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#found out about it after watching several youtube videos
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I watched James Somerton's final video, and all I got was this 6 page document
As soon as I learned his final unreleased video was on Revolutionary Girl Utena, I knew I had to hate watch it. I didn't know that I'd spend the following 4 hours making a comprehensive doc on everything I hated about it. But here we are.
The TLDR (is this too long to be a TLDR?)
The intro section, as well as Part 2, are directly plagiarized from wikipedia. The rest is unclear.
He makes a “haha this show is so weird right guys” joke 10 different times
He reads Anthy as so emotionally stunted she literally has to be taught how to think for herself, and believes that being the rose bride makes her feel good
He says that his reading is ‘vastly different” from the rest of the community, before boldly stating that this is because he sees it as a “deeply allegorical and symbolic story”
He sees the sexual abuse as “not to be taken literally”
Insists that the show be separated into parts that are strictly literal and strictly allegorical for the entirety of parts 3 and 4, before making the contradictory move of analyzing characters as allegories during part 5
The only characters that get dedicated sections are Akio and Dios, who he doesn’t believe are the same person. 
He says Dios gets his powers by “deflowering women”
He calls Akio, known child predator, a chaotic bisexual
Uses 14 year old SA survivor Anthy’s passive personality to make a joke about her being a bottom
His final point is that Utena was the real prince all along
There are no citations
Anyway, full version for people who hate themselves under the cut. With time codes, because I cite my sources.
Part 1: Intro
This entire section is almost exclusively quoted from the Wikipedia article for Revolutionary Girl Utena. Words have been changed, but the order at which certain topics come up is not. Highlights include:
0:56 In his introduction of Be-Papas, lists the founding members in literally the exact same order as Wikipedia.
1:40-2:00 His list of Be-Papas previous works is lifted entirely from wikipedia, only with the words changed. This leads to a strange moment at 1:52 where he claims Be-papas ‘lent their talents to’ Neon Genesis Evangelion, a show which started production at least a year before Be-papas was founded. On the wikipedia article for Utena, this is instead referring to the previous work of Shinya Hasegawa and Yōji Enokido
4:23 he uses a quote by Yūichirō Oguro describing the production as a “tug of war”. He seems to have lifted this in its entirety from Wikipedia, as he does not cite the actual source it is from (the box set companion book, btw)
As for James Somerton originals, at 0:44 he claims that out of all magical girl series,”none to my knowledge have been more discussed and dissected than the 1997 series Revolutionary Girl Utena” He will go back on this at 5:05, where he states that “Sailor Moon takes the lion’s share of discussion” in regard to influential magical girl anime
Part 2: Part 1
(At least I know I’m not funny, unlike James Somerton)
Speaking of which. Here is every single time he makes a “wow this show is sooooo weird you guys” joke: 6:00, 8:50, 10:40, 10:58, 13:46, 17:07, 24:16, 30:34, 41:19, 48:01
Here’s every time the punchline to the joke is the existence of Nanami, a character who he otherwise completely disregards: 10:56, 12:05, 16:22, 42:40
6:16 Claims that the “Apocalypse saga” and “Akio Ohtori saga’ are two names for the same several episodes, depending on the release. This is untrue. Instead, different releases either only have the Apocalypse saga, or split the episodes into an Akio Ohtori saga and then the Apocalypse saga. 
7:58 Claims Utena intervening on Anthy’s behalf begins the first duel. While this happens in the movie, Touga intervenes in the scene he uses clips from (like literally right after the shot he uses in the video). Utena only gets drawn into the duels when Wakaba’s love note to Saionji is posted. Youtuber Noralities’ Utena video also gets this wrong, which makes me wonder if this was copied.
9:09 Claims Akio’s “End of the World” moniker is actually more closely translated to “Apocalypse”. In reality, the translation moves away from a more apocalyptic reading, with 世界の果て (Sekai no hate) apparently translating closer to “the furthest reach of a known world” or “edge of the world”. (Love the implications of this translation, but I digress)
9:10 As can be assumed from the previous point, this means I can’t find any sources that point to them not using the title “apocalypse” for religious reasons
10:10 Uses Anthy’s extreme passivity under her Rose bride persona to make a top/bottom joke. I’m gonna repeat this in case you’re just skimming. He uses a trait that likely stems from years of abuse, (possibly exaggerated by the persona Anthy uses to manipulate people), and uses it to call her a bottom. 
He also just doesn’t seem to understand how the whole point of Utena constantly telling Anthy that she's just a normal girl who should make more friends is framed as Utena imposing her will on Anthy, just as much as the previous Engaged have done. 
11:54 Apologies in advance for my most “um, actually!” point yet, but technically his statement that Anthy stops being host to the Sword of Dios is wrong. Akio literally pulls a sword out of her chest in the final duel. It's a more evil-looking sword of Dios, granted.
13:02 !!! CANTARELLA SCENE ALERT !!! He interprets it as them fighting over Akio?? Which like. I will allow people to have their own interpretations of vague and symbolic scenes. I will. I swear. This is not technically incorrect. It just makes me want to eat my own intestines.
14:44 Bad Anthy take #1: He states Anthy “is emotionally stunted to the point where she needs people to make decisions for her because she does not know how to think for herself” This ignores several moments of Anthy clearly making her own choices throughout the show, including the suicide attempt Somerton mentions about a minute prior. This also strips Anthy of what little agency she has throughout the story, usually exerted through messing with Utena or Nanami. (The fact that she repeatedly makes choices that contribute to her own abuse is, in my opinion, one of the most interesting parts of her character, and it's a shame that Summerton’s ‘reading’ of the story completely disregards that)
Additionally, he once again reads Utena ‘urging Anthy to think for herself” in the first arc as an unambiguously good move, and not as something critiqued in the show.
14:52 Summerton reads the Swords of hatred as symbolizing men’s hatred specifically. Again, I’m trying not to completely disregard differing interpretations to a show like Utena, but this feels very simplistic, especially considering the harm we see aimed towards Anthy by other women
16:42 Here he claims that his reading of the story seems to be “vastly different” from the bulk of Utena discourse. What is this reading? That the show shouldn’t be read literally. Or, in his words, “[we can interpret] Revolutionary Girl Utena as a deeply allegorical and symbolic story about the struggles of coming of age amidst widespread institutional corruption in a high school and which describes a passive culture of inaction in regard to brazen instances of domestic exploitation in which there is not only a question about the caporeality of the events transpiring but also which events can be taken for granted and which events are meant to signify abstract sociological institutions.” The idea that he believes this is in any way a new reading of the material honestly baffles me.
Part 3: Part 2
17:48 through 18:50 differently quotes the Wikipedia article for postmodernism. He even makes a joke at 17:55 about Wikipedia. Please kill me. 
The first three themes he lists at 19:11 are just the three main themes listed on the Revolutionary Girl Utena Wikipedia page. What was that about a “vastly different” reading, James?
You’re gonna have to take my word for it, but this section is so short because it's just him talking about the various ways the story can’t be taken literally. He does, ironically, call this a hot take.
Part 4: Part 3
Here’s where the reading falls apart folks
At 23:15, he states that some things in Utena are allegorically coded, while others are to be taken literally. This is true. However, he seems to take this to mean that some parts of the show are Strictly Literal, while others are Strictly Allegorical for things going on in the Literal World. 
This is apparently why he prefers the Anime to the Movie, where there basically is no separation between the Literal and Allegorical
This take is bizarre to me for several reasons, but here is my favorite. At several points, he mentions how Revolutionary Girl Utena is a work of Magical Realism. Magical Realism is literally defined by its blending of the “literal” and “allegorical”, the mix of fantastical elements in a mundane, realistic setting. This idea of the impossibility of a blurred line, that Utena must either have lore where the magic is all real and means nothing, or dedicated allegory segments quarantined from the rest of the story, is contrary to the very idea of Magical Realism.
I can’t help but wonder if Somerton took his mentions of Magical realism from a previous work, due to how little it is consistent with his final argument. Either way, this section suggests a great lack of creativity in his analysis, a shame for such a creative work.
24:36: Shiori slander, for those who care
After this he gets really worked up about people assuming symbolism in everything, even when the author ‘doesn’t make it clear something is symbolic’. He shuts down a reading of a shot in the Lord of the Rings. Miley Cyrus is there? Very The Curtains Were Blue of him. 
28:22 Claims that Wakaba is the key to telling where the Strictly Literal segments end and the Strictly Allegorical segments begin. He states that, under this lens, deeply personal moments of character suffering such as all of the sexual abuse and Anthy’s suicide attempt (which he literally cites) should be read as symbolic and be “approached with uncertainty rather than confusion”. (28:24-29:13)
This also somewhat falls apart when you consider Wakaba is the jeep in the movie's car chase
And then he rants about people not liking his Attack on Titan video for a bit. Since its potential symbolism also doesn't follow hard enough rules to be symbolism. Once again, the separation of “fact vs allegory” I haven’t watched AOT, so that's all I’ll say.
Part 5: Part 4
Thank god this part is short. Much like Dios’ on-screen presence.
32:55 Makes the extremely bold claim that Dios is not Akio. As in, never even became Akio. because Dios is Strictly Allegorical.
Just to be a pedant, this is pretty explicitly disproven in the show
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Confusingly, both earlier and later he will address these two as the same character. 
33:04 he also explains the root of Akio’s name in a tone that suggests this is supplemental information and not like. Literally something he explains out loud in the show?
Part 6: Part 5
This section is nearly entirely about Akio Ohtori. I would like to note that him and Dios are the only characters with dedicated segments.
38:30 The part where he states that Dios gets his powers from deflowering women.
38:46 Claims, once again, that Akio’s abuse of Anthy “may not be literal”. 
38:59 “the instance of exploitation here is used because assault has deep roots as indicating that akio's gender is the source of his imbalance”  THE ASSAULT IS ABOUT AKIO NOW???
39:45 Bad Anthy take #2: “Anthy’s conformity to the Rose bride is based around the fact that she feels good being subservient because this is the only thing in her life that has ever brought her any kind of positive reward”. This is a direct quote. Anyway, I can’t think of any instances in the show where Anthy’s subservience gives her a positive reward, except maybe when she’s intentionally using it to manipulate others. As for her feeling good being the rose bride. She tries to commit suicide. Dude.
Side tangent, but isn’t this exactly what Akio says during the final 2 episodes? That Anthy enjoys being a witch? Is the main villain, who consistently says things during that very episode that are blatantly false, our source of information for this take? I guess so, since this is the dedicated Akio section.
At 40:20 he decides to introduce the concept of Anthy, Akio, and Utena as stand-ins for wider concepts, which is antithetical to his approach in analysis beforehand
Part 7: Part 6
42:40 he finally acknowledges that he’s been spending too much time talking about Akio, and literally no time on characters like Nanami
46:10 states that Utena’s exclusive motivation “is to protect Anthy from the predatorial intentions of the other dualists”, which disregards the fact, which she states herself, that she was largely participating in the duels and protecting Anthy to feel like a prince
48:04 The part where he says that Akio has ‘chaotic Bi vibes’ in regards to him sleeping with Touga, who is 17 and implied to be a long-term victim
Part 8: Part 7
54:01: His concluding point is that Utena was the real prince all along. 
In true Somerton fashion, the video then ends over a scrolling wall of patrons, with not a single citation in sight.
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thankskenpenders · 3 months
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Happy new year, everyone! Welcome to 2024, the year that will mark the 10th anniversary of Thanks Ken Penders. I'd like to go over my plans for the blog for this year.
First of all: in the very near future, I'll have a post with my thoughts on Sonic Dream Team, and I'm sure I'll write one last Sonic Prime review once the final episodes drop on the 11th. I've also been sitting on an unfinished piece about the Sonic LEGO sets. I wanted this to be longer and more detailed piece that not only reviewed the sets but also went into the weird disconnect between homogenized image of Sonic the Brand and the actual fiction it's based off of, but it'll probably end up getting cut down a lot just so I can put something out. Let's just say I did a fun little thing with one of the sets.
Second: yes, I would like to return to regular TKP updates this year. As I've said many times, I wanted to do this in 2023, but I've been suffering from creative burnout after finishing SLARPG and have generally been unable to focus on any of my creative goals this past year. I'm hoping that this year will be better and I'll be able to get back into the swing of covering Archie Sonic issues. Even doing one issue every week or so would be vastly preferable to continuing the hiatus. I'm still only halfway done!! But aside from burnout, my other main hurdle is that I need to reread my own archive to refresh myself on all these things after nearly three years away. This will take some time.
The thing is, though, this year I'll have an extra incentive to go back through my previous writing and brush up on all things Archie Sonic. Because you see...
I've decided that I want to make a video essay about Penders. The comics, the copyright battle, The Lara-Su Chronicles, everything.
The why
I've thought about doing this before, but I never committed to the idea. I was too busy with gamedev, or I thought it'd end up being too long, or I figured that there were already enough videos on the subject, or I just lacked confidence in my ability to put together a video essay. So I told myself it wasn't meant to be, and let the multiple YouTubers who have cited me as a source on their own Penders videos fill that void.
Recently, though, a few things have happened that have convinced me it might be time. For one, YouTube video essays/media retrospectives/etc. are just getting longer and longer. When Quinton Reviews is out here doing 21 hours of videos on Sam & Cat, a subpar Nick sitcom that only lasted one season, I don't feel so crazy for wanting to make a video about several hundred comic books and two lawsuits that'd be at least an hour or two long lmao. Admittedly, I've also been self-conscious about doing a long video essay like this as a trans woman who has yet to do any vocal training. But these days I feel like I see a lot more transfem YouTubers who have done little to no vocal training, and that's given me more confidence on that front.
But the big one was Hbomberguy's recent plagiarism video. As I sat there watching it, I kept thinking about the time I found a CBR article that was just a crude 800 word summary of my two previous articles on Penders, published by a CBR writer who's put out over 4000 articles since 2019. If I've already been plagiarized before, and my writing is so frequently passed around as a go-to source on Archie Sonic drama, then I wouldn't be shocked if there were YouTubers out there straight up just plagiarizing me. I don't watch other peoples' videos on Archie Sonic, so I'd never know! So if people are just gonna paraphrase me when covering these topics anyway, why not take matters into my own hands and make what I would consider to be the definitive video on the subject? If hacks like James Somerton and iilluminaughtii can churn out these shitty video essays and people will still watch them, surely it can't be that impossible to make my own, right? (And also, uh, Hbomb literally told me I should make the video lol. If you're reading this, thanks for the encouragement.)
The what, how, and when
So here's the plan.
Part of this video essay will be an adaptation of my Medium article on the recurring themes of Ken's Archie Sonic run, with its content touched up and expanded upon. There were a few things I skimmed over in the article because I didn't want it to get too long, but again, people are out here watching ten hour videos about bad Nickelodeon sitcoms now. I can get away with elaborating a little more. I can add a few paragraphs talking about the Chaos Knuckles arc, or throw in a little more historical context I've discovered in the years since.
