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#for now good night my loves <3
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You think Lip sometimes looks at Ian and Mickey and just smiles a little to himself because who would've seen that coming?
Like, Lip's always been good with odds and numbers and back in the day, back when they started out a fucking lifetime ago, absolutely nobody would have bet on those two making it in the end.
He had been around back then, on the side lines catching glimpses from time to time. From 'Mickey's gay and we're doing it' and 'i know what he felt with me' to 'you think i should've?' and 'because i love him'.
And Lip hesitates in the doorway when he enters the living room for a moment and watches them lie on the couch in front of the TV, wrapped up in each other's arms, sleepy and content, for once neither bickering nor on the verge of fucking and he thinks that he's never seen Ian so happy and being himself this much at the same time before.
And maybe he shakes his head when he looks at the man in his brother's arms because holy fucking shit that's Mickey Milkovich right there.
That's 'someone's gotta get a beat down', it's 'oh shit is right', it's anger issues and russian prostitutes and attempted murder and escaping prison to fucking mexico.
But it's also the guy who pours Ian his coffee in the morning and makes sure he doesn’t drink it before he’s had something to eat, who used to count his fucking pills, who once bought a bag full of B vitamins as if they could fix it all somehow.
It’s who Ian lost sleep over, it’s who he made his best bad decisions for.
It's Franny's Uncle Mickey, it's Mandy's older brother and holy shit, it's Ian's fucking husband.
And isn't that so beautifully Ian, that he saw something in that dirty faced thug from ten years ago that no one else ever bothered to look for? that he found a love that proved itself to be stronger than whatever life or fate or Terry fucking Milkovich threw at them, that pulled them back to each other every time they fell apart?
Mickey has been a constant presence in Ian’s life in a way that nothing else but Lip himself ever had. Has been a witness, a catalyst, a victim of Ian’s epic highs and lows, has done insane things to and for and because of him. As fucked up as they always were, they seem to hold the balance, they somehow make it work.
Lip loves his brother with all his heart, has done so his entire life, he knows all the best and a lot of the worst of Ian and he knows that Mickey knows it too. Loves him, too. Signed up for it all, the whole package, good times and bad, sickness and health, Monica and Gay Jesus, mania and depression. Had probably signed up for it long before they stood in front of witnesses at the Polish Doll.
So Lip smiles sometimes when they bicker over breakfast cereal or when Ian can’t keep his hands to himself even when the rest of them is right there or when Mickey talks shit like he’s still big bad Milkovich, south side thug extraordinaire and not the boy who has been in love with Lip’s little brother for the last decade.
Because it’s nice to see they made it. Because if anyone deserves a happy ending and a gentle future, it’s them.
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0the-silent-artist0 · 7 months ago
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A h a h a g👀d sh❗t my dudes!!
#alright life update#shit's been wild i mean california is on fire#some days the sky was orange#covid is still around#but we make due with what we got ya know???#ive had the songs Make You Mine and I Do Adore stuck in my head. they make me feel all warm and fuzzy :^)#school and my internship have been both fun nd stressful but they keep me on my toes so im having a charming time#especially fogure drawing. i forgot how much i love figure drawing so thats cool!! but i wish it was in person#i think danny boi and i are gonna hsve another movie night soon so thats somethin lovely to look forward to!!#i also have a lot of art ideas but i just dont got time to draw them!!!!!! school and my internship and commissions are takimg up my time#to the point that im up at 3 or 4 am working and sleeping only 4 hours or so#now usually id hate that because holy shit im so fucking tired all the time. but im seeing really good results in my work so im actually#pretty fine with it. also gives me an excuse to make different kinds of coffee in the morning so this is fun#also been checking up on old friends and new ones because sometimes you just dont know what theyre going through#a friend of mine transferred to the uni i go to so its interestin hearing about his first weeks attending!! i feel reall bad that it had to#happen online though. hopefully his ne t year will be in person!!#another friend of mine is looking for a uni to transfer to so im helping her find one!! i told her aboit my uni but i know she loves big#campuses so im looking at others too!!!!#over all im busy as heck and have been on tumblr so much less#hope that anon that reads my rambles enjoys this. stay safe out there!!#and dont forget to check on your friends and family and anyone who crosses your mind. a simple hello goes a long way!
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gamezzzz · 20 minutes ago
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UPDATE
HI. Hello there! Haven’t been in here in almost a week and it feels weird. I’m usually like active on this app daily. XD Um—so a few things
1) I’m planning on changing my username as I made a new carrd + my theme will change soon as well.
2) I GOT ENHYPEN’S BORDER: CARNIVAL ALBUM AKDHKADVKSHDKSHDJSH ITS THE HYPE VER AND EVERYTHING LOOKS SO PRETTY [do y’all wanna see the pictures or do I just have to DM one of my moots for this?]
3) I got accepted into a new network after a day of not being on here and became mutuals with a few of the members so that’s fun 🤩
4) hit me UP in the DMs. I probably won’t be like posting stuff but I’ll be interacting and giving y’all updates because I love you
5) I HAVE 100+ FOLLOWERS WTH THANK YOU SO MUCH 💋
6) have a good day/afternoon/evening/night luv you
7) I watched the first Harry Potter movie today for the first time in my entire life and now I know what all the hype was about
Now that that’s over with imma go scream over these photo cards I got
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honeyedtulips · 44 minutes ago
Hello there! I saw your soft prompts and I wanted to request Bucky Barnes with hands kisses and Adore you by Harry Styles if it's no problem <3
adore you
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pairing: bucky barnes x reader ♡
genre: fluffy fluff ♡
summary: nervous bucky is an adorable bucky ♡
word count: 667 ♡
a/n: i hope you enjoy this and it satisfies you ♡ here’s the song if you wish to listen while you read ♡ have a great day!
*image above is not mine ♡*
🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷
a plethora of stars heavily thronged the open night sky above your head. it was nearing past midnight. you had been out on a late night date with bucky, your boyfriend. he’d taken you to see a drive-in movie like the ones he’d experienced in the 40’s. you were elated at how happy he looked seeing something so familiar and close to home. he’d even done something he’d never done before with you. when a particularly romantic scene in the movie came up, he wrapped his arm around you and placed his head against yours. it was such a casual and subtle movement, but it made your stomach swim with too many butterflies to count. when the credits had started rolling, bucky had even leaned over and pecked the top of your head. by the time you had left, your whole body was beaming with glee. you felt like dancing to a bunch of happy songs in your bedroom and never stopping!
“will i see you next weekend?”
you blinked rapidly when you realized bucky was talking to you. the two of you were now standing in front of your apartment, a looming, grey building with creaky floors and dull windows. bucky had been inside before and he’d seemed comfortable there, saying it felt like a good home to stay in. you were proud that he found your living quarters peaceful. you hoped one day you could get a home to stay in with him and that he’d feel the same way about it as well.
“yep,” you pecked his cheek. “you can bet on it! how about we go to that one restaurant you liked? the one with the really cheesy pasta?”
“oh yeah,” bucky’s face beamed at the memory. “i’d like that, doll. thank you.”
“of course!” you reached forward, letting your fingers slide against his. he tightened his hand around yours, pulling you flush against his body. he dipped his head, raising your hand to his lips and letting them press against your skin. you loved when he was so close to you, when you could catch every whiff of his scent. it was something you could only describe as specifically and magically bucky. it was amazing. when he straightened himself back up again, his gorgeous blue eyes were glimmering in the moonlight. you thought he looked like he’d walked straight out of a romance movie, but you knew if you told him he wouldn’t really believe you.
“can i ask you something, baby?”
you nodded, watching as bucky put the hand that wasn’t cautiously holding yours in his pocket. a few strands of his gloriously shiny black hair fell in his eyes. he looked nervous, small shades of red beginning to tint his cheeks. it was adorable.
“my – uhm – well, i know – y-you – you know sam, right?” his perfect pink lips parted as he timidly caught his breath.
“yeah,” you replied, easily remembering the kind and brave man who bucky had introduced you too. “he’s captain america, bucky! i can’t exactly forget that. you went to his cookout after all that flag smashers stuff finished.”
“well i – yeah, i did go to his cookout – um – he’s celebrating his nephew’s birthday and he said i could bring you – if you want to go – i mean – damn, i didn’t ask yet – um –”
“yes, bucky,” you whispered. you reached up to gingerly kiss his mouth. “i’ll go with you.” when you pulled away, the smile spreading across his face was blinding. he reached forward, lifting you up and spinning you in a circle. the laughs and giggles spraying from your mouth were cut off when he kissed you, his mouth surging to meet yours. you kissed him back just as eagerly, throwing your arms around him and holding him close.
there was no place in the world you’d rather be than in the arms of james buchanan barnes.
lucky for you, there was no one else he’d rather stay in the whole world with than you.
love,
honeyedtulips x♡🌷
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gismonews · 49 minutes ago
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KUU XBOOK 14.1 inch 8GB RAM 512GB Intel Celeron J4115
Laptop is about 1.3 kilos. So inside we have a power, adapter very, very light, very small and it does have an asian type of plug, but there is also the adapter there to convert it to british plug so no complaint on that, and this is the machine itself. So already, the presentation is pretty good and it’s, also all cardboard, which is nice um, a bit more environmentally friendly, apart from, of course, the form to try and try to protect in well warranty card, and this is a one year warranty on it. Some instructions. Okay in several languages and also some stickers for the keyboard in case, you want to convert it to a different language. I assume there will be a american keyboard and we have several languages as a sort of a startup system. I, like the look of it already: um let’s, go through a few things, so we have a mini hdmi here, love it. So this is a usb which is nice, tucked away it’s a usb type 3, which can be expanded when you need to connect it. But in the meantime, it keeps a nice line for the laptop that’s, the connection for the charger and, on the other side again, another usb same scenario. So this is a very very nice feature, a tf card and a headphone jack. Here we have the 512 gigabyte ssd. This machine comes with either a 256 or a 512. I went directly for the 512 a bit of extra space, and actually the value of it was also pretty good.
