. Wyll is horrified to find out the guy who is dating his older brother sold Karlach to the deviless. Together they find Duke Ravengard and hijack the nautiloid.
The following (with all the in-game steps) events are:
Wyll and the team (Wyll is the leader) reach BG just in time to be informed of the passed wedding and the incoming inauguration of Lord Gortash.
They are horrified what has happened to the city in their absence. Ravengard, Wyll and Jaheira try to talk sense into Levi, Levi argues back what none of them know what it's like to have the God of Murder in their head all the time. What Bhaal was showing him more things these days, what he knows his destiny - he is a pureblood bhaalspawn, made out of Bhaal's dead flesh, he is destined to destroy the world. He is trying to convince them this is the only way he can do it, what this way he can destroy all gods for good, his Father included. What with the power the stones and Absolute gives them, he and Gortash can become new gods, can change the very rules of the universe - and wouldn't it be great?
The huge argument follows and Levi storms out, angry.
The next time they see him is at the inauguration, when, instead of proclaiming Gorash the new Archduke, Levi murders everyone but Gortash (who by this point is used to his husband's murder sprees and is successfully defended by Steel Watch) in the Hall.
Wyll and co walk into the Hall, expecting confrontation, but finding Levi in a pool of blood as Gortash tries to make him come out of the stupor.
Levi raises a desperate gaze at his brother and says: "Don't you see? It's getting worse. Bhaal is so angry. This is the only way. Why can't you see? Why no one but Enver can see it?!"
#dark urge: levi#ravengard ward au#durgetash#i love how this au in some ways is better#but in some ways is even worse#Levi is one of the Big Bad#his main motivation is getting free from Bhaal and not killing Ulder Wyll Florrick Jaheira Minsc and Gortash#everyone else can burn in hell for all he cares about#Enver Gortash is living his best life manipulating and malewifing his way into very questionable not exactly godhood#his husband growing more apeshit with everyday is unexpectedly upsetting tho#and ketheric died too early it freed brain from the part of the command#he KNEW they shouldn't have involved him at all#they could've done it just the two of them#he eventually plans to venture into mephisto's vault again but at this point he frantically researches all the way they can erase bhaal#from the existence bc fuck this levi is HIS. No gods are allowed between them#at some point levi stopped being a ladder to greatness and become important and gortash missed when this moment was#meanwhile tadpoled minsc is fighting bhaalists bc Levi ordered him to#Levi is like “you're a known enemy of Bhaal. Let's put it to good use”#he legit sent poor minsc to find a way to the temple of bhaal and find a way inside#also Orin is getting apeshit around the city too just for the sake of it and bc dad said so#Levi doesn't like it but he knows confronting his sister and killing her will make him into Abdel 2.0.#meaning either he will die in the fight or Bhaal will turn him into his meat puppet when Orin drops dead#so he'll send jaheira and co after her trail of dead bodies too#Karlach: Gortash is Evil!#Wyll and Ravengard: yeah we know. He is married to our Levi tho.#Karlach: 'your Levi' just killed everyone in this room but the only man I actually want to see dead!#Jaheira: it it's of any conciliation he doesn't look happy about it. Neither does Gortash
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shopcat · 5 days
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there is, Obviously, fundamentally a difference between headcanon and an analytical reading of text, and treating the two as exactly the same is not only wrong but devalues both, but funnily, i've found people tend to forget that both of these things are the product of referencing our real life experiences and applying them where we see fit to make a more interesting way to interact with media. and you can't just like, forget that it's not JUST about headcanons and meta analysis and whatever, because people in real life also still matter. and in real life, there are different stakes and EXPERIENCES, and those experiences lead to thinking the way we do because that's how you Be a goddamn person, which is why it's ironic is all 😭
like, saying zuko atla has to be cis in order to be "properly" gay in order to be Truly Compelling narratively is fucking ridiculous. textually, zuko is not actually gay. he never was intended to be, he never will be intended to be, he was never even subtextually. the assumption otherwise is already rooted in fantasy, and the tongue in cheek assertion that it isn't, which means it has more credence, is ... dumb? childish? admitting to at least yourself that the things you talk about wrt character analysis aren't the intention of the creator is literally half the point of doing said analysis – you're MEANT to throw away the intended interpretation in order to give it a new life through different keyholes without entirely divorcing itself from the text. (in the same breath, insisting the creator truly meant One Thing when they absolutely would not have/don't care at all, and ignoring that the people who made the piece are going to put their own biases and experiences and background into the media itself and actually MUST be taken into account for things like this is just ... well. Stop That.)