After covering the comics, the back half(-ish?) of the video will be dedicated to the copyright battles and their ensuing controversies, trying to give an accurate picture of what actually went down, the sheer scale of how bad Archie fucked up, and what our takeaways should be. This will have some similarities to my New York Magazine article on the subject, but I'll be rewriting it from scratch. I REALLY had to keep things short for that article because I was already way over the expected word count, and my tone was a little more straight-laced than normal because I was trying to keep things Professional. I can riff more and insert more of my own opinions this time, like I normally would.
I'll inevitably have to touch on some of Ken's Bad Tweets when discussing things that have happened after the lawsuits, but I don't want the video to just devolve into a list of times people got mad at him on Twitter, so I'm gonna try to keep that to a minimum in favor of focusing on his actual work. Things like the Scourge the Speed Demon incident and his continued statements on certain characters' copyright statuses probably warrant mentioning, though. And finally, assuming that the book really does come out this summer, I would like the grand finale of the video to be about those first couple chapters of The Lara-Su Chronicles.
I don't currently know when this video will get done, but it'll probably be in the back half of the year, especially with me waiting for the book to either drop or get delayed yet again. But I've actually already started writing a bit of the script, and will keep chipping away at it for a while.
So, uh, yeah, look forward to that? Wish me luck?
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ellieswifie · 7 months
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︿︿ ੈ[ ⛸️ ] ༉‧₊˚✧
icebreaker | matt sturniolo
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♪ reflections — the neighborhood
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summary: after an amazing ice skating performance your entire body breaks down and you start having a panic attack. but your boyfriend is right by your side...
warnings: boyfriend!matt x ice-skater!reader, angst, panic attack (reader), profanity, fluff towards the end, one sweet kiss, slightly rushed
authors note: fun fact, this was actually based on a dream i had a few weeks back. i have this weird thing where if i have a dream i loved and or cared about, i write what i can remember in my notes... it's not healthy but i have no regrets.
˗ˋ.*✧·˚ ೃ࿔₊•
THE APPLAUSE WAS LOUD. your shaking hands held high in the air as you finished you beautiful ice skating piece you had been working on for months. the crowd screamed and whistled for several seconds as the judges rises for a standing ovation.
but your eyes stared high at the ceiling, having the gut-wrenching feeling that your performance was terrible. your legs weren’t strong, your posture was lazy, and your turns were absolutely shit. you let your hands drop to your sides, as the crowd's loud whistling fades out your mind. you gracefully leave the ice rink, receiving looks from other opponents and trainers.
your body felt shaking and weak as you walked to find your bench along the line of the audience, but your mind couldn’t focus, your thoughts weren’t processing. you looked weak, your performance was weak. negative thoughts crowded your head, and everything just felt foggy and fuzzy.
but when your eyes slowly faded back to focus, your coach reached over hugging you in her arms. she had whispered sweet nothings as you found yourself just clinging onto her.
she quickly pulled away when large hands found your waist, pulling you off the ground and into their arms. you immediately recognized the warmth of the larger figure. matt sturniolo.
your amazing boyfriend since high school. you weren't too surprised he showed up to support you. you've been through thick and thin with him and filming youtube. you both were so supportive of each other it was incredible how far you guys had come.
having his warm sent crowd your head had made your anxious feelings only go away for a second. your mind was filled back with the negative voices in your head when your boyfriend placed you back on your feet.
"you were fucking amazing!" nicks voice echoed behind matt. you tried smiling at your boyfriend's brothers coming over to give you their quick hugs, but your entire body just felt numb, lifeless. matt hadn’t noticed how you weren’t processing anything at first. he was smiling between you and the scoreboard waiting as judges proceeded to put in your score.
chris had reached between matt, pressing a large video camera in your face. you quickly flinch having your hands fall from your control. "guys, y/n is a fucking beast!" chris claimed, holding the camera. naturally, you weren't too fazed with a camera in your face. you and matt's relationship wasn't public, but many people knew and enjoyed you on the sturniolo's channel.
but having the camera so close to your face at this moment made you quickly panic. and matt was quick to notice. he watched as your face was full of fright, and how your hands were shaking uncontrollably. you weren't even sure why you felt so shaking and in panic but you matt's eyes glazed you entire face catching your frighten look.
"chris get the camera out of her face." matt said trying to maneuver himself in front if you, but chris stood confused. "what?" he muttered, lowering the camera slightly, but staying in his spot between his brother and you.
"get the camera out of her face." matt nearly shoved his brother out of his way as he moved to hold your shoulders. your eyes shifted, becoming watering from the thick air. your hands shook to rise to hold matt’s, but your entire body felt out of control.
"breathe, breathe," he whispered, easing his face closer to yours. but you couldn’t breathe, you felt like your entire body was drowning in your sweat, and disappointment, you felt weak and vulnerable.
your eyes glanced around you receiving several looks from the girls who had performed before you. you could just hear their thoughts. what is wrong with her? she can't even skate? she looks horrible.
you were quickly brought back to reality when matthew quickly rushed you towards the bench nearly by, placing you down first, then letting himself kneel in front of you. your breaths were heavy as you tried carrying words out of your mouth, but matt’s hand on your chest stopped you. it was comforting knowing you weren’t alone, but your entire mind said you would always be alone.
you shook your head, trying to cancel the horrible thoughts when matt pulled your face into his neck. "it’s okay, i’m here." you tried listening, but you just couldn’t. your breaths got heavier, your hands shook fast, you weren’t in control of your own body and it frightened you.
it frightened matt and his brothers, mostly matt. he wanted to help, he has suffered from these panic attacks in the past. it's terrifying and knowing how scared you are is breaking him. "just focus on my breathing, what do you hear?"
you pause nudging your head into his neck. hearing his slow breaths, sweet nothings, the echoed clapping from the stands. you place your shaky hands in his and he holds them. tight. he's assuring you while you try finding words- anything.
"i-i hear you..." you choke out. tears fall down your face falling onto matts bear skin. his entire body shivers causing you to lean off him to face his face. you needed to see him. "i hear you."
"because i'm right here." he raises your interlocked hands and kisses the back of your hand. "your not alone. i'm here- nick, chris..." your eyes dart to your coach who is carrying a gatorade water bottle and a hoodie. the hoodie belonged to matt. you borrowed it a while back but refused to give it back.
you can't hear anything anymore, you only hear matt and the sweet assuring words he's saying as he rubs circles on your hand. it's like your entire body clicked back into focus when you feel your breathing pick back up and your negative thoughts blow away.
matt's head looks back at you and a small smile plays on his lips. it's a small gentle smile. one that kills you every single time you look at him. "you okay?" he asks softly, unlocking your hands so he can rub your jaw softly.
you feel embarrassed.
you completely panicked in front of everybody. you cover your face in matt's chest hiding the way your cheeks quickly turn red. "i'm sorry..." you muttered.
matt rubs shapes around your exposed skin on your back. "about what?" "acting out in front of all these people." you whispered into his chest.
"don't feel sorry it's not your fault." you lean off his chest and look at him and he's still smiling. "you were amazing."
you want to cringe at how adorable he is, but you know you guys are just like that. you guys enjoy complementing each other and looking at each other for hours. "you are amazing." you poke your hand at his chest, hiding your blush "thank you for helping me..."
"no fucking way!" you hear chris shout from behind matt. you both turn your head to look at chris and nick jumping up and down like children. "what?" you inquire, drawing your eyebrows together. "you got a perfect score! you're in first place!" nick shouted, pointing up at the large scoreboard.
you eyes go wide at the screen. he wasn't wrong. it was right in front of your face, a perfect ten large in red letters. you couldn't believe it.
you look at your boyfriend smiling wide as you gives you that look. the you're amazing, you're incredible, i love you more than anything look. his head tilts to the side and you can't help but laugh at his happiness.
"see..." he drags out, leaning into you slightly. "you're amazing." you both are giggling at each other before he draws you close and places a soft kiss on your lips.
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dovakiinwitcher · 1 month
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Batfamily As Interactions With My Own Siblings
- Call and response with quotes or song lyrics. Dick and/or Steph use this most often since most of their siblings are angsty (Jason, Tim, Damian, Cass), so this forces them to acknowledge them. To not respond is of the HIGHEST offense.
- Sometimes Damian, or Cass, will come flying out of nowhere to surprise attack one of their siblings. Frankly, all of them do this, but those two are most common. Poor Duke is always the most caught off guard, in spite of his powers.
- Tim is almost always the last one down for dinner. Sometimes, he doesn’t even come down until after everyone else has eaten. Alfred is always kind enough to leave a plate for him to reheat. One time, he found that plate on the floor beneath a laundry basket that was propped up by a stick, cartoon-trap style. His siblings were hiding around the corner, watching him intently.
- Jason sometimes gets distracted in the bathroom, picking at scabs or old scars on his face in the mirror. His siblings (particularly Damian) get really pissed if they've heard the toilet flush and still have to wait for ten minutes to use the bathroom. (Jason has pointed out that there are other bathrooms. This doesn't prevent him from getting yelled at.)
- Duke has been known to go on fierce literary rants to Jason. Most recently about a certain shitty book he had to read for school.
- Tim started a DnD campaign with Dick, Barbara, and Duke. The party got sidetracked going undercover as an "exterminator" company, and helping a poor milliner jumpstart her hat business (don't ask how those were related). Tim is scared that they may have completely forgotten their original quest.
- Sometimes Steph forgets who she's told something to, and will repeat information to people who've already heard this from her.
- Jason, on the other hand, will forget what he HAS been told by people, and infuriates people with his questions of things he's already "had this conversation about."
- Bruce has repeatedly told Damian that Batcow is not a house pet. Nonetheless, he's found Damian in his room reading a book to his cow several times.
- Dick and Jason have reenacted many YouTube videos on patrols, from quoting back and forth to one another, to performing dangerous parkour stunts.
- Damian once tried to strangle Jason after he won Unstable Unicorns by almost exclusively trolling Damian and preventing him from gaining a final unicorn five times in a row. In one game. Damian has still not forgiven him.
- Jason once offered Tim a hit of his cigarette. Dick later found out and flipped his shit.
- The kitchen is a hazardous place to be. The kids pretend to stab each other a lot.
- Jason communicates primarily through saying either "I'll kill you," or "I'd rather die." Although sometimes, when someone's talking (typically Steph or Dick), he'll randomly interject to say, "you're a [insert obscure twist of their words]."
- For example, Steph was once vacuuming the rug with a very old vacuum and said, "this vacuum would be terrible at cocaine." Jason replied from the couch, not looking up from his book, "you're a terrible cocaine vacuum."
- The siblings binged the Chernobyl HBO series in one night. Right off the bat, Damian went on a rant about how irresponsible the guy committing suicide was for not finding his cat a new home first and just leaving out food. He also had to leave the room during the dog part in later episodes. When Dick was sent to tell him it was over, he was found with his face buried in Titus and/or Ace's fur.
- On a lighter note, Jason commentated over many of the really heavy parts of that documentary, making it way funnier than it was supposed to be. Sometimes he genuinely argued with the TV.
- There is a quote book of obscure things they've said out of context. Here are some excerpts:
"Haha, losers, imagine having parents." - Jason
"And that's why child labor is good and justifiable." - Steph
"They really underestimate my stabbing abilities." - Damian
"This jacket is vegan leather. Which means I skinned a vegan and turned them into a jacket." - Cass
"That's how my brain works; it doesn't." - Tim
"But we're stressful together." - Dick
"As Thomas the Tank Engine once said: chuga chuga choo choo, I'm a sexy dinosaur." - Also Dick
"If you wouldn't have been killed by Nazis, are you even an interesting person?" - Duke
"Alright, shit pisser, let's rumble." - Jason
"Keep your rabid animal away from my crab legs." - Barbara
- Barbara has a tendency to play true crime podcasts while she works. People only ever seem to walk in during the weirdest parts. She doesn't feel the need to explain herself; she finds the looks on their faces hilarious.
- The household Alexa will respond to Dick unprompted, and it genuinely freaks him out. It doesn't do that for anyone else, and he thinks it's out to get him. This is why he has a Google at home in Blüdhaven instead.
- Jason isn't the most hygienic person, which concerns the family sometimes. Dick had learned that when he visits wherever Jason is living at the moment and "oops, forgets" his shampoo or body wash or whatever, Jason will end up using it. Jason has caught on, but will never openly admit that he's grateful for it.
- Dick will ruffle Damian's hair out of affection. Tim will do it to piss him off.
- Tim and Damian often kick each other without any other interaction. Bruce finds it troubling. Dick reminds him that he and Jason used to do the same thing (mainly Jason kicking Dick).
- When Tim and Steph play video games, it's not uncommon for Steph to hijack a car just to try to run Tim over while he tries to do side quests.
- Cass is the Super Smash Bros champion. And the Mario Kart champion. And tends to carry everyone when playing multi-player. Mostly because Steph tries to sabotage them at every corner, and only Cass is able to adapt.
I may do more of these, but I didn't want this to be TOO long.
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evvlevie · 2 years
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I SHIFTED FOR THE FIRST TIME !!!!  (as detailed as a shifting blogger can be but scroll down for the juicy part)
Hi, Hello, my beautiful beautiful readers! It's your favorite blogger Evie again and I don't know where to begin 😭 You've read the title so you know damn well what this post is about, and I am freaking over the moon to say it finally happened!
"So how did you shift?" Is most likely your very first question, and I promise I will answer it, but not without giving you full context on what led up to this magical event (or just scroll down in case only the shifting part concerns you)
so as I mentioned in my last post I had been in this state of not putting any effort into my shifting attempts anymore and basically treating shifting like any other of my manifestations: that it will happen on its own, if I simply want to.
⇣the post in question in case you're interested⇣
"Did it work?", you may be wondering. It did not. It might work for other people, because some points I made in that post still apply to me, but the idea of just counting on it to happen on its own didn't really work in my case. This being said, just because it didn't work for me, doesn't mean it can't work for you, and if you are an advanced manifestor who has complete trust in the law, this mindset might even be yours to apply.
Ever since I posted this, some days went by and my typical shifting-cycle repeated. I didn't shift after being so confident I would, and then the realization hit hard and I became severely demotivated. I even told my shifting bestie I was about to give up and lucky for me she motivated me and gave me back my faith. Speaking of faith: I had been noticing that certain angel numbers kept reoccurring in my life. The numbers being 1237 and 119. These numbers seem random, but 12:37 is the time my niece was born and 11th of September is my birthday. (yes I was born on 9/11, no not in the year that it happened, but two years later which is basically irrelevant information but it's a little fun fact about me.) I always thought the universe was showing me my birthday, up until I googled both of these numbers and realized they both mean something among the lines of "keep faith and trust in the universe". And lucky for you I did.