If you want to replace it, it’s just one little screw and then you can change it for whatever you want. I don’t know if you can see guys, but the chassis seems to be pretty solid, so there is barely any flex in the keyboard as well same with the monitor. Um is not bad at all. Actually, considering how light it is, there is a minimum flex, but the chassis does seem pretty good anyway, so first impression already very, very good and again once he’s closed well. Personally, i think he looks pretty stylish and again feels very. Very light is 1.313, so it’s 1.3 kilo exactly. I will put also the charger and adapter on it just because most people will carry that with them as well. So with that included, it comes to 1.440, so it’s 1.4 kilo it’s, not even one and a half kilos with everything, included a couple of observations. While we have the machine upside down, so we have the stereo speakers there. Um and the machine is, as you can see, is very well balanced. Putting my finger right in the middle without trying to drop it, but you can see then, is actually very well balanced. The body is hard plastic, so as much as it does look like a metal chassis um, it is a plastic uh covering in the bottom and cover but uh, but it feels very good. It looks very nice as well and, as i said, there is a pretty good stiffness all throughout so i’ve, been using this machine.
For a couple of weeks now, and just to summarize a few things that i really like and potentially don’t like of the computer and to begin with i mentioned before, when you open the computer, it slightly tells the keyboard, which i really really like it does put In a more ergonomic way, um the keyboard is fantastic. I want to show you also how quickly the computer starts anyway. The keyboard is very, very good. Um. All the keys are traveling a perfect amount to give you a bit of a tactile feeling then it’s, good, um computer is already. I change the language, also nice and easy to do all the keys are very well balanced, even something like the space bar as you can see. Even if i press it on this side, it does keep a very good balance on it. Let me just put my password in there we go um the monitor, uh, very nice, very bright, as you can see, um, even with quite a strong lighting at the moment on works very well going back to the keyboard. Also, one feature that i really like is at the moment it’s quite bright, but, as you can see, there are a couple of different settings to turn on a light on it as well so it’s, quite handy uh during the night time, and also the separation between The keys is very, very good, so it makes typing very comfortable without struggling potentially to type to click, two keys at the same time, trackpad and ideally would have liked it slightly taller.
Potentially, they could have put the keyboard slightly higher up and then make the trackpad taller um. However, it works incredibly well, it is very smooth, it is very responsive and of course, you have multiple uh touch system as well that you can select. It also fits very well the screen because, as you can see, size wise, they are pretty much the similar thing, so even the movements are precise for the type of screen as well. The feel is very good. It’S, not glass by all means let’s keep in mind, and this is a 300 pounds machine or even cheaper, but yeah works incredibly well. The machine, as i said, is very very fast. Even considering the price um, everything is very responsive. You saw how quickly uh it turned on earlier on and now going to open openoffice, which is quite a navy program, as you know, but everything works very well there we go so this speaker speakers are also very, very good um, so let’s, maybe open google we’ll Open a video i’ll even try to open a 4k video, so so we’ll check and we’ll we’ll push really the uh the quality of the processor and the screen. So you will see then it plays it fine with no problem at all. Of course, the screen is not 4k um, but it is able, anyway to um there we go to push through um such a navy, um Music. Stop this such an heavily graphical program with no problem at all.
Let’S keep the ad there. We go and let’s put the volume up as well. Now, of course, it’s going to rely on my internet connection, which is not the fastest, so this is not actually the computer. This is actually my internet connection that is struggling a bit, but, as you can see, the quality of the picture is fantastic and you can probably hear the speakers as well. The speakers are underneath stereo speakers and we’ll put some music on in a second just to um to test those a bit better, but yeah quality of the screen is uh. Absolutely superb, and so here is just to test the the quality of the music um. I put the speakers at maximum volume, as you can probably hear i’m shouting at the moment um. So they are pretty decent um overall for uh for the size and the the price of the machine. As you can hear, they are quite well balanced and just a little awkward thing that i noticed and it might trigger some people. He did me originally, and i changed the language to the system, all in italian so and you can change it to whichever language you want to. It works very well, not a problem at all. However, one of the cool things is that when you go into the speaker, you have some chinese characters there and actually, you know, put rename on it in purpose. To show them is possible to change it um, but that is not actually mentioned in the speaker for what i can understand, that is potentially the brand of the sound card.
So that is something that will always in one way or another, come out, but to kind of rename the whole system. You know, let’s call it speakers um just go on to the icon of the speaker over there right bottom of the mouse um. Unfortunately, i did change it in italian, but it is the same thing with regards of uh, doing it in english as well uh options there. There you go and then just put whatever you want on it um once you rename it now, you will have it as the speakers coming out there. There you go. Of course, if you press the right button of the mouse hold on. If you press sorry, the left button of the mouse comes up as speakers, and then you still have that character that unfortunately, cannot be removed, um, but yeah doing this anyway. It does allow you to change uh, the speaker part and it’s the same with regards to the input. You do exactly the same thing and those are the only two things that i noticed then. For some reason, i have some chinese characters um. So this is the microphone which i assume is because it’s the brand of the parts itself. Another great thing is that this machine is actually reasonably powerful on the graphic part of it. So um, okay, you cannot play triple a games, but you can play some games that are reasonably graphically demanding and it plays very, very well Music, hmm, ah Applause, Applause.
Finally, on the negative parts, um and believe me, i don’t think there are many. I really like the machine. One thing that is dreadful and in fairness is dreadful on all the machine of this price. Is the camera i’m not even going to bother opening? Believe me, it is a bit rubbish again. I don’t particularly mind. I actually prefer that if they want to skimp on something skimp on that, just because it’s very easy to purchase a cheap and cheerful camera, you can find one for about 15 quid onwards and they always do a far far better job than those internal cameras. Do um, apart from that you know it is a fantastic little machine. I really like the possibility of upgrading the ssd. If you want to, i mean i went for a 512, so i really don’t think i will ever need that, as you can see, it’s very, very um, very thin. The hdmi is a mini hdmi. So if you want to use a normal cable, you might need a little dongle little conversion, but i understand why they went for it because after all, it’s, so small, then even a full usb um cannot be fit onto the chassis. But this system is quite an ingenious one, um and again, as i said before, two usb type three on both sides so guys i hope you like this review of this q machine um. Personally, as i said, i find it a very nice little bargain if you like the review thumbs up, would be amazing if you don’t, like my charming italian accent, you know what to do and subscribe.
It will really help me thanks.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wzvRaSSUDkg
The article was originally published here!
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funkinlove · 54 minutes ago
Hello! Came by to become another emoji anon😳 I really love your writing and I might request in the future (if ever your requests are open!), but for now I wanna say that you’re really cool and I hope u have a good day or night~ -🍵🖊
LOUD SOBBING!!!
YOU have a good day/night!!! it's almost 9 pm so im prolly gonna hit they hay, i have to go get my hair braided tomorrow
requests will be open for a few days longer! i plan to just close them until i clear out the like. eight? requests in the inbox
y'all are so sweet pls <3
i know an anon is here from devi's blog.... go tell her a fellow est gal says bedtime
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tabloidtoc · an hour ago
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Entertainment Weekly, June
Cover: The Pride Issue cover 3 of 4 -- Lena Waithe
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Page 3: Contents, other covers featuring Lil Nas X, Mj Rodriguez, Bowen Yang
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Page 4: Sound Bites
Page 7: The Cold Open
Page 14: The Must List -- In the Heights
Page 15: Instructions for Dancing by Nicola Yoon, Iceage -- Seek Shelter, Ziwe
Page 18: Trying Q&A with Esther Smith and Rafe Spall, Day Zero by C. Robert Cargill
Page 20: Milestone Returns #0: Infinite Edition, In Treatment
Page 21: Brat: An '80s Story by Andrew McCarthy, The Empty Man
Page 22: My Must List Pride Edition -- Niecy Nash
Page 25: Pride 2021
Page 26: Lil Nas X -- the 22-year-old rapper is still breaking barriers one song and several clapbacks at a time
Page 29: St. Vincent -- the chameleonic singer-songwriter returns with Daddy's Home, an adventurous new album inspired by her father's prison time
Page 30: Olly Alexander -- after a lauded lead turn in It's a Sin, the artist returned with the single Starstruck, from his newly solo musical act Years & Years
* Rostam -- the new solo album from the multi-instrumentalist is rooted in society's fear of change
Page 32: Lena Waithe -- the producer and actor, and the new star of Master of None season 3, wants to create provocative art while elevating voices
Page 35: Josh Thomas -- the Australian creator-star of Everything's Gonna Be Okay is telling his story through his art
Page 36: Meet Your Maker -- Natalie Morales -- the queer star directs her first film(s), the sharp indies Plan B and Language Lessons. Here's what got her behind the camera
