#four seasons total landscaping meme

[blorbodiaz]

jerry’s pizza becoming a booming business overnight is the romanian equivalent of four seasons total landscaping

#i hope someone understands this #angel talks #jerry’s pizza #andrew tate #four seasons total landscaping #nov 5th #memes

[whydidisavethistomyphone]

Happy anniversary to this

#four seasons total landscaping #trump memes #dashcon #ball pit

[greatseedling]

✿ permanent plotting

woah, i’ve been here on and off for four years with martel and i’ve apparently never made one of these?? better late than never, i suppose!! as much as i love all the spontaneous dynamics that have emerged over the years, i’d like to consider some longer-lasting and current relationship dynamics for martel. 

as per usual, by liking this post you are expressing permission for me to...

hit you up ooc to talk plotting and things regarding our muses

reach out to you during events and other group activities for plotting

send you a butt-ton of memes on fridays

engage with your minis and opens

slap you starters (with permission ofc ofc)

for transparency, i prefer to interact ooc with other 18+ muns only. thank you!

below is a non-all-encompassing list of vibes to start. feel free to like this post or comment on it and i’ll reach out to you, or beep me if you want to reach me ooc and talk more about any or all possibilities:

✿ ACQUAINTANCES/FRIENDS this is a pretty easy place to land yourself, martel is a very loving and gentle person who can easily find the good in just about everyone. if your muse breaths... they could probably land themselves in here. while she’s friendly with most, it actually takes quite a bit of trust building for her to open up to the more sensitive bits of her life. her friendships are something she takes very seriously-- she’d bend over backwards for them. catch her stopping by to see your muse often, bringing them food and giving them tons of physical proximity. generally, if u just need a friend, she’s a wonderful one to end up with, and she particularly is good with those lacking self esteem especially.

✿ FOUND FAMILY did u want a mom?? a big sister?? just a mom friend?? she’s got you covered. martel is very maternal, especially with children and teens. she’ll fuss over you, set your bed time, and occasionally baby you. oops. she’s got a softeness for children, having raised her baby bro. if ur a child, you’ve probably already been adopted in her mind. she’s got a very fussy bit to her, she means well, but she might step into well-intentioned patronizing territory.

✿ ENEMIES you have to be a really unredeemable person who is hellbent and back to being terrible to land here firmly, but even if that was the case you’d likely be picking a fight with the other kharlan heros before she’d ever have a chance to response. if you want to be mean to her or have your muse hate her, you’re 100% welcome, but she doesn’t do conflict so... good luck. she’ll still try to win your favor.

✿ ROMANCE oh boy, good luck. while certainly possible, martel has a lot of complicated feelings here. she’s demisexual, and requires a close bond with someone before romance can truly be on the table, but its totally possible. sometimes she can come across as flirtatious, but most the time is unintentional. but if down the road something connects between our muses, let me know! martel has a partner, so i’m no longer open to romantic dynamics 👍

✿ HEALERS although she’s perhaps not in the best shape right this minute, martel’s a very seasoned magical healer and is studying human forms of herbal healing. she makes aromatherapy products and is great at bandaging up your scrapes and cuts. let her nurse your sicknesses. and injuries, she’ll take good care of you. conversely, if your muse knows healing, especially medicine/non-magical methods... teach her!! she’s super interested in learning more.

✿ GARDENERS/ARTISTS martel has been volunteering for years in community gardening and landscaping around spirale. she’s always found planting, moving, and tending to the flowers and bushes around the different sectors. maybe your muse has a green thumb! or maybe your muse is just looking for some fresh air! she’ll teach you about plants n nature...or even help you with your plant babies! or maybe your muse loves music? martel plays the panpipe as a little hobby and loves music and dance... she would love to listen to your muse play music or learn a new instrument. she also is secretly a fabulous still life sketcher. she does really impressive charcoal sketches, and she’d love to do a portrait of your muse!! arts n crafts are always welcome.

✿ WAR SURVIVORS / HALF-ELVES / FELLOW DEAD PEOPLE  hello, let’s bond. there’s a lot of shared experience here with people intimately involved in wars, discrimination, and death. she was born into a longstanding war, and comes from a world that was hostile and cruel to her. she died once, woot woot!!  i think there’s a lot of possibility to find companionship in shared experiences and this might be a good compliment for forging a friendship. lets get deep into it.