⇣small fangirl and shout-out-moment ⇣
Then on Monday I had a doctors appointment, and being bored in the waiting room I opened Tumblr. My feed was full of law of assumption content and I actually took the time and read through them all, and I reposted the ones I felt like gave me a lot of insight. Now to the freaking craziest part of all of this. (okay not true but it sure meant the world to me). I wake up in Tuesday and see that THE @astra-nomy reposted my post about the newest shifting tip I had found, and not only that, my comfort-shifter @multiversebaddie not only liked one of my posts, BUT FOLLOWED ME BACK. All in the same night and even right after another. CAN YOU IMAGINE WHAT THAT DID TO ME????? I was like no, nope you guys, I can't not shift if my favourite shifting and loa bloggers fucking found out I existed. (APHRODITE FOLLOWS ME I CANT COMPREHEND THAT). Plus @lavender--fairy commented on the post mentioned earlier, and her post that I reblogged, was the one who actually gave me the key to shifting. Hell yes. I mean I knew what I needed to know from other bloggers anyway, but her post actually brought me back to the correct mindset.
✧THE ACTUAL SHIFTING EXPERIENCE AKA THE REASON YOU ARE READING THIS IN THE FIRST PLACE✧
so now it is Wednesday. I never really talked about what DR I am shifting to, and I mentioned it somewhere on an old ass post but to put it as briefly as I can: my DR contains a certain group of YouTubers, and I am shifting so I can be friends with them. Now they post videos on Wednesdays and due to the time difference I get to watch them at 11:30 pm, so basically right before going to bed. I went and grabbed a quick shower and then I laid in bed and started doing what I was always doing: affirming. But due to me being me this quickly turned into overthinking and overcomplicating EVERYTHING which is why I stopped, went back on TikTok to clear my thoughts a little and then returned to my attempt.
✨ THE METHOD ✨
☞ I laid in a position most comfortable to me and I started imagining myself in my DR making myself ready for bed. In my head I reminded myself of the thing that I was able to remember due to @lavender--fairy 's post: The 4D is the real reality, and the 3D is only the translation of your inner thoughts. meaning: if I can visualize it, I am already IN it.
☞ Along with me imagining my DR-me doing what I did, I always reminded myself (affirming if you will) that if I can imagine it, I am in it. I purposely chose the Visualization of me doing things I was already doing in my CR day-to-day because you can feel the moment so much better and ground yourself in that reality way easier than imagining me climbing a mountain since I never did that.
☞ I was making myself aware over and over again, that the imagination is the real reality and that if I can imagine it, I am in it. For as long as I was trying to fall asleep. I even moved and rearranged my position constantly, imagining that I was my DR-me doing the same thing. I really just emerged myself in that visualization and started feeling what ever I did, because essentially that's how manifestation works. You don't need to worry about the 3D, and you don't have to feel like you're lacking something. You imagined it in the 4D, so you already did it silly!
☞ In combination to that I never forced myself to stay focused on my DR. Because as mentioned in this post below, you are supposed to let you mind do its own thing in a way, because you can't shift If you are too aware of what you are trying to do.
✨ THE MOMENT ✨
I found myself in this weird state between falling asleep and still being conscious enough to see and understand what you are envisioning. So I was technically awake while it happened. I didn't visualize my DR anymore, instead my mind went into a completely different direction and I saw myself buying milk with Harry Styles. No I did not even script him into my DR, this was just my brain doing brain things. Nonetheless I was still affirming that if I can see it, I am in it, and suddenly I felt myself getting pulled. I heard a little whooshing sound and I literally zoomed out of my body. I was standing in a dark corridor and I could see an open door in the distance with a little something happening in the room it was leading to but I was too far away to see what was happening. Suddenly the corridor started spinning and I felt myself getting pulled into a whole different door. I gained consciousness in this unknown room, but I couldn't tell where I was, or what I was seeing, because it was just dark in there and my eyes had no chance of adjusting quickly enough. I panicked and before I could even comprehend it, I knew I set the intention to shift back to my CR. I got pulled back into this mysterious corridor and shoved into another door by some weird energy and I opened my eyes back in the CR. I know it wasn't a dream because this whole zooming out, the mysterious energy sending me from door to door and the random dark room felt way too physical for it to be a dream. I could literally feel myself in this corridor as only a "being" of some sort, but definitely not as a human with a physical form. From the many success stories I have read regarding shifting realities, I have noticed that many shifters do not reach their desired reality on their first try. Almost every shifter that has talked about shifting mentioned that their first shift was weird and to a strange, undefined reality. (@multiversebaddie shifted to a random ass classroom for example)
✨ ADVICE TO TAKE AWAY FROM THIS EXPERIENCE ✨
I believe I shifted when I did, because my mind was in this gloomy state between conscious and unconscious, which ultimately made me believe myself on the spot when I told myself the affirmations I mentioned earlier. I did not doubt them and that's probably why the void state is such a powerful state to be in, because even if I wasn't, I imagine it to be very similar to this.
Another thing, that won't hurt you is educating yourself on the law of assumption. I know it helped me a lot and I believe that people who struggle with shifting, would benefit if they understood the way manifestation worked because ultimately manifestation and shifting is the same thing.
If you read everything from top to bottom: I love you. If you are doubting shifting, your ability to do it, or wether or not it is real: I can guarantee you as a first-person-witness: not only is it real, it's something every single dingus out there can achieve! And if I can help you in any way, shape, or form: don't be afraid to ask.
I send a lot of love and a lot of positive vibes to everyone reading this! I had been waiting to do this post ever since I created my blog and I still can't believe that I finally got to do it 😭
Yours in every reality
Evie <3
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zombie-bait · 4 months
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Omg i just realized I have something tiny to add to the whole James Somerton debacle. I'm currently watching the hbombguy vid (as you do when procrastinating assignments) and I remembered something that stood out to me in James' old videos.
So I used to be a fan of his stuff. I am also a fan of Hannibal and IWTV. He made a video covering both so naturally I was very hyped. It was called 'The Gay Appeal of Toxic Love.' The vid itself was fine (I don't remember having any super strong opinions of it besides being excited to hear ppl mention Interview cuz I had recently become obsessed) but one thing did stand out to me. In the IWTV section he mentions Nicki and, naturally, his death:
"After becoming a vampire, Nicky becomes nearly catatonic, and eventually slips away from Lestat entirely. And after centuries of dealing with depression and severe mental illness, Nicky kills himself."
(sourced from this transcript: https://github.com/TerraJRiley/James_Somerton_Transcripts/blob/main/Transcripts/The%20Gay%20Appeal%20of%20Toxic%20Love.txt)
To anyone who's read TVL, I don't think I need to explain that Nicki had not, in fact, been around for centuries. "Nicki had lived to be 30" has been rattling around in my head since I first read it.
And like, obviously I don't expect every youtube essayist to read several long-ish novels to have a full grasp of the series' deep lore, especially when the focus was largely on IWTV and Loustat rather than the entire Vampire Chronicles. Still, it makes you wonder a bit about the quality of the research being done here. You can find the proper info in like, 5 seconds by just going on the fan wiki so I'm not sure what his sources were. And that's the issue at hand, isn't it?
At the time I felt a tiny bit smug recognizing the error but in light of everything that's been revealed, it's kind of telling. I'm not saying this part was plagiarized (I haven't found anything but others on reddit have found issues with different sections of the same video) but rereading the transcript it comes off as someone who clearly doesn't know much about Interview.... It feels like he's reading through a loose summary of plot points rather than analyzing a piece of media that actually means anything to him. It's very much Interview for people who don't know Interview which, one could argue is fair. Especially beyond book one, VC is a niche series and a lot of elements that are important to certain characters or plot lines cannot be summarized quickly for an audience unfamiliar with it. A good writer, who's done a lot of research about the specific topic they have chosen to make a video on, would be able to balance this. There is a LOT to analyze about queerness in VC and its a shame to see one of the more popular queer media channels half-assing it just to churn out videos heavily made up of other people's work. In retrospect he had several videos like that, where he would discuss things like manga/manhua communities while clearly having little knowledge on the nuance of those subjects. He was an outsider who presented himself with a strange amount of authority.
This was content created with the sole intention of propping up queer stories and history, yet it's built off stolen work from queer authors and doesn't actually care that much about exploring the communities it features. Vids like the IWTV one weren't really fact checked because it's only people like me who would might give a shit or even notice anything is off in the first place. There's a bit of a similar vibe in some of his other vids where he undermines the experiences of queer women because he clearly has not taken the time to learn about the nuances of representing queer women in media. These are things that irritated me when I first started to notice them but I put those concerns in the back of my mind because I cared about the topics he was covering and was excited to see these discussions becoming more mainstream.
The revelations of this evening have been disappointing to say the least.
(also for the record I know he made other more recent vids about IWTV but I haven't seen those and even if his account was still up I don't think I would lol
BUT
I did look at the transcript for his 'Vampires and the Gays Who Love Them' video (found from the same link I included above) and this quote about the IWTV AMC show is sending me: "Daniel has never grappled with the complexities of being gay"
Shoutout to straight, uncomplicated icon Daniel Molloy. Devil's Minion was a mass hallucination, spread the word)
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Kasatkina isn't only a tennis player -- although she is really good at her day job -- and, even with some shoutouts to her sponsors, her account isn't just promotional content. Kasatkina, 26, is Russian and shares publicly that she is gay, in a time where few others from her country feel able to do so. While the Russian Supreme Court recently deemed the "international LGBT movement" an "extremist organization," Kasatkina and Zabiiako document their life together traveling the world on the WTA Tour, being unapologetically in love.
Their channel now has more than 41,000 subscribers, 134 videos, and several of their videos have gotten more than 100,000 views. Their US Open compilation episode received more than 200,000.
"We're getting a lot of feedback from Russia, from people who are struggling right now and who are in this terrible position and cannot do anything about it," Kasatkina, who has also spoken out against the Russian invasion of Ukraine, told ESPN this month. "And some of the people say that watching our vlog is the only inspirational thing they have right now. There was one who said, 'I just found your channel and I watched all the videos in two days and it helps me so much to live right now.' It's touching. It's really touching. And it's unexpected, really, because at the beginning we didn't think we would get this reaction."
[...]
But in 2019 she began to struggle with confidence, on and off the court. Her ranking plummeted to No. 70 that year, and she said she struggled internally with her sexuality, feeling unable to be fully herself. She didn't fare much better during the pandemic-affected 2020 season.
"A few years before coming out, I was in the moment where I wasn't sure, I wasn't confident in myself because I wasn't sure of anything I was doing," Kasatkina said. "Is it right or not? There were so many thoughts in my head, and I just couldn't fix it."
In the summer of 2021, Zabiiako sent Kasatkina a message after seeing some of her matches on television. She didn't know much about her -- "I just knew she was a tennis player and a cute girl, that's it actually" -- but the two quickly started exchanging texts. Three months later, they met in person when Kasatkina came to Moscow for the Kremlin Cup. They've been together ever since.
[...]
NEARLY TWO YEARS later [after the Kravchenko interview], Kasatkina doesn't recall everything she was feeling going into the interview, but she vividly remembers the anxiety she experienced.
"I was so stressed in that particular moment," Kasatkina said. "But I was also thinking, 'OK, nothing can get worse.' It's already on the edge. So I thought this is the moment to just make a splash about everything. In the same video I said many things which changed my life and, in the end, I don't regret it for a second."
Kasatkina was expecting a "lot of disagreement" to what she had said, and even "consequences" in Russia. And while it was all over Russian media and at least one politician called for her to be declared a "foreign agent," she was shocked by the amount of positive messages and comments she received. Some commended her bravery, others said they were inspired, and every dose of positivity emboldened her more.
"I just felt like a backpack full of stones fell off my shoulders," Kasatkina said. "I felt amazing actually."
[...]
As Zabiiako began to accompany Kasatkina around the world to the various events, she found herself fascinated by the globe-trotting lifestyle and was struck by how different it was from her own experiences as a professional athlete. Zabiiako, 29, had previously had her own YouTube channel, documenting her life as a figure skater, but thought they could do a joint channel.
"I didn't know much about tennis, I had seen a few matches, but really I didn't know anything," Zabiiako told ESPN. "I was shocked by how many tournaments there are. In figure skating we had a maximum of nine competitions per year, so this was an adjustment. But with the channel, we wanted to show people first of all about our life, but also what life on tour is like and that these women are not just athletes, not just players, but they're humans with their own feelings and problems."
[...]
"She does everything," Kasatkina said. "It's a Natasha production completely. Sometimes she's not sleeping during the night because she has a deadline for it [to post]. But it's all in her head, there is no set deadline, she's just that focused on it."
Both say the other one is more invested in the viewership numbers, but it's clear they both have been motivated by their growing audience -- and the messages they receive after each new video. Zabiiako tries to read every one.
"It's so important for LGBT people to see that there is life, there is freedom for them out there, because in some countries, they don't have that," Zabiiako said. "And they write in the DMs that they are so thankful for us. When I read [messages like] that, I have tears in my eyes because it means we're doing something huge for them. Even if it sometimes feels small to us, it can be huge for someone."
[...]
In a time when there are few openly gay players in professional tennis, and even fewer Russian players who have spoken out against the war, Kasatkina has become an icon for both. Sometimes the pressure can feel overwhelming, and she is keenly aware of the impact every interview, video or Instagram post can have.
Still, Kasatkina would do everything again, and she's grateful to have found her voice -- and to have people care what she has to say.
"It's a privileged position to stand with the microphone and whatever you say can affect at least one person and make a difference," Kasatkina said. "What I've learned in the past few years is that before you say something, you have to know that there are consequences and you have to know if you can handle it. And if you can, you can say what you want to say ...
"All we can do is to try to make this world better, and to be focused on yourself and try to be a better person every day. And to help people around you and these people then try to make the people around them happy. And then maybe with this change, we can improve this world. It's going to be tough, but I believe in this."
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inevesgf · 2 months
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will love you eternally if you do chrismd next 😭😭 barely any content for him nowadays and i’m CRAVING it
LORD OF THE RINGS ⠀,⠀ chrismd.
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synopsis ✩ in which after you filmed a football video for the chrismd channel, you added that you had never seen lord of the rings, which allows chris to have a reason to ask you on a date.
authors note: my first one - shot on here! i used to write quite often, but haven’t recently, so i hope this satisfies all you chris girlies out there. i sometimes get carried away when i write so this one is kind of a long one. honestly, i have also never seen lord of the rings so if there’s any inaccuracies, i apologize. nonetheless, i hope you all enjoy <3
word count: 2.8k.
being a youtuber around the london area, you had a lot of friends who presented themselves in the limelight of social media. other fellow youtubers, streamers even; you knew a variety of people. during your weekdays, you’d find yourself filming with friends, and on weekends, occasionally the same.
today was a weekday like any other. chris, one of your mutual friends, had asked you to film a football video with. while you weren’t the best at football, at least you were better than danny. danny would be there, so you were sure to embarrass him by hitting the crossbar more times than he could.
the filming of the video concluded within the span of two hours; enough time for the whole idea of it to go to bits and end up turning into a free for all. though you had fun, you couldn’t help by laugh at how off track this group got when they were together.