Page 37: Joshua Safran -- the man behind Alex Parrish's attitude and Blair Waldorf's one-liners shares how his sexuality helps him empathize with his characters
* Brandon Taylor -- coming off his explosive, best-selling debut novel Real Life, the lauded author is looking toward his second act and beyond
Page 38: Mj Rodriguez -- with the final season of the history-making FX drama Pose, it's leading lady is ready to claim what's hers
Page 41: Colman Domingo -- after decades of stellar work, the scene-stealer is front and center on Euphoria, Fear the Walking Dead, and more
Page 42: Auli'i Cravalho -- the star of Disney's Moana proved how far she'll go to be her authentic self, and is now focused on joy and inclusion
Page 43: Queen Supremes -- the international RuPaul's Drag Race winning class speaks power to the franchise's worldwide domination and looks ahead to a fab future
Page 44: Bowen Yang -- the Saturday Night Live breakout is defining funny for a whole new generation and pushing boundaries in the process
Page 47: Margaret Cho -- the stand-up comedian plays the lesbian pal we all wish we had in the comedy Good on Paper
Page 48: Molly Bernard -- after playing Younger's pansexual publicist, she's ready to explore the full spectrum of queerness
* Josie Totah -- from Disney's Jessie to the Saved by the Bell revival and Amy Poehler's Moxie, the actress has made a name for herself twice and Hollywood's paying attention
Page 49: Calendar -- 10 upcoming LGBTQ projects to get excited for --from eye-opening documentaries to sweeping romances, there is plenty to add to your Pride watch queue
* Pride season's 6 essential reads
Page 51: Summer TV Preview
Page 52: Loki with Tom Hiddleston
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Page 53: Panic, The Celebrity Dating Game, Gossip Girl
Page 54: September Mornings, Schmigadoon!, Masters of the Universe: Revelation, Ted Lasso
Page 55: Heels, The Good Fight
Page 56: Power Book III: Raising Kanan
Page 57: Sweet Tooth, Blindspotting, Kevin Can F**k Himself, Mr. Corman
Page 58: We Are Lady Parts, Love Victor, Sex/Life, Turner & Hooch
Page 59: Physical, Hit & Run, American Rust
Page 60: Bosch, Marvel Studios' What If...?, Lisey's Story -- Q&A with Julianne Moore
Page 61: Calendar
Page 62: The Fast and the Furious oral history -- how did a little movie about underground racing speed off to become one of the most profitable franchises in history? The cast and crew reminisce about 20 years of Fast, one quarter-mile at a time
Page 68: News + Reviews -- Nominate Them, You Cowards -- on July 13, the Academy of Television Arts & Sciences will announce the 2021 Emmy nominees. Here are some standout shows and performances we insist not be overlooked
Page 72: Movies -- Summer Star -- taking the lead in blockbusters A Quiet Place II and Jungle Cruise, Emily Blunt is the face of Hollywood's comeback summer
Page 74: Making the Scene -- Army of the Dead -- Zack Snyder explains how he bet big on destroying Las Vegas in his bloody zombie heist movie
Page 75: Oxygen, The Woman in the Window -- the journey from smash best-seller to star-studded streaming thriller was long and fittingly bizarre
Page 76: Meet the Fab G -- director Kay Cannon on how Billy Porter found a fresh, inclusive take on the fairy godmother in the new Cinderella
Page 79: My Favorite Shot Pride Edition -- Sebastian Lelio, A Fantastic Woman -- the Chilean director revisits a gravity-defying sequence in his groundbreaking Oscar-winning drama
Page 80: TV -- The Underground Railroad
Page 81: The Upshaws
Page 82: Oral History -- in 2011, Teen Wolf premiered on MTV. Ten years later, we look back at the pilot episode that introduced us to Scott, Stiles and the werewolves of Beacon Hills -- Jeff Davis, Tyler Posey, Russell Mulgahy, Dylan O'Brien, Crystal Reed
Page 84: What to Watch
Page 86: Music -- Miranda Lambert Q&A -- for The Marfa Tapes, Lambert decamped to the quiet artsy town in West Texas and recorded songs around a campfire. She talks to EW about the album and being an introverted superstar
Page 88: Ear Kandi -- Xscape member and current Real Housewives of Atlanta star Kandi Burruss reflects on the hits she's made for Destiny's Child, *NSYNC, TLC and more
Page 89: The Black Keys
Page 90: Books -- summer books special -- a comedy of eras -- in a sharp new essay collection, The Wreckage of My Presence, actor Casey Wilson weaves big feelings into even bigger laughs
Page 92: Poetic Justice -- prolific romance writer and political powerhouse Stacey Abrams bookend an incredible year with more thrills, this time in her first novel not written under her pen name Selena Montgomery
Page 93: Author Spotlight -- Silvia Moreno-Garcia -- Velvet Was the Night
Page 94: Fatal Attraction -- inside the intoxicating depravity of Animal, Lisa Taddeo's meaty follow-up to Three Women
Page 95: Critic's Pick -- The Great Mistake by Jonathan Lee
Page 96: Critic's Pick -- In the Country of Others by Leila Slimani
Page 97: The Conversation -- Taylor Jenkins Reid and Paula Hawkins -- the names behind Daisy Jones & the Six and The Girl on the Train are coming for your beach tote
Page 98: Q&A with Zakiya Dalila Harris -- The Other Black Girl, former book editor Zakiya Dalila Harris' genre-bending evisceration of workplace privilege, is set to become the debut of the summer
Page 99: Critic's Pick -- Afterparties by Anthony Veasna So
Page 101: Q&A with Billie Eilish -- in between winning Grammys and releasing her sophomore album, the pop star is publishing her first (self-titled) book, a collection of never-before-seen pics of her early life on the road
Page 103: Parental Guidance -- your crib sheet on the best entertainment for kids from toddlers to tweens
* Q&A with Gabrielle Union-Wade and Dwyane Wade -- the actress and her NBA legend husband, bring it on with their new children's book Shady Baby
Page 112: The Bullseye
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haikyuuwifu · an hour ago
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Sorry this idea has been going through my mind for days and I can't help but post it!! I'll be updating soon in the official I just really need to write this down before I lose it! I hope you enjoy here is the first part!
AU Side Story 1
.......
Why is she asking me this?
"Why are ya telling me all of this are ya trying to put me in a bad mood?!"
I don't know what happened but what I said next I desperately wanted to take back
"Because I'm fucking pregnant!"
"Atsumu froze unable to register what was just said."
"Pregnant?"
"I'm pregnant with your child.."
She is pregnant? With my kid?
"Y-Yer W....What??
"I'm so sorry Tsumu.."
I broke down falling to my knees and sobbed.
"(Y/N)...."
Atsumu didn't know what to do so he just walked closer.
He was in shock and couldn't register the fact that she was apparently carried his kid.
He sighed with a shadowy breath.
"Get up (Y/N), bein' on to ground won't help our problem."
"I'm sorry.."
"Apologizing won't fix our problem (Y/N)."
He glared..
"Ya have a thing inside yer stomach that's apparently my kid."
He pushed me scaring me a bit.
"That thing doesn't bring anything good in this world."
"I know.."
My heart shattered.
"Yer not making me a dad or becoming a mom to that thing inside ya."
He pulled me up frowning.
"Ya gotta understand our future is in trouble and that thing is in the way."
I back up getting afraid when he suddenly noticed the fear in my eyes.
"I'm sorry don't be mad Tsumu."
He calmed down and hugged me.
"No, M'sorry I yelled at ya."
"Tsumu, I'm so scared yer not gonna wanna be with me my
friend anymore."
"This won't change anything between us okay?"
"You promise you won't leave me for good?"
"Why do ya say that?"
"I'm carrying your child and you said you wouldn't want anything to do with me."
I sobbed while he hugged me.
"S'okay M'here ya don't have to cry we'll take care of this problem."
"Problem?"
He nodded.
"Okay I trust you."
He picked me up while I instantly wrap my arms around his neck and sobbed while he rubbed my back.
"I don't wanna go home alone please stay with me.. My mama isn't gonna be home."
He nodded.
"I'll take ya home then."
..........
"I brought ya chips yer favorite from the kitchen."
I looked at the bag and nodded as he got on the bed.
"Yer gonna spend the night right?"
I asked while he nodded.
"Mhm ya seem to need me now more than ever."
I walked to the bed getting into it laying on his chest snuggling into it hearing his heart beat calming down instantly while he wrapped his arms around my waist hugging me closer.
"I will take care of ya relax and sleep."
"Thank you Tsumu."
......
3:00 AM
Atsumu woke up looking around and noticed she wasn't with then he got up half asleep.
"(Y/N)?"
He noticed the bathroom light on.
"Tsu-" she threw up.
Atsumu sighed and walked closer moving her hair out of the way and rubbed her back.
"Tsumu, I feel sick..."
He nodded and continued to rub her back.
"M'here just puke all ya want."
She nodded and continued to throw up.
This won't last long soon it will be taken care of ok?"
...
"Are ya done?"
She nodded.
"Okay brush yer teeth again ok?"
....
5 am
"Tsumu.."
"Hm?"
"My stomach hurts..."
He brought her in closer and rubbed her stomach.
"Yer ok just sleep Kay?"
She places her and on top of his.
"This is weird."
His eyes snapped open when he realized his hand was on her slightly bloated stomach.
"Yer belly has grown."
"Yeah."
"Tsumu..."
"(Y/N), we're getting rid of it ya know that right?"
"I do I mean like you said our careers are more important."
"Yeah."
Ok then now please stop rubbing my belly.
"Ah."
He quickly pulled away.
"Sorry I don't know why I did that."
"It's ok."
.......
The next day
The two looked half dead.
"Ya look half dead."
"Back at you."
.......
They ate lunch with the team and Atsumu seemed distant towards Miyako and sat closer to (Y/N)..
"Ugh.."
"(Y/N) are ya alright?"
He asked a bit panicked.
"No, I feel sick."
I got up covering my mouth and rushed to the restroom.
"What was that about?"
Suna asked.
"Is she ok?"
Ginjima asked.
"It's my fault."
"Why say that?"
Atsumu got up and didn't reply and just ran after her.
..........
Are ya feeling better? He said as soon as she walked out of the nurses office.
"Yeah I am a little."
He nodded.
"Relax this'll be over soon."
"Yeah right.."
"With The Abortion."
"We made the appointment to get details on that."
To Be Continued
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taegularities · 2 hours ago
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[!] fic announcement: songs about you | kth (m)
I: ‘RHAPSODY’
II: ‘SYMPHONY’
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Summary: Both of your touches used to fit your little agreement to fulfill your desires whenever you needed it - when had exactly these touches started to become a quiet whisper in the back of your mind that had you yearn for so much more than just careless nights?