i've personally never been someone to ever claim that The Writers All Along INTENDED to do something that they obviously didn't, like make a character from a 2005 cartoon lgbt+. this doesn't mean that reading doesn't have any substance or cannot possibly hold any meaning, or that it's wrong. if you can't be objective about your own readings what's the damn point... leaning into it being fiction, which changes just by being observed by a different person, is why it's fun or interesting to do in the first place. and yeah there are some basic cookie cutter headcanons people like to fling around, and there can be criticism for that otherwise, but claiming headcanons themselves AREN'T an offshoot of this way of thinking is fucking stupid. like it's plain wrong.
our own thoughts on why a character acts, what they do, what their presentation is, why their personality is what it is up to and including their sexuality, gender identity, religion, JOB, whatever, are made to fill the gaps the text can't or won't provide, and in the case of lgbt ones as long as it's not actively harmful (as in like insisting a lesbian character is bi or something) it is literally harmless seeing as it is fairly solidly a "won't", along with a whole bunch of other hc material that usually don't see the light of day on-screen nonstereotypically. people seeing themselves in characters isn't new but more than that, saying that you know this but then pushing it aside because The Analysis Means More when it's Realistic And Plausible is fucking dumb. and rude. bc the entire point of drawing the line of connections this way is how WE see them. being all like "oh well, your own personal identity is still valid otherwise, don't get your feelings hurt bc it doesn't matter," is moot if you've already asserted there's only One real way to be... plausible 🤨. which is to be NORMAL ! duh.
like, the read that zuko IS gay (and cis) relies on extracting parts through the lens of our own gay perceptions and is why cishet fans don't pick up on it, but you can ask pretty much any other lgbt fan and they'll agree. zuko's narrative arc IS compelling with the read that he is gay, from the way he is ostracised by his family, neglected and abused, the "punishment" he receives and then continues to become his own warden of, the order of his death and the banishment itself, sozin criminalising homosexuality, his inability to connect with others especially his own age, his inability to seamlessly interact with girls, his literal externalised viewing of seeing himself as someone with Two Sides, them being good vs evil, realising he can change the damn world through love and acceptance, striving for peace, being the face of change for his nation, relearning what it means to be who he is once he is free from his past, the shame and humiliation rituals, the claim of his father that he is worthless as a prince and person, AND MORE... and i cannot express enough here how fucking little it matters if he's specifically gay or WHAT THE HELL EVER 😭.
to claim in no small way that it's impossible for a trans person, or a bisexual person, or anyone else lgbt, could ever line up his narrative with their own personal one is so beyond ridiculous it gives me a headache. no, "plausibly", i don't think zuko is like, transmasc. yes, plausibly, he could be gay. plausibly, he could be amab nonbinary but no one seems to actually give a fuck about that for some reason (i wonder!). nothing would change in both cases, because he's not actually either, so i really don't see the point in making fun of or being frustrated by one to lift up the other because you want cisgender boot soles to brush the back of your throat THAT badly. the implausibility of thinking any way about a fictional character should be taken into account to an extent, sure, but at the end of the day neither of us are doing anything truly worthwhile, and no one is claiming that it's the intent from the beginning to say otherwise, so what's the point here. why are we doing this. let's go skip in a meadow together before i kill someone with this rock.