“alright,” freezy spoke, “now that that’s done, i can go home and finish my harry potter marathon with lux.” his seemingly enthralled tone made the others laugh around him as chris began to talk, “lord of the rings is way better, mate.” chris was an absolute nerd, but you couldn’t help but love it. he was quite different from the boys you hung around with, not bad different, but the kind of different that intrigued you. when conversations about cinema came up, you usually tried to involve yourself as you were passionate about your favorite films. “i’ve never seen lord of the rings.” chris’ mouth laid a-gap, like you had just shot him, as he put his hand over his heart dramatically. “well you better get on that. you’re reeeallly missing out.” a small laugh escaped your lips in return.
a few goodbyes were thrown out as everyone walked their separate ways. you had parked on one side of the pitch, where all but one of the guys had parked on the other. that one was chris. he had came jogging up behind you slowly as his breath hitched from the cool london air. “you seriously have never seen lord of the rings? the hobbit? not one?” once again, you chuckled. you could relate to chris in someways. you two were both very passionate about your interests, his just happened to be some movie about a ring. “nope, haven’t. i guess i never got around to it, really. i have no patience to watch films on my own.” you spoke. it was true, sometimes it would take you several days to watch one film on your own because you kept pausing. “then we’ll watch it together.” when chris proposed this idea, you couldn’t help but smile. in all honesty, you’ve always found him at least a bit attractive. of course, a guy inviting you to watch a film with him didn’t always mean a date, but still - it was exciting nonetheless. maybe he was just being friendly, but it never hurt to test the waters. “alright then, sounds like a plan.” and with that, chris began walking his way over to his vehicle, a smile on his face mirroring the one on yours. “see you then, y.n. have a good night.”
it hadn’t been long since you arrived at your flat after filming that you received a text from chris. you had honestly thought him proposing to watch lord of the rings with you was a joke, but it clearly wasn’t. ‘when are you free?’ the words on the screen illuminated your face, accentuating the deep pink tone that flushed your cheeks. you answered back, yet not quick enough to come off as desperate; you always overthought these types of things. ‘i’m free whenever :)’ you responded, as your schedule was clear of filming for the rest of the week. quickly after you had sent that text, he replied, ‘friday night, 7pm, and i’ll cook us dinner too ;)’ a blush crept onto your face. it had been wednesday night, so unfortunately you had to wait one anxious day before this. you couldn’t help but smile to yourself. like what had crossed your mind earlier, you had always thought chris was cute. there was an unspoken rule between you and becky that friends were off limits. you have both established that flings like that usually never work out, and overall it would be awkward if something bad happened. you did want to take a chance on it, after all, you didn’t know if this was a date or a friendly get together - even though you couldn’t help but pray to yourself that it’d be the first.
thursday passed faster than expected, and so did the first half of friday. you spent most of the day on thursday debriefing, cleaning, and overall just spending sometime to yourself. earlier friday, you had caught lunch with becky of who you told about your ‘date’ with chris. she didn’t think it was a horrible idea, in fact, she was happy for you. the girl seemed to be even more giddy than you. “y.n, this is great! you have to tell me everything, and i mean everything.” your friends had always been more interested in your own love life than you were. out of the group of girls you hung around, you were one of the only ones who was single. it didn’t bother you that much, i mean, you had more friends than you could ever ask for. its not that you didn’t find need for a relationship, you just liked your independence. “i will, trust me. you’ll be the first person i call when i get home.” a satisfied yet smitten look was placed upon your face as you began to discuss your excitement for tonight. you weren’t nervous, moreso giddy than anything.
after lunch, you made your way back to your flat. as you entered, a vibrating motion happened from your phone as the screen lit up. ‘are we still on for tonight?’ it was chris. again, after you waited a few moments to answer, you responded. ‘of course, see you then :)’ after you had eagerly waited for around for half past 5, you began to get ready. not knowing what the acceptable dress code would be for watching a film at someone’s flat, you picked out a simple yet comfortable outfit.
you pulled down your sweater over your head; a sidemen one harry had gifted you; as you flattened the creases on it with your hands. to play it safe, you paired it with light wash jeans and plain chucks. it didn’t take you long to get ready, though you checked yourself out in the mirror more than you liked to admit during the process. you had a bit of anxiety when it came to being presentable. the fear of being overdressed or undressed for an occasion was always at the back of your mind. since you had picked something casual, you assumed you’d be fine. the clock had reached half past 6, which gave you just enough time to make your way to chris’ flat. luckily he lived only minutes away from you, so being late wasn’t a stressor.
the drive to chris’ was filled with drowned out music by lizzy mcalpine playing as you thought anxiously. being around chris wasn’t something new to you, but being alone with him certainly was. you had known the boy for a few years now, yet you were never the closest. like you had earlier that week, you had filmed videos with him — having mutual friends — and commonly went out in a group together on weekends. you two had always gotten along and chatted together, but usually nothing more.
you pulled into the designated parking area outside of chris’ flat and put your car into park. before you got out of the car, you sighed anxiously as you checked your hair in the rearview mirror. as you made your way to the entrance of the building, a heavy breath escaped your lips. as you inhaled, the only smell you could make out was your vanilla perfume. you felt as if maybe your anxiousness was turning into a sort of anxiety. usually before dates, whether this was one or not, you were calm. not this time though. chris, without even have experienced most of his charm, had you smitten.
when you had reached chris’ apartment door, you checked your watch. the time read five to seven which meant you were perfectly on time. as you placed a knock on the door, you made an oath to yourself that you wouldn’t make it obvious you were nervous. seconds passed before chris opened the door, greeting you with a smile. “hi, y.n, im glad you could make it,” the smile still remained on his face as he held the door open for you to go inside, “welcome to my not-so-luxurious home.” his words earned a slight laugh from you as you walked in before he closed then door behind you. “how are you doing?” you started small talk. chris entered the kitchen area and you followed behind him. upon entering the kitchen, the delicious smell of steak hit your nose, practically making your mouth water. “just lovely. i think i pulled something during the last football video we did, but other than that, lovely.” one thing you liked about chris is that he acted the same around everyone, whether he was on camera or off. his charismatic, yet sarcastic personality carried on in person just as it did in his videos. “thank you for helping me out with that last video, by the way. did you enjoy your time?” as he spoke, he made his was around the kitchen island and turned the stoves burner off. you sat yourself down at one of the stools in front of the island, watching attentively as he finished cooking up the meal. “yes, i did,” you told, flashing him a smile, “its always a good time filming videos for your channel.” “i’m glad. even though that group gets so off course, we make for a good video. you were the highlight of this one; being better than most them. you’re a good player.” he smiled and you laughed, a blush crept up on your face as you were flattered by the boy. chris began cutting the steak up into portion sizes, placing the halves on plates next to some skillet cooked potatoes. “well, thank you. not as good as you though.” “okay, maybe not as good,” he chuckled at his own words, “but you got a good leg.” chris pulled up a stool across the table from you before placing one of the two plates he just prepared in front of you.
the delicious smell of steak hit your nose and you were pleased. excited to dig in, you grabbed your utensils as chris picked his up from the table. “freezy actually taught me when i moved to london,” you went on, “i haven’t played that much before then.” “makes it even funnier that you’re better than him.” again, you chuckled. you seemed to be full of laughs today, but it was surely just the nerves masking themselves. with some small talk in between, including conversations about football and youtube, you two began to eat your meal. to be honest, you were shocked. chris never striked you as a good cook — especially after you watched the come dine with me video — but this was surprisingly good. of course, he could have bought it at the store and grilled it on the stove, but it tasted wonderful nonetheless.
it took you both around 45 minutes to finish your meal due to being caught up in conversation. you had to admit, chris knew how to entertain. the stories he had to tell were interesting, and he always made sure to leave you time to react. afterwards, you two had made your way into chris’ living space. as he sat down on the sofa, he patted the spot next to him, telling you to sit down. as you sat down next to him on the sofa, you began to speak, “thank you for dinner. yknow, i never thought you be a good cook.” in return, chris laughed, slightly offended at your words. “wow, thank you, seemed like you had high hopes.” “i mean, hey, i just never thought you were the type that enjoyed cooking.” as you both laughed slightly, you two locked eyes. you had never realized before, but chris had the most gorgeous brown eyes. you felt as if you could get lost in them forever, but so you didn’t look like a creep, you quickly shifted your gaze over to the television. the intro of the film started to play as you attentively watched the screen. you didn’t know a smidge about lord of the rings, so you hoped chris would educate you along the way.
throughout watching the film, chris put in his commentary and answered any questions you had. you thought him being so passionate about a film was cute and you made sure to listen carefully to what he had to say on it. “i think im most like frodo,” chris added. you two had been halfway through the movie, so you sort of got an idea of where he was coming from. “why’s that?” you spoke as you turned your head from the television to face him. “well, i would say im brave, observant too,” chris seemed to be flattering himself with his own words, “maybe not as calm as him, but we’re similar in someways.” you nodded, once again locking eyes with the boy. you couldn’t help but notice that throughout the film, chris had moved his way closer to you. beforehand, you had left at least another persons worth of room between you both, but now as you locked eyes, your face was inches away. a sort of tension filled the air, making you more nervous than before. “i can see that. he reminds me of you,” chris smiled. before you could think, chris placed his hand on his cheek and planted a somewhat thirsty kiss on your lips.
you were shocked if anything. it took you milliseconds to respond before you reciprocated the action and pushed your lips against his. your thoughts raced a million miles a second, but you could help but celebrate mentally that this was — inn fact — a date. his lips danced against yours as you found yourself placing a hand on the back of his neck, tangling your fingers gently in his soft curls. the kiss — that was more so a quick make-out session — lasted a few, long minutes before he pulled away. chris laughed, seemingly embarrassed or flustered. your cheeks flushed pink as you giggled; giddy as if he were your grade 9 crush. your hair had fallen in-front of your eyes and with one quick motion chris found himself pushing the strand from your face to behind your ear. becky and you had always talked about boys, and if she was wrong about anything: it was about chivalry being dead. the cliches are what got you and this action had caused your pink cheeks to turn dark red. “you’re beautiful,” a whisper had fallen from his lips. his words had seemed to speak through you instead of to you; the message he had spoke engraving it’s way into your brain. you were flustered as thoughts, and not all appropriate ones at that, organized themselves in your mind. “thank you,” you matched his whispering tone, letting your hands fall from the back of his neck to his forearm, “you’re not too bad yourself.” you laughed softly. a hue of pink appeared on his cheeks, matching the one on yours. one thing you had in common with chris was your teasing, sarcastic manner, but if anything, what you had said was far from teasing. you usually didn’t develop feelings very fast, but you couldn’t be more sure that you had already fancied chris. one kiss had pulled you under, and far from return at that.
after your heart had stopped beating a hundred beats a minute and your cheeks returned to their natural hue, you fixed your gaze back onto the television. after his impulsive move, chris had seemed to relax himself. while still near to you, he put his arm around you, inching your body closer to his. this was a casual action, but it returned the butterflies you once had in your stomach. making yourself comfortable, you rested your head on his shoulder.
considering this first date successful, you couldn’t have been happier. you were still oddly surprised about the kiss, but hey! you weren’t complaining. shifting slowly in your position, you sunk your body closer to chris’, leaning into him. a satisfied hum escaped his lips as he slowly rubbed your forearm. your comfort overpowered you as the film started to come to an end, your eyes closing as you fell asleep in his arms.
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profitofthedune · 11 months
Text
Cabins and kisses
Tumblr media
Jake X female reader
word count 5,145
summary: Jake is your brothers high school best friend. Ten years later, is he still really?
warnings: um. All of them? MINORS DNI
It started as most evenings do when you leant time to your brother and his gang of heathen friends. That is to say, lazily. You had draped yourself over the recliner in his living room, legs hanging over one arm as your head hung over the opposite. 
“You guys are boring,” you’d sighed, watching the tv out of the corner of your eye. The YouTube app they had streaming a variety of music videos popped over to an ad about life insurance as you flipped yourself upright, your legs curling up under you. “What’s the move for tonight?” Your brother chuckled, stilling momentarily as the next video started. Whatever he said after his laughter faded, you couldn’t be sure. You were transfixed on the video on the screen, sure you recognized the band playing. “Is that?” You questioned with a point of your finger, one of your brothers friends confirming that the band playing was in fact the band of your brothers best friend from high school. Jake. Sir Jacob as he ordered you to call him when you were in 8th grade and he in 10th. You found it funny then that the nerdy kid your brother ran around with wanted to be called sir but now? You’d jump to call him whatever he pleased. 
“That dear sister, is what we are doing tonight. But if you find us so boring, you can stay here and sit the party out.” You shook your head fervently, grinning some. “Jakes in town for the week and we’re all driving up to the lake house in about an hour.”
After arguing over whether or not you were “old enough” to go to the party with his friends, at the grown age of 21, you found yourself sitting in the back of your brothers SUV. The drive to the lake house was just under two hours, shorter with the way your brother drove. You’d sat quiet in anticipation the entire ride, exhaling loudly when the vehicle came to a rolling stop outside of the familiar cabin. Several summers through your early teens had been spent there, running around with the Kiszka’s and swimming in the lake. It had been years since you’d been back, and the excitement began to bubble up into your chest as you climbed from the SUV and followed the group of people who had ridden with you into the house. 
Music was already playing, blaring from a speaker in the corner of the room as you crossed over the threshold, the door shutting behind you. Glancing around, you caught Jakes eyes from where he sat on the couch, deep in conversation with his twin and another man you didn’t know. Jake bit into his lower lip as you smiled shyly, breaking eye contact and glancing around the room as he went back to the conversation at hand. You broke away from your brother and his group of friends, hearing him greet Jake loudly as you wandered off to search out anyone you may know. 
~~~~~~~
Two hours later you had successfully mingled with people you hadn’t seen since high school, even conversing with Jakes brother Sam who was the same age as you. Now though, you were in search of the bathroom when you turned down a hall and someone ran smack into you. 
“Shit, I’m sorry,” the girl mumbled as you gasped at the cold wetness of the drink she had spilled down the front of you. Glancing down, your entire chest and torso covered in some type of red liquid, you frowned. Of course you’d choose today to wear a white T-shirt. Grumbling to yourself as you pinched the wet fabric and pulled it from clinging to your body, you sighed. It was barely nine o’clock, you were positive your brother wouldn’t be up for leaving, and you were too far out to order an Uber home. Spotting the restroom, you made a beeline for it just as Jake stepped out of the room across from it. He was laughing, his twin and a few others trailing out around him in a cloud of smoke. 