PUBLISHING DATE: May 22nd, 8pm EST
pairing: CEO!Taehyung x music student!reader
rating: 18+
genre: fwb, childhood friends to lovers, somewhat idiots to lovers; fluff, angst, smut
warnings (for both parts): some talk about anxiety (about the future and jobs), swearing, lovesickness & crying :(, tae and y/n are so obliviously in love and he calls her ‘Swan’ T_T; explicit sexual content: soft dom!taehyung, oral (f. & m. receiving), handjob, fingering, multiple sex scenes, rough sex, soft sex, unprotected sex (reader on the pill, wbk), breast play, marking/biting (cos it’s me), praising (again, cos it’s me), ass grabbing, some masturbation during foreplay, making out, aftercare <3, the ending hurt me so good..., tae & yn being literal idiots, wayyy too many universe/stars metaphors again, appearance of a mcdonald’s *gasp* and kai from exo!
word count: 26k (13k for each part)
a/n: just look at this beautiful banner by @taemaknae​​. amazing, right? :') ANYWAY, small info: this will be a twoshot! aaaand the rest of the mentions will be there when i post the first part - for now, enjoy this 500-words-snippet! <3
part of the ‘Sons of Midas’-collab!
send me an ask or dm to be added on the tag list!
MASTERLIST | WIPs
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SNIPPET
"I want to get into that orchestra, Tae," you half-whispered, an almost inaudible sentence that he'd somehow, surprisingly still heard.
"You will. I've heard you play and you're good enough, Swan."
"What if I'm not, though? My classmates have been practising since they were in diapers. I just started four years ago and I-"
"Which is enough time," he interrupted, moving forwards and causing you to straighten your posture again. His eyes were heated, a passionate fire burning behind them as he gathered the words on his tongue. "It's not always about how long they've been playing an instrument. It's about willpower and passion, too - and you have an abundance of that, Y/N. You're amazing at what you do. And also, I really need to see you on Broadway!"
Your eyes widened, and you chuckled at his words, admiring the optimism he put into his statements; a clear indication of how much he wanted to cheer you up. "Too much. That won't happen. I'd be lucky enough to just be recognised by a small audience… can't talk about Broadway yet."
"But I recognise you. I always will. Does that mean nothing?" he whispered as he came closer, a palm settling on your cheek as he moved your head to meet your eyes. "I'll be supporting you all the way."
"Even if I don't make it?"
Your eyes were glistening again. The light shimmer in them was enough to make your voice shake, enough to affect Taehyung's heart in the most crucial way. Seeing you suffer and dwell in agony was comparable to a million terrible things in this universe, and your expression caused a heartache that had become too hard to ignore.
But even in your sadness, you were the most beautiful being he'd ever seen. And he wanted nothing more than to see the star in front of him shine.
"You will," he promised quietly, bringing his lips closer to kiss your cheek before he continued, “first you’ll be in an orchestra,” another kiss on your other cheek, “then Broadway," a small peck on your nose and a last, “and then you'll be a world-famous artist,” before he ultimately pressed his mouth against yours.
The kiss was soft - not hurried, not hungry, not impatient. Just a gentle pressure as he moved his lips against yours slowly, eyes closed and hands on your warm face with nothing in his mind but you; you thriving, you smiling, you existing.
And knowing that he was doing that for no other reason than simply wanting to made the wings of the butterflies in your stomach flutter wildly.
You didn't notice that the lights had started to shift the colour of the fountain water in front of you until you parted. And even then, you found it hard to look away from the brightest light in your surroundings, his eyes so lively and intense that you wanted to drown in them and never swim back to the surface ever again.
And with that in mind, the ache in your heart grew further.
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i’m so hella excited for thisssss!! if you liked it and want to support me, like/reblog or send an ask (+ do so too, if you want to be on the taglist!)
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marveloussupernerd · 2 hours ago
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Cuddles - Tsukiyama
This takes place after my truth or dare fic but you don’t need to read it to get what’s happening :) just fluffy tsukiyama at the Tokyo training camp
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I over-analyze this one clip a lot. His bed is way bigger than the others’? His sleeping position is so cute? I can’t get it out of my mind and thus, this happened.
Tsukishima Kei was always the last to fall asleep, and the first to wake up at the training camp. Not because he didn’t need the sleep, no, he needed the sleep more than ever now that he was staying up even later to practice with the fools in gym 3.
He adopted this sleep schedule so he could cuddle his boyfriend at night.
It wasn’t that he didn’t want anyone to know he was dating Yamaguchi, and he assured his boyfriend of that fact. In fact, the five boys he played truth or dare with earlier now knew he was dating Yamaguchi and he couldn’t care less. He just didn’t want to deal with the nagging from the team when they found out. Suga would want to know how he asked Yamaguchi out. Kageyama would make fun of him. Noya and Tanaka would gush about how cute they were. It was just a lot of work.
Their game of truth or dare had taken way longer than expected — even Tanaka and Noya (usually the last people to fall asleep) were out cold. Tsukishima and Hinata grabbed their stuff and went to shower off the sweat and humidity from the day. They were silent in the shower, Tsukishima still traumatized from hearing about how infatuated the boy was with the king. He was hurrying anyways, excited to finally be able to fall asleep and spend time with his sleep boyfriend.
He got out of the shower, getting changed into a random t-shirt and athletic shorts for bed, then running a towel over his hair a few times so it was damp, but not dripping. Nothing was worse than a wet pillow.
The two boys crept quietly into the pitch black, absolutely silent room. They stumbled around for a few seconds, eyes not used to the darkness, until Hinata fumbled around for his phone and turned on his flashlight so they could find their beds.
There was Yamaguchi, passed out, phone laying on his stomach as if he had fallen asleep while scrolling through it. Tsukishima shook his head, chuckling, then took his phone to plug it in in one of the outlets on the edge of the room. He was lucky Yamaguchi slept on the end, so he didn’t have stumble around too too much. Hinata, still training the flashlight on the ground for Tsukishima, gushed quietly: “Such a good boyfriend for Yams. Plugging his phone in. That’s so sweet!”
Tsukishima shushed him, making his way to his spot and flashing Hinata a thumbs up when he was settled enough for the flashlight to turn off. “Thanks Hinata,” he said under his breath, hoping the boy couldn’t hear him.
As though he couldn’t get any more superhuman, Hinata heard him, whispering back a you’re welcome and a good night.
Once the flashlight was off and Hinata sounded settled, Tsukishima proceeded with his nightly routine for the past few days. He pushed his mat over so that it was edge-to-edge with Yamaguchi’s. He took off his glasses, setting them on the floor, and laid down, situating himself under his blankets then reaching over to grab his boyfriend and pull him closer to him.
Yamaguchi grumbled, reaching over an arm to wrap around Tsukki, cuddling his head into his chest. “Tsukki?” He muttered, the only intelligible phrase leaving his mouth.
“Mhm,” Tsukki hummed quietly, kissing his boyfriend’s head. “Good night Tadashi.”
Yamaguchi shifted a little bit more in his sleep, throwing his leg over his boyfriend’s torso, trying to cuddle as close to him as humanly possible. It made Tsukishima laugh a little, but just hold him even tighter. He was adorable. He loved getting to cuddle with him after the end of a long day.
“Night," Yamaguchi grumbled. Tsukishima ran a hand through his boyfriend’s hair, gently pushing it out of his face.
“Night Yamaguchi!” Hinata whisper-yelled. Tsukishima face-palmed. Way to not wake up the entire team.
Yamaguchi, now almost entirely asleep, murmured out some syllables but nothing that made an actual thought. It was adorable. He had been working really hard during the week and clearly it had wiped him out. Hinata either didn’t hear Yamaguchi or chose not to respond, likely passing out pretty quickly.
Tsukishima basked in the moment, holding his boyfriend, enjoying the comforting weight of him cuddled into his chest. Everything was gonna be alright. Everything was getting better, thanks to Yams.
Tsukishima’s alarm woke him up early, reminding him to get up and get going. Tadashi had hardly moved from his position last night, still clinging to his boyfriend like a koala. Tsukki almost didn’t want to get up, but he knew he needed to. He gave his boyfriend a quick kiss on the head and decided it was time to pry himself out of his boyfriend’s grasp.
Despite having done this a few times the past few days, he was still getting used to it. He very carefully took his hands from around his sleeping boyfriend’s figure, reaching to grab the pillow behind him. He slid out from under his boyfriend quickly, sliding the pillow in Yamaguchi’s arms to take his place. His nose twitched in his sleep, but besides that it seemed like he hadn’t noticed the change, now cuddling into a pillow. He was adorable.
Tsukishima usually pulled his sleeping mat slightly away from Yamaguchi’s so they weren’t touching, just so nobody would suspect anything, but this time his boyfriend was right in between the two, and moving him would be way harder than the maneuvering he had just done.
It’s the last day of camp, and Hinata already knows, so everyone should know in the next hour, Tsukki figured. Might as well let him rest comfortably.
Yamaguchi was one of the last people to breakfast, plopping down his tray next to Tsukki and taking a seat by him tiredly.
“You look tired for somebody who slept a lot,” Tsukishima teased.
“I dunno why I’m so tired...” Yamaguchi flopped his head to rest on his boyfriend’s shoulder, but a second later, he was lifting it back up, glancing around to see if anyone had noticed. “Oops! Sorry Tsukki!” He rubbed the back of his neck. “I forgot where we were.”
“No, it’s okay.” Tsukishima scooted closer to his boyfriend, motioning that he could go back to how he was.
“Are you... Sure? But everyone...?” Yamaguchi’s cheeks were turning pink thinking about it.
“Yeah. I don’t care if you don’t.” Tsukishima shrugged. Yamaguchi paused. Tsukki scooted away: “You don’t have to though if you-“
“No!” Yamaguchi followed his boyfriend, leaning his head to rest on his shoulder as he let his eyes flutter shut. “This is nice.”