✿ TEACHERS so martel has zero education. she can’t read or write much beyond a kindergarden level. i think it’d be really sweet if someone with patience would like to try and teach her!! she’s a bit anxious, but she’d make a good student. ooooor, if you’d like to teach her how to cook or do something else... power to you! she’s curious, so she’ll totally

✿ ETC literally slap me with whatever vibe you’ve got. let create something spicy.

#sets this down and lays on the floor #i may wake up in the morning with more to add but 4 years later... i finally did it #isola rp ad #i guess?? idk i love u tho <3 come write with me

[beradan]

Whan that Novembre with his windes colde Hath called out the voteres yonge and olde And maketh hem to stande in lines longe, To signes wave, and eek to singe songes; Whan Georgia hath hirself at laste allyd With Grittye and his cursed staringe eye, And hem that counte hath made the weary weep, The pundites babbel (and a fewe not sleep); Whan eek the Elyphaunte with all his host The trump hath sounden, and hath made his boast, Around yfuckt, and eek hath finden oute, Than longen folk to go to Four Seasouns Total Landscapinge .

#you know what #I am a lot less sorry about inflicting this on tumblr than on twitter #four seasons total landscaping meme #chaucer #for a given value of chaucer #which is: not much #oh yeah also: #election #2020 #american politics

[scaredenglishmajor]

If anyone deserves a raise it’s the employee from four seasons total landscaping who answered the phone and went “yup, we can set up a podium and everything” and just acted like nothing was out of the ordinary.

#ap lit and comp #ap lit memes #ap literature #books and literature #english literature #literature #studyblr #studying #studying for finals #studyspo #trump #election #student #college #uni #university #four seasons total landscaping #four seasons #Biden #vote #donald trump

[littlewalken]

#four seasons total landscaping #philadelphia #memes

[elwenyere]

Theory: some nerd has invented time travel, but the only way they can affect the timeline is by reblogging content from 2012 Tumblr.

#ball pit #four seasons total landscaping #time heist but your only weapon is really old memes

[serenata-your-neighborhood-lefty]

#sir this is a four seasons total landscaping #trump #election #us politics #politics memes #america #usa #republican #donald trump #election memes #2020 election #leftblr #left #anti trump

[fairy-feather]

#election 2020 #memes #my edits #lydia has the perfect reckless energy I needed for this #pride & prejudice 2005 #four seasons total landscaping

[cardiaccrisis]

Four Seasons Landscaping Employee!Crowley x Sex Shop Owner! Aziraphale AU

Please consider a shop that's half dedicated to adult toys and half dedicated to erotica books throughout the ages. Aziraphale is just as protective of his books as he is in canon, though he's an enthusiastic shopkeeper on the toy side (though the historical toys are for DISPLAY ONLY). He pitched it to Heaven as a store dedicated to reducing the sin of infidelity and encouraging good sexual health. Luckily the archangels just let him do his thing and don't ask too many questions.

Crowley could own the landscaping company but he's cultivating some sloth, so he remains as the perennial employee, often taking vacations to do his assigned temptations and leaving work early to go hang out with Aziraphale. Crowley's planted flowers bloom even out of season, and he drives the lawn-mowers and other machines about five times faster than they should be able to go, so there's nothing for the company owner to compulsion about.

Picture Aziraphale's shop as essentially the same as his canon bookshop but glass cases with all sorts of colorful toys in different sizes and shapes lining the walls. Aziraphale talks to customers with very explicit yet hilariously outdated verbiage and dresses exactly the same, so it's a Bizarre experience for everyone. But the angel has a sixth sense for his recommendations & advice, and that keeps customers braving his weird shop hours in search of a good time.

Most of their historical shenanigans remain the same, though Crowley's career as a landscaper means that he'd probably be the gardener in the Warlock era. Warlock delights in riding the lawnmower with Crowley, which is obviously a lesson in destroying and reshaping the earth in his image. While Aziraphale takes up the Nanny role or perhaps a cook? 🤔

Also Aziraphale goes to visit Crowley at the landscape shop of course... Crowley always has a little bouquet of sweet-smelling twigs and flowers for Aziraphale to put in his shop, and he maintains the grounds on Aziraphale's shop. Aziraphale loves watching him garden from the window. Sometimes Crowley arranges a lovely little picnic for them too!

But of course, Aziraphale owning a sex shop is likely going to change the nature of his relationship with Crowley in some interesting ways... 👀

!WAR!NING for explicit discussions of sex toy usage!

At some point after the opening of the shop, Crowley stupidly volunteers to test out Aziraphale's new stock, and Aziraphale jumps on the chance.