“Hey, Y/N!” He offered, stopping you before you could duck into the bathroom. “Oh shit,” he breathed out, noticing your nearly see through shirt. “You good?” Jake looked you over before meeting your eyes, nodding his head as the others he had been with slid passed the two of you and into the open living room. 
“No. Some chic spilt…” you pulled the fabric away from your skin again and sniffed at it. “Fuck I don’t know what this shit is but she spilt it on me. Have you seen my brother?”
Jake frowned, biting the corner of his lip as he shook his head. “Um actually he ran into town to pick up some more alcohol.” You sighed at that, knowing any town was a good hour away and that he’d likely be gone for a while. You were stuck in this cabin, wet and sticky and now miserable. Looking past you down the hall and then back to you, Jake nodded toward the door at the end of the long hallway. “I have some extra clothes and stuff with me…if you wanna borrow something?”
“Would you mind?” You followed him to the closed door, stepping inside once he’d pushed it open and then looking around after he’d shut the door behind the two of you. “God this place has barely changed.” 
Jake laughed, crossing over to the bed where a duffel bag laid. “Watch it,” he chuckled. “This is my home away from home and I like it just how it is.” He turned to you, holding up an old baseball tee in one hand and a thin black T-shirt in the other. Taking the baseball tee from him, you held it out in front of you. Frankenmuth ‘78 was screen printed on the front. The shirt itself had, without a doubt, seen better days. There were small holes at the neck and along the hem of the sleeves. Spots of the fabric thinner than others. You recognized the shirt though, one Jake had worn plenty of nights a dozen summers ago when both of your families had vacationed on the lake. The idea of him still carrying around a T-shirt this old made you giggle. It was ludicrous in some ways, a man with obvious money hanging on to worn faded shirts. 
“What, they don’t pay you enough to buy new clothes Mr. Rockstar?” You teased, pulling your soiled shirt over your head and dropping it to the floor. Modesty had been lost on you, growing up with a brother and several male cousins, but it would’ve been good of you to remember that you’d forgone wearing a bra that day. You hadn’t even bothered to turn away from Jake and, as you pulled his shirt over your head and then down over your bare breasts, you caught sight of the way he was gawking at you. Jake shifted his weight, mouth hanging slightly open as he blinked rapidly, unable to take his eyes off of you. 
“See something you like?” You questioned, pulling your hair out from under the neck of the shirt. 
Jake exhaled slowly, taking a step in your direction as he pushed his hair back behind his ears. “Actually, yeah.” He confirmed, licking over his lips with a pointed tongue. 
Closing the distance between the two of you, Jake slid his hands around your waist, pulling you against his chest as he looked down at you. “You look different than the last time I saw you.” He breathed out, moving his mouth against your ear as his hands moved down to your ass. Grabbing and kneading at your ass cheeks, he placed a wet kiss to the shell of your ear before pulling your lobe in between his plump lips. You could feel the tip of his tongue run over your earlobe as he sucked gently, causing you to shiver. Without giving much thought to your actions, you reached your hands up and tangled your fingers into his long hair, whimpering quietly when he released your ear from between his lips.
 “Don’t worry sweetheart,” he breathed out, moving so his lips were pressing kisses to the corner of your mouth. “Just moving my mouth to a better place.” He spoke against your mouth, voice low and husky as he parted your lips with his tongue. He tasted of bourbon and weed, no doubt he had been celebrating his homecoming for the last few hours. You returned Jacobs kisses, your tongue fighting with his for control over this forbidden dance you two were now entwined in. 
“Jake,” you breathed out, breaking the kiss between the two of you and swallowing gasps of air in an effort to catch your breath. His kiss had made you dizzy, your head spinning with thoughts of the man before you. Opening your mouth to speak again, Jake pushed a single digit against your lips and shook his head. 
“C’mere,” he demanded, grabbing your hand and walking you to the king size bed that sat against the middle of the far wall. The side of the bed was against two large windows and, peering out into the blackened sky, you could tell it had begun to rain. Droplets danced upon the water of the lake that the house overlooked, causing ripples to form and grow with each one. Still yet, they danced upon the window glass also, creating a low thrum of natures music to set the mood. Jake dropped to the edge of the bed, peering up at you through his lashes before pulling you to him. Straddling his lap, you leaned in and pressed a gentle kiss to his plush, satin lips. “I like seeing you in my shirt,” he hummed, sliding his hands underneath the fabric and teasing them up your sides as you continued to press light kisses to his mouth. Your breath hitched in your throat as Jake rolled his thumb over one of your nipples, drawing a slow circle over the pebbled skin.  “Breath baby,” he reminded you between kisses. He continued to run circles over and around your hardened nipple, pushing the shirt you had on up a little further every few seconds before he pulled away from kissing you. His brown eyes darkened as, while staring up at you, he pulled the shirt up over your shoulders and head. Dropping it to the floor, his gaze left your face as he focused on your bare tits. Leaning in, Jake took one nipple into his mouth while bringing his hand back up to pay attention to the next. You could hear him moan around you, his eyes falling closed as he continued to swirl his tongue around your hardened nipple, grazing his teeth over it and sucking lightly. At the same time, his thumb and forefinger rolled your other nipple through them before pinching just enough to illicit a hiss out of you. Sucking in air, you whimpered as he continued his assault on your sensitive breasts. You could feel yourself growing more turned on, grinding down against Jakes lap. 
Reaching for the hem of his T-shirt, you pulled it up and over his head, pushing him away from your chest in the process. “Now we’re even,” you grinned, leaning in to catch his lips with yours just as the bedroom door pushed open. A blast of music came through as Jakes twin, Josh, entered the room. He stilled momentarily, eyes wide and cheeks reddening. 
“So sorry.” He blurted, turning on his heel and crossing back over the threshold, pulling the door shut as he went. 
Exchanging a look with you, Jake moved you from his lap to sit on the bed next to him. “Hold on,” he mumbled, crossing the room and turning the lock on the doorknob. Turning back to you, your eyes fell to his waist and then lower, lingering on his obvious hard on. 
“See something you like?” Jake countered, using your line against you as he came to stand in front of where you sat on the bed. 
“Actually,” you started, letting out a giggle as Jacob dove at you on top of the bed. You fell back into a laying position, arms wrapping around Jakes neck as your lips crashed against his. It wasn’t long before he was pushing his tongue through your parted lips, meeting yours over and over as one of his hands cupped at your breast. Jake trailed several wet, open mouthed kisses from your mouth down over your jaw and down your neck. He bit and sucked at the sensitive skin at the crook of your neck, his tongue gliding over each spot to soothe the sting his bite left behind. The more you moaned with each bite, suck and kiss, the more aggressive Jakes mouth got against your skin. Squeezing your eyes shut, your breathing picked up, becoming labored as Jake moved on from your neck, down the middle of your chest, and stopped just above your belly button. Placing several sweet kisses there, he sat up on his knees and began to undo your pants. First the button, and then the zipper, before pulling them down over your hips. You lifted your ass from the bed, allowing his movements to be easier as he pushed your jeans down over your legs until you could kick them off. 
You watched as Jake stared at you for a beat, licking over his lips like he was a starved man eyeing the last piece of pie in a restaurant. Catching you watching him, the brunette wiggled his eyebrows before dipping down and mouthing over your center. You let out a shaky breath as he repeated his action, his middle and pointer fingers coming up and pushing the fabric to the side as he leant in a third time to place a kiss to your waiting cunt. As Jakes lips connected to your skin there, his tongue snaked out and through your folds, dancing around your clit before he hummed his approval and sat back up. 
“Fuck am I going to enjoy this,” he breathed, pulling the hair tie from around his middle finger and making quick work of fixing his hair into a low bun of sorts. A few loose strands fell in his face and he shook them out of his eyes before reaching down and dragging a finger over your slit. The cotton of your underwear was visibly damp thanks to how wet he’d made you already. “Tell me. Do you enjoy having your cunt ate? Want my face buried in that pretty pussy of yours until you cum on my tongue?” 
You’d be lying if you said you’d ever thought of Jake as more than your older brothers friend. Sure, all of your friends through high school had developed crushes on him or his twin, or both. But he had never really been your type. You hadn’t given him a second thought since years prior when you’d seen him last, until that music video had come on at your brothers earlier in the evening. The Jake in front of you wasn’t the kid you knew ten years earlier. No, this man had hair past his shoulders, letting it hang naturally in loose waves about his back. His arms were muscular and his stomach soft, but lean. His skin tanned and his eyes just as kind as you’d remembered. His voice was deeper than you recalled though, his lips more plump and his hands calloused in ways only a musician of his caliber would know. Jake teased the waistband of your underwear down a little, pulling you from your reverie as he managed to remove them completely before you’d realized you had yet to answer him. With a nod, you watched as he folded your underwear haphazardly and shoved them into his pocket. 
“Need to hear your words sweetheart. I can’t use my mouth if you don’t use yours.” He was grinning now, the tip of his tongue poking out from between his lips as he waited for you to respond. 
“Yes. Fuck, yes Jake. Please I want to feel your mouth on me.” 
Jacob didn’t wait for you to say more than that, his calloused hands skating their way up your legs and pushing your thighs apart. Jake dipped his head down and licked through your folds, his tongue flat and wide as he did. Repeating this, he made sure to linger around your clit, sucking gently at it before pushing his weight up on his hands and staring up at you. “Ride my face,” he demanded, his pupils blown out, causing his eyes to appear much darker than they were. With that, he moved to lay at the head of the bed, grabbing your hand and pulling you to him as you got up on your knees. “C’mon sweet girl, don’t keep me waiting.” 
You crawled up the bed to meet him and straddled his shoulders, peering down at him as he snaked his arms around your thighs. Jake pulled you up closer, a grin dancing on his lips as you moved your knees to either side of his head. Hovering there, you hesitated, never having done this before. Jake could sense your hesitation and, instead of telling you what to do again, he leant up and connected his mouth to your waiting cunt. The contact made you yelp in surprise, moaning out as he pulled you down onto his face. Jakes tongue made quick work of lapping and licking at your entrance, the bridge of his nose connecting with your pulsing clit each time he moved his face this way or that. Reaching out, you grabbed onto the headboard to steady yourself as you begin to roll your hips down, fucking yourself on Jakes tongue. You could hear him slurping and licking, moaning at the taste and feel of you as the grip he had around your thighs tightened. Jake used his hands to guide you over his face as well, making sure his nose hit all of the sensitive spots his tongue couldn’t as his mouth paid special attention to your entrance. His tongue flicked and danced around you in the most delicious ways until you felt your legs begin to shake, a familiar heat building low in your belly before raging through you. Panting, you dropped your head back and moaned his name loudly as you came, soaking his mouth and chin as he drank you up. Not one to leave a job only half done, Jacob continued to lick and suck at your pussy as his hands held you still over him. When he felt satisfied with the work he’d done, Jacob loosened his grip on you and tapped your thigh gently. 
Moving off of him, you collapsed to the bed beside where he lay, running your hands over his chest as he looked over at you. The two of you shared a look, him smiling slyly as he turned to his side and leaned in to kiss you slowly. As your lips met, his index finger came up to twirl a lock of your hair around it before he gave it a gentle tug. “Jacob,” you breathed against his lips, the corners of your mouth raising into a grin as he shifted his weight so he was hovering over you then. 
“Didn’t I tell you to call me Sir Jacob,” he teased, placing light kisses all about your cheeks and jaw. You went to speak but were cut off by Jake capturing your lips with his in a passionate kiss, grinding his hips into yours. You could feel his erection against your thigh, the denim of his jeans strained and tight over him. You let Jake control the kiss, his tongue leading you on a journey through stages of fireworks and electricity, static buzzing and vibrating about you as you absently undid his belt and then his jeans. You were seeing stars practically by the time he broke the kiss to kick his jeans off, you having managed to get them down below his hips before he did so. Left in only his boxers, Jake crawled up your body until he was straddling your neck, both of your arms pinned between and behind him as he palmed at his cock over the fabric of his boxer briefs. You could see a little spot where he had leaked in his excitement, which made you blush but smirk at the same time. It had been obvious the effect he was having on you, but it was nice to know you’d been having an effect on him as well. 
Watching you eye him, Jake pushed the elastic waistband of his boxers down, freeing his dick as it sprung up, hard and thick. “See something you like now?” He questioned you as he fisted himself, moving the head of his dick over the outline of your lips. You looked at him for a beat, eyelids hooded and heavy with lust before nodding. “Good,” Jake confirmed, tapping your cheek with his free hand. Taking the hint, you dropped your mouth open, doing your best to relax your throat as Jake fed himself into your warm and wet mouth. He slid the length of his dick along your tongue, backing out and then pushing back in as he kept a hand resting against your cheek. His thumb was caressing over the skin at the corner of your mouth, eyes transfixed on where his cock and your mouth connected over and over. Your lips were kiss swollen already, but plumping more by the second as he thrust into your mouth. Jake moved his way up to where he was right over you, leaning forward so he could fuck into your mouth better without having to hold his dick in one hand. He rested his forearms on the bed above your head. Grabbing his hips, you pulled him down onto you further, causing his dick to tap the back of your throat as he rolled his hips. You moaned around him as he continued to pump into your mouth at a grueling pace. Doing your best to remember to breath through your nose, you could faintly hear Jake whimpering and moaning above you as his hips moved quicker, his body trembly the closer he came to his release. 
“Fuck baby, yeah baby. Fuck you’re so good. Letting me fuck your mouth like this. Mmm be a, be a good girl and swallow it all for me. Be my good girl mmm,” Jakes words came out broken and low as he met his end, spilling his hot release down your throat as you hollowed your cheeks and took the beating he was delivering with each thrust to the back of your throat. When he finally backed out of your mouth, cheeks flushed and cock hanging half hard against his boxers where they were pushed down over his thighs, you whimpered at the loss of the feeling of him in your mouth. The sound didn’t go unnoticed as Jake grinned down at you, kicking his boxers entirely off before slotting his legs with yours as he leaned in for a quick kiss. 
“My good girl,” he purred, licking over your lips as you let out a shaky breath. “I’m going to fuck you now,” he exhaled as you felt his hand wrap around the back of your thigh and pull your leg up over his hip. “I want you to tell me what you like. What you want.” 
“Okay,” you agreed hurriedly, feeling him grind against you. His cock was already hard again, a testament either to his stamina or how long it had been for him, you figured. You, well you were clenching around nothing already. Your arousal dripping out and down you each time you moved. You’d never been as turned on as you were tonight with Jake and he seemed to know that without you having to say it. Jake ran the tip of his cock through your folds and teased at your entrance, watching your face as he did. “God you’re so wet for me. Does it turn you on to hear me call you my good girl?”