“The shorty overheard our conversation last night, so I’d say everyone will know about us by lunchtime,” Tsukki explained, his voice even and soft as to not jarr his half-asleep boyfriend.
“Well... that’s okay. I’m shocked nobody ever found out about us at night,” Yamaguchi giggled.
“What about night?”
Well that was an unexpected voice. He groggily opened his eyes to meet Suga’s curious ones. His face lit up bright red. He hadn’t noticed the older boy’s presence.
“Yams and I pushed our beds together at night,” Tsukishima said blankly.
“Aww that’s cute!” Suga reached a hand down to rustle both the boys’ hair. “You two are adorable. Make sure you finish your breakfast Yamaguchi. We’re going to start soon.”
Once Suga had left, Tsukki directed his attention to his boyfriend, a curious glint in his eye. “Suga didn’t seem very shocked.”
“Well... we have to talk about something when we’re on the sidelines.”
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survivorcrystalkingdom · 2 hours ago
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Finale Confessionals | "Divalicious" - Eve
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Okay so... my 'ahhhhh' alliance has almost made final 4 and part of me wonders if my best move is going with that alliance or not? I feel like after Lindy goes they are going to be going after me unless they do what I've been kind of hoping for and turn on each other for a better chance of winning. I'm playing around with the idea of talking to Eve and Lindy about maybe SNEAKILY going after Crow after all. I want to make a move that DOES NOT involve Jarod at this point in the game so that I'm not painted as a follower or whatever. The only thing that makes me nervous is that Eve might tell and I might be going instead of Lindy if I do try to go for this kind of move. I need something cute and flashy on my resume and I'm at the point in the game where I just want to be wild and have fun so maybe this would be a good move for me.
I don’t trust these people I really don’t. I think that some of them are trying to pull a fast one.... now to call them out on it or not...
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so im going home tonight <3
ok but forreal tho, this game has been a blast and although everyone's telling me it's 4-1 Lindy, my mind refuses to believe that - or that Lindy truly doesn't have anything to play (idol or legacy). regardless, people have started talking about endgame and FFC. and im ngl its very ironic/hilarious to me that i've been the target for a while now when A) i don't see myself being allowed into F2 with the remaining cast and B) don't see myself winning against the remaining cast anyway KAJSHFKJA like....maybe I'm completely deluded but i just am not seeing a path to victory, but that's okay! i don't have regrets and sometimes you just can't get it done. analyzing the F5 tho: Lindy - I've wanted Lindy out for a while now and I think she's wanted me out too so this feels like a grand, and fitting, ending to our narrative AJKSFHJKA tho if she does survive, I actually think her game has been pretty impressive, so I think she could win this game still. beyond that I hope she talks to me after the game nnnn Ruthie - Similar to Lindy except I don't think Ruthie and I have ever been at odds, we just finally started working together at merge. A true gem and sweetheart and I'm forever grateful for practically saving me at F8. She hasn't fully trusted me but she took a risk and shared info w/ me and I know it was probably just for game but it meant a lot. Eve - Eve and I had a great convo last night and even if Eve turns on me here, I think they've not been given enough credit for their additions to the game both strategically and just through the ~vibes~. Eve makes me crack up and kept the game as light as it could be for me even when it got dark heh. Jarod - i don't think i need to go too in-depth about this twink. Jess and RTP have heard it all, but I think part of me knows that the reason I'm not winning is bc I never cut him. And it's completely contradictory to how I normally play games - like TRUST i have cut my closest ally several times but idk. I tried something different with something new and I'm seeing it play out til the end. and frankly it's a lot less stressful??? not having to play "around" people and keep things secret and keep up multiple stories. i've just been myself w/ him, although i know he's hid things from me in this game, and it's been a form of inner peace and calming for me throughout this game. so yea it'd be cute if we managed to get F2 after everything, even it ends up being a 9-0 slaughter.
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Ah the final five. I like making it here because the challenges are so much fun! And these people are some of my absolute favorites. Eve and I have been together since the start, Ruthie I helped save at f13 and have adored ever since, Jarod is just my bff, and Crow is so cool! I hope they all know at this point that it isn't anything other than getting to the end as to why we vote anyone out- but everyone here is a power player! Can't believe I got to play with so many lovely people.
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So... the 'ahhhhhhh' alliance made it to the final 4!! I feel like this is a GREAT thing and now I just need to focus on who I think will take me to the end and who I could potentially win against in the end. I still wonder if I'm at the bottom of the alliance since they were all kind of working together before I came along but... even if I am the next to go they are going to have to turn on one another sometime and if I can help them do so, that is even better. Lindy going home was hard. I wasn't as close to her as I was to Shane and even Nic and Lindsay but her going home made me want to cry. My eyes are still wet and I just feel like crap. I don't know that this was my best move. Would I have won next to Lindy? More than likely I would not have but does she deserve to make it to the end? I think she does. I feel like the four of us that are left all have an equal shot at the end and are all equally loathed by the jury. If I was a juror I think I would vote for Jarod to win at this point because A) I worked closely with him all game B) I think he has the best social game C) He can win comps and he CARRIED our team through several comps in the beginning. Jarod has played a great game and as much as I would love to vote for him... I don't love the idea of sitting next to him at the end. Fun fact, I get down to the finals in these things a lot and I FREEZE and don't sell my game the way I should. I feel like ANYONE could sit next to me and beat me just because I'm not good at talking about my game or having all the attention on me and giving a speech that hypes myself up in general. I feel like my best chance of winning could maybe be next to Crow? I'm not sure how he does when it comes to jury questions or endgame speeches but I know I would not do so hot next to Jarod or Eve, just because I know they have the speech and question and answer portion of this thing in the bag.
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i'm in final four everybody JUMP! now i will perform being dragged to the end and being a placeholder WOOOO i straight up am just vibing. jarod had this long call with me like saying how sorry he felt if i felt forced to go to the end with him to just lose i said bby its been like that for awhile JKASHFKJSA idk i mean i hope i don't get 9-0'd but. i think everyone wants to sit next to me at this point which is pretty telling in itself. lindy was only after me bc she had a better relationship with everyone else left and was scared of me in comps so idk! i've had a lot of fun and i will be mr. irrelevant with PRIDE. (look at my autobiography title in my apps, third eye kinda snapped) but i really have had a blast, even with all the stressors, and i'm grateful to be live in the action as the game ends. i've made some awesome friends and it's done a lot for me <3
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I better get invited to the wedding when Jarod and Crow get married HEHEHE :D I'm in the process of watching FTC right now and I can't wait to see who wins! This has been such a fun season and it is bittersweet to see it ending. I have no idea who is going to win, I feel like it could be ANYONES GAME!
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bratz-kitten · 2 hours ago
Oh no I'm sorry about that 🥺 I think it's a good step in the right direction and even though I've only known you for so long I'm proud of you! Your mom will eventually come to terms with your decision and you'll be happier in the long run for sure! Keep your head up! ♥️
I'd be so down to play sims with you two! I don't have genshin on my laptop (and tbh I'm scared it'll crash my laptop cuz I heard it's pretty lorge) but I've heard so many good things from it I'm tempted 👀
🌱
NO DON’T BE SORRY i got over that so fast and now i’m back on my happy mood! YES honestly this was the right decision and i feel that in my bones so whatever happens now it’s meant to happen.
yes genshin takes up SO MUCH space and it gets so annoying sometimes but. it’s so worth it im so in love with the characters and it’s so fun building theories for them and then watching them become true. and the world-building is amazing. BUT THE SIMS WAS SO FUCKING GOOD FOR NO REASON i remember when i had the sims 3 and id play for hours and hours on end i could literally never get bored. so much you can do there. so many rich spouses to kill and steal their mansions. and when the robber would come in the middle of the night to your home IT WAS SO SCARY. and with the generations expansion pack you could have treehouses and shit and have so much stuff for the teenagers, like throwing house parties when the parents were away. and then the parents would come earlier and they’d have to finish the party fast as fuck or get grounded for DAYS. IT WAS SO FUCKING GOOD the sim 4 can’t compare but they have this wizard expansion pack that i’d kill to try
anyways im thinking about how me and maria now have absolutely 0 clue who you are. YOU HAVE TO GIVE US SOME HINTS FOR US TO PUT OUR LIL DETECTIVE HAT ON AND INVESTIGATE we both have pluto in the 8th if there’s one thing we love to do is DIG
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salspotentialgf · 2 hours ago
you’re writing is so good! how about more he’s off sal with his little sister? i love ur blog sm!!!
first, THANK YOU SM!! it means a lot when people like my writings, especially these days since I haven’t been so motivated to do so. Also i would like to throw this out there, since I’ve gotten asked more than once, I try to do gender neutral writings, so if I ever slip up and write out a pronoun that isn’t gender neutral, don’t hesitate to point it out! Also, I tried to make it more wholesome this time since the last one just slapped ya’ll in the face with angst. Here we go!:
When you both were little, you both had different colors for each other assigned by your mother. She would always try to buy matching outfits of different colors so you guys could look cute together. Sometimes even now when he goes out to buy things for himself, he’ll buy it according to his color, and if he can he’ll buy one of your color, just to remind each other of your mother. (if you know where I’m referencing this one from, I love you<3)
He remembers when you were first born, he fell in love with you right away. He wanted to take care of you all day every day. Whenever you cried at night, he would be at your side right away, trying and failing to make the formula while your mother looked at him with loving eyes.
He’s the type of brother to send you good morning messages and goodnight messages, tells you to drink water and eat when you have a chance, and lets you know that you’re loved.
He will support you through whatever. Breakup? He’s there. Coming out? He’s there. Wanting to play at the park at 3 in the morning? He’s there.