At first Crowley starts testing the toys in the back room with Aziraphale just outside, reading him some choice erotica to get him in the mood. Then Aziraphale is in the same room looking away. Then Aziraphale sitting next to him in the armchair, sneaking peeks, then petting his hair, then on the couch with Crowley, stroking his face and shoulders, and finally he has Crowley in his lap, holding him close while Crowley squirms in pleasure and snuggles close. Needless to say, Crowley quickly develops a Pavlovian reaction to that particular couch. 😂

Unfortunately, Aziraphale's presence severely biases Crowley, so he thinks all the toys are great, even if they're only usable by flexible snake demons and not actual human beings. But perhaps Crowley's favorite toys are the ones modeled after Aziraphale's Efforts (even if Crowley isn't aware of the fact...).

Consider: Aziraphale pressing soft kisses onto Crowley's neck, one arm securely around his waist and his other hand working a toy into Crowley. Crowley clinging to Aziraphale's arms and making happy noises, he's long ago given up trying to suppress his moans of "angel". Crowley leaning his head against Aziraphale's shoulder and lets his angel guide him through several orgasms, knowing that when he's done Aziraphale will wrap his wings around him protectively while Crowley naps in his arms, perfectly safe and satiated.

Also consider Aziraphale gently correcting Crowley's techniques with the toys and helping him lube up, wanting to make sure Crowley has the best possible time... And Aziraphale using the toys as well, before Crowley uses it and perhaps afterwards as well, pining as he imagines/remembers Crowley's enjoyment. Meanwhile, Crowley is thinking something along the lines of "clearly this is just business, Aziraphale kissing my face isn't real but I'll pretend it is because I really wish it was."

Post Armageddon't, after years of pining while doing "market research" together, Crowley and Aziraphale have their "actual" first time together. And Aziraphale is delighted to find out that Crowley has a whole suite of new reactions and noises and movements when they're together like this, and getting to kiss and touch each other without any toys or excuses in the way is transcendental.

#four seasons total landscaping #Good omens au #good omens fic #Ineffable Husbands #ineffable partners #I'm posting this because I'm way too slow a writer to be able to do an actual fic in a reasonable amount of time rip #but it's still fun to think about! #also Crowley gets SO MANY hell points © for the whole Tr*no fiasco there LMAO he laughs his ass off for days and delights in all the memes #nsft #four omens total landscaping

[claredaly]

I think I’m really funny. @taylorswift @taylornation

#taylor swift #tswiftedit #taylurking #taylor #folklore #august #four seasons total landscaping #philadelphia #election #election 2020 #politics #us politics #political memes #taylor swift memes #13 #red #1989 #rep #fearless #speak now #debut #self titled #ts13 #meet me behind the mall

[tomhiddlesun]

#winnie the pooh #fancy #COVId #memes #meme #lol #four seasons #four seasons total landscaping #trump

[internetbt]

#four seasons #fours seasons total landscaping #rudy giuliani #donald trump #trump memes #trump2020 #the office memes #the office

[gayfertilitygoddess]

The family that memes together stays together...

#us politics #us election #election memes #handshake meme #memes #four seasons total landscaping #graphic design is my passion

[dizzyhslightlyvoided]

Hidden Star in Four Seasons Total Landscaping

#shenanigans #touhou #hidden star in four seasons #four seasons total landscaping #fusion is just a cheap tactic to make weak memes stronger

[abduct-me-helen]

Lonelyeyes And Their H̶o̶s̶t̶a̶g̶e̶ Valued Employee Visit Four Seasons Hotel Landscaping

-

Rosie was sick. Now, this wasn’t common. Rosie never got sick; that woman was made of steel and rods, or she seemed it, until a few days had passed where Rosie had not been able to come to work due to a case of the flu. This inevitably had led, through one thing to another to another after that, to Elias, Peter and Martin, standing at the entrance to Four Seasons Total Landscaping, next to a sex shop and a crematorium.

Martin was numb at this point, choosing to drown out Peter and Elias’ bickering by reminiscing on the events that had brought them here.

We live in a world of fear gods. This might as well happen, Martin thought.

After Rosie had fallen through with the flu, Elias had been forced to pick up her slack, and for once, schedule things himself. There was a three-day conference for all heads and sponsors of all branches of the institute that happened every four years or so, and this time they had decided to have it in Pennsylvania, Four Seasons Hotel.

He had, evidently, failed.

“Yes, Peter I know it isn’t a hotel!” Elias gritted out, breaking Martin from his reverie.

Peter, chipper as ever, replied with. “Did you use your Beholding powers for that one, too?”