You gave Jake a nod, moaning softly in his ear. “Yes,” you breathed out, gasping as he pushed into you completely. The sting of pleasure pulsed around you as you felt Jakes cock stretch and fill you up like you’d never felt before. He held himself there for a moment so you could adjust to the feeling of him before pulling out of you fully. Thrusting back into your waiting cunt, desperate to be stretched around him again, he bit your jaw before kissing the same spot. Jake did this several times, each time breaking the connection between your bodies fully, pushing back in aggressively and biting a new spot before kissing or sucking at it. Each time, you cried out his name, your fingernails digging into his back as he drug you through a fiery inferno of pleasure, nudging you towards the edge of sweet release with each motion. Finally, when Jacob could tell that you were dangling on the edge of your orgasm, your legs quaking against his body and your arousal soaking him with each thrust into your pussy, he moved a hand between the two of you, circling his thumb around your clit in slow, tight movements. 
“That’s my girl,” he coaxed, thumb still circling your sensitive bundle of nerves as his cock pumped into you. “Give it to me baby, I can tell you’re right there.” He spoke with his mouth against your throat, sucking a small love mark into the skin there as he felt you finally release, clenching around him and crying out his name like a mantra. 
“Jake. Jake. Jake.” 
He fucking loved every second of your undoing, giving up his teasing of your clit as he brought both hands up to bury and tangle in your hair. Jake locked you in from moving this way, one arm on each side of your head as he raised his head enough to make eye contact with you. “Gimme anything I want?” He questioned, being met with your silent answer as you nodded. “Good,” he breathed, kissing you roughly. Your lips crashed into one another, mouths parting for tongues to dance together, teeth clashing as Jake continued to fuck into you for several minutes before abruptly stopping and pulling out. 
His sudden movement, or lack there of, caught you off guard. “On your knees, ass up.” He demanded, moving away from you to give you room. When you moved a little too slow for his liking, rolling into your stomach before pushing up onto your knees, Jake cracked a stinging slap to the right side of your ass. “Cmon I thought you were my good girl,” he bit out. The smirk on his face let you know it was a facade, this bossy demanding sex god before you. He was pleased with the way you obeyed him, which pleased you as well. 
“I am, Jake…sir,” you added for good measure, positioning yourself so your chest was to the mattress and your ass as high up in the air as you could get it. You rubbed your thighs together, lending a little friction to your aching and empty cunt as he sat back and admired this new position momentarily. When at last you felt him grab onto your hips again, Jake gave you no time to ready yourself before burying himself to the hilt within your tight, wet pussy. In this position he was able to fuck into you deeper, pulling you back to him with every roll forward of his hips. The sound of skin slapping against skin at a furious pace drowned out your moans and mewls, your begging of him to fuck you harder, faster, forever and his vow to fulfill all of those things. All you could do was grab at the sheets on the bed, your body shaking violently as you climbed toward another orgasm as Jakes cock repeatedly hit that sweet spot deep within you that so few had found before. Jacob helped you climb to the top of that proverbial ladder over and over, each time letting you reach nearly the top before backing off. Each time you sliding your way back into the agonizing pit of darkness that he drug you through with each deep thrust of his thick cock. Each time pulling you up the other side of that darkness to a beautiful place of bright light and electric energy until you felt like you couldn’t take it anymore. You were overstimulated, fucked out, too sensitive, and begging for sweet release. “Please, please, Jake. Jake. Jake please!” You cried out until finally, finally as Jake moved one leg up to rest not on his knee but his foot you felt him at a new angle. This one caused your head to drop forward, white heat racing through your body as that tight coil of desire snapped and sprung loose within you. Jacob felt you clench down around him, your walls fluttering and pulsing as your arousal soaked him. The noises your bodies made as they met and pulled apart became wet, sloppy almost as Jake gave into his own release, his body leaning over yours as his mouth fell near your ear. 
“Oh baby, that’s it. Take it, fuck. You take my dick so good,” he moaned, releasing into your spent cunt as his thrusts slowed, faltered, stilled and finally stopped. The two of you collapsed to the bed, you on your stomach and Jake laying over your back, his now softening dick still inside you. 
“Yo, where’s Jake?” A familiar voice rang out from outside the bedroom door, one you recognized all too well as your brothers. Fuck. 
“Shit.” Jake breathed, pulling out and away from you and sitting up on the bed. You followed suit, biting into your lower lip and staring at your hands. You were expecting him to tell you this was a mistake. Or it can’t happen again. After all he was one of your brothers best friends from high school. Jake took you by surprise though, noticing the sudden worry on your face. “Hey. Hey,” he coaxed you to look up at him, placing a finger under your chin. “I’m gonna tell him you got a ride home with someone and that I’m not feeling great. Stay with me?” Your face relaxed in relief as you have a quick nod. 
“Good. We can worry about what comes next tomorrow.” Jake placed a gentle kiss upon your lips then before sliding off the bed and grabbing his jeans. “Wait here, I’ll be back.” 
377 notes · View notes
ellestra · 4 months
Text
Farming content James Somerton style
Edited: I cleaned up sentences, removed typos and added some links
You've probably seen the latest hbomberguy video that highlights plagiarism problem on youtube. He gives several examples many I never heard about but I've been recommended iilluminaughtii before and watched some of her stuff before getting tired of seemingly endless volume (now I know why). But then he gets to the real subject of the video and I did watch a lot of James Somerton videos. And I liked many of them. I liked them a lot.
I didn't give him any money and, as much as it came as relief, I kept thinking how this must feel so much worse for people who did. I thought about supporting him for a moment when he posted (in April this year!) how his videos are getting less views because youtube algorithm and demonetisation of gay creators (it's a real thing so it was easy to believe) and he will be forced to stop creating if people don't sign up to his patreon. But I was casual viewer and he seemed big enough so I didn't. It must feel like such a betrayal to those who created a real community around him. Just like his film production company it's clear now it was another of his scams. It's infuriating how well it worked.
Somerton deleted his patreon now (along with his twitter and discord server) so there is probably no recourse for those affected. The only good thing is that someone big enough highlighted what he did (and brought receipts) so he had to stop. When smaller creators called him out it either went unnoticed or he managed to make himself a victim (and send his fans after them). He actually did what Anita Sarkeesian was accused of and gaslighted his followers about it. His misogyny just adds an extra bitter taste to this.
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At the end hbomberguy talks about how if Somerton was open about what he was doing this could've been his niche. He said it just as I was thinking basically the same thing. I'm sure there is a market for field review type of videos. Not review like movie or book review but in academic sense when you take other people articles on the subject and compare to show the state of research on the subject on at the moment.
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This kind of reviews doesn't need any original research. The value is in giving people overview of where the field is at and pointing them to the actual research so they can read more in depth about the results. If you already did the search for all the sources this is a perfect format to use them. Most people don't have time or resources to comb through all the resources themselves but they like to learn about it and this is why videos like that are popular. That's why iilluminaughtii, Somerton and al. were able to cash in on it.
But of course this kind of things have to properly cited. And they cannot be just all quotes. You have to make coherent points not just make stuff up for the transitions (lies that actually made Todd in the Shadows make a video not about music). I suppose that's too much work. Too much effort when you need to crank out content to satisfy all the sponsors.
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I was glad to find out I already watch most of the queer creators recommended in the hbomberguy's video (and put on this watch list) as an alternative (I would add Caelan Conrad to it - funnily enough I found them through their video about antivax movement). I trained my youtube recommendations well in which way it skews but it's easier to kick out all the obviously awful when you know what talking points to avoid. It's much harder to spot grift when it pretends to care about the same things you care about. Somerton was saying all the right things. It just wasn't his words.
Did he even believe any of it? I bet he'll insist on yes but the laziness says otherwise. It seems like it was all just for the money and fans this angle gave him. That he enjoyed being cool to the audience he built and the stuff it bought him. Be gay do crime for real. Only he didn't write that one either.
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tobyfoxfacts · 4 months
Text
How to compose like Toby Fox
I analyzed Toby's music... here's the backbones to his songs, and various Toby techniques! I included ways to get started with recording your music! Read more to see 👀
Battle themes
For the music Toby uses in his battle themes, he starts with a 1-2 measure long riff. He gradually adds in more instruments, looping the original track from the intro. A simple tune you can hum to. After adding in several instruments, he adds the bridge of the song. He removes the beginning melody and lets the background music continue for a measure. Then he slows down the song and keeps one instrument. After that he adds a buildup and changes the octave, or adds harmony to the final chorus. At the very end, he adds a finale that ties the beginning to the end of the song.
Background music
For the background music during exploring, he makes the songs easily "loopable" so the beginning fades into the end. He uses orchestra sound fonts and ambient noise. During emotional short cut scenes he uses faint opera vocals as well. Don't forget the random wind whooshing sounds.
Instruments used
Undertale mostly focused on chiptune synthesizers and 8 bit sounds. Toby branched out to orchestra instruments in chapter 1 of Deltarune, and emphasized his piano skills. In chapter 2, he fell in love with the harpsichord that he'd romanced many years ago in his homestuck side gig. Thank goodness he left the weird overused synth pitch bending in his past. Good grief, that was... creative. Toby's been experimenting with brass instruments, which makes sense. Toby played trumpet in jazz band during high school. After his work on Pokémon, Toby's music has become diverse, and each song has a unique twist. Working with other artists was definitely a great step for him! Don't be afraid to reach out to other beginner musicians and collaborate!
Making music like Toby
To make music like Toby... experiment! Create a long-term relationship with the harpsichord and mash notes together until you find yourself playing them over and over, nodding your head in satisfaction. You gotta quickly record the track and tweak it later so you remember what it sounds like.
Simple ways to record music
Music professionals will K1LL me for this one. Here's some ways to begin recording music without buying that 1999$ springo bingo synth board with the doodoofart pro vst producing sound bit 2000.
Using these tips, you can record and change sound fonts! Once you record your track, you can mess around with the sound on your recording device! That's how Toby has so many instruments 👀
Look up videos on YouTube about converting music into wav and mp3 files. Toby didn't know what a wav file was when he began music production! Don't be scared of all these fancy weird words. You'll catch on! There's no shame in going on the web for help. Music production can get very complicated with random errors and shit. (I have cried over my piano before) That's what reddit is for! Frustration is inevitable. Just take a deep breath and STAY DETERMINED. Even if you can't play piano? Watch tutorials and practice! Toby is self taught and doesn't write sheet music!
If you have an electric piano keyboard, you can hook it up to a computer with a cable that's easily found on Amazon. You can also use an iPad pro, hook THAT up and record it in a program like garage band. I recommend investing in studio one 5 on your computer! If you've got studio one... get a vocaloid software bundle and mess around with piapro studio 👀 add vocals!!! There's some cheap vocaloids out there! Toby's worked with some vocaloid producers in the past! Mess around and have fun!
Get creative!
The keyboard is your playground. Toby says that simplicity is important. He mentioned this in the annotations included on the sheet music that came with the undertale collectors edition. You don't need to go overboard with advanced shit to sound professional. Some of the best songs are simple and catchy!
Toby would want you to be kind to yourself and your hands. Be patient. Music takes time! Make your own songs and follow your own path. Create your own style so when people hear your music they know it's you!
Good luck!
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mazeinthemiroh · 1 year
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hiiii id like to request a reaction for ateez members pls. can it be about the reader dating a member but her bias was someone else in the group, idk it seems like such a fun concept if u could please. it could be fluff/ angst whatever u want
and can the hongjoong one be a mingi bias whereas the mingi one is a hongjoong bias (my bias and bias wrecker is showing severely hehe)
everything else can be whatever u want :))
ateez when their s/o's bias is another member
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genre: fluff, crack, slight angst?
word count: 1.2k
warnings: cursing, they vary in length tbh so sorry about that
author's notes: oh boy have i been waiting for this request! this is such a fun concept and i really enjoyed writing this so thank you for requesting!! hope you're doing well and hope this is to your liking! let me know what you thought love <33
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hongjoong
"and that one rapper? he's so hot! i think he's actually my favourite."
hongjoong was watching one of your old youtube videos; a reaction video to ateez. this is when you first heard about them and wanted to get into their music years ago. who would've thought that life would end up here? you dating one of the members of ateez.
hongjoong giggled at your statement, "awww you loved me from the very beginning" he teased as you read your book on the other side of the room, half embarrassed and half entertained that he was watching that video.
"actually i was talking about mingi," you said cheekily, not even bothering to look up from your book.
all you were met with was silence. too much silence that consequently caused you, after long last, to raise your head and investigate.
and what you saw was a half glare and a big pout on hongjoong's face.
"aww baby don't be sad," you giggled as you went over to him and wrapped your arms around him, "your my favourite now!" you started placing your lips on his neck, trailing then softly in just the right spots, softening him up again.
"and you always will be~
seonghwa
"so." seonghwa's voice sounded from next to you. you were both cuddled up on the couch together, watching an uninteresting sitcom to pass the time. there was something quite dangerous about the smoothness of seonghwa's voice, but you couldn't quite place what.
"when were you gonna tell me yunho was your bias?"
your heart dropped. you quickly glanced at his face to see a unimpressed expression looking back at you.
"h-how did you even-"
"lockscreen."
oh shit. you were fairly new into your relationship with seonghwa, so forgetting to change your lockscreen to something that didn't scream 'i love jeong yunho so much #slay' would've been wise.
"you idiot," seonghwa teased and chuckled lowly, looking back to the tv screen, shaking his head. you pouted and nudged him in response.
"hey! call me an idiot and i'll keep the lockscreen as it is!"
yunho
"well this is awkward."
san said with a massive beaming smile in his face as he continued to go about his day, washes the dishes innocently as if he wasn't the main cause of an argument.
yunho tutted and looked back at you disapprovingly whilst you stuttered and trained to explain yourself.
"she's an admirer, what can i say?" san mused loudly to himself, making yunho gnash his teeth in frustration.
"shut it, you," he hissed at his roommate who merely chuckled in reply. he had never seen yunho jealous before and, to be honest, he found it highly amusing. mostly because yunho looked like a hurt puppy who had lost its way home.
"this doesn't mean anything," you say to your sulky boyfriend, slide your hands of his shoulders, "i love you the most. on the world."
"that's debatable-"
"san!"
"okay, okay..."
yeosang
"jongho is just really cool, okay?"
you sat opposite your boyfriend in a cafe as he took a long slurp of his coffee, not once breaking eye contact with you. he had been interrogating you about this topic for quite some time now, ever since he found out you had a soft spot for jongho.
"cooler than me?" he clicked his tongue on the roof of his mouth and twisted the coffee cup in his hands, looking at you with immense interest.
"i never said that," you retorted, "you're just... different!"
"different how?" yeosang pressed on, not giving you a very easy time as he humorously continued to question you.
"well... i just love his voice," you said in a dreamy voice, "like every time i hear him singing i feel i'm ascending into the heavens!"
"well you'd say the same with me if i got more lines!" yeosang threw a used napkin at you and chuckled at his own joke.
san
"what do you mean i'm not your bias?"
your disheartened boyfriend had the biggest, plumpest pout on those lips of his as he looked at your with shiny puppy eyes. this was all news to him and honestly he felt like his whole world fell apart. "i'm dating you am i not??"