(So when I first got this request, they had told me from a 2-3 year difference, so if I ever say it this way, just know that’s what I mean) Once you finally enter high school, Sal will let you know about everything going on at school, and will hook you up with the best of the best. If you need a tutor, Sal’s got you. If you need help with a project, Sal knows a guy. He will do anything to make you have the best high school experience.
If you’re not at a good mental health stance, he will let you take the day off, and will pick up the work needed from your teachers, since they already know him. And if you’re feeling EXTRA terrible, he’ll do the work for you. You both have mastered each other’s handwriting just in case.
Since your father is busy most of the time, Sal Is your makeshift father. He’ll make food, even if it’s just something simple. He’ll tell you about the chores needed to be done at home, and if there’s anything planned for the day.
After he got comfortable with his prosthetic, he would let you write on it with washable markers, he even let you put little smiley stickers. Sometimes he would forget and go to his school looking like a little kid that discovered stickers.
The gang will always call you mini-Sal, or just something like Little Face. You don’t mind it, since they mean no harm and really love you like their own sibling.
If you had a bully, expect Larry to be there by your side. If he couldn’t beat up Sal’s bullies, he’ll make sure to beat up yours.
He knows how much you love his hair, which is why he always lets it long. But he makes sure to trim it to make it grow out healthy, and he even lets you play with it.
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justjessicastea · 2 hours ago
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Trigger Warning: Food, Eating Disorders, Body Dysmorphia, Weight (loss/gain), Depression
I've been getting a lot of questions about how to lose weight/foods to eat in order to lose weight and I wanted to kind of address everything and give you some insight on what i've gone through the past- nearly- two years. BUT you have to take the good with the bad so i'll address the bad shit first. Feel free to skip past the third paragraph if you don't want to read about the bad.
I want to preface this by saying: if you are wanting to lose weight because society or other people tell you that you need to, or you feel like you wont be loved or attractive until you lose weight, you are doing it for all the wrong reasons. If you want to lose weight because YOU want to- or for health related reasons, by all means I support it. But please don't think you have to be a certain weight or a certain body type to feel beautiful or attractive. This is not the case.
I know a lot of us are in the same boat where quarantine and this pandemic made us gain weight or lose muscle tone... etc. because we realistically couldn't do much and obviously quarantine is when I binge watched a lot of shows and made a lot of tik tok recipes (healthy and not). Because I couldn't go to the gym, I realistically didn't have any motivation to work out at home and then I gained quite a bit of weight. Thats when the body dysmorphia started and the lack of eating-literally nothing at all. I was basically just drinking coffee, protein shakes and water every day and working out like 2-3 times a day just trying to get back to where I was before. Nothing worked. I mean I lost a bit of weight but had absolutely no energy and my depression was just so bad. Because I wasn't eating much, I had a lot of temptations and I definitely binged way more than i'd like to admit, which put me right back to where I was. I wont go into more detail because i'm not proud of how I treated my body but I will give you some insight on the HEALTHY things I did to get back on track to where I was before. These things that I did weren't healthy and made me feel worse. Body dysmorphia fucking sucks but your mindset about yourself can change how you feel about your body.
Now for my weight loss tips and tricks. Disclaimer: this has worked for me and i'm not saying it will 100% work for you. Everyone is different and everyone's bodies react differently.
The most important part of losing weight is your diet. 80-85% diet, 15-20% working out/being active. It will not happen over night. There is no easy fix.
I found that measuring my body (waist, hips, thighs, arms, neck, calves) was mentally better than stepping on a scale. Every time I step on a scale, my mood plummets, even if i've lost weight. Take before pictures, measure your body and work towards an ACHIEVABLE goal. Small victories are important. Work towards slimming 1-2 inches off of your waist instead of wanting to go from a 10 pant size to a 4 in 2 months. 1-2 inches is achievable short term and you will feel more accomplished by meeting multiple short term goals.
I found that the thing that held be back the most was snacking (bad foods) at night. I try not to snack at night anymore but if I do, I usually reach for carrots, rice chips, rice cakes or grapes. Another huge thing that helped my munchies is getting a cup of ice with a packet of a powdered drink singles (crystal light, gatorade, celsius... etc.) with 10-15 calories. Pour the powder over the ice and eat it. It is literally the best snack to keep your mouth busy and it tastes good. But this is not a meal so don't substitute it for one. I also try to drink 5-6 tumblers of water per day. Lately I have been adding a spoonful of chlorophyll to 2 of them and its easy to do. In the morning, I do espresso with a pre-made protein shake and put it over ice. It tastes just like iced coffee and is a meal replacement. Although I do try to pair it with a yogurt bowl (greek yogurt, bananas, strawberries, granola, cinnamon and honey) or an egg on toast with everything but the bagel seasoning or sriracha. For lunch, I opt for something relatively heavy like sweet potatoes, cauliflower rice, chicken, beans, corn and buffalo sauce. So good but so filling. For dinner, I usually eat something lighter but still filling and I always snack at least 3 times a day between meals. That wont change. Sometimes my body just doesn't want me to eat more than once a day and when that happens, I make sure to drink smoothies and protein drinks with a few snacks. Listen to your body. If you want a chocolate bar or ice cream, eat it!!!! If you restrict yourself, you will binge 100x more than just eating one chocolate bar.
As for exercise, I usually go on the treadmill at night before I relax and do 12-3-30 (12 incline, 3 speed, 30 minutes) and every 5 minutes, I do 10 squats. Before I go on the treadmill, I do a core workout so my core stays engaged throughout the 30 minutes. This has been a lifesaver. I do what my body wants me to do but I try to work out 5 times a week. I add in pilates, HIIT workouts, running, yoga, sports... etc. every week but I wont work out less than 3 days a week. It's all about doing things that you don't dread. I love doing Pilates so I do it more often than HIIT workouts. I try not to do "leg day" and "core & arms day" because i'd much rather do a workout that targets my full body. I found that picking 4-5 workouts and doing 7-8 sets of 10-12 is more effective than choosing 10 exercises and doing only 3-4 sets at 8-10 reps. DO WHAT YOUR BODY TELLS YOU TO DO. MODIFY WORKOUTS IF YOU HAVE TO. DO THINGS THAT YOU ENJOY.
Every morning I also take probiotics (with magnesium), Vitamin C, Vitamin D, Zinc and Women's Multi Vitamins. I find this is super helpful, even if its a placebo. There's nothing wrong with taking vitamins and I kind of recommend it.
Nothing will change if you are not in the mental space to change it. A healthy mind is the most important part of having a healthy body. Losing weight will not make your problems go away. Your mental health is so important.
Please remember that you are so beautiful and you should only want to change your body for YOU and not anyone else. Your body does not define you and you are not unlovable because your body is different than someone else's. Instagram models' bodies are not real and you shouldn't compare yourself to them.
Be kind to yourself. Your body is yours and you should be proud.
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cookiefics · 3 hours ago
my bday is soon and I was wondering if u could probs write this for me🥺? a real cute fanfic of how levi would surprise his partner, like he pretends he forgets it and that makes y/n sad but he’s actually planning something big and bought lots of gifts, bringing thier close friends (Eren, Jean , mikasa etc) And in the evening he takes them to the cliff to see the view and he starts tellin y/n how much they love them (cuz they rlly wanna hear levi say that but he stutters and gets nervous while doin that) and just make them feel special 🥺 I’m all alone on my bday so writing this would absolutely make my day! (Plss add some fluff and cute scenes if u got any in mind!)
omg, first of all HAPPY BIRTHDAY! i hope this can be my present for you <3 ! i hope you have a good day! hope you like it!! <3
thanks to @breathes24 and @queko13 for the help ! (and the moral help)
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❁ levi x reader
❁ modern au!
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You feel Levi's body against you when you wake up. His hot skin close to yours. You turn around, facing him. He opens an eye and looks at you.
"Good morning." he says.
"Good morning" you say back. You look at the clock on his night table. It's your birthday. You smile at him and he closes his eye again, trying to sleep again.
"Aren't you forgetting something?" you ask. He thinks, his hand caressing your waist. He keeps his eyes closed. After a couple minutes, he opens them again. He looks at you.
"Nope. Today is your turn to make breakfast" He says, burying his head again on the pillow.
He always wakes you up with a lot of kisses on your birthday. But today, he just turned his head to the side and kept sleeping. You pout and take your phone. Nothing. Not even a simple message. You sigh and get up, leaving Levi on the bed and walking downstairs to the kitchen.
It’s not like you want everybody to focus on you and only you. But it’s late in the morning, almost noon, and you know half of your friends are awake. You start to prepare breakfast for the two of you.
At the same time, Levi takes his phone. The group chat named “Serious work stuff” is burning, full of messages. Obviously, that name is just a cover for the real issue of the chat: your surprise birthday party.
“Can we congratulate y/n now?” asked Connie an hour ago. Jean answered him with a huge “no”. Mikasa and Eren talked about the hour of the party and Sasha about the aperitifs. Levi sighs and answers when Connie asks where the party is and at what hour does it start. He is planning to make the party as early as he can, because he wants to take you to a night date, with a picnic. He invited all of them right after eating, when he plans to make you go to the store. Once you’re out and he knows that you’re far from home, he’ll let in all your friends, take out the balloons and all the gifts he bought for you and give you the best birthday ever.
But for now he'll just ignore the fact that is your birthday, even when he feels bad seeing your cute eyes getting sad. He's sure the surprise later will worth it.
You appear on the bedroom again with his tea and pancakes, also a juice for you. He sits on the bed after leaving the phone when he listened your steps. and you give him all the plates and glasses while you enter at bed once again. He kisses your cheek in signal of good morning when you sit next to him. Having breakfast in bed is a thing you two do on weekends since he moved with you. It all started because Levi has sleep issues, so he woke up really early and cooked for you, and now you do it in turns. He tries the pancake and hums.
"It's really good." he says, and keeps eating quietly. He looks at his phone again, the group chat making free talk on it. "Oh, look, we're in the middle of May already..." says, deleting the notifications and siping his tea. He looked the date and didn't remember your birthday?