Elias scowled, preparing to make a (in his mind, clever) retort, and Martin sighed, resting his hand on his temple, before a voice came from in front of them. A worker, evidently, who was meant to show them to the parking lot, where the conference would be help.

“Um, hello. I’m Scott, I’m going to be taking you to the-”

Elias snapped before Scott could finish, and a feeling of being watched by a thousand eyes washed over them. Martin, already used to it, rolled his own eyes, but Peter, considerably more private, receded into the fog,

It’s a wonder they’re married, Martin thought.

“Your coworkers all know that you steal money from the cashier to give to your sick mother. They’re going to reveal the information-”

“Elias.” Martin hissed out, “He’s just trying to help.”

Elias glared, but stopped talking. Poor Scott was shaking, but he silently led them to the parking lot, where they had put a podium and a few tables. The place was – to be quite honest – dreary. The sky was dulled in a looming grey, and the concrete seemed to echo it in kind, making it look grimy and dirty. There were two or three cars at the far-left part of it, but the rest was left empty, save for the podium and the leaves that had fallen to the ground.

“Why’d you even have a podium? I thought this was a landscaping place?” Martin asked, breaking the awkward silence that had fallen.

“Oh-um. Some clowns used it.”

“Clowns?” Elias’ gaze sharpened. If the Circus of the Other was involved then-

“The, uh, the Republicans.” Scott said awkwardly, shifting.

Elias scowled. That was worse than the Circus.

After another long silence, Scott spoke up hesitantly. “The conference starts at 11:30, right? There’s not really much to do around here, besides the,” he gestured to his left, at Fantasy Island, Adult Bookstore, and then to his right, at Delaware Valley Cremation Center, “you know. Why not take a look around the shop?” It was clear from his tone that the boy had been asked to say that.

“Sure, why not. Elias, Peter, you stay here, yeah?” Martin looked back at the three – no, two people, since Peter was still hiding, like the socially awkward bastard he was – and decided he’d do anything to not have to hear the couple, recently between divorces (though who knew how long that would last), bicker on and on any longer.

Before Elias had a chance to protest, Martin was zipping inside, looking at various landscaping tools absentmindedly.

“Hell of a week, huh?” Scott said, conversing as he moved boxes.

“Mm.” Martin agreed, humming absently. “Something happen?”

“Besides the election? Yeah, a few things.” Scott set down a box, leaning against the counter of the reception desk, dark and dusty in the dim lights of the shop.

It smelled of some sort of mildew, and maybe…cheetos? He wondered where that came from, but then remembered that some Republicans had apparently been here sometime in the past, so it made sense.

“What kind of things?” Maybe it was the Beholding in him, but Martin did find himself a bit curious.

“Well, Putin’s resigning because Destiel became cannon. Oh! And that Ted Bundy roleplayer got called out.” Scott told him, adding on the last few words, almost as if an afterthought.

Martin paled. “Ex-excuse me? Did I hear that right?” He didn’t know what to say to that. It seemed like something out of a dream.

Americans.

Scott nodded. “Where’ve you been? It’s been all everyone is talking about.”

“I. Um. Another dimension apparently.” Which wasn’t actually a lie, considering what the Lonely was, Martin decided. Peter would certainly agree.

Though he couldn’t imagine Peter getting involved with internet things, or most memes. The ones he occasionally sent Martin were all ones about minions, which the ship’s captain seemed almost uncannily amused by.

“Yeah, sure seems it. Anyway, what’s with your boss? He’s creepy as fuck.”

Martin snickered, then stopped when he felt the pull of all-too familiar, ever-seeing eyes on him once more. Scott had no such reservations.

“What the-what the fuck? What is that?” Scott gestured, referencing the feeling of being watched that had now began to fade, though not entirely, into the background.

“Um, nothing. It’s nothing, and you shouldn’t worry about it, I promise.” Martin said, making it very clear in his tone that if Elias tried something, Martin would make his life hell, at least until the three-day conference was over.

Scott looked skeptical, but nodded anyway, apparently not wanting to get involved. Martin didn’t blame him; he’d never wanted to get involved either. But here he was, at Four Seasons Total Landscaping, next to a sex shop and a crematorium.

“Now, um, do you have any metal pipes? I think Elias may be looking for a new one.”

#tma #the magnus archives #four seasons total landscaping #four seasons #meme #crack #elias bouchard #martin blackwood #peter lukas #fanfic #tma fanfic #crack treated seriously #fanfiction #tma fanfiction #oneshot