"yeah but-" you tailed off innocently, but there was nothing you could say to calm this man's humorously dramatic expression.
"who's your bias then?" he demanded, feigning anger with the twinge of sarcasm in his voice. you knew better to keep your mouth shut.
"if its wooyoung i swear to god, y/n-"
"it's not!"
"..."
"..."
"... you liar!"
he playfully grabbed a pillow and started hitting you with it as you giggled mischievously. you couldn't help but laugh at his childishness. it was no big deal, right?
mingi
you, mingi and hongjoong sat in the living room together in silence. for hongjoong, he just went about his business, laptop on his lap as he typed away doing some sort of work. but you and mingi were avoiding eye contact, avoiding talking. avoiding literally everything except breathing.
it was only a matter of time before hongjoong caught onto this. and as he looked from you, to mingi, and then back to you again, he knew there was soemthing wrong.
"what's up with you guys?" he asked suspiciously, lowering his laptop screen slightly.
"nothing, nothin-"
"y/n loves you more than me."
"wha- mingi!" you lightly slapped his arm defensively, "mingi is mad that you're my bias. that's all. nothing deep." your voice was high and strained as mingi crossed his arms Iver his chest.
"wait," hongjoong started grinning proudly, "... i'm your bias?"
by this time mingi was fuming and glaring daggers into hongjoong, striking fear into the leader.
"ehem that's not important," hongjoong coughed nervously, "that doesn't mean anything!"
"exactly!" you chimed in, "see mingi?"
you nudged him gently now, but the gaze he gave you in return did not look so convincing.
wooyoung
"i get it, he's more handsome than me."
this made you laugh. not because it was true or you were making fun of your boyfriend, but more with how you couldn't tell if he was being serious or not.
but after the minutes went by and the unusual coldness and silence from wooyoung continued, you realised that he was actually upset about this.
"oh woo, don't be like that," you leaned over to grab his hand, "you're not being serious are you?"
"well you like my best friend more than me. why wouldn't i be upset about this?" he lucked his dry lips and cleared his throat, his eyebrows furrowed.
"because you're my number one," you leaned over to give him a kiss on the cheek. and then another. and then another. so many sloppy kisses had been peppered all over his face by the time he started giggling and smiling again. you had won him over!
jongho
"seonghwa looks like such an angel," you stared with sparkly eyes at the screen in front of you as you watched the new ateez music video for their latest comeback.
jongho couldn't help but notice that your attention was mostly fixated on seonghwa in the video. you complimented his handsomeness, his voice, the lines he had, the way he fit the concept perfectly. he couldn't help but feel a little annoyed.
"yeah seonghwa looks great," he muttered and cleared his throat, watching the music video with you.
"you look handsome too," you quickly added, realising you hadnt said anything about your actual boyfriend because eoyu were too busy gawking over your bias.
"oh no its too late for that now!" jongho said playfully and poked your side, causing you to let out a half yelp, half laugh.
"i'm sorry baby, i just got... distracted?"
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jmdbjk · 1 year
Text
Man at work.
 Apparently working more than we thought he was...
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Kookie bought a pack of 500 straws so he could exercise his vocal chords because he saw Sam Smith do it. But alas, he didn’t think it was working for him. Nevertheless! they won’t go to waste! because he can slurp down his highball much faster using a straw...
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This cute goofball is the global spokesperson for Calvin Klein jeans... he mentioned that the Calvin Klein video was up and he acted bashful about it. He did say when doing these types of endorsements as a group is one thing, but doing them personally on his own, the product must be something he personally endorses. And he also said he will be embarrassed when people speak to him about his ad images. Perception vs reality. 
He tells us he’s cleaned out his closet recently and only kept all his black clothes, but now he says he will wear Calvins now. One thing to look forward to... Calvin Klein clothing silhouettes are typically cut close to the body. Meaning they are not the oversized baggy things that we normally see on JK. Just sayin’! Bring on the airport fashion! 
He asks to please show Calvin Klein a lot of support. Check! Marked off the list! I believe that company is scrambling to actually have any merchandise in stock this week, right? They weren’t prepared. Mission accomplished, JK. 
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For a few moments he thought he spoiled Jimin’s episode of Suchwita because he couldn’t find it on Youtube. Sus, Youtube. 
Aside from the adorable heart eyes he had and the knowing grins and outright laughter while he watched, Jungkook nodded when Jimin said if he could go to any point in time, past or future, he would choose 2025 when they would all be together again. Kookie nodded vigorously again and let out a deep, wistful sigh while watching that brief segment. Was he getting a little lump in his throat too, just like I was?
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Yoongi then says “we all have an idea of what things will be like when we come back” and Jimin agrees and when Yoongi asks Jimin what he thinks it will be like, Jimin says “we’d all be back together after we’re done.” I am assuming he means military service, and that he is curious to know how it will be and that’s why he wants to go to that point in time. 
Jimin, we all want to fast forward to that time. None of us want you all to have to take this mandatory break and we all want it to be over with as soon as possible. 
When it was over, Kookie fixed himself a fresh drink, took a potty break and then sat wordlessly on the couch for at least 15 minutes listening to music and pondering the universe (it seemed). Songs he queued up: “12:45″ by Etham; “thoughtboutu” by Karencici; “Another Day” by Gervs; “Adrenaline” by Lauv; “Where Does the Love Go” by by María Isabel and Yeek and “Honeymoon” by Johnny Stimson.
He sweetly sang along to “Honeymoon.” That song has a similar vibe to “10,000 Hours” and I wish to god Kookie would create a song with that ambience because it would become one of those all time greatest hits.
JK read a few comments (FINALLY?) he randomly says he was wanting to look up Jimin’s lyrics...? Jungkook and his never-ending fight with his Apple TV commands ensues. And he finally finds what he’s looking for... the BigHit intro.
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He proceeded to fanboi during Set Me Free Pt 2 even being a tad slack-jawed and droolly when the 2nd verse started and Jimin’s cheat sheet tattoos were on full display, JUST LIKE US! 
Done satisfying his need to know the lyric was “maze” and watching the entire video anyway, he quickly found a Jimin compilation video. Are you shitting me? 
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Now, we all know how insidious the Youtube algorithm is. If you watch ONE video of any genre/topic... what happens? YT serves up several more from the same creator or same topic or genre. Watch a reaction video? Then a dozen videos by various Youtube reactors will be summoned. Watch a Korean street food video? Then you will see a dozen videos about Korean street food. FACTS!
Every time you go to Youtube after that it’s like trying to get rid of cockroaches. You spend some time hitting the “not interested/don’t show me this shit ever again” option or else that will be all you ever see forever and ever amen. 
So my point is, that Jimin compilation video was not random. Youtube isn’t a random platform, it is very articulated to deliver cocaine in video form straight to your brain in order to get you addicted so you keep coming back. 
Anyway. Kookie again was like a kid watching cartoons and Army comments were totally forgotten while he watched this fan made video. 
The evening full of Jimin, laughing at a fan made compilation video and a song that was playing called, “up at night”, by Kehlani featuring Justin Bieber, stirred something inside him and the lightning bolt of inspiration hit him and that was it. Game over for the live broadcast.
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I’m glad he’s working. I’m glad he’s doing well. He’s still our Kookie and he still loves his Jiminie and the rest of his hyungs. 
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worldheadcanons · 10 months
Text
☆ stalker au: you flirting back!
starring. . . gender neutral reader and america + england. warning: some nsfw towards the end of alfred’s part. general stalker stuff.
author notes; something self indulgent fr
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> alfred f. jones!
— he called you up, thinking it’d be a normal phone call just like any other. he’d tease you before scaring you a bit. then jones would hang up just as you were getting ready to chastise him. he likes to keep you on your toes at all times. today was different, however.. today it was you keeping him on his toes. you had been thinking about his calls for a while, wondering how to deal with them. after a while, you came to a conclusion— it was so simple, so obvious that you were amazed that you hadn’t figured it out sooner! it was all a prank. probably for television or something. this guy wasn’t really a stalker.. he was just pretending to be one. it was the only clear answer. it was the only answer that you were comfortable with accepting. with that in mind… you decided to give his prank show a little bit of new content. something.. exciting. 
— “hey gorgeous,” alfred said, hiding by one of the bushes in your backyard. it’s a little cramped but he had made a little nook out of the small space between your bushes. it was his home away from home. “how was your day today?”
— you responded normally, deciding to keep things tame for now. conversation was pretty smooth until he suddenly chose to switch things up. he just loved to creep you out for shits and giggles. “i can see you in your bedroom through your upstairs window,” jones said casually, idly messing with a piece of his hair as he spoke, “you look nice today, by the way.”
— this was the moment you were waiting for. he wanted prank content? fine! here it was. you paused for a second before replying, “thank you.. you know.. if you’re nice, maybe i’ll give you something better to look at.. something more.. interesting.” you spoke into the phone softly, your voice low and somewhat seductive in nature. the tone of your voice alone was enough to make alfred’s eyes widen and his face flush red. he snapped his head to look at your window, intently watching as you laid yourself on your bed. regardless of whether or not it was supposed to be a sexy sort of movement, he found it wildly attractive. and just like that, he was horny…
— there was nothing but silence as he tried to get himself together. of course, you didn’t know about his.. situation. you started to feel a little guilty. what if it wasn’t a prank show but.. a pranking youtube channel? like.. the kind for kids? oh, god.. here you were, trying to be flirty on a video for a kids channel. “sorry, was that bad for the video? i assumed this was an adult prank show.. you can just cut it, i’ll keep things PG from now on, i promise.” you apologized into the phone, frowning to yourself.
— after a few moments more of silence from the other side of the phone, jones finally spoke up again. “no, no.. no, it’s perfect,” he mumbled after a bit, running a hand through his hair as he tried to force himself into calming down. “don’t apologize. the uh.. prank show channel? we can use this, don’t worry. hey, i’ve gotta end the call now. edit the footage and whatnot. i’ll call you later to hash out details, ‘kay?”
— alfred hung up shortly afterwards. you were satisfied with how things turned out, figuring that the problem had been solved. unfortunately for you, the problem had only worsened.. after your little show today, he was more desperate than ever to have you. somehow, someway.. someday.. you’d be his and he’d be yours. but enough of that, right now he had to hurry and get home. he didn’t really feel like jerking off in your bushes. 
> arthur kirkland!
 — you frowned as your phone rang. there was no doubt in your mind that it was your little admirer who was calling. he’d spoken with you several times over the phone, always kind and polite, but he made no effort to actually get with you. after a while it started to feel like a very long winded prank.. the kind that started in middle school and seemed to get worse in highschool. the kind of prank you hated most. the emotional ones. you hated to admit it but you had sort of fell for the man through the phone. he genuinely seemed to care about you.. or at least, he acted like he cared about you. your mind seemed to wander towards the worst possible situations. the thought of having a real stalker never crossed your mind however the thought of a highschool bully or maybe a workplace enemy prank calling you, that crossed your mind numerous times. 
— you were usually so rational but the thought of someone trying to pull a prank and tug at your emotions.. it pissed you off, to be frank. so when you answered the phone, you decided to give this prank caller a show. you would flirt back. they’d be so freaked out that they’d either confess or immediately hang up and never call again. that’s how it usually went with ‘jokes’ like this. once you show any sort of interest back, they drop you just to shatter your heart. well this time you were ready. this time you were in control.
— conversation started off like it always did with talking about your day and how you’ve been. you weren’t one to flirt out of nowhere, so you let the mood build itself up. fortunately for you, there was a moment of banter that was the perfect opportunity. you could hear him chuckle over the phone, probably about something teasing you had said. you took the chance without hesitation, holding the phone close to your mouth so every word would be heard perfectly. “oh secret admirer,” you cooed, “i feel like we’ve really gotten close.. i’m dying to know who you are. i really want to meet you.”
— you were flirty but not seductive, as anything that even remotely hinted towards sex could be used as blackmail against you. you were a master at this game. there was silence for a long while, interrupted only by the sound of you shifting your phone from your hand and laying it on your kitchen counter so you could cook for yourself and talk at the same time. you assumed that the silence was a good thing, that maybe your pranker was rethinking their thoughts and regretting your actions. you had no clue that arthur was on the other end of the phone completely awestruck.
— oh how he’s dreamed of this moment! really, it’s like everything he’s dreamed of and more! you loved him, you really loved him, and here you were, setting yourself up on a silver platter for him! he was immediately nervous as he’d always imagined you confessing but he never thought of what would come after that. the silence was just him thinking. thinking about whether or not this was a trap.. thinking about how to reply to you.. thinking so hard about the opportunity laid out in front of him. kirkland responded after a bit longer. “sorry for the silence, love.. i feel the same way, i really do.. i want to be with you.. i want to be with you all the time,” he began. 
— you froze like a deer in the headlights as he started to speak. he didn’t notice your lack of a response though, continuing to proclaim his love. “i spend all day and night thinking of you.. every dollar i make is for you, every.. every single moment i’m not with you it’s like torture for me. i’m not happy when i’m not watching you or thinking of you.” as arthur rambled on and on, he stopped controlling his voice. his accent slipped through and it sounded vaguely familiar.. but you didn’t have any time to pick apart his voice. you were more focused on his words, his admission to.. to stalking you. to being a stalker.
— admittedly.. you had known in the back of your mind from the beginning it really wasn’t a prank. you weren’t stupid.. but you had gotten swept away in your emotions regardless.. and now look at you. your stalker thinks you love him back. 
— “i’m.. willing to show my face.. if you’re willing to unlock the back door. i promise i won’t try anything. i’m already outside.. do hurry though.. i feel a bit odd about just standing here, haha..”
— not only that.. but he’s apparently standing by your back door waiting for you to open it. lucky you.
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glowingmushroom0 · 8 months
Text
Top Ten TBR for August
1. The Iron Widow by Xiran Jay Zhao (currently reading)
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Back in December, I was re-watching a bunch of Zhao’s videos on YouTube and in one of them she was promoting her novel Iron Widow. While I’ve never been too into mecha-novels in sci-fi, I decided to give this one a try! I’ve been finding the mechanics of the mechs really interesting, and I find Zetian a very engaging character. It also helps that Zhao explains some of the history of the real-life Wu Zetian in two of her YouTube videos. I still haven’t finished the book, but I am pretty close to finishing it.
2. Epithet Erased: Prison of Plastic by Brendan Blaber (currently re-reading)
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This novel is a part of the Epithet Erased series on JelloApocalypse’s YouTube channel, which also includes several trailers for this novel and a part of chapter 1 of the novel’s audiobook. I remember seeing the original show on YouTube when it was coming out and it’s a really fun series! This part of the novel focuses on the story of Molly Blyndeff, a twelve-year-old with an epithet, a power that depends on whatever word the epithet is based off of. The story focuses on Molly’s relationship with her older sister Lorelai, and how her friends support her and try to help her as she tries to stop her sister from expanding her dream world within their family’s toy store. I’m actually listening to the audiobook while writing this post! I really recommend the audiobook version of this novel, the voice actors did an excellent job!