The day passes by with normality: Levi makes some paperwork before helping you with the cooking and you two eat together. When you were about to move to the garage to take something, he went for you. You thanked him and he felt sweat pearls going down his neck, seeing how you were behind his back while he openened the door, the garage full of colorful balloons. You left to take your phone, that was ringing on the table of the living room. He used the time he was alone in the garage to tell everyone that he was about to send you to the store. All agreed in going to your house five minutes later.
"Baby." he calls you from the kitchen. "We haven't got peaches." he says. You raise an eyebrow. Since when is he so worried about peaches?
"And?"
"I know you like them, so could you go to the supermarket and buy a couple of them? I was thinking about having fruit salad for dinner." he says, his voice is a quiet as usual, but he's trembling inside.
"Just do it without peaches, Levi." you say, moving to the kitchen. He has his sleeves rolled up and is searching some fruits on the fridge, to know which of them he's going to use.
"It's not the same. Just go and take a couple, hm? You'll be back fast and I'll wait here for you."
You pout but he looks at you, closing the fridge and keeping the eye contact between you two. He knows he won when you sigh. "What type of peaches?"
Peaches. That's the fucking reason why you're walking towards the store in a day like this, and not spending your birthday with your boyfriend. You sigh.
"At least he knows I like fruit salad with peaches..." You enter the supermarket and search them, without knowing that now Connie's arms are full of beautiful balloons, Jean is helping Sasha to put the candles on the cake and Levi is putting all your gifts in the table near the sofa. Under Levi's commands, they are decorating every part of your living room to make it a beautiful place to celebrate your birthday. You entertain yourself on the candies and chocolates section and then buy a few of them to try. You're coming back home, sending a message to Levi.
He receives it and makes all your friends hide in the living room. "Jean, I can see your feet from here."
"That's because he's a fucking skyscraper." Connie says.
"At least I reach the higher shelfs on the supermarket, bald head." he answers, making sure his feet are now covered. Levi tells them all to shut up since he can hear your keys on the door. He leaves the living room to enter the kitchen.
"I'm home." you say. You can hear his voice from the kitchen.
"Welcome home." he answers quietly. You get closer to him, wanting his welcome kiss, and he presses his mouth against your forehead. You receive it happy, and you give him the supermarket bag with the things you bought. "I also took some tea mochis, wanna try them?" he nods.
"Cool. Wait for me in the living room." You nod. You make your way to the place, opening the pack and smelling them quietly. They smell delicious.
You almost drop all of them when you find all the balloons in your living. 
“Levi?” you ask, the emotion shining in your eyes. “What’s this?”
He appears smiling behind you. All your friends have the order to say happy birthday and come out of their hidden places when Levi congratulates you.
“Happy birthday, y/n”
“HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!” a lot of voices yell after him. You jump, scared by the repenting yells, but once you turn around you see all your friends coming from under tables and behind sofas. They are all there, smiling and wishing you happy birthday. You’re about to cry.
“Guys, you’re incredible” Mikasa is now hugging you and Connie is pulling your ears softly. Eren smiles quietly when you look at him, and Jean points Levi.
“You know we love to be praised, but this time your boyfriend was who got this idea. Sorry for not congratulating you before, y/n” 
“But...” you were speechless. He invited your friends and also bought a lot of balloons and things. Some tears started to form in your eyes and you felt how a hand took yours, pulling you towards a body that you knew really well.
"Happy birthday, my love." He whispers, making you blush from head to toes.
The little party was all fun and laughs, Connie told a couple anecdotes of all of you and Mikasa played cool music. Also, Jean and Eren bought a enormous cake full of tiny candles that you blew, wisihing to never lose this people. Levi looked at you so purely, how you were having fun and how you dragged him to dance with you. His beautiful grey eyes looking at yours. Then, all of them gave you the huge mountain of gifts they all bought for you, but you could easily recognize the ones that Levi packed, with precious ribbons and elegant letter.
Even when all those gifts were really good ones -and they all knew you didn't want them to spend on a gift for you.- the one Levi left for the end surprised you. It was the littlest of all, packed in a cute ocean blue paper. You took it, smiling at him. He was nervous. Maybe it was too much. It had a little letter on the top of it. "Please open me after the dinner."
"Oi, Levi, don't be like that!" Connie said. "Now I'm curious!" Levi looks at him raising an eyebrow, but he's smiling.
Some minutes later, they helped you two to put everything back on place, cleaning and all, even when you begged to them to go home.
"And let the birthday one do all the work? Nope." Jean said. "Eh, eh, eh, Sasha! Sto-" he left, seeing Sasha eating a piece of cake that "fell" from the top of it. You laugh and keep washing plates, with Levi by your side, drying them.
"A surprise party, hm?" you ask, your shoulder hitting his softly. He laughs quietly.
"I wanted to make something special for you." he whispers. You now remember the little gift that you're supposed to open after the dinner. Will you go out for dinner? Definitely, if you were having dinner there, you should be cooking instead of doing all of this slowly.
"It was special. Thank you." he smiles soflty.
"It hasn't ended yet." he whispers.
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Levi parks. You feel how the car stops. He insisted in covering your eyes, so you went all the way asking.
"Are we going to a restaurant?" he laughs and you hear the indicator sound.
"No."
"Are we... wait, where are we going?" It was late. All your friends left after helping. Jean had to drive Sasha and Connie home, so Connie sent a lot of pics in the car while he was copilot. Then, Levi appeared with that blindfold. You bited your lip.
"Put this on, please. We're leaving." Wait what? Leaving? For what?
"Leaving?" he nods. He takes a little bag near the entrance.
"Yep. Let's go." you followed him and he turned around, smiling. "Put it on, baby." you pout but let him put it on you.
And now he parked after a long way driving. He opens your door and helps you to get out. There's a wild wind and you can hear the ocean. You feel how the little pressure the blindfold was making dissapears on a moment. Levi has took it out. Since the sun is almost disappeared, you need a couple seconds to get your eyes used to the light. You're in the cliffs. Watching the sunset. Levi puts a blanket on the floor and tells you to sit. He takes out a couple plates and another one, that is covered, where he probably has the food.
"I thought maybe you would like to have dinner while the night starts to appear." he says, looking to the plates. Having dinner with such a pure human by your side while the starts start to appear above you feels like an absolute dream. You see how he eats a piece of watermelon. You smile at him, incapable of talking, and your eyes start to fill again with tears. "But don't cry" he says, pulling you towards him. Your face buried on his chest. "I love you." he says. Your eyes shot open and you try to part, but he presses your head quietly again to his chest. You can feel his heart beating fast. "I usually don't say this, you know. It's quite difficult for me to express myself, but you deserve it. You deserve to know how much you mean to me. I'll give my best to tell you every day how much I love you. Because I do. It's so deep, so deep..." He caresses your hair quietly. He takes the little gift from the bag. "You should open it now, don't wait to end the dinner." he whispers. You part a little and, before taking the gift, you take his face between your hands, caressing his cheeks quietly.
"Thank you." you were sincere. You were so grateful for having him. Not just today, that he prepared all those things, but everyday, having your back, giving you love and respect. He was near perfection, even reaching it. "Thank you, Levi. For being here with me and for making me feel so loved. I'll never end thanking you." You lean closer to him, pressing your mouth on his. The watermelon he tried before tastes sweet against your tongue. He buries his hand on your hair, pulling you closer to him. He parts for air.
"You should open the gift. And then have dinner. And we're not going to eat up each other, just in case you were going to make the joke."
You smile at him. He knows you too well. You open the gift softly, a necklace is shining inside the box. It has a little "L" on it.
"You know, that way you can always have a part of me."
"Are you Levi? Where's my grumpy and bossy boyfriend?" he laughs.
"I can switch to bossy whenever you want me to." he says. You give him the necklace and, tying your hair, you wait for him to put ii in your neck. You feel the cold L hanging on your clavicle. Levi presses his lips on your back, near the necklace. You show it to him and he smiles, caressing it.
You smile, the typical stupid and deep-in-love smile you've read on books. The sun keeps going down and the moon shines more intensely. The stars being witnesses of your smiles. The moon lighting the little L near your heart. You look at the sky, how beautiful it is full of stars.
He thinks the sky is beautiful, but you're the most beautiful thing for him. That's why he kisses your forehead, smiling at you. He put everything on the car right adter you two ended having dinner, just the blanket is left. You look at the stars, lying on the ground, and he does the same. You snuggle up towards him, his heat and arms receiving you. You kiss the point of his chest where you feel his heartbeat. He caresses your hair.
"Happy birthday." he says, once more. You smile against him and his hands wrap you.
You could stay like that forever.
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akvilenotfound · 3 hours ago
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part 3 of asks! part 1 part 2
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yeah i know he said that, what's why i found his behaviour so odd. he was saying how he thinks george doesn't try that hard, and in last night's stream george was genuinely try-harding, and dream kept sabotaging him it was just v weird. like i know ofc dream doesn't mean it, he praises george to the high heavens haha. but it just wasn't like very fun to watch him be like that when george was trying so hard to win :')
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it's just genuinely been so goddamn LONGGGG since we got solo george :( i know he probably prefers streaming with his friends it's more fun and what not but omg i really really want a solo stream! or maybe half solo, and then someone joins in the other half, as long as the vibes stay good
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bro he doesn't just have a comp sci degree, he got a FIRST, which is the highest classification you can get for a ba/bs. it's very impressive! i do hope he ends up doing a nice chill coding stream one day :D here at tumblr it's full of gogy simps, we appreciate his brains!
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haha ikr oh my god his tolerance is something else. georgeeee clink clink spare some change in the form of tolerance?? i need it so badly because mine is so insanely thin, i scream at my door if my clothing catches on the handle
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yeah this is always why i try my best to word myself carefully because i don't want to sit here and preach like i know what george is feeling. i don't need to defend george from his own friends and i have no plans of doing that :') but i am allowed to say how i, as a viewer, feel about what i saw and how i would feel in the situation! :) us getting a little upset about how george was treated is not the same as us going 'uwu gogy i wish i could hug him that was so mean dream is awful booooooo'.. it was just an unfair situation, and regardless we're allowed to project, and people are allowed to agree or disagree. we can all just discuss it in a calm manner :)
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yeah karl seems to be super busy atm, i've not seen him open up minecraft in forever i feel like! that would be the most hilarious team in existence oh my god i would love that :')
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yeah it can get very frustrating. not babying george should not mean you can insult him and put a joking or lighthearted tone indicator behind it. i feel like george's 'pretty privilege' is a double-edged sword. it feels like most people know him now for being the pretty one and a lot of people act like that's all there is. george fans get ridiculed a lot because people think we just watch him cause he's attractive. which is like??? why would i sit there for 2-3 hours of a stream just to look at someone's face? i literally sometimes just put on his calm solo streams in the background because i find his vibe relaxing, i don't even watch it. why would i do that if i only liked him for his face? he's not even my type anyway :'))) i just appreciate that he's a beautiful beautiful man, but i would never waste my time to watch someone just because of what they look like.
in general, people need to remember that these streamers are real people with feelings. and their job is on the internet, so they spend a lot of time on social media, and if you write a nasty comment about them, there actually is a high chance they will see it. i wish people just stayed respectful, and realised that their words carry weight :)
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yeah i think they struggle a LOT with streaming etiquette. i feel like after all this time, they are aware of how people perceive them (after having to point out several times that george can take a joke that it's not that serious etc etc) they know that people get a little upset at these things. i get maybe like in the moment if they're really high strung or just frustrated, they just do what they do and don't think about the fact that over 100k people are witnessing them do it. which yeah, i think sometimes their arguments or disagreements get too personal - and they are friends so they are fine with it, but we don't know their thought process, we don't know them the way they know each other, so we just see what's on the surface. and on the surface it often looks like a negative situation, and people get either worried or upset or frustrated.
because here's the thing - we watch streams to enjoy ourselves. george is my favourite streamer, and my idea of enjoyment isn't to see him trying hard to win at something and his friends sabotaging him, getting in the way and acting like he's incapable of achieving something by himself :') and a toxic vibe is just no fun to watch. i get that that's their friendship and like i'm not saying they should change anything about it - but there's nothing wrong with us venting, with expressing ourselves and releasing our frustrations. we are all allowed to feel different things. just because i'm not a fan of how george was treated, doesn't mean i'm trying to baby him. if i was babying him, i'd be @'ing dream and co on twitter and demanding he apologise lmao. saying i think it was unfair of them to say george was being carried when george was doing fine on his own is not the equivalent of babying someone.
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stxvercgersslut · 3 hours ago
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Love Without Doubt
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Pairing: Steve Rogers x Female Reader
Part 1: It’ll be over and I’ll Still Be Asking When
Other people mentioned: Natasha, Tony, Clint, Wanda & others
Warnings: Mentions of death, heartache, language like normal, angry reader, sad steve, dead Tony, smut in the future, pregnancy, a whole load of angst and a whole lot of fluff in future parts.
Description: Losing Tony Stark was the worst thing to ever happen to you. But finding out that you were 3 months pregnant with your late husbands baby hit the nail on the head. You were alone, heartbroken and Scared. Steve’s riddled with guilt, knowing you were out there alone and pregnant hurt him, how could he leave you like that? Exactly he couldn’t.
A/n: I know the pictures are of a white girl but this is by no means a white girl fic. In fact this is reader insert! Meaning that you get to imagine yourself in this fic as y/n, so I will not be addressing the colour of her skin because that is for you to do! :) I know that this chapter is just a short one but this is the prologue. I didn’t think it needed to be that long.
A/n: ahhhh it’s been a while. I’m sorry for my absence I didn’t really plan on writing this again. But after a lot of thinking 🤔 came to the conclusion that I honestly adore this fic too much not to continue it.
Positive.
Shit!
'No no no no no! Y/n this can't be happening right now! How on earth could you let this happen?' You screamed in your head. Just some of the thoughts that were running wild in your brain as you continued to stare hundreds of tiny little holes into the pregnancy test.
Tony had always wanted kids, ever since the pair of your had begun to date those long 7 years ago he'd been open with you about his longing for children. But now the moment you should have shared with your loving husband was shared with you and your reflection in the mirror. The man you loved would never get to meet his beautiful baby and that fact alone was enough to shatter your heart into slivers. There truly was no coming back from this pain.
How could this be happening right now? More importantly, how could this be happening to you right no! After everything you'd been through the world just wouldn't give you a break?!? With Tony gone how on earth were you even going to provide of a baby? Let alone looked after it on your own!
As these questions continued to race around your brain at 100 miles an hour, your hands began to shake uncontrollably whilst tears began to fall from your eyes. It was no surprise that you were understandably distraught with the cards you'd been dealt by the world.
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Despite your pain, Steve was going through heartbreak just as much as you were, completely traumatised due to being forced to watch one of his best friends sacrifice himself in order to save not only the world but also the universe it's self. Not only did he have the trauma but he also had the guilt of your pain looming over you.
Due to what he'd witnessed Steve would find himself experiencing nightmare after nightmare every single night, barely managing to sneak in any sleep before the images of his former best friend, Tony Stark, dying in front of him reappeared in his brain for what felt like the millionth time. It had only been 3 days since that dreaded day yet he'd been tossing and turning ever since. Living alone in his currant state was never a good idea. But since he had no one to help him through the PTSD he had to just struggle on through.  With all his failures coming back to haunt him it was tough but he had to try. Otherwise what was the point in anything?
As the early hours of the morning sunshine began to shine through his half open curtains, Steve jolted awake. Once again awakened by the deadliness of his nightmare. However, this time, unlike any other time, he woke up with an overwhelming sense of guilt towards you. His entire heart burning from what you must have been going through.  After all he knew exactly how close you and Tony use to be, how could he have been so cruel to rip that away from you when you'd been so happy?
Knowing that you'd be all alone in that huge cabin, alone with your thought eating you alive just like his were, truly didn't sit right with him. It was just in his blood to help people, whether or not they actually wanted his help was a different question but if someone was in distress, which he somehow had a feeling you were, he had to at least try and help.
Grunting, the still slightly panicked soldier stretched out his limbs, releasing all tensions from the night before as he did every morning even before the blip. It was just apart of his routine now and he'd never be able to stop that.
'Alright, time to get up I guess' the male mumbled to himself as his feet met the hard wood of his apartment bedroom floor. Ever since the blip Steve hadn't been able to stay at the Avengers compound, too afraid of having to relive all of those failures again. Now, with the compound completely and utterly destroyed, it was just an added reason for him not to go back there. Especially with everything that had gone on in there before.
He may have looked okay from the outside but on the inside? Oh he was a broken man alright. What did anyone expect from a super soldier who'd been through as much trauma as him?
As the male prepared his morning coffee his mind wandered back to you, wondering what on earth you could have been doing in a cabin all alone by yourself. Maybe you were still asleep in bed , shaking off all the loneliness and all the heart break with as much sleep as you could? If that was the case then maybe Steve could rest easier knowing that for the most part you were okay. Maybe he would have been able to forget about you if he knew for certain that you were able to slip into a state of peace when you fell asleep.
But for some reason Steve just couldn't shake the idea of you maybe crying yourself to sleep every night. Or even worse, what if you were listening to that damn hologram again? Or his voicemail again? What if you still hated him? Oh he had to put this right.
Deep down Steve knew you hated the way that he'd handled things, the way he'd brutally dragged your husband away from you. Bursting the bubble surrounding the two of you in the process. But if there was any possible way that he could put all the heartbreak right and ease his Conscience in the process then he had to try right? No matter how much you hated him right now he knew that you'd need a friend right now.
So without a second thought, the super soldier poured his morning coffee into a travel mug (one Bucky had bought him one year), threw on a t-shirt and jeans, grabbed his leather jacket as well as his keys and left the house. There just had to be a way to put this right.
As Steve made his way to the cabin that used to be shared by you and Tony, he couldn't help but lose himself in deep thought. Struggling to comprehend how life had just fucked everyone over so awfully. Yeah they managed to get their lives back and bring everyone home in the process. But what good was that when Tony didn't arrive back home to you safely? What use was bringing all the blipped back when Steve had to explain to you that your husband was never coming home. The world was cruel, that he knew for certain.
It hadn't taken him more than an hour to finally arrive at your cabin, sucking in a deep breath as he slowly exited him car and made his way up to the front door.
Was he really about to do this? Was he really about to attempt to talk to you even though he knew that you most likely hated his guts?
Apparently so since his he curled his hand into a fist and gently knocked on the door, staring is hung that he could hear the sound of joyful laughter. But in reality all he could hear was painful sobs. That was the hardest part, hearing you sob was already breaking his heart. It was times like these he truly did wish that his hearing wasn’t as strong as it happened to be.
With one more breath, Steve finally pulled himself together and knocked 3 times, hoping you’d opened the door for him.
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You'd been so caught up in your emotional agony that you'd barely had enough time to hear the first couple knocks, but by the third knock your senses seemed to finally come back quick enough to only slightly hear the very last knock.
After straightening yourself up a little you finally made your way towards the door, dreading the panic attack that was most likely coming your way after everything you’d gone through. However, nothing had prepared you for who you found at the door upon opening.
“Steve?” You groaned almost angrily; practically spitting it out.
Tags: @jtargaryen18​ @chuckbass-love​ @et-lesailes​ @harrysthiccthighss​ @cevans-fics​ @dwights-new-plague @sweetllamaparadise
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