#🐾#tldr i am actually just so sick of people saying the word plausible#it's not plausible for this character to be trans. well OKAY. THARS NOT THE FUCKING POINT IDIOT#not every fucking thing people do is for the sake of furthering the fucking plot holy shit what is wrong with you#these people will never know joy or happiness and forever be miserable bc they're just OBSESSED with trying to rationalise.. art?!#LIKE ITS NOT GONNA HAPPENNNN 😭#even if it is a plausible trans read people will pick it apart. I Know. i've been there. people do not and i hate to break it to you#like trans people. even other trans people. SHOCK HORROR. jesus christ#this is a real torture dungeon of my own creation#also my two cents personally i think the sum of who zuko is as a person is first and foremost autistic and gay. and everything else is as#an abuse victim. and i honestly don't care if he's trans bc it doesn't matter in the way ppl need to be tantruming over#but it still would be just as significant if not more so. acruallg definitely more so what the hell. my family doesn't hate me bc i Like#Boys .. OR GIRLS.#and YEAH sokka does read more trans sure. but he also is the one who got made fun of for at least like matching his belt and bag#or liking shopping or being feminine ..#is this what people mean when they say that... that katara would be transphobic to her own brother 😭#well probably not. anyway.#if we're being textual sokka literally IS the one with some sort of gay subtext just FOR being the victim of the charming 2000s lightly#homophobic joking. not zuko. no one gives af about zuko#it does not break my arm to say zuko got banished for being too much sowmrbing and not enough something and got to be himself afterwards#in the slow journey that that took. this could mean literlalt anything. so who cares#he's lgbt all at once. There. bitch#also these ppl bc it was a whole bunch ofc. seemed to just mostly be mad bc zuko got the hc more#like how is that everyone else's problem now. just make sokka trans more ... idiot#☆
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couldbebetterforsure · 5 months
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Why the fuck you lyin'?
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Why you always lyin'?
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Hmmmmm Oh my god
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Stop fucking lying!
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robbyykeene · 2 years
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The problem I continue to have with this show is that as much as I love Johnny and Miguel’s relationship, it continues to come at the expense of Robby. And while this obviously creates Tension and Drama like you want in a tv show, there has failed to be any actual narrative acknowledgment that that is the cause of the tension and drama. And I don’t mean that there’s no acknowledgement of Robby and Miguel’s rivalry because like. Duh. But lately the show frames it as though the only problem is that Robby and Miguel are at odds, and once they finally become friends they can all be one big happy family with Johnny and live happily ever after. But Robby and Miguel’s contempt for each other was never the problem. It was Johnny’s inability to juggle the responsibilities of parenting his son while also being there for Miguel. Which is inadvertently what actually caused Miguel and Robby to dislike each other so much in the first place.
And I think that’s why I’m so just. Annoyed. Because they chose to characterize Johnny this way! They chose to make him an incredibly flawed person, and father in particular. And narratively and thematically that was a good and compelling choice! I mean, it was quite literally the foundation of the entire show. But more and more every season they’ve been outsourcing all of the legwork of Johnny’s redemption onto the characters around him. And if this is Johnny’s redemption story as they claim—if you want to create this flawed tragic character and then redeem him—then just do that. Commit to it! Don’t create a flawed character and then blame everyone around him for his problems, especially not the two kids who’ve been most affected by his faults and failings.
#like. i just KNOW this show. theyre predictable#and whats going to happen is miguel and robby will make uo and all will#be sunshine and rainbows#and yeah im exaggerating obviously#but reading what billy said in that interview#like. robby didnt ‘resist’ johnny being there for him johnny just. literally wasnt there for him. ever#and its so mind boggling genuinely#because the writers show one thing and say another#and i dont know what theyre so afraid of#of people not liking johnny? dont you WANT your audience to struggle? wasnt that the entire premise of the series?#to find this man loveable and sympathetic and then also kind of reprehensible in a lot of ways?#because if not then how is this a redemption story?#its just a male fantasy#white guy abandons his family succumbs to alcoholism beats the shit out of everyone around him and then with no work on his part is crowned#winner of everything and has everyone in his life tripping over themselves to have him forgive them#and if thats the show they want to make fine!!! but be UPFRONT about it for fucks sake#and i say shit like this and people accuse me of hating johnny and its like. you’re missing the point!!! i love johnny so much that#i actually care about him being a well rounded character!!!#i want to see him accept responsibility!!! i want to see him realize the damage HES caused as a result of his inability to process his own#trauma!!!!#i want the rich character that i was promised at the onset of this series!!!#hahdbsjsjjsjdjwjxnf#personal
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