3. Everyone in This Room Will Someday Be Dead by Emily Austen
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I actually was recommended this book a couple of years ago by an aunt and a cousin of mine. I had gone to a Catholic school and they both knew I was pan (I still haven’t come out to them as agender though, but that’s because I don’t see or talk to them very often). However, what actually convinced me to try the book was an old friend group that started a book club, and this was their first book. I still haven’t read it because I didn’t end up making it to the meetings, but I am interested in reading it.
4. The Henna Wars by Adiba Jaigirdar
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This novel I was interested in more from the author than the subject matter, but that doesn’t mean I’m not interested at all. I first read Jaigirdar’s Hani and Ishu’s Guide to Fake Dating and really enjoyed it, so I wanted to read more of her works! That’s when I learned that this was her debut novel, and I wanted to compare the two. Plus, I will always find some joy from learning about different art forms through writing in novels. The most I know about henna so far is from a friend of mine who had another friend who wanted to practice henna on them. Because of that, I’d like to learn more about how Jaigirdar depicts henna artists.
5. A Queer Dharma: Yoga and Meditations for Liberation by Jacoby Ballard
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I actually found this book at a book exchange that was at an LGBTQ+ friendly event. My friend and I are both interested in this book because we’re both into learning about different kinds of religion and how to express different kinds of spirituality. From what I’ve looked over with the book it talks about how queer people create their own spaces within Buddhism and yoga.
6. So This is Ever After by F. T. Lukens
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I’ll go more in-depth with this particular choice in the next book, however the main reasons why I was interested in this novel is because I had already gotten a book from this author that I was pretty interested in. And after looking through another book of Lukens’s (or Lukens’), they also seemed to be really interested in fantasy, especially magic. I also thought it was an interesting idea that the story takes place after the typical “ever after” of defeating an evil king.
7. In Deeper Waters by F. T. Lukens
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Now this is the novel that I originally found F.T. Lukens from, and the main reason why I was interested in reading this novel is because I love pirates. I also found myself hooked from just the summary of the novel. When people say a character is mysterious, I don’t really know if they’re going to be mysterious until they appear in the story. However, the summary does show how mysterious Athlen can be, considering he’s introduced as a prisoner on a burning ship. So, I’m interested in learning more about Athlen just from the summary.
8. Red, White & Royal Blue by Casey McQuiston
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This novel has a bit more controversial reason for why I want to read it. I originally got this book because it was popular, and I was vaguely interested, but then I started hearing about debates on whether this is good MLM (men-loving-men, not multi-level-marketing) representation. However, I then had another friend that’s a part of the queer community that read the book and he liked it. So I wanted to read the book to figure out my own opinion on the novel. Plus I thought it would be a good time to read it since the novel’s getting it’s own show soon. 
9. Everything You Ever Wanted to Know about Trans (But Were Afraid to Ask) by Brynn Tannehill
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This book is less for me and more for family reasons. I’m not going to go into too much detail for privacy reasons, but a lot of my family still don’t quite understand much about what it exactly means to be transgender, especially not someone who’s under the non-binary umbrella. So I wanted to read this book and see if it’d be a good fit for some of my family members who do read.
10. Video Game Storytelling: What Every Developer Needs to Know about Narrative Techniques by Evan Skolnick
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This book is more for my own learning and future career. My specific dream job is to create a video game story, which would go into scriptwriting. However, most of the creative writing advice and tips I’ve gotten were either for fiction in general, or for short stories and poetry. This book might be able to teach more about scriptwriting, but also how to develop scripts for video games.
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wosomarvel · 7 months
Text
communication - 02
warnings: light angst (idk if this counts as angst or not)
also, i'm so happy vilda is finally out, even if it is disappointing that it took so long. next, rubiales.
contigo jenni
-----
in the few months since sim had started at her new job, she was surprised at how well she'd been able to settle in. she'd gotten her new office set up with the necessary computers and camera equipment. she'd spent a lot of her down time roaming the facility when the girls weren't around. the young girl had filmed enough content to put up several posts on the lionesses' official social media accounts.
so far, the engagement was increasing compared to the content published before her arrival. sim knew better than to take her foot off the pedal, though. her drive to be good enough, to succeed, to be wanted would never let her rest.
that's how she found herself hunched over her laptop in her flat, empty coffee cups littering the desk. the sound of cars passing by outside the flat served as a tempting lullaby. sim's eyes stayed shut a little longer each time she blinked.
she was working on a short video for the lionesses' youtube page, clipping together pictures, short segments of video, and interview-like questions she'd asked the team during the most recent camp.
sim had had a great deal of fun at camp. she'd stayed in the same hotel as the team, which allowed her to catch some golden moments off the pitch that otherwise wouldn't be made public.
over the course of the week and a half she'd spent with the girls, she'd also found herself falling into an easy banter with most of them. she'd become fast friends with ella and alessia, the girls doing their best to bring sim out of her shell. leah had taken more of a watchful role, ensuring the young girl was finding everything okay.
as for the rest of the team, sim found a comfortable balance between friends and coworkers. she was alright with the more professional role she inhabited with them, content to observe and capture their interactions and movements through a lens.
even though it had only been a couple of months at the new job, it made sim uneasy how easy it was to fall into a rhythm with the team. she didn't want to be too much for anyone. she was constantly worrying about overstepping boundaries, or being too annoying. despite the multiple invites to go grab coffee with alessia and some of the other arsenal players since the end of camp, sim found it hard to believe that the girls really enjoyed her company that much.
the sound of her phone buzzing snapped sim out of her trance. she rubbed her eyes, reading over the text she had just received from alessia.
leah, beth and i are grabbing coffee after training later. want to join?
sim sighed, running a hand through the mess of curls on her head. she was reluctant to agree. she wanted to finish her current project and have the video published by wednesday morning. sim's back straightened when she realized that was now tomorrow morning.
another buzz from her phone.
leah says you don't have a choice. we'll pick you up at 3:30 (:
sim's eyebrows furrowed at the small smiley face tacked on to the end of the message, her grip on her phone slackening. she was reluctant to agree to the girl's demands, the self-imposed deadline looming dark.
she scratched at the skin just behind her ear, a nervous habit she'd picked up who knows when. she shot off a simple 'ok' to alessia, knowing her friend was too stubborn to relent. sim set the device down, turning her attention back to the editing software open on her laptop.
4:39 am. sim considered grabbing an energy drink and powering through the assignment in front of her, in the end, deciding against it. if she pushed herself any further, she'd be dead on her feet when she met less and the girls for coffee later.
sim set her computer down beside the bed, finally allowing herself to surrender to sleep for the first time in almost 48 hours.
-----
they were late. very late.
sim was leaning against the cold concrete pillar outside her building, the surface reminding her of the sides of a swimming pool. she might as well be in one, with how hard it was raining.
she glanced at the time blinking on her watch. 4:09 pm. she sighed. she'd only ended up sleeping for 5 hours. she'd woken up to thoughts of the stupid youtube video she was supposed to have uploaded. it seemed as though her brain would not let her catch a break. she couldn't escape her anxiety, even in her sleep.
"oh my gosh, i'm so sorry we're late. we were reviewing film after training and breaking down the next match-"
"less, it's okay." sim cut off the rambling of the forward, allowing herself to be guided into the backseat of the sedan that had just pulled up, with leah driving and beth occupying the front passenger seat.
sim sank into the black leather seats, grateful for the warmth the car provided., setting her crutch sideways on her lap. she watched the city move by through the window, running her fingers over the stitching on the seats. she was still new to the city, not quite acquainted with the packed streets of london. she'd moved down here for her new job with the lionesses.
sim was secretly grateful for the number of women's football teams based in london. despite the size of the city, it was nice that so many of the lionesses played here. it made the weight of the loneliness she felt ease a bit.
"what's your order, then?" asked leah as they stepped into the small coffee shop.
"oh, i'll just order mine separately."
"that's nonsense. i invited you out, i pay," leah asserted. sim let out a long exhale, knowing she wasn't going to be allowed to pay for her own.
"i'll just do an iced coffee with two creams and two sugars. but i've got next," sim replied.
accepting money from others had always made sim feel uncomfortable. it was something that had been drilled into her head growing up, a fundamental piece of punjabi culture. never accept money from others, and always offer to pay. sim decided to forgo the last part. the move to london had almost bankrupted her and while her new wages were certainly a nice increase from the waitressing job she'd worked previously, her bank account wasn't exactly thriving.
"what were you doing up so early this morning?" alessia asked as they settled into a corner booth.
sim raised an eyebrow at the question. "i could ask you the same thing."
"i had an early night and got up early for a run with the team. you still haven't answered my question."
"yeah, at least we know less is sleeping. you on the other hand... you've looked better, i'll leave it at that," beth added with a chuckle.
"thanks, beth, you really know how to make a girl smile," sim said, a smile taking over her face.
"alright, seriously, answer the question now. enough stalling." sim could see the gentle concern behind the smile on leah's face.
she didn't know why leah was so worried. she knew that maybe her sleeping habits were less than healthy, but she couldn't understand why leah cared. they'd known each other for barely three months. that hadn't stopped the defender from taking on a sibling type role in sim's life, though.
she shrugged, sipping on the coffee before setting it back down on the table. "just working on this new video for the youtube. i've gotta have it up by tomorrow morning." sim kept her focus on the surface of the table, and the way the condensation from her cup was pooling around the edge.
eye contact had never been something that came easy to sim.
alessia's eyebrows furrowed. "so you decided you'd pull another all-nighter to get it done?"
"technically, it wasn't an all-nighter because after i got your text, i went to bed," sim mumbled, swirling the ice around her cup. she used the sleeve of her sweater to wipe at the pool of water on the table.
leah frowned. "what do you mean, another all-nighter?"
sim groaned. leah was like an annoying, overbearing parent. she was only 5 years older than sim, which only frustrated the girl even more.
"sim, i know you're worried about keeping the job, but running yourself into the ground won't do you any favors. i've heard some of the higher-ups talking, and they're already impressed. it sounds like we've already got some new sponsorships coming through. take care of yourself, alright? ease up."
sim looked up to meet leah's eyes. she saw the worry reflected in the tightness of leah's eyebrows, the way her eyes roved over her own face, taking in the bags under sim's eyes and then down to the hunch of her shoulders.
"we've got tomorrow off as a rest day. why don't you come by my place? i'm having some of the girls come around for a movie marathon," alessia offered.
a smile graced sim's face. she ignored the way her heart leaped at the chance to spend time with alessia, labelling it as friendly excitement.
"i'll be there."
"you're a good kid, sim. you work hard, but remember to rest sometimes too," beth said softly, putting an arm around sim's shoulder and squeezing gently.
sim allowed herself to lean into the comfort. she was exhausted. and technically, she reminded herself, the video didn't actually have to be up until saturday. as much as she wanted it up early to impress her superiors, she knew the girls were right.
sim let herself enjoy the rest of the afternoon with her friends, joining in on the laughter and jokes, letting herself get carried away in conversation. it didn't hurt that at some point, alessia had reached across the table and taken sim's hands in her own, playing with her fingers as the day progressed.
sim missed the knowing looks leah and beth exchanged after glancing down at hers and alessia's hands.
-----
"are you going to introduce us to your girl or what?" the voice of one kim little rang out as everyone got settled onto the sofas in alessia's living room.
a red flush took over sim's face. sim had been ignoring the way alessia made her feel when they were inhabiting the same space.
she found herself naturally drawn to alessia's blonde hair and blue eyes, to the way her eyes crinkled when she smiled, to her eyelashes and her smile and the soft skin of her hands and the warm embrace of her body. she made sim feel safe and free from judgement.
sim ignored the feeling of warmth she experienced at even the slightest touch from the footballer. she ignored the feeling of satisfaction whenever she managed to make alessia laugh. she brushed all those feelings aside, pushed them down until they were nothing more than a quiet voice at the back of her mind. after all, they'd only known each other a few months and there was no way alessia russo would reciprocate. she was way out of sim's league.
"she's not my girl, but fine. guys, this is sim, she works in media for the national team. she's also a dear friend, so be nice." sim knew her blush would only have gotten worse with the arm alessia had slung over her shoulder. she was grateful that the lights were already dimmed in preparation for the movie marathon, or she would have to deal with relentless teasing from leah and beth. knowing them, they would've roped in lotte as well.
sim waved shyly to the room. most of the team, she'd never met. she'd met lina in passing once at london colney when alessia had asked for a ride after training. the short-haired girl had simply waved at the two before getting into her own car and driving away.
"well, sim, don't just stand there. come make yourself comfortable," leah teased. "and don't worry," she addressed the rest of the team, "once she gets comfortable she's not nearly as quiet."
sim moved to take the open spot next to leah on the ground, leaning against the couch, alessia settling in on her other side.
by the end of the first movie, sim was trying and failing to keep from falling asleep. even worse, every time she nodded off, her head ended up resting on alessia's shoulder.
the 6th time it happened, alessia had had enough. she wrapped her arm around sim's body and pulled her closer, tugging the blanket they were sharing up to cover their shoulders.
sim relaxed slightly, appreciating the warmth surrounding her. if she'd been more alert, she would've had the sense to feel embarrassed. instead, the next time she nodded off, she stayed sleeping.
alessia stilled, not daring to move a muscle in case it woke the younger girl up.
"let her sleep," leah whispered softly. "she's earned it."
alessia nodded in agreement. she brought a hand up to sim's curly hair, carding her hands through in an attempt to keep her sleeping.
while the two shared this peaceful moment, beth leaned off of the couch above them, stretching to grab a photo before sending it to the lioness's group chat.
alessia glanced at the notification on her phone but couldn't bring herself to care for the remarks the rest of her national teammates had already starting making. not with sim's warm body curled up against hers under the blanket. she only hoped the teasing wouldn't scare her away.
alessia was determined to bring sim out of her shell, to find out why the younger girl was trying so hard to keep the team at such a distance.
the team had taken a liking to sim, immediately accepting her as a part of the family. they'd never done so with a member of staff before, but they couldn't help enjoying the time sim spent with them. she did her job with such care and respect for their privacy that they'd wanted to look out for her even without their coach's request.
sim made sure to get their approval before posting something online, wanting to make sure she wasn't crossing boundaries or sharing information that the girls weren't comfortable with having public. she reminded them to rest and recover properly. she never asked questions that made the team uncomfortable. she was so easy to work with and the team had taken her in without hesitation, wanting to return the kindness she was so intent on showing to them.
they would let sim fall asleep on their shoulders any time, anywhere, if it meant the girl got some rest.
leah smiled softly as she watched alessia press a gentle kiss to sim's hair before quietly asking the rest of the team what movie they should play next. the gunners took care to make sure they wouldn't wake anyone up.
sim didn't know it, but she'd found herself a family